1 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,720 Speaker 1: Hi, guys, it is your celebrity mentor, Jen Fessler, and 2 00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:21,439 Speaker 1: guess what I am bringing back my dear friend Jen 3 00:00:21,480 --> 00:00:25,840 Speaker 1: Pedantry and Ryan from Housewives of Orange County. Let's dive 4 00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:28,800 Speaker 1: back into our convo with them. So give me a 5 00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:32,959 Speaker 1: couple tips guys for people going through divorce or separation 6 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:33,480 Speaker 1: right now. 7 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,560 Speaker 2: You know, I'll give you a little bit of a 8 00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:38,040 Speaker 2: nugget that I don't think anyone on the show knows, 9 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:40,240 Speaker 2: and I don't think it's made its way onto the 10 00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 2: show about Jen nine jenas don't know what I'm going 11 00:00:42,720 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 2: to say here. I applaud Jen, and I'll speak through 12 00:00:46,760 --> 00:00:49,360 Speaker 2: my limits. I was not faithful in my marriage and 13 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 2: there was infidelity the minute Jen. This is really cool 14 00:00:54,040 --> 00:01:00,720 Speaker 2: and makes me emotional. The minute Jen and I went past, Hi, 15 00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,720 Speaker 2: how are you nice to meet you? 16 00:01:02,720 --> 00:01:04,920 Speaker 3: You know what Jen did? She went home and told 17 00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:08,240 Speaker 3: her husband, Yeah, yeah, there was no like. 18 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:11,440 Speaker 2: We held hands first, we kissed first, we had sex first, 19 00:01:11,440 --> 00:01:12,679 Speaker 2: and she got caught. 20 00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:14,279 Speaker 3: That's what you would think by. 21 00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 2: Watching the show Jen, where's the scarlet letter A? But 22 00:01:17,480 --> 00:01:20,000 Speaker 2: none of that is what happened. Their marriage was three 23 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,520 Speaker 2: years failed. At this point, I would say, you know, 24 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:26,039 Speaker 2: just hanging on because of situational COVID. 25 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 3: Well, I was scared and I had kids, and so 26 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:32,520 Speaker 3: when I when I knew this man, was like, I 27 00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:34,600 Speaker 3: just looked forward to a conversation that I knew I 28 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 3: shouldn't look forward to, right, I'm like, why am I 29 00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:39,000 Speaker 3: excited to run into him at the gym? Why do 30 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:41,759 Speaker 3: I love like texting with him? I am looking forward 31 00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:45,160 Speaker 3: to this. I remember I went home and I just 32 00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:47,880 Speaker 3: told Will like I told him about Ryan. He's like, 33 00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 3: who is this guy? I'm like, I don't know, Like 34 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:51,720 Speaker 3: I really don't know, but something is waking up and 35 00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 3: something is so wrong here. 36 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:56,560 Speaker 1: Well, yeah, I get that. Well, two things first, Jennifer, 37 00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:58,640 Speaker 1: I don't see any scarlet letter anywhere near you, So 38 00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:01,400 Speaker 1: let's get there's a scarlet letter on you. There's a 39 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,840 Speaker 1: scarletletter on pretty much all of us. Okay, So that's 40 00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:07,920 Speaker 1: the first thing. But the second thing is, Ryan, would 41 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,600 Speaker 1: you suggest that as a tip to tell people that 42 00:02:10,639 --> 00:02:14,399 Speaker 1: are going through Yes, we share that. 43 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:17,040 Speaker 3: I mean, I mean that realistic though. 44 00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:20,200 Speaker 2: You wouldn't have said that at forty. But where I 45 00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:24,240 Speaker 2: sit today with what my kids have had to experience, 46 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:28,240 Speaker 2: and you know, I can't blame their mom at the 47 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:32,639 Speaker 2: time for using that against me, and Will has done 48 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:36,280 Speaker 2: that again to an extent, so I could have avoided that. 49 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,040 Speaker 2: I can help protect my kids. 50 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 3: Have to say before even if you're thinking outside the box, 51 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:45,160 Speaker 3: you're saying be a bigger person. Yes, have the hard 52 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:48,560 Speaker 3: conversation because it makes the road way less Monty. 