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Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys

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Speaker 1: online at Advocateslaw dot com.

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Speaker 2: Ryan is on the phone today for our first Date

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Speaker 2: follow up. He's getting ghosted by a woman named Lena,

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Speaker 2: and in a few minutes we're gonna call her seems

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Speaker 2: to tell us why she's ghosting him and maybe get

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Speaker 2: him another date. But first, Ryan, how long has it

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Speaker 2: been since you heard from her?

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Speaker 3: You know, it's been like a couple of weeks.

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Speaker 4: That's definitely a ghosting.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, So how many times have you reached out to

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Speaker 5: her in that time?

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Speaker 3: You know, just a few times.

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Speaker 6: I don't like to like text too much, you know

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Speaker 6: what I mean? Like you like, I think three times

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Speaker 6: I text her and I'm like, yeah, that's not not

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Speaker 6: doing any more than that.

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Speaker 5: So what do you Let's go back to the date then, like,

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Speaker 5: how did you guys meet? What happened on the date?

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Speaker 3: So we met on hinge.

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Speaker 6: And then I felt like a really good connection. We

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Speaker 6: both love concerts and like new adventures and trying new things,

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Speaker 6: traveling stuff like that, and like she's very witty and

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Speaker 6: she's very interesting, she's beautiful.

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Speaker 3: So we went to a burger spot on the water. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you know, it was a lot of fun.

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Speaker 6: Like it was nice, like kind of outside kind of area.

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Speaker 6: We were having some drinks, you know, just talking, and

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Speaker 6: afterwards we went and walked around and like kind of

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Speaker 6: took in the scenery and we you know, we had

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Speaker 6: a really great kiss. And it was just like, I

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Speaker 6: don't understand why she ghoest to me because it felt

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Speaker 6: so romantic and like idealized, you know.

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Speaker 3: I mean, maybe some people would think it's cheesy. I

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Speaker 3: don't know, but that's what I was looking for.

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Speaker 5: But it sounds romantic actually, So after all this time,

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Speaker 5: you know, she's ghosting you two weeks later, the date

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Speaker 5: sounds great, But what is it about her that makes

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Speaker 5: you want to see her now?

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Speaker 3: You know? I just felt like I had a real connection.

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Speaker 6: We were like kind of similar goals. We both want

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Speaker 6: to travel. I just felt like we went well together.

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Speaker 5: Did something happen on the date at all that may

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Speaker 5: have made it go in a different direction?

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Speaker 6: Well, I will say, you know something kind of not

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Speaker 6: popular now is I have made a decision recently to

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Speaker 6: have stained from sex until marriage.

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Speaker 4: Okay, And you told her.

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Speaker 3: This, Yeah, yeah, I did, And this is.

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Speaker 2: New you have Okay, Okay, right, and you think maybe

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Speaker 2: she had a problem with that because she's like, I

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Speaker 2: need you right now.

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Speaker 4: Ryan.

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Speaker 6: It's you know, it's possible because like I don't think

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Speaker 6: that's the thing that's common now, Like, you know, some

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Speaker 6: people do it, but it's like, especially you know here,

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Speaker 6: like I don't feel like that's one of those things

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Speaker 6: that people do anymore. But the reason why I kind

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Speaker 6: of went that direction is, you know, I slept around

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Speaker 6: and it felt empty, and it felt like I was

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Speaker 6: just kind of using girls for their body and I

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Speaker 6: wasn't connecting right, you know, And it's one of those

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Speaker 6: things after a while, you're like, gosh, like what do

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Speaker 6: I really want? So, you know, I asked myself when

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Speaker 6: I was like, I want somebody that I could build

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Speaker 6: a future with, and I feel like Lana's has that potential.

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Speaker 4: Okay, I can respect that.

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Speaker 2: After my last breakup, I decided that I wasn't going

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Speaker 2: to give myself to anybody unless I thought that their

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Speaker 2: energy was good, you know, or that like I wasn't

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Speaker 2: necessarily a marriage thing, but it was kind of the

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Speaker 2: same thing, but it was more about I don't want

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Speaker 2: to like mix my energy with bad energy, you know,

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Speaker 2: because I feel like it does. I feel like you

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Speaker 2: know you do do it does somehow become a part

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Speaker 2: of you.

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Speaker 4: Well, you exchanged more.

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Speaker 5: Than just what you can see. That energy is also

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Speaker 5: exchanged between the two of you. So fair, fair, for

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Speaker 5: fair points for both of you. Look at you, guys, Thank.

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Speaker 4: You, because that's for sure maturing right. Everybody connection too.

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Speaker 4: So why do you think she's gusting you?

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Speaker 2: Then?

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Speaker 6: I think, you know, I just don't know if she

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Speaker 6: was comfortable with that. I mean, that's my thought, but like,

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Speaker 6: I don't know for sure because everything else went pretty well.

