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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Anny and Samantha. I want some stuff

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Speaker 1: I've never told you. Protection of iHeart radio and welcome

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Speaker 1: to an episode that was going to be a happy hour.

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Speaker 1: And then I was doing research and I was like,

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Speaker 1: what is this. This is a Monday Mini, so we

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Speaker 1: get a whole Monday mini out of it. I was

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Speaker 1: inspired because my quarantine universary is coming up, many people's

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Speaker 1: quarantin universaries coming up, and I was just thinking about

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Speaker 1: some of the instances I've been out and about lately,

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Speaker 1: and you and I have discussed this, but there's just

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Speaker 1: still something. I'm still very stressed. And it turns out

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of research behind this and we are

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Speaker 1: in alone, Samantha. I love it.

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Speaker 2: Oh but by the way, my phone just gave me

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Speaker 2: a Google alert from Google Apps telling me I was

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Speaker 2: in Orlando four years ago and that was when everything

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Speaker 2: was shutting down and things were being canceled left in

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Speaker 2: the right, and I'm like, why am I here?

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Speaker 1: Yep, I was in Canada. It is a time for us. Yes,

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Speaker 1: So I wanted to share some of this research because

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of people can relate. I bet you'll, Samantha.

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Speaker 1: You can have some thoughts about this. I will give

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Speaker 1: it a minor content warning for anxiety, anxiety around weight

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Speaker 1: gain ableism, and fat phobia. So when I was researching this,

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Speaker 1: I found a lot of articles about quote post pandemic

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Speaker 1: social anxiety. So I am trying to go out more,

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Speaker 1: and I am I am going out more, but it

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Speaker 1: makes me incredibly anxious and I feel really awkward, and

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Speaker 1: I learned that I am not alone. I've also heard

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Speaker 1: this from a lot of my friends, including some that

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Speaker 1: surprised me. I was like, oh really, And there's even

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Speaker 1: a new acronym phono fear of normal uh, And there.

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Speaker 3: Is just like antagonizing what you making.

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Speaker 1: Why I feel a little attacked by it as well.

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Speaker 1: There is actual research and data on all of this.

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Speaker 1: So from a Forbes Health study, around fifty nine percent

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Speaker 1: of respondents reported finding it harder to make relationships since

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Speaker 1: the pandemic. One of the main reasons for why that

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Speaker 1: was given was not knowing what to say or how

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Speaker 1: to interact. Reported feeling more depressed since the pandemic, which

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Speaker 1: does have an impact on physical health. A lot of

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Speaker 1: people reported being hyper aware of themselves when around other people,

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Speaker 1: which we've discussed as well. I feel like probably a

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Speaker 1: couple times a year, you and I have an episode

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Speaker 1: where we're like, we went to this party and it diday.

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Speaker 3: Go why did you do this?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Yes, And one of the things I was thinking

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Speaker 1: about was our recent trip to the office, which was

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Speaker 1: very awkward, and then I had a recent hangout where

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Speaker 1: I was like, I just felt like I was very awkward.

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Speaker 1: But some people also reported that they don't miss everything

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Speaker 1: they were doing before the pandemic and they are still

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Speaker 1: enjoying their alone time as they said. But that being said,

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Speaker 1: there is a difference between loneliness and alone time. Like loneliness,

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Speaker 1: prolonged loneliness isn't good for your health, and socializing does

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Speaker 1: have many benefits. However, that socializing works because that can

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Speaker 1: be texting, that can be it doesn't have to be

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Speaker 1: one specific thing. And again reminder, COVID has not gone away,

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Speaker 1: so a lot of people report that they still don't

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Speaker 1: feel safe and Pulluminary research indicates that contracting a severe

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Speaker 1: case of COVID may have a long lasting impact on

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Speaker 1: depressive and anxiety symptoms, so that's still there. It's also

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Speaker 1: impacted different people and different populations diferent ways. So for example,

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Speaker 1: there's I found some research studies about children and teens

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Speaker 1: and how they're dealing with that, people with financial difficulties,

