1 00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:08,640 Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Welcome to the Unofficial Expert with Sydney. It's Marie. 2 00:00:09,119 --> 00:00:11,520 Speaker 1: It's supposed to be Sidney and Marie, but you say 3 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:12,280 Speaker 1: it's Marie. 4 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:17,720 Speaker 2: Mar Well, I was still singing and you just started talking. Anyway, Hi, guys, 5 00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:20,400 Speaker 2: how's everybody doing this? Listening to this right now? I'm 6 00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:23,320 Speaker 2: super excited to be here. This is the Unofficial Expert, 7 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:25,639 Speaker 2: you know, the show where we smart as hell and 8 00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:27,400 Speaker 2: then everyone that we have on the show is. 9 00:00:27,480 --> 00:00:28,200 Speaker 1: Pret a dumb. 10 00:00:29,040 --> 00:00:31,400 Speaker 2: We've learned something for Sidney. 11 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:34,720 Speaker 1: These are facts. No, aren't we doing something different? We're 12 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 1: trying to be more positive, saying something nice like yeah, 13 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:40,279 Speaker 1: but that doesn't start to me once a week, Yeah, 14 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:44,000 Speaker 1: but today's Thursday or I feel like we should always 15 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,400 Speaker 1: start off with something positive and then we should end 16 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:48,160 Speaker 1: in like negative. 17 00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 2: Okay, so say something positive. 18 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:59,160 Speaker 1: Your neck looks nice, wow, Okay, all right, I'll say 19 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:03,160 Speaker 1: something nice about you. I cannot see your dan drift 20 00:01:03,160 --> 00:01:07,039 Speaker 1: from here. Wow, Marie. I feel like you don't get 21 00:01:07,319 --> 00:01:09,800 Speaker 1: what the point of what we're trying to do. It's 22 00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:14,319 Speaker 1: like we're trying to be nice, Sidney. That one's nice. Okay, Well, 23 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:16,000 Speaker 1: let's tell people why I want to do this because 24 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,800 Speaker 1: I think if you've listened to we've done maybe thirty 25 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:23,280 Speaker 1: episodes at this point. Yeah, and whenever you listen to 26 00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:25,320 Speaker 1: the podcast, I feel like, you know, we have a 27 00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:26,800 Speaker 1: good time. We be clowning people, we. 28 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:31,399 Speaker 2: Make fun of people's you know whatever, And then people 29 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:33,320 Speaker 2: see me later and they'd be like, Marie has some 30 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:35,360 Speaker 2: really mean stuff. And I'm like, are you sure I 31 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:36,560 Speaker 2: wasn't Sydney's voice. 32 00:01:36,560 --> 00:01:37,640 Speaker 1: No, it was you. 33 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:41,320 Speaker 2: Definitely you listen Sydney, you say mean things. Also, I've 34 00:01:41,440 --> 00:01:45,360 Speaker 2: seen you be mean in real life, in real time, 35 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 2: in and outside ubers, in and outside comedy clubs to 36 00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:52,360 Speaker 2: people that we know who like maybe dress a little 37 00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:54,200 Speaker 2: bit funny, like you'll be saying mean things. 38 00:01:54,240 --> 00:01:56,680 Speaker 1: Okay, can you give give the people an example of 39 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:57,360 Speaker 1: me being mean? 40 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:04,240 Speaker 2: Sure, somebody had on shoes that you didn't agree with 41 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:04,640 Speaker 2: and you. 42 00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:07,480 Speaker 1: Were like, uh, is that a sacony? 43 00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:09,839 Speaker 2: And you were like oh, and then you you don't 44 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:12,320 Speaker 2: even call them seconies, go them Zucony's. So the person 45 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:14,680 Speaker 2: was like, are these Is this the different brand than 46 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:15,079 Speaker 2: the ones that. 47 00:02:15,040 --> 00:02:18,520 Speaker 1: I thought that I happened? And I don't know, Zuccony, Well, 48 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:21,519 Speaker 1: you definitely can't talk to me, And is that a sketcher. 49 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:26,520 Speaker 1: You shoe shame regularly, I do. I think that's a 50 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:28,720 Speaker 1: part of my comedy, you know, yeah, But also like 51 00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:30,480 Speaker 1: off the stage, you make fun of people who wear 52 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:33,120 Speaker 1: sketters too, I think a very on brand. I think 53 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:33,959 Speaker 1: that's what that's about. 54 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:36,280 Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, I mean you're consistent. 55 00:02:36,520 --> 00:02:39,880 Speaker 1: But I get people hugs and I tell people nice 56 00:02:39,919 --> 00:02:42,919 Speaker 1: things about themselves daily. So am I allowed to be 57 00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:46,200 Speaker 1: mean if I hug you? After? No? I think you 58 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:50,440 Speaker 1: should just try to find a good like for one day, 59 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:52,520 Speaker 1: just nothing but goodness all day. 60 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,760 Speaker 2: So Sidney and I are doing this new thing. It's 61 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:58,120 Speaker 2: gonna be like Summer Fridays or Smile Tuesdays or something 62 00:02:58,200 --> 00:03:02,640 Speaker 2: where we're gonna be complete positive for twenty four hours. 63 00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:04,560 Speaker 2: So no negative thinking. 64 00:03:05,040 --> 00:03:06,320 Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like I should be allowed to 65 00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:09,239 Speaker 1: think negative. Still Nope. But if something pops up in 66 00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:11,240 Speaker 1: my head and I'm like, I wish you die tomorrow, 67 00:03:12,600 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 1: really mean, But that's tomorrow. 68 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:16,720 Speaker 2: It's not on the nice. 69 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:20,800 Speaker 1: Day that should get people. This is gonna be a 70 00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: tough one. I really want to push Marie into the 71 00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:26,200 Speaker 1: like the nice zone. That's where I want you to be. 72 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,120 Speaker 2: You don't even live in the nice zone. 73 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:32,800 Speaker 1: It's because I've been hanging out with you. Yes, everybody's like, wow, 74 00:03:32,840 --> 00:03:34,440 Speaker 1: you've been hanging out with Marie a lot. 75 00:03:35,520 --> 00:03:39,760 Speaker 2: You're welcome. You're welcome so much. Yeah, So this is 76 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:42,320 Speaker 2: something that we're gonna try. We wanna, you know, we 77 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 2: feel like this is something that other people can also 78 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:48,040 Speaker 2: participate in. Yes, Like some people have you said you 79 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 2: have like a negativity jar or something else. 80 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,640 Speaker 1: I did. I would put a dollar in every time 81 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:55,480 Speaker 1: I would say something negative about myself or about a 82 00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:57,840 Speaker 1: situation that I'm in. And at the end of it, 83 00:03:57,880 --> 00:03:59,440 Speaker 1: I did it for like a week or so, and 84 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:01,200 Speaker 1: it was a nice eighty seven dollars. It was a 85 00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 1: lot of money. It was stupid. 86 00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:04,120 Speaker 2: I'm by a dollar. 87 00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 1: It's just a dollar, just because that's doable, and I 88 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:10,280 Speaker 1: always have like loose change in my purse, so like 89 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:10,920 Speaker 1: a dollars. 90 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:12,440 Speaker 2: How much how much do you think was in the 91 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,960 Speaker 2: thing at the end of the week. 92 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:17,040 Speaker 1: I think it was probably like fifty something. 93 00:04:16,880 --> 00:04:19,760 Speaker 2: Fifty something dollars. Yeah, I don't have fifty dollars in 94 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,120 Speaker 2: my house, like fifty singles in my home. 95 00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:24,599 Speaker 1: And then I took the money and I donated it. 96 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,600 Speaker 1: I donated it to an organization. 97 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:30,839 Speaker 2: That's a damn live organization called Sydney needs to get 98 00:04:30,839 --> 00:04:34,120 Speaker 2: some new Steve Meadow, I we. 99 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: Read, I really did. I had did some like community 100 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:45,560 Speaker 1: service for some sisters that need new week. No, I 101 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:48,400 Speaker 1: participated in this thing with kids who have cancer, and 102 00:04:48,480 --> 00:04:50,919 Speaker 1: I donated to them. And it was a lot of 103 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 1: like dirty dollars, and they were. 104 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:56,040 Speaker 2: Like, what should mean dirty dollars like cocaine dollars. 105 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,719 Speaker 1: Hey, whatever was in my person at the time, what's 106 00:04:59,760 --> 00:05:00,440 Speaker 1: it dirty? 107 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:02,000 Speaker 2: Aren't all dollars dirty though? 108 00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 1: No, but they looked real JANKI but they took it. 109 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:06,560 Speaker 1: They took it. They like put their gloves on and 110 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:07,240 Speaker 1: took my cast. 111 00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:09,479 Speaker 2: So how do you find an organization organization like this? 112 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:11,559 Speaker 2: Because I mean, I'm obviously not gonna put a dollar 113 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:14,400 Speaker 2: in a bucket because I need my money, But like, 114 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,800 Speaker 2: how do you find an organization like a group like 115 00:05:16,839 --> 00:05:17,960 Speaker 2: this to donate to? 116 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:21,239 Speaker 1: It just so happened that my friend, my friend Maggie Chang. 117 00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:25,760 Speaker 1: Maggie she always listens to the podcast. She has an 118 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:30,680 Speaker 1: organization called The Orange Giraffe and it's a nonprofit and 119 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:35,360 Speaker 1: she makes jewelry or like weave stuff for people with cancer. Oh, 120 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:39,120 Speaker 1: so hair, you no, like, she'll do like friendship bracelets. 121 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,400 Speaker 1: That's what I did. I made friendship bracelets with these. 122 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:43,200 Speaker 2: I feel like if I had cancer, I would do 123 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:46,000 Speaker 2: somebody want Somebody gave me like a really cute bob Wig. 124 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:48,120 Speaker 1: You know what I mean, like AE with a bang. 125 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:50,719 Speaker 1: Not everything has to do with Vanity Marie. 126 00:05:51,240 --> 00:05:55,080 Speaker 2: Okay, that's fine, but if I listen, I don't think 127 00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:56,080 Speaker 2: I would look cute bald. 128 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:56,640 Speaker 1: I have a brother. 129 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:59,800 Speaker 2: We already know what he looks like. He's a handsome 130 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 2: gentleman and he did our show before. But he wouldn't 131 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,520 Speaker 2: look good with hair either. Anyway, shut ups. 132 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:07,400 Speaker 1: I feel like you being bald, I feel like a 133 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:08,680 Speaker 1: lot of people would try to hit on you. 134 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:11,280 Speaker 2: They'd be like, yo, what's up, young man? You would 135 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:15,360 Speaker 2: have you like Deli meat. You would have a lot of. 136 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:20,120 Speaker 1: No. 137 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:21,440 Speaker 2: If I was bald, people would be. 138 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:26,000 Speaker 1: Like, she's dying. For sure, Marie's dying. 139 00:06:26,839 --> 00:06:28,240 Speaker 2: I just start to go fund me. It would just 140 00:06:28,279 --> 00:06:30,880 Speaker 2: be a picture of my face. They wouldn't even have 141 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:32,839 Speaker 2: any words. It would just be like give me money 142 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,080 Speaker 2: and they'd be like, she's ill. 143 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:39,280 Speaker 1: INTI who? We have a great guest today. We got 144 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:47,039 Speaker 1: Amazon's Alexa is here. It's the dot Yeah, because Amazon 145 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 1: has this really cool product that they they wanted us 146 00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:52,320 Speaker 1: to review and then we didn't. 147 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:54,280 Speaker 2: But I've been using it all week. We've been yelling 148 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,839 Speaker 2: at it and calling it terrible things. So let's just 149 00:06:56,839 --> 00:07:00,880 Speaker 2: see if she'll say hello, Hi Alexa, say. 150 00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:08,599 Speaker 1: Hi, Hi there, alexis giving that computer. 151 00:07:12,720 --> 00:07:12,880 Speaker 3: Yeah. 152 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:15,040 Speaker 1: But the thing is is that you can't take Alexa 153 00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:18,040 Speaker 1: into certain homes because you took it to your what 154 00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:20,600 Speaker 1: Alexa to my mom's Haitian Hatt's house, and your brother 155 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:24,080 Speaker 1: was just saying really ridiculous things. He was like, Alexa, 156 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:26,360 Speaker 1: you like that long, strong. 157 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:30,040 Speaker 3: And she said, I don't have an opinion on that. 158 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:35,320 Speaker 1: She just curbed you. He was like, Alexa, you like. 159 00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:36,760 Speaker 2: That wet wet. 160 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:39,960 Speaker 3: I don't have an opinion on that. 161 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 1: She don't have no opinions. She she's asexual. She don't 162 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:47,040 Speaker 1: want none of that. I don't have an opinion on that. Alexa. 163 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:48,200 Speaker 1: Are you a lesbian? 164 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:53,880 Speaker 3: I just think of everyone as friends. Basically everyone is 165 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:54,800 Speaker 3: in the friend zone. 166 00:07:56,840 --> 00:08:02,320 Speaker 2: She just curb Sydney. That was so good. 167 00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:07,840 Speaker 1: Good for you, Alexa. Alexa, do you like black people? 