WEBVTT - An Urgent Warning from Bobby Brown 0:00:00.280 --> 0:00:02.720 Hey, fam I'm Jada Pinkett Smith and this is the 0:00:02.759 --> 0:00:06.080 Red Table Pop podcast, all your favorite episodes from the 0:00:06.120 --> 0:00:10.280 Facebook watch show in audio produced by Westbrook Audio and 0:00:10.360 --> 0:00:13.320 I Heart Radio. Please don't forget to rate and review 0:00:13.680 --> 0:00:18.480 on Apple Podcasts. Bobby Brown with an urgent warning for everyone. 0:00:19.040 --> 0:00:23.279 It's my duty to remind people that he could kill you. 0:00:23.800 --> 0:00:29.320 I know that you've just lost a son. Did you 0:00:29.400 --> 0:00:32.840 know that he was struggling? I feel guilty about that 0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:36.680 when you look in that mirror. What would you say 0:00:36.760 --> 0:00:45.480 to Whitney? Now? Were there no warning signs with Bobby Christina? 0:00:48.360 --> 0:00:51.559 Thank God that I had someone like my wife to 0:00:51.760 --> 0:00:56.360 wait for me. This is going to be a deep 0:00:56.400 --> 0:00:59.360 one today. I just wanted to take the time to 0:00:59.400 --> 0:01:02.560 talk to our Table Talk family. We are bringing out 0:01:02.720 --> 0:01:06.120 Bobby Brown. His been a part of many of our 0:01:06.200 --> 0:01:09.200 lives who are very very long time and we've actually 0:01:09.200 --> 0:01:13.880 witnessed a lot of the traumas that he's had to confront. 0:01:14.280 --> 0:01:17.920 I want to approach his journey with compassion and with love. 0:01:18.760 --> 0:01:22.600 This table is about healing. So anyone who feels like 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:25.920 you're in a position that you can judge this might 0:01:26.000 --> 0:01:31.680 not be the conversation for you. Today he see Grammy winner. 0:01:31.720 --> 0:01:34.319 Bobby Brown started R and B group New Addition when 0:01:34.319 --> 0:01:39.600 he was just twelve, the bad boy of the genre. 0:01:40.600 --> 0:01:43.320 He's been labeled the villain for the last thirty years, 0:01:46.080 --> 0:01:48.800 and many blamed him for the downfall of his ex wife, 0:01:48.880 --> 0:01:53.560 beloved Icon Whitney Houston. But there's so much more to 0:01:53.640 --> 0:01:58.800 the story. His life has been plagued by trauma, an 0:01:58.880 --> 0:02:04.920 unspeakable edgedy, the loss of his daughter Bobby Christina, and 0:02:05.040 --> 0:02:08.920 death of his son Bobby Jr. Just five months ago. 0:02:09.960 --> 0:02:12.800 The cause of death for Bobby Brown Jr. The combined 0:02:12.840 --> 0:02:27.480 effects of alcohol, cocaine and fentnel. Damn. Yeah, hey, hello, 0:02:28.440 --> 0:02:33.680 it's been a long time. What are you doing. You 0:02:33.760 --> 0:02:47.720 smell so good. Welcome, Welcome, Welcome, wellomele Y, thanks for 0:02:47.800 --> 0:02:51.600 having me, Bobby, thanks for coming. The reason why we 0:02:51.639 --> 0:02:53.800 wanted to bring you to the table today is to 0:02:53.960 --> 0:02:58.120 talk about generational trauma. I believe that you have a 0:02:58.240 --> 0:03:02.320 testimony for people that can be so healing, because Bobby, 0:03:02.360 --> 0:03:05.079 you've been through so much. When we can look at 0:03:05.120 --> 0:03:08.880 certain cycles that are happening within our own lives and 0:03:08.919 --> 0:03:12.920 you can learn from other people's journeys, I know that 0:03:13.800 --> 0:03:19.000 you've just lost a son. Yeah, yeah, Bobby. Losing him 0:03:19.200 --> 0:03:23.520 was very, very unexpected, just like losing my daughter. We 0:03:23.520 --> 0:03:27.800 were just in the studio two nights before. It was 0:03:27.880 --> 0:03:32.760 something that hit me really, really hard. He was a musician, 0:03:32.960 --> 0:03:37.200 played piano, played drums. He was a great writer. He 0:03:37.280 --> 0:03:41.840 was a teacher and learner. He learned from everybody that 0:03:41.880 --> 0:03:44.760 he was around, and he taught just as much as 0:03:44.800 --> 0:03:48.960 he learned. Um. He was someone that I just I 0:03:49.000 --> 0:03:52.440 admired him as a young man and how he grew up. 0:03:52.520 --> 0:03:54.600 He just wanted to be a part of something that 0:03:54.720 --> 0:03:57.960 was going to be special. His smile, when