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Speaker 1: During this on Garrett Garrett uh Gandhi was saying, Hey,

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Speaker 1: are we going to play a game?

3
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Speaker 2: Here?

4
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Speaker 1: Are we doing family feud?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 1: No, we can't. The host of family feud is pooping.

7
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Speaker 4: And then I came back and he gave.

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Speaker 1: You a poop card. I did you poop on my

9
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Speaker 1: my access card. I did not have time to do

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Speaker 1: number two. I only did a number one, you know,

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Speaker 1: and I found in history my history. Anyway, number three

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Speaker 1: goes faster than number two. Hey, can we talk about

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Speaker 1: the comedy of errors yesterday? Now? Okay, a lot of

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Speaker 1: these things you're gonna say, Oh, that's so boogie, that's

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Speaker 1: no problem. Okay, they add up. Okay, I don't think

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Speaker 1: he Okay. We get to the airport. Okay, we get

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Speaker 1: to Newark Airport and I have that clear Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 1: you just have to bat your eyes into the machine.

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Speaker 1: It lets you in. Yes. So I get in the

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Speaker 1: line for clear and it's they send us the corrals

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Speaker 1: down to where we need to go to get through

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Speaker 1: to you know, the t s a thing. Sarah, the

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Speaker 1: guy the green coat does that meet you? You're what

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Speaker 1: who are you? Where are you going? Well? I'm going

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Speaker 1: exactly where you told me to go No, you go

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Speaker 1: over there. She told me to go over here to

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Speaker 1: this line. You saw it. I saw my own eyes

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Speaker 1: with you guys.

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Speaker 4: I breezed right through.

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Speaker 1: I know. But clear at Newark Airport, why even go?

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Speaker 1: It's they've never been so unclear. Well, and it's the

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Speaker 1: clear combination. If you have clear and TSA pre check.

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Speaker 1: It used to be a scary called that the god

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Speaker 1: pass where you would basically walk onto them. No longer.

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Speaker 1: It is now the longest line and the longest way.

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Speaker 1: What has it?

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Speaker 2: My DSA pre without the clear was fast?

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Speaker 1: Okay? So I saw I saw TSA pre people were

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Speaker 1: going through SA So I said, I'll just go over there. No,

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Speaker 1: so you can't go there, You've already checked in the clear.

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Speaker 1: I said, I don't care. She said, no, you're you're

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Speaker 1: in the you're in the process. I said, I don't care.

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Speaker 1: So the problem here is they you do what they

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Speaker 1: tell you to do, and then someone else will clear

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Speaker 1: tells you to go over here. Yeah, they're there. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So we get to Okay, another bougie problem. We get

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Speaker 1: to the United Club and I scanned my ticket, No rejected.

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Speaker 1: I know I'm a member because I have the credit card, right,

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Speaker 1: the United Chase credit card. By the way, that's the

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Speaker 1: worst feeling in the world is being turned away at

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Speaker 1: the club. I felt like I was, you know, back

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Speaker 1: in college.

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Speaker 5: In all the world.

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Speaker 1: That's the worst feeling. It's the worst ever and all

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Speaker 1: the things going on in this world of ours that

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Speaker 1: is just gone awful. So once again I scammed my

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Speaker 1: ticket rejected, and I looked at the lady. I said,

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Speaker 1: why am I not getting in? I'm a member. You're

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Speaker 1: not getting in because you're not in the club. That's logical,

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Speaker 1: I said, I know. I want to be in the club.

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Speaker 1: That's the problem. I'm not in the club. No, you

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Speaker 1: got to be in the club. I can't get I

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Speaker 1: can't get into the club. So another lady came out

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Speaker 1: and helped me. I finally got into the club and

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Speaker 1: we ate, you know, all the bad food and everything whatever.

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Speaker 1: We get on the plane in the world's meanest most

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Speaker 1: evil woman, Cruel Deville, was sitting in the seat next

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Speaker 1: to me, separated from her husband in the back, and

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Speaker 1: they were having a fight.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you skipped the park where we were trying to

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Speaker 3: board the plane, and then oh yeah, told us to

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Speaker 3: go over here.

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Speaker 1: And then the other counterbalance turn and said no.

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Speaker 5: Okay, So again Bunji problems in front of everyone.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's scared, says it's the worst thing you think

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Speaker 1: it ever happened to you in your life. I mean,

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Speaker 1: read the news. Read the news. There's a lot of

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Speaker 1: really worse stuff going on.

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Speaker 5: But they did do that thing where they told us

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Speaker 5: basically to cut the line, which you know everybody hates.

