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Speaker 1: Hey, welcome backup Burns the inner call Happy.

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Speaker 2: This is the first time I've touched in you all year.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god damn year to.

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Speaker 1: Me touching me in crazy waye tonight because we're switching

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Speaker 1: positions hot and fresh in the kitchen silly podcast, guys. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: I have I am going into twenty twenty five with

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Speaker 1: nothing but delusional positivity. I know last year I went

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Speaker 1: into it with positivity, and god damn it did I

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Speaker 1: get rugburn on my fucking butt from being but fucked

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Speaker 1: from throwing to the.

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Speaker 2: Ground thrown to the ground several times. But also we

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Speaker 2: have to reckon is that simultaneously there's a yin and

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Speaker 2: a yang, so many good things, so many good things,

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Speaker 2: so many great things. That's what I'm leading with this

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Speaker 2: year is positivity. I'm looking for the good things in

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Speaker 2: life and it'll find me. It'll find me. Please fucking

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Speaker 2: find me, good things, please find me.

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Speaker 1: It is so funny being people who like prize our

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Speaker 1: privacy because I feel like when we talk about last

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Speaker 1: year being bad, it can sound so annoying to you, guys.

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Speaker 1: I really don't want it to go unseen that I

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Speaker 1: am so grateful for the life I have, like I

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Speaker 1: genuinely feel so blessed. And I said it in like

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Speaker 1: a few episodes ago, but just no, just no, just

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Speaker 1: just no, just just But the fun part is last year,

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Speaker 1: like I've been feeling like a teenager again in terms

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Speaker 1: of like when things are happening in my personal life.

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Speaker 1: I feel like it motivates me a lot to do

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Speaker 1: creative work, which that you really have.

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Speaker 2: Been drawing, like drawing, writing, all that.

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Speaker 1: Good shob Yeah, it like really puts that pep in

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Speaker 1: my step and it makes me feel alive. But that's

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Speaker 1: because I am mentally ill, and there's just something about

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Speaker 1: a deep sick sadness that makes me feel alive. But

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Speaker 1: that's not the vibe this year live. Wait, should we

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Speaker 1: do our ins and outs to.

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Speaker 2: Start off the end?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yea yeah, do you want me to start? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Should Okay? How should we do it so that we

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Speaker 1: don't like cut each other off? Should we just go

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Speaker 1: down our list and then we could pick ones out?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, we'll go down our list fully, But I

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Speaker 2: mean also just chime in, Like we'll just chime in

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Speaker 2: and it'll be fine, because love is what interrupting exactly. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I just have Okay, so this is what I have.

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Speaker 2: I have what are we leaving in twenty twenty five?

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Speaker 2: I have my resolutions and then I just deleted all

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Speaker 2: of them. Yeah, I have resolutions. What we're leaving in

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Speaker 2: trend forecasting? So should I just do what are we

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Speaker 2: leaving in twenty twenty five?

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Speaker 1: Because I only have ins and outs?

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Speaker 2: Okay, so in twenty twenty five, we're leaving heart palpitations. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: those are canceled. They're out. Like I'm done feeling my

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Speaker 2: heart skip three beats and thinking I'm gonna have a

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Speaker 2: heart vape.

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Speaker 1: You don't vapor.

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Speaker 2: I know, it's got to be some other shit, bro,

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Speaker 2: it's got to be some other shit.

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Speaker 1: I'm stopping vaping this year. I am, like, genuinely committed

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Speaker 1: to it. My puff bar died yesterday on the first,

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Speaker 1: and I told myself I was gonna stop. I had

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Speaker 1: a very stressful.

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Speaker 2: We Yeah, like I really can't get into I cannot

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Speaker 2: get into it. I'm sorry for cutting you off, but

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Speaker 2: my life has been a living fucking hell for the

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Speaker 2: last week. So Hasenya's not spilling her tea, not spilling

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Speaker 2: my tea. But just know, these holidays were fucking scary.

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Speaker 2: Fucking boots. They were not a vibe at all. Like,

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Speaker 2: I'm so glad I spent it with my family and

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Speaker 2: I love my parents and my family to have a

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Speaker 2: family to go back to. Oh my god, I'm liter

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Speaker 2: gonna start crying. Imagine I just start crying for the

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Speaker 2: first time over all the shit. Now I've been y'all

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Speaker 2: the shit going on. I have been internalizing and been

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Speaker 2: laughing at it for far too fucking long, and it

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Speaker 2: is not funny.

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Speaker 1: I get the point where it's not fun.

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Speaker 2: It's like so unhealthy for me to like process the process,

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Speaker 2: process it this way. But like we're just gonna keep laughing.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna keep shoving it down until we have some

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Speaker 2: time away so I can fucking cry about all the

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Speaker 2: bullshit going on in my goddamn life. But just know

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Speaker 2: we in this together. But heart palpitations out, heart competitions

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Speaker 2: are out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, puff bars out. I don't think I'm gonna buy

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Speaker 1: a new one. I do have cigarettes, and this is

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Speaker 1: gonna sound like the craziest thing ever that shit, but

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Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna like smoke a cigarette today and

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Speaker 1: see if it even sparks.

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Speaker 2: Toy, don't smoke a cigarette don't do it because it'll.

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Speaker 1: Spark toy good scene so bad.

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Speaker 2: You just got a cold turkey.

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Speaker 1: That's like, no, I know, I'm gonna buy bunch of

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Speaker 1: toothpicks and stuff because for me, it really is like

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Speaker 1: I bite my nails. I always have something in my mouth,

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Speaker 1: and I just like I'm constantly thinking too much and

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Speaker 1: I like to chew once. If y'all saw the tips

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Speaker 1: of my vapes, the teeth marks are crazy. I just

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Speaker 1: chew on.

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Speaker 2: It so like it is so like embarrassing it is.

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Speaker 2: Vaping is like literally just embarrassing. It's just giving like

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Speaker 2: bab bab being like bottle like.

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Speaker 1: Also, I just don't want us to be a part

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Speaker 1: of like the testing generation. I feel like we've already

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Speaker 1: we've already given enough, We've already given enough of our

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Speaker 1: money to that side of the world and tobacco. I

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Speaker 1: feel like if we all are in this together, we

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Speaker 1: can all step away from it. And you know, yeah

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Speaker 1: right yeah.

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Speaker 2: Also, I saw that gen Z is drinking like exponentially

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Speaker 2: less than the generations. The three previous generations like the

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Speaker 2: others are averaging like twenty four billion dollars a year

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Speaker 2: spent on alcohol. Gen Z granted, only like half of

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Speaker 2: us are of age, are only spending three billion dollars

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Speaker 2: a year on alcohol, which is iconic. And if we

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Speaker 2: could kill big alcohol and big tobacco, bitch, that's a vibe.

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Speaker 1: But smoke your weed though, hit that car, I don't. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: smoking the cars are a different conversation.

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Speaker 2: Smoke your weed, do your heroin? Uh, snort smoke or

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Speaker 2: inject meth like either way, like those are those are

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Speaker 2: the good ones? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, but actually cocaine like

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Speaker 2: all of that.

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Speaker 1: My only literally, my only gripe.

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Speaker 2: With weed is I'm joking, by the way, y'all.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, obviously, But my only worry with weed is the

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Speaker 1: memory loss of it all. And I genuinely do because

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Speaker 1: I believe in science. I do believe in the idea

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Speaker 1: of smoking too much before. I think it's like age

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Speaker 1: twenty four or five can really fuck with your memory

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Speaker 1: and your like cognitive ability. So keep that in my

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Speaker 1: But also what I'm not your fucking mom, don't listen

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Speaker 1: to me.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, literally, Okay, so we are leaving eye contact in

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Speaker 2: twenty twenty five. I agree, it's too much. It's too

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Speaker 2: much pressure. It's like there's too many like diagnosed ccs

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Speaker 2: that you can put around it, and I don't fall

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Speaker 2: in any of those fucking categories. It's never that deep.

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Speaker 2: Like if I'm having a conversation and I'm looking this

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Speaker 2: way I'm talking to you, it is not that fucking deep.

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Speaker 2: It's not disrespectful for me not to look in your

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Speaker 2: goddamn eyes. And I don't know why people made it

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Speaker 2: that way, but like, oh my god, Like, it's not

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Speaker 2: that deep. We're leaving eye contact in twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 1: Also, we have to leave it in twenty twenty five

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Speaker 1: because you can't.

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Speaker 2: Talk for twenty twenty six, twenty twenty six or twenty

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Speaker 2: twenty four. Yeah, I'm leaving all of this.

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Speaker 1: You can't tell me like to make eye contact with

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Speaker 1: somebody because I take it too literal and I just

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Speaker 1: stare people.

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Speaker 2: Not Yeah, that's how I like overthink it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I overthinking.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm like, okay, am I like creeping them out?

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Speaker 2: Do they think I'm falling in love with it?

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Speaker 1: And it's also interesting because I feel like with people

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Speaker 1: I'm comfortable with, I don't think about eye contact at all.

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Speaker 1: Like I feel like I stare my friends in the

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Speaker 1: face when I talk to them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like I can't even look at you because we're

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Speaker 2: talking about it, but I'm I think we can like

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Speaker 2: have conversations looking at.

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Speaker 1: Each other, looking at my fucking eyes, bitch.

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Speaker 2: Literally, Okay, we're leaving irony poisoning. In twenty twenty four,

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Speaker 2: Ethylcine said it best. We are in a sincerity epidemic.

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Speaker 2: No one's being sincere anymore. And I am at the

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Speaker 2: forefront of the irony poisoned movement. And if you see

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Speaker 2: me being irony poisoned and making sarcastic remarks and jokes

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Speaker 2: for all of twenty twenty five, don't say shit. I'm trying,

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Speaker 2: and I'm aware of it, and I want to be

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Speaker 2: more sincere with myself and with y'all and with my

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Speaker 2: friends and family. Because I realized I was like really

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Speaker 2: thinking back, and I was like, Okay, I'm in tune

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Speaker 2: with my emotions, Like I know what I'm feeling, and

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Speaker 2: I like control can control my emotion like four years

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Speaker 2: ago that's a different story. But like I can't verbalize

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Speaker 2: like what I'm feeling, like it's it's it's like a

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Speaker 2: weird thing, Like in my head, I know what I'm

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Speaker 2: thinking and I know what I want to say, but

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Speaker 2: then there's like this like blockade like that I just

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Speaker 2: can't get out, and I'm just like, we gotta I

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Speaker 2: gotta work on that shit. And yeah, that starts with

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Speaker 2: being sincere.

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Speaker 1: I feel like you're really good at it when we're

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Speaker 1: talking about things like I never feel like you're not

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Speaker 1: good at just.

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Speaker 2: You know what it is is like comparison is a

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Speaker 2: thief of joy because you are so good at it.

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Speaker 2: Like you are like every time I hear you talk

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Speaker 2: about like your emotions or like talking about your feelings

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Speaker 2: about someone or anything like that, like I'm like, Damn,

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Speaker 2: she's really good at Like she's just really in tune

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Speaker 2: with her mind. And even like on the podcast will

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Speaker 2: go on these like tangents and I'm like, damn, she's

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Speaker 2: like just really good at it. And then like I

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Speaker 2: just am sitting next to you and I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm sad because my family, and like that's all I

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Speaker 2: can get out.