53 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, it does it Just not only that, not only 54 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 2: for the sake of the process that a divorce takes 55 00:02:55,360 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 2: from separation to divorce, but there's so much the emotional 56 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,280 Speaker 2: draggage and baggage that you get along the way. Where 57 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:06,280 Speaker 2: Jen was able to what I would say, do it 58 00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:11,120 Speaker 2: the right way, mine was probably the more instinctive just 59 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:14,320 Speaker 2: do it and face the consequences later. And looking back now, 60 00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 2: I just wish I was a more stand up guy. 61 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:19,320 Speaker 2: I knew I wasn't happy in the relationship. I knew 62 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:22,680 Speaker 2: it wasn't long term. We had tried therapy, counseling. At 63 00:03:22,720 --> 00:03:24,080 Speaker 2: the end of the day, and like I started with, 64 00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:26,519 Speaker 2: it was still on me and I wish I would 65 00:03:26,520 --> 00:03:31,720 Speaker 2: have been a better partner, a better father, a better 66 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:35,400 Speaker 2: human being, and I expected more of myself so today. 67 00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:37,360 Speaker 3: Would be different, because doing what you want to do 68 00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:40,760 Speaker 3: and apologizing later is very painful, even whenever it's ending. 69 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:43,680 Speaker 3: So you're saying your advice to men, I'm assuming or 70 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 3: I guess women too, is if you're going down the 71 00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:47,520 Speaker 3: path and you think there's something else out there to 72 00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:52,200 Speaker 3: have the hard conversation, first, let that person respectfully know 73 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 3: and go before you selfishly fulfill. 74 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,280 Speaker 2: Right, Yes, but before all of that, I'd say, turn 75 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:01,240 Speaker 2: over every stone at home. And if you feel like 76 00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:05,240 Speaker 2: there is not another option and something else is peaking 77 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 2: your interest and or just playing the field is speaking 78 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:10,080 Speaker 2: your interest, or not being married is peaking your interest, 79 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:13,720 Speaker 2: take care of that step before the other door opens, 80 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:14,800 Speaker 2: whatever that door looks like. 81 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:18,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I think that's great advice. I think that 82 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:20,640 Speaker 1: our listeners probably do know this because not all of them, 83 00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:23,120 Speaker 1: but a lot of them are have been through divorce, 84 00:04:23,520 --> 00:04:25,159 Speaker 1: and not just divorce. A lot of our listeners have 85 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:31,120 Speaker 1: been widowed but divorced. They say, is you leave, you 86 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:34,400 Speaker 1: finally get divorced when you can't do anything else where 87 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:39,200 Speaker 1: the money doesn't matter, and not that the kids don't matter, 88 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 1: but you know there is no other alternative here, Like, 89 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: you can't live like this anymore because divorce is hard, right, Yeah, 90 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:48,960 Speaker 1: you know. 91 00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:52,320 Speaker 2: I always say something, Jen, I'm what nine years divorce now, 92 00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:57,240 Speaker 2: I know my ex Heather still has emotional scarring and 93 00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:00,880 Speaker 2: emotional pain. Even though I would say our marriage was 94 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 2: like done, how would you not? That's why, if you 95 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 2: asked me, the number one reason why I do it 96 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:11,120 Speaker 2: different is that I've still left some carnage emotionally, some 97 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:14,600 Speaker 2: baggage for her that ten years later, to a level 98 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:17,159 Speaker 2: one out of ten or a level two or twenty 99 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:20,480 Speaker 2: out of ten, she still carries all because of my 100 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:25,080 Speaker 2: selfish actions or my inability to be face my own 101 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:26,960 Speaker 2: conflict and be an adult. 