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Speaker 1: So we did.

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Speaker 4: We go to cut the line, and then the lady

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Speaker 4: at the front was.

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Speaker 2: Not having it, and then did you see the face

85
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Speaker 2: of the past. Yeah, they were like, yeah, those idiots, It's.

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Speaker 1: Just it was just a day.

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Speaker 5: What about when we got to the hotel, Oh yeah.

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Speaker 1: Okay, right, so you know we're all getting ready to

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Speaker 1: you know, hop on board Norwegian Joy and you know

90
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Speaker 1: there are partners of ours and so you know, so

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Speaker 1: you guys, you know, you all just give me your

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Speaker 1: name and oh, here's your keys and enjoy because it's

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Speaker 1: all prepaid. Right, We're like, oh god, this is great.

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Speaker 1: Can you imagine going to the Guitar Hotel, which is

95
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Speaker 1: you know, all fun and games and restaurants and gambling

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Speaker 1: and this. Well, mister Duran, no, we need to see

97
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Speaker 1: the original credit card that paid for everyone's room. I said,

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Speaker 1: I don't have that's not my credit card. Excuse me. Well,

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Speaker 1: then we can't let you in. I said, would you

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Speaker 1: have any rooms? Availe, No, we're sold out. I said,

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Speaker 1: what about my room? Can I have that one? No,

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Speaker 1: you can't have that. So here's what we'll do. We'll

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Speaker 1: refund the money for your room to whoever paid for it,

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Speaker 1: but you have to pay for it. Okay. I think

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Speaker 1: it was like a three hundred, four hundred dollars room

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Speaker 1: or something like. Uh, it was beyond what I we

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Speaker 1: would pay, but they said, well, it'll be fifteen hundred dollars.

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Speaker 1: How come their rooms are three hundred and they're getting

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Speaker 1: there for free and I'm paying for mine at fifteen

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Speaker 1: hundred dollars, well with tax at sixteen forty nine. So

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Speaker 1: we get in, okay, I said, just put it on

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Speaker 1: a card. I'll make them pay me back later, right,

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Speaker 1: no problem. And then we get to work today. Nothing's working,

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Speaker 1: no nothing, nothing. We can't get on the air. We

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Speaker 1: can't connect to Los Angeles, Los Angeles, can't connect connect

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Speaker 1: to the world. Nothing's working, no nothing.

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Speaker 2: I don't forget you got sick too, Right, you didn't,

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Speaker 2: but that just added to it.

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Speaker 1: Almost died. It was good. I did look like a

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Speaker 1: guy dying trying to get off the airplane to the bathroom, right, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 3: I felt bad for you when you I thought you

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Speaker 3: need help. Walking up the ramp, I'm like, what's going on?

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Speaker 3: I was shaking, he was shaking. I was holding onto

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Speaker 3: the rail and getting up the ramp.

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Speaker 2: And his he had, his face was like a white ghost.

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Speaker 2: It was crazy how white it was.

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Speaker 1: It was awful. And then we were all looking at

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Speaker 1: each other, taking saying, who should go in? Nate, I'm

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Speaker 1: in the bathroom. You know, it's a public bathroom. I

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Speaker 1: don't know how. I don't remember getting there. I was

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Speaker 1: I was inebriated with sepsis. Something was going on, something,

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Speaker 1: something was leaking out.

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Speaker 5: They all, they all wanted to check on you too,

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Speaker 5: and I was like, I don't think you should.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but if he hadn't come out in five minutes,

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Speaker 2: we were.

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Speaker 1: Going on the enchiladas for I ate the enchilada's on

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Speaker 1: the plane. I don't do I don't think that was

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Speaker 1: the problem. I think that triggered something that was already

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Speaker 1: Maybe we're alive within.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So anyway, so here we are today. Now everything's working fine,

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Speaker 1: and the only content we have for our show is

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Speaker 1: talking about how yesterday was a complete failure and this

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Speaker 1: morning and this morning we walk in nothing worked. Nothing word.

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Speaker 2: Thank god for Claudia because if we didn't have her.

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Speaker 2: And the other thing is this our poor engineer that

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Speaker 2: was supposed to be here to help us. He is

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Speaker 2: homesick with the flow.

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Speaker 1: And the other engineer, the other engineers on vacation. And

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Speaker 1: there's a third guy they don't remember his name.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.

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Speaker 1: All of these hurdles have been thrown up in our way.

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Speaker 1: Is there a concern for the rest of the week.

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Speaker 1: Not at all.

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Speaker 2: This region's got us.

