WEBVTT - #59 Etta 0:00:15.210 --> 0:00:27.370 Pushkin. Hello, I'd like to welcome to the show, Jackie Cove. Jackie. 0:00:28.370 --> 0:00:32.330 It's a new season. I'm with a new company, Pushkin Industries, 0:00:33.010 --> 0:00:34.729 and I thought it might be nice for you to, 0:00:35.010 --> 0:00:37.890 you know, tell everyone how much the show is meant 0:00:37.890 --> 0:00:38.089 to you. 0:00:38.930 --> 0:00:39.089 Do you? 0:00:39.090 --> 0:00:41.730 People look at my face right now we're on the telephone. 0:00:42.090 --> 0:00:43.409 Could you imagine what kind of look I have on 0:00:43.409 --> 0:00:43.730 my face? 0:00:43.810 --> 0:00:44.089 Right now? 0:00:44.610 --> 0:00:48.690 Ecstasy discussed Heavyweight is back, Mamala. They thought we were 0:00:48.730 --> 0:00:53.170 down for the count. But what's this? Oh oh with 0:00:53.250 --> 0:00:57.609 a right now left? Heavyweight's back, pushing it with Pushkin, Mamala, 0:00:57.930 --> 0:01:01.450 Bushkin Industries. I got okay, you go with that. 0:01:01.770 --> 0:01:03.690 Bye bye. 0:01:08.650 --> 0:01:14.290 From Bushkin Industries. I'm Jonathan Goldstein and this is Heavyweight 0:01:15.170 --> 0:01:23.250 today's episode. Eda, right after the. 0:01:23.170 --> 0:01:40.210 Break, all right, you're ready, you're rolling, You got levels, Mimei, mamomu. 0:01:40.810 --> 0:01:41.250 Okay go. 0:01:42.210 --> 0:01:45.650 This is Gregor. You might know him from such previous 0:01:45.690 --> 0:01:50.010 episodes as Gregor. Gregor is one of my oldest friends, 0:01:50.410 --> 0:01:53.050 and today he's coming to me with a problem. 0:01:53.370 --> 0:01:55.690 I'll take it from the top, Okay. So I have 0:01:55.770 --> 0:01:58.450 two parents, Milton and Eda. 0:01:58.850 --> 0:02:02.650 Edda and Milton are both pushing ninety and Gregor's problem 0:02:02.970 --> 0:02:05.250 is that they refuse to move out of their house. 0:02:06.250 --> 0:02:09.850 It's the same three story Victorian Gregor grew up. He 0:02:09.970 --> 0:02:12.970 was twelve when the family first moved in. He still 0:02:13.010 --> 0:02:16.369 remembers the excitement as they unloaded boxes from the moving 0:02:16.450 --> 0:02:18.970 truck or moving trucks. 0:02:21.690 --> 0:02:23.730 You know, normal people move with like a big giant 0:02:23.810 --> 0:02:26.130 eighteen wheeler moving truck. I believe when we moved we 0:02:26.170 --> 0:02:27.570 had six moving. 0:02:27.290 --> 0:02:32.130 Trucks, one for the family's belongings, the other five for 0:02:32.210 --> 0:02:37.650 the collections. Some people collect coins, some people collect comic books. 0:02:38.210 --> 0:02:41.530 Gregor's mother, Etta, collects collections. 0:02:42.290 --> 0:02:46.970 She has like maybe two hundred egg beaters, antique egg beaters. 0:02:47.530 --> 0:02:49.970 She has you know what a bisk nodter is. 0:02:50.690 --> 0:02:50.889 No. 0:02:52.090 --> 0:02:55.530 In occupied Japan, people bought these little figurines where the 0:02:55.610 --> 0:02:56.730 head would wobble back. 0:02:56.570 --> 0:02:59.090 And forth like a bubble headed doll, something like that. 0:02:59.370 --> 0:03:01.770 Anyway, she probably has two thousand bisc mounters. 0:03:02.410 --> 0:03:05.930 Then there are the nineteenth century weaving looms, the handmade baskets, 0:03:06.090 --> 0:03:10.850 the medieval scythes. Eta airlic Is artist and her collections 0:03:10.890 --> 0:03:14.810 are the source of her inspiration. Edis's beauty in everything 0:03:15.170 --> 0:03:18.890 and in her hands, everything becomes art. She'll sculpt lint 0:03:18.930 --> 0:03:21.850 from the dryer. She'll put googly eyes on a splatter 0:03:21.930 --> 0:03:23.090 of dried bird poop. 0:03:23.610 --> 0:03:27.450 My mother has been unbelievably prolific in making art for 0:03:27.490 --> 0:03:30.450 like the last thirty five years, to a degree where 0:03:30.970 --> 0:03:33.609 now the living room is like full to the brim 0:03:33.610 --> 0:03:35.890 with a million pieces of art, and every week she 0:03:35.930 --> 0:03:37.810 probably makes five or ten more pieces of art. 0:03:38.770 --> 0:03:41.570 None of this would be a problem except that a large, 0:03:41.570 --> 0:03:46.410 cluttered house is becoming increasingly dangerous for Gregor's elderly parents. 