1 00:00:01,520 --> 00:00:04,800 Speaker 1: I rush out of there like Cruela Deville in one 2 00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 1: hundred and one Dalmatians Death, gripping the wheel, red eyed, 3 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:14,520 Speaker 1: just like mad, and I go back to our apartment. 4 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,000 Speaker 1: I throw the credit card at him sitting on the couch, 5 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,000 Speaker 1: and I scream, do you recognize these numbers? 6 00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:37,720 Speaker 2: I'm Andrea Gunning and this is Betrayal, A show about 7 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:40,960 Speaker 2: the people we trust the most and the deceptions that 8 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:47,640 Speaker 2: change everything. A few months ago, my twin sister called me. 9 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:50,720 Speaker 2: She wanted to connect me with someone who had a 10 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 2: betrayal story of his own. It was her favorite fitness instructor, 11 00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:56,720 Speaker 2: Ryan Lewis. 12 00:00:57,200 --> 00:00:58,880 Speaker 3: Ryan's a force of nature. 13 00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:01,520 Speaker 1: There's some days teach four classes a day and I'll 14 00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:04,480 Speaker 1: still find time to take a class as well. 15 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:07,920 Speaker 2: Ryan has an infectious energy. I can attest to this 16 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:10,880 Speaker 2: firsthand because I used to take his class in my hometown. 17 00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:14,039 Speaker 2: That only does he have the best music, but the 18 00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:17,800 Speaker 2: way he motivates the class, it's not just physical, it's 19 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:18,959 Speaker 2: also emotional. 20 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:21,559 Speaker 3: I may or may not have cried in his class before. 21 00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 1: Sometimes I bring my teaching home with me in terms 22 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:28,559 Speaker 1: of like making somebody's day, or making somebody's life better, 23 00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:29,399 Speaker 1: or whatever it is. 24 00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:34,200 Speaker 2: Ryan's inclined to put other people's happiness first, sometimes to 25 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 2: a fault, and one of his core values is to 26 00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:38,520 Speaker 2: assume the best in others. 27 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:43,040 Speaker 1: I will take somebody's word for what it is as 28 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:47,040 Speaker 1: they're giving me, and I will believe them. And it's 29 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:48,840 Speaker 1: just because I'd rather live in a world like that 30 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:52,440 Speaker 1: than live in a world where I constantly, I don't know, 31 00:01:52,520 --> 00:01:53,600 Speaker 1: have my guard up. 32 00:01:55,520 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 2: He grew up outside of Philadelphia in a well to 33 00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:01,559 Speaker 2: do family. He's very close with his parents and siblings. 34 00:02:01,840 --> 00:02:04,600 Speaker 2: The family is ambitious, academic. 35 00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 4: And I was kind of the one that went and 36 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:08,160 Speaker 4: charted my own path. 37 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:12,680 Speaker 2: As a teenager, Ryan got into theater and his parents 38 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 2: were at every performance, like when he was cast as 39 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,519 Speaker 2: Jean Valjean in a local theater production of La Miz. 40 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:22,320 Speaker 1: There were seven performances. My dad was at every single 41 00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:24,720 Speaker 1: one of them. But he came to see it and 42 00:02:24,720 --> 00:02:26,200 Speaker 1: he was talking to one of my friends, who then 43 00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,000 Speaker 1: shared this with me. They were like, you must be 44 00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 1: so proud of him, and He's like, of course I am. 45 00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 1: You know, I was expecting to be in the bleachers 46 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 1: of like a Friday Night Lights kind of situation, but 47 00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 1: this is like his varsity jacket moment. 48 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,720 Speaker 3: After graduating high school, he went to NYU. 49 00:02:41,440 --> 00:02:42,160 Speaker 4: Being in New York. 50 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:46,200 Speaker 1: City, that's when I feel like my actual day dating 51 00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:46,919 Speaker 1: life started. 52 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:50,360 Speaker 2: He started his first serious relationship with a guy he 53 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:53,960 Speaker 2: met online. He was eleven years older than Ryan, and 54 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:56,079 Speaker 2: he had an established job in finance. 55 00:02:57,360 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 1: There was a part of me, a large part of me, 56 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,640 Speaker 1: that genuinely loved this man. But at the same time, 57 00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:06,000 Speaker 1: I was also loving the stuff that I was getting 58 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,760 Speaker 1: from him, which were drugs that I was looking for 59 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: that I couldn't really afford. 60 00:03:11,639 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 2: The two of them would go on benders together, partying 61 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:19,639 Speaker 2: and doing cocaine. When the relationship ended, Ryan's cocaine didn't. 62 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:23,000 Speaker 2: His next boyfriend noticed it immediately. 63 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:27,160 Speaker 1: He came over and I was very noticeably high, and 64 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:28,480 Speaker 1: he was like, are we going out. 65 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:30,320 Speaker 4: Tonight or something? And I was like nope. 66 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:33,880 Speaker 1: So then he was like, I'm not going to do 67 00:03:33,919 --> 00:03:37,880 Speaker 1: this anymore. This has to immediately stop or I'm going 68 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: to leave you. So I did until I found a 69 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:46,480 Speaker 1: way to keep that drug usage secret to the point 70 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 1: where I would just hope that he would then go 71 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:50,600 Speaker 1: to bed or something and then I could party all night, 72 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:51,800 Speaker 1: which I did. 73 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 4: He fell in. 74 00:03:54,160 --> 00:03:55,160 Speaker 3: Love with this new guy. 75 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:58,400 Speaker 2: It was the first time he could see himself with 76 00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:02,160 Speaker 2: someone long term. But all the while Ryan was lying 77 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:06,120 Speaker 2: to him hiding his drug use. His boyfriend would draw 78 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,920 Speaker 2: a line in the sand. Ryan would promise to get clean, 79 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,960 Speaker 2: but then he'd end up using again and the cycle 80 00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:17,200 Speaker 2: would repeat itself. Ryan says that this was his rock bottom. 81 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,719 Speaker 1: I went to do what would be my last line 82 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:24,800 Speaker 1: now over ten years later. I just didn't feel anything, 83 00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:28,279 Speaker 1: and I had, you know, the six or seven before 84 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:31,400 Speaker 1: that of the night, but it just stopped working. And 85 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:35,600 Speaker 1: it kind of was just this bigger moment, bigger than 86 00:04:35,680 --> 00:04:38,400 Speaker 1: myself kind of moment, this realization of, like, I think 87 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:41,360 Speaker 1: this party is over. I had to come clean to 88 00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:45,000 Speaker 1: him that, like I had used again, and then he 89 00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:47,599 Speaker 1: had called my parents. My mom flew up no return ticket, 90 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:50,760 Speaker 1: and she was like, I'm not leaving New York City 91 00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:52,840 Speaker 1: until we get you the help that you need. 92 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:59,599 Speaker 2: Ryan started going to alpatient rehab every day. He and 93 00:04:59,640 --> 00:05:03,280 Speaker 2: his boy my friend, ultimately separated. Today, Ryan's been sober 94 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 2: for ten years. Back when he first got sober, he 95 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:10,919 Speaker 2: found a new clarity on his priorities. He was twenty three, 96 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:15,039 Speaker 2: a recent graduate with a degree in business administration, and 97 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 2: he landed a corporate marketing job, but getting sober changed him, 98 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:22,159 Speaker 2: and marketing analytics felt empty. 