WEBVTT - Make your own magic

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is to make your own magic. If there is

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<v Speaker 1>something special you would like to see happen in your life,

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<v Speaker 1>you don't have to wait around hoping it will happen.

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<v Speaker 1>You can make it happen yourself. Today's tip comes from

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<v Speaker 1>Kate Strickler, author of the book I Just Wish I

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<v Speaker 1>had a bigger kitchen and Other Lies I Think will

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<v Speaker 1>make Me Happy. Kate was a guest on my other podcast,

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<v Speaker 1>Best of Both Worlds, and she talked with my co

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<v Speaker 1>host Sarah Hart Hunger about how to avoid comparing yourself

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<v Speaker 1>to others in ways that are highly likely to make

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<v Speaker 1>you miserable. Sometimes people feel discouraged because they think that

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<v Speaker 1>others have more active social lives or more satisfying friendships

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<v Speaker 1>than they do, and you know what, they might. But

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<v Speaker 1>if you want to spend more time socializing and connecting,

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<v Speaker 1>you are best off not viewing these activities as magical

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<v Speaker 1>things that simply appear in people's lives. You don't have

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<v Speaker 1>to wait for others to invite you to do things. Instead,

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<v Speaker 1>Kate advises, make your own magic, as in, you can

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<v Speaker 1>invite people to do whatever you are hoping others will

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<v Speaker 1>invite you to do. If you want to go out

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<v Speaker 1>for brunch with friends, pick a date, pick a restaurant,

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<v Speaker 1>and text a handful of people you would enjoy spending

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<v Speaker 1>time with. Hopefully you will be able to rally a

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<v Speaker 1>few folks to join. Or maybe you've always thought it

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<v Speaker 1>would be fun to be in a book club. You

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<v Speaker 1>don't have to plan a year long curriculum and schedule

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<v Speaker 1>get botherings for every fourth Wednesday from now to the

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<v Speaker 1>end of time, though, If that is your style, feel

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<v Speaker 1>free to go for it. For a lot of us,

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<v Speaker 1>it would be easiest just to ask a few book

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<v Speaker 1>loving friends if they would like to come over in

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<v Speaker 1>a few weeks to discuss good people with you, then

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<v Speaker 1>see what unfolds from there. If you've got an old

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<v Speaker 1>friend that you don't see often, suggest meeting up for

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<v Speaker 1>a drink one night after work. Suggest three nights or

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<v Speaker 1>so in the next few weeks, and hopefully one will

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<v Speaker 1>work for your friend. If not, my guess is that

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<v Speaker 1>your invitation will spark something in your friend's brain. Chances

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<v Speaker 1>are he or she will suggest a different get together

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<v Speaker 1>in the next few weeks. It kind of is like

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<v Speaker 1>magic that way. You can make your own magic romantically too.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you wish your partner would send you flowers? If

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<v Speaker 1>it's flowers, you want, buy some for yourself. And if

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<v Speaker 1>it is, what's the act of your partner sending you flowers?

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<v Speaker 1>Then let your partner know that is your desire. If

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<v Speaker 1>you are dreaming of a fabulous anniversary dinner, make a reservation.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also make your own magic at work. Maybe

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<v Speaker 1>you wish your team socialized more. Guess what you have

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<v Speaker 1>the power to make this happen. Stick your head in

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<v Speaker 1>your colleague's offices when you're headed to the break room

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<v Speaker 1>to eat your lunch. Invite them to join you. After

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<v Speaker 1>a department meeting, you might ask if anyone would be

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<v Speaker 1>up for a happy hour that night. Invite new or

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<v Speaker 1>younger colleagues out to coffee to share tips on how

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<v Speaker 1>the office works. Many of these people will turn into friends.

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<v Speaker 1>If you want to travel but don't have a ready

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<v Speaker 1>travel companion, travel solo. You can also participate in a

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<v Speaker 1>group trip, like with your college alumni association or various

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<v Speaker 1>commercial companies. If you have got the time and the money,

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<v Speaker 1>don't let other people's willingness to go be the limiting factor.

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<v Speaker 1>You can make your own magic. With all sorts of

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<v Speaker 1>things in life, if you want something special, you can

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<v Speaker 1>plan it in yourself. I mean, you can hope that

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<v Speaker 1>someone else will plan it, but if so, you might

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<v Speaker 1>be waiting for a while. Whereas if you make your

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<v Speaker 1>own magic, the magic will happen, and I think that

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<v Speaker 1>is a better outcome. In the meantime, this is Laura.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of

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<v Speaker 1>our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've

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<v Speaker 1>got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at

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<v Speaker 1>Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a

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<v Speaker 1>production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit

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<v Speaker 1>the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

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<v Speaker 1>your favorite shows.