WEBVTT - #193 Is This Murder? 0:00:00.320 --> 0:00:02.560 Reacting my first thoughts on it. You said this is 0:00:02.560 --> 0:00:08.280 a hard topic. I think it's I don't know why 0:00:08.320 --> 0:00:22.880 we wouldn't call that murder. Hey, everybody, Happy Monday. Welcome 0:00:22.920 --> 0:00:26.880 back to the podcast. This is episode ninety two. I'm 0:00:26.920 --> 0:00:30.080 so glad you guys are here and that you're continuing 0:00:30.080 --> 0:00:33.800 to come back for more questions or maybe this is 0:00:33.800 --> 0:00:36.479 your first time. But what we do here is I 0:00:36.560 --> 0:00:40.760 answer your questions that you email me Granger Smith Podcast 0:00:41.240 --> 0:00:48.080 at gmail dot com. Could be about any subject, life, love, hurt, spiritual, 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:51.640 whatever it might be, email me and we'll talk about it. 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:54.760 Like we're just driving down the road taking our time, 0:00:55.280 --> 0:00:57.360 and you just say, may can I run something bias, 0:00:57.360 --> 0:00:59.840 something's kind of been bugging me lately, or something I've 0:00:59.840 --> 0:01:02.520 been excited about, but I need your opinion on I'm 0:01:02.560 --> 0:01:04.440 not always right, but I'm gonna tell you the best 0:01:04.440 --> 0:01:08.600 I could, just like we're friends. Okay. The first question here, 0:01:08.680 --> 0:01:14.000 Subjectliine says being away from home. Email says, Hey, Grangeer 0:01:14.040 --> 0:01:16.920 first all. First of all, I want to say thank you. 0:01:17.000 --> 0:01:19.240 I'm a huge fan. I've seen you twice now in concert. 0:01:19.840 --> 0:01:21.360 The second time you picked me out of the crowd 0:01:21.400 --> 0:01:24.360 in Calgary at Country Thunder and acknowledged me all because 0:01:24.360 --> 0:01:28.440 I was wearing eeee That's awesome, buddy, he said. This 0:01:28.480 --> 0:01:31.200 is a moment I'll remember a little bit about me. 0:01:31.240 --> 0:01:33.800 I'm twenty five years old. I work full time, week 0:01:33.880 --> 0:01:36.600 on and a week off. I work about four to 0:01:36.680 --> 0:01:40.080 five hours away from home, but luckily I'm able to 0:01:40.120 --> 0:01:42.640 fly back and forth, which really makes it about a 0:01:42.680 --> 0:01:46.839 one hour flight each week. Once a week, I find 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:50.640 myself going on autopilot and following this same seven day 0:01:50.720 --> 0:01:55.720 routine in week in and week out. Other days, and 0:01:55.840 --> 0:01:58.520 usually on the first few nights of my shift, I 0:01:58.560 --> 0:02:03.200 find myself becoming sad and sometimes depressed after being away 0:02:03.200 --> 0:02:07.320 from home. And I'm pretty I'm a pretty stone cold guy. 0:02:07.520 --> 0:02:09.880 But I don't ever really bring it up or talk 0:02:09.880 --> 0:02:12.240 about it, and I find myself getting embarrassed when I 0:02:12.280 --> 0:02:15.079 do have to express something like this. I'm overall pretty 0:02:15.120 --> 0:02:17.760 bad with dealing with my emotions in a general sense. 0:02:18.600 --> 0:02:22.079 My question to you is, how did you or how 0:02:22.120 --> 0:02:24.560 do you still deal with those feelings while being away 0:02:24.560 --> 0:02:27.320 from home and kids and wife while out on tour. 0:02:27.720 --> 0:02:30.320 I know it's a hard comparison, but it's my best 0:02:30.320 --> 0:02:33.919 comparison for a situation like yours. Any advice or insight 0:02:33.960 --> 0:02:36.760 would be appreciated. Thank you for your time. I can't 0:02:36.760 --> 0:02:41.079 wait to sit down and read your book. Sean from Edmonton. Sean, 0:02:41.760 --> 0:02:44.000 I appreciate you so much, brother, and thank you for 0:02:45.120 --> 0:02:48.519 being vulnerable, opening up in a situation like this and 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:53.160 for being a fan. I think it's a good question too. 0:02:53.520 --> 0:02:56.000 I think it's a great question. This is just good 0:02:56.000 --> 0:02:59.760 old fashioned homesickness. What do you do? What do you do? 0:03:00.840 --> 0:03:05.280 And so you didn't say if you have a like 0:03:05.320 --> 0:03:09.639 a wife and children. I don't know. You didn't say 0:03:09.639 --> 0:03:12.359 that you're twenty five years old, though, so you might. 