1 00:00:01,880 --> 00:00:05,359 Speaker 1: Wine Down with Janet Kramer, and I heard radio podcast 2 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:13,280 Speaker 1: Ladies that Zoomed Together Quarantined Together. It's Ladies One Day 3 00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:17,720 Speaker 1: with Sarah Gretzky and of course we've got producer Torreon. 4 00:00:18,239 --> 00:00:23,040 Speaker 1: Oh hey, oh hey, um wait, Sarah, you were back 5 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:26,840 Speaker 1: in l A. Right, Yes, we are back because you 6 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:29,520 Speaker 1: were in the cabin for a while. We're We went 7 00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:33,280 Speaker 1: onto the mountains for like a month and then things 8 00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:35,360 Speaker 1: got a little We were like, we need to get home. 9 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 1: You know, we just needed to come home. Do you 10 00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:41,919 Speaker 1: did you miss like? Because it's like I can't imagine 11 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:44,159 Speaker 1: not being quarantined in my house. That's why I have 12 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:49,000 Speaker 1: so much empathy for people who are not home. Well, 13 00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:51,800 Speaker 1: I'm just really happy to be home because it's nice 14 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:54,360 Speaker 1: to you know, be in the l A weather. And 15 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 1: even though we can't be outside, there's just something about 16 00:00:56,360 --> 00:00:58,920 Speaker 1: like the sunshine and like opening my blinds and seeing 17 00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,880 Speaker 1: sun that like just makes me makes my soul feel better. 18 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:06,520 Speaker 1: So we're back in our cozy apartment. But how is 19 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:15,040 Speaker 1: being back in such a confined space? Um? I mean, yeah, 20 00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:18,880 Speaker 1: it's just it's tough. I mean, it's just funny because 21 00:01:19,319 --> 00:01:21,120 Speaker 1: I talked to like my sister or my parents and 22 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:23,360 Speaker 1: they're like, oh, this is you know, this is tough, 23 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:27,160 Speaker 1: And I'm like, you're you have a backyard? Like I 24 00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:29,200 Speaker 1: would kill for a backyard, you know what I mean. 25 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:33,680 Speaker 1: Like it's just I being in an apartment. I don't 26 00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:35,679 Speaker 1: know how everyone in New York. I mean, I can't 27 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 1: even imagine. You know those you're all stepped on top 28 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:42,680 Speaker 1: of each other in apartments. It's tough. So are you 29 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:44,720 Speaker 1: Are you going out for walks as much as you can? 30 00:01:44,720 --> 00:01:47,800 Speaker 1: Because that's yeah, that's something definitely where I I'm grateful 31 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,280 Speaker 1: for the nice weather that's been happening in Nashville, so 32 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:53,480 Speaker 1: like we've been able to go outside and obviously, you know, 33 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:57,280 Speaker 1: the house we're in l A was aure foot house. 34 00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: I mean, we're so blessed to be able to be 35 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 1: in the house or Nashville and be able to go outside. 36 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:03,720 Speaker 1: And it's supposed to be like eighty degrees this weekend, 37 00:02:03,760 --> 00:02:05,280 Speaker 1: so I'm like, all right, we might go slimming. So 38 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:08,840 Speaker 1: it's like I feel like I can't really complain because 39 00:02:08,919 --> 00:02:12,079 Speaker 1: it's so nice out and I'm gonna have fomo of 40 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:14,360 Speaker 1: you guys in your pool. No, But it's crazy because 41 00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:16,240 Speaker 1: when we came home, we were like, okay, I mean 42 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:18,280 Speaker 1: we have dogs, so we're used to going on walks 43 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 1: three times a day. Everyone in l A is on 44 00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:24,919 Speaker 1: a walk now and so it's almost like you can't. 45 00:02:24,919 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 1: I mean we're on the sidewalk and we're dodging people 46 00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:28,959 Speaker 1: and I'm so now we've kind of made our times. 47 00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:31,000 Speaker 1: We either go like really early or really late at 48 00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 1: night because I'm like, this is the new grocery store, 49 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:36,359 Speaker 1: Like everyone's out. Everyone now has a dog and are 50 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 1: people wearing masks? Everyone? Yeah, everyone's wearing masks. Um, So 51 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,040 Speaker 1: we wear them when we walk our dogs. And it's 52 00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:46,799 Speaker 1: just it's it's crazy that it's the reality. But at 53 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:49,000 Speaker 1: the at the beginning, it kind of like scared me. 54 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:50,919 Speaker 1: I don't know, it's kind of scary like seeing people 55 00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 1: in that because I'm like, I just want to see her. 56 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 1: I'm missing your face. I don't even know who you are, 57 00:02:55,400 --> 00:02:58,560 Speaker 1: but I just want to see your face. But Tori, 58 00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 1: where are you at right now? I am in like 59 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:08,639 Speaker 1: Arrowhead cabin um. So there's a lot of social distancing 60 00:03:08,680 --> 00:03:13,760 Speaker 1: because no one really is there's lots of land in between. Sure, 61 00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:17,359 Speaker 1: do you enjoy it? Though? Uh? It's a lot better 62 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 1: than being at my apartment because like the other day 63 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:24,240 Speaker 1: when I was there grabbing mail, Um, I forgot my 64 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:26,239 Speaker 1: mask when I was walking around, and I became the 65 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:31,519 Speaker 1: most hated person I I had never felt more judged before, 66 00:03:31,919 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: I had never felt more just guilty because it's everyone 67 00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:39,320 Speaker 1: so close to each other. So it's nice feeling less 68 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:41,840 Speaker 1: anxious that I'm like ruining people's lives if I forget 69 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:45,800 Speaker 1: a mask or something. You know, how is it being 70 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,160 Speaker 1: like at the parents though? Are they on your nerves 71 00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 1: a little bit? But we're all I think we're all 72 00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,680 Speaker 1: feeling that, so we're all kind of finding our corners 73 00:03:52,760 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 1: and spaces. Um, My whole family actually has been quarantining 74 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:59,400 Speaker 1: for the past like month now together. So it's my nieces, 75 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:03,840 Speaker 1: my nephew, my sister in law, my brother in law, 76 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:06,360 Speaker 1: like everyone is in this cabin. So it's been a 77 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 1: little packed. But weirdly, we've been so isolated from people 78 00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:14,520 Speaker 1: that we're enjoying almost having even if it's confrontational moments, 79 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:18,039 Speaker 1: you're almost kind of enjoying that. Sure, I know, I 80 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:22,280 Speaker 1: kind of miss like we're we're are being now up 81 00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:24,560 Speaker 1: to the fourth so that way we don't get on 82 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 1: an airplane so we can actually see my grandparents because 83 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,080 Speaker 1: I'm like, I missed my family, Like I don't want 84 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:30,120 Speaker 1: to have to if we fly, then we'll have to. 85 00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:31,960 Speaker 1: You know, who knows what's gonna happen in July. But 86 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,880 Speaker 1: I'm just we're trying to be proactive because I'm like, 87 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:36,039 Speaker 1: I want to see my grandparents, Like I just I 88 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:40,320 Speaker 1: miss my family. I literally I was like I would 89 00:04:40,360 --> 00:04:42,680 Speaker 1: do anything to be annoyed by my sister's right now, 90 00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:45,799 Speaker 1: like I miss Like I wish my mom was yelling 91 00:04:45,839 --> 00:04:47,719 Speaker 1: at me. I wish my dad was asking me to 92 00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:50,280 Speaker 1: go on and run, like I just miss my parents. 