102 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:29,040 Speaker 3: So that's why I would change it. 103 00:05:29,080 --> 00:05:31,560 Speaker 2: There's a multitude of other reasons beneath that, but to 104 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 2: know I can look back and say, Heather and I 105 00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:35,720 Speaker 2: are nine years divorced, and I know she still has 106 00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:37,839 Speaker 2: pain for the way it ended, because of the way 107 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,920 Speaker 2: I chose to do it. That is the reason why. 108 00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 3: I change it. 109 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,279 Speaker 1: And listen, Jen, with as admirable as it is that 110 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,200 Speaker 1: you went to Will and said this is what's going 111 00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:50,200 Speaker 1: on with me, and listen, there's so many many things 112 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:53,200 Speaker 1: about you that I find admirable. I'm sure he has 113 00:05:53,279 --> 00:05:57,040 Speaker 1: some scarring. I mean, it's still early on and. 114 00:05:57,000 --> 00:06:01,840 Speaker 3: So when I went to Will and I said, I 115 00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:04,040 Speaker 3: got to tell you something, and I told him about 116 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 3: this guy named Ryan at the gin. Will did this 117 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:10,160 Speaker 3: thing where he would kind of laugh at me, and 118 00:06:10,240 --> 00:06:13,000 Speaker 3: he did it. He laughed, and I remember thinking, like, 119 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 3: that's funny to you, Like I'm actually telling you something 120 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:17,520 Speaker 3: that should be like you should be on the grip 121 00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:19,960 Speaker 3: you love me, Like what are you telling me right now? 122 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,240 Speaker 3: And then it just it was validating for me, Jen, 123 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,440 Speaker 3: because from that point on, it wasn't even about Will 124 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 3: and I he wanted to. It was all just about 125 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:28,880 Speaker 3: who he was. So you know, I tried, I kind 126 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:30,680 Speaker 3: of did the right thing, kind of didn't. I still 127 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:31,800 Speaker 3: did what I wanted to do. I will. 128 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:35,120 Speaker 1: Do you have any tips specifically, Jen, besides so anything 129 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: that you would suggest to I would just. 130 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:41,720 Speaker 3: Say, for people going through a divorce, what are my tips? 131 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 1: Just one? 132 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:46,400 Speaker 3: Just one? If you can stay friends and co parent, 133 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:48,240 Speaker 3: it's the best thing for the kids because the one 134 00:06:48,279 --> 00:06:50,760 Speaker 3: person that the people that lose out and divorce, like 135 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:54,000 Speaker 3: Will and I are better off, but are kids lost out? 136 00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:56,520 Speaker 3: So I would do anything to co parent. And I 137 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:58,320 Speaker 3: think if I could give any tips or advice for 138 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:01,120 Speaker 3: anybody going through a divorce, put yourself a side, and 139 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,800 Speaker 3: do the best you can to co parent for your kids. 140 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,479 Speaker 1: I mean, I think that is everything. I think that 141 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,080 Speaker 1: one of the reasons Jeff and I will be able 142 00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 1: were able to get back together is because for both 143 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:14,280 Speaker 1: of us with our kids. Like there's one specific time, 144 00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:15,920 Speaker 1: remember my daughter called me. I was in the car. 145 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:17,360 Speaker 1: I think I feel like I've told this on the 146 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:20,280 Speaker 1: on the pod before, but she called me and she 147 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:23,240 Speaker 1: was complaining about Jeff and daddy, you know, for whatever 148 00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:25,280 Speaker 1: it was. And I was like, honey, you called the 149 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:29,640 Speaker 1: wrong number. I have no interest in like hearing you 150 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 1: be disrespectful about your father and so sorry, and you 151 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:36,800 Speaker 1: know he was great about that as well. And I 152 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 1: would that if you have kids, to me, that is 153 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:41,440 Speaker 1: such great advice. 154 00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:44,360 Speaker 3: That great advice, And even if you don't want. 155 00:07:44,200 --> 00:07:48,640 Speaker 1: To because you know, hate your ex's guts, it comes 156 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:51,320 Speaker 1: back to you because you see your kids happier and 157 00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:52,680 Speaker 1: healthier and all of that. 158 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:53,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree with that. Jen. 159 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,720 Speaker 1: All right, so quick, some some specifics you guys that 160 00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:59,920 Speaker 1: I have to ask you know that. So you don't 161 00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: have a date yet at all? Do we have any idea? 162 00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:06,320 Speaker 3: Okay, I'm dying. We were at Bravo Klan Bravo Kan, 163 00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:08,760 Speaker 3: and everybody is like, when are you getting married? When 164 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:11,640 Speaker 3: you're getting married day two of Bravo Kan, everybody was 165 00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:13,920 Speaker 3: coming up. I'm so excited about March. I can't wait 166 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 3: for March. And I'm like, what is happening in March? 