Speaker 1: Hi, miss up. What's up? Okay, this is reasonably shay dude.
Speaker 1: I am Jaseelle Bryant. What's up?
Speaker 2: What's up? I am Robin Dixon. Thank you so much
Speaker 2: for joining us for our third episode.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I think we must be doing something right, Robin,
Speaker 1: it's getting scary. We are.
Speaker 2: And guess what what? We pressed record? Yes, and we
Speaker 2: are recording. Yes, everything that we're saying. So last episode. Yeah,
Speaker 2: we talked for like over ten minutes.
Speaker 1: And Robin because it's her job to press record. Okay, fine,
Speaker 1: it might be mine. Who knows if that didn't press it.
Speaker 2: This is a collaborative effort. Okay, all right, all right.
Speaker 2: It takes two Green Eye bandits to press record, all.
Speaker 1: Right now, yes it does. But guess what, we will
Speaker 1: never make that wrong a mistake again?
Speaker 2: Oh no, because I was ready to quit, like I
Speaker 2: was like, okay, my our podcast days are over.
Speaker 1: Oh gosh. All right, so we have a wonderful like
Speaker 1: we have a like explosive kind of episode tonight.
Speaker 2: Yes, this is a fun topic. I think I know
Speaker 2: you and I have a lot of input on it.
Speaker 2: I know our listeners are going to be right there
Speaker 2: with us. Yes, Yes, agreeing, having you know, same shared experiences,
Speaker 2: all that good stuff.
Speaker 1: Yes, And the topic tonight is or I don't know
Speaker 1: if it's tonight, but the topic for this episode is, hey, girlfriend,
Speaker 1: we're talking all things girlfriend. We're talking do we like them?
Speaker 1: Do we hate them? Do we need new friends? We're
Speaker 1: getting into it, we get into the girlfriend scenario.
Speaker 2: Yes, because you know what, it's so weird, like it
Speaker 2: doesn't matter how old we are.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's still like.
Speaker 2: Navigating the friendship world. It's still kind of awkward, you know.
Speaker 2: You find out that, like, Okay, it doesn't matter how
Speaker 2: old we are, people still have issues saying we still
Speaker 2: need to be sensitive towards them.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yes, But before we get into the episode,
Speaker 1: of course, we have our reasonably shady moment of the week.
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna go first, okay, And since the topic
Speaker 2: is about girlfriends, yes, friends, this is going to be
Speaker 2: centered around that. So so my reasonably shady moment goes
Speaker 2: to myself, of course, and it's because I actually picked
Speaker 2: up the phone, okay and called two of my friends,
Speaker 2: you know, like nowadays, like you know, we just text,
Speaker 2: you know, you might say, you know, hey, g are
Speaker 2: you look cute on Instagram or something, but like you
Speaker 2: don't really pick up the phone that much and talk
Speaker 2: to your friends these days, or certain ones or certain
Speaker 2: friends with that talk all the time, like you and I,
Speaker 2: yeah we talk all the time, right right, So this
Speaker 2: is where the shady part comes in now.
Speaker 1: Because I was confused. You just pick up the phone
Speaker 1: call on your girlfriends. When is the shake coming in?
Speaker 2: The shady part is it was like thirty seconds into
Speaker 2: the call and I'm like, see, you know this why
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: Call because they was talking about nothing.
Speaker 2: They was just a whining and a complaining, and it's like,
Speaker 2: oh god, now I know why I don't call or
Speaker 2: why I don't pick the phone up instantly. So you know, okay,
Speaker 2: along those same lines, So you have some friends when
Speaker 2: they call, You're like, okay, let me see what she want.
Speaker 2: I'm gonnack, I'm gonna pick up because you know she's
Speaker 2: calling for a reason, right, or it's gonna be like
Speaker 2: you know, you're gonna have a good conversation. Okay, girl,
Speaker 2: let's talk about this man, bad bad man. I'm off.
Speaker 2: Then there's other friends that call and you're like, lord,
Speaker 2: what does she want? I'm gonna god, I don't got time.
Speaker 2: I can't do it right now. I'm cooking dinner. She's
Speaker 2: gonna distract me. I'm trying to like, no, this is
Speaker 2: this is that. Those are the ones that you call
Speaker 2: when you're in the car, like when you're driving long
Speaker 2: distances and you're like, okay, who can I call and
Speaker 2: you're like, let me call her from back. So I'm
Speaker 2: in the car. I call her back, okay, and I'm
Speaker 2: just like, why.
Speaker 1: So did you lie to her and make it an
Speaker 1: excuse to get off the phone?
Speaker 2: No? And see that And this is the reasonable part.
Speaker 2: I am a good friend, and I know sometimes my
Speaker 2: friends just want me to listen okay, or you know,
Speaker 2: they just want to hear my voice, or they want
Speaker 2: to hear that I care, and I do care. But
Speaker 2: there's just the limit where I'm like, okay, enough enough,
Speaker 2: it's enough.
Speaker 1: Well Shady Gazelle would have been like, girl, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I gotta go. I got a flat tire, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I gotta go.
Speaker 2: It was actually when we went to the music video
Speaker 2: that we were at Yes, that's okay, right, who okay,
Speaker 2: that was a good hour and a half. Wow, yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, all.
Speaker 1: Right, So my reasonably shady. Moment of the week is okay.
Speaker 1: So I am a huge proponent of getting rid of
Speaker 1: this thing called COVID. So I got myself a little
Speaker 1: appointment and I got my first shot. My back scene
Speaker 1: is in my arm, and I am mad at the
Speaker 1: entire world. Why because everybody said in itself, your arm
Speaker 1: is gonna hurt a little bit, but you're gonna be good. No,
Speaker 1: Giselle was flat on her back, Okay, I was. I
Speaker 1: was on my death I had chills fever, I was shaking.
Speaker 1: My kids were looking over me like, MOI are you
Speaker 1: going to be okay? And I was really not prepared
Speaker 1: for what came with that first shot. Now am I
Speaker 1: getting the second shot?
Speaker 2: Of course? I am right that.
Speaker 1: Do I think everybody should be vaccinated? Yes, I do.
Speaker 1: But I just want to say the world is shady
Speaker 1: because y'all lied to me about the symptoms and the
Speaker 1: side effects.
Speaker 2: I mean I heard some people say they have side effects.
Speaker 2: You hear it all, Oh it's not that bad, Oh
Speaker 2: my arm okay? Or I was tired, I couldn't get
Speaker 2: out of bed all day.
Speaker 1: Yes, well for me, it was bad, and I just
Speaker 1: want people to know that it can be.
Speaker 2: Bad, right, yes, because I think if they don't know that,
Speaker 2: then they think like, oh my god, this thing's going
Speaker 2: to kill me, or you know, I knew I shouldn't
Speaker 2: have taken it, or you know, something's wrong. So yeah,
Speaker 2: it probably is good for them to tell you, like,
Speaker 2: this thing is not going to be easy.
