1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:01,120 Speaker 1: What's up, everybody? 2 00:00:01,160 --> 00:00:04,000 Speaker 2: Welcome to another edition of Bombing with Eric Andre, the 3 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:06,800 Speaker 2: podcast where I talk with friends, comedians, musicians, and other 4 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,479 Speaker 2: creative people about their worst moments on stage, at life, 5 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:12,200 Speaker 2: really anywhere in this dimension. Today we have a good friend, 6 00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:14,800 Speaker 2: comedian Sydney Washington on the podcast, who sat down with 7 00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:16,639 Speaker 2: us to talk about how she started to fire at 8 00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:20,720 Speaker 2: her childhood home and how to survive a breakup akaa relationship. 9 00:00:20,800 --> 00:00:22,200 Speaker 1: Bomb. Let's get into it. 10 00:00:24,960 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 3: Bombing with Eric Andre. 11 00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:34,680 Speaker 1: So you know the premise, Yeah, you have some stories 12 00:00:34,720 --> 00:00:35,080 Speaker 1: lined up. 13 00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:37,839 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, of course, and a recent too recent bombs. 14 00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:40,760 Speaker 4: When I got the email, I was like, bombit. I 15 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:42,639 Speaker 4: don't know nothing about that, And then I was like. 16 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:44,320 Speaker 1: Actually, can you tell us what happened. 17 00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:46,880 Speaker 4: I'll start with the one that was like maybe three 18 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:50,480 Speaker 4: months ago. I was in Detroit. I was in House 19 00:00:50,479 --> 00:00:51,000 Speaker 4: of Comedy. 20 00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,720 Speaker 1: You're touring or just one off went off. 21 00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:56,480 Speaker 4: I've been hitting up spots, but I haven't like, actually 22 00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 4: put you know, do the the graphic. We're on tour. 23 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:01,960 Speaker 4: You know, I didn't do anyth of that. So I'm 24 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:06,640 Speaker 4: in Detroit House of Comedy. Meanwhile, it's it's the home 25 00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:10,520 Speaker 4: of where my ex lives. She is in Detroit. 26 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:11,760 Speaker 1: She moves in the audience. 27 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:15,960 Speaker 4: No, No, she was actually gonna come see a show. Think 28 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:21,200 Speaker 4: she moved back to Detroit, she bought a house. She is, 29 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:25,679 Speaker 4: we're lesbians. Of course, we're still friends. We're still in 30 00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:28,720 Speaker 4: the group, chat together with her family, and she has 31 00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:32,039 Speaker 4: a new girlfriend and we're all BFFs. It's fine. We're 32 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 4: living great. So I'm there in Detroit, I'm feeling I'm 33 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 4: feeling good. I was like, this is gonna be a 34 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:42,720 Speaker 4: great weekend. No, Jill Scott is performing across the streets 35 00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:47,680 Speaker 4: from House of Comedy, and it is sold out. And 36 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:52,840 Speaker 4: then two doors down, I think Mike Epps, people from 37 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:54,680 Speaker 4: Wilding Out, Nick Cannon. 38 00:01:54,680 --> 00:01:58,200 Speaker 1: Are So the audience was spread spread out. 39 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:02,080 Speaker 4: The whole strip was of important people that was way 40 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:04,280 Speaker 4: more important than me. So when I tell you the 41 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:05,360 Speaker 4: sales were low. 42 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:08,280 Speaker 1: I don't like to hear you say that. Why of 43 00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:09,040 Speaker 1: equal importance? 44 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:12,120 Speaker 4: Of equal importance. Yes, But when I tell you, when 45 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:14,640 Speaker 4: I walked into the room, it was not. It showed 46 00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 4: me that. I was like, oh, wow, are people here? 47 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 1: So so it was empty. 48 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 4: It was not empty, but it also was not it 49 00:02:22,840 --> 00:02:25,400 Speaker 4: was it was it was It was probably like twenty 50 00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:27,919 Speaker 4: people and it was a it's a big, pretty big room. 51 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 4: So the first show was because I did four shows. 52 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:37,320 Speaker 4: So the first show was decent, you know, a small crowd, 53 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:39,400 Speaker 4: but they you know, they fuck with me, so it 54 00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:44,480 Speaker 4: was great. The next show, it started pouring raining, pouring raining, 55 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:46,960 Speaker 4: and it took us a while to get people in, 56 00:02:47,040 --> 00:02:48,520 Speaker 4: and they were like, we might have to call it 57 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:51,360 Speaker 4: and I said, if we call it, God's plan, but 58 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:56,519 Speaker 4: they didn't. A group of fifteen older black people come 59 00:02:56,560 --> 00:02:59,959 Speaker 4: in and I said, yes, that's who. That's smart people. 60 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:03,000 Speaker 4: He was so good. I was like, family's here. But 61 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:05,800 Speaker 4: then I was like, I actually hate my family. Why 62 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,640 Speaker 4: this is a bad time. So I start talking about 63 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:15,680 Speaker 4: I'm gay. They immediately they were like absolutely not. So 64 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:19,640 Speaker 4: then I'm like I'm literally ten minutes in and I'm like, 65 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,760 Speaker 4: oh shit, I got a whole hour. These people really 66 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:25,960 Speaker 4: not fucking with me. So they're not laughing with me, 67 00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:28,560 Speaker 4: they're laughing at me. And now they're yelling at me. 68 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:31,440 Speaker 4: They're like, you just haven't had the right dick yet, 69 00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:35,120 Speaker 4: that type of that type of homophobia. They were like, 70 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:38,240 Speaker 4: God will take care of you like that yelling at me, 71 00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:42,640 Speaker 4: and it's like not it's a small room, so echoing, 72 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:47,080 Speaker 4: you're bouncing off and there's like men, women, cousins, all this, 73 00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 4: and so I stopped. I said, wait a minute, why 74 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 4: are y'all here? And they always like one of the women, 75 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:55,920 Speaker 4: our cousin told us to come here, and so I 76 00:03:55,960 --> 00:03:58,200 Speaker 4: was like, so it's your fault. So then they all 77 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:00,000 Speaker 4: start laughing because I was like, so it's your fault 78 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:03,440 Speaker 4: because that everybody hates them because you didn't tell them 79 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 4: that I'm gay. And I was like, so you know 80 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,200 Speaker 4: what that means, you're gay, because they're trying to figure 81 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:11,240 Speaker 4: out why the fuck you want to come see me. 82 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:16,600 Speaker 4: So then they said any and every homophobic thing that 83 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:23,360 Speaker 4: you could possibly say, and the club no security. They 84 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 4: could have rushed, they could have did a hate rhyme. Yeah, 85 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 4: Stacey Adams shoe at me. It could have happened to me. 86 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 4: Nobody stopped them. It was so bad that the young 87 00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:46,240 Speaker 4: white girls were like, we like your jeans. I said, Susan, 88 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:49,920 Speaker 4: you're not saying it's not a helpful thing. 