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Speaker 1: people with illness, people with disabilities, people who had out

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Speaker 1: or have social anxiety disorders. They are impacted differently. Studies

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Speaker 1: show women were more impacted than men by this post

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Speaker 1: pandemic anxiety. But we've also discussed a lot of the

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Speaker 1: reasons why that might be. And it's also worth noting

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Speaker 1: that that was true pre pandemic too, so it's sort

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Speaker 1: of par for the course. Studies also found that increased

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Speaker 1: social media use during the pandemic led to increased social anxiety. Obviously,

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Speaker 1: there are a lot of factors to consider there, but

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Speaker 1: I thought that was interesting. And also, yeah, it's important

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Speaker 1: to remember that a lot of times these conversations can

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Speaker 1: be ablest nature, especially for people who again have already

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Speaker 1: had these anxieties or what have you. So just a

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Speaker 1: good reminder. So I'm just gonna run down a couple

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Speaker 1: of things that I've experienced that I found research on.

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Speaker 3: One is hugs.

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Speaker 1: I okay, so I'm not a hugger every now and then.

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Speaker 1: I do like hugging people. There are certain people I

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Speaker 1: hug more than others like my mom, for instance, but

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Speaker 1: in general, I'm good hugged you.

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Speaker 2: Have I ever rugged you?

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Speaker 1: We hugged, We hugged one time. I remember it because

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Speaker 1: I was like, we're hugging.

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Speaker 3: Because I'm also not a hugger.

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Speaker 2: I am not.

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Speaker 1: It's weird. It was after the the audio book, after

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Speaker 1: we recorded it, I hugged you. I was in a

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Speaker 1: desperate place emotion.

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Speaker 3: To experience that I forgot.

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Speaker 1: How could you? That's not like how much I don't

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Speaker 1: hug as I remember. But speaking of so, I've had

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Speaker 1: this experience twice lately within the past two weeks where

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Speaker 1: I've been like, I'm I know, hugs for me, and

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Speaker 1: then a hug has been initiated and I don't know

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Speaker 1: what to do. And one was at the office, right

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Speaker 1: and I hugged a coworker of ours because he was like,

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Speaker 1: let's hug. But then you hugged someone else, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, I'm not coming over there unless you come

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Speaker 1: over there. And then I felt bad because I'm like,

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Speaker 1: it's just because he asked me to hug. If you

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Speaker 1: don't ask me to.

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Speaker 2: Hug specifically, I don't get a hug. He said that

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Speaker 2: I was trying to remember when that was, like what

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Speaker 2: was aut the office? But yeah, because I haven't seen

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Speaker 2: her in forever, and I as much as I don't,

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Speaker 2: I'm not a touchy feely person. I do give hugs,

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Speaker 2: which is odd, but I typically read if people are

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Speaker 2: not huggers, I typically do that. Maybe I'm wrong, but like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I guess I made Joey hug me.

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Speaker 3: Hey Joey.

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Speaker 2: Uh because I had met them in New York. I

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Speaker 2: was like, heyay, like you know, it's all. I gave

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Speaker 2: them a hug. But I'm more of a side hug

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Speaker 2: person too. Yeah, unless I know you really well, I

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Speaker 2: feel like the hug.

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Speaker 1: And I was thinking about this because I was going

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Speaker 1: through all kinds of ideas about what this originally Happy

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Speaker 1: Hour which is now Monday Mini, was going to be.

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Speaker 1: I was just gonna do a whole thing on hugs,

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Speaker 1: and I was thinking about, like it's it feels to

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Speaker 1: me like it's it seems in a lot of situations

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Speaker 1: I have been men shake hands and women hug right,

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Speaker 1: or men hug women right. But it's it's so it's

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Speaker 1: almost like the natural I can when I'm feeling anxious,

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Speaker 1: like sometimes I'll go in for a hug, even though

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Speaker 1: I don't want to hug, but I'm like, I think

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Speaker 1: they want one, I guess I'll do it. So I

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Speaker 1: totally get it. Like sometimes it just sort of happens.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I did the side hug. I noticed that.

