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Speaker 1: Reacting my first thoughts on it. You said this is

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Speaker 1: a hard topic. I think it's I don't know why

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Speaker 1: we wouldn't call that murder. Hey, everybody, Happy Monday. Welcome

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Speaker 1: back to the podcast. This is episode ninety two. I'm

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Speaker 1: so glad you guys are here and that you're continuing

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Speaker 1: to come back for more questions or maybe this is

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Speaker 1: your first time. But what we do here is I

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Speaker 1: answer your questions that you email me Granger Smith Podcast

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Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. Could be about any subject, life, love, hurt, spiritual,

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Speaker 1: whatever it might be, email me and we'll talk about it.

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Speaker 1: Like we're just driving down the road taking our time,

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Speaker 1: and you just say, may can I run something bias,

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Speaker 1: something's kind of been bugging me lately, or something I've

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Speaker 1: been excited about, but I need your opinion on I'm

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Speaker 1: not always right, but I'm gonna tell you the best

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Speaker 1: I could, just like we're friends. Okay. The first question here,

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Speaker 1: Subjectliine says being away from home. Email says, Hey, Grangeer

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Speaker 1: first all. First of all, I want to say thank you.

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Speaker 1: I'm a huge fan. I've seen you twice now in concert.

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Speaker 1: The second time you picked me out of the crowd

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Speaker 1: in Calgary at Country Thunder and acknowledged me all because

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Speaker 1: I was wearing eeee That's awesome, buddy, he said. This

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Speaker 1: is a moment I'll remember a little bit about me.

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Speaker 1: I'm twenty five years old. I work full time, week

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Speaker 1: on and a week off. I work about four to

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Speaker 1: five hours away from home, but luckily I'm able to

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Speaker 1: fly back and forth, which really makes it about a

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Speaker 1: one hour flight each week. Once a week, I find

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Speaker 1: myself going on autopilot and following this same seven day

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Speaker 1: routine in week in and week out. Other days, and

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Speaker 1: usually on the first few nights of my shift, I

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Speaker 1: find myself becoming sad and sometimes depressed after being away

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Speaker 1: from home. And I'm pretty I'm a pretty stone cold guy.

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Speaker 1: But I don't ever really bring it up or talk

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Speaker 1: about it, and I find myself getting embarrassed when I

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Speaker 1: do have to express something like this. I'm overall pretty

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Speaker 1: bad with dealing with my emotions in a general sense.

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Speaker 1: My question to you is, how did you or how

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Speaker 1: do you still deal with those feelings while being away

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Speaker 1: from home and kids and wife while out on tour.

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Speaker 1: I know it's a hard comparison, but it's my best

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Speaker 1: comparison for a situation like yours. Any advice or insight

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Speaker 1: would be appreciated. Thank you for your time. I can't

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Speaker 1: wait to sit down and read your book. Sean from Edmonton. Sean,

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Speaker 1: I appreciate you so much, brother, and thank you for

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Speaker 1: being vulnerable, opening up in a situation like this and

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Speaker 1: for being a fan. I think it's a good question too.

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Speaker 1: I think it's a great question. This is just good

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Speaker 1: old fashioned homesickness. What do you do? What do you do?

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Speaker 1: And so you didn't say if you have a like

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Speaker 1: a wife and children. I don't know. You didn't say

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Speaker 1: that you're twenty five years old, though, so you might.

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Speaker 1: You work full time, one week on, one week off,

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Speaker 1: and this is all about four to five hour drive

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Speaker 1: from home. Luckily you fly back and forth, which is

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Speaker 1: only an hour flight each every week, right, so the

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Speaker 1: distance is not relevant because you're flying. And the good

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Speaker 1: thing is you're off. You're home for a week and

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Speaker 1: gone for a week. I think that what's getting to

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Speaker 1: you is the consistency of that that's killing you, just knowing. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I got a four days left at home, three days

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Speaker 1: left at home, two last day at home, and that

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Speaker 1: last day at home, you're not really enjoying it because

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Speaker 1: you're packing, you're thinking about work, you're thinking about getting

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Speaker 1: some sleep or catching up on sleep or whatever you

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Speaker 1: got to do. You're taking care of stuff around the house,

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Speaker 1: doing some handyman work around the house, and and you're

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Speaker 1: you're not getting that full week, right, So you're not

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Speaker 1: really you're not relaxing, you're not spending all of it

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Speaker 1: with your family and just soaking it all in. You're

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Speaker 1: not being totally present because when you go home, you

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Speaker 1: got to take care of stuff. I get it, I

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Speaker 1: get it. So the first thing I want to ask you,

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Speaker 1: if we're driving down the truck, you're driving in the truck,

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Speaker 1: driving down the road, and you you say, hey, man,

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Speaker 1: I got this deal, I got this problem. I'm gonna say, well,

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Speaker 1: how tell me about the job? You know, what does

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Speaker 1: the job mean to you? Is that the only job?

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Speaker 1: Is this job pay so much that you can't avoid it?

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Speaker 1: Because because my question is going to be that pay

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Speaker 1: that money you're getting for this job? Do you know right?

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Speaker 1: You know that money or do you know that time

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Speaker 1: is money? Right? You know that time is money, very

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Speaker 1: valuable money. That's that is your currency. This is all

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Speaker 1: of our currency. We use time as our most valuable currency.

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Speaker 1: Isn't that crazy to think about? Like time is if

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Speaker 1: you spend time, for instance, on your mother, on your wife,

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Speaker 1: or on your kids, that is your most valuable gift

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Speaker 1: to them. It's also the most valuable gift to yourself,

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Speaker 1: and it's priceless. You cannot pay for time, and once

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Speaker 1: it's gone, you never get it back. And yet we

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Speaker 1: carelessly spend it all the time, constantly wasting time doing

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Speaker 1: monotonous things, losing ourselves, stuck on social media or watching

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Speaker 1: a meaningless show on our phone, doing something where we're

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Speaker 1: going unconscious and consuming something from the world and stead

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Speaker 1: of contributing back. That's that's something I always think about

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Speaker 1: that how are we spending our most valuable resource? How

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Speaker 1: are we doing it? And so there's that to think about.

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Speaker 1: When you're a week on and when and you're and

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Speaker 1: then you're a week back off, how are you spending

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Speaker 1: those two weeks one while you're working and one while

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Speaker 1: you're at home. It's so important to think about that,

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Speaker 1: to be thinking through every minute, every hour that you're

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Speaker 1: that you're doing these things for all of us time

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Speaker 1: blocking or journaling our time. But on top of all that.