Speaker 1: Now I did, after I got to shot, go out
Speaker 1: and have drinks. That's a whole nother story, and we
Speaker 1: don't need to talk about that anyway. Let's move into
Speaker 1: the episode.
Speaker 2: Is that in the rule?
Speaker 1: Is there a rule or something? Listen, Okay, it is
Speaker 1: time to start this episode in which we're going to
Speaker 1: talk about our girlfriends. Hey girlfriend girl, how you doing? Okay? So,
Speaker 1: first and foremost, at this point in time in our lives,
Speaker 1: are we Drake? Do we need new friends?
Speaker 2: No new friends? How's it going? No new friends? No
Speaker 2: new friends?
Speaker 1: I can't remember how it goes either rhyb and sing
Speaker 1: the wrong song right now? Okay? So I do appreciate,
Speaker 1: for instance, you and I, Robin we met later in life.
Speaker 1: We did, and if I had the thought in my
Speaker 1: head okay, no new friends, then our friendship would not
Speaker 1: have happened.
Speaker 2: So true.
Speaker 1: Okay, So I don't want to block myself from new
Speaker 1: people that are coming into my life. You never know
Speaker 1: why God is sending somebody into your life, so I
Speaker 1: never want to do that. However, these women out here
Speaker 1: are crazy, right.
Speaker 2: I think the older we get, the more you know,
Speaker 2: well set in the ways people are, the more like
Speaker 2: and especially if they've experienced some things. It's weird. Like
Speaker 2: I keep thinking, like, oh, it's as adults, you should realize,
Speaker 2: like you know, life is like a box of chocolates,
Speaker 2: and you know, you get tougher and you just kind
Speaker 2: of roll with the punches. But some people let everything
Speaker 2: they go through like scar them, and then they become
Speaker 2: more pressed to like impress people or you know, it's
Speaker 2: like this this crazy need to keep up with the
Speaker 2: joneses and to make sure that you are like, you know,
Speaker 2: the baddest one and or you know whatever. It is
Speaker 2: like competing with people, and I think that's when we
Speaker 2: have a problem. But I find and it's you know,
Speaker 2: this is crazy. I never thought I would say this,
Speaker 2: but like I'm making friends with like the sports moms
Speaker 2: that I hang out with, you know, from your kids,
Speaker 2: from your kids teams, right, football teams, Yeah, baskets and
Speaker 2: it's like, because those are women that I spend a
Speaker 2: lot of time with, right, and y'all have something in common,
Speaker 2: which is the game that your kids are playing, right,
Speaker 2: exactly our kids. Our kids might become friends, and but
Speaker 2: it's something it's like, it's funny because you're like, Okay,
Speaker 2: when I was growing up, but I've made friends with
Speaker 2: this person or of what I've been friends with this
Speaker 2: person in college. Not necessarily like you wouldn't have chosen
Speaker 2: to be that be friends with some of these people,
Speaker 2: but because you're around them all the time, you're communicating
Speaker 2: with them all the time, you end up you know,
Speaker 2: like you know, I kind of share before in a
Speaker 2: hotel room drinking all night with.
Speaker 1: People, and that was episode one. If y'all miss that
Speaker 1: Robin drinks with these women that she meets and they're
Speaker 1: in hotel rooms and they don't make it to the
Speaker 1: games the next day to see their kids play.
Speaker 2: We do, but do like with the one eye open,
Speaker 2: they're delirious.
Speaker 1: They have no idea what's happening. Okay, So another question
Speaker 1: is when you meet these new people, do you google them?
Speaker 2: Well, it depends, Okay, I feel like when you meet
Speaker 2: someone that is that comes in the room and is
Speaker 2: talking about what they do and who they are, and
Speaker 2: what they have and what their man has, and right
Speaker 2: where they live. Then yeah, I'm googling you, yes, right,
Speaker 2: and I'm googling your house address.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, okay, I'm not going that far. But I
Speaker 1: kind of feel like if you're in my personal space
Speaker 1: and potentially in my intimate setting, right, I don't know
Speaker 1: what's gonna happen. The cops might come. I don't know
Speaker 1: if you if you're a drug dealer girlfriend, if you
Speaker 1: had a criminal background and all of a sudden the
Speaker 1: Feds caught up with you, Like, I don't want to
Speaker 1: be around when the feds come.
Speaker 2: But that's not going to be on Google. Oh, it's
Speaker 2: just not. So it's not going to be like You're
Speaker 2: going to be like Susie Jones is her boyfriend is
Speaker 2: a drug dealer?
Speaker 1: About it would be on Google because this has happened.
Speaker 1: I had a friend and she had a case pending.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, and so that's a case.
Speaker 2: Serch.
Speaker 1: Oh well, I didn't it just ship. It just came
Speaker 1: It was in the Washington Post. Okay, so it just
Speaker 1: came up when I googled her and so so. Then
Speaker 1: I knew. Okay, if I go out with her and
Speaker 1: just have some drinks, there's a potential that somebody might
Speaker 1: come that night lock her up.
Speaker 2: True, But are you going to be doing illegal activity
Speaker 2: with that friend?
Speaker 1: No, I'm not doing any illegal activity. But I just
Speaker 1: need to know because.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna get locked up for associations with her.
Speaker 1: I don't I don't want to be in the paper
Speaker 1: like Jaselle Bryant was there when so and so got
Speaker 1: locked up. No, I don't want that.
Speaker 2: So instead, he's just going to be like out to
Speaker 2: drinks and like your head is on a swift.
Speaker 1: I'm not going when and when she invites me for drinks,
Speaker 1: I'm not going.
Speaker 2: You're not going to be her friend?
Speaker 1: Oh right, that's mean okay, No, I'm not. No, And
Speaker 1: that's when Drake comes in now friends exactly.
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, I mean I think right. So, if it's
Speaker 2: a new friend she's got some a criminal record, yeah
Speaker 2: you might want to you know, stand back, yes, yes,
Speaker 2: But if it's a friend that you've had for a
Speaker 2: while and she got into a little bit of trouble,
Speaker 2: I say you continue to support her.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, So you know, because I know, and
Speaker 1: it bothers the freak out of me. That a lot
Speaker 1: of times, especially when when we meet people, they feel
Speaker 1: like they have something to prove, right, Yes, for whatever reason,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Maybe it's because we on TV. I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is, but they feel like they
Speaker 1: got something to prove, so they want to come to
Speaker 1: the conversation talking about all this stuff like bragging, yes,
Speaker 1: like name dropping.
Speaker 2: That is an instant turn off for me, Like you
Speaker 2: you want me to turn my ears off?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Like they're like, just you know, my ears don't work
Speaker 2: as soon as you start talking about who you know
Speaker 2: and what you did and what you have, And.