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Speaker 2: So the other day I had friends come and pick

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Speaker 2: up something that they needed to come and it's pretty giant,

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Speaker 2: and so they came with other people to help load

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Speaker 2: it up. So there was four of them, and two

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Speaker 2: of the women are really I'm really close to, Like

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Speaker 2: I see them every week twice a week typically at Zoomba,

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Speaker 2: but like we've after like ten years, you forged your

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Speaker 2: friendship and we like they came to my birthday party.

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Speaker 2: I've been to their birthday things all the things, and

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Speaker 2: we give hugs. And then there are two guys with them,

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, oh, what do I do here? Because

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Speaker 2: one of them I met for the first time, one

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Speaker 2: of them I have seen, i've known, also was part

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Speaker 2: of the class, so I gave him a side hug.

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Speaker 2: It was very obviously I gave hugs, side hug and

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Speaker 2: then the handshake to the dude that I just met

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Speaker 2: that day.

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Speaker 3: It was so like that way.

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Speaker 2: And then I'm like I'm a hand I literally said

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Speaker 2: it out loud because it was obvious that I.

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Speaker 3: Just switched to handshake just to him.

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Speaker 2: So I was like, I simply just met I'm don't

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Speaker 2: give you a handshake, and he was like, he started laughing,

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Speaker 2: like I got you, I got you. So yeah, I understand,

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Speaker 2: really really interesting, Like how do you proceed?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? And I think that's a good way, Like addressing

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Speaker 1: awkwardness can help alleviate awkwardness, make it worse.

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Speaker 3: Both things have happened, both can happen.

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Speaker 1: I do think one of the things I read when

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Speaker 1: I was researching this was people feel like they don't

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Speaker 1: know how to gracefully exit the conversation anymore. And this,

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Speaker 1: I feel like the hug for me has become I

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Speaker 1: guess we'll hug and then I know, but I feel

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Speaker 1: like the hug is getting wrapped up in this. And

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Speaker 1: I recently I hung out with your partner and a

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Speaker 1: couple of other people and you were telling me like

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Speaker 1: I left. Yeah, I was like, we've got to go

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Speaker 1: because I knew I won't be able to get out

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Speaker 1: of this conversation. I was running late. Was it awkward?

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Speaker 2: Yes?

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Speaker 1: Did I need to go? Yes?

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Speaker 2: For me?

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Speaker 3: I just leave. Well's so funny is I've become so abrupt.

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Speaker 2: I've never been good at small talk anyway. We've talked

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Speaker 2: about this previously. I want to get to know you

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Speaker 2: for having a conversation or having a conversation. I've gotten

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Speaker 2: more distracted, Like I'm more easily distracted than before, where

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Speaker 2: I'm like looking sideways to the point wh people like

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Speaker 2: if something came coming to get me. But at that point,

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Speaker 2: like if it lulls, I'm like, well, okay, I go bye,

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Speaker 2: just abruptly say bye and leave like that was awkward, okay,

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Speaker 2: And then like I because I'm on the I'm the

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Speaker 2: same way on the phone, which I don't like talking

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Speaker 2: on the phone, but like eventually we just sit in silence,

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Speaker 2: and because I don't know what else to do, like okay,

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Speaker 2: i'll talk to you later. But oftentimes as I say

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Speaker 2: out okay, I talked to you later, they started ramping

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Speaker 2: up something else, I'm like bye, and.

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Speaker 3: I hate.

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Speaker 2: Without knowing but they had just started. But I'm like,

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Speaker 2: but I just said bye, so I'm obviously gonna click off.

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Speaker 2: And that's kind of my personality now, is just abruptly

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Speaker 2: to get up and go and I find myself thinking

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Speaker 2: this is real.

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Speaker 3: Awkward.

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Speaker 1: Well, you are not the only one that is struggling

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Speaker 1: with that. I will tell you. I have found a

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Speaker 1: lot of articles about it and a lot of advice

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Speaker 1: that really cracked me up on how to deal with

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Speaker 1: It's funny, but essentially a lot of it was we

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Speaker 1: aren't used to it. It's like a social skill we

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Speaker 1: haven't been using, and now you gotta build it back

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Speaker 1: up if you want to, if you want, if you

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Speaker 1: want to. I had a similar moment with my mom.