0:03:13.000 --> 0:03:15.600 You work full time, one week on, one week off, 0:03:16.600 --> 0:03:19.080 and this is all about four to five hour drive 0:03:19.360 --> 0:03:22.520 from home. Luckily you fly back and forth, which is 0:03:22.520 --> 0:03:26.520 only an hour flight each every week, right, so the 0:03:26.600 --> 0:03:32.280 distance is not relevant because you're flying. And the good 0:03:32.320 --> 0:03:34.160 thing is you're off. You're home for a week and 0:03:34.200 --> 0:03:37.120 gone for a week. I think that what's getting to 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:43.160 you is the consistency of that that's killing you, just knowing. Okay, 0:03:43.160 --> 0:03:44.960 I got a four days left at home, three days 0:03:45.000 --> 0:03:47.240 left at home, two last day at home, and that 0:03:47.360 --> 0:03:50.080 last day at home, you're not really enjoying it because 0:03:50.080 --> 0:03:52.840 you're packing, you're thinking about work, you're thinking about getting 0:03:52.840 --> 0:03:56.480 some sleep or catching up on sleep or whatever you 0:03:56.480 --> 0:03:58.640 got to do. You're taking care of stuff around the house, 0:03:58.720 --> 0:04:02.160 doing some handyman work around the house, and and you're 0:04:02.160 --> 0:04:05.880 you're not getting that full week, right, So you're not 0:04:05.920 --> 0:04:08.120 really you're not relaxing, you're not spending all of it 0:04:08.160 --> 0:04:10.640 with your family and just soaking it all in. You're 0:04:10.640 --> 0:04:12.520 not being totally present because when you go home, you 0:04:12.520 --> 0:04:15.040 got to take care of stuff. I get it, I 0:04:15.080 --> 0:04:19.240 get it. So the first thing I want to ask you, 0:04:19.400 --> 0:04:21.560 if we're driving down the truck, you're driving in the truck, 0:04:21.640 --> 0:04:23.680 driving down the road, and you you say, hey, man, 0:04:23.720 --> 0:04:27.840 I got this deal, I got this problem. I'm gonna say, well, 0:04:27.960 --> 0:04:31.279 how tell me about the job? You know, what does 0:04:31.360 --> 0:04:34.560 the job mean to you? Is that the only job? 0:04:35.480 --> 0:04:39.680 Is this job pay so much that you can't avoid it? 0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:42.840 Because because my question is going to be that pay 0:04:42.880 --> 0:04:46.240 that money you're getting for this job? Do you know right? 0:04:46.320 --> 0:04:48.800 You know that money or do you know that time 0:04:49.240 --> 0:04:53.920 is money? Right? You know that time is money, very 0:04:54.000 --> 0:04:58.160 valuable money. That's that is your currency. This is all 0:04:58.200 --> 0:05:03.520 of our currency. We use time as our most valuable currency. 0:05:04.160 --> 0:05:11.560 Isn't that crazy to think about? Like time is if 0:05:11.839 --> 0:05:15.680 you spend time, for instance, on your mother, on your wife, 0:05:16.360 --> 0:05:20.280 or on your kids, that is your most valuable gift 0:05:20.400 --> 0:05:25.240 to them. It's also the most valuable gift to yourself, 0:05:26.400 --> 0:05:30.440 and it's priceless. You cannot pay for time, and once 0:05:30.440 --> 0:05:34.240 it's gone, you never get it back. And yet we 0:05:34.440 --> 0:05:41.680 carelessly spend it all the time, constantly wasting time doing 0:05:42.240 --> 0:05:49.880 monotonous things, losing ourselves, stuck on social media or watching 0:05:49.880 --> 0:05:54.719 a meaningless show on our phone, doing something where we're 0:05:54.760 --> 0:06:00.000 going unconscious and consuming something from the world and stead 0:06:00.160 --> 0:06:05.520 of contributing back. That's that's something I always think about 0:06:05.560 --> 0:06:09.440 that how are we spending our most valuable resource? How 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:13.520 are we doing it? And so there's that to think about. 