89 00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 5: Were they like hostile, like like were they like middle 90 00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 5: school kids? 91 00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:59,400 Speaker 4: Oh? No, no, no, they were hatred in their Yes, yeah, 92 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:02,039 Speaker 4: there was one that I had asked him a question. 93 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:03,920 Speaker 4: He's like, I'm not listening to you, and then they 94 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:09,440 Speaker 4: all laughed. It felt like cafeteria, right, but for people 95 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:12,920 Speaker 4: who are almost in a nursing home. So it was 96 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:17,720 Speaker 4: I had never and and then again I'm waiting. I 97 00:05:17,760 --> 00:05:19,599 Speaker 4: was like, this would be a perfect time for my 98 00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:22,200 Speaker 4: ex to just roll up, roll up with her girlfriend 99 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:25,279 Speaker 4: to come see this and be like, yes, I'm in 100 00:05:25,320 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 4: a better place. This is why we broke up, you 101 00:05:27,640 --> 00:05:30,560 Speaker 4: know what I mean, and the whole and they would 102 00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:33,440 Speaker 4: interact with me. They would laugh when I speak to 103 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:36,119 Speaker 4: them because they thought that was funny. But they would 104 00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:39,400 Speaker 4: not leave. They would not leave, and I needed money, 105 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 4: so I'll tell I'll take the homophobia for the check. 106 00:05:42,279 --> 00:05:44,040 Speaker 4: I was like, well, I'm not going to back out. 107 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,559 Speaker 4: I did a whole hour. I did the whole hour. 108 00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:51,360 Speaker 4: I tried to I try to buy some of them shots. 109 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:55,520 Speaker 4: They didn't want my gay shots. They didn't want nothing. 110 00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:57,279 Speaker 4: The women I try to like. At the end, I 111 00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:00,279 Speaker 4: was like, thank you so much for staying. They want 112 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:03,560 Speaker 4: no parts of me. They thought I was. There was 113 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,440 Speaker 4: one guy that was like talking to me, but he 114 00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:08,920 Speaker 4: was thinking, like, you're not really gay, and it's like sir, 115 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:17,280 Speaker 4: my strap is in my person the research, I'm definitely 116 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:22,000 Speaker 4: a homosexual. Yeah, but it was it was scary because 117 00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:25,000 Speaker 4: I was like, anything can happen. But also it was 118 00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 4: like disappointing black people is a different type of disapplinance. 119 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:35,040 Speaker 4: You feel like you let down your ancestors. You're like, 120 00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:39,919 Speaker 4: Sojourner Truth is rolling over in her grave. Harriet Tubman 121 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:43,640 Speaker 4: did not free slaves for this, for this, for me 122 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:47,919 Speaker 4: to bomb in Detroit at the House of Comedy. And 123 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:50,240 Speaker 4: so that was the first night. So then the next 124 00:06:50,279 --> 00:06:55,920 Speaker 4: day I tell my agent, I'm like, I'm in turmoil. 125 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:57,919 Speaker 4: I'm just like i gotta leave. I gotta get on 126 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:00,760 Speaker 4: the next flight out of here. And she's like, okay, 127 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,719 Speaker 4: I'm gonna talk to them. You don't have to do tonight. 128 00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:04,760 Speaker 4: And I said, oh no, I'm gonna need that money. 129 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:06,840 Speaker 4: I'm gonna need to go in to back. I said, 130 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:12,000 Speaker 4: I'm gonna go back. I needed the back. And it 131 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,080 Speaker 4: wasn't even a back, it wasn't even a bad And 132 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:15,880 Speaker 4: they were like, this is so funny. Because the girl, 133 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:19,640 Speaker 4: the girl who was here last week, it was a snowstorm, 134 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:22,320 Speaker 4: so we had to cancel one of her shows. And 135 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,440 Speaker 4: then The next day, like fifteen people showed up. It 136 00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:28,480 Speaker 4: was Embetazine. I said, so, y'all hate women. I was 137 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:31,640 Speaker 4: a house of comedy hates women. So it's not just me. 138 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:33,600 Speaker 1: This house of comedy a big Detroit. 139 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:34,480 Speaker 4: Yeah. 140 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:37,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, No show I did on my tour in North 141 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:37,960 Speaker 1: America was Detroit. 142 00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:38,800 Speaker 4: Oh, I believe it. 143 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 1: Toughest audience. Oh, Philly and Detroit were tough. 144 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 5: No. 145 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 4: I love Philly, Philly love me down, but. 146 00:07:45,520 --> 00:07:47,720 Speaker 1: It was Philly was tough. I might have just been off, 147 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:48,840 Speaker 1: but Detroit was tough. 148 00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:51,760 Speaker 4: They don't want to when I tell you, they did 149 00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 4: not leave. It was like you hate me. Leave. They 150 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,160 Speaker 4: were said no, no, I pay my money. I'm gonna make 151 00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:57,080 Speaker 4: you uncomfortable. 152 00:07:57,200 --> 00:07:57,680 Speaker 1: Yeah. 153 00:07:57,720 --> 00:08:00,320 Speaker 4: And I looked in their eyes and they were like, no, 154 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:04,280 Speaker 4: we're staying until you dropped the mic. I think they 155 00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:07,040 Speaker 4: wanted to bully me into stopping. And I said, oh, 156 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:10,120 Speaker 4: I'm doing my whole hour. I'm talking to you, we're 157 00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 4: doing and they were like one woman walked out and 158 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,200 Speaker 4: she's like, I'm gonna pray for you. I really am, 159 00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:19,240 Speaker 4: I really am gonna pray. And I said, man, all right. 160 00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 4: But the next day I did two shows and they 161 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 4: were great. I talked to the people on the top. 162 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,640 Speaker 4: I said, no, we're not doing what we did last night. 