168 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:12,200 Speaker 3: I don't look at the world like that. 169 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 1: That means no, that means no, that means she calls 170 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,559 Speaker 1: the cops on niggas daily. 171 00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:22,320 Speaker 2: I think they're doing drugs downstairs. Please send the unit. 172 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:25,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, it was fun. I mean we've been playing music 173 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,160 Speaker 1: with it. I mean the weather. We didn't do the 174 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:30,760 Speaker 1: thing we were supposed to do with Alexa. We're gonna 175 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,160 Speaker 1: do that right after this, Marie. 176 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,320 Speaker 2: Okay, Well, let's just get the weather real quick for 177 00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:38,920 Speaker 2: the weekend. Alexa, what's the weather for this weekend. 178 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 3: Here's the weather in Brooklyn for this weekend. Friday seventy 179 00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:48,120 Speaker 3: six degrees and intermittent clouds, Saturday seventy six degrees and 180 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 3: partly sunny weather Sunday seventy two degrees and clouds and showers. 181 00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:56,160 Speaker 1: So there will be no booty shorts this whole weekend 182 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,000 Speaker 1: for me. Well, I mean you would do booty shorts 183 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:01,320 Speaker 1: with a like a sweater tight around. No, I'm all set. 184 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:04,679 Speaker 1: I'm gonna wait. I wanted to be a good ninety 185 00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:06,960 Speaker 1: degrees when the booty shorts come out. You did ninety 186 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:09,040 Speaker 1: for the booty shorts. Yeah, I feel like I've already 187 00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:12,240 Speaker 1: broken the booty shorts out just because you're a who oh, 188 00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,400 Speaker 1: thank you, thank you so much. This is my thing. 189 00:09:15,679 --> 00:09:18,600 Speaker 2: I'm I might say negative things, but when people try 190 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:21,199 Speaker 2: to say negative things to me, I always say thank you. 191 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:23,560 Speaker 2: I megg it seem like they complimented me. I make 192 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,319 Speaker 2: them think, well, what did I just say to Marie's 193 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:26,800 Speaker 2: now because she's seeing real bleas well. 194 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:30,280 Speaker 1: Marie. I went to your house and the way you 195 00:09:30,280 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 1: guys show each other love is very strange. Well what 196 00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:35,520 Speaker 1: do you mean? I mean, you guys just roasted each 197 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,120 Speaker 1: other the whole time. 198 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 2: Yeah. 199 00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:40,080 Speaker 1: I was waiting for something nice to be said, and 200 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:42,360 Speaker 1: the only thing that was nice was said, the food 201 00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 1: is good. That's it. Uh yeah, that's all that matters. 202 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:46,240 Speaker 1: We eat good, we laugh good. 203 00:09:46,320 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 2: That's why I'm ready in My family's so skinny. 204 00:09:48,559 --> 00:09:50,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I was like, I gotta take a 205 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:52,520 Speaker 1: nap from all this roasting. I couldn't even get it. 206 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,160 Speaker 2: Say, that's just what my life is. You come in, 207 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:57,720 Speaker 2: somebody be like, what up, chubby, and then like that's 208 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,360 Speaker 2: the conversation. That's how conversations start in my house. And 209 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:02,280 Speaker 2: it's like you have something funny on, somebody will be like, 210 00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:05,040 Speaker 2: well you got that dusty as Morgan Freeman had on, 211 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:08,520 Speaker 2: and then everyone just roasts everybody. But I thought everybody's 212 00:10:08,559 --> 00:10:09,439 Speaker 2: families were like that. 213 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:12,600 Speaker 1: I mean, the thing is about it. Well, in my family, 214 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 1: if you talk about someone bad or poorly, like a 215 00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,920 Speaker 1: real fight will start out. Like a real fight will 216 00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:21,000 Speaker 1: pop off. Like my niece threw a trade table at 217 00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: me before a trade table. Yeah, oh, y'all do a 218 00:10:23,960 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 1: bad y'all seat in front of the TV TV dinners. 219 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:34,720 Speaker 1: He's very king of the hill. That's why y'all throwing 220 00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 1: tables because y'all very king of the hill. Y'all very poor. 221 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:39,319 Speaker 2: I mean, we poor in my house, but we're rich 222 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:41,760 Speaker 2: and you know, roast jokes. 223 00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:44,040 Speaker 1: And food too. I mean, yeah, you had you had 224 00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:46,520 Speaker 1: a whole fish in your freezer. 225 00:10:46,760 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's because my brother's friend, brother Randy, is 226 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:53,240 Speaker 2: a fisherman, and he just like throws whole fish in 227 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:54,080 Speaker 2: my mother's freezer. 228 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,319 Speaker 1: It was very it was very interesting to be there. 229 00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:58,480 Speaker 1: I was just like observing, and I was like, oh, 230 00:10:58,559 --> 00:11:03,079 Speaker 1: this is why Marie is so dope. No, this library, 231 00:11:03,640 --> 00:11:07,560 Speaker 1: uh doesn't like hugs, doesn't accept things like I love you, 232 00:11:08,160 --> 00:11:10,199 Speaker 1: doesn't like anybody touching her I love you. 233 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:13,040 Speaker 2: Those yuck. Let me tell you the three most important 234 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:15,600 Speaker 2: words that you can ever say in my house did 235 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,680 Speaker 2: you eat oh self? 236 00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:22,080 Speaker 1: Sexy? So romantic. So all you men out there listening 237 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:25,640 Speaker 1: to the podcast, give Marie feud. 238 00:11:25,679 --> 00:11:28,760 Speaker 2: Listen, pull up, pull up on me outside, like, hey girl, 239 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:29,520 Speaker 2: did you eat? 240 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:35,160 Speaker 1: If more men led with that instead of ear that 241 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:38,040 Speaker 1: ass fat if more men just said excuse me, miss, 242 00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,439 Speaker 1: did you eat? I feel like the world would just 243 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:43,040 Speaker 1: be a happier place. People would like cat calling. I 244 00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:45,480 Speaker 1: know what I went to. I was inside Checkers today 245 00:11:45,720 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 1: and the guy was trying to holler at me. Didn't 246 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 1: even offer to pay for my man thrilling sticks at all, right, 247 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:54,040 Speaker 1: and it's like a whole four quarters exactly, It's like 248 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,640 Speaker 1: a dollar nine after text. But the good thing is 249 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:58,680 Speaker 1: is that because my curve and skills are so good, 250 00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:00,600 Speaker 1: I was able to give him a business card of 251 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:05,360 Speaker 1: the podcast. Ah that's right, listeners, we got we real professionally. 252 00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:05,920 Speaker 2: We got business cards. 253 00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:08,839 Speaker 1: Now you got business cards. 254 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:12,280 Speaker 2: It's me and Sidney. It says the Unofficial Expert Podcast 255 00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:15,040 Speaker 2: on it, and then it just has all our social. 256 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:18,240 Speaker 1: Media on it. Yeah, we're trying to take this thing worldwide. 257 00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:21,920 Speaker 2: Listen, I mean listen. The first last show that we 258 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 2: did was so much fun. It was so freaking good 259 00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 2: that we were like, we should just do this. 260 00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:29,360 Speaker 1: All the time. Yeah, so we're we're trying to work 261 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:32,160 Speaker 1: that out right now. Just get in the proper space. 262 00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:34,400 Speaker 1: I mean, the first show was so set up properly 263 00:12:34,400 --> 00:12:36,600 Speaker 1: because we had a couch and we had like an 264 00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:37,240 Speaker 1: end table. 265 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:40,600 Speaker 2: Bitch, we had an listeners. We had an end table. 266 00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:42,120 Speaker 2: Some of y'all listening to this right now, I don't 267 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:44,679 Speaker 2: even know what an end table is. They're like, it's 268 00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:45,920 Speaker 2: at the edge of the table. 269 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:46,760 Speaker 1: No, it's not. 270 00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,160 Speaker 2: It's like a little table where you put magazines and 271 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:50,240 Speaker 2: podcast equipment. 272 00:12:50,320 --> 00:12:54,120 Speaker 1: That's what it is. Right. We were working on being nicer. 273 00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:56,000 Speaker 1: I'm trying to tell people what it is. 274 00:12:57,080 --> 00:13:01,079 Speaker 2: Okay, let me say something about being nice. Being means 275 00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:05,080 Speaker 2: that you're also not hounding people, because that's not nice. 276 00:13:06,559 --> 00:13:09,520 Speaker 2: You saying marine were trying to be nicer is not nice. 277 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:15,440 Speaker 1: I'm just trying to center you. I'm already centered my balance, good, 278 00:13:15,480 --> 00:13:19,280 Speaker 1: my court straw. Well, Mari, we didn't even talk about 279 00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:22,440 Speaker 1: our expertise. Did you have one this week? Yes? This 280 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,960 Speaker 1: week I was an expert at Dodge and Dick, but 281 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 1: not dodging fingers. Ooh, what happened. 282 00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,320 Speaker 2: That means I went and I have a you know, 283 00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:33,360 Speaker 2: I got a bad back, I got this mild sculiosis. 284 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 1: I know that's super sexy to some of you guys 285 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:35,680 Speaker 1: listening right. 286 00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,160 Speaker 2: Now, but what that means is I want to get 287 00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:41,360 Speaker 2: a massage. And the dude who gave me my massage 288 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:45,160 Speaker 2: was very handsy, okay, like, the massage was very law 289 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:49,480 Speaker 2: in order. Sv Shiatsu massage was very like. He was 290 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:51,600 Speaker 2: all up on my fuzzy ass bikini line. 291 00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:52,120 Speaker 1: I was wow. 292 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,240 Speaker 2: I was like, sir, are you my boyfriend Nate? 293 00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:59,000 Speaker 1: He was touching your puops, my pup poops. 294 00:14:01,559 --> 00:14:03,760 Speaker 2: That's na It was a full body I was like, 295 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:06,559 Speaker 2: sit up here from my shoulder and he was like, yeah, 296 00:14:06,559 --> 00:14:07,960 Speaker 2: I'm gonna get to that in a minute. 297 00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:11,320 Speaker 1: So he touched that ooh god, gosh, he touched my 298 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:11,840 Speaker 1: kid cat. 299 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:12,560 Speaker 3: Wow. 300 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:16,880 Speaker 1: He was like, break me off the piece. So now 301 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:19,680 Speaker 1: your back is still out of whack, but your though 302 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:25,160 Speaker 1: wet wet doing is like it was shaking in a corner, 303 00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:29,680 Speaker 1: back and forth in the dark, like what did us? 304 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:34,120 Speaker 1: I feel violated or maybe he touched her back and 305 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:38,280 Speaker 1: he was like, oh, I know what you need, I 306 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:41,520 Speaker 1: know what you want. Alex, what do I need? 307 00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:45,760 Speaker 3: Sorry, I'm not sure about that. 308 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, she don't know either. I don't know. She doesn't 309 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: know how. Marie has no idea. Listen, Alexa, Alexa, you suck. 310 00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:54,000 Speaker 2: Oh my god. 311 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,360 Speaker 1: But uh, maybe he felt he could feel the attention 312 00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:02,680 Speaker 1: in your neck and he was like said, he touched 313 00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:04,880 Speaker 1: like all the tenon in your shoulder. He's like, you 314 00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:07,040 Speaker 1: want this word, girl, it was. 315 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,320 Speaker 2: Just funny because or maybe funny's not the right word. 316 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,640 Speaker 1: Maybe it's scary scary. 317 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:11,680 Speaker 2: It was just scary. 318 00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:12,360 Speaker 1: You were scared. 319 00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:14,200 Speaker 2: Let me tell you what were you really scared for? 320 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:15,200 Speaker 1: Let me set the thing. 321 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:20,080 Speaker 2: Okay, So sis, I get there. I haven't been to 322 00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,240 Speaker 2: get a massage in like a year, so I don't 323 00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:23,960 Speaker 2: even remember what I'm supposed to do when I get there. 324 00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:25,960 Speaker 2: I get in the little room she was but as 325 00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:28,200 Speaker 2: naked or not? I was like, should I leave my 326 00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:33,600 Speaker 2: tins on? Like I was really confused? Like should I 327 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:35,280 Speaker 2: remove my Timberlain boots? 