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Speaker 1: Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm Devoued and we're the Ellis's.

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Speaker 2: You may know us from posting funny videos.

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Speaker 1: With our voice and reading each other publicly as a.

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Speaker 3: Form of therapy.

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Speaker 2: Wait, I make you need therapy most days. Wow.

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Speaker 3: Oh, and one more important thing to mention, we're married.

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Speaker 2: Yes, sir, we are.

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Speaker 4: We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of

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Speaker 4: li's most taboo topics.

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Speaker 3: Things most folks don't want to talk about.

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Speaker 4: Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass

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Speaker 4: is a term that we say every day. So when

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Speaker 4: we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred

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Speaker 4: the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

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Speaker 4: We about to take philosof to our whole new level.

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Speaker 3: Dead ass starts right now.

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Speaker 5: This is the part of the show where we get

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Speaker 5: you guys involved, and we let you ask us whenever

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Speaker 5: you want to ask us.

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Speaker 2: No question is off limits, right, So we.

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Speaker 1: Got we got some time with y'all because we didn't

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Speaker 1: bring y'all all in the snow for no reasons.

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Speaker 3: So we don't get through some questions.

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Speaker 1: So we have Denorra and josh Everyone shout out Joshua

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Speaker 1: and Dwayne Josh.

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Speaker 3: Photos, Videos, podcast everything.

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Speaker 1: Well, first off, shout out to the crew who's helping

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Speaker 1: to run everything here.

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Speaker 3: Everyone has their stations that they're at.

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Speaker 2: Josh, Mattello, Dave, Who am I missing?

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Speaker 1: Tasha Ben Ben? We love all y'all all over, he said.

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Speaker 2: Said Dave twice. Yes you did.

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Speaker 5: I don't get nervous now, Josh, because you're pointing stuff

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Speaker 5: out yelling. Let me tell y'all something about Josh.

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Speaker 1: All right, So they have microphones on either side here,

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Speaker 1: and we'd love for y'all to come to the mic

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Speaker 1: if you have a question, don't be shy, and we'll

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Speaker 1: have a little chit chat.

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Speaker 3: This is the best part podcast, all right. That's when

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Speaker 3: you get to.

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Speaker 1: Talk directly to us. So, who's got a question? You

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Speaker 1: can make your way up towards the microphone.

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Speaker 2: I see one going to Josh. Oh, now you're going

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Speaker 2: to your bathroom?

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Speaker 3: Are you a drink?

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Speaker 6: Oh?

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Speaker 2: You want to hear a drink?

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Speaker 3: I was like, that's the first time we had a

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Speaker 3: brother come up first.

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Speaker 1: All right, Donor's got one. Hi there, Hi, what's up girl?

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Speaker 3: What's your name? Where are you from?

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Speaker 7: I'm from Detroit?

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Speaker 3: All right? Now a native of a native I love that.

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Speaker 3: And my birthday was last week.

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Speaker 5: Happylated birthday started her birthday, see what you started?

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Speaker 7: Huh So happy birthday to my best friend.

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Speaker 5: She brought me here birthday to Yes, happy birthday best

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Speaker 5: friend too.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Favelocity a man.

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Speaker 7: So I'm kind of a deep person and I saw

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Speaker 7: a lot of couples in here and looking at your

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Speaker 7: journey all the way back from Black Love TV show,

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Speaker 7: shout out to that.

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Speaker 3: What is y'all advice for couples overcoming trauma.

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Speaker 7: Struggles and how do you create that healthy balance for relationships?

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Speaker 2: Wow? You really thought about that question?

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Speaker 3: Oh sir, she got nervous.

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Speaker 5: So now that I got the mic, how do you

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Speaker 5: balance trauma from the situational.

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Speaker 2: Activities from my past? You see my fault?

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Speaker 3: No, No, that's a great question.

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Speaker 2: It's a great question.

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Speaker 1: Well for us, there was a lot of unpacking that

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Speaker 1: had to happen over the years. Right, So this is,

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Speaker 1: like we said, twenty years in the making. And I

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Speaker 1: think for Deval and I, we met really young. We

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Speaker 1: were eighteen nineteen. I mean knew each other since elementary school,

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Speaker 1: but I mean really started dating and.

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Speaker 3: Having a relationship in college.

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Speaker 1: So we were struggling a bit because we were individuals,

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Speaker 1: of course eighteen and nineteen years old, who were still

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Speaker 1: trying to find out who we are as people and

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Speaker 1: grow right in that. But then also at the same time,

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Speaker 1: so to consider the other person's feelings, have to kind

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Speaker 1: of make a decision with someone else in mind. So

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Speaker 1: early on in our relationship we struggled with a lot

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Speaker 1: of that because we felt like we weren't communicating effectively.

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Speaker 1: And a lot of it too had to deal with

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Speaker 1: our past, and it had to do with the way

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Speaker 1: we were raised. I was raised in your traditional West

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Speaker 1: Ending household, where we don't really have conversation like that.

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Speaker 1: It's kind of like things may go wrong, you might

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Speaker 1: feel away about something, but you kind of just hope

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Speaker 1: and expect that it'll blow over.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 1: You're not gonna give details about it. You're not gonna

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Speaker 1: tackle the problem. You sweep it under the rug and

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Speaker 1: hopefully it goes away. Devout grew up the complete opposite,

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Speaker 1: you know. He used to have family debates and family

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Speaker 1: they talked about everything and how everyone felt and tried

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Speaker 1: to come to a resolution. So when we started dating

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Speaker 1: and as our relationship progressed, that was a challenge for us.

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Speaker 3: So even in our book and in.

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Speaker 1: Writing the book We Over Me, we talk a lot

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Speaker 1: about how our childhoods affected us and brought us to

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Speaker 1: be the individuals that we are today. And it was

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Speaker 1: acknowledging those things and how it manifested itself in the

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Speaker 1: way that we communicated, in the way that we showed

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Speaker 1: up for each other in our relationship.

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Speaker 3: So even taking it a step further.

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Speaker 1: Deval, being Husband of the Year, moves my parents in

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Speaker 1: to live with us to help us with the boys.

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Speaker 1: So in him bringing my parents into live with us,

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Speaker 1: now he's literally getting a bird's eye view into how

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Speaker 1: even my parents coexist, and he's like, wow, Kadein, I

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Speaker 1: have such a greater understanding for you and why you

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Speaker 1: are the way you are and why you respond the

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Speaker 1: way you sponded to certain things because I can see

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Speaker 1: how your parents raised you and what your family dynamic

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Speaker 1: was like. So it required a lot of conversation between

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Speaker 1: Deval and I, and we never really knew how to

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Speaker 1: communicate effectively.

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Speaker 3: I felt like we had a lot of roadblocks over

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Speaker 3: the year.

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Speaker 1: Is because I took devous transparency in his honesty as

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Speaker 1: him as him kind of badgering me as him pointing

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Speaker 1: out my flaws. I felt very inadequate at times because

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Speaker 1: I felt like, man, I'm not living up to the

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Speaker 1: standard of what he's looking for in a partner. So

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Speaker 1: I used to kind of self loathe and didn't realize

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Speaker 1: why I had such a hard time just being able

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Speaker 1: to express myself. But we were invested in each other,

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Speaker 1: and it required a lot of conversations, a lot of

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Speaker 1: deep questions that really caused me to really search deep

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Speaker 1: and say, you know what, this is not necessarily in attack.

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Speaker 1: It's my husband being invested in wanting to know deep

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Speaker 1: down how I feel about whatever the scenario is.

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Speaker 3: And just that interest that he.

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Speaker 1: Took in me alone made me feel like, man, at

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Speaker 1: least somebody really wants to hear me out. He wants

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Speaker 1: to understand where I'm coming from. He may not always agree,

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Speaker 1: but at least he understands what makes me tick. He

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Speaker 1: understands why I made the decision that I made. And

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Speaker 1: I can't express to y'all how much that patience and

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Speaker 1: that navigating how we communicated helped us get past whatever

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Speaker 1: family traumas, whatever generational curses like.

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Speaker 3: We like to say, had impacted us. As children now adults.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, for me, it was just trying to understand who

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Speaker 5: her parents were so that I could then understand who

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Speaker 5: she is. And then when she says stuff, I had

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Speaker 5: to learn how not to judge her for how she feels. Right, So,

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Speaker 5: for example, if she's upset about something in the past,

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Speaker 5: and she would tell me, you know, when you said this,

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Speaker 5: it hurt my feelings instantly, my thought process is, let

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Speaker 5: me explain to you why what I said shouldn't hurt

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Speaker 5: your feelings. And I was trying to constantly explain what

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Speaker 5: my intention was and pretty much try to invalidate her feelings.

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Speaker 5: Now what I do is is, Okay, I said something

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Speaker 5: that made you feel away. I'm going to acknowledge that

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Speaker 5: you feel a way and apologize that you feel a way.

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Speaker 5: I'm still going to explain to you why I did

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Speaker 5: what I did, and then it's on you to decide

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Speaker 5: if you want to accept my apology and we move forward.

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Speaker 5: I'm not going to just sit here and badge her

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Speaker 5: to make her change your mind. I'm going to listen

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Speaker 5: to her. I understand how you feel, this is how

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Speaker 5: I meant it. Can we move on, and we do

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Speaker 5: that in real time. We don't just wake up, be

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Speaker 5: mad at each other, go throughout the whole day and

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Speaker 5: go to sleep. If I have a problem with this

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Speaker 5: woman right here, I don't I tell you like this.

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Speaker 5: We was about to argue on the way we was

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Speaker 5: at what d Fox DC this morning?

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Speaker 2: No, Fox Fox Detroit this morning.

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Speaker 1: I argue a couple of times this week, so I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to figure out which one it was.

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Speaker 3: It was La Show, it wasn't.

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Speaker 2: No, yeah, yeah, but that's not the story.

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Speaker 3: Okay, that's not the story.

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Speaker 2: It was Fox this Morning.

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Speaker 5: We was getting ready to get on the station rightly,

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Speaker 5: and we arguing back and forth, and then we argue no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 5: because we're going in three two one bout we Yes,

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Speaker 5: we over me black love, Yes, communication, yeah, psych we communicate,

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Speaker 5: well yes, as soon as I cut yo, let me

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Speaker 5: talk to you real quick.

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Speaker 2: That's exactly how it works in Oh.

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Speaker 3: Let me tell y'all. Our glad team, our crew, they're

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Speaker 3: probably half.

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Speaker 1: The time like, let's tiptoe out of here because these

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Speaker 1: two what we're gonna do is deal with it right

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Speaker 1: in that moment, because what we don't want to do

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Speaker 1: is for ship to fester and to linger and life

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Speaker 1: is too short, y'all tackle it.

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Speaker 2: Head on it is. Thank you so much for your questions,

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Speaker 2: your question.

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Speaker 5: Go ahead, Josh got turned the mic on, Josh, Josh

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Speaker 5: broke it. Hey charge him, do not charge me for

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Speaker 5: that mic.

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Speaker 2: So there we go.

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Speaker 8: Hello, my nay Tequia and I'm from Detroit.

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Speaker 2: Shout out Detroit, shout out tro Yes.

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Speaker 3: Okay. First of all, my daughter's name is Brooklyn. You

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Speaker 3: love that. You gotta get taste the name.

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Speaker 6: I know.