163 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,120 Speaker 4: I don't know if you were here last night. I'm 164 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:30,880 Speaker 4: sure you weren't. But I am gay. We're starting up top. 165 00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,200 Speaker 4: I am gay. If you do not like gays or 166 00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:36,199 Speaker 4: blacks or women, get the fuck out. And they all 167 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 4: clapped and they were happy. 168 00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:39,840 Speaker 1: Horses. 169 00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm not doing this for y'all. And I said, 170 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,920 Speaker 4: I'm putting my phone on live, so anything happened, I'm 171 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,000 Speaker 4: going viral. I'm going viral, and you're seeing your face 172 00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:50,400 Speaker 4: and you won't be able to go to your post 173 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:56,000 Speaker 4: office after this. I will ruin your supermarket experience if 174 00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:58,520 Speaker 4: you fuck with me. And they got it together and 175 00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,359 Speaker 4: they were happy. 176 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:00,240 Speaker 1: Should do that all the time time. 177 00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:03,199 Speaker 4: I didn't want to do that. I was like, you 178 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:03,720 Speaker 4: don't want. 179 00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:05,240 Speaker 1: To have to do that. Yeah, why do you have 180 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:05,760 Speaker 1: to do that? 181 00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:07,360 Speaker 4: You paid to have a good time? 182 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 2: Why? 183 00:09:07,960 --> 00:09:08,440 Speaker 1: Yeah? 184 00:09:08,559 --> 00:09:12,040 Speaker 4: AnyWho? So that bomb it shook me to my core. 185 00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:14,839 Speaker 4: I said, oh, I need to go work at the 186 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,800 Speaker 4: d m B. This is not for me. I'm not 187 00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 4: I'm not a comedian. I'm back. 188 00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,560 Speaker 1: I'm bad. That's isolated. 189 00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:25,640 Speaker 4: And someone messaged me and they were like, you handled 190 00:09:25,679 --> 00:09:29,120 Speaker 4: it so well, and even if you were not doing well, 191 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,520 Speaker 4: I was going to stay the whole show. I said, 192 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:35,480 Speaker 4: all right, Sis, that didn't help. That didn't help me. 193 00:09:35,559 --> 00:09:38,800 Speaker 4: You're letting me know. So it was bad, but you 194 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:44,200 Speaker 4: handled it quite well. Grace I had grace. So yeah, 195 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:45,719 Speaker 4: that one I was like, I don't think I'll ever 196 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:47,880 Speaker 4: be back to Detroit. I think I'm good on Detroit. 197 00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: Might have been a fluke. I did live in Detroit 198 00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:52,480 Speaker 1: one time and there was like a fight, a fist 199 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 1: fight on that. 200 00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 4: It feels like Eric and yeah, no fine, actually pay Yeah, 201 00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:04,319 Speaker 4: someone throwing them bows with Eric Andre in the background 202 00:10:04,360 --> 00:10:06,839 Speaker 4: that I would love to see the graphic for that. 203 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:08,240 Speaker 4: Did you videotape it? 204 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 1: No, this is early tour. It was fucking It was crazy. Yeah, 205 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,880 Speaker 1: it was crazy. It was crazy, like escalated quickly. 206 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:18,520 Speaker 4: I mean, it happens because you just you just don't 207 00:10:18,559 --> 00:10:20,199 Speaker 4: expect such foolishness. 208 00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:23,280 Speaker 5: It was a white kid on stage that said something 209 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,040 Speaker 5: to a black guy in the audience and like it 210 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:29,320 Speaker 5: wasn't The guy didn't. The white kid didn't say anything racist, 211 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 5: but I think he was trying to be like ironic 212 00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:32,640 Speaker 5: and like be funny. 213 00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:35,360 Speaker 1: Too, and the guy was like are you talking about me? 214 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:40,160 Speaker 5: Thank you and jumped on stage destroying it in the 215 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:41,040 Speaker 5: middle of an interview. 216 00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 4: And Byron is the funniest to for that to happen 217 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:51,559 Speaker 4: because his facial expressions and he might even egg some. 218 00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 1: Shit on yeah oh yeah, yeah. He didn't help. 219 00:10:53,559 --> 00:10:55,960 Speaker 4: Yeah, no, no, he was like, no, I love this. He 220 00:10:56,080 --> 00:11:00,200 Speaker 4: lives for this. Yet He's like, why would we stop? 221 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:05,200 Speaker 4: This is good? Yeah? So yeah, that that one. You 222 00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:07,719 Speaker 4: need a good bomb to shake you and then make 223 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:09,720 Speaker 4: you be like, I gotta go back to the drawing board, 224 00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:12,200 Speaker 4: I gotta write again. I gotta, you know, delete my 225 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:13,880 Speaker 4: ex's number. Stuff like that. 226 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:18,760 Speaker 3: With Ari Codre. 227 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:30,480 Speaker 1: With are cod Prey, what is the worst bomb You've 228 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:33,040 Speaker 1: ever seen? And what's the most wasted You've been on stage? 229 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:36,520 Speaker 4: The most wasted I've gotten. I was doing a show 230 00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:40,280 Speaker 4: with my best friend Maray Foston. She's so funny, she's 231 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:41,840 Speaker 4: the best. It was called the warm Up and it 232 00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:46,800 Speaker 4: was at Carme Lounge, which is hookah bar, and it 233 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:50,319 Speaker 4: was like our first show and I'm about like faux 234 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:55,920 Speaker 4: five patron shots in and it's packed. There's smoke, hot 235 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:59,079 Speaker 4: people that people are in the Christian Nubertans and it's 236 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:03,840 Speaker 4: a good time. The show is our headliner or important person. 237 00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:07,640 Speaker 4: She wan incredible. This is when Shangway had short hair. 238 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,120 Speaker 1: Yah. Early, he was just so cool. 239 00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:11,280 Speaker 4: He's so cool. 240 00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:13,240 Speaker 1: I'd even recognize him the second time I saw him. 241 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:20,400 Speaker 4: Yeah, so cool me when I tell you, it was 242 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 4: the worst intro I've ever could have possibly given anybody 243 00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:30,440 Speaker 4: in IL. I was like, and he's Asian. Slur yeah, 244 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:33,400 Speaker 4: slur stop Asian. Hang It was there was literally no 245 00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:38,559 Speaker 4: reason and I had just started. I was like new 246 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:43,439 Speaker 4: to comedy anyway. And so he gets up and he's like, okay, 247 00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:47,400 Speaker 4: like he handled it well. And then we passed the 248 00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:51,040 Speaker 4: tip bucket and we I mean they was throwing tons 249 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:53,280 Speaker 4: of money in the bucket. We pay him one hundred dollars. 