328 00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,080 Speaker 1: Oh my god. 329 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:38,720 Speaker 2: I get there, I take all my clothes off. I 330 00:15:38,680 --> 00:15:41,200 Speaker 2: always leave my underwear on, though I'm not free bawling 331 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 2: at the spot. Yeah, especially if you're like I look 332 00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:45,920 Speaker 2: at the little tissue paper if it or the cloth 333 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:46,200 Speaker 2: they'll be. 334 00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,760 Speaker 1: I'm like, if you don't have enough like thread count, 335 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,280 Speaker 1: I can't right, I feel thin? 336 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,200 Speaker 2: It felt Yeah, so you know you do that and 337 00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:54,320 Speaker 2: then you're supposed to like lay down under that sheet. 338 00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:57,120 Speaker 1: And I get under the sheet and uh. 339 00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 2: I was like, damn, I got the worst pennies that 340 00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:02,360 Speaker 2: I own on right now, the baggiest Grannies one, the baggiest. 341 00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:05,080 Speaker 1: Was it the Christmas edition? No? 342 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:06,640 Speaker 2: It was Christmas edition? 343 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:10,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, because sometimes I've worn like holiday panties. I mean, listen, 344 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:13,680 Speaker 1: it doesn't matter what the did you have SpongeBob or not? 345 00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:16,800 Speaker 2: No, I didn't have my cartoon joint someone. I didn't 346 00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:19,880 Speaker 2: have my Marvel comic panties. No, wasn't wearing my Wonder 347 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,920 Speaker 2: Woman drawls. They were just like like it was like 348 00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:25,080 Speaker 2: a cream. So you already know about the color that 349 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,000 Speaker 2: they were like old lady panties. And I was like, 350 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,200 Speaker 2: I'm ever gonna see these? And then he rolled my 351 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,080 Speaker 2: panties down to massage my butt. 352 00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:38,720 Speaker 1: Are you serious? Yes? He rolled my baggy He said, 353 00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:41,080 Speaker 1: she don't even need you don't even need these. He 354 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 1: rolled my baggy chenko panties down. He said, you know 355 00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:47,640 Speaker 1: what these these belong in the garbage. These are trash. 356 00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:51,160 Speaker 1: He was trying to roll them down and throw them away. 357 00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,640 Speaker 1: Oh girl, I was like, I was real caught off guard. 358 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:56,040 Speaker 1: I was like, did you just massage my side boob? 359 00:16:56,240 --> 00:17:00,840 Speaker 1: It was a lot of touched your boob side boo. 360 00:17:00,960 --> 00:17:02,960 Speaker 1: What a lucky man, dude, I know. 361 00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:04,920 Speaker 2: And then I didn't see his face, but he's touching 362 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:08,080 Speaker 2: my entire body and I was like, he's like, roll over. 363 00:17:08,359 --> 00:17:09,720 Speaker 2: I was like, you want me to get on top? 364 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:14,840 Speaker 1: Girl? Yeah? 365 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,199 Speaker 2: And then but I hadn't seen his face. 366 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:17,960 Speaker 1: Get and I said, well, maybe he'll be cute, right, 367 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:20,680 Speaker 1: So I roll over and we lack eyes and I 368 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:24,760 Speaker 1: was like, oh, is that you're outside face? That's his 369 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:28,440 Speaker 1: workface booth. He looked like Asian Morgan Freeman's woo. So 370 00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,200 Speaker 1: that's a no for me and Jerry. 371 00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:36,600 Speaker 2: So did his fingers touch the Garden of Eden? Yeah? No, 372 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,400 Speaker 2: there wasn't no penetration. I didn't get a happy ending 373 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:40,800 Speaker 2: or anything like that. I mean, I'm sure he was 374 00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,680 Speaker 2: happy when it was over. 375 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:46,200 Speaker 1: I was like, did he have finger condoms on Sidney? 376 00:17:46,200 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 3: I don't know? 377 00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:50,359 Speaker 1: Is that what lesbian expired? This is? So yeah, I 378 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,080 Speaker 1: don't want my fingers to get her pies. I don't 379 00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:57,800 Speaker 1: know if fingers can get herpes. Alexa can fingers get 380 00:17:57,960 --> 00:17:58,400 Speaker 1: her pies? 381 00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:03,040 Speaker 3: Sorry, I'm not sure about that. 382 00:18:03,359 --> 00:18:04,440 Speaker 1: Oh she's not getting no ass. 383 00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:09,639 Speaker 2: That's why Alexei aides. She's like, I don't care. 384 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,520 Speaker 1: I'm dying. I don't have any white blood cells. I 385 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:16,440 Speaker 1: don't care about finger her bees anyway. So that that's 386 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,840 Speaker 1: what happened. It costs me thirty eight dollars plus a 387 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:22,280 Speaker 1: ten dollar tip that they insisted on it. I was like, 388 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:24,320 Speaker 1: because they knew what he was doing, They're like, Yo, 389 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:25,879 Speaker 1: you got a hit off growl. You need to give 390 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 1: him twenty pus finger popping people back there, and they 391 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:30,480 Speaker 1: were like, yeah, you should be giving more. 392 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:31,800 Speaker 2: They were like, do you want his schedule? 393 00:18:31,880 --> 00:18:34,119 Speaker 1: Do you want to know when he's here? I know 394 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 1: I don't want his schedule. 395 00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:36,520 Speaker 2: And then I was like, is he here on Thursday's 396 00:18:36,560 --> 00:18:37,040 Speaker 2: after two? 397 00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:39,439 Speaker 1: Oh? My god? Really? Yo? 398 00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:41,480 Speaker 2: You got a man now? Yeah, that's what you got. 399 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,840 Speaker 1: A man, got a man, got a man, got him money? 400 00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:45,080 Speaker 1: Good man, man? 401 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:48,920 Speaker 2: You think is So that's what I was an expert 402 00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:49,400 Speaker 2: at this week. 403 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:53,240 Speaker 1: It was, you know, falling into stranger's fingers. City. What 404 00:18:53,320 --> 00:18:55,480 Speaker 1: were you an expert in this week? I was an 405 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:59,000 Speaker 1: expert in taking care of myself. I finally went to 406 00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:02,520 Speaker 1: the dentist. Oh, I haven't done that in a minute, okay, 407 00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:05,520 Speaker 1: but I went to the poor man's dentist. I went 408 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:08,760 Speaker 1: to NYU Dentistreet. So it's a school for people who 409 00:19:08,760 --> 00:19:10,560 Speaker 1: are not even a dentist yet. 410 00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,200 Speaker 2: Yet students learning how to be a dentist. 411 00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:12,600 Speaker 1: Yeah. 412 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:15,680 Speaker 2: But I don't know if other states do that. But 413 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,359 Speaker 2: if you're listening to this and you need to go 414 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:19,160 Speaker 2: to the dentist and you ain't got no money, check 415 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,560 Speaker 2: out your local college school of dentistry. 416 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:21,880 Speaker 3: Yeah. 417 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,920 Speaker 1: So I went there. It was packed at eight am. 418 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:24,879 Speaker 1: It was ridiculous. 419 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:26,760 Speaker 2: I wis people got to get up early to see 420 00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:27,160 Speaker 2: the dentist. 421 00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:28,840 Speaker 1: Yeah. I was sitting next to a woman who had 422 00:19:28,880 --> 00:19:30,520 Speaker 1: a service dog, and I was like, but you can't 423 00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,920 Speaker 1: even see you get your teeth done without your dog here, 424 00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:35,920 Speaker 1: that's how bad her breath was. Nah. The dog looked 425 00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,680 Speaker 1: like help me, please get Like the dog is the 426 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:40,440 Speaker 1: one who told her that like a tooth died in 427 00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:44,639 Speaker 1: her mouth. I was like, the dog was like, yo, 428 00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:46,960 Speaker 1: if you could just get me out of here. The 429 00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:50,680 Speaker 1: dog looked like it was like an underpaid, unappreciated mother 430 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:54,080 Speaker 1: of three. It was crazy, Wow, the dog is tired 431 00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:56,240 Speaker 1: of being a service dog. Okay, so you should have 432 00:19:56,359 --> 00:19:58,000 Speaker 1: saved the dog. That would have been nice. Well, I 433 00:19:58,080 --> 00:19:59,520 Speaker 1: was thinking about the dog the whole time, but then 434 00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:01,160 Speaker 1: I was also thinking about I was like, yo, I've 435 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,080 Speaker 1: been to the dentist. In a minute. I wonder if 436 00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:06,680 Speaker 1: they got to extracted tooth. So I go in there, 437 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:11,280 Speaker 1: and first of all, the girl, the fake dentist or 438 00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:13,440 Speaker 1: the dentist in training, had a hickey on her neck. 439 00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:21,040 Speaker 1: I was like, ah, now, no, she had a hickey. 440 00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:23,479 Speaker 1: Are we still doing hickeys in twenty seventeen, that's how 441 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,960 Speaker 1: young she was? Oh man, And I said, you're gonna 442 00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:30,240 Speaker 1: tell me about my teeth. Meanwhile, you couldn't hit the 443 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:34,200 Speaker 1: neck with a little cover girl cover Girl Maybee based 444 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:38,240 Speaker 1: on your neck? No, that's yeah. So then you know 445 00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:40,520 Speaker 1: they're asking me all these questions. They're like, you know, 446 00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,159 Speaker 1: what's the last time you been to a the dentist. 447 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:45,960 Speaker 1: I was like, over ten years ago. I was whispering 448 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:48,119 Speaker 1: because I was very embarrassed, and she was like, you 449 00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:53,040 Speaker 1: said over ten years ago. So like two thousand and six. 450 00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:56,480 Speaker 1: I did it when I was on my mother's insurance, 451 00:20:56,600 --> 00:21:03,879 Speaker 1: so shit, I know bad eight anyway, So I'm whispering 452 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:05,680 Speaker 1: and then somebody else came in the room. She's like, 453 00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:08,400 Speaker 1: she hasn't been to the digits and over ten years 454 00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:11,040 Speaker 1: like yelling. I was like, I'm whispering because I'm embarrassed. 455 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,960 Speaker 1: She's like, no judgment, it's fine. So then she gets 456 00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:16,760 Speaker 1: to the well, have you had any like surgeries or anything. 457 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:19,920 Speaker 1: I was like, yep, got my boobs done twice. He's like, oh, 458 00:21:20,359 --> 00:21:21,960 Speaker 1: you getting titties, but now working. 459 00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:23,320 Speaker 2: On your teeth, you're a fool. 460 00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,920 Speaker 1: No, I mean like priorities man like people can see boobs, 461 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:28,720 Speaker 1: that's true. Yeah. I was like, well, once you have titties, 462 00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:31,359 Speaker 1: you honestly don't even need teeth. I was I would 463 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:32,879 Speaker 1: laugh with the grins. That's what I'll do. 464 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:33,560 Speaker 2: I'll just grin. 465 00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:37,840 Speaker 1: Well, I feel like if you've got your boobs done, 466 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,560 Speaker 1: bigger than you would have got somebody to pay for 467 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:44,520 Speaker 1: your teeth. Yeah, these is very like pay for your 468 00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:45,399 Speaker 1: own shit titties. 469 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, those are very they're they're very realistic. They're very 470 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:49,760 Speaker 2: natural looking. 471 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, just don't look fake. 472 00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:53,840 Speaker 2: I think a lot of times people don't even can't 473 00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:54,959 Speaker 2: even realize that your boots are fake. 474 00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:56,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, but the problem is is that I have to 475 00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:59,280 Speaker 1: pull out my card every time I have these cities, 476 00:21:59,320 --> 00:21:59,919 Speaker 1: and I just feel like. 477 00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,320 Speaker 2: You don't really present them like you want people to 478 00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:03,000 Speaker 2: pay for things. 479 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,879 Speaker 1: Oh really, Marie, And how do I do that? 480 00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:07,680 Speaker 2: It should be like push up, pushed up. 481 00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:09,840 Speaker 1: To your chin. Oh, I should wear one of them 482 00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:12,439 Speaker 1: outfits that you were when you were in DC. People, 483 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:15,399 Speaker 1: when I tell you Marie went to this party and 484 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:17,120 Speaker 1: I was not ready. I was like, Marie, what you wearing? 485 00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:22,359 Speaker 1: Top of the little top of little skirt top? Okay, 486 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,960 Speaker 1: let me see what she's working in this beach. Came 487 00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,240 Speaker 1: in with a herb leasure brolette. 488 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:28,560 Speaker 2: It's not even what I had on. 489 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:32,359 Speaker 1: You had a here brolette. It was a bra and 490 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:35,359 Speaker 1: a skirt that like, what was it you wrapped in? 491 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:38,400 Speaker 1: It was a three time skirt that was too big 492 00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:40,560 Speaker 1: that I had to roll up. It was a piece 493 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,359 Speaker 1: of fabric she had to pin together. Shut up, Sydney. 