0:06:13.520 --> 0:06:15.000 When you're a week on and when and you're and 0:06:15.000 --> 0:06:18.200 then you're a week back off, how are you spending 0:06:18.200 --> 0:06:21.000 those two weeks one while you're working and one while 0:06:21.040 --> 0:06:24.360 you're at home. It's so important to think about that, 0:06:24.360 --> 0:06:27.640 to be thinking through every minute, every hour that you're 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:30.960 that you're doing these things for all of us time 0:06:30.960 --> 0:06:36.200 blocking or journaling our time. But on top of all that. 0:06:36.400 --> 0:06:38.720 What I would ask you is, as you think about 0:06:38.760 --> 0:06:41.599 your job and you think about I'm assuming you probably 0:06:41.640 --> 0:06:45.120 get paid, well, that's why you do it. That's that's 0:06:45.120 --> 0:06:47.200 how you're justifying. It's like, well, men, it's a good job, 0:06:48.160 --> 0:06:49.880 a work a week on, week off, but it's a 0:06:50.080 --> 0:06:52.880 it's a good job, it's a good pay and gig. Okay, 0:06:53.400 --> 0:06:56.400 So I would say, you've got to reconcile the good 0:06:56.480 --> 0:07:01.200 pay for the time you're spending away from home because 0:07:01.200 --> 0:07:04.640 you're only getting you know, twenty six weeks at home 0:07:05.839 --> 0:07:11.000 and you're spending twenty six weeks out right. How much 0:07:11.080 --> 0:07:13.760 are those twenty six weeks worth to you? If at 0:07:13.760 --> 0:07:15.240 the end of your life you look back and you 0:07:15.240 --> 0:07:18.559 could pay money to get those twenty six weeks back 0:07:19.000 --> 0:07:22.760 every year, how much money would you pay. Would it 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:26.840 be millions? If you had millions of dollars if you 0:07:26.880 --> 0:07:30.680 could pay that back, it might even be billions. Isn't 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:33.720 that crazy? If someone at the end of your life 0:07:33.760 --> 0:07:37.400 they said, hey, we're going to give you an infinite 0:07:37.400 --> 0:07:41.480 amount of wealth, But how much money would you spend 0:07:41.520 --> 0:07:44.760 on getting all of those weeks that you spent working back? 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:51.280 And you'd say five billion dollars. It's interesting. These are 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:54.960 just things to think through. I'm not telling you quit 0:07:55.000 --> 0:07:56.920 your job, and I'm not telling you it's a bad job, 0:07:56.960 --> 0:08:02.160 and just saying be mindful of being present and spending 0:08:02.200 --> 0:08:11.520 your most valuable resource, your time wisely. Next question subject, 0:08:11.520 --> 0:08:14.040 LiLine says, this one's a kicker. I grand your. My 0:08:14.120 --> 0:08:16.240 name is Hannah, I'm twenty three. I live in Mississippi. 0:08:16.840 --> 0:08:19.200 This topic is one a lot of people don't like 0:08:19.240 --> 0:08:21.040 to talk about. But since you're in the business of 0:08:21.080 --> 0:08:24.480 answering hard questions, i'd love your input on this. What's 0:08:24.520 --> 0:08:29.440 your opinion on physician assisted suicide in terminally ill patience? 0:08:30.080 --> 0:08:34.079 Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Okay, thank you, Hannah, I 0:08:34.160 --> 0:08:37.600 appreciate you. Shout out to Mississippi. This is the point 0:08:37.600 --> 0:08:41.080 in the podcast when I remind everyone I don't I 0:08:41.120 --> 0:08:45.160 don't pre plan these questions, and I don't pre plan 0:08:45.320 --> 0:08:48.680 my answers. I don't have quotes and famous books around 0:08:48.679 --> 0:08:51.720 me that I pull and resource. I just I'm hearing 0:08:51.720 --> 0:08:55.280 them and reacting the same time you do. Okay, so 0:08:55.880 --> 0:08:57.880 you say sharing wisdom, I don't know if i'd call 0:08:57.960 --> 0:09:01.320 it wisdom. This is just you know, this is campfire 0:09:01.360 --> 0:09:03.840 talking here, So pull up a chair, get a little 0:09:03.880 --> 0:09:06.079 closer to the campfire, Let's get some s'mores. Let's talk 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:14.040 about physician assisted suicide and terminally ill patience. Okay, reacting 0:09:14.240 --> 0:09:15.800 my first thoughts on it, you said this is a 0:09:15.800 --> 0:09:21.160 hard