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Speaker 1: Hey, guys, welcome to another episode of Selective Ignorance. However,

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Speaker 1: before we get to this week's episode, I want to

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Speaker 1: remind you guys to purchase my book, No Holds Barred,

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Speaker 1: a dual manifesto of sexual exploration and power. It is

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Speaker 1: currently available for pre order and I would love for

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Speaker 1: you to help me become a New York Times bestseller.

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Speaker 1: So feel free to go to your local bookstores preferably

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Speaker 1: queer owned, black owned, or woman owned to support them,

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Speaker 1: but also just click the button on Amazon, Barnes and Nobles,

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Speaker 1: or wherever you read your books.

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Speaker 2: Again.

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Speaker 1: That is No Holds Barred, a dual manifesto of sexual

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Speaker 1: exploration and power, written by yours truly and my co

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Speaker 1: host of the Decisions Decisions podcast, Weezy.

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Speaker 2: Make sure y'all get that. Now, let's get to.

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Speaker 1: This week's episode. All right, y'all, let's get uncomfortable real quick.

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Speaker 2: Today.

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Speaker 1: I want to talk about something that's been bruin in

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Speaker 1: my spirit and I need us to be real growing

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Speaker 1: about it. This one is for the lady. We see

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Speaker 1: a play out time and time again. A woman gets

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Speaker 1: a man who has red flags waving like the fourth

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Speaker 1: of July. He's got a checkered past, known history of cheating, abuse, toxicity, manipulation,

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Speaker 1: you name it.

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Speaker 2: And what does she do? She walks right into the fire.

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Speaker 3: Like she's flame resistant.

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Speaker 1: Then when it all goes left, and it always goes left,

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Speaker 1: everybody want to cry foul, call.

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Speaker 2: Her a victim, and act shot. Now, before y'all jump

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Speaker 2: down my throat, let me be clear.

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Speaker 1: Y'all know I'm an equal opportunist and I will hold

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Speaker 1: both parties accountable. Nobody deserves to be abused, manipulated, or

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Speaker 1: gas lit.

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Speaker 2: Period.

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Speaker 1: But here's my question, Okay, where do we as women

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Speaker 1: put responsibility on us?

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Speaker 2: Is it possible to hold space for a woman's pain?

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Speaker 1: But still ask sis, what made you think you could

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Speaker 1: change him? What made you ignore what he did to

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Speaker 1: the last three women? Because if we're being honest, you

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Speaker 1: saw it coming. You just thought you'd be the exception.

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Speaker 1: But also, as we constantly ask people to believe women,

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Speaker 1: why is it that many women choose to actually ignore

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Speaker 1: the warning signs from women? So now the relationship crashes,

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Speaker 1: burns publicly, and here comes the performative empathy. Poor her,

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Speaker 1: he's a monster, and maybe he is, But where's the

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Speaker 1: accountability for walking in with your eyes wide shut.

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Speaker 3: I'm legally blind. I could see barely.

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Speaker 2: And let's take it even further, because that's what I do.

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Speaker 2: I can go through with that promise. Should we even care?

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Speaker 1: Is it our business to sympathize, dissect, judge, or defend

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Speaker 1: or we just addicted to the trauma of women, especially

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Speaker 1: black women, being publicly torn down.

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Speaker 2: This ain't about blame.

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Speaker 1: It's about truth, and the truth is ignoring red flags

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Speaker 1: doesn't make you a bad person, but it doesn't make

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Speaker 1: you innocent either. So today we're gonna unpack all of

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Speaker 1: that where accountability meets sympathy and why some folks out

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Speaker 1: here care more about hating women than they do about

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Speaker 1: stopping abuse.

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Speaker 2: Let's get into.

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Speaker 3: Well we get tequila before we start this.

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Speaker 2: Not tequila.

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Speaker 1: I ain't brought no tequila to do a episode like this.

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Speaker 3: We're not drinking.

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Speaker 2: You know what. I probably should have bought a little

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Speaker 2: bottle for this.

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Speaker 3: We should have. You know, I don't been liking to

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Speaker 3: drink on a microphone. But my god, my god, that

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Speaker 3: intr alone. Let's walk out. Let's walk out and walk

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Speaker 3: out and come back again.

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Speaker 2: WUSA.

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Speaker 1: I hope I did not trigger anybody y'all, welcome to

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Speaker 1: another episode of Selective Ignorance.

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Speaker 3: I'm your host, Mandy B.

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Speaker 2: And this one will be an episode for the ladies.

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Speaker 1: So as always, I am joined by my super producers,

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Speaker 1: Jason and A King.

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Speaker 3: Who may chime in.

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Speaker 1: But this is women holding women accountable. Here, baby, this

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Speaker 1: is a conversation between two vaginas.

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Speaker 3: All right, and you gottaell anybody what I got. I

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Speaker 3: thought you were progressive. We don't talk about what parts

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Speaker 3: we have.

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Speaker 2: I mean, we're not gonna get there.

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Speaker 1: You see how you wanna samp me so bad. We're

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Speaker 1: not gonna do that, y'all. I am joined by my

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Speaker 1: good friend and let me read down her accolades before

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Speaker 1: I talk about how. I don't know how the fuck

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Speaker 1: we got here. But today's guest is Carlovo Maris. She

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Speaker 1: is an award winning podcast producer, strategist, and the forest

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Speaker 1: behind Idea to Launch Productions, the company that has helped

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Speaker 1: launch over nine hundred podcasts and sixty million listens in

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Speaker 1: Canton Beach. She's also one half of the podcast So

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Speaker 1: What Now. She is a mother, she is my friend,

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Speaker 1: and we have massion tattoos.

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Speaker 3: We are both from Orlando, Florida, chop A City, Fall seven,

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Speaker 3: Chapa City, Brah Brah Braye, And this conversation comes off

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Speaker 3: of the heels of a lot of current events that

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Speaker 3: have been happening lately. So we are gonna dive into

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Speaker 3: the DDG and Hallie Bailey relationship. We are gonna dig

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Speaker 3: into Stefan Diggs and Cardi B's new budding relationship, also

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Speaker 3: sky Jackson. Also sky Jackson, I'm sorry. And then we

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Speaker 3: also may throw in a little bit of what we're

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Speaker 3: seeing in the trial with Diddy and all of the

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Speaker 3: people coming forward about that relationship. I'm sure there's way

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Speaker 3: more that will end up fucking climbing into. But what

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Speaker 3: I really love about this episode is where we talk

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Speaker 3: about the social discourse and people's outside views.

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Speaker 2: On so many things.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna storytelling kind of hold ourselves about accountable, hold

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Speaker 1: each other accountable, not even hold each other accountable as

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Speaker 1: much as just question right. I think so many times

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Speaker 1: when we're on Twitter, or we watching movies, or we

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Speaker 1: see somebody in a situation. It could be a family member,

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Speaker 1: a friend, we could just be like, now, girl, if

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Speaker 1: I was in that situation, this is what I would

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Speaker 1: have did, and I think that that's where we lack

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Speaker 1: sometimes the empathy for what a person is really going

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Speaker 1: through in their decision making for finding love, because you know,

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Speaker 1: if we really are talking about it, there's still this

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Speaker 1: idea that the Disney fairy tale ending is a thing.

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Speaker 1: I think there is still I think for women, more

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Speaker 1: than anything, the urge to find a soulmate, a love,

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Speaker 1: a partner. I think that's more a human You think

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Speaker 1: men equally are out there searching for the one like

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Speaker 1: like women.

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Speaker 3: They wouldn't be paying for apps or for matchmakers or

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Speaker 3: going out on day.

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Speaker 2: First off, it's because they want pussy. I think I

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Speaker 2: think a man wants pussy more than love.

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Speaker 3: I think we're generalizing men.

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Speaker 2: I mean in general.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I don't want you know what I would say, majority.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna say majority.

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Speaker 3: You go ahead, because you're ignorant sometimes like to be.

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Speaker 1: Okay, real quick, actually, because we do have our super

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Speaker 1: produces here, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on,

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Speaker 1: only because we have men in the house.

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Speaker 3: And I'm generalizing.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if Jason said nobody but a king

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Speaker 1: would you find with even your friends, your peers, your ecosystem. Jason,

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Speaker 1: you also literally were producers for for nas Mellow Merrow

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Speaker 1: you super producer. You were on Goddamn Combat Jack Show

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Speaker 1: with a lot of men. Do you believe that men

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Speaker 1: are out here seeking love to the same degree as

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Speaker 1: women or do you genuinely believe that pussy is wayed

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Speaker 1: a higher scale than love for men?

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Speaker 3: I just said this yesterday.

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Speaker 4: I think men want pussy for their dick, and I

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Speaker 4: think they want women on their arms so they could

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Speaker 4: flex for themselves.

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Speaker 3: Does that include you? I'm the dee. I higher he's

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Speaker 3: very married or not, you're still married or not, You're

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Speaker 3: still a man. Do you believe that how did you

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Speaker 3: find your womanhere? You're looking for pussy where you're looking

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Speaker 3: for love where you were arm candy? Is that what

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Speaker 3: your wife is to you?

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Speaker 4: My wife is not arm candy. I think for me

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Speaker 4: it's different because I'm also married a most ten years now,

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Speaker 4: So you change along the way. No, well, trying to answer,

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Speaker 4: but I think I think at the beginning, you're I

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Speaker 4: think at the beginning, men don't pursue love. I think

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Speaker 4: at the beginning, men are pursuing fun things to make

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Speaker 4: them feel better, whether that's sex or whatever. And then

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Speaker 4: you start realizing things that you are in and you

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Speaker 4: don't know that that's what you were pursuing initially, and

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Speaker 4: then you your your feelings start changing and then you

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Speaker 4: kind of open your eyes and stuff. I don't think

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Speaker 4: men go into it and they say, like, just what,

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Speaker 4: I don't I don't think the majority of I don't think.

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Speaker 3: The majority of men. A man like you start as

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Speaker 3: a young boy and then you develop into as a man,

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Speaker 3: and as a man you grew and realize that you

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Speaker 3: want to love him. Yes, it's not only that though.

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Speaker 1: If we if we even talk about how men are

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Speaker 1: are raised by other men and even the women in

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Speaker 1: their lives, they're not They're not fed the fairy tale

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Speaker 1: dreams or the Disney Channel outcomes right.

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Speaker 2: They're fed to go get pussy, go be a man.

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Speaker 1: The more pussy you get, the more that makes you mainly,

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Speaker 1: the more it makes you masculine.

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Speaker 3: Question world. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: On the contrary, the women in my family was total.

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Speaker 5: They was telling they would tell us, be careful when

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Speaker 5: you go to school, you know, be careful, pregnancy, be careful,

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Speaker 5: s t all those things, be careful, be careful, be careful.

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Speaker 6: I mean.

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Speaker 5: It didn't alter to pursue as as but wait, there's

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Speaker 5: levels to.

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Speaker 3: This, ia, Jordy, hold on, hold on, wait, wait, wait,

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Speaker 3: remember said I did say college though I'm talking about

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Speaker 3: I'm particularly I'm speaking on levels of age, you know,

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Speaker 3: mature maturation.

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Speaker 5: So eighteen year old to twenty twenty one, that's not

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Speaker 5: the same as a thirty year old in your mindset,

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Speaker 5: you can't go.

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Speaker 3: Up to forty five. These niggas are thirty, still chasing pussy.

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Speaker 3: The problem is there's no.

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Speaker 5: We need a whole reset in reimagining of what how

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Speaker 5: we deal with each other, women and men.

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Speaker 3: Man I agreement.

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Speaker 5: I think even to hold to the ideals of our elders,

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Speaker 5: there's things that got lost because they passed out, passed away,

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Speaker 5: tod and articulate these things, and we just need to

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Speaker 5: just reset this whole shit because we we're having these

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Speaker 5: bad experiences we shouldn't. I want love for you, I

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Speaker 5: want love for Carla, for Jason, and this example. We

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Speaker 5: don't have enough examples.

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Speaker 1: I think what's crazy too is our views on relationships right,

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Speaker 1: and the dynamics between men and women in intimate relationships

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Speaker 1: looks and feels completely different than the relationships that you

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Speaker 1: have with your friends. And so for me, I've been battling,

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Speaker 1: essentially with the feeling that no one fulfills me.

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Speaker 2: Like my friends do.

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Speaker 1: And it sucks because I'm like damn is and I'm

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Speaker 1: not holding men to those expectations as well. But for

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Speaker 1: me and the men in my ecosystem that I speak

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Speaker 1: to and such, when I talk about the relationships or

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Speaker 1: what they want from women, it's not that they're looking

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Speaker 1: for the love like when I talk to my homegirls.

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Speaker 1: What they want from men is a whole lot deeper

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Speaker 1: than when I talk to men. It's just like I

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Speaker 1: want pussy.

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Speaker 3: We're two different creatures. I think what makes it very

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Speaker 3: dangerous here is saying or generalizing men just because there

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Speaker 3: are great men out there and they are really shitty

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Speaker 3: men out there, just like there are shitty women.

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Speaker 1: You know what's unfair about what you just said, though,

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Speaker 1: I didn't say that you were a bad man for

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Speaker 1: leading with wanting pussy, and I think that that's a.

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Speaker 3: Well, no, no, I'm not saying just the pussy.

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Speaker 2: But the generalizing isn't a bad thing.