0:03:47.450 --> 0:03:50.250 I fear the more conventional fears. I fear my mother 0:03:50.290 --> 0:03:52.690 falling down a flight of stairs, or my father. I mean, 0:03:52.690 --> 0:03:54.410 there's all kinds of dark things that can happen in 0:03:54.410 --> 0:03:55.610 a house full of staircases. 0:03:56.490 --> 0:03:59.130 And so Gregor wants to move his parents into a 0:03:59.170 --> 0:04:03.050 smaller apartment, something more manageable. That's his plan. 0:04:03.850 --> 0:04:08.330 Yeah, that's his plan. But that's not my plan. This 0:04:08.610 --> 0:04:13.610 is eda The practical thing is, we can't be in 0:04:13.610 --> 0:04:15.490 the house too much longer. I'm eighty eight. 0:04:15.690 --> 0:04:17.810 Yeah, but to move out. 0:04:17.690 --> 0:04:20.690 Of the house isn't simply a question of selling the furniture. 0:04:21.050 --> 0:04:25.729 It's my god, what do we do with all this? 0:04:26.690 --> 0:04:30.169 All this all the collections is what's keeping Eta in 0:04:30.210 --> 0:04:33.610 the house. And of all her many collections, of all 0:04:33.650 --> 0:04:37.249 her milking stools and antique rolling pins, it's her collection 0:04:37.330 --> 0:04:41.130 of fragile, colorful bottles that is perhaps the biggest impediment 0:04:41.210 --> 0:04:46.130 to moving. By Gregor's estimate, Eta has thousands wine bottles, 0:04:46.210 --> 0:04:50.529 perfume bottles, all decanters, bottles washed up from the bottom 0:04:50.529 --> 0:04:54.289 of the ocean. As well as being an artist, Eta 0:04:54.369 --> 0:04:57.490 is a Buddhist and her bottles are not just bottles 0:04:57.729 --> 0:05:01.489 but a series of meditations. Because on each of the bottles, 0:05:01.650 --> 0:05:05.969 in fancy fonds and careful calligraphy, Eta places a message 0:05:06.089 --> 0:05:07.969 in the form of a zen like riddle. 0:05:09.289 --> 0:05:15.010 Noose to titropuce and madly dance upon it. 0:05:15.049 --> 0:05:15.849 Isn't it gorgeous? 0:05:15.969 --> 0:05:16.489 Very nice? 0:05:16.570 --> 0:05:19.489 But how's about this one? It's a black popple with 0:05:19.609 --> 0:05:25.130 gold calligraphy, and it has the first letter shows a breath, 0:05:25.330 --> 0:05:27.729 somebody blowing a breath. Do you see it? 0:05:27.729 --> 0:05:29.770 It really does look like a breath is blowing. That's 0:05:29.770 --> 0:05:30.289 by design. 0:05:30.409 --> 0:05:32.770 There you go, there you go. You want me to 0:05:32.810 --> 0:05:33.969 give that away for nothing? 0:05:37.570 --> 0:05:41.770 Other inscriptions are stop schlepping your old being into the future, 0:05:42.369 --> 0:05:47.050 or we cling to illusions of control. After hearing a few, 0:05:47.609 --> 0:05:51.010 I start to recognize a theme. All the bottles bear 0:05:51.089 --> 0:05:55.369 messages imploring one to let go. Yet Eda is incapable 0:05:55.369 --> 0:05:58.529 of letting go of the very bottles doing the imploring, 0:05:59.369 --> 0:06:02.250 or much of anything else. There is a little bit 0:06:02.289 --> 0:06:04.570 of a paradox, or there's something to kind of be 0:06:04.849 --> 0:06:05.449 struggling with. 0:06:05.529 --> 0:06:10.570 Then you're very, very sharp. That is exactly see, exactly true. 0:06:11.289 --> 0:06:16.610 These works would talk about being stuck with the grasping 0:06:16.770 --> 0:06:19.849 level I suffer from that. 0:06:21.770 --> 0:06:22.929 I could leave tomorrow. 