167 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:17,800 Speaker 3: He goes, I'm so sick of being asked about the date. 168 00:08:17,840 --> 00:08:25,720 Speaker 3: I'm just telling everybody it's March, okay, Ryan, so apparently Mark, yeah, no. 169 00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:28,240 Speaker 1: But in all seriousness, you guys, don't you seem casual 170 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:31,120 Speaker 1: about the actual Like you're together, there's no doubt that 171 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:32,520 Speaker 1: you have committed to each other. 172 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 3: Which a lot of getting married for the kids. True, 173 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:38,240 Speaker 3: I mean, we want to be married, but we're home. 174 00:08:38,360 --> 00:08:40,160 Speaker 3: We're in this home together with all of our children. 175 00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 3: We're doing life together. But I just want my kids 176 00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:46,360 Speaker 3: and his kids to know, like my step parents are 177 00:08:46,440 --> 00:08:48,720 Speaker 3: together and it's not just some like, hey, mom and 178 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:51,800 Speaker 3: I maybe moving in six months if something happens with 179 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,160 Speaker 3: her and Ryan. So we've been saying Jen like we 180 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:57,000 Speaker 3: need all these kids around, and we're finding like it's impossible. 181 00:08:57,040 --> 00:08:59,839 Speaker 3: I like literally cannot get a time with Dawson and 182 00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:02,280 Speaker 3: Thes and the two boys graduating college. 183 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:05,360 Speaker 2: And your job possibly in Georgia, going across the country 184 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,120 Speaker 2: for We're going to figure it. 185 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:09,240 Speaker 1: Out, and I promise, I'm sorry, excuse me, where are 186 00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:12,640 Speaker 1: you going? You have a job George Joyed Housewives of Atlanta. 187 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no, my oldest, my oldest, you said, 188 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:18,880 Speaker 1: in your job in Georgia. I'm like, what I'm missing? 189 00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:22,200 Speaker 3: Okay, no, no no. But when we know, we obviously, Jen, 190 00:09:22,240 --> 00:09:23,920 Speaker 3: we will, you will know for sure. 191 00:09:25,960 --> 00:09:37,800 Speaker 1: Yeah. M a couple more specifics and you can choose 192 00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:40,360 Speaker 1: to answer or not. But I have to ask questions. 193 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:41,719 Speaker 1: Do you guys believe in prenups? 194 00:09:42,559 --> 00:09:46,280 Speaker 3: Yeah? We do, we do. I won't ever be in 195 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,600 Speaker 3: the position I've been left in, and I'm just grateful 196 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:50,360 Speaker 3: that Ryan sees that for what it is. 197 00:09:50,480 --> 00:09:50,839 Speaker 2: And so. 198 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:55,600 Speaker 3: We we actually talked about it very openly, very often. 199 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:58,080 Speaker 3: I mean not very often, but when we're when we're like, 200 00:09:58,120 --> 00:09:59,679 Speaker 3: we if we're going to get married, we need to 201 00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:01,959 Speaker 3: get these things in place, and we talk about it. 202 00:10:02,600 --> 00:10:04,840 Speaker 1: Listen, I was we didn't have a prenup. I was, 203 00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:08,480 Speaker 1: you know, I was young, but I would only tell 204 00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:13,040 Speaker 1: you know, people our age, especially on part two, get 205 00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:14,760 Speaker 1: that in writing it not because you're not going to 206 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:17,040 Speaker 1: be together forever. It's just I feel like it's. 207 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:17,800 Speaker 3: Just what he says. 208 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:18,920 Speaker 1: Yeah. 209 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 3: Sometimes I'm the female and I'm like, but what are 210 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 3: you saying? He' said, Oh my god, stop, I'm not 211 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:25,000 Speaker 3: saying that. But we are going to be smart about this. 212 00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:27,640 Speaker 3: I think women is different to somebody. 213 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:30,520 Speaker 2: I think we look at things as for me, this 214 00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:35,360 Speaker 2: is a dotting the ice crossing the t's. There's zero 215 00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:37,960 Speaker 2: emotion involved in it. For me, it's just a simple 216 00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:43,160 Speaker 2: function of finance finances, and those usually don't bring emotional side. 217 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:45,440 Speaker 2: I think for you, that's where we differ. Right, it 218 00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:49,360 Speaker 2: brings when Jen here's prena specific get that. It makes 219 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:52,079 Speaker 2: her say, are you is there a plan to the end, 220 00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:54,360 Speaker 2: because then why would we be talking about this? And 221 00:10:54,400 --> 00:10:57,160 Speaker 2: I say that now you've added an element that we're 222 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:00,120 Speaker 2: just simply talking about a legal document, that's it. And 223 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,880 Speaker 2: then I give her this example. 