topic. I think it's I don't I don't know 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:24.920 why we wouldn't call that murder. That's just that's the 0:09:24.960 --> 0:09:30.600 way I want to put it, because in defense of it, 0:09:30.840 --> 0:09:36.120 if someone's defending physician assisted suicide and someone that's terminally ill, 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:44.760 you're saying, you're saying that person is not worthy of 0:09:44.840 --> 0:09:49.760 living anymore. That person has nothing left to live for. 0:09:50.080 --> 0:09:54.080 You could say it that way. So let's kill them 0:09:55.240 --> 0:09:59.600 because they don't have anything worth living for anymore. Because 0:09:59.760 --> 0:10:02.200 they're gonna die, we might as well just speed up 0:10:02.240 --> 0:10:06.560 the process. Maybe they're in pain, maybe this is maybe 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:10.320 they're depressed. Let's give them a gift and help them 0:10:10.880 --> 0:10:15.760 murder themselves so that they could just be in peace. 0:10:18.440 --> 0:10:25.720 However you word it, it's murder, right, And you'll learn 0:10:25.720 --> 0:10:27.600 with me. If you're new to this podcast, you'll learn that. 0:10:27.720 --> 0:10:30.600 I'm so sorry if I'm offending you, but that's not 0:10:30.720 --> 0:10:33.679 my intention. My intention is not to clickbait you, or 0:10:34.080 --> 0:10:36.160 to make a bunch of people angry, or to try 0:10:36.200 --> 0:10:39.720 to rile you up by being polarizing. That's never my 0:10:39.800 --> 0:10:42.640 intention to offend anyone. So if this is if this 0:10:42.840 --> 0:10:47.560 is speaking directly to maybe someone's grandparent or parent, that's 0:10:47.600 --> 0:10:50.199 not my intention. I'm not trying to call anybody out 0:10:50.240 --> 0:10:53.360 or make any kind of judgment. I'm talking about the 0:10:53.600 --> 0:10:59.280 general scenario of this question, what the implications are for 0:10:59.440 --> 0:11:02.400 future of that haven't happened yet. I would say, I 0:11:02.440 --> 0:11:06.559 don't know why you wouldn't think this is murder. Think 0:11:06.600 --> 0:11:09.559 of it in any other way. What if the person 0:11:09.679 --> 0:11:12.160 isn't agreeing to it, What if they don't know about it. 0:11:12.200 --> 0:11:15.200 What if they're in a coma okay, but there's a 0:11:15.280 --> 0:11:18.679 chance they can come back. Would you say, I know 0:11:18.760 --> 0:11:21.120 there's a chance they can come back, but we should 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:26.880 just kill them because they'll be better off dead. I 0:11:26.880 --> 0:11:32.640 would say that's murder. It's murder. We're not talking about that. 0:11:32.679 --> 0:11:34.520 They haven't been convicted of a crime, and they're not 0:11:34.559 --> 0:11:40.000 on death row here right, This isn't capital punishment. It's murder. 0:11:41.880 --> 0:11:44.760 Even if they are agreeing to it, they are agreeing 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:49.640 to the murder of their own body. And so here's 0:11:49.679 --> 0:11:53.319 my point. That's just the static look at it, that's 0:11:53.320 --> 0:11:57.120 the the overall look at it. But if you dig 0:11:57.160 --> 0:12:01.160 deeper in it, you're saying, even if you're the person 0:12:01.240 --> 0:12:08.400 agreeing to this, you're saying, I I know, I am certain, 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:12.760 I am positive this is a fact that I have 0:12:13.280 --> 0:12:17.640 nothing left that matters that is worthy of living for 0:12:18.200 --> 0:12:23.120 that I am certain of this, right, And here's the truth. 0:12:24.160 --> 0:12:28.000 You're not certain of that. You don't know. You don't 0:12:28.040 --> 0:12:31.120 know when your last breath will be. You don't know 0:12:31.559 --> 0:12:35.800 what might happen. You don't know who you can affect 0:12:35.800 --> 0:12:40.679 in a positive way. You don't know what your story 0:12:40.760 --> 0:12:44.520 could do for someone else. Even if you're terminally ill, 0:12:45.600 --> 0:12:49.440 and the doctor says you have weeks or hours, you 0:12:49.480 --> 0:12:53.320 don't know when your final breath is coming, meaning you 0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:58.000 don't know if you still matter. That's just the coldest 0:12:58.040 --> 0:12:59.680 way I could say it. But that's what I'm trying. 