250 00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:55,040 Speaker 4: He was not expecting to get no money from this 251 00:12:55,480 --> 00:12:58,560 Speaker 4: bum ass show. And he was like, yeah, help me back. 252 00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,400 Speaker 4: He would take a He'll take a little foolish intro. 253 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:02,800 Speaker 1: So he was cool. 254 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:07,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, I liked. I like message him and I said, 255 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:09,960 Speaker 4: I'm so sorry this is fucked up, but. 256 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:17,000 Speaker 5: Awful in the room was like when comedians went all right, 257 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:20,080 Speaker 5: next guys, we got a lady coming in the stage 258 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:24,440 Speaker 5: and the audience is like, I wouldn't feel weird about that, 259 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:26,559 Speaker 5: but now I do, so now she has to dig 260 00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 5: herself out of a hole. 261 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 1: I have a booger. 262 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:32,760 Speaker 4: I see, I see, I see the booger. It's coming out. 263 00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:34,720 Speaker 4: It's like I would like to be a special. 264 00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:37,040 Speaker 1: Guest that looks like a pink guy. 265 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, you're it's coming. It's coming. 266 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:39,920 Speaker 2: Well. 267 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 4: You have nice hands, and you have good nail beds. 268 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:49,760 Speaker 4: Me hitting on Eric andre in. The people know me 269 00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:51,120 Speaker 4: for my nailail beds. 270 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:54,559 Speaker 1: Nails, ladies. 271 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,040 Speaker 4: You guys don't know what a lot of things are, 272 00:13:58,120 --> 00:13:58,679 Speaker 4: and you love it. 273 00:13:58,720 --> 00:13:59,599 Speaker 3: I don't know if I love it. 274 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:01,959 Speaker 1: So sick of the anxiety. 275 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:03,080 Speaker 4: It's it's hard. 276 00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:04,840 Speaker 3: I can't take it anymore. 277 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:08,400 Speaker 4: I think it actually is the reason why I'm not 278 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,559 Speaker 4: further along in my career. The anxiety, anxiety and self 279 00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:14,640 Speaker 4: sabotage and the like. It's just too much going on. 280 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:15,800 Speaker 4: It's like when you I. 281 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:19,000 Speaker 5: Think, I think every single comedian has anxiety and depression. 282 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:24,680 Speaker 5: Name one comedian that doesn't have Name one successful comedian 283 00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:27,040 Speaker 5: that isn't riddled with anxiety or depression. 284 00:14:27,680 --> 00:14:29,240 Speaker 1: Any writer, Name a single writer. 285 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,520 Speaker 4: It's crazy. I was just on a floor Michelle Buteau. 286 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:32,400 Speaker 4: I feel like. 287 00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:35,880 Speaker 1: Michelle has horrendous anxiety. 288 00:14:36,280 --> 00:14:38,960 Speaker 4: Even if she does, I can't tell. 289 00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:40,800 Speaker 1: I say that as one of her best friends. I 290 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:44,440 Speaker 1: can't tell because we learned how to mask. 291 00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:47,880 Speaker 4: She's always loving light and like every show I've been 292 00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:50,120 Speaker 4: on with her and even just hanging out, I'm like, 293 00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:51,920 Speaker 4: she's just incredible. 294 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,080 Speaker 1: She's she's pretty bad anxiety. 295 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:54,800 Speaker 4: Damn. 296 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:57,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, it's part of your brain. It's fine. 297 00:14:57,440 --> 00:14:59,880 Speaker 1: It's like every living creature has anxiety. 298 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:05,280 Speaker 4: Being on the prescription fucking help tremendously. But I didn't 299 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:08,280 Speaker 4: have anxiety until I got sober. Didn't know that. I 300 00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 4: was probably masking it because. 301 00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:11,680 Speaker 1: You haven't when you were a little kid. 302 00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:14,840 Speaker 4: No, but I also was pretty odd as a little kid. 303 00:15:14,960 --> 00:15:15,160 Speaker 1: Yeah. 304 00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:16,920 Speaker 4: I didn't have no. 305 00:15:18,720 --> 00:15:19,320 Speaker 1: Witness. 306 00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 4: I was not Jehovah's witness. Stop it. I was not 307 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:22,760 Speaker 4: knocking on door. 308 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 1: I didn't have any birthday parties. 309 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,120 Speaker 4: I had a few, but they weren't big on that. 310 00:15:28,320 --> 00:15:29,280 Speaker 4: That wasn't there to think. 311 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:31,200 Speaker 1: Really, that's a Baptist Methodist thing. 312 00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:33,800 Speaker 4: I don't know. It was just like old school, like 313 00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:36,120 Speaker 4: we've been through it all. We don't need all of this, 314 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:40,320 Speaker 4: Like all you need is like shelter, clothes on your back, 315 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,080 Speaker 4: food in your mouth, what do. 316 00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,600 Speaker 1: You see, salt of the earth, what do you need? 317 00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:47,360 Speaker 1: Disney World and Uncle saying this, Yeah, I got to 318 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:47,840 Speaker 1: meet them. 319 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:49,680 Speaker 4: They're gone, They're in a better place. 320 00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:53,720 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, so long ago, so long. 321 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:57,680 Speaker 4: They actually they passed away while I was when I 322 00:15:57,720 --> 00:15:59,680 Speaker 4: was waitressing. 323 00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:00,000 Speaker 1: And. 324 00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:07,520 Speaker 4: I think like twenty eight twenty nine. My uncle, my 325 00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:10,720 Speaker 4: great uncle, my uncle Papa, he passed. He passed right 326 00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:12,480 Speaker 4: after college. So I was like, I don't know, like 327 00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:15,760 Speaker 4: twenty twenty two, twenty one or something like that. But 328 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:19,080 Speaker 4: I got my job as a as a waitress or whatever, 329 00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:20,920 Speaker 4: and I was making a lot of money, and me 330 00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:23,760 Speaker 4: and my mom had like had a big falling out 331 00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:26,360 Speaker 4: because I didn't finish college. So I go to his 332 00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:29,960 Speaker 4: funeral and my mother is trying to embarrass me at 333 00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:33,560 Speaker 4: his funeral, and I owed her like eight hundred dollars 334 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:36,320 Speaker 4: because of a singular remember singular. 