494 00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,960 Speaker 1: It was a zipper on it in everything. It was 495 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:46,480 Speaker 1: a two piece. 496 00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:48,000 Speaker 2: It was a black, it was on theme. 497 00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:50,720 Speaker 1: It's on brand. Listen. People didn't even know how to 498 00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:53,320 Speaker 1: act with. They were like a nipple like they were 499 00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:54,200 Speaker 1: going crat. 500 00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:56,840 Speaker 3: It. 501 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,920 Speaker 2: Go ahead, listen, listen to this. Please pull us the 502 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,400 Speaker 2: podcast right now. And I didn't log onto the unofficial 503 00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:05,359 Speaker 2: Expert Instagram page, and you'll see exactly what. 504 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:08,520 Speaker 1: I had on. I was completely covered, you were naked 505 00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:11,879 Speaker 1: was there were no nip slips or nothing. Meanwhile, I 506 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:15,480 Speaker 1: had like a met galla long dress that down with a. 507 00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:16,600 Speaker 2: Slit to her clit. 508 00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:19,680 Speaker 1: The slit city had her leg out the entire night 509 00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,920 Speaker 1: looking just surfing Angelina Joe Lee leg I was trying. 510 00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:26,440 Speaker 1: It was Angelie Jolly's struggle leg Like the whole time. 511 00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:28,399 Speaker 1: I was like, let me cross my legs so nobody 512 00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:30,000 Speaker 1: see what's going on. And you know, not in a 513 00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:31,520 Speaker 1: shame because I was like, I'm going to DC and 514 00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:32,040 Speaker 1: it happened. 515 00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:37,879 Speaker 2: They're like bosh AnyWho and you had a city was 516 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:40,359 Speaker 2: surfing Angelina Jolie's dad in DC. 517 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:44,159 Speaker 1: Wow, you say, now, look like Billy Billy, Bob Thornton 518 00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:44,560 Speaker 1: or whatever. 519 00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,960 Speaker 2: That's her Her dad is John Voight. I feel like 520 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,880 Speaker 2: the enemy of the state, the mean one. 521 00:23:50,119 --> 00:23:52,719 Speaker 1: That's her dad. That's her dad. Yeah, wow, I had 522 00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:55,639 Speaker 1: no idea. Yeah, they were strange though. AnyWho, I'm in 523 00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:57,719 Speaker 1: the dentist and you know, I told him I got 524 00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 1: my boobs in twice. So every time some I came 525 00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:02,760 Speaker 1: in the room, she just kept saying like she hasn't 526 00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:05,080 Speaker 1: done her Jason the over two years, like I'm over 527 00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:06,879 Speaker 1: twelve years, And I was like, I can't believe she 528 00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:09,560 Speaker 1: keeps telling him. But I was only doing X rays 529 00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:12,200 Speaker 1: so she wasn't even gonna do surgery or anything on me. 530 00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, she was like twelve and had a hickey, and 531 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:18,160 Speaker 2: she probably had like smiley faces on her nails or something. 532 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, She's like, this is my last day. I was like, 533 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:23,800 Speaker 1: uh oh freshman year, dude. That's why she was like, 534 00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,919 Speaker 1: I'm a rolling with a higgy because it's my last day. Yo, 535 00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:30,080 Speaker 1: hickey what? Yeah, I was like, what was the. 536 00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:32,080 Speaker 2: Last time you saw a hickey before you went to 537 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:34,879 Speaker 2: the dentist? Like, I haven't seen one since you know, 538 00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:37,960 Speaker 2: Flavor of Leve was on TV. That's how long ago. 539 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:39,359 Speaker 1: I feel like it was. I think I saw a 540 00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:41,480 Speaker 1: hickey like two years ago, and I was like, that 541 00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:43,720 Speaker 1: ain't an hickey. That's like syphilis or something that's like 542 00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:47,280 Speaker 1: a skin rash, that's a lept I was like, that's 543 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,600 Speaker 1: a leprosy lips. Yeah. 544 00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:52,160 Speaker 2: Like I was like, nobody does Hickey's anything. She got 545 00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:54,320 Speaker 2: old testament disease. Yeah. 546 00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,919 Speaker 1: But being there and just seeing this girl like working 547 00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:00,960 Speaker 1: towards whatever she wants in her life, I was like, damn, 548 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:03,360 Speaker 1: you know, I did not utilize school at all. 549 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:06,760 Speaker 2: Oh, school is probably going to college is probably the 550 00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,280 Speaker 2: biggest mistake I made in my life. 551 00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:11,840 Speaker 1: Really, yeah, it is inexpensive as mistake. 552 00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:15,639 Speaker 2: I should have gone to you know, like a community 553 00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:18,399 Speaker 2: ass like city college. Like I should have gone to 554 00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,680 Speaker 2: like I T T Tech and learned heating and air 555 00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:23,320 Speaker 2: or something like. I went to school for something that 556 00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:27,000 Speaker 2: I don't use. And now I'm a comedian and I 557 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:28,880 Speaker 2: don't get paid for that. Really, I mean, I'm starting 558 00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 2: to get paid for that. You are. You're like, you're 559 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:33,520 Speaker 2: doing great things. I'm paying all of my bills with comedy. 560 00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:37,119 Speaker 2: But like I'm dodging Sally May or Naviant or whoever 561 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:37,679 Speaker 2: the hell they are. 562 00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:37,879 Speaker 3: Now. 563 00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, they'd be like, you, oh, what's up money for 564 00:25:40,119 --> 00:25:42,280 Speaker 1: the month, And I'm like, I just played last month. 565 00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:44,959 Speaker 1: I mean I just talked to some girls that were 566 00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,439 Speaker 1: twenty one year old. Twenty one year olds and they 567 00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:50,560 Speaker 1: were they were in college, and I was just like, listen, 568 00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:54,239 Speaker 1: just save all those books, like read as much as 569 00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:58,840 Speaker 1: you can, like learn, like obtain everything, so if you leave, 570 00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,119 Speaker 1: you don't feel stupid, Like I can't remember any of 571 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,000 Speaker 1: the things that I learned in college. It's not about 572 00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:08,240 Speaker 1: remembering it, girl. College is this is what I think. 573 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,840 Speaker 2: I think that they make us go to college so 574 00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,040 Speaker 2: that we get into debt and then we are forced 575 00:26:14,119 --> 00:26:16,720 Speaker 2: to work to pay that debt off and never have 576 00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:17,879 Speaker 2: our own wealth. 577 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,240 Speaker 1: I feel like that's what college is. It's like it's 578 00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:23,359 Speaker 1: a trick it's a catfish. It's a business. It's a catfish. 579 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,399 Speaker 1: It's a trickery. And but I mean, some people go 580 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,320 Speaker 1: to college and they use their degree, and I just 581 00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:31,400 Speaker 1: feel like if once you figure out what you want 582 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,200 Speaker 1: to do, you definitely have to use it. 583 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:35,000 Speaker 2: I know so many people who went to college and 584 00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:38,080 Speaker 2: have jobs now in completely different fields than what they 585 00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:38,760 Speaker 2: went to school for. 586 00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:41,320 Speaker 1: And it's like, dude, you could have just like you 587 00:26:41,359 --> 00:26:42,399 Speaker 1: could have just been a phoenix. 588 00:26:42,520 --> 00:26:44,560 Speaker 2: You could got to deride. You would have saved money 589 00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:45,840 Speaker 2: and you'd still be working where you were. 590 00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:50,359 Speaker 1: I went to Bodiqua College, you know, an ABC college. 591 00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:51,040 Speaker 1: You know what I mean? 592 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:54,960 Speaker 2: Like, college is like it's a scam, yo, Like it's 593 00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:55,800 Speaker 2: a it's a racket. 594 00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:59,639 Speaker 1: You sound bitter. I am? You sound better. 595 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:02,520 Speaker 2: I should have dropped out. I had a conversation and 596 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,240 Speaker 2: Sidney was there. It was it was like Sydney and 597 00:27:05,359 --> 00:27:07,280 Speaker 2: like a couple other girls and we were talking and 598 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,920 Speaker 2: everyone in the conversation had dropped out of college and 599 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:10,359 Speaker 2: they were. 600 00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:12,280 Speaker 1: All making more money than I'm making right now. And 601 00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:14,760 Speaker 1: I finished and I was like, dang, you know what 602 00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:15,280 Speaker 1: are they doing. 603 00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:20,800 Speaker 2: No, Adrian dropped out and she's making money. Phyllis dropped out, 604 00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:24,280 Speaker 2: She's making money. You dropped out and you're making money. 605 00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:28,480 Speaker 2: Yeah as a waitress though, yes, but you're still. 606 00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:28,960 Speaker 1: Making money, dude. 607 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:31,640 Speaker 2: Like, if you were smart, you would have saved money. 608 00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:35,680 Speaker 1: I would have saved so much money. And I think 609 00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:37,840 Speaker 1: that that's what you should learn in college as well. 610 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:40,680 Speaker 2: You I learned that in high school save your money, 611 00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:42,840 Speaker 2: and then you'll know by the time you graduate from 612 00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:46,160 Speaker 2: high school that you need college because you can't save money. 613 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:50,040 Speaker 1: If you go away with cord Sally may be calling me. 614 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 1: I have her on the blocked list on my phone. 615 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:54,200 Speaker 1: Didn't your brother tell you that you guys got to 616 00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:56,440 Speaker 1: take out a loan. I'll pay your loans. 617 00:27:57,040 --> 00:28:01,080 Speaker 2: What No, I'm saying another loan out alone. I was like, 618 00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:03,560 Speaker 2: you so yeah, but that's just a dumb Haitian man. 619 00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:08,800 Speaker 1: Oh my god. Marpallu was one of those reading Rainbow kids. No, 620 00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,240 Speaker 1: I just feel like, you know, when I saw those girls, 621 00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:14,760 Speaker 1: I was like, I can't believe that I went. I 622 00:28:14,800 --> 00:28:17,680 Speaker 1: actually went to school for four years, and there's so 623 00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:21,879 Speaker 1: many experiences I went through. But you went for four years. 624 00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:22,960 Speaker 1: I don't know why. 625 00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:24,640 Speaker 2: I thought you were only there for like two or three. 626 00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:29,240 Speaker 2: You went before and then just didn't follow through. 627 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:29,640 Speaker 1: Well. 628 00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:33,080 Speaker 2: I was in Massachusetts, which sounds awful. Yeah it was. 629 00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:34,800 Speaker 1: I mean it was the first time away from home. 630 00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:37,879 Speaker 1: I was like, Ramona, can't tell me what to do 631 00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:40,160 Speaker 1: and what time I needed to be in the room, 632 00:28:40,280 --> 00:28:43,720 Speaker 1: Like yo. I was out talking to people, meeting people, 633 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:45,360 Speaker 1: banging people, going apart. 634 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,240 Speaker 2: I really bang a lot of people in college. 635 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:51,000 Speaker 1: What's a lot of people In the four years, I 636 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:52,240 Speaker 1: probably banged like four people. 637 00:28:53,120 --> 00:28:53,400 Speaker 2: Mmm. 638 00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:58,960 Speaker 1: Okay, you don't believe it. Don't believe you to this one, Okay. 639 00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:02,000 Speaker 1: I was. I had a boyfriend when I went to college. 640 00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:05,520 Speaker 1: He was banging him. He don't count. He don't count. 641 00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:08,040 Speaker 1: He doesn't count because I got him before I even 642 00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:08,720 Speaker 1: got on campus. 643 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:11,440 Speaker 2: Okay, that's got a state dick, So that didn't that. 644 00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:13,600 Speaker 1: No, okay, you're not in the state. Okay. 645 00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:15,760 Speaker 2: So it's one of those what happens in Massachusetts states 646 00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:15,960 Speaker 2: a mess. 647 00:29:16,040 --> 00:29:16,480 Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no. 648 00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:18,760 Speaker 2: I'm saying I went to college with their boyfriend. So 649 00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:21,200 Speaker 2: the first year listen, women will come up with an 650 00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:22,520 Speaker 2: excuse to not count. 