0:12:59.720 --> 0:13:02.120 That's my point. I'm trying to make you don't know. 0:13:02.880 --> 0:13:06.240 And because you don't know, you think you know, and 0:13:06.280 --> 0:13:08.520 you want to you want to pull the plug on yourself. 0:13:08.760 --> 0:13:15.120 That's murdering yourself, right. Physician assisted that's what however you 0:13:15.160 --> 0:13:17.400 want to look at it, whatever the sweetest term is. 0:13:18.720 --> 0:13:23.040 I believe that is murder, even if it's consented by 0:13:23.080 --> 0:13:28.719 the person. Okay, I don't think there's much more to say. 0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:36.160 I think that's a tragedy. Let's got another question here, 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:39.920 Suvid client says grief and regret. Hey, Grangeer, love your podcast. Man. 0:13:39.960 --> 0:13:42.240 My name is Jonah. I'm sixteen years old. Really appreciate 0:13:42.320 --> 0:13:44.640 what you do. Over these past years, I've been struggling 0:13:44.920 --> 0:13:48.440 with the sudden and unexpected death of my grandpa. Now, 0:13:48.520 --> 0:13:51.560 my grandpa has suffered from a head trauma and this 0:13:51.640 --> 0:13:55.800 affected his body for the rest of his life. This 0:13:55.880 --> 0:13:58.920 meant he had to relearn a lot of basic needs. Miraculously, 0:13:59.200 --> 0:14:01.680 he ended up living twenty plus years, longer than what 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:03.880 we were told, and he was able to watch his 0:14:03.920 --> 0:14:07.080 grandchildren grow up. My family and I had the blessing 0:14:07.280 --> 0:14:09.559 of living have him living with us for the past 0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:11.640 two years of his life. My grandpa was always in 0:14:11.720 --> 0:14:15.079 and out of the hospital and we were never expected 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:18.560 anything bad that might happen to him. He was a 0:14:18.600 --> 0:14:21.760 tough guy. When my grandpa went into the hospital with 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.040 a stomach ache, we thought he'd be out soon. About 0:14:24.040 --> 0:14:26.800 a week or two so later. He had two heart 0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:30.120 attacks and machines were keeping him alive. We had to 0:14:30.200 --> 0:14:32.480 let him go. His body was very weak and he 0:14:32.520 --> 0:14:38.680 was ready. That's different than assisted suicide. Right, Okay, that's different. 0:14:39.160 --> 0:14:40.840 We're talking about two different scenarios. I just had to 0:14:41.080 --> 0:14:45.000 had to interject and say that that's different. In some 0:14:45.200 --> 0:14:48.160 then it's different. Let me just stop right here and 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:51.160 separate these two questions, because this is a different scenario. 0:14:51.360 --> 0:14:55.520 If you're if you're on a life support machine and 0:14:55.640 --> 0:15:02.600 you're you're battling, and you say say turn the machine off, 0:15:03.360 --> 0:15:06.640 let me breathe my own power, let me see my 0:15:06.720 --> 0:15:10.240 family on my own power, that's different. That's not physician 0:15:10.360 --> 0:15:17.800 assisted suicide. Right, Okay, back to the question. During the 0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:21.160 time in the hospital, I was I was never bothered 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:27.440 calling him or sent even a thoughtful text because I 0:15:27.440 --> 0:15:29.320 had thought he had come home, and I would struggle 0:15:29.360 --> 0:15:31.480 forgiving myself for that. I'm not sure quite what that means. 