93 00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:53,520 Speaker 1: This is just crazy because it's like this has been 94 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,360 Speaker 1: like your first few months of marriage have has been this. 95 00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:01,480 Speaker 1: It's just I has to be interesting. But again, I 96 00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:03,839 Speaker 1: kind of feel like that's a blessing maybe in a 97 00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:06,080 Speaker 1: way because you're still in that honeymoon face or no 98 00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:10,159 Speaker 1: or like Wayne was like, wow, like how cool that 99 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:13,200 Speaker 1: you guys are getting to spend you know, your first 100 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:15,680 Speaker 1: like two months seven with each other, Like I would 101 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:20,240 Speaker 1: love that, And then other people are like, wow, you 102 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:22,280 Speaker 1: guys have not left each other's side since you said 103 00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:25,160 Speaker 1: I do. Are you going crazy? And I think if 104 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,080 Speaker 1: we wouldn't have been together for so long, it would 105 00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 1: have been crazy. But like we've lived together for two years, 106 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:33,039 Speaker 1: we've done the thing, you know, we know, but today 107 00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:36,839 Speaker 1: I cracked today, I know, tell me more what happened. No, 108 00:05:37,279 --> 00:05:41,640 Speaker 1: not cracked, But we're both very like like I'll go 109 00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:43,839 Speaker 1: into my room, He'll be on the couch like we're 110 00:05:43,920 --> 00:05:46,960 Speaker 1: very like chill and calm. And I just woke up 111 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:49,520 Speaker 1: this morning and I just felt suffocated. I just felt 112 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:51,480 Speaker 1: I was like, I need to make the bed, get 113 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,039 Speaker 1: out of the bed. What are you still doing here? Like, 114 00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:56,040 Speaker 1: go somewhere? He said, where am I going to go? 115 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:59,360 Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't know, just let me clean the house, 116 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:03,760 Speaker 1: like and I kind of snapped. But um, it's always 117 00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,599 Speaker 1: like premonstrel you know. I I found now in those 118 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,400 Speaker 1: three months that it's always just a couple of days 119 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: where it's not But other than not for sure, I 120 00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:13,719 Speaker 1: kind of I feel the same thing like, you know, 121 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: this morning, you know, my kids slept in. I had 122 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:18,279 Speaker 1: the kids early, and so it's like, you know, I'm 123 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: I'm doing my thing, you know. So when he wakes up, 124 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:23,040 Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, good morning, and it's like I'm I'm 125 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:26,400 Speaker 1: already in my like and he's just like, oh, good morning. 126 00:06:26,440 --> 00:06:28,480 Speaker 1: I was like, no, I'm hi, Like, I'm sorry. I'm 127 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:30,680 Speaker 1: just like I've I've already done the dishes and cleaned 128 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:33,760 Speaker 1: the kid's rooms and did laundry, and yeah, how did 129 00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: you sleep? But I just couldn't meet him there. So 130 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:37,360 Speaker 1: I think he got a little annoyed with me because 131 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:39,400 Speaker 1: I but I'm just like, when I get in my 132 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,840 Speaker 1: like working mode, it's almost like, Hi, okay, get out 133 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:44,599 Speaker 1: of my way, you know, so I can finish cleaning 134 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:46,080 Speaker 1: the let me make the bed now that you're up. 135 00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:48,359 Speaker 1: And so when I get in that mode, I don't 136 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 1: have a hard time having I guess, empathy for others 137 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:55,120 Speaker 1: around me because I'm so narrow minded in work. Does 138 00:06:55,160 --> 00:06:57,679 Speaker 1: that make sense. I'm the same because I like a plan, 139 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,320 Speaker 1: Like I like a day. I like to set my 140 00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:01,839 Speaker 1: day and then just throw it all out the window. 141 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 1: There's no plan. But I'm like, well today I'm going 142 00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:07,200 Speaker 1: to organize the bathroom. He's like, there's nothing in the bathroom. 143 00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:08,680 Speaker 1: What are you going to organize? Like, I don't know, 144 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,520 Speaker 1: just let me do it, right, I'm going to clean. 145 00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:13,680 Speaker 1: I'm like, I just got to do it. But we've 146 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,320 Speaker 1: actually been watching a lot of good shows, so I 147 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:19,080 Speaker 1: feel like which because we just finished Waco and Whoa, 148 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:22,440 Speaker 1: So we're about to start that. It's so good. So 149 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:24,760 Speaker 1: we're about to start that. We just finished Make Millions 150 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:30,200 Speaker 1: on HBO Wild it's about the like monopoly scandal. Oh, 151 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:36,000 Speaker 1: I saw that on your Instagram. I have never I'm 152 00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:39,720 Speaker 1: very like, I get very bored, very easily. No, I 153 00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:42,040 Speaker 1: was so hooked into this. It's just because it's so 154 00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:44,120 Speaker 1: interesting and I don't remember it. I was young, but 155 00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:46,960 Speaker 1: I definitely went to McDonald's. I wanted to win, But 156 00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:53,080 Speaker 1: was it really stolen? Oh twenty four million dollars? Because 157 00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:55,600 Speaker 1: I mean, I know we I know, like we would 158 00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,720 Speaker 1: go and my my brother had the thing and it 159 00:07:57,760 --> 00:07:59,520 Speaker 1: was on the cup I think where you would peel it, 160 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: or it was that on the French fries. I don't remember, 161 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 1: but he would he would do it and I would remember, 162 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,360 Speaker 1: like we kept getting the same one over and over again. 163 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 1: But I don't understand how that could be rigged. They 164 00:08:09,360 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 1: did the person go to every McDonald's or did he 165 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 1: make the game? Tell me? I want to so badly, 166 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 1: but every episode was it's HBO so it's a very 167 00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:21,160 Speaker 1: well put together documentary. They almost kind of made it 168 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,960 Speaker 1: mirror like a movie. Though Ty and I were like, 169 00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 1: I did not see that coming, Like you feel like 170 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:28,840 Speaker 1: it's a show because it's it's too crazy to be real. 171 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:33,920 Speaker 1: But have you seen Waco Tory? I have not. Is 172 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:39,080 Speaker 1: that the that's the that's the cult leader, David Koresh, 173 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:42,480 Speaker 1: the Vidians. I don't want to say that wrong, but 174 00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:46,680 Speaker 1: they were all living in this compound. I'm not going 175 00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:48,439 Speaker 1: to give it away. Y'all should watch it. It's I mean, 176 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,680 Speaker 1: I had to leave the room the last episode because 177 00:08:50,679 --> 00:08:53,480 Speaker 1: I'm like, I can't watch this. Is it a true story? 178 00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,280 Speaker 1: The last twenty minutes it's a true story. It happened 179 00:08:56,320 --> 00:09:00,160 Speaker 1: and I think the eighties, late eighties, nineties, and I 180 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:02,800 Speaker 1: for real got up from bed and Michael's like, where 181 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:05,040 Speaker 1: are you going? I'm like, I can't watch this, Like 182 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,440 Speaker 1: the last twenty minutes, I was like, I can't, Like, 183 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:10,160 Speaker 1: let me know when it's over, because but it's so 184 00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:12,440 Speaker 1: good because in the very beginning it's about this cult leader, 185 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,880 Speaker 1: and the very beginning like well, what's the problem with it? 186 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:17,320 Speaker 1: And minus the polygamy and all that stuff, not saying 187 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:21,920 Speaker 1: polygamy is wrong, but you know, there was some maybe wrongful. 188 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,960 Speaker 1: There was definitely wrong things for sure. But I'm like, 189 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,880 Speaker 1: well his message, you know, and so that's I'm like, 190 00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:31,320 Speaker 1: well that's what it's. You know. That's why they're so good, 191 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:35,640 Speaker 1: those leaders. It's crazy because I was, um, like, I 192 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:37,680 Speaker 1: was really into like Chip and Joanna Gaines, like I 193 00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:39,600 Speaker 1: love them. I watched their show, read their books, and 194 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,160 Speaker 1: that was kind of They never said it, but I 195 00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,400 Speaker 1: think that's why they kind of blew up so big 196 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,760 Speaker 1: because for so long, no one knew where Waco, Texas was, 197 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:48,320 Speaker 1: and the only thing they knew about it if they 198 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,000 Speaker 1: had heard of it, was that. And so for Chip 199 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,960 Speaker 1: and Joanna to really put them back on the map 200 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,400 Speaker 1: and such a good weigh. I forget how many visitors 201 00:09:54,440 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 1: come to wake up or used to go to wake 202 00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:59,120 Speaker 1: up for their silos, but they completely Like now when 203 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,120 Speaker 1: you think Waco, Texas As, you think Chip and Joanna, 204 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 1: and it's like, for so long all you heard about 205 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:10,120 