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Speaker 1: What I would ask you is, as you think about

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Speaker 1: your job and you think about I'm assuming you probably

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Speaker 1: get paid, well, that's why you do it. That's that's

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Speaker 1: how you're justifying. It's like, well, men, it's a good job,

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Speaker 1: a work a week on, week off, but it's a

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Speaker 1: it's a good job, it's a good pay and gig. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So I would say, you've got to reconcile the good

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Speaker 1: pay for the time you're spending away from home because

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Speaker 1: you're only getting you know, twenty six weeks at home

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Speaker 1: and you're spending twenty six weeks out right. How much

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Speaker 1: are those twenty six weeks worth to you? If at

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Speaker 1: the end of your life you look back and you

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Speaker 1: could pay money to get those twenty six weeks back

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Speaker 1: every year, how much money would you pay. Would it

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Speaker 1: be millions? If you had millions of dollars if you

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Speaker 1: could pay that back, it might even be billions. Isn't

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Speaker 1: that crazy? If someone at the end of your life

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Speaker 1: they said, hey, we're going to give you an infinite

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Speaker 1: amount of wealth, But how much money would you spend

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Speaker 1: on getting all of those weeks that you spent working back?

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Speaker 1: And you'd say five billion dollars. It's interesting. These are

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Speaker 1: just things to think through. I'm not telling you quit

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Speaker 1: your job, and I'm not telling you it's a bad job,

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Speaker 1: and just saying be mindful of being present and spending

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Speaker 1: your most valuable resource, your time wisely. Next question subject,

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Speaker 1: LiLine says, this one's a kicker. I grand your. My

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Speaker 1: name is Hannah, I'm twenty three. I live in Mississippi.

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Speaker 1: This topic is one a lot of people don't like

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Speaker 1: to talk about. But since you're in the business of

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Speaker 1: answering hard questions, i'd love your input on this. What's

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Speaker 1: your opinion on physician assisted suicide in terminally ill patience?

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Speaker 1: Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Okay, thank you, Hannah, I

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Speaker 1: appreciate you. Shout out to Mississippi. This is the point

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Speaker 1: in the podcast when I remind everyone I don't I

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Speaker 1: don't pre plan these questions, and I don't pre plan

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Speaker 1: my answers. I don't have quotes and famous books around

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Speaker 1: me that I pull and resource. I just I'm hearing

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Speaker 1: them and reacting the same time you do. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: you say sharing wisdom, I don't know if i'd call

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Speaker 1: it wisdom. This is just you know, this is campfire

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Speaker 1: talking here, So pull up a chair, get a little

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Speaker 1: closer to the campfire, Let's get some s'mores. Let's talk

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Speaker 1: about physician assisted suicide and terminally ill patience. Okay, reacting

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Speaker 1: my first thoughts on it, you said this is a

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Speaker 1: hard topic. I think it's I don't I don't know

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Speaker 1: why we wouldn't call that murder. That's just that's the

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Speaker 1: way I want to put it, because in defense of it,

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Speaker 1: if someone's defending physician assisted suicide and someone that's terminally ill,

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Speaker 1: you're saying, you're saying that person is not worthy of

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Speaker 1: living anymore. That person has nothing left to live for.

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Speaker 1: You could say it that way. So let's kill them

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Speaker 1: because they don't have anything worth living for anymore. Because

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Speaker 1: they're gonna die, we might as well just speed up

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Speaker 1: the process. Maybe they're in pain, maybe this is maybe

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Speaker 1: they're depressed. Let's give them a gift and help them

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Speaker 1: murder themselves so that they could just be in peace.

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Speaker 1: However you word it, it's murder, right, And you'll learn

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Speaker 1: with me. If you're new to this podcast, you'll learn that.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry if I'm offending you, but that's not

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Speaker 1: my intention. My intention is not to clickbait you, or

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Speaker 1: to make a bunch of people angry, or to try

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Speaker 1: to rile you up by being polarizing. That's never my

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Speaker 1: intention to offend anyone. So if this is if this

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Speaker 1: is speaking directly to maybe someone's grandparent or parent, that's

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Speaker 1: not my intention. I'm not trying to call anybody out

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Speaker 1: or make any kind of judgment. I'm talking about the

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Speaker 1: general scenario of this question, what the implications are for

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Speaker 1: future of that haven't happened yet. I would say, I

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Speaker 1: don't know why you wouldn't think this is murder. Think

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Speaker 1: of it in any other way. What if the person

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Speaker 1: isn't agreeing to it, What if they don't know about it.

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Speaker 1: What if they're in a coma okay, but there's a

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Speaker 1: chance they can come back. Would you say, I know

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Speaker 1: there's a chance they can come back, but we should

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Speaker 1: just kill them because they'll be better off dead. I

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Speaker 1: would say that's murder. It's murder. We're not talking about that.

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Speaker 1: They haven't been convicted of a crime, and they're not

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Speaker 1: on death row here right, This isn't capital punishment. It's murder.

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Speaker 1: Even if they are agreeing to it, they are agreeing

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Speaker 1: to the murder of their own body. And so here's

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Speaker 1: my point. That's just the static look at it, that's

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Speaker 1: the the overall look at it. But if you dig

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Speaker 1: deeper in it, you're saying, even if you're the person

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Speaker 1: agreeing to this, you're saying, I I know, I am certain,

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Speaker 1: I am positive this is a fact that I have

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Speaker 1: nothing left that matters that is worthy of living for

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Speaker 1: that I am certain of this, right, And here's the truth.

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Speaker 1: You're not certain of that. You don't know. You don't

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Speaker 1: know when your last breath will be. You don't know

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Speaker 1: what might happen. You don't know who you can affect

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Speaker 1: in a positive way. You don't know what your story

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Speaker 1: could do for someone else. Even if you're terminally ill,

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Speaker 1: and the doctor says you have weeks or hours, you

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Speaker 1: don't know when your final breath is coming, meaning you

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Speaker 1: don't know if you still matter. That's just the coldest

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Speaker 1: way I could say it. But that's what I'm trying.

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Speaker 1: That's my point. I'm trying to make you don't know.

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Speaker 1: And because you don't know, you think you know, and

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Speaker 1: you want to you want to pull the plug on yourself.

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Speaker 1: That's murdering yourself, right. Physician assisted that's what however you

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Speaker 1: want to look at it, whatever the sweetest term is.

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Speaker 1: I believe that is murder, even if it's consented by

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Speaker 1: the person. Okay, I don't think there's much more to say.

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Speaker 1: I think that's a tragedy. Let's got another question here,

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Speaker 1: Suvid client says grief and regret. Hey, Grangeer, love your podcast. Man.

