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Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am

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Speaker 1: Sniki Glaser Podcast. Welcome to the show. I am um

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Speaker 1: coming to you from Los Angeles, California. Noah is here,

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Speaker 1: Anya's here. I'm in LA for a little bit. I'm

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Speaker 1: shooting a reality show that people know and love tomorrow

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Speaker 1: an episode of that. I'm like going a guest star

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Speaker 1: on it. Um. I'll give you details when I can

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Speaker 1: talk about it, but it's very fun. Um. I'm kind

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Speaker 1: of wondering, like, do I if I get hair and

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Speaker 1: makeup done? It's seven hundred fifty dollars for a makeup person,

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Speaker 1: five hundred five hundred for a hair person. I'm not

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Speaker 1: getting paid because I'm thinking I'm getting paid like maybe

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Speaker 1: exactly that to do the show. Do I just wing

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Speaker 1: it and do it myself? Because I think I can.

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Speaker 1: But it's like a Netflix show, this reality show. Everyone

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Speaker 1: on the show is really pretty and looks like so beautiful.

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Speaker 1: So part of me is like I should have it

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Speaker 1: professionally done, but I also yeah, so only because I

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Speaker 1: have access to your calendar and I know what show

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Speaker 1: it is. I feel like there's a lot of makeup

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Speaker 1: on it, and I like the way you do wild

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Speaker 1: makeup ye drag race target Yeah, yeah, it's not drag race.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't, but it's it's a show. Um yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: probably just as much. Um. Yeah, it's very glam Probably

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Speaker 1: get someone. Um yeah, treat myself. Okay, treat the show

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Speaker 1: really because I'm paying to do the show. Then this

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Speaker 1: is what that is. But you know what, this is

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Speaker 1: what you do in this biz. Um, and it'll be fun. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to look like the ragamuffin of the group.

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Speaker 1: And it's fun too. It's like this is part of

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Speaker 1: what's fun about being famous and rich as you get

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Speaker 1: to spend money on looking good and but seven hundred

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Speaker 1: fifty dollars for someone to do your makeup that washes

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Speaker 1: off that night. Yes, but you're on a reality show.

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Speaker 1: I think this is your challenge for this year is

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Speaker 1: really leaning into accepting yourself. You know your mantra, what

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Speaker 1: is it? I love and accept myself? Um, I approve

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Speaker 1: of myself. I approve of myself. I mean that would

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Speaker 1: be I don't need to wear makeup on this show

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Speaker 1: because I'm beautiful the way I am. I am going

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Speaker 1: myself spending money on a makeup artist. Yeah, it's but

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Speaker 1: it's tricky because it's I do think it's a listen.

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Speaker 1: They have to charge that much because these makeup artists

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Speaker 1: have agents who take a big cut, like everyone's getting

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Speaker 1: a piece like it, and my friend who does my

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Speaker 1: makeup deserves that much money. But sometimes I like to

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Speaker 1: get a little wet and wild and maybe yeah, I

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Speaker 1: get into my own stuff and I go like, I

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Speaker 1: did my makeup this weekend for this UM the rock

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Speaker 1: show I did with Sammy Hagar, Alice Cooper, Rick Springfield,

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Speaker 1: Kevin Croton from Mario Speedwagon, Sam Moore McDonald, John Mayer, UM.

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Speaker 1: But I did my makeup for that event and I

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Speaker 1: walked in and some girl was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: you look amazing, because I went to rehearsal and I

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Speaker 1: looked like hell. And then everyone I came back and

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Speaker 1: everyone's like, whoa, you clean up and I'll get to

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Speaker 1: just put on a tiny dress and kneehigh boots and

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Speaker 1: people go like, oh my god. But this girl was

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Speaker 1: like you did that. She was like you're good. So

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Speaker 1: my only problem is I still suffer with lashes. My

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Speaker 1: lashes like because if the glue gets a little like

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Speaker 1: if the lash pulls a little bit like it lands

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Speaker 1: on a way it can pull it. It's so strong

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Speaker 1: it can pull your eyelid to like look a little

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Speaker 1: like more open than the other one. Is that okay?

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Speaker 1: So sometimes like I that's not even funny because you're

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Speaker 1: so on the money. I was doing it this weekend.

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Speaker 1: I go, I should come up with a type of

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Speaker 1: eyelid glue for if you want to make a part

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Speaker 1: of your eyeball bigger to show more eye because people

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Speaker 1: always trying to show more eyeball or less eyeball, like

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Speaker 1: it's all about and makeup gives you a u of Oh,

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Speaker 1: I want makeup that makes my eyes look bigger. I

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Speaker 1: want makeup that makes like eyeshadow always makes me look

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Speaker 1: older I feel. And so now I'm getting off the

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Speaker 1: eyeshadow train. But it was such a big deal forever,

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Speaker 1: Like you can't not wear eyeshadow. I should have just

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Speaker 1: like a lash person that you can bring him, like

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Speaker 1: you like a Nascar where they just bring somebody in

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Speaker 1: at the end. Just yeah, might show up and go

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Speaker 1: I might just talk to my producer friend, who is

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Speaker 1: the reason I'm doing this show, and say, can I

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Speaker 1: just like borrow your lady's makeup? Girl for a touch up,

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Speaker 1: because that's what you do. You set the foundation and

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Speaker 1: then you go for a touch up, and then when

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Speaker 1: you get there, they really just do your whole face over.

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Speaker 1: And like, here's what you do. Pay for though, because

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Speaker 1: you do perfect professional makeup already, because you've been doing

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Speaker 1: it for years, you know how to do it. Do

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Speaker 1: a hair person just higher because the hair is the

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Speaker 1: hair is the key part. You're right, You're not wrong

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Speaker 1: because you don't want to be like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: look at all my flyaways ahead and I go to

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Speaker 1: dry bar down the street because my hair is pretty

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Speaker 1: simple to do, like it, I like a blowout, like

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Speaker 1: a soft curl. I do it myself, and it's not

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Speaker 1: as good as when they do it, but like I

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Speaker 1: feel like a dry bar person could do it instead

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Speaker 1: of paying five hundred dollars. No offense to Christina, who

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Speaker 1: I love, who does my hair. I just don't feel

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Speaker 1: like spending money when I'm not making any I'm tired

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Speaker 1: of it. Even though this weekend was amazing. It was

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Speaker 1: a charity show, like and I got flown out and

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Speaker 1: I got put up very nice things. It's been like

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Speaker 1: I made some passive income. I'm listen to me becoming

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Speaker 1: like a greedy person. I'm like, I want to make

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Speaker 1: money when I'm not doing anything, Like I look at

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Speaker 1: my schedule. I go unless I'm doing something, I'm not

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Speaker 1: making money. And I want some of that that pi

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Speaker 1: that people got. I I saw there in Vegas this weekend.

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Speaker 1: I became obsessed with this pizza place called Piology where

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Speaker 1: it's like chipotleate for pizza, you like, pick the topics

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Speaker 1: you want. And I was obsessed with it. I told Chris,

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Speaker 1: I was like, I want to, you know, study marine piology.

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Speaker 1: I want to go back to school. I want to

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Speaker 1: work with putting seaweed on pizza. Like we were. I was.

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Speaker 1: It was really funny all weekend, Like I would just

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Speaker 1: like slowly start walking over to pile Alogy, or we

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Speaker 1: would be walking by it and I would just stop

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Speaker 1: and stare at it and just go like and like

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Speaker 1: get like tears in my eyes. And we were joking

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Speaker 1: on weekend because and I was like, I want to

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Speaker 1: open a franchise of Piology. And he was like, that's

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Speaker 1: a way to make some passive income. So what's your

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Speaker 1: favorite dish? They're just scraping stuff off the top, No,

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Speaker 1: I ate the whole thing, because they like tell you

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Speaker 1: how many calories and like what is inside the crust.

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Speaker 1: So you pick a crust, and you can pick like

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Speaker 1: a gluten free one, vegan, cauliflower regular, and then but

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Speaker 1: they give you like the countdown of like what you're

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Speaker 1: going to get in a crust. And so as long

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Speaker 1: as I know it's in a crust, I'm down to

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Speaker 1: eat the crust, even though I love eating the toppings

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Speaker 1: off a pizza and I will never not do that.

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Speaker 1: And I think it's a totally normal way if you're

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Speaker 1: avoiding carbs to do that extra sauce. Art chokes peppers,

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Speaker 1: but they were putting too much when you make a

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Speaker 1: veggie pizza and you don't have a lot of cheese,

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Speaker 1: and like I think things can't be wet, so like

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Speaker 1: roast of peppers are always in that gooey wet stuff.

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Speaker 1: So I if I trained at my piology, I was

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Speaker 1: training them to like sive out the water and make

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Speaker 1: them dryer. And then mushrooms red peppers um, which I

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Speaker 1: found out in Australia they call it capsicum, so red

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Speaker 1: capsicum um, which I love the word capsicum so much

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Speaker 1: more than pepper. And then um, I would do the spinach,

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Speaker 1: vegan cheese, and banana peppers. What else did I like?

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Speaker 1: But I would add broccoli to our venue. I would

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Speaker 1: add a cauliflower. I would add like more eggplant stuff.

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Speaker 1: But that was my order this weekend. It was so

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Speaker 1: freaking good. Umerus caps it comes. Yes. I don't want

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Speaker 1: them to be cuciferous though, is that the word? I

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Speaker 1: don't want them to beat with cerus or just cauliflower

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Speaker 1: and broccoli, right anything? Farty? Oh you want to talk

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Speaker 1: about farty? I got fucking prescribed these. They're called fontest

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Speaker 1: Oh god, they are dry dry mouth laws lozenges. And

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Speaker 1: it looks like it's a fartest, but it's fonteste fo

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Speaker 1: n t us and therefore just like wetting your like

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Speaker 1: keeping your mouth wet and like and for like just

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Speaker 1: sore throat. And they were recommended by Christin Chenowith on

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Speaker 1: this bloggeraid, you know the best singer ever, Christian Chennewith.

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Speaker 1: She um was like, I'm addicted to these. I did

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Speaker 1: them all the time, and so I got them and

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Speaker 1: I love them. But you cannot eat more than four

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Speaker 1: and your body turns into like when I used to

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Speaker 1: chew a lot of gum and like sugar free gum.

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Speaker 1: I was. I was toxic. My body was completely constantly

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Speaker 1: dealing with some kind of like thing it had to

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Speaker 1: get rid of because of fake sugar. And these have

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Speaker 1: something fake in them because it's it's over here. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's really great. Yeah, but I guess I lizo zem.

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Speaker 1: Maybe that's it. What's in these sorbital? That's it sorbital.

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Speaker 1: It's a fake sugar. It's gotta be because they're ten

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Speaker 1: galories of pieces. Do you think they're just like taste

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Speaker 1: really good. These are green apple. They just taste good

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Speaker 1: and they do make your mouth feel like, um, we

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Speaker 1: have Manuka honey, so they're like kind of honey fee

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Speaker 1: feel like they're delicious. They just make your mouth so wet.

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Speaker 1: They make it like slimy, not wet. Okay, So maybe

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Speaker 1: I mean that's honestly, I'm so sick of having that

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Speaker 1: does not respond to my body when it needs to. Um. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I put a gummy warm in there. It's a well

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Speaker 1: documented story from picking up a boyfriend at the airport

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Speaker 1: and I knew it was gonna finger me, so I

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Speaker 1: put his favorite candy inside. It's hilarious. It's my I

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Speaker 1: love doing gross jokes like, UM, this weekend there was um,

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Speaker 1: we checked in the hotel in Vegas and there was

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Speaker 1: this like mural on the wall. Like it's like a

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Speaker 1: sexy mural of a girl with like almost like um,

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Speaker 1: what are the garter belt kind of thing and she's

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Speaker 1: like sexy. It was just her torso and um, but

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Speaker 1: it was on the wall and it was kind of aggressive,

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Speaker 1: of like you know some of these hotels you check

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Speaker 1: into and they're like you're gonna fuck here if you

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Speaker 1: don't pussy, like, you don't get this hotel room unless

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Speaker 1: you're gonna really like get into some shit. Because it

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Speaker 1: was Vegas, So let me just show you what I did.

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Speaker 1: So and I just air dropped this to Chris when

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Speaker 1: he was like, we had there was an upstairs to

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Speaker 1: our hotel room was the nicest place at the MGM

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Speaker 1: Grand Where is this scam damn picture? Oh? Here is Oh?

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Speaker 1: I took a million of them? Did we stay there once?

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Speaker 1: When you end that sweet and then look like I

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Speaker 1: was going down on her? So I just like started

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Speaker 1: licking this wall and send it to him, so it

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Speaker 1: looked like I was like going down on this girl.

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Speaker 1: I mean literally there's like a hundred of these because

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Speaker 1: I was trying to get the right angle. Look at

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Speaker 1: now I'm trying to grab her tit. So I'm always

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Speaker 1: doing like childish um sex pranks and fun all the time.

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Speaker 1: I'm always just like I'm gonna get your dick, like

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna get it, and he'll be like stop it.

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Speaker 1: I'm like I'm gonna get it, and I just like

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Speaker 1: I'm always like in the covers, I'll just like slowly

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Speaker 1: sneak my hand and like a little snake that's going

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Speaker 1: through and then I'll just like grab it. Not in

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Speaker 1: a hurtful way, like I know how to not hurt him,

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Speaker 1: but um, it's so fun. I'm a little I like

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Speaker 1: being a little prank p Yeah, well looked real. Oh

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Speaker 1: thank you. Yeah. I mean I eventually got there with

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Speaker 1: the holding doing a selfie style. But the show this

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Speaker 1: weekend was crazy. I mean I just did five minutes

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Speaker 1: of comedy. It was a event for Keep Memory Alive,

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Speaker 1: which is to fight like to pretty much. It's the

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Speaker 1: one charity that finances the lou Ruvo Center for Brain

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Speaker 1: Health at the Cleveland Clinic. And this guy I met,

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Speaker 1: the guy that made this clinic and he named it

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Speaker 1: after his dad, lou Ruvo, who died of Alzheimer's. Anyway,

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Speaker 1: they did this huge benefit and he's been going on

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Speaker 1: twenty six years. I think this is the twenty six year.