Speaker 1: I'm no, No. The best way to make friends, I think,
Speaker 1: is to just be normal. Just be you. Don't try
Speaker 1: to be something you're not, just be who you are.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: And it's weird.
Speaker 2: It's like I think some people might hear that were
Speaker 2: We're like, you know, we don't want to hear people bragging, like, oh, well,
Speaker 2: maybe you're jealous of what they're what's coming out of
Speaker 2: their mouth. It's like, no, I want to have a
Speaker 2: connection with someone because I connect with them with their personality.
Speaker 2: I don't want it to be Okay, Well, I'm impressed
Speaker 2: by what you have and what you do, so I
Speaker 2: want to be your friends so I can benefit from
Speaker 2: what you have and what you.
Speaker 1: Do, right, you know, No, that's a no.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And there's been times I remember, like, you know,
Speaker 2: years ago, when I was, when we were young and dumb,
Speaker 2: we would buy new cars like all the time. Yes,
Speaker 2: And I remember like buying a car and I'm a
Speaker 2: type I don't like, I don't go around bragging about
Speaker 2: what I have. And and the next time my friends
Speaker 2: saw me, they were like, oh my god, why didn't
Speaker 2: you tell me you got a new car? And I'm like,
Speaker 2: why would I tell you that I got.
Speaker 1: A new car? Yes, And people who asked that I
Speaker 1: got to look at them weird because it's like, why
Speaker 1: you why? Why is that the topic of conversation? Why
Speaker 1: is materialistic things the only topic of conversation?
Speaker 2: Exactly? So that's the type of stuff like where my
Speaker 2: antennas are up when the focus is on materialistic things,
Speaker 2: or know what you have or what you do or
Speaker 2: who you know. I mean, there are some people and
Speaker 2: we we know we have mutual friends or mutual acquaintances
Speaker 2: that they come in the room and like, yeah, I
Speaker 2: was with Bobby Brown the other night, and then Al
Speaker 2: Sharpton called me, and then our shop didn't call you, yes,
Speaker 2: and they don't know you. And then I was I
Speaker 2: was at a restaurant and Hillary Clinton walked over and.
Speaker 1: Was like I think I met you before. Like it's
Speaker 1: like girls, star stop.
Speaker 2: We're not impressed, we're actually turned off. Yes, yes, if
Speaker 2: it comes up in casual conversation, right, you know, Like
Speaker 2: so I don't want people to think like, oh my god,
Speaker 2: well I can't share anything about my life, but it's
Speaker 2: a certain way to do it.
Speaker 1: I have to make an admission. I don't like talking
Speaker 1: about anything deep, okay, or anything spiritual.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: I just don't.
Speaker 2: I know that's real bad. That's not a surprise to me.
Speaker 1: It's not surprised to Robbing or anyone else that knows me.
Speaker 1: I don't have no deep conversation.
Speaker 2: And so people probably think you do because you were
Speaker 2: like a preacher's wife. They probably think like you sit around.
Speaker 1: And just have deep bossom. Yeah. No, I'm not sitting
Speaker 1: around reciting gospel hymns.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that. And I'm just I don't want
Speaker 1: anything that's like I have to, like really super think
Speaker 1: about it. So talk to me only if I just
Speaker 1: met you, about surface things.
Speaker 2: Okay. So I'm so so word to anyone that Meetszelle
Speaker 2: wants to be her friend. Yes, surface her about the weather,
Speaker 2: talk to her about her favorite police to vacation and restaurants,
Speaker 2: her favorite designers.
Speaker 1: My shoes, talking about my shoes, my earrings, favorite restaurant.
Speaker 1: And I don't know what the last and you watched
Speaker 1: on Netflix?
Speaker 2: Yes, the latest Netflix?
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it. Okay, if you talk about anything outside
Speaker 1: of that, I would have had to have known you.
Speaker 2: For a very long time.
Speaker 1: Well, so there's levels to girlfriends, friendships, there's levels.
Speaker 2: Yes, But I feel like, what about business? What if
Speaker 2: there's a woman that is entrepreneur and you know you
Speaker 2: want to you all kind of just start talking about
Speaker 2: what you do and.
Speaker 1: I like that.
Speaker 2: Okay, you like that.
Speaker 1: I like that. But you can't lie.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, we're not lying. We're not bragging. No lying,
Speaker 2: no bragging.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, So I like that. So if you're
Speaker 1: coming to me and we just met and we're bonding
Speaker 1: over business, the best way to you know, start up
Speaker 1: a business being an entrepreneur being the pitfalls of being
Speaker 1: a black woman in this in this world call I
Speaker 1: mean this thing called life cool.
Speaker 2: Stay tuned for that episode that's coming Yes.
Speaker 1: That's that's coming up. I love that, okay, because I
Speaker 1: always want to see black women win, right. But the
Speaker 1: minute you get deep with it and start talking about
Speaker 1: I was, I was, so.
Speaker 2: What if she's like and God told me that.
Speaker 1: No, the minute you can deep with it, I'm out
Speaker 1: and tuned out. I have tuned the freak out, I am.
Speaker 1: I'm not listening.
Speaker 2: That's the reason why she's a multi millionaire, because she
Speaker 2: told her to do to open that business.
Speaker 1: Okay, fine, I'll listen then, Okay, all right, okay, but
Speaker 1: you can't. There's again, there's levels to girlfriend friendship. Level
Speaker 1: number one talk about nothing, okay, level number two you
Speaker 1: can get throw some business in.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: But you know what I do?
Speaker 2: You hate? I hate when I go to a I mean,
Speaker 2: it doesn't happen that much anymore because now we're on
Speaker 2: TV and people recognize us. But in the past, we
Speaker 2: go to like the social events and you're just meeting
Speaker 2: random people and the very very very first question out
Speaker 2: of their mouth is what do you do?
Speaker 1: So what do you do for a living, I say nothing.
Speaker 1: I still on the couch me too.
Speaker 2: I'll be like, well, thank you for asking, but I
Speaker 2: am a stay at home woman.
Speaker 1: I just find it very pretentious when people come and
Speaker 1: they ask that kind of right, because.
Speaker 2: They want you to ask them what they do because
Speaker 2: they're like, you know, a high powered they're like a
Speaker 2: partner at a law firm, and they like tell you that, right,
Speaker 2: Like I just I hate that question, And maybe I
Speaker 2: hate it because like I never I didn't really have
Speaker 2: something I wanted to talk.
Speaker 1: Because Robin was actually at at home on this show.
Speaker 2: If I was like a surgeon, I'd be like, yes,
Speaker 2: I am a brain surgeon, and I'd be like, thank
Speaker 2: you for.