99 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 4: I don't know. 100 00:05:24,080 --> 00:05:26,160 Speaker 1: How I can show up to work and try to 101 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:28,520 Speaker 1: sell something that I have to put on somebody else's 102 00:05:28,520 --> 00:05:31,000 Speaker 1: hat for. I just like to come from a really 103 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 1: authentic place. 104 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:36,039 Speaker 3: And what he was passionate about was fitness. 105 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 1: At the time, I was a frequent and avid writer 106 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:45,279 Speaker 1: at soul Cycle. It was my transfer addiction, probably writing 107 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 1: like seven to ten times a week, doubling Monday Wednesday 108 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 1: Friday morning six am seven am. 109 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:53,479 Speaker 4: Crazy. I know. 110 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:58,000 Speaker 2: He went so often that one day an instructor asked 111 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,200 Speaker 2: if he would be interested in tea. 112 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,120 Speaker 1: I just graduated college from like one of the top 113 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:07,960 Speaker 1: undergrad and graduate business schools in the country, and I 114 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:10,039 Speaker 1: couldn't imagine saying to my parents, Hey, I'm going to 115 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:12,080 Speaker 1: leave this to go become a cycling instructor. 116 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,320 Speaker 3: But he decided to give it a shot, no matter 117 00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:16,280 Speaker 3: what his parents thought. 118 00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:20,640 Speaker 1: I wanted to wake up every morning excited for what 119 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:22,040 Speaker 1: I got to do. 120 00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 2: Of course, he was hired and began instructor training right away. 121 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:29,839 Speaker 3: He knew that this wasn't just a job. It was 122 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 3: going to be his career. 123 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,880 Speaker 1: They moved me to Philly because they were opening up 124 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:37,039 Speaker 1: the first studio there. They knew I was from there 125 00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:38,240 Speaker 1: and they wanted me to be a part of the 126 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:41,400 Speaker 1: opening team. And so I did that and opened up 127 00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:43,599 Speaker 1: the two studios that are now there today. Was there 128 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,080 Speaker 1: for like seven years. 129 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:49,479 Speaker 2: After investing his entire twenties in growing his career, he 130 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 2: wanted a partner he could build a life with, someone 131 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 2: who could match his passion and energy. 132 00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:56,880 Speaker 4: I have a. 133 00:06:57,040 --> 00:07:00,880 Speaker 1: Huge heart and I have a lot of feelings, and 134 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:02,960 Speaker 1: so I like to think that there is somebody out 135 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:06,080 Speaker 1: there who is open to connecting that deeply and it 136 00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:07,640 Speaker 1: comes from a really authentic place. 137 00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:12,120 Speaker 2: In twenty nineteen, Ryan got a coveted summer position teaching 138 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:14,680 Speaker 2: in the Hamptons. He was on the dating apps but 139 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:18,760 Speaker 2: wasn't expecting to find anything serious. After all, it's a 140 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:19,680 Speaker 2: vacation town. 141 00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 1: I've definitely had my fair share of hookups via Grinder, 142 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:26,320 Speaker 1: like I have no shame about that. Very sex positive, 143 00:07:26,920 --> 00:07:31,880 Speaker 1: but I still don't execute as much as like the 144 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: opportunity maybe comes up. 145 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:38,360 Speaker 2: Ryan had a lot of unopened messages on his dating apps, 146 00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:41,240 Speaker 2: but one day he got a message that piqued his interest. 147 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 3: It was from a guy we're going to call Jacques. 148 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:49,240 Speaker 1: I remember just being like, this man is so attractive. 149 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:53,600 Speaker 1: He had a bit of mystery to him. He's just 150 00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:59,200 Speaker 1: like a very like Jason Momoa in shape guy, darker 151 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:04,680 Speaker 1: complexion and tattoos everywhere. And then he's also French. He 152 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:07,480 Speaker 1: has a French accent as well, which like add that 153 00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:07,960 Speaker 1: to it. 154 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,520 Speaker 3: Jock invited him over and Ryan didn't hesitate. 155 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:14,360 Speaker 4: For this one. I was like, I'm going. 156 00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:18,720 Speaker 2: When he got to Jacques's house in the Hampton's, he 157 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:22,640 Speaker 2: was impressed. Jacques was a high level marketing executive with 158 00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:23,920 Speaker 2: the lifestyle to match. 159 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:28,440 Speaker 1: He had this very cute, like cottagey kind of thing 160 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:31,240 Speaker 1: out there that had a pool. We went in the 161 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:35,720 Speaker 1: pool first, and he was very quiet, very like introverted, 162 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:38,000 Speaker 1: and for that like I can't sit in silence, so 163 00:08:38,040 --> 00:08:41,280 Speaker 1: I'm just like wow, lahlah blah, talking for ever, just 164 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 1: so like we weren't hit the silence again, still that 165 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:48,160 Speaker 1: air of mystery, and then we started making out in 166 00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:50,880 Speaker 1: the pool and I just remember being like there was 167 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:55,840 Speaker 1: some electricity here I have never felt before, just this 168 00:08:55,960 --> 00:09:00,640 Speaker 1: like raw magnetism. And then we had sex and it 169 00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,040 Speaker 1: was the same thing, and I was just like, oh 170 00:09:03,080 --> 00:09:05,160 Speaker 1: my god, this wow. 171 00:09:06,679 --> 00:09:09,840 Speaker 2: After their fleeing, he and Jacques followed each other on Instagram. 172 00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:13,800 Speaker 2: Summer was nearly over when they met, so Ryan returned 173 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:16,679 Speaker 2: to his regular teaching position in the city without seeing 174 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:21,199 Speaker 2: him again. Over the next few years, their only contact 175 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:22,920 Speaker 2: was the occasional EMOJIDM. 176 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:27,319 Speaker 3: That was until Ryan posted a photo from his family vacation. 177 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:31,440 Speaker 1: I was in Saint Bart's with my family and he 178 00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:35,000 Speaker 1: had DMed me excited posted a picture. It was like, 179 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,000 Speaker 1: that's my favorite place on the planet. And he grew 180 00:09:38,080 --> 00:09:42,880 Speaker 1: up on Saint Bart's. Then we started talking and immediately 181 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:47,600 Speaker 1: just very much back and forth, flirting, vulgar, not vulgar, 182 00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:51,800 Speaker 1: like all the things. And if I feel something, I'm 183 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:55,480 Speaker 1: going to materialize it to words and share it with you. 184 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:59,040 Speaker 1: And so I shared with him like I had never 185 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:05,240 Speaker 1: felt something so electric, something so magnetic as the afternoon 186 00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:08,520 Speaker 1: that we spent together, and I will never be able 187 00:10:08,559 --> 00:10:12,080 Speaker 1: to stop thinking about it. And he's echoing the same 188 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:16,520 Speaker 1: thing back to me. And so then we were going 189 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:20,480 Speaker 1: back and forth, and it was just a matter from 190 00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 1: then who's going to go visit who first? 191 00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:28,680 Speaker 2: Even though it was a few years since they met, 192 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,680 Speaker 2: their chemistry still felt electric. Ryan had moved back to 193 00:10:32,679 --> 00:10:36,000 Speaker 2: New York City and Jacques was living in Miami, so 194 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:38,840 Speaker 2: Ryan me plans to go visit him there. A couple 195 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:42,120 Speaker 2: of days before Ryan was set to arrive, Jaques called, 196 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 2: He's like, I've. 197 00:10:44,640 --> 00:10:47,840 Speaker 1: Got some bad news. I have a friend that's going 198 00:10:47,920 --> 00:10:51,880 Speaker 1: through something and she has the rest training order against 199 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:56,920 Speaker 1: her husband who has been physically abusing her, and she's 200 00:10:57,000 --> 00:11:00,160 Speaker 1: taking her kid with her and needs a place to stay, 201 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,360 Speaker 1: so she's going to stay at my apartment. 