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Speaker 1: I really do think I feel like with me, you're

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Speaker 1: very vulnerable, so I wouldn't it. It really is just

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Speaker 1: comparison to the thief of joy. Also, I always try

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Speaker 1: to remind people not only am I batshit crazy and

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Speaker 1: OCD so I can't not think about every single waking

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Speaker 1: move I make. But I've had six, i think now

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Speaker 1: seven years of consistent therapy, so it really is I

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Speaker 1: I doing that once a week. I tell that to everybody.

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Speaker 1: I was talking to my sister and she was talking

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Speaker 1: about how she has such a hard time verbalizing how

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Speaker 1: she feels, but she knows how she feels. It's very

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Speaker 1: similar to how you'd say. But just like my sister,

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Speaker 1: like when she talks, I'm I'm like, no, you don't

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Speaker 1: have a problem talking. You're really good at expressing yourself.

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Speaker 1: But it is just because I've done so it's like

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Speaker 1: I've taken a class.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like an acting class. Yeah. For emotions, I have

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Speaker 2: a few, but I'm leaving them off because I wrote

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Speaker 2: this list when I was sobbing on the floor of

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Speaker 2: my bathroom. And we'll get into that. We'll get into

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Speaker 2: that in a second. But the last one I'll say

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Speaker 2: is unmarrented guilt. I feel like I am a very

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Speaker 2: guilty person for things that I had nothing involved with,

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Speaker 2: or like just I feel like I carry around a

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Speaker 2: lot of guilt for things that literally do not matter

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Speaker 2: or that I had no involvement with, and I am

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Speaker 2: just leaving that in twenty twenty four, I am living

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Speaker 2: a guilt free lifestyle. I'm moving on. Like I'm apologizing

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Speaker 2: if I did do wrong, but like I'm not holding

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Speaker 2: that guilt over me, and there will be no more shame,

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Speaker 2: no more shame, no more shame.

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Speaker 1: You know what's funny is my top tour admitting your

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Speaker 1: annoying slash wrong and vulnerability, which I feel like kind

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Speaker 1: of playing that just being annoying and my like the

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Speaker 1: way I wrote it, but it really is that just

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Speaker 1: if I'm wrong, I am wrong. I feel like I've

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Speaker 1: started to realize because I am a people pleaser through

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Speaker 1: and through, and that is such a selfish and self

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Speaker 1: absorbed act. I don't think I do it that way

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Speaker 1: on purpose, but it does get to a point where

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Speaker 1: it's okay, all of these things and all of my

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Speaker 1: guilt comes back to me and how I feel like

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be perceived for this, Like a ego said, yeah,

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Speaker 1: so it's such an ego thing, and I feel like

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Speaker 1: it really didn't start as that it comes from our

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Speaker 1: fucking childhood and like being like the younger or like

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Speaker 1: middle siblings whatever, whatever. But I feel that I can carry. Literally,

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Speaker 1: I will have nothing to do with some shit, and

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Speaker 1: I will say sorry eighteen million times.

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Speaker 2: You gotta stop apologize.

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Speaker 1: I say sorry. Oh, I give out sorries like I'm

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Speaker 1: mister Beast, given out fucking one hundred chocolate. Yeah, like

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Speaker 1: I'm given out feasts.

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Speaker 2: Bitch. Oh my god, I fled out. I found out

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Speaker 2: mister Beast received millions of taxpayer dollars from the Pentagon

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Speaker 2: to get kids to fucking enlist in the goddamn military

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Speaker 2: because we are in a military crisis, like because no

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Speaker 2: one wants to fight a fucking war. Like no, like

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Speaker 2: everyone is just like over, okay whatever, because what the fuck.

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Speaker 1: Does that have to do with me. I don't even

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Speaker 1: believe in the shit y'all are trying to put me

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Speaker 1: at war for like literally, leave those people alone, Leave

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Speaker 1: those people the fuck alone, sing me off. I want

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Speaker 1: to throw like I think an inn for this year

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Speaker 1: is throwing tomatoes. We need to bring back like I

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Speaker 1: feel like so much of our society is reversing into

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Speaker 1: these crazy ideas that feel very old school. So okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna bring back the old school retaliation and I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna start y'all better start to try to get getting tomatos.

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Speaker 2: Bitches are getting tomatoes and stones, like we're gonna start

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Speaker 2: stoning people. We like, we'll throw tomatoes at people where

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Speaker 2: we're like this guy fucking stinks, but we'll throw stones

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Speaker 2: at people that commit heinous crimes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think mister bees is getting a tomato with

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Speaker 1: a rock inserted in it.

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Speaker 2: So like a dirt dog a dirt dirt clog. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so it's like not gonna cause permanent damage. There may

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Speaker 2: be a cut. Have ever told you about my dirt

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Speaker 2: clog fight era?

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna I'm not gonna lie. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what the fuck a dirt clog is.

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Speaker 2: It's just like a really hard compacted mass of dirt,

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Speaker 2: Like it gets wet and it turns into like almost

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Speaker 2: a stone where you can pick up a clot of dirt.

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Speaker 2: And we would on recess. We found a big pile

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Speaker 2: of them, like for like three days, and we would

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Speaker 2: just have like wars where we kept throwing them at

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Speaker 2: each other and they would hit you and like hurt

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Speaker 2: a little bit, but they would burst into dust and

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Speaker 2: it was just like really fun. Well, one day a

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Speaker 2: kid accidentally picked up a literal stone and launched at

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Speaker 2: a kid and gashed his fucking forehead open, and no

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Speaker 2: one like the parents of the kid that had his

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Speaker 2: forehead gashed open, We're like, what are I saying? Fucking charges?

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Speaker 2: But the kid was like mom, like that's gonna make

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Speaker 2: me so fucking lame, Like that made me a loser.

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Speaker 2: So nothing happened. But yeah, I was almost almost a

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Speaker 2: kid that threw the stone, the first stone at the third.

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Speaker 1: Stone, the first stone at Grandbury Brook stone wall.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, brick wall, brickwall. Okay, I'll say my other ones,

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Speaker 2: but just know that these are back. No, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: you're good. These are good conversations. We're leaving showering in

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Speaker 2: twenty twenty four.

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Speaker 1: Like, are you gonna substitute it with something?

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Speaker 2: No? I think I think our human bodies were not

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Speaker 2: meant to be showered. And I mean I already left

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Speaker 2: it in twenty twenty three, but I'm saying everybody else

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Speaker 2: is going to start joining. I literally think the only

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Speaker 2: time I quote unquote showered last year was when we

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Speaker 2: went to the river. I guess I went to the

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Speaker 2: ocean with Mason and Zamar and swim like it.

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Speaker 1: But does that s like no, because you're not using soap,

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Speaker 1: so it's secondly not a shower. You're just like getting wet.

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Speaker 1: I'm confused, Like you you go in the bathroom all

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Speaker 1: the time.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I just hang out in there. True, I know. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I make it seem like I'm showering. I'll maybe wash

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Speaker 2: my hands because we're also leaving that in twenty twenty

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Speaker 2: two where I left it like washing it.

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Speaker 1: But there's like like sicknesses and stuff going around.

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Speaker 2: That's why I'm building my immune system bare.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, honestly I feel that. I feel that. Also,

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Speaker 1: I just realized I couldn't cut this off if it's

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Speaker 1: like too much. But it's not even it literally has

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Speaker 1: no details to it. I've realized because both of us

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Speaker 1: love hanging out in the bathroom, and I genuinely think

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Speaker 1: we like hanging out in the bathroom so much because

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Speaker 1: we both grew up in huge families that we had

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Speaker 1: to share all these spaces and the bathroom was the

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Speaker 1: only place you got to be fully alone. Because what

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Speaker 1: I was just looking at you and thinking about in

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Speaker 1: the bathroom, I was like, I don't do that, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, wait, yes I do. Every night when

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Speaker 1: I get ready for bed, I am in there for

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Speaker 1: like two fucking hours.

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Speaker 2: It's chilling, it's a vibe. It was stairs.

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Speaker 1: Love being in there.

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Speaker 2: It was the stairs. And oh, best believe.

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Speaker 1: Under the table? Were you under the table?

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Speaker 2: Oh no, that's weird.

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Speaker 1: I was hanging out under the dining room table because

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Speaker 1: we had this table. All the chairs would block it

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Speaker 1: and there was this little center area with a glass

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Speaker 1: piece that would shine light in there, and I would

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Speaker 1: just literally I would bring Clay under there, I would

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Speaker 1: bring shit under there, and I would hang out under there.

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Speaker 1: And I have the best memory from when I was

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Speaker 1: a kid during like the house the fridge is about

347
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Speaker 1: to explode. At the first house I lived in, we

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Speaker 1: had these huge windows in the living room and it

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00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:00,920
Speaker 1: was a crazy thunderstorm and I was under the table

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Speaker 1: like I had an iPod touch. I was like fourteen.

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Speaker 1: I was under the table and Orange is the New

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Speaker 1: Black Wow just came out and I was having that,

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Speaker 1: watching that and playing with Clay, and I remember like

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Speaker 1: going to the kitchen and like putting it to bake

355
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Speaker 1: and going back under the table and waiting. Also, actually,

356
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Speaker 1: before I forget, I almost set my fucking parents' house

357
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Speaker 1: on fire in Miami because my dumb high ass was

358
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Speaker 1: like playing with clay with my siblings, which was so amazing.

359
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,600
Speaker 1: Loved it so much. Made the cutest character. I made

360
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Speaker 1: that thing we've been working on. I made it at

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Speaker 1: a clane and it was really good.

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Speaker 2: Do you have pictures of it? No?

363
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Speaker 1: Because I put it in the air fryer instead of

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Speaker 1: the oven, because I was like same different. I was like,

365
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Speaker 1: same thing, bitch. I. Natalie came in the room and

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Speaker 1: Sabrina was there, and she came in the room and

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Speaker 1: she goes, there's a lot of smoke in the house.

368
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Speaker 1: Mind you. No one else noticed. My brother is sitting

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Speaker 1: in the living room literally dinner. And I had to

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Speaker 1: go and run and open all the windows and fan

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Speaker 1: out the house. And I went and told my dad

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Speaker 1: and he just looked at me. He was like, you

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Speaker 1: were so dumb, and I was like, yes, we know.

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Speaker 1: And then he was like, did you get the smoke on?

375
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Speaker 1: I was like no, and he was like okay, and

376
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Speaker 1: he got up and he just started.

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Speaker 2: Doing You mentioned Oranges a New Black, And I don't

378
00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,600
Speaker 2: think that show gets the credit it deserves for making

379
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:15,520
Speaker 2: Netflix what it is today, because that single handedly changed

380
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Speaker 2: the trajectory of Netflix forever. Like they were making like

381
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Speaker 2: little dinky shows. I think they had Who Was the Murderer?