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Speaker 1: And they always have like a big concert and in

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Speaker 1: one night, in one room they do a silent auction

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Speaker 1: and then they do a loud auction, I guess. And

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Speaker 1: they raised like thirty million dollars in a night with

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Speaker 1: the people that are here. These are the most rich

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Speaker 1: people in Las Vegas, and a lot of people fly

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Speaker 1: in for it. They were auctioning off yacht trips around

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Speaker 1: the world m for like you and twenty of your friends.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, who has twenty friends? I guess rich people

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Speaker 1: probably had. There's like not a deficit of friends when

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Speaker 1: you have that much money. Um watches uh tennis lessons

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Speaker 1: with Andre Agassi and stephie Graff, Um dinner with Wolfgang

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Speaker 1: Puck at his house with his wife, and then seven

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Speaker 1: of your friends and with world class entertainment during it.

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Speaker 1: So he's gonna have like someone performed during like all

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Speaker 1: these crazy things to bid on. But before the auction

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Speaker 1: was this dinner that was delicious and I was seated

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Speaker 1: at a table with Michael McDonald and his family, and

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Speaker 1: then Sam Moore, who's like this blues soul legend, yeah legend.

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Speaker 1: He was in a wheelchair. He's like in his nineties.

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Speaker 1: He's like so no, maybe maybe he's eighties, late eighties,

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Speaker 1: but he was um and his daughter and like it

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Speaker 1: was just like cool. Michael McDonald is his man, Michael

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Speaker 1: McDonald from the Dubie Brothers who sings like this, and

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Speaker 1: Chris and I are sitting next to this in this

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Speaker 1: table and then I do um five minutes of comedy

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Speaker 1: after the dinner, and I begged them to have like

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Speaker 1: someone bring me up. So they had this guy come

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Speaker 1: out for literally like two seconds to just be like

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Speaker 1: everyone quiet down, okay this next comedian. I'm like what?

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Speaker 1: And so I go out to kind of a rowdy

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Speaker 1: room and I had five minutes to get them to

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Speaker 1: shut up and listen and it was great. And then

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Speaker 1: I left the stage and then I just went back

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Speaker 1: to my table and got to enjoy the best show.

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Speaker 1: So it was like, um, you know, and then oh

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Speaker 1: I did I forgot to say Chad Kroger from Nickelback,

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Speaker 1: who is amazing who I met the day before, because

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Speaker 1: I got into Vegas the day before and ran into him.

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Speaker 1: As soon as they brought me in this back way.

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Speaker 1: I thought I was just gonna go to like the

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Speaker 1: lobby and like have to check in and all this stuff.

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Speaker 1: They bring me in this back way, they get me everything,

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Speaker 1: and then they just lead me up with Chad Kroger's

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Speaker 1: right there and his girlfriend who was like, Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I love you and she was like, I'm got a

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Speaker 1: stalker and I'm like, oh, that's so nice. And then

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, it's you hide and then he's

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Speaker 1: so nice, so cool, so funny. UM loved him, and

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Speaker 1: Alice Cooper was so freaking nice. I met him at

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Speaker 1: the rehearsal because we all got the end we're singing

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Speaker 1: taking It to the Street um together, and so at

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Speaker 1: the rehearsal I met him and Alice Cooper, who was

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Speaker 1: really nice and was familiar with me and told me

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Speaker 1: he has a sister named Nicki, but she spells at

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Speaker 1: nic k i E and that was I've never heard

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Speaker 1: that spelling before actually, so that was actually kind of interesting.

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Speaker 1: And then um, Michael McDonald is actually was high school

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Speaker 1: friends with my He's from Saint Louis. He's high school

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Speaker 1: friends with my voice teacher, Michael. So, how old is

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Speaker 1: your voice teacher? Sixty something? Oh wow, sixties. Yeah, but

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Speaker 1: he's pretty spry. I'm like kind of surprised he's that old. Um,

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Speaker 1: and he actually might be coming to see us in

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Speaker 1: Bloomington this week, and so I'm excited for you to

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Speaker 1: meet him. But um, yeah, I'm trying to think of

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Speaker 1: other things. It was just me. Yeah, that was just

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Speaker 1: it was weird. It was right before we walked on

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Speaker 1: stage age when she was like, I love you, and

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Speaker 1: she hugged me and was like, hugged me really hard.

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Speaker 1: She was like, I just think you were so great.

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, Paula. And then we

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Speaker 1: just like saying next to each other and then it

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Speaker 1: was time to go. But I didn't get any pictures

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Speaker 1: with anyone. I kind of was just like not even

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Speaker 1: thinking to do that. I knew that there it would

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Speaker 1: be well documented, so I wasn't like I wish I

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Speaker 1: would have maybe gotten more selfies with someone like the

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Speaker 1: legends like Michael McDonald And what were you chatting with

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Speaker 1: people about? Like what was the dinner conversation? Like, um, well,

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Speaker 1: I was sitting next to Michael McDonald's manager, Paul I

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Speaker 1: believe his name was, and that he was interesting because

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Speaker 1: he was talking about all the musicians he manages, Emmy,

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Speaker 1: Lou Harris and this new guy out of Austin. Then

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Speaker 1: he told me to look up for that. I forget

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Speaker 1: his name. Who else kings of leon Like he's a

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Speaker 1: big deal and started out in the record business. So

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Speaker 1: I just ever after watching that Geffen documentary, I'm kind

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Speaker 1: of I guess just I'm interested in how the music

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Speaker 1: business works and how people and the Elvis movie. I

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Speaker 1: know this is like why wouldn't you even be interested

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Speaker 1: in before? There's something about it now that I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I want to know how you got to managing musicians,

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Speaker 1: like and even listening to Rick Um what's his names? No,

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Speaker 1: he's the producer Rubin Ruben talk about Yeah, Rick Rubin,

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Speaker 1: who has no musical talent, talking about like his and

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Speaker 1: how important he's been in music. Like, I think that

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Speaker 1: it's interesting to get to talk to people who aren't

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Speaker 1: singers or musicians at all and like what their impacted

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Speaker 1: in how they got into music. And then it was

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Speaker 1: nice because he was like, well, when you're ready, I'm

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Speaker 1: waiting for you, Like, so now I have someone to

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Speaker 1: like give my demos if I ever want to do that.

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Speaker 1: Because he was really nice and like really encouraging and

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Speaker 1: um was cool. And they represent some comedians too, so

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Speaker 1: he's he's savvy with comedy. He was really nice though,

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Speaker 1: and and yeah it was just and then h And

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Speaker 1: it was nice because the night before I got into town,

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Speaker 1: I look at the I'm just like on Instagram and

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Speaker 1: they must have known where I was and where I

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Speaker 1: was going, because all of a sudden was like Bill

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Speaker 1: Maher at the MGM Grand and I'm like, I'm staying there,

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Speaker 1: you're here, And so I text him so I get

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Speaker 1: to go to his show, which was awesome and really

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Speaker 1: like me up about some stuff like all this weekend

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Speaker 1: I've been having like kind of Bill Marsh Like I've

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Speaker 1: been like anti woke all weekend and I've been like

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Speaker 1: just more like fuck PC and like just say what's

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Speaker 1: true like these I need. I need guys that are

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00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:32,000
Speaker 1: so far out like that to sometimes jolt me into

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Speaker 1: the right way of thinking. Like this weekend, I just

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Speaker 1: like I don't know, I've had no tolerance for people's feelings,

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Speaker 1: which I you know, I do love feelings, and I do,

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Speaker 1: but I do hate this new thing of like the

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Speaker 1: you know, which is not the new thing. We've all

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Speaker 1: called it out, but haven't. Your personality is being offended

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Speaker 1: about something. It's just I don't care if I hurt

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Speaker 1: those people's feelings. I used to say I care about

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Speaker 1: I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I don't care

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Speaker 1: if I hurt your feelings because you're not really You're

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Speaker 1: feelings aren't hurt. That's not what's going on there. And

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Speaker 1: I think I had that misconstrued with like, well, you

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Speaker 1: might not agree with their feelings being hurt, and they might,

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Speaker 1: you know, And I do have empathy for them, because

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Speaker 1: if you have nothing else going on for you except

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Speaker 1: to get offended at a vagina joke or whatever, the fuck,

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Speaker 1: your life must be like so sad and that I

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Speaker 1: do feel bad for you, and I don't mean to

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Speaker 1: make your life worse, but I think I make your

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Speaker 1: life better because you're getting excited about how much you

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Speaker 1: hate something. So I actually think I'm contributing. So this weekend,

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Speaker 1: though right after like my show was great, my five

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Speaker 1: minutes set like, which is not ideal to do that

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Speaker 1: little of time in a cold room. It went amazing

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Speaker 1: and amazingly I did. It was so funny. I was

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Speaker 1: just telling Matt because we did an interview. Me and

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Speaker 1: Matt just did an interview for Spin together, and he

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00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,040
Speaker 1: was talking to me about stuff, and I was like,

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00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:47,280
Speaker 1: I wrote to Anya this weekend to remind me of

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Speaker 1: like what bits to do for this set I had,

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Speaker 1: because she watches my show like every night and so

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Speaker 1: does Matt, and she's sent me this list. It was

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Speaker 1: like pedophiles, crowd interaction involving wheelchairs, like this is that's

383
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Speaker 1: five minutes and it's cool that most people don't probably

384
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:07,960
Speaker 1: don't know comedy is even happening in this room. She's

385
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:11,560
Speaker 1: like the story about John Body Ramsey murder. I'm like,

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00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:14,600
Speaker 1: I can't. It was so cute. I loved I love

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00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:16,399
Speaker 1: the list of it because it was it made me

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00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:20,240
Speaker 1: realize how un able I am to do so many

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Speaker 1: of my jokes like in that amount of time, which

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Speaker 1: is fine and is the way it should be. But

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Speaker 1: I just stuck to like the I pretty much was like, um, oh,

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Speaker 1: we ate this, like we ate this delicious vegan starter

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Speaker 1: which were these like beat cakes wolf all right. It

394
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:36,439
Speaker 1: was the people who do Crossroads in LA. It's one

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Speaker 1: of my favorite vegan restaurants. And this this beat cake

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00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:41,320
Speaker 1: that was so good, and so I go, how we

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Speaker 1: had just eaten dinner and I'm walking out stage and

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Speaker 1: I go, how good were those damn beat cakes? I

399
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:47,920
Speaker 1: was like, if you ate the beat cake tomorrow, your

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00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:49,879
Speaker 1: peat tonight or tomorrow, your peat is going to be

401
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Speaker 1: pink or reddish, You're not dying. You ate beats people,

402
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:56,640
Speaker 1: because it was in the dark, and it was valuable

403
00:19:56,680 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 1: to know because everyone in that room was old. Everyone

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00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:05,919
Speaker 1: there it's not yes. And then so and then um

405
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:09,160
Speaker 1: who gave me the tag Kevin Neilan, who I saw

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Speaker 1: later on, gave me the tag of like, and you

407
00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:13,880
Speaker 1: should have said and if you'r and if your shit

408
00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:16,520
Speaker 1: is diarrhea, it's because you ate that like and then

409
00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:19,840
Speaker 1: just say something else, like about some gross part of

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00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,600
Speaker 1: the food. It's because you ate the and the make

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00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:23,040
Speaker 1: fun of something. So I wish I would have done that,

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00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:24,959
Speaker 1: but I started out that way. So I called out

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00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:29,399
Speaker 1: something that everyone had experienced the room. And then Kevin

414
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,520
Speaker 1: was the Kevin was working at them, so Bill was

415
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Speaker 1: at the theater there, I was at the MGM Grand

416
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:36,919
Speaker 1: which is where they have like you know, boxing matches

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00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:39,160
Speaker 1: and you have c fights and Joe Rogan sells it out.

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Speaker 1: It's like I was backstage, it's like Billy Joel, Paul McCartney,

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00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:45,720
Speaker 1: like it was so like but they had closed off

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Speaker 1: like it was a fourth of it used, but it

421
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Speaker 1: was this huge stage. It was so cool. Um And

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Speaker 1: so yeah, Bill Maherr was at MGM Grand. Inside the

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Speaker 1: MGM Grand is the Brad Garrett Comedy Club. Kevin Neilan

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Speaker 1: was there, so I went to see Bill maher that night.

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Speaker 1: Hung out with Bill backstage age. I fucking love Bill

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Speaker 1: so much. I love him so much. It was so fun.

427
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,200
Speaker 1: He's just such a he's so different than he is

428
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:08,600
Speaker 1: on his show, Like he's just a dear friend. I

429
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:11,080
Speaker 1: love him. Good hang And then after that they were

430
00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:12,800
Speaker 1: going to strip club. So then I was like, now

431
00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:16,200
Speaker 1: I'm too tired. And then I was texting with Kevin.

432
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 1: I was like, just like, let's meet in this little

433
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:20,600
Speaker 1: like lounge area and we just sat down and meet

434
00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,840
Speaker 1: him and Chris hung out and then got to hang

435
00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:25,960
Speaker 1: out with Kevin a bunch and just talk about you know,

436
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:28,440
Speaker 1: Chris is producing the Sandler Special, so we talked to

437
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 1: him about like s and l stories. It was just

438
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:33,040
Speaker 1: so fun. And then the next night I had the

439
00:21:33,080 --> 00:21:36,320
Speaker 1: big show and then we had you know, lunch with Kevin,

440
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,240
Speaker 1: and then afterwards we also hung out with Kevin again.

441
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:41,439
Speaker 1: Like it was just a really good weekend of hangs

442
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:43,119
Speaker 1: with friends. And then but I want to tell you

443
00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:46,480
Speaker 1: the thing that the hot take I have after doing

444
00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:49,600
Speaker 1: this that was inspired I think by Bill Maher. It

445
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:51,240
Speaker 1: might be a little harsh, but I have a take

446
00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:53,880
Speaker 1: on something in the news that I want to give

447
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,480
Speaker 1: and you're gonna hear it here first, So stay with us.