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Speaker 1: I finally got a hold of my mom. I had

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Speaker 1: a similar moment with her on the phone where there

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Speaker 1: was a moment of silence and I was like, this

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Speaker 1: is the end of the conversation or is she waiting

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Speaker 1: to say something? Is she waiting for me to say something?

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Speaker 1: Oh my, I would say something. Else that I've experienced

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Speaker 1: in terms of what is still really hanging on to

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Speaker 1: me is habits that I formed, including things which I

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Speaker 1: discussed recently, like fan fiction, where I'm now writing fan

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Speaker 1: fiction where that has become like I have to do

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Speaker 1: this every once a week. And I was doing that

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Speaker 1: during the pandemic to get through the pandemic, but now

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Speaker 1: it's like entrenched and I don't know what to do

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Speaker 1: about it. I don't know if it's bad or good.

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Speaker 1: But it's like a new block of time has been

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Speaker 1: taken away, and so it's like, sure, I could go

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Speaker 1: outside more now, but the fan fiction, I kind of

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Speaker 1: do this. So it's that's something that I've been kind

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Speaker 1: of working on. Balancing more another thing, and I want

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Speaker 1: to come back and do a whole episode on this,

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Speaker 1: but I'm just gonna mention it. And this is where

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Speaker 1: we get into like the fat phobic part is that

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Speaker 1: I've been reading a lot of articles about because we

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Speaker 1: mentioned we were going to do an episode on this

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Speaker 1: about Oz and I was impic anxiety where it feels

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Speaker 1: like everybody and a lot of people are using this

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Speaker 1: to lose weights. And I gained weight during the pandemic,

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Speaker 1: so it feels like a sort of anxiety of like

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Speaker 1: I'm just gonna stand out even more, which is incredibly

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Speaker 1: incredibly unhealthy and fat phobic. But I feel like there

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Speaker 1: is this sort of being not comfortable with your body

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Speaker 1: after the pandemic. And I've been thinking about this in

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Speaker 1: terms of I kept telling myself, you know, you'll lose

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Speaker 1: this weight, but I bought a lot of like sweatpants

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Speaker 1: and T shirts during the pandemic, and so I need

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Speaker 1: to get rid of some clothes because I got two

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Speaker 1: weik clothes and there's there have been hanging on to

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Speaker 1: you lose this weight. You can think these again one

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Speaker 1: day and I'm like, I'm kind of having a moment

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Speaker 1: of like, I don't know, are you? So it's sort

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Speaker 1: of I do want to come back and talk about this,

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Speaker 1: just because I had so many conversations with my friends

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Speaker 1: about it, and it is impacting, as we mentioned in

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Speaker 1: a recent classics sort of the body acceptance. But that's

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Speaker 1: definitely I've been a part of why I feel I've

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Speaker 1: had more trouble going out than I used to.

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Speaker 2: I agree things to wear things, clothing because I don't

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Speaker 2: have clothes anymore because I don't fit into them because

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Speaker 2: I'm not a I've never been skinny. So that's one

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Speaker 2: of those things that I have always dealt with. I mean,

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Speaker 2: I think we've talked about this both, but like being

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Speaker 2: chubby and being told constantly you're chubby and then knowing

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Speaker 2: that impacting instead of being And I'm sad that we're

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Speaker 2: back to this because I love the generation where people

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Speaker 2: love themselves. And I feel that same way about like

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Speaker 2: I think my nieces have gotten to the point where

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Speaker 2: they understand a little more and they have a help

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Speaker 2: even though their parents come from the age gen Xers

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Speaker 2: come from the age of diet pills and supermodels on

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Speaker 2: all the things, Like gen X has a whole different

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Speaker 2: perspective to me like this this also could be a

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Speaker 2: different show, because you know, Weight Watchers was a big thing,

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Speaker 2: still is, but it was really big neutral system all

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Speaker 2: these things what was being pandered to us. Even it's

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Speaker 2: bad today, but I feel like there's at least some

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Speaker 2: rhetoric against it as where before it wasn't there at all.