Speaker 1: Asking, right, right, Okay, So there's always I find like
Speaker 1: in a group of girlfriends, it's this girlfriends that you
Speaker 1: have in different categories, right for sure? So this girlfriends
Speaker 1: that you want to hang out with and have drinks with, sore?
Speaker 1: Are there friends that you like them better when they're drunk? Right?
Speaker 1: Like there's some friends that they're they're non drunk self,
Speaker 1: I can't stand oh, but when they're drunk, Oh, they're amazing,
Speaker 1: right right.
Speaker 2: That's not good though.
Speaker 1: It's not good at all. But I only want to
Speaker 1: be around you when you're drunk.
Speaker 2: So then do you like push drinks to their way?
Speaker 1: And I only want to be around you if drinks
Speaker 1: are being served.
Speaker 2: Right, So so then that's a surface friend. Okay, yes, right, yes,
Speaker 2: that's that's a surface friend, Like you have no desire
Speaker 2: to talk to that person on the phone or to
Speaker 2: hear about what they're going through or you know, to
Speaker 2: talk about what your you know, right, no, yeah.
Speaker 1: So and there's a friend that we both know and
Speaker 1: she doesn't want to drink anymore, right, oh yeah, and
Speaker 1: she's a dud. She I don't want to be around her.
Speaker 1: Like when she was drinking. Oh, she was the life
Speaker 1: of the party, she was the best woman in the room. Right,
Speaker 1: But now that she doesn't want to drink anymore, I
Speaker 1: don't want to see her.
Speaker 2: I know. But then you have to worry about people
Speaker 2: like that, like what's going on in their real life
Speaker 2: that they can't be fun and enjoyable when they're not drinking.
Speaker 1: But see, that's not this is this is girlfriends. I'm
Speaker 1: not married to you, that's not my problem, Like I'm
Speaker 1: not you know what I'm saying. We just friends. You know,
Speaker 1: you gotta you gotta worry about your own problems on
Speaker 1: your own time.
Speaker 2: Yes, you do. Friend. Yeah, she's a surface friend.
Speaker 1: Yes, I am the worst. Now, then you have.
Speaker 2: I have some friends where I'm like, please don't get drunk.
Speaker 2: Why because it's like because then they become the one that's.
Speaker 1: Like, oh my god, I'm so upset. My life is
Speaker 1: so crazy, like like.
Speaker 2: They become emotional then and then they ruin your drunkenness, like.
Speaker 1: They ruin your you're high, yeah, you.
Speaker 2: Know, and it's like, oh my god, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: Okay that whoever that is in your life, she's not
Speaker 1: going out with us. I don't want her around, yeah,
Speaker 1: because I don't want no crying drunks at the club.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. Okay, I'm so horrible.
Speaker 2: Right So yeah, that like, but that's that can be
Speaker 2: like your real good friend in real life, and then
Speaker 2: put some drinks up in her and she's just like
Speaker 2: a DeBie downer.
Speaker 1: Right right now, do you feel like girlfriends tell you
Speaker 1: the truth as it relates to their their whole factor, right,
Speaker 1: their their whole meeter right, Because that's really important, right,
Speaker 1: And the reason why it's important is because if her
Speaker 1: home meter is off the charts, She's going to sleep
Speaker 1: with your man, no question. So it's always like when
Speaker 1: she starts talking about stuff she's doing, it's like I'm
Speaker 1: side eying her because at any given moment, she's going
Speaker 1: to try to sleep with the dude I'm right now.
Speaker 1: Especially if she said her boyfriend was married, I'm always
Speaker 1: feeling like you might try to sleep with I'm not married.
Speaker 1: But you just you have no roles, you have no boundaries.
Speaker 1: I need rolls.
Speaker 2: Well, okay, So the question is, so you meet a
Speaker 2: new friend, do you ask them what their home meter is?
Speaker 1: No, you just listen.
Speaker 2: When do you Okay, you just listen to the things
Speaker 2: she starts proping questions, you ask yes.
Speaker 1: You know, hey girl, you know you married? No? Who
Speaker 1: you saying? Oh, I'm saying so and so.
Speaker 2: But then this is another question that goes along with that. So,
Speaker 2: if you are in a relationship, or if you're married
Speaker 2: or in a relationship, do you even want to invite
Speaker 2: new friends around that are single you know? Or do
Speaker 2: you want most of your new friends to be in
Speaker 2: a relationship?
Speaker 1: Hmmm, you know the plot thick. I think I think
Speaker 1: that yes, if I was married, I would want my
Speaker 1: new girlfriends to also be married or in a like
Speaker 1: significant relationship. I don't want no straggly single girls just around.
Speaker 2: Right, because then that doesn't even work. So it's like, oh,
Speaker 2: all right, honey, you're talking to your man. All right, honey,
Speaker 2: I'm about to go out with Tracy. Who's Tracy? Oh?
Speaker 1: Tracy, Tracy is my family? Can I play the part
Speaker 1: of one?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Who's Tracy? I ain't never heard nobody named Tracy.
Speaker 2: Well, I just met Tracy. We were at the mall
Speaker 2: and I bumped into her and we were shopping, and like,
Speaker 2: she just wants to hang out and where y'all going.
Speaker 2: We're just gonna get some drinks. Mmm, what time you
Speaker 2: coming back? I mean, I don't know. We'll be out
Speaker 2: like a couple of hours.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's Tracy.
Speaker 2: Well, so she married, what's up with I don't think so?
Speaker 1: Yeah. No, Now Wine is not gonna say no, but
Speaker 1: he is going to be He's going.
Speaker 2: To ask fifty questions and call me fifty times.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's going. Okay, Just for those of y'all don't
Speaker 1: know why Dixon Wine calls Robin a thousand times a day. Okay,
Speaker 1: Like we've been sitting here doing this podcast. Now we're
Speaker 1: we're on minute twenty two. He's called four times. No, yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: she's okay, I'm lying, But Win calls Robin. Now if
Speaker 1: one thanks, Robin is out doing something she ain't supposed
Speaker 1: to be doing. That puts some calls or repeat. Okay,
Speaker 1: Wan Dixon is going. And Wan is the type of
Speaker 1: guy that, do you think something on the side of
Speaker 1: the road, and no he doesn't.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: Why is the type of guy that if you don't answer,
Speaker 1: he keeps calling back and keeps calling back until you
Speaker 1: ain't gonna call my friend? Yes, yes, and then he
Speaker 1: will call anybody that she said she was with. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's just Win. That's the nature of the relationship. No judgment.
Speaker 1: It's crazy, but no judgment.
Speaker 2: Okay, he's just worried. Okay, thanks. The man at the
Speaker 2: gas station kidnapped me. Okay.
Speaker 1: But I totally agree. I feel like girlfriends that are
Speaker 1: not that don't have the same demographic that you are
Speaker 1: living should not come into your circle. I mean, I
Speaker 1: just think that that's you're you're setting yourself up for problems, right.