335 00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:38,640 Speaker 1: Young, what's the difference. 336 00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,520 Speaker 4: No, she had me when she was like in her thirties, 337 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:43,240 Speaker 4: like thirty. Yeah, but she was trying to embarrass me 338 00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:45,960 Speaker 4: at the funeral, and so I pulled out eight hundred 339 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:50,760 Speaker 4: dollars like I made it rain at the funeral, and 340 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 4: I was like, here's your money, and honestly, it was 341 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:59,520 Speaker 4: highlight of my life. But then we almost fought at 342 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:03,280 Speaker 4: hometown buffet, so yeah, it was. It was very detroit 343 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:05,760 Speaker 4: of us. Your mom's intents, well, she's also in a 344 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:06,400 Speaker 4: better place now. 345 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:09,280 Speaker 1: But oh my god, I'm it's striking out. I'm sorry. 346 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:11,919 Speaker 4: No, it's okay. I'm a morbid person. So this is 347 00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:16,320 Speaker 4: another This is no, no, no, this is good. I love it. 348 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:23,879 Speaker 4: The kid asked me about another problem. All my exes did. Yeah, 349 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 4: but yeah, we didn't have like birthday parties or whatever. 350 00:17:27,119 --> 00:17:30,240 Speaker 4: So like now, growing up, it's a bigger thing to 351 00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:33,560 Speaker 4: like celebrate a birthday because we can. I think they 352 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:37,000 Speaker 4: also didn't. They couldn't spend too much money on birthdays, 353 00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,280 Speaker 4: so it wasn't a big deal for them. But now 354 00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,440 Speaker 4: it's like as an adult, it's like, yeah, let's get 355 00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,199 Speaker 4: the cake. That's like two hundred dollars, let's go. 356 00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:45,480 Speaker 1: Did you think you're ever gonna settle down and have 357 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:46,240 Speaker 1: kids and stuff? 358 00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,360 Speaker 4: Not having kids? I don't do it. 359 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:49,320 Speaker 1: You don't want to do it. 360 00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:53,199 Speaker 4: No, I think and correct me if I'm wrong. Too 361 00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:56,440 Speaker 4: many fucked up people are having kids that. 362 00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,280 Speaker 1: Is correct, but I don't think. 363 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:01,400 Speaker 4: I think you're not a fucked up person genetically. 364 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:05,520 Speaker 5: You don't want to pass it down. I think about that. 365 00:18:06,359 --> 00:18:07,920 Speaker 5: I don't want to give this to anything. 366 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I don't care. And a lot of people 367 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:12,080 Speaker 4: be like, I want to say, I want to make 368 00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:15,320 Speaker 4: a little me, because yeah, you might look the part, 369 00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:20,919 Speaker 4: but inside you are absolute staten island garbage. You should 370 00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:25,439 Speaker 4: not you should be nowhere near sperm and eggs to 371 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:26,400 Speaker 4: make anything. 372 00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:30,200 Speaker 1: But doesn't it deepen your experience on this earth? 373 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:31,119 Speaker 4: What? 374 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:34,920 Speaker 1: Having kids? Raising kids? Aren't you supposed to do it. 375 00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:37,399 Speaker 4: The more and more I get older, the more and 376 00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:40,760 Speaker 4: more I'm like, yo, there's so many lost souls out 377 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:43,960 Speaker 4: here because somebody was like, I think I should have 378 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,920 Speaker 4: a family, and I got a legacy. You can't even 379 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:50,960 Speaker 4: read out loud, what is your legacy? No, no, no, no, no, 380 00:18:50,960 --> 00:18:53,400 Speaker 4: no no no, I don't I think the people who 381 00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:56,439 Speaker 4: and I have friends who have kids, and I'm like, 382 00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:02,240 Speaker 4: oh my god, yes you were opposed to have. And 383 00:19:02,280 --> 00:19:05,240 Speaker 4: then there's other people that I'm like, absolutely not, no way. 384 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,440 Speaker 4: You should be far away. Your dick should be away 385 00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:11,320 Speaker 4: from no, take it off. You shouldn't be using it. 386 00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:14,200 Speaker 4: You should your sperm, suck it out, get a second 387 00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:17,680 Speaker 4: me take it? No, no good. You know who's really 388 00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:21,240 Speaker 4: good with that? Like I see him with his Linkston 389 00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:27,160 Speaker 4: Lynston Kerman. When I see it him and his wife, 390 00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:31,000 Speaker 4: I'm like, yes, you guy, Michelle Bijoe with her kids 391 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:34,720 Speaker 4: and her husband, I'm like yes, And it's it's some 392 00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:37,520 Speaker 4: of it is just like you know, just access people preparing, 393 00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:40,720 Speaker 4: like not just having babies on a whimb or whatever. 394 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:44,240 Speaker 4: But and then I meet people who I'm like, they 395 00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:49,240 Speaker 4: are good people, but they jeans, So I shook up. Yeah, 396 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,600 Speaker 4: they put somebody did the eight ball and just. 397 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,560 Speaker 1: You could adopt. You can adopt. 398 00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:58,160 Speaker 4: Nah, if I'm adopting, they gotta be twenty five. I'm 399 00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:01,400 Speaker 4: adopting a friend. That's all I'm doing. I want somebody grown. 400 00:20:01,520 --> 00:20:05,080 Speaker 4: Were going out, You're paying for your food. You already 401 00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,160 Speaker 4: on the way to being successful. And then I could 402 00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:09,280 Speaker 4: just clip on it. But like this is my baby, 403 00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:10,480 Speaker 4: Like I don't know. 404 00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:28,760 Speaker 3: With a recondre. With a recondre, I was a demon child. 405 00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:30,760 Speaker 3: I was a demon me too. 406 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:34,239 Speaker 4: I've burned my I burn my house down. What what 407 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,840 Speaker 4: do you mean by accident like that? 408 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,720 Speaker 1: I just like I just like Ninja Turtle Cereal. It 409 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:45,360 Speaker 1: was hyper Wow. Tell us what let's go out on this. 410 00:20:45,359 --> 00:20:48,600 Speaker 1: This is the grand finale everything. I'm not going to 411 00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:51,399 Speaker 1: use the rest of the podcast. No, no, I have 412 00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:53,120 Speaker 1: my gym burned. 