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Speaker 2: And so like gen X's parents, I think have a

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Speaker 2: hard time not letting that go and not letting that

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Speaker 2: go for their family, especially in the South.

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Speaker 3: We'll put that in a different way.

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Speaker 2: But with that like feeling like my sister was size

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Speaker 2: zero in high school. I got her closes in seventh

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Speaker 2: grade and they fit. They didn't fit me, like I

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Speaker 2: could not fit into our clothes after that fact, So

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Speaker 2: so it was never a threat. She had an eating disorder,

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Speaker 2: and I don't know what that eating disorder was, but

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Speaker 2: she had enough that she would pass out because she

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Speaker 2: forgot to eat. She refused to eat, and if she

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Speaker 2: had Reese's cup, that was her meal for the day.

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Speaker 2: But with that, she kind of allowed that to dictate,

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Speaker 2: not necessarily telling her kids they're fat, but be like,

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Speaker 2: do you really you know you're kind of thick?

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Speaker 3: Do you really want to wear that?

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Speaker 2: So like shaming them, not because she doesn't want them to,

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Speaker 2: not because she's trying to make them lose weight, but

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Speaker 2: more so like body shane them so they would wear

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Speaker 2: clothes that cover us, which is what we've learned, like

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Speaker 2: in our generation, I think millennials and an exers, if

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Speaker 2: we're fat, that means we need to be covered up

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Speaker 2: from head to toe and not showing anything and that rhetoric. Yes,

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Speaker 2: this is all so fat phobic and so disturbing, and

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Speaker 2: I'm sad again that we're back to this. But this

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Speaker 2: level of like hating everything about our body. So therefore,

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Speaker 2: if it looks uncomfortable, slash makes other people uncomfortable, than

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Speaker 2: we are in the wrong and there's something wrong with us.

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Speaker 2: And with that it's hard to let go of, especially

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Speaker 2: do going out in public. So for me, I'm like

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Speaker 2: extra covered up and I'm like, yeah, definitely, I'm wearing

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Speaker 2: her sixteen layers. Is it ninety five degrees and it's

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Speaker 2: like like dying of humidity?

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Speaker 3: Yes? But am I going to keep wearing this sweater?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Because I hate my arms. Like there's so many things

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Speaker 2: like to this that is so fat phobic, and we've

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Speaker 2: learned from so much, which doesn't really make sense because

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Speaker 2: the body is the body. There's nothing really, there's nothing

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Speaker 2: that we should be ashamed about. But because we've learned

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Speaker 2: that it's so hard to let go of that. And

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Speaker 2: then the pandemic. For a minute, we were all like,

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Speaker 2: let's just be us because everything's going to hell. Let's

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Speaker 2: just finally enjoy food and you know, hang out and

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Speaker 2: not worry about these things. And then coming back out

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Speaker 2: in public where people who make money off of that system,

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Speaker 2: people who maybe uh have the money to look these ways.

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Speaker 2: Ozambic being that problem solver for some really like makes

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Speaker 2: you feel like you have to meet that centered again,

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Speaker 2: which is so so infuriating.

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Speaker 3: And everything else. I'm just rambling.

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Speaker 2: I'm just rambling now because I think, like what I

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Speaker 2: saw with my sister and then my mya nieces, whom

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Speaker 2: I love is like the change in attitude, and I

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Speaker 2: love that, and I hope it stays like that's that's

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Speaker 2: my biggest hope, because I don't want them to have

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Speaker 2: to deal with this conversation repeatedly and feeling like who

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Speaker 2: they are is something to be ashamed about. And I

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Speaker 2: feel like coming out of the pandemic for a couple

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Speaker 2: of years now. And I say this because we're not

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Speaker 2: out of the pandemic like this, like people are dying,

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Speaker 2: people are dying, people are sick. We should be coming up,

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Speaker 2: we should be masking still, but coming to this like