202 00:11:04,440 --> 00:11:08,079 Speaker 2: It wasn't ideal, but he was struck by Jacques's generosity. 203 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:11,600 Speaker 1: I'm just like, that's so nice of you. I'm so 204 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,240 Speaker 1: sorry that your friend is going through that. 205 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:17,520 Speaker 2: They weren't able to stay together at Jaques's place, but 206 00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:21,440 Speaker 2: Jacques had a solution. A friend with an Airbnb said 207 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,120 Speaker 2: that they could use it at a discount, so Ryan 208 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:26,720 Speaker 2: paid him five hundred dollars for the place and boarded 209 00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:27,720 Speaker 2: a plane to Miami. 210 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:32,040 Speaker 1: And I remember seeing him and this was the first 211 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,880 Speaker 1: time I was seeing him in four years, being like 212 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:40,720 Speaker 1: I am in big trouble. Immediately was just like ah, 213 00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:45,199 Speaker 1: Like the heart started picking up all the things Butterflies 214 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:45,679 Speaker 1: was like. 215 00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:47,440 Speaker 4: Here we go. 216 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:08,760 Speaker 2: Ryan took that first weekend with Jock slow. He already 217 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:12,160 Speaker 2: knew they had a magnetic attraction. He wanted to get 218 00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:13,840 Speaker 2: to know Jack on a deeper level. 219 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:16,520 Speaker 1: I'm at this point in my life where like, I 220 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:19,840 Speaker 1: want to start my next chapter, my settling down chapter, 221 00:12:20,520 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 1: at least in terms of personal life. 222 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:26,240 Speaker 2: They stayed up late and talked about their lives. Jock 223 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:30,840 Speaker 2: had multiple citizenships, spoke four languages, and owned homes around 224 00:12:30,920 --> 00:12:33,800 Speaker 2: the world, all thanks to his illustrious career. 225 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:39,959 Speaker 1: She was a very decorated marketing professional. He had worked 226 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:46,240 Speaker 1: for three huge luxury designer brands over in their Europe offices. 227 00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:51,120 Speaker 1: He had worked for one of the most premier hotel 228 00:12:51,559 --> 00:12:52,800 Speaker 1: organizations as. 229 00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:56,040 Speaker 4: Well, which was the job that he was in at 230 00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:56,560 Speaker 4: the time. 231 00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:01,800 Speaker 1: I was just like, Wow, you are in aggressive, impressive. 232 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,800 Speaker 2: He traveled for work nearly every week and was really 233 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:08,559 Speaker 2: well connected, which came with a lot of perks. It 234 00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:11,600 Speaker 2: wasn't just his resume that impressed Ryan, it was also 235 00:13:11,679 --> 00:13:13,839 Speaker 2: his commitment to health and fitness. 236 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:17,440 Speaker 1: He would get up at five or five thirty every morning. 237 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,240 Speaker 1: First thing he would do is work out. He also 238 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,800 Speaker 1: didn't drink, so it was all these values that I 239 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:28,640 Speaker 1: was connecting to, but what the stickiness was was the 240 00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:34,640 Speaker 1: emotional vulnerability and access that he was giving. 241 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:40,360 Speaker 2: Like Ryan, he was present, emotionally intelligent, empathetic. 242 00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:44,720 Speaker 1: We talked at the end of the weekend, right before 243 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:45,959 Speaker 1: I was about to leave, so I was like, well, 244 00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:46,800 Speaker 1: what are we doing here? 245 00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:48,640 Speaker 4: Am I coming back down here? Are you coming up 246 00:13:48,679 --> 00:13:49,240 Speaker 4: to visit me? 247 00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:49,440 Speaker 2: Like? 248 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:54,280 Speaker 1: Are we moving forward with this? And he was like yeah, absolutely, 249 00:13:54,600 --> 00:14:01,840 Speaker 1: and so I left excited, but so like, what are 250 00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:06,320 Speaker 1: we then? Which sounds crazy after spending one weekend, but 251 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:07,960 Speaker 1: again for me, I was like, I've known you since 252 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:10,720 Speaker 1: twenty nineteen, We've talked throughout these past four years, so 253 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:12,560 Speaker 1: like a foundation has been set. 254 00:14:13,559 --> 00:14:16,800 Speaker 2: Jacques was the full package, the right guy that Ryan 255 00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:17,840 Speaker 2: had been waiting for. 256 00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:22,960 Speaker 3: When he went back to New York, Ryan was almost giddy. 257 00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:26,880 Speaker 1: We were texting like all day every day, pretty much 258 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 1: like first text in the morning, last text at night. 259 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:32,360 Speaker 2: They made plans for Ryan to go to Miami again 260 00:14:32,920 --> 00:14:36,000 Speaker 2: just a few weeks later, and this time he stayed 261 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:39,760 Speaker 2: at Jack's apartment. It was all white, with tall ceilings 262 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:44,240 Speaker 2: and big glass windows. Ryan could see himself spending a 263 00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:46,880 Speaker 2: lot more time there and so. 264 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:49,880 Speaker 1: I asked him, like, what is this, Like I left unsure, 265 00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:53,280 Speaker 1: are we still like dating around in the places that 266 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:56,160 Speaker 1: we live whatever? He was like, oh no, ever since 267 00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:58,840 Speaker 1: you left, I've stopped that. 268 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:03,040 Speaker 3: That night they made it a and to seal the deal, he. 269 00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:07,160 Speaker 1: Tells me that he loves me, and usually I'm the 270 00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:10,120 Speaker 1: person that gives that away real early in a relationship, 271 00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:14,200 Speaker 1: and I was just like, finally, like somebody is as 272 00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:19,200 Speaker 1: emotionally open and ready to be vulnerable as I am, 273 00:15:19,280 --> 00:15:21,560 Speaker 1: and like feels as deeply as I do, and all 274 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 1: these things. 275 00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:26,760 Speaker 2: They started dating long distance, but that didn't stop them 276 00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:29,080 Speaker 2: from daydreaming about their future together. 277 00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:32,880 Speaker 1: He was like, I definitely want to get married to somebody. 278 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:35,760 Speaker 1: I do think I want to have kids, and like 279 00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:37,840 Speaker 1: whenever we talked about that, it was always talking about 280 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:40,560 Speaker 1: it as I want you as that person. 281 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,320 Speaker 3: The distance became excruciating. 282 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,840 Speaker 2: After every visit, Ryan fell more in love with Jacques 283 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:50,840 Speaker 2: and with Miami. 284 00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:54,600 Speaker 1: I would crying the uber on the way to the airport, 285 00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:56,640 Speaker 1: cry on the plane, and a part of it was 286 00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:59,040 Speaker 1: because yes, I was saying goodbye to him, but also 287 00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:01,360 Speaker 1: it is because like I was saying goodbye to Miami, 288 00:16:01,440 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 1: and I loved being here, loved being here. 289 00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:07,800 Speaker 2: One day, when Ryan was back in New York, he 290 00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,840 Speaker 2: got a surprising text from Jacques. 291 00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:13,080 Speaker 1: He sends me a picture in like the middle of 292 00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:16,280 Speaker 1: the afternoon on a weekday, and it's of his left 293 00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:21,480 Speaker 1: ring finger and it says three nineteen twenty twenty three. 294 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:26,160 Speaker 2: That date was their anniversary, the day they made it official. 