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Speaker 8: So I've been watching you, sister, first episode. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 8: So backstory, okay, So.

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Speaker 2: My birthday fabulous? Is that you? Is that you fabulous?

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Speaker 3: My birthday is March eighth? I know? So you have

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Speaker 3: to sign I ain't know. Shout out my chape. You

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Speaker 3: have to sign my hoodie please, I've watched you.

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Speaker 2: Anybody who buy hood I'm.

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Speaker 3: Sign body birthday today, Body, I got you. Thank you, Okay,

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Speaker 3: thank you. I've been married for thirteen years. My hubsband,

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Speaker 3: thank you, thank you.

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Speaker 2: What's up? Husband?

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Speaker 5: I see you thirteen thirteen year bit did brother and.

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Speaker 3: We were sweets just like you are.

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Speaker 8: Yes, okay, so here's my question. I have a session

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Speaker 8: called marriage Matters Monday. And my question is I want

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Speaker 8: to start a podcast and I want to know how

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Speaker 8: it's your beginning, and can you give me.

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Speaker 2: Some Here's the pointers. Here's the pointers, real talk.

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Speaker 5: You have to start, start, and be prepared to do

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Speaker 5: podcasts when nobody is listening. Most people quit before the

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Speaker 5: audience gets there because they don't believe in themselves enough

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Speaker 5: to keep going.

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Speaker 2: I was making videos with.

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Speaker 5: My wife and my kids for two years before anyone

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Speaker 5: of y'all saw that video with freaking Cairo.

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Speaker 2: Two years.

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Speaker 5: Every single day I did two pictures and a video

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Speaker 5: every single day for two years. And I told Matt

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Speaker 5: and I told Josh, I was gonna do this every

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Speaker 5: day until people started paying attention and now looks and

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Speaker 5: to be honest, that's the only advice I can give you.

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Speaker 2: You gotta do the work.

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Speaker 5: You gotta be consistent, you gotta start, and don't quit

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Speaker 5: on yourself.

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Speaker 2: You do that. There you go, you'll be successful.

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Speaker 3: Good?

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Speaker 9: All right?

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Speaker 3: Down by donor?

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Speaker 2: All right?

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Speaker 3: Hello?

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Speaker 2: What's up?

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Speaker 3: My name is Sierrah.

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Speaker 10: He's here, So I'm an aries shout out to the

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Speaker 10: bail fellow aries.

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Speaker 5: Uh, what's soesbril?

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Speaker 2: Second? Happy brother to myself?

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Speaker 10: Right, right right, So, and I'm married actually to a Leo,

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Speaker 10: So I understand, y'all. Okay on the fireside marriage okay,

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Speaker 10: fire sign that is, I understand it. So my question

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Speaker 10: is more so for could them you know the veiled

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Speaker 10: team aries.

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Speaker 3: You can sprinkle al one if you want to.

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Speaker 2: But let's the question a question.

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Speaker 3: So I just had a baby girl in March.

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Speaker 2: Congratulations in November.

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Speaker 3: I'm sorry, right before thanksgivings?

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Speaker 10: Okay to be or Cadie, I didn't even love It's

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Speaker 10: all right, go ahead.

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Speaker 3: You're looking snatched tonight, honey, Okay, thank you, baby Chell.

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Speaker 10: I could barely breathe, but give us the worst overroatine

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Speaker 10: give us. I know one of your last podcasts you

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Speaker 10: talked about you finally getting into the gym and you

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Speaker 10: being consistent this time. Talk about what was different for

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Speaker 10: you this time? You know what about it? How you

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Speaker 10: getting back snatched after having baby?

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Speaker 3: Coda? King, I appreciate the King making right, Thank you,

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Speaker 3: thank you.

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Speaker 1: So I have a very love hate relationship with the gym,

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Speaker 1: with working out, but I'm married to a former athlete,

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Speaker 1: so it really just required why are you drinking my

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Speaker 1: drink now?

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Speaker 5: To tell you answer your question, why are you focusing

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Speaker 5: on me anyway?

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Speaker 1: Because I'm trying to be intact for y'all. So the

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Speaker 1: biggest thing for me was consistency. That was an issue, right,

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Speaker 1: And I believe the culture around women having to snap back,

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Speaker 1: of course with social media and celebrity culture is a stressor, right.

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Speaker 3: The biggest thing that I.

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Speaker 1: Learned after each child, well, I learned this information which

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Speaker 1: is completely just scientific. My obgyn told me after Jackson,

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Speaker 1: go easy on yourself because after having a baby, first

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Speaker 1: of all, it took ten months to get to that

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Speaker 1: point for you to grow an entire human. What makes

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Speaker 1: you think that you're gonna snap back in six weeks.

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Speaker 1: The body hormonally after a baby doesn't even regulate to

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Speaker 1: baseline for most women until nine to twelve months after birth.

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Speaker 3: So think about that.

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Speaker 1: You have all these hormonal imbalances going on, you're tied,

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Speaker 1: you're maybe breastfeeding, bottle feeding, whatever it is, you're breastfeeding exactly,

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Speaker 1: so you're up with a baby every two hours, feeding

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Speaker 1: on demand. Then, not to mention too, you're gonna eat

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Speaker 1: what you want to eat because you just feel comfortable

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Speaker 1: in that space. The biggest thing is giving yourself grace.

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Speaker 1: You have to. You have to for your own mental

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Speaker 1: health and your own sanity. For me, it was important

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Speaker 1: for me to just get back moving again. I feel

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Speaker 1: my best self when i'm moving, when i'm active, when

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Speaker 1: I'm able to bounce around. Thankfully, having devoured by my side,

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Speaker 1: he's able to encourage me. The days that I don't

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Speaker 1: feel like going to the gym.

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Speaker 3: He's there.

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Speaker 2: She cusses me out.

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Speaker 1: I do. I have almost where I don't want to go,

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Speaker 1: and he hears it too. But also have an accountability partner.

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Speaker 1: So I think you had posted something recently about me

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Speaker 1: being in shape or something, and some of the backlass

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Speaker 1: you got was that you're so overly concerned with my

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Speaker 1: body getting back and something like that.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, a couple of people, because I always post Kadeen

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Speaker 5: in a way to just empower her make her feel

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Speaker 5: comfortable about yo, I'm on this journey with you, and

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Speaker 5: I guess a couple of ladies felt like I was

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Speaker 5: always pushing her to work out right, and reality, I've

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Speaker 5: never pushed Kadeen to work out ever. I've always only

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Speaker 5: asked her when she's ready, let me know and I

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Speaker 5: can help you. But the biggest thing for me, and

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Speaker 5: I'm gonna speak to the gentleman here is we like

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Speaker 5: to have. We like when our women look a certain way.

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Speaker 5: We also have to be involved in their maternal health

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Speaker 5: and their health in general so that we can facilitate

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Speaker 5: that look, which means I go to the gym her

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Speaker 5: with her. I know all of her I know everything

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Speaker 5: she's supposed to eat, not supposed to eat, her sleeping pattern.

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Speaker 5: I pay attention to all of these details so that

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Speaker 5: I can be of assistance to her going through this journey.

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Speaker 5: And when she doesn't want to do it, I've learned

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Speaker 5: to be like, cool, you have your own process, but

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Speaker 5: when you do, we gonna go together.

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Speaker 2: Because the more we go together, the more I've noticed.

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Speaker 5: Like it's gonna sound crazy, but it's almost like her

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Speaker 5: pheromones and my hormones match met Schuell. And when we

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Speaker 5: go to the gym together, it's an enjoyable process, but

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Speaker 5: not the process of be telling her what to do.

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Speaker 5: She has her workout, we go together, I do my workout.

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Speaker 5: She'd be watching me from afar. I walk by, tap

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Speaker 5: on the booty, give us some encouragement, keep going. But

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Speaker 5: I've noticed with that type of encouragement she's just been

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Speaker 5: more into going to the gym. But it all started

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Speaker 5: with me understanding certain things about like the women's women's body.

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Speaker 5: For example, you said you had a baby win November, right,

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Speaker 5: and your breastfeeding. I want you guys to think about this, right,

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Speaker 5: I want you guys think about this. The most disciplined

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Speaker 5: people in the world, right, Navy seals, Army rangers.

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Speaker 2: Right.

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Speaker 5: These people train for months to learn how to deal

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Speaker 5: with sleep deprivation, and they are the most disciplined people

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Speaker 5: on the planet. But they even have to train for

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Speaker 5: sleep deprivation. But in society, we expect a mom to

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Speaker 5: deal with sleep deprivation.

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Speaker 2: Be a wife, be a mom, go to work. It's

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Speaker 2: a lot. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 5: And I'm not saying this now as the like I know,

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Speaker 5: like I'm so wise.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm saying this because it's my four fucking kids.

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Speaker 2: And when it was my first kid. When it was

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Speaker 2: my first kid, it.

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Speaker 3: Was disrespectful, y'all. He was disrespectful.

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Speaker 2: I was not disrespectful him.

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Speaker 3: What you told me?

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Speaker 2: So damn you're gonna put me out there these people

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Speaker 2: like me, why would you do that?

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Speaker 3: Telling the truth? Are transparent?

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Speaker 6: Right?

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Speaker 3: We keep it real, right, Hey, I love you, you

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Speaker 3: know that. Don't even go there.

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Speaker 5: So this is after our first baby. My mom had

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Speaker 5: three natural births. So at six weeks I was like,

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Speaker 5: what's up. She was just like, I know, babey, no baby.

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Speaker 5: We were having an argument. I was like, yo, you

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Speaker 5: act like you the first woman to ever have a baby.

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Speaker 5: I said that, Yeah, I said it, said it, But

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Speaker 5: I was twenty seven. I had no clue what a

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Speaker 5: woman's body goes through, and I felt like I was

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Speaker 5: doing everything in my power as a husband at that

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Speaker 5: time to make sure that her life was good. I

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Speaker 5: moved to grandmother in with us. Her mom used to

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Speaker 5: come over every day. I made sure that everything around

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Speaker 5: her was easy, so I thought that that would help

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Speaker 5: her get back. I didn't understand the psychological and physiological

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Speaker 5: effects that having a baby was gonna have on her body.

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Speaker 5: And the reason why I don't mind telling that story

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Speaker 5: is because there's some young couple in here who's probably

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Speaker 5: going through the same thing. Who she's looking at her

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Speaker 5: baby's father or husband like, YO, like, what's your problem?

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Speaker 5: Why aren't you like deval If I only talk about

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Speaker 5: how much I know now, rather than saying, oh, you,

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Speaker 5: just like Deva.

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Speaker 2: Was when he was twenty seven. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 5: We have to learn as people to give each other grace,

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Speaker 5: the same way I gave Kadeen grace as I learned

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Speaker 5: about her body. She gave me grace because if you

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Speaker 5: didn't give me grace, we would be divorced and she'd

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Speaker 5: be cussing.

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Speaker 2: Me out like everybody else.

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Speaker 5: And I think it's important to tell that part of

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Speaker 5: the story too, because I know this is your first child.

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Speaker 5: Second okay, so you know a lot of the stuff

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Speaker 5: that I've y'all gone through that and now it's the

404
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Speaker 5: second time around and.

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Speaker 2: You feel a lot more prepared.