Speaker 2: I agree, unless you have like mutual friends that can
Speaker 2: vouch for that person. You know, I just feel like,
Speaker 2: not a random that is totally living the single whole life.
Speaker 1: No, that's not going to work, Like no at all, No,
Speaker 1: not at all, and and it so so we're saying
Speaker 1: all this to say, it becomes very difficult for you
Speaker 1: to really a trust people that are going to be
Speaker 1: in your circle. I don't think that, you know, I
Speaker 1: get real nervous about what people. You know, if I
Speaker 1: have a conversation with somebody, like how they take that
Speaker 1: conversation later, like how that you know, I mean, like
Speaker 1: mm hmmm, I think it's a great conversation, but they
Speaker 1: walk away and they're like, Justelle's an asshole, And I'm like,
Speaker 1: but I thought it was good. I thought we had
Speaker 1: jokes and everything. So, you know, I always get feel
Speaker 1: weird about it sometimes. But the reality of it is
Speaker 1: you have to really have your spidy senses up with
Speaker 1: all people, not just girlfriends, but like all people, because
Speaker 1: people are crazy outide in these streets.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to remember the last time I met a
Speaker 2: new friend, not like outside of the show. Yes, not
Speaker 2: because of the show that I connected with and like
Speaker 2: really developed a friendship with Hm. You know what I
Speaker 2: would say like Vicky Vicky Irvin, who is I met
Speaker 2: her on a business matter, yes, and that kind of
Speaker 2: you know, created a friendship.
Speaker 1: Yes. And Vicky Irvin, you did your lipstick with correct.
Speaker 2: Right, right, So we had so I did a lipstick
Speaker 2: lip gloss collaboration with her. So she's an entrepreneur. My
Speaker 2: real estate mentor introduced me to her because he thought
Speaker 2: that she could be helpful to me because he knew
Speaker 2: that I was just you know, getting into the entrepreneurial space. Yes,
Speaker 2: and so so that friendship developed, but it was it
Speaker 2: started more. It's I feel like nowadays at our age,
Speaker 2: when we meet people it's because of a purpose.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, it's got to be. You guys have to
Speaker 1: be aligned in some kind of way, right. So so
Speaker 1: if it's not business, it might be because, like you said,
Speaker 1: my kids, because kids or your partners might know each
Speaker 1: other and then you guys bond over that. Otherwise it
Speaker 1: just like I'm not going and get my hair done
Speaker 1: and I meet you at the salon and we become friends. Right,
Speaker 1: That's not happening.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, no, definitely, And it's and it's like kind
Speaker 2: of weird when people are like, oh, we should exchange numbers,
Speaker 2: and You're like, no, we shouldn't. No, we should not,
Speaker 2: because first of all, I'm already not the best friend
Speaker 2: that I can be to the friends that I already have,
Speaker 2: you know, because I'm just kidding.
Speaker 1: Robin is great to me.
Speaker 2: You probably these days get most of my friend time.
Speaker 1: That is true.
Speaker 2: My other friends are probably hating on you.
Speaker 1: I know. But actually that happened to me in the gym.
Speaker 1: So a very nice lady girl she walked up to
Speaker 1: me and she started asking me. She saw that my
Speaker 1: house is being renovated, and she asked me about it,
Speaker 1: and then she talked about the fact that she's got
Speaker 1: she knows somebody who you know, has a renovation business
Speaker 1: or something. And then she was like, oh, you're so
Speaker 1: super cool. We should hang out. Let's exchange numbers. Yeah
Speaker 1: that's no, I'm not that super good.
Speaker 2: No, I'm not.
Speaker 1: And I and she made me give her my number,
Speaker 1: like it was kind of like her phone was out
Speaker 1: and I had my phone in my hand and like
Speaker 1: I didn't know what to do. I couldn't back away. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I had to give her my number. And it was
Speaker 1: just like so weird, And I thought to myself, Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I hope she doesn't call me.
Speaker 2: Did she know? Oh?
Speaker 1: Okay, thank god?
Speaker 2: Right's weird.
Speaker 1: But but when things like that happen, it just makes
Speaker 1: me feel like this is not authentic. Like I want
Speaker 1: to meet girlfriends and it's an authentic relationship, you know,
Speaker 1: it's a great feeling.
Speaker 2: Right, It's not like pushed on you exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Digital interaction? What the hell is that? Social media?
Speaker 1: Okay, so I'm supposed to meet people on social media? Okay,
Speaker 1: for the record, let's just say, for the record, I
Speaker 1: feel like I have enough girlfriends in my life.
Speaker 2: Do you Oh I have tons? Yes, I have tons?
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, but so are you asking if on social
Speaker 1: media somebody reaches out?
Speaker 2: So okay, So say, on social media you have like
Speaker 2: acquaintances kind of and they're trying. It's like, does that
Speaker 2: muddy your your interaction with them in real life? So
Speaker 2: you have people who I think are more friendly on
Speaker 2: social media than they are in real life, Like they
Speaker 2: might see you come afar and like not speak, and
Speaker 2: then on social media.
Speaker 1: They're all like, hey, girl, how would you know?
Speaker 2: You just know?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 2: I feel like that's like people not being comfortable. Oh
Speaker 2: you know, like you, like, okay, if you see someone
Speaker 2: who's commenting on your social media, but when you see
Speaker 2: them in real life, they're barely like coming up to
Speaker 2: you and saying hi.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so they're social media friends, right, okay, right.
Speaker 2: But then but they're like almost intimidated in real life
Speaker 2: to come up to you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's weird. So it's kind of like you're
Speaker 1: hiding behind your social media handle exactly. Yeah, that's I
Speaker 1: find that to be a stalker exactly. Okay, Yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Mean it's I just think it's more of like maybe
Speaker 2: they are socially awkward or maybe they're intimidated. But I
Speaker 2: have experienced that where people will interact with me more
Speaker 2: on social media than if they were actually face to face.
Speaker 1: Right, okay, Okay, So I do have some girlfriends and
Speaker 1: unfortunately they're like sorority sisters, right.
Speaker 2: And unfortunately they're sororities.
Speaker 1: Well there was a reason. I mean, I love the
Speaker 1: fact that they're my sorority sisters, but like that's the
Speaker 1: reason why they've been in my life forever.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: But then as time goes by, you know, as you
Speaker 1: get older, you change, you grow, and you see people
Speaker 1: who don't change and grow and then you realize they're losers,
Speaker 1: right is that terrible to say? Like they're kind of
Speaker 1: like they're stuck. They're stuck.
Speaker 2: They're stuck. They haven't grown.
Speaker 1: They haven't evolved, and you're at a totally different place.
Speaker 1: So how do you deal with do you do you
Speaker 1: cut those people out of your life? Don't listen to
Speaker 1: me because I cut people like I got a machete
Speaker 1: out here and I just be cut.