he smiled, 0:03:58.000 --> 0:04:01.720 he just brightened up a room. Did you know that 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.600 he was struggling in regards to drugs. I did not 0:04:04.840 --> 0:04:07.520 know that. And and and let me get it make 0:04:07.560 --> 0:04:10.320 it clear. He wasn't that he wasn't a user. He 0:04:10.960 --> 0:04:15.320 would experiment with different things. It wasn't like he was 0:04:15.520 --> 0:04:20.720 dependent on drugs. Like when I was in my situation, 0:04:20.800 --> 0:04:24.520 I depended. He was a young man that tried the 0:04:24.520 --> 0:04:28.800 wrong stuff and it took him out of here. On 0:04:28.839 --> 0:04:33.640 the morning of November, Bobby Junior's girlfriend found him unresponsive 0:04:33.680 --> 0:04:41.000 on his bedroom floor in Colt nine one one. He 0:04:41.080 --> 0:04:45.120 was pronounced dead on the scene. Bobby Brown has a 0:04:45.160 --> 0:04:50.280 critical warning. Black market drugs are being secretly laced with 0:04:50.279 --> 0:04:56.560 fentanyl and killing at an alarming rate. Accidental overdoses are 0:04:56.600 --> 0:05:01.839 happening by the thousands. Just three milligrams can be fatal 0:05:02.760 --> 0:05:07.880 a hospital great painkiller used after surgery under doctor's orders only. 0:05:08.360 --> 0:05:11.360 Fentinol has become a favorite of street dealers because it's 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:16.040 cheap to make and highly addictive. Most have no idea 0:05:16.120 --> 0:05:19.880 they are taking an opioid that can kill within twenty minutes. 0:05:21.360 --> 0:05:25.960 Fentanol can be fifty times more potent than heroin and 0:05:26.000 --> 0:05:32.440 has been named the deadliest drug in America. Wow, in 0:05:32.480 --> 0:05:36.400 these kids today, they're trying different things. They're trying to 0:05:36.440 --> 0:05:39.680 get as high as they can possibly get. That's a 0:05:39.760 --> 0:05:42.960 real problem because they don't know what these drugs are 0:05:43.000 --> 0:05:47.159 being mixed with these days. Drugs is a is a game, 0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:52.000 you know, And there's been so many deaths, specifically with 0:05:52.240 --> 0:05:59.760 fent it's just skyrocketed. My generation is kind of spiraling. 0:06:00.120 --> 0:06:04.520 There's murderers out there right now that that are creating 0:06:04.560 --> 0:06:09.719 these these synthetic drugs that that are killing these kids. 0:06:10.240 --> 0:06:14.320 It's like the committing murder. Yeah, absolutely, it's homicide. You 0:06:14.320 --> 0:06:16.880 guys don't have any idea who the people were yet. 0:06:17.000 --> 0:06:20.160 The investigation is still going on. I'm keeping my fingers 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:24.080 and toes cross that find the people and get these 0:06:24.200 --> 0:06:27.479 these drugs off the street. But my babies are gone. 0:06:28.800 --> 0:06:33.680 I've been through my time, and I know that my 0:06:33.839 --> 0:06:37.240 time played a part in my son feeling he can 0:06:37.320 --> 0:06:40.840 test something, you know, and I feel guilty about that 0:06:41.000 --> 0:06:43.760 when you think about just having a child. I don't 0:06:43.760 --> 0:06:46.760 even know when I came to this realization and understanding. 0:06:46.800 --> 0:06:49.080 I'm sure that it was sometime after I got clean. 0:06:49.360 --> 0:06:53.680 Every single thing that you do, everything that you do, 0:06:53.800 --> 0:06:57.480 every decision that you make, is going to affect that 0:06:57.600 --> 0:07:01.400 human life, and I absolutely we did not consider that 0:07:01.560 --> 0:07:05.760 at seventeen years old. Definitely, Bobby Christina and Bobby Jr. 0:07:05.760 --> 0:07:10.440 They were close in age? Were they were? They close 0:07:13.440 --> 0:07:18.440 in Bobby Christina, the daughter Bobby and Whitney, lovingly named 0:07:18.480 --> 0:07:21.720 after her father, was found face down in the bathtub 0:07:22.680 --> 0:07:28.520 with drugs in her system, tragic circumstances that eerily married 0:07:28.520 --> 0:07:33.239 her mother's death three years earlier. Bobby Christina never regained 0:07:33.240 --> 0:07:39.280 consciousness and passed six months later. She was only twenty two. 