448
00:21:57,520 --> 00:22:03,399
Speaker 1: We'll be right back. So did you guys see the

449
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:07,639
Speaker 1: Tiger Woods thing or hear about it a couple of

450
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:11,520
Speaker 1: years ago? Under No, this week, what happened? No, he

451
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 1: got in trouble. He like had to apologize already because

452
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:17,240
Speaker 1: he over the weekend. I guess he hit a shot

453
00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:22,160
Speaker 1: and then like a newer, like young promising golfer hit

454
00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:24,760
Speaker 1: a shot and it was either it was before him

455
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 1: or after him, but the Tiger hit like ten yards further. Okay,

456
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:32,159
Speaker 1: Then this guy and Tiger came up to him and

457
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:36,159
Speaker 1: and this was caught on camera. Tiger like went up

458
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,800
Speaker 1: to like shake his hand and the guy puts out

459
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:39,920
Speaker 1: his hand and Tiger puts a tampon in his hand

460
00:22:40,119 --> 00:22:43,760
Speaker 1: to be like, did you see this? I heard about it.

461
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 1: I was so confused by it. Why did he put

462
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:49,000
Speaker 1: a tampon in there? Like, okay, why do you think

463
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,160
Speaker 1: because he's a little bit oh to dry his hand

464
00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:55,960
Speaker 1: out because it was huggy. Oh my god, are we

465
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:59,880
Speaker 1: just having football? What's happening to imply like you hit

466
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:05,200
Speaker 1: like a girl? Yeah, he's a little bit yeah, yeah, okay.

467
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,760
Speaker 1: First of all, I saw it and I thought that's

468
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:10,080
Speaker 1: kind of funny. First of all, it's funny because Tiger

469
00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:12,879
Speaker 1: had to find a tampon keep it in his pocket

470
00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:17,360
Speaker 1: all day, Like there's not tampons like around like everything

471
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:21,680
Speaker 1: premeditated tampon, meaning before the match, he knew he was

472
00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:25,960
Speaker 1: going to hand this off. Yes, um, he had to

473
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 1: find a tampon, which is hilarious. And then he had

474
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,800
Speaker 1: to like just the guy, just the act of like

475
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:35,000
Speaker 1: the guy being like Tiger Woods is his kid's hero.

476
00:23:35,119 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 1: I'm guessing whoever he did it. I don't know the

477
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:39,440
Speaker 1: age of difference, but Tiger is definitely one of the

478
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:42,640
Speaker 1: older golfers. Now, this guy is a being approached by Tiger.

479
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,680
Speaker 1: He's playing against him, so he's probably like used to it.

480
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,880
Speaker 1: But there's a little bit of like Tiger's gonna shake

481
00:23:46,960 --> 00:23:49,760
Speaker 1: my hand, you know, like yes, and then a tampon's

482
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:52,879
Speaker 1: in it. That's funny. Now everyone's upset because this is

483
00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 1: discouraging women. This is saying that women are or like,

484
00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:00,639
Speaker 1: oh my god, that's an insult to dry like a woman.

485
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,680
Speaker 1: Drive as a hit a ball, drive right, or drive

486
00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:05,159
Speaker 1: a car like a woman. We're bad at that too,

487
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:13,119
Speaker 1: but how insulting. My take is that we do drive

488
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:16,919
Speaker 1: worse than men, not drive cars. We cannot hit balls

489
00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 1: as far as men. If you look at the statistics,

490
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:23,800
Speaker 1: women are weaker golfers in terms of distance. Okay, that's

491
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:26,520
Speaker 1: just the way it is. Let me just pull up

492
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:31,680
Speaker 1: this fact. The average distance for men who are on

493
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:35,200
Speaker 1: the PGA is to hit with a driver is two

494
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 1: hundred and eighty nine to three hundred and twenty three feet.

495
00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 1: The average distance for women in the LPGA is two

496
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:42,400
Speaker 1: hundred and forty six to two hundred and fifty eight feet.

497
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 1: So the furthest we could possibly hit it on average

498
00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:50,800
Speaker 1: is not is still thirty yards short of a man.

499
00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:56,159
Speaker 1: So Tiger saying this guy hits like a girl. He

500
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,520
Speaker 1: doesn't hit like a girl. He actually hits better than

501
00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:01,280
Speaker 1: a girl. Like it's he was wrong even in that

502
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:03,679
Speaker 1: girls could Girls would love to be able to hit

503
00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:06,440
Speaker 1: ten yards short of or whatever, ten feet. I don't

504
00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:08,600
Speaker 1: even know what the measurement is. My point is like,

505
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:13,600
Speaker 1: what's so bad? I know that it was negative connotation

506
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,879
Speaker 1: of like, oh, it's bad to be a girl. Women

507
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:20,600
Speaker 1: are worse at sports than men. That's why people watch

508
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,920
Speaker 1: less women's sports. It's true. It's like the Bill Birr

509
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 1: thing of like if you like the if you love

510
00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:30,320
Speaker 1: women's basketball so much, name one fucking team women? Where

511
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 1: why aren't women watching it? It's just we we all? So,

512
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:36,920
Speaker 1: I just I don't get what this is discouraging women?

513
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:40,960
Speaker 1: How about what you'll how about look at the stats

514
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 1: of how far you could drive if you work your

515
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:45,160
Speaker 1: harness as a woman and know that it will never

516
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 1: be as close to a man. Does that discourage women?

517
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:52,080
Speaker 1: Like that? No? Or maybe I have a question for

518
00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:54,240
Speaker 1: you because when I first saw as Bill Burr Special

519
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:55,840
Speaker 1: and I was like, I love this one part and

520
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:58,320
Speaker 1: you were like I hate that argument. Though I want

521
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:02,159
Speaker 1: to hear what your argument then was that I never

522
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:04,960
Speaker 1: hated that argument. Well, you were like, it's such a

523
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 1: it doesn't have weight what he's trying to prove, And

524
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,560
Speaker 1: and I know other people that have said that too,

525
00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 1: So do you remember what you meant at the time,

526
00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:15,919
Speaker 1: because you were like, because he says women watch the Kardashians,

527
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 1: that's where they put their focus and energy rather than

528
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:20,920
Speaker 1: I always loved this joke. I don't remember ever hating

529
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:23,440
Speaker 1: this or disagreeing with this joke, because it is true.

530
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:26,760
Speaker 1: It's I don't remember not saying it doesn't have weight,

531
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 1: but maybe I did. But you were like, it's a

532
00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:31,920
Speaker 1: fallacious argument. And other people have told me that too,

533
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 1: that they're like the premise is weak, that like, oh, well,

534
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:37,359
Speaker 1: the reason women don't make as much as in the

535
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 1: w NBA's because you guys aren't buying tickets. It's like

536
00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:42,920
Speaker 1: that doesn't take into account the patriarchy, like the much

537
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:48,440
Speaker 1: bigger system. That's flawed, right, And but this is why,

538
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:51,400
Speaker 1: like Bill Burr is because it doesn't it's not about feelings.

539
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,800
Speaker 1: It's I get that women's feelings are hurt by being

540
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:59,440
Speaker 1: connotated with Tampon's equal girl girl equals bad at sports,

541
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: but we are worse at sports than men, so you can't.

542
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:05,120
Speaker 1: That's why I like Bill Burr. You can have your

543
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 1: feelings hurt by this all you want, but it's true.

544
00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:11,360
Speaker 1: And I was talking to Mad about it just now,

545
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:13,680
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I think that's why I don't like

546
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:16,720
Speaker 1: sports is because I was never gonna be better than men,

547
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:20,040
Speaker 1: and I want to be able to compete against men

548
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 1: at the same level. Out Yeah, comedy, there's no I

549
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:28,520
Speaker 1: can drive just as far as a man can't. I mean,

550
00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 1: the world is stacked against me in a way that

551
00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:32,920
Speaker 1: hinders it a little bit, because I do believe that

552
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:35,159
Speaker 1: women are socialized to be less funny than men. They

553
00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:37,800
Speaker 1: are encouraged to be less funny. They're not the class clowns,

554
00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:41,600
Speaker 1: they're you know, all of that. So I I understand

555
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:44,320
Speaker 1: why people got upset about this. I'm not playing dumb

556
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 1: like oh that that he's implying girls are bad at sports,

557
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:52,000
Speaker 1: but they are compared to men. That's why we don't

558
00:27:52,040 --> 00:27:54,120
Speaker 1: compete against them at the same level because we would

559
00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 1: get smashed. So it's like he's and let me argue this.

560
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:03,879
Speaker 1: There was all this thing of like Tiger Woods should

561
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: he is the father of a daughter, which leave that

562
00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:10,080
Speaker 1: fucking thing at when people say, as the father of

563
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 1: a daughter, why don't you just care about women before

564
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:14,959
Speaker 1: you have a daughter? How about that you shouldn't care

565
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:16,960
Speaker 1: more about women because you have a daughter. Shut up,

566
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 1: you should just care about women. But everyone's so selfish

567
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,760
Speaker 1: that unless it's your thing, you don't care about it.

568
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:27,159
Speaker 1: So that's another argument. But also he was doing this

569
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:29,399
Speaker 1: as a private joke. It was just one guy to

570
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:34,840
Speaker 1: another guy being like immature college level frat humor. That

571
00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:38,720
Speaker 1: because that's where he stunted. He stopped socializing at the

572
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 1: age of seven and started he's he's stunted. Of course

573
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,440
Speaker 1: he's gonna make dumb jokes like this. I'm sure he

574
00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:47,000
Speaker 1: left at the words boobies. I mean, I'm still I'm

575
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: sure he still says boobies Tiger Woods because he wasn't

576
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:51,880
Speaker 1: socialized because he grew up on a golf course where

577
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 1: his dad was fucking you know, you know, prostitutes on

578
00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:58,000
Speaker 1: the green next to him. What I'm saying is that

579
00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:00,680
Speaker 1: it was a private joke between two men that was

580
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:03,440
Speaker 1: locker room talk type thing, which I'm not excusing that

581
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:05,760
Speaker 1: because Chris last night I was giving him this argument

582
00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:07,360
Speaker 1: He goes, well, you're you're acting like it's like locker

583
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,800
Speaker 1: room talk. We should let it go, and he goes,

584
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 1: that would be like the Trump locker room talking. I go,

585
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:15,040
Speaker 1: Trump was grabbing, was ragging about grabbing a woman by

586
00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:19,320
Speaker 1: the pussy without consent. That is different than palming a

587
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,080
Speaker 1: guy a tampon and implying that he hits like a girl.

588
00:29:22,480 --> 00:29:25,600
Speaker 1: And Tiger wasn't wanting this to go. He wasn't trying,

589
00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:28,520
Speaker 1: he wasn't doing a comedy special based upon me palming.

590
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:30,280
Speaker 1: He wasn't trying to get this out of the ether

591
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:35,560
Speaker 1: to know it was guess who did that? The fucking media.

592
00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:38,560
Speaker 1: So if you want to blame anyone for making women

593
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,320
Speaker 1: feel like they can't get into golf because they'll be

594
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 1: made fun of, blame the media for letting us know

595
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:47,280
Speaker 1: about this intimate moment that happened, and and writing all

596
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:49,720
Speaker 1: the thing pieces about it and making him apologize like

597
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 1: he shouldn't apologize. Yes, of course he did. This guy

598
00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 1: is scared to death of anything else that will do

599
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,600
Speaker 1: what he has PTSD. I'm sure from what happened to

600
00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:04,280
Speaker 1: him originally. But I just this idea that men and

601
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:07,600
Speaker 1: women are equal at sports but it also goes to

602
00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 1: what you were saying earlier about not wanting to hurt anyone,

603
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 1: you know, like changing your perspective on I don't want

604
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:15,640
Speaker 1: to hurt anyone's feelings, so I'm not going to say

605
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,520
Speaker 1: or do something. This wasn't intended for everyone. This was

606
00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:21,000
Speaker 1: just between Tiger and this other guy, and your feelings

607
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:23,400
Speaker 1: might get hurt. As a young girl who would want

608
00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:25,680
Speaker 1: to play golf and someone applied it was period just

609
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 1: started this week, and I'm like, oh, I'm using tampons,

610
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:30,719
Speaker 1: and he made it seem like if you use tampons,

611
00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 1: you're a bad golf like it might maybe it would,

612
00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:36,040
Speaker 1: it would hurt my feelings and discourage me from golfing,

613
00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 1: But I don't think that many women are being discouraged

614
00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:41,280
Speaker 1: this week from pursuing to show him like hey, I

615
00:30:41,480 --> 00:30:44,640
Speaker 1: could you know, be the best at my league or this,

616
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:48,080
Speaker 1: Like he has to apologize now, and like, I just

617
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:53,280
Speaker 1: it's just so do you think it's K? I think

618
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:56,040
Speaker 1: the joke was K, even though at first I was like,

619
00:30:56,120 --> 00:31:00,280
Speaker 1: it's kind of funny, but just picturing him like getting

620
00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 1: a tampon is hilarious. Where do you think it procuring

621
00:31:03,920 --> 00:31:08,240
Speaker 1: one like I bet he like asked his assistant to

622
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 1: go get one, and I bet he just went to

623
00:31:10,320 --> 00:31:13,680
Speaker 1: the women's restroom and like grab or like had someone

624
00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:15,240
Speaker 1: got a woman to go in the women's restroom and

625
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:17,239
Speaker 1: grab them, because I'm guessing at these country clubs, they

626
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 1: like have tampons everywhere, like in the dressing rooms are

627
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,000
Speaker 1: fully decked out, even though women weren't allowed there to

628
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,560
Speaker 1: like nineteen eighty six or something. But um and they're

629
00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:27,480
Speaker 1: still working on getting black women able to go in.

630
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:30,560
Speaker 1: But we'll get there. Um No. I've always had a

631
00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 1: problem with like like and these people are like everyone's

632
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:39,120
Speaker 1: just such a moralist and like, you know, tiptoeing around

633
00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:42,920
Speaker 1: people's feelings while they're consuming things that were made by children,

634
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 1: you know in foreign countries where they're they watch porn.