382
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:25,520
Speaker 2: That like docuseries or whatever making a murderer. Yeah, but

383
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:28,680
Speaker 2: like Oranges and New Black really revolutionized I mean streaming

384
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Speaker 2: in general, which I don't know if that's a good

385
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Speaker 2: thing or a bad thing. But it's really convenient. But

386
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Speaker 2: it also costs so much money.

387
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:37,320
Speaker 1: Also, it's yeah, it's more expensive than cable. I miss cable,

388
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Speaker 1: Like I genuinely I don't like decision making. It's we're

389
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Speaker 1: all being played like pawns, Like I don't I I

390
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:45,560
Speaker 1: guess actually it's like a very sheep mentality to just

391
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Speaker 1: want decisions made for me. But I don't give a fuck.

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Speaker 1: Why do I have to think about what to watch? Sorry,

393
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Speaker 1: I keep going because I'm like literally gonna no, you're.

394
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Speaker 2: Good, You're good. So my other one was uh, not crying.

395
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Speaker 2: I don't cry enough. We're leaving that. In twenty twenty four,

396
00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:01,840
Speaker 2: I'm going to be an emotional baby. I'm going to

397
00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:03,800
Speaker 2: be crying all the time. Yeah, trying to cry.

398
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:05,480
Speaker 1: I can't be the only girl crying.

399
00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:07,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, And also I feel like it is like a

400
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,840
Speaker 2: really useful skill to have to be able to cry.

401
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:18,000
Speaker 2: But just just manipulate, malipolate, manipulate. Okay, then we're leaving

402
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,600
Speaker 2: crushes in twenty twenty four. But I redacted that one

403
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:23,800
Speaker 2: because I wrote this when I was crying on the

404
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:27,359
Speaker 2: floor of the bathroom. But I got a text back,

405
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:31,000
Speaker 2: so good looking up, we're cooking. But I'll get into

406
00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:33,119
Speaker 2: all of that after's.

407
00:19:32,359 --> 00:19:35,640
Speaker 1: Looks my ends. My ends already said the first two,

408
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:40,120
Speaker 1: admitting your annoying slash wrong vulnerability, not caring about text backs,

409
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:44,119
Speaker 1: which is crazy. Said that, but I mainly meant that

410
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:45,800
Speaker 1: because I'm sorry. I'm not a good texterer.

411
00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,240
Speaker 2: It's never that's only for you.

412
00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:48,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's never going to happen.

413
00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:51,439
Speaker 2: Please know I can I show you the way we text.

414
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,560
Speaker 2: I'll show you later. But like you tell me if

415
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 2: I'm like overreading things, No, it is bad.

416
00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:57,720
Speaker 1: Every time I open a text with anybody I love,

417
00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:01,159
Speaker 1: I'm like, holy shit, I suck dick and balls. But

418
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,280
Speaker 1: I just can't you know what it is too, It's like,

419
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:07,960
Speaker 1: this is so annoying, But I genuinely I have decided

420
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:11,920
Speaker 1: I like giving so much time and attention to someone,

421
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,679
Speaker 1: and I feel like text is a barrier. I can't

422
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 1: be fully like, I can't be as fast enough because

423
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,399
Speaker 1: if you look at our texts or like me and

424
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,800
Speaker 1: Oryan's text and our group tech text, we're all just

425
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,040
Speaker 1: talking at the same time, like we're not really replying

426
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:25,879
Speaker 1: to each other because the way we all talk is

427
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:27,359
Speaker 1: we like to just be in each other's face and

428
00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:29,040
Speaker 1: I'm like, blah blah blah blah blah. I can't do

429
00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,679
Speaker 1: that over text. And if I see you in person

430
00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:34,879
Speaker 1: and you're my friend and I am fully present, you

431
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:36,520
Speaker 1: should know I love you. A textback is not going

432
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:37,040
Speaker 1: to change that.

433
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:40,159
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a good one, and I need to also

434
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 2: get on that wavelength.

435
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:46,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, I just like I feel like also being a

436
00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:49,200
Speaker 1: bad text backer or whatever, being bad at replying to

437
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,760
Speaker 1: text also is like remove the anxiety. I don't really

438
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 1: care that much when someone doesn't text me back because

439
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:55,880
Speaker 1: I don't even remember I send the text. If I'm

440
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,040
Speaker 1: being honest, like I send a text and I leave

441
00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:00,520
Speaker 1: the app and I'm just like living in my own world,

442
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 1: and then I'll be like, oh shit, that person ever

443
00:21:02,119 --> 00:21:04,320
Speaker 1: responded to me. That's crazy, Like I actually don't give

444
00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:06,480
Speaker 1: a fuck about a text back. I will say crazy

445
00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 1: shit in your text, and I don't give a fuck

446
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:09,679
Speaker 1: if you don't reply because I know you saw it, Like,

447
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:11,560
Speaker 1: because I know I see everything on my phone, So.

448
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:13,800
Speaker 2: I say, that's what drives me insane. I'm like, bitch,

449
00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:16,320
Speaker 2: you saw it and you didn't respond, like because I

450
00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:18,640
Speaker 2: see everything. Like if I don't text you back, it's

451
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 2: not because I didn't see it. I saw it, but

452
00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:22,960
Speaker 2: I was scrolling on TikTok and I don't have the

453
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,879
Speaker 2: capacity and wherewithal to exit the app. Put the energy

454
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:29,560
Speaker 2: into texting you and then sending and then going back

455
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:31,160
Speaker 2: to the video I was watching, Like I just need

456
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,560
Speaker 2: to be in perpetual rot state because if I break

457
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:36,320
Speaker 2: that cycle, bad things happen. I start thinking thoughts, I

458
00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,720
Speaker 2: start having thoughts inside of my head, your own thought. Yeah,

459
00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:40,840
Speaker 2: and I can't have that. I really, I really cannot have.

460
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:42,760
Speaker 1: That's why this year, we're going to dedicate more of

461
00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:45,679
Speaker 1: our free time to using our hands. The idol was it?

462
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:46,840
Speaker 1: The Devil loves idle hands?

463
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:49,199
Speaker 2: Yep. I mean that's one of my resolutions, which I

464
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:50,040
Speaker 2: won't get into yet.

465
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:54,679
Speaker 1: Making coffee at home. I already do this, but I

466
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 1: mainly wanted to say it for y'all, Like, invest in

467
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:01,320
Speaker 1: a little setup. It's like a self care thing I love.

468
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,840
Speaker 1: Like as much as I would love to just lay

469
00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:05,840
Speaker 1: in bed and order a coffee, one I can never

470
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:07,520
Speaker 1: get myself to do it because I'm like, that's awful

471
00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:09,840
Speaker 1: and a waste of time and also a waste of money,

472
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:11,760
Speaker 1: and the idea of somebody going in their car and

473
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:13,440
Speaker 1: getting me a coffee and leaving on my front porch

474
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:16,159
Speaker 1: makes me feel absolutely batshit crazy. But also it's like

475
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:19,280
Speaker 1: a self care ritual if you have the time, make

476
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:21,760
Speaker 1: a coffee at home, like invest in your little setup.

477
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:24,280
Speaker 1: It's like doing your makeup or skincare or whatever the fuck.

478
00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:26,240
Speaker 1: It's like it's a moment to yourself.

479
00:22:26,359 --> 00:22:28,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like I think that's why Mancha also became so.

480
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, because it really it's a rich a ritual. Like

481
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:34,000
Speaker 1: rituals are very important, guys, we need to tap back in.

482
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:35,200
Speaker 1: That's an inn is virtual.

483
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 2: It's like little rituals for yourself, like not like not

484
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:42,159
Speaker 2: like big things, like little like every morning, one of

485
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 2: my rituals is making my beding my.

486
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:48,639
Speaker 1: Sheets, curts, yeah have currents, but like opening my curtains ritual.

487
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 2: It's like I I wake up before everybody else. I

488
00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:53,439
Speaker 2: clean up a little bit like that's a ritual. Like

489
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,000
Speaker 2: little things like that that's so in.

490
00:22:55,320 --> 00:22:57,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, just little things for yourself. You don't have to

491
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:00,680
Speaker 1: do your big one every day. That's like absolutely ridiculous

492
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:05,119
Speaker 1: watching the movies your friends recommend, but I have Wow,

493
00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 1: I have to immediately follow that up with one of

494
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:10,639
Speaker 1: my outs, which is recommending movies you already went to

495
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:12,639
Speaker 1: see in a theater without me and you didn't invite me.

496
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 2: Okay, that is also for me too, Yeah, because I

497
00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 2: I didn't get invited. Actually, granted I was in either

498
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,600
Speaker 2: other countries or states, but y'all saw all of the

499
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:28,639
Speaker 2: major motion pictures without me, and I'll never see Barbie. Barbie, bitch.

500
00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:31,239
Speaker 1: I'm telling you you're not missing shit with Barbie like

501
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:35,960
Speaker 1: I am. I love saying that shit. Wait, because y'all

502
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,320
Speaker 1: saw something without.

503
00:23:37,119 --> 00:23:39,280
Speaker 2: Me too, but you were in another state.

504
00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:40,520
Speaker 1: You see hell is shit without me?

505
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:43,960
Speaker 2: You see hell this shit without me? Should we kiss? Nope,

506
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:52,639
Speaker 2: I'm gonna shove this as so you hit me and

507
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:56,640
Speaker 2: then you say you're gonna shove a banana up my ass.

508
00:23:55,480 --> 00:24:00,680
Speaker 1: And a new end too is playing like not enough

509
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:03,760
Speaker 1: friends want to just play like I'm taking instpo from Rain.

510
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 1: She's really good. At getting her friends together and playing

511
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:08,280
Speaker 1: games and just not watching TV. When I go to

512
00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:10,240
Speaker 1: Rain's house, it's rare. We sit down and just like

513
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,120
Speaker 1: watch TV. We just play with her cat. We play

514
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,720
Speaker 1: with little things we get like little kids to make

515
00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:18,200
Speaker 1: fucking what's it called? Those like pop and cook in

516
00:24:18,359 --> 00:24:20,160
Speaker 1: Like I want to do more of that. I want

517
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 1: to do more playing with my friends. I want to

518
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:24,680
Speaker 1: go run around with my friends. I want to find

519
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 1: a field and like chase each other and play in

520
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: person like I want to play. And the second thing

521
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:32,639
Speaker 1: is that, like that is dressing up and being loud.

522
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,800
Speaker 1: I feel like I really like my style. It's become

523
00:24:35,880 --> 00:24:38,000
Speaker 1: very diluted and basic. But I think it's just been

524
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,600
Speaker 1: easier for me, especially with how busy I've gotten to

525
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:42,760
Speaker 1: be more simple. But I want to be more playful

526
00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 1: with my outfits. I want to be like more of

527
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:49,600
Speaker 1: a presence. And that's a whole other thing. But yeah,

528
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:52,960
Speaker 1: I just want to have more fun with my expression,

529
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 1: with my clothing and my hair and things like that.

530
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,880
Speaker 1: And I'm trying to figure it out. In you actually

531
00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,439
Speaker 1: like kind of did I'm like, oh damn, Like getting

532
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:04,840
Speaker 1: a fun haircut is a thing, Like it's a good thing.