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Speaker 1: Like if you go into I think men will fall

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Speaker 1: into pussy and then grow feelings.

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Speaker 3: Well, sex is a natural human urge, right, Yeah, So

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Speaker 3: just having that urge at first is like maybe what

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Speaker 3: you're looking for. But I don't want to discount the

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Speaker 3: fact that men also want love and women as well.

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Speaker 3: Do we look for love, yes, do we also have

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Speaker 3: physical urges, yes, some lean more towards the other one,

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Speaker 3: But I don't want to discount that they also don't

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Speaker 3: want to find love. Sometimes in our generation, it just

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Speaker 3: feels like that's what we see all the time the Instagram,

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Speaker 3: the models. There's ass, there's titties, there's born, there's all

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Speaker 3: these things going on. There's only fans now so available

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Speaker 3: to you. So what you're constantly thinking about it's sex

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Speaker 3: unless there are men out there that they're into something else, right,

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Speaker 3: and then that's not their primary a sexual ones the

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Speaker 3: way they don't want pussy at all.

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Speaker 1: But but that pursuit is that I guess.

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Speaker 2: I guess.

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Speaker 1: How I like to normally start off the episodes is

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Speaker 1: a response to the introduction of what the topic is

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Speaker 1: and your face. First off, your chuckle. They heard your

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Speaker 1: voice on the mic before I introduced you. But the

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Speaker 1: introduction kind of led to what my stance will be

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Speaker 1: in this conversation in asking if there is room to

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Speaker 1: have both to empathize while also understanding what responsibility does

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Speaker 1: a woman have in selecting her partner. And we'll both

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Speaker 1: share our dating histories and things like that, but what

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Speaker 1: was your immediate like thought of always.

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Speaker 3: Room for conversation, there's always room for understanding, there's always

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Speaker 3: room to grow and what you already believe in, what

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Speaker 3: your experiences have been, right, But should we hold each

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Speaker 3: other accountable? Yes, but I think there's there was a

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Speaker 3: little there also a nuance, not nuisance, I'm not from

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Speaker 3: this country, we're.

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Speaker 2: Voting from Florida.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to the Florida public education system. Nuance. There's also

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Speaker 3: I forgot I was gonna say, there's there's nuance to

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Speaker 3: holding a woman accountable for her sessions and also the

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Speaker 3: men that we date, knowing that sometimes you're not coming

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Speaker 3: in just like you said with the wearing red flags

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Speaker 3: and walking right into them. There is also a part

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Speaker 3: of that's not so black and white. Essentially, it's not

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Speaker 3: black and white like every situation. I like the gray

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Speaker 3: area because every situation is so different. Although sometimes you

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Speaker 3: hear it and you're like, oh my god, I get

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Speaker 3: triggered the words that people say. I'm like, you say

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Speaker 3: the same thing you move the same way, damn you're

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Speaker 3: dressed the same way, like you do the same things.

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Speaker 3: But at the same time, there's something about you and

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Speaker 3: that person that they were able to manipulate. Right, whether

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Speaker 3: it's coming from a man or a female, we're specifically

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Speaker 3: talking about men in this episode, and there's things that

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Speaker 3: these manipulators know how to manipulate, and there's something sometimes

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Speaker 3: is missing within us that we're yearning for that they're

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Speaker 3: able to pinpoint and attack us from that side.

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Speaker 1: So, to be fair, what you just express to me

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Speaker 1: leans into why I said what I said. Even if

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Speaker 1: a man may want love at first, the idea that

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Speaker 1: a lot of men, even in dating and the pursuit

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Speaker 1: to have sex, that manipulation that only takes place prior

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Speaker 1: to the relationship. A man will show up in ways

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Speaker 1: to get just the box.

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Speaker 3: Manipulating is different though you think I think men have.

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Speaker 2: Of course, a man showing up as his representative.

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Speaker 3: Everyone has a representative when they firs show up. You

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Speaker 3: don't think that manipulation. No, Okay, manipulation comes with time,

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Speaker 3: right when they start mirroring you. When they do that,

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Speaker 3: they see what you like and they go there and

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Speaker 3: start supporting what you like, and it's a it's a

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Speaker 3: very small, gradual thing that happens, just a man coming

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Speaker 3: in and buying you dinner and being nice, and then

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Speaker 3: you know, taking it to Disney World and then a

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Speaker 3: couple of days later and you know, trying to get

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Speaker 3: touchy and trying that's not necessarily manipulation. He's just courting

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Speaker 3: you and he's trying to get some pussy or whatever.

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Speaker 3: Manipulation is a very slow slowing thing that leads to abusing.

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Speaker 3: You don't realize you're in it until you're in it.

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Speaker 3: And I think that's part of what we're gonna see

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Speaker 3: here when we're talking about versus just a man trying

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Speaker 3: to get something and getting turned down eventually after a

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Speaker 3: couple of dates.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well, I.

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Speaker 1: Wanted to lean into the current events to have his

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Speaker 1: dissect this before witch, I jump on your ass. And so,

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Speaker 1: like the people that I mentioned earlier, I want to

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Speaker 1: start with let's start with the two sky Jackson and

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Speaker 1: her baby daddy. She recently just filed a restraining order

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Speaker 1: against her son's father. His name is DeAndre Virgin and

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Speaker 1: this is after she claims physical abuse. Twirky Turky or

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Speaker 1: tweaky tweaky. He has a nickname on the internet. Mind

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Speaker 1: you a little backstory. Sky Jackson Disney star found this

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Speaker 1: man while he was incarcerated. I did look it up,

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Speaker 1: and this is why it's important for you to do

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Speaker 1: your own research. There were a lot of tweets insinuating

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Speaker 1: that he was imprisoned for domestic violence or violence against

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Speaker 1: previous partners. That is not the case. It was a

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Speaker 1: gun possession and attempted robbery.

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Speaker 2: I need, We're not gonna do the hierarchy of crimes.

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Speaker 1: But basically, she found this man while he was in jail,

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Speaker 1: and they got into a relationship. A year later, had

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Speaker 1: a baby, and now she is requesting the restraining order.

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Speaker 1: In parallel to that, we have Halle Bailey and DDG.

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Speaker 1: Halle Bailey is a little mermaid and then DDG is

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Speaker 1: a streamer and rapper. And basically we see that she

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Speaker 1: was just granted her restraining order where DDG has to

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Speaker 1: say temporary restraining order where DDG has been ordered to

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Speaker 1: stay at least one hundred yards away from Halle Bailey,

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Speaker 1: and she is allowed to take the baby over to

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Speaker 1: Italy while she films her next movie. Now why I

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Speaker 1: want to draw the parallels between both of these relationships

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Speaker 1: is because if we're talking about the Red Flax, we

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Speaker 1: have Sky Jackson who chose to meet her partner who

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Speaker 1: was in jail when they met.

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Speaker 3: I can look it up.

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Speaker 1: Because baby, I'm gonna be screened man and doing everything

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Speaker 1: all at once, because we're gonna be ignorant, but we

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Speaker 1: go at least try to be a little bit on

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Speaker 1: par with the facts. She was born in two thousand

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Speaker 1: and two, so she is twenty three years old. She

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Speaker 1: is twenty three years old. In comparison, we know that

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Speaker 1: Hallie Bailey and DDG are also under the age of thirty.

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Speaker 1: Why I'm drawing this parallel is because you have Sky

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Speaker 1: Jackson who chose to be in a relationship with someone

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Speaker 1: who was in prison, and we'll talk about our views

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Speaker 1: on incarcerated men and forgiving them and all those things.

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Speaker 1: But on the other side, we have Halle Bailey who

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Speaker 1: started dating DDG post his very public relationship with rapper

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Speaker 1: Ruby Rose. Now Ruby Rose, she is a rapper, also

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Speaker 1: has the only fans, but she's a rapper, really good

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Speaker 1: raps too. So Ruby Rose, in her exit of the relationship,

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Speaker 1: pretty much let everybody know that she.

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Speaker 3: Was getting physically abused by DDG.

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Speaker 2: This was public. This was public.

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Speaker 1: She also claims that he manipulated her into creating the

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Speaker 1: Only Fans as if that was her way and means

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Speaker 1: of making money, possibly not being in support of her

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Speaker 1: rap career. So she came out and said these things, right,

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Speaker 1: she came out and said these things, and nonetheless Sky

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Speaker 1: ignored the red flag of the man in jail. Hallie

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Speaker 1: Bailey ignored the red flag of this other woman saying

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Speaker 1: that she was physically abused by DDG. I want to know,

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Speaker 1: and I'll share my lack of empathy here because I'm

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Speaker 1: selectively ignorant. In no way do I empathize with a

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Speaker 1: woman who seeks an imprisoned man for a love connection,

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Speaker 1: because I do believe you have to lean into why

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Speaker 1: you're doing that, and it's because you're controlling, You're insecure,

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Speaker 1: You're you want this to be where you can control it.

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Speaker 1: So kind of not empathizing there, I know, y'all, go

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Speaker 1: y'all out.

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Speaker 3: I know.

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Speaker 1: And then in terms of Halle Bailey, which we'll get

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Speaker 1: into later too, if I'm online or if I'm dating

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Speaker 1: and there is any any and we've seen it on

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Speaker 1: Twitter for the for for years where people have been

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Speaker 1: outed as abusers, sexual abusers, physical abusers. I'm not dating

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Speaker 1: someone with those accusations, at least without hearing the other

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Speaker 1: person's side of the story and the fact that it

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Speaker 1: was kind of just dismissed. Mind you, how Bailey also

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Speaker 1: dismissed Ruby when she came out in the middle of

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Speaker 1: their relationship to say, your nigga's still in my DMS.

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Speaker 1: Hallie decided to say, hey, I'm not going to listen

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Speaker 1: to any information from a third party.

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Speaker 3: So I think I remember that.

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Speaker 1: So she was told that he's a cheater, was told

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Speaker 1: that he's a physical abuser, and she chose to still

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Speaker 1: get into that relationship and continued to say, I have

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Speaker 1: a lack of empathy for the decisions here, but I

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Speaker 1: want to know you, maybe from the other side, how

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Speaker 1: you can sympathize with the women who choose to get

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Speaker 1: into these relationships with I would say, not so law

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Speaker 1: abiding citizens.

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Speaker 3: To give some perspective on my opinion. I have a

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Speaker 3: twenty year old daughter, Okay, I've also been twenty You're

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Speaker 3: saying you don't empathize with these women. These are young women,

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Speaker 3: Okay that when all this started we're probably twenty one

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Speaker 3: years old, okay. So when you say here, I would

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Speaker 3: not be with a man in prison, you're thirty four,

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Speaker 3: I'm thirty eight, So you might and let's go. You

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Speaker 3: might not have went for a man in prison, but

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Speaker 3: I will say the both of us have gone for

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Speaker 3: some questionable people when we were twenty one, okay. So

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Speaker 3: I believe that life is an experiences. Without the experiences,

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Speaker 3: you don't get any better. Now we're asking for these

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Speaker 3: young ladies who have never experienced anything outside probably of

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Speaker 3: their homes, maybe a high school boyfriend. For Sky Jackson

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Speaker 3: especially be coming up as a Disney star who knows

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Speaker 3: all the things that she saw I didn't see, and

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Speaker 3: just wanted something fucking normal.

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Speaker 6: Normal jail, jail hold on normal is not jail, something

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Speaker 6: completely And I feel like as young women, sometimes you

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Speaker 6: rebel okay, And there's a part of rebellion when you're

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Speaker 6: young that you want to go for the bad boy.

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Speaker 3: You want to go for what makes you feel good,

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Speaker 3: for someone who's putting you up. And that's what I

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Speaker 3: kind of feel that we don't know these mother we don't,

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Speaker 3: we don't, we just judge it. I love it.

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Speaker 2: I love it.

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Speaker 3: Saying my favorite thing to do.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: This is why I love the freedom of speech, which

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Speaker 1: is why y'all are more than welcome to say, y'all

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Speaker 1: fucking can't see about.

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Speaker 3: Freedom of speech. But the consequences do cost, and they cost.

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Speaker 3: They gotta be careful with that part. But again you're like,

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Speaker 3: I don't have compassion for them, but I see my child,

440
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 3: I see me at twenty one, twenty two making these

441
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:28,960
Speaker 3: awful decisions, because you really don't realize the magnitude of

442
00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:31,760
Speaker 3: the consequences of what having a child is, what being

443
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:34,040
Speaker 3: with a man in jail is, what having someone trying

444
00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:36,240
Speaker 3: to make you to drink bleach, to have an abortion,

445
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:39,760
Speaker 3: what a man slamming your head into a steering wiell is.

446
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,640
Speaker 3: You've never seen that experience it like, it's like, oh

447
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,440
Speaker 3: my god, they're so young. So I think why I

448
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,120
Speaker 3: always say, there's a great area we got to take

449
00:22:47,119 --> 00:22:50,000
Speaker 3: into consideration, the age of these women, the background of

450
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:52,560
Speaker 3: these women, the trauma of these women. What allowed you

451
00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 3: to be attracted to this type of person that also

452
00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:00,480
Speaker 3: clearly has gone through extremes amount of try in their

453
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,160
Speaker 3: lifetime in order to be able to treat a woman

454
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,240
Speaker 3: the way that dogs shouldn't even be treated.