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Speaker 1: My name is Jonah. I'm sixteen years old. Really appreciate

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Speaker 1: what you do. Over these past years, I've been struggling

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Speaker 1: with the sudden and unexpected death of my grandpa. Now,

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Speaker 1: my grandpa has suffered from a head trauma and this

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Speaker 1: affected his body for the rest of his life. This

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Speaker 1: meant he had to relearn a lot of basic needs. Miraculously,

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Speaker 1: he ended up living twenty plus years, longer than what

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Speaker 1: we were told, and he was able to watch his

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Speaker 1: grandchildren grow up. My family and I had the blessing

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Speaker 1: of living have him living with us for the past

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Speaker 1: two years of his life. My grandpa was always in

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Speaker 1: and out of the hospital and we were never expected

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Speaker 1: anything bad that might happen to him. He was a

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Speaker 1: tough guy. When my grandpa went into the hospital with

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Speaker 1: a stomach ache, we thought he'd be out soon. About

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Speaker 1: a week or two so later. He had two heart

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Speaker 1: attacks and machines were keeping him alive. We had to

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Speaker 1: let him go. His body was very weak and he

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Speaker 1: was ready. That's different than assisted suicide. Right, Okay, that's different.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about two different scenarios. I just had to

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Speaker 1: had to interject and say that that's different. In some

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Speaker 1: then it's different. Let me just stop right here and

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Speaker 1: separate these two questions, because this is a different scenario.

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Speaker 1: If you're if you're on a life support machine and

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Speaker 1: you're you're battling, and you say say turn the machine off,

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Speaker 1: let me breathe my own power, let me see my

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Speaker 1: family on my own power, that's different. That's not physician

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Speaker 1: assisted suicide. Right, Okay, back to the question. During the

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Speaker 1: time in the hospital, I was I was never bothered

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Speaker 1: calling him or sent even a thoughtful text because I

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Speaker 1: had thought he had come home, and I would struggle

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Speaker 1: forgiving myself for that. I'm not sure quite what that means.

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Speaker 1: His services gave me a little closure knowing that he

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Speaker 1: was gone and that he's in a better place without

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Speaker 1: any pain. But I wish I had made more of

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Speaker 1: an effort to talk to someone Okay, I see what

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Speaker 1: he's saying. He didn't talk to anybody during this who

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Speaker 1: probably wanted nothing more than to talk about talk to

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Speaker 1: one of the people he loved the most while he

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Speaker 1: was there. I know my grandpa loved me and he

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Speaker 1: would want he would not want me to be upset

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Speaker 1: over this, But I just can't help but think about it.

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Speaker 1: I still expect him to come home. Sometimes it still

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Speaker 1: doesn't feel real. I hate going back to normal without

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Speaker 1: him in my life. There's always something missing without him. Here.

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Speaker 1: Any advice. Okay, Jonah, sixteen years old, lost your grandpa

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Speaker 1: and this is over the past year. Okay, got it

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Speaker 1: all right, brother, let's dive into this. I want to

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Speaker 1: tell you something. I'm gonna tell everybody something. Grandpa's die.

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Speaker 1: I have to say that sometimes on this podcast because

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Speaker 1: it almost feels like sometimes people forget but Grandpa's die.

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Speaker 1: And you might be thinking, Ah, come on, man, give

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Speaker 1: me some wisdom here. But what I mean is sometimes

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Speaker 1: I want to say, Jonah, if we were riding in

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Speaker 1: the truck together, I'd say, Jonah, gonna ask you a question, buddy.

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Speaker 1: You say up in here in the top of your question,

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Speaker 1: you're saying, we never expected anything bad to happen to him.

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Speaker 1: He was a tough guy, that's what you said. And

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Speaker 1: so if you were riding in the truck with me,

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Speaker 1: I'd say, Jonah, did you think he wasn't going to die?

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Speaker 1: Did you think he was going to outlive you? Now,

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Speaker 1: that sounds so simple, but sometimes we need to process

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Speaker 1: simple things before we get deep and get on a

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Speaker 1: deep level. Here, we just got to process some simple things,

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Speaker 1: like Grandpa always was going to die, and he was

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Speaker 1: going to die for some reason or another at some

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Speaker 1: point in time. Now, in a scenario like this, we

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Speaker 1: could have guessed that he would live a couple more years.

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Speaker 1: We could have guessed that he was going to die

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Speaker 1: twenty years before this. But the bottom line is, Jonah,

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Speaker 1: he was gonna die. And there is something about that

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Speaker 1: that's helpful in these discussions. It's like sometimes we're surprised

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Speaker 1: by death, you know, like, oh, man, I just don't

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Speaker 1: know what to do. Grandpa died, and I have sympathy

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Speaker 1: for that. I've lost two grandpas, I've lost a dad.

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Speaker 1: I have sympathy for that, and I've lost many other

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Speaker 1: people in my life, but specifically speaking to the patriarchs

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Speaker 1: in my family, have lost two grandpa's and a dad,

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Speaker 1: and sometimes you have to come to grips that dads

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Speaker 1: are going to die. Grandpa's are going to die. And

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Speaker 1: when you know that, and you believe that, and you

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Speaker 1: understand that, then you could move the level too of

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Speaker 1: the grief. You could move on and instead of being

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Speaker 1: stuck in the surprise that they're not here anymore. I

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Speaker 1: remember when Dad died. I remember the next morning the

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Speaker 1: sun came up after because he died. I found out

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Speaker 1: that night before. Mom found him after a heart attack,

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Speaker 1: and he was sixty one, so unexpected, there were no

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Speaker 1: prior health issues. Mom just found him asleep in the chair.

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Speaker 1: He was gone, massive heart attack. The next morning, the

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Speaker 1: sun came up, and Jonah, just like your email, I

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Speaker 1: remember thinking, man, the sun comes up without Dad, legitimate thought.

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Speaker 1: I remember going out to the road and seeing cars

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Speaker 1: driving and I was like, huh, people are driving around

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Speaker 1: living their lives in a world without Dad here. I

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Speaker 1: mean that sounds crazy to someone that has never experienced this,

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Speaker 1: But someone that's going through grief, someone that Jonah, you

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Speaker 1: know you lost your grandpa, someone that has been through it,

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Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, it's weird, Like people live lives without

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Speaker 1: your loved one. Here the sun still comes up and

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Speaker 1: it goes back down again. One day gone, one day

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Speaker 1: gone without Dad in it. In my life, that's strange

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Speaker 1: for you, jonaht your grandpa, and I remember feeling the

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Speaker 1: same thing with my grandpa. But these are good things

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Speaker 1: to process through. It's good things to realize that the

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Speaker 1: sun comes up and it goes back down, and there

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Speaker 1: is a rhythm to it, and there's a rhythm to

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Speaker 1: this world. There's a rhythm to this planet, to this universe.

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Speaker 1: There is a there was a timing to it, there

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Speaker 1: is a pattern to it, and we could trust it.

