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Speaker 1: This is okayop.

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Speaker 2: I'm Samuel Donner and I'm John Fry and we read

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Speaker 2: the funniest stories on the internet.

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Speaker 3: Alrighty another Karen.

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Speaker 2: One.

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Speaker 4: Karen assaults me, steals my Christmas gift for my mother

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Speaker 4: and calls me a faith What.

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Speaker 3: That's That's not what you should be doing.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, none of that, none of that. Cross

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Speaker 2: it off the list.

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Speaker 4: Trying get out of here, op, He says, I was

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Speaker 4: online shopping this morning when I saw these gorgeous outdoor

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Speaker 4: Christmas lights at a really great price for my local store.

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Speaker 5: It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas everywhere. Take

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Speaker 5: a look at the five and ten listening once again,

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Speaker 5: candy canes and silver leans.

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Speaker 4: Are you know when you when you hear a song,

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Speaker 4: you're like, oh, I totally know the lyrics to that,

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Speaker 4: and then you sing it without any support and you're like,

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Speaker 4: I don't know the lyrics.

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Speaker 3: You saved it for us.

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Speaker 1: I barely knew the lyrics the fifth.

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Speaker 4: And that's impressive. And so here's the deal. My mother

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Speaker 4: loves Christmas.

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Speaker 1: Who doesn't.

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Speaker 3: But here's the sad part.

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Speaker 4: She's never had the money or the time to put

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Speaker 4: up any lights.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, but she's always longed to have some.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so that light.

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Speaker 4: I decided that as an early Christmas present, I would

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Speaker 4: get her some that she could be proud of what's done.

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Speaker 4: A nice sweet gesture of the op is a woman.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I should say woman, good woman, lady, good lady,

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Speaker 2: good good daughter. I love how I got to woman's

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Speaker 2: son before daughter.

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Speaker 4: Listen, people, when you're reading ten thousand stories, sometimes you

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Speaker 4: don't hit the.

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Speaker 1: Mark sometimes, and I just now, OPI.

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Speaker 4: Purchased some great deals online that light up like a reindeer,

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Speaker 4: my mother's favorite, some colorful strike strings, some candy canes,

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Speaker 4: so on and so forth, like she got the whole

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Speaker 4: kitt kaboodle here. I ordered them, paid with my credit card,

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Speaker 4: and was actually able to pick them up in the

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Speaker 4: store the same day for less than one hundred dollars,

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Speaker 4: a total steal. Wow, how wonderful is this story so far?

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Speaker 4: And how it won't end like this?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 4: No, When I get there, I see that there's a

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Speaker 4: long line at customer services, So I decided to browse

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Speaker 4: for a bit. I ended up getting another super duper

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Speaker 4: deal on a pair of dripping icicle lights.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I would get one free, dude, dude, Opie's going

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Speaker 2: ahead stealing deals right or left and right. Not even

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Speaker 2: Black Friday you getting deals.

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Speaker 3: She is a thief of great deals.

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Speaker 1: Oh.

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Speaker 4: I then added a strand of light up garland so

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Speaker 4: she could decorate inside more with the tree. Now I

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Speaker 4: know this is a lot, but I made good money

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Speaker 4: from doing remote lab work at my university, and I

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Speaker 4: had saved up enough for tuition. So I decided to

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Speaker 4: spoil my family after a not so great year.

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Speaker 1: So I go to so kind Opie.

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Speaker 4: It's it's like truly a beautiful thing. Her mother's never

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Speaker 4: had the time of money. She's getting all these great

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Speaker 4: you know, and just like keeps adding to it, which

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Speaker 4: I love. So it's going to be a very I'm

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Speaker 4: just imagining the most festive outdoor arrangement.

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Speaker 1: Can't wait.