224 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:04,720 Speaker 3: I'm forty nine and I've had life. 225 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:08,120 Speaker 2: Insurance for years, and I tell her what you should 226 00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:10,319 Speaker 2: be saying to me, do you plan on dying? I'd say, well, no, 227 00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:12,880 Speaker 2: not for thirty plus years, but I still have to 228 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:15,520 Speaker 2: do the financial piece of the puzzle, right, So It's 229 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:17,079 Speaker 2: like same thing with a prenup. Why are you doing 230 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:18,680 Speaker 2: your prenup if you're not planning to get divorced? Well, 231 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,960 Speaker 2: the same reason I get life insurance. I'm not planning 232 00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,720 Speaker 2: on dying tomorrow, you know, but I still have to 233 00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:24,760 Speaker 2: do the financial piece. 234 00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:27,480 Speaker 1: And I think you can structure a prenup so that 235 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:30,760 Speaker 1: Jen you don't feel insecure about it. So, I mean, 236 00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:35,280 Speaker 1: because you've spoke, You've spoken very openly about finances, you know, 237 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:37,680 Speaker 1: on the show, and I know that you are you 238 00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:40,600 Speaker 1: have struggled, and I'm not telling you both what to do, 239 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:43,000 Speaker 1: but I think that prenups can be formatted so that, 240 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 1: you know, everyone feels more comfortable. Right. So that's that's 241 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,360 Speaker 1: just my two cents. But I get how you would 242 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:53,079 Speaker 1: feel that way. I just would tell all of my friends, 243 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:57,040 Speaker 1: no matter what the differences were in terms of finances 244 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:58,760 Speaker 1: to people going in, we're too old. 245 00:11:59,360 --> 00:11:59,760 Speaker 3: Yeah. 246 00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:01,320 Speaker 1: Opinion to deal with. 247 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 3: That answer is yes, we believe in Yeah. 248 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 1: All right, So now, just some cheesy questions that I 249 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:10,240 Speaker 1: can't help myself. Also asking, so if the wedding is March, 250 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:11,880 Speaker 1: who from the cast is invited? 251 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:13,880 Speaker 3: Well, obviously if we did it on the show, I 252 00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 3: think i'd have to have everybody. I mean, the only 253 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 3: person I ever sit in a weird spot with, unfortunately, 254 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:23,000 Speaker 3: is Tamra. It's I haven't talked to Katie so long 255 00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:26,640 Speaker 3: that I don't know how. Actually Katie reached out to 256 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:30,199 Speaker 3: me after Bravo con to you, she did. She texted 257 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:32,439 Speaker 3: me after Bravo Kan and just said, you know what, 258 00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:35,520 Speaker 3: I thought we would connect at Bravo Khan and I 259 00:12:35,559 --> 00:12:39,040 Speaker 3: would like to get together and talk. And I can 260 00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:42,040 Speaker 3: see at some point Katie and I possibly needing a conversation. 261 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:46,959 Speaker 3: I've known Tama so long that I neither at this 262 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,600 Speaker 3: spot Jen where I'm really ready to have that conversation 263 00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 3: where both of us are going to show up and 264 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:55,960 Speaker 3: be very brutally honest about what the hell has happened 265 00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:00,199 Speaker 3: within this friendship or just loving her from afar and 266 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,760 Speaker 3: that being fun. So who would come to the wedding 267 00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,559 Speaker 3: if it was just Ryan and I on our own 268 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,760 Speaker 3: Right now, I'd say everybody but Tamra and Katie. And 269 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,880 Speaker 3: that's not a isolate them, that's just because I don't 270 00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:13,720 Speaker 3: have a relationship with them, right. 271 00:13:13,679 --> 00:13:17,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, now I get it. Listen, You're gonna 272 00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,000 Speaker 1: I am I am thinking that you're going to have 273 00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,319 Speaker 1: to resolve things because you're going to be working together 274 00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:26,960 Speaker 1: again soon. But don't comment on that, not not looking 275 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:31,280 Speaker 1: for anything about that, about those specifics. That is my guess. 