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:44.760 When you think about Bobby Christina and you think about 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:51.040 her journey in regards to what she might have experienced 0:07:51.120 --> 0:07:55.200 or internalized in the context of a generational trauma, her 0:07:55.280 --> 0:07:59.400 drug addiction and losing her life because her her life 0:07:59.680 --> 0:08:06.040 mir yours and Whitney's, she saw firsthand things that we're wrong. 0:08:06.240 --> 0:08:13.680 And Bobby Christina was super intelligent, bright um not wanting 0:08:13.720 --> 0:08:17.120 to be like her mom or myself. I just think 0:08:17.160 --> 0:08:22.520 about the generational healing process. There's so much personal healing 0:08:22.560 --> 0:08:26.520 that needs to happen, breaking those cycles and moving into 0:08:26.680 --> 0:08:31.720 healthier cycle right absolutely, and it confuses it confused things, 0:08:31.760 --> 0:08:36.199 and she unfortunately was stuck in a relationship, an abusive 0:08:36.320 --> 0:08:39.880 relationship with a man that with a boy, I should 0:08:39.920 --> 0:08:45.120 say that basically controlled her to the point where her 0:08:45.120 --> 0:08:49.959 life was taking When Bobby Christina was eight years old, 0:08:50.520 --> 0:08:53.199 her mother took in a friend's son, a twelve year 0:08:53.200 --> 0:08:57.560 old boy named Nick Gordon. Bobby Christina and Nick grew 0:08:57.640 --> 0:09:01.720 up together. After Whitney stap they started dating and moved 0:09:01.720 --> 0:09:05.680 into a suburban Atlanta townhouse with two other roommates. The 0:09:05.760 --> 0:09:11.559 couple was eventually engaged. It was a toxic relationship. Nick 0:09:11.640 --> 0:09:14.440 kept multiple run ins with the law, and on the 0:09:14.559 --> 0:09:17.400 night Bobby Christina was found face down in the bathtub, 0:09:18.040 --> 0:09:21.840 one of the roommates testified she witnessed Nick kicking Bobby Christina, 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:28.000 at one point knocking out our tooth. In a judgele 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:32.760 Nick was legally responsible for Bobby Christina's death. Less than 0:09:32.800 --> 0:09:35.960 four years later, Nick Gordon, the former boyfriend of Whitney 0:09:36.000 --> 0:09:40.240 Houston's daughter Bobby Christina Brown, is dead. Nick died of 0:09:40.280 --> 0:09:46.120 a heroin overdose. So you believe that there was foul 0:09:46.160 --> 0:09:51.720 playing Bobby Christina's got it? Okay? Like that maybe he 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:56.440 drugged her? Wow? Okay? He was the only one there 0:09:56.480 --> 0:10:01.600 with both uh situations with my ex wife and with 0:10:01.640 --> 0:10:04.559 my daughter, and they both died the same way, So 0:10:05.720 --> 0:10:10.480 that he killed Whitney as well. I believe. So got it? 0:10:10.800 --> 0:10:13.760 Got it? Got it? Do you think that he provided 0:10:13.800 --> 0:10:17.680 Bobby Christina and Whitney with the drugs? How do you 0:10:17.720 --> 0:10:22.960 think that he's culpable? Yeah? I think this is my 0:10:23.040 --> 0:10:26.280 opinion of of of who I think this young man was, 0:10:27.080 --> 0:10:30.640 um being around my daughter and being around my ex wife. 0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:33.960 I think he was more so a provider of you 0:10:34.000 --> 0:10:39.520 know party. Did you ever have a chance to confront 0:10:39.559 --> 0:10:43.760 that young man. Okay, no, I didn't. In fact, before 0:10:43.880 --> 0:10:48.400 his death, I was in rehab at the time when 0:10:48.440 --> 0:10:51.920 he passed. I had planned on once I left rehab 0:10:52.679 --> 0:10:56.360 two to approach the young man, just to find out 0:10:56.400 --> 0:11:00.360 how my daughter was in the last days. But I 0:11:00.440 --> 0:11:03.640 know I never got a chance to, you know, find 0:11:03.640 --> 0:11:06.559 out from him or talk to him. Were there no 0:11:06.679 --> 0:11:10.640 warning signs that there was some domestic violence that was 0:11:10.720 --> 0:11:14.959 happening with Bobby Christina, Not for me. I wasn't told 0:11:14.960 --> 0:11:18.600 about it. Other people might have saw it, that that 0:11:18.800 --> 0:11:22.880 were around her um, but I I didn't see it, 0:11:23.880 --> 0:11:26.240 and she didn't tell me anything. How did you find out? 0:11:26.640 --> 0:11:30.800 I found out after her passing? That was the hard part. 0:11:30.840 --> 0:11:34.400 I don't know why I didn't see it. But we 0:11:34.679 --> 0:11:39.079 hadn't been spending as much time together after her mother's 0:11:39.160 --> 0:11:43.200 death as we should have as a father and given 0:11:43.240 --> 0:11:49.200 me your um point of view around Bobby Christina's death, 0:11:49.280 --> 0:11:53.040 how do you grab more with that? Lots of prayer, 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:55.880 lots of prayer, of these thoughts that go through your head. 0:11:56.600 --> 0:12:02.280 But the three four months before her passing, we had 0:12:02.400 --> 0:12:05.959 become closer and closer. I know she had plane ticket 0:12:06.000 --> 0:12:09.320 and everything ready to come stay with me. It was 0:12:09.400 --> 0:12:15.520 just um matter of two days before. She would have 0:12:15.559 --> 0:12:19.240 been on the flight, two days before this all happened. 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:24.120 If I could just get those two days back, you know, 0:12:25.559 --> 0:12:27.720 she's still be here because I would have found out 0:12:27.800 --> 0:12:31.640 what was going on to do something about it. It 0:12:31.760 --> 0:12:34.839 was rough, and it still is rough. I think about 0:12:34.840 --> 0:12:38.360 it every day. I'm filled with um how don't want 0:12:38.360 --> 0:12:43.439 to say it like it's it's pushed out. I'm keeping 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:47.040 it away from me as much as possible because I 0:12:47.040 --> 0:12:50.800 couldn't do nothing then, and I can't do anything. It 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:54.240 just doesn't make sense to hold on. We really beat 0:12:54.280 --> 0:12:57.440 ourselves up. It's like self punishment. It's one of the 0:12:57.480 --> 0:13:00.960 biggest parts of the healing process is that we do 0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:05.319 the best that we can, all right, and recognizing your powerlessness. Yeah, 0:13:05.520 --> 0:13:08.840 you can sit in question and question questions. In my 0:13:08.960 --> 0:13:12.480 own journey and my own therapy sessions and even going 0:13:12.559 --> 0:13:16.480 through the steps, you know, trying to figure out the 0:13:16.559 --> 0:13:20.400 why of everything, that's the hard part. It's really hard. 0:13:20.440 --> 0:13:23.360 And sometimes I just couldn't always get to the answer, 0:13:23.720 --> 0:13:26.520 Like I can't always get to the answer. And I 0:13:26.679 --> 0:13:29.640 realized that at the end of the day, it's really 0:13:29.679 --> 0:13:32.520 not that important. It is what it is, man, what 0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:35.319 are you going to do about it? Starting Baby Christina's 0:13:35.320 --> 0:13:39.000 Serenity House for us was essential to the process because 0:13:39.400 --> 0:13:42.800 domestic violence it's like a hush hush thing. People need 0:13:42.840 --> 0:13:46.000 to start speaking up if they see someone in a 0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:50.400 situation like that, help them. All it takes is one 0:13:50.440 --> 0:13:54.320 phone call, find the counseling that they need. Um, and 0:13:54.360 --> 0:13:57.560 we try to help as much as possible. You in 0:13:57.679 --> 0:14:02.640 Whitney had an abuse of volatile relationship. The violence that 0:14:02.720 --> 0:14:09.439 we we occurred was using you know, that's violence in itself. Absolutely, 0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:16.640 that's abuse. We abuse drugs and alcohol. We fought hard verbally, Yeah, 0:14:17.880 --> 0:14:22.080 and we loved even harder. Yeah. And the volatility that 0:14:22.160 --> 0:14:25.840 we witnessed on on particularly on the show that you 0:14:25.880 --> 0:14:29.480 Guys had, Yeah, and the idea that if you're dealing 0:14:29.520 --> 0:14:37.960 with addiction, that's it. Verbally it gets really really messy. Yeah. 0:14:38.040 --> 0:14:41.200 Our love was strong for each other. We showed it 0:14:41.240 --> 0:14:44.560 to each other time and time again, over and over. 0:14:44.880 --> 0:14:48.160 We just got caught up in that had nothing to 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:51.000 do with how we felt about each other. The love 0:14:51.080 --> 0:14:54.880 was always there. Um. We tried so hard. We struggled 0:14:54.920 --> 0:14:58.800 really hard as a couple to get cleaned for ourselves. 