295 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,960 Speaker 1: And like, for me back then, I was like, I 296 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 1: make moves like that, scary moves like that, Like nobody's 297 00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:37,760 Speaker 1: ever done that for me. And so I was just like, Wow, 298 00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:42,200 Speaker 1: this is real, real, real, real, And so I was 299 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:45,080 Speaker 1: just like hook line sinker, like when are we making 300 00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 1: this happen? 301 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:46,680 Speaker 4: When am I moving here? 302 00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:50,880 Speaker 2: They started making plans for Ryan to move in. He 303 00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:53,680 Speaker 2: couldn't get a full time teaching position in Miami until 304 00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:56,480 Speaker 2: next year, so he'd have to pick up classes when 305 00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:56,880 Speaker 2: he could. 306 00:16:58,160 --> 00:16:59,720 Speaker 4: And so I'm going. 307 00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:02,320 Speaker 1: To get I don't know how many classes, but I'm 308 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,320 Speaker 1: like very much paid per class, So I'm going to 309 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:06,359 Speaker 1: be taking a pay cut from what I have right now. 310 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,919 Speaker 1: And he was like, don't worry about a thing. I 311 00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:12,120 Speaker 1: will cover Rent, I will cover all this stuff, maybe 312 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:14,440 Speaker 1: help out with groceries every week. 313 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:16,800 Speaker 4: And I was like I can do that. 314 00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,440 Speaker 2: At the time, Jacques was the CMO at a luxury 315 00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:24,240 Speaker 2: hotel brand. He could afford to cover some of their 316 00:17:24,280 --> 00:17:27,320 Speaker 2: bills Before they took the big step to move in together. 317 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:29,080 Speaker 3: Ryan invited him. 318 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:32,600 Speaker 2: To meet his parents, who'd also relocated to Florida. His 319 00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:36,400 Speaker 2: parents loved the idea of Ryan being close by. When 320 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 2: they met for dinner, Jacques made a big first impression. 321 00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:43,240 Speaker 1: He was very good at sharing all these stories about 322 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:47,399 Speaker 1: how this hotel brand had locations all around the world 323 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,360 Speaker 1: and that he had been to ninety percent of them 324 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:52,480 Speaker 1: on like the company's. 325 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:55,040 Speaker 4: Jet with the CEO, all of this stuff. 326 00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,919 Speaker 2: In fact, Jacques arrived at the dinner straight from a 327 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,320 Speaker 2: day of work at the CEO's estate. 328 00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,199 Speaker 1: It showed up having just gotten back from his house 329 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:07,879 Speaker 1: working there for the day and everything, saying that he 330 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:10,159 Speaker 1: had a great salad that was prepared by his chef 331 00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:14,240 Speaker 1: and all these things and whatnot. First name dropping, first 332 00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,160 Speaker 1: name dropping, and so I was just like, okay, cool. 333 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:20,680 Speaker 2: Jacques seemed a bit nervous, but he passed the test 334 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 2: for Ryan's parents after. 335 00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:26,000 Speaker 3: That and moved to Miami. Was just a matter of logistics. 336 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:29,200 Speaker 1: We had settled on a date of end of August 337 00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:31,879 Speaker 1: for me to move to Miami, and she was like, 338 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:33,880 Speaker 1: I'll take care of everything. You just have to pay 339 00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:34,399 Speaker 1: for the flight. 340 00:18:35,800 --> 00:18:38,719 Speaker 3: When he got there, life with Jacques was better than 341 00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:39,480 Speaker 3: he imagined. 342 00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:43,399 Speaker 1: It was like honeymoon. I was also just like honeymooning 343 00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:48,320 Speaker 1: with Miami. I was just over indexing on joy, cooking 344 00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:51,280 Speaker 1: at home every night, you know, going to walk his dog, 345 00:18:52,119 --> 00:18:56,240 Speaker 1: our dog, and so it very much felt like, Wow, 346 00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:56,840 Speaker 1: this is it. 347 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:00,880 Speaker 2: He knew Jacques was the one, and it came from 348 00:19:00,960 --> 00:19:02,120 Speaker 2: the simple moments. 349 00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:04,000 Speaker 1: I was there at the park with him and he 350 00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:06,760 Speaker 1: was like holding my hand or had his arm around 351 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,280 Speaker 1: me and all this stuff, and I was just like, wow, 352 00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:13,600 Speaker 1: you are really proud to be my boyfriend. 353 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:20,600 Speaker 2: Everything was going smoothly until one day Jacques came home 354 00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:24,280 Speaker 2: and said he quit his executive marketing job, just out 355 00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:24,840 Speaker 2: of the blue. 356 00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:27,280 Speaker 4: He just walked in one day and was like, I 357 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,200 Speaker 4: just quit. I was like what. 358 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:34,680 Speaker 2: The announcement rattled Ryan, especially considering that Jacques assured him 359 00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:36,639 Speaker 2: that he would support the couple financially. 360 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:41,040 Speaker 1: But he owned two apartments in Paris and so he 361 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:43,440 Speaker 1: was getting like a steady stream monthly income from. 362 00:19:43,359 --> 00:19:46,560 Speaker 2: That, and he was well connected in the marketing world. 363 00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:50,440 Speaker 2: He said he'd find another job no problem, and Ryan 364 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:56,320 Speaker 2: trusted him. Ryan focused on settling into the new city, 365 00:19:56,600 --> 00:20:00,399 Speaker 2: making friends, and exploring Miami's music scene. One of his 366 00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:03,280 Speaker 2: favorite bands was coming into town, so he borrowed his 367 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:06,640 Speaker 2: dad's credit card to get pre sale tickets. A few 368 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:10,320 Speaker 2: weeks later, Ryan logged in to pay off the bill. 369 00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:14,159 Speaker 1: The balance was a lot higher than what the tickets 370 00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:20,360 Speaker 1: were for, and so I look and there's two line items. 371 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:24,560 Speaker 1: One was Ticketmaster, the other was for nine hundred and 372 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:28,320 Speaker 1: ninety dollars, and it was something something like a name 373 00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:32,240 Speaker 1: of some sorts Fort Lauderdale, And so I was like, okay, 374 00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:32,800 Speaker 1: that's weird. 375 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:36,040 Speaker 2: He contested the charge and submitted a report, and he 376 00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:39,000 Speaker 2: told his parents to keep him posted about the fraudulent charge. 377 00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:42,520 Speaker 2: A few weeks later, he was in between teaching classes 378 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:44,320 Speaker 2: when he got a text from his mom. 379 00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:47,800 Speaker 3: She wanted to talk on the phone right away. Her 380 00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:51,960 Speaker 3: formality scared him. He feared a family emergency. 381 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:58,680 Speaker 1: And so I called, and she goes, are you at 382 00:20:58,680 --> 00:20:59,480 Speaker 1: home right now? 383 00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:01,960 Speaker 4: And I was like no, and she was like great. 384 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:06,399 Speaker 1: And then my dad goes, hey, Ry, and I very 385 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,320 Speaker 1: much realized I was on speaker. Both of them were 386 00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:12,840 Speaker 1: on the phone. That never happens. They were like, so 387 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:18,159 Speaker 1: we got the results back from American Express and it 388 00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 1: turns out that that charge is very real. It's shock 389 00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:28,520 Speaker 1: and it's for a divorce lawyer. Did you know that 390 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:29,240 Speaker 1: he was married? 