533
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,000
Speaker 2: My rat tail. I need it rebraided.

534
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:08,720
Speaker 1: The rubber ram follow.

535
00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:10,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, this has been braided.

536
00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:12,800
Speaker 1: Oh you have to take that out and wash it

537
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,679
Speaker 1: because you probably have like scout build up at the

538
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:15,440
Speaker 1: base of that brain.

539
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:17,639
Speaker 2: Oh no, I like get up in there and it's

540
00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 2: really loose at the tip.

541
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,480
Speaker 1: Oh that's it, And that's honestly it for my ends,

542
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,240
Speaker 1: like I have other ends, but there are more, I

543
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:30,960
Speaker 1: guess resolutions for myself. Should we do outs?

544
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:33,400
Speaker 2: I did my ins and outs at the same time.

545
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:37,680
Speaker 1: Oh shit, I'm dumb as fuck. Outs is doom scrolling

546
00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:39,720
Speaker 1: because I really want to get off my phone this year.

547
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,040
Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't agree with the idea that

548
00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:44,280
Speaker 1: the Internet and everything is the worst thing you can

549
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:46,199
Speaker 1: do to your brain, because I genuinely do think it's

550
00:25:46,240 --> 00:25:49,719
Speaker 1: such a good form of connection, information, whatever. But I

551
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:52,199
Speaker 1: do think I have an addiction to my phone like

552
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,880
Speaker 1: most of us do. And if I'm sitting around anxious,

553
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:57,680
Speaker 1: I'm like I could be doing something. I just want

554
00:25:57,680 --> 00:25:59,680
Speaker 1: to move my mind somewhere else, even if that means

555
00:25:59,680 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 1: to a bigger screen and watching a movie that will

556
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:03,040
Speaker 1: be done.

557
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:06,520
Speaker 2: Yeah. One of my resolutions this year is when I'm bored.

558
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:11,320
Speaker 2: I'll read when I'm overwhelmed, allrite or draw instead of

559
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:15,600
Speaker 2: scrolling on iPhone. But like you were saying, I'm a

560
00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:19,320
Speaker 2: huge proponent of the iPhone, Like there's kal phone, crack phone.

561
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,960
Speaker 2: I want crackphone. Give it to me, let me utilize

562
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,800
Speaker 2: it to the greatest of its abilities, like I want

563
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:28,479
Speaker 2: it to consume ninety percent of my day. But at

564
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 2: the same time, I know I have life to live

565
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:34,119
Speaker 2: because I'll only be seventeen ones.

566
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,239
Speaker 1: Oh but I thought, I'm so confused. I thought you

567
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:39,840
Speaker 1: were eighteen.

568
00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:44,840
Speaker 2: Wait, let me do the math.

569
00:26:45,520 --> 00:26:47,000
Speaker 1: So what year were you born?

570
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:54,280
Speaker 2: Twenty ten? Damn, so I'm only fifteen. You're so double.

571
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:59,919
Speaker 2: I'm fourteen in like nine months, So I guess I'm like, technically, sixteen.

572
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:04,240
Speaker 1: Are so annoying? Another out is holding your pee. That's

573
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:06,280
Speaker 1: kind of just to me. I have this really bad habit,

574
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,439
Speaker 1: especially because I'm always with my friends. I will just

575
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 1: I hate leaving a room from you guys, because leaving

576
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,680
Speaker 1: a room from the people I know means you miss

577
00:27:16,000 --> 00:27:19,240
Speaker 1: thirty percent of a conversation and you come back and everything.

578
00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:20,200
Speaker 2: Is an inside joke with it.

579
00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:24,639
Speaker 1: Everything has happened. There's something being repeated that you don't understand,

580
00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:28,040
Speaker 1: but I really don't want a uti avoiding the doctors

581
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,080
Speaker 1: another out. I want to go to the doctor. Yes,

582
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 1: slug enough to have access to doctors, and I want

583
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:35,359
Speaker 1: to use it. I want to take.

584
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,080
Speaker 2: Let's get those let's get those executive physicals. Y'ah. There's

585
00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:43,680
Speaker 2: these physicals. Granted they're so fucking expensive, like ridiculously expensive,

586
00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:45,199
Speaker 2: but you can do them in Mexico City for like

587
00:27:45,240 --> 00:27:49,080
Speaker 2: seven hundred dollars. But there are these physicals where you

588
00:27:49,119 --> 00:27:51,199
Speaker 2: go in and it's like three days of testing.

589
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 1: A STIs just do that because I want to go

590
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:53,440
Speaker 1: back to Mexico.

591
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:55,200
Speaker 2: I love I love Mexico.

592
00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:59,719
Speaker 1: I love I love me. Oh I literally, I'm not playing.

593
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 1: I love me.

594
00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:04,680
Speaker 2: Oh my god, shout out Mexican. It's like, y'all, a

595
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:09,119
Speaker 2: the food is delicious. Y'all's city is Gorgina Grande, Like,

596
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 2: oh my god, I love Mexico so much, and every

597
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:13,840
Speaker 2: time I go back, I'm like, damn, like this might

598
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:15,480
Speaker 2: be my favorite city I've ever been to.

599
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:20,679
Speaker 1: It's so good. Also, I'm sorry, like Latin America is

600
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:25,120
Speaker 1: just goat. I really want to go to this year,

601
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:30,080
Speaker 1: but my family is like boring as fuck their Doerhovah's witnesses,

602
00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:33,040
Speaker 1: like I want to go to Hunduras to like go

603
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:34,399
Speaker 1: do the shit I did as a kid, which is

604
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:36,280
Speaker 1: like go play in the river, but my great grandma's

605
00:28:36,359 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 1: dead and she's the one who lives by the river.

606
00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 1: But like what, I don't want to go to church,

607
00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:45,440
Speaker 1: but maybe Loki would be interesting because oh my god,

608
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,680
Speaker 1: when I was in Honduras when I was a kid.

609
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:50,600
Speaker 1: Don't get on me for my pronunciation. I'm sorry, I like,

610
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:53,480
Speaker 1: I can't, I can't do it. When I would go

611
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 1: as a kid, they would drag my ass to church

612
00:28:55,960 --> 00:29:00,280
Speaker 1: three times a week. That's I don't want to go well,

613
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:02,080
Speaker 1: And you know what I would always do. My cheek

614
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,480
Speaker 1: code for getting the fuck out of the church is

615
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:07,400
Speaker 1: I'd be like, I'm thirsty. I'm thirsty, So my mom

616
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,640
Speaker 1: would give me money or my grandma would give me money,

617
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,320
Speaker 1: and I would run outside and go find a lady

618
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,360
Speaker 1: who was selling water, because they sell water in Math,

619
00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:15,720
Speaker 1: and I would just like go and sneak into my

620
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:19,240
Speaker 1: aunt's truck, into her backbed, and I would lay there

621
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:21,640
Speaker 1: and like drink my water until my grandma came out

622
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 1: looking for me. She'd be like, yeah, because she thought

623
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:25,640
Speaker 1: I got kidnapped. But really I was hiding because I

624
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:26,680
Speaker 1: didn't want to be in fucking church.

625
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:29,280
Speaker 2: We listen and we don't judge. Every time I find

626
00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 2: money in the washing machine, it becomes mine. Oh, same,

627
00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:36,440
Speaker 2: it's mine every time. That's just that's something I thought about.

628
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 2: And then I don't know why I just said that,

629
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:41,360
Speaker 2: But you.

630
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 1: Just had to admit your sins. That's the party you're in.

631
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:44,320
Speaker 1: You're being vulnerable.

632
00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:45,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm being authentic.

633
00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:48,880
Speaker 1: My other out is staying up too late. I am

634
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 1: a night owl by nature. I want to get better

635
00:29:53,120 --> 00:29:55,800
Speaker 1: actually sleeping. I just want to get my sleep in.

636
00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:57,680
Speaker 2: Tune because I'm a really did you need that?

637
00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:00,520
Speaker 1: I'm like a heavy sleeper, but I sleep I don't

638
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:02,600
Speaker 1: really invest in like good pillows and stuff, so I

639
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:04,520
Speaker 1: have like really bad back problems.

640
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 2: Like I'm so excited to get a new fucking bed.

641
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,760
Speaker 1: I know, I just want to, like I want to

642
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 1: just splurge. And also with that not staying up too late,

643
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,960
Speaker 1: I want to do more sleepovers in bed, which is

644
00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 1: why we're we're planning on getting bigger beds so we

645
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:21,680
Speaker 1: can sleep with our friends. And that also is partially

646
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:23,600
Speaker 1: with the end, but I don't want to stay up

647
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,360
Speaker 1: too late with y'all, Like I want to be better

648
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:27,920
Speaker 1: at us waking up and having a day together. Yeah,

649
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 1: and then we're going to bed early together.

650
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 2: But we always have nights, we never have days. But

651
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 2: we're also like we always say like, Okay, we're gonna

652
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:35,920
Speaker 2: go do this, this and this tomorrow, and then it

653
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 2: like comes time and more like working or some shit.

654
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,760
Speaker 2: I know that's what's something we need. I need a schedule,

655
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:42,680
Speaker 2: but sorry, keep going.

656
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 1: Okay, this, okay, I really have to explain this one.

657
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:51,200
Speaker 1: This isn't out public massandry is out. But let me explain.

658
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:53,360
Speaker 2: Mmm, this is interesting.

659
00:30:53,440 --> 00:31:00,600
Speaker 1: Let me explain. I will always hate men, pointblank period always.

660
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:02,680
Speaker 1: Do I have men in my life?

661
00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:03,040
Speaker 2: I love?

662
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:08,240
Speaker 1: Yes, there is a balance. Am I the strongest messandras No,

663
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: not by any means, because yes, I saw a baby.

664
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:15,720
Speaker 2: Girl and you're straight again.

665
00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:22,840
Speaker 1: Let's just say, don't let me in that room. Don't

666
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:23,760
Speaker 1: let me in that room.

667
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:28,440
Speaker 2: I literally that's how I'm like, don't let me in

668
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:30,720
Speaker 2: that goddamn coffin because I will be eating the maggots

669
00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:37,240
Speaker 2: off his dick. Oh my god, true, his rotten fucking

670
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:42,000
Speaker 2: member is a member.

671
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:45,800
Speaker 1: No, it is a member. It's a lot. But I'm like,

672
00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 1: I just think men are too aware of it, and

673
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:57,040
Speaker 1: I am tired of them getting to go online and

674
00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:59,640
Speaker 1: say the right things. Are just in person say the

675
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:03,760
Speaker 1: right things. Yeah, I feel like straight men are just

676
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 1: seeing that and they're getting to manipulate it. If you're

677
00:32:06,440 --> 00:32:07,800
Speaker 1: a straight man listening to this.

678
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 2: Be you you are, be you yea be who you are.

