1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:09,360 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning, 2 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:16,920 Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's 3 00:00:16,920 --> 00:00:21,439 Speaker 1: tip is to make your own magic. If there is 4 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:24,080 Speaker 1: something special you would like to see happen in your life, 5 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:27,640 Speaker 1: you don't have to wait around hoping it will happen. 6 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:34,479 Speaker 1: You can make it happen yourself. Today's tip comes from 7 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:37,479 Speaker 1: Kate Strickler, author of the book I Just Wish I 8 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: had a bigger kitchen and Other Lies I Think will 9 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:44,480 Speaker 1: make Me Happy. Kate was a guest on my other podcast, 10 00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:47,599 Speaker 1: Best of Both Worlds, and she talked with my co 11 00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:51,400 Speaker 1: host Sarah Hart Hunger about how to avoid comparing yourself 12 00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:54,840 Speaker 1: to others in ways that are highly likely to make 13 00:00:54,880 --> 00:01:00,520 Speaker 1: you miserable. Sometimes people feel discouraged because they think that 14 00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:04,800 Speaker 1: others have more active social lives or more satisfying friendships 15 00:01:04,800 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 1: than they do, and you know what, they might. But 16 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:13,119 Speaker 1: if you want to spend more time socializing and connecting, 17 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:18,360 Speaker 1: you are best off not viewing these activities as magical 18 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:22,360 Speaker 1: things that simply appear in people's lives. You don't have 19 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:26,560 Speaker 1: to wait for others to invite you to do things. Instead, 20 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:32,759 Speaker 1: Kate advises, make your own magic, as in, you can 21 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:36,400 Speaker 1: invite people to do whatever you are hoping others will 22 00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:40,360 Speaker 1: invite you to do. If you want to go out 23 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:44,280 Speaker 1: for brunch with friends, pick a date, pick a restaurant, 24 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:47,360 Speaker 1: and text a handful of people you would enjoy spending 25 00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:50,320 Speaker 1: time with. Hopefully you will be able to rally a 26 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:54,120 Speaker 1: few folks to join. Or maybe you've always thought it 27 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:56,600 Speaker 1: would be fun to be in a book club. You 28 00:01:56,640 --> 00:01:59,800 Speaker 1: don't have to plan a year long curriculum and schedule 29 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:02,360 Speaker 1: get botherings for every fourth Wednesday from now to the 30 00:02:02,440 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: end of time, though, If that is your style, feel 31 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 1: free to go for it. For a lot of us, 32 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:11,040 Speaker 1: it would be easiest just to ask a few book 33 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,640 Speaker 1: loving friends if they would like to come over in 34 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:17,359 Speaker 1: a few weeks to discuss good people with you, then 35 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:21,000 Speaker 1: see what unfolds from there. If you've got an old 36 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:24,120 Speaker 1: friend that you don't see often, suggest meeting up for 37 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 1: a drink one night after work. Suggest three nights or 38 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 1: so in the next few weeks, and hopefully one will 39 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:34,120 Speaker 1: work for your friend. If not, my guess is that 40 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:38,400 Speaker 1: your invitation will spark something in your friend's brain. Chances 41 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:41,760 Speaker 1: are he or she will suggest a different get together 42 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:45,440 Speaker 1: in the next few weeks. It kind of is like 43 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:51,200 Speaker 1: magic that way. You can make your own magic romantically too. 44 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 1: Do you wish your partner would send you flowers? If 45 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:59,760 Speaker 1: it's flowers, you want, buy some for yourself. And if 46 00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 1: it is, what's the act of your partner sending you flowers? 47 00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:06,880 Speaker 1: Then let your partner know that is your desire. If 48 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:11,720 Speaker 1: you are dreaming of a fabulous anniversary dinner, make a reservation. 49 00:03:13,639 --> 00:03:17,120 Speaker 1: You can also make your own magic at work. Maybe 50 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:21,320 Speaker 1: you wish your team socialized more. Guess what you have 51 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,600 Speaker 1: the power to make this happen. Stick your head in 52 00:03:24,639 --> 00:03:26,959 Speaker 1: your colleague's offices when you're headed to the break room 53 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:31,120 Speaker 1: to eat your lunch. Invite them to join you. After 54 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:34,120 Speaker 1: a department meeting, you might ask if anyone would be 55 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 1: up for a happy hour that night. Invite new or 56 00:03:37,880 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 1: younger colleagues out to coffee to share tips on how 57 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:45,040 Speaker 1: the office works. Many of these people will turn into friends. 58 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 1: If you want to travel but don't have a ready 59 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:54,200 Speaker 1: travel companion, travel solo. You can also participate in a 60 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:57,880 Speaker 1: group trip, like with your college alumni association or various 61 00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: commercial companies. If you have got the time and the money, 62 00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 1: don't let other people's willingness to go be the limiting factor. 63 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:12,120 Speaker 1: You can make your own magic. With all sorts of 64 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: things in life, if you want something special, you can 65 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:18,560 Speaker 1: plan it in yourself. I mean, you can hope that 66 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:22,280 Speaker 1: someone else will plan it, but if so, you might 67 00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:25,560 Speaker 1: be waiting for a while. Whereas if you make your 68 00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: own magic, the magic will happen, and I think that 69 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: is a better outcome. In the meantime, this is Laura. 70 00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:42,080 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of 71 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:51,760 Speaker 1: our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've 72 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 1: got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at 73 00:04:56,040 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 1: Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a 74 00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:09,840 Speaker 1: production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit 75 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:13,719 Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to 76 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:14,599 Speaker 1: your favorite shows.