Speaker 2: No, you know why you don't cut them out?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 2: I guess guess what one day you might be in
Speaker 2: a totally different place, be a loser and you yes,
Speaker 2: and you might need your friends to love you unconditionally. Right,
Speaker 2: So I have you know, my sorrowers that I love
Speaker 2: dearly that I probably would never have even have even
Speaker 2: met if I weren't in the sorority, you know, So
Speaker 2: I wouldn't would have never like really been friends with them,
Speaker 2: and we are totally different people. I mean, the sorority
Speaker 2: is a good thing because it kind of forces you
Speaker 2: to receive people where they are, to love them regardless,
Speaker 2: and to kind of be their friend regardless, like whether
Speaker 2: or not you would be their friend or not. True
Speaker 2: outside of the sorority, and so I think, okay, it's
Speaker 2: you know, you can't be like you didn't level up yet, girl,
Speaker 2: So I'm not gonna be your friend.
Speaker 1: No, not you didn't level up. But it's kind of
Speaker 1: like the the we're in a different space mentally, right. Okay,
Speaker 1: So I'm just gonna say it to the people. If
Speaker 1: you want to cut people out your life because God
Speaker 1: brings people in your life or a reason in the season,
Speaker 1: then go ahead on and do it. I'm not mad
Speaker 1: at you, but reasonable Robin will not.
Speaker 2: Just don't be mad when other people cut you out
Speaker 2: of their life.
Speaker 1: Okay, listen, I'm bem begging people to cut me out
Speaker 1: they life. I'm like, please, can I have it in writing?
Speaker 1: Cut me out right?
Speaker 2: Are you sure? Yes?
Speaker 1: Oh my God, leave me alone. But I do feel like,
Speaker 1: you know, there comes a time and place where you
Speaker 1: want people that can add value, right, and you want
Speaker 1: you want to surround yourself with people that are constantly
Speaker 1: allowing you to be your greater self. Right, And sometimes
Speaker 1: the girlfriends can't come on that journey.
Speaker 2: But but why is it just because so you're saying, mentally,
Speaker 2: they're like they're negative or they are because just because
Speaker 2: they might not be on your level, they might still
Speaker 2: be able to provide some sort of support to you
Speaker 2: or some sort of you know, encouragement or you know friendship.
Speaker 1: Right, Yes, yes, it's true, and.
Speaker 2: Sometimes you want to keep that friend who was there
Speaker 2: with you before you are you were the person you
Speaker 2: are today.
Speaker 1: Okay, But if we've known each other for like twenty
Speaker 1: five years and you're still talking about the same shit
Speaker 1: that you were talking about when I met you twenty
Speaker 1: five years ago, then there's a problem.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, well that's a big problem.
Speaker 1: Right, Like if I feel like and it's not that
Speaker 1: I've leveled up and you stayed the same, it's like,
Speaker 1: mentally we're just not there.
Speaker 2: Right, So have you said that to them? No?
Speaker 1: I thought all that. I think that's rude if I
Speaker 1: tell people you are a loser.
Speaker 2: Well, see, that's a conversation like what is okay to
Speaker 2: say to your friends and what's not okay to say
Speaker 2: to your friends, because sometimes your friends need to hear
Speaker 2: the hard truth and okay, if they don't receive it
Speaker 2: the way you intended, then that's on them.
Speaker 1: That is very true. And to be honest with you,
Speaker 1: I am very honest with my friends.
Speaker 2: Really, okay, I think, And do they appreciate your honesty? Hell?
Speaker 1: No, hate me, No, I'm kidding. I think they do.
Speaker 1: And you want to know why, because I have so
Speaker 1: many friends that I've had forever, and they tell me
Speaker 1: things that I've said to them ten fifteen years later
Speaker 1: that helped them in that moment that I didn't know
Speaker 1: help them. But they tell me, hey, Giselle, I remember
Speaker 1: you said this to me a long time ago, and
Speaker 1: then I broke up with that loser dude and I
Speaker 1: found this other guy or whatever, whatever the scenario is.
Speaker 1: They repeat to me verbat in what I said to them,
Speaker 1: and so, oh, I tell you.
Speaker 2: I was an oracle.
Speaker 1: This is what I know. I'm going off the deep end. Okay, fine,
Speaker 1: but I do. I'm getting deep in y'all know I
Speaker 1: don't get deep but I need to get back to that.
Speaker 1: I need to get back to just like being brutally
Speaker 1: honest with people when I know you can do better
Speaker 1: and be a better person.
Speaker 2: Right. Oh, for sure, I think, especially as you get older,
Speaker 2: you're not helping your friend at off. You can't be
Speaker 2: honest with your friend, Yes, if you can't encourage them to,
Speaker 2: you drop the negativity the toxicity and to do better. Yes,
Speaker 2: and if your friend does not want to receive those messages,
Speaker 2: then yeah, maybe it's time to drop them as a
Speaker 2: friend because you can't. You don't know how to be
Speaker 2: a good friend to someone that doesn't want to receive
Speaker 2: your friendship, right right, you know?
Speaker 1: And I think this is good.
Speaker 2: And friendship is not always about being a yes person.
Speaker 2: It's not about always agreeing with your friend liking what
Speaker 2: they do. You know. Of course we want to celebrate
Speaker 2: our friends and support our friends. But if there's something
Speaker 2: that we can you know, what is it constructive criticism? Yes,
Speaker 2: if we can constructively criticize our friends. I know I
Speaker 2: want to be constructively criticized. You know, I don't. I
Speaker 2: don't receive it very often because I am quite perfect.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, So and this is this is actually for
Speaker 1: me and you because you know, we've been friends, and
Speaker 1: we we have we're in this group, this circle. You know,
Speaker 1: we'll just refer to the show and a lot of
Speaker 1: times they think that we know things about each other
Speaker 1: that therefore that the world doesn't know. Therefore, that's why
Speaker 1: we're friends, because we got dirt on each other, right,
Speaker 1: which is true. But that's not why we're friends. Meaning
Speaker 1: I know stuff about Robin that I'll never say, and
Speaker 1: vice versa. But that's what friendship is. But the question
Speaker 1: is when you meet somebody new, like how quickly do
Speaker 1: you tell them like your business, your bi business, your
Speaker 1: personal biousness, because that's a trust thing, right You got
Speaker 1: to trust that person because you got to know you're
Speaker 1: telling them and they might tell one other person, but
Speaker 1: they can't tell the world.
Speaker 2: Right, I don't. That is so hard because I feel like,
Speaker 2: for me, I'm not going to tell you anything until
Speaker 2: you tell me something, and so then it becomes like
Speaker 2: what comes first.
Speaker 1: The chicken or the egg?