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Speaker 5: We're hoping that somebody hears this and says, you know what, babe,

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Speaker 5: now that I understand what sleep deprivation is, I'll be

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Speaker 5: more inclined to give you some grace. I want you

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Speaker 5: all to know, ladies too. You know who else deals

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Speaker 5: with sleep deprivation. Your child's father. And this is the truth. Somebody, Look,

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Speaker 5: somebody sucked their tea.

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Speaker 2: Looks, why are you gonna suck your tee? Why are

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Speaker 2: you gonna suck your teeth? Huh huh.

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Speaker 5: You don't think I was up you crazy. Let me

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Speaker 5: tell Let me tell you. Let me tell you what

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Speaker 5: my schedule talking about. Let me tell you what my

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Speaker 5: schedule was like with Cairo. Right, Cairo Kadeen wasn't working.

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Speaker 5: Stop me when I'm lying. Was I not putting fourteen

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Speaker 5: hours in the gym, fourteen hours at the gym working

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Speaker 5: I owned the gym. I had to be there to

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Speaker 5: make sure that I could supplement whatever she wasn't bringing

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Speaker 5: in at the time, because I wanted to make sure

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Speaker 5: that my wife didn't have to go back to work.

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Speaker 5: Was I not working seven days a week, I had

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Speaker 5: no days off. I was working fourteen hours a day.

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Speaker 5: When I came home from them, the first thing kay

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Speaker 5: did was give me Cairo in my line yep. So

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Speaker 5: when was my time as a dad to be off?

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Speaker 5: I worked fourteen hours. Soon as I came in, she

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Speaker 5: gave me the baby. So now when she goes to

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Speaker 5: take the rest, I'm trying to make sure that she

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Speaker 5: has some time to herself. It's three or four hours

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Speaker 5: that I'm with Cairo. That's eighteen hours already. D Val

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Speaker 5: still got to eat and sleep. Every time Kadean got

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Speaker 5: up with Kyro to breastfeed. Did I get up.

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Speaker 3: Yeah I did.

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Speaker 5: I got up and this like this, you good, okay,

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Speaker 5: but it's still broken sleep. And after months you don't

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Speaker 5: realize how your husband or your child's father is going

440
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:45,200
Speaker 5: through the same thing. You're going through the same way.

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Speaker 5: You got to learn how to deal with sleep deprivation,

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Speaker 5: so does he. Because I was a grumpy motherfucker was

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Speaker 5: I not? Were so on top of sleep deprivation. I

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00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:54,640
Speaker 5: wasn't even getting no.

445
00:21:54,640 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 2: Booty, no. So we was at each other that he

446
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,120
Speaker 2: was at each other. But here's the biggest thing.

447
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:05,960
Speaker 5: By Cairo, she and I were a little bit more aware,

448
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:10,160
Speaker 5: so there wasn't the same type of vitriol towards each

449
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:12,640
Speaker 5: other as it was for Jackson. But I always want

450
00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 5: to point that out too, because I feel like dads

451
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 5: who are real involved in their children's lives don't get

452
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:22,159
Speaker 5: enough credit. And when we do well, people say things like,

453
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:23,360
Speaker 5: that's what you're supposed to do.

454
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:24,720
Speaker 2: But if you ever.

455
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:26,520
Speaker 5: Say to a woman that's what you're supposed to do,

456
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:30,119
Speaker 5: now you're being massagynistic. So I'm always gonna speak for

457
00:22:30,119 --> 00:22:31,240
Speaker 5: the gentleman fellas.

458
00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 8: All right, now that's fuck God.

459
00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,280
Speaker 1: Now they want to talk of I love that and

460
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:43,439
Speaker 1: when it comes to the workouts. Girl, I've noticed recently

461
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:46,359
Speaker 1: that I was, yeah, this is the same person that

462
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,520
Speaker 1: whispered to me. Okay, we got to keep it concise

463
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:51,080
Speaker 1: because it's a lot of people. Meanwhile, about five minutes,

464
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 1: ten minutes later, my bad.

465
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:53,600
Speaker 2: You know, I just got into my story.

466
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 1: It's all good when it comes to workouts. I've noticed

467
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,320
Speaker 1: that it has helped me keep my curves. But slim

468
00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:03,840
Speaker 1: down is higher protein. Trying to eat at least five

469
00:23:03,880 --> 00:23:06,760
Speaker 1: meals a day, and I mean like breakfast, small meals,

470
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:10,440
Speaker 1: small snack, lunch, small snack, dinner, sometimes a protein shake,

471
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:12,160
Speaker 1: something that's easy. Like now that I'm on the road,

472
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 1: I have my greens with me, vitamins with me, protein

473
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:18,800
Speaker 1: bars like whatever I can just eat so my body

474
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:22,639
Speaker 1: doesn't go into starvation mode. Also, ladies, quiet as it's kept.

475
00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:23,840
Speaker 1: I know you don't want to be bulky.

476
00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:28,639
Speaker 3: Sometimes. Look, weren't lift weights I lift?

477
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,680
Speaker 2: She didn't want to do it either. I ain't a

478
00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 2: football player. Why I got a hand clean?

479
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:36,760
Speaker 5: Now her ass on her lower back, and she's like,

480
00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:38,639
Speaker 5: if I look at my ass, I'm like, I know,

481
00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:43,120
Speaker 5: hand clean deadlifts, front squats, back squats.

482
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:45,880
Speaker 2: Lunges, sprints. Don't get on that trup mill.

483
00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 5: In forty five minutes on the treadmill, you're gonna be skinny.

484
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:51,440
Speaker 5: You're gonna be skinny like them women that be running

485
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:54,080
Speaker 5: the marathons. They be skinny fat because they'd be skinny,

486
00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:55,400
Speaker 5: but they still got fat pockets.

487
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:58,040
Speaker 3: Skinny fat. I've never seen that, y'all seen skinny fat pever.

488
00:23:58,359 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 2: Yes, it's a thing.

489
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:02,320
Speaker 5: Be because people who run marathons their bodies always in

490
00:24:02,359 --> 00:24:05,640
Speaker 5: starvation mode, so they store fats to pocket and places

491
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:08,359
Speaker 5: and no muscle. So that's why their body looks emaciated

492
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:10,479
Speaker 5: for doing miles forty five minutes on the treadmill.

493
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:11,240
Speaker 2: You don't gotta do that.

494
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 3: Their heart health is probably popping, though it is.

495
00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:15,480
Speaker 5: They have great heart health, great heart health, but poor

496
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 5: muscular structure is bad for your joints. Lift weights, weights,

497
00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 5: lift weights, squats, deadlifts, lunges.

498
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:26,480
Speaker 1: And sleep if you can. Know that's hard, but getting

499
00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:29,639
Speaker 1: some decent sleep, Drinking your water literally the basics that

500
00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:31,880
Speaker 1: people tell you it actually works, So take it back

501
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:35,720
Speaker 1: to the basics, get your rest. Congratulations on baby girl, Yes,

502
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: thank you so much.

503
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 2: Baby. Running out of a drink you might want to Yeah, whatever.

504
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,719
Speaker 5: People get jewels in their sideburns, and now they want

505
00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:50,679
Speaker 5: it's all crazy, you know, go ahead, you know triple

506
00:24:51,240 --> 00:25:07,800
Speaker 5: for meday? No no, oh no, no, no, HeiG you

507
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:08,560
Speaker 5: which she?

508
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,399
Speaker 2: I ain't know? I could say, did you? I can't.

509
00:25:12,560 --> 00:25:17,080
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, I love Detroit. I love what you're doing.

510
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:21,320
Speaker 3: We can't gusky song, nothing.

511
00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:29,840
Speaker 11: Worried nor too.

512
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,359
Speaker 2: All right, we gotta get back to the questions we got.

513
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:38,400
Speaker 2: They about to do a whole medley. It's this group

514
00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:41,239
Speaker 2: right here. It's this group right here.

515
00:25:42,400 --> 00:26:03,000
Speaker 12: Go ahead, literally you talk answer, Oh, give got something

516
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:03,320
Speaker 12: for round?

517
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 2: Applause. I was actually great. I was great. I was great.

518
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:08,359
Speaker 3: Kaoke in the middle, list of letters.

519
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,439
Speaker 2: All right, my bad, Josh, my bad. Broke ahead?

520
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:12,480
Speaker 3: What's that? Brother?

521
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:14,879
Speaker 6: Hello Detroit?

522
00:26:15,119 --> 00:26:16,560
Speaker 3: All right, now, what's up?

523
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:19,040
Speaker 2: What's up?

524
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,280
Speaker 3: Did you trick your wife into the fourth son?

525
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,240
Speaker 6: Or did you have a conversation with her.

526
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:30,560
Speaker 2: With the hard questions? It was all nice? Set them down.

527
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:31,960
Speaker 3: I drink for that one.

528
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:39,399
Speaker 5: Did you trick Kadeen? So I'm gonna be honest, I

529
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:42,480
Speaker 5: tricked it. No, The question was did I tricked Kadeen?

530
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,159
Speaker 5: Did I trick Kadeen? Or did we agree to have

531
00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,720
Speaker 5: a fourth child, because I know everybody knew after the

532
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 5: three whole boys, she was like, she done, she done,

533
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:53,120
Speaker 5: she done.

534
00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 2: Here's the truth.

535
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:58,200
Speaker 5: Kadeen came to me one day and said, I don't

536
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,800
Speaker 5: feel like I'm done having kids. She said she didn't

537
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:04,119
Speaker 5: feel like she was done having kids. I said to her,

538
00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:08,359
Speaker 5: I said, hey, now, hey, now, I can't guarantee you

539
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:09,680
Speaker 5: that this is gonna be a girl.

540
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:14,800
Speaker 2: I can't, I can't, but I can guarantee you that.

541
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,280
Speaker 5: If we have another child, we will be able to

542
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:20,040
Speaker 5: expand our family and do it in a healthy, positive way,

543
00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:20,760
Speaker 5: and we gonna.

544
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:21,359
Speaker 2: Love whatever it is.

545
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:23,480
Speaker 5: That was my way of making sure that if it

546
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:28,840
Speaker 5: was another boy, it wasn't just my fault. And she

547
00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 5: was just like, I don't care if it's a boy

548
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 5: or a girl. She just wanted to have another child.

549
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:37,320
Speaker 5: And once she says she was ready to be a

550
00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:40,159
Speaker 5: mom again, I was like, let's do it.

551
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:42,119
Speaker 2: Let's let's get it done. So the answer is no,

552
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:42,919
Speaker 2: I didn't trick her.

553
00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:46,479
Speaker 5: If you read the book, you find out that Kadeen

554
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:50,520
Speaker 5: and I had an unexpected pregnancy in college. So part

555
00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:53,680
Speaker 5: of the reason why Kadeen and I take childbirth child,

556
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:58,359
Speaker 5: labor child rearing so like serious is because since we

557
00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 5: were nineteen years old, this has always been part of

558
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:03,040
Speaker 5: our mindset how we were going to raise our families

559
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:04,440
Speaker 5: and making sure we do it the right way.

560
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:07,080
Speaker 6: So when it came to.

561
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:10,400
Speaker 5: Having children, we joked online about having three hole boys

562
00:28:10,440 --> 00:28:12,760
Speaker 5: and only wanting a daughter. But it didn't matter to

563
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 5: me if I had five, six, seven, eight sons. It

564
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,119
Speaker 5: didn't matter to me if I had eight daughters. Who Now,

565
00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:20,080
Speaker 5: I just well, we can't have no more.