0:06:24.010 --> 0:06:28.249 This is Gregor's dad, Milt. If the taxi pulled up 0:06:28.330 --> 0:06:30.250 right now, you would you would jump in. 0:06:30.450 --> 0:06:31.210 I'm ready to go. 0:06:31.330 --> 0:06:32.210 Yeah, I'll stop you there. 0:06:32.250 --> 0:06:33.810 He's never taken a tax in his life. 0:06:33.849 --> 0:06:35.169 But if I pulled up that. 0:06:37.289 --> 0:06:41.969 Uber duber so I don't get attached to furniture and 0:06:42.089 --> 0:06:44.330 bottles and stuff, I'll. 0:06:44.089 --> 0:06:47.409 Just reinforce that point that while my father made positive 0:06:47.409 --> 0:06:49.849 that he's a Taoist and not attached to anything, he 0:06:49.969 --> 0:06:53.650 is very much complicit lmentlessly bringing home the raw material 0:06:53.770 --> 0:06:56.929 to which my mother, you know, turns the art out. 0:06:57.210 --> 0:07:02.849 When was the last time you brought something home melt yesterday? 0:07:03.049 --> 0:07:05.690 I'm always interested in what she's doing, and I often 0:07:05.810 --> 0:07:09.049 find the raw materials walking around in the woods or anywhere, 0:07:09.210 --> 0:07:12.890 fine stuff. Her only requirement is if I find something, 0:07:12.890 --> 0:07:16.489 it has to have what she calls a charm. 0:07:16.730 --> 0:07:20.490 As for Melt, what he's charmed by, exceedingly charmed by, 0:07:21.090 --> 0:07:24.330 is that a Milt is a poet, and after over 0:07:24.450 --> 0:07:27.730 sixty years of marriage, he still writes poems about her, 0:07:28.210 --> 0:07:31.930 rhapsodizing about the way she creates art or cooks, or 0:07:31.970 --> 0:07:35.290 the way she dances. Milt says he can watch Eda 0:07:35.369 --> 0:07:38.530 dance all night. He just doesn't understand her being so 0:07:38.730 --> 0:07:40.330 chained to her belongings. 0:07:41.010 --> 0:07:41.650 I'm stuck. 0:07:42.890 --> 0:07:46.610 But I am not coming up with the solution that's 0:07:46.650 --> 0:07:52.890 any better, am I? Yeah, except dying, And that's not 0:07:52.970 --> 0:07:57.490 a solution. No, it's not a solution for greg He's 0:07:57.610 --> 0:07:59.010 left holding the whole. 0:07:58.770 --> 0:08:03.249 Thing of Milton. At his three kids, Gregor is perhaps 0:08:03.290 --> 0:08:06.170 the one most ready to serve the child his parents 0:08:06.250 --> 0:08:08.250 handed to do list when he comes to visit. 0:08:08.929 --> 0:08:12.210 I mean, he talks me, and that's because he has 0:08:12.369 --> 0:08:16.770 meanness in him. I'm not saying he doesn't, but he's 0:08:16.929 --> 0:08:20.410 also a very kind, giving, generous, loving person. 0:08:20.530 --> 0:08:21.050 Yes he is. 0:08:21.330 --> 0:08:33.050 Yeah, Yeah, don't tell him, I said, so. 0:08:31.170 --> 0:08:34.570 In action is a choice not doing anything. Something's bound 0:08:34.570 --> 0:08:38.250 to happen sooner or later, and just sort of watch 0:08:38.370 --> 0:08:41.250 the secondhand sweep around the clock face until somebody's dead 0:08:41.810 --> 0:08:45.930 is the most passive and weakest possible way to exist. 0:08:46.010 --> 0:08:49.810 And it just feels like, you know, the Damoclean Sword 0:08:49.930 --> 0:08:52.130 of mortality is coming, and all we're going to do 0:08:52.170 --> 0:08:54.170 is sit here and watch Rachel Maddow until it cuts 0:08:54.170 --> 0:08:54.690 our head off. 0:08:56.930 --> 0:09:00.490 And so, because Eda can't let go, Gregor wants my 0:09:00.650 --> 0:09:04.450 help in pulling off a most extravagant workaround, one that 0:09:04.530 --> 0:09:07.650 will allow Eda to both keep her stuff and still 0:09:07.650 --> 0:09:10.770 move out. It's a plan of action that Gregor wants 0:09:10.810 --> 0:09:11.610 to present to her. 0:09:12.450 --> 0:09:15.090 What if you don't get rid of your possessions and 0:09:15.130 --> 0:09:17.130 we make a museum of your stuff? 