276 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:34,400 Speaker 1: So funny and this is off subject, but being at 277 00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:37,439 Speaker 1: Bravacon now and getting to know, you know, women from 278 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:41,160 Speaker 1: other franchises and just liking them, like, you know, I 279 00:13:41,200 --> 00:13:43,440 Speaker 1: got to know Katie a little bit. Tam and I 280 00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,480 Speaker 1: have been friends for so long, and it's so it's 281 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 1: it's not that sticky because I feel like people are 282 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:49,679 Speaker 1: we're grown ups and we understand that and loving you 283 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:53,320 Speaker 1: so much and you know, but it's it's weird because 284 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:56,800 Speaker 1: you see what goes down on the show and you 285 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,000 Speaker 1: love your friends and you hate to see it, but 286 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:02,400 Speaker 1: you do sort of develop these other relationships they go, 287 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:04,360 Speaker 1: you know, in and out and but whatever. 288 00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:08,199 Speaker 3: That's what I love about women like you, Jen, because 289 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:11,360 Speaker 3: I don't. I could walk into a room and see you, 290 00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,720 Speaker 3: Katie and Tamar all at a table together and I'm 291 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,520 Speaker 3: not like, oh gosh, is Jen going to change the 292 00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:19,480 Speaker 3: way she feels about me? Because I know You're not 293 00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:21,880 Speaker 3: that kind of ever, and you know what, I would 294 00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,440 Speaker 3: still sit here today and say, I'm so happy that 295 00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:27,160 Speaker 3: you have a friendship with Tamar and Katie because guess what, 296 00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:29,720 Speaker 3: I saw the best of Katie for almost two years. 297 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 3: I loved that. 298 00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:30,960 Speaker 1: I know you did. 299 00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:34,160 Speaker 3: Heartedly, and I would tell you before I was ever 300 00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:36,520 Speaker 3: on this show, I thought Tamar and Eddie were like 301 00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,880 Speaker 3: one of the best couples I ever knew. And so 302 00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:43,000 Speaker 3: you're seeing a side of these women that I saw, 303 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,200 Speaker 3: and how could you not be drawn to them? 304 00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:47,840 Speaker 1: So I also I also see the show and I see, 305 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:51,360 Speaker 1: you know, everybody and what goes down, and women can 306 00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:55,720 Speaker 1: be mean, and I see the awful things that happen. 307 00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:57,960 Speaker 1: And that's not just I'm not just talking about Tamaron Katie. 308 00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,760 Speaker 1: I'm talking about all the franchises, all the women. So 309 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,360 Speaker 1: you know, you're watching that and you see a friend 310 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,720 Speaker 1: of yours get hurt and you're not, you know, immune 311 00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:08,920 Speaker 1: to that. But yeah, I'm not on the show. So 312 00:15:09,040 --> 00:15:11,600 Speaker 1: I do see the really good, sweet, warm sides when 313 00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:13,520 Speaker 1: I'm with these people now. And again, I'm not just 314 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,400 Speaker 1: talking about Tammer and Katie anyway, That's not what this 315 00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:19,600 Speaker 1: is about. This is about, uh part two, your part two. 316 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 1: I really am happy for you, guys. I really hope 317 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:26,480 Speaker 1: that you get to show more of this and it's 318 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:30,000 Speaker 1: so it's so impressive and heartwarming, and I mean that truly. 319 00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:33,440 Speaker 1: You know, I don't feel like everybody, you know, it's 320 00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 1: everything is salacious on the show. And that's why I 321 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:39,280 Speaker 1: was a viewer of you know, since the beginning, because 322 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:42,040 Speaker 1: I love this. Can't help it, just do right. It's 323 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:46,560 Speaker 1: like I I watched every Every Housewives episode on every franchise, 324 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:50,560 Speaker 1: you know, forever. But I just think that this is 325 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:56,280 Speaker 1: so it just hasn't been shown, showcased, and it's special. 