566
00:28:21,400 --> 00:28:28,280
Speaker 2: Cause uh yeah, go ahead, go ahead. I got cut up.

567
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:33,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, I that episode did. I got the snip snippities.

568
00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:35,560
Speaker 5: I went to sleep one night, woke up in the

569
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:37,600
Speaker 5: doctor's office. I said, what the fuck am I doing here?

570
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 5: She was like, nothing, baby, go back to sleep.

571
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 2: I was like, all right, listen.

572
00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:44,200
Speaker 3: And it was the craziest thing.

573
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 1: So imagine this, you know, I schedule, I found the

574
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 1: best roologists I could find out in Atlanta and made

575
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 1: the appointment.

576
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 3: So it took the.

577
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:55,800
Speaker 1: Valin that morning and just imagine driving into this place.

578
00:28:56,800 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 1: There's a parking lot full of cars, and literally every

579
00:29:00,800 --> 00:29:03,200
Speaker 1: car was a man taking.

580
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:09,680
Speaker 3: This really slow, reluctant walk out of the car into

581
00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 3: the office. All of us was like this, and then

582
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,920
Speaker 3: one by one you're seeing the wives.

583
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:18,640
Speaker 1: Go back in and pick their husband up and walking

584
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:21,440
Speaker 1: them slowly back out. It was like dropping your kid

585
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:22,720
Speaker 1: off at daycare and coming back.

586
00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:25,280
Speaker 2: We was looking at each other like.

587
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 3: Everybody know why they're there.

588
00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:38,920
Speaker 2: Come on, but you next, you next, come on, don't

589
00:29:38,920 --> 00:29:41,840
Speaker 2: fall asleep now, it was. It was a sad day.

590
00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:42,520
Speaker 2: It was a sad day.

591
00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 1: It was.

592
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 2: It was a sad day.

593
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:45,360
Speaker 3: I mean, but you know it was time.

594
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: It was.

595
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 7: But now.

596
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:50,480
Speaker 2: Here's here's one thing I will tell you. I didn't

597
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:52,280
Speaker 2: know this women.

598
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:57,040
Speaker 5: The women's libidos are definitely different than men's, but they

599
00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:00,040
Speaker 5: also every time you lay down with a woman, the

600
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 5: thought process is I could get pregnant.

601
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:07,240
Speaker 2: Yes, for men, that's not the thought process. So we'd

602
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:10,720
Speaker 2: be ready to go. And it wasn't until years.

603
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 5: Kadeen was explaining to me, like, yo, we laid down

604
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 5: to have a good time and then we just got

605
00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:18,720
Speaker 5: kash randomly, like that's my biggest fear.

606
00:30:19,040 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 3: Then I got the IUD.

607
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 1: Put in anybody else who've had the IUD supposed to

608
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:25,480
Speaker 1: be non hormonal. So I'm thinking, oh, this is the

609
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 1: perfect way to prevent pregnancy, and I can have a

610
00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 1: good time. But that was causing a whole another set

611
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:31,479
Speaker 1: of issues for me, to the point where I went

612
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: for a physical one day and I was borderline the kneemaic.

613
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 1: Why because every momth I'm losing tons of blood like this,

614
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:37,640
Speaker 1: just like I was TMI.

615
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:39,240
Speaker 3: But ladies, y'all know what I'm talking about.

616
00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:39,640
Speaker 2: Yeah.

617
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 3: So at that point, I said, you know what, I know,

618
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:43,600
Speaker 3: I wasn't done with children.

619
00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:45,440
Speaker 1: I just had that feeling and any woman that I

620
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:47,320
Speaker 1: had spoken to, even women older than me, that said,

621
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:49,960
Speaker 1: you'll know when you're done. It's just like a thing

622
00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:52,200
Speaker 1: that women know when they're done. I just felt like

623
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 1: I wasn't done regardless if we had a.

624
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:54,320
Speaker 3: Girl and boy.

625
00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:56,560
Speaker 1: And I just thought of a funny ass story of

626
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 1: how we found out in the very very early stages

627
00:30:59,240 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 1: that it was a boy.

628
00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:01,200
Speaker 3: Did we ever tell us?

629
00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 1: I don't know.

630
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 3: I don't think we did.

631
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:11,000
Speaker 2: She said, girl tell us, all right, So this real quick,

632
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 2: real quick.

633
00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:14,440
Speaker 3: Sorry I got questions, but this one was a funny.

634
00:31:14,720 --> 00:31:17,720
Speaker 5: Eden was already pregnant, Kadeen was already pregnant. We were

635
00:31:17,720 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 5: trying to find out if it was a boy or

636
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 5: a girl.

637
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:20,040
Speaker 2: They got anybody special.

638
00:31:20,520 --> 00:31:24,120
Speaker 3: The test called sneak peak. I never heard of sneak peak.

639
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 5: So with a sneak peek, you take a blood test,

640
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,080
Speaker 5: you put your finger, you take a blood test, and

641
00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 5: you put it in this thing. You send it into

642
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,320
Speaker 5: a lab and they tell you they send you in

643
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:34,760
Speaker 5: about a week if you have a boy or a girl.

644
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:36,360
Speaker 2: But the thing is, with a sneak.

645
00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:39,760
Speaker 5: Peak, you can't have any other testosterone around. So Kay

646
00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:41,720
Speaker 5: has to take the sneak peak by herself, and I

647
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:45,760
Speaker 5: can't be in a room. Kadeen is a hypochondriac, right,

648
00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 5: so she stabs her finger. Now, before that, Kadeen was

649
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:53,280
Speaker 5: talking nasty, Yo, tonightmen, where you can We're about to

650
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:53,960
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying.

651
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:58,360
Speaker 2: She was like, yo, babe, I'm about to go in

652
00:31:58,400 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 2: the room and change. Go get ready.

653
00:31:59,840 --> 00:32:02,400
Speaker 5: So I'm laying in a bad naked waiting for her

654
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:04,640
Speaker 5: to come out. She like, Babe, I'm gonna do this

655
00:32:04,680 --> 00:32:06,160
Speaker 5: sneak peak real quick, and I'm gonna come back. It's

656
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 5: gonna take five minutes.

657
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 2: So I'm like fine. So I'm sitting there naked and

658
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:13,160
Speaker 2: I hear a whole bunch of fumbling going on. I'm like, man,

659
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:14,400
Speaker 2: what the fuck is going on in there, So I

660
00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 2: go in there.

661
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:17,400
Speaker 5: Kadeen got to turn the kid around her finger, right,

662
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 5: She's sticking her finger in, sticking her finger and wondering

663
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:26,480
Speaker 5: why no blood is coming out. So I go, hey, babe,

664
00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:28,240
Speaker 5: you have to take the rubber band off your finger.

665
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 5: So I take the rubber band off her finger. One

666
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:36,320
Speaker 5: little piece of blood drops out like this, and Kadeen goes, Now,

667
00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:40,720
Speaker 5: I told y'all, I was in my bed naked. So

668
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:44,520
Speaker 5: I'm naked and I catch her right, but she naked,

669
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:48,320
Speaker 5: So now she naked fall into me naked and I'm naked,

670
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:50,040
Speaker 5: So now I'm naked and hard.

671
00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:54,800
Speaker 2: She like, I'm like, could he wake up? Could he

672
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:55,280
Speaker 2: wake up?

673
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:57,280
Speaker 3: She like, I passed out so quick.

674
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 5: So I drag her back to the bed. I'm dragging

675
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:02,160
Speaker 5: her back to the bed, but Dick's still hard.

676
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,800
Speaker 3: And the whole time, I'm holding my finger up.

677
00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 2: In the air like like this.

678
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:09,160
Speaker 3: You can't touch me. Don't touch me, You're gonna contaminate

679
00:33:09,240 --> 00:33:09,800
Speaker 3: the sample.

680
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:12,360
Speaker 5: So I drag her back to the bed, throw in

681
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 5: the bed, I go get the blood. I put it

682
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 5: in there, close everything up, and we send it away.

683
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,320
Speaker 5: I ain't think the shit was gonna work because it's

684
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:22,160
Speaker 5: not supposed to be no testosteroning around.

685
00:33:22,560 --> 00:33:24,440
Speaker 1: And then it's early, it's like eight weeks, so they

686
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:25,880
Speaker 1: say it's like ninety five percent.

687
00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 5: Sure, yeah, but I was behind her getting all the

688
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,080
Speaker 5: blood and stuff with a hard dick, like I'm pretty

689
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:32,360
Speaker 5: sure there's testosterone somewhere.

690
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 2: In the air, and I dragged her in the back,

691
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:37,280
Speaker 2: put everything up, going there.

692
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 5: We get it back in the week. It says you

693
00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:42,080
Speaker 5: having another boy. First person she blame is who.

694
00:33:43,640 --> 00:33:45,400
Speaker 3: I was like, you contaminated the sample.

695
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 2: She was so mad.

696
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:51,080
Speaker 1: But then we got from the doctor. Yes, and it's

697
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:54,000
Speaker 1: the Dakota Marley Ellis is here. Y'all happy and healthy,

698
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:56,240
Speaker 1: and he's the little soul who's supposed to be here.

699
00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:58,400
Speaker 1: And I couldn't be more thrilled. See he looks just

700
00:33:58,480 --> 00:33:59,600
Speaker 1: like I don't know if y'all seen him, have you

701
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 1: seen the That is my twin. And I said, Lord,

702
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:04,720
Speaker 1: I guess I should have been more specific.

703
00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:06,560
Speaker 3: I asked for a mini me. I should have asked

704
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 3: for one with a vagina. He gave me one with

705
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:09,719
Speaker 3: a penis. But it's all good.

706
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:11,680
Speaker 1: We love him just the same, and he's the perfect

707
00:34:12,120 --> 00:34:13,280
Speaker 1: completion to our family.

708
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:17,680
Speaker 3: Yes, who's next.

709
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:20,279
Speaker 9: Okay, I'm gonna make this quick, but it is a

710
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:24,960
Speaker 9: little layered. Okay, So first I want to acknowledge my

711
00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:27,719
Speaker 9: sister that was over here, who said her birthday was

712
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:33,920
Speaker 9: March eighth, and she has a daughter named Brooklyn. This year, yes, no,

713
00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:38,360
Speaker 9: it's not my birthday. This year on March eighth, my

714
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 9: son and I it'll be our daughter's fifth birthday.

715
00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:42,640
Speaker 3: And she actually was still.

716
00:34:42,440 --> 00:34:46,560
Speaker 9: Born and her name is Brooke, and lately everywhere we

717
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:49,920
Speaker 9: go we've been seeing signs of her. So I just

718
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:50,920
Speaker 9: want to acknowledge her.

719
00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 2: And that was I could have shout out to you.

720
00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:57,440
Speaker 12: Yes.

721
00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,560
Speaker 9: So the first part of my question is can I

722
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:04,799
Speaker 9: give you all a copy of my book? Definitely got

723
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 9: me a word with B on everything.

724
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:09,919
Speaker 3: A word would be book right here, Thank you doing.

725
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:13,200
Speaker 9: Then my question is my husband to know right here,

726
00:35:13,239 --> 00:35:16,560
Speaker 9: being a photographer, we have been married.

727
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:18,760
Speaker 3: It'll be four years in August.