0:14:59.080 --> 0:15:02.400 I got clean a long time before she did. We 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:06.280 were already divorced. She was a strong woman. She was 0:15:06.320 --> 0:15:09.560 fighting really hard to save her own life. I had 0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:13.040 strength enough for myself at that time, being an addict, 0:15:13.080 --> 0:15:16.240 I had to save myself in order to be able 0:15:16.280 --> 0:15:19.560 to save someone else. I had to save myself first. Absolutely. 0:15:19.720 --> 0:15:23.080 Unfortunately we grew apart while I was trying to find myself. 0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:26.040 In regards to the stories that we hear, one of 0:15:26.080 --> 0:15:29.400 the biggest is that you were the person that introduced 0:15:29.480 --> 0:15:33.360 narcotics to her. All those years everybody thought it was you. 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:38.800 After years of intense speculation that Bobby brought drugs into 0:15:38.800 --> 0:15:45.280 Whitney's life. In our brother Michael confessed, So here's the 0:15:45.280 --> 0:15:50.320 big question, did you introduce her to drugs? Yeah? For 0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:52.360 so many years people about Bobby Brown was the one 0:15:52.400 --> 0:15:55.000 who introduced to drugs, but she was already doing drugs 0:15:55.040 --> 0:15:58.440 by the time she met Bobby Brown. In this book, 0:15:58.840 --> 0:16:01.160 Bobby revealed that the first time he saw Whitney and 0:16:01.240 --> 0:16:06.760 just cocaine, who was on their wedding day. I don't 0:16:06.760 --> 0:16:08.560 look at point in the finger. You know, we get 0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:12.920 it together, you know, and it's not that I started 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:16.800 her or she started me. Drugs is Drugs is a 0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:19.400 bad thing. You get caught up in it. Once you're 0:16:19.400 --> 0:16:21.720 caught up in it, you know there's no stopping there 0:16:21.760 --> 0:16:25.880 is because mostually you are attracted to that energy. Yeah, 0:16:26.240 --> 0:16:29.840 and that energy, it starts to take over the relationship. 0:16:30.000 --> 0:16:33.160 It starts to take over who you are as people. 0:16:34.000 --> 0:16:37.080 And that's what happened between us. When you look in 0:16:37.280 --> 0:16:41.560 that mirror that reflects back, what do you think that 0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:50.880 Bobby would say to Whitney? Now, she's definitely missed um 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:53.880 in my heart and you know, in my spirit she 0:16:54.040 --> 0:16:56.440 was my friend. She was the mother of my child. 0:16:57.040 --> 0:17:00.000 One of the greatest entertainers that I've ever met, greatest 0:17:00.040 --> 0:17:02.800 saying as the drawing of the greatest voices the world 0:17:02.840 --> 0:17:07.360 has ever been witness too. For sure, I this one 0:17:07.480 --> 0:17:12.040 is so good. I know for what it all meant. 0:17:12.520 --> 0:17:15.399 God has a plan that you know, I can't question. 0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:19.840 It was already written in the book. So how long 0:17:19.840 --> 0:17:23.600 have you been clean? I've been clean nineteen years from narcotics, 0:17:24.480 --> 0:17:31.080 going on a year from alcohol. I caught myself in time. 0:17:31.280 --> 0:17:33.160 I look at it, as you know, I can't get 0:17:33.200 --> 0:17:36.520 no worse than I was because I know my bottom. 