635
00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:49,000
Speaker 1: Everyone who's a goddamn moralist and pointing a finger like

636
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: it's they're doing something corrupt. Everyone as a fucking hypocrite,

637
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:56,280
Speaker 1: including myself. When I get hurt about things, it's always

638
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:57,840
Speaker 1: I always find a win in which I'm doing the

639
00:31:57,920 --> 00:32:01,600
Speaker 1: exact same thing and wanting to get away with it.

640
00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:04,840
Speaker 1: All the men that say, as the father of a daughter,

641
00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:08,000
Speaker 1: that's the biggest red flag for a guy that's doing

642
00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 1: some creepy stuff. I didn't know not to rape until

643
00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:14,000
Speaker 1: I brought a life in this world that had a vagina.

644
00:32:14,240 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 1: I didn't know that you shouldn't rape people like yass.

645
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Speaking of Seven Wives, I just got

646
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:27,280
Speaker 1: into Keep Sweet, Prey and Obey. Oh Jeff's documentary that

647
00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 1: was on that talk about it. I'm about that was

648
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:34,160
Speaker 1: that was. I mean those hairstyles weekend. That is a

649
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 1: pressing women. I know those hairstyles what took hours and

650
00:32:38,360 --> 00:32:41,960
Speaker 1: the men made them wear it like as they all

651
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:46,520
Speaker 1: look like um yeah, like in the background in the

652
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:48,800
Speaker 1: back of them, they look like yeah, it's it's like

653
00:32:48,920 --> 00:32:52,080
Speaker 1: a strange wave. Once Nikki did it to imitate Taylor

654
00:32:52,160 --> 00:32:54,760
Speaker 1: Swift's bangs. If he did that Taylor Swift bang, but

655
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:58,880
Speaker 1: up it's like a buffont kind of like amish. Yeah.

656
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:01,360
Speaker 1: And then they in the back of these intricate braids,

657
00:33:01,640 --> 00:33:03,000
Speaker 1: which would make them they would have to work on

658
00:33:03,040 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 1: their here for hours a day, and it was always

659
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 1: just to like control women. You have to wear it

660
00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:09,560
Speaker 1: like this. Now you have to wear long John's and

661
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,560
Speaker 1: like this this guy Warren Jeffs, I thought I knew

662
00:33:12,600 --> 00:33:15,120
Speaker 1: about what happened down there in Texas when there was

663
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 1: a raid. I kind of saw stuff. But it's way

664
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 1: more interesting than you think and disturbing and he's still

665
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:25,120
Speaker 1: in control. Spoiler alert, so it's really fucked up. Before

666
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:27,320
Speaker 1: Reddit dump, can we play the video? Because I've been

667
00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:31,360
Speaker 1: thinking about getting a pet recently. I've like I'm looking

668
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 1: at dogs while I'm out here test driving some you know,

669
00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 1: broken animals. I want an old dog that's small, that

670
00:33:39,680 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: can travel, and that's just kind of like I want

671
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:44,120
Speaker 1: to marry in pretty much that just like is easygoing

672
00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:47,200
Speaker 1: and no one else wants them because they're like kind

673
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:50,000
Speaker 1: of like ugly looking and they're small and they can

674
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:52,600
Speaker 1: travel and I can help, like, you know, we can

675
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:54,360
Speaker 1: be together for their last years of their life. Like

676
00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 1: I'm looking for a senior but it's a lot of asks,

677
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,360
Speaker 1: so I don't know if I'll find it. But what

678
00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:02,960
Speaker 1: animal asks? Oh, and I want to dog with a

679
00:34:03,040 --> 00:34:07,480
Speaker 1: lot of asks, So it's like Corgy a lot. I

680
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:11,080
Speaker 1: know I have Billy as a sex slave. Yeah, they

681
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:14,200
Speaker 1: get old, it gets That's what I'm I gotta realize,

682
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,120
Speaker 1: Like I gotta be ready to take this dog to

683
00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 1: the doctor a lot, like I'm signing up for like

684
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:22,319
Speaker 1: a lot of work, and that stresses me out because

685
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:25,160
Speaker 1: even if I think about having kids, I'm like, I

686
00:34:25,200 --> 00:34:26,840
Speaker 1: don't know how I'm going to get them to lessons

687
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:28,759
Speaker 1: and like sign them up for vaccines and like I

688
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:30,480
Speaker 1: don't even know. Like that all stressed me out. I

689
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:32,120
Speaker 1: just would never be able to do it. I just

690
00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:34,120
Speaker 1: know that I wouldn't be able to get them shuttle

691
00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:37,440
Speaker 1: them to lessons and practices, and oh, I don't want

692
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:40,160
Speaker 1: to deal with their schedules. So I have to really

693
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:43,200
Speaker 1: wrap my head around like either getting an assistant to

694
00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:46,000
Speaker 1: do this with my dog or like having because I

695
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 1: want them to have the utmost care, obviously in their

696
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,520
Speaker 1: senior year. So I just got to be ready for

697
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:52,480
Speaker 1: all that it entails, and I don't. I don't know

698
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:55,200
Speaker 1: if I am. But I also know that every day

699
00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:57,279
Speaker 1: that I don't have a little dog in my life

700
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 1: is a day that a dog is out there that

701
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:02,880
Speaker 1: could have love that I'm not giving it love. And

702
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:05,920
Speaker 1: it's like I'm wasting time. That's so nice. You and

703
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:09,120
Speaker 1: my other best friend, China, you guys are both motivated

704
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:12,560
Speaker 1: by the same thing. China only adopts senior dogs. She's

705
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 1: constantly like we lost her. She's always weeping and grieving

706
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:18,239
Speaker 1: and always spending six thousand dollars at the vet. But

707
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:21,840
Speaker 1: she's saved so many dogs lives. Yes, I don't the

708
00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:24,439
Speaker 1: idea that a little dog that like his owner died

709
00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:27,040
Speaker 1: or they were abandoned because the family moved ran out

710
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:31,319
Speaker 1: of money, that like just spends their their senior years

711
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,160
Speaker 1: as senior citizen dogs alone. It just breaks my heart.

712
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:36,799
Speaker 1: And I want a dog that's like and senior dogs.

713
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 1: They like move slower, they don't need as much exercise.

714
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,080
Speaker 1: They're kind of just like they're they're down to be

715
00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 1: carried around all the time, and that's what I want.

716
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,799
Speaker 1: They love Florida, Yeah, and I go there a lot

717
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:50,759
Speaker 1: for shows. Yeah yeah, okay, So but I don't think

718
00:35:50,800 --> 00:35:52,959
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get a bird. And it's so funny because

719
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:57,239
Speaker 1: I was looking into getting a Quaker parrot because they're

720
00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:59,879
Speaker 1: the cutest. They're type of parrots. They have really fat

721
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:04,480
Speaker 1: and typebraids. Get a fundamentalist parrot, they turn their own

722
00:36:04,520 --> 00:36:10,520
Speaker 1: butter um. They were persecuted for their religious beliefs in

723
00:36:11,280 --> 00:36:15,000
Speaker 1: the early fourteen hundreds. I don't know what the please

724
00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:19,359
Speaker 1: don't this is. We know nothing territory, but I wanted

725
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:22,080
Speaker 1: to get a quaker parrot because there's just an easy

726
00:36:22,239 --> 00:36:23,560
Speaker 1: like if you want to get a parrot like not

727
00:36:23,640 --> 00:36:25,680
Speaker 1: a parakeet cockatil and you want to ease up to

728
00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 1: like actual like parrot parrot, a quaker is a what

729
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:31,279
Speaker 1: I've been told a good option. There's lots of them

730
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:34,920
Speaker 1: in bird rescue that need home. So I was about

731
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:37,319
Speaker 1: to get a parrot, a quaker parrot at one point

732
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,799
Speaker 1: a couple of months ago. Didn't do it, and I'm

733
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,920
Speaker 1: almost glad I didn't because a couple besties sent this

734
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:46,279
Speaker 1: video and it's so funny and it really discouraged me.

735
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:48,520
Speaker 1: But I don't want to discourage people who are interested

736
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:50,960
Speaker 1: in bird rescue. I just don't have the life to

737
00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 1: devote to this. So just watch this. It's so it's

738
00:36:53,640 --> 00:36:57,120
Speaker 1: so funny or listening about me. That is, when I

739
00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:00,200
Speaker 1: was ten, my mom said I could pick out out

740
00:37:00,520 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 1: any pet, and so I picked this bird without no

741
00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:12,400
Speaker 1: wing that it can never die. Additionally, realize that quake

742
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: per parrots were undomesticatable, which means they're vicious to everyone

743
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 1: but me. And now I'm legal in the state of Colorado.

744
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:28,920
Speaker 1: Don't come for us. Anyway, if you're considering getting a bird,

745
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:33,839
Speaker 1: specifically a Quaker parrot, just don't. They're like, they're great.

746
00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:36,799
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have this bird in my entire life. It's

747
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 1: like my sibling. But they're terrible pets. Just get a

748
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:44,880
Speaker 1: fucking just get a fucking cat. She says she noticed.

749
00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,080
Speaker 1: She said they're like a sibling, not like a like

750
00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:49,600
Speaker 1: a son. Like She's just like, I don't want to

751
00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:51,719
Speaker 1: my pet that feels like a sibling. I'll tell you that.

752
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:56,400
Speaker 1: How long do these fuckers live? Like thirty years? I

753
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,920
Speaker 1: think Quakers are just domestically like thirty years. And she

754
00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:02,440
Speaker 1: seemed to be when she was ten. She said she

755
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:05,359
Speaker 1: got the birds, so I don't know it's gonna be. Yeah,

756
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:07,640
Speaker 1: she literally in her thirties, so the parrots got a

757
00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:11,000
Speaker 1: little bit longer to go. No, My my voice teacher

758
00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:16,360
Speaker 1: had a Amazon parrot in like the seventies that he

759
00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:18,560
Speaker 1: just you know, was moving and had this big cage,

760
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:20,320
Speaker 1: couldn't take care of it. His friend was like, I'll

761
00:38:20,360 --> 00:38:22,440
Speaker 1: have him. And his friend who he lost touch with,

762
00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,120
Speaker 1: just got in touch with him on LinkedIn like five

763
00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:28,320
Speaker 1: years ago, and he was like, Rodney is still alive.

764
00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 1: And then they put his voice on speakerphone and he

765
00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:33,960
Speaker 1: was like Rodney, and the bird was going crazy, and

766
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 1: he was like he's probably being like where does that

767
00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,520
Speaker 1: motherfucker off find him? Because they're they want to kill you.

768
00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:40,800
Speaker 1: Like a lot of birds, like they're not meant to

769
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:44,480
Speaker 1: be in cages, none of them. They're completely undomesticatable. Like

770
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:46,440
Speaker 1: that's we haven't gotten to that point yet. I think,

771
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,839
Speaker 1: you know, budgies are a little bit more like chill

772
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:54,959
Speaker 1: being you know, domesticated meaning owned by humans and told

773
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:59,359
Speaker 1: when to do. Slaves to humans. Is that what domesticated

774
00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:01,920
Speaker 1: is essentially, is that like a nice word for like

775
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:04,239
Speaker 1: animals who are slaves. That's what I was going to

776
00:39:04,320 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 1: ask is maybe you know the answer to this, why

777
00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:09,120
Speaker 1: are their parrot rescues? Like why don't I just let

778
00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:12,040
Speaker 1: them go? Because they can't they don't know how to

779
00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:15,440
Speaker 1: fend for themselves. Yeah, And the only reason pair rescues

780
00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:19,120
Speaker 1: exist are too the ideal a parrot rescue would love

781
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:21,560
Speaker 1: to not exist. They would love to never have people

782
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:24,520
Speaker 1: buy parrots ever again. But they only exist because people

783
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:28,879
Speaker 1: are breeding parrots. And the same with breeding dogs. It's

784
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:33,080
Speaker 1: like you don't need to breed anymore. We just we

785
00:39:33,239 --> 00:39:36,040
Speaker 1: have enough dogs. Like, if you took all the parrots

786
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:38,239
Speaker 1: that are rescued, and you took them, let's say, to

787
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 1: Peru or wherever they're supposed to be somewhere in the

788
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:44,759
Speaker 1: tropics and you know, someplace livable, would they not be

789
00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:47,840
Speaker 1: able to survive there? I don't think so, no, because

790
00:39:48,239 --> 00:39:51,439
Speaker 1: that would be obviously the solution. Yeah, they're they lived

791
00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:55,680
Speaker 1: in cages for decades, you know, these birds, And I

792
00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 1: think that and yet another thing. Yeah, and you know what,

793
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 1: they're continuing to do it. There's there's a man right

794
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:05,520
Speaker 1: now somewhere in a rainforest stealing eggs out of a

795
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 1: mast to sell on the black market. I mean, it

796
00:40:07,600 --> 00:40:09,480
Speaker 1: happens all the time. You see those videos of people

797
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:11,080
Speaker 1: getting stopped at the border and they have a bunch

798
00:40:11,120 --> 00:40:13,319
Speaker 1: of birds in their belt, like little birds that are

799
00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:17,080
Speaker 1: like rolled up in little paper towels, and they're like, oh, yeah,

800
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:19,600
Speaker 1: it happens all the people. They're smuggling exotic animals all

801
00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:23,000
Speaker 1: the time because rich people love to buy to own

802
00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:26,480
Speaker 1: things that they can't take care of. It's just it's tragic.

803
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:29,480
Speaker 1: And yeah, so I'm not gonna get a Quaker parro

804
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:31,359
Speaker 1: at anytime soon. But let's do reddit dump and see

805
00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 1: what else we learned today. Karaoke mode. This is your

806
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:41,279
Speaker 1: reddit dump. This is from me I r L. And

807
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:43,920
Speaker 1: it's a tweet that says, imagine falling in love with

808
00:40:44,520 --> 00:40:46,759
Speaker 1: Imagine falling in love with someone just to find out

809
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:50,239
Speaker 1: they watch Netflix with subtitles. And then someone replied to

810
00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:53,120
Speaker 1: that and said, I'm convinced people who don't like subtitles

811
00:40:53,239 --> 00:40:56,400
Speaker 1: can't read fast. What are your thoughts on both of

812
00:40:56,440 --> 00:41:01,640
Speaker 1: these things? I don't. I don't don't have this discrimination

813
00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:04,320
Speaker 1: because I just started using subtitle titles once in a

814
00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:08,680
Speaker 1: while because I have trouble hearing stuff. Yeah, because of

815
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:12,640
Speaker 1: all the years blasting music, and so I don't mind them.