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Speaker 1: You could trust that son's gonna come back up. God

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Speaker 1: has given us a perfect rhythm that we could rely on,

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Speaker 1: and death is part of that rhythm. And once we

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Speaker 1: feel that and we're flowing with it, it's easier to

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Speaker 1: get past the shock and surprise of it. As if

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Speaker 1: we thought that maybe this time, this not this grandpa,

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Speaker 1: This grandpa was gonna live forever, Like I know, Grandpa's died, Granger,

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Speaker 1: but this one, you don't know. This one. He was tough,

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Speaker 1: he was gonna live past me. I say no, no,

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Speaker 1: he didn't make it either. You'll get that money. We'll

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Speaker 1: take a break there of that. Thank you for listening

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Speaker 1: to the podcast. You know, my book Like a River

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Speaker 1: comes out August first. I just I can't say enough

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Speaker 1: how excited I am for at least the conversation starter.

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Speaker 1: So many of these emails that come in are about

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Speaker 1: grief and loss and about my story, and I just

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Speaker 1: I want so badly just to say, read the book,

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Speaker 1: get back to me, let's discuss. So that happens on

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Speaker 1: August the first, and you can pre order right now

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Speaker 1: from grangersmith dot com. That's gonna kind of kick you

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Speaker 1: out to all the different places that sell books. You

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Speaker 1: can get it anywhere that sells books, but grangersmith dot

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Speaker 1: com can be the hub for that. And then also

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Speaker 1: you could get a free chapter right away whenever you

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Speaker 1: do it. So pre order right now and then the

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Speaker 1: book Like a River comes out August the first. If

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Speaker 1: you need to get a hold of me right now,

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00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,520
Speaker 1: if you want me to send you a video message

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Speaker 1: of me saying happy birthday or happy Annavertree or whatever

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Speaker 1: the message might be, cameo dot com slash grangersmith is

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00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: a great way to do that. You could also download

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00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 1: the cameo app and search for me Granger Smith. I

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Speaker 1: will then send you a video message according to whatever

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Speaker 1: you want me to say it to who whatever you

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Speaker 1: want me to say it too. It's a great way,

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Speaker 1: uh to keep in touch, get a little last minute

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Speaker 1: gift if you forgot something right again. That's Cameo dot

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Speaker 1: com slash Granger Smith. Back to the podcast last break,

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Speaker 1: I said this is episode one. I believe this is

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Speaker 1: one ninety three. Actually, wow, we're almost two one hundred

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Speaker 1: and seven, shy, I have one hundred episodes. I mean

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Speaker 1: two hundred episodes. This is how fast it goes by

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Speaker 1: for me. You can believe this two hundred episodes. That's crazy.

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Speaker 1: I'm answering your questions. You email me Grangersmith podcast at

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Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Love to hear from you, love to

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Speaker 1: walk through something with you. And I'm gonna just kind

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Speaker 1: of slide this thing down and find me a question,

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Speaker 1: a random one. Have not checked these before? Boom, here

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Speaker 1: we go, it says, hey, Granger love the podcast. You

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Speaker 1: have so much wisdom. I don't know about that. I'm

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Speaker 1: twenty eight years old from i Mac Washington, home to

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Speaker 1: the world famous suicide race. I grew up in a

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Speaker 1: family that went to church every week, but I never

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Speaker 1: had a good relationship with God. Just recently I started

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Speaker 1: to pray and listen to my Bible more. It is

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Speaker 1: amazing how God has changed my heart in the last

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Speaker 1: couple months. How do I pray for a future spouse

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Speaker 1: without making it about me? God has blessed a small

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Speaker 1: construction electrical company I just started. But how do I

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Speaker 1: make sure I'm doing the things I need to be

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Speaker 1: doing as a man of God? All right, Matt, this

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Speaker 1: is that's your name, Matt. I shout out to beautiful Washington,

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Speaker 1: and I appreciate you opening up, buddy. Yeah, praise God

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Speaker 1: for his work in you and what He has done

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Speaker 1: for you and in the eyes he has opened. And

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Speaker 1: I want to dive into your question. I got to

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Speaker 1: you kind of at the last part of your email.

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Speaker 1: You kind of shot a couple questions out. How do

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Speaker 1: I pray for a future spouse without making it about

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Speaker 1: my timing? And how do I make sure I'm doing

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Speaker 1: the things related to your business then I need to

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Speaker 1: be doing as a man of God. Great man, great

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Speaker 1: questions to be thinking about. And I don't necessarily think

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Speaker 1: you're you're specifically talking about any of these things. I

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Speaker 1: think you're just mainly thinking about life in general. How

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Speaker 1: do I be a disciple? Like how do I serve

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Speaker 1: God right? How do I make sure that that I'm

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Speaker 1: not getting caught up and like building a company and

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Speaker 1: getting lost and power and greed in the world and

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Speaker 1: finding a spouse just because because she's satisfying something in

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Speaker 1: me and I'm not finding the right girl for the

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Speaker 1: right round. You're just you're walking a good path. And

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Speaker 1: I think that just just asking these kind of questions,

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Speaker 1: just talking about this stuff is good. It's healthy, and

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Speaker 1: I have faith in you. I have faith that you're

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Speaker 1: You're not going to mess this stuff up. You say,

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Speaker 1: how do I pray for a future spouse without making

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Speaker 1: it about my timing? I say that that God, you

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Speaker 1: know my heart, you know my desire. I want a wife.

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Speaker 1: I want one and I want one now. But God,

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Speaker 1: don't make it about my timing. It's yours. Let it

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Speaker 1: be about your timing. Let your will be done, not mine.

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Speaker 1: Crush my intentions for someone that I want right now.

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Speaker 1: When you bring me someone, you'll bring her at the

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Speaker 1: right time. But at the same time, you know me

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Speaker 1: and you know that I'm anxious, and I want one

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Speaker 1: right now because everyone else has one? God, will you

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Speaker 1: relieve that temptation in me? Will you suppress that? Will

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Speaker 1: you help me manage that where I'm responsibly looking and dating.