391 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:49,879 Speaker 2: Ryan's parents called in with news about a fraudulent charge 392 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:53,439 Speaker 2: on their credit card. They'd done a full investigation and 393 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:56,840 Speaker 2: traced the charge to a divorce lawyer in Fort Lauderdale. 394 00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:00,719 Speaker 2: What they found was Jacques had met with a lawyer 395 00:22:01,560 --> 00:22:05,399 Speaker 2: and he charged that meeting to their AMX. 396 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:11,679 Speaker 1: I started crying, freaking out, hysterics, and I was like, 397 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,120 Speaker 1: I'm going to call you in an hour. 398 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:15,880 Speaker 4: I have to go teach right now. So I hung up. 399 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,440 Speaker 1: I went in to teach the class somehow, and I'm 400 00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:24,520 Speaker 1: just like, everything is falling apart very quickly. I get 401 00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 1: out of class. I rush out of there like Cruela 402 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:33,320 Speaker 1: Deville in one hundred and one Dalmatians Death, gripping the wheel, 403 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:34,520 Speaker 1: red eyed. 404 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:35,800 Speaker 4: Just like mad. 405 00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:40,639 Speaker 1: And I'm talking to my parents about it. They're like, 406 00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:42,000 Speaker 1: what are you going to do? And I was like, 407 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:44,199 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm going home right now to talk to 408 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:47,360 Speaker 1: this man. And they're like, obviously, you have to leave him. 409 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:48,359 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean. 410 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:55,760 Speaker 2: Probably Ryan wanted answers he needed to hear Jacques explain himself. 411 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:04,320 Speaker 1: I go to our apartment and I throw the credit 412 00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:07,320 Speaker 1: card at him sitting on the couch, and I screamed, 413 00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:10,320 Speaker 1: do you recognize these numbers? And he's like, what are 414 00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:14,199 Speaker 1: you talking about? Hands up on guard. I was just like, 415 00:23:14,280 --> 00:23:16,360 Speaker 1: do you recognize these numbers? And he was like, why 416 00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:19,040 Speaker 1: do you keep asking me that? And I was like, 417 00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:24,600 Speaker 1: there was a credit card charge for over nine hundred 418 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:27,760 Speaker 1: dollars that was for a divorce lawyer based in Fort 419 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:34,199 Speaker 1: Lauderdale and the invoice had your name on it. And 420 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 1: he was like, that's crazy. Why would I use your 421 00:23:37,359 --> 00:23:39,080 Speaker 1: credit card to do that? And I was like, I 422 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:43,120 Speaker 1: don't know, like you tell me, and he was just 423 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:48,880 Speaker 1: so aggressively denying it, even though like the cold heart evidence. 424 00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:49,200 Speaker 4: Was right there. 425 00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:54,800 Speaker 3: They fought that whole night until Jacques finally confessed that, yes, 426 00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:57,600 Speaker 3: he was in the process of getting divorced. 427 00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 1: He was basically saying things like it was all for 428 00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:03,840 Speaker 1: a green card. We were dating, but we agreed to 429 00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,439 Speaker 1: get married and whatever, and then you know, it ended, 430 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:11,480 Speaker 1: and he was using me like I was the provider 431 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,440 Speaker 1: and whatnot, and I had to get out of there 432 00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:17,679 Speaker 1: basically saying things like that, and so for me, I 433 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,560 Speaker 1: was like, I don't know if there's really that much there. 434 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:24,159 Speaker 3: He said that using Ryan's credit card or his parents' 435 00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,840 Speaker 3: credit card rather was just an accident, but that confession 436 00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:31,439 Speaker 3: was quickly overshadowed by what Ryan discovered. Next. 437 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 2: He wanted to search Jock's phone to see if there 438 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:35,960 Speaker 2: was anything else he was hiding. 439 00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:38,840 Speaker 1: I was like, give me your phone, and so he 440 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:40,960 Speaker 1: hands it to me. I immediately go to his Instagram 441 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:45,080 Speaker 1: and his text messages, and there are over thirty forty 442 00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:51,639 Speaker 1: conversations with all different guys. It varies from dirty talk 443 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:56,560 Speaker 1: to sending pictures to sending video to proof that he 444 00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:00,720 Speaker 1: invited men over, dating back to when we had started 445 00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:03,760 Speaker 1: dating in March, and all throughout. 446 00:25:04,640 --> 00:25:07,520 Speaker 3: For each person he talked to, Jacques was putting on 447 00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:09,000 Speaker 3: a totally. 448 00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:12,240 Speaker 2: Different persona, and Ryan didn't recognize any of them. 449 00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:16,640 Speaker 1: I remember distinctly saying to him, I do like dirty talk, 450 00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:20,080 Speaker 1: especially if we're going to do long distance pictures, videos, whatever. 451 00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:23,840 Speaker 1: I want to feel physically connected to you. And he's like, 452 00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:27,320 Speaker 1: it's so outside of my comfort zone. But I'm gonna 453 00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 1: work on it. It never happened, never happened. And so 454 00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:36,879 Speaker 1: the stuff that I was reading, even though it's something 455 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:40,680 Speaker 1: that I like doing, was to a level I would 456 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:47,760 Speaker 1: never say, and so I'm like screaming at him about that. 457 00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:51,280 Speaker 1: You seem to have no problem. 458 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:51,280 Speaker 4: Being like this. 459 00:25:55,600 --> 00:26:00,679 Speaker 2: Ryan scrolled through Jacques's messages with dozens of guys, furious 460 00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:06,400 Speaker 2: and heartbroken, but also confused because Jacques didn't have one 461 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:07,560 Speaker 2: story about his life. 462 00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:08,879 Speaker 3: He had many. 463 00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:13,919 Speaker 1: There were so many different ways that he was talking 464 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:17,679 Speaker 1: to these guys where sometimes they would call him out 465 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:19,919 Speaker 1: and be like I thought you were seeing somebody, and 466 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,680 Speaker 1: he would respond with yeah, so like nothing's going to 467 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:26,120 Speaker 1: happen here, And then the next time if somebody said 468 00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:27,840 Speaker 1: that to him, he'd be like, yeah, but I can. 469 00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:30,960 Speaker 4: Do whatever I want, or yeah a word. 470 00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:33,480 Speaker 1: In an open relationship where like he doesn't have to 471 00:26:33,520 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: know anything like that, And so I'm just reading all 472 00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:42,320 Speaker 1: of this those messages he couldn't deny, and surprisingly he didn't, 473 00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:43,719 Speaker 1: but he created a story. 474 00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:47,919 Speaker 2: Joqu's story was that these flings happened before he started 475 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:51,639 Speaker 2: dating Ryan, but it was a bold lie, considering Ryan 476 00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,560 Speaker 2: could see the time stamps on the messages and knew 477 00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:58,879 Speaker 2: it wasn't true, so he decided to DM one of 478 00:26:58,920 --> 00:26:59,359 Speaker 2: the guys. 479 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,280 Speaker 1: And so there was this one guy that I got 480 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:06,679 Speaker 1: the sense that he had been over a lot. I 481 00:27:06,720 --> 00:27:09,640 Speaker 1: just said, hey, what's up, and he goes, hey, because 482 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:13,320 Speaker 1: my front grid had pictures of me and Shock together, 483 00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:17,040 Speaker 1: can you let your boyfriend know that he owes me 484 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:17,920 Speaker 1: sixty dollars? 485 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,240 Speaker 4: And I was like Jesus Christ. 