Speaker 1: was that's so crazy. Yeah, that's insane, but it's so good. 206 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:14,240 Speaker 1: Taylor Kitch did an amazing job. He did incredible. He's 207 00:10:14,440 --> 00:10:17,760 Speaker 1: one of friends and he had actually been telling us. 208 00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:19,360 Speaker 1: He lives in Austin, so he had told us about 209 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:21,160 Speaker 1: it before kind of you know how he was like 210 00:10:21,160 --> 00:10:22,599 Speaker 1: getting into it and this is not in the and 211 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:24,920 Speaker 1: I were like, this is gonna be weird. And then 212 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:28,800 Speaker 1: everyone's like he's unbelievable. I didn't even recognize, Like, I mean, 213 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:31,040 Speaker 1: I obviously knew it was him, but I was just like, wow, 214 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 1: like he's was so good in it. Um, guys in 215 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,240 Speaker 1: the two minutes. So excited because we have a One 216 00:10:37,280 --> 00:10:41,160 Speaker 1: Tree Hill reunion. Hillary Burton is going to be zooming 217 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:43,560 Speaker 1: in with us, So so excited to talk to her. 218 00:10:43,679 --> 00:11:01,720 Speaker 1: But first, let's take a break. Hillary, Hi, friend, how 219 00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:04,520 Speaker 1: are you holding up? Oh my goodness. Okay, So we're 220 00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:07,760 Speaker 1: just gonna go right into it. Hillary Burton's on the show. 221 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:10,320 Speaker 1: I love you so much. And this is our guest 222 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:15,560 Speaker 1: co host Sarah Gretzky, who's also on right now. So 223 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:19,520 Speaker 1: your Instagram post the other day, I loved it. You 224 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:22,480 Speaker 1: were showing off the silver lining and I just was like, 225 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:25,360 Speaker 1: he showed you know, your your your grays coming in 226 00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:28,720 Speaker 1: and I thought it was the most but it was beautiful, 227 00:11:29,160 --> 00:11:33,160 Speaker 1: like you look beautiful. Thanks. It's I mean, I have 228 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:36,960 Speaker 1: I have ventured out a couple of times to either 229 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:41,240 Speaker 1: drop off masks or we would drive through pharmacy that 230 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:44,520 Speaker 1: you know, we can go to UM and I see 231 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:49,040 Speaker 1: these people that I've known for years putting their job 232 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: and putting you know, all up before their own self care. 233 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,560 Speaker 1: Everybody's saying, oh, you have to practice self care, you 234 00:11:56,559 --> 00:11:59,199 Speaker 1: have to practice self care. And that's not necessarily a 235 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:02,000 Speaker 1: practical thing for a lot of our front line and 236 00:12:02,080 --> 00:12:05,880 Speaker 1: essential workers. And so if they can see me with 237 00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:09,720 Speaker 1: you know, a couple inches of gray hair, and we 238 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:13,679 Speaker 1: can normalize it a little bit, why not. Who am 239 00:12:13,679 --> 00:12:19,200 Speaker 1: I trying to impress? Jeffrey stuck with me? So because 240 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:22,480 Speaker 1: and you guys are in right, Sarah, you just had 241 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:24,319 Speaker 1: you just she just got married, so she's in like 242 00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:29,920 Speaker 1: the the honeymoon quarantine face. The poor guy saw me 243 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: at a ten. And now we've really just have got nail. Yeah. 244 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:37,920 Speaker 1: I told Michael the other day, I was like, hey, 245 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:39,679 Speaker 1: look at my feet. I've got a French manicure. I 246 00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:41,600 Speaker 1: didn't even do it myself. The toes just grew out 247 00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:46,120 Speaker 1: like the nail polished fancy. Just like that's like ten 248 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:48,400 Speaker 1: steps beyond where I'm at right now. I've turned into 249 00:12:48,440 --> 00:12:53,720 Speaker 1: just like a Neanderthal, which is fine. It's good. We 250 00:12:53,840 --> 00:13:00,560 Speaker 1: had been living an unsustainable pace of stay young, stay cute, 251 00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:03,960 Speaker 1: don't have cellulite, make sure you're waxed, and all that 252 00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:06,120 Speaker 1: kind of crap, and now it's just like, did I 253 00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:10,920 Speaker 1: feed the children? Great. It's so interesting though, too, because 254 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:13,199 Speaker 1: it's like, you know, I'm gonna get real vain here. 255 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:15,600 Speaker 1: But I was like, I've had eyelashes for the past 256 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 1: ten years, and you know, I've I've you been dyeing 257 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,679 Speaker 1: my hair, and honestly, now I'm like, I don't want 258 00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:25,240 Speaker 1: to get eyelashes anytime soon again. I'm fine without it. 259 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:27,040 Speaker 1: And I kind of I'm like, I want to go 260 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:30,360 Speaker 1: back to being brown. It's just something about the natural. 261 00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:35,360 Speaker 1: It just feels more comforting in a weird way. It's 262 00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:39,680 Speaker 1: like a natural reset for every part of you. Yeah, 263 00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 1: and it's more than just vanity. I think we're looking 264 00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:44,439 Speaker 1: at it, particularly our generation, so like a lot of 265 00:13:44,559 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 1: us are mothers at this point, um, and I think 266 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:51,319 Speaker 1: we're looking at what our children are experiencing from us. 267 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:55,160 Speaker 1: And do I want my son to see me standing 268 00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:58,440 Speaker 1: in front of a mirror working on how I look, 269 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,680 Speaker 1: or do I want him to see me actively trying 270 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:07,239 Speaker 1: to help other people, support other people. Um. The optics 271 00:14:07,559 --> 00:14:09,720 Speaker 1: that we put in front of our children right now 272 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:13,080 Speaker 1: are pretty important because they don't get a break from us. 273 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:16,720 Speaker 1: There's no teacher, there's no other adult. Literally, it's just us. 274 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,560 Speaker 1: So the optics of what we're showing our kids is 275 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:24,440 Speaker 1: you know something, I've said it once, I'll say it again. 276 00:14:24,520 --> 00:14:27,800 Speaker 1: I can't. I don't have kids, So shout out to 277 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:33,520 Speaker 1: the moms right now, because I can't even imagine, Hilary, 278 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:38,960 Speaker 1: are you? Are you homeschooling? You know? I had a 279 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,800 Speaker 1: I had an interesting conversation with my son's teacher when 280 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:45,440 Speaker 1: everything first started because I pulled him from school a 281 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,800 Speaker 1: week early. You know, it's it's bad New York. And 282 00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:50,560 Speaker 1: it was bad New York early, and I posted a 283 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:53,200 Speaker 1: picture on Instagram. I want to say it was like 284 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:56,880 Speaker 1: February third, I posted a picture of me wearing a 285 00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,480 Speaker 1: mask on an airplane, and everybody gave me a huge 286 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:04,640 Speaker 1: ration it for it and was just like, oh, you're overreacting. Um. 287 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:10,480 Speaker 1: But I could feel something bad happening. Um, And so 288 00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:12,920 Speaker 1: I pulled him from school a week early. And then 289 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:17,080 Speaker 1: when schools in New York finally did let out. Uh. 290 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:19,040 Speaker 1: I talked to his teacher and I was like, hey, 291 00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:21,720 Speaker 1: I just want you to know, like I don't care 292 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:24,720 Speaker 1: if we repeat fourth grade, like if he graduates at 293 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:29,280 Speaker 1: nineteen instead of twenty or instead of eighteen, I definitely 294 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:32,320 Speaker 1: don't care. I'm just really glad you and your husband 295 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:35,800 Speaker 1: and your family are okay. So no pressure on you. 296 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:40,400 Speaker 1: And she relayed that she hadn't necessarily gotten a lot 297 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,880 Speaker 1: of that. You know, a lot of people are concerned 298 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:45,160 Speaker 1: like how do we stay on course and how do 299 00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:48,080 Speaker 1: we keep our kids from falling behind? And this is 300 00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:51,040 Speaker 1: an opportunity for us to throw away that kind of 301 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:55,760 Speaker 1: aggressive ambition of we've got to get ahead. We can't 302 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,960 Speaker 1: fall behind. If our kids are just learning to be 303 00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:02,880 Speaker 1: solid members of families, you know, helping around the house, 304 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:06,960 Speaker 1: if they're learning to um see different parts of their 305 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 1: community and how valuable they are, that's an important thing, 306 