0:09:20.450 --> 0:09:23.730 Gregor explains to me the details. It seems that in 0:09:23.770 --> 0:09:26.690 the nineteen sixties, Etta and Milt about a two hundred 0:09:26.770 --> 0:09:30.250 year old farmhouse with no running water or indoor plumbing. 0:09:30.890 --> 0:09:34.050 Gregor's plan is to convert the barn into the Eta 0:09:34.090 --> 0:09:39.130 b airlike museum, convincing one's mother to downsize by way 0:09:39.170 --> 0:09:43.050 of a feral farmhouse museum that by Gregor's own admission 0:09:43.370 --> 0:09:46.210 is probably a breeding ground for the haunt of virus. 0:09:46.530 --> 0:09:50.450 Has all the makings of a classic Kakammi scheme. But 0:09:50.570 --> 0:10:09.370 this is just the beginning for his plan, and to 0:10:09.410 --> 0:10:12.770 build a museum to work, Gregor will need his siblings 0:10:12.810 --> 0:10:16.929 on board, so, as is emotional envoy, I begin by 0:10:16.930 --> 0:10:21.010 phoning his sister Lexi. Lexi is the level headed one 0:10:21.050 --> 0:10:23.290 of the three, and I want to get her read 0:10:23.410 --> 0:10:26.170 on the plan. I mean, is it realistic that he'll 0:10:26.170 --> 0:10:29.650 be able to turn the barn into a museum like that? 0:10:35.890 --> 0:10:38.930 Perhaps this plan is a bit half baked, but I 0:10:38.970 --> 0:10:42.050 figure I might have more luck getting Gregor's brother Dmitri 0:10:42.210 --> 0:10:45.170 on board. Dmitri has never been afraid of a scheme 0:10:45.210 --> 0:10:49.730 that runs a little pink on the inside. So I 0:10:49.730 --> 0:10:52.290 give him a call. We haven't spoken since I moved 0:10:52.290 --> 0:10:56.210 from New York, where Dmitri lives, to Minnesota. 0:10:56.410 --> 0:10:59.850 I hate to see a Minneapolis area code when you call. 0:11:00.410 --> 0:11:01.690 It makes me sad. 0:11:02.170 --> 0:11:03.930 Your business doesn't bring you to Minnesota. 0:11:03.970 --> 0:11:06.850 I'm guessing it does sometimes. I interviewed Prince for a 0:11:06.930 --> 0:11:09.610 cover story. Ever earned one may be very trap both prints. 0:11:09.650 --> 0:11:10.330 He's very touching. 0:11:10.570 --> 0:11:14.170 Dmitri is a personal trainer who's kickboxed his way across Thailand. 0:11:14.570 --> 0:11:17.210 He's also a journalist who interviews celebrities. 0:11:17.330 --> 0:11:19.850 So I went there, waited all day for the interview. 0:11:19.890 --> 0:11:22.770 And a musician who had a song go platinum six 0:11:22.850 --> 0:11:24.410 times in Belgium. 0:11:23.970 --> 0:11:25.250 And he was like, hey, you want to jam and 0:11:25.290 --> 0:11:26.410 I was like okay. 0:11:26.610 --> 0:11:28.730 So I wound up actually jamming with Larry Grant and 0:11:28.770 --> 0:11:34.730 Prince for like twenty minutes. 0:11:35.130 --> 0:11:36.970 What that was one sence. 0:11:39.090 --> 0:11:41.850 Before Dmitri you can launch into his next sentence, I 0:11:41.930 --> 0:11:45.449 jump in. So your brother Gregor. 0:11:45.370 --> 0:11:46.250 I'm familiar with him. 0:11:46.530 --> 0:11:49.650 He has his plan, which maybe you're also familiar with. 0:11:50.410 --> 0:11:54.170 When I'm finished rehashing Gregor's museum plan, Dmitri offers a 0:11:54.210 --> 0:11:56.050 laundry list of issues. 