816
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:15,200
Speaker 1: I don't like it when I can hear. But also

817
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:17,399
Speaker 1: our system is weird because Matt has like these big

818
00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:20,440
Speaker 1: speakers and there's like too much base echo. Yeah. So

819
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:23,120
Speaker 1: I'm just liked. I can't stand my tooth. I chip

820
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:24,759
Speaker 1: my tooth and I just keep looking at it, and

821
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:30,200
Speaker 1: I like, crazy, you chip it on a mango of

822
00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:33,720
Speaker 1: I mean a fucking mango. Yeah, like a mango slice,

823
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:35,680
Speaker 1: like a drive. I was slicing it and I was

824
00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:38,240
Speaker 1: thinking about how I have a dentist appointment on Tuesday,

825
00:41:38,239 --> 00:41:41,240
Speaker 1: and I was scraping the mango and all my sins

826
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:42,719
Speaker 1: were getting stuck in my teeth, and then all of

827
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 1: a sudden, my tooth was gone, chip, Oh well good,

828
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 1: you get it fixed tomorrow. Tomorrow. I've looked like, um,

829
00:41:49,080 --> 00:41:51,840
Speaker 1: it's weird how you look poor if you have a

830
00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,920
Speaker 1: piece of your tooth. Yeah, it's like having green bubbles

831
00:41:55,920 --> 00:41:59,799
Speaker 1: on your iPhone. Yeah. I like that there's a gap,

832
00:42:00,520 --> 00:42:03,520
Speaker 1: like in the mild I feel like Madonna, a little Madonna,

833
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,480
Speaker 1: but in the middle. Yeah, you don't look poor the

834
00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:09,600
Speaker 1: gap in them. As long as it's symmetrical. I'm like,

835
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:14,480
Speaker 1: I'm either Italian looking like you're a British singer. Yeah. Yeah, um.

836
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:16,800
Speaker 1: But anyway, I don't mind subtitles so much. If I

837
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 1: can hear, I prefer them gone so I can focus

838
00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:21,240
Speaker 1: on the acting. But yeah, I don't have like anger

839
00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 1: about it. I turned them off. Like last night, I

840
00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:26,680
Speaker 1: was taking Chris through like my favorite Julia Louis Dreyfust

841
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:29,200
Speaker 1: moments in like Seinfeld and Veep, and we were just

842
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:31,040
Speaker 1: like he kind of like, lets me just go through

843
00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:32,920
Speaker 1: and be like, oh now this clip, wait, hold on,

844
00:42:33,239 --> 00:42:35,960
Speaker 1: she's so amazing in this, and I was noticing that

845
00:42:36,120 --> 00:42:38,799
Speaker 1: the jokes were coming up before the dialogue or before

846
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: her delivery, so it was bothering me, so I turned them.

847
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:43,440
Speaker 1: I would I go, I flicker in and off. I

848
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:47,080
Speaker 1: am on and off. But I like I like a

849
00:42:47,239 --> 00:42:50,880
Speaker 1: subtitle because I like to know every I want to

850
00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:53,719
Speaker 1: know everything. I don't want to miss anything, and I

851
00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:56,879
Speaker 1: stay focus shows where you can miss a great joke

852
00:42:57,000 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 1: because they're so fast, and then you can appreciate that

853
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:02,120
Speaker 1: way it can be rue. And because so much comedy

854
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:05,360
Speaker 1: is one hundred percent about surprise and not seeing it coming,

855
00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:08,360
Speaker 1: and not one hundred percent, but I would say fifty

856
00:43:08,400 --> 00:43:11,640
Speaker 1: percent about it. So if you watch comedy things with subtitles,

857
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:14,719
Speaker 1: you're not having the true experience I believe, So I

858
00:43:14,760 --> 00:43:16,960
Speaker 1: would watch, I would definitely take them off. If you're

859
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 1: someone who uses subtitles, I think you'll enjoy comedy things

860
00:43:19,040 --> 00:43:20,719
Speaker 1: a lot more and you don't even realize that you're

861
00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 1: having it ruined for you by seeing it. But I

862
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:26,880
Speaker 1: do believe that people can't read fast, and that is

863
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 1: a thing that like that and it makes me, you know,

864
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,320
Speaker 1: that slightly makes me feel superior because I feel like

865
00:43:32,320 --> 00:43:34,520
Speaker 1: I'm a pretty fast reader. But I'm just fast at general.

866
00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:38,359
Speaker 1: It's not because I'm smarter everything. Okay. So the person

867
00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:40,880
Speaker 1: was mad at people that don't like subtitles because it

868
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 1: means that they can't read fast. No, he wasn't mad

869
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,839
Speaker 1: at them. He's just like he's responding to this girl

870
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:47,960
Speaker 1: who's like if you have, like, imagine being in love

871
00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 1: with someone and then you find out that use subtitles,

872
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:51,719
Speaker 1: like she was judging people use subtitles, and he goes

873
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:54,040
Speaker 1: my thought as anyone who doesn't like subtitles just can't

874
00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:56,480
Speaker 1: read fast. And so he was just you know, you know,

875
00:43:57,239 --> 00:43:59,920
Speaker 1: getting back at our dissoner. Okay, And this is another

876
00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:03,399
Speaker 1: tweet from me. I r L between me and real life.

877
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:07,279
Speaker 1: Why do people insist on surviving the apocalypse when you

878
00:44:07,360 --> 00:44:11,600
Speaker 1: can just die? And I relate to that so much.

879
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:13,319
Speaker 1: I was talking to Chris last night about The Last

880
00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 1: of Us. We watched the new episode and I was like, so,

881
00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:19,400
Speaker 1: you know, if there's this is a spoiler alert for

882
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 1: the first episode, but like this guy is like very

883
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:24,080
Speaker 1: affected by his daughter's death. He didn't save his daughter

884
00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:25,839
Speaker 1: in the first episode, Okay, and that's like the whole

885
00:44:25,920 --> 00:44:28,600
Speaker 1: series is like his struggling with that. And I made

886
00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 1: the point last night to Chris that if I were him,

887
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 1: I would kind of be glad my daughter didn't survive

888
00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:38,920
Speaker 1: past that first day because life became hell or hell

889
00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:42,560
Speaker 1: Fedra took over. They had to live in Quzi camps

890
00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:44,839
Speaker 1: like it was bad life, So like, in a way,

891
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:47,120
Speaker 1: it was good she died. I would have been like, Dad,

892
00:44:47,360 --> 00:44:49,520
Speaker 1: thank you. I know, I don't have to eat camps.

893
00:44:49,640 --> 00:44:52,400
Speaker 1: First of all, died from someone shooting me as opposed

894
00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:54,920
Speaker 1: to like a weird mushroom man showing on my neck,

895
00:44:55,160 --> 00:44:58,239
Speaker 1: Like this is way better. So I'm like he, I

896
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:00,719
Speaker 1: feel like his daughter. They should have had his killed

897
00:45:00,719 --> 00:45:03,920
Speaker 1: in the beginning by up by a mushroom man, because

898
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:06,680
Speaker 1: there's that would have been a more disturbing thing for

899
00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:09,600
Speaker 1: him to recover from, even though losing your daughter is

900
00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:11,759
Speaker 1: sad enough and I shouldn't make it worse. But um,

901
00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:16,239
Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with the show. Obsessed with the show, love love,

902
00:45:16,360 --> 00:45:21,080
Speaker 1: love everything about it. I am so into their relationship.

903
00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:23,640
Speaker 1: This will they won't they? I'm just kidding this, Like,

904
00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:27,920
Speaker 1: but I mean she didn't like drink alcohol the other night,

905
00:45:27,920 --> 00:45:30,880
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, so that's gonna happen. Um, she's fourteen,

906
00:45:31,000 --> 00:45:34,440
Speaker 1: so but I'm you know, she's nineteen in real life. Um,

907
00:45:34,560 --> 00:45:36,879
Speaker 1: she's wearing a million sports bras, which you can see

908
00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 1: sometimes and scenes like you can see the outline of

909
00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:41,160
Speaker 1: the top of the sports bras in her shirt, especially

910
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 1: when she's getting your hair in the last episode, she's

911
00:45:44,120 --> 00:45:46,520
Speaker 1: so Hilary swanking it. Yeah, because she's trying to be

912
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:49,400
Speaker 1: fourteen like so like, if you layer enough sports bras,

913
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 1: it will be flat. But she's wearing a ton of

914
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 1: sports bras. But she is incredible, and just I feel

915
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:58,440
Speaker 1: like I wish I would have had a influence like that.

916
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:00,799
Speaker 1: I think Harriet the Spot I was the closest thing

917
00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: I got to like that kind of precocious. I'm not stunning,

918
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:09,360
Speaker 1: Like I'm not like a stunning little child actor like

919
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:15,600
Speaker 1: John Bennet. Gorgeous, cool, scrappy, funny, loves comedy, kind of

920
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:18,960
Speaker 1: likes boys. Stuff like a good influence for young women.

921
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:21,160
Speaker 1: So I just love the show. And he is so

922
00:46:21,400 --> 00:46:25,760
Speaker 1: fucking hot. I can't it's it feels again. It feels

923
00:46:26,080 --> 00:46:28,360
Speaker 1: thankfully Chris is on board with how hot he is

924
00:46:28,480 --> 00:46:31,040
Speaker 1: and I'm not like swooning like theo James levels of

925
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:33,800
Speaker 1: like I gotta be alone for this. But he is

926
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:39,919
Speaker 1: very the guy Joel in this Pedro. Yeah, he's he's hot,

927
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:42,920
Speaker 1: he's he's Um, he's such a good actor. Everyone in

928
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:45,320
Speaker 1: the show is a good actor. But um, just his

929
00:46:45,440 --> 00:46:46,880
Speaker 1: love for this girl. But I like that. It's not

930
00:46:47,000 --> 00:46:49,560
Speaker 1: like I'm not compelled by like a romance. There's no

931
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:52,160
Speaker 1: romance in this that's like getting me on board. Um.

932
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:54,160
Speaker 1: It's just such a good show and I think people

933
00:46:54,160 --> 00:47:00,640
Speaker 1: should get into it. Okay, um uh oh Okay. So

934
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:02,359
Speaker 1: this is kind of a long one, but it's good.

935
00:47:02,719 --> 00:47:05,040
Speaker 1: So this one was from made Me Smile, and I'll

936
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 1: paraphrase it. This is the subreddit made me smile. Also

937
00:47:09,640 --> 00:47:11,440
Speaker 1: at the end, I want to go over my subreddits

938
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:13,600
Speaker 1: because people have been asking me I just joined Reddit,

939
00:47:13,600 --> 00:47:15,239
Speaker 1: and I want to know what subredate's joined. So I'll

940
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:16,920
Speaker 1: give some people sum at the end. But made me

941
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:19,360
Speaker 1: smile as a good one, this said Curb Your Enthusiasm

942
00:47:19,440 --> 00:47:23,920
Speaker 1: director Robert B. Weedy, w e I d obituary for

943
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:28,839
Speaker 1: his wife. Okay, so he says, Linda Weedy, my remarkable wife.

944
00:47:28,920 --> 00:47:31,680
Speaker 1: Will believed everybody's age was nobody's business. Let's just say

945
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:33,960
Speaker 1: she was ageless and timeless. She had a kind of

946
00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 1: elegance from another era. She started acting Da da Da

947
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 1: Da da. She did all this stuff. Her bravery and

948
00:47:40,120 --> 00:47:42,080
Speaker 1: dignity in the face of this illness were on inspiring,

949
00:47:42,120 --> 00:47:44,960
Speaker 1: but unfortunately the house always wins. She died on Christmas Day,

950
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:47,439
Speaker 1: twenty twenty two, peacefully at home and in my arms.

951
00:47:47,480 --> 00:47:48,800
Speaker 1: If you must die, tried to do it in the

952
00:47:48,920 --> 00:47:51,200
Speaker 1: arms of someone who loves you. It helps, and he

953
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:55,480
Speaker 1: goes into her education. She lived for a time in Boston,

954
00:47:55,560 --> 00:47:57,640
Speaker 1: then Manhattan, and at nineteen eighty nine she moved to

955
00:47:57,719 --> 00:48:00,320
Speaker 1: Los Angeles. Thank God for the last move, because on

956
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:03,360
Speaker 1: September thirtieth, nineteen ninety four, I walked into Cafe Aroma

957
00:48:03,440 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 1: in Studio City, which I know, and there she was.

958
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:09,520
Speaker 1: She had it all, beauty, style, grace, intelligence, wit and

959
00:48:09,719 --> 00:48:12,320
Speaker 1: great a great laugh, a blinding smile and can I

960
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:14,759
Speaker 1: say this into twenty twenty three legs that demanded to

961
00:48:14,840 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 1: be shown off and were that night, I wrote in

962
00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:19,320
Speaker 1: my journal, I think I may be in big trouble.

963
00:48:19,440 --> 00:48:22,600
Speaker 1: We were married on July eleventh, ninety eight. She was

964
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 1: remarkably low maintenance. We both appreciated the occasional meal in

965
00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:27,799
Speaker 1: a fine restaurant and traveling abroad. But some years I'd

966
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:29,680
Speaker 1: ask what she wanted for her birthday and she would

967
00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:32,400
Speaker 1: answer a grilled cheese sandwich. Typical. She was generous to

968
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 1: a fault, always putting others needs before her own. Her

969
00:48:35,160 --> 00:48:39,959
Speaker 1: soft softest spot was reserved for animals, especially those in need. Okay,

970
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:41,799
Speaker 1: all their animals were rescued, but da da da da.