455
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:07,119
Speaker 1: First off, patriarchy brings us all trauma. Let's start there.

456
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:09,760
Speaker 1: But I do want to ask you, then, if these

457
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 1: same women were thirty five, do you hold the same

458
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:17,960
Speaker 1: grace And y'all know I'm bringing grace into the goddamn

459
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 1: chat and I can't stand at home, man, I know

460
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:26,720
Speaker 1: grace is not amazing grace, So yes, you have this,

461
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:29,080
Speaker 1: You hold the same space thirty three when I got

462
00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:30,720
Speaker 1: got I was thirty three.

463
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:34,119
Speaker 3: That you know what I did, I wasn't doing because

464
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:36,840
Speaker 3: it's a life. Look at thirty let's say we live

465
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 3: till we're seventy, Maybe thirty ain't even half of our life,

466
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,720
Speaker 3: of our experiences of what we're gonna learn, like what

467
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:46,560
Speaker 3: I knew at thirty three or thirty two. At thirty eight,

468
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:49,160
Speaker 3: they're gonna get me now they could. I'm not and

469
00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 3: I still could get god, you know, because they're so smart,

470
00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:56,800
Speaker 3: not that you call them ben smart smart and I'm

471
00:23:56,880 --> 00:24:00,400
Speaker 3: not like these manipulating people. Like these people are really

472
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,000
Speaker 3: bad folks. They know how to more and be chameleons

473
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:04,680
Speaker 3: into your life and sometimes you don't notice. But that's

474
00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,600
Speaker 3: when slowing down needs to happen. So if you look

475
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:10,320
Speaker 3: at a lot of these abusive relationships, I feel like

476
00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 3: now I can see a pattern, which is how fast

477
00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:15,520
Speaker 3: they move. They move so fast we don't take the time,

478
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 3: but I do give, I give grace, I give. I

479
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,119
Speaker 3: don't want to be so rough into these young women

480
00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:26,960
Speaker 3: who just did not have the I know you're saying young.

481
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:30,360
Speaker 2: Okay, So then at what age is there an age to.

482
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 3: Where these niggas can stop being asshole?

483
00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:34,479
Speaker 2: Okay? Valid?

484
00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 3: Why I gotta have an age stat fucking putting your

485
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:39,399
Speaker 3: hands on me? And what do we stop that?

486
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:39,960
Speaker 2: At zero?

487
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:43,040
Speaker 1: It should never start? I know, well, that's not the

488
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:45,840
Speaker 1: life we live in. It it sounds that's why.

489
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 3: We don't ask what age? Is it okay for us

490
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 3: not to be there because it sounds nice, but you're

491
00:24:50,640 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 3: going to be cut up in something. That's what life is.

492
00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:53,280
Speaker 3: But humans.

493
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 1: I guess that that's where when you say the thing like, yes,

494
00:24:57,640 --> 00:24:59,840
Speaker 1: we can learn from our mistakes, right, And I think

495
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: for anyone listening to this at a young age, because

496
00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 1: if we do go back, but you got to learn

497
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 1: from it, well, And that's that's I guess the tough

498
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:12,040
Speaker 1: thing that I'm realizing, right, the individualism and how we

499
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 1: actually approach life keeps us from learning from other people's mistakes, right,

500
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:21,000
Speaker 1: and so where we have the aunties an older woman

501
00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:23,280
Speaker 1: being like, baby, that ain't a good one, you shouldn't

502
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:27,920
Speaker 1: date him. Unfortunately, You're right, nothing comes without us learning

503
00:25:27,960 --> 00:25:28,159
Speaker 1: from it.

504
00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:30,520
Speaker 3: You have to hit your head like a hard head

505
00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:32,920
Speaker 3: makes a soft ass.

506
00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:37,199
Speaker 1: So I love that you said that, because oh, I

507
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 1: love that you said that, because I've had the issue

508
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:47,280
Speaker 1: with the celebration, the celebration of Cardi B and Stefon Diggs.

509
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:51,800
Speaker 1: Now I know the ladies have gone onto the internet

510
00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 1: and been like, ooh, y'all some haters let her live

511
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:58,080
Speaker 1: our best life. Oh but she looks happy. Oh that's

512
00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 1: literally how it sounds to me. If you were saying

513
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 1: as grown women, as a mother, as someone who has

514
00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 1: went through a tumultuous relationship, an abusive relationship with a cheater,

515
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:15,600
Speaker 1: a manipulator, all these things are abused. Where do we

516
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:19,760
Speaker 1: quote unquote celebrate or hold accountable the woman who goes

517
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 1: after the same type. And I say that because this

518
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:26,200
Speaker 1: bitch Cardi B, and I love Bardi B. I say,

519
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 1: bitches and dearing you my bitch bitch is endearing. But

520
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:35,360
Speaker 1: Cardi B went from one manipulative, whole ass fashion ass

521
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:39,320
Speaker 1: nigga to the next manipulating, whole ass, cheating ass nigga.

522
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:43,280
Speaker 1: Cardi is you asking agency crazy?

523
00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:45,160
Speaker 3: Because it's a thing. It's a thing.

524
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:47,520
Speaker 1: Cardi B is thirty two years old as a mother

525
00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 1: of three recently.

526
00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:53,240
Speaker 3: Yes, so that means she got with Offset around twenty four.

527
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 1: They were together for seven years five and so let

528
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,680
Speaker 1: me share my t I'm not gonna give all of it,

529
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 1: but there are videos circulating online and this is where

530
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 1: I talk about the proof being out there for a

531
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,399
Speaker 1: woman to decide whether this makes sense or not.

532
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:15,800
Speaker 2: Right, So, there is a video of Sefon Diggs.

533
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:18,360
Speaker 3: Teammates.

534
00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,280
Speaker 1: They made a video TikTok where they went and asked

535
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:24,600
Speaker 1: every player on the team, which guy on the team

536
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:28,439
Speaker 1: would you not let your sister date. Everyone on the

537
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:33,160
Speaker 1: team said this man. Also, if you google an asshat GPT,

538
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 1: it says that Stefon Diggs is the father of one.

539
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 1: We most recently have been notified that he just recently

540
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:43,760
Speaker 1: had a baby with another girl. I believe she was

541
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 1: like a star tender or stripper or something like that,

542
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 1: but nowhere on the record allegedly he got a whole

543
00:27:51,359 --> 00:27:55,080
Speaker 1: lot of babies out here. Okay, hol on, hold on,

544
00:27:55,119 --> 00:28:00,040
Speaker 1: there's also another woman publicly portraying her current relationship with

545
00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:05,720
Speaker 1: him while he's outside. I'll show you I G model

546
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,399
Speaker 1: T is my page, girl, I begin all all the inside,

547
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:11,200
Speaker 1: they begin everybody's stories.

548
00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 3: Finding out girl.

549
00:28:16,359 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 1: Anyways, I say all of that to say, we've heard

550
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:26,320
Speaker 1: and seen CARTI cry, and we've empathized with her for

551
00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:30,480
Speaker 1: wanting this relationship with her ex husband Offset to work.

552
00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:34,360
Speaker 1: We saw the manipulation of him even proposing on stage.

553
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:38,120
Speaker 1: We saw the abuse in terms of the emotional abuse

554
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:40,240
Speaker 1: with all of the cheating that took place.

555
00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 3: There were no reports on physical.

556
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:47,560
Speaker 1: Abuse, but y'all, emotional abuse is one of the ones

557
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:48,760
Speaker 1: that we don't really talk about.

558
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 3: I remember HEARDing a podcast that it takes about five

559
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:54,000
Speaker 3: years to heal from the trauma of being cheated on.

560
00:28:54,320 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 3: So here's my question.

561
00:28:55,840 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: Then, with the way in which Offset hurt her, why

562
00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:09,000
Speaker 1: would we celebrate her essentially being paraded around with a

563
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:10,680
Speaker 1: man who has the same traits.

564
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 3: Okay, my time, Yeah, that was my question. I think

565
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:18,480
Speaker 3: it is finally beautiful to see her smiling, beautiful woman.

566
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:20,720
Speaker 3: It is a celebrity culture. We just see her smiling,

567
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:22,000
Speaker 3: we see her having a good time. We don't know

568
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:23,360
Speaker 3: what the fuck she's doing behind the scenes. She could

569
00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 3: be gett her as me by Steffan. We don't know,

570
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 3: but it's just well, they're also just having fun. It's

571
00:29:27,840 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 3: nice to see her smiling, to see her court side,

572
00:29:31,320 --> 00:29:33,800
Speaker 3: to be with her bat He's cute, you know, he's

573
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:39,520
Speaker 3: nice looking. Do I personally not knowing the girl at

574
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:41,360
Speaker 3: all or anything behind the scenes, we just do. I

575
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,120
Speaker 3: think she should be dating. At my big age of

576
00:29:43,160 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 3: thirty eight and having enough experience, I don't think she

577
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:49,040
Speaker 3: should be dating. There's so much work that you have

578
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:49,920
Speaker 3: to do on the back end.

579
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 2: What about sex too.

580
00:29:52,040 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 3: So I do understand though that sometimes people deal with

581
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:57,680
Speaker 3: the aftermath of a breakup in a very different way.

582
00:29:57,880 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 3: I don't know what wise counsel she has around her,

583
00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 3: but if right now she's just having a little fun,

584
00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:06,960
Speaker 3: which in my beliefs and my morals. For me, and

585
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,880
Speaker 3: I'm not a huge sexual person, casual sex is not

586
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,720
Speaker 3: my thing. It might be hers. She was young, twenty

587
00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:16,120
Speaker 3: some years old. I can't even relate to her world

588
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 3: because it don't look nothing like that.

589
00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:18,560
Speaker 2: Even before offset.

590
00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:24,480
Speaker 3: She was going to man in jail, jail, she.

591
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:27,440
Speaker 2: Was holding him down in jail.

592
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:31,480
Speaker 3: Absolutely, so she has CARDI comes from a past and

593
00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:34,520
Speaker 3: a world back then that looks very similar to where

594
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:35,360
Speaker 3: she's living right now.

595
00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:37,920
Speaker 2: Then she gets this fame and this money.

596
00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 3: That's something that's not not very many people can relate to.

597
00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 3: It's a very small percentage that can relate to where

598
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,760
Speaker 3: she's living. So right now, she just she's been locked

599
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 3: in with this nigga popping babies, figuring out how to

600
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 3: deal with this world. She's like, that's not.

601
00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 1: Some fun, you know, the saying, Now, you could lead

602
00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:55,800
Speaker 1: a horse to water, but you can't make it, do you?

603
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:56,160
Speaker 6: Then?

604
00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:02,400
Speaker 1: How do you empathize? And this is me Wait wait, wait, wait,

605
00:31:02,440 --> 00:31:06,080
Speaker 1: it's not it's not. I understand empathies, sympathy, all of

606
00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:07,040
Speaker 1: the things exists.

607
00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,880
Speaker 2: We're humans. We have it in certain capacities.

608
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:16,959
Speaker 1: How do you physically feel or care or want someone

609
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:20,600
Speaker 1: to do better then that wants better for themselves.

610
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:22,480
Speaker 3: There's nothing inside of me that I could ever look

611
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:25,320
Speaker 3: at a person, perhaps inside of my baby daddy, that

612
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:28,080
Speaker 3: I could think I wish something bad on you, you

613
00:31:28,080 --> 00:31:30,680
Speaker 3: know what I mean? And not even him. I don't

614
00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 3: want to ever see any human being going through something

615
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 3: or if you're going to something saying ha, you deserve that, right.

616
00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 3: I mean maybe like a pedophile or something like that

617
00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:41,320
Speaker 3: that really hurts someone, you know what I mean, go

618
00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:43,000
Speaker 3: under the jail, cut the nails all.

619
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:44,080
Speaker 5: But for me.

620
00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:45,720
Speaker 3: But for me, those are two different things.

621
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 1: What I'm saying is if a woman, if a woman

622
00:31:48,480 --> 00:31:51,880
Speaker 1: doesn't think she deserves better, if a woman continues to

623
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:55,520
Speaker 1: go after Holland these same types and isn't seeking therapy,

624
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 1: isn't growing, isn't learning from her mistakes? Get take us

625
00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:01,880
Speaker 1: out the fucking group? You know how you get yourself

626
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 1: out of the group?

627
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:05,080
Speaker 3: Chat, you shoot your phone off, You're out the group.

628
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:07,960
Speaker 3: Check live in the world when there's media, if it's

629
00:32:08,000 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 3: bothering you, and if you feel like you people say

630
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 3: that it ain't bothering me.

631
00:32:12,680 --> 00:32:13,640
Speaker 2: I'm not that invested.

632
00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:16,120
Speaker 3: I'm talking of the general we're talking about what we're

633
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 3: People are upset. I'm not saying necessarily you're not losing sleepy,

634
00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:21,000
Speaker 3: We're working. This is what this is what this is

635
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,520
Speaker 3: what we do, and this is what the media does.

636
00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:25,480
Speaker 3: And why it's so important for you to have your

637
00:32:25,480 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 3: point that's what you're saying and what you're seeing your house.