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Speaker 1: This is the beauty of Norwegian. Once you get on

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Speaker 1: board a Norwegian ship, they take care of you and

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Speaker 1: we don't have to worry. All the elevators work, all

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Speaker 1: the stairs work. You can actually take a step and

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Speaker 1: then a step and other step and they work. It's

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Speaker 1: the light at the end of the tunnel. So I

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Speaker 1: can't wait to hop on board Norwegian enjoy today. What's

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Speaker 1: so funny?

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Speaker 5: I just this entire thing right, because all of these

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Speaker 5: different things have gone wrong It's really fun for me

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Speaker 5: to observe the way everybody handles like crisis or a problem,

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Speaker 5: whatever goes wrong, because all of a sudden, I will say,

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Speaker 5: with you, when people try to step in to help

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Speaker 5: you out, You're like, no, yeah, I don't want it,

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Speaker 5: I'm not doing it, and then you just walk away

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Speaker 5: from whatever.

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Speaker 1: The thing is typical.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, So like I tried to give you the information

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Speaker 5: for your hotel, You're like, yeah, I'm not doing it.

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Speaker 5: And then at the United Club, I was like, I'll

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Speaker 5: just swipe you, like, nope, I gotta figure this out.

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Speaker 1: They need to figure it out because I'm a I'm

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Speaker 1: a member of the club.

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Speaker 5: Remember we went to get ice cream and I asked them,

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Speaker 5: instead of giving me two whole scoops, can you just

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Speaker 5: split one of them in half so I can try

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Speaker 5: two flavors. They said no, and he was going to

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Speaker 5: get ice cream and then he's like, I'm not getting

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Speaker 5: it anymore.

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Speaker 4: If I can't have what I want, I'm out.

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Speaker 1: If they're gonna treat my gandhi like that, I'm not

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00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:06,440
Speaker 1: gonna do it. But how did we do? Though?

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Speaker 4: Fine, we're fine, we're fine, laughing.

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Speaker 1: And we just laughed the only time I wasn't laughing

191
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Speaker 1: is when I thought I was about to die and

192
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Speaker 1: vomit and pass out and getting off the plane.

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Speaker 4: Of all the things that that would make me feel scary.

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Speaker 2: Did not throw anyone into a wall. When we were

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Speaker 2: all panicking.

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Speaker 1: We just laughed, just laugh. It's just a radio show.

197
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Speaker 1: Good god, it's not brain surgery. And then the brain

198
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Speaker 1: surgeons are in there doing brain surgery, going oh, let's

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Speaker 1: calm down. This isn't radio.

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Speaker 2: For sure.

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00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:38,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, so they're down eure up to speed.

202
00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:39,760
Speaker 1: I just want you to know what we're going through,

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00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:41,199
Speaker 1: what the hell we go through just to get this

204
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Speaker 1: show on. It's a show about a failing day.

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Speaker 4: I loved it. It's team building. We're all on the

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00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:49,200
Speaker 4: same page.

207
00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,960
Speaker 5: We're facing the same crisis together, or crises i should say,

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Speaker 5: over and over together, and we're learning.

209
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Speaker 1: But I want you to know I'm a member of

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Speaker 1: the club. A member of the club.

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00:08:59,160 --> 00:08:59,960
Speaker 2: They tell me I'm not.

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00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:03,960
Speaker 1: Because you know you remember and they tell you, and well, no, I,

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00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:06,240
Speaker 1: for God's sake, I am a member of this club.

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Speaker 1: They did this.

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00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:08,240
Speaker 5: I think it happened to every single one of us

216
00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:10,840
Speaker 5: when we went in because I again breeze right through

217
00:09:10,880 --> 00:09:13,640
Speaker 5: tsa no problem, which never happens for me. And then

218
00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:15,360
Speaker 5: I got there and that same thing I had to

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Speaker 5: go through quite a few steps to get in.

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Speaker 1: Okay, someone just sent a text. I want to hear

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Speaker 1: more about Cruela Deville, who sat next to the plane.

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Speaker 1: Such a bum.

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Speaker 4: She was such a bum.

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Speaker 1: Oh god, I think that was a permanent look on

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Speaker 1: her face. Yeah, I don't know. The couple was definitely fighting, Yes, Okay,

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Speaker 1: not my fault.

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Speaker 2: So then maybe we can give her a little bit

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Speaker 2: of a pass because she was probably in a really

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Speaker 2: bad place. But I never saw someone bring so much

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Speaker 2: crap on an airplane.

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Speaker 1: Oh god. No. She was repacking and unpacking and pack.

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Speaker 1: She had a glass avion bottle and she kept slamming

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Speaker 1: it down. I thought he was going to crash.