728
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,040
Speaker 9: We met at work. He was a police officer. I

729
00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:25,320
Speaker 9: was police dispatch. Shout out to Detroit police. We also

730
00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:29,640
Speaker 9: passed three boys. Like I said, our girl was stillborn.

731
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:31,800
Speaker 9: But my question is how do you keep the balance

732
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:37,279
Speaker 9: of keeping each other first while being a mother being

733
00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 9: a father, Because I'm I'm family fairy oriented and I

734
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:44,240
Speaker 9: often put our kids into everything, and he's like, babe,

735
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:46,360
Speaker 9: what about me? Like, we don't always have to include

736
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:48,800
Speaker 9: the kids, So how do you keep the balance of

737
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:49,960
Speaker 9: not including a kid?

738
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 3: If you cracked open the book? Who knows what the

739
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:58,600
Speaker 3: chapter is called? The kids ain't first facts?

740
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:02,480
Speaker 1: And that's a fact Daval and I learned after just

741
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:06,399
Speaker 1: years of being parents, being spouses and then also having

742
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:12,080
Speaker 1: businesses together, podcasts, careers, everything that we don't work well

743
00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:15,239
Speaker 1: and nothing around us stays afloat if he and I

744
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,480
Speaker 1: are disconnected. So that's the first thing, because it all

745
00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:23,200
Speaker 1: started here with us. We are very deliberate about setting

746
00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:26,200
Speaker 1: out time now for each other, setting out time for

747
00:36:26,280 --> 00:36:28,239
Speaker 1: the children, Like I mean, shit, we stopped the whole

748
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:30,440
Speaker 1: show to call Jackson on FaceTime just to make sure

749
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:32,920
Speaker 1: that the moments that we're not therefore were still present

750
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: for right. So that's the utmost important to us, because

751
00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 1: we too are very family orients, feed byel like we

752
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 1: grew up in households that were also very family oriented

753
00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:42,839
Speaker 1: as well.

754
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 5: Absolutely, I'm gonna give you an l cheek code right here.

755
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:51,880
Speaker 5: Ask your husband what he wants and when he tells you,

756
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 5: don't you judge him?

757
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:54,600
Speaker 12: Do it?

758
00:36:55,960 --> 00:37:01,120
Speaker 2: Then tell him what you want and say I need

759
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:04,440
Speaker 2: you to do this. This is what we do. I

760
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:05,040
Speaker 2: kid you not.

761
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:09,040
Speaker 5: And when you say that on social media or you

762
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:10,640
Speaker 5: say that to a bunch of people who are not

763
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:13,080
Speaker 5: trying to be of service to their partner, all your

764
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 5: heir is, oh my god, she's too submissive. On my god,

765
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 5: he's a simp. Your goal in a marriage is to

766
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:20,200
Speaker 5: be of service to your spouse.

767
00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:22,280
Speaker 2: That's your goal, period.

768
00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:25,400
Speaker 5: The only reason you get married is because you chose

769
00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:29,360
Speaker 5: to be of service. When he asked you, that was

770
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:32,360
Speaker 5: his choice to ask you. When you accepted, that was

771
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:33,480
Speaker 5: your choice to say yes.

772
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:36,560
Speaker 2: Just be like, babe, what you need? Babe, what you need,

773
00:37:36,680 --> 00:37:39,520
Speaker 2: I got you no matter what it is. Don't judge him.

774
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:41,480
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, Like kay, and I will

775
00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,839
Speaker 2: go through the list of things that we want every day.

776
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:47,359
Speaker 2: What you want today? I'm not lying, I'm not lying.

777
00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:49,800
Speaker 1: And it could be something simples like wake up in

778
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:51,520
Speaker 1: the morning, How can I make your day a little

779
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 1: bit lighter fast?

780
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:54,600
Speaker 3: What do you need help with today? How can I

781
00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:56,800
Speaker 3: alleviate some stress? Like something simple like that?

782
00:37:57,360 --> 00:37:59,840
Speaker 1: Because what tends to happen too with our men, particularly

783
00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:02,840
Speaker 1: if there are anything like Devalles. Devala's gonna say I

784
00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:06,000
Speaker 1: got it, I got it until he doesn't.

785
00:38:05,719 --> 00:38:08,040
Speaker 5: Have it, okay, and I'm gonna be mad when she

786
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:10,799
Speaker 5: don't get it. But I never told love, you never

787
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:11,680
Speaker 5: told you know what I'm saying.

788
00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:15,200
Speaker 1: And Devao too had a little breakdown last November after

789
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:17,440
Speaker 1: just the stress of the year and work and everything,

790
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 1: And I in turn now looked.

791
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:22,320
Speaker 3: At myself and I was like, how did I not

792
00:38:22,480 --> 00:38:25,239
Speaker 3: pick up on the fact that my husband was in

793
00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:26,160
Speaker 3: need of something?

794
00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:26,680
Speaker 6: Like?

795
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,400
Speaker 3: How did I miss that? How did I not see it?

796
00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:31,200
Speaker 1: And it was just me always being accustomed to him saying, hey,

797
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,840
Speaker 1: I got it, and I'll be like, I know. So

798
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,800
Speaker 1: I'm so much more deliberate now about asking him in

799
00:38:36,920 --> 00:38:38,160
Speaker 1: real time what is it that you need?

800
00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:39,600
Speaker 3: And it takes the guessing out of it too.

801
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:41,960
Speaker 1: Facts right, while I try to wait for somebody to

802
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:43,880
Speaker 1: figure out what it is you want, say what it

803
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:46,280
Speaker 1: is that you want in real time. When the spouse

804
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 1: or the partner delivers, then you're gonna feel like, Wow,

805
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:52,719
Speaker 1: she or he actually took the time to give me

806
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:55,960
Speaker 1: something that I have requested, took the time to anticipate

807
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:59,359
Speaker 1: my needs. Took the time to anticipate what I may

808
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:02,200
Speaker 1: want in that omen, and then it makes it easier

809
00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 1: for you to then want to reciprocate that because you

810
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,040
Speaker 1: feel taken care of.

811
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 3: It's the business of service.

812
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:08,320
Speaker 1: You can't get married if you don't expect to be

813
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:09,200
Speaker 1: of service to someone.

814
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:09,840
Speaker 2: Facts.

815
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:19,120
Speaker 13: Great question, what's good Chris from Detroit?

816
00:39:19,920 --> 00:39:22,759
Speaker 2: My wife right there. She didn't want me to come

817
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:26,680
Speaker 2: up here. No look or cover her face. You bought

818
00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:33,200
Speaker 2: the tickets Christmas? Please? Okay? So I got a question.

819
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:35,600
Speaker 2: I wrote it so I wouldn't know you wrote it down.

820
00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:37,600
Speaker 3: Organized.

821
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:38,319
Speaker 2: It's not that long.

822
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 3: Better be organized so I know.

823
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:44,960
Speaker 13: You guys have probably had different perspectives on business decisions that.

824
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:46,480
Speaker 2: You needed to that needed to be made.

825
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:50,839
Speaker 13: Have you have you ever brought like all of your

826
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,560
Speaker 13: all of the facts to Kadeen, like you know.

827
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:54,360
Speaker 7: This is what it is.

828
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:55,799
Speaker 5: This is how we Let me tell you something. Let

829
00:39:55,840 --> 00:39:57,520
Speaker 5: me tell you something. There is not a fact in

830
00:39:57,640 --> 00:39:59,960
Speaker 5: my brain that does not go to this woman.

831
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 2: You want to know why?

832
00:40:01,840 --> 00:40:06,640
Speaker 5: It's my life partner, Like there's when I'm talking about numbers,

833
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:09,920
Speaker 5: social security, how and I'm gonna tell you why I'm

834
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 5: gonna tell you, what do you have kids? If something

835
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:15,600
Speaker 5: happens to me tomorrow, Kadeen is gonna have to know

836
00:40:15,719 --> 00:40:18,719
Speaker 5: where the trust is, who gets paid out, what, how

837
00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:20,120
Speaker 5: much is the life insurance?

838
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:23,359
Speaker 2: She so what I'm responsible for all of our wealth

839
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:24,719
Speaker 2: building stuff. That's what I do.

840
00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:26,759
Speaker 5: Me and my partner, We go through all of that.

841
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 5: At the end of every month, I sit my wife down,

842
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:33,120
Speaker 5: I say, look, this is the insurance plan. This is

843
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:35,360
Speaker 5: how much money we have in this account. This is

844
00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:38,440
Speaker 5: how the business works. If something happens to me tomorrow,

845
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:41,879
Speaker 5: these people have to get paid. This has to get done,

846
00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 5: and you have to continue to do this because we

847
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 5: got four kids. So fuck me being dead. There's no

848
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:49,560
Speaker 5: time to gree there's no time to do that.

849
00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 2: You have a responsibility to get it on Jesus. And

850
00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:54,799
Speaker 2: yes we rebuke that. I'm a knock on wood.

851
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:56,320
Speaker 5: I'm a knock on wood because it is snowing like

852
00:40:56,360 --> 00:41:00,759
Speaker 5: a motherfucker out signs. But there isn't a detail in

853
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 5: my life that I don't share with my wife. And

854
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:08,200
Speaker 5: that comes from business to intimacy, because if you choose

855
00:41:08,239 --> 00:41:10,040
Speaker 5: a woman, or you choose a person, and that's the

856
00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:13,239
Speaker 5: person you want to experience everything in life too. You

857
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 5: should feel comfortable just uploading everything on.

858
00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:19,400
Speaker 2: Her and watching her be like, I got you, babe,

859
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,320
Speaker 2: because I asked her to do the same thing for me.

860
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 1: Listen, Devouswo has business acumen. Like whenever you have a couple,

861
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:28,480
Speaker 1: usually one might be stronger at one thing than the other,

862
00:41:29,040 --> 00:41:31,520
Speaker 1: and we understand what our strengths and weaknesses are. So

863
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:35,640
Speaker 1: business acumen is his thing. Finances that's his thing, Creativity

864
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:38,360
Speaker 1: that's his thing. So anything that is in that domain.

865
00:41:38,640 --> 00:41:41,120
Speaker 1: I trust him wholeheartedly to know that he'll never lead

866
00:41:41,160 --> 00:41:43,239
Speaker 1: our family astray. So what I am now as a

867
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:45,839
Speaker 1: team player, because I'm the more organized one. I'll think

868
00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 1: things out, I'll do this a little more.

869
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,480
Speaker 5: I wouldn't even know there was a show today if

870
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:52,760
Speaker 5: she didn't put it on my calendar in my phone.

871
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:54,719
Speaker 1: Devou told his brother to come, oh yeah, come to

872
00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:57,640
Speaker 1: come come visit us March March third, Fourthy we home

873
00:41:57,680 --> 00:41:59,920
Speaker 1: that weekend, I said, Devout, We not home that weekend.

874
00:41:59,640 --> 00:42:02,200
Speaker 2: Bro, She organizes we are in Detroit.

875
00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:06,120
Speaker 1: So it takes that partnership and it's so much sweeter

876
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:08,600
Speaker 1: and it's so much easier when you can celebrate the

877
00:42:08,719 --> 00:42:12,920
Speaker 1: process and the journey, the wins and the losses with

878
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:15,640
Speaker 1: someone to go ahead and involve each other in that.

879
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:17,399
Speaker 3: Are you planning to start a business soon?