971
00:48:42,080 --> 00:48:47,120
Speaker 1: She donated many charities. She understandably would become disenchanted with acting,

972
00:48:47,239 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 1: but two memorable roles were that of Penelope in the

973
00:48:49,600 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 1: two thousand and one stage revival of Kurt Vonneget's Happy

974
00:48:53,120 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 1: Birthday Wanda June. And then she played the role of

975
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,840
Speaker 1: Mindy Riiser in Curb Enthusiasm episode The Terrorist Tacked and

976
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:02,200
Speaker 1: then he talks about then this is the part what

977
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:04,720
Speaker 1: a team we made. She was Gracie to my George.

978
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:07,440
Speaker 1: After we purchased side by side cemetery plots years ago,

979
00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:09,160
Speaker 1: I asked her what she wanted her marker to say.

980
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:14,120
Speaker 1: She answered, I'm with stupid and rode in parentheses that

981
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:17,440
Speaker 1: request would not be honored. Oh dear, what am I

982
00:49:17,520 --> 00:49:20,720
Speaker 1: ever supposed to do without her? They say? Nothing less forever,

983
00:49:20,880 --> 00:49:23,240
Speaker 1: but they didn't know about my love for her. Twenty

984
00:49:23,280 --> 00:49:25,920
Speaker 1: eight years wasn't nearly long enough. Still, I may be

985
00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:29,320
Speaker 1: just the luckiest s ob who ever lived. Rest well, Bunny.

986
00:49:29,400 --> 00:49:32,320
Speaker 1: I hope we'll be together again. For those Oh, this

987
00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:34,520
Speaker 1: is the part for those who never knew her, I'm

988
00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:38,319
Speaker 1: sorry for your loss. How good is that? For those

989
00:49:38,360 --> 00:49:40,759
Speaker 1: who never knew her, I'm sorry for your loss as

990
00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:44,840
Speaker 1: opposed to like, it's like we got something. It's not

991
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 1: our loss. We knew her. It's so sweet and like

992
00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:51,759
Speaker 1: if you just gotta have that's what you need is

993
00:49:51,800 --> 00:49:54,440
Speaker 1: someone who thinks about you like that. Like, what a beautiful,

994
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:58,719
Speaker 1: um tribute. I just loved. I loved it so so

995
00:49:58,920 --> 00:50:04,959
Speaker 1: so much. Um. Okay that is a sad one. Um god,

996
00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 1: damn it. Okay, this is a good one. I know

997
00:50:07,560 --> 00:50:12,239
Speaker 1: you're crying. Does your vagina hurt? Oh yeah, oh my god,

998
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:16,440
Speaker 1: that's right. Vagina vaginal wink? Thanks to the best sea

999
00:50:16,520 --> 00:50:18,760
Speaker 1: that wrote in about that. I thought I was alone

1000
00:50:18,840 --> 00:50:21,440
Speaker 1: in my weird So what is it? It's called a

1001
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 1: vaginal wink with the thing that I get, which is

1002
00:50:23,760 --> 00:50:27,839
Speaker 1: if anyone describes someone that I care about getting hurt

1003
00:50:28,080 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 1: or doing anything scary, or if I see them, I

1004
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:35,160
Speaker 1: don't have to. It can happen with almost anything, but

1005
00:50:35,280 --> 00:50:37,839
Speaker 1: it's only talk about like a paper cut they got

1006
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:41,080
Speaker 1: or something like that, maybe like in the last five years.

1007
00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:42,879
Speaker 1: And then it just feels like I'm on a roller

1008
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:45,800
Speaker 1: coaster really quick, but a bad feeling almost like not

1009
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:48,719
Speaker 1: good roller coaster. Yeah, one, you're not strapped one of

1010
00:50:48,719 --> 00:50:51,880
Speaker 1: the you know, decapitated a kid in twenty eleven in

1011
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:56,680
Speaker 1: Kansas City. That one is probably the worst. Oh my god, Yes,

1012
00:50:57,040 --> 00:51:01,960
Speaker 1: what is everything bad? And treasury of morbid stories in

1013
00:51:02,080 --> 00:51:06,359
Speaker 1: my brain like this weekend the Murdock murders. I think

1014
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:09,919
Speaker 1: on the Girls Chat Taylor reference the Murdock murders. There's

1015
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:13,840
Speaker 1: a new documentary coming up. I don't I don't remember

1016
00:51:13,880 --> 00:51:18,080
Speaker 1: their last name. I should, but it is the crisliest

1017
00:51:18,160 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 1: crime ever. And I don't even want to watch a

1018
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:22,640
Speaker 1: documentary because it's so sad. But look for that soon. Okay,

1019
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,440
Speaker 1: here's um right before we go to break me I

1020
00:51:25,680 --> 00:51:30,759
Speaker 1: r L tip for newlyweds listening on you that ye

1021
00:51:31,160 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 1: send a wedding invite to every billionaire who's address you

1022
00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,560
Speaker 1: can find, because it's a fifty fifty chance their assistants

1023
00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:39,319
Speaker 1: just put you send you a perfunctory gift without ever

1024
00:51:39,440 --> 00:51:42,960
Speaker 1: wondering who the hell you are? How many billionaires do

1025
00:51:43,080 --> 00:51:45,200
Speaker 1: I know? Or I just send it to any like

1026
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:50,640
Speaker 1: and he's coming to the wedding. We have a friend

1027
00:51:50,640 --> 00:51:52,360
Speaker 1: who's married to a billionaire. He just gives me a

1028
00:51:52,400 --> 00:51:55,920
Speaker 1: grilled cheese sandwich. Okay, we gotta go a break more.

1029
00:51:56,000 --> 00:52:03,480
Speaker 1: We'll come back with more after this. Um yike, all right,

1030
00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:06,080
Speaker 1: we're back a couple more Reddit things. This is from

1031
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:09,160
Speaker 1: life hacks, and this one is so good. Okay. It

1032
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:12,920
Speaker 1: says after using and rinsing the plunger, which is like, yeah,

1033
00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:15,080
Speaker 1: the plunger. For some reason, the plunger sounded like the

1034
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:17,239
Speaker 1: wood that they call the Brits call it or something

1035
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:19,520
Speaker 1: the plonga, but that's what we call it. I don't

1036
00:52:19,560 --> 00:52:21,680
Speaker 1: know why. I was like, which is what we call

1037
00:52:22,320 --> 00:52:27,320
Speaker 1: the poopsucker is probably like a shovel like you probably

1038
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: is something. Yes, do you have the water shovel? Okay? Um,

1039
00:52:32,719 --> 00:52:36,120
Speaker 1: After using and rinsing the plunga, rest it under the

1040
00:52:36,239 --> 00:52:39,319
Speaker 1: seat to dry. Avoid dripping commode water. That's where they

1041
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:43,200
Speaker 1: got me, commode avoid dripping toilet water on the floor. Okay,

1042
00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 1: so look at what they're doing interesting. So you take

1043
00:52:46,560 --> 00:52:48,840
Speaker 1: the toilet seat and you put the handle between the

1044
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 1: toilet seat and the toilet the porcelain itself, and then

1045
00:52:51,719 --> 00:52:54,240
Speaker 1: it hangs in there and drips dry. And then because

1046
00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:56,320
Speaker 1: that is a disgusting thing when you use the brush

1047
00:52:56,719 --> 00:52:58,440
Speaker 1: or the plunger, and you kind of like knock it

1048
00:52:58,560 --> 00:53:01,279
Speaker 1: around to get it all off, and then you just

1049
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:03,879
Speaker 1: take a chance to like quickly move it to its

1050
00:53:03,920 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 1: little home. Day goost. What do you say, day goost?

1051
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:11,160
Speaker 1: Day day day goot. We we say dagoutte was disgusting

1052
00:53:11,239 --> 00:53:13,279
Speaker 1: in French and we shortened it to day goot. Me

1053
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,719
Speaker 1: and my friends, Um, it's tred goot. If I can,

1054
00:53:16,880 --> 00:53:20,480
Speaker 1: I'll run, I'll run the plunger brush or whatever. It's

1055
00:53:20,480 --> 00:53:23,000
Speaker 1: not a plunger, it's a brush, that's oh we're talking

1056
00:53:23,040 --> 00:53:26,640
Speaker 1: about a plunger. I'll try to run it. Let me

1057
00:53:26,680 --> 00:53:30,000
Speaker 1: say it with yeah, yeah, say it all right. So

1058
00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:34,200
Speaker 1: if you go, if you're taken a big look like

1059
00:53:34,280 --> 00:53:38,560
Speaker 1: a chimney sweep with that fucking or couldn't I be

1060
00:53:38,680 --> 00:53:40,840
Speaker 1: like some of your mouth like cockney style so? Or

1061
00:53:41,000 --> 00:53:44,879
Speaker 1: couldn't I be a lady in white lotus Italy? Yeah?

1062
00:53:45,080 --> 00:53:48,520
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, like front desk, like like in Paris. No,

1063
00:53:48,680 --> 00:53:50,680
Speaker 1: it does look it can look chic, depending on what

1064
00:53:50,840 --> 00:53:53,000
Speaker 1: accent you give it or what angle the camera looks like.

1065
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:55,640
Speaker 1: If you've taken a good big crap in the loop

1066
00:53:56,000 --> 00:53:59,560
Speaker 1: and you've got to get the toilet plunger of the brush,

1067
00:54:00,239 --> 00:54:02,680
Speaker 1: I'll just ask me dead, what do you guys do

1068
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:04,719
Speaker 1: to do you knock it off? Do you let it sit?

1069
00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:06,920
Speaker 1: I run it under the bath, or I'll run it

1070
00:54:07,040 --> 00:54:09,200
Speaker 1: under the sink. But even on its way from the

1071
00:54:09,239 --> 00:54:12,200
Speaker 1: toilet to the bath, there's a chance a droplet might fall.

1072
00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:16,840
Speaker 1: If that happens, then I will Sometimes I'll take toilet

1073
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:22,239
Speaker 1: paper under it to sort of like make sure I

1074
00:54:22,239 --> 00:54:24,600
Speaker 1: couldn't do it. Put it in a bag. Yeah, I

1075
00:54:24,719 --> 00:54:26,320
Speaker 1: put it in a bag because I don't just touched

1076
00:54:26,360 --> 00:54:29,120
Speaker 1: the floor. And then from the bag you put it

1077
00:54:29,160 --> 00:54:31,279
Speaker 1: like next because it has a little case next to

1078
00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:33,680
Speaker 1: the right, like, oh, that's the that's like a little plunger.

1079
00:54:33,719 --> 00:54:35,759
Speaker 1: I would put in a bag the brush and then

1080
00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:37,279
Speaker 1: you put the but then you put it in the

1081
00:54:37,320 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 1: bag like away in a closet or something. She burns it. Oh, yeah,

1082
00:54:41,719 --> 00:54:43,759
Speaker 1: the plunger doesn't stay next to the brush, is what

1083
00:54:43,840 --> 00:54:46,200
Speaker 1: goes in its little cubby. Yeah, goddamn it. Can you

1084
00:54:46,280 --> 00:54:48,840
Speaker 1: think of anything grosser than drinking something out of that cubby?

1085
00:54:49,040 --> 00:54:52,000
Speaker 1: Like putting in some liquid and then drink. I'm sorry,

1086
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:55,920
Speaker 1: did that make your vagina a wink? If you just

1087
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:58,839
Speaker 1: jumped off a building or did a bungee jump, it would.

1088
00:54:59,280 --> 00:55:02,200
Speaker 1: I noticed that rich people never have toilet blenders around,

1089
00:55:02,760 --> 00:55:04,360
Speaker 1: Like you just don't see it. It's not in the

1090
00:55:04,440 --> 00:55:07,319
Speaker 1: bed because are doing it. I have the help put

1091
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 1: their hands into the toilet thing. Um Okay, I think

1092
00:55:13,640 --> 00:55:16,120
Speaker 1: that's that's all I have for my reddits today. I

1093
00:55:16,239 --> 00:55:20,480
Speaker 1: need to save more, but I've been. Um, I've just

1094
00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:21,840
Speaker 1: been saving a lot of it. Like I have a

1095
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:23,640
Speaker 1: lot of stuff saved that is just Oh, there's this

1096
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:26,359
Speaker 1: one of this baby sloth being reunited with his mom,

1097
00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:28,840
Speaker 1: and I said, and I said it to the girl's tattoo.

1098
00:55:28,880 --> 00:55:32,640
Speaker 1: It's so good and so sweet, and like, I just

1099
00:55:32,760 --> 00:55:34,480
Speaker 1: hate all the noise that's happening around it. I don't

1100
00:55:34,480 --> 00:55:36,920
Speaker 1: think those two are gonna like survive long after this

1101
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:39,799
Speaker 1: video is taken. Like I don't trust humans around these things.

1102
00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:42,560
Speaker 1: Like I'm like, stop reding your engines when there's like

1103
00:55:42,600 --> 00:55:45,279
Speaker 1: a baby, a traumatized baby and its mom next to

1104
00:55:45,360 --> 00:55:47,960
Speaker 1: each other. But you could see that video somewhere, I

1105
00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:51,800
Speaker 1: mean just google it. But um, yeah, I U. We

1106
00:55:51,880 --> 00:55:53,920
Speaker 1: have a girl's trip actually coming up that we're very

1107
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:59,359
Speaker 1: excited about. And um, don't forget vacation before you get

1108
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:02,880
Speaker 1: into that. Why don't share your sudddits. Okay, yes, that's

1109
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 1: a good point, think you know, for keeping me on

1110
00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 1: track add today. Okay, If I were you, I would

1111
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:10,120
Speaker 1: join Reddit and I would follow are you ready get

1112
00:56:10,160 --> 00:56:13,760
Speaker 1: out your pen and paper? Um, depending on what decade

1113
00:56:13,760 --> 00:56:17,080
Speaker 1: you grew up in, Uh, it's the nineties or eighties,

1114
00:56:17,160 --> 00:56:20,879
Speaker 1: like the nine zero or eight zero, s seventies, whatever

1115
00:56:20,920 --> 00:56:23,880
Speaker 1: it is. Um, I would say, age like milk is

1116
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:26,640
Speaker 1: funny because those are things that like there was like

1117
00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:29,360
Speaker 1: people be making bold statements and then the opposite happened.