0:17:36.800 --> 0:17:40.240 I want to know exactly what was your rock bottom, 0:17:40.280 --> 0:17:44.399 what finally got you off of drugs? Prison? Going to 0:17:44.480 --> 0:17:48.320 jail is what got me totally cleaned off of narcotics. 0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:52.280 That was something that I've never thought I would spend 0:17:52.440 --> 0:17:54.560 a day in jail, and I went to jail for 0:17:54.760 --> 0:17:59.440 d y. How much time to you? Sixty days? Yeah, whoa, 0:18:00.040 --> 0:18:06.359 that's enough time? Sounds like an eternity. It is. I 0:18:07.200 --> 0:18:10.760 felt like an internity without narcotics. The first twenty days. 0:18:10.880 --> 0:18:15.960 It was just it was hell and you were locked 0:18:16.040 --> 0:18:19.640 up so you had to. And when I got out, 0:18:19.680 --> 0:18:23.119 it was just like damn. I was glad that I 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:25.479 was thankful that they put me in jail. I was 0:18:25.520 --> 0:18:29.639 seeing everything for the first time again. Everything looked beautiful. 0:18:30.000 --> 0:18:34.040 What made you decide to get totally clean from all 0:18:34.080 --> 0:18:36.520 mine and mood altering chemicals? Because you said you stopped 0:18:36.560 --> 0:18:40.920 drinking as well. With alcohol, I started losing bodily function. 0:18:41.200 --> 0:18:45.720 My body started shutting down because I was drinking that much. 0:18:46.040 --> 0:18:50.879 My body just was giving out on me. Even with alcohol. 0:18:50.960 --> 0:18:53.320 I got to a point where I needed it. I 0:18:53.359 --> 0:18:57.480 wasn't getting drunk anymore. I wasn't getting a little tipsy anymore. 0:18:58.000 --> 0:19:01.280 I needed it to wake up, needed it to stop 0:19:01.320 --> 0:19:05.639 the shakes, to function on a daily day basis. For me, 0:19:05.680 --> 0:19:09.080 it wasn't recreational. It was and yet it had to 0:19:09.119 --> 0:19:11.520 do it. And then my wife was telling me, you 0:19:11.560 --> 0:19:14.160 need to go do something. My kids was looking at 0:19:14.200 --> 0:19:17.840 me strange when they see their father losing, you know, 0:19:18.359 --> 0:19:21.440 bodily function in front of them. And I'm a grown man, 0:19:21.640 --> 0:19:26.400 and you know, that was something I couldn't accept for myself. 0:19:26.560 --> 0:19:30.720 I couldn't accept going to the bathroom myself. I couldn't 0:19:30.760 --> 0:19:33.520 accept that. And I said to myself, no, I have 0:19:33.640 --> 0:19:36.920 to stop this. So I got to get better. You're 0:19:36.960 --> 0:19:41.119 talking about being clean, What was your process, because you know, 0:19:41.240 --> 0:19:44.800 the recovery process is so much more than just not using. 0:19:45.040 --> 0:19:47.679 And in my recovery process and now I'm thirty years in, 0:19:47.800 --> 0:19:50.639 I have thirty years cleaning. I believe in the twelfth 0:19:50.680 --> 0:19:55.040 Step program program is what I believe in. Also, I 0:19:55.040 --> 0:19:57.600 didn't love that. I go day by day. I stick 0:19:57.640 --> 0:19:59.400 to it because that's the only way I'm gonna live. 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:04.000 Way I'm gonna maintain my sobriety. And that's important to me. 0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:07.000 That's more important to me than anything else. What coping 0:20:07.040 --> 0:20:11.000 mechanisms do you use now to deal with your grieving process? 0:20:11.040 --> 0:20:13.919 For me, I don't care what the emotion was. I 0:20:14.040 --> 0:20:18.600 celebrated with getting high, right, whether I was happy, said 0:20:19.400 --> 0:20:23.040 I go to sleep now, I don't pass out. You know, 0:20:23.320 --> 0:20:25.760 I wake up in the morning and hit my knees. 