486 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,159 Speaker 1: I said, I'll do my best, but I'm going to 487 00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,000 Speaker 1: let you know you're probably not going to see that 488 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:28,560 Speaker 1: money back. 489 00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:34,879 Speaker 2: Ryan confronted him again and that's when he saw a 490 00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:35,800 Speaker 2: new side of Shock. 491 00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:40,320 Speaker 1: He then starts to have a full on breakdown in 492 00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:43,760 Speaker 1: front of me and was just losing it. I'd never 493 00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:46,840 Speaker 1: seen him really cry before, and he was like, you know, 494 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:50,119 Speaker 1: I grew up as kind of a fat kid, was 495 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:53,040 Speaker 1: bullied a lot, was not looked at in any sort of, 496 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:56,960 Speaker 1: you know, attractive way, And ever since I started working 497 00:27:56,960 --> 00:28:00,399 Speaker 1: on myself, I've been getting a lot of attention. And 498 00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:03,280 Speaker 1: it's the first time that I'm really receiving that. And 499 00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,600 Speaker 1: I obviously enjoyed it, but then it's very clear that 500 00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:08,480 Speaker 1: I enjoyed it too much, and I never meant to 501 00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:08,879 Speaker 1: hurt you. 502 00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:13,680 Speaker 2: Seeing Jacques distraught and vulnerable triggered Ryan's need to help 503 00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:15,080 Speaker 2: to make it better. 504 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,840 Speaker 1: There is a part inside me that did not want 505 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:21,159 Speaker 1: to admit that what I had been waiting for for 506 00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:23,280 Speaker 1: quite some time that had finally arrived. I was not 507 00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:26,560 Speaker 1: ready to let go. I was really holding on to like, no, this, 508 00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:30,240 Speaker 1: I found him, this is it. It's my person. I'm 509 00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:31,000 Speaker 1: fighting for this. 510 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:35,440 Speaker 2: It also reminded him of his own rock bottom ten 511 00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:38,720 Speaker 2: years earlier, when his boyfriend at the time stupped by 512 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,240 Speaker 2: him and got him the help he needed to get sober. 513 00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:47,120 Speaker 1: When I had hit rock bottom, my boyfriend at the 514 00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:49,920 Speaker 1: time had stayed with me, and I was like, this 515 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:54,120 Speaker 1: feels like Jacques's emotional rock bottom, and this is my 516 00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,200 Speaker 1: chance to pay it forward and be there for my partner, 517 00:28:57,800 --> 00:28:59,040 Speaker 1: and so I decided to stay. 518 00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:03,600 Speaker 2: Joaqu was talking about his mistakes openly with Ryan, which 519 00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:07,320 Speaker 2: felt like the right step. And Ryan knew that relationships 520 00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:08,400 Speaker 2: were nuanced. 521 00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:12,000 Speaker 1: I had always worked through, or tried my best to 522 00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:17,800 Speaker 1: work through the tougher moments in relationships, because realistically they're 523 00:29:17,840 --> 00:29:21,360 Speaker 1: not perfect. He was willing to go to therapy by 524 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:25,440 Speaker 1: himself and with me. He was showing up and fully surrendering, 525 00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:28,400 Speaker 1: which for me is what I did ten years ago 526 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:29,160 Speaker 1: for myself. 527 00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:33,760 Speaker 3: So they set up new boundaries, boundaries that Jock agreed to. 528 00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:37,800 Speaker 1: He was agreeing to anything I said. You will not 529 00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:41,400 Speaker 1: have access to Instagram. Instagram is now under my email 530 00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:44,480 Speaker 1: and my phone number, and I'm changing the password and whatnot. 531 00:29:45,880 --> 00:29:49,520 Speaker 2: Ryan was comfortable giving Jaques a second chance, but when 532 00:29:49,560 --> 00:29:50,200 Speaker 2: he told his. 533 00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:55,880 Speaker 3: Parents, they were not happy. They had done their own 534 00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,040 Speaker 3: research on Jock. 535 00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:01,480 Speaker 1: When the divorce lawyer charge came through. They had done 536 00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:06,960 Speaker 1: their research and found that when you google him, it's 537 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,480 Speaker 1: his LinkedIn and then it's a court case. 538 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,960 Speaker 2: Jacques was named in a lawsuit over an illegal sublet 539 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,400 Speaker 2: and unpaid rent scheme in the Hamptons. The case amounted 540 00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:21,480 Speaker 2: to fraud worth over one hundred thousand dollars, but there 541 00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:24,720 Speaker 2: was an explanation. It was his ex husband, the one 542 00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:28,040 Speaker 2: from the green card marriage. He was actually the one 543 00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:31,760 Speaker 2: responsible for those charges, but because they were married, Jacques 544 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:33,160 Speaker 2: was also named on the lawsuit. 545 00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:36,000 Speaker 1: I'm talking to my parents about it and they're bringing 546 00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:37,960 Speaker 1: up the court case. I'm like, no, he's been cleared 547 00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:41,360 Speaker 1: of that. They had no case or whatever, and I'm 548 00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:43,120 Speaker 1: waiting for him to get the documents, like, I'll send 549 00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:43,479 Speaker 1: it to you. 550 00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:48,600 Speaker 2: Ryan's parents didn't buy it, and in fact, it created 551 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:52,200 Speaker 2: a rift between them, the first one they ever had. 552 00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,760 Speaker 1: My mom and I did not talk. I would occasionally 553 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:56,560 Speaker 1: talk to my dad. 554 00:30:57,200 --> 00:31:00,000 Speaker 2: Ryan doubled down and said he wouldn't be coming home 555 00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:03,760 Speaker 2: for Thanksgiving if Jacques couldn't come too. He felt that 556 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:08,000 Speaker 2: Jacques deserved a second chance, just like everyone else, and 557 00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:14,120 Speaker 2: his parents just didn't understand. Soon, Jacques was no longer 558 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:18,320 Speaker 2: the problem. The problem became Ryan's parents. 559 00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:22,040 Speaker 1: When I started to like not believe him and start 560 00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:25,200 Speaker 1: to question him, he would always say, you sound just 561 00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:26,240 Speaker 1: like your mom right now. 562 00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:29,880 Speaker 2: During this time, Ryan needed to buy a new car 563 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:33,080 Speaker 2: for work. With their relationships seemingly on the right track, 564 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:36,000 Speaker 2: he and Jacque decided to go in on their dream 565 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:37,040 Speaker 2: car together. 566 00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 4: We both really. 567 00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:41,960 Speaker 1: Wanted to Ford Bronco really badly, and so we had 568 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,400 Speaker 1: bought one. He said that we're not going to get 569 00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:46,480 Speaker 1: approved for it if my name's on it, because my 570 00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:49,200 Speaker 1: credit's really bad because I just bought this apartment and 571 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:50,040 Speaker 1: sold the other one. 572 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:53,040 Speaker 4: And so I was like, oh, that's fine, Like I'll put. 573 00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:54,840 Speaker 1: My name on it, and he was like, we'll just 574 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:56,520 Speaker 1: split the monthly payments and whatnot. 575 00:31:57,360 --> 00:32:00,000 Speaker 3: They ordered the car and had it fully customized. 