0:11:55.930 --> 0:11:59.770 Sons of getting Lemez's walking out of your part of 0:11:59.810 --> 0:12:02.010 the barn because it's high grassed, a lot of deer 0:12:03.090 --> 0:12:04.130 getting poison ivy. 0:12:04.290 --> 0:12:06.530 So there's also like a horrible black mold. Because as 0:12:06.530 --> 0:12:07.970 you know, the farmhouse burned down. 0:12:08.170 --> 0:12:10.770 My I'll buy it baker friend THEO stayed there and 0:12:10.810 --> 0:12:12.930 lit a fire in the roof and the whole house 0:12:12.970 --> 0:12:13.450 burned down in the. 0:12:13.450 --> 0:12:15.850 Wad and along with his friend Theo's trouble. There was 0:12:15.890 --> 0:12:18.890 also his friend Sonem's trouble in that cursed place. 0:12:19.410 --> 0:12:21.490 My friend, who spent twenty five years as a Buddhist 0:12:21.490 --> 0:12:23.210 monk under the dolly Lema, had to use a broom 0:12:23.290 --> 0:12:25.290 to fight off a very large raccoon that was. 0:12:25.210 --> 0:12:26.929 In the house and was like growling at us and 0:12:27.250 --> 0:12:29.130 like his harrifind. 0:12:29.290 --> 0:12:32.690 But for Dimitri, even more daunting than the rabid raccoons 0:12:32.970 --> 0:12:36.210 is changing his mother's mind on the matter. Whenever he's 0:12:36.250 --> 0:12:39.770 trying to clear space in his parents' home, it refills overnight, 0:12:40.330 --> 0:12:44.730 suggesting Eda's problem can't be solved by physical means. Instead, 0:12:45.090 --> 0:12:47.050 he thinks the problem has to be attacked at its 0:12:47.090 --> 0:12:50.610 psychological root. She needs to learn how to let go, 0:12:51.410 --> 0:12:54.170 and for this Dmitri has just the solution. 0:12:54.850 --> 0:12:58.170 Well, maybe hypnosis. 0:13:00.090 --> 0:13:02.290 It stopped her from smoking, which is probably a more 0:13:02.330 --> 0:13:05.410 powerful psychological and physical addiction than collecting things. 0:13:06.290 --> 0:13:09.010 Eda was a packadet smoker, a habit she hung on 0:13:09.370 --> 0:13:10.530 for nearly thirty years. 0:13:10.890 --> 0:13:13.370 Our friend, who was a hypnotist, said I can hypnotize you, 0:13:13.410 --> 0:13:15.930 and she went into the session thinking this isn't gonna work. 0:13:16.210 --> 0:13:18.210 The whole time the hypnosis was going on. She was like, 0:13:18.210 --> 0:13:20.490 this isn't working, This isn't working, and then she walked 0:13:20.490 --> 0:13:24.570 out and never smoked again. He was an interesting person too. 0:13:24.570 --> 0:13:25.650 His name is Saul Feldstein. 0:13:25.770 --> 0:13:28.210 He actually had one of his eyeballs was like hanging 0:13:28.250 --> 0:13:30.210 out of his face, and like it was like a 0:13:30.250 --> 0:13:33.170 sort of early commune hippie thing, and like. 0:13:33.250 --> 0:13:36.569 Having grown up on TV sitcoms of the nineteen seventies, 0:13:36.930 --> 0:13:40.290 I'm well aware of the power of hypnosis. 0:13:39.730 --> 0:13:40.610 Hanging out of his face. 0:13:40.770 --> 0:13:44.210 Hypnosis gave Fred Flintstone the self control to stop beating 0:13:44.210 --> 0:13:48.690 Brontosaurus Berger Communie. It gave the Fonds the confidence that 0:13:48.810 --> 0:13:52.410 jumped Snake Canyon on his motorcycle his eyeballs. As a boy, 0:13:52.730 --> 0:13:55.050 I always wondered what it would feel like to have 0:13:55.210 --> 0:13:58.370 my full potential unlocked through the hypnotic arts. 0:13:58.170 --> 0:14:00.850 Hanging out of his face, And he was very successful 0:14:00.850 --> 0:14:01.850 as a hypnotist. 0:14:02.410 --> 0:14:08.650 Wow. Unlike building a museum, hypnosis requires neither time effort. 0:14:09.210 --> 0:14:12.490 Are those awful stanchions that snap back with that loud 0:14:12.650 --> 0:14:15.930 thwacking sound that make everyone turn around and stare at you. 0:14:17.010 --> 0:14:20.370 Fully convinced that Saul Feldstein is the solution to all 0:14:20.370 --> 0:14:23.770 of our problems and that museums belong in a museum. 