00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:15,360 Speaker 1: you know. I so gust is pretty self motivated. He 307 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:18,320 Speaker 1: does his own like math worksheets and stuff like that. 308 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:22,400 Speaker 1: But mom is not sitting down at the computer like 309 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 1: going well. And that's kind of In the very beginning, 310 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,760 Speaker 1: I felt a little bit of pressure because I kept 311 00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:30,240 Speaker 1: seeing all these posts about you know, mom's homeschooling, and 312 00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:31,880 Speaker 1: I'm like okay, and then I had to kind of 313 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,760 Speaker 1: set myself down and I'm like your daughters, I'm like Janna, 314 00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:38,920 Speaker 1: Jolie's four, you know, so it's like she's still she's 315 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:42,200 Speaker 1: like you know, she's not even in you know, kindergarten yet. 316 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,840 Speaker 1: But and so I'm really only working. She only went 317 00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:46,920 Speaker 1: to preschool three days a week anyways at the time. 318 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, fine, let's not do it. 319 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,120 Speaker 1: Let's not do it every day, Let's do it the 320 00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:54,640 Speaker 1: three times a week again. And if it's fifteen minutes, great, 321 00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:57,120 Speaker 1: you know. And I'm just not putting pressure because I 322 00:16:57,120 --> 00:17:00,680 Speaker 1: found myself being like totally you just that was d 323 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,600 Speaker 1: why are you not calling it eat? And I'm like why, 324 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:04,640 Speaker 1: I was like, whoa, I'm like, I'm not a parent, 325 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:07,000 Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not a teacher. I can't like and 326 00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,800 Speaker 1: I just found myself like losing patients and that's not 327 00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:11,640 Speaker 1: what I wanted from my daughter. So instead I took 328 00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:13,280 Speaker 1: her out there and like, okay, let's go outside and 329 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,320 Speaker 1: you know, find things that start with the letter G, 330 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,960 Speaker 1: and like like I made it more fun for me too, 331 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:22,440 Speaker 1: you know. Well then I have so much respect for teachers, 332 00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:25,880 Speaker 1: So how there I assume that I can just do 333 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:29,080 Speaker 1: their job, you know what I mean? Sure, yeah, I 334 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:32,959 Speaker 1: mean that's really arrogant. I can't do as job. I'm 335 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:36,679 Speaker 1: I'm an idiot. I'm an actor. How's it been on 336 00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:38,520 Speaker 1: How has it been on the relationship? Because me and 337 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,879 Speaker 1: Sarah talked earlier in the episode about how it's just 338 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 1: like the little things were kind of like like stop. Yeah, 339 00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:49,240 Speaker 1: you know, we live on this hunter Acre farm, so 340 00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:54,360 Speaker 1: Jeff is home from work. We're used to quarantining. Um, 341 00:17:54,520 --> 00:17:56,760 Speaker 1: We're used to being on top of each other and 342 00:17:56,840 --> 00:18:00,439 Speaker 1: not seeing anyone else because that has all He's been 343 00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:04,760 Speaker 1: sacred time for our family. So we're still kind of 344 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:08,800 Speaker 1: in that bubble. Dad's never been home for this long. Um, 345 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:12,040 Speaker 1: So the chids are super into it. And for me, 346 00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:16,320 Speaker 1: it's nice having a grown up here, you know, when 347 00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:19,440 Speaker 1: he's shooting the Walking Dead, I'm here by myself. So 348 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:23,280 Speaker 1: every day I'm just so grateful that I can paunt 349 00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:26,080 Speaker 1: them all the children off on him and there's not 350 00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:30,640 Speaker 1: a lot of time for us. Um we started doing this, 351 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:33,480 Speaker 1: I know, I want to talk about Friday Night. Friday 352 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,680 Speaker 1: Night in with the Morgan's what what can viewers expect? 353 00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:40,679 Speaker 1: It's honestly like the one hour a week that we 354 00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:44,119 Speaker 1: get to hang out without the kids and just like 355 00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:48,400 Speaker 1: have grown up time. And I didn't realize how bad 356 00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:52,960 Speaker 1: we needed that. I think he did, um, And so 357 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,359 Speaker 1: he put the wheels in motion and was just like, 358 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,560 Speaker 1: we're gonna we're gonna take a bath. You're wound up, 359 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:02,840 Speaker 1: let's take a here. How what time? Like, where's the show? 360 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:05,560 Speaker 1: And so it's on AMC, but how long? And yeah, 361 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:09,520 Speaker 1: it comes on AMC Fridays at ten pm. And Fridays 362 00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:12,879 Speaker 1: have always been their night for just showing movies. So 363 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:16,640 Speaker 1: I don't think anyone was anticipating this like weird half 364 00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:19,880 Speaker 1: hour break with these two people in their garage. Um. 365 00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:23,520 Speaker 1: But we've aired two episodes and they've been great. You know, 366 00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:28,120 Speaker 1: we've got friends from the AMC family, friends from jobs 367 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,880 Speaker 1: that we've done in the past, and then we also 368 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,720 Speaker 1: have people from our community, so it's not just a 369 00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:36,960 Speaker 1: bunch of celebrities or actors sitting around talking about themselves. 370 00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,520 Speaker 1: You know. In our first episode, we had our personal 371 00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:42,640 Speaker 1: physician that came in and gave a lot of insight 372 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:46,480 Speaker 1: and answered some questions that viewers had and then we 373 00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,639 Speaker 1: had our local farming guru who taught us everything about 374 00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:52,760 Speaker 1: farming and we talked about you know, how we source 375 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:56,360 Speaker 1: our food now, um. And so this coming week we 376 00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:59,360 Speaker 1: have God. Who do we have? Oh? We have Kate Um. 377 00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:01,720 Speaker 1: She is a woman that I made friends within town 378 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:04,960 Speaker 1: who runs all our town fundraisers, so as we're all 379 00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:07,440 Speaker 1: trying to figure out how we can support our communities, 380 00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:10,600 Speaker 1: she gives some really sound advice for people who are 381 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:14,360 Speaker 1: looking to jump into that. That's awesome, And I want 382 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:16,439 Speaker 1: to talk about your new book that's coming out, The 383 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 1: Rural Diaries UM, coming out on May five, But I 384 00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:21,920 Speaker 1: have to ask you just a few one Tree Hill 385 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:25,200 Speaker 1: questions because obviously there's so many. Do you ever get 386 00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:27,800 Speaker 1: sick of people talking about one Tree Hill? You know 387 00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:34,239 Speaker 1: what idea I did perfectly, Frank, I did before all 388 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:38,639 Speaker 1: the Mark stuff came out, because everyone was so like, oh, 389 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:40,840 Speaker 1: that was so wonderful, It was so wonderful, and there 390 00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:42,680 Speaker 1: was this thing in the back of my mind like 391 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:47,040 Speaker 1: it wasn't that wonderful for some of us, UM. And 392 00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:52,560 Speaker 1: by letting that truth UM go and putting it out 393 00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:58,240 Speaker 1: there and not having that nagging secret anymore, It's really 394 00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:02,359 Speaker 1: allowed me to read claim the hard work that I 395 00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:05,520 Speaker 1: put into that show, and are you able to like 396 00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,360 Speaker 1: go back and be like, oh, that was a good 397 00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,760 Speaker 1: memory and he can't take that one away from me. 398 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:14,679 Speaker 1: The good memories for me are with our crew in 399 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 1: North Carolina. I was very very close to our crew 400 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:22,159 Speaker 1: in North Carolina, UM, and with the cast because we 401 00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,320 Speaker 1: grew up together. I mean, Sophia Bush and I were 402 00:21:25,359 --> 00:21:29,040 Speaker 1: twenty when we got cast, and our birthdays are only 403 00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:32,080 Speaker 1: seven days apart, and so she and I turned twenty 404 00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:36,919 Speaker 1: one the exact same week, Season one, episode three, you know, 405 