413 00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:54,680 Speaker 4: Your house out of my accident. 414 00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:57,480 Speaker 1: I'm not saying it's a burbs but you are an arsonist. 415 00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:00,440 Speaker 4: I'm gonna say exactly. 416 00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 1: What happened. 417 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:06,400 Speaker 4: The thing is, is that right? Like, that's what I'm 418 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:09,160 Speaker 4: talking about when you when you have kids and you're 419 00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:11,240 Speaker 4: not like my aunt and uncles did the best that 420 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,720 Speaker 4: they could, right, But. 421 00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,320 Speaker 1: Candle or something I wish you was that What were 422 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:17,880 Speaker 1: you doing? You're playing with gasoline in the house. 423 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:24,040 Speaker 4: No, I like lit like a cigar, plastic cigar and plastics. 424 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 4: I don't know if people know, but when you when 425 00:21:26,359 --> 00:21:29,080 Speaker 4: plastic is on fire, it melts. I did not know 426 00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:32,399 Speaker 4: that as a kid. So it it went into a 427 00:21:32,600 --> 00:21:36,400 Speaker 4: like a bag of newspapers because they were hoarders. There 428 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:40,240 Speaker 4: was just like like papers from the from the Reagan era, 429 00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:45,480 Speaker 4: like like the jet magazines everywhere, like old heirlooms like 430 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:46,600 Speaker 4: chot Sky stuff that. 431 00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:48,280 Speaker 1: A fire waiting to happen. 432 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:52,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I did great in sixth grade. 433 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:52,440 Speaker 1: Today. 434 00:21:52,800 --> 00:22:00,199 Speaker 4: Yes, yep, that's what happened, and I was so it 435 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:01,520 Speaker 4: was most half of it. 436 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:03,720 Speaker 1: Half of it that it was a massive fire. 437 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:05,800 Speaker 4: It was pretty bad. Where were the news king? 438 00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:10,800 Speaker 1: Oh fuck, are you serious? So your first credit. 439 00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:19,600 Speaker 4: To the stage, Yeah, truly, truly it was comedian arsonists. 440 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:23,000 Speaker 4: I'm gonna put that in my bio now. Somebody could 441 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,320 Speaker 4: have died for sure, and they didn't. 442 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:24,960 Speaker 1: Where were they? 443 00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,080 Speaker 4: They were in the. 444 00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:29,800 Speaker 1: Back of this wild a wild life. 445 00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,639 Speaker 4: I mean the fact that I and this is a 446 00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:39,360 Speaker 4: problem I have normal I was before wait until its 447 00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:42,640 Speaker 4: tale that bitch learned from me. Okay, it is trash. 448 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:44,000 Speaker 4: I started. 449 00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:47,479 Speaker 1: You have a fucking wild life? 450 00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:50,280 Speaker 4: Yeah, it was wild. It's crazy that I divulged all 451 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:50,840 Speaker 4: this for free. 452 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:52,800 Speaker 1: Do you talk about all this on stage? 453 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,320 Speaker 4: I have a solo show called how to Start a Fire, 454 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:59,159 Speaker 4: and it's all these childhood stories and then the fire. 455 00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:01,240 Speaker 1: The wild life. 456 00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:04,280 Speaker 4: I do, I do. I admit that, But I think, 457 00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:07,119 Speaker 4: like it's cool. Yeah, I think this is cool to 458 00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:10,879 Speaker 4: talk about. Do I think I need to have a kid. No, 459 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,720 Speaker 4: I have experience for a book, for a show, for 460 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:23,760 Speaker 4: a show. I stand in solidarity sag yeah yeah forever. 461 00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:29,639 Speaker 4: But but I do have like entertainment purposes, but within 462 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:32,119 Speaker 4: you're like, damn, bitch, you've been through some ship. 463 00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:34,160 Speaker 1: Like you you've lived a thousand lives. 464 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:36,600 Speaker 4: So many Do you have your own show? Do I 465 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:37,200 Speaker 4: have my own show? 466 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:38,840 Speaker 1: What you mean you need a TV show? 467 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,160 Speaker 4: Presents? Eric Andre? 468 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:45,080 Speaker 1: Sure, whatever, He'll be the wacky next door anytime. I'll 469 00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:46,159 Speaker 1: be the super in the building. 470 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:49,879 Speaker 4: Honestly, there's something for you. There's so many things that 471 00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:50,600 Speaker 4: you can be in. 472 00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:52,840 Speaker 1: I'll be one of the guys that you burned the 473 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:53,840 Speaker 1: house down of. 474 00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:59,879 Speaker 4: No, no, how's your sleep? That's the last question, you know, 475 00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:01,600 Speaker 4: I think right now? 476 00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, hours a night, we're talking. 477 00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:07,360 Speaker 4: Right now, I am. I'm also going through a breakup. 478 00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,760 Speaker 4: So oh no, it's okay, Sorry, it's fine. 479 00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:13,000 Speaker 1: The woman I met is a woman I met the 480 00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:14,480 Speaker 1: other night at the slipper room. 481 00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:17,880 Speaker 4: No, that was get the funk out of here, that's crazy. 482 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:21,200 Speaker 4: She is my intern because she's a big. 483 00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:22,480 Speaker 1: Fan of you were dating her. 484 00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,000 Speaker 4: You that you're aird. 485 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,320 Speaker 1: When you walked up. Yeah, you were all mad awkward 486 00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:27,400 Speaker 1: when you walked up. So I was like, oh, she's 487 00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:28,040 Speaker 1: on a date. 488 00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,879 Speaker 4: That young girl, that young beige woman. 489 00:24:31,240 --> 00:24:33,800 Speaker 1: Yes, I was. I was surprised, but not surprised, and 490 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:36,080 Speaker 1: you were being awkward. So I was like, Eric, I 491 00:24:36,160 --> 00:24:37,840 Speaker 1: was like, there's something. I was like, she's on a 492 00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:40,280 Speaker 1: date and she goes worried about it because I crushed. 493 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:41,919 Speaker 1: I stung it up. 494 00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:44,440 Speaker 4: She was a fan and so I, oh, you were. 495 00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:45,960 Speaker 1: Being weird, and I was like, she's that's a first 496 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:46,679 Speaker 1: date or something. 