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Speaker 2: She was.

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Speaker 5: I just kept thinking about what the rest of her

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Speaker 5: life was like, because she seems so crotchety. Yeah, And

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Speaker 5: I was like, hmm, this lady has zero whimsy, no

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Speaker 5: fun whatsoever. Yeah, because I was turning around like playing

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Speaker 5: with you and grabbing your leg and stuff.

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Speaker 4: I think she was just pissed off about it.

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Speaker 1: And the incredible and the incredible flight crew the flight attendants.

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Speaker 1: There was one we were talking to who listens to

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Speaker 1: our show. Hello, I said that woman next to me,

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Speaker 1: she says, oh, I know. I thought I was. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just want you noticed I noticed, yes, But anyway,

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Speaker 1: they need to start building little passenger jails in the

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Speaker 1: back of the plane. They should.

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Speaker 4: When you act a fool, go back there.

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Speaker 1: Oh we could, we should duck taper to the seat. Well,

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Speaker 1: so I look. You can get on your phone and

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Speaker 1: it tells you how much longer you have for your flight? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And I'm cramping at this point right yes, and it

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Speaker 1: says one hour. I'm like, oh god, this is not

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Speaker 1: gonna work because once your land, then there's the time

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Speaker 1: to get to the gate and then you're gotta get

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Speaker 1: off the So that looked a bit down and I'm

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Speaker 1: sweating at this point, and I can feel me getting

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Speaker 1: a little like I'm going to faint forty five minutes

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Speaker 1: and I didn't want to ask Cruela de Villa in

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Speaker 1: the seat next to me, can I get out again?

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Speaker 1: Because last time I got out, I I kicked a

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Speaker 1: wire for her charger on her phone and then plugged it.

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Speaker 2: She got all mad.

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Speaker 1: So I looked down at fifteen minutes, like, oh God,

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Speaker 1: and it's not good. I'm breathing, you know how, You

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Speaker 1: know how it is when you don't need to throw

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Speaker 1: up and you start salivating. And I could feel I

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Speaker 1: was cold and clammy. My tongue was cold. I could

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Speaker 1: feel the tote. I don't know why I knew that,

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Speaker 1: but so funny. We land and we stop. I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: just go forward, put it in drive.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, pilot, why are we stopped?

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Speaker 1: Give me to that gate? You get us there. We

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Speaker 1: just sat there waiting for some other stupid playing with

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Speaker 1: everyone who's healthy. We finally go, oh, here we go.

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Speaker 1: Didn't you park? And then you gotta wait for that

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Speaker 1: jetway to come out? And that thing wobbles, Like what

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Speaker 1: year is this? Those jetways looked like they were made

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Speaker 1: in nineteen fifty five. We're wobbling. I'm like, oh God,

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Speaker 1: and at this point it's gonna come out. It's gonna

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Speaker 1: come out every orifice in my botty, my ears, my eyes,

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Speaker 1: my mouth, my butt, everything parts of it. I felt

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Speaker 1: so bad, and I had my phone and I was shaking.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't get the phone in my backpack because I

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Speaker 1: was shaking, so I handed my phone to Gandhi. I said, Gandhi,

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Speaker 1: hold my phone, and she looked at me like, wow,

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Speaker 1: good dog, grab my bag. We got my bag. We

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Speaker 1: got off and I ran to that bathroom. Oh lord,

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Speaker 1: thank god you were.

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Speaker 2: In there a long time. I think that we might

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Speaker 2: have done this to you because we were all supposed

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Speaker 2: to sit next to you where one of us was,

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Speaker 2: and none of us did, and then you wind up

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Speaker 2: getting this like random sit next to you. So maybe

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Speaker 2: we jinxed you were ye.

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Speaker 1: Had you been next to me, I would not think

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Speaker 1: twice about getting off, getting out of the seat and

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Speaker 1: get out of my way. I gotta get that. Yeah right,

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Speaker 1: I go blow it up. Who would now? I went

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Speaker 1: into Pe the first time someone had already blown it up. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know it was. It was Cruella because she came

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Speaker 1: out before me and there was something stuck to the

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Speaker 1: bottom of the toilet. I don't know, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I'm not touching that.

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Speaker 5: Corella looks like she would do that too. I think

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Speaker 5: the greatest part about too is getting off the plane.

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Speaker 5: It's always good when you have Air Marshal Nate with you.

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Speaker 5: Nate will block that aisle.

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Speaker 1: If anyone tries to rush back by Nate. He stands up.