0:14:24.410 --> 0:14:26.250 Dimitri and I say our goodbyes. 0:14:33.450 --> 0:14:37.250 We're slating in. On part two, Johnny discusses post talking 0:14:37.290 --> 0:14:38.610 to Dmitri. Here we go. 0:14:39.570 --> 0:14:42.450 I need to tell Gregor that I like Dmitri's idea 0:14:42.570 --> 0:14:45.610 much better than his. But I need to tread lightly 0:14:46.210 --> 0:14:49.370 from Cain and Abel to Stephen and Alec Baldwin. I 0:14:49.450 --> 0:14:53.050 know how competitive brothers can be, and unlike the Lord 0:14:53.530 --> 0:14:57.090 or Alexander Ray Baldwin Senior, I don't want to be 0:14:57.130 --> 0:15:02.690 seen playing favorites. Do you think you're like hypnotism has 0:15:02.690 --> 0:15:04.930 a role in this, Well, I hear. 0:15:04.730 --> 0:15:06.490 That, like your voice went up in octave when we 0:15:06.530 --> 0:15:09.090 started talking about hypnotism and you got excited about hypnotism. 0:15:09.410 --> 0:15:11.490 Well, Dimitri seemed to think that it would that it 0:15:11.530 --> 0:15:12.010 could help. 0:15:13.210 --> 0:15:14.690 Okay, so the two of you should go see a 0:15:14.730 --> 0:15:15.250 movie together. 0:15:16.450 --> 0:15:20.650 Going to movies is Gregor and my thing. Clearly I'm 0:15:20.690 --> 0:15:24.890 arousing some jealousy. I need to keep my arguments away 0:15:24.890 --> 0:15:28.570 from Dimitri and grounded in the merits of hypnotism. This 0:15:28.650 --> 0:15:33.090 whole barn thing as the symptom but through hypnosis. 0:15:32.370 --> 0:15:34.530 Why are you saying it with like the weird accent 0:15:34.650 --> 0:15:36.170 on the word hypnosis. 0:15:36.370 --> 0:15:40.010 I mean, do you think that hypnotism has something to 0:15:40.050 --> 0:15:40.650 offer here? 0:15:41.450 --> 0:15:45.050 My short answer would be absolutely not. I think it's 0:15:45.090 --> 0:15:52.690 a waste of time. Hypnosis, hypnosis, hypnosis. 0:15:52.970 --> 0:15:54.010 Hi, Johnny, how are you. 0:15:54.330 --> 0:15:54.930 Hey, Dimitri? 0:15:55.170 --> 0:15:55.330 Hi? 0:15:56.290 --> 0:15:58.610 I've got your brother Gregor on the line with me. 0:15:59.290 --> 0:16:00.370 We've met, Hi. 0:16:00.450 --> 0:16:00.930 How are you? 0:16:01.730 --> 0:16:03.250 Can you make the case to your brother? 0:16:04.410 --> 0:16:04.650 Sure? 0:16:04.690 --> 0:16:06.410 I just think that you know there's no harm, there's 0:16:06.410 --> 0:16:09.650 certainly no nothing to lose. It takes fifteen or twenty minutes, 0:16:09.650 --> 0:16:13.010 and she's proven that she's very susceptible to hypnotic suggestions, 0:16:13.010 --> 0:16:13.850 so why not try it? 0:16:14.770 --> 0:16:17.210 I agree with all those points. My main feeling is 0:16:17.250 --> 0:16:19.970 that getting someone to stop a behavior like smoking is 0:16:20.090 --> 0:16:22.930 much much easier than getting someone to change their personality, 0:16:23.290 --> 0:16:25.050 which is harder to hypnotize someone out. 0:16:24.970 --> 0:16:28.690 Of That may be true, I wouldn't disgrew there, swept 0:16:28.730 --> 0:16:32.050 up in a wave of brotherly bonamy. I decide it's 0:16:32.090 --> 0:16:36.370 a safe space to cautiously share my one secret boyhood longing, 0:16:37.050 --> 0:16:39.770 and along the way I could get hypnotized that as 0:16:39.770 --> 0:16:43.250 something too. Yeah, A lot of stuff, yeah, and immediately 0:16:43.410 --> 0:16:45.610 regret it. What do you mean a lot of stuff? 0:16:46.210 --> 0:16:47.970 I mean, that's a smug smile. They could work on. 0:16:48.090 --> 0:16:49.610 We could give you a whole brand new thing where 0:16:49.650 --> 0:16:51.050 you're like super charming all the. 0:16:51.010 --> 0:16:53.530 Time, being more able to look people in the eye. 0:16:53.450 --> 0:16:55.210 Not always hide behind a microphone. 