679
00:32:11,720 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 1: I'm not hating on you publicly, but yeah, I I

680
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:20,440
Speaker 1: feel like I can't even go into detail, like just

681
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: the girls are together, no, actually see even saying that, Like,

682
00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:27,960
Speaker 1: I just don't want to be a public messandrist because

683
00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:31,920
Speaker 1: I like the shock value of men coming up to

684
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:37,040
Speaker 1: me and then me being like, but just know that

685
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:39,440
Speaker 1: there is a rhyme and a reason. I just don't

686
00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 1: want men to know what we're up to, Like men

687
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:44,160
Speaker 1: shouldn't have the right like they we have to start

688
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 1: treating it like a secret society.

689
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,400
Speaker 2: The Illuminati and massandry.

690
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's that. And then my last out is mystery.

691
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:57,600
Speaker 2: I'm enough, it's done, it's tried, it's boring.

692
00:32:57,360 --> 00:32:59,920
Speaker 1: It's over, Like yeah, like enough with the mystery of

693
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,400
Speaker 1: it all. I think I've been thinking a lot about

694
00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:05,600
Speaker 1: my Yes, literally, I've been thinking a lot about my

695
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:08,880
Speaker 1: age and my perceptions of what it means to be

696
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,480
Speaker 1: a woman. I kind of went on a tangent like

697
00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 1: this on the live stream the other day, But just

698
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:16,040
Speaker 1: my ideas of what it means to be a woman,

699
00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:18,560
Speaker 1: what it means to grow into my womanhood, and like

700
00:33:18,640 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 1: how I am perceived in public and all these things.

701
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:22,200
Speaker 1: And I think I had a lot of ideas of

702
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:25,120
Speaker 1: when I grew older, I would become more calm and

703
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:28,000
Speaker 1: within myself and be a little more like restrictive of

704
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 1: the things I say and all these things. No, no,

705
00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:34,600
Speaker 1: because that is a ploy to get my ass to

706
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 1: shut up. And one thing you're never gonna do is

707
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 1: have me fucking shut That literally.

708
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:40,680
Speaker 2: Is the patriarchy like locking you down.

709
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 1: No, that's what I feel like, because I'm like, oh, yeah,

710
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:45,719
Speaker 1: when I'm older, I'll be just like this sexy woman

711
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:50,160
Speaker 1: and like people will turn their heads. Actually, no, I

712
00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:58,480
Speaker 1: realize that I don't like. I literally don't. I don't

713
00:33:58,520 --> 00:34:00,600
Speaker 1: want to shut up. I don't like, yeah, I want

714
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:02,760
Speaker 1: people to fear me, and I don't give a fuck.

715
00:34:02,840 --> 00:34:06,800
Speaker 2: Actually, just don't don't. It is scary. I am being

716
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:13,920
Speaker 2: perceived as scary. But I'll tell you later. Okay. So, uh,

717
00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:17,239
Speaker 2: trend forecasting for twenty twenty five. I came up with

718
00:34:17,280 --> 00:34:22,440
Speaker 2: a few. Changing underwear daily is going to be in

719
00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:23,520
Speaker 2: for twenty twenty five.

720
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:25,520
Speaker 1: Like the thing is, you keep saying a lot of

721
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 1: hygiene based things that actually make me a bit worried

722
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:28,399
Speaker 1: for you.

723
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:32,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, you get like I feel like all of us,

724
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:36,680
Speaker 2: we you, like everyone involved, on my on your soul,

725
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:40,200
Speaker 2: we're all like not changing underwear daily. Sometimes we go

726
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:41,839
Speaker 2: four or five days without it, and that's just like

727
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:45,319
Speaker 2: saving them all on your soul, on your soul, we

728
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:47,840
Speaker 2: we all of us are not changing.

729
00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,160
Speaker 1: You're like manipulating me. Now, I'm really thinking about my

730
00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:51,160
Speaker 1: underwear consumption.

731
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:53,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're you're watching it too much. You're wasting too

732
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 2: much water. Like did you know the amount of water

733
00:34:55,120 --> 00:34:57,240
Speaker 2: in a washing machine could fill an Olympic size pool

734
00:34:57,400 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 2: one wash.

735
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,399
Speaker 1: That can't be true, that can be sure.

736
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:02,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, so every time you wash your clothes, you're filling

737
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:03,319
Speaker 2: an Olympics ice swimming pool.

738
00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:05,279
Speaker 1: Like, I actually can't tell if you're lying to me.

739
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:09,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm being dead serious, So like just keep in mind.

740
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 1: Yes, see, you can't say anything to me because I

741
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:14,759
Speaker 1: believe anything anyone says.

742
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:17,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, So changing your underwear daily is and I feel

743
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:20,160
Speaker 2: like we've taken it too far and we just got

744
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:21,359
Speaker 2: to come back to it.

745
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:27,120
Speaker 1: I don't think we should just banish underwear. Yeah, Like I

746
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:28,279
Speaker 1: I'm low key prog and.

747
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:39,240
Speaker 2: Gray sweatpants on big hairy men. No underwear, Oh my god. Okay.

748
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:41,319
Speaker 2: I feel like sambas are gonna be.

749
00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 1: I feel like jeans are gonna be a vibe jeans.

750
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 2: Jeans why shirt fire men have more fun on the earth? Okay, Okay,

751
00:35:58,360 --> 00:35:59,279
Speaker 2: Cheetah print.

752
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:03,680
Speaker 1: Yours so annoying. I actually was so curious. I was like, damn,

753
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,040
Speaker 1: you wrote trend forecast, Like what are you gonna think

754
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:08,960
Speaker 1: that is how it's gonna be. It's like Bambi print

755
00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:09,600
Speaker 1: is in.

756
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:13,279
Speaker 2: We know it's been in, Nike is gonna be in

757
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,719
Speaker 2: for twenty twenty five. This is a very real one,

758
00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:20,560
Speaker 2: a very authentic one. Sincerity is coming back, loving thy neighbor.

759
00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:24,520
Speaker 2: I feel like we've gone a little too far. Oh

760
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:25,560
Speaker 2: did you get that text too?

761
00:36:25,800 --> 00:36:27,360
Speaker 1: From the transcar transport?

762
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,840
Speaker 2: Oh? No, I got a text while we were recording.

763
00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:34,080
Speaker 2: We haven't chatted for a long time when are you

764
00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:37,399
Speaker 2: free to have a cup of coffee? Who is nice

765
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:43,319
Speaker 2: right now? Send a pic? I'm free now because it's

766
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:43,720
Speaker 2: a bot.

767
00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:47,640
Speaker 1: But wait, wait, what's your actual trend forecast?

768
00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:50,719
Speaker 2: I'm curious, Love thy neighbor, loving thy neighbor. I feel

769
00:36:50,719 --> 00:36:52,439
Speaker 2: like it's gonna come in in a very big way.

770
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:55,800
Speaker 2: Like I feel like we've been doing this like hating

771
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:58,480
Speaker 2: each other thing for like far, far, far too long,

772
00:36:58,520 --> 00:36:59,800
Speaker 2: and I feel like this is the year of you

773
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:04,040
Speaker 2: unity and union and like respecting each other's differences. And

774
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:05,920
Speaker 2: I think it's I think it's gonna happen finally.

775
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, I do want to be less judgmental this year,

776
00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 1: but that's a that don't even.

777
00:37:09,800 --> 00:37:14,800
Speaker 2: Sound right, like a big pig. Internally, I will judge

778
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:21,440
Speaker 2: everything everybody does forward facing. That makes me sound so crazy.

779
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:28,000
Speaker 2: I redact all of that. I reject that energy. I

780
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 2: don't have any real trend forecasts. Like I think I

781
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:39,120
Speaker 2: saw someone say, like sailor wear like clothing. It's really

782
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:41,840
Speaker 2: niche right now, Like I think for like the masses,

783
00:37:41,920 --> 00:37:44,920
Speaker 2: it's gonna be a thing like wearing like sailor hats

784
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:49,160
Speaker 2: and like blue and white collars and like that vibe. Okay,

785
00:37:49,239 --> 00:37:53,000
Speaker 2: so this bot texted me saying, we haven't chatted for

786
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:55,279
Speaker 2: a long time. When are you free to have a

787
00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:57,440
Speaker 2: cup of coffee? I said, who is this? Sinda pick

788
00:37:57,520 --> 00:38:00,480
Speaker 2: I'm free now, I'm Stephanie. You have haven't you saved

789
00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:04,240
Speaker 2: my number friend Julia? And then she sent her picture

790
00:38:04,480 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 2: and then I said, oh, img, high, I don't remember you,

791
00:38:07,320 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 2: but I want to touch your boobs.

792
00:38:10,120 --> 00:38:15,360
Speaker 1: I see also this picture of this girl just on vacation.

793
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:19,040
Speaker 2: I know who is this random girl? Who is Should

794
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:23,640
Speaker 2: we reverse image searches? Yes, zero matches. What if she's real?

795
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:28,280
Speaker 1: There's no way that girl does not What if.

796
00:38:28,120 --> 00:38:33,839
Speaker 2: I literally just like accidentally like sexually a woman? Yeah, say,

797
00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 2: I'm gay. By the way, I just like playing with boobs. Oh,

798
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:47,719
Speaker 2: isn't this my friend Julia's number? No, I'm gay, by

799
00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:53,600
Speaker 2: the way, I just like playing with boobs.

800
00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:55,920
Speaker 1: You're so annoying.

801
00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 2: Okay, I am batshit forucking crazy. I found out over

802
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:06,000
Speaker 2: this Christmas break that there is a part of me

803
00:39:06,360 --> 00:39:10,320
Speaker 2: that I did not know existed, never thought would exist.

804
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 2: And I have gone full blown fucking tweaker psycho like

805
00:39:16,440 --> 00:39:21,719
Speaker 2: like stalker like literally stalker mode like it's and it

806
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:22,319
Speaker 2: got to a.

807
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:25,239
Speaker 1: Point I guess, yeah, you have all that pent up

808
00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:28,040
Speaker 1: energy since you're not somebody who like casually has crushes.

809
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:30,239
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, I have a crush. This is That's

810
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:32,600
Speaker 2: what I'm talking about. I have a Sorry, I don't

811
00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:35,279
Speaker 2: know if you big no that I did. I have

812
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:40,200
Speaker 2: a big, big, fat, nasty crush. And I realized I

813
00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:42,200
Speaker 2: was like, why is it called a crush? Like, why

814
00:39:42,239 --> 00:39:44,840
Speaker 2: is it called the crush? It's because it literally crushes. Yeah,

815
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:46,360
Speaker 2: I never knew that. I just thought it was like

816
00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:50,200
Speaker 2: a silly little name. No, it literally crushes me, y'all.

817
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:53,560
Speaker 2: I literally, like, one night he didn't text me back

818
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,879
Speaker 2: when I like was like asking to hang out, and

819
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 2: literally I went fucking crazy. I found his family. I

820
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:04,600
Speaker 2: found every one of his siblings. I paid thirty dollars

821
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:07,479
Speaker 2: to find his addresses of his old houses. I found

822
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:10,400
Speaker 2: out every location he's ever lived in. I found his

823
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:14,600
Speaker 2: ex boyfriend. Like, I found literally everything you could about

824
00:40:14,600 --> 00:40:17,840
Speaker 2: and made a timeline of events in my notes apps

825
00:40:18,239 --> 00:40:23,120
Speaker 2: of his life. Like, wait, you have notes, I have notes.

