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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEVARVIFM dot com and

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Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter.

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Speaker 2: We could be reading.

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Speaker 1: Your letter live on the air, just like we're going

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Speaker 1: to read this one right here, right now, and you

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Speaker 1: never know, it could be yours.

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Speaker 3: It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on type.

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Speaker 3: We got it for you here it is strawberry.

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Speaker 1: Let us thank you, nephew. Subject the joke is on

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Speaker 1: me this time. Dear Stephen Shirley, maybe you can help me.

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Speaker 1: My wife and I have been married for six years

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Speaker 1: and we have one daughter. I'm thirty two and she's thirty.

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Speaker 1: We were young when we started dating, so we had

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Speaker 1: a few three ways and we went to the strip

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Speaker 1: club together all of the time. We both got saved

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Speaker 1: right after we got married, but I still got chills

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Speaker 1: when I heard my single friend talking about being with

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Speaker 1: two girls at one time like a dummy. I decided

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Speaker 1: to check in with my wife to see if she

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Speaker 1: wanted to go to the strip club with me and

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Speaker 1: a group of our friends. She said that she's not

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Speaker 1: going nor am I. I didn't want an argument, so

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Speaker 1: I didn't push it. I went anyway, and I told

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Speaker 1: her I was playing cards with friends. She found out

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Speaker 1: from one of the girls that dates one of my friends.

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Speaker 1: She told me that if I want to play, then

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Speaker 1: it's on. I told her that women can't do what

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Speaker 1: men do, and I put my foot down and I

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Speaker 1: said that there's nothing wrong with going to the strip club.

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Speaker 1: She said fine, and that was it. I went a

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Speaker 1: few more times and I told her before I left.

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Speaker 1: She never said a word, so I thought it was cool.

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Speaker 1: Her birthday came around and she told me she was

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Speaker 1: going to Palm Springs with her sorority sisters. It was

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Speaker 1: a quick trip, so I was cool with it. A

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Speaker 1: week later, I found out that they rented a sprinter

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Speaker 1: and hired two male strippers to entertain them on the ride.

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Speaker 1: She and four other married women went. She was so

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Speaker 1: happy to admit that she lied to me. She won't

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Speaker 1: tell me where she stayed or where the two strippers stayed.

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Speaker 1: She told me that she doesn't question me, so she

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Speaker 1: wants the same grace. Okay, so the joke is on

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Speaker 1: me this time. This is not how I want my

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Speaker 1: marriage to go. How do we rebuild the trust? I

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Speaker 1: have to be honest with you. It is hard and

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Speaker 1: darn near impossible. In the beginning, trust is much easier

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Speaker 1: because no one has done anything to break that trust.

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Speaker 1: You haven't given your partner a reason to not trust you.

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Speaker 1: But all it all takes, all it takes is one time.

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Speaker 1: I'll just put it like that. All it takes is

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Speaker 1: one time. Then you're checking voicemails, you're checking social media posts,

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Speaker 1: you're pulling.

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Speaker 2: Up on them at lunch, showing up at.

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Speaker 1: Their job, all because they did something to make you

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Speaker 1: not trust them. This thing that you did that you

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Speaker 1: knew you shouldn't have done, like going to the strip club,

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Speaker 1: has turned into a big, huge mess now and you

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Speaker 1: see that, and yeah, it is true. It's the double standard.

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Speaker 1: And women aren't supposed to do what men do in

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Speaker 1: this society and still be a lady. But in case

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Speaker 1: you haven't noticed, times have changed. Some women these days

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Speaker 1: are really out for revenge when you do something to them.

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Speaker 1: They want you to feel that pain. They really really do.

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Speaker 1: They want to get back at you. So, so how

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Speaker 1: do you get the trust back? You ask? First, you

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Speaker 1: better find out if your wife wants to save this

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Speaker 1: marriage because she is doing her thing right now. You

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Speaker 1: got to stop going to strip clubs. You got to

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Speaker 1: get to work on your marriage, whether it's therapy, which

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Speaker 1: I do recommend for you guys, or whatever. But again,

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Speaker 1: regaining trust after it's broken, it's darn near.

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Speaker 2: Impossible, but it is possible, Steve.

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Speaker 4: Well, this letter right here, bruh. First of all, this

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Speaker 4: all on you all. It's on you.

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Speaker 1: You.

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Speaker 4: You did this one though, and as really, I don't

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Speaker 4: know if it's a lot I can help you with,

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Speaker 4: except that you come up with a compromised Now, you know,

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Speaker 4: y'all been married six years. Y'all got a daughter, You

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Speaker 4: thirty two, she thirty. Y'all was young when y'all started dating.