0:16:55.690 --> 0:16:57.250 Actually, you know there is all joking aside. 0:16:57.250 --> 0:16:59.250 There is a new hypnosis that works on what's called 0:16:59.290 --> 0:17:01.890 voluntary baldness syndrome, where they realize that a lot of 0:17:01.970 --> 0:17:04.129 men are sort of doing it on purpose. 0:17:04.210 --> 0:17:06.330 Why would someone do that on purpose? 0:17:07.850 --> 0:17:08.330 Which is it? 0:17:08.330 --> 0:17:10.290 It turns out that that hair loss is more of 0:17:10.330 --> 0:17:13.649 like an act of willful insolence often and a cry 0:17:13.730 --> 0:17:14.010 for peace. 0:17:14.169 --> 0:17:15.169 I used to love my hair. 0:17:16.449 --> 0:17:17.770 Well, if you loved it so much, why did you 0:17:17.889 --> 0:17:18.489 get rid of it? 0:17:18.490 --> 0:17:21.810 First of all, I find the defensive and Gregor chime 0:17:21.889 --> 0:17:24.010 in here because I'm sure you're equally offended. 0:17:24.409 --> 0:17:26.129 Now, Dimitri used to be bald as an egg and 0:17:26.169 --> 0:17:26.970 then he willed it back. 0:17:29.050 --> 0:17:30.249 I think you you did at the same time with 0:17:30.330 --> 0:17:30.650 my mother. 0:17:30.770 --> 0:17:32.649 We can get a two for one deal package deal. 0:17:33.090 --> 0:17:34.850 I'm just saying it's science. If you read the New 0:17:34.850 --> 0:17:38.090 England Journal inmentivis. 0:17:38.810 --> 0:17:42.530 With Gregor and Dimitri aligned in friends again. At my expense, 0:17:43.050 --> 0:17:46.090 I set out in search of the one eyed hippie hypnotist, 0:17:46.409 --> 0:17:50.330 Saul Feldstein. But it turns out Saul died in twenty 0:17:50.409 --> 0:17:53.690 nineteen at the age of ninety two. So I reach 0:17:53.730 --> 0:17:56.810 out to other hypnotists, all of whom pretty much hang 0:17:56.889 --> 0:18:00.770 up on me once I explain the project. So hypnotism 0:18:00.850 --> 0:18:04.009 is out, the museum is out. I'm stuck with my 0:18:04.090 --> 0:18:07.450 crap personality, and Edta is stuck with her house full 0:18:07.490 --> 0:18:11.850 of crab and Gregor is still at an impasse. But 0:18:11.929 --> 0:18:16.330 things are about to change coming up after the break 0:18:16.889 --> 0:18:19.769 Ata's big night. You know what that guy says to me. 0:18:20.490 --> 0:18:23.290 Just now, This guy told me that I was beautiful. 0:18:24.129 --> 0:18:37.649 You are what's going on yet? 0:18:39.689 --> 0:18:42.169 Gregor tells me that Edda has been offered a show 0:18:42.209 --> 0:18:45.850 at the Carter Burden Gallery in Manhattan. Edda is an 0:18:45.850 --> 0:18:49.409 outsider artist, so the offer of her own solo exhibition 0:18:49.609 --> 0:18:52.649 feels like finally, at the age of eighty eight, she's 0:18:52.649 --> 0:18:57.209 being invited inside. The show with its formal invitations and 0:18:57.330 --> 0:19:01.530 co check, feels like validation. It's the kind of opportunity 0:19:01.730 --> 0:19:04.889 Edda has always hoped for, and for Gregor, it feels 0:19:04.889 --> 0:19:07.649 like an opportunity for her pieces to find good homes 0:19:07.970 --> 0:19:12.449 outside her home. The show opens on March twenty first, 0:19:12.490 --> 0:19:15.689 twenty nineteen. Gregor and I make a plan to speak 0:19:15.770 --> 0:19:18.129 the morning after so we can tell me how it went. 0:19:19.090 --> 0:19:22.010 When we speak, what Gregor tells me is that things 0:19:22.050 --> 0:19:26.410 that night took a wild turn. Do you want to explain? 0:19:27.530 --> 0:19:27.889 Sure. 0:19:28.129 --> 0:19:31.250 I flew into town from my mom's art opening. Okay, 0:19:31.290 --> 0:19:33.969 we're here at the art opening. It's a pretty good drought. 