00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:41,160 Speaker 1: and we hit Wilmington like a freaking tornado and it 406 00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:44,520 Speaker 1: was awesome. And so those are the things I hang 407 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:48,400 Speaker 1: on to. UM. But I don't have to pretend about 408 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:51,439 Speaker 1: the other ship anymore. So it's really lightened it for me. 409 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:54,720 Speaker 1: That's good. Was there a Was there an um an 410 00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:58,600 Speaker 1: episode that has always stood out to you in terms 411 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:02,800 Speaker 1: of what I enjoyed? Yeah? Um, yeah, I mean I 412 00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 1: think we knew something special was happening at the state 413 00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:13,199 Speaker 1: championship episode. Um it was season for the Ravens go 414 00:22:13,560 --> 00:22:21,080 Speaker 1: to was it four? But I know there's some Yeah, 415 00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:23,280 Speaker 1: Chad and I were told They're like, listen, you only 416 00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:26,080 Speaker 1: get two takes. We have to shoot it with this 417 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:30,840 Speaker 1: like big huge crane. All these extras are gonna go away. Um, 418 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:33,840 Speaker 1: so you get zero chances to mess this up. It 419 00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:37,680 Speaker 1: has to look like the best kiss ever. And we're 420 00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:42,439 Speaker 1: like okay, Um, But it was great because we were 421 00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:44,520 Speaker 1: all on a field trip and Raleigh. We would all 422 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:47,000 Speaker 1: like go to the hotel bar afterwards and have a 423 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:50,639 Speaker 1: good time and it was a really nice Um. It 424 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:52,760 Speaker 1: was a nice field trip to go on with everybody. 425 00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:55,359 Speaker 1: Did you have any regrets leaving or was it something 426 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,919 Speaker 1: like you knew that you were ready? I don't regret 427 00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:02,280 Speaker 1: at all. A new I knew that I I need 428 00:23:02,280 --> 00:23:05,560 Speaker 1: to start something new. It was time. I had a 429 00:23:05,600 --> 00:23:07,880 Speaker 1: big chip on my shoulder and I needed to just 430 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:12,359 Speaker 1: put it down. Um. Hey, Tori, I know you have 431 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:15,040 Speaker 1: a question you want to ask. Go for a bed, hi. 432 00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:18,720 Speaker 1: If are you happy with the way you guys ended 433 00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,719 Speaker 1: your story? You and Lucas like the drive away scene. 434 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:24,240 Speaker 1: Did you have any part in that or would you 435 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,240 Speaker 1: have changed it in any way? Um? No, I was. 436 00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,480 Speaker 1: I was really happy with that. You know, Chad and 437 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:32,800 Speaker 1: I had been in the pilot and you know, We've 438 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:37,000 Speaker 1: been setting up the whole Lucas Peyton star cross lovers 439 00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:41,120 Speaker 1: thing the whole run of our our time on the show. UM. 440 00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:44,399 Speaker 1: So I was really happy with that happy ending, you know, 441 00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:48,600 Speaker 1: like the marriage and the baby family complete, because that's 442 00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,120 Speaker 1: what both of those characters had always been looking for. 443 00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:55,679 Speaker 1: Lucas never had a dad, Peyton's parental situation was deeply 444 00:23:56,240 --> 00:24:00,760 Speaker 1: can I say that, um and uh? And so they 445 00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,679 Speaker 1: both got that kind of nuclear family that they had 446 00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:07,280 Speaker 1: always been craving. And frankly, I was a little concerned 447 00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,800 Speaker 1: that if I stayed on the show that it would 448 00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:14,320 Speaker 1: get messed with for my dramatic purposes. So sometimes it's 449 00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:17,960 Speaker 1: better to cut out in a good spot. Did you 450 00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:22,000 Speaker 1: did you ever last one? Tory, last one? Last one? 451 00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:26,480 Speaker 1: Just literally did you guys know that you were going 452 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:28,560 Speaker 1: to end up together? Or was there like every time 453 00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:29,840 Speaker 1: you got the script was gonna be like, oh, is 454 00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:32,880 Speaker 1: it gonna be me? Or is it going to be well? 455 00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:35,560 Speaker 1: In the beginning, it was like, oh, yeah, you know, 456 00:24:35,880 --> 00:24:39,000 Speaker 1: Peyton and Lucas, Peyton and Lucas, and then Brian Greenberg 457 00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:42,879 Speaker 1: came on the show, and it was like Peyton and Jake, 458 00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:48,640 Speaker 1: what's that about? Um? That's cool. And I had been 459 00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:53,120 Speaker 1: told at that point, which must have been like season three, 460 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,560 Speaker 1: like oh no, Brook and Lucas or end game and 461 00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:58,280 Speaker 1: Jake and Peyton or end game, and I was like 462 00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:03,280 Speaker 1: huh and arresting okay. And I think that was just 463 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:07,960 Speaker 1: to throw me off, honestly, because the game plan ended 464 00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:12,080 Speaker 1: up being exactly what it had been in the beginning. Um, 465 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,720 Speaker 1: So I think that was just to throw me off 466 00:25:14,760 --> 00:25:17,680 Speaker 1: a little bit, which made me make different choices. As 467 00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:21,280 Speaker 1: an actor, sometimes you have to lie to actors. Well, 468 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:24,240 Speaker 1: I'm glad that you didn't let the whole situation, you know, 469 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:26,680 Speaker 1: with the creator, you know, ruined that for you, because 470 00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,159 Speaker 1: that's you know, like you said, you worked your ass 471 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:32,320 Speaker 1: off and you know you should hold on to, you know, 472 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:34,560 Speaker 1: the good memories from it and not let someone, you know, 473 00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:36,840 Speaker 1: especially a man, take that away from me. So I'm 474 00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:41,200 Speaker 1: glad that you're happy. You know, we had we had fun. Yeah, 475 00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:43,840 Speaker 1: it's you know, it's a small town and everyone's young, 476 00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,480 Speaker 1: and you know, I know like when we when I 477 00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,560 Speaker 1: came on there, it was already very clicky and had 478 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,879 Speaker 1: their clicks and it was just it was a it 479 00:25:50,960 --> 00:25:53,640 Speaker 1: was very hard to tiptoe in you know, so when 480 00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:56,399 Speaker 1: it's your first job, right, Like I had worked at MTV. 481 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,840 Speaker 1: But when I was at MTV, it was very taboo 482 00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:02,639 Speaker 1: to hang out with the talent, like when your guests 483 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,359 Speaker 1: came on, Like you didn't go out with Nellie for 484 00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:09,119 Speaker 1: drinks afterwards, Like you didn't try. But yes, it's relate. 485 00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:13,320 Speaker 1: You know. That was tacky. It's like re crew their 486 00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:17,680 Speaker 1: talent seven. So for me on the show, I had 487 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:22,120 Speaker 1: to relearn how to hang out with talent um and 488 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,440 Speaker 1: get over that kind of obstacle of what I've been 489 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:31,359 Speaker 1: trained with um. And yeah, I mean when you're young 490 00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,240 Speaker 1: and you're in a small town and it's your first 491 00:26:33,280 --> 00:26:38,000 Speaker 1: acting job, you don't know what's toxic. You don't know 492 00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:40,840 Speaker 1: what normal is. So when I took my first job 493 00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:44,679 Speaker 1: after that, white collar and I fully expected it to 494 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:48,159 Speaker 1: be the same exact deal, and it wasn't. It was 495 00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:51,680 Speaker 1: so loving, it was so tender, it was so protective. 496 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,720 Speaker 1: And I remember being in the van with a bunch 497 00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:59,080 Speaker 1: of the writers from the show kind of laughing telling 498 00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,240 Speaker 1: them some of the uff that had gone down on 499 00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:05,560 Speaker 1: One Tree Hill, and one of the men just stopped 500 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:08,960 Speaker 1: me and was like, babies, that's not okay. Did you 501 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:16,320 Speaker 1: say baby when I'm getting this baby? It was yeah, 502 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:19,600 Speaker 1: and it was That was a really jarring moment, and 503 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:23,200 Speaker 1: I all of a sudden was so embarrassed, like, oh no, 504 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:27,400 Speaker 1: that was my normal. So um, working all these subsequent 505 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:31,560 Speaker 1: jobs and learning what normal is has been really rewarding. 