638
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 3: Sometimes you're like, I don't really got sympathy and why

639
00:32:28,760 --> 00:32:30,520
Speaker 3: I have a voice to say, you know what? But

640
00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 3: sometimes you just have to give people grace and let

641
00:32:33,360 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 3: them learn take their journey. That some people's journey are

642
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:37,800
Speaker 3: just longer than the other ones. I'm trying to tell

643
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:40,360
Speaker 3: my daughter a business decision right she's seeing her mother,

644
00:32:40,360 --> 00:32:44,200
Speaker 3: who's been extremely successful in business, my father a bit,

645
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:46,840
Speaker 3: and I'm like, don't do that, don't do that, don't

646
00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 3: do that. Boom, she does it. Don't go this way,

647
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,000
Speaker 3: don't go this way. I'm telling her step by step

648
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,480
Speaker 3: what's gonna happen, and she just runs right into that wall.

649
00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 3: And then it's like, okay, it has to be redirected

650
00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 3: and they're going to hit their heads. We don't learn

651
00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 3: from other people's mistakes. Now, woman like Cardi, I just

652
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,760
Speaker 3: see her. I'm like, look, if you're having fun, cool.

653
00:33:03,920 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 3: I don't think sharing energies with other people all the

654
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:08,360
Speaker 3: time is making you feel any better. And I've told

655
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:10,640
Speaker 3: you this is how I live. I just don't think

656
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:12,320
Speaker 3: having casual sex is going I.

657
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:15,640
Speaker 1: Don't have casual sex anymore. It's unfulfilling. I feel empty

658
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:17,600
Speaker 1: and indeed into the seal.

659
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:19,400
Speaker 3: Okay, first of.

660
00:33:22,680 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 7: Everybody, shut talk about maturation. Hold on, stay here man,

661
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 7: you say this and twenty you know on Marvel when

662
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:37,880
Speaker 7: you when you fuck up the timeline.

663
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:41,840
Speaker 2: We're not going to do that because let's be very clear.

664
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:43,520
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm not saying no, it's beautiful.

665
00:33:43,520 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 2: I just I just I'm proud of you.

666
00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 5: Thanks all right, and you too, You're not saying I'm

667
00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:51,040
Speaker 5: just proud this part of the I love it.

668
00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:55,400
Speaker 1: No, I guess, I guess that's my that's my thing, right,

669
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:57,600
Speaker 1: Like when we're let's just.

670
00:33:57,560 --> 00:34:00,000
Speaker 3: Give people, I just think, honestly, it's a great bitch.

671
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:03,120
Speaker 3: It's just giving people grades. Just really let them do

672
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:08,359
Speaker 3: their thing. If it's not affecting you, like personally, let

673
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 3: it go. Because even watching Carti's Journey, watching Hallie's Bailey,

674
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:14,320
Speaker 3: there's still Hallie's.

675
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:20,800
Speaker 1: Baby, Carla Cooking, Carla Cooking is the new podcast, Carla's Cooking.

676
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 3: No seriously, watching all of them, watching your auntie, your mama.

677
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 3: You could be at the home watching your mom g

678
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:33,600
Speaker 3: asby and you'll still make the same mistake. Why because

679
00:34:33,600 --> 00:34:35,400
Speaker 3: we have to release it down. But it's really hard

680
00:34:35,560 --> 00:34:38,720
Speaker 3: to go through the fire of getting better, going through therapy.

681
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:41,600
Speaker 3: When I left my the monster I was with. You know,

682
00:34:41,640 --> 00:34:44,480
Speaker 3: I had to lean in four times a week to

683
00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:45,480
Speaker 3: go to therapy.

684
00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 2: I'm two years out and you still came up.

685
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:49,799
Speaker 3: Shut up.

686
00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 2: It takes away.

687
00:34:53,200 --> 00:34:56,279
Speaker 3: It should be a forever thing, because you have to

688
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:58,640
Speaker 3: forever know that you're being triggered by certain things, because

689
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:01,319
Speaker 3: it's not just them. They were able to tap into

690
00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:03,960
Speaker 3: something within you that you were already lacking from before.

691
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 3: So we put so much blame on this manipulator. But

692
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:09,279
Speaker 3: I know for a fact that I was missing things

693
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 3: from my mother. I know that I was just hard headed.

694
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,319
Speaker 3: I know that I wanted certain things that I wanted

695
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:15,480
Speaker 3: to be mine, mind, mine, and for my own belief.

696
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:18,240
Speaker 3: I wanted to follow my plan versus God's plan. Not Drakes,

697
00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:21,080
Speaker 3: but literally God's plan for me in my path, my journey.

698
00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:22,279
Speaker 3: And I'm just like, now, I'm gonna do it my own.

699
00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:23,520
Speaker 3: I can do it my way back. I was leaning

700
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:24,120
Speaker 3: onto my own.

701
00:35:24,040 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 1: Eyes, and I guess, I guess then that is my problem.

702
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:32,160
Speaker 1: When I talk about accountability, we the ones with the mics,

703
00:35:32,440 --> 00:35:37,600
Speaker 1: the ones coming forward discussing the abuse, sharing their experience

704
00:35:37,680 --> 00:35:38,280
Speaker 1: with these.

705
00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 2: Quote unquote monsters.

706
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:44,800
Speaker 1: We don't hear a woman sharing the how she enabled

707
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:46,960
Speaker 1: this to happen and she needs to work on And

708
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:47,440
Speaker 1: so I.

709
00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:50,280
Speaker 3: Guess that's what opens up the conversation to like, yeah, okay,

710
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,759
Speaker 3: yes they're a bad person, Yes they did this to me,

711
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:57,200
Speaker 3: But what happened to me to allow that? Why was

712
00:35:57,280 --> 00:36:00,359
Speaker 3: I yearning that kind of love? Why was why did

713
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 3: this man throw me a couple of scriptures and I

714
00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:06,400
Speaker 3: fell for it? Like why did I see there is

715
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,480
Speaker 3: such a thing about religion manipulation and abuse like that

716
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:11,759
Speaker 3: really does happen, And it's like you want to be

717
00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:14,440
Speaker 3: and and I know for myself for a fact that

718
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:16,200
Speaker 3: I can say if there's I know there are a

719
00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:17,279
Speaker 3: lot of women that are saying, you know what, I

720
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:18,920
Speaker 3: want a god fairy man. I want a man that's

721
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:21,880
Speaker 3: into the church. But if you are just listening to

722
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:23,440
Speaker 3: him talk to you about church, and you're not in

723
00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 3: that Bible reading yourself, not what justin the Boy is posting,

724
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 3: not what spiritual world is posting, not what Megan Ashley

725
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:37,240
Speaker 3: is posed Simona saying on these Christian podcasts, No, you

726
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 3: get your ass into that Bible and see what the

727
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:41,160
Speaker 3: Lord is talking about to you, and then you'll be

728
00:36:41,200 --> 00:36:43,600
Speaker 3: able to see that monster clearly and thoroughly because he's

729
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:45,319
Speaker 3: not really talking to you about what's really in that book.

730
00:36:45,400 --> 00:36:48,520
Speaker 3: I guess that's the thing with same thing with therapy.

731
00:36:48,680 --> 00:36:51,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's where I sit in again, there's a

732
00:36:51,760 --> 00:36:54,840
Speaker 1: thing to vocalize and do the work either through therapy.

733
00:36:55,200 --> 00:36:57,920
Speaker 1: There's a way to if you're going to bash a

734
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:02,279
Speaker 1: man publicly, to address your own polite And so when

735
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:05,879
Speaker 1: we talk about this dynamic between men and women which

736
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 1: we hate, we're calling it gender wars, and we're seeing

737
00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 1: it on the podcast mics, we're seeing it on Twitter.

738
00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:13,239
Speaker 1: We're seeing it with the Diddy trial where people won't

739
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 1: even allow Cassie to be a victim, right.

740
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,319
Speaker 2: I think my frustration is the.

741
00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:25,680
Speaker 1: Silence of women speaking forward in how they could show

742
00:37:25,719 --> 00:37:26,400
Speaker 1: it better.

743
00:37:26,719 --> 00:37:28,200
Speaker 3: Where their faults lied.

744
00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 1: And again, this isn't too victim blame or say that

745
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:33,480
Speaker 1: you can't be a victim in all of this because

746
00:37:33,480 --> 00:37:36,759
Speaker 1: of all the things at the hands of abuse. However,

747
00:37:38,360 --> 00:37:41,840
Speaker 1: it becomes a little bit frustrating for me as a

748
00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:44,480
Speaker 1: woman who does do the work to have friends that

749
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:50,200
Speaker 1: do the work to see women continuously only ostracize men

750
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:54,160
Speaker 1: their behavior and not leaning into how we can keep

751
00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:58,160
Speaker 1: ourselves out of these situations. I think I see when

752
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 1: I see the sky Jackson's and the Hollies. I think

753
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:04,480
Speaker 1: one of the biggest problems for me is we talk

754
00:38:04,560 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 1: about listening to women right, and I guess it becomes frustrating,

755
00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 1: specifically from a Halle Bailey standpoint or even Cardi where

756
00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:15,720
Speaker 1: people are warning her about Steph. I think it becomes

757
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:18,600
Speaker 1: frustrating when we as women don't even listen to other women.

758
00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:21,200
Speaker 3: Okay, let me's happening before I lose the train of thought. Yes,

759
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:24,000
Speaker 3: we are talking. We are on the mics telling you

760
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 3: what we're doing. It's just not loud. It doesn't go viral,

761
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:30,840
Speaker 3: it's not dope. You know who actually hears those the

762
00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,040
Speaker 3: women that are now going through something I have been

763
00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:35,000
Speaker 3: talking about for years, the work that I've done. And

764
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 3: I don't have a huge platform. I don't I mean

765
00:38:36,719 --> 00:38:38,799
Speaker 3: compared to like the Cardis and that I don't have

766
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:42,439
Speaker 3: this huge bandies and the man. You're loud, loud, big,

767
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:46,399
Speaker 3: like people hear you and you're ignorant selectively. But I've

768
00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:49,080
Speaker 3: talked about it for years. But you know what got

769
00:38:49,320 --> 00:38:52,560
Speaker 3: tens of millions of things that go viral. Me going

770
00:38:52,600 --> 00:38:54,360
Speaker 3: off on TK about something right and the way that

771
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:57,279
Speaker 3: it was edited on purpose shout out to me know

772
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:00,359
Speaker 3: on marketing right, But that's what goes Viral's of people

773
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:03,320
Speaker 3: here loudly. We are talking about it, we are saying

774
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:06,680
Speaker 3: what we're doing to fix things. It's just not cool.

775
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:11,080
Speaker 3: It's not like it doesn't create as much conversation. It's

776
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:13,840
Speaker 3: just not what's the word I'm looking for. It's not salacious.

777
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:16,600
Speaker 3: It's not like I doesn't bring all these eyes. But

778
00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:20,720
Speaker 3: women are talking about it. I swear that I are here.

779
00:39:20,360 --> 00:39:23,879
Speaker 2: So you believe as women then, which maybe I can't say.

780
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:24,200
Speaker 3: I know.

781
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:29,400
Speaker 1: I have absolutely empathized more with women who have stayed

782
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:32,640
Speaker 1: too long, especially because I went back to my ex

783
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:33,440
Speaker 1: thirteen times.

784
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 3: And keep in mind, you have money, you had your

785
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:44,839
Speaker 3: own house, you had your own everything. Most but yeah,

786
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 3: there are so many women, especially in this economy right now,

787
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:50,279
Speaker 3: who have kids that we can't afford. On't try to

788
00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:52,320
Speaker 3: get as fire what we're gonna do with that kids.

789
00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:54,400
Speaker 3: They don't have a house, they don't have a car,

790
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:56,919
Speaker 3: like I'm literally watching right now a neighbor of mine,

791
00:39:56,960 --> 00:39:59,839
Speaker 3: like going through this and it's wild seeing it like

792
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:01,839
Speaker 3: front and center. I mean, I have a whole soap

793
00:40:01,840 --> 00:40:04,399
Speaker 3: opera happening here from my window in my office. While

794
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:05,680
Speaker 3: I love it. One day, I'm gonna do a story

795
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:08,520
Speaker 3: about it. But it's so hard to see. I had

796
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 3: a house, a car of business, money, people to fall

797
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 3: back on and stay longer than I should have.

798
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:15,359
Speaker 1: I would say the financial manipulation is absolutely and it's

799
00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:16,040
Speaker 1: just a strain.

800
00:40:16,120 --> 00:40:18,760
Speaker 3: I can't we can't leave. We have children, we're breasting,

801
00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:19,880
Speaker 3: we can't find a job.

802
00:40:20,160 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 1: I mean not only that, there's literally reports right now

803
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 1: coming out that more people are staying in these toxic,

804
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:30,040
Speaker 1: unhealthy relationships because they can't afford rent by themselves.

805
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 3: It just you go to a shelter, you're taking your

806
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:37,040
Speaker 3: three kids. These men literally impregnate women to hold them back.

807
00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:40,760
Speaker 2: Oh wait, is that women is doing the trip?

808
00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:42,200
Speaker 3: Absolutely?

809
00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:44,120
Speaker 2: Wait wait, wait to hold them back.

810
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:45,279
Speaker 3: To hold them You have to sit here now for

811
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:45,839
Speaker 3: a litt bit longer.

812
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:48,200
Speaker 2: Now, you I need you to lean into this.

813
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 1: Men are purposely impregnating women to hold the woman back.