0:15:31.840 --> 0:15:34.720 His services gave me a little closure knowing that he 0:15:34.840 --> 0:15:37.120 was gone and that he's in a better place without 0:15:37.160 --> 0:15:39.720 any pain. But I wish I had made more of 0:15:39.760 --> 0:15:41.840 an effort to talk to someone Okay, I see what 0:15:41.880 --> 0:15:44.800 he's saying. He didn't talk to anybody during this who 0:15:44.840 --> 0:15:47.480 probably wanted nothing more than to talk about talk to 0:15:47.560 --> 0:15:49.760 one of the people he loved the most while he 0:15:49.800 --> 0:15:53.800 was there. I know my grandpa loved me and he 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:55.800 would want he would not want me to be upset 0:15:55.800 --> 0:15:59.000 over this, But I just can't help but think about it. 0:15:59.160 --> 0:16:02.640 I still expect him to come home. Sometimes it still 0:16:02.680 --> 0:16:06.200 doesn't feel real. I hate going back to normal without 0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:08.840 him in my life. There's always something missing without him. Here. 0:16:08.840 --> 0:16:14.280 Any advice. Okay, Jonah, sixteen years old, lost your grandpa 0:16:16.520 --> 0:16:19.960 and this is over the past year. Okay, got it 0:16:20.560 --> 0:16:23.680 all right, brother, let's dive into this. I want to 0:16:23.680 --> 0:16:34.080 tell you something. I'm gonna tell everybody something. Grandpa's die. 0:16:34.720 --> 0:16:38.880 I have to say that sometimes on this podcast because 0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:44.320 it almost feels like sometimes people forget but Grandpa's die. 0:16:45.920 --> 0:16:49.640 And you might be thinking, Ah, come on, man, give 0:16:49.680 --> 0:16:54.440 me some wisdom here. But what I mean is sometimes 0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:56.520 I want to say, Jonah, if we were riding in 0:16:56.560 --> 0:17:00.000 the truck together, I'd say, Jonah, gonna ask you a question, buddy. 0:17:00.440 --> 0:17:03.320 You say up in here in the top of your question, 0:17:04.800 --> 0:17:12.640 you're saying, we never expected anything bad to happen to him. 0:17:12.680 --> 0:17:17.399 He was a tough guy, that's what you said. And 0:17:17.440 --> 0:17:19.000 so if you were riding in the truck with me, 0:17:19.040 --> 0:17:23.200 I'd say, Jonah, did you think he wasn't going to die? 0:17:23.400 --> 0:17:27.320 Did you think he was going to outlive you? Now, 0:17:27.400 --> 0:17:31.280 that sounds so simple, but sometimes we need to process 0:17:31.480 --> 0:17:33.800 simple things before we get deep and get on a 0:17:33.840 --> 0:17:37.440 deep level. Here, we just got to process some simple things, 0:17:37.480 --> 0:17:41.760 like Grandpa always was going to die, and he was 0:17:41.800 --> 0:17:44.560 going to die for some reason or another at some 0:17:44.840 --> 0:17:50.879 point in time. Now, in a scenario like this, we 0:17:50.960 --> 0:17:54.480 could have guessed that he would live a couple more years. 0:17:54.920 --> 0:17:56.840 We could have guessed that he was going to die 0:17:56.880 --> 0:18:01.040 twenty years before this. But the bottom line is, Jonah, 0:18:01.440 --> 0:18:04.960 he was gonna die. And there is something about that 0:18:04.960 --> 0:18:12.640 that's helpful in these discussions. It's like sometimes we're surprised 0:18:12.720 --> 0:18:17.680 by death, you know, like, oh, man, I just don't 0:18:17.720 --> 0:18:22.520 know what to do. Grandpa died, and I have sympathy 0:18:22.560 --> 0:18:26.240 for that. I've lost two grandpas, I've lost a dad. 0:18:27.480 --> 0:18:32.280 I have sympathy for that, and I've lost many other 0:18:32.320 --> 0:18:35.960 people in my life, but specifically speaking to the patriarchs 0:18:36.000 --> 0:18:38.879 in my family, have lost two grandpa's and a dad, 0:18:39.880 --> 0:18:42.840 and sometimes you have to come to grips that dads 0:18:42.840 --> 0:18:45.359 are going to die. Grandpa's are going to die. And 0:18:45.400 --> 0:18:47.960 when you know that, and you believe that, and you 0:18:48.080 --> 0:18:51.399 understand that, then you could move the level too of 0:18:51.440 --> 0:18:55.080 the grief. You could move on and instead of being 0:18:55.200 --> 0:18:59.399 stuck in the surprise that they're not here anymore. I 0:18:59.440 --> 0:19:06.480 remember when Dad died. I remember the next morning the 0:19:06.520 --> 0:19:10.359 sun came up after because he died. I found out 0:19:10.400 --> 0:19:14.000 that night before. Mom found him after a heart attack, 0:19:16.560 --> 0:19:22.359 and he was sixty one, so unexpected, there were no 0:19:22.560 --> 0:19:28.600 prior health issues. Mom just found him asleep in the chair. 