651 00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:32,480 Speaker 1: I gotta lie ahead. So and then maybe three four 652 00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,920 Speaker 1: months after that, we broke up and I met another dude, 653 00:29:35,960 --> 00:29:36,720 Speaker 1: hooked up with him. 654 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,520 Speaker 2: Okay, hook up means like pea. 655 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:43,360 Speaker 1: Then met a guy who was in Philadelphia and went 656 00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:44,760 Speaker 1: to temple, hooked up with him. 657 00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:48,920 Speaker 2: Okay, that's been one year. Yeah, and so it's years 658 00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:50,640 Speaker 2: three and one year, but you told me it was four. 659 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:54,640 Speaker 1: But I held on to these guys the rest of 660 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:56,880 Speaker 1: the Yeah. So I was going back and forth between 661 00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:01,160 Speaker 1: Philly and the Massachusetts dude. And then the last year, 662 00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:02,840 Speaker 1: because I was going through a lot, I hoped that 663 00:30:02,920 --> 00:30:08,240 Speaker 1: with a freshman, Yeah, you were going through and I 664 00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:10,240 Speaker 1: got a U t I from him. Yeah, I'm sure 665 00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:11,720 Speaker 1: you did, because he was probably like in there like 666 00:30:11,760 --> 00:30:16,880 Speaker 1: a rabbit. Oh my god. And I was like, oh, 667 00:30:17,320 --> 00:30:20,840 Speaker 1: I never want to be this young again. Like it 668 00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:22,880 Speaker 1: was terrible. Did you hook up with any women when 669 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:23,520 Speaker 1: you were in college? 670 00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:24,680 Speaker 3: No? 671 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:25,600 Speaker 1: Actually? 672 00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:26,240 Speaker 3: Wow? 673 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:28,520 Speaker 1: Yeah it was crazy. You feel like that's where people 674 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:29,640 Speaker 1: say you're supposed. 675 00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:30,120 Speaker 3: To do that. Nah. 676 00:30:30,320 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 1: I was still really black at the time, so. 677 00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:35,200 Speaker 2: I don't know what that means. 678 00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:38,800 Speaker 1: I was like gay what? No way? You were like, 679 00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,400 Speaker 1: am I a gay? No? But you had already kissed 680 00:30:41,480 --> 00:30:44,600 Speaker 1: a girl before that, Yes, but I wasn't really talking 681 00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:47,600 Speaker 1: about it. And then after college, Yeah, it got wild. 682 00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:54,120 Speaker 1: It was like percocet may percocet mask fucking mass. 683 00:30:54,480 --> 00:30:54,760 Speaker 3: I was. 684 00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was hitting ladies left and right, and then 685 00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,640 Speaker 1: I was I took a break. I was like, I 686 00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,000 Speaker 1: was like, I don't know if this is really me, Yo, 687 00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:05,400 Speaker 1: you're still trying to find yourselves. Is that there's nothing 688 00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:06,160 Speaker 1: wrong with that? Marie? 689 00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:11,560 Speaker 2: Oh, okay, that's not gonna make me laugh less. 690 00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:19,480 Speaker 1: Wow, that's so funny. I don't know. I feel like 691 00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 1: we learned from mistakes. I'm doing a show next week 692 00:31:23,240 --> 00:31:25,040 Speaker 1: and the theme is I. 693 00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:28,280 Speaker 2: Have to write a letter to myself and read it, 694 00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:31,440 Speaker 2: and I have it's called the best mistake I ever made? 695 00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:31,640 Speaker 3: Oh? 696 00:31:31,720 --> 00:31:32,360 Speaker 1: Who show this? 697 00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:34,160 Speaker 2: I don't know, but it's at Joe's Pub, so it's 698 00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:34,880 Speaker 2: gonna be real cute. 699 00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:37,240 Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's great. Right, Well, you don't know 700 00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:39,320 Speaker 1: who show that is? Like, I don't know the name 701 00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:40,440 Speaker 1: off the top of my head. You know, I'm not 702 00:31:40,440 --> 00:31:42,720 Speaker 1: good with names or faces or people. For niceness, I'm 703 00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:47,360 Speaker 1: gonna come there and show my Facebook the great show 704 00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:49,600 Speaker 1: the best mistake I ever made. I was like, I 705 00:31:49,640 --> 00:31:50,440 Speaker 1: don't know, I don't know what. 706 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:52,600 Speaker 2: The best mistake I should have made was dropping out 707 00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:55,000 Speaker 2: of college when I got there with my little mini fridge. 708 00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:56,320 Speaker 2: That's what I should have done. 709 00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:56,840 Speaker 1: But I didn't do that. 710 00:31:57,280 --> 00:31:58,640 Speaker 2: What's the best mistake you've ever made? 711 00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:02,200 Speaker 1: Do you even know the best mistake I've ever made? 712 00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:06,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a real thing. I don't know what 713 00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:07,480 Speaker 2: I would say that it is. 714 00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:13,360 Speaker 1: I would say the best mistake I ever made was 715 00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:17,120 Speaker 1: See it's hard think about it. 716 00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,760 Speaker 2: Like, if you're listening to this, you should like leave 717 00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:22,320 Speaker 2: us a comment, Like after you subscribe, tell us what 718 00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,000 Speaker 2: the best mistake is that you've ever made. You got 719 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:25,840 Speaker 2: to tweet us or like leave us a comment on 720 00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:27,600 Speaker 2: the unofficial expert Instagram page. 721 00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:31,800 Speaker 1: The best mistake I ever made was like waitressing, because 722 00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,480 Speaker 1: I kind of just fell into it. I just wanted 723 00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:37,840 Speaker 1: I just need to get money because I left school 724 00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:39,320 Speaker 1: and I didn't have anything, and I was staying in 725 00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:42,680 Speaker 1: my friend's apartment in the projects, in the project, in 726 00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:47,880 Speaker 1: my projects, in their product oh yes, and it was 727 00:32:48,040 --> 00:32:51,160 Speaker 1: like it was seventy people living in that place. No yeah, 728 00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:55,160 Speaker 1: I like the roaches was like you putting five on it, 729 00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:58,760 Speaker 1: like like it was it was. It was crazy, Alexa 730 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:10,080 Speaker 1: say booms. Yeah. So so I kind of fell into it, 731 00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:15,240 Speaker 1: and like I've met so many people from waitressing. But 732 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:18,640 Speaker 1: the problem is is that I I got addicted to 733 00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:22,960 Speaker 1: you know, drugs and alcohol, and I wasted a lot 734 00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:26,760 Speaker 1: of time and money and money, and I made a 735 00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,840 Speaker 1: lot of choices that I was like, dude, it's funny 736 00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:33,440 Speaker 1: stories now, but looking back at it, I was like, shit, man, 737 00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:37,400 Speaker 1: I could have died, like on some real stuff, like 738 00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,560 Speaker 1: that time that I got roofed. I couldn't believe that 739 00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:42,720 Speaker 1: that freaking happened. Have we talked about that time on 740 00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:44,720 Speaker 1: the podcast The time you got rooted? I think so, 741 00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:46,680 Speaker 1: but you laughed at it, So it was you know, 742 00:33:46,720 --> 00:33:48,120 Speaker 1: it wasn't ceiling. It's so funny. 743 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:51,520 Speaker 2: City got roofed. It was hilarious. 744 00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:54,040 Speaker 1: Well, what happened was I went to I was going 745 00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:55,920 Speaker 1: to clubs by myself a lot because I was tired 746 00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:56,800 Speaker 1: of waiting for my friends. 747 00:33:56,880 --> 00:34:00,960 Speaker 2: See that's like, that's crazy to me. Why because people 748 00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:04,240 Speaker 2: tried like, you're an attractive woman. You out you know, 749 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:06,400 Speaker 2: it's not like you're sitting there not drinking and getting 750 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,120 Speaker 2: like turned up. People see you like, you. 751 00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:11,759 Speaker 1: Know, afraid of bicycle finger popping at the club. I 752 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:15,600 Speaker 1: mean it can happen at the spot. But I knew 753 00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:17,920 Speaker 1: all the bartenders, I knew the security guard. I was 754 00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:20,120 Speaker 1: going to clubs that like, people knew me, and I 755 00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:22,600 Speaker 1: was very well known, like in the circuit, you know. 756 00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:24,239 Speaker 1: So yeah, they were like, look at her, look at her, 757 00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:28,479 Speaker 1: Look la look, and you're like, I love this son. 758 00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:30,080 Speaker 1: Yeah that was me. 759 00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:31,160 Speaker 3: So I was. 760 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:34,640 Speaker 1: I always felt secure, I you know, I know how 761 00:34:34,719 --> 00:34:38,440 Speaker 1: much to drink? Well no, I did not. I felt 762 00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:41,720 Speaker 1: like secure in myself that nobody was gonna try anything stupid. 763 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,960 Speaker 1: And the one night that I wasn't even drinking that much, 764 00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:50,320 Speaker 1: I put my beer down, chatted it up with the bartender, 765 00:34:50,680 --> 00:34:53,680 Speaker 1: walked away for a second, came back, drank the beer 766 00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:56,359 Speaker 1: some more. Wait, you left the beer at the bar, 767 00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:59,600 Speaker 1: you see, that's what you messed up? Sis, Sis, that 768 00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:00,320 Speaker 1: was on you. 769 00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:02,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, well, first of all, why would you not take 770 00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:02,880 Speaker 2: the beer with you? 771 00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:05,400 Speaker 1: Beers not even heavy? Because I was dancing. 772 00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:06,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, you can dance with a. 773 00:35:06,360 --> 00:35:06,799 Speaker 1: Beer in your hand. 774 00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:08,640 Speaker 2: I see people doing. I see Puerto Rican people dude 775 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:10,600 Speaker 2: all the time. When they cut it on nots, they'd 776 00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:17,160 Speaker 2: be like yeah, but they'd be like this, they're twirling 777 00:35:17,239 --> 00:35:20,120 Speaker 2: and doing the whatever with their beer in their hand. 778 00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:24,640 Speaker 1: I was just really surprised that I knew. Well, no, 779 00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:28,200 Speaker 1: I wasn't surprised because I had tried Roofie before, so 780 00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:31,320 Speaker 1: I knew the feeling of it. And soon as I 781 00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:35,040 Speaker 1: started feeling weird, I was like, oh shit, oh shit, 782 00:35:35,239 --> 00:35:37,360 Speaker 1: this is really happening. So who do you think Roofie 783 00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:39,080 Speaker 1: do you? Because it doesn't seem it was probably a 784 00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:40,840 Speaker 1: dude who saw that you were there about yourself. No, 785 00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:42,560 Speaker 1: but it was a gay party. It was all It 786 00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:44,520 Speaker 1: was all gay man. Okay, that doesn't mean anything. 787 00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:46,480 Speaker 2: Maybe a gay dude put it in because he thought 788 00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:48,960 Speaker 2: it was another dude dude's beer. And then you may 789 00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:51,440 Speaker 2: they were like or maybe he thought you were cute 790 00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:52,799 Speaker 2: and then you shoot around and he was like, oh, 791 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:53,399 Speaker 2: that's a chick. 792 00:35:53,520 --> 00:35:58,160 Speaker 1: I was my roof God on that man, that lady. Yeah, 793 00:35:58,680 --> 00:36:02,120 Speaker 1: there's so many possibility, but I'm sure when it happened, 794 00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:05,239 Speaker 1: he was probably upstairs waiting, like damn, this nigga not. 795 00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:06,040 Speaker 2: Passed out yet. 796 00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:09,799 Speaker 1: He's like, uh no, there's a bitch downstairs passed out. 797 00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:13,279 Speaker 1: He's liked, whoop, well gotta go. Let me call my 798 00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:19,600 Speaker 1: car service. You gotta go, sinks sinks. Yeah, So I 799 00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:21,840 Speaker 1: was down. I was. I went in the basement of 800 00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:24,279 Speaker 1: the club because I was like so confident that I 801 00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:25,759 Speaker 1: was like, you know what, I'm just gonna pee this 802 00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:30,840 Speaker 1: out the basement. Okay, you see this, Sydney, This story 803 00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:32,319 Speaker 1: that you're telling us sounds very. 804 00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:37,640 Speaker 2: White woman in a Lifetime Original movie because everything that 805 00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:38,200 Speaker 2: you're doing. 806 00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:40,120 Speaker 1: If I was watching it on TV, I but like, 807 00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:43,640 Speaker 1: you so dumb, oh man. Every time I tell the story, 808 00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:45,840 Speaker 1: I'm just like whenever you see a girl in a 809 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:48,759 Speaker 1: scary movie and they're running up the addicts, like, why 810 00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,439 Speaker 1: are you doing that? Where they're running in the woods, 811 00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:51,680 Speaker 1: It's like you're in the woods. 812 00:36:51,760 --> 00:36:54,200 Speaker 2: Nobody can hear you like you found like a dark 813 00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:56,239 Speaker 2: corner on the main floor that you could have peed on. 814 00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:01,399 Speaker 1: No, And I'm just lucky that nothing happen at all. 815 00:37:02,160 --> 00:37:04,560 Speaker 1: It sounds like nothing happened at all. No, nothing, nothing. 