1118
00:56:29,440 --> 00:56:32,719
Speaker 1: An example of that would be, um, oh, it's like

1119
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:37,840
Speaker 1: Andrew Tate saying this, you're a man. If the police

1120
00:56:37,920 --> 00:56:47,359
Speaker 1: forensically analyze your life, you've done something pretty much as

1121
00:56:47,400 --> 00:56:50,160
Speaker 1: Andrew Tait saying if if you're being investigated, you've done

1122
00:56:50,200 --> 00:56:53,480
Speaker 1: something wrong, and it aged like milk, because yes, okay,

1123
00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:57,799
Speaker 1: So then um, there's amateur room porn. That's just really

1124
00:56:57,920 --> 00:57:01,400
Speaker 1: nice rooms. Animals being bros, animals being jerks. Um, a

1125
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:03,719
Speaker 1: normal day in Russia, and we'll just have some video

1126
00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:06,360
Speaker 1: of some bizarre shit happening in Russia that you're just like,

1127
00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:09,520
Speaker 1: what the fuck? Like a dog, like a guy walking

1128
00:57:09,560 --> 00:57:11,560
Speaker 1: his dog and his bear down the street and no

1129
00:57:11,600 --> 00:57:13,279
Speaker 1: one's making a big deal of it. Like that's normal

1130
00:57:13,360 --> 00:57:19,840
Speaker 1: day in Russia. Ask women, Ask redditum at bge which

1131
00:57:19,920 --> 00:57:22,760
Speaker 1: is awful taste but great execution. So it's like design

1132
00:57:22,880 --> 00:57:25,040
Speaker 1: things that are like, oh my god, that's so tacky,

1133
00:57:25,160 --> 00:57:28,800
Speaker 1: but it like obviously a lot of work went into it. Um.

1134
00:57:29,640 --> 00:57:32,840
Speaker 1: Then there's one the black people Twitter is always funny.

1135
00:57:32,880 --> 00:57:35,600
Speaker 1: It's not I don't even know it's there's not tweets

1136
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:39,200
Speaker 1: about being black. It's just like the funny black people's tweets. Um,

1137
00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:43,360
Speaker 1: White people Twitter isn't that bad either, um, Ask women,

1138
00:57:43,760 --> 00:57:48,240
Speaker 1: ah aw ww, be amazed. That's just shows like crazy

1139
00:57:48,440 --> 00:57:50,840
Speaker 1: amazing things. Better every loop that'll be like a jif

1140
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:53,440
Speaker 1: that just goes on repeat, and like any every time

1141
00:57:53,440 --> 00:57:54,920
Speaker 1: you watch it over and over, it gets better and

1142
00:57:55,040 --> 00:57:57,920
Speaker 1: funnier and weirder, And then people in the comments like argue,

1143
00:57:58,000 --> 00:58:01,960
Speaker 1: like why it gets funnier? Like this, the idea that

1144
00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:05,720
Speaker 1: this repeats it makes this video better, like, and people

1145
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:07,480
Speaker 1: are really like, get this video off. It doesn't get

1146
00:58:07,520 --> 00:58:09,720
Speaker 1: better every loop. Like. People are very like staunch about

1147
00:58:09,760 --> 00:58:12,880
Speaker 1: what makes it books? Oh my god, I get so.

1148
00:58:13,080 --> 00:58:15,200
Speaker 1: I'm not even a voracious reader, but I get so

1149
00:58:15,360 --> 00:58:17,760
Speaker 1: many good recommendations on books because people are constantly asking

1150
00:58:17,840 --> 00:58:19,960
Speaker 1: questions like what book would I like if I like

1151
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:22,920
Speaker 1: this stuff? Or like what or like, what are the

1152
00:58:22,920 --> 00:58:24,320
Speaker 1: best books you've ever read in your life? It's a

1153
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:26,600
Speaker 1: good place to start for things like that. I've finished Spare,

1154
00:58:27,320 --> 00:58:31,280
Speaker 1: oh yeay, and by the Prince Harry. I've finished Spare

1155
00:58:31,360 --> 00:58:34,320
Speaker 1: by Prince Harry, and I get it what you're talking about.

1156
00:58:34,560 --> 00:58:37,720
Speaker 1: I cannot believe how much the royal family lied and

1157
00:58:37,840 --> 00:58:41,120
Speaker 1: threw him under the bus to have protect him. I

1158
00:58:41,200 --> 00:58:43,680
Speaker 1: can't believe all the stuff they went through. I mean,

1159
00:58:44,280 --> 00:58:48,320
Speaker 1: it's insane. He really exposes a lot of stuff, which

1160
00:58:48,320 --> 00:58:50,320
Speaker 1: I think that book was the only way he could

1161
00:58:50,360 --> 00:58:52,320
Speaker 1: get his true word out because they would sign, they

1162
00:58:52,320 --> 00:58:56,560
Speaker 1: would plagiarize documents that he made, supposed statements. He never made,

1163
00:58:56,920 --> 00:58:59,960
Speaker 1: ye say that it was from him. No, we don't.

1164
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:01,440
Speaker 1: We don't know so much of what went on and

1165
00:59:01,520 --> 00:59:03,720
Speaker 1: if you have like a cursory understanding and you think

1166
00:59:03,760 --> 00:59:05,280
Speaker 1: you know, you just don't know. And I think you

1167
00:59:05,360 --> 00:59:08,120
Speaker 1: just need to read that book to fully understand that

1168
00:59:08,360 --> 00:59:11,040
Speaker 1: they were were victims. They didn't want any of this.

1169
00:59:11,200 --> 00:59:13,240
Speaker 1: They were trying to do good. Megan Markle is not

1170
00:59:13,400 --> 00:59:17,080
Speaker 1: a little like conniving bad person. You know, you all

1171
00:59:17,160 --> 00:59:18,680
Speaker 1: know my feelings. But I'm glad that you liked it,

1172
00:59:18,720 --> 00:59:22,120
Speaker 1: and thanks for reading it. On your final thought listening

1173
00:59:22,160 --> 00:59:24,920
Speaker 1: to Spare, was it good to like? How is his

1174
00:59:25,560 --> 00:59:30,840
Speaker 1: audio version? ASMR like such a soft force? Can I

1175
00:59:30,920 --> 00:59:34,440
Speaker 1: say so? Fall asleep to it? Yeah? Quick? So we

1176
00:59:34,560 --> 00:59:36,640
Speaker 1: were talking about captions before, and I wanted to let

1177
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:39,560
Speaker 1: you know that I like captions because one they keep

1178
00:59:39,640 --> 00:59:42,920
Speaker 1: me focused and paying attention, and two I have to

1179
00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:46,240
Speaker 1: have captions because it's hard for me to understand British accents.

1180
00:59:46,520 --> 00:59:51,200
Speaker 1: So I would watch a lot of Horses, which is

1181
00:59:51,240 --> 00:59:53,760
Speaker 1: a great show. You absolutely have to have captions because

1182
00:59:53,840 --> 00:59:56,360
Speaker 1: there's so much weird slang you've never heard of. They're

1183
00:59:56,400 --> 01:00:02,280
Speaker 1: like plunge pa, I would it's constant, like the Welsh

1184
01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:06,080
Speaker 1: accent also is hard for me. Yeah, accents are hard. Um.

1185
01:00:06,200 --> 01:00:09,040
Speaker 1: The one show that really paid off for me was um,

1186
01:00:10,400 --> 01:00:13,840
Speaker 1: normal people remember that one? That one was really good?

1187
01:00:14,080 --> 01:00:16,200
Speaker 1: What other TV have you guys been watching that's been great?

1188
01:00:16,240 --> 01:00:19,600
Speaker 1: Anything we should wreck? I want? I can't wait for

1189
01:00:19,880 --> 01:00:21,760
Speaker 1: the New Succession to come out. I was just thinking

1190
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:24,880
Speaker 1: that was into that show. Yeah, I would rewatch that

1191
01:00:24,920 --> 01:00:27,200
Speaker 1: whole thing and we'd watch all of Veep. I've been

1192
01:00:27,240 --> 01:00:33,240
Speaker 1: watching Jason Sudeikis. What is it called shrinking? Um? That's

1193
01:00:33,280 --> 01:00:38,840
Speaker 1: not Seagull? Yes? I have you watched how many episodes

1194
01:00:38,840 --> 01:00:40,280
Speaker 1: are out out? Because I watched the first two. I

1195
01:00:40,400 --> 01:00:42,280
Speaker 1: know that they're more, but I gotta get back into

1196
01:00:42,320 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 1: it because I did like the first two so far. Nice.

1197
01:00:46,040 --> 01:00:48,439
Speaker 1: If you like Ted Lasso, you'll like it. It's the same,

1198
01:00:48,520 --> 01:00:51,400
Speaker 1: it's so it's the same Bill Lawrence created it. It's

1199
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,760
Speaker 1: the same vibe it said Lasso. For sure. It's heartwarming.

1200
01:00:53,840 --> 01:00:57,080
Speaker 1: It's funny. Um, it's funny though, because that show and

1201
01:00:57,560 --> 01:00:59,640
Speaker 1: The Last of Us are about like someone who has

1202
01:00:59,680 --> 01:01:02,320
Speaker 1: like a daughter that they're trying to like win over

1203
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:05,160
Speaker 1: and like protect and like it's a lot there's a

1204
01:01:05,200 --> 01:01:08,640
Speaker 1: lot of daughter stuff going on and death looming, just

1205
01:01:08,760 --> 01:01:12,080
Speaker 1: like there's a death looming in that show. Oh yes, yes, yes,

1206
01:01:12,200 --> 01:01:14,040
Speaker 1: I'm guessing. I don't know about that part yet, but

1207
01:01:14,200 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 1: I'm guessing who it is. Um, you can follow jifts.

1208
01:01:17,680 --> 01:01:21,240
Speaker 1: You can follow Goodwill fines. That's a good one. Goodwill

1209
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:24,960
Speaker 1: underscore fines. It's really good for Julie. Yeah. Yeah, and

1210
01:01:25,080 --> 01:01:27,560
Speaker 1: sometimes the center things. She's like, oh, I've seen that before,

1211
01:01:27,680 --> 01:01:35,120
Speaker 1: not a big deal. Um, you can follow Codependency Columbine

1212
01:01:35,200 --> 01:01:39,160
Speaker 1: Columbine Killers. Oh wait, don't do that. That's comedy Cemetery

1213
01:01:39,360 --> 01:01:41,960
Speaker 1: is like really lame comp like jokes that you know,

1214
01:01:42,040 --> 01:01:44,440
Speaker 1: aunts and uncles are posting on Facebook, just like where

1215
01:01:44,520 --> 01:01:46,480
Speaker 1: comedy goes to die is. It's like, you know, a

1216
01:01:46,520 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 1: little interruption. Yesterday we watched Okay, so I mean and

1217
01:01:49,680 --> 01:01:51,640
Speaker 1: I We've been going to this place called Bookman's and

1218
01:01:51,680 --> 01:01:54,440
Speaker 1: they have a lot of like used old DVD so

1219
01:01:54,520 --> 01:01:57,000
Speaker 1: we've just been buying a bunch of stuff, and we

1220
01:01:57,120 --> 01:02:00,200
Speaker 1: bought the movie Freddie Got Fingered. And I remember were

1221
01:02:00,240 --> 01:02:03,000
Speaker 1: like that movie being like the thing that everyone talked about,

1222
01:02:03,040 --> 01:02:05,480
Speaker 1: everyone quoted from it, and I watched I was like,

1223
01:02:05,560 --> 01:02:10,680
Speaker 1: this is so stupid. I just don't understand. Wait a second, no,

1224
01:02:10,880 --> 01:02:12,840
Speaker 1: I never saw it either. They so they changed it.

1225
01:02:13,320 --> 01:02:16,320
Speaker 1: Freddy gofffingered is with Tom Green. It's like I don't

1226
01:02:16,360 --> 01:02:19,960
Speaker 1: know from early two thy late nineties, yes, and I

1227
01:02:20,120 --> 01:02:22,640
Speaker 1: just like watching it today, I was just like, I

1228
01:02:22,720 --> 01:02:26,840
Speaker 1: don't this is this was comedy. That was a really

1229
01:02:26,920 --> 01:02:29,120
Speaker 1: bad movie, I think even then, and I think that

1230
01:02:29,160 --> 01:02:30,840
Speaker 1: it was going to be a cult classic and like

1231
01:02:30,960 --> 01:02:33,240
Speaker 1: people liked it for them. But it's that is the

1232
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:37,400
Speaker 1: interesting thing about like movies like that, like things that

1233
01:02:37,440 --> 01:02:40,400
Speaker 1: you go back and you go even Chris has been saying, like,

1234
01:02:41,560 --> 01:02:44,360
Speaker 1: in preparation for his Adam Sandler show, he's been watching

1235
01:02:44,400 --> 01:02:46,400
Speaker 1: a lot of SNL clips and they have like a

1236
01:02:46,440 --> 01:02:48,920
Speaker 1: bunch of Australians on their team who are working on

1237
01:02:49,320 --> 01:02:52,400
Speaker 1: or like a guy a South African guy who didn't

1238
01:02:52,440 --> 01:02:54,439
Speaker 1: grow up with Sandler stuff. So he's trying to educate

1239
01:02:54,480 --> 01:02:56,240
Speaker 1: everyone who's working on this event like this is who

1240
01:02:56,280 --> 01:02:58,280
Speaker 1: Sandler was. So they're going back and watching you know what,

1241
01:02:58,360 --> 01:02:59,680
Speaker 1: we might as well put on this clip. It's all

1242
01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:02,520
Speaker 1: let's go for like watch SNL. And he told me,

1243
01:03:02,560 --> 01:03:06,520
Speaker 1: he's like, none of this is really hidden the way

1244
01:03:06,560 --> 01:03:09,400
Speaker 1: it did that I remember it did. It's all so long.