814
00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:56,520
Speaker 3: Some men that are toxic, uh huh, that are manipulative.

815
00:40:56,719 --> 00:40:59,320
Speaker 3: But there is something to be able to put because

816
00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:01,360
Speaker 3: you know the man is the one you have the choice.

817
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:03,399
Speaker 3: As a woman, you're also having sex, yes, the woman.

818
00:41:03,440 --> 00:41:05,399
Speaker 3: You also maybe didn't get on birth control. As a woman,

819
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:07,279
Speaker 3: you're choosing this, but the man is telling you something different, right,

820
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:09,120
Speaker 3: so you're believing and you're loving it. This is sometime.

821
00:41:09,160 --> 00:41:10,920
Speaker 3: I'm not talking about a one night stand you got pregnant.

822
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:13,399
Speaker 3: I'm talking about you're in a relationship with someone and

823
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:16,919
Speaker 3: they meant consense, when things are happening, when you start

824
00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 3: having certain questions and like, I need a baby right away,

825
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:20,880
Speaker 3: I want a family, I want this once that baby

826
00:41:20,880 --> 00:41:23,400
Speaker 3: gets there. Now you're pregnant. Now you may have preclamcy

827
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:24,799
Speaker 3: and they may have high blood presure. You have to

828
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:26,319
Speaker 3: really take care of this child. And you have this baby,

829
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:29,239
Speaker 3: you're going through postpartum, you're bleeding out, your baby's breastfeeding.

830
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 3: You really try to get your body back together. You're

831
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:34,759
Speaker 3: a hormone a c section, you're healing. So can you leave? Yes?

832
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:36,800
Speaker 3: Doesn't make it harder, Yes, it will take you a

833
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:37,480
Speaker 3: little bit longer.

834
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:38,000
Speaker 4: Yes.

835
00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:39,880
Speaker 3: And then in the time that you they're pregnant and

836
00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:42,359
Speaker 3: the baby's first year, you're wrapped up even more into

837
00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:47,160
Speaker 3: this shit. Mentally, Jesus, that's what a baby. But I not,

838
00:41:47,400 --> 00:41:50,320
Speaker 3: and we're looking on all three who we're talking about.

839
00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:54,280
Speaker 1: I mean to me, I also want to generalize this

840
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,480
Speaker 1: conversation just a little bit more as well, because.

841
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:01,439
Speaker 3: If I'm drawing parallels here.

842
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 1: Right, because unfortunately y'all, if you haven't been able to

843
00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:05,840
Speaker 1: tell yet, I'm a lot more black and white.

844
00:42:06,280 --> 00:42:07,840
Speaker 2: So so where.

845
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:13,240
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm very biracial, by that, I am black and white.

846
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:17,279
Speaker 1: But the way that my mind works, right, so I

847
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 1: want to draw the comparison to many women and their

848
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:26,759
Speaker 1: thoughts and unalliances, say, with the election last year, right,

849
00:42:27,320 --> 00:42:29,399
Speaker 1: so there's a lot of black women that have done

850
00:42:29,440 --> 00:42:33,799
Speaker 1: a lot of work, and now if anything happens to

851
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 1: white women or even Latino women, there's like a black

852
00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:40,080
Speaker 1: woman throwing their hands in the air, like, y'all, we tried,

853
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:41,600
Speaker 1: this ain't our problem no more?

854
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:42,400
Speaker 3: And there is.

855
00:42:42,840 --> 00:42:46,960
Speaker 1: For me, that's kind of where I lean into a

856
00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:49,960
Speaker 1: woman who either went through an experience with a man,

857
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:53,319
Speaker 1: was told or warned about what would happen if this

858
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:56,400
Speaker 1: if this okay, let's do draw the parallel. If Trump

859
00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 1: gets into the office, this will happen if you date

860
00:42:59,040 --> 00:43:01,520
Speaker 1: this man with this type of try work, this will happened.

861
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 1: I guess that's why I'm throwing my hands in the

862
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:09,160
Speaker 1: air for giving a fuck and not feeling like, Okay,

863
00:43:09,239 --> 00:43:13,680
Speaker 1: yes the men are monsters, but also bitch and that's.

864
00:43:13,600 --> 00:43:17,200
Speaker 3: A character heart post. I know that's a heart fostraight thing.

865
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:18,560
Speaker 3: I feel like that's a human.

866
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:21,440
Speaker 1: Okay, heart at bitess.

867
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:27,719
Speaker 3: The skin is white, the heart is black. You're there

868
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:32,320
Speaker 3: is an aspect of you can be frustrating, it extremely frustrating.

869
00:43:32,360 --> 00:43:34,600
Speaker 3: I'm looking at the state of our country when we're

870
00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 3: talking about politics, and it's like, man, we tried. We

871
00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:39,480
Speaker 3: went in there as Republicans. I was talking about it later.

872
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:42,680
Speaker 3: I tried, I didn't want this, you know, this is

873
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:44,560
Speaker 3: not what I wanted this, and I was loud about it.

874
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:46,920
Speaker 3: You know we're loud. But it still happens because there's

875
00:43:46,920 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 3: so many people that have different ones and needs. But

876
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:52,400
Speaker 3: going back to women, why.

877
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:54,359
Speaker 2: Does then a woman think the thing?

878
00:43:54,880 --> 00:43:57,319
Speaker 1: Keep it here with the politics, Come on with your

879
00:43:57,400 --> 00:44:02,680
Speaker 1: Republican ass views, with the way Kamala and everybody was

880
00:44:02,719 --> 00:44:04,120
Speaker 1: like Project twenty twenty five.

881
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:06,160
Speaker 2: This is where we are headed if Trump.

882
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 1: Gets office, hold on, I want to ask, how with

883
00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 1: your Republican ass views. Why you're surprised where where we're

884
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:18,880
Speaker 1: at right now in comparison to a woman is being

885
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:23,480
Speaker 1: pursued by a man, there is a warning sign that says, warning,

886
00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:26,439
Speaker 1: if you get into a relationship with this man, this

887
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:29,200
Speaker 1: is the probability of this happening. What makes a woman

888
00:44:29,239 --> 00:44:31,040
Speaker 1: think that they're an exception to.

889
00:44:31,080 --> 00:44:32,759
Speaker 2: What a man has already showed him to?

890
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:35,759
Speaker 3: The politic one, let's get away the politics. Yes, we're

891
00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:38,920
Speaker 3: looking from the outside in right This woman is in it,

892
00:44:39,280 --> 00:44:41,160
Speaker 3: so we have a bird's eye view of what she's

893
00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:43,319
Speaker 3: going through. And yes, we can see around what's about

894
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:45,640
Speaker 3: to happen. She's in it. And let's not forget that

895
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 3: these men that we're specifically talking about have enablers all

896
00:44:49,680 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 3: around them. Okay, let's go back to my situation. Although no, no, no,

897
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 3: let's not get there yet.

898
00:44:54,040 --> 00:44:57,799
Speaker 1: Okay, I also don't want to put us in a

899
00:44:57,880 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 1: relationship yet.

900
00:44:59,080 --> 00:45:02,799
Speaker 2: So you're talking is the warning science, and you think you.

901
00:45:03,960 --> 00:45:08,400
Speaker 3: Start talking to them, you're dating? Everything most times moves

902
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:09,720
Speaker 3: really fast.

903
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:13,000
Speaker 1: There's not one said they need a date bitches for

904
00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:14,720
Speaker 1: a year to even make them their girlfriend.

905
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:16,000
Speaker 2: Where is shit moving fast?

906
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:19,520
Speaker 3: With people? These look at all of these scenarios, they

907
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:25,120
Speaker 3: all moved extremely fast. They kids really fast. Everything my situation,

908
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:27,040
Speaker 3: your situation moved really fast.

909
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:28,120
Speaker 2: Well it was the pandemic.

910
00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:31,680
Speaker 3: Regardless of what it was it was, It doesn't matter

911
00:45:31,719 --> 00:45:35,520
Speaker 3: what it was. They all moved. It was bread. You

912
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:38,399
Speaker 3: learn from zoom to in love in three point five

913
00:45:38,440 --> 00:45:41,160
Speaker 3: seconds twenty days, literally real quick. So let's just keep

914
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:42,799
Speaker 3: in mind that all of this is happening really fast.

915
00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:44,600
Speaker 3: So we have a bird's eye view. They're in here,

916
00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:47,680
Speaker 3: they're having neighbors around them, and my situation, specifically, your

917
00:45:47,680 --> 00:45:49,319
Speaker 3: cly has to many people around him that you might

918
00:45:49,320 --> 00:45:51,120
Speaker 3: have known. No, there's not much that you could have known.

919
00:45:51,160 --> 00:45:52,759
Speaker 3: They were red flags told you about him, and you're listen.

920
00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:57,839
Speaker 3: So going around it, my guy had a lot of

921
00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:01,279
Speaker 3: en neighbors or people that were telling me this different. Wow,

922
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:03,800
Speaker 3: look what he's doing. Oh, he's never done that before.

923
00:46:04,040 --> 00:46:06,200
Speaker 3: And when I think back to me, even in the

924
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:10,400
Speaker 3: even over, you said that about everybody, even in the

925
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:14,920
Speaker 3: over decades that we're friends. I was toxic, I was abusive,

926
00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:18,480
Speaker 3: I had really fucked up thoughts sometimes about certain things,

927
00:46:18,560 --> 00:46:20,800
Speaker 3: and I chose to do the work. So people do change.

928
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,759
Speaker 3: So when you're a person until the thirty eight to

929
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:27,719
Speaker 3: change word. Maybe pity you never know. But when you

930
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:29,800
Speaker 3: think about the fact that I was able to get better,

931
00:46:30,440 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 3: I'm doing better. Why can't they do better? Why are

932
00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:34,880
Speaker 3: we holding people to the bed? You want people to

933
00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:38,040
Speaker 3: still think you a ho, No, you got better, you

934
00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 3: did better? Whoa whoa Yes, it is because we have

935
00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:44,880
Speaker 3: to allow people grazing n for them to grow and

936
00:46:44,880 --> 00:46:47,600
Speaker 3: do better, because many people do. Many people do, but

937
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:53,839
Speaker 3: some of them pretend like they do. On a hope,

938
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:01,440
Speaker 3: I can't say, yeah, well, you're not an aggressive person.

939
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:03,400
Speaker 3: I woo some mass hold on, don't put that out.

940
00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:09,080
Speaker 3: We're talking about relationship. I do bring that I am.

941
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 3: I am very.

942
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:14,919
Speaker 1: Probably I've never laid hands on a man again person.

943
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:18,640
Speaker 1: As soon as the nigga raised his voice, you can be.

944
00:47:18,719 --> 00:47:19,760
Speaker 3: I'm talking about a negative.

945
00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:22,640
Speaker 1: People hear me on this mic and believe that I'm

946
00:47:22,640 --> 00:47:24,960
Speaker 1: an aggressor, and I really know because you.

947
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:27,840
Speaker 3: Are in a different way. You're very passive aggressive.

948
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 2: This is podcast.

949
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:37,480
Speaker 3: I'm not you're admitting one word. You are passive. I'm

950
00:47:37,560 --> 00:47:39,439
Speaker 3: just okay. Hold on again, a king?

951
00:47:39,560 --> 00:47:41,759
Speaker 2: Do you think hold on?

952
00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:44,600
Speaker 1: Because A king has been my friend and in my

953
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:48,399
Speaker 1: circle work wise and personal wise for for a lot

954
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:51,960
Speaker 1: of years, going on almost ten years a king, would

955
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:53,120
Speaker 1: you agree with this?

956
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:59,880
Speaker 3: Kings like I work here. I haven't processed it that way. Carlo.

957
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 5: I appreciate you, you know our relationship, but Carl is

958
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,840
Speaker 5: probably way more closer to you in terms of really

959
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:09,120
Speaker 5: the nitty gritty of things.

960
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 1: And three passively aggress I think pass aggress.

961
00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:15,600
Speaker 5: I don't think it's passive aggressive in a toxic way.

962
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 5: I think it's just can't toxic ution, how interact could be.

963
00:48:23,680 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 1: Passive aggression is the behavioral pattern characterized by expressing negative

964
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:30,080
Speaker 1: feelings indirectly rather than openly.

965
00:48:30,200 --> 00:48:30,600
Speaker 2: That's a lie.

966
00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:32,440
Speaker 3: I told you not to be with this nigga because

967
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:33,000
Speaker 3: he wasn't ship.

968
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:34,080
Speaker 2: I said it direct.

969
00:48:34,280 --> 00:48:37,840
Speaker 1: It often involves a person's anger or frustration being expressed

970
00:48:37,840 --> 00:48:43,760
Speaker 1: through action, sarcasm, or sullen behavior rather than direct confrontation.

971
00:48:46,600 --> 00:48:47,200
Speaker 3: Is there more.

972
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:53,359
Speaker 1: The key characteristics of passive aggression Mandy b yo, shut

973
00:48:53,640 --> 00:48:59,640
Speaker 1: suck my dick, indirect expression yes you do, okay, uh,

974
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 1: subtle actions. Passive aggression can manifest in various ways, including procrastination,

975
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:09,040
Speaker 1: resistance to request, giving back, canded compliments, or intentionally making mistakes.

976
00:49:09,040 --> 00:49:13,319
Speaker 1: I never intentionally make mistakes, avoid avoidance of direct communication,

977
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:14,279
Speaker 1: definitely do that.