506 00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:35,080 Speaker 1: And it's good to see really honest, wonderful people in 507 00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,480 Speaker 1: our industry because there's so many of them. For sure. 508 00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:40,160 Speaker 1: That's awesome. Okay, tell us about the Rural Diaries that's 509 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,200 Speaker 1: coming out May fifth. It's a book that you wrote, 510 00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:45,639 Speaker 1: and like, give us, give us everything, the inspiration, what 511 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:48,600 Speaker 1: it's about. Yeah, I mean I started writing it right 512 00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:51,879 Speaker 1: when I joined social media because I saw this whole 513 00:27:52,040 --> 00:27:55,840 Speaker 1: um facade of isn't my life glamorous? And that had 514 00:27:55,880 --> 00:28:00,520 Speaker 1: always kind of been my um resistance to owning social 515 00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:04,200 Speaker 1: media because I didn't want to feed into that false narrative. Um, 516 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:06,480 Speaker 1: So I started writing this book about leaving l A 517 00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:09,600 Speaker 1: and leaving a place that made me feel very insecure 518 00:28:09,680 --> 00:28:13,639 Speaker 1: and small and moving to this rural farming community where 519 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:16,359 Speaker 1: I'm isolated on a farm for the first time in 520 00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:19,560 Speaker 1: my life. There's not an audience. You know, I have 521 00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:23,600 Speaker 1: to learn to like myself and that was really really hard. 522 00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:26,960 Speaker 1: Um So maybe a lot of the steps people are 523 00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,520 Speaker 1: going through and quarantine right now, where they're isolated and 524 00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:33,399 Speaker 1: they're dealing with just themselves for the first time. I 525 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:37,040 Speaker 1: feel like I kind of did that in moving here. Um. 526 00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:40,560 Speaker 1: And it's not pretty all the time. It's messy, and 527 00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:44,320 Speaker 1: I wanted to cop to my failures so that other 528 00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:48,080 Speaker 1: people who may be feeling vulnerable or insecure can see 529 00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:50,880 Speaker 1: it as a road map of like, Okay, well this 530 00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:53,280 Speaker 1: is how I get out of this. Um. I was 531 00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:56,960 Speaker 1: fortunate enough that when I was pretty low, there were 532 00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:00,800 Speaker 1: books out there that really helped me navigate my own feelings. 533 00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:03,440 Speaker 1: And so, you know, that's the job of an artist, 534 00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:06,880 Speaker 1: you help people navigate. And so if our book can 535 00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 1: do that, cool. What's the one thing that gets you 536 00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:11,840 Speaker 1: down the lowest, like your insecurity? And then like and 537 00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:17,280 Speaker 1: then what helps you, you know, get out of that place? Oh? Man? Um. 538 00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:25,760 Speaker 1: I I'm a pleaser and I try really really hard. 539 00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:29,640 Speaker 1: And so sometimes when I'm in situations and I've tried 540 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:33,600 Speaker 1: too hard, I walk away and I just know that 541 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:37,920 Speaker 1: everyone's exhausted by me, or they're laughing at me, or 542 00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:43,080 Speaker 1: they're they're skeptical of you know, like I I worry 543 00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:47,760 Speaker 1: that I overwhelmed people. Um, and then I just have 544 00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:51,800 Speaker 1: to get out of my own head and and remind 545 00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:56,120 Speaker 1: myself like I tried, you know, and trying is the 546 00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:59,680 Speaker 1: bravest thing a person can do. And I'm not going 547 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:02,960 Speaker 1: to succeed every time I try. I'm just not. But 548 00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:06,680 Speaker 1: if I succeed some of the time, that's a win. Um. 549 00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:11,600 Speaker 1: And yeah, it's almost like setting expectations for yourself in 550 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,800 Speaker 1: a way, I set really high expectations. I think when 551 00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:18,400 Speaker 1: you're one of a lot of kids, you um find 552 00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:20,840 Speaker 1: your way to get attention. And my way to get 553 00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:24,200 Speaker 1: attention was always by being like Tata, I'm gonna make 554 00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:26,960 Speaker 1: straight a's and I'm gonna be the president of every 555 00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:31,440 Speaker 1: club and I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna do that. Um. 556 00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:34,920 Speaker 1: And then people don't like you because you're too loud, 557 00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:38,200 Speaker 1: but you're like trying. It's like look, look, look, I'm like, yeah, 558 00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:43,200 Speaker 1: I'm trying so hard to do good. Um. And so 559 00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:45,959 Speaker 1: it's more important to focus on the people that do 560 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:51,800 Speaker 1: like you and uh and nurture those real relationships as 561 00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:55,640 Speaker 1: opposed to worrying about the anonymous other that thinks you're 562 00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:59,000 Speaker 1: a big door for sure. Well, Hillary, I'm so excited 563 00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:02,280 Speaker 1: to read read your book. It's out May five, Rural Diaries. 564 00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,920 Speaker 1: I'm like, rural Rural Diaries. Did you call it that? 565 00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:08,920 Speaker 1: It's so hard? No, it's not. It's just me. I 566 00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:13,040 Speaker 1: can't talk, So Rural Diaries May five. Um, and then 567 00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:14,960 Speaker 1: make sure to watch Friday Night In with the Morgan's 568 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,240 Speaker 1: airs Friday's at ten pm at amc um. Hillary, thank 569 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:20,440 Speaker 1: you for always being so sweet. I know I met 570 00:31:20,440 --> 00:31:22,920 Speaker 1: you for the first time just um a few months ago, 571 00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:26,440 Speaker 1: and you just you're so sweet, so in inviting, and 572 00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:29,240 Speaker 1: I just I appreciate your energy in your lights. So 573 00:31:29,320 --> 00:31:31,479 Speaker 1: thank you. Well did you do this show? Thank you 574 00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:34,200 Speaker 1: so much. Of course, thanks for coming on. We love you. 575 00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:39,200 Speaker 1: But baby, they say, oh I love her you You're 576 00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:43,200 Speaker 1: a shining star. I just let you take it and run. Well, 577 00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:45,200 Speaker 1: you know, because I didn't want to call you out. 578 00:31:45,240 --> 00:31:48,160 Speaker 1: I'm saying you didn't watch one. You know. I feel like, 579 00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,440 Speaker 1: for a moment, I found myself as a podcaster and 580 00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,200 Speaker 1: I was just listening and I was like, oh, wow, 581 00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:57,440 Speaker 1: this is really interesting. I don't know what they're talking about, 582 00:31:57,520 --> 00:32:01,120 Speaker 1: but I gotta watch this show. But you were just 583 00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:07,000 Speaker 1: like a modern day Diane. Wow. Thanks Sarah. I mean 584 00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:09,960 Speaker 1: Tori too, I was I became a publicist. To Tori 585 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:11,880 Speaker 1: was like and then and then and then did you 586 00:32:11,920 --> 00:32:14,200 Speaker 1: want to because I knew there are publicists actually on 587 00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:16,240 Speaker 1: I'm like, I can't. I can't ask because you know, 588 00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:18,760 Speaker 1: obviously she's on our book tour, so I don't want 589 00:32:18,800 --> 00:32:20,600 Speaker 1: to ask. I have to ask, you know, about our 590 00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:23,600 Speaker 1: book mostly and so but I knew I had to 591 00:32:23,640 --> 00:32:25,880 Speaker 1: eat obviously from my wind down listeners like give some 592 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,840 Speaker 1: Chree Hill topics, and Tori's like, but but but but 593 00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:34,320 Speaker 1: but but Lucas, pick me, pick me. I have a question. Uh, 594 00:32:34,600 --> 00:32:37,520 Speaker 1: it's too good. I hate that. I hate, you know what. 595 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:40,120 Speaker 1: I hate from that because I just love her so much. 596 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:44,320 Speaker 1: I hate that someone can take away happy memories. But 597 00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:47,840 Speaker 1: here's the interesting thing that I've learned. They can't, but 598 00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:51,040 Speaker 1: we allow them to. I would sit in therapy and 599 00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:54,600 Speaker 1: be like, you took you know, are what you took this? 600 00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:57,080 Speaker 1: You took that. And it's like my therapist is like, 601 00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:59,640 Speaker 1: he didn't take any of it from you, and I'm like, what, yes, 602 00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:01,480 Speaker 1: he did it, because he did blah lah lah and 603 00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:05,480 Speaker 1: She's like, no, you're allowing him to take like that's 604 00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:08,960 