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Speaker 4: I can't wait, right, So I go to pay, and

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Speaker 4: sure enough, the line of customer service is now a

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Speaker 4: lot shorter. I get in line and wait about twenty minutes,

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Speaker 4: and then I'm up at the counter. I present my

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Speaker 4: email proving my purchase, but it takes a bit for

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Speaker 4: the customer service person to scan the QR code as

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Speaker 4: the device.

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Speaker 1: Wasn't reading it correctly.

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Speaker 4: I had no problem with that, because hey, things happen. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: but then suddenly.

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Speaker 3: My own cart slammed into my side.

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Speaker 1: I am see.

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Speaker 4: It's interesting. So Opie had some strategy here. She had

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Speaker 4: put herself between the cart and the exit. She's read

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Speaker 4: one too many horror stories of people just like grabbing

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Speaker 4: it and running off with it, so she did this preemptively.

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Speaker 1: Whoa wait, what happened?

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Speaker 4: So op had read a bunch of stories about how

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Speaker 4: people like, as you're like at the checkout, people just

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Speaker 4: grabbed the cart and run for it.

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Speaker 1: What right?

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Speaker 4: So she had actually before any any bad stuff went down,

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Speaker 4: she had strategically positioned herself.

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Speaker 3: So someone could She was like in the way of

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Speaker 3: people getting the cart.

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Speaker 4: So interestingly, she was prepared for this disaster to a degree.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, it's kind of interesting geez circumstances. So

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Speaker 4: she did this to play it safe, and in theory

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Speaker 4: it actually kind of worked. Yeah, except for the fact

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Speaker 4: that now that someone had rammed her cart into her,

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Speaker 4: she was in a lot of pain. It rammed into

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Speaker 4: her hip bone and her knee, knocking her onto the

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Speaker 4: floor and almost whacking her hand.

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Speaker 1: My god.

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Speaker 4: The crazy lady who did this then tried to run

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Speaker 4: over her with the cart. What So she's down now

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Speaker 4: Op is down on the ground and the assailant is

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Speaker 4: trying to get away with her cart by running the

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Speaker 4: ridiculous gid you imagine ridiculous And then she started screaming,

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Speaker 4: you stupid little faith.

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Speaker 3: This lady was literally trying to steal the cart.

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Speaker 2: I feel like this is the worst heist in history,

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Speaker 2: Like the dumbest heist I've ever seen or heard of.

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Speaker 2: It's like Fast and Furious, but with carts and Karens

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Speaker 2: carts and Karens from Universal Studios.

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Speaker 4: That's my car, You Karens not have its starring Vin Diesels.

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Speaker 1: Karen, No, my cart.

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Speaker 3: This is mine.

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Speaker 4: Oh man, that'd be funny. I mean he's already ball

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Speaker 4: so he could don.

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Speaker 1: The wig very easy.

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Speaker 4: So, needless to say, Op was super pissed. So she

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Speaker 4: goes and call security and she's screaming at the lady

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Speaker 4: to stop her from trying to get the cart. And

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Speaker 4: then guess what happened? What Op is the one that

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Speaker 4: ends up detained? Oh my god, the Karen The security

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Speaker 4: guard detains Op. Yes, that's ridiculous, dude, know who did it?

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Speaker 1: Attained?

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Speaker 2: This is a Guantanamo Bay situation. Freaking lock it up

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Speaker 2: the wrong people.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, it's really not good.

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Speaker 4: So then Op twisted out of the security guards hold

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Speaker 4: and ripped the receipt out of her pocket to shove

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Speaker 4: it in their face. I have the receipt. You nasty

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Speaker 4: insults got him. We didn't censor that one, OP did.

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Speaker 4: Now he was startled and steps back and then stares

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Speaker 4: at the receipt. I snap at him that he needs

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Speaker 4: to get a pair of glasses because I have a receipt,

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Speaker 4: and this bish does not and calls me straight and

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Speaker 4: furthermore call me a freaking ambulance. Now, at this point,

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Speaker 4: another older security guard, a manager, and a supervisor come over.