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Speaker 3: But when I said that, she she didn't have a

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Speaker 3: bad reaction, but it was just kind of like she

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Speaker 3: kind stuff a little bit, you know, and then it

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Speaker 3: kind of like pat that moment passed.

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Speaker 6: So I was like, oh, I.

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Speaker 3: Guess it's fine.

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Speaker 4: We'll see if we can figure it out for you.

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Speaker 2: Then we'll play as song come back and then call

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Speaker 2: her and see if she'll tell us why she's ghosting

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Speaker 2: you and maybe get you another date. Okay, Okay, sounds great,

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Speaker 2: All right, man, pleas on come back, Get your first

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Speaker 2: DA follow up, Next.

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Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys

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Speaker 1: Online at advocateslad dot com.

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Speaker 2: Right in the middle of the first day follow up

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Speaker 2: and if you're just joining us, Ryan is on the phone.

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Speaker 2: He's getting ghosted by Lana And in a minute we're

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Speaker 2: gonna call her see if she tells us why she's

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Speaker 2: ghosting him and maybe get him another date. But first, Ryan,

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Speaker 2: why don't you recap to everybody your situation?

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Speaker 3: So I met Lana on hinge. We connected really quickly.

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Speaker 6: I felt like a good connection with her loss of

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Speaker 6: similar andrist. We went to a burger spot on the water,

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Speaker 6: had a bunch of cocktails and had a lot of fun,

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Speaker 6: and we went for a walk. We kissed. Everything seemed perfect,

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Speaker 6: But I feel like, maybe because I want to stain

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Speaker 6: from sex until marriage because of my past, that she

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Speaker 6: might be ghosting me.

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Speaker 4: Okay, are you ready for us to call her?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, here we go. Hello, Hi, man, I speak to Lana. Please.

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Speaker 7: This is Lana.

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Speaker 2: Hi Lana, how are you? My name is Jewbell, and

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Speaker 2: I host a radio show. It's called The Jewbell Show.

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Speaker 5: Hi, Lana, the whole show's here. I'm Nina.

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Speaker 4: Hi, I'm Victoria. How are you?

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Speaker 7: Hi'd thank you?

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Speaker 2: Have you ever heard the show before? I have not Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'll let you know something. We do a segment on

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Speaker 2: our show. It's called the first Date follow Up. What

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Speaker 2: that is is if you go out on a date

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Speaker 2: with somebody and then you ghost them, that person can

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Speaker 2: email us to get you on the phone and ask

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Speaker 2: why you're ghosting them. So we got an email about you.

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Speaker 8: Oh and this is from Ryan.

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Speaker 4: Oh yes it is Wow. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes people say another name, so we know they're ghosting

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Speaker 2: multiple people. But you're obviously just ghosting Ryan right now.

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Speaker 7: Uh.

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Speaker 8: I would say that I have not exactly been ghosting Ryan.

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Speaker 7: That wasn't my intention. I was taking time to process

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Speaker 7: what he told me. At the end of our date.

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Speaker 8: Ryan said that he is waiting until marriage, and that

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Speaker 8: is not something that I've ever done in a relationship.

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Speaker 7: I have always had.

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Speaker 8: Intimacy with all of my partners and it's a really

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Speaker 8: big part of a relationship for me. So it was

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Speaker 8: not my intention to completely ghost Ryan. I really was

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Speaker 8: trying to take time to think about if this could

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Speaker 8: be something that would work for me. I had such

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Speaker 8: a good time. Yes, it was so magical, and he's

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Speaker 8: such a spiritual guy and we really connected. I felt

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Speaker 8: like he was really seeing me but I'm afraid that

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Speaker 8: if we get into this relationship without you know, the

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Speaker 8: intimacy that I'm usual will one this sounds bad, but

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Speaker 8: what if we're not good together.

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Speaker 7: Physically and we find out too late?

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Speaker 5: That's fair?

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Speaker 7: And another thing that I have been thinking.

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Speaker 8: About is what if it becomes something that gives me,

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Speaker 8: you know, reason to stray, our thoughts to stray because

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Speaker 8: I am a sexual person.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, so you're processing a lot of different things.

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Speaker 7: Yes, absolutely, I.

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Speaker 4: Can understand that.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, it's not something that you hear all

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Speaker 5: the time, and especially if that's a way that you

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Speaker 5: connect and share yourself with another person. And then that's

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Speaker 5: a lot of pressure too, right because you're like, wait

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Speaker 5: a second, so we're doing this, I'm gonna get excited

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Speaker 5: and want to unwrap the present, but I.

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Speaker 4: Can't marry you.

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Speaker 2: So what if we could convince Ryan to sleep with

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Speaker 2: you before you're married? Would you swallow with them again.

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Speaker 4: This commitment? But would you?