326 00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,520 Speaker 1: That's that's the way I feel about it. 327 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's interesting from my side. You know, Jeff Pessler 328 00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:03,000 Speaker 3: knows this. 329 00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:06,280 Speaker 2: Yes, the men and Jeff's different, right because your guys 330 00:16:06,280 --> 00:16:10,000 Speaker 2: show the men are more involved and engaged. For us, 331 00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:12,920 Speaker 2: we're like an ancillary piece in the back and should 332 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:14,760 Speaker 2: stay that way. I learned my lesson we should see 333 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:15,120 Speaker 2: in the back. 334 00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:17,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, I would. 335 00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:20,960 Speaker 2: Say it's a bummer because we'll still get comments of, oh, 336 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:24,480 Speaker 2: he's gonna this, Jen, Jen, be careful, Jen, watch out 337 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:28,680 Speaker 2: for Ryan. It's like we've been together five years, seven kids, 338 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:31,400 Speaker 2: we all live under one roof, going on year three. 339 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:39,400 Speaker 2: We're the sole financial emotional support system for Jen's five kids. Yeah, 340 00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:41,920 Speaker 2: so it's you know, it's it's some It's funny because 341 00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:45,000 Speaker 2: the commentary comes in like we're a brand new relationship 342 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,880 Speaker 2: and Jen be be careful, there's red flags. 343 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,960 Speaker 3: Yet we're you know, nearing year six. 344 00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:51,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, all of us integrated. 345 00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:53,520 Speaker 3: We look at each other saying like I should. So 346 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,520 Speaker 3: it's a bummer selfishly. 347 00:16:55,240 --> 00:16:57,720 Speaker 1: That I should get more love. Though now I feel 348 00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:58,320 Speaker 1: like I. 349 00:16:58,200 --> 00:16:58,680 Speaker 3: Feel like. 350 00:17:00,200 --> 00:17:01,880 Speaker 2: The bummer that I think if they were to show 351 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,040 Speaker 2: our real relationship. 352 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:05,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. 353 00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:07,199 Speaker 2: I think there's a lot more to offer on that 354 00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:09,359 Speaker 2: side than the you know, I think it's that they. 355 00:17:09,240 --> 00:17:11,280 Speaker 3: Don't show our real relationship. I think it's more fun 356 00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:13,720 Speaker 3: to show Ryan like trying to get me in a 357 00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:17,080 Speaker 3: bikini and slapping my ass whatever. You know, they don't 358 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:19,280 Speaker 3: know that we're actually just very boring and on the couch. 359 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:24,200 Speaker 1: Watching right right right right. I love you guys, Thank 360 00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,240 Speaker 1: you for doing this. I really appreciate it. 361 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:26,680 Speaker 3: Yeah. 362 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:28,679 Speaker 1: I hope we get a lot of listeners. I really do. 363 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,679 Speaker 1: I mean we do, we do pretty well, but this 364 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:33,200 Speaker 1: one is this is a good one. So I've had 365 00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:34,719 Speaker 1: like a few questions. 366 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:39,520 Speaker 3: Yeh, next time, all right, remember what you wish, carefully 367 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:41,360 Speaker 3: you wish. 368 00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:43,280 Speaker 1: Okay, listen, you had this was not I don't think 369 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:44,720 Speaker 1: this was like a walk in the park. I don't 370 00:17:44,720 --> 00:17:48,040 Speaker 1: think it was. You guys were very honest. So I 371 00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:49,560 Speaker 1: don't know how much harder it could be, but I'll 372 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:50,080 Speaker 1: work on it. 373 00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:56,400 Speaker 3: No, just yeah, we're grate YEA love you okaye, thank. 374 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,480 Speaker 1: You, bye you guys, So thank you guys for being 375 00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:01,560 Speaker 1: so open. Chapter two is not always perfect, but you 376 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:03,960 Speaker 1: guys are a great example that you can find love 377 00:18:04,119 --> 00:18:07,360 Speaker 1: after a difficult situation. Are you ready to find love 378 00:18:07,359 --> 00:18:09,919 Speaker 1: in your chapter two? Call us or email us. All 379 00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:11,880 Speaker 1: of the info is in the show notes. We are 380 00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,679 Speaker 1: here to help follow us on socials. Make sure to 381 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:17,520 Speaker 1: rate and review the podcast I Do Part two, an 382 00:18:17,520 --> 00:18:20,480 Speaker 1: iHeart podcast where falling in love is the main objective.