576 00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:05,040 Speaker 1: It was all in ninety two thousand dollars, which was 577 00:32:05,040 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 1: fine with because for me, I was still like, I 578 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,760 Speaker 1: can afford half of the monthly payments as long as. 579 00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:11,440 Speaker 4: You're paying half. 580 00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:14,360 Speaker 3: Then the first car payment came. 581 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,480 Speaker 4: I Venmo requested him for it. 582 00:32:16,680 --> 00:32:22,680 Speaker 1: He gets it back to me immediately, and then I 583 00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:25,920 Speaker 1: get all the emails from Venmo. It's all that transaction, 584 00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:28,920 Speaker 1: and then there's one from like twenty minutes before that 585 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:32,680 Speaker 1: says that I paid Jock eight hundred dollars, and I 586 00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:36,480 Speaker 1: was like, no, I did. I requested something around that 587 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,320 Speaker 1: from him, but I did not pay him, and so 588 00:32:40,360 --> 00:32:42,080 Speaker 1: I was like, that's weird. So before I like bring 589 00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:43,480 Speaker 1: it up, I was like, let me go into my app, 590 00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:46,080 Speaker 1: look at the ledger. It's very much there that I 591 00:32:46,200 --> 00:32:49,320 Speaker 1: paid him eight hundred dollars. And then there's also me 592 00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:52,640 Speaker 1: paying one hundred and eighty dollars two days before, and 593 00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:55,360 Speaker 1: then about one hundred and fifty a day before that. 594 00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,800 Speaker 4: I for sure did not do any of those. 595 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:03,240 Speaker 2: But Ryan, I never got an email receipt about these payments, 596 00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:04,680 Speaker 2: so I. 597 00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:07,240 Speaker 1: Was like, let me look at the trash bin, and 598 00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 1: that's where the emails were. There was the only two 599 00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:14,120 Speaker 1: emails sitting in there. And that's when I absolutely knew 600 00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:17,680 Speaker 1: that it was him, because I don't delete emails because 601 00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:20,320 Speaker 1: I'm afraid I'm gonna need something, so I archive all 602 00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:24,840 Speaker 1: my emails, and so he had gone into my phone, 603 00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:29,400 Speaker 1: paid himself, and then went into my email and cleared 604 00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:30,760 Speaker 1: the history of it. 605 00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:35,240 Speaker 2: There it was proof that Jacques was not only stealing 606 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,800 Speaker 2: money from him, but he was covering it up. 607 00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:42,320 Speaker 1: And it was after the fact of that instance where like, 608 00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:46,400 Speaker 1: you hit to me what I called your rock bottom, 609 00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:47,400 Speaker 1: but it turns out it's not. 610 00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:50,560 Speaker 4: This is just who you are. It's just who you are. 611 00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:57,320 Speaker 2: That was that when Ryan made this discovery, Jaques was 612 00:33:57,360 --> 00:34:00,880 Speaker 2: out of the house, so he took the opportunity to run. 613 00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:06,320 Speaker 1: He was out walking his dog, and I got as 614 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:11,680 Speaker 1: much stuff as I could of mine and left called 615 00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:14,920 Speaker 1: my parents. My mom and I were both hysterically crying 616 00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:18,440 Speaker 1: over the phone, just because, like my dad said, his 617 00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:20,720 Speaker 1: seventies on my mom's in her sixties, and I lost 618 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:23,960 Speaker 1: being able to go see her. I was going to 619 00:34:24,040 --> 00:34:25,640 Speaker 1: do that in October and I was going to do 620 00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,799 Speaker 1: that November and I didn't, and I even canceled going 621 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:31,080 Speaker 1: to Thanksgiving with them because I was like, I'm not 622 00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:33,319 Speaker 1: going to Thanksgiving if my boyfriend's not allowed to come 623 00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:37,080 Speaker 1: to Thanksgiving kind of thing. And I said no to 624 00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:42,000 Speaker 1: my parents because of this. I felt so bad. I 625 00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:45,360 Speaker 1: felt so sorry because like I didn't believe my parents 626 00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:49,280 Speaker 1: or I didn't want to listen to them, and it sucked. 627 00:34:50,840 --> 00:34:54,720 Speaker 1: That's just time that I'll never get back that he stole. 628 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,200 Speaker 1: And granted it could have been a lot longer. Could 629 00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:00,440 Speaker 1: have signed off for the rest of my life with 630 00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:03,360 Speaker 1: this man and therefore signed off from the rest of 631 00:35:03,360 --> 00:35:04,560 Speaker 1: my life with my parents. 632 00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:09,120 Speaker 2: His parents forgave him immediately, but the process of leaving 633 00:35:09,200 --> 00:35:13,120 Speaker 2: Jacques was just beginning then. 634 00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:17,520 Speaker 1: It was very much like Operation Rescue, and so I 635 00:35:17,600 --> 00:35:19,320 Speaker 1: stayed in a hotel. 636 00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:19,880 Speaker 4: For a week. 637 00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,600 Speaker 2: Ryan thought he was going to spend the rest of 638 00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:25,319 Speaker 2: his life with this man, and now he wasn't sure 639 00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:26,440 Speaker 2: if anything. 640 00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:27,800 Speaker 3: He'd been told was true. 641 00:35:28,600 --> 00:35:31,719 Speaker 2: He needed to talk to Jacques's ex husband, you know, 642 00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:33,640 Speaker 2: in the Green Card marriage. 643 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:37,400 Speaker 1: I was just like, I don't think I can sink 644 00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:42,080 Speaker 1: any lower right now, so let's at least say so. 645 00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:44,280 Speaker 4: I was like, Hey, this is Ryan. 646 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,640 Speaker 1: I was dating Jacques and just broke up with him, 647 00:35:47,680 --> 00:35:50,200 Speaker 1: and I just loved to talk to you about your experience. 648 00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:52,719 Speaker 1: The first thing that he said to me was that 649 00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:55,839 Speaker 1: man is scum and deserves to be in jail. And 650 00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:59,720 Speaker 1: I was just like, okay, we can talk, we can talk. 651 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:05,360 Speaker 2: His ex had a lot to say about Jaques, especially 652 00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:07,640 Speaker 2: the lies he discovered in their marriage. 653 00:36:08,120 --> 00:36:10,920 Speaker 1: Jacques had claimed that not only was he French and 654 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:13,560 Speaker 1: therefore a citizen of there, he was also a dual 655 00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:16,840 Speaker 1: citizen of Israel and he had fought in the IDF. 656 00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:23,239 Speaker 1: They were in their government interview before their wedding and 657 00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:28,239 Speaker 1: the official had asked Jacques, have you ever served in 658 00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:32,800 Speaker 1: an international military service? And Jaques just flat out and 659 00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:36,399 Speaker 1: said no. And his ex sat next to him being 660 00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,719 Speaker 1: like in his mind, like obviously not going to bring 661 00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:40,480 Speaker 1: up in front of a government official, but like, why 662 00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:41,680 Speaker 1: are you lying to this person? 663 00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:46,120 Speaker 3: Did he ever fight in the IDF? Or was that 664 00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:47,000 Speaker 3: another lie? 665 00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:50,120 Speaker 2: All those stories Jacques told him about how his ex 666 00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:57,880 Speaker 2: husband was leeching off him, the opposite was true. Ryan 667 00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:00,920 Speaker 2: and Jacques's X talked almost every week for those first 668 00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:04,280 Speaker 2: few months they were both members of a crappy club. 669 00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:08,120 Speaker 1: He is such a good guy and in their relationship 670 00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:12,000 Speaker 1: was the provider and was so generous with Jacques. Again 671 00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:14,680 Speaker 1: really believed that he also had found this person. 672 00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:22,120 Speaker 2: Ryan also found a mutual friend, someone who'd known Jacques 673 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:25,839 Speaker 2: in Saint Bart's. He'd been invited to Jacques's childhood home, 674 00:37:26,160 --> 00:37:27,480 Speaker 2: which was a huge mansion. 675 00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:32,440 Speaker 4: He looked it up. It's an airbnb that he rented. 