0:19:30.040 --> 0:19:35.560 He was gone, massive heart attack. The next morning, the 0:19:35.640 --> 0:19:41.600 sun came up, and Jonah, just like your email, I 0:19:41.640 --> 0:19:51.200 remember thinking, man, the sun comes up without Dad, legitimate thought. 0:19:53.080 --> 0:19:55.879 I remember going out to the road and seeing cars 0:19:55.960 --> 0:20:01.520 driving and I was like, huh, people are driving around 0:20:02.200 --> 0:20:08.439 living their lives in a world without Dad here. I 0:20:08.480 --> 0:20:12.879 mean that sounds crazy to someone that has never experienced this, 0:20:13.040 --> 0:20:15.800 But someone that's going through grief, someone that Jonah, you 0:20:15.840 --> 0:20:19.080 know you lost your grandpa, someone that has been through it, 0:20:19.080 --> 0:20:24.360 it's like, yeah, it's weird, Like people live lives without 0:20:24.400 --> 0:20:28.879 your loved one. Here the sun still comes up and 0:20:28.920 --> 0:20:32.879 it goes back down again. One day gone, one day 0:20:33.400 --> 0:20:37.840 gone without Dad in it. In my life, that's strange 0:20:38.080 --> 0:20:40.080 for you, jonaht your grandpa, and I remember feeling the 0:20:40.080 --> 0:20:44.000 same thing with my grandpa. But these are good things 0:20:44.000 --> 0:20:49.080 to process through. It's good things to realize that the 0:20:49.119 --> 0:20:53.280 sun comes up and it goes back down, and there 0:20:53.320 --> 0:20:55.560 is a rhythm to it, and there's a rhythm to 0:20:55.600 --> 0:20:58.600 this world. There's a rhythm to this planet, to this universe. 0:20:59.560 --> 0:21:01.919 There is a there was a timing to it, there 0:21:01.960 --> 0:21:04.560 is a pattern to it, and we could trust it. 0:21:04.920 --> 0:21:09.680 You could trust that son's gonna come back up. God 0:21:09.680 --> 0:21:12.960 has given us a perfect rhythm that we could rely on, 0:21:14.440 --> 0:21:17.560 and death is part of that rhythm. And once we 0:21:17.600 --> 0:21:22.919 feel that and we're flowing with it, it's easier to 0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:27.840 get past the shock and surprise of it. As if 0:21:28.240 --> 0:21:31.919 we thought that maybe this time, this not this grandpa, 0:21:32.440 --> 0:21:36.959 This grandpa was gonna live forever, Like I know, Grandpa's died, Granger, 0:21:37.040 --> 0:21:39.200 but this one, you don't know. This one. He was tough, 0:21:39.600 --> 0:21:45.520 he was gonna live past me. I say no, no, 0:21:45.680 --> 0:21:52.680 he didn't make it either. You'll get that money. We'll 0:21:52.680 --> 0:21:58.560 take a break there of that. Thank you for listening 0:21:58.600 --> 0:22:01.040 to the podcast. You know, my book Like a River 0:22:01.160 --> 0:22:04.800 comes out August first. I just I can't say enough 0:22:04.960 --> 0:22:07.960 how excited I am for at least the conversation starter. 0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:10.760 So many of these emails that come in are about 0:22:10.800 --> 0:22:13.040 grief and loss and about my story, and I just 0:22:13.119 --> 0:22:15.520 I want so badly just to say, read the book, 0:22:15.520 --> 0:22:18.480 get back to me, let's discuss. So that happens on 0:22:18.520 --> 0:22:21.680 August the first, and you can pre order right now 0:22:21.880 --> 0:22:24.240 from grangersmith dot com. That's gonna kind of kick you 0:22:24.280 --> 0:22:27.200 out to all the different places that sell books. You 0:22:27.280 --> 0:22:29.720 can get it anywhere that sells books, but grangersmith dot 0:22:29.720 --> 0:22:32.480 com can be the hub for that. And then also 0:22:32.560 --> 0:22:34.679 you could get a free chapter right away whenever you 0:22:34.680 --> 0:22:36.960 do it. So pre order right now and then the 0:22:36.960 --> 0:22:39.399 book Like a River comes out August the first. If 0:22:39.440 --> 0:22:40.720 you need to get a hold of me right now, 0:22:40.760 --> 0:22:42.520 if you want me to