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Speaker 2: people are like, Okay, you've had enough time. Why aren't

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Speaker 2: you perfect? And I feel like we weigh that on ourselves,

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Speaker 2: and that's part of the reason I'm like, yeah, I

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Speaker 2: can't come out because we didn't hit that perfect stride

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Speaker 2: as we were told we should be.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I know a lot of people wrote about that too,

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Speaker 1: of like feeling the mental drain of what used to

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Speaker 1: be every day of like putting on your makeup and

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Speaker 1: putting on the clothes and like it's just too exhausting,

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Speaker 1: which is again part of the There has been research

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Speaker 1: into this and why that is. And I think we

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Speaker 1: will come back and do a whole thing because I

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Speaker 1: feel like we're in a big shift in the US

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Speaker 1: in the US with a zipech and all those things

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Speaker 1: and what's going on, So we will come back and

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Speaker 1: do it. But that is a bigger conversation for a

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Speaker 1: later day. Something else. I found a lot of people

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Speaker 1: doing that. I noticed I was doing too. It's like

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Speaker 1: basically kind of consolidating your friends, like you're kind of

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Speaker 1: it sounds terrible, but you're kind of like, well, I

359
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:14,520
Speaker 1: haven't talked to you in a while, so I guess.

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Speaker 1: But I was kind of going through this the other

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Speaker 1: day and I was thinking, I haven't seen this person

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Speaker 1: in a while, and I was like, I think I'm

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Speaker 1: good without them. Then I had a thought. I was like,

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Speaker 1: but then they won't like me anymore. And I was like,

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Speaker 1: what are you talking about? What? But that's how important

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Speaker 1: being liked is to me that I was like perfectly

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Speaker 1: fine without this relationship. But there's still a part of

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Speaker 1: me that's like, no, but.

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Speaker 2: Right, I think you've got to hit onto it in

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Speaker 2: a second. But for me, it's not that I don't

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to consolidate my friends because I kind of

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Speaker 2: already did that. Five years ago, because I'm like, you're toxic.

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Speaker 2: You're toxic, You're toxic. I just didn't know they were toxic.

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Speaker 2: I just knew they were bad for me, essentially, like

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Speaker 2: you are a taker, you are like this and this

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Speaker 2: and this, so therefore I'm yeah, I don't need you.

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Speaker 2: We're good if you call and you want to hang sure,

378
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Speaker 2: but outside of that, I'm not making the effort. So

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Speaker 2: that was because of like I feel like that's a

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Speaker 2: late mid late thirties thing that happens. You're like, yeah,

381
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Speaker 2: I don't have time for you because there's too much

382
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Speaker 2: and if you're not someone that we can be both

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Speaker 2: good for each other, then what's the point, right, And

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Speaker 2: I don't have to be friends with every damn person

385
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Speaker 2: in the world, and there are bad people, yeah, just

386
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Speaker 2: to that, But as of late, it's more than I

387
00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:41,440
Speaker 2: forget so other people have texted me or reach out,

388
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Speaker 2: and then I get tired and I'm like, yeah, i

389
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Speaker 2: think I'm gonna pair down my time and only see

390
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Speaker 2: people once every other week, so there's two people I

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Speaker 2: can see next week and then nothing.

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Speaker 3: It's just more like.

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Speaker 2: I'm tired and or forgetful, and I'm not purposely trying

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Speaker 2: to trim down my friend I love y'all.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean that makes sense too, that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: I did. Uh. I went and got dim sum with

397
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Speaker 1: my big group of friends the other day from my

398
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Speaker 1: who I grew up with, and we used to do

399
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Speaker 1: it every year before the pandemic, and it was so

400
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Speaker 1: bizarre being with them. It was lovely, it was such

401
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:26,800
Speaker 1: a great thing. But we just hadn't done that since

402
00:22:26,840 --> 00:22:29,359
Speaker 1: the pandemic. And so there are the relationships that you

403
00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:31,879
Speaker 1: can sort of you know, you don't see each other

404
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Speaker 1: all the time necessarily, and that's fine, and when you

405
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,000
Speaker 1: hang out it's still great. But then there are the

406
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Speaker 1: people that are sort of like, yeah, I guess your

407
00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:48,439
Speaker 1: relationship change and close you change, you change. Yeah, exactly.