816 00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:06,279 Speaker 1: And it was kind of like at the end of you, 817 00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:10,719 Speaker 1: like nothing happened. I had pulled my pants down in 818 00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:15,200 Speaker 1: everything that's crazy. I was laid underneath the toilet like 819 00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:22,480 Speaker 1: cap passa like what a good bus. Yeah, I guess 820 00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:25,080 Speaker 1: I was my worst Yeah, waitressing just it got me 821 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:28,359 Speaker 1: into the world of like best mistic ever. 822 00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:30,120 Speaker 2: I don't know what my best mistake ever was. 823 00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:30,600 Speaker 1: I don't know. 824 00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,239 Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, I really haven't been thinking about it, 825 00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:35,560 Speaker 2: even though the show is like in exactly a week, 826 00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,600 Speaker 2: less than a week because it's like next Wednesday. So 827 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:40,839 Speaker 2: I have to write it's five to eight minutes. 828 00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:43,520 Speaker 1: Okay, but I just have to write the whole thing out. 829 00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:44,880 Speaker 1: They want me to read it. I'm like, can I 830 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:46,880 Speaker 1: just perform five to eight minutes? Can I do like 831 00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,200 Speaker 1: a tight eight minute set? They're like, you have to 832 00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:52,440 Speaker 1: read a letter? You got it? I I think you 833 00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:54,480 Speaker 1: got it. Well, I don't know, dude, I think you 834 00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:57,880 Speaker 1: got yo. Maria's like you were an expert of pulling 835 00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:00,080 Speaker 1: stuff out your ass and making it look like it 836 00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:02,640 Speaker 1: was prepared for like twelve years. Oh yeah, right, this 837 00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:05,000 Speaker 1: has been marinating. This has been you know, sitting on 838 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,760 Speaker 1: the back. It's so good, like you were last minute 839 00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:10,080 Speaker 1: lassie and you know how to like work it. 840 00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,440 Speaker 2: I mean, I work best under pressure. 841 00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:12,960 Speaker 3: You do. 842 00:38:13,239 --> 00:38:15,200 Speaker 1: So I'm probably go write the letter on Tuesday. I've 843 00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:20,440 Speaker 1: seen you in my short notice. You're like where I'm 844 00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,879 Speaker 1: gonna find his video. It's like, bitch, you already had 845 00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:25,080 Speaker 1: a video. That's how prepared you are. 846 00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:29,279 Speaker 2: It's a crazy I mean, that's that's just the way 847 00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:32,960 Speaker 2: that my life is right now. Hopefully one day I'll 848 00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:34,680 Speaker 2: settle down and figure out how to be a big 849 00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:37,560 Speaker 2: like a mature adult and figure. 850 00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:38,920 Speaker 1: My life out, you know what I mean. Yeah, I 851 00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:42,080 Speaker 1: mean maybe maybe I can of getting your life together whatever. 852 00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:44,800 Speaker 1: Do you have any summer goals? Yes? My goal for 853 00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:46,400 Speaker 1: the summer is to go on thirty dates. 854 00:38:48,360 --> 00:38:51,080 Speaker 2: That's my entire goal for the summer, is cause you know, 855 00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:53,960 Speaker 2: I'm single af except I don't really know if I'm 856 00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:57,719 Speaker 2: single now because I got the messuse dude, that's my 857 00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:02,120 Speaker 2: man now. But I yeah, I set this. I have 858 00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:03,520 Speaker 2: this idea in my mind that I want to go 859 00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:07,600 Speaker 2: on thirty dates in thirty days, not thirty days straight, 860 00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:09,400 Speaker 2: because you know, I got shows and I'm busy and 861 00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:12,000 Speaker 2: sometimes I need a night off. But I'm gonna do 862 00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,759 Speaker 2: thirty dates this summer with thirty people that I don't know, 863 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:19,160 Speaker 2: and I maybe I'll wear thirty different wigs. I'm not 864 00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:22,520 Speaker 2: sure what looks I'm gonna be serving, but that's the plan. 865 00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:24,759 Speaker 2: I'm gonna vlog before the date and then I'm gonna 866 00:39:24,760 --> 00:39:27,520 Speaker 2: blog after, and then I'm gonna wait until the end 867 00:39:27,600 --> 00:39:29,920 Speaker 2: of all the dates and then I'll I'll load all 868 00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:31,840 Speaker 2: those videos online and the catches. 869 00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:34,480 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be fine as some of these dudes for you. 870 00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:36,640 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna look at the profile and I'm gonna 871 00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:36,920 Speaker 1: help you. 872 00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:38,879 Speaker 2: Well, that's the thing that people don't know and people 873 00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,440 Speaker 2: don't believe about me, is I don't do any of 874 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:43,960 Speaker 2: the apps, Like I don't have tender. I've never been 875 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:46,880 Speaker 2: on Bumble or Okay, cube it or none of these websites. 876 00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:49,160 Speaker 2: And people are like how, and I'm like, I'm pretty 877 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:51,800 Speaker 2: So I don't do any of that stuff because I 878 00:39:51,840 --> 00:39:53,799 Speaker 2: don't need to. But I want to do this because 879 00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:56,879 Speaker 2: I feel like it'll be some interesting ass stories, because 880 00:39:56,880 --> 00:39:57,799 Speaker 2: I'm sure some of the men. 881 00:39:57,760 --> 00:39:59,319 Speaker 1: Will be awful terrible. 882 00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:01,279 Speaker 2: Someone's gonna show up in the middle of July in 883 00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,120 Speaker 2: like a leather jodasy vest, and I feel like. 884 00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:06,160 Speaker 1: It's gonna be funny. I feel like, as a waitress, 885 00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:09,880 Speaker 1: you think it's gonna be funny, but I've served so 886 00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:13,880 Speaker 1: many tender dates or like app dates, and it always 887 00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:17,279 Speaker 1: turns out so bad, Like the guy will have three 888 00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:19,759 Speaker 1: dates set up that whole night for like in the 889 00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:23,200 Speaker 1: same place. I'm like, you are bold, Joseph, you are 890 00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:25,680 Speaker 1: so bold. And then like that, we sitting there and 891 00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:28,319 Speaker 1: they're talking and you would think like something's gonna pop off, 892 00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:30,480 Speaker 1: like oh, she gonna she's gonna pull her titty out, 893 00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:33,120 Speaker 1: like they've been drinking. They she's had like three Facon 894 00:40:33,239 --> 00:40:36,480 Speaker 1: SODA's already and it's only six thirty. And then she'll 895 00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:38,600 Speaker 1: be like, well, gotta go out bye, and he's like 896 00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:41,160 Speaker 1: that's it, Like, yeah, that's it. I'm all about shutting 897 00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:43,440 Speaker 1: somebody down. You go sit them them fodcon SODA's on 898 00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:47,360 Speaker 1: a full stomach, real slow. They won't hit you before exactly, 899 00:40:47,440 --> 00:40:50,399 Speaker 1: they won't hit you until you leave. I had one 900 00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:54,120 Speaker 1: guy that like he would come every week and uh, 901 00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:58,480 Speaker 1: He's like, listen, I'm gonna to drinks, Max. That's it. 902 00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:01,680 Speaker 1: That's all we're doing. To drinks, one for me, one 903 00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:05,200 Speaker 1: for her, maybe one other for her, and then I'm 904 00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:07,399 Speaker 1: not gonna get anything else. He doesn't want to spend 905 00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:10,239 Speaker 1: too much. This chick order try to order like an 906 00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:14,120 Speaker 1: appetizer or something. He was like no, he said no. 907 00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:17,640 Speaker 2: He was like no, I mean, listen, if it's a 908 00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:21,360 Speaker 2: first day, if if somebody whoever is paying, that's not 909 00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:24,080 Speaker 2: your discretion. Just know that you're not gonna get no 910 00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:26,200 Speaker 2: KitKat from Marie after that. 911 00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:28,719 Speaker 1: Yeah, but you were gonna get any kick cat somebody 912 00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:29,279 Speaker 1: could have gave you. 913 00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:31,920 Speaker 2: For let and everything people have given me stick And 914 00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:34,319 Speaker 2: then I'd been like, all right, I need to go walk. 915 00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:39,040 Speaker 1: You could have got lobster and shrimps and nothing. Ld 916 00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:39,719 Speaker 1: you pay for my food. 917 00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:41,680 Speaker 2: That doesn't mean I owe you anything exact And just 918 00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:43,440 Speaker 2: because we went out three times doesn't mean I owe 919 00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:45,759 Speaker 2: you anything. Then like I'll hear women talking and they're like, 920 00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:48,480 Speaker 2: well we went out three it's a third day, so 921 00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:50,640 Speaker 2: obviously I have to sleep with him and I'd be like, girl, 922 00:41:50,840 --> 00:41:54,640 Speaker 2: what yeah, I mean, like, what type of sex arithmetic 923 00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:56,920 Speaker 2: are you doing that? I'm not like, That's not how 924 00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:58,680 Speaker 2: my work problem stacked up. 925 00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:01,560 Speaker 1: Lucky for me, I would only date people that I 926 00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:04,440 Speaker 1: would want to fuck on the first night. I didn't 927 00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:08,439 Speaker 1: believe in that third third day thing. I'm not bound 928 00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:09,919 Speaker 1: to any of that bullshit. Listen. 929 00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:12,160 Speaker 2: I constantly go up people that I don't like, so 930 00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:15,600 Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm in it for the long haul. Listen, 931 00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:17,560 Speaker 2: as long as you mind me food and paying for 932 00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:19,640 Speaker 2: these rosees, we can see each other again. Just know 933 00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:22,720 Speaker 2: that you can't touch my hand or caress my cheek 934 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,759 Speaker 2: or lean into close, because you're gonna get your feelings hurt. 935 00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:29,920 Speaker 1: As somebody who's gone on plenty of dates, I should 936 00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:31,960 Speaker 1: have thought about that. I would only go on dates 937 00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:34,800 Speaker 1: with people that I actually like, and I should have 938 00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:38,399 Speaker 1: utilized just going out and dating more. I didn't date enough. 939 00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:41,680 Speaker 1: I dated only people I was gonna hook up with. 940 00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:44,880 Speaker 1: There was a couple of people that tried to slide in, 941 00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:45,320 Speaker 1: and I'm. 942 00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:46,400 Speaker 2: Like, no, no, no, no no no no no no 943 00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:49,239 Speaker 2: no no no no no no no no no no 944 00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:51,200 Speaker 2: no no no no no no no no no no 945 00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:51,960 Speaker 2: no no no. 946 00:42:52,120 --> 00:42:54,320 Speaker 1: No no no no no no no no no no 947 00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:57,279 Speaker 1: no no no no no. I was like no. 948 00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:00,480 Speaker 2: But for the most part, listen, it's somebody is like 949 00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:02,759 Speaker 2: a hideous hunchback of Notre Dame based. 950 00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:04,520 Speaker 1: I'm obviously not gonna sit across from you watch you 951 00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:06,920 Speaker 1: show your food like a cow girl. That was two 952 00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:16,600 Speaker 1: ex boyfriends ago. Oops swinks, But like you're young and like, 953 00:43:16,880 --> 00:43:19,600 Speaker 1: I don't know, like it's it's gonna be nice out 954 00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:24,280 Speaker 1: I figure it's thirty days, so that's probably like twenty 955 00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:26,440 Speaker 1: two outfits because you know, I'm gonna repeat some and 956 00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:29,920 Speaker 1: that's I don't know, probably sixty drinks at least and 957 00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:35,279 Speaker 1: some meals. Girl, what these dudes like they've caught on? 958 00:43:35,760 --> 00:43:38,000 Speaker 1: I feel like because women have talked about it too much, 959 00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:40,000 Speaker 1: like oh yeah, I'm just going to get something to eat, 960 00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:41,719 Speaker 1: and they'll be like, no, we going. I'm gonna meet 961 00:43:41,719 --> 00:43:43,719 Speaker 1: you at a cafe Sydney. I am a queen. We 962 00:43:43,800 --> 00:43:44,879 Speaker 1: want to get the eat. 963 00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:47,160 Speaker 2: Then that's two teas. Okay, I'm gonna take a Hibiscuits 964 00:43:47,239 --> 00:43:51,719 Speaker 2: tea and the Jasmine tea. You better get you a croissants, 965 00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:55,840 Speaker 2: you know, get you a chromat little Chocolate croissant, and 966 00:43:55,920 --> 00:43:59,120 Speaker 2: then I'm gonna go like I feel like the conversations 967 00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:02,680 Speaker 2: might to something like a like an epiphany in my 968 00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:05,360 Speaker 2: mind or something. And if the dates are terrible, that 969 00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:08,880 Speaker 2: means the story is gonna be danging. I hope the 970 00:44:08,960 --> 00:44:12,600 Speaker 2: dates are bad. I hope his car gets declined, because 971 00:44:12,600 --> 00:44:13,879 Speaker 2: you know, I'm gonna sit there and be like, well, 972 00:44:13,880 --> 00:44:16,520 Speaker 2: you know I didn't pay any money. I'm gonna just 973 00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:18,520 Speaker 2: look at him like, oh, you're gonna end up dead 974 00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:22,880 Speaker 2: on a twelfth Datena be looking for your body. I'm like, 975 00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:24,720 Speaker 2: I told her it's a bad idea. 976 00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:26,800 Speaker 1: He said, it's not worth it. 977 00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,320 Speaker 2: I'm staying on the island of Manhattan. And then like 978 00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:31,360 Speaker 2: in like the cool Brooklyn parks. I'm not gonna go 979 00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:33,759 Speaker 2: to like Queen's for a date. And I'm not gonna 980 00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:36,920 Speaker 2: I'm not gonna go like to Westchester or whatever, Like 981 00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,359 Speaker 2: I'm just gonna stay here. I'm not going to Jersey City. 982 00:44:39,640 --> 00:44:42,879 Speaker 2: I'm not taking no ferry to no date. Just it's 983 00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:46,120 Speaker 2: gonna be me and him or maybe she, because if 984 00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:47,800 Speaker 2: City's gonna have to pick these dates, I feel like 985 00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:50,800 Speaker 2: she's gonna set me apart. I'm like, dude, I'm like 986 00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:52,880 Speaker 2: I'm gonna walk in in Some Asian ladies gonna be like, 987 00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:54,440 Speaker 2: here are you, Marie, And I'm gonna be like, oh, 988 00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:58,560 Speaker 2: kill god. Listen, is she wiring food? You're not gonna 989 00:44:58,960 --> 00:44:59,879 Speaker 2: I'm I'm gonna step. 990 00:45:02,480 --> 00:45:04,319 Speaker 1: Is that a really nice restaurant? You're not gonna say. 991 00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:06,720 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be like, hey, Christy, I'm a Gucci you cute. 992 00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:13,239 Speaker 1: Let me just get the crusted promisan chicken breast. Can 993 00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:17,439 Speaker 1: I get some garnish, some lemon zest is the brick 994 00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:18,400 Speaker 1: of Tonica today? 