Speaker 2: Yes, and I know you ain't telling me that, Like
Speaker 2: I don't even know how, Like I think it takes
Speaker 2: a minute, but like a very long time for people
Speaker 2: to really start sharing unless you're a really open person
Speaker 2: and you don't care.
Speaker 1: Right, But I don't know. I mean, I'm not. I
Speaker 1: I always find that people spill their guts to me.
Speaker 1: I do not know why, but they do.
Speaker 2: And then she tells me everyone.
Speaker 1: And I did tell Robin. But I mean, they spill
Speaker 1: their guts and I think maybe they feel like that
Speaker 1: is their way to build a trust and then maybe
Speaker 1: they're thinking, I'm gonna spell my guts, but I'm done
Speaker 1: you right now. I don't care when I meet you,
Speaker 1: how I meet you. I'm never spelling my guts. But
Speaker 1: I feel like it's it's very difficult for women to
Speaker 1: feel a sense of comfort, so because you do want
Speaker 1: to have somebody that you can share a bunch of
Speaker 1: stuff with and that is going to support you and
Speaker 1: not judge you, and that's in your corner. So it's
Speaker 1: just a it's just a very fine line, and I
Speaker 1: have I haven't been able to balance it or figure
Speaker 1: it out right.
Speaker 2: I don't think there's a real right time. You know,
Speaker 2: it's not like, oh well exactly on the twenty eighth
Speaker 2: day after meeting the friend. No, it's okay to share,
Speaker 2: you know. I think it's more of an intuition thing.
Speaker 2: I think it's more of just, you know, the vibe
Speaker 2: between the two people where you feel, okay, this person
Speaker 2: knows me or cares about me differently or more than
Speaker 2: someone else. Like it's so weird, like you can't really
Speaker 2: explain why certain people are closer friends than others. You know,
Speaker 2: you can have a friend circle of eight or ten
Speaker 2: people and there might be that one or two people
Speaker 2: that you just vibe better with.
Speaker 1: Yes, for whatever reason, for whatever reason, maybe it's it's
Speaker 1: it's pheromones, it's just you know, chemistry, it's whatever. But
Speaker 1: like what it is?
Speaker 2: We write what is it? What is it?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know, but I just want
Speaker 1: to put out there because you know, I'm thinking about
Speaker 1: my girlfriends and just relationships. And I'm the girl that
Speaker 1: if I see a man cheating, I'm gonna tell you okay, okay,
Speaker 1: and I'm going to get my phone and take a
Speaker 1: picture video.
Speaker 2: But see and pictures. I feel like you have to
Speaker 2: if you're going to tell her, you got to have
Speaker 2: the pictures in the video.
Speaker 1: Yes, And I'm going to like let you know, and
Speaker 1: I don't want to discuss it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yes, because there's there. There have been many, many,
Speaker 2: many situations where a girlfriend sees something or hears something
Speaker 2: and then she tells the friend and the man lies
Speaker 2: and oh no, that didn't happen, she lies, ring you
Speaker 2: don't need to be friends with her anymore, and then
Speaker 2: you're the one that's true, the messenger, the one that's
Speaker 2: on the out.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: Yes, So I feel like it's hard. I think it's
Speaker 2: strict on the relationship.
Speaker 1: It depends on the relationship. But if that's your good girlfriend,
Speaker 1: I think it's your right to let her know what's
Speaker 1: going on.
Speaker 2: So then do you think friends should when they kind
Speaker 2: of start their friendship or at some point in the
Speaker 2: friendship say look, girl, I'm just telling you, if you
Speaker 2: hear something or see something about my man, then tell me, like,
Speaker 2: do you think that should be a spoken Should that
Speaker 2: be spoken? Do you think it should be? Like, all right,
Speaker 2: let's everybody sit down in circle and okay, Robin, do
Speaker 2: you want to know? Okay, Jeselle, do you want to know? Okay,
Speaker 2: Susie do you want to know?
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? And it's like some people
Speaker 1: don't want to know.
Speaker 2: Let's write it down. We're gonna take notes so that
Speaker 2: we know. And so then when so when something happens,
Speaker 2: all the you know, ten girls in the group and
Speaker 2: the nine girls get on a conference call. All right, y'all.
Speaker 2: So Stephanie says she wants to know, So who's going
Speaker 2: to tell her? You know what I'm saying, like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I was I'm almost considering like texting my girlfriends and saying, hey, guys,
Speaker 2: we need to like sit down.
Speaker 1: Because they're gonna be like, who you talking about my man?
Speaker 1: You talking about my man? Ain't my man? They call
Speaker 1: him home every night. I know he ain't doing it,
Speaker 1: but I think that should be disclosed.
Speaker 2: I actually think that should be like, okay, a girlfriend rule,
Speaker 2: because I have had and I'll stay. Like in college,
Speaker 2: Wan I was, I was pledging delt and I was
Speaker 2: never around and Jan cheated on me, oh with a
Speaker 2: girl at Maryland.
Speaker 1: Right break, I can't.
Speaker 2: Breaking news one chid. You don't mean when when we
Speaker 2: were in college and one of so after I crossed,
Speaker 2: one of my line sisters found out and it was
Speaker 2: a whole like, you know, I didn't know that my
Speaker 2: out of the ten of us, nine of my line
Speaker 2: sisters are having these power owls about what do we do?
Speaker 2: What do we say? You know what I mean? And
Speaker 2: then it and it turned into a whole mess because
Speaker 2: I just needed my one line sister to come to
Speaker 2: me and tell me. But then it just turned into
Speaker 2: it was a mess in my relationship with that one
Speaker 2: line sister was kind of messed up for a little
Speaker 2: bit and blah blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: All that I held that's why he put you pledged delta.
Speaker 1: That's a whole other story. But anyway, I mean no,
Speaker 1: like that's a mess. And then the reason why it's
Speaker 1: some messes because you know they're sitting around talking about
Speaker 1: you for days.
Speaker 2: But so I feel like if you just if everyone
Speaker 2: just puts it out there in the air, you know,
Speaker 2: to your girlfriends, to your friends circle, and say, look,
Speaker 2: this is what it is, so we don't have to
Speaker 2: we can skip that part, you know, so tell me
Speaker 2: or don't tell me.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about it. That's true.
Speaker 2: Act like you ain't never seen it. Yes, I don't
Speaker 2: need to know.
Speaker 1: Okay, well I'm telling you now, Robin, you need to
Speaker 1: tell me.
Speaker 2: So I'm sending text messages.
Speaker 1: Okay, So text mess text message your girlfriend group tonight,
Speaker 1: y'all and make that decision. Do you want to know?
Speaker 1: Check the box? Yes, all right?
Speaker 2: And I think that's a good takeaway for everyone listening,
Speaker 2: Like I think that's a good that's actually like a
Speaker 2: good conversation to have, like when you have your girls
Speaker 2: night and you're drinking wine and so that's put that
Speaker 2: topic out there.