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Speaker 4: The older security guard started berating the younger one for

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Speaker 4: jumping to conclusions and detaining me.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Now the manager checks my receipt and oh, wouldn't you

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Speaker 4: know it's all mine?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, combs that it again. Case solved.

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Speaker 4: And furthermore, Karen has no receipts whatsoever.

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Speaker 1: Boy.

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Speaker 4: Now, of course the lady starts wailing about how I

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Speaker 4: must have stolen a harvest saint, only to have the

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Speaker 4: trio go and get CCTV evidence. Wow, that it is

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Speaker 4: not hers, so they have a receipt, they have the CCTV, Like.

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Speaker 1: More evidence do they need? Ow much more.

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Speaker 3: Do we need here? For real?

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Speaker 4: I then have to sit on a bench with all

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Speaker 4: my eyes. I started to pack up while this crazy

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Speaker 4: Karen was detained. Police and EMTs arrived not too long after,

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Speaker 4: and the EMT started loading me on the stretcher. Turns

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Speaker 4: out my ankles badly twisted, so I wanted to go

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Speaker 4: to a hospital just to be sacking. I give my statement,

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Speaker 4: press charges, and then the supervisor comes over to me.

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Speaker 1: Goodness, I'm burping today too many lentils.

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Speaker 4: The supervisor was very apologetic and asks if I want

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Speaker 4: anything from the store for free as compensation for this?

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Speaker 1: Does that give me the whole thing for free?

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Speaker 2: Bro?

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Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, I need a freeze cart man free.

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Speaker 1: Cart I want I want?

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Speaker 3: You know what I want?

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Speaker 4: If we're going Christmas themed, I want a legit like

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Speaker 4: horse carriage Santa sleigh stock Yeah yeah, like where the

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Speaker 4: Giant ones beautiful one thousand dollars minimum.

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Speaker 3: So here's here's what OP told him.

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Speaker 4: All I want is for a the idiot security guard

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Speaker 4: to either be rigorously retrained or fired. He wanted to

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Speaker 4: have her purchases held until she's able to come back,

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Speaker 4: so at least retrieve the items that she came for

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Speaker 4: later because she's being skirted off to the hospital here

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Speaker 4: and see the crazy lady, who, by the way, is

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Speaker 4: now screaming you'll hear from my son.

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Speaker 3: He's a lawyer. Yeah, good luck with that.

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Speaker 4: Okay, that this Karen be banned from the entire chain.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they agreed, agreed.

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Speaker 3: To all the conditions. They were like, this is fair,

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Speaker 3: we'll do it.

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Speaker 4: The security guard who detained me and properly looked horrified,

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Speaker 4: and apparently crazy lady heard that it went deathly pale

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Speaker 4: and fainted right there.

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Speaker 3: Karen just straight up fate. Now whether that was real.

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Speaker 2: Faint or I feel like it's a fake faint, yeahf.

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Speaker 4: So hey, And now I'm sitting in a hospital bed,

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Speaker 4: my ankle in a cast, with hip and knee pain,

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Speaker 4: my elbow bruised, and having to call my grandparents to

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Speaker 4: pick me up.

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Speaker 2: Now the Christmas gift that you would have wanted. I

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Speaker 2: love how like Opie is coming in with such pure

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Speaker 2: intentions like I just want to get some lights from

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Speaker 2: my family, and Karen comes in like Karen maul bumper

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Speaker 2: cart and freaking bumms into the's ankle, breaks it, and

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Speaker 2: that drives to steal everything.

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Speaker 1: Like dude, Christmas, we need.

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Speaker 2: A Christmas miracle, and the miracle should be that Karen

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Speaker 2: should be smited from the earth.

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Speaker 1: Yes, just control all delete amen, brother oh Man.

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Speaker 2: But if you haven't already subscribe, subscribe.

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Speaker 3: That button and we see you next time.

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Speaker 1: See you soon.