0:19:34.889 --> 0:19:36.609 Everyone's eating wine and cheese. 0:19:36.970 --> 0:19:39.529 And but it's so loud. 0:19:40.889 --> 0:19:43.369 It was almost like a cartoon version of my mom's 0:19:43.409 --> 0:19:46.850 success story. And that like some stranger guy came up, 0:19:47.010 --> 0:19:55.289 was like, you're a beautiful woman, utiful. Her ego was 0:19:55.290 --> 0:19:57.250 buffed from many sides. Everything going great. 0:19:57.530 --> 0:19:58.170 Oh. 0:20:00.330 --> 0:20:03.170 Gregor's dad, Milt, on the other hand, wasn't having as 0:20:03.169 --> 0:20:05.889 good a time. He spent most of the evening in 0:20:05.970 --> 0:20:09.570 the corner nibbling on crackers. At the end the night, 0:20:09.649 --> 0:20:12.330 Gregor approached him. 0:20:11.810 --> 0:20:13.169 Oh, father, let'd you make it up? 0:20:13.570 --> 0:20:16.289 Oh it's very nice. 0:20:16.609 --> 0:20:20.570 A little bit exhausting, he seemed like, even though he 0:20:20.649 --> 0:20:23.129 sometimes talks in a quiet voice, he was especially quiet, 0:20:23.169 --> 0:20:25.169 like I could hardly hear him. 0:20:27.409 --> 0:20:30.689 On the drive home, Milt conked out When the family 0:20:30.730 --> 0:20:33.969 couldn't rouse him, they realized he wasn't just sleeping, but 0:20:34.050 --> 0:20:39.489 completely unconscious. Eda began yelling, wailing Milt's name. He was 0:20:39.570 --> 0:20:42.530 driven to the hospital, where the EMTs lifted him onto 0:20:42.530 --> 0:20:45.889 a gurney. The doctors thought he might be having a stroke, 0:20:46.209 --> 0:20:49.370 but they couldn't say for sure. In the waiting room, 0:20:49.490 --> 0:20:52.169 Eda turned to Gregor and said, you might as well 0:20:52.330 --> 0:20:56.850 order the dumpsters right now, meaning you win empty out 0:20:56.889 --> 0:20:59.810 the house because of Milt isn't coming back to it, 0:21:00.090 --> 0:21:06.209 That's it. How do you know when the Democlean sword 0:21:06.250 --> 0:21:10.289 of mortality isn't just dangling above you but actually falling? 0:21:11.050 --> 0:21:12.729 How do you know when it's time to pick up 0:21:12.770 --> 0:21:17.689 the remote, turn off Rachel Maddow and finally act the 0:21:17.810 --> 0:21:21.369 night a milestone in Edda's career was meant to symbolize 0:21:21.369 --> 0:21:24.570 the turning point, and it was just not the kind 0:21:24.649 --> 0:21:28.569 she was hoping for. Milton was eventually sent home from 0:21:28.609 --> 0:21:32.090 the hospital, but its clap signaled a change for Gregor too. 0:21:33.050 --> 0:21:36.769 For so long he'd been saying, maybe it's time, but 0:21:36.889 --> 0:21:48.010 maybe it was time to stop saying maybe Hello, he Hi, 0:21:48.129 --> 0:21:49.689 it's Gregor and Jonathan. 0:21:50.490 --> 0:21:52.930 Oh, and I thought this was a scam call. 0:21:53.010 --> 0:21:53.689 How do you like that? 0:21:53.850 --> 0:21:54.970 How are you well? 0:21:55.010 --> 0:21:56.249 I wouldn't be so sure. It's not. 0:21:56.530 --> 0:22:00.169 We haven't finished the call yet, right, So what's the bitch? 0:22:00.970 --> 0:22:04.209 Johnny wanted to dredge up a bunch of painful family issues. 0:22:04.649 --> 0:22:07.330 Oh sure, why not? The painfuler the better. 0:22:08.169 --> 0:22:10.249 I want to talk with about the night of the 0:22:10.369 --> 0:22:12.850 art opening and the way it affected our thinking about 0:22:12.889 --> 0:22:13.850 remaining in the house. 0:22:14.929 --> 0:22:18.169 I won't be able to stay here alone. Either I 0:22:18.250 --> 0:22:21.850 will become ill or Milt will become ill, and I 0:22:21.889 --> 0:22:26.209 need somebody to help me. There is a new little 0:22:26.290 --> 0:22:28.810 piece in my head that says things are going. 0:22:28.689 --> 0:22:32.330