978
00:49:15,880 --> 00:49:16,800
Speaker 2: Potential for damage.

979
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:21,320
Speaker 1: Consistent passing passive aggression can damage relationships and negatively impact

980
00:49:21,560 --> 00:49:22,320
Speaker 1: work environments.

981
00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:25,360
Speaker 3: Okay, listen, this is not for me to say that

982
00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 3: you are so wrong and there's none of that. We

983
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,560
Speaker 3: all have something toxic about us because of our child,

984
00:49:31,760 --> 00:49:33,399
Speaker 3: because of the way we grew up that we can change.

985
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:37,200
Speaker 3: And you're working out. It's a baby steps to get there,

986
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 3: you know, no crawling. You might might have stood up already.

987
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:42,799
Speaker 3: You know you're going for your baby steps, but you're

988
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:43,560
Speaker 3: doing the work.

989
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 2: If it's going fast, I know y'all don't see it,

990
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 2: but bitch on back and I'm doing.

991
00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:49,080
Speaker 3: There's a little bit of work happening, and it's going

992
00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:50,640
Speaker 3: to take a long time. You're thirty four years old.

993
00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:53,000
Speaker 3: You just started this journey what two years ago? No girl,

994
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:54,200
Speaker 3: first out there.

995
00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:57,640
Speaker 2: I feel like you that's a backhand account four years?

996
00:50:00,840 --> 00:50:04,400
Speaker 2: Did you are the therapy week on? I have been

997
00:50:04,440 --> 00:50:06,240
Speaker 2: in therapy weekly.

998
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:09,160
Speaker 3: So you think that in four years once a week

999
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:12,320
Speaker 3: undue thirty years adult, But the fact that you just

1000
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:14,840
Speaker 3: cut my therapy in hand, I'm sorry, I don't with

1001
00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:16,759
Speaker 3: you if time passes really fast and I realize it's

1002
00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:20,000
Speaker 3: been that long. But regardless, two or four years doesn't

1003
00:50:20,040 --> 00:50:21,920
Speaker 3: make one lick of a difference of what I'm thinking

1004
00:50:22,239 --> 00:50:26,400
Speaker 3: four years once a week versus thirty days day. I

1005
00:50:26,480 --> 00:50:29,160
Speaker 3: mean thirty years every single day, twenty four hours a day.

1006
00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 3: But you got a long way to go. You got

1007
00:50:30,680 --> 00:50:32,279
Speaker 3: a long way to go, as do I.

1008
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:32,759
Speaker 2: As do.

1009
00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:34,560
Speaker 3: People are listening to this, and I forgo about the

1010
00:50:34,560 --> 00:50:36,120
Speaker 3: fuck he was talking about because I got add if

1011
00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:36,840
Speaker 3: you don't keep going on.

1012
00:50:38,520 --> 00:50:43,120
Speaker 1: I wanted to get into the personal dynamic, Okay, remove

1013
00:50:43,160 --> 00:50:48,319
Speaker 1: from the generalization and bring the audience into someone who

1014
00:50:48,400 --> 00:50:51,200
Speaker 1: may be in my position and agree with my thoughts.

1015
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:52,440
Speaker 2: And misunderstanding of it.

1016
00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:53,800
Speaker 3: We're not gonna do that.

1017
00:50:54,520 --> 00:50:57,640
Speaker 1: Somebody else agree passive aggressive, she said, who agrees with

1018
00:50:57,719 --> 00:50:58,200
Speaker 1: your thoughts?

1019
00:50:58,280 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 2: Bitch, that's crazy.

1020
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:04,080
Speaker 1: Se Shout out to everyone listening to selective ignorance, shout.

1021
00:51:03,880 --> 00:51:06,400
Speaker 3: Out they don't agree, They're just listening. It's entertainment.

1022
00:51:08,320 --> 00:51:12,439
Speaker 1: Okay, So we are gonna get into our segment where

1023
00:51:13,040 --> 00:51:19,840
Speaker 1: it's hypocritical me, hypocritical, you hypocrisy essentially into the dynamic

1024
00:51:20,040 --> 00:51:23,920
Speaker 1: of your last relationship or previous relationships.

1025
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:25,400
Speaker 3: So where.

1026
00:51:27,560 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 1: Even in experiencing it in person, my lack of empathy

1027
00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:33,600
Speaker 1: continues to exist.

1028
00:51:33,880 --> 00:51:35,120
Speaker 3: Is that me is that.

1029
00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:39,920
Speaker 2: I thought I had the red the red flags was

1030
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:41,839
Speaker 2: being waved over here. Hold on, y'all.

1031
00:51:41,960 --> 00:51:44,560
Speaker 1: I was like, not only was I waving it like

1032
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:46,520
Speaker 1: the niggas they got to bring in the planes. I

1033
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: was that guy outside the motherfucking car the little car dealership.

1034
00:51:51,520 --> 00:51:53,880
Speaker 1: I was waving around the sign like like I was

1035
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:59,920
Speaker 1: selling mattresses. I said, I said, beware, I see all

1036
00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:01,759
Speaker 1: for my friend.

1037
00:52:02,080 --> 00:52:05,800
Speaker 2: And what I believe she deserves. This is not the

1038
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:09,719
Speaker 2: nigga because I I I mind you.

1039
00:52:10,520 --> 00:52:13,880
Speaker 1: He was sharing who he really was publicly, and motherfuckers

1040
00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:17,719
Speaker 1: thought it was entertainment. So my question to you is,

1041
00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:21,680
Speaker 1: with the warning from a very close friend, but also

1042
00:52:22,040 --> 00:52:25,279
Speaker 1: the warning from an ex, there were two women that

1043
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:28,160
Speaker 1: were warning you about what this relationship looked like.

1044
00:52:28,239 --> 00:52:33,120
Speaker 2: Well, no, because we knew from the chatter that there

1045
00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:36,799
Speaker 2: was potential abuse and that he wasn't seeing his kids.

1046
00:52:38,000 --> 00:52:38,960
Speaker 3: I didn't know about one woman.

1047
00:52:39,080 --> 00:52:40,439
Speaker 2: No, that's what I'm talking about, just the one woman.

1048
00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:47,840
Speaker 1: So and even this, do you need numbers to listen

1049
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:50,880
Speaker 1: to what you believe a man will be Anyways, I

1050
00:52:50,960 --> 00:52:53,399
Speaker 1: say this to bring up the personal and the real

1051
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:57,400
Speaker 1: life example of what made you not listen or believe

1052
00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:01,080
Speaker 1: a woman who had experienced a negati relationship with this man,

1053
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:05,319
Speaker 1: and also as a friend who read every red flag

1054
00:53:05,640 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 1: I saw it because I wasn't dating him, chose to

1055
00:53:08,120 --> 00:53:09,880
Speaker 1: ignore and believe that you would be the exception.

1056
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:16,560
Speaker 3: Okay, this is I want to preface it by saying,

1057
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:18,120
Speaker 3: this is not excuses. This is just kind of like

1058
00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 3: a timeline of what I thought that was happening right then,

1059
00:53:21,000 --> 00:53:23,879
Speaker 3: and that I can then tell you hindsight is twenty

1060
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:26,560
Speaker 3: twenty what really was happening. So first of all, the

1061
00:53:26,640 --> 00:53:31,040
Speaker 3: one person we knew about was ninety years prior. Okay,

1062
00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:34,160
Speaker 3: it had been a long time in that time from

1063
00:53:34,239 --> 00:53:37,680
Speaker 3: that person to when I showed up. There were no

1064
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:42,640
Speaker 3: claims of this at all, Like being from someone that's

1065
00:53:42,840 --> 00:53:45,000
Speaker 3: next to him on a daily basis was like he

1066
00:53:45,080 --> 00:53:47,520
Speaker 3: would never like he has never. I've never seen that

1067
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:49,440
Speaker 3: type of behavior. I don't think I can believe that,

1068
00:53:49,680 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 3: right So I'm being told by people around him like

1069
00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:58,400
Speaker 3: that moment is crazy. And to then give me proof

1070
00:53:58,520 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 3: of that, there were voicemails, voice notes, text messages that

1071
00:54:02,600 --> 00:54:03,280
Speaker 3: I'm seeing.

1072
00:54:03,160 --> 00:54:06,839
Speaker 2: That proved outside. But yes, well it's yeah.

1073
00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:08,879
Speaker 3: But I'm hearing her. I'm hearing the phone calls, I'm

1074
00:54:08,880 --> 00:54:11,080
Speaker 3: hearing the text messages. I'm hearing the people tell me

1075
00:54:11,200 --> 00:54:14,560
Speaker 3: that she I don't know, she's crazy. She's crazy. We're

1076
00:54:14,560 --> 00:54:17,279
Speaker 3: seeing it. So you're like, wow, and it's been nine

1077
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:19,640
Speaker 3: years and nothing like this has ever happened again that

1078
00:54:19,800 --> 00:54:22,560
Speaker 3: no one can give me anything so that we knew

1079
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:25,919
Speaker 3: of correct again, this is I'm in it. There's there's

1080
00:54:25,960 --> 00:54:29,240
Speaker 3: no bird's eye view. I'm in it. I'm watching pause.

1081
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:30,479
Speaker 3: I don't want to be a bird.

1082
00:54:34,719 --> 00:54:35,840
Speaker 2: That's about segment.

1083
00:54:37,760 --> 00:54:42,160
Speaker 3: There is a there was time he knew what well, boss,

1084
00:54:42,440 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 3: I knew what he was doing. He knew he was

1085
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:45,320
Speaker 3: going after They always know, they know what they know

1086
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:47,960
Speaker 3: what you got right, So there's tons of conversations. There

1087
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:49,239
Speaker 3: was a lot of flights of mine where it was

1088
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,799
Speaker 3: just like friendship, just casual talking from about a year prior.

1089
00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:54,759
Speaker 3: Then I get into the situation. Everything starts moving really

1090
00:54:54,800 --> 00:54:57,279
Speaker 3: fast at this time. Now, for about a year, he

1091
00:54:57,480 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 3: was hearing from the mic from phone from with my friends,

1092
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:03,799
Speaker 3: what I was looking for, what I wanted, the work

1093
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:06,719
Speaker 3: that I was doing. He had the tools.

1094
00:55:07,440 --> 00:55:07,920
Speaker 4: The tools.

1095
00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:14,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, the inside are the words or the language to

1096
00:55:14,680 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 3: make it seem like he was on the same page

1097
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:20,879
Speaker 3: with me and that and so that you were there

1098
00:55:21,080 --> 00:55:24,080
Speaker 3: at this point, the actions were matching what he was saying.

1099
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:25,879
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no, no, no, Let's be very clear.

1100
00:55:26,760 --> 00:55:29,480
Speaker 1: I always saw the actions even as red flags like

1101
00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:33,800
Speaker 1: which like for us to be out and him to

1102
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:36,439
Speaker 1: show up and ruin our Like we would be out

1103
00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:37,680
Speaker 1: and he would just show up.

1104
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:40,440
Speaker 2: You yes, you thought that that.

1105
00:55:40,560 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 1: Was the cutest thing ever show up to bro. We

1106
00:55:43,320 --> 00:55:46,880
Speaker 1: went to to clubs, like we we went to a

1107
00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:50,520
Speaker 1: club him were you he didn't come he showed up

1108
00:55:50,560 --> 00:55:50,879
Speaker 1: to us.

1109
00:55:51,680 --> 00:55:53,680
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, We didn't go. No, that

1110
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:55,920
Speaker 3: summer he would be at the house a lot that

1111
00:55:56,400 --> 00:55:57,879
Speaker 3: wh I know always comes to the house.

1112
00:55:57,960 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 2: We would go out and have but he would pop

1113
00:55:59,800 --> 00:56:01,480
Speaker 2: up and then drive us home.

1114
00:56:01,600 --> 00:56:05,000
Speaker 1: Oh yes, oh yes, So it would turn it would

1115
00:56:05,040 --> 00:56:08,759
Speaker 1: turn into where as two girls hanging out.

1116
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:10,640
Speaker 2: I'm thinking, who I'm hanging out with my friend?

1117
00:56:11,080 --> 00:56:14,200
Speaker 1: And maybe because he didn't trust me because I had

1118
00:56:14,239 --> 00:56:16,520
Speaker 1: a show called Horrible Decisions and he thought I was

1119
00:56:16,560 --> 00:56:17,239
Speaker 1: out here trying to.

1120
00:56:17,200 --> 00:56:20,319
Speaker 3: Whore you out. He would show me that he knew

1121
00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 3: that you would see past some ship and the way

1122
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:25,560
Speaker 3: that you read it like, ooh, he just wants to

1123
00:56:25,560 --> 00:56:26,520
Speaker 3: be around me all the time.

1124
00:56:26,880 --> 00:56:30,439
Speaker 1: I love this as a woman, especially codependent women one woman,

1125
00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:32,480
Speaker 1: they like that attention.

1126
00:56:33,120 --> 00:56:36,640
Speaker 2: I'm looking at it as Wait, this nigga's showing up,

1127
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:37,399
Speaker 2: ruining the fun.