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Speaker 1: But I'm not longing too much for something right here

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Speaker 1: and now, because that's what my flesh wants, something right

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Speaker 1: here now. But God, God, will you give me patience

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Speaker 1: in this now? You gotta be careful when you pray

424
00:26:57,040 --> 00:27:02,360
Speaker 1: for patience. Guess how God grants that with extending things

425
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:06,120
Speaker 1: a long time, because how do you learn patience by

426
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 1: overcoming long periods of time? But I think it's a

427
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 1: good prayer, and I think it's a good thought. And

428
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:12,159
Speaker 1: then the second part is how do I make sure

429
00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 1: I'm doing the right things to be a man of God. Well,

430
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:19,360
Speaker 1: I put your study of God, you're reading the Bible,

431
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 1: your prayer life, your church life. I would put that

432
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 1: in a position in your time block and time in

433
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,639
Speaker 1: your world. I put all that stuff in your world

434
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:33,400
Speaker 1: in a prominent place. So when you look across your

435
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:37,760
Speaker 1: week or day to day, you go, if someone else

436
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:41,160
Speaker 1: took an inventory of my day, if someone took an

437
00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:44,879
Speaker 1: inventory of my time, they said, hey, Granger, give me

438
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:49,239
Speaker 1: give me a list of everything you did today, and

439
00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 1: then give me a seven day list of everything you

440
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:53,600
Speaker 1: did this week. Give me the list and we're going

441
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:56,240
Speaker 1: to audit it. We're going to take a complete inventory

442
00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,520
Speaker 1: of your time and we're going to audit it, and

443
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:02,920
Speaker 1: we'll give you a a database back that shows you

444
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: what is most important in your life. Think about, Think

445
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: about someone did that for you. What results would you

446
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 1: get back? This just non biased company from the outside

447
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,479
Speaker 1: takes an inventory of your life. What what would they

448
00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 1: tell you? What you Matt, What you want them to

449
00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:26,159
Speaker 1: do is Matt sure loves his God. He put this

450
00:28:26,280 --> 00:28:28,719
Speaker 1: much time into doing this. He reads his Bible, this

451
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,679
Speaker 1: much time. He goes to church, he serves his church,

452
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:35,479
Speaker 1: he does he studies this. He he's on his knees

453
00:28:35,520 --> 00:28:38,040
Speaker 1: praying for this. And look how much time he's doing it.

454
00:28:38,080 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 1: I guess this guy really loves his God. That's what

455
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:43,960
Speaker 1: you want. Whatever it takes to do that to get

456
00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 1: that result back from this biased, unbiased company. Do that.

457
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:58,680
Speaker 1: Sliding through some more emails here, I'll go to this

458
00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:02,240
Speaker 1: one right here. This one came in yesterday. A subdecline

459
00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:10,440
Speaker 1: says f U L l I NG fooling the Lord's Will.

460
00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:14,880
Speaker 1: That's what the subdecline says, Hey, Grangderman. Name is Kyla Walters.

461
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 1: I'm a mother of two. My son just graduated from

462
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:21,880
Speaker 1: high school. He's a musician and he just started out

463
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:25,600
Speaker 1: very young singing for the Lord, and now he's gotten

464
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,320
Speaker 1: older and he loves acoustic country. As a mom, I'm

465
00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:34,480
Speaker 1: struggling to know if me supporting him is disappointing to him.

466
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 1: I see you Russell Dickerson, Walker Hayes, who have a

467
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 1: love for the Lord and play these concerts with people

468
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 1: drinking and everything else. I feel guilty as a mom

469
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:46,680
Speaker 1: encouraging him as he plays for weddings, wineries and tons

470
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:51,560
Speaker 1: of events Like should I really truly feel guilty. He's

471
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 1: a great kid with a great head on his shoulders,

472
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:57,800
Speaker 1: and he would love to make this his full time career.

473
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 1: But you are stepping away from music to pursue the

474
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:05,240
Speaker 1: Lord's Will. And I hope that one day he will

475
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:08,040
Speaker 1: as well. He loves Jesus too, but his passion right

476
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 1: now is country. I'm probably saying all of this not

477
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,040
Speaker 1: the right way, but I need some advice from yours

478
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 1: or thoughts to a mom who loves the Lord and

479
00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:20,760
Speaker 1: does what she can to serve the Lord is what

480
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:27,840
Speaker 1: he's doing pleasing in the Lord's eyes. Kayla Walters, Yeah,

481
00:30:27,880 --> 00:30:30,800
Speaker 1: I think that's Kayla. I think it might be Kyla,

482
00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:37,000
Speaker 1: Kylo Walters. I'll call you Kyla, Kyla, Kyla. Thank you,

483
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:40,440
Speaker 1: sweet mama, for emailing me about your son. You love

484
00:30:40,440 --> 00:30:43,800
Speaker 1: your son. You are concerned about your son. You're hoping

485
00:30:43,800 --> 00:30:49,040
Speaker 1: he's on the right path. And look, I'm gonna give

486
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:50,960
Speaker 1: you a little bit of a warning here. Don't helicopter

487
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:57,400
Speaker 1: this boy. Don't helicopter parent this boy. The greatest gift

488
00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:00,360
Speaker 1: you can give him is to raise him up in

489
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:03,000
Speaker 1: the Lord and preach him the Gospel, and then let

490
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:08,560
Speaker 1: him fly. Give him freedom, don't don't micro manage what

491
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:11,600
Speaker 1: he's doing his choicest look at Look at it this way.

492
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:16,520
Speaker 1: You're looking at me saying, Granger, you love the Lord,

493
00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 1: and you are giving up music, stepping away to pursue

494
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:22,760
Speaker 1: the Lord's will. You want me to tell you about

495
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:27,200
Speaker 1: my mom. My mom supported me to go into music.

496
00:31:27,800 --> 00:31:31,960
Speaker 1: She prayed for me. Pray for your son. Pray for

497
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:34,880
Speaker 1: your son. Don't tell him what to do. Don't don't

498
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,800
Speaker 1: tell him he's wrong. Don't tell him that what he's

499
00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 1: doing is not pleasing in the Lord's eyes. Because if

500
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:45,120
Speaker 1: he's if he's doing what he loves and he's doing

501
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 1: it with passion and praising God while he's doing it,

502
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: then we need men like him in country music. I'm

503
00:31:52,320 --> 00:31:55,680
Speaker 1: a different story. I don't want people to start hearing

504
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 1: my story and be like, see, if you're a Christian,

505
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,360
Speaker 1: you should leave country music. That's not the It's not

506
00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:04,120
Speaker 1: what I'm trying to represent here. I have an interesting story.

507
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:10,320
Speaker 1: I have an interesting and interesting calling right and even then,

508
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 1: I'm just serving my little I got a little local

509
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:17,200
Speaker 1: church I go to and my pastors are teaching me

510
00:32:17,320 --> 00:32:20,280
Speaker 1: and leading me, and they will eventually affirm over me

511
00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 1: what is going on with my life. So I'm not

512
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:28,120
Speaker 1: self deceived in that way. But that's a different story.

513
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:29,960
Speaker 1: If your son is a Christian and he loves the

514
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:32,680
Speaker 1: Lord and he loves country music, let him go do

515
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 1: that and be what he needs to be in that

516
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 1: industry he meaning God. Let God put him in whatever

517
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:43,800
Speaker 1: industry God needs him to be in, and if he

518
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 1: gets called out of it, he'll get called out of it.

519
00:32:45,720 --> 00:32:48,120
Speaker 1: But what you could do right now is just love him,

520
00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 1: just support him, tell him you're so pleased with him.