676 00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,960 Speaker 2: After Ryan got out of the relationship and started to 677 00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:38,719 Speaker 2: see the deception and lies for what they were, he 678 00:37:38,800 --> 00:37:42,280 Speaker 2: developed a new theory about Jacques. Jacques had always seemed 679 00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:45,800 Speaker 2: to be so perceptive. He always knew what Ryan was 680 00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,480 Speaker 2: thinking and what he was worried about before he even 681 00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:53,080 Speaker 2: said anything. But maybe it was more sinister than just intuition. 682 00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:56,600 Speaker 2: When Jacques was out of the apartment, Ryan would talk 683 00:37:56,640 --> 00:38:00,200 Speaker 2: on the phone to his friends, his parents, his therapist. 684 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:06,400 Speaker 1: He has a ring camera or whatever for his dog, 685 00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:09,360 Speaker 1: and he would pick up on the conversations and listen 686 00:38:09,360 --> 00:38:11,600 Speaker 1: to them. He listened to every single one of my 687 00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:16,240 Speaker 1: therapy sessions. He would leave the apartment and sit somewhere else, 688 00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:20,040 Speaker 1: but he was very much tuning in and listening to 689 00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:24,160 Speaker 1: the entire hour. That's like the long con of it all, 690 00:38:24,440 --> 00:38:27,200 Speaker 1: which is just like I need to know what is 691 00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:30,280 Speaker 1: making this guy tick right now so I can hold 692 00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:35,839 Speaker 1: on and keep pulling from him. 693 00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:39,239 Speaker 2: No wonder he was so intuitive. He was listening in 694 00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:43,640 Speaker 2: on Ryan's therapy sessions all along. It was total manipulation 695 00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:48,160 Speaker 2: to make Ryan feel like Jacques truly solemn, understood him, 696 00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:55,560 Speaker 2: loved him. How much money did Ryan lose in this relationship? 697 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:58,239 Speaker 2: This is what he estimates. 698 00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:04,439 Speaker 1: It is fifty eight thousand dollars this cars, but under 699 00:39:04,480 --> 00:39:08,800 Speaker 1: my name. Obviously, I took it with me when I left, 700 00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,920 Speaker 1: and at some point I was like, this is stupid 701 00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:15,720 Speaker 1: for me to have, and so I went to sell it, thinking, 702 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:17,439 Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm gonna make money off of this. 703 00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:18,040 Speaker 4: This is great. 704 00:39:18,920 --> 00:39:22,319 Speaker 1: Apparently I was kind of an idiot to not read 705 00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:25,680 Speaker 1: the fine print and just trust. But we had bought it, 706 00:39:25,840 --> 00:39:28,920 Speaker 1: I think twenty thousand dollars over MSRP because at that 707 00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:32,560 Speaker 1: point Ford Broncos were so heavy in demand, and then 708 00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:36,480 Speaker 1: in a matter of four months nobody really wants them. 709 00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:38,600 Speaker 1: And so when I went to sell it, I sold 710 00:39:38,600 --> 00:39:42,520 Speaker 1: it into a loss of forty two thousand dollars. 711 00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:49,120 Speaker 2: Ryan stayed in Florida, and so did Jock in the 712 00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:52,680 Speaker 2: same apartment. Ryan doesn't want to leave Miami because he 713 00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:53,440 Speaker 2: loves it there. 714 00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:57,080 Speaker 3: They have run into each other from a distance. 715 00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:02,640 Speaker 1: I saw him walking into his building because unfortunately, part 716 00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:05,719 Speaker 1: of my commute is to drive by that building. And 717 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:10,960 Speaker 1: he was walking in with his dog, wearing a black hoodie, 718 00:40:11,880 --> 00:40:14,960 Speaker 1: and I just like and I realized that the back 719 00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:18,880 Speaker 1: of his sweatshirt says sad Dad's on it, which is 720 00:40:18,920 --> 00:40:22,040 Speaker 1: from the National the Band, a concert that I had 721 00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:23,719 Speaker 1: gone to right before I left New York to come 722 00:40:23,760 --> 00:40:30,080 Speaker 1: down here he's wearing my sweatshirt. I thought that I 723 00:40:30,080 --> 00:40:31,279 Speaker 1: had lost that sweatshirt. 724 00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:37,080 Speaker 2: It's strange watching from the sidelines as Jacques continues a 725 00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:40,600 Speaker 2: life of deception and lies. As for that tattoo that 726 00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:43,960 Speaker 2: Jacques got, the one with their anniversary date on his finger, 727 00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:48,279 Speaker 2: it was one of many tattoos Jaq had, tattoos. 728 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:49,480 Speaker 3: That Ryan now sees differently. 729 00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:53,480 Speaker 1: He has one it's like a dove and then it 730 00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,520 Speaker 1: goes into a name and I was like, who's that 731 00:40:57,120 --> 00:41:00,880 Speaker 1: and he says, oh, that was my friend in France 732 00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:04,120 Speaker 1: and we were on motorcycles together and I watched a 733 00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:08,120 Speaker 1: car hit him and he died, and now looking back, 734 00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:11,880 Speaker 1: I'm just like that was an next boyfriend. That was 735 00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:14,799 Speaker 1: an next boyfriend for me, Like I have to have 736 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,880 Speaker 1: some fun or like find some comedy in it. I 737 00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:23,719 Speaker 1: said to my friend, I wonder how I died. I 738 00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:26,359 Speaker 1: wonder what my story is. I'd really love to know. 739 00:41:27,840 --> 00:41:30,560 Speaker 2: Ryan's ready to let go of the shame and self 740 00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:34,400 Speaker 2: blame he felt after this betrayal, and telling his story 741 00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:39,160 Speaker 2: is part of that release. We end all of our 742 00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:42,879 Speaker 2: weekly episodes with the same question, why did you want 743 00:41:42,920 --> 00:41:44,200 Speaker 2: to tell your story? 744 00:41:44,840 --> 00:41:49,200 Speaker 1: I'm hoping that this is the final release for me. 745 00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:53,680 Speaker 1: This is no longer just mine. This is somebody else's 746 00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:55,759 Speaker 1: to connect to and be like I didn't think this 747 00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:58,560 Speaker 1: could happen to me, but like it actually can, because 748 00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:03,719 Speaker 1: it can happen to any Thank God, I'm not the 749 00:42:03,719 --> 00:42:06,880 Speaker 1: only one. 750 00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:10,320 Speaker 3: On the next episode of Betrayal. 751 00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:16,280 Speaker 4: People who are in this incredibly vulnerable spot of trying 752 00:42:16,360 --> 00:42:20,160 Speaker 4: to be better for their children. If I were evil, 753 00:42:20,239 --> 00:42:21,719 Speaker 4: I would leave that one alone. 754 00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:26,520 Speaker 3: You know that seems like a line. 755 00:42:27,239 --> 00:42:29,080 Speaker 2: If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal 756 00:42:29,120 --> 00:42:32,000 Speaker 2: team or want to tell us your betrayal story, email 757 00:42:32,080 --> 00:42:35,600 Speaker 2: us at Betrayal pod at gmail dot com. That's Betrayal 758 00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:38,319 Speaker 2: pod at gmail dot com. 759 00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:40,160 Speaker 3: We're grateful for your support. 760 00:42:40,680 --> 00:42:42,920 Speaker 2: One way to show support is by subscribing to our 761 00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:45,640 Speaker 2: show on Apple Podcasts, and don't forget to rate and 762 00:42:45,680 --> 00:42:49,160 Speaker 2: review Betrayal. Five star reviews go a long way. A 763 00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:52,759 Speaker 2: big thank you to all of our listeners. Betrayal is 764 00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:55,720 Speaker 2: a production of Glass Podcasts, a division of Glass Entertainment 765 00:42:55,719 --> 00:42:59,440 Speaker 2: Group and partnership with iHeart Podcasts. The show is executive 766 00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:03,279 Speaker 2: produced by Glass and Jennifer Fasin, hosted and produced by 767 00:43:03,320 --> 00:43:07,759 Speaker 2: me Andrea Gunning, written and produced by Monique Leboard, also 768 00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:12,000 Speaker 2: produced by Ben Fetterman. Associate producers are Christen Mercury and 769 00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:16,239 Speaker 2: Caitlin Golden. Our iHeart team is Ali Perry and Jessica Krinchech. 770 00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:20,320 Speaker 2: Audio editing and mixing by Matt del Vecchio, Additional editing 771 00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:23,000 Speaker 2: support from Nico Ruka and Tanner Robbins. 772 00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:26,040 Speaker 3: Betrayal's theme composed by Oliver Bains. 773 00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:30,840 Speaker 2: Music library provided by mybe Music and For more podcasts 774 00:43:30,840 --> 00:43:34,840 Speaker 2: from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 775 00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:36,560 Speaker 2: you get your podcasts.