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Speaker 4: So y'all had a few three ways, and we went

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Speaker 4: to the strip club together all the time. We both

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Speaker 4: got saved right after we got married. I missed that part.

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Speaker 4: I ain't said that.

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Speaker 2: You didn't.

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Speaker 4: Oh, I didn't see that that that's a whole nother element.

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Speaker 3: Oh, thank you god.

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Speaker 4: We both got saved right after we got married.

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Speaker 3: That's key.

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Speaker 4: So, but I still got hills when I heard my

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Speaker 4: single friends talking about being with two girls at one time. Ohkay,

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Speaker 4: you got saved like I didn't. I said, that's what happened. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: he got saved like me. See, you know you got

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Speaker 4: people that get saved to get washed white as snow.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, me and here, we.

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Speaker 4: Just got wrist off. We didn't get the whole whitest

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Speaker 4: snow version. We just got wrisked off. So I am

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Speaker 4: about to be able to relate to this strawberry letter

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Speaker 4: except what you're doing.

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Speaker 3: But I do understand them.

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Speaker 4: I still got chills when I heard him talking about

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Speaker 4: being with two girls men now here he go.

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Speaker 3: Like a dummy.

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Speaker 4: I decided to check my wife to see if she

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Speaker 4: wanted to go to the strip club with me and

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Speaker 4: a group of our friends.

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Speaker 3: She said that she's not going, nor am I.

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Speaker 4: Now that seems reasonable, you know why, cause y'all saved. Now,

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Speaker 4: Oh dog, I'm so glad.

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Speaker 3: I saw that. That changes the parameters.

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Speaker 4: So you took Jose, You'll say yourself in there, tell

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Speaker 4: your wife you're going, and go back down to the

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Speaker 4: strip club with her and a group of friends.

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Speaker 3: She says she not going, nor am I.

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Speaker 4: I will tell you exactly why, other than being saved,

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Speaker 4: that they not going?

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Speaker 3: All right, all right.

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Speaker 1: All right, we'll have part two of your response coming

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Speaker 1: up Steve at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's

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Speaker 1: Strawberry letter, subject is the joke is on me this time.

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Speaker 2: We'll get back into it right after this.

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Speaker 1: You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show. Everyone at your girl,

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Speaker 1: Shirley Strawberry Here. April sixth is National ASA E Bowl

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Speaker 1: Day and Tropical Smoothie Cafe is offering tropic rewards members

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Speaker 1: five dollars off and ASA E Bowl or ASA E

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Speaker 1: Bowl with Nutella. It is a perfect way to treat

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Speaker 1: yourself to a refreshing tropical getaway. Not a member yet,

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Speaker 1: join the party by downloading the Tropical Smoothie Cafe app

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Speaker 1: and signing up to log into your account on April

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Speaker 1: sixth to redeem your offer of five dollars off and

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Speaker 1: I Side E Bowl or I sid E Bowl with Nutella.

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Speaker 1: All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's Strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: The subject is the joke is on me this time.

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Speaker 4: Thirty two ye old man, thirty year old woman. They've

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Speaker 4: been dating for a while, been married six years. They

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Speaker 4: got a three year old, okay, and before they got

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Speaker 4: married they was wild and they had a couple of

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Speaker 4: three ways they were and they had some couple of

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Speaker 4: three on threes and you know, swanging and went to

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Speaker 4: the strip club together all the time. Then after they

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Speaker 4: got married, they both got saved, Lord father, God, thanks saved.

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Speaker 3: But he got that version that I got a lot.

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Speaker 4: Of people get saved and get washed white as snow.

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Speaker 4: I just got ristof and that much look like happened

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Speaker 4: to him. But you didn't get rinsed off good at

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Speaker 4: all though.

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Speaker 3: Dog.

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Speaker 4: Of course, now you set up in here and let

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Speaker 4: your friends tell you that they was with a couple

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Speaker 4: of women at the strip club and you still got cheated. Then,

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Speaker 4: like a dummy this you need you need to go

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Speaker 4: back to getting you gotta go get saved again, dog,

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Speaker 4: because now you took your dumb you, you took your

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Speaker 4: dumb booty in down there to your wife to see

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Speaker 4: if she wanted to go to the strip club with

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Speaker 4: me and a group of our friends. She said she

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Speaker 4: ain't going, nor am I now here we go. You

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Speaker 4: know why she said that because y'all saved now. But

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Speaker 4: you know why she also said you ain't going and

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Speaker 4: I ain't going because she remembers what y'all used to

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Speaker 4: do when y'all got down there, And because y'all saved now,

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Speaker 4: she don't want to reintroduce that into the marriage. So

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Speaker 4: she said, I'm not going down there, and you ain't either,

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Speaker 4: So you ain't want an august.