1245
01:03:10,320 --> 01:03:12,640
Speaker 1: He's like, and the things you remember as a kid

1246
01:03:12,720 --> 01:03:14,400
Speaker 1: being like that was the best. It was like one

1247
01:03:14,640 --> 01:03:18,080
Speaker 1: line from that sketch and the rest is like brutal.

1248
01:03:18,520 --> 01:03:22,320
Speaker 1: We were so deprived of entertainment at the time. But

1249
01:03:22,480 --> 01:03:24,680
Speaker 1: it's like, but even now, I mean, I look back

1250
01:03:24,720 --> 01:03:27,480
Speaker 1: at my old stand up and I'm like, that wouldn't

1251
01:03:28,160 --> 01:03:30,920
Speaker 1: like we have a large In some ways, I think

1252
01:03:30,960 --> 01:03:33,280
Speaker 1: the bar is so low. I mean, I saw a

1253
01:03:33,400 --> 01:03:35,600
Speaker 1: movie not too long ago that I wanted to walk

1254
01:03:35,640 --> 01:03:37,600
Speaker 1: out of the theater but I couldn't because I didn't

1255
01:03:37,600 --> 01:03:42,360
Speaker 1: want to get canceled because it was so comedically not

1256
01:03:42,600 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 1: giving me what I thought like. I was just I

1257
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:48,320
Speaker 1: was insulted. It was like what Fox would give you

1258
01:03:48,520 --> 01:03:50,880
Speaker 1: for comedy on like, you know, it's like the mass

1259
01:03:50,920 --> 01:03:53,840
Speaker 1: singer levels of comedy. I thought, like, this is just like,

1260
01:03:54,800 --> 01:03:57,000
Speaker 1: you know, family style. It was just not like which

1261
01:03:57,080 --> 01:03:59,000
Speaker 1: is fine and that has a place like not everything

1262
01:03:59,080 --> 01:04:03,000
Speaker 1: needs to be like sharp cutting comedy. But I was

1263
01:04:03,080 --> 01:04:05,840
Speaker 1: just like, so sometimes I can be so disappointed and

1264
01:04:05,840 --> 01:04:07,760
Speaker 1: then I go see Adam Sandler live and I'm like, Okay,

1265
01:04:07,880 --> 01:04:10,080
Speaker 1: comedy is alive, and well like this is so fucking

1266
01:04:10,320 --> 01:04:14,080
Speaker 1: like nothing's funnier than this right now. But then also

1267
01:04:14,280 --> 01:04:17,520
Speaker 1: I just I've said it before. I just watch watching

1268
01:04:17,640 --> 01:04:20,320
Speaker 1: even some Chris and I are watching Seinfeld's again Seinfeld

1269
01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:24,360
Speaker 1: and Veep, Like Seinfeld holds up Veep, you can't. How

1270
01:04:24,440 --> 01:04:26,400
Speaker 1: can you make a comedy and compare it to those

1271
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:28,720
Speaker 1: two things and be okay with yourself if it doesn't

1272
01:04:28,760 --> 01:04:32,280
Speaker 1: even come close. It just I don't even people's confidence

1273
01:04:32,320 --> 01:04:34,960
Speaker 1: in making movies. People that make movies and they like

1274
01:04:35,200 --> 01:04:38,200
Speaker 1: if they aren't as good. I understand being a novice

1275
01:04:38,320 --> 01:04:39,640
Speaker 1: at something and being like, it's not going to be

1276
01:04:39,680 --> 01:04:42,040
Speaker 1: as good as this I'm trying. But people who confidently

1277
01:04:42,120 --> 01:04:45,880
Speaker 1: put out things that are going to be tried in

1278
01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:48,920
Speaker 1: a court of public opinion on the same level. That's

1279
01:04:48,960 --> 01:04:51,680
Speaker 1: why HBO you can count on them. They're not fucking

1280
01:04:51,720 --> 01:04:54,400
Speaker 1: around on HBO. They're not letting in riff raff. They

1281
01:04:54,440 --> 01:04:57,640
Speaker 1: have they have taste, they have a level of that

1282
01:04:57,880 --> 01:05:00,560
Speaker 1: you say what you want about all the streamers, HBO

1283
01:05:00,640 --> 01:05:03,800
Speaker 1: has a level of taste comedically, I believe, and just

1284
01:05:03,920 --> 01:05:07,360
Speaker 1: with their quality of shows. They're they're spending the money,

1285
01:05:07,480 --> 01:05:11,440
Speaker 1: they're they're taking wide swings, but it's always quality and

1286
01:05:11,760 --> 01:05:14,840
Speaker 1: um and I just feel like and even I, you know,

1287
01:05:15,080 --> 01:05:17,640
Speaker 1: comedically take an easy way out when I could go

1288
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:21,240
Speaker 1: you know, I don't do the hard work to get

1289
01:05:21,280 --> 01:05:22,960
Speaker 1: at the best joke, and I take I do a

1290
01:05:23,080 --> 01:05:26,880
Speaker 1: lesser version. But I don't know. I just um, Yeah,

1291
01:05:27,280 --> 01:05:29,360
Speaker 1: stuff doesn't hold up as much anymore because there is

1292
01:05:29,440 --> 01:05:32,960
Speaker 1: so much good stuff now. To compare yourself to Freddy

1293
01:05:33,000 --> 01:05:35,480
Speaker 1: got Finger doesn't stand a chance. You know what other

1294
01:05:35,560 --> 01:05:38,120
Speaker 1: movie always gets that's so funny? You try to be nostalgic,

1295
01:05:38,200 --> 01:05:41,800
Speaker 1: And it was just like, oh, maybe we should watch

1296
01:05:41,840 --> 01:05:44,760
Speaker 1: it just for kicks. What about step Brothers? People are

1297
01:05:44,760 --> 01:05:47,800
Speaker 1: always like quoting stuff that's that's that probably holds up.

1298
01:05:48,000 --> 01:05:51,439
Speaker 1: I gotta say, I've tried watching it twice, and every

1299
01:05:51,480 --> 01:05:53,480
Speaker 1: time I'm like, it's not for me. I don't know

1300
01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:56,680
Speaker 1: why I cannot. I want to get the joke so bad,

1301
01:05:56,760 --> 01:05:58,720
Speaker 1: but it just doesn't really get the joke. They're just

1302
01:05:58,840 --> 01:06:01,440
Speaker 1: not make and you laugh. You're not like, what's the

1303
01:06:01,560 --> 01:06:03,360
Speaker 1: joke there? I mean, the joke is that these two

1304
01:06:03,760 --> 01:06:07,320
Speaker 1: adult men are behaving like seven year olds. Yeah. Maybe

1305
01:06:07,400 --> 01:06:09,640
Speaker 1: it's the same thing with Super Bad. When I saw that,

1306
01:06:09,760 --> 01:06:13,240
Speaker 1: I was like, I could easily take I could leave this,

1307
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:17,240
Speaker 1: I could be interesting. Yeah, well, I get I love

1308
01:06:17,360 --> 01:06:20,720
Speaker 1: those two that you just said, but I people love

1309
01:06:20,840 --> 01:06:25,200
Speaker 1: Horrible Bosses people love And when I saw that movie,

1310
01:06:25,280 --> 01:06:28,960
Speaker 1: I was disgusted. That is that Anniston and Sandler, Yeah,

1311
01:06:29,200 --> 01:06:33,200
Speaker 1: none of those Anniston, Charlie Day. Yeah, I mean I

1312
01:06:33,240 --> 01:06:35,400
Speaker 1: would kill to be in that movie or be associated

1313
01:06:35,400 --> 01:06:38,000
Speaker 1: with it in any way. And I don't know, disrespect

1314
01:06:38,040 --> 01:06:39,640
Speaker 1: to the people who made it, but it was unwatched.

1315
01:06:39,680 --> 01:06:43,880
Speaker 1: It was insulting, insulting. But the thing is, if I

1316
01:06:44,000 --> 01:06:47,400
Speaker 1: made those movies, those movies probably started out fucking hilarious.

1317
01:06:47,840 --> 01:06:52,760
Speaker 1: The scripts were probably top tier jokes every second. But

1318
01:06:53,080 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 1: people are dumb and studios want to make money, and

1319
01:06:55,920 --> 01:06:59,040
Speaker 1: if you don't want to alienate, not everyone's gonna watch Veep.

1320
01:06:59,520 --> 01:07:03,880
Speaker 1: It's too fast, it's two, it's too I don't want

1321
01:07:03,920 --> 01:07:05,640
Speaker 1: to say intellectual, because I don't want to pat myself

1322
01:07:05,640 --> 01:07:07,360
Speaker 1: on the back. But it's like, if you want to

1323
01:07:07,400 --> 01:07:08,720
Speaker 1: make if you want to make a lot of money,

1324
01:07:08,800 --> 01:07:13,560
Speaker 1: make things easy to consume. Slow slow, My mom cannot

1325
01:07:13,600 --> 01:07:16,640
Speaker 1: get through me. She's slow down, Please rewind. What did

1326
01:07:16,720 --> 01:07:18,960
Speaker 1: she say? It's like, forget it. This shows not for

1327
01:07:19,200 --> 01:07:22,480
Speaker 1: Russian moms that are eighty Yeah. I mean there's a

1328
01:07:22,600 --> 01:07:25,440
Speaker 1: time and a place U. Yeah, whenever your parents have

1329
01:07:25,520 --> 01:07:26,840
Speaker 1: to come to my show. I'm boys like do they

1330
01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:31,400
Speaker 1: have can they leave? Like this isn't says my dad's

1331
01:07:31,400 --> 01:07:33,640
Speaker 1: still just at lunch the other day is like, man,

1332
01:07:33,960 --> 01:07:37,920
Speaker 1: Nicky Glazer is fucking genius. Man, Well that's mind. He

1333
01:07:38,000 --> 01:07:42,280
Speaker 1: swears a lot whenever he's talking about you. Well, I'm

1334
01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:44,360
Speaker 1: not for everyone, and that's okay. Like, I think I

1335
01:07:44,440 --> 01:07:46,160
Speaker 1: have to get okay with that, because someone this weekend

1336
01:07:46,280 --> 01:07:49,040
Speaker 1: was like, you were so great. One of the caterers

1337
01:07:49,120 --> 01:07:50,600
Speaker 1: or one of the waiters were like, oh my god,

1338
01:07:50,640 --> 01:07:52,120
Speaker 1: I love you so much. I'm such a big fan

1339
01:07:52,160 --> 01:07:55,200
Speaker 1: of he goes, oh my god. The mayor and her

1340
01:07:55,360 --> 01:07:57,920
Speaker 1: and her husband walked out and discussed like as soon

1341
01:07:57,960 --> 01:08:00,520
Speaker 1: as you got on stage, and I was like, my

1342
01:08:00,600 --> 01:08:03,400
Speaker 1: first joke was about like having a dry pussy like that.

1343
01:08:03,520 --> 01:08:05,400
Speaker 1: I think that was about it. And I'm like, no

1344
01:08:05,560 --> 01:08:07,920
Speaker 1: one has a dryer pussy than that. Mare Like she

1345
01:08:08,120 --> 01:08:10,160
Speaker 1: was so triggered by that, and especially she's the fucking

1346
01:08:10,200 --> 01:08:12,360
Speaker 1: mayor of Las Vegas. She is the dry I mean,

1347
01:08:12,640 --> 01:08:16,479
Speaker 1: is it's it's just it's it's hell there. I I

1348
01:08:16,560 --> 01:08:18,320
Speaker 1: don't there has to be some kind of like lotion

1349
01:08:18,439 --> 01:08:20,639
Speaker 1: bath that you can go and get on every corner

1350
01:08:20,720 --> 01:08:24,240
Speaker 1: there because I was so scaly when I was there.

1351
01:08:25,080 --> 01:08:28,320
Speaker 1: Lube was just like nice, dry like it was start

1352
01:08:28,400 --> 01:08:34,160
Speaker 1: that make money while you're sleeping, I think. And and

1353
01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:38,200
Speaker 1: you know the eye eyebrow, our eyelashes that pull up

1354
01:08:38,280 --> 01:08:40,640
Speaker 1: your eyelid and make you look like you've that you

1355
01:08:40,800 --> 01:08:43,080
Speaker 1: just got some horrible news. All right, guys, thank you

1356
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:44,960
Speaker 1: for listening to the show. We will be here for

1357
01:08:45,080 --> 01:08:47,599
Speaker 1: you tomorrow. Don't even think we won't um on tour

1358
01:08:47,760 --> 01:08:54,280
Speaker 1: this weekend in Bloomington, Indiana, Newport, Kentucky, and uh Lex,

1359
01:08:55,000 --> 01:08:57,240
Speaker 1: Kentucky all this weekend. So if you in the since

1360
01:08:57,600 --> 01:08:59,519
Speaker 1: Cincinnati area, the Newport show is the one you're gonna

1361
01:08:59,520 --> 01:09:01,240
Speaker 1: want to go do. You can get tickets at the

1362
01:09:01,320 --> 01:09:03,160
Speaker 1: gi Glazer dot com. I'll see you out there. New Merch.

1363
01:09:03,240 --> 01:09:05,320
Speaker 1: Anya's wearing it right now. Check it out on YouTube

1364
01:09:05,360 --> 01:09:07,240
Speaker 1: if you want to see my new merch shirt. I

1365
01:09:07,320 --> 01:09:09,200
Speaker 1: love that shirt so much. Looks like I'm having an

1366
01:09:09,280 --> 01:09:11,479
Speaker 1: orgasm kind of, but I don't mind it. And we'll

1367
01:09:11,520 --> 01:09:15,439
Speaker 1: see Anya in her new smile tomorrow. I guess yeah,

1368
01:09:15,560 --> 01:09:17,519
Speaker 1: I can't wait. We'll see that, all right, guys, Thanks

1369
01:09:17,520 --> 01:09:24,360
Speaker 1: for listening. Don't be kitt Area Plungja Ja Plung ja