521
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:56,160
Speaker 1: Now there's limits to that. We'll see what he does,

522
00:32:56,240 --> 00:33:01,200
Speaker 1: but for the most part, support him because it could

523
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 1: It could hurt you if you don't. He could he

524
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 1: could start resenting you, or not wanting to call you

525
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 1: on the phone, or think that you're just judging him

526
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:13,800
Speaker 1: all the time for for what he wants to do.

527
00:33:13,880 --> 00:33:18,560
Speaker 1: But just let the boy fly. Let the boy fly.

528
00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:25,680
Speaker 1: You gave him wings. Let him fly. Next. Next question,

529
00:33:25,720 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 1: subject line says a girl question, Hey Granger, thanks for

530
00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:31,200
Speaker 1: doing the podcast and the time that you put into it.

531
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:33,240
Speaker 1: I'll try to keep this short if you don't mind,

532
00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:36,720
Speaker 1: I'd like to stay anonymous. From an eighteen year old

533
00:33:36,760 --> 00:33:41,520
Speaker 1: guy from Slave Lake, Alberta, Canada. I tried to ask

534
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:44,640
Speaker 1: a girl if she wanted to do something for dinner.

535
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 1: That was the words I used to ask her out,

536
00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 1: he says. We went and it went well, but it

537
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 1: was clear she only viewed me as another friend in town.

538
00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:58,440
Speaker 1: I was okay with this, but it gave me some

539
00:33:58,600 --> 00:34:01,560
Speaker 1: questions for the future when I ask a girl out,

540
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:04,840
Speaker 1: girl out? When I ask a girl out, what do

541
00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 1: I say to make it clear about my intentions? Should

542
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:13,520
Speaker 1: I say? Should I say it? When I ask her,

543
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,680
Speaker 1: or go out a couple of times with her first,

544
00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:21,000
Speaker 1: and then ask her. God blessing. Thanks okay, Anonymous, Thanks brother,

545
00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:26,359
Speaker 1: and I am I'm tracking with you here. I'm following you.

546
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:31,200
Speaker 1: You asked girl out and you're eighteen, and you went

547
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:33,719
Speaker 1: out and it was fun, good, but she just looked

548
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:37,320
Speaker 1: at you as another friend in town. But now you're thinking,

549
00:34:38,480 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 1: where did I go wrong? That she thought I was

550
00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 1: just a friend, because I'm not. I don't want to

551
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:49,760
Speaker 1: be just a friend. Okay, cool, good question. Definitely something

552
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:53,759
Speaker 1: that they don't teach you in school, something that an

553
00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:57,759
Speaker 1: eighteen year old is going to learn from experience or

554
00:34:57,800 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 1: from the Grangersmith podcast. Possibly, if you like a girl

555
00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:10,839
Speaker 1: like I'm assuming you did with this one, you're not

556
00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:12,640
Speaker 1: gonna You're not gonna tell her that when you ask

557
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:14,960
Speaker 1: her out. That was part of your question. Should I

558
00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:18,160
Speaker 1: say it when I ask her, or go out a

559
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:22,520
Speaker 1: couple times first and then ask her? I would say,

560
00:35:22,680 --> 00:35:26,520
Speaker 1: if you're first of all, ladies, ladies, ladies, If you're

561
00:35:26,520 --> 00:35:30,080
Speaker 1: eighteen and a boy says you want to go out

562
00:35:30,120 --> 00:35:34,480
Speaker 1: to dinner, let's not assume this is just another friend

563
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,319
Speaker 1: in town asking you out for dinner. Let's just get

564
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,480
Speaker 1: that straight. Come on, come on. So part of my

565
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:44,359
Speaker 1: answer to you, anonymous, is she knew. There's no way

566
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:48,400
Speaker 1: she didn't know. But the way that you know that

567
00:35:48,480 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 1: she knows is by verbalizing it. So you're at dinner

568
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:56,920
Speaker 1: and everything's going good and super casual, you say something

569
00:35:57,080 --> 00:36:06,719
Speaker 1: like to be up front so that I don't lead

570
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:10,919
Speaker 1: people on, or so that people might just in case

571
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:13,719
Speaker 1: they might get the wrong impression. I just want to

572
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:18,000
Speaker 1: tell you that. And this is a little embarrassing saying

573
00:36:18,000 --> 00:36:20,879
Speaker 1: it out loud, but I just think you're a really

574
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:22,880
Speaker 1: great girl, and I'd like to get to know you

575
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:25,920
Speaker 1: a little bit better. This is as simple as that.

576
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 1: Like you don't have to say my heart is melting

577
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:31,000
Speaker 1: for you, or you are the most beautiful maiden I've

578
00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:34,360
Speaker 1: ever seen. You just say that was a little embarrassing,

579
00:36:34,360 --> 00:36:36,080
Speaker 1: but I just want to be upfront, just so you

580
00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:38,800
Speaker 1: know that I just from what I could tell, I

581
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:41,440
Speaker 1: think you're a really neat girl and just like to

582
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:44,880
Speaker 1: get to know you better. She's gonna know, right then, Okay,

583
00:36:44,920 --> 00:36:47,000
Speaker 1: this is what he's saying. He's drawing a line in

584
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: the sand, he's laying it out for me. And then

585
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 1: how she responds, that's that's determines if you you know

586
00:36:53,719 --> 00:36:58,840
Speaker 1: what happens next she might say. She might say, oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

587
00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:02,960
Speaker 1: I get it now, I'm sorry. I thought we were

588
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:06,200
Speaker 1: just friends. And so I'm glad you said that because

589
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:12,120
Speaker 1: now this is awkward. But and you'll you'll go, oh, totally, well,

590
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 1: let's finish a meal and I'll get you back, right.

591
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:19,399
Speaker 1: I mean weird, but that's good. And then the other

592
00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:23,360
Speaker 1: way is the other thing is you know, she goes, well,

593
00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:26,560
Speaker 1: it's funny you say that, because I think you're you're

594
00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:28,360
Speaker 1: kind of a neat guy too, and i'd like to

595
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 1: get to know you. Boom. Now you're off to phase two,

596
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 1: you know, and it's like, well, maybe we should do

597
00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:41,400
Speaker 1: this again sometime. How's Wednesday? Yeah, Wednesday's good? Okay, cool, great,

598
00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:44,920
Speaker 1: see Wednesday. Great, It's really good. If you do this,

599
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 1: it's it's pulling off a band aid in some sort

600
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:50,320
Speaker 1: and and it's it might be it's definitely a little

601
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:54,319
Speaker 1: socially awkward to do it, but but it should go

602
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:56,919
Speaker 1: without saying that. If she says yes to a dinner

603
00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:00,680
Speaker 1: date on it with one guy going dinner. If she