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Speaker 3: You ain't pushing. But guess what you did?

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Speaker 4: You went anyway, and you're told her you was playing

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Speaker 4: cards with a group of friends. Well, one of your

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Speaker 4: friend's wives found out about it and told you that

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Speaker 4: she went to and and she went on to that

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Speaker 4: that that you went to the strip club, and you

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Speaker 4: lied to her. She told you if you want to

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Speaker 4: play in his own I told her women can't do

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Speaker 4: with me and doing. I put my foot down and said,

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Speaker 4: there's nothing wrong with going to the strip club.

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Speaker 3: Dog, I thought you got saved.

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Speaker 4: You can't brug Maybe you just got saved that day

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Speaker 4: for or you need to go get resaved dog, because

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Speaker 4: you just You're supposed to last longer than this. He's

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Speaker 4: supposed to give you a moral barometer, accomplases, supposed to

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Speaker 4: make you closer.

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Speaker 3: Walk with God.

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Speaker 4: Where you could get some strip to overcome your weaknesses.

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Speaker 3: That's what it does. Man.

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Speaker 4: You done told her it ain't nothing wrong with going

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Speaker 4: to the strip club. She say fine, cool. So I

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Speaker 4: went a few more times, and I told her before

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Speaker 4: I left after she told you, I'm not going and

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Speaker 4: you ain't going there, So you said. I went a

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Speaker 4: few more times, and I went, Now, what you're doing

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Speaker 4: down at the club though, because all these shields you

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Speaker 4: be getting from being with two women, did you stop

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Speaker 4: getting chilly?

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Speaker 3: All?

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Speaker 4: You went out there and something happened. So anyway, she

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Speaker 4: never said a word, so I thought it was cool.

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Speaker 4: That's when you real stupid. You think when a woman.

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Speaker 3: Get quiet that means everything cool. You're so stupid yourself stupid.

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Speaker 4: So then he told me she was going to Palm

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Speaker 4: Springs for her birthday with her sorority sisters.

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Speaker 3: It was a quick trip, so I was cool with it.

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Speaker 4: A week later I found out that they winted a

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Speaker 4: sprinter and hired two male strippers to entertain them on

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Speaker 4: the ride. She and four other married women win. So

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Speaker 4: it's four on two. But these boys is pros. They

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Speaker 4: know how to work four women. It's two of them.

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Speaker 4: They strong with it. Who I bet it was fine

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Speaker 4: too though. They was up in there and that sprinter

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Speaker 4: van I'm talking about sitting on their laps letting them

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Speaker 4: have it. She was so happy that to admit that

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Speaker 4: she lied to me. And she won't tell me where

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Speaker 4: she stayed or where the two strippers stayed. Okay, I'll

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Speaker 4: tell you what they wasn't in that sprinter and they

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Speaker 4: got hired for the whole weekend homie, and or they

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Speaker 4: picked them too, right boy, they've.

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Speaker 3: All four of them voted on them too.

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Speaker 4: She said, she don't question me, so she wants the

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Speaker 4: same grapes. Okay, so the joke's on me this time.

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Speaker 4: Now I want but this is not how I want

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Speaker 4: my marriage to go. Well, why did you do what

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Speaker 4: you did? Though she told you she wasn't going and

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Speaker 4: you wasn't going. This ain't how I want my marriage

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Speaker 4: should go. But then you thought it was cool and

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Speaker 4: you went down there a bunch of times. How do

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Speaker 4: we really rebuild the trust? Well, this ain't really trust.

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Speaker 4: You got to be bid you see. Let me tell

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Speaker 4: you what you did though. You open up a close

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Speaker 4: can of stinks. It's a big old can of stink

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Speaker 4: sitting in y'all's basement. You went down that got it,

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Speaker 4: got a screwdriver and opened up the whole can of

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Speaker 4: stink in the middle of the living room. Now to

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Speaker 4: open up the can. You said, let's go to the

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Speaker 4: strip club. She said, I'm not going, and you ain't going.

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Speaker 4: You put the lead back on the not a hogey,

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Speaker 4: but you took the can back in there and open

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Speaker 4: your back up, and you dip your.

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Speaker 2: Hands down in his candide.

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Speaker 4: Wow, put it in your wife's face and she can

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Speaker 4: smell the stink coming upstairs. All right?

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Speaker 1: Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter, It's Steve Harvey.

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Speaker 1: Fie facebooks, and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on

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Speaker 1: the free iHeartRadio app. Free Never Sounded So good. You

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Speaker 1: can download it Today you're listening to the Steve Harvey

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Speaker 1: Morning Show