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Speaker 1: He's a human person. There is an unwritten rule on

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Speaker 1: an airplane when you land and you are getting off

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Speaker 1: that plane, you get off one row at a time,

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Speaker 1: and it's the row in front of you that goes

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Speaker 1: you wait for those people. There's no law, there's no rule,

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Speaker 1: there's nothing written down. But that's how it works.

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Speaker 4: Do not run to the front of the plane.

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Speaker 1: I will body block, I will hip check, I will

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Speaker 1: full on tackle you're you're there for us and all

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Speaker 1: all those you don't even know who are being screwed off.

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Speaker 1: And the strategy is to have Nate in that aisle seat,

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Speaker 1: so this way he could jump up, stick his ass

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Speaker 1: in front of you know, everybody behind him is stuck.

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Speaker 1: They cannot get in the good squats for a reason.

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Speaker 5: If somebody tries to be crappy with him too, back

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Speaker 5: up and let another row out.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, he doesn't care. He's all heroes wear capes

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Speaker 1: and thank you Nate jeans. Yeah. People ask you more

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Speaker 1: about Cruella. Wow, yeah, I know she doesn't listen to

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Speaker 1: our show because only happy people.

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Speaker 2: We don't know. We don't know her real name anyway, No.

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Speaker 1: Crew, Hella I don't know. All right, there you go,

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Speaker 1: which one. I want you to just be up to speed.

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Speaker 1: If you think you're having a bad day and all

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Speaker 1: these things happen, laugh at all.

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Speaker 2: Yeah you can.

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Speaker 1: You can still be a little sharp about it, a

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Speaker 1: little sarcastic, a little sassy about it. What else are

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Speaker 1: you gonna do?

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Speaker 5: Like, we couldn't control most of the things that happened.

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Speaker 5: They were outside of our controls. Laugh about it and

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Speaker 5: move on.

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Speaker 1: You know what, the younger me would not have handled

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Speaker 1: this quite the same. No, No, it's no. I'm totally

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Speaker 1: and I'm totally happy with that evolution.

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Speaker 4: Let me ask you, do you have bad airport juju?

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Speaker 5: Because I feel like whenever we travel, something weird happens

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Speaker 5: to you at the airport, usually to me, but when

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Speaker 5: I'm with you, I'm like, I'm safe.

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Speaker 1: No, I'm good, okay, typically and United is always great.

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Speaker 1: It was none of this was United's fault at all.

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Speaker 1: The club, The United club I have a problem with

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Speaker 1: because I'm a member of the club. Is that good

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Speaker 1: customer service? No, my thing isn't working. I know I'm

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Speaker 1: a member. Well, the reason why it's not working, sir,

355
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Speaker 1: is because you're not in the club. Okay, no, no,

356
00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:27,240
Speaker 1: that is not good customer service. Now, this other woman

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Speaker 1: saw me, saw how up sad I was, and she

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Speaker 1: pulled me aside and she took very good care of me.

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Speaker 1: So thank you, thank you, good woman. How about those cookies?

360
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Speaker 2: Oh my god, they were so thin and like chocolatey.

361
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Speaker 1: Yeah, in the club. Once I got in the club,

362
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Speaker 1: the cookies, the club cookies were good. I went back

363
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Speaker 1: for seconds. Doesn't your whole both for all of us?

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Speaker 2: Did you see the saltwater taffy? I took of that

365
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Speaker 2: for the plane.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. So you know, we basically ate all

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Speaker 1: the same stuff, So I don't think it was anything

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Speaker 1: that we ate that made me turned into a mount

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Speaker 1: will servious. There was a moment and you disappeared into

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Speaker 1: that bathroom. Then I'm like, this entire trip is hanging

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Speaker 1: in the balances, and then when you came out, you

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Speaker 1: were like a new man. It took me a while

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Speaker 1: to recover. All right, Look, okay, we bought on and

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Speaker 1: on about us, but thank you enough about us. What

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Speaker 1: do you think about us? I'm kidding, what are we

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Speaker 1: doing here?

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Speaker 3: Taking a break?

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Speaker 1: You know, Juju Green is gonna be on with us.

379
00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:25,160
Speaker 1: In a little while, Oh yeah, to talk about what

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Speaker 1: we're watching in the theaters and on screen at home.

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Speaker 1: And you know, he usually comes on a nine to

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Speaker 1: thirty ish East Coast time and little bit after, little

383
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Speaker 1: after nine o'clock East Coast time. If you're not listening

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Speaker 1: that late, typically on any weekday Fridays, make sure you

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00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:44,800
Speaker 1: stick around late so you can hear Juju. He's the best. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we totally love him