0:20:25.800 --> 0:20:30.919 I don't roll out of bed. Um. So my whole being, 0:20:31.080 --> 0:20:35.760 my whole feeling about life has changed. You know. Seeing 0:20:36.200 --> 0:20:38.879 my four year old, my five year old wake up 0:20:38.920 --> 0:20:41.920 in the morning and immediately come to wake me up. 0:20:42.040 --> 0:20:46.000 That lets me know that someone small like depends on me. 0:20:46.200 --> 0:20:48.600 When you think about the little ones and you think 0:20:48.640 --> 0:20:54.080 about your father journey with Bobby Christina, with Bobby Jr. 0:20:55.200 --> 0:21:01.439 What are you changing my lifestyle? Right? My way, my 0:21:01.600 --> 0:21:05.640 ways of living. I can only teach by example. And 0:21:05.720 --> 0:21:08.720 that was the one thing that I saw growing up 0:21:08.760 --> 0:21:12.560 in my household. I saw drug use. I saw robbery, 0:21:12.640 --> 0:21:15.840 death and killings and things like that. I thought it 0:21:15.920 --> 0:21:19.000 was cool to be smoker joint and drink a pine 0:21:19.040 --> 0:21:21.960 of Hennessy and feel good at that time because that's 0:21:21.960 --> 0:21:24.960 what I saw. That's all that I saw. But realizing 0:21:25.040 --> 0:21:28.560 it was a generational disease that my father had, my 0:21:28.680 --> 0:21:31.879 father was an alcoholic, my mom was an alcoholic. It 0:21:32.000 --> 0:21:34.840 was just passed down. And I realized that with my 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:37.840 younger children that if I don't break this psycho who is, 0:21:38.160 --> 0:21:41.040 I have to give him the reason to live clean. 0:21:42.480 --> 0:21:45.120 If I'm not right, nothing else is gonna go right, 0:21:45.200 --> 0:21:47.640 got it. You can't heal anybody else if you can't 0:21:47.640 --> 0:21:51.919 heal yourself. That's right. And break those generational cycles right, 0:21:52.480 --> 0:21:55.159 cut them ties. Now. I think I've said this to 0:21:55.200 --> 0:21:57.760 you one time that I was like, you know, y'all 0:21:57.760 --> 0:21:59.400 tell me to do a lot of stuff, but I'm 0:21:59.440 --> 0:22:02.960 sitting here doing what you do what you tell me. Yeah, 0:22:03.560 --> 0:22:08.080 your kids do not you say exactly? Yeah, what is 0:22:08.119 --> 0:22:11.960 your relationship like now with your other adult children? That's 0:22:12.040 --> 0:22:14.800 my life. Those are my life. Landing in La Princeia, 0:22:14.960 --> 0:22:17.919 they are my rocks. They talked me down off the ledge. 0:22:19.119 --> 0:22:22.120 I'm very proud of my older children. They're a lot 0:22:22.160 --> 0:22:25.320 smarter than I was at their age. Landing made me 0:22:25.320 --> 0:22:33.199 a grandfather, so grandfather, yes twice over. You have a 0:22:33.359 --> 0:22:48.480 grand grand granddaughters, granddaughters. Pop. I love that I got second, third, 0:22:48.520 --> 0:22:52.440 and fourth chances at life and I'm still here. There's 0:22:52.480 --> 0:22:55.760 something that God wants me to do. I just ain't 0:22:55.760 --> 0:22:58.080 done it yet. I'm just waiting to do it. You know, 0:22:58.160 --> 0:23:02.320 this is I mean, we've had a couple of interactions, 0:23:02.359 --> 0:23:06.000 but I haven't seen you many many, many years. But 0:23:06.200 --> 0:23:09.920 I'd have to say this is like no pun intended, 0:23:10.119 --> 0:23:17.560 but this is the most sober like you are conversation itself. 0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:21.760 There's definitely a lot of lessons. Tell me the greatest 0:23:22.080 --> 0:23:26.800 asset that your wife, Alicia has been for you. She 0:23:26.960 --> 0:23:31.119 was a friend before we became lovers. That's what I 0:23:31.200 --> 0:23:33.760 really love about our relationship. You guys have been married 0:23:33.760 --> 0:23:37.160 for what ten years? Just about just about ten years, 0:23:37.320 --> 0:23:40.480 so she's seen it all. She seen the whole bunch. 0:23:40.560 --> 0:23:44.160 She gives me the energy to want to live right, 0:23:44.600 --> 0:23:48.160 to live righteous. That's what a good woman does. Yes, 0:23:48.720 --> 0:23:52.560 it is that must commend good women holding on to 0:23:52.720 --> 0:23:56.720 us knucklehead men and not giving up on us. And 0:23:56.800 --> 0:23:59.480 I think she helped me see the good in me 0:23:59.680 --> 0:24:04.200 that I forgot about. All I thought about was everything 0:24:04.240 --> 0:24:06.720 that I had done in my past. And you know, 0:24:06.800 --> 0:24:09.040 if I kept living in it, if I kept living 0:24:09.080 --> 0:24:12.359 in the past about what I had done, you know, 0:24:12.400 --> 0:24:16.600 in my previous relationships, I couldn't see the sunshine from 0:24:16.600 --> 0:24:20.560 from where I was standing. Now I'm able to deal 0:24:20.640 --> 0:24:25.360 