604
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:04,399
Speaker 1: says yes, to your invitation. She is being set up

605
00:38:04,560 --> 00:38:06,640
Speaker 1: for you to ask a question like this, so you're

606
00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:09,520
Speaker 1: not wrong to ask her if you if you tracked

607
00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:12,040
Speaker 1: her down, she's like doing a jog in the park

608
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:15,680
Speaker 1: and you tracked her down in the park and he said, hey, hey, Hey,

609
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,480
Speaker 1: can you stop one second. Hey, I think you're a

610
00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:19,799
Speaker 1: really neat girl and I'd like to get to know

611
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:22,279
Speaker 1: you a little bit better. Then then that's weird. Right

612
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:26,000
Speaker 1: Then she'd be like weird, get away from me. But

613
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:29,640
Speaker 1: if she says yes to your dinner invitation and she's

614
00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 1: sitting with you one on one on a dinner date,

615
00:38:33,160 --> 00:38:35,919
Speaker 1: and then it's okay to ask a question like that's

616
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:41,680
Speaker 1: not awkward. At least it shouldn't be. Wish you're the

617
00:38:41,719 --> 00:38:46,799
Speaker 1: best brother. Let's go another question here at subject line,

618
00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 1: and this one says death and new life trials and faith.

619
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:52,560
Speaker 1: Hey Granger, thanks for taking time to read this. My

620
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:55,640
Speaker 1: family has been facing a roller coaster of events recently

621
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:57,719
Speaker 1: and i'd love to get your advice on the situation.

622
00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 1: On April eighth, my wife's parents were in a tragic

623
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:06,799
Speaker 1: snow bill snowmobile accident where we unexpectedly lost her mother.

624
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:11,080
Speaker 1: Three days later, my wife, who was thirty six weeks pregnant,

625
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 1: went into labor and welcomed our third child. Fast forward

626
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:21,080
Speaker 1: to April twentieth, our baby experienced a random abnick episode.

627
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:24,479
Speaker 1: Sorry I don't know what that means, and was rushed

628
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 1: to the children's hospital that day before the funeral. Fortunately,

629
00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:31,040
Speaker 1: he returned home a few days ago and is now

630
00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 1: doing fine. But my wife is struggling to cope with

631
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:37,800
Speaker 1: everything that has happened and has started questioning her faith.

632
00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:43,200
Speaker 1: I've been trying to stay close to scripture to help

633
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 1: myself navigate this, but I'm struggling to figure out how

634
00:39:46,040 --> 00:39:49,000
Speaker 1: to help my wife navigate her doubts. I remember in

635
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:52,680
Speaker 1: a previous episode you mentioned turning the why questions into

636
00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:56,560
Speaker 1: what questions. I think that is relevant to the situation,

637
00:39:56,640 --> 00:40:00,719
Speaker 1: but I'm unsure how to guide her to that. Do

638
00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:03,399
Speaker 1: you have any advice on what I can do as

639
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:06,160
Speaker 1: a husband to support my wife through this way in

640
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 1: a way that helps her restore her faith. I appreciate

641
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:13,040
Speaker 1: any advice you have. Thanks for all you do, Den Devin,

642
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 1: great question man, Thank you, Thank you for emailing and

643
00:40:21,080 --> 00:40:23,720
Speaker 1: open it up in this way, and I hope you're listening. Now.

644
00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:28,360
Speaker 1: Let me start with your very last thing that you said,

645
00:40:28,560 --> 00:40:30,440
Speaker 1: just this is an encouragement. The very last thing you

646
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:34,239
Speaker 1: said was, do you have any advice on what I

647
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:36,439
Speaker 1: can do as a husband to support my wife through

648
00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: this in a way that helps restore her faith. Well,

649
00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:42,520
Speaker 1: you just need to know, as an encouragement to you

650
00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:46,319
Speaker 1: that you can't restore her faith. And I hope you

651
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:49,680
Speaker 1: know that you can't do it. That's a good thing,

652
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,920
Speaker 1: Like praise God. You don't have the power to restore

653
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:58,080
Speaker 1: her faith. Okay, God does that, so that takes the

654
00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:02,120
Speaker 1: pressure off. What you can do is support her. That's

655
00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:05,839
Speaker 1: the other word you used. Good. You support her, but

656
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:09,880
Speaker 1: you can't restore her. Okay, say that. Please say that

657
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 1: to yourself, preach that to yourself. I can support her,

658
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:16,840
Speaker 1: but I can't restore her. There's things I can do,

659
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:23,560
Speaker 1: and I will, and I'll go tirelessly until I see

660
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 1: some results with her. I will. I will pour myself

661
00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:31,719
Speaker 1: into her and support, support, support, but I cannot, as

662
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:38,080
Speaker 1: a man, do the restoring. It's so good to know that, right,

663
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:41,600
Speaker 1: It's so good just to know that. It puts you

664
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 1: in a better position because now you're setting yourself up

665
00:41:44,719 --> 00:41:47,359
Speaker 1: for success, not failure, because if you set yourself up

666
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:50,440
Speaker 1: to restore her, you will fail, and then you'll feel

667
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:54,600
Speaker 1: like a failure. Okay, let's dive into this tragedy has

668
00:41:54,600 --> 00:42:01,360
Speaker 1: struck your family in a couple different ways, this snowmobile accident.

669
00:42:01,440 --> 00:42:07,200
Speaker 1: It's terrible and I'm so sorry. This is April eighth.

670
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 1: That's positive. If there is a positive in this, it's

671
00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:15,520
Speaker 1: that it was on April eighth, because as I'm reading this,

672
00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:22,000
Speaker 1: we're only a couple months after that. That's good. Meaning

673
00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:24,640
Speaker 1: if this was ten years later, that's a problem. That's

674
00:42:24,680 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 1: another problem. We address it in a different way. But

675
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:29,879
Speaker 1: we're just a few months and so first of all,

676
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:33,919
Speaker 1: I just want you to remember that as a husband,

677
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:38,960
Speaker 1: as her best friend, what you're gonna do now is

678
00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:44,960
Speaker 1: just be there and listen. Be there and listen and support.

679
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:47,839
Speaker 1: Don't You don't have to have magic words, you don't

680
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:51,520
Speaker 1: have to fix things, be on guard so that you

681
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:53,880
Speaker 1: could have here's the Bible. Oh, here's the scripture that

682
00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:56,719
Speaker 1: here you go. This is what you need, and we

683
00:42:56,719 --> 00:42:58,000
Speaker 1: need to go out and we need to do this

684
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:00,840
Speaker 1: therapy together. We need to do me You're only a

685
00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:05,239
Speaker 1: couple months out from a really crazy month and you're

686
00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:07,799
Speaker 1: just gonna be You're just gonna be there to sit

687
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:11,520
Speaker 1: with her, just sit with her. Now, this is not empathy.