880
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:20,839
Speaker 2: Yeah? Well yeah, I wasn't kind of done with the question.

881
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:25,800
Speaker 2: You kind of you know, Oh, my bad, bad? What

882
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:28,640
Speaker 2: was the question? My bad? I don't even remember that.

883
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 3: No, so basically pull the phone back out.

884
00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:34,520
Speaker 2: I got add real bad. You said finance. I was

885
00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:35,759
Speaker 2: just like, finance, what you gotta do?

886
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:37,480
Speaker 3: He didn't say finance? Is that business?

887
00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:38,839
Speaker 2: I didn't even know what she said.

888
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:41,279
Speaker 13: And I answered the question basically like have you ever

889
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:42,600
Speaker 13: brought an idea to her?

890
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:44,879
Speaker 2: And she didn't think it would it will work?

891
00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:45,759
Speaker 13: Yeah?

892
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:46,600
Speaker 4: This, And.

893
00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:51,360
Speaker 2: I'm gonna let you finish the question. Go ahead, and.

894
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:53,640
Speaker 13: Y'all like, how did y'all come to a common ground?

895
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:55,759
Speaker 2: Where like, because you don't want to just listen, no,

896
00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:59,600
Speaker 2: finish finished the question? My bad. I'm sorry. My ad

897
00:42:59,719 --> 00:43:05,120
Speaker 2: D is just my band. That's it, man, I'm fucking

898
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:05,799
Speaker 2: with you. I'm sorry.

899
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 3: We gave you extra, though we gave you extra. It's

900
00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 3: around the question how.

901
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:12,880
Speaker 13: You come to a common ground. You don't want to

902
00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:15,200
Speaker 13: just take control of you be like this, I'm the head.

903
00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:16,439
Speaker 13: This is what I do you know what I'm saying,

904
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 13: But like you still want her opinion to matter, you

905
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:19,879
Speaker 13: know what I'm saying.

906
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 5: So here's here's the biggest thing. Here's the true, true answer,

907
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:26,040
Speaker 5: true answer. Every idea needs a pitch right. When you

908
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:28,480
Speaker 5: have an idea, you got to pitch it right. You

909
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 5: want other people to believe in your idea. If you

910
00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:33,600
Speaker 5: can't have the partner, the person you trusted with your life,

911
00:43:33,719 --> 00:43:36,520
Speaker 5: make them believe in your idea, then you.

912
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:39,640
Speaker 2: Probably picked the wrong partner, or your idea is bullshit.

913
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:41,279
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.

914
00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:44,480
Speaker 5: Like, you should be able to eloquently articulate what the

915
00:43:44,600 --> 00:43:46,960
Speaker 5: idea is and have the woman that love you be like,

916
00:43:47,480 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 5: I see it, babe. And if she don't say I

917
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:51,799
Speaker 5: see it, babe, she still love you enough to be like, babe,

918
00:43:51,880 --> 00:43:55,200
Speaker 5: let's do it. Because she didn't believe in none of this.

919
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 2: When I told her I was retiring from football to

920
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 2: go with it a TV film, she was like, now,

921
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:04,520
Speaker 2: why would you do that?

922
00:44:04,840 --> 00:44:05,480
Speaker 3: Why would you do that?

923
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:07,120
Speaker 2: And I was like, well, the Lions don't want me

924
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:08,520
Speaker 2: no more on they cut me. She's like, you go

925
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:12,479
Speaker 2: to Canada. Canada's right by Detroit. Mace. She had every

926
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:17,200
Speaker 2: other idea. Here's I'm gonna tell you something, as are

927
00:44:17,200 --> 00:44:20,880
Speaker 2: you a dreamer? You're a dreamer. You know who has

928
00:44:20,920 --> 00:44:23,040
Speaker 2: to believe in your dream first you.

929
00:44:24,040 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 5: If you believe in your dream, keep working at it

930
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:29,279
Speaker 5: and make your wife a believe in your dream. And

931
00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:31,960
Speaker 5: if you can eloquently articulate to her what your dream is,

932
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:34,080
Speaker 5: I guarantee you she gonna rock with you and y'all

933
00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:36,399
Speaker 5: gonna build something that's amazing, because that's what we did.

934
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:39,799
Speaker 2: All of this was a dream that I literally told her.

935
00:44:40,120 --> 00:44:41,879
Speaker 5: I wanted to have a show called de Vows Truth

936
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:44,359
Speaker 5: hosted by my wife where I could tell stories about

937
00:44:44,360 --> 00:44:46,879
Speaker 5: the shit that we go through after going on social media.

938
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:48,440
Speaker 5: And then she was like, you're not putting me on

939
00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:52,839
Speaker 5: social media. That's literally what she said twenty fourteen, she said,

940
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:53,759
Speaker 5: devowed is no way.

941
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,759
Speaker 2: And now look we are see what I'm saying. You

942
00:44:57,880 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 2: got it, bro, you got it. Sorry, y'all standing there

943
00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:11,520
Speaker 2: for mad long, My bad.

944
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:13,480
Speaker 3: I think these have to be the last two questions

945
00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 3: here and here.

946
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:17,399
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry, y'all write into listening letters though. If y'all

947
00:45:17,400 --> 00:45:19,279
Speaker 1: are online, I'm sorry about that. We can see what

948
00:45:19,360 --> 00:45:21,040
Speaker 1: y'all all night. I mean, I'm feel like it's gonna

949
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:22,520
Speaker 1: be a big sleepover anyway, because I don't know what

950
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 1: outside looks like.

951
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:26,520
Speaker 3: We should have all brought our sleeping bag and just

952
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 3: hunk her down.

953
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:32,800
Speaker 1: Together because baby, all right, Okay, got your ponytail is fire?

954
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:33,719
Speaker 9: Thank you?

955
00:45:34,160 --> 00:45:36,680
Speaker 3: Okay, Jane, I saw you at the Beauty Plus.

956
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:37,759
Speaker 1: Thank you.

957
00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:39,319
Speaker 9: Okay.

958
00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 3: Before she asked her question, we're best friends. We go

959
00:45:42,239 --> 00:45:45,760
Speaker 3: out all the time, and we always ask this, especially

960
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:47,799
Speaker 3: since she's about to ask us, what do you think

961
00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:53,799
Speaker 3: we do as our occupation? Before she asked her question, so.

962
00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:55,360
Speaker 1: You guys are best friends and you both have the

963
00:45:55,400 --> 00:46:00,920
Speaker 1: same occupation. Yes, y'all are giving nurse vibes. Teacher you

964
00:46:01,040 --> 00:46:02,760
Speaker 1: a teacher, kindergarten teachers.

965
00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:05,560
Speaker 2: I knew that white lady in Detroit. She's definitely teaching.

966
00:46:06,560 --> 00:46:08,839
Speaker 2: Uh huh. You got some of your kids parents in here. Huh.

967
00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:12,400
Speaker 2: But what you say she's gonna give your kids back grades?

968
00:46:12,560 --> 00:46:15,000
Speaker 3: We always run into pearans. But okay, now she wants

969
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,399
Speaker 3: to ask her question. Okay, Okay, So you guys said

970
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:21,879
Speaker 3: nothing was off limits. You guys are very in love.

971
00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:23,359
Speaker 3: I love the way you love each other.

972
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,840
Speaker 9: So I was just wondering if you've ever had a

973
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:27,720
Speaker 9: threesome before?

974
00:46:28,520 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 1: Oohoo, into the think of it, into the think of it. Well,

975
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:38,879
Speaker 1: let's do a poll, All right, let's do a pole.

976
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:40,640
Speaker 1: Someone's to read the book. Yeah, read the book.

977
00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:43,320
Speaker 3: I don't know if we left details about that and

978
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:45,600
Speaker 3: there or not. So we doing three showing hands?

979
00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:48,120
Speaker 1: Yes, how many people think we've done a three son

980
00:46:48,239 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 1: within our twenty years?

981
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:51,279
Speaker 3: Raise your hands high.

982
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:54,360
Speaker 1: Now if you think, yes, the Valencadin have had a

983
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:55,479
Speaker 1: three son, raise your hands.

984
00:46:57,200 --> 00:47:01,360
Speaker 3: And if you think we didn't, raise your hands. She asked,

985
00:47:01,360 --> 00:47:02,239
Speaker 3: you asked if we can.

986
00:47:03,239 --> 00:47:03,399
Speaker 1: Oh.

987
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:11,399
Speaker 2: I was about to say, girl, now, since y'all brought

988
00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:12,880
Speaker 2: it up, I was wondering.

989
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:18,800
Speaker 3: It's real deadass fan over here with a T shirt like, okay, no,

990
00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:22,000
Speaker 3: just kidding where you said, you're on the fence.

991
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:23,520
Speaker 5: M M.

992
00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:27,560
Speaker 3: All right, drum roll please, somebody give me a drum roll.

993
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:31,920
Speaker 3: Deval and I have had a threesome.

994
00:47:32,239 --> 00:47:34,760
Speaker 2: Yes, we had in college.

995
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:39,839
Speaker 3: In college. In college, don't call me and me put

996
00:47:39,880 --> 00:47:43,560
Speaker 3: your phone down. I see you over here. Yeah we did.

997
00:47:43,719 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 3: We didn't in college, Yes we didn't. We were young.

998
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:48,600
Speaker 3: We were experimenting. You know, you heard a sur vibe.

999
00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:50,600
Speaker 3: So it's like all right, let's give it a try.

1000
00:47:50,960 --> 00:47:53,359
Speaker 2: Yes, and we did, and now she hates the woman

1001
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:58,000
Speaker 2: hates her guns.

1002
00:47:58,239 --> 00:47:59,920
Speaker 1: I mean it was it was a situation in the

1003
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:05,319
Speaker 1: moments we did it that was trying to, I guess,

1004
00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:09,440
Speaker 1: let her down easy by maintaining some sort of cordial relationship.

1005
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:15,120
Speaker 2: I was look at y'all, I was trying to.

1006
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:17,000
Speaker 3: Smash and run, and he was trying to be like,

1007
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:18,479
Speaker 3: but no, let's let her off easy.

1008
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:20,680
Speaker 2: And I was like, stop, I guess.

1009
00:48:20,920 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 3: Stop ahead.

1010
00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,120
Speaker 2: All women deserve respect.

1011
00:48:26,120 --> 00:48:28,320
Speaker 5: She look at y'all. Y'all talking about no, how you

1012
00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:32,279
Speaker 5: gonna say no? She engaged in a sexual activity with

1013
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 5: both of us. She can't be treated and discarded like trash.

1014
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:37,000
Speaker 2: You want to know why?

1015
00:48:37,360 --> 00:48:40,400
Speaker 5: You know what women like that do? Fuck your future up?

1016
00:48:42,400 --> 00:48:44,879
Speaker 5: I discarded right from her. Get out of here, Get

1017
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 5: out of here. This is gonna be her. We write

1018
00:48:54,280 --> 00:48:55,759
Speaker 5: a book. We over meet and she come out.

1019
00:48:55,840 --> 00:48:56,400
Speaker 2: We over meet.

1020
00:48:56,480 --> 00:49:03,360
Speaker 5: Huh remember college two thousand and seven? Remember me, No,

1021
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:06,400
Speaker 5: I'm not listen. My uncle and my father told me

1022
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:09,759
Speaker 5: to respect any woman who is going to lay down

1023
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:11,080
Speaker 5: with me and open her legs.