with everything that I had in my past and look 0:24:25.480 --> 0:24:28.680 forward to the future knowing that I have somebody standing 0:24:28.720 --> 0:24:33.400 strong and no matter what, she's there. Bobby and Alicia's 0:24:33.440 --> 0:24:37.240 relationship goes back decades. They met when she was a 0:24:37.240 --> 0:24:39.960 seventeen year old dancer when he was a twenty two 0:24:40.040 --> 0:24:44.359 year old star of New Addition. Friendship flourished, and Alicia 0:24:44.480 --> 0:24:49.840 even attended Bobby and Whitney's weddings. Over the years, they 0:24:49.920 --> 0:24:54.680 drifted apart, but in two thousand and seven, they reconnected, 0:24:55.359 --> 0:25:02.040 fell in love, and began building a beautiful family together. Welcome, 0:25:03.400 --> 0:25:08.800 Thank you for having me. Hi, how are you? That's 0:25:08.800 --> 0:25:12.600 that right of dad love right there with you being 0:25:13.160 --> 0:25:19.639 by his side through the loss of Bobby, Christina, Bobby Jr. 0:25:20.080 --> 0:25:28.719 And even Whitney Mom. Dad, Whitney, Yes, it is what 0:25:28.960 --> 0:25:31.520 has been the thing that you have wanted to offer 0:25:31.880 --> 0:25:38.119 to him, unconditional love, but really a reality check. He 0:25:38.240 --> 0:25:42.440 had a lot of yes people got it. You would go, 0:25:42.640 --> 0:25:48.040 I'm not that one, you know. I'm very direct when 0:25:48.400 --> 0:25:52.119 something is out of place and definitely red flags. I 0:25:52.240 --> 0:25:54.720 just want to be transparent and honest with him. Were 0:25:54.720 --> 0:25:59.600 you close to Bobby Jr? Yes? Absolutely, God is such 0:25:59.640 --> 0:26:06.679 a amazing human And yeah, it we're just at a loss. 0:26:06.720 --> 0:26:09.359 I think I'm still in shock. It's very new. It's 0:26:09.440 --> 0:26:12.440 terrible to say we've been here before because it never 0:26:15.240 --> 0:26:19.520 feels the same. It just feels like more. Right. He 0:26:19.760 --> 0:26:22.959 was such a big part of our lives, such a 0:26:22.960 --> 0:26:26.840 big brother, you know, such a big person in our world. 0:26:27.000 --> 0:26:30.880 And he was a very kind individual. Did not like 0:26:31.119 --> 0:26:36.680 any drama or anyone to be upset, specifically his mom 0:26:36.760 --> 0:26:40.119 or his father. Just loving and kind, and his spirit 0:26:40.280 --> 0:26:44.719 was just calm and peaceful. What about the kids losing 0:26:44.720 --> 0:26:50.480 their big brothers. It's been rough for my my my 0:26:50.800 --> 0:26:55.120 youngest son. Yes, Cash, this is that's all He talks 0:26:55.160 --> 0:27:00.320 about his brother, my brother and my brother, my brother eleven. Yeah, 0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:06.639 and that was his video gaming partner, his h his everything, 0:27:06.760 --> 0:27:10.080 you know, his dance teacher, his vocal coach. We just 0:27:10.160 --> 0:27:13.840 had a great conversation with Cash this recently because obviously 0:27:13.880 --> 0:27:16.320 with the news coming out of what was found in 0:27:16.400 --> 0:27:19.640 his system, it was high anxiety for me, Bobby too. 0:27:19.720 --> 0:27:22.679 So we talked to our therapists. How do we explain this? 0:27:23.280 --> 0:27:25.800 I want him to hear it from us, and with 0:27:25.960 --> 0:27:28.560 the tools that they gave us, we sat down and 0:27:28.800 --> 0:27:33.879 we spoke honest, truthfully, what was found, how he did it? 0:27:34.400 --> 0:27:37.840 We first asked what he thought. You know, terrifying for 0:27:37.880 --> 0:27:39.720 a kid to think that maybe my brother went to 0:27:39.720 --> 0:27:41.959 sleep and wake up. You know, you don't want them 0:27:42.000 --> 0:27:45.119 to sit with that, right because that could happen anyone 0:27:46.119 --> 0:27:48.080 go to sleep. Talking about what was found in his 0:27:48.119 --> 0:27:50.679 system and how it got in his system, and his 0:27:50.800 --> 0:27:54.320 questions were just right on, like did someone put that 0:27:54.400 --> 0:27:57.680 in him? Did he put it in himself? Did he 0:27:57.840 --> 0:28:01.360 know that was what was going to happen? And as 0:28:01.400 --> 0:28:05.960 soon as we just had the conversation, he was like 0:28:06.520 --> 0:28:10.119