497 00:24:46,720 --> 00:24:48,720 Speaker 4: She like loves you and I I wanted to and 498 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:49,600 Speaker 4: I went, this is what I want to. 499 00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:50,960 Speaker 1: Oh, that's her type. 500 00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,320 Speaker 4: I love my good sister, Molly. You know I'm here 501 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:55,800 Speaker 4: for you, But that is that young girl. 502 00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:58,760 Speaker 1: I don't see you. I don't see age. That's how 503 00:24:58,760 --> 00:24:59,480 Speaker 1: progressive I am. 504 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:03,560 Speaker 4: No, that's how a straight man you are. What is age? 505 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:08,840 Speaker 4: What is age? It's all about energy, No, ma'am no, sir, No, 506 00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:10,879 Speaker 4: thank you. Not my type, honey. 507 00:25:11,119 --> 00:25:13,919 Speaker 5: I thought that was your girlfriend or you guys were 508 00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,000 Speaker 5: starting to date, because you're usually very like, hey, how 509 00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:16,240 Speaker 5: are you? 510 00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:18,040 Speaker 1: But you were being like awkward. 511 00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:19,600 Speaker 4: You were like a bag. 512 00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:22,000 Speaker 1: You think I would you were, you were being here, 513 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:23,120 Speaker 1: there's something in the air. 514 00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:25,240 Speaker 4: I give toe bag energy. 515 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:29,000 Speaker 1: Something in the air that night she had awkward. You 516 00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:29,679 Speaker 1: were being awkward. 517 00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:30,639 Speaker 4: I'm not dating nobody. 518 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,199 Speaker 5: Then you crushed so but I thought that it was 519 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:35,639 Speaker 5: there was something going on. But now and then you 520 00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:37,439 Speaker 5: said break up. I was like, Oh, they were breaking up. 521 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:38,520 Speaker 5: That's what that energy was. 522 00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:43,120 Speaker 4: I can't wait to tell her. I can't wait. 523 00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:45,480 Speaker 1: She hasn't she saw what I saw. That's all I 524 00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:46,120 Speaker 1: got to say. 525 00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:47,920 Speaker 4: That she has a she had. I have to show 526 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:50,200 Speaker 4: you the picture that she has. She has, she had 527 00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,560 Speaker 4: on her wall of you. It was like that. 528 00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:54,360 Speaker 1: She didn't even act like she knew. She was like, hey, 529 00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:54,719 Speaker 1: what's up? 530 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:57,520 Speaker 4: Because I've already schooled her like, hey, when you see 531 00:25:57,520 --> 00:26:00,000 Speaker 4: somebody you don't know, you're not pressed. 532 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:02,040 Speaker 1: Oh she could have. 533 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:04,720 Speaker 4: That's fine, that's what you say. And then the kids 534 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,400 Speaker 4: get real comfortable, and then and your DMS like, hey, 535 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,240 Speaker 4: what's up. I'll no, no, no, no, no no. We're very professional, 536 00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:15,439 Speaker 4: very professional. Thank you, Molly. Okay, not my type. My 537 00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:17,320 Speaker 4: girl will kind of forever. 538 00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:22,800 Speaker 1: Okay, well, there's no judges. I didn't know I would. 539 00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:29,240 Speaker 5: There was also Jewish okay, like just an Asian. 540 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:33,840 Speaker 4: Wow, Eric, I didn't know I was going to have 541 00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:34,920 Speaker 4: this much fun. This is crazy. 542 00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: Thank you so much. I can't thank you enough. And 543 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:43,240 Speaker 1: I'm sorry you're going through some heartaches deaths. Yeah, breakups, 544 00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:44,480 Speaker 1: but I have a faith. 545 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:48,359 Speaker 4: I don't memoir when it's time to get back to 546 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:53,640 Speaker 4: the drawing board. F X Depths and Breakups by Sydney Washington. 547 00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:56,560 Speaker 5: No, you're remember I should be like, so this guy 548 00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,320 Speaker 5: is Asian. 549 00:26:58,400 --> 00:26:58,919 Speaker 1: In the corner. 550 00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,119 Speaker 4: Oh my god, love Shang. 551 00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 3: Thank you very much, Thank you with aericdre. 552 00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:09,639 Speaker 5: Hey, before you go, I want to let you know 553 00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:11,479 Speaker 5: I got a new book out that I wrote with 554 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:15,800 Speaker 5: my friend Dan Curry. It is called Dumb Ideas Behind 555 00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,159 Speaker 5: the Scenes Expose I'm making pranks and other stupid creative 556 00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:19,159 Speaker 5: endeavors and how. 557 00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:20,160 Speaker 1: You can also too. 558 00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:22,040 Speaker 5: It's out now and you can get it anywhere you 559 00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:24,440 Speaker 5: buy books or audio books. Now, here's a special clip 560 00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,280 Speaker 5: from the audio book, just for you. Years ago and 561 00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,480 Speaker 5: Eric andre Fan came up to me on a Brooklyn street. 562 00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:29,919 Speaker 5: I was getting ready to film a prank at an 563 00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:32,880 Speaker 5: auto repair place. For this specific bit, I was dressed normcore, 564 00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:35,560 Speaker 5: just a T shirt and jeans versus being a giant 565 00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:39,200 Speaker 5: human potato. For example, Hitting camera filmmaking means you have 566 00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,159 Speaker 5: a hitting crew. So when I'm about to go in 567 00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,240 Speaker 5: the kill zone and perform a prank, my crew is 568 00:27:43,280 --> 00:27:45,960 Speaker 5: completely invisible, So to this fan, I just looked like 569 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:48,600 Speaker 5: I was lurking by my car on a beautiful Tuesday afternoon. 