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Speaker 9: I would love to sleep with Ryan, but if this

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Speaker 9: is a boundary that he is setting I and I

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Speaker 9: were to get into a relationship with him.

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Speaker 8: I would I would want to respect that. I would

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Speaker 8: not once I am in the relationship. I would not

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Speaker 8: I would have given up any plans to sleep with Ryan.

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Speaker 4: What if we could convince him to go back on

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Speaker 4: his morals?

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Speaker 5: Though, do ball she's respecting his boundaries, Maybe should respect

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Speaker 5: his boundaries.

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Speaker 2: I'll respect his boundaries for now, Lona. Ryan is actually

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Speaker 2: on the phone listening and wants to talk to you.

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Speaker 7: Oh hi Ryan.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I know it's probably like the most awkward way

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Speaker 6: we could meet again. But I want to say, first

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Speaker 6: of all, I respect that, like you respect my boundaries.

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Speaker 6: It was nice to hear that without you knowing I

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Speaker 6: was there, because like that, that proves to me that

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Speaker 6: if we can make it work, that this could work.

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Speaker 6: But I just want to say, like, for me, I

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Speaker 6: don't see intimacy as just there's physical, emotional, mental intimacy

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Speaker 6: that can we built. Like you know, we can have

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Speaker 6: days where we just cuddle. Is colass like all that's

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Speaker 6: on the table still, I'm just not trying to take

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Speaker 6: it all the way.

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Speaker 5: So like, where do you draw the line?

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Speaker 3: Well, I think that's something that we have to discuss, right.

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Speaker 4: Got it.

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Speaker 8: I respect that, and that does make me excited to

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Speaker 8: hear that you have interest in being intimate with me.

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Speaker 8: I am. My biggest concern is still I just am

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Speaker 8: really concerned of straying. And that's not your fault, not

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Speaker 8: your fault at all, and that's something that I need

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Speaker 8: to decide and you know, make a plan with my

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Speaker 8: morals that I will not you know, if we were

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Speaker 8: to be in a relationship together, that I will not

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Speaker 8: feel that I'm not getting what I need and then

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Speaker 8: look for what I need elsewhere.

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Speaker 3: I think I can find ways to take care of

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Speaker 3: what you need, at least.

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Speaker 4: In the shorter Ryan.

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Speaker 2: Not that I'm trying to get you to rethink the

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Speaker 2: promise that you made to yourself, but I'm trying to

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Speaker 2: get you to rethink it. When I decided to do

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Speaker 2: this similar thing, I didn't make it about marriage because

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Speaker 2: you know, like you should really get to know somebody

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Speaker 2: for it, and it can be a long time before marriage,

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Speaker 2: so that's a long time not doing it. But me

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Speaker 2: and my therapist came up with I will not give

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Speaker 2: myself to anybody until I know I have a secure

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Speaker 2: connection with them.

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Speaker 3: Well, I think that's fair. I think that's a healthy

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Speaker 3: way of thinking of it too.

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Speaker 2: So because does it have to be like a ring

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Speaker 2: and a ceremony and all that for Ryan to get

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Speaker 2: it out.

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Speaker 6: Okay, I don't think it has to, but there definitely

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Speaker 6: has to be that line where it's like, I know

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Speaker 6: I'm building a future with you.

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Speaker 3: At the very least.

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Speaker 5: I think there's a lot of talk that we're getting

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Speaker 5: ahead of ourselves here a little bit. You guys like

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Speaker 5: each other, and I think there's definitely stuff that you

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Speaker 5: guys can explore to even see if you're gonna make

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Speaker 5: it all that way. People just tell me not to

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Speaker 5: get ahead of myself, and I feel like we're getting

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Speaker 5: ahead of ourselves here too, So I don't know that

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Speaker 5: there's a possibility of you getting your needs met in

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Speaker 5: a certain way. Lana, and Ryan, you know you're open

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Speaker 5: to exploring that stuff too. I don't see any problems.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that will work.

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Speaker 8: I do think that it may be cheesy, but I

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Speaker 8: think that it is.

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Speaker 7: Very sweet that you.

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Speaker 8: Brought me on the radio to call me for a

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Speaker 8: second date. I think that is very romantic, and I'm

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Speaker 8: I'm willing to try it.

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Speaker 7: I think that we have such a good connection.

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Speaker 4: So Lana, you'll go out with Ryan again. We'll pay

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Speaker 4: for it, I will.

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Speaker 7: I would love to see you again.

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Speaker 3: Ryan, so awesome. That's great.

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Speaker 6: I'm glad to hear that.

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Speaker 3: That's like, it's I'm so excited, you know.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you guys are cute. I'm so excited too, me too.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Congratulations, Ryan, you did it.

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Speaker 5: You got another date's first

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Speaker 1: Date follow up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorney Online

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Speaker 1: at Advocateslaw dot com