688
00:43:12,120 --> 00:43:15,960
Speaker 1: Empathy is she's sinking in the quicksand and you get

689
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:17,839
Speaker 1: both feet and you jump in the quicksand with her,

690
00:43:17,880 --> 00:43:19,680
Speaker 1: and you hold her and you say, well, let's just

691
00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:23,440
Speaker 1: go down together, baby. This is sympathy. And this is different.

692
00:43:23,840 --> 00:43:26,759
Speaker 1: Sympathy is she's sinking in the quicksand you got one

693
00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:30,799
Speaker 1: foot on dry land rock, and then you got one

694
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 1: foot in the sand with her, and you grab her

695
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,960
Speaker 1: arm and you say, I'm with you. I'm here in

696
00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:38,480
Speaker 1: the quicksand with you. I feel you, but I also

697
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:41,640
Speaker 1: got one foot in the rock and I am here

698
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 1: to help pull you out. Right. That's sympathy versus empathy.

699
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:48,640
Speaker 1: We need to make sure that we know the difference here.

700
00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:54,120
Speaker 1: So we got sitting with her, We've got supporting her,

701
00:43:54,239 --> 00:43:57,800
Speaker 1: we got listening to her. And then I want you

702
00:43:57,840 --> 00:44:04,480
Speaker 1: to know something. I say this in almost every podcast,

703
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:11,799
Speaker 1: but it's it's so important to to show what we

704
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:14,440
Speaker 1: what sometimes we're missing in the Christian faith, and that

705
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:19,680
Speaker 1: is lamenting we miss as Christians, as modern day Christians,

706
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:26,800
Speaker 1: we miss the part of the Bible that's that's about lamenting, right. Instead,

707
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:31,440
Speaker 1: we tend to talk in Christianese and I can't stand it.

708
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 1: I can't stand talk the Christianese talk. Oh, you need

709
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:41,560
Speaker 1: to just stand on first, Peter. Make sure that you

710
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:45,279
Speaker 1: are always you know, make the Lord is the foundation

711
00:44:45,480 --> 00:44:48,160
Speaker 1: of what it's like. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Man. I'm just

712
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:52,440
Speaker 1: I'm just sad right now. I'm just sad. So if

713
00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:54,600
Speaker 1: you do that, you're missing the lament of the Bible.

714
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:56,959
Speaker 1: And it's such a big part that we're supposed to see.

715
00:44:56,960 --> 00:45:00,359
Speaker 1: Look at this Psalm thirteen. Okay, Psalm thirteen. I'm read

716
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:02,719
Speaker 1: the whole thing real quick, just so we could remember

717
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:05,239
Speaker 1: the lament of the Bible. And we see a lot

718
00:45:05,280 --> 00:45:08,400
Speaker 1: of this in the Psalms. Look verse one. How long,

719
00:45:08,880 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 1: O Lord, will you forget me forever? How long will

720
00:45:15,040 --> 00:45:19,400
Speaker 1: you hide your face from me? How long must I

721
00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:24,440
Speaker 1: take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my

722
00:45:24,600 --> 00:45:29,320
Speaker 1: heart all day? How long shall my enemy be exalted

723
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:32,880
Speaker 1: over me? Consider and answer me, O, Lord, my God,

724
00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:37,000
Speaker 1: lift up my eyes lest I sleep the sleep of death.

725
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:40,680
Speaker 1: Lest my enemy say I have prevailed over him, Lest

726
00:45:40,680 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 1: my foes rejoice because I am shaken. Watch the switch

727
00:45:46,120 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 1: in verse five. But I have trusted in your steadfast love.

728
00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:55,560
Speaker 1: My heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing

729
00:45:55,680 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 1: to the Lord because he has dealt bountifully with me. Okay,

730
00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:05,800
Speaker 1: so we see the lament, the felt reality. This is

731
00:46:05,840 --> 00:46:09,400
Speaker 1: what I feel. Oh God, how long will you forgive

732
00:46:09,520 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 1: me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?

733
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:16,959
Speaker 1: Because right now my family is struggling. How long, oh Lord?

734
00:46:18,040 --> 00:46:20,000
Speaker 1: And then you make sure that you get that one

735
00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:22,320
Speaker 1: foot on the rock right, one foot in the sand,

736
00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 1: one foot on the rock. But I have trusted in

737
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:30,240
Speaker 1: your steadfast love. My heart shall rejoice in your salvation.

738
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 1: So important, y'all. And then we go to one of

739
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:39,720
Speaker 1: the famous ones. Psal I'm twenty two, He says, My God,

740
00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:44,719
Speaker 1: my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you

741
00:46:44,880 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 1: so far from saving me from the words of my groaning? Oh?

742
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:52,360
Speaker 1: My God, I cry by day but you do not answer,

743
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:58,680
Speaker 1: And by night but I find no rest. Yet you

744
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:03,840
Speaker 1: are holy, enthroned on the praises of Israel. Right that

745
00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:06,080
Speaker 1: you see the switch, You're in the sand, and you

746
00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:09,960
Speaker 1: got one foot on the rock. Jesus affirms this. On

747
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 1: the cross. Jesus says this, my God, my God, why

748
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:17,520
Speaker 1: have you forsaken me? It's like he's singing the first

749
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 1: verse of a famous song. He's affirming that David was

750
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:23,719
Speaker 1: right in his heart to lament, So don't forget. We

751
00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:28,200
Speaker 1: cannot forget to lament. We can't forget that when we

752
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:30,839
Speaker 1: have sympathy for someone, we're in the quicksand with them.

753
00:47:30,840 --> 00:47:33,800
Speaker 1: But we got one foot on the rock. Okay, listen,

754
00:47:34,280 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 1: support her, lament with her, lead her to the parts

755
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 1: of the Bible like this that say, my God, why

756
00:47:40,719 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 1: are you so far? Okay, it's okay to say that.

757
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:47,040
Speaker 1: It's okay to say that, But then after a few

758
00:47:47,040 --> 00:47:50,560
Speaker 1: months go by, it's a different conversation and we could

759
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:53,880
Speaker 1: have that on the next podcast. Love you guys next time.

760
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 1: Thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate

761
00:47:57,440 --> 00:47:59,439
Speaker 1: all of you guys. You could help me out by

762
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:03,360
Speaker 1: rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe

763
00:48:03,360 --> 00:48:06,080
Speaker 1: to this channel, hit that little like button and the

764
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:09,840
Speaker 1: notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload

765
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:12,320
Speaker 1: a video. If you have a question for me that

766
00:48:12,360 --> 00:48:16,399
Speaker 1: you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at

767
00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:18,920
Speaker 1: gmail dot com. Yi