1128
00:56:37,640 --> 00:56:40,279
Speaker 1: He's grabbing you away from me. You're now sitting down,

1129
00:56:40,760 --> 00:56:43,279
Speaker 1: were not drinking, were not partying anymore. He's there, So

1130
00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:47,120
Speaker 1: I'm like, I see what this is. Also, he's hungry, bitch.

1131
00:56:47,200 --> 00:56:49,120
Speaker 1: It's one o'clock in the morning. You're cooking out those

1132
00:56:49,160 --> 00:56:52,200
Speaker 1: compoile to feed this nigga at one So there's a

1133
00:56:52,280 --> 00:56:54,120
Speaker 1: way that yes, you show up and care for man.

1134
00:56:54,360 --> 00:56:59,279
Speaker 2: But I'm seeing it. Oh are you still hearing?

1135
00:56:59,840 --> 00:57:02,440
Speaker 3: Get there? A lot of things have changed, but yes,

1136
00:57:02,480 --> 00:57:03,200
Speaker 3: I still love to cook it.

1137
00:57:07,080 --> 00:57:08,399
Speaker 2: I don't cook.

1138
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:11,719
Speaker 3: I don't, but I don't think I go in like

1139
00:57:11,800 --> 00:57:14,400
Speaker 3: I did before. That comes from a space of me

1140
00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:17,720
Speaker 3: needing something that I was fulfilling something through a man

1141
00:57:17,880 --> 00:57:20,200
Speaker 3: and their need that I needed to fulfill by myself.

1142
00:57:21,400 --> 00:57:24,240
Speaker 3: So I had never been a move. I've got pregnant

1143
00:57:24,280 --> 00:57:26,200
Speaker 3: at seventeen, was married for six years, and I was

1144
00:57:26,240 --> 00:57:29,240
Speaker 3: in a six year relationship and I was a relationship

1145
00:57:29,320 --> 00:57:32,360
Speaker 3: and got into another one. I never was a longle

1146
00:57:32,640 --> 00:57:35,120
Speaker 3: or alone, and I'm never alone because I've been a

1147
00:57:35,200 --> 00:57:38,480
Speaker 3: mom since I was eighteen, so I'm always caring for someone.

1148
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:40,480
Speaker 3: So when i feel like there's someone there, I need help.

1149
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:44,200
Speaker 3: I wanted that and I didn't know how to do

1150
00:57:44,320 --> 00:57:47,840
Speaker 3: that for myself. You know, I've been single fort that.

1151
00:57:49,520 --> 00:57:54,480
Speaker 1: Celebrating it, but no, I've been able to really find

1152
00:57:54,880 --> 00:57:57,600
Speaker 1: what you would want in a partner and really address

1153
00:57:57,680 --> 00:57:59,040
Speaker 1: your own traumas.

1154
00:57:58,640 --> 00:58:03,720
Speaker 2: Because and y'all made y'all don't know this, but it took,

1155
00:58:04,760 --> 00:58:05,440
Speaker 2: and you're stealing it.

1156
00:58:06,080 --> 00:58:09,800
Speaker 1: You can name exactly the traits about you that made

1157
00:58:09,840 --> 00:58:12,440
Speaker 1: you the perfect victim for a man like this, and

1158
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:15,240
Speaker 1: I want you for maybe because there's women listening. What

1159
00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:19,880
Speaker 1: are list of five traits that you knew that your faults,

1160
00:58:20,440 --> 00:58:24,680
Speaker 1: your traumas, that showed that baby gave him green flax,

1161
00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:27,280
Speaker 1: that you would be the perfect candidate for him to

1162
00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 1: sink his clauses.

1163
00:58:28,960 --> 00:58:32,040
Speaker 3: My dad had just passed away, so you're your yearning.

1164
00:58:32,440 --> 00:58:35,480
Speaker 3: You were great that male figure. Again, I've never had

1165
00:58:35,480 --> 00:58:38,640
Speaker 3: a good relationship with my mother or a healthy relationship

1166
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:41,440
Speaker 3: my mother was someone that it was I learned to

1167
00:58:41,680 --> 00:58:45,120
Speaker 3: get the affection and the love from someone by doing

1168
00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:48,040
Speaker 3: something for them. So I had to do in order

1169
00:58:48,080 --> 00:58:51,720
Speaker 3: to receive love or feel accepted. Okay, so that's another

1170
00:58:51,840 --> 00:58:53,760
Speaker 3: thing I would say. Like I said, I didn't know

1171
00:58:53,800 --> 00:58:56,600
Speaker 3: how to be alone, like my thoughts, being alone in

1172
00:58:56,680 --> 00:58:58,480
Speaker 3: my thoughts and what I thought about me, and it's

1173
00:58:58,560 --> 00:59:01,160
Speaker 3: like society telling me I'm not worth anything. Then i

1174
00:59:01,240 --> 00:59:03,000
Speaker 3: have a baby out of wetlock. So I'm like, I

1175
00:59:03,000 --> 00:59:04,840
Speaker 3: gotta find a husband. I want to I want to

1176
00:59:04,840 --> 00:59:05,960
Speaker 3: do the right thing. I just want to college. I

1177
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:07,840
Speaker 3: have a degree. I still don't have this white picket. Friends,

1178
00:59:08,120 --> 00:59:11,720
Speaker 3: It's like, oh my god. I thought I really needed

1179
00:59:11,760 --> 00:59:14,680
Speaker 3: to be a wife and have another child and do

1180
00:59:14,760 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 3: the right thing. I wanted to fix what I messed

1181
00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:19,800
Speaker 3: up the first time I was married. It ain't work.

1182
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:21,840
Speaker 3: I had my daughter. I wanted to give her a man.

1183
00:59:22,160 --> 00:59:23,640
Speaker 3: I'm now my daughter at the time when I meet

1184
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,080
Speaker 3: him as thirteen years old, she's twenty now, she's thirteen

1185
00:59:26,120 --> 00:59:27,720
Speaker 3: at the time, and I'm like, I gotta show her

1186
00:59:27,720 --> 00:59:30,720
Speaker 3: a healthy family. I have to show her a healthy man.

1187
00:59:31,160 --> 00:59:35,480
Speaker 3: I have to And he was like like, I'm there

1188
00:59:35,560 --> 00:59:37,680
Speaker 3: to show you exactly and said all the right words,

1189
00:59:37,720 --> 00:59:39,560
Speaker 3: showed up. I have pictures of him showing her how

1190
00:59:39,600 --> 00:59:41,840
Speaker 3: to mo along, but nah, think back this nigga' even

1191
00:59:41,840 --> 00:59:43,160
Speaker 3: know how to turn that shit on Dan. You know

1192
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:45,640
Speaker 3: what I'm saying. Like they pretend to do all these things,

1193
00:59:45,720 --> 00:59:47,840
Speaker 3: like teach her about all these things, but that doesn't

1194
00:59:47,920 --> 00:59:50,440
Speaker 3: last very long. And if I would have just taken

1195
00:59:50,760 --> 00:59:53,640
Speaker 3: my biggest fault here, if I was just not taking

1196
00:59:53,640 --> 00:59:58,560
Speaker 3: it to me time, no, just regardless's not listening. If

1197
00:59:58,560 --> 01:00:01,080
Speaker 3: I would have taken some time to down, and I

1198
01:00:01,160 --> 01:00:04,360
Speaker 3: have another friend that was very against the the relations decks,

1199
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:06,400
Speaker 3: Dex didn't agree with the relationship. Deck saw the red

1200
01:00:06,480 --> 01:00:08,640
Speaker 3: flags from day one two. But Dex is very different

1201
01:00:08,680 --> 01:00:10,439
Speaker 3: from you. While she's like, this is gonna make you happy,

1202
01:00:10,560 --> 01:00:13,479
Speaker 3: I'm here, like I'm here to when you need something?

1203
01:00:13,520 --> 01:00:14,160
Speaker 2: What do you right now?

1204
01:00:14,200 --> 01:00:16,560
Speaker 3: You're happy I'm there to support you, but I'm also

1205
01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:17,880
Speaker 3: she'd be like, you want tool.

1206
01:00:17,600 --> 01:00:18,040
Speaker 5: That a little bit.

1207
01:00:18,560 --> 01:00:20,920
Speaker 3: You're like, Deck together, kind you must hold that a

1208
01:00:20,960 --> 01:00:21,920
Speaker 3: little bit. You don't think it's going to.

1209
01:00:21,920 --> 01:00:22,360
Speaker 4: Go too fast.

1210
01:00:22,400 --> 01:00:23,880
Speaker 2: You sure you want to do this? It's crazy, it

1211
01:00:24,000 --> 01:00:25,720
Speaker 2: is a plan. Well, you brought up and That's why

1212
01:00:25,760 --> 01:00:26,280
Speaker 2: I said.

1213
01:00:26,160 --> 01:00:29,520
Speaker 1: We're all we all have trauma from patriarchy, right, We're

1214
01:00:29,520 --> 01:00:34,040
Speaker 1: all victims of what people perceive a woman should look

1215
01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:36,680
Speaker 1: like in happiness, and a lot of that is, well,

1216
01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:38,720
Speaker 1: you would be happy if you were a mom, if

1217
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:40,160
Speaker 1: you were a wife, if you had a man that

1218
01:00:40,280 --> 01:00:41,560
Speaker 1: was around, if you had a man to.

1219
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:43,320
Speaker 3: Cook for, if you had a man, especially if you're

1220
01:00:43,320 --> 01:00:43,760
Speaker 3: a teen mom.

1221
01:00:43,880 --> 01:00:46,360
Speaker 2: And so it's the it is, it's the it is.

1222
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:49,840
Speaker 1: The fear of being alone that pushes women to just

1223
01:00:50,040 --> 01:00:54,439
Speaker 1: accept the crumbs that sometimes these niggas have to offer

1224
01:00:55,160 --> 01:00:59,080
Speaker 1: and to just unfortunately, I do believe that they're going

1225
01:00:59,120 --> 01:01:00,600
Speaker 1: to get a different version of a man that has

1226
01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:01,480
Speaker 1: showed up away.

1227
01:01:01,360 --> 01:01:03,240
Speaker 3: For someone or is you're like, I'm going to give

1228
01:01:03,560 --> 01:01:07,360
Speaker 3: them grace that they've changed. I'm a thirty eight year

1229
01:01:07,360 --> 01:01:11,200
Speaker 3: old team mom, literally, that's all I am. To many

1230
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:14,720
Speaker 3: people look at her, did it again? Fucked up again? Yeah?

1231
01:01:14,760 --> 01:01:17,800
Speaker 3: I had a man who flew into a hurricane. Yeah,

1232
01:01:18,040 --> 01:01:21,040
Speaker 3: to come help me, a man that would support everything

1233
01:01:21,080 --> 01:01:22,520
Speaker 3: that I was doing. Or you need equipment for this

1234
01:01:22,680 --> 01:01:24,960
Speaker 3: because at the time he had a job and he

1235
01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:27,520
Speaker 3: paid for the support. Was it taken out of his check?

1236
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:27,720
Speaker 1: Yes?

1237
01:01:27,800 --> 01:01:29,320
Speaker 3: But he was paying the entire time I knew him

1238
01:01:29,320 --> 01:01:31,120
Speaker 3: in years prior, you know what I mean. So there's

1239
01:01:31,120 --> 01:01:33,160
Speaker 3: all these little things. I just didn't get to see

1240
01:01:33,160 --> 01:01:35,640
Speaker 3: the things that he was the full picture when we

1241
01:01:35,680 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 3: didn't when we weren't around. There were messages sent that

1242
01:01:38,320 --> 01:01:40,720
Speaker 3: were deleted, there were phone calls we weren't a part of.

1243
01:01:40,920 --> 01:01:43,600
Speaker 3: So when the person is reacting, that's all we see.

1244
01:01:43,720 --> 01:01:48,240
Speaker 1: What was your feeling like, having had talked to the

1245
01:01:48,320 --> 01:01:54,760
Speaker 1: previous partner and learning her experience, what did you were

1246
01:01:54,800 --> 01:01:57,400
Speaker 1: you upset with yourself for not believing her the woman

1247
01:01:58,120 --> 01:01:58,880
Speaker 1: for a long time.

1248
01:01:59,000 --> 01:02:00,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, because while she's telling me, I'm like, I'm two

1249
01:02:00,800 --> 01:02:04,120
Speaker 3: and a half years and I've never experienced this, never

1250
01:02:04,160 --> 01:02:07,040
Speaker 3: experienced I didn't experience it. I out to Jersey, So

1251
01:02:07,240 --> 01:02:08,720
Speaker 3: I'm like, I don't know what you're like.

1252
01:02:08,840 --> 01:02:11,080
Speaker 1: I I don't know this person you're saying. I'm like,

1253
01:02:11,200 --> 01:02:14,360
Speaker 1: and then when you started experiencing that same person, I said.

1254
01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:18,959
Speaker 2: Oh shit, oh fuck, I'm fucking odell. There, I see

1255
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:19,320
Speaker 2: it now.

1256
01:02:19,680 --> 01:02:23,600
Speaker 3: And I moved pretty quickly because I was already I

1257
01:02:23,720 --> 01:02:25,760
Speaker 3: never stopped. I started going to therapy right before him.

1258
01:02:25,760 --> 01:02:29,000
Speaker 3: In twenty seventeen, twenty eighteen, him and I start talking,

1259
01:02:29,520 --> 01:02:33,160
Speaker 3: and this all happens now twenty twenty, twenty one, twenty one,

1260
01:02:33,200 --> 01:02:36,680
Speaker 3: twentyre as soon as the baby's born. So that's when

1261
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:40,040
Speaker 3: things change. And I'm like, yeah, I'm in it now, but.

1262
01:02:40,440 --> 01:02:43,480
Speaker 2: It's so funny. I don't know what the science is,

1263
01:02:43,600 --> 01:02:43,880
Speaker 2: y'all know.

1264
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:47,880
Speaker 1: I questioned science anyways, But I need the study of

1265
01:02:48,040 --> 01:02:50,640
Speaker 1: why relationships go south after the baby.

1266
01:02:50,760 --> 01:02:54,200
Speaker 3: Because it's tough. It's tough you have immature men who

1267
01:02:54,240 --> 01:02:58,240
Speaker 3: want all of your attention to the baby. Absolutely, he

1268
01:02:58,360 --> 01:03:01,280
Speaker 3: used to hate breastfeeding me, breastfeeding him. Not that he

1269
01:03:01,400 --> 01:03:03,200
Speaker 3: was bad that the baby was on a nipple, Yes,

1270
01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:05,080
Speaker 3: it was like, oh, he didn't even give my teddies back.

1271
01:03:05,080 --> 01:03:08,520
Speaker 3: First of all, we'd be in public and he'd be like,

1272
01:03:08,560 --> 01:03:10,480
Speaker 3: you want a breastfet go in the bathroom. He's like,

1273
01:03:10,520 --> 01:03:12,160
Speaker 3: go sit in the stall and breastfeedt if figuring in

1274
01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:14,600
Speaker 3: a breastfeed not out here. I couldn't say the name

1275
01:03:14,640 --> 01:03:18,600
Speaker 3: of another man. Once that baby was born, things change,

1276
01:03:18,680 --> 01:03:21,320
Speaker 3: and as a woman you want to be there. Yeah,

1277
01:03:21,440 --> 01:03:22,760
Speaker 3: as a woman, you want to make it work. I

1278
01:03:22,840 --> 01:03:24,480
Speaker 3: just told you I came into this relationship because I

1279
01:03:24,480 --> 01:03:27,240
Speaker 3: wanted to show my daughter, a new version of a family.

1280
01:03:27,520 --> 01:03:30,080
Speaker 3: I need to show her what a marriage so so emotional.

1281
01:03:30,160 --> 01:03:32,200
Speaker 3: I need to show her that she's about to be

1282
01:03:32,280 --> 01:03:35,680
Speaker 3: a teenager, she's about to be a woman. She has

1283
01:03:35,760 --> 01:03:38,160
Speaker 3: to know what love is, what respect is, what a household,

1284
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:39,640
Speaker 3: what a man looks like. So you look for that,

1285
01:03:39,880 --> 01:03:41,360
Speaker 3: and I ended up showing her the worst.

1286
01:03:42,160 --> 01:03:46,640
Speaker 1: Unfortunately, course correction or wanting to do something in spite,

1287
01:03:46,760 --> 01:03:50,840
Speaker 1: so the outcome of something else never ends well.

1288
01:03:50,880 --> 01:03:53,680
Speaker 3: When you go into something with a plan of your

1289
01:03:53,720 --> 01:03:55,840
Speaker 3: own that you're just hyper focused and not willing to

1290
01:03:55,880 --> 01:03:58,520
Speaker 3: see outside of it. Yeah, we're going hyper focus to

1291
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:01,880
Speaker 3: either despising some more nows or and by despise, I

1292
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:03,840
Speaker 3: mean like for me, I'm gonna show them that I

1293
01:04:03,840 --> 01:04:05,200
Speaker 3: can get a husband, and I'm gonna show them that

1294
01:04:05,240 --> 01:04:06,760
Speaker 3: could be a good wife. And I'm gonna show them

1295
01:04:06,800 --> 01:04:08,280
Speaker 3: that I could, I could do the things the way

1296
01:04:08,280 --> 01:04:10,000
Speaker 3: that they want me to do, because women they hyper

1297
01:04:10,080 --> 01:04:12,080
Speaker 3: focus on. I just want to be loved and I

1298
01:04:12,120 --> 01:04:14,080
Speaker 3: want a boyfriend. I want to partner, which is why

1299
01:04:14,280 --> 01:04:17,560
Speaker 3: all of the outside, the people around us telling us

1300
01:04:17,560 --> 01:04:18,960
Speaker 3: that's how, that's what it's good. I had to do.

1301
01:04:19,280 --> 01:04:21,439
Speaker 2: It's not not only about the outside people.

1302
01:04:21,560 --> 01:04:24,360
Speaker 1: Again, we could blame patriarchy, but kind of like how

1303
01:04:24,400 --> 01:04:28,600
Speaker 1: we started this episode, women seek love, partnership, soulmates. Men

1304
01:04:28,800 --> 01:04:31,680
Speaker 1: not so much, and so the blind is all on

1305
01:04:32,320 --> 01:04:35,640
Speaker 1: the The blinded veil around it all is the fact

1306
01:04:35,720 --> 01:04:40,760
Speaker 1: that a woman wanting to be loved so bad, wanting

1307
01:04:40,920 --> 01:04:45,560
Speaker 1: partnership so bad, will literally ignore everything telling them that

1308
01:04:45,680 --> 01:04:47,320
Speaker 1: this is not the person for them, just so that

1309
01:04:47,400 --> 01:04:48,520
Speaker 1: they could say they got a nigga.

1310
01:04:49,840 --> 01:04:51,720
Speaker 3: Yes. There is an aspect of just saying that they

1311
01:04:51,760 --> 01:04:53,880
Speaker 3: have a man. Yes, And there's also an aspect of

1312
01:04:53,920 --> 01:04:56,000
Speaker 3: feeling fulfilled even though you're not. And when you are

1313
01:04:56,040 --> 01:04:58,280
Speaker 3: a woman listening to this, regardless of what your age is,

1314
01:04:58,400 --> 01:05:00,680
Speaker 3: if you really feel like you don't feel complete without

1315
01:05:00,680 --> 01:05:02,240
Speaker 3: a man, this feels so dumb when you're in it,

1316
01:05:02,280 --> 01:05:04,520
Speaker 3: when you're looking for that love. But if you don't

1317
01:05:04,560 --> 01:05:07,800
Speaker 3: feel complete, baby, go find a way for you to

1318
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:09,760
Speaker 3: make yourself complete. I remember my ask you to say

1319
01:05:09,760 --> 01:05:13,200
Speaker 3: all the time, you complete me, and I'd be like, no,

1320
01:05:13,640 --> 01:05:15,840
Speaker 3: I'm come complete. You need to be complete. He's like, Nah,

1321
01:05:16,080 --> 01:05:18,600
Speaker 3: that's not how it works. You guys have to complete minute.

1322
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:22,000
Speaker 3: I'm not complete. How I think that that's not good

1323
01:05:22,640 --> 01:05:23,479
Speaker 3: listen to blame.

1324
01:05:23,600 --> 01:05:26,320
Speaker 2: I blame the Spice girls. What they say when to

1325
01:05:26,680 --> 01:05:35,040
Speaker 2: become one? I need some line like I never needed you, bab.

1326
01:05:35,840 --> 01:05:37,400
Speaker 2: You don't know goddamn when to become one?

1327
01:05:38,320 --> 01:05:40,120
Speaker 3: Sorry? No, I'm sorry, Barbie girl.

1328
01:05:40,440 --> 01:05:42,680
Speaker 2: Okay, no, that is oh my god. All right, y'all.

1329
01:05:42,800 --> 01:05:45,360
Speaker 1: On that note, I want to ask the audience a

1330
01:05:45,480 --> 01:05:46,920
Speaker 1: question before we get out of here.

1331
01:05:47,360 --> 01:05:49,440
Speaker 3: I do want to know if you feel like there

1332
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:50,480
Speaker 3: is room.

1333
01:05:50,920 --> 01:05:54,040
Speaker 1: To hold empathy with the woman who chooses to keep

1334
01:05:54,080 --> 01:05:56,680
Speaker 1: getting with the same folk niggas back to bet to bet.

1335
01:05:57,680 --> 01:05:59,720
Speaker 1: That's well, that's a little bit of my question. Do

1336
01:05:59,800 --> 01:06:01,280
Speaker 1: you have a question for the audience before we get

1337
01:06:01,320 --> 01:06:04,880
Speaker 1: out of here? Carlo, I don't have a question. Want therapy, okay,

1338
01:06:04,920 --> 01:06:06,959
Speaker 1: in a book, not some podcasts.

1339
01:06:07,080 --> 01:06:10,840
Speaker 2: Not speaking of listening to podcasts, where can they listen

1340
01:06:10,960 --> 01:06:11,280
Speaker 2: to you?

1341
01:06:11,600 --> 01:06:13,440
Speaker 3: I have a podcast with my co host dex So

1342
01:06:13,560 --> 01:06:16,720
Speaker 3: what Now podcast? We talk about women had a motherhood

1343
01:06:16,760 --> 01:06:19,000
Speaker 3: after in your late thirties and forties and she's forty

1344
01:06:19,200 --> 01:06:20,440
Speaker 3: and what to do now is like, so when I'm

1345
01:06:20,440 --> 01:06:21,960
Speaker 3: getting older and all these things have happened to you,

1346
01:06:22,840 --> 01:06:23,680
Speaker 3: now I've had therapy.

1347
01:06:24,000 --> 01:06:24,520
Speaker 6: So what now?

1348
01:06:24,600 --> 01:06:26,040
Speaker 3: I have therapy? I don't have to find a man.

1349
01:06:26,880 --> 01:06:29,400
Speaker 3: I do not that I want one, but if it comes.

1350
01:06:29,840 --> 01:06:29,960
Speaker 4: Uh.

1351
01:06:30,280 --> 01:06:32,840
Speaker 3: And then I did launch production, So anything that has

1352
01:06:32,880 --> 01:06:35,680
Speaker 3: to do launching a podcast, relaunching production behind the scenes,

1353
01:06:35,760 --> 01:06:38,200
Speaker 3: virtual or in person, that is. I. By the way,

1354
01:06:38,240 --> 01:06:40,120
Speaker 3: I hope y'all weren't rolling your eyes too much on

1355
01:06:40,240 --> 01:06:42,320
Speaker 3: some God damn Mandy, you got a black ass heart.

1356
01:06:42,400 --> 01:06:45,439
Speaker 1: You don't fucking give grace, you don't have empathy, fuck

1357
01:06:45,520 --> 01:06:46,560
Speaker 1: ass pussyss hope.

1358
01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:47,040
Speaker 4: Uh.

1359
01:06:47,320 --> 01:06:48,920
Speaker 3: Anyways, working on it. At the end of the day,

1360
01:06:49,000 --> 01:06:50,520
Speaker 3: y'all can hate it or you can love it.

1361
01:06:51,120 --> 01:06:51,480
Speaker 2: Either way.

1362
01:06:51,560 --> 01:06:54,720
Speaker 1: Are you choosing to be selectively ignorant or are you

1363
01:06:54,840 --> 01:06:57,320
Speaker 1: going to choose to get educated?

1364
01:06:57,600 --> 01:06:59,360
Speaker 2: For you, I will see bitch always.

1365
01:07:02,480 --> 01:07:02,840
Speaker 3: No, no, no.

1366
01:07:03,040 --> 01:07:05,720
Speaker 1: I educate myself and I learned through my experiences, let's

1367
01:07:05,760 --> 01:07:08,800
Speaker 1: be very clear. And therapy of course, So y'all get

1368
01:07:08,840 --> 01:07:11,400
Speaker 1: y'all asses and therapy. It works, believe it or go

1369
01:07:11,480 --> 01:07:14,680
Speaker 1: to church. He just loves you, Okay, go to therapy.

1370
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:17,080
Speaker 2: All right, y'all see you next week.

1371
01:07:21,440 --> 01:07:23,720
Speaker 4: Thanks for tuning in. The Selective Ignorance of Mandy B.

1372
01:07:23,920 --> 01:07:27,120
Speaker 4: Selective Ignorance. It's executive produced by Mandy B. And it's

1373
01:07:27,120 --> 01:07:32,120
Speaker 4: a Full Court Media Studio production with lead producers Jason Mondriguez.

1374
01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:33,680
Speaker 3: That's me and Aaron A. King Howard.

1375
01:07:33,760 --> 01:07:36,720
Speaker 4: Now, do us a favor and rate, Subscribe, comment and

1376
01:07:36,840 --> 01:07:39,920
Speaker 4: share wherever you get your favorite podcast, and be sure

1377
01:07:39,960 --> 01:07:44,640
Speaker 4: to follow Selective Ignorance on Instagram at Selective Underscore Ignorance.

1378
01:07:44,680 --> 01:07:46,840
Speaker 4: And of course, if you're not following our hosts Mandy

1379
01:07:46,920 --> 01:07:49,600
Speaker 4: B make sure you're following her at full Court Pumps. Now.

1380
01:07:49,640 --> 01:07:52,400
Speaker 4: If you want the full video experience of Selective Ignorance,

1381
01:07:52,560 --> 01:07:55,800
Speaker 4: make sure you subscribe to the patreons patreon dot com

1382
01:07:56,200 --> 01:07:58,360
Speaker 4: backslash Selective Ignorance