826
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,600
Speaker 2: I have notes, Like I'm literally fucking crazy.

827
00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:27,920
Speaker 1: No, it's this great Drew called me. I was in

828
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 1: the middle of talking to my family. He called me.

829
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:32,040
Speaker 1: He was like, oh my God, and because of everything

830
00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:34,480
Speaker 1: that's been happening, I was like, oh Jesus Christ. Okay,

831
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:36,680
Speaker 1: Like I walked away and I ran into my parents'

832
00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:39,040
Speaker 1: bedrooms bathroom, and I was like, what happened? What happened?

833
00:40:39,040 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm fucking crazy. No, you have to tell

834
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:46,320
Speaker 1: them you fucking how you got that information though.

835
00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:53,240
Speaker 2: I paid thirty dollars to subscribe to truthfinder dot com.

836
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:57,239
Speaker 2: I paid thirty dollars, y'all. And then it gets.

837
00:40:57,040 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 1: Worse, I mean to be fair, very very crazy situation

838
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:05,440
Speaker 1: because no social media, got no problem, no social media,

839
00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:07,400
Speaker 1: no Like I.

840
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:09,320
Speaker 2: I did find his Facebook profile from twenty eleven.

841
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:11,839
Speaker 1: But that's what I'm saying. Every time somebody, anybody who

842
00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:16,400
Speaker 1: has a crush that ig is getting ran through tags, followers, bubbah.

843
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:20,320
Speaker 1: But like everything everything, I'm googling your name, I'm googling

844
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:23,520
Speaker 1: your last name, I'm seeing, I am, I'm seeing I

845
00:41:24,640 --> 00:41:28,839
Speaker 1: am seeing everything everywhere, all at once. But that's to

846
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:30,560
Speaker 1: spend thirty dollars. I can't even get on you though,

847
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:32,719
Speaker 1: because I would spend oh I would the amount of

848
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:36,200
Speaker 1: money I would spend to know people's business.

849
00:41:36,320 --> 00:41:39,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was doing really crazy things like I literally

850
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:43,920
Speaker 2: like when on cheeterbuster dot com.

851
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:48,640
Speaker 1: What yeah, why is cheeterbuster?

852
00:41:49,640 --> 00:41:52,120
Speaker 2: You find a picture of them and insert their name

853
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 2: and age and then it'll tell you if they have Tinder.

854
00:41:56,560 --> 00:41:59,760
Speaker 1: That is so funny, drone Cheaterbuster.

855
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:02,600
Speaker 2: Not because I thought he was cheating, but I was

856
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:05,080
Speaker 2: just like, is he like looking to date? Like is

857
00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:08,719
Speaker 2: this possibility? Also kinda he might actually be listening to

858
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 2: this right now, which is also mortifying. But vulnerability vulnerability

859
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,600
Speaker 2: for twenty thirty four, well, I was so down bad.

860
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 2: I literally I'm not gonna say that one. I'm gonna

861
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:24,959
Speaker 2: save that, but this one I will say.

862
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 1: Oh yeah.

863
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:32,360
Speaker 2: I was sitting on the floor of the bathroom, hadn't

864
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:34,640
Speaker 2: texted me back all day. I was like, damn, I

865
00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:36,920
Speaker 2: really like caught feelings and this is like bullshit. And

866
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:40,440
Speaker 2: I was literally crying, like I never cry. I was

867
00:42:40,480 --> 00:42:42,359
Speaker 2: literally crying. But there was a lot of other shit

868
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:44,840
Speaker 2: going on, so it wasn't just that. And I was

869
00:42:44,840 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 2: like journaling in my phone because I was like when

870
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,880
Speaker 2: I'm overwhelmed, all right, like that's like That's what I

871
00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:50,919
Speaker 2: was doing. And I was writing all this shit down

872
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 2: and I was actually being really truthful, which also something

873
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:56,680
Speaker 2: I realized is, bitch, I still like, why do I

874
00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:58,960
Speaker 2: lie when I journal? Like I still like I make

875
00:42:59,000 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 2: shit up when I'm journaling, and I'm like, bitch, this

876
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:02,839
Speaker 2: is just for me, Like literally, I have like an

877
00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:04,000
Speaker 2: actual fucking issue.

878
00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:06,840
Speaker 1: But well, that kind of makes sense because it's I have.

879
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:09,840
Speaker 1: I literally, if you look at my last page of journaling,

880
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,120
Speaker 1: I write about that because.

881
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 2: I wrote about that. Look.

882
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:15,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, cause it's like it's almost like a fear if

883
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 1: you're putting it somewhere, and even the idea and notion

884
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:22,480
Speaker 1: that somebody out there would ever cross a boundary and

885
00:43:22,600 --> 00:43:25,239
Speaker 1: look at that stuff is enough to keep you back

886
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:27,960
Speaker 1: from writing it exactly. And it sucks so bad. I

887
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 1: want to get better at that too, because there's a

888
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:30,640
Speaker 1: lot of stuff.

889
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:33,080
Speaker 2: But there's also it's not like me lying like.

890
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:34,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just feel like I can't write it down.

891
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:37,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like not me lying, it's like me like

892
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:43,759
Speaker 2: just being like like saying what I want to hear,

893
00:43:43,760 --> 00:43:46,040
Speaker 2: if that makes sense. It's like something I find myself

894
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:51,040
Speaker 2: doing specifically with crushes is I'll like make like I'll

895
00:43:51,080 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 2: formulate texts where I get the response I want in return.

896
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:58,719
Speaker 2: Like it's really fucking psychoshit, like, I'll make sure the

897
00:43:58,760 --> 00:44:00,799
Speaker 2: text is like a response that I want to hear.

898
00:44:01,920 --> 00:44:07,600
Speaker 2: I know, genuine like insanity, but bitch, it's some embarrassing.

899
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:10,440
Speaker 2: It's really it's really really jarring. But I was so

900
00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:12,480
Speaker 2: beat up about it, and I was like, I just

901
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:14,240
Speaker 2: need someone to talk to you about this. And everyone

902
00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:20,919
Speaker 2: was asleep. I had a full blown conversation with chat

903
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:26,560
Speaker 2: chept over it co like I wonder if the chat

904
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:31,760
Speaker 2: log saved. I didn't save and I forgot to screen

905
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:38,120
Speaker 2: record it. Literally talked to chatpyat cheap chat GPT and

906
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:40,400
Speaker 2: it was giving me advice and it was giving me

907
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:41,040
Speaker 2: good advice.

908
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:44,000
Speaker 1: Okay, good per because I give bad advice. I was

909
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:46,359
Speaker 1: gonna say, like, I feel bad for Drew because I'm

910
00:44:46,360 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 1: not very helpful during these times. Because I am the

911
00:44:48,719 --> 00:44:53,400
Speaker 1: most forward person ever. Drew has been the butt of

912
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:58,600
Speaker 1: that experience. But if I like someone, I will just

913
00:44:58,719 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 1: literally say it. The thing it's like, oh, I'm talking

914
00:45:01,040 --> 00:45:02,399
Speaker 1: to you because I want to fuck.

915
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:05,800
Speaker 2: No. Literally, the thing is is I'm like, I don't

916
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:09,479
Speaker 2: feel like I'm allowed to like him, if that makes sense,

917
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:12,880
Speaker 2: not because not because like gay or whatever, but because

918
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 2: like we've only hung out for a couple times, and

919
00:45:16,239 --> 00:45:18,239
Speaker 2: I'm like, I feel like if I was like, oh,

920
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 2: like I have a crush on you, like that would

921
00:45:21,640 --> 00:45:24,000
Speaker 2: just be like so jarring and scary. So I'm like,

922
00:45:24,600 --> 00:45:27,520
Speaker 2: what I'm gonna do is just let it rock. And

923
00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 2: then when I go back to Texas and we hang out,

924
00:45:30,880 --> 00:45:33,120
Speaker 2: I feel like three times hanging out is like enough

925
00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:34,959
Speaker 2: to be like, hey, like I really enjoy our time

926
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,000
Speaker 2: that we spend together. Da da da da da da

927
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:37,600
Speaker 2: da da da dah.

928
00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:40,919
Speaker 1: I'm crazy, but not that crazy because the only time

929
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:43,160
Speaker 1: I've ever met someone in person and immediately was like,

930
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:44,560
Speaker 1: oh my god, I have a crush on this person

931
00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:48,040
Speaker 1: was more Yeah, but I withheld that information for a

932
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:50,600
Speaker 1: while because it did make me feel bashit crazy. That's

933
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:53,400
Speaker 1: the crazy part is it's different when you meet someone

934
00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:55,799
Speaker 1: through someone or like a friend and you have a

935
00:45:55,800 --> 00:45:58,879
Speaker 1: crush in that way. When you meet someone random, you're

936
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:02,239
Speaker 1: not expecting to exactly can you have a crush. That

937
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:05,440
Speaker 1: is when the psychosis really kicks in, because it's one

938
00:46:05,480 --> 00:46:07,960
Speaker 1: thing to be searching and find something, but when something

939
00:46:08,080 --> 00:46:12,399
Speaker 1: just lands on your lap, literally, I'm like I need this,

940
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:14,320
Speaker 1: I literally need this. God put it here for me,

941
00:46:14,360 --> 00:46:16,399
Speaker 1: and I'm a little schizophrenic, and I genuinely think God

942
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,319
Speaker 1: put this here for me, like there's no other way,

943
00:46:18,400 --> 00:46:19,919
Speaker 1: like it was meant to happen now, and I want

944
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:22,319
Speaker 1: it now. I love this for you. It makes me

945
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 1: very happy.

946
00:46:23,560 --> 00:46:25,600
Speaker 2: I think he was born in May, and I decided,

947
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:27,759
Speaker 2: if you're a man born in May, you're gay, even

948
00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:29,759
Speaker 2: if you're straight, Like, oh my birthdays May.

949
00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:32,520
Speaker 1: Yeah. All the gay people I know who like even

950
00:46:32,520 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 1: if they're.

951
00:46:33,080 --> 00:46:35,080
Speaker 2: Like, if a straight man is born in May, like

952
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:38,200
Speaker 2: you're gay. Yeah, Like that's such a gay ass month.

953
00:46:41,160 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 1: So stupid. Well, I think it's time for me to

954
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 1: tell this story. Maybe I have told it, but I've

955
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:51,319
Speaker 1: been thinking a lot about wanting to do my hair

956
00:46:51,360 --> 00:46:54,040
Speaker 1: and all this shit. And I have such bad PTSD

957
00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 1: with anything cosmetic or like beauty related because I have

958
00:46:57,320 --> 00:46:59,920
Speaker 1: had fuck ass experiences and I don't think of it

959
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:04,400
Speaker 1: ever told this story. But one time, when I was

960
00:47:04,440 --> 00:47:06,920
Speaker 1: in Miami, it was after I graduated, I really wanted

961
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:08,799
Speaker 1: hair extensions. It was when my hair was like up

962
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:11,400
Speaker 1: to hear and I wanted long hair. So I found

963
00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:14,719
Speaker 1: someone and it was at all to Beauty where I

964
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:16,440
Speaker 1: went to go get my hair done, which is a

965
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:19,319
Speaker 1: crazy vibe and I went and I got keratin, like

966
00:47:19,400 --> 00:47:22,319
Speaker 1: not keratin, but the beaded extensions that they like. Get

967
00:47:22,320 --> 00:47:26,240
Speaker 1: that little waxing and tip it around. I served another

968
00:47:26,480 --> 00:47:30,600
Speaker 1: satisfied customer too. I think I do. I think I do,

969
00:47:31,040 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 1: but it's gonna take me a minute to find them.