send you a video message 0:22:42.520 --> 0:22:46.200 of me saying happy birthday or happy Annavertree or whatever 0:22:46.200 --> 0:22:49.800 the message might be, cameo dot com slash grangersmith is 0:22:49.840 --> 0:22:51.800 a great way to do that. You could also download 0:22:51.800 --> 0:22:54.840 the cameo app and search for me Granger Smith. I 0:22:54.920 --> 0:22:58.359 will then send you a video message according to whatever 0:22:58.400 --> 0:23:00.320 you want me to say it to who whatever you 0:23:00.359 --> 0:23:02.320 want me to say it too. It's a great way, 0:23:02.920 --> 0:23:06.119 uh to keep in touch, get a little last minute 0:23:06.160 --> 0:23:09.280 gift if you forgot something right again. That's Cameo dot 0:23:09.359 --> 0:23:16.800 com slash Granger Smith. Back to the podcast last break, 0:23:16.840 --> 0:23:19.480 I said this is episode one. I believe this is 0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:23.600 one ninety three. Actually, wow, we're almost two one hundred 0:23:23.600 --> 0:23:25.280 and seven, shy, I have one hundred episodes. I mean 0:23:25.320 --> 0:23:28.080 two hundred episodes. This is how fast it goes by 0:23:28.160 --> 0:23:32.160 for me. You can believe this two hundred episodes. That's crazy. 0:23:33.040 --> 0:23:36.200 I'm answering your questions. You email me Grangersmith podcast at 0:23:36.240 --> 0:23:39.679 gmail dot com. Love to hear from you, love to 0:23:39.720 --> 0:23:42.560 walk through something with you. And I'm gonna just kind 0:23:42.560 --> 0:23:47.639 of slide this thing down and find me a question, 0:23:47.880 --> 0:23:50.719 a random one. Have not checked these before? Boom, here 0:23:50.800 --> 0:23:56.000 we go, it says, hey, Granger love the podcast. You 0:23:56.000 --> 0:23:58.680 have so much wisdom. I don't know about that. I'm 0:23:58.680 --> 0:24:01.600 twenty eight years old from i Mac Washington, home to 0:24:01.640 --> 0:24:04.760 the world famous suicide race. I grew up in a 0:24:04.800 --> 0:24:07.440 family that went to church every week, but I never 0:24:07.560 --> 0:24:11.040 had a good relationship with God. Just recently I started 0:24:11.080 --> 0:24:13.840 to pray and listen to my Bible more. It is 0:24:13.920 --> 0:24:16.440 amazing how God has changed my heart in the last 0:24:16.520 --> 0:24:20.240 couple months. How do I pray for a future spouse 0:24:20.280 --> 0:24:24.240 without making it about me? God has blessed a small 0:24:24.280 --> 0:24:29.000 construction electrical company I just started. But how do I 0:24:29.040 --> 0:24:31.080 make sure I'm doing the things I need to be 0:24:31.200 --> 0:24:36.919 doing as a man of God? All right, Matt, this 0:24:37.040 --> 0:24:40.520 is that's your name, Matt. I shout out to beautiful Washington, 0:24:41.160 --> 0:24:44.720 and I appreciate you opening up, buddy. Yeah, praise God 0:24:44.760 --> 0:24:47.080 for his work in you and what He has done 0:24:47.240 --> 0:24:49.880 for you and in the eyes he has opened. And 0:24:50.280 --> 0:24:52.919 I want to dive into your question. I got to 0:24:52.960 --> 0:24:55.199 you kind of at the last part of your email. 0:24:55.240 --> 0:24:57.040 You kind of shot a couple questions out. How do 0:24:57.080 --> 0:24:59.160 I pray for a future spouse without making it about 0:24:59.200 --> 0:25:02.160 my timing? And how do I make sure I'm doing 0:25:02.200 --> 0:25:04.960 the things related to your business then I need to 0:25:04.960 --> 0:25:07.400 be doing as a man of God. Great man, great 0:25:07.480 --> 0:25:12.880 questions to be thinking about. And I don't necessarily think 0:25:12.960 --> 0:25:16.159 you're you're specifically talking about any of these things. I 0:25:16.160 --> 0:25:19.400 think you're just mainly thinking about life in general. How 0:25:19.400 --> 0:25:22.119 do I be a disciple? Like how do I serve 0:25:22.200 --> 0:25:25.240 God right? How do I make sure that that I'm 0:25:25.240 --> 0:25:27.760 not getting caught up and like building a company and 0:25:27.800 --> 0:25:32.360 getting lost and power and greed in the world and 0:25:32.400 --> 0:25:37.199 finding a spouse just because because she's satisfying something in 0:25:37.280 --> 0:25:39.240