1024
00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:13,000
Speaker 2: That's what my mother and my father. My mother and

1025
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:15,279
Speaker 2: my father and my uncle said, if you.

1026
00:49:15,320 --> 00:49:16,799
Speaker 5: Are going to lay down with me and we're gonna

1027
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:18,759
Speaker 5: engage in something, we want to respect you as a

1028
00:49:18,880 --> 00:49:19,560
Speaker 5: human first.

1029
00:49:20,040 --> 00:49:22,760
Speaker 2: There's no reason why she has to be treated like trash.

1030
00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:24,800
Speaker 2: It's simple. I'm being honest.

1031
00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 1: I wasn't saying trash. But she understood the assignment. We

1032
00:49:27,600 --> 00:49:31,640
Speaker 1: did the thing one time. Keep it pushing sis, all right,

1033
00:49:33,440 --> 00:49:34,480
Speaker 1: you know what she was here for.

1034
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:42,080
Speaker 3: Absolutely she didn't get the assignment. Listen, Okay, it was

1035
00:49:42,160 --> 00:49:44,839
Speaker 3: one time. You know, it was a good time.

1036
00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:46,520
Speaker 2: It wasn't a long time, but you know it was

1037
00:49:46,560 --> 00:49:51,560
Speaker 2: a great time. Though I recorded it, you did, I

1038
00:49:51,680 --> 00:49:53,240
Speaker 2: might drop it on only fans.

1039
00:49:55,719 --> 00:49:59,839
Speaker 3: Stupid good question, though, good question. You know we're gonna

1040
00:49:59,840 --> 00:50:02,000
Speaker 3: be this is what it was. We're in college having

1041
00:50:02,000 --> 00:50:02,440
Speaker 3: a good time.

1042
00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:05,920
Speaker 2: It was fun too. You know, I don't have a think.

1043
00:50:06,840 --> 00:50:09,719
Speaker 2: I don't ever think about it. It be coming in

1044
00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:10,120
Speaker 2: my brain.

1045
00:50:10,160 --> 00:50:12,319
Speaker 3: I'll be like, don't be reminis suit.

1046
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:15,560
Speaker 1: But I usually found I think I mentioned this on

1047
00:50:15,600 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 1: another podcast. Someone had asked me it was like two

1048
00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:18,160
Speaker 1: truths in the line.

1049
00:50:18,239 --> 00:50:18,560
Speaker 3: I said.

1050
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 1: One of the I guess my truth was that I do.

1051
00:50:21,160 --> 00:50:25,080
Speaker 1: We did have a threesome, and it's not negotiable. Now though,

1052
00:50:25,120 --> 00:50:27,160
Speaker 1: that's something that's off the table, like within our marriage.

1053
00:50:27,320 --> 00:50:29,719
Speaker 1: So we were young kids having fun in the time.

1054
00:50:30,200 --> 00:50:32,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm good, man. You be throwing that thing on me,

1055
00:50:32,719 --> 00:50:34,960
Speaker 2: you know, I'll be good, you know.

1056
00:50:36,640 --> 00:50:40,680
Speaker 3: Thanks for your question though, appreciate y'all. All right, and

1057
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:42,160
Speaker 3: the last one of the nights.

1058
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:46,200
Speaker 6: What's up, y'all? So my name is I'm from Detroit

1059
00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:47,560
Speaker 6: currently living in Jersey City.

1060
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:48,319
Speaker 2: What's up?

1061
00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:50,440
Speaker 6: And speaking of women, fucking your future?

1062
00:50:50,520 --> 00:50:50,600
Speaker 5: Up?

1063
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:52,279
Speaker 6: I got a question in the story for you.

1064
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:54,880
Speaker 3: Oh lord, one segue into another.

1065
00:50:55,160 --> 00:50:56,080
Speaker 2: You here by yourself?

1066
00:50:56,600 --> 00:50:58,600
Speaker 6: No, okay, but it's not her.

1067
00:50:58,880 --> 00:51:00,640
Speaker 3: It's not her, okay, all right.

1068
00:51:00,680 --> 00:51:02,640
Speaker 14: So I'm a recording artist in R and B, and

1069
00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:05,120
Speaker 14: I moved to Jersey City to pursue my first record

1070
00:51:05,160 --> 00:51:09,160
Speaker 14: deal under Sony. And as a fellow entertainer, I know

1071
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 14: you hear him bro sing something Dune't you thember.

1072
00:51:13,719 --> 00:51:14,440
Speaker 7: You told me?

1073
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 6: Love me?

1074
00:51:15,360 --> 00:51:19,880
Speaker 2: Babe? Babe? Okay, okay, I.

1075
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:21,160
Speaker 6: See you favorite artists.

1076
00:51:22,239 --> 00:51:24,800
Speaker 14: But so as a fellow entertainer, you know, we're constantly

1077
00:51:24,800 --> 00:51:28,400
Speaker 14: surrounded by women, beautiful women, all different races, ages, et cetera.

1078
00:51:29,080 --> 00:51:29,880
Speaker 6: I'm also.

1079
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:33,320
Speaker 2: Detroit going let me tell you something, Detroit gonna be

1080
00:51:33,360 --> 00:51:35,399
Speaker 2: the man. We didn't.

1081
00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:39,880
Speaker 5: We didn't have fabulousity twenty two. Joke up, Josh, Now

1082
00:51:40,040 --> 00:51:43,840
Speaker 5: somebody told umbout singing something else right now, sing something about.

1083
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:52,440
Speaker 11: Right now, sing Nextwell, but no, this is this is real.

1084
00:51:52,520 --> 00:51:57,439
Speaker 11: This is just happened two weeks ago, So no, go ahead.

1085
00:51:58,280 --> 00:51:59,520
Speaker 6: My Chelly.

1086
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:05,080
Speaker 11: Lovely has a simmers day ahead.

1087
00:52:07,520 --> 00:52:09,920
Speaker 14: So I'm an entertainer right surrounded by a lot of

1088
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:12,320
Speaker 14: beautiful women. And the reason why this is a tricky

1089
00:52:12,360 --> 00:52:15,040
Speaker 14: subject because I just found out that one of the

1090
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:17,279
Speaker 14: women that's a part of my team, I have two

1091
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:19,279
Speaker 14: other businesses and she's a part of my music career.

1092
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 14: She's a semi up andcoming choreographer. She's a part of

1093
00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:26,200
Speaker 14: my other two businesses, a vital person. But I found

1094
00:52:26,239 --> 00:52:30,600
Speaker 14: out through somebody homeboy, that she's trying to sabotage me

1095
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:33,640
Speaker 14: get into a relationship. She wants to break it up

1096
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:36,799
Speaker 14: or avoid me from falling in love because she wants

1097
00:52:36,840 --> 00:52:39,719
Speaker 14: to make sure that one we have a situation and

1098
00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:42,400
Speaker 14: two it would make my career more desirable as an

1099
00:52:42,480 --> 00:52:46,640
Speaker 14: R and B singer. So, paulse the reason why this

1100
00:52:46,800 --> 00:52:49,520
Speaker 14: is not easy to give up, right is because we

1101
00:52:49,640 --> 00:52:50,439
Speaker 14: make a great team.

1102
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:56,879
Speaker 2: How you don't know. You don't however, now, no, no, however.

1103
00:52:56,800 --> 00:52:58,680
Speaker 5: Bro, bro let me stop you, Let me stop you.

1104
00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:01,800
Speaker 5: How do you make a great team with someone you

1105
00:53:01,960 --> 00:53:04,200
Speaker 5: know is trying to sabotage? And I just kind of

1106
00:53:04,239 --> 00:53:06,640
Speaker 5: team you're trying to build? Just found out, I just

1107
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 5: found out two weeks ago.

1108
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:10,759
Speaker 2: How much more Timmy the I got you?

1109
00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:11,080
Speaker 7: Brother?

1110
00:53:11,160 --> 00:53:11,400
Speaker 6: Hold on?

1111
00:53:11,640 --> 00:53:14,319
Speaker 2: How old are you? I'm twenty nine, twenty nine? That's

1112
00:53:14,360 --> 00:53:15,600
Speaker 2: that's why go ahead and finish it.

1113
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:22,440
Speaker 14: So as a man, there's temptation around, right, yes, how

1114
00:53:22,560 --> 00:53:24,440
Speaker 14: do you avoid temptation?

1115
00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:27,280
Speaker 6: Because women you have to kind of feed a fantasy?

1116
00:53:28,400 --> 00:53:31,680
Speaker 14: And then two, Kadeen, how do you what makes you

1117
00:53:31,760 --> 00:53:34,239
Speaker 14: feel secure with your man being in an entertainment space

1118
00:53:34,280 --> 00:53:36,680
Speaker 14: where a lot of women are thirsty and also seeking

1119
00:53:36,719 --> 00:53:37,279
Speaker 14: after your man?

1120
00:53:37,719 --> 00:53:40,239
Speaker 6: Honestly, So this is the first thing.

1121
00:53:41,040 --> 00:53:43,480
Speaker 2: Kadeen and I talked about this the other night.

1122
00:53:44,400 --> 00:53:47,320
Speaker 5: In college, there were times where we gave each other breaks.

1123
00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:49,680
Speaker 5: There were times where we went and tried to talk

1124
00:53:49,719 --> 00:53:53,680
Speaker 5: to other people because I never felt obligated to be here,

1125
00:53:54,239 --> 00:53:56,520
Speaker 5: and I'm making a choice to be here. I make

1126
00:53:56,600 --> 00:53:59,239
Speaker 5: that choice every single day. There isn't a woman that

1127
00:53:59,360 --> 00:54:01,520
Speaker 5: walks by me. I don't care how good she looks,

1128
00:54:02,160 --> 00:54:04,240
Speaker 5: that is gonna make me choose her over my wife.

1129
00:54:04,760 --> 00:54:05,760
Speaker 2: I had that option.

1130
00:54:05,719 --> 00:54:08,800
Speaker 5: Before, you know what I'm saying, when we weren't married,

1131
00:54:08,960 --> 00:54:11,320
Speaker 5: When we were out here playing around and I was

1132
00:54:11,400 --> 00:54:13,080
Speaker 5: playing around. There was times we was both like, yo,

1133
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:15,040
Speaker 5: we need to give each other space. Because she'll tell

1134
00:54:15,080 --> 00:54:17,920
Speaker 5: you this too. I've asked her this question since college.

1135
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:20,399
Speaker 5: I say, you sure you don't ever want to try

1136
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:23,080
Speaker 5: to date anybody else? Because what I don't want is

1137
00:54:23,120 --> 00:54:25,680
Speaker 5: for you to wake up at sixty years old, look

1138
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:28,880
Speaker 5: over at me and say, I wish I would have

1139
00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:29,800
Speaker 5: did some other things.

1140
00:54:30,320 --> 00:54:32,600
Speaker 2: We gave each other the space and time to do

1141
00:54:32,680 --> 00:54:34,239
Speaker 2: what we want to do and make a choice to

1142
00:54:34,320 --> 00:54:34,640
Speaker 2: be here.

1143
00:54:35,560 --> 00:54:38,120
Speaker 5: Now that I've been here, because I've been with other

1144
00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:39,840
Speaker 5: women and done other things, I knew I made the

1145
00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:42,440
Speaker 5: choice that was gonna make me a better man. For example,

1146
00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:46,840
Speaker 5: she not gonna purposely sabotage me, you know what I'm saying.