970
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:36,960
Speaker 1: But I was so embarrassed that I took one picture

971
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:39,279
Speaker 1: and I went home. And this is how I'm such

972
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:41,360
Speaker 1: a pushover. I was in the seat and I was like,

973
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:44,480
Speaker 1: I love it. I love it. I paid, I tipped,

974
00:47:44,560 --> 00:47:46,719
Speaker 1: I left. I went home and I got pliers for

975
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:48,680
Speaker 1: my dad and I went in my room and I ply,

976
00:47:49,040 --> 00:47:51,879
Speaker 1: I like took them all out. And I was so

977
00:47:51,920 --> 00:47:53,960
Speaker 1: embarrassed because I had already told all my friends that

978
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,439
Speaker 1: I was getting extensions and they were like, yes, girl,

979
00:47:56,480 --> 00:47:57,839
Speaker 1: let me see the picture. And I was like, bro,

980
00:47:58,040 --> 00:48:00,319
Speaker 1: oh my god. The appointment fell through and I lie

981
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:03,279
Speaker 1: to everyone, but I really need to fight for you.

982
00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:05,759
Speaker 1: I was like eighteen. It was like my first like

983
00:48:05,800 --> 00:48:07,879
Speaker 1: big splurge of like I'm gonna get my hair done.

984
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:09,839
Speaker 1: I never get my hair done by someone else, and

985
00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:13,480
Speaker 1: that's why I have fucking issues. But I really want

986
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:15,400
Speaker 1: to do something fun with my hair. When I'm scared.

987
00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:18,320
Speaker 1: I think I'm just gonna get into wigs. Yeah, like Loria,

988
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:19,839
Speaker 1: I'm going to get into wigs.

989
00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:21,719
Speaker 2: For real, that's my thing. As I'm like, you don't

990
00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 2: have to like cut your hair all crazy right now.

991
00:48:24,200 --> 00:48:26,680
Speaker 2: You can like wear a style or wear a fake

992
00:48:26,760 --> 00:48:29,040
Speaker 2: bang and like see if it like, get a good one,

993
00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:31,440
Speaker 2: spend good money on it and see if you like

994
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:33,680
Speaker 2: the way it looks and like or if you're over

995
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:36,680
Speaker 2: in blonde hair, that's kind I loved your blonde hair era.

996
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:39,560
Speaker 1: I just like like that. But that's also why I

997
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:41,520
Speaker 1: feel like a teenager again. I do have this picture

998
00:48:41,520 --> 00:48:42,959
Speaker 1: of the night we watched The Portrait of a Lady

999
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:43,360
Speaker 1: on Fire.

1000
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 2: Wow.

1001
00:48:45,200 --> 00:48:46,719
Speaker 1: Sorry, this is going to take forever to find.

1002
00:48:48,560 --> 00:48:52,040
Speaker 2: Well, while you're doing that, I will talk about something else.

1003
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:55,239
Speaker 1: I love you guys so much, by the way, I know,

1004
00:48:55,640 --> 00:48:57,239
Speaker 1: I love my friends so much.

1005
00:48:57,360 --> 00:49:00,480
Speaker 2: It hurts me sometimes thinking about everybody, and then it

1006
00:49:00,560 --> 00:49:03,680
Speaker 2: hurts me like thinking about not being with y'all forever,

1007
00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:05,720
Speaker 2: and I don't even like having those thoughts.

1008
00:49:05,920 --> 00:49:07,120
Speaker 1: No, that's not gonna happen.

1009
00:49:07,840 --> 00:49:10,279
Speaker 2: I know the threshold's like seven years and we made it.

1010
00:49:10,640 --> 00:49:13,840
Speaker 2: Like it's like if you can sustain a friendship for

1011
00:49:13,920 --> 00:49:17,160
Speaker 2: seven years, it'll last a lifetime and we're far past that.

1012
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:23,839
Speaker 2: So New Year's Eve was yesterday, two days ago, and

1013
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 2: like everyone knows that they wear divers, Like everyone knows.

1014
00:49:28,560 --> 00:49:30,879
Speaker 1: Oh, like at the front of like the ball drop, Yeah,

1015
00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:34,360
Speaker 1: so they can like kidding, I can't understand the vibe.

1016
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:37,800
Speaker 2: No, that's like I really want their brain studied by science,

1017
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:40,080
Speaker 2: Like I want all of them like before they're like

1018
00:49:41,440 --> 00:49:43,799
Speaker 2: before they leave, they can watch the ball drop, but

1019
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:45,839
Speaker 2: we take their fucking brains from them and study them

1020
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:48,960
Speaker 2: because like, I truly believe those are the happiest people

1021
00:49:48,960 --> 00:49:51,480
Speaker 2: on earth because to put yourself through that, that's like

1022
00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:54,080
Speaker 2: the equivalent to me like having to run like an

1023
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:57,040
Speaker 2: ultra marathon, Like you couldn't you literally could not make

1024
00:49:57,080 --> 00:49:59,000
Speaker 2: me do it. But like they do it, and they

1025
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:02,360
Speaker 2: love it and they're happy to do it. But we

1026
00:50:02,400 --> 00:50:04,759
Speaker 2: all know they wear diapers, Like that's like that's the

1027
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:06,439
Speaker 2: big thing. It's like, oh, they wear diapers and shit

1028
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:09,040
Speaker 2: and piss themselves the whole time. What no one's talking

1029
00:50:09,040 --> 00:50:13,920
Speaker 2: about is the utter fucking stinch.

1030
00:50:13,920 --> 00:50:15,800
Speaker 1: That have somebody reported on the stink.

1031
00:50:15,960 --> 00:50:17,800
Speaker 2: I haven't seen anybody talk about.

1032
00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 1: Its distinct because Also all your bodies are pressed up.

1033
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:23,400
Speaker 2: All your bodies are pressed up, everybody's sweating, everybody shitting

1034
00:50:23,440 --> 00:50:26,239
Speaker 2: and pissing themselves. Like it's literally got to be the

1035
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:28,799
Speaker 2: big stink two point Oh, like London is falling like

1036
00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:30,880
Speaker 2: literally like orb.

1037
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:35,320
Speaker 1: Mean, guys make you diarrhea and hit crazy. Oh I

1038
00:50:35,400 --> 00:50:36,960
Speaker 1: know that New Year's Eve with sting.

1039
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:37,640
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1040
00:50:37,719 --> 00:50:41,640
Speaker 1: Oh, I guess people wait and because there's performances, right,

1041
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:44,240
Speaker 1: don't people perform? So it's technically a free concert.

1042
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:48,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, I okay, I get it, like it's cute, but

1043
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:51,520
Speaker 3: I could never Yeah, but I'm also just like there's

1044
00:50:51,600 --> 00:50:54,520
Speaker 3: really nothing I want that bad I've realized, and that's

1045
00:50:54,520 --> 00:50:55,479
Speaker 3: why I've been trying to wrest.

1046
00:50:55,600 --> 00:50:57,719
Speaker 2: I want to compound that bad.

1047
00:50:57,440 --> 00:50:59,080
Speaker 1: A compound for us all to live on.

1048
00:50:59,239 --> 00:51:01,120
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that's or like a chateau.

1049
00:51:01,440 --> 00:51:03,880
Speaker 1: I wish. No one I knew had family they loved

1050
00:51:03,920 --> 00:51:08,839
Speaker 1: also like I don't, but like I hate how much

1051
00:51:08,880 --> 00:51:11,160
Speaker 1: I love the people I love because my dream would

1052
00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:13,040
Speaker 1: be to move us all into one city, like.

1053
00:51:13,040 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 2: I I want to live in the middle of nowhere

1054
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:16,360
Speaker 2: with all my friends.

1055
00:51:16,520 --> 00:51:19,400
Speaker 1: I was talking to my friend Sabrina about it. I

1056
00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:21,760
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, if I could like build

1057
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:24,840
Speaker 1: out a state, so then there's like this mainland and

1058
00:51:24,880 --> 00:51:26,759
Speaker 1: it's like me and all my friends, and then the

1059
00:51:26,800 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 1: town over that's where all our families live, and then

1060
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:32,279
Speaker 1: the town over is where all their friends live. That

1061
00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:34,719
Speaker 1: is what I want.

1062
00:51:35,400 --> 00:51:37,400
Speaker 2: So I think we're just talking about a commune.

1063
00:51:38,760 --> 00:51:39,719
Speaker 1: What's that bad about that?

1064
00:51:39,880 --> 00:51:40,880
Speaker 2: There's nothing bad about it.

1065
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:42,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I feel like when we talk about that

1066
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:44,680
Speaker 1: to random people, they're like, oh, that's a cult. I'm like,

1067
00:51:44,719 --> 00:51:48,480
Speaker 1: that's literally not a literal so fucking what, Like I'm

1068
00:51:48,520 --> 00:51:51,720
Speaker 1: not taking anyone's money. I literally just like that's okay. Actually,

1069
00:51:51,719 --> 00:51:54,480
Speaker 1: that's what annoys me about fucking billionaires is you have

1070
00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:56,200
Speaker 1: all that money, and what are you doing getting on

1071
00:51:56,280 --> 00:52:02,480
Speaker 1: yachts boom boom. You're so boring, Like how are you

1072
00:52:02,520 --> 00:52:05,000
Speaker 1: going to be a money hoarder? But you were using it?

1073
00:52:05,239 --> 00:52:07,680
Speaker 1: So boring And it's because you don't have true connection

1074
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:08,759
Speaker 1: and wealth, no.

1075
00:52:08,760 --> 00:52:13,879
Speaker 2: Swag, no bitches, Like oh god it I literally thought

1076
00:52:13,880 --> 00:52:14,759
Speaker 2: the world was I know.

1077
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:18,400
Speaker 1: I just hate that, Like millionaires and stuff's vibe is

1078
00:52:18,440 --> 00:52:20,880
Speaker 1: going out and getting fucked up with strangers and getting

1079
00:52:20,880 --> 00:52:23,240
Speaker 1: more ego, Like do you is your ego not filled?

1080
00:52:23,280 --> 00:52:25,520
Speaker 1: You're already like so famous and rint.

1081
00:52:25,560 --> 00:52:28,919
Speaker 2: A table at a club with bottle service, Like what

1082
00:52:29,360 --> 00:52:32,719
Speaker 2: can you literally like? Instead of that, how about you

1083
00:52:33,200 --> 00:52:38,520
Speaker 2: hug your loved ones? No, how about you sit in

1084
00:52:38,560 --> 00:52:39,960
Speaker 2: bed on iPhone? Like I know?