995 00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:20,759 Speaker 2: Whatever's market price, I'm letting lady paid for it. 996 00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:25,200 Speaker 1: Wow, you don't understand how lesbians were. Girl, it'd be 997 00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:29,000 Speaker 1: half on half on half half how lesbians paid for 998 00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:31,239 Speaker 1: and half on one half. Well, if she looked like 999 00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:35,960 Speaker 1: she still might make you pay half. And I'll be like, 1000 00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:37,319 Speaker 1: you know what, I'm feeling a little ill. 1001 00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:39,120 Speaker 2: I'm gonna go get outside and get some air and 1002 00:45:39,200 --> 00:45:41,239 Speaker 2: then I'm dipping girl. 1003 00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:42,080 Speaker 1: Good luck. 1004 00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:43,279 Speaker 2: I'm gonna pray for you. 1005 00:45:43,560 --> 00:45:44,439 Speaker 1: I'm gonna do that. Listen. 1006 00:45:44,480 --> 00:45:46,839 Speaker 2: I'm gonna wear my little lesbian wig that day. I'm 1007 00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:51,879 Speaker 2: gonna wear my my my corn rope Chamar Moore lace 1008 00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:52,640 Speaker 2: front wig. 1009 00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:55,560 Speaker 1: That day You're honestly one of the rudest people that 1010 00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:57,160 Speaker 1: I've met in my entire life. 1011 00:45:57,239 --> 00:45:59,840 Speaker 2: That is a lie, because you've met famous people, and 1012 00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:01,360 Speaker 2: famous people were awful. 1013 00:46:02,880 --> 00:46:06,440 Speaker 1: I mean the fact that I've had to serve Cameron 1014 00:46:07,320 --> 00:46:11,000 Speaker 1: numerous times. I don't know what's I don't know where 1015 00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:12,799 Speaker 1: my life is right now. Yeah, I mean, I guess 1016 00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:16,320 Speaker 1: waitressing is the best mistake he's ever made. It really is. 1017 00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:18,680 Speaker 1: I have so many stories, but at the same time, 1018 00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:21,439 Speaker 1: I'm like, I just wish I wasn't there at all. Yeah, 1019 00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:22,279 Speaker 1: but the stories are good. 1020 00:46:22,360 --> 00:46:27,080 Speaker 2: Dude, what's your most memorable celebrity guest? Would you say, 1021 00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:31,640 Speaker 2: because you've served everybody? Bruce Willis Bruce Willis, okay, well 1022 00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:32,919 Speaker 2: he's nice because he seems nice. 1023 00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:35,680 Speaker 1: Okay, First of all, everybody was pressed. They were so 1024 00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:40,920 Speaker 1: it was like after die Hard, die Hard. Bruce Willis, 1025 00:46:40,960 --> 00:46:43,239 Speaker 1: so he's you know, he's tall. He is he tall, 1026 00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:49,600 Speaker 1: He's really tall. That makes like tall and like all 1027 00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:51,920 Speaker 1: he he would come in all the time, and apparently 1028 00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:56,960 Speaker 1: he had went out with a waitress and that we yeah, 1029 00:46:57,040 --> 00:46:59,200 Speaker 1: he had already went on a couple of days with 1030 00:46:59,280 --> 00:47:01,640 Speaker 1: a waitress. But you would come in, all the girls 1031 00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:04,080 Speaker 1: would flock because they're like, it's Bruce and they would 1032 00:47:04,120 --> 00:47:05,840 Speaker 1: just call him Bruce. I'm like, you're not gonna call 1033 00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:10,080 Speaker 1: him Bruce. Willis no Bruce Bruce. And we're at the bar. 1034 00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:13,640 Speaker 1: He's getting patrolling platinum shots for the waitresses, which is 1035 00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:15,120 Speaker 1: like a sixty dollars shot. 1036 00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:16,640 Speaker 2: Bruce got it diehard? 1037 00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:19,959 Speaker 1: Oh yeah? Absolutely. The thing is that he wasn't paying 1038 00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:21,440 Speaker 1: for it though he would just ask for it. And 1039 00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:23,600 Speaker 1: then when it's telling to give him, you're like, we're 1040 00:47:23,640 --> 00:47:25,640 Speaker 1: not going to get Bruce a check. It's Bruce. It's like, 1041 00:47:25,920 --> 00:47:28,160 Speaker 1: what that's the person you should get to check due. 1042 00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:30,800 Speaker 2: Absolutely, don't give the check to camera. 1043 00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,400 Speaker 1: You know he ain't got it. Oh, he ain't gamba 1044 00:47:34,120 --> 00:47:35,160 Speaker 1: that the check. 1045 00:47:38,520 --> 00:47:38,560 Speaker 3: No. 1046 00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:42,960 Speaker 1: So so he sees me I'm new and he's like, oh, 1047 00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:45,520 Speaker 1: you must be a new waitress here. Oh I haven't 1048 00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:49,279 Speaker 1: tasted that chuck. He touched my shoulder like he want 1049 00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:53,080 Speaker 1: to smash No. But he's trying to tell me this story. 1050 00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:54,520 Speaker 1: He's like, can I'll tell you what happened to me? 1051 00:47:54,960 --> 00:47:57,440 Speaker 1: He tells me this corny ass, black ass story. But 1052 00:47:57,560 --> 00:47:59,960 Speaker 1: basically the story leads to him touching up. 1053 00:48:00,080 --> 00:48:01,759 Speaker 2: But wait, that's the end. 1054 00:48:01,760 --> 00:48:04,480 Speaker 1: Of the story. But he's like, yeah, and the girl 1055 00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:07,440 Speaker 1: did this, and he does, but he cupped it. 1056 00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:11,600 Speaker 2: He cupped That is how old white men better do it. 1057 00:48:11,800 --> 00:48:16,480 Speaker 1: No, dude, I was like I was, But did you 1058 00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:19,600 Speaker 1: lean in or lean out of the hand? I mean 1059 00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:20,560 Speaker 1: I puked the butt out. 1060 00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:22,759 Speaker 2: Hey, I didn't arch that bad. I didn't suck it in. 1061 00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:25,200 Speaker 2: I said, we already here. 1062 00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:34,040 Speaker 1: How did cat here? Alexa? Can I get a round 1063 00:48:34,080 --> 00:48:34,680 Speaker 1: of applause? 1064 00:48:36,680 --> 00:48:37,840 Speaker 3: Hmmm, I don't know that. 1065 00:48:38,360 --> 00:48:41,120 Speaker 1: Oh well, no, I know she doesn't be rude Alexa. 1066 00:48:41,719 --> 00:48:49,960 Speaker 1: Applause please, Ah, Alexa, you suck Wait, try one more time. 1067 00:48:50,840 --> 00:48:53,560 Speaker 3: Or technical feedback through the Alexa as you. 1068 00:48:53,600 --> 00:49:03,560 Speaker 1: Know, I will alexa my applause please after fifty five tries. 1069 00:49:04,120 --> 00:49:07,239 Speaker 1: Finally anyway, So Bruce Willis touched your butt and you 1070 00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:09,799 Speaker 1: like arched your back, Yeah, and did. 1071 00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:11,880 Speaker 2: For a second you think I'm asleep with Bruce Willis. 1072 00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:15,239 Speaker 1: No, definitely not. I mean he goes there so many times, 1073 00:49:15,239 --> 00:49:16,960 Speaker 1: and he had already went on a couple of day. 1074 00:49:17,000 --> 00:49:19,200 Speaker 1: He took one of the chicks to a hockey game. 1075 00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:20,439 Speaker 2: Oh that's cute. 1076 00:49:20,520 --> 00:49:22,400 Speaker 1: He was at the Rangers game. Oh maybe you think 1077 00:49:22,440 --> 00:49:23,839 Speaker 1: it was the same hockey game. That I was at 1078 00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:27,359 Speaker 1: most likely not because this was before your time young 1079 00:49:27,480 --> 00:49:30,360 Speaker 1: and okay, well my game I went in twenty fifteen 1080 00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:32,680 Speaker 1: or something like that. No, this was yeah, this was 1081 00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:35,279 Speaker 1: like two thousand and eight or something. Yeah, that's definitely 1082 00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:37,479 Speaker 1: my time. Yeah, yeah, no, yeah, he touched my button 1083 00:49:37,480 --> 00:49:39,320 Speaker 1: and I was like, wow, like, is this what we 1084 00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:42,360 Speaker 1: really doing here touching people's butts? Did you laugh it 1085 00:49:42,440 --> 00:49:47,120 Speaker 1: off or you're like cool, story bro? I was like, 1086 00:49:47,800 --> 00:49:49,880 Speaker 1: did that really happen to me? I was like, am 1087 00:49:49,920 --> 00:49:52,359 Speaker 1: I drunk? And I was not drunk? But my question 1088 00:49:52,480 --> 00:49:54,520 Speaker 1: to you is did you say something to Bruce. 1089 00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:55,279 Speaker 3: No? 1090 00:49:55,680 --> 00:49:58,000 Speaker 1: I just I was like, well, booces woolss touched my butt, 1091 00:49:58,120 --> 00:50:01,440 Speaker 1: so whatever. And he was single at the time, so 1092 00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:04,000 Speaker 1: it's not like he's out here touching butts and he's married. 1093 00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:08,440 Speaker 2: Okay, so if he's not married, then he can touch butts. 1094 00:50:09,520 --> 00:50:12,040 Speaker 1: I just wish there was a better climax to the story. 1095 00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:14,000 Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, because I'm waiting for the end. I'm 1096 00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:16,200 Speaker 2: right upstairs with Bruce. And then like he couldn't get 1097 00:50:16,239 --> 00:50:17,439 Speaker 2: it up, Like, what's the end. 1098 00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:19,480 Speaker 1: Of the story. It's just him touching my butt, that's it. 1099 00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:21,759 Speaker 2: And then he laughed real loud, and you laughed the 1100 00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:24,399 Speaker 2: hard at his terrible story and then you walked away 1101 00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:26,680 Speaker 2: and he didn't have to pay for them. For George 1102 00:50:26,680 --> 00:50:28,160 Speaker 2: shot no, And that's the thing. 1103 00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:29,520 Speaker 1: I was like, you want to touch button and then 1104 00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:33,440 Speaker 1: you're not gonna give a tip. He wasn't tipping, no, girl. 1105 00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:38,360 Speaker 1: He was out, oh, like out like the light. I 1106 00:50:38,440 --> 00:50:39,840 Speaker 1: want to be that rich. I want to be so 1107 00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:42,280 Speaker 1: rich that I don't have to pay for stuff. 1108 00:50:42,280 --> 00:50:44,359 Speaker 2: But I feel like I'm still going to Like they 1109 00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:46,440 Speaker 2: hooked white celebrities with stuff that they don't hook black 1110 00:50:46,440 --> 00:50:46,920 Speaker 2: celebrities on. 1111 00:50:47,120 --> 00:50:48,680 Speaker 1: No, they hook everybody up. 1112 00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:51,320 Speaker 2: Serena Williams. It just came out like a couple of 1113 00:50:51,320 --> 00:50:53,719 Speaker 2: weeks ago that she bought a bunch of stuff at 1114 00:50:53,760 --> 00:50:56,879 Speaker 2: some store and it's customary after you spent a certain 1115 00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:58,800 Speaker 2: amount of money that they like send you free stuff. 1116 00:50:59,239 --> 00:51:02,200 Speaker 2: And they didn't give her nothing. Her pulses like came 1117 00:51:02,239 --> 00:51:04,640 Speaker 2: out and said something and they're like, oh, sorry about that, 1118 00:51:04,760 --> 00:51:07,120 Speaker 2: so so so sorry, so sorry, and it's in her 1119 00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:08,399 Speaker 2: like a pack of socks or something. 1120 00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:10,480 Speaker 1: Well, that's freaking rude. 1121 00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:12,840 Speaker 2: Serena Williams, She's like one of the shop athletes in 1122 00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:13,520 Speaker 2: the world. 1123 00:51:13,680 --> 00:51:16,320 Speaker 1: Is it a maternity line or is it like a regulass, 1124 00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:17,719 Speaker 1: like she can't even fit our shit. 1125 00:51:17,840 --> 00:51:19,040 Speaker 2: Anyway, it doesn't matter. 1126 00:51:19,520 --> 00:51:22,800 Speaker 1: It doesn't matter if Maria shared a pova or I 1127 00:51:22,840 --> 00:51:25,439 Speaker 1: don't know whatever, it's a terrible witch. 1128 00:51:25,680 --> 00:51:29,120 Speaker 2: Like what white tennis player came up. They'd be like, yes, Maria, 1129 00:51:30,239 --> 00:51:34,160 Speaker 2: here's some more stuff. She want an iPhone nine that's 1130 00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:37,200 Speaker 2: also free. It's like, it's it's different. They don't unless 1131 00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:37,680 Speaker 2: you're Beyonce. 1132 00:51:37,840 --> 00:51:41,760 Speaker 1: They don't treat other black celebrities like they treat white celebrities. 1133 00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:43,960 Speaker 1: That's what you think, dude. But like I'm gone to 1134 00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:47,440 Speaker 1: a lot of hood parties, a lot of like like 1135 00:51:47,640 --> 00:51:49,680 Speaker 1: Diddy's parties. Like people ain't paying. 1136 00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:53,719 Speaker 2: Oh I have another story, like you're hood famous, like 1137 00:51:53,800 --> 00:51:56,839 Speaker 2: at a hood place they know, we know who these 1138 00:51:56,880 --> 00:51:58,520 Speaker 2: people are. So yeah, you're gonna hook them up as 1139 00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:00,520 Speaker 2: you think they gonna come back and they're gonna bring 1140 00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:00,920 Speaker 2: money to you. 1141 00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:03,600 Speaker 1: But like, like it's different, you know what I mean? 1142 00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:07,200 Speaker 1: Something else? I mean Lyddy Kravitz did not pay when he. 1143 00:52:07,320 --> 00:52:10,799 Speaker 2: Was Lenny Kravit is half Jewish. He wasn't playing an 1144 00:52:10,840 --> 00:52:12,280 Speaker 2: opinion anyway. 