408
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Speaker 2: Actually I made this statement to a friend of mine.

409
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Speaker 2: I was like, I think some of my friends might

410
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Speaker 2: heart my feelings and I can't be around them too

411
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Speaker 2: much because I've become more sensitive.

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Speaker 3: So I'm gonna have to I'm gonna have to watch

413
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Speaker 3: this one. Yeah.

414
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Speaker 2: So I am real sarcastic and really like you know,

415
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Speaker 2: all those things, but I've gotten less not sarcastic, but

416
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Speaker 2: more like, oh no, are you okay?

417
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Speaker 3: Like that?

418
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Speaker 2: Time of person and also like everything is oh no,

419
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Speaker 2: everything's the worst. Don't be mean to me.

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Speaker 3: Personality.

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Speaker 1: Now I have that too, and I'm like, I can't

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Speaker 1: handle this right now, cannot bring this topic up with

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Speaker 1: me right this minute later? Would I'm more emotionally still sure? Right?

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00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:37,040
Speaker 1: But yes for me? So originally I called this the

425
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Speaker 1: new isolation because I realized that I had this new

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Speaker 1: thing that I'd had developed, which was I needed one

427
00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:47,320
Speaker 1: day literally where I interact with no one except over text.

428
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Speaker 1: And apparently that is part from these research papers. If

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Speaker 1: you've been I mean I live alone, if you've been

430
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Speaker 1: inside in quarantine, it makes sense that it becomes you

431
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Speaker 1: can't just just like go back. You can't just flip

432
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,359
Speaker 1: that switch and go back to how much you were

433
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Speaker 1: doing before socially outside. So it's sort of like you know,

434
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Speaker 1: building up, touching, getting your toe in the water. But I,

435
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 1: for mine, mine is one day where I just there's

436
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:27,520
Speaker 1: nobody text, yes, but no visual. Sometimes it scares me

437
00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: because I'm worried I will chip and die in the shower.

438
00:24:30,480 --> 00:24:34,680
Speaker 1: No one will know, but eventually hopefully someone will figure

439
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:40,119
Speaker 1: it out. Also, I know we've talked about this, but

440
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:43,879
Speaker 1: COVID fog Israel, which is basically like you kind of

441
00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:49,560
Speaker 1: feel a little dazed, can't concentrate, maybe, and prolonged isolation

442
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:52,160
Speaker 1: can impact your memory and verbal recall, which is why

443
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,320
Speaker 1: for some of us who have been alone or are

444
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 1: used to having like a conversational pattern of only a

445
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: few people during lockdown, talking with someone new might feel

446
00:25:02,359 --> 00:25:04,199
Speaker 1: like you have no idea what you're saying. So I

447
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,040
Speaker 1: feel like this is me translating for your snuff. Maybe

448
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 1: we were we were picking up this an adaption during COVID.

449
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:14,640
Speaker 1: Maybe we spent.

450
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:15,160
Speaker 3: So much time.

451
00:25:15,359 --> 00:25:19,560
Speaker 2: Also, I just I think mine is both COVID fog

452
00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 2: and I'm gonn going with the perimenopause stuff that I'm like,

453
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:25,080
Speaker 2: I don't know what I was trying to say. I've

454
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:27,840
Speaker 2: lost the words completely, so I'm just gonna start doing descriptors.

455
00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,240
Speaker 2: And for a little while I was trying to correct myself,

456
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 2: I have finally given up and just look at you

457
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 2: if you're around, or just stop talking.

458
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:38,240
Speaker 3: So I'm like, I'm not fixing this.

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00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 1: That's it. But I hope that was interesting because uh,

460
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:50,680
Speaker 1: some people reported that they didn't have trouble communicating with

461
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,440
Speaker 1: people they hung out with a lot, like usually a partner,

462
00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:55,160
Speaker 1: but it was when they got outside of that group.