Speaker 1: still your memory, and you like, that's your memory that 605 00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:13,760 Speaker 1: was still yours and he can't take that from you. 606 00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:16,200 Speaker 1: And he can he can maybe hurt the memory, you know, 607 00:33:16,280 --> 00:33:19,040 Speaker 1: by you being sad, but he can't take those memories 608 00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:21,480 Speaker 1: from you. So it's just it's interested in the control 609 00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:23,880 Speaker 1: that we let someone have when it's our memories. And 610 00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:26,720 Speaker 1: I feel like that goes with like everything, Like even now, 611 00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:32,040 Speaker 1: it's like it's like positive vibes and like positive mantras 612 00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:34,320 Speaker 1: with like everything going on, and I'm like, I'm not 613 00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:36,280 Speaker 1: gonna let this day. I'm not gonna watch the news 614 00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,280 Speaker 1: for twelve hours. I'm not gonna let this day like 615 00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:41,520 Speaker 1: suck the life out of me. I'm going to you know, 616 00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:47,160 Speaker 1: change my mindset and put out positive vibes and just 617 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:49,640 Speaker 1: go into each day with a different mindset because it's like, 618 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:53,680 Speaker 1: you're right, we don't let things, sorry, we let things 619 00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:56,920 Speaker 1: change and be taken from us. If if we can 620 00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,600 Speaker 1: just kind of train our mind or are you know, 621 00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:05,320 Speaker 1: soul whatever you want to go into to just letting 622 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:08,879 Speaker 1: go and not holding onto it, I feel like then 623 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,120 Speaker 1: it's like, Okay, I'm at peace with it, and I 624 00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:17,000 Speaker 1: can sure. It's almost like quarantine is the bad boyfriend, 625 00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,759 Speaker 1: and we're not going to let the bad boyfriend take 626 00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:23,480 Speaker 1: our memories of every day. One thousand and I read 627 00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:25,160 Speaker 1: the funniest thing the other day. I don't know, I 628 00:34:25,200 --> 00:34:26,880 Speaker 1: feel like it's all just like popping up because like 629 00:34:26,920 --> 00:34:29,239 Speaker 1: you guys did that, like does your ex text you? 630 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:30,840 Speaker 1: And then this other thing popped up that was like, 631 00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:33,640 Speaker 1: don't like whenever you're having a bad day, just remember 632 00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:40,720 Speaker 1: someone's quarantined with your ex, and I literally die, so good. 633 00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:44,600 Speaker 1: My another thing going around too about cat and natpost. 634 00:34:44,640 --> 00:34:47,080 Speaker 1: It's something that was really funny and is basically like 635 00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:50,520 Speaker 1: what your husband can say from terrible, too okay, too 636 00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:53,960 Speaker 1: good to the best answer, and it was like geez, honey, 637 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,359 Speaker 1: you wearing sweatpants again, and then like he can say 638 00:34:56,400 --> 00:34:58,719 Speaker 1: instead say wow, I really like the sweatpants on you, 639 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,799 Speaker 1: or here, babe, be like have some flowers you look, 640 00:35:01,880 --> 00:35:04,040 Speaker 1: you know, beautiful, And the next one on like on 641 00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:06,440 Speaker 1: the right side the right answer was like here, honey, 642 00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,239 Speaker 1: have some wine. Like that was the number one thing 643 00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:11,960 Speaker 1: to say, like you've worked hard today, here's some wine. 644 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:14,920 Speaker 1: I've seen the funniest videos of like all the moms 645 00:35:14,920 --> 00:35:17,560 Speaker 1: like pouring their wine to like music, and like Molly 646 00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:20,160 Speaker 1: Sims has really funny mom content out there that was 647 00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:22,520 Speaker 1: making me laugh. Oh yeah, she's she was really funny. 648 00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:25,239 Speaker 1: But no, back to Hillary, She's awesome. Love her and 649 00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:27,600 Speaker 1: make sure you guys get their rural diaries out. May five. 650 00:35:28,080 --> 00:35:43,080 Speaker 1: Let's take a break. Okay, you guys right, some emails, yep, 651 00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,480 Speaker 1: let's hit it. Sarah, I'm really glad you're on this 652 00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:52,000 Speaker 1: one from Carly. My boyfriend won't propose. Oh book, sorry, 653 00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:53,960 Speaker 1: my coffee machines going if you I don't know if 654 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:57,920 Speaker 1: you can hear it. I have an amazing boyfriend of 655 00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:01,720 Speaker 1: three years. I am twenty twenty three and he's twenty four. 656 00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:04,520 Speaker 1: I'm ready to get married, but he still wants to 657 00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:06,399 Speaker 1: wait for at least a year or two. I feel 658 00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:08,200 Speaker 1: as though I'm getting to the point of just being 659 00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:10,799 Speaker 1: tired of wanting something so bad but him not having 660 00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,880 Speaker 1: any interest. I'm very ill fashioned and wanted to be 661 00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:16,319 Speaker 1: married before moving in together, but he always says how 662 00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:18,239 Speaker 1: he can't wait to live together and come home to 663 00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,160 Speaker 1: me and all these sweet things, but he won't make 664 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:23,000 Speaker 1: that commitment and propose. He says it's just because he 665 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 1: wants to wait until it's the perfect timing for us. 666 00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:27,279 Speaker 1: Any advice on how to get through to him or 667 00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:29,120 Speaker 1: how to stay sane. I just worry I won't be 668 00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:32,040 Speaker 1: able to hope for a day that might not come. 669 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,920 Speaker 1: Thoughts Sarah, Oh my god, I have so much PTSD. 670 00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:40,040 Speaker 1: I just like, can't I know. This is like my 671 00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,000 Speaker 1: d MS all the time, And I just feel so 672 00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:45,759 Speaker 1: bad because it's like I don't like no one ever 673 00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:49,239 Speaker 1: gave me the perfect advice right, because everyone's different, Every 674 00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:52,080 Speaker 1: guy is different, every girl is different. All I can 675 00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:59,680 Speaker 1: say is that is young. And I always knew I 676 00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:02,200 Speaker 1: had in my mind Okay, I'm not ready. I'm not ready. 677 00:37:02,239 --> 00:37:04,920 Speaker 1: I'm not ready. But once I knew I was ready, 678 00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:09,560 Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, I'm hitting my point of not 679 00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:15,799 Speaker 1: being able to justify or understand your reason for waiting. Now, 680 00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:20,240 Speaker 1: we lived together, so that's different. But I just don't 681 00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:23,279 Speaker 1: think you can Hello. I gave an ultimatum. It didn't work, 682 00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:25,560 Speaker 1: So I'm not gonna sit here and say that. I 683 00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,680 Speaker 1: just don't think you can force someone. And I don't 684 00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:32,160 Speaker 1: think you want to force someone. I think that I 685 00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:34,799 Speaker 1: don't know what their relationship is obviously time knew how 686 00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:38,440 Speaker 1: I felt inside and out. He knew exactly what I 687 00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:43,080 Speaker 1: thought and how I was feeling. But I think that 688 00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:47,959 Speaker 1: look in your heart, you know, right, like your gut, 689 00:37:48,040 --> 00:37:52,000 Speaker 1: you know everything. I knew I was going to have 690 00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:55,440 Speaker 1: to wait longer than I wanted if if we were 691 00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:56,880 Speaker 1: going to get married, I knew he was going to 692 00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,440 Speaker 1: do it, but I knew it wasn't going to be 693 00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:01,319 Speaker 1: on my time. And so I feel like that's all 694 00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,080 Speaker 1: you just have to listen to your gut, like is 695 00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:05,640 Speaker 1: this guy worth it? Do you get a feeling that 696 00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:07,520 Speaker 1: he really means it? Or do you think he's stringing 697 00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:10,880 Speaker 1: you along? And in your heart you know what you 698 00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:14,000 Speaker 1: have to do. But yeah, and I and I want 699 00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:16,480 Speaker 1: to say, Okay, you know you're twenty three, you're young. 