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Speaker 1: This is from Cole on Steve HARBFM. Cole says, my

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Speaker 1: ex and I were together for almost ten years, broke

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Speaker 1: up two years ago and she got married less than

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Speaker 1: a year after that. Over the weekend, she texted me

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Speaker 1: and told me she misses me and wants to be friends,

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Speaker 1: saying she doesn't want me out of her life completely.

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Speaker 1: I was polite but told her I'm not interested because

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Speaker 1: reopening that door feels unhealthy and disrespectful to both of us.

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Speaker 2: Am I wrong? Here's this question?

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Speaker 1: Am I wrong for setting a hard boundary and refusing

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Speaker 1: to stay connected to someone who's already built a new

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Speaker 1: life without me?

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Speaker 3: Hey, bru, don't do that. You know. We ain't got

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Speaker 3: a lot of instincts. But when they tell you when

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Speaker 3: you hit them along bales going on fellas, you got

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Speaker 3: to listen to them. They had no benefit to that.

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Speaker 3: I don't want you out of my life. I miss you. No,

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Speaker 3: you should have thought all that real, Neill, and you

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Speaker 3: knew the relationship was toxic.

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Speaker 2: Bro, Please you want to sign piece?

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Speaker 3: That's what she wants.

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Speaker 1: Well, he's not going for it, all right, all right, Steve,

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Speaker 1: we have time for one more. This is from Tanisha

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Speaker 1: Tanisha says, I moved halfway across the country to be

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Speaker 1: with my boyfriend after we'd been long distance for a while,

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Speaker 1: and now that I'm here, he works all the time.

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Speaker 1: I don't really know anyone yet, so every day I'm

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Speaker 1: alone in a new place, with nothing to do but

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Speaker 1: wait for him to come home exhausted.

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Speaker 2: I know he's doing this for his.

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Speaker 1: Career and our future, and I don't want to sound

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Speaker 1: needy or ungrateful, but at the same time, I gave

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Speaker 1: up my job, I gave up my friends and my

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Speaker 1: routine to be here, and I didn't expect to feel

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Speaker 1: this isolated. Isn't unfair of me to be unhappy? Or

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Speaker 1: is this a sign we didn't think this through enough.

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Speaker 3: Well, of course, that's a sign that you didn't think

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Speaker 3: it through it right, y'all didn't talk about this. You

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Speaker 3: didn't know that this man was busy. You don't know

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Speaker 3: this man trying to get his career together.

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Speaker 2: And she married to him. Yeah, yeah, I mean someone

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Speaker 2: they're not engaged.

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Speaker 3: You know, you went over there, y'all just made this move, y'all,

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Speaker 3: But now you're over there complaining. That's a little bit unfair,

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Speaker 3: because man, see I'm not saying this is your fault, ma'am.

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Speaker 3: I'm just saying y'all didn't talk this out. You didn't think,

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Speaker 3: you ain't think this, and you ain't think this out

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Speaker 3: at all. Now, you can't get mad at him for working.

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Speaker 3: Come on now, now, if he was spending time with

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Speaker 3: his boys and had all these extracurriculum activities and wasn't

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Speaker 3: spending time with you, complaint valid. But he had work,

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Speaker 3: then he come home exhausted. Now you're talking about what

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Speaker 3: all you gave up if you didn't want to give

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Speaker 3: it all up for him. Marriage is not for you,

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Speaker 3: because that's a part of it. Sometimes you have to

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Speaker 3: give up some other relationships to have the bigger better

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Speaker 3: what you know, you got to cut some people loose.

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Speaker 3: You can't be single and free and married at the

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Speaker 3: same time. Those two things can't exist. So maybe you

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Speaker 3: should just say, hey, listen, let me go back home

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Speaker 3: for a little while, and then when you get a

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Speaker 3: little bit more stable on your feet, we'll keep this

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Speaker 3: long dis relationship and then we'll see where it is.

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Speaker 3: Or you need to make the adjustment, get you a

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Speaker 3: job and get you some friends.

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Speaker 2: Right because she quit her job to move there.

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Speaker 3: Well, you know he did. He ask you to.

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Speaker 2: She followed her boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: You need to follow your husband, need to marry. She's

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Speaker 1: not engaged, she says, never ring nothing. She moved halfway

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Speaker 1: across the country for the time.

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Speaker 2: In a passle he work going already out there in

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Speaker 2: the middle of nowhere.

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Speaker 3: That's what she's at.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, Steve.

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Speaker 1: She's got to get out, she's got to get a job,

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Speaker 1: she's got to make some friends so she can have

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Speaker 1: a life of her own.

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Speaker 2: Then she wouldn't be so upset.

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Speaker 1: About this guy, or go back home and try to

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Speaker 1: get her old job back.

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Speaker 2: Right.

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Speaker 3: I don't think going back is the whole solution. First

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Speaker 3: of all, stop blaming him. Get yourself a job, and

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Speaker 3: make yourself some new friends. You know, that's what starting

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Speaker 3: over it looks like. Yeah, yeah, starting over don't mean

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Speaker 3: you get to go right back to where you was.

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Speaker 3: That ain't starting over. You're trying to start a life

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Speaker 3: with a man. It's going to require some refiring of

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Speaker 3: the injurines.

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Speaker 2: Thank you.

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Speaker 1: We'll have more of the Steve Harvey Morning Show coming

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Speaker 1: up at twenty minutes after. Right after this, you're listening

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Speaker 1: to the Steve Harvey Morning Show,