1147
00:54:47,280 --> 00:54:50,520
Speaker 5: So it don't matter how good she look. If you're

1148
00:54:50,520 --> 00:54:53,759
Speaker 5: gonna mess up my legacy, my family, my kids.

1149
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:54,600
Speaker 2: There's no way.

1150
00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:57,520
Speaker 5: I don't even maturity will happen like you get older

1151
00:54:57,520 --> 00:55:00,480
Speaker 5: and you'll realize like that shit is not worse, bro,

1152
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,600
Speaker 5: It's not sleeping with someone you work with, no matter

1153
00:55:03,680 --> 00:55:04,320
Speaker 5: how good.

1154
00:55:04,239 --> 00:55:07,160
Speaker 2: They look, is not worth it. You'll realize it now.

1155
00:55:07,480 --> 00:55:09,279
Speaker 5: I don't expect you to know what twenty nine because

1156
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:11,880
Speaker 5: of twenty nine too, Devo was kind of like what

1157
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:15,279
Speaker 5: I But when you start to have kids and you

1158
00:55:15,360 --> 00:55:18,800
Speaker 5: start to focus on being the best version of yourself,

1159
00:55:19,239 --> 00:55:20,399
Speaker 5: you'll realize that some things.

1160
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:22,359
Speaker 3: You're just not worth it, bro, That's a fact.

1161
00:55:23,840 --> 00:55:26,360
Speaker 1: And to answer your question, first of all, plot twist,

1162
00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:28,560
Speaker 1: what if your homeboy said this because he was trying

1163
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:29,480
Speaker 1: to sabotage you.

1164
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:33,719
Speaker 6: I got confirmation for somebody else who's friends with her.

1165
00:55:33,800 --> 00:55:35,320
Speaker 1: Okay, I was just make sure because you know me,

1166
00:55:35,320 --> 00:55:36,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be done with advocate and be like, well,

1167
00:55:36,960 --> 00:55:39,120
Speaker 1: let's look at it from this angle. One thing I've

1168
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:41,120
Speaker 1: learned early on is that no one can teach me

1169
00:55:41,239 --> 00:55:43,680
Speaker 1: to be secure, right. I have to be secure. It's

1170
00:55:43,719 --> 00:55:47,000
Speaker 1: not Devou's responsibility to make me secure. I have to

1171
00:55:47,040 --> 00:55:49,120
Speaker 1: work on that by myself and because I'm in a

1172
00:55:49,600 --> 00:55:51,840
Speaker 1: secure space knowing what I have to offer within this

1173
00:55:51,960 --> 00:55:54,640
Speaker 1: relationship on what I bring on a daily basis not

1174
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:58,040
Speaker 1: only as a wife for the mom, but everything in totality.

1175
00:55:59,360 --> 00:56:02,480
Speaker 3: He knows what he is. I don't gotta worry about

1176
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:02,759
Speaker 3: none of that.

1177
00:56:02,800 --> 00:56:04,439
Speaker 1: He can have as many sex sees as he wants,

1178
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:05,799
Speaker 1: he can do whatever you want on TV.

1179
00:56:05,920 --> 00:56:09,360
Speaker 3: But baby, he's gonna come home, and I'm confident in that.

1180
00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:12,040
Speaker 3: So that's something for me that I just could rest

1181
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:14,239
Speaker 3: easy at night. And this man stays all over me.

1182
00:56:14,320 --> 00:56:15,719
Speaker 3: Y'all know if you can tell y'all see how you'll

1183
00:56:15,719 --> 00:56:16,480
Speaker 3: be looking at me up here?

1184
00:56:16,640 --> 00:56:18,399
Speaker 2: What you gonna do when I come home? Though, That's

1185
00:56:18,520 --> 00:56:20,040
Speaker 2: that's the next question they want to know.

1186
00:56:20,640 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 3: Now, I'm gonna swing from this shandily because why you

1187
00:56:24,640 --> 00:56:26,520
Speaker 3: got snips? So I got no fans, no more?

1188
00:56:27,239 --> 00:56:30,040
Speaker 2: You know? Is that ponytail secured? That's all I want

1189
00:56:30,080 --> 00:56:35,720
Speaker 2: to know. I'm trying, no, not seriously, bro. I appreciate

1190
00:56:35,760 --> 00:56:38,600
Speaker 2: the question, but that's not your career. It's not easy.

1191
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:40,240
Speaker 2: It's not easy.

1192
00:56:40,640 --> 00:56:42,360
Speaker 5: And when people tell you when you get married that

1193
00:56:42,440 --> 00:56:46,040
Speaker 5: all the temptation goes away, it don't it don't. I've

1194
00:56:46,080 --> 00:56:50,800
Speaker 5: been married twelve years, we've been together twenty years, almost

1195
00:56:50,840 --> 00:56:51,600
Speaker 5: twenty one years.

1196
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,640
Speaker 2: A fine woman walk by, it's still gonna look.

1197
00:56:54,719 --> 00:56:55,440
Speaker 3: I'm gonna look too.

1198
00:56:55,840 --> 00:56:58,240
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, beautiful woman like that never changes.

1199
00:56:58,280 --> 00:57:00,440
Speaker 5: And anyone tells you when you meet the right one,

1200
00:57:00,520 --> 00:57:03,160
Speaker 5: you stop looking, they fucking lying, because what will happen

1201
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:05,560
Speaker 5: is you'll meet the right one and you'll still looking.

1202
00:57:05,600 --> 00:57:07,920
Speaker 2: You'll be like, what's wrong with me? Or you'll say

1203
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:10,080
Speaker 2: what's wrong with her that she can't keep my attention?

1204
00:57:10,680 --> 00:57:11,320
Speaker 2: It ain't about that.

1205
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:14,040
Speaker 5: It's about you making a choice, and as long as

1206
00:57:14,080 --> 00:57:16,120
Speaker 5: you make the choice within your best interest, you'll do good.

1207
00:57:16,680 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 3: Absolutely, sir, Oh my god, that was just a rate

1208
00:57:19,360 --> 00:57:21,439
Speaker 3: list the letter question. Yes, it was, for sure.

1209
00:57:22,200 --> 00:57:24,120
Speaker 2: Let me ask a questions. Y'all have a good time tonight?

1210
00:57:25,600 --> 00:57:25,920
Speaker 3: Did you?

1211
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:28,440
Speaker 1: Oh? Man, you gotta keep looking out in the audience.

1212
00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:30,320
Speaker 1: And oh, I'm so happy y'all were with us tonight.

1213
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 1: We had such a good time. I feel like we

1214
00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:32,960
Speaker 1: could have been here all night. I'm like, shit, I

1215
00:57:33,000 --> 00:57:34,800
Speaker 1: didn't even look at the time. We don't hold y'all

1216
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:38,120
Speaker 1: up all night, but we thank y'all so much for coming.

1217
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:39,640
Speaker 1: You want to close out the show?

1218
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:46,240
Speaker 2: Can everybody stand up? Please? Fix my tight shirt?

1219
00:57:47,320 --> 00:57:49,440
Speaker 3: You definitely ripped your shirt too. Did you see that

1220
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:53,920
Speaker 3: it's ripped? Some swoll get you swo so.

1221
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:59,760
Speaker 5: This is the part of the show that I love

1222
00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:03,320
Speaker 5: the most other than listener letters, right, and it's because

1223
00:58:03,320 --> 00:58:03,480
Speaker 5: of this.

1224
00:58:04,440 --> 00:58:07,720
Speaker 2: One of my cast mates that I work with, his

1225
00:58:07,840 --> 00:58:08,760
Speaker 2: name is cam Say Yo.

1226
00:58:08,760 --> 00:58:11,560
Speaker 5: Devow, You're one of the greatest manifestos that I know

1227
00:58:12,000 --> 00:58:15,480
Speaker 5: because everything that you've said has come to light. Everything

1228
00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:18,120
Speaker 5: you said was gonna happen is actually happening. And I

1229
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:20,160
Speaker 5: want to do an exercise with y'all that I do

1230
00:58:21,240 --> 00:58:25,720
Speaker 5: every morning. All Right, I want everybody to close your eyes.

1231
00:58:29,240 --> 00:58:34,520
Speaker 5: I want you to think about your biggest dream, the

1232
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:38,160
Speaker 5: perfect job, the amount of money you want to make,

1233
00:58:39,360 --> 00:58:43,360
Speaker 5: the love of your life, the house that you want

1234
00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:45,320
Speaker 5: to retire in, and the car you want to drive.

1235
00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:48,520
Speaker 5: I want you to think about the career that you're

1236
00:58:48,520 --> 00:58:53,280
Speaker 5: going to choose that's gonna give you purpose and financial security.

1237
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:58,800
Speaker 5: Can everybody see it? Can I tell you something. If

1238
00:58:58,840 --> 00:59:02,520
Speaker 5: you can see it, it's already happened. And if it's

1239
00:59:02,560 --> 00:59:05,240
Speaker 5: already happened, all you have to do is open your

1240
00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:11,439
Speaker 5: eyes and claim it. Claim it for yourself the same

1241
00:59:11,520 --> 00:59:15,480
Speaker 5: way I claim for myself. This woman you see right here,

1242
00:59:16,480 --> 00:59:19,720
Speaker 5: all of you, you see right here. The money we

1243
00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 5: all gonna make, the houses we all gonna buy the

1244
00:59:24,160 --> 00:59:28,080
Speaker 5: cars we all gonna drive and the people that we

1245
00:59:28,200 --> 00:59:31,240
Speaker 5: are gonna pay it forward to, because when you give

1246
00:59:31,280 --> 00:59:34,520
Speaker 5: a chance to live in abundance, you have a fiduciary

1247
00:59:34,600 --> 00:59:37,680
Speaker 5: responsibility to always pay it forward.

1248
00:59:38,840 --> 00:59:40,360
Speaker 2: Give yourself a round of applause.

1249
00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:42,280
Speaker 3: Yes, we love y'all, Detroit.

1250
00:59:43,720 --> 00:59:47,080
Speaker 2: So before we leave out of here, we're gonna do

1251
00:59:47,120 --> 00:59:50,440
Speaker 2: what ellis goodbye? Yes, do y'all know what Eli's goodbye is?

1252
00:59:51,280 --> 00:59:52,040
Speaker 3: What does it look like?

1253
00:59:53,480 --> 00:59:55,600
Speaker 5: L's goodbye is when you pat yourself on the chest

1254
00:59:55,680 --> 00:59:57,560
Speaker 5: twice and you say peace.

1255
00:59:58,880 --> 01:00:00,680
Speaker 2: I love y'all everybody. How are we gonna do this?

1256
01:00:00,760 --> 01:00:05,400
Speaker 2: To the camera? I need an others goodbye? On three

1257
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:08,000
Speaker 2: one two three.

1258
01:00:16,760 --> 01:00:19,840
Speaker 4: Dead Ass is a production of iHeartMedia podcast network, and

1259
01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:23,440
Speaker 4: it's produced by Donor Opinya and Triple Follow the podcast

1260
01:00:23,520 --> 01:00:26,120
Speaker 4: on social media at dead Ass the podcast and Never

1261
01:00:26,200 --> 01:00:26,640
Speaker 4: miss a Thing.