1085
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:42,880
Speaker 1: How about you pay for a therapist and wonder why

1086
00:52:42,920 --> 00:52:45,520
Speaker 1: that you were trying to chase high school terms of

1087
00:52:46,320 --> 00:52:49,640
Speaker 1: admiration in public? Like it just feels so high school

1088
00:52:49,800 --> 00:52:51,080
Speaker 1: Like like.

1089
00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:53,240
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, you were a loser in fucking high school.

1090
00:52:53,280 --> 00:52:55,160
Speaker 2: Like we all know it, Like we can tell like

1091
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:56,680
Speaker 2: based on the way you behave now.

1092
00:52:56,719 --> 00:52:59,160
Speaker 1: But I have a burnt ego and you're in eleven

1093
00:52:59,239 --> 00:53:00,480
Speaker 1: on New Year's Eve?

1094
00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:04,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, how about you heal your inner child's How about

1095
00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:07,440
Speaker 2: you give my child a gun?

1096
00:53:08,160 --> 00:53:08,600
Speaker 1: Oh?

1097
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:10,200
Speaker 2: How about you give my inner child a gun so

1098
00:53:10,239 --> 00:53:10,880
Speaker 2: it'll kill I?

1099
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 1: Literally? Okay? I think I have been losing it because

1100
00:53:13,239 --> 00:53:16,280
Speaker 1: the other day I couldn't describe how I was feeling.

1101
00:53:17,040 --> 00:53:19,400
Speaker 1: And the only way to describe it is it felt

1102
00:53:19,440 --> 00:53:22,800
Speaker 1: like somebody drugged me, knocked me out, hid a gun

1103
00:53:22,920 --> 00:53:24,960
Speaker 1: and a bunch of drugs in my brain for me

1104
00:53:25,040 --> 00:53:27,719
Speaker 1: to like ship them to a different country. Does that

1105
00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:29,719
Speaker 1: make sense? Like that was the kind of anxiety I had.

1106
00:53:29,760 --> 00:53:31,400
Speaker 1: I felt like I had a gun in my head.

1107
00:53:32,239 --> 00:53:36,799
Speaker 2: Zom Okay, well we're gonna do media real quick and

1108
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:39,480
Speaker 2: then we'll probably just continue this episode on Patriot. We're

1109
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:44,239
Speaker 2: trying something new, We're trying something new, but my media

1110
00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 2: bitch wild Robot. I'm not kidding. I know that might.

1111
00:53:47,920 --> 00:53:49,840
Speaker 1: Maybe we've watched that after Wicked tonight.

1112
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:53,600
Speaker 2: That might break my top four on whoa Letterbox, Like

1113
00:53:53,640 --> 00:53:55,279
Speaker 2: I swear to God, Like I don't think it's like

1114
00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:58,040
Speaker 2: the best movie ever made, but it I have never

1115
00:53:58,320 --> 00:54:00,280
Speaker 2: cried at a movie like that ever in my life.

1116
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:03,919
Speaker 2: Like it was like it was simultaneous like happy and

1117
00:54:04,040 --> 00:54:06,320
Speaker 2: sad tears. And it's, like I said, not the best

1118
00:54:06,360 --> 00:54:09,040
Speaker 2: movie ever, but like it just made me think about

1119
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:11,399
Speaker 2: all the women in my life, like made me think

1120
00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:13,760
Speaker 2: about myself as a caretaker for some of the people

1121
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:15,400
Speaker 2: that I love. Like it made me think about like

1122
00:54:15,480 --> 00:54:19,200
Speaker 2: all the moms out there that like literally just detroy

1123
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,520
Speaker 2: themselves to like raise their kids, and like how like

1124
00:54:23,640 --> 00:54:26,480
Speaker 2: friends destroy themselves for their friends. And it's like their

1125
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 2: bodies are literally phys like mother's bodies literally physically fall

1126
00:54:31,160 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 2: apart to raise their kids. They like break bones, they

1127
00:54:34,680 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 2: like their immune systems get shot their skin gets off saggy,

1128
00:54:38,560 --> 00:54:40,680
Speaker 2: like it's so dark sided, but they do it because

1129
00:54:40,719 --> 00:54:43,480
Speaker 2: there's some like love that we can't even like begin

1130
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:46,440
Speaker 2: to comprehend, for like offspring and I don't know it.

1131
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:49,760
Speaker 1: Just like that, I literallycked me pereful to have kids

1132
00:54:50,320 --> 00:54:54,759
Speaker 1: because the way I love the people I love so intensely,

1133
00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:58,040
Speaker 1: like I was having a panic attack for reasons I

1134
00:54:58,080 --> 00:55:00,520
Speaker 1: won't say. Also, I remember in an a so recently,

1135
00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:02,120
Speaker 1: I was talking about that panic attack in Mexico, and

1136
00:55:02,120 --> 00:55:03,400
Speaker 1: I was like, I haven't had a panic attack in

1137
00:55:03,480 --> 00:55:09,959
Speaker 1: so long. I have panic attacks at least six times

1138
00:55:10,040 --> 00:55:12,600
Speaker 1: a year. When I was talking about that, like, I

1139
00:55:12,640 --> 00:55:15,480
Speaker 1: was like, I never have panic attacks. That was just

1140
00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:17,879
Speaker 1: a really bad one that like lasted a long time.

1141
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:21,320
Speaker 1: But I do that all the time, Like I literally

1142
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:23,040
Speaker 1: even yesterday when I was talking to you, that wasn't

1143
00:55:23,040 --> 00:55:26,960
Speaker 1: a panic attack. But like when I'm talking about certain things,

1144
00:55:27,600 --> 00:55:31,279
Speaker 1: I can feel my heart like start to clench and

1145
00:55:31,320 --> 00:55:33,760
Speaker 1: I have to sit down, like I physically can't stand

1146
00:55:33,800 --> 00:55:35,840
Speaker 1: and I can't get the words out and I have

1147
00:55:35,840 --> 00:55:37,239
Speaker 1: to rush them out or I also have a panic

1148
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:42,239
Speaker 1: attack attack. That is crazy though. That's how I've been

1149
00:55:42,280 --> 00:55:45,040
Speaker 1: feeling about Janet Planet. I already said Janet Planet last week,

1150
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:47,560
Speaker 1: but I watched it two times when I was in Miami.

1151
00:55:48,200 --> 00:55:50,040
Speaker 1: It's been like my comfort movie, and I feel like

1152
00:55:50,040 --> 00:55:52,880
Speaker 1: I never have that with movies. But it's just a

1153
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:55,160
Speaker 1: movie I've been putting on and I really like the

1154
00:55:55,200 --> 00:55:57,960
Speaker 1: soundtrack and I really like the story, like it's so good.

1155
00:55:58,040 --> 00:56:01,839
Speaker 1: My other media of the week is baby Girl, Thank

1156
00:56:01,880 --> 00:56:09,480
Speaker 1: You so much, because like I want both of them now.

1157
00:56:11,160 --> 00:56:15,880
Speaker 1: I want both now. And my music media of the

1158
00:56:15,880 --> 00:56:22,120
Speaker 1: week is Walk a Thin Line by Fleetwood Mac and

1159
00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:27,560
Speaker 1: Miracle Man by Bob Carpenter. That's honestly and still Dochi's

1160
00:56:27,600 --> 00:56:30,919
Speaker 1: Tiny Desk crazy because I still just I just will

1161
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:31,960
Speaker 1: play that and listen to it.

1162
00:56:33,360 --> 00:56:36,160
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll do three sy ops and then we're dipping,

1163
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:39,920
Speaker 2: uh enya, here's party and starts digging in her dirty

1164
00:56:39,920 --> 00:56:40,600
Speaker 2: clothes basket.

1165
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:41,799
Speaker 1: Cut the fuck up.

1166
00:56:43,560 --> 00:56:55,799
Speaker 2: Lily Rose Toy, m Lily Rose Toy. It's probably been

1167
00:56:55,840 --> 00:56:59,839
Speaker 2: said because it's so easy, but cuddling it. I've said

1168
00:56:59,840 --> 00:57:01,799
Speaker 2: this one three times, but it's just so perfectly and

1169
00:57:01,840 --> 00:57:04,480
Speaker 2: it literally is how I felt on Crush night. Cuddling

1170
00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:06,319
Speaker 2: a twin feels like you're laying on the Apple TV

1171
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:17,680
Speaker 2: Remote Bones bones, bones bones, Okay, in that's it.

1172
00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:20,120
Speaker 1: You know how I know I'm back in my bisexual

1173
00:57:20,160 --> 00:57:22,640
Speaker 1: bag for real because you were showing me pictures of

1174
00:57:22,680 --> 00:57:24,800
Speaker 1: a man last night that you think is hot, and I,

1175
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:25,960
Speaker 1: for the first time was like.

1176
00:57:28,360 --> 00:57:29,840
Speaker 2: Was it? Oh my?

1177
00:57:30,080 --> 00:57:33,320
Speaker 1: I guess like I would have to tell I was

1178
00:57:33,320 --> 00:57:35,600
Speaker 1: feeling a bit feral over it all. I have to

1179
00:57:35,640 --> 00:57:41,440
Speaker 1: tell Kai, Well, the bad news is someone locked me

1180
00:57:41,520 --> 00:57:45,000
Speaker 1: up because I think I might be becoming a whore.

1181
00:57:45,280 --> 00:57:48,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean enter it. But every time I've exited

1182
00:57:48,760 --> 00:57:52,680
Speaker 2: a hose phase, I've been like two seconds away from

1183
00:57:52,680 --> 00:57:54,120
Speaker 2: being fifty one to fifty So oh.

1184
00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:55,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it's but no, it's I know it's I

1185
00:57:55,920 --> 00:57:58,680
Speaker 1: want to dye my hair and bleach it. I am

1186
00:57:59,440 --> 00:58:03,560
Speaker 1: incredibly optimistic out of like pure survival mode, and I

1187
00:58:03,600 --> 00:58:05,840
Speaker 1: am finding everyone sexy.

1188
00:58:06,040 --> 00:58:13,120
Speaker 2: Like, so y'all better watch the fuck out and it's

1189
00:58:13,160 --> 00:58:17,160
Speaker 2: gonna get you. But that was that episode. Happy New Year, everybody,

1190
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:20,640
Speaker 2: Thank you so fucking much for tuning in. Another year

1191
00:58:20,640 --> 00:58:24,280
Speaker 2: of emergency in our common incoming. You're all the goats,

1192
00:58:24,520 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 2: You're all very special to me, And we'll just say

1193
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:32,680
Speaker 2: some things are going to be changing soon. A lot

1194
00:58:32,720 --> 00:58:35,520
Speaker 2: of a lot of a lot of new things are

1195
00:58:35,560 --> 00:58:45,920
Speaker 2: coming soon, so just be ready for that. Be excited. Please, Peace, love, prosperity, respect,

1196
00:58:46,440 --> 00:59:15,920
Speaker 2: health to you and yours. Sleeps tight tonight, bye,