570 00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:50,679 Speaker 5: Little did he know, I was waiting for my cameras 571 00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:52,760 Speaker 5: to get set and for my first ad to secretly 572 00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:56,359 Speaker 5: and covertly cue my entrance. My first AD walked up 573 00:27:56,400 --> 00:27:58,520 Speaker 5: with a secret nod. I said bye to the fan, 574 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,320 Speaker 5: hopped in my shitty car, rolled up to the mechanics, 575 00:28:01,359 --> 00:28:04,160 Speaker 5: started chatting him up, then started bashing the shit out 576 00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:06,679 Speaker 5: of my car with a hammer, all while asking how 577 00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:09,520 Speaker 5: much is it to fix this boom? How much is 578 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:14,359 Speaker 5: it to fix this smash? What about this bang? The 579 00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:16,320 Speaker 5: marks were shocked at what I was doing to my 580 00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:20,280 Speaker 5: mediocre automobile mid prank. On my third hammer swing, I 581 00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,679 Speaker 5: accidentally thrust in my hand through the car window and 582 00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:25,920 Speaker 5: sliced it to shreds. I was bleeding everywhere. I knew 583 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:28,359 Speaker 5: I needed stitches, but the adrenaline kept me going the 584 00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:30,119 Speaker 5: whole time this prank was going down. The fan was 585 00:28:30,119 --> 00:28:34,040 Speaker 5: in the deep background, jaw dropped shitting bricks to him. 586 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,120 Speaker 5: It just looked like I was doing this crazy, anarctic 587 00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,920 Speaker 5: violence in my private life, talking to him like a 588 00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:41,520 Speaker 5: mild man or civilian one second, then going into a 589 00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:44,120 Speaker 5: psychotic rage at an auto repair shop a minute later. 590 00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,520 Speaker 5: This guy got to live the show in real time. 591 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:50,880 Speaker 5: To him, I was really that loco year round, Like 592 00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:55,200 Speaker 5: I fucking lived it man, I walked the walk. Little 593 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:58,080 Speaker 5: does he know that I am a total suburban pussy. 594 00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:01,520 Speaker 5: I meditate journal, drink cammeal Ta and go to bed 595 00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:04,840 Speaker 5: at nine thirty pm. I'm definitely let down when fans 596 00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 5: made me. I remember living in Toronto for a few 597 00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,600 Speaker 5: months filming Man Seeking Woman. I was getting lunch waiting online, 598 00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:12,520 Speaker 5: about to order a bond Me sandwich. This kid behind 599 00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:16,120 Speaker 5: me recognized me, Holy shit, your airic andre ten decimals 600 00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:19,120 Speaker 5: too loud and it was eleven thirty am. So I 601 00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:22,400 Speaker 5: was like waw, not fully with it yet craving delicious 602 00:29:22,480 --> 00:29:25,640 Speaker 5: Vietnamese meats. The fan couldn't process while I was so 603 00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:28,880 Speaker 5: boring and doing such a mundane pedestrian task like buying 604 00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:32,600 Speaker 5: a sandwich on my Tuesday lunch break. He looked at me, confused, perplexed, 605 00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:36,480 Speaker 5: nonplus a furral brow splashed across his forehead. Then he 606 00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:39,280 Speaker 5: just started hitting me like his TV broke bat bat 607 00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:41,960 Speaker 5: bat hit me in the arm and the back, ah, 608 00:29:42,000 --> 00:29:47,400 Speaker 5: I fucking hurt. Then he screamed wow wow, an attempt 609 00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:49,680 Speaker 5: to get me to warm up. His real life Eric 610 00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:51,880 Speaker 5: Andrey Dahl was running out of batteries and needed to 611 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,320 Speaker 5: start breaking something in this restaurant quick. I stood there 612 00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:58,600 Speaker 5: nervously giggling. The confused Vietnamese women behind the counter were 613 00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:01,600 Speaker 5: just like, please pay his twelve bucks. Then my fan 614 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:04,360 Speaker 5: walked away with a frown. As I was writing this 615 00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:06,480 Speaker 5: very book you're reading, I just left a coffee shop 616 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,640 Speaker 5: in Manhattan as a fan walked by and started hovering 617 00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:10,840 Speaker 5: near me, trying to get my attention. As soon as 618 00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:12,840 Speaker 5: I looked up, he forced himself to vomit all near 619 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:15,880 Speaker 5: my new blue shoes. I closed my laptop and ran 620 00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,640 Speaker 5: into an uber. He continued vomiting and said, Eric, I 621 00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:22,080 Speaker 5: love you, barf. I've created quite a nice little version 622 00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:25,600 Speaker 5: of hell for myself. Back to the Brooklyn guy, he 623 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:27,400 Speaker 5: left before we finished the prank, so you didn't even 624 00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:30,040 Speaker 5: see us reveal the cameras or beg for release forms. 625 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:32,400 Speaker 5: I just remember him laughing and rubbing his temples as 626 00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:33,040 Speaker 5: he walked away. 627 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:34,400 Speaker 1: Random dude, if. 628 00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,400 Speaker 5: You're still out there, keep on believing I'm cuckoo, because 629 00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:40,040 Speaker 5: The truth is, I'm way more boring than you could 630 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:45,680 Speaker 5: ever imagine. Dance machine, Get a friend with a prosthetic 631 00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,080 Speaker 5: leg to join a dance competition, Fill his prosthetic leg 632 00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:50,120 Speaker 5: with blood, have him dance like a fool, and have 633 00:30:50,160 --> 00:30:52,320 Speaker 5: the leg fly off and blood pour out. Then he 634 00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:54,320 Speaker 5: should say, shit, I dance too hard. 635 00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:59,320 Speaker 3: I'll with are all right? 636 00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:01,720 Speaker 1: Listen up, we got some supposi for you. 637 00:31:01,760 --> 00:31:04,120 Speaker 5: Got a burning story that you're itching to tell about 638 00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,320 Speaker 5: when you bombed or absolutely failed in life. 639 00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:09,280 Speaker 1: Now's your chance to tell me all about it. Wabo. 640 00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:12,560 Speaker 5: I want to hear your worst, most cringe worthy what 641 00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:14,440 Speaker 5: the fuck was I thinking? 642 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:17,239 Speaker 1: What just happened? Moment? So pick up your phone and 643 00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:19,400 Speaker 1: dial seven one six bombing. 644 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 5: That's seven one six two six six twenty four sixty 645 00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:25,560 Speaker 5: four and leave me a voicemail and we might just. 646 00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:27,120 Speaker 1: Play it on a future episode. 647 00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:29,000 Speaker 5: Bombing with Eric Andre is brought to you by Will 648 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:32,240 Speaker 5: Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts. Our executive 649 00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:36,040 Speaker 5: producer is Olivia Aguilar, Our producer is Bei Wang, Our 650 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:39,240 Speaker 5: research assistant is David Carliner. Our editor and sound designers 651 00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:41,840 Speaker 5: Andy Harris, and our art is by Dylan Vanderberg. Go 652 00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:43,880 Speaker 5: rate US five stars and drop a review on your 653 00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:44,680 Speaker 5: podcast app. 654 00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:45,440 Speaker 1: A choice