463
00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:58,199
Speaker 1: So it's like they had developed almost a language that

464
00:25:58,240 --> 00:25:59,120
Speaker 1: worked between.

465
00:25:58,800 --> 00:25:59,879
Speaker 3: Them, secret code.

466
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: Yeah.

467
00:26:01,240 --> 00:26:03,640
Speaker 3: So I thought that was interesting, like how children do it.

468
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then yes, if you're like me, where you

469
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:12,239
Speaker 1: still feel things like grocery shopping are overwhelming when they

470
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:15,879
Speaker 1: weren't before, because again this was impacting people before. I

471
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 1: was always dressed about grocery shopping, but it it's kind

472
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:23,080
Speaker 1: of way worse. That is also a thing that has

473
00:26:23,119 --> 00:26:28,199
Speaker 1: been studied post pandemic because apparently, as I said that,

474
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:30,399
Speaker 1: we we kind of have this like social stamina that

475
00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,399
Speaker 1: we all need to build up again again if you

476
00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:35,880
Speaker 1: want to. But it's like a muscle that we've all

477
00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:39,359
Speaker 1: kind of it's gone out of use. It needs to

478
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:42,919
Speaker 1: be built up again. I did find a lot of articles,

479
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:44,800
Speaker 1: as I said, that had advice that made me laugh.

480
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 1: It would be like tip one go outside, like okayd

481
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:53,720
Speaker 1: there was some good stuff out there, but it was

482
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:57,760
Speaker 1: also kind of like okay. But I think overall they

483
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:00,199
Speaker 1: were saying, you know that this is gonna it's not

484
00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:03,960
Speaker 1: going to go away immediately for most people. They did say,

485
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,440
Speaker 1: some people, you know, do and just find it seems

486
00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:08,639
Speaker 1: but for a lot of us, it's not just going

487
00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:11,880
Speaker 1: to go away, and it is something to like slowly

488
00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:14,960
Speaker 1: work up towards. And maybe you know that doesn't mean

489
00:27:15,400 --> 00:27:17,639
Speaker 1: work up towards what you were doing before the pandemic,

490
00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:21,400
Speaker 1: but like if you're currently having trouble, if you want

491
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 1: to do two things a week but you can't your

492
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:28,000
Speaker 1: social stamina is just too low, then you can you

493
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:32,440
Speaker 1: can build up to that. Yeah, just it's gonna take

494
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:36,320
Speaker 1: some time. It's gonna take some time, and I do

495
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,359
Speaker 1: think I've gotten better, but it is still hilarious. How

496
00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 1: many times I leave it like hanging out with somebody

497
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:47,200
Speaker 1: like wow, that was awkward. Right. Yeah, As I said,

498
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 1: this was a very quick breakdown on this, and some

499
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:56,480
Speaker 1: of these need to be bigger episodes for sure, and

500
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 1: always worth reminding that. Yeah, a lot of this conversation,

501
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:02,439
Speaker 1: when you read it or talk about it, can be

502
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:05,119
Speaker 1: very able to so to keep that in mind. But

503
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:10,400
Speaker 1: in the meantime, if you listeners have any thoughts on this,

504
00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:13,760
Speaker 1: then please let us know. You can email us at

505
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,040
Speaker 1: Stuffia mom Stuff at iHeartMedia dot com. You can find

506
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:18,200
Speaker 1: us on Twitter at mom Stuff podcast or on Instagram

507
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:20,560
Speaker 1: and TikTok at Stuff I've Never told You. We have

508
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 1: a tea public store, and we have a book you

509
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,520
Speaker 1: can get wherever you get your books. Thanks as always

510
00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:28,280
Speaker 1: to our super producer Christina, executive producer Maya, and our

511
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 1: contributor Joey.

512
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 3: Thank you.

513
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 1: Thanks to you for listening Stuff I Never Told You,

514
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 1: his production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from My Heart Radio,

515
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 1: you can check out the iet Radio Apple podcast regular

516
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:37,920
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows