1 00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and Samantha and welcome to stuff 2 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:18,680 Speaker 1: I never told to your production of iHeart Radio. And 3 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:22,279 Speaker 1: welcome to our sub sub segment of Sex in the 4 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:25,360 Speaker 1: City Dune. Done done, done, Okay, anyway, we're are on 5 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:29,360 Speaker 1: episode eight and we are sitting with Mimosa's ready to 6 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:33,800 Speaker 1: go drink responsibly if you are so drinking, um A B. 7 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:36,040 Speaker 1: If you're not, still be responsible, you know, if your 8 00:00:36,040 --> 00:00:40,840 Speaker 1: life enjoy it, if you have thirty minutes sit with us, yes, 9 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:45,840 Speaker 1: and if you want to hear our reactions of these 10 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:51,240 Speaker 1: episodes of delightful Sex in the City. It is over 11 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:56,520 Speaker 1: twenty years old, these jokes. I know, I feel very old. Yeah, 12 00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:58,880 Speaker 1: it's a good thing. Like I kind of wish I 13 00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 1: had seen it when it would originally released, would have 14 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:03,880 Speaker 1: been eighteen nineteen. But I feel like, yeah, I would 15 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:07,240 Speaker 1: have been very jaded by how my life did not 16 00:01:07,319 --> 00:01:10,960 Speaker 1: look like Yeah, the Sex and the City ladies. Yeah. 17 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:13,039 Speaker 1: I think that's one of the interesting things about this 18 00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:16,360 Speaker 1: is there is that kind of fantasy aspect of this 19 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:20,720 Speaker 1: whole thing, and they're kind of their lives, their fashion, 20 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,080 Speaker 1: and they're in their thirties at this point, so they 21 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:26,399 Speaker 1: are a little ahead of me, but I would have 22 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:28,760 Speaker 1: expected to be that instead of in my situation of 23 00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:32,080 Speaker 1: getting like twenty nine thousand dollars a year as a 24 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:35,399 Speaker 1: social worker, living with roommates, trying to figure out my 25 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:40,720 Speaker 1: life but not in love. More so combating trauma. So 26 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:43,160 Speaker 1: it's a whole different thing. This is a very privileged look, 27 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 1: but sometimes privileges nice to see. So we can kind 28 00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:49,800 Speaker 1: of escape from our own trauma, you know. Um, and 29 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:52,960 Speaker 1: yes we are on episode eight, Annie, would you like 30 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:57,360 Speaker 1: to do a recap for us? Yeah? Okay. Well, we've 31 00:01:57,400 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 1: talked about monogamy and the defining the relationship as you 32 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:09,079 Speaker 1: dr educated people know, and exclusivity. Um, we've talked about 33 00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:13,440 Speaker 1: single versus married women. We've talked about a lot of 34 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:16,840 Speaker 1: friendship stuff and supporting friendship, having sex with twenty year olds, 35 00:02:17,200 --> 00:02:21,200 Speaker 1: having oral sex and anal sex, all kinds of sex, yes, 36 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:25,120 Speaker 1: all the sex, all that, all the specifically that makes sense, 37 00:02:25,919 --> 00:02:31,200 Speaker 1: that makes sense. Uh. Yeah, we've gone all over. We've 38 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:33,160 Speaker 1: got all over and talked about all kinds of things, 39 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,960 Speaker 1: all the things. And if you do like this segment, 40 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:38,760 Speaker 1: just so you know, we do eventually want to broaden 41 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 1: our horizons. Is that the words? Uh? And bringing other 42 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,800 Speaker 1: people on and we're hoping to have some of your 43 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 1: classic people that you've heard on our show before to 44 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,440 Speaker 1: come in and have their own take in our conversations. 45 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 1: But we also eventually would like to have one of 46 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:56,000 Speaker 1: you wonderful listeners and maybe a friend that you would 47 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:57,799 Speaker 1: like to bring along and have a conversation and a 48 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,640 Speaker 1: watch party with us. Uh So look out on social 49 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:05,720 Speaker 1: media as well as listen to to have yourself entered. 50 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:08,880 Speaker 1: It's not exactly a contest, but you know, we can't 51 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 1: pick everyone. They would be chaotic, but we have about 52 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:20,520 Speaker 1: eighties seven episodes liberal but so listen out for that. Eventually, 53 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:23,080 Speaker 1: we would love to have more people participate, although I 54 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:26,600 Speaker 1: do love our conversation Danny Um. Okay, So let's go 55 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:29,400 Speaker 1: ahead and with episode eight of season one, which is 56 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:33,240 Speaker 1: titled three is a Crowd? What do you think this 57 00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:37,280 Speaker 1: is about? This has been hard because the description is 58 00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:39,440 Speaker 1: on the television look at it, and I've tried very 59 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:41,840 Speaker 1: hard not to look at it. I haven't, but it's 60 00:03:42,160 --> 00:03:46,520 Speaker 1: been a test listeners. I'm imagining after what just happened 61 00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:50,320 Speaker 1: in the previous episode, which is about exclusivity and monogamy, 62 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:56,360 Speaker 1: that is about threas I'm guessing with Carrie and Big 63 00:03:56,400 --> 00:04:01,120 Speaker 1: after the last one. I'm trying very hard to be 64 00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:04,720 Speaker 1: because there's also an image on screen, so I'm trying 65 00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 1: in my mind what I think it is. So I 66 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:12,240 Speaker 1: think it's gonna be like and expounding on this idea 67 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:16,520 Speaker 1: of more than not a monogamous relationship or something outside 68 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:19,599 Speaker 1: of monogamy. Yes. Also, I have mentioned this episode before 69 00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:21,960 Speaker 1: as well, and I will go ahead and read the 70 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,760 Speaker 1: descriptor because I forgot I wanted to do that. We're 71 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:26,720 Speaker 1: going to bring things in, y'all. Be really, that's why 72 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:28,400 Speaker 1: we need the first season, just for us to do 73 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 1: trial and error. But it says Carrie discovers not only 74 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: that Mr Big was married before we talked about that, 75 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:41,440 Speaker 1: but that he and his ex participated in a threesome. 76 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:44,239 Speaker 1: So you are correct, there is a threesome involved. I 77 00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:46,920 Speaker 1: mentioned this episode and just like that, because I told 78 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,240 Speaker 1: you we do get introduced to his ex wives. That's right, 79 00:04:51,120 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 1: all right, here we go, Okay, you me and another woman. 80 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:17,520 Speaker 1: Come on, serious, Charlotte, you have no idea how sexy 81 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:20,800 Speaker 1: you are, do you? Oh? You're so sex It sounds 82 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:25,040 Speaker 1: like a weird gaslighting thing because he said, you know, 83 00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:28,920 Speaker 1: my fantasy is threesome with you. You're so sexy. You 84 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 1: have no idea how sexy are Charlotte or your sexuality, 85 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 1: But it sounds like he just wants to have a threason. 86 00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:43,360 Speaker 1: First you start thinking you're hot, then he brings up 87 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 1: the threesome thing. Boom, suddenly you're kissing another woman while 88 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:50,159 Speaker 1: he beats off. Please just make sure that the other 89 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:52,920 Speaker 1: woman isn't a friend. Would you want a friend or 90 00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:56,359 Speaker 1: someone random for a threesome? Yeah, this conversation, Yes, I 91 00:05:56,400 --> 00:05:59,520 Speaker 1: have had this conversation with a friend with with someone 92 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:04,400 Speaker 1: I could try us like Carrie, so they named Carrie. 93 00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 1: But I got with someone who has a little more 94 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:11,880 Speaker 1: experience like Sam. Okay, pass it onto going Sam is 95 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:17,000 Speaker 1: experien like Charlotte. And then she goes back to Charlotte 96 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:20,200 Speaker 1: saying that you know something like bad first timer? Right 97 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 1: forgot about me and poor Mariana doing with you out 98 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:37,040 Speaker 1: It's like picking teams for Dodgeball all over again. Maybe 99 00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,799 Speaker 1: she's more your taste. Stop it and he's now trying 100 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:45,080 Speaker 1: to find women for their Yeah, I will say there 101 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:47,080 Speaker 1: is a couple that I think was trying hard to 102 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:49,920 Speaker 1: get me to be a threesome. Yeah, I had that 103 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:59,640 Speaker 1: a couple of times X file spanaddic two songs seeks Scully, 104 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:03,719 Speaker 1: look like, this is what I was talking to me about, 105 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 1: the Scully, the Scully refie. That's what I was talking about. 106 00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:11,119 Speaker 1: What we were talking about, Scully and the women around 107 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,360 Speaker 1: the world, fictional women around the world. So there's a 108 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:19,120 Speaker 1: there was a couple and Verry Nerdy and golden showers. 109 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:21,760 Speaker 1: So she talks about being in golden showers. I did 110 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,120 Speaker 1: not know what that was until way later because I 111 00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:28,240 Speaker 1: have another episode about them, Like, oh, I really pictured 112 00:07:28,280 --> 00:07:33,400 Speaker 1: a literal golden shower. I thought you was like imagined, 113 00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:36,520 Speaker 1: like imagining the shower was made of gold and they 114 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:38,520 Speaker 1: were going to she I thought she was referencing that 115 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:41,200 Speaker 1: as like she wanted a rich guy. Did not realize 116 00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:44,400 Speaker 1: what that was. Yea, and it was fine, wasn't. But 117 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 1: like I, as a naive person, I was like, what 118 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:58,200 Speaker 1: assuming I knew right, I wanted to interview someone what threesomes? 119 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:06,880 Speaker 1: Every good one? Sure? Who hasn't really with who? My 120 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:10,240 Speaker 1: ex wife? Oh? My column was the last thing on 121 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: my mind. You were married? Yeah? Yeah, what I told you? No, No, 122 00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:28,280 Speaker 1: you didn't. Charlotte was right, we don't really know the 123 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:31,320 Speaker 1: people we sleep with. After all, what did I really 124 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:34,120 Speaker 1: know about Mr Big except he had an ex wife 125 00:08:34,200 --> 00:08:38,640 Speaker 1: named Barbara, who I quickly discovered worked in publishing stock 126 00:08:38,720 --> 00:08:43,839 Speaker 1: I'm picturesque. I guess this is pretty social media. You 127 00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:46,280 Speaker 1: got to go to the place, you got to find 128 00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:53,840 Speaker 1: them out. What I'm hearing is that you're still very 129 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:59,320 Speaker 1: upset about being sexually rejected by your friends something brand Yes, 130 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:05,600 Speaker 1: would you do a threesome with man? I love so okay? 131 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:08,720 Speaker 1: So that Miranda needs to ask other people for validation 132 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:11,920 Speaker 1: for about threesome and she does it with a therapist 133 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 1: and then she does the wed shake to be sexy. 134 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:16,839 Speaker 1: It was one of those like when you're trying to 135 00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,199 Speaker 1: be sexy, when overly trying to be sexy and you're 136 00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:25,840 Speaker 1: obviously not doing great being thing. I've done this like 137 00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:33,160 Speaker 1: I'm being sexy and fall off a soul. So I 138 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,040 Speaker 1: guess you couldn't avoid a threesome because even if you're 139 00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:39,079 Speaker 1: the only person in the bed, someone has always been 140 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:43,120 Speaker 1: there before you. They're in the middle of having sex. 141 00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:47,440 Speaker 1: Big and Carrie. She started imagining the ex wife, which 142 00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:49,559 Speaker 1: I've done before, not the ex wife, but the eggs, 143 00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 1: and just like I can't compare. I give up. It 144 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:56,559 Speaker 1: is weird. It's one of those things where somebody can 145 00:09:56,559 --> 00:09:59,280 Speaker 1: be so close to you for so long, they know 146 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,600 Speaker 1: you so well, and then they move on and there 147 00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:04,920 Speaker 1: was someone else right, and then you start wondering, what 148 00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:07,079 Speaker 1: is this or what was that? Or how do they 149 00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:08,800 Speaker 1: do they do the same thing? Was that just me? 150 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:14,920 Speaker 1: What was the turning point? What went wrong? What it rights? 151 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:20,719 Speaker 1: Do you miss them? Yeah? You think? Do you think 152 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:27,960 Speaker 1: about them? I don't know who you are, but Ken 153 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:31,680 Speaker 1: and I love each other very much. Of course you do, 154 00:10:32,679 --> 00:10:36,400 Speaker 1: and we have an unshakable bond. Whatever it takes. I'm 155 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:40,080 Speaker 1: going to keep this marriage together. Good for you. Now, listen, Ruth, 156 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:42,840 Speaker 1: this was a huge mistake. It didn't mean anything. It 157 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:49,360 Speaker 1: was just sex exactly, and it being sexually adventuresome. We'll 158 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,800 Speaker 1: keep this marriage together. Then I am prepared to join 159 00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:59,800 Speaker 1: you with him in bed. So the one thing I 160 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:03,719 Speaker 1: would have a problem with, no, no, no, with this 161 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:07,040 Speaker 1: like sideline, because I I'm not gonna lie. Maybe I'm 162 00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:10,280 Speaker 1: too old fashioned when it comes to cheating and hurting 163 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:13,640 Speaker 1: an individual and and breaking someone's trust. I'm not cool 164 00:11:13,679 --> 00:11:18,800 Speaker 1: with that. And so this blase fair level of Sam 165 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: being like, yeah, I knew he was married, it's not 166 00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:24,080 Speaker 1: a big deal. And then having that come back to 167 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:26,640 Speaker 1: buy her in which he wants to be committed to 168 00:11:26,679 --> 00:11:29,839 Speaker 1: her Sam instead of the wife, and the wife is 169 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 1: like I'll do whatever, and Sam just feels inconvenienced by it. 170 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:36,600 Speaker 1: That's like, I'm not cool with this. This is not 171 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:40,079 Speaker 1: one thing because if I was cheated on, and the 172 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:43,000 Speaker 1: way they make ruth sounds so pitiful and it does 173 00:11:43,040 --> 00:11:45,320 Speaker 1: seem like it's her fault because Sam's a bigger star, 174 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:48,680 Speaker 1: and of course it's supposed to be centered around Sam. 175 00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:55,360 Speaker 1: It just felt a little disrespectful, like any wives in general. Whatever. 176 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:06,439 Speaker 1: Then Charlotte did the unsinkable Oh threesome, Charlotte, Oh three 177 00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 1: some Charlotte. Oh my god, Oh my god, she winked 178 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:12,839 Speaker 1: at me. Weins. I need to get out of it. 179 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 1: Did winks ever get you into? Yeah, baby, come over. 180 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:19,400 Speaker 1: I need to know that's a thing, because I feel 181 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 1: like I have never been winked at and felt like yes, yes, daddy, 182 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:25,720 Speaker 1: take me. And I'm so sorry I made that fright. 183 00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:31,000 Speaker 1: I mean, I've seen winks that are cute and affectionate, 184 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:33,880 Speaker 1: but it's never been like I usually wink at my 185 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:37,400 Speaker 1: friends to like implicate that I'm just joking or this 186 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:40,239 Speaker 1: is just a joke or whatever, but never like, hey, sexy, 187 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:45,839 Speaker 1: I'm winking at you. Can I join you? Oh? Woman 188 00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:48,720 Speaker 1: coming in asking to julize that this was her moment 189 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:51,440 Speaker 1: if she was going to take the plunge, it was 190 00:12:51,559 --> 00:12:59,640 Speaker 1: now or never, Charlotte says yes, Wow, threesome Charlotte awkward 191 00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:13,599 Speaker 1: sit together and bypassed, and Charlie gets pushed out, and 192 00:13:15,280 --> 00:13:19,400 Speaker 1: now we see Miranda in a bugle issous dress loving it. Hi. 193 00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:26,480 Speaker 1: Most of the women who answered our ad, well, they 194 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:31,080 Speaker 1: were you know, she answered an ad. Graces didn't exist 195 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:35,800 Speaker 1: at that point, right, It was all on newspersons. That's 196 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:39,959 Speaker 1: a good way to go. I wonder does this work? 197 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:44,439 Speaker 1: Has any of our listeners used either chrislist or or 198 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,960 Speaker 1: newspapers to meet up with someone? I know we are 199 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:50,839 Speaker 1: all in the age of dating apps, but I mean, 200 00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:54,720 Speaker 1: did this work out because people used it and there's 201 00:13:54,720 --> 00:14:17,679 Speaker 1: a level of trust. M H, All right, so you 202 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:22,440 Speaker 1: got it right? Ish scores high as the last time 203 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:28,920 Speaker 1: I would. But you were in the boat, okay, you 204 00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,360 Speaker 1: didn't see the affair thing coming. I know that's hard 205 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:35,960 Speaker 1: to predict. Um, so I would give you. I haven't 206 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:40,880 Speaker 1: given you any scores but in less than last one. 207 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:45,240 Speaker 1: But to be fair, yeah, this is a little complicated 208 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:48,080 Speaker 1: over the top. And by the way, the next episode 209 00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:50,800 Speaker 1: is gonna be fun. What did you think about this episode? Yeah? 210 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 1: I was again like I could really relate to the 211 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:57,160 Speaker 1: ex is and always thinking about like that's plagues me, 212 00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:01,280 Speaker 1: not only the exes but the futures bone stocks still see. 213 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,960 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I'll I don't do that. But I always 214 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,560 Speaker 1: think of like what if I when am I going 215 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,160 Speaker 1: to be invited the wedding? Am I gonna be invite 216 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,560 Speaker 1: the wedding? What am I going to do with a wedding? Like? Well, 217 00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:13,640 Speaker 1: I laugh because recently there was a techtok video about 218 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,520 Speaker 1: sign doing specific things and one of the big so 219 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,280 Speaker 1: like it was like people forgetting you exist and we'll 220 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,680 Speaker 1: cut you out and liberal was a big one and 221 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:23,320 Speaker 1: that is my sign. I was like, yeah, you don't 222 00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,000 Speaker 1: exist to me. If I can help it, at any point, 223 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,640 Speaker 1: I'll cut you out. And I think you should not exist. 224 00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:33,040 Speaker 1: And so seeing that, so I would never be invited 225 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:38,480 Speaker 1: anybody's wedding. That's funny. You're living my You're living my head. 226 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:41,880 Speaker 1: Canaid universe and Star Wars choosing, picking and choosing what 227 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:44,840 Speaker 1: exists and what doesn't exist. That's funny. I'm just saying, 228 00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,760 Speaker 1: just like for me, I need you not to exist, 229 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:49,960 Speaker 1: and if I can help it, then great. If not, 230 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:51,960 Speaker 1: I will find a way to cope and hopefully we 231 00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:53,760 Speaker 1: ended in a good route. If not, I'm just going 232 00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:56,760 Speaker 1: to ignore you. Yeah. I feel like most of my 233 00:15:56,800 --> 00:16:00,280 Speaker 1: relationships I had a pretty good as sad as it was, 234 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:03,040 Speaker 1: I had a pretty good break up last time, but 235 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:06,120 Speaker 1: most of them have ended with like never again, Shall 236 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:09,880 Speaker 1: I see you? Never again? Um? And that was more 237 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:14,080 Speaker 1: just why we broke up instead anything else. But I 238 00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:16,640 Speaker 1: do think about it. I do. It just feels odd, 239 00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:19,120 Speaker 1: like I said, to share so much of yourself with 240 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 1: somebody and then for them to not be around anymore. 241 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:26,360 Speaker 1: I will say, like, for me, part of my fear 242 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:29,120 Speaker 1: and being in relationships and when we break up, what 243 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:31,720 Speaker 1: can you use against me? Yeah? Like I have I 244 00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:33,280 Speaker 1: told you about these things about my friends, and then 245 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:34,920 Speaker 1: you're gonna go tell my friends this is what they 246 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:38,840 Speaker 1: said about you? Right? Yeah, I had that conversation with 247 00:16:38,920 --> 00:16:40,880 Speaker 1: my ex rights like, I feel like I've given you 248 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:44,440 Speaker 1: so much that you could destroy me with um and 249 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:48,800 Speaker 1: and he said like, no, I think he was basically saying, 250 00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,080 Speaker 1: what you think is a weakness is actually a strength, 251 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,560 Speaker 1: which was very nice with him. But I remember thinking like, 252 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,720 Speaker 1: I've just opened myself and I've shared all this with you, 253 00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:58,840 Speaker 1: and I've been so vulnerable, and now I feel like 254 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:01,040 Speaker 1: you could really wreck me if you wanted to. I mean, 255 00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:04,439 Speaker 1: that's what friendships could be too, like taking something and 256 00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:08,439 Speaker 1: using against you and hoping that they wouldn't and then 257 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,280 Speaker 1: but I have I've had friends who would like take 258 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 1: my worst twisted and tell someone else that's not what 259 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:16,639 Speaker 1: I meant. I don't understand what just happened. Um, But 260 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:19,240 Speaker 1: we've seen that in many A plot points. But it's 261 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,040 Speaker 1: true too, people can really take that. I've also thought 262 00:17:22,080 --> 00:17:25,160 Speaker 1: that physically, like if I wanted to murder you, you're 263 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:28,640 Speaker 1: to sleep in your bed, I could I like how 264 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:32,280 Speaker 1: you're looking at me as you say that you sleep 265 00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:37,679 Speaker 1: too lightly? Yeah, poison you could. I could easily be poisoned. 266 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:44,520 Speaker 1: That's a whole different we're not having right now plotting 267 00:17:44,640 --> 00:17:47,000 Speaker 1: my murder. Look, there are things I'm like, could I 268 00:17:47,119 --> 00:17:52,520 Speaker 1: destroy you? Yes? Could you destroy me? Yes? We have 269 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:57,520 Speaker 1: to figure out how and if I mean that's the 270 00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:59,520 Speaker 1: thing though, is I know we talked about this in 271 00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:02,920 Speaker 1: a recent episode, but so much of what I think 272 00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:06,000 Speaker 1: we worry about is I was worrying about it. So 273 00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:08,240 Speaker 1: like when when my ex said that, when he said, like, 274 00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:11,520 Speaker 1: I think what you see is a vulnerability as this strength, 275 00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:14,440 Speaker 1: I think he meant that, but to me it was 276 00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:16,920 Speaker 1: it's a weakness, Like to me, it feels that way, 277 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,160 Speaker 1: So I feel like he'll use it that way, even 278 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:22,119 Speaker 1: though I don't think we can trust people better than that. 279 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 1: But we know that sociopaths and narcissists exists, and so 280 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:27,440 Speaker 1: therefore that's a concern in itself. And we've seen it 281 00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:30,960 Speaker 1: in like work structures, and those are like who do 282 00:18:31,080 --> 00:18:32,920 Speaker 1: you trust? And I've met many of people who are like, 283 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,760 Speaker 1: I do not talk to them because they will use this, 284 00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,800 Speaker 1: this and this, And I was like, oh, damn, okay, 285 00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:38,920 Speaker 1: And I'm not even enough to think that it's not 286 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,119 Speaker 1: a thing. But then I'll watch people like you're right, 287 00:18:41,359 --> 00:18:45,000 Speaker 1: they sure did. So, like people are so guarded because 288 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,280 Speaker 1: they've been burned so often in workplace settings that it's 289 00:18:48,400 --> 00:18:51,879 Speaker 1: kind of interesting. But when it comes to sex in 290 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:54,480 Speaker 1: the city is a whole different level. A threesome is 291 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:57,359 Speaker 1: a whole different level. And yet not that polyamory is 292 00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,600 Speaker 1: not a thing, not that being in an open relationship 293 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,480 Speaker 1: is not good, and as long as you have communications, 294 00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:04,080 Speaker 1: it's delightful. But what does it come to when he 295 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,480 Speaker 1: said again, this could be one of those moments of like, yeah, 296 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:11,800 Speaker 1: you're being a little uh, closed off, judgmental for more 297 00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:15,159 Speaker 1: open relationships, they can and deal with threesoms and and 298 00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:17,520 Speaker 1: like can do it, but like the old school idea, 299 00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:21,080 Speaker 1: especially when it's driven by a patriarchal need to dominate 300 00:19:21,119 --> 00:19:24,320 Speaker 1: women and to say that they have knees that need 301 00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:28,200 Speaker 1: to be fulfilled. That's the dangerous conversation. That's the dangerous portion. 302 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:30,880 Speaker 1: And when we see the sexiest level of conversation when 303 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:33,119 Speaker 1: it comes to that, which is what they play on 304 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,120 Speaker 1: by being sex in the city, which is the very 305 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:40,680 Speaker 1: nineties early two thousands way to be. Doesn't accuse it 306 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:47,159 Speaker 1: so culturally probably not the best in this conversation, but 307 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:50,240 Speaker 1: does open up to the fact that he still has 308 00:19:50,280 --> 00:19:56,520 Speaker 1: a relationship with the next they're still game playing. Yeah, yeah, 309 00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,680 Speaker 1: I mean that would I guess they haven't known each 310 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:04,719 Speaker 1: other on carrying big But I actually didn't find out 311 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:09,040 Speaker 1: my dad at a first wife until like it was 312 00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:11,879 Speaker 1: a college like that's the first question I asked. I 313 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:14,120 Speaker 1: think that as we get older, my assumption as every 314 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:17,200 Speaker 1: someone you have been with someone you may probably marry 315 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:19,560 Speaker 1: someone tell me about that we had a long term 316 00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:23,240 Speaker 1: relationship with someone and up until this relationship that wasn't 317 00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,000 Speaker 1: me though, So I'm like, well, I guess that could 318 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:29,440 Speaker 1: be more of me. But is there? But he is there? 319 00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:33,280 Speaker 1: That's the question. The question I end up always talking 320 00:20:33,359 --> 00:20:35,120 Speaker 1: up with guys who just freshly got out of long 321 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:39,920 Speaker 1: term relationships. That is awful. Yeah, I mean that's something 322 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,520 Speaker 1: we should come back and talk about. It's kind of 323 00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:45,000 Speaker 1: rebound being the I was always a rebound. I was 324 00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:49,920 Speaker 1: always a secondary scened h really irritated me. Yeah, and 325 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:55,160 Speaker 1: it's hit myself name, oh for sure. Anyway, keep talking 326 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 1: about relationships because that is what sex in the City 327 00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:01,640 Speaker 1: does do well and that it brings conversation. But yeah, 328 00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:04,960 Speaker 1: let us know what your thoughts are. Yes, please do 329 00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:07,520 Speaker 1: you can emails that stuff need your mom stuff at 330 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:08,840 Speaker 1: I hurt me dot com. You can find us on 331 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:11,000 Speaker 1: Instagram at stuff I Never Told You or on Twitter 332 00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:13,720 Speaker 1: at mom Stuff Podcast. Thanks as always to our super 333 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,000 Speaker 1: producer Christina. Oh you know, we've never had a talk 334 00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:19,760 Speaker 1: with her about what her thoughts are. Christina. Yeah, Christina, 335 00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,960 Speaker 1: and thanks to you for listening stuff I never told 336 00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:25,719 Speaker 1: you this production of I Heart Radio. For more podcast 337 00:21:25,760 --> 00:21:27,680 Speaker 1: on my Heart Radio visity I Hear Radio app app 338 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:29,639 Speaker 1: a podcast wherever you listen to your favorite shows.