700 00:38:16,719 --> 00:38:19,000 Speaker 1: You know he just wants to wait another year. But 701 00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:23,120 Speaker 1: I feel like I feel bad saying that because I'm 702 00:38:23,160 --> 00:38:26,359 Speaker 1: sure she's like, don't say I'm young. I because because 703 00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:29,080 Speaker 1: I look at my friend Julie and she's she's twenty 704 00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:31,440 Speaker 1: four and she's married with a kid, or she's married 705 00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:33,880 Speaker 1: and pregnant. So it's like, and my first instinct was 706 00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:36,520 Speaker 1: to say, oh, you're young, but you know, if I 707 00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:39,040 Speaker 1: had it that way, I probably would have wanted to 708 00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:41,520 Speaker 1: younger anyway, because I always wanted to be a young mom. 709 00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:45,720 Speaker 1: So I feel guilty saying, oh, you're young, like just wait, 710 00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:48,320 Speaker 1: because that is my first reaction, you know, being thirties 711 00:38:48,320 --> 00:38:51,319 Speaker 1: six years old and being like you're young but totally good. 712 00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:53,640 Speaker 1: That's why I hate giving people advice because it's like 713 00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:59,160 Speaker 1: everyone's different. Every guy has a different reason. Every girl, 714 00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:02,520 Speaker 1: Like Tie and I both knew we wanted to have kids, 715 00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:05,120 Speaker 1: so that was like our main Like I knew we 716 00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:07,680 Speaker 1: were going to meet up eventually because I knew that 717 00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:10,279 Speaker 1: we both wanted that sure, and I would just say 718 00:39:10,280 --> 00:39:13,600 Speaker 1: to Carly, hey, you know, if you you get to 719 00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:17,000 Speaker 1: your point like Sarah said, where you'd rather not be 720 00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:19,399 Speaker 1: with him and move on, then that's when you know 721 00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:22,560 Speaker 1: that you're ready to walk away. Once it starts affecting 722 00:39:23,520 --> 00:39:27,840 Speaker 1: like your mood and like you wake up angry every day, 723 00:39:27,960 --> 00:39:32,760 Speaker 1: that's not good because that's just not good. All right, Okay, 724 00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:35,279 Speaker 1: so what because I'm twenty five, so I feel like 725 00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:39,200 Speaker 1: my group is saying, well, if our next step is 726 00:39:39,239 --> 00:39:41,719 Speaker 1: to move in together versus get married, but does that 727 00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:44,200 Speaker 1: hurt your relationship or help your relationship, or what if 728 00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:45,560 Speaker 1: he says, I'm not going to propose to you, but 729 00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:47,640 Speaker 1: we can move in together. If she's old fashioned, no, 730 00:39:47,719 --> 00:39:49,720 Speaker 1: that's almost like if Sarah was to have a baby 731 00:39:49,719 --> 00:39:52,160 Speaker 1: before getting married, Like that's not what she wanted, you know, 732 00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:56,719 Speaker 1: And so it's I think if if she should respect him, 733 00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:59,200 Speaker 1: he should respect her wishes. So if you don't want 734 00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:01,160 Speaker 1: to move in right away, I then wait a year 735 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:03,880 Speaker 1: to get engaged, almost as like you guys are like 736 00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:07,600 Speaker 1: meeting halfway. I looked at that as like I was happy. 737 00:40:07,600 --> 00:40:08,920 Speaker 1: When I was like, let's move in, I was like, 738 00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:11,080 Speaker 1: I'll take it because at that point it had been 739 00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:12,880 Speaker 1: five years. So I'm like, I'll take a move in 740 00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:16,040 Speaker 1: because but if you've been together with someone for a 741 00:40:16,120 --> 00:40:18,160 Speaker 1: year and then they asked you to move in, sometimes 742 00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:21,239 Speaker 1: that can prolong it. So I don't know all right 743 00:40:21,480 --> 00:40:23,879 Speaker 1: from see how to get through it. My husband I've 744 00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:26,880 Speaker 1: been together for over five years, married for almost two. 745 00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,239 Speaker 1: We recently found out we were expecting our first as well. 746 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,480 Speaker 1: Since the beginning of our relationship, my husband has had 747 00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:35,280 Speaker 1: problems with dating apps. The first two years, he acted 748 00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:38,359 Speaker 1: out and cheated on me. Things stopped while we were 749 00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:41,760 Speaker 1: engaged um in the beginning of our marriage until recently 750 00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:44,160 Speaker 1: a girlfriend of mine found him on a dating app. 751 00:40:44,239 --> 00:40:46,440 Speaker 1: I con front of him. He's finally getting some counseling 752 00:40:46,440 --> 00:40:48,400 Speaker 1: that he truly needs. My question is, Janna, how do 753 00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,759 Speaker 1: you sit there and be so mad at him but 754 00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:52,560 Speaker 1: want to hug Mike at the same time. How do 755 00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:54,480 Speaker 1: you get through the thoughts of maybe I'm not good 756 00:40:54,560 --> 00:41:01,919 Speaker 1: enough for him? Mhm, Sarah, I thought off. I mean, 757 00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:08,400 Speaker 1: I don't know what to answer this. It's hard when 758 00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:10,719 Speaker 1: you can have empathy for someone that's going through hard time, 759 00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:13,879 Speaker 1: like I have empathy for the things that Mike struggles with, 760 00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:18,280 Speaker 1: so I want to embrace him. And when he shares 761 00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:20,799 Speaker 1: some of the struggles with me, I embrace him even 762 00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:26,960 Speaker 1: though it might hurt and might trigger me. I still UM, 763 00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:34,120 Speaker 1: I would still want to, you know, UM, be there 764 00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:37,240 Speaker 1: for him. UM. But it's hard. It's so hard because 765 00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:42,520 Speaker 1: you're still angry at their actions. UM. And then how 766 00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:43,880 Speaker 1: do you get through the thoughts of maybe I'm not 767 00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:48,319 Speaker 1: good enough? Those thoughts have stayed with me probably it's 768 00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:51,160 Speaker 1: been what for almost three and a half years since discovery. 769 00:41:51,280 --> 00:41:54,080 Speaker 1: For the past three years, it's I think it's I 770 00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:59,000 Speaker 1: finally hit my mark about probably it was January this 771 00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:00,640 Speaker 1: year where I find it was like, you know what, 772 00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:02,480 Speaker 1: it's not because I don't have big enough boobs. It's 773 00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:04,319 Speaker 1: not because of this. It's not because of that. I'm 774 00:42:04,360 --> 00:42:08,879 Speaker 1: finally it's not me that's not good enough. He has 775 00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:11,960 Speaker 1: have he believed something in himself that he doesn't think 776 00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:14,839 Speaker 1: is good enough. So I now can have empathy for that, 777 00:42:14,920 --> 00:42:16,880 Speaker 1: but I don't beat myself up anymore. Like, man, if 778 00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:18,719 Speaker 1: I would have just dressed up a little bit more, 779 00:42:18,760 --> 00:42:20,960 Speaker 1: if I would have, you know, had bigger boobs sometimes, 780 00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:23,319 Speaker 1: you know what I like, perkier boobs than what I have. Sure, 781 00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:25,919 Speaker 1: but it's not the reason why he stepped out. It's 782 00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:28,799 Speaker 1: just not. But it's hard. That took me over three 783 00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:32,640 Speaker 1: years to even think that or get to like finally 784 00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:36,600 Speaker 1: get to that place. So I mean that's hard for 785 00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:40,279 Speaker 1: people to once they finally realize it because for so long. Yeah, 786 00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:43,000 Speaker 1: I mean, even if there is no issues, everyone's insecure. 787 00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:47,440 Speaker 1: But for you, what I didn't it's not my fault. 788 00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:50,759 Speaker 1: I didn't cause this. I didn't do that is I 789 00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:53,880 Speaker 1: feel like a big stuff for someone, Alright, So if 790 00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:56,520 Speaker 1: you guys have any emails. UM, of course email us 791 00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,120 Speaker 1: or you can DM me at the wind Down podcast, 792 00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:03,840 Speaker 1: which UM were currently you like how it's just the 793 00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:07,879 Speaker 1: nanny lost her job so I had to give her 794 00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:12,600 Speaker 1: a side hustle. So she's been Yeah she I still 795 00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:14,040 Speaker 1: go on there, Me and Mike still go on there. 796 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:15,399 Speaker 1: And we look at the d m s and we 797 00:43:15,400 --> 00:43:18,360 Speaker 1: were pulling some d ms from there, um to answer 798 00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:21,920 Speaker 1: and stuff and yeah, but yeah, she's she's she's killing it. 799 00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:24,880 Speaker 1: It's like a good it's got a good like I know, 800 00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:31,239 Speaker 1: I know. But Sarah Torrik, thanks for joining us on 801 00:43:31,280 --> 00:43:36,839 Speaker 1: an all girls wine down Zoom quarantine session. Girls, next 802 00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:43,160 Speaker 1: time we need wine, yeah seriously. Um, alright, girls, I 803 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,840 Speaker 1: love you and everyone out there, stay safe, stay healthy, 804 00:43:46,000 --> 00:43:51,080 Speaker 1: and um six ft apart, I guess all right, Bye 805 00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:59,799 Speaker 1: bye