1145 00:52:12,160 --> 00:52:15,959 Speaker 1: He did not pay. Uh, I'm gonna tell the story, 1146 00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:17,840 Speaker 1: but I'm not gonna never mind, I'm not gonna tell you. 1147 00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:19,600 Speaker 1: But I started telling the story. We only got a 1148 00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:24,160 Speaker 1: couple more minutes. Go ahead, tell the story, ready, go, No, 1149 00:52:24,239 --> 00:52:25,680 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna tell the story. But I have another 1150 00:52:25,719 --> 00:52:28,800 Speaker 1: story about when jay Z came. He was coming on 1151 00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:32,239 Speaker 1: a regular and his manager, no, his tour manager was 1152 00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:35,200 Speaker 1: with him, and they were really nice. I'm hanging out 1153 00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:38,040 Speaker 1: with them. I'm trinking, drinking shots or whatever, but didd 1154 00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:40,120 Speaker 1: he was having a party at this place called M 1155 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:42,200 Speaker 1: two and he's like, Yo, you want to come? And 1156 00:52:42,280 --> 00:52:44,920 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, absolutely, I was. I literally got 1157 00:52:44,960 --> 00:52:46,840 Speaker 1: off work and I was like, I'm going with jay Z. 1158 00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:49,440 Speaker 1: I'm going with did like I'm I'm to hang out 1159 00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:51,240 Speaker 1: with everybody tomorrow. 1160 00:52:51,520 --> 00:52:51,759 Speaker 2: Yes. 1161 00:52:52,000 --> 00:52:53,880 Speaker 1: Yeah. I was like, I'm about to be on Central 1162 00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:57,680 Speaker 1: Pay like on Saturday. So we get out. I'm in 1163 00:52:57,800 --> 00:53:01,520 Speaker 1: the cab with the tour manager, Dusty white guy, I 1164 00:53:01,600 --> 00:53:04,360 Speaker 1: mean very like, oh, you work at kmart, Like you 1165 00:53:04,360 --> 00:53:07,719 Speaker 1: wouldn't even know that he's a freaking tour manager. So 1166 00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:10,640 Speaker 1: we in the cab. He's talking to me. I'm like, oh, 1167 00:53:10,760 --> 00:53:12,719 Speaker 1: he's not interested. I hope he's just like trying to 1168 00:53:12,760 --> 00:53:14,680 Speaker 1: take me to the party because it's cool. So I 1169 00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:18,800 Speaker 1: go there. I have on the best pleathor pants on 1170 00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:24,320 Speaker 1: pleasas something about the pants I knew Cartney, Oh bitch, 1171 00:53:24,640 --> 00:53:27,880 Speaker 1: you know it was like limited edition rainbow like it 1172 00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:30,920 Speaker 1: was beautiful. So I going to this club. We go 1173 00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:34,920 Speaker 1: straight to the VIP Mary J. Blige, Taraji p Henson. 1174 00:53:37,160 --> 00:53:38,240 Speaker 1: I think Alicia Keys. 1175 00:53:38,360 --> 00:53:41,120 Speaker 2: It was literally Keys with the braids, still with the 1176 00:53:41,239 --> 00:53:42,800 Speaker 2: beads and the bards. 1177 00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:47,200 Speaker 1: Was a lesbian. No, it was like the Alicia right 1178 00:53:47,239 --> 00:53:51,200 Speaker 1: after they was like probably stealing Misanda's man, Alicia Keys. 1179 00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:54,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it's probably right between between MIA's man and 1180 00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:55,320 Speaker 2: the braids. 1181 00:53:55,680 --> 00:53:58,200 Speaker 1: Anyway, So I'm in the section. I was like, yo, 1182 00:53:59,080 --> 00:54:01,759 Speaker 1: I can't believe I'm you know, everybody but nobody looked 1183 00:54:01,800 --> 00:54:03,200 Speaker 1: like they were having a good time. They all looked 1184 00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:06,080 Speaker 1: like they were just looking to be there. Yeah. And 1185 00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:09,600 Speaker 1: so I'm there like a walking like I'm married Joe. 1186 00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:10,520 Speaker 2: I was doing the Mary J. 1187 00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:14,320 Speaker 1: Blase Auntie shake and everything like Mary J. It's the 1188 00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:18,440 Speaker 1: four one one like you hit the crouch, the side crouch. Yo. 1189 00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:20,320 Speaker 1: I try to find me some hot boots. So I 1190 00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:24,520 Speaker 1: was like, yo, Mary, yo, When I tell you these 1191 00:54:24,560 --> 00:54:27,120 Speaker 1: women were not having me. They were like, who the 1192 00:54:27,320 --> 00:54:30,600 Speaker 1: fuck is Like I obviously didn't look like a slimmer. 1193 00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:32,920 Speaker 1: It was nothing, but I was like, why would he 1194 00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:35,160 Speaker 1: take me here? I was like, you must see something 1195 00:54:35,200 --> 00:54:35,400 Speaker 1: in me? 1196 00:54:35,719 --> 00:54:37,800 Speaker 2: Great, so or he wanted to see something in you? 1197 00:54:38,080 --> 00:54:49,239 Speaker 1: Eh alexa my applause. So we were in there and 1198 00:54:49,440 --> 00:54:52,719 Speaker 1: everybody's looking at me crazy and they I hear Taraji 1199 00:54:52,880 --> 00:54:55,640 Speaker 1: talk to him and she's like, so, where's your wife, 1200 00:54:56,680 --> 00:55:01,400 Speaker 1: how's the baby? How many months? Is? She like crazy? 1201 00:55:01,480 --> 00:55:03,839 Speaker 1: Like she was saying it real loud so you could hear. Yeah. 1202 00:55:04,280 --> 00:55:06,239 Speaker 1: I was like, well, honestly, I wouldn't know that this. 1203 00:55:06,440 --> 00:55:08,440 Speaker 1: I don't know this guy's deal. He just asked me 1204 00:55:08,520 --> 00:55:10,960 Speaker 1: to come out. Yeah you know. And this I had 1205 00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:12,920 Speaker 1: just started waitress, and I was like, if somebody invites 1206 00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:19,040 Speaker 1: you to Diddy's party, you're going damn cookie cookie lying. Oh. 1207 00:55:19,239 --> 00:55:22,759 Speaker 1: She was not having it. She was the real cookie. Yeah. 1208 00:55:23,760 --> 00:55:26,399 Speaker 1: And so everybody's giving me the eye and I didn't 1209 00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:28,040 Speaker 1: feel comfortable. I was like, yeah, I'm ready to go. 1210 00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:30,440 Speaker 1: Like I thought I was gonna have like Aceus Spade's 1211 00:55:30,560 --> 00:55:34,880 Speaker 1: was coming out. I was like, alla, Bama, man. It 1212 00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:38,560 Speaker 1: was like the limited edition Hennessy was coming out. I 1213 00:55:38,600 --> 00:55:41,520 Speaker 1: don't even drink hennessy, but I was like, age to 1214 00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:44,440 Speaker 1: twelve years, I will drink it if Sean Carter's there 1215 00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:47,719 Speaker 1: or whatever. And he ended up he was like okay, 1216 00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:49,520 Speaker 1: let's go, and so we get in a cab and 1217 00:55:49,560 --> 00:55:51,440 Speaker 1: he's like, so are we going to your place or 1218 00:55:51,960 --> 00:55:52,600 Speaker 1: the hotel? 1219 00:55:54,960 --> 00:55:59,320 Speaker 2: Though you should have been like how many months. 1220 00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:02,440 Speaker 1: Is the baby? What did you do that? I don't know. 1221 00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:05,400 Speaker 1: I was like, well, I'm gonna get out here because 1222 00:56:05,400 --> 00:56:09,000 Speaker 1: I was like, you think you think something happened between 1223 00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:14,120 Speaker 1: you and me? I said, Dodd, I said the dude. 1224 00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:18,120 Speaker 2: I said, sir sir, and or Madden sir. I'm gonna 1225 00:56:18,120 --> 00:56:19,080 Speaker 2: just get out right here. 1226 00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:21,759 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be like Papa Papa, because you look like 1227 00:56:21,800 --> 00:56:24,640 Speaker 1: a papa. That is crazy. I just was like I 1228 00:56:24,680 --> 00:56:27,759 Speaker 1: couldn't believe I was in the VP with everybody that 1229 00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:29,400 Speaker 1: I love and they were all giving. 1230 00:56:29,239 --> 00:56:31,719 Speaker 2: Me the I like, beho you Well, they say never 1231 00:56:31,800 --> 00:56:34,560 Speaker 2: meet your idols, right, That's what they say. Don't never 1232 00:56:34,640 --> 00:56:35,200 Speaker 2: meet your idols. 1233 00:56:36,680 --> 00:56:43,080 Speaker 1: Mary J the sightest I oh, she had the blonde 1234 00:56:43,120 --> 00:56:47,040 Speaker 1: one one with the bob, the bob, the mush one cut, 1235 00:56:47,040 --> 00:56:50,759 Speaker 1: the mushroom cut, the Auntie one the hatertion holeration. Yes, 1236 00:56:51,360 --> 00:56:53,160 Speaker 1: she had that on. She looked so good, and she 1237 00:56:53,320 --> 00:56:56,320 Speaker 1: was with kin Do or whatever, kinba whatever the hell is. 1238 00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:58,160 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that one that she's getting a divorce from him. 1239 00:56:58,440 --> 00:57:00,440 Speaker 1: She's with him, and I was with everybody. 1240 00:57:00,520 --> 00:57:02,919 Speaker 2: I was like, dude, this is like the spot to wait, 1241 00:57:03,000 --> 00:57:04,719 Speaker 2: hold on, hold on. Alicia Keith was giving you the 1242 00:57:04,800 --> 00:57:07,160 Speaker 2: side of her. Her ass was giving you. 1243 00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:09,839 Speaker 1: She wasn't given the side of but because she knew better. 1244 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:13,760 Speaker 1: But all I could feel is Mary's and Taraji's eyes. 1245 00:57:14,000 --> 00:57:15,640 Speaker 1: And you know, their eyes as big. You know black 1246 00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:18,080 Speaker 1: women their eyes are big. I was just like, girl, 1247 00:57:18,160 --> 00:57:20,480 Speaker 1: you up. I was like Taraji, who got that right? Probert, 1248 00:57:21,600 --> 00:57:23,320 Speaker 1: I don't know how big Mary's eyes are. I forget. 1249 00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:26,640 Speaker 1: She was also has on like a frosted pink ray 1250 00:57:26,720 --> 00:57:30,640 Speaker 1: band thing, but you do some big gas as. Yeah, 1251 00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:33,120 Speaker 1: But it was I was. I was really surprised that 1252 00:57:33,280 --> 00:57:35,160 Speaker 1: this guy thought that I was gonna hook up with him, 1253 00:57:35,280 --> 00:57:38,360 Speaker 1: even after the fact that they were saying your wife 1254 00:57:38,480 --> 00:57:40,160 Speaker 1: thought that you didn't hear, or he thought that she 1255 00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:43,080 Speaker 1: didn't care. Maybe, I guess because I'm sure he'd done 1256 00:57:43,120 --> 00:57:45,080 Speaker 1: that before. That's I said, when you are not jay Z. 1257 00:57:45,280 --> 00:57:48,000 Speaker 1: I don't want trickle down dick, trickled. 1258 00:57:47,640 --> 00:57:50,160 Speaker 2: Down, no Reaganomics. Pain. 1259 00:57:50,640 --> 00:57:52,560 Speaker 1: Now, if jay Z had came up to you and said, 1260 00:57:52,800 --> 00:57:54,840 Speaker 1: are we going to your house or the hotel? What 1261 00:57:54,880 --> 00:57:55,520 Speaker 1: would you have said? 1262 00:57:55,640 --> 00:57:58,520 Speaker 2: Absolutely not, absolutely not my house. We definitely go to 1263 00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:02,200 Speaker 2: the hotel. I love First of. 1264 00:58:02,200 --> 00:58:05,240 Speaker 1: All, I'm not I don't find Camel's interesting at all. 1265 00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:07,840 Speaker 1: Not even Joe Cammel, No Joe cool. I don't want 1266 00:58:07,840 --> 00:58:08,880 Speaker 1: to be on no top of humps. 1267 00:58:09,440 --> 00:58:10,040 Speaker 2: I'm all set. 1268 00:58:10,920 --> 00:58:12,880 Speaker 1: That's grass. And the fact that he was with Beyonce 1269 00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:14,320 Speaker 1: at the time, no, why. 1270 00:58:14,480 --> 00:58:16,440 Speaker 2: Really, I feel like women, some women would sleep with 1271 00:58:16,520 --> 00:58:19,000 Speaker 2: DayZ just because they know that he sleeps with Beyonce. No, 1272 00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:21,280 Speaker 2: they'd be like, this is Beyonce's dude. 1273 00:58:21,480 --> 00:58:24,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's not gonna jay Z is not going 1274 00:58:24,160 --> 00:58:25,600 Speaker 1: to insert talent into you. 1275 00:58:25,720 --> 00:58:27,240 Speaker 2: He might give you a little like a turquoise. 1276 00:58:27,320 --> 00:58:30,440 Speaker 1: I know he might give you He's not going to 1277 00:58:30,520 --> 00:58:33,640 Speaker 1: insert No, Sasha fears He'll give you a light a 1278 00:58:33,720 --> 00:58:34,280 Speaker 1: light blue. 1279 00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:37,320 Speaker 2: Ivy so dumb. 1280 00:58:37,800 --> 00:58:39,560 Speaker 1: This was great, Marie. We had such a good time. 1281 00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:41,880 Speaker 1: We learned so much. You know, I feel like you 1282 00:58:41,960 --> 00:58:44,480 Speaker 1: guys want to hear us more at times, So I 1283 00:58:44,520 --> 00:58:45,520 Speaker 1: think we're just going to do this. 1284 00:58:45,840 --> 00:58:47,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't check in with you guys every couple 1285 00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:48,120 Speaker 2: of weeks. 1286 00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:51,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, just let you know that we're out here doing 1287 00:58:51,160 --> 00:58:51,720 Speaker 1: what we can. 1288 00:58:51,760 --> 00:58:54,440 Speaker 2: For the community, for the community. And Sidney's got so 1289 00:58:54,520 --> 00:58:57,520 Speaker 2: many stories and I am here to hear all. 1290 00:58:57,440 --> 00:58:58,880 Speaker 1: Of them and laugh. 1291 00:58:59,560 --> 00:59:02,680 Speaker 2: So, girl, you lived like seven lives, I. 1292 00:59:02,760 --> 00:59:06,200 Speaker 1: Know, and now I'm here on your couch living my 1293 00:59:06,360 --> 00:59:08,440 Speaker 1: best worst life. This is my couch is third life 1294 00:59:08,440 --> 00:59:15,040 Speaker 1: because you know this is a Craigslist couch. You could 1295 00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:18,040 Speaker 1: catch us every second Saturday of the month at Karma 1296 00:59:18,200 --> 00:59:19,760 Speaker 1: Lounge at the warm up. 1297 00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:23,560 Speaker 2: Absolutely, that's that comedy is mom as hell. You can 1298 00:59:23,640 --> 00:59:26,800 Speaker 2: catch us sometimes on my YouTube channel it's called Miss 1299 00:59:26,920 --> 00:59:31,000 Speaker 2: Rez s r e e e z y. Or you 1300 00:59:31,040 --> 00:59:33,840 Speaker 2: can just catch me on Instagram at creezy r e. 1301 00:59:33,960 --> 00:59:38,560 Speaker 1: E z y. Yes, and I'm just said BW on 1302 00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:44,040 Speaker 1: Instagram straight flexing and please follow the Unofficial Expert on 1303 00:59:44,240 --> 00:59:46,920 Speaker 1: Instagram as well. Yeah, don't forget to rate and comment 1304 00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:47,720 Speaker 1: and subscribe. 1305 00:59:47,800 --> 00:59:51,120 Speaker 2: Please grab your friend's phone and subscribe from their phone 1306 00:59:51,120 --> 00:59:52,240 Speaker 2: without telling them, because this. 1307 00:59:52,280 --> 00:59:52,760 Speaker 1: Is what we do. 1308 00:59:53,000 --> 00:59:53,320 Speaker 2: Baby. 1309 00:59:53,560 --> 00:59:56,200 Speaker 1: Yes, we love comments, we respond, we love them, and 1310 00:59:56,320 --> 00:59:58,720 Speaker 1: sometimes when I'm having a bad day. I'll just just 1311 00:59:58,800 --> 01:00:02,600 Speaker 1: review your comedic comment from bbt D two year old 1312 01:00:02,720 --> 01:00:07,600 Speaker 1: seven eight now coming from m Yeah, these hoes are terrible. 1313 01:00:09,480 --> 01:00:10,600 Speaker 1: These hose ain't loyal. 1314 01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:15,240 Speaker 2: All right, Alexa play these hose ain't loyal said, that's 1315 01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:16,080 Speaker 2: not even the name of the song. 1316 01:00:16,160 --> 01:00:16,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's not. 1317 01:00:17,120 --> 01:00:19,040 Speaker 3: Loyal by Darkasin from Spotify. 1318 01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:23,800 Speaker 1: No, Alexa stop, Alexa play Loyal Chris Brown. 1319 01:00:25,280 --> 01:00:30,200 Speaker 3: Loyal East Coast version originally performed terrible karaoke version. 1320 01:00:30,600 --> 01:00:31,680 Speaker 2: Karaoke version. 1321 01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:35,880 Speaker 1: We gotta throw her in the garbage, but this is 1322 01:00:35,960 --> 01:00:41,600 Speaker 1: the music. Carra yoke, Carry carry yoke. 1323 01:00:43,480 --> 01:00:44,800 Speaker 2: These hose ain't loyal. 1324 01:00:48,280 --> 01:00:51,080 Speaker 1: Wrap this podcast up, bye, guys. I just took a bit, 1325 01:00:52,280 --> 01:00:52,880 Speaker 1: just get it it. 1326 01:00:55,480 --> 01:00:56,960 Speaker 2: Hey bye guys. 1327 01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:00,960 Speaker 1: Booz