Speaker 1: Yes, do you want to know? All right? So, typically
Speaker 1: at the end of our episode. We have our reasonably
Speaker 1: shady people other week for that episode, but today we
Speaker 1: have some changes. Okay. So we have put out to
Speaker 1: the universe some friendship pet Peeves. We put out there
Speaker 1: on our social media, and you all have answered yes
Speaker 1: in a very big way. Okay, So friendship pet Peeves
Speaker 1: is what we're going to be discussing on, yes, right.
Speaker 2: Now, So we are going to go into let's see,
Speaker 2: I'm going to tell you the number of people that
Speaker 2: said one uppers.
Speaker 1: Okay, So okay, let's let's talk about bunkers. Okay, what
Speaker 1: one opers is? Hey, girl, I just bought a new
Speaker 1: car and then you say.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, well I'm getting a new car tomorrow
Speaker 2: and it's going to have.
Speaker 1: I'll get a new car tomorrow and it is like
Speaker 1: the Bentley of the Bentleys.
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm the only one that hasn't.
Speaker 1: Yes, they only made two in the United States and
Speaker 1: I have one and Oprah has the other one, right,
Speaker 1: like crazy right?
Speaker 2: Or like you buy a house and then your friend's like, well.
Speaker 1: I'm going to go buy a house, and yes, how
Speaker 1: many square feed is your house? Minus four thousand, oh
Speaker 1: minus five thousand? Girls like that, like that's some bullshit
Speaker 1: and stop it right, like save it.
Speaker 2: The thing is like your friend, whenever your friend has
Speaker 2: some news, like celebrate your friend in that moment it
Speaker 2: about your friend, yeah, glets them have their moment, and
Speaker 2: then okay, a week later, if the conversation arises on
Speaker 2: this topic, then you can share your news, but like,
Speaker 2: let your friend have their moment.
Speaker 1: Yes, and stop talking about yourself yes, yes, okay.
Speaker 2: Which you know leads to a lot of people said selfishness. Okay,
Speaker 2: so what does that mean and not reciprocating support. So
Speaker 2: some friends call you when they have something going on
Speaker 2: that they either want to you know, talk about or
Speaker 2: tell you about. And then when the conversation, when that
Speaker 2: conversation about themselves ends, what a conversation is over. And
Speaker 2: it's like, right, they don't they don't care about what's
Speaker 2: going on in your world. They don't hear about.
Speaker 1: You know, I might be a victim of this, and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you why. So everybody knows I have
Speaker 1: a friend named Cal, and every night me and Cal
Speaker 1: talk and he says, okay, Zoul, start talking about you.
Speaker 1: That's how he starts the conversation. And I'm like, it's
Speaker 1: like hello, hey, hey, all right, start talking about you,
Speaker 1: jizou just and I'm like cow noh, stop, Like I
Speaker 1: want to know about your day. He's like, the day
Speaker 1: was good, Okay, go oh my god, it's it's actually
Speaker 1: funny now. But it made me think, like, Okay, do
Speaker 1: I just give him like my side of my world?
Speaker 1: And do I never check in with his? And probably?
Speaker 1: So I am happy that he made me aware so
Speaker 1: that I don't do that anymore.
Speaker 2: Okay, yes, that's good. Another one in this. I am
Speaker 2: so a lot of these. I'm starting to reevaluate myself
Speaker 2: as a friend because I'm starting to think I'm a horrible.
Speaker 1: Friend because people said friends that are late.
Speaker 2: Friends that are late, friends that are flaky Robin Robin
Speaker 2: can I can I tell you? Like my flake meter
Speaker 2: is off off the charts, blake off the chart. I literally.
Speaker 1: One time.
Speaker 2: It was going to Las Vegas to celebrate a friend's birthday.
Speaker 2: Uh huh, like New Year's Eve, Las Vegas. I didn't
Speaker 2: feel like packing, so I didn't go.
Speaker 1: Did you have a ticket?
Speaker 2: Yes, the ticket a hotel room I pay. Here's here's
Speaker 2: my portion for the hotel room. I'll get you know
Speaker 2: all that. I'm like I don't feel like packing. I'm
Speaker 2: not going.
Speaker 1: Robin is the worst, the worst, the worse. You have
Speaker 1: to do better. You have to do better, to do better,
Speaker 1: but at least you pay. Because my pet peeve is
Speaker 1: my friends that don't want to pay for nothing, right y'all.
Speaker 1: Bitches are broke, okay, and I'm mad at it, and
Speaker 1: Gizelle ain't gonna continue to pay.
Speaker 2: See that's the thing. I will pay, just so we
Speaker 2: can eliminate that gripe. Like, okay, you know what I'm saying, Like,
Speaker 2: I don't need you to be mad because I flaked
Speaker 2: and I didn't pay, you know, so let me just
Speaker 2: h yeah, let me let me pay for your love.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, I'm not that. I'm sick of it. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm sick of it. So guess what. Anybody who does
Speaker 1: not contribute from here on out, y'all not my friends
Speaker 1: no more? The relationship is.
Speaker 2: Over, Oh yeah for sure. Okay. Another one guilty Ennis
Speaker 2: not texting like what you.
Speaker 1: Mean you don't give a thumbs up or a smiley face,
Speaker 1: or you don't text back at.
Speaker 2: All sometimes because you know why, that's horrible. I need
Speaker 2: iPhone to hear me, listen to me iPhone I, Apple,
Speaker 2: I need you to please give us the feature of
Speaker 2: marking our text messages as unread because sometimes I'm driving
Speaker 2: or I'm doing something and I can't respond right away
Speaker 2: and I just want to mark my text message unread,
Speaker 2: but because I don't have the ability to do that.
Speaker 1: Yes, there's a dot.
Speaker 2: No you can't mark it. Oh no.
Speaker 1: At the top it says how many you Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: go ahead.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So it's like once you look at it, it's
Speaker 2: like either respond now or forever hold your peace.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, okay.
Speaker 2: And I have a problem with I'm a little scatter brained,
Speaker 2: a little little yeah, a little I'm a little scatter
Speaker 2: brained and distracted. I get distracted very easily, and so
Speaker 2: like you know, I might open my phone and then
Speaker 2: like be like, oh let me let me text Nicole back,
Speaker 2: and then I open Instagram and I just start and
Speaker 2: then I start scrolling, and then I forget why I
Speaker 2: open my phone.
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, I do do that too, but then you
Speaker 1: have to lie. I do try to, like, yeah, robbing,
Speaker 1: you're the worst.
Speaker 2: So do you go back to your text messages and
Speaker 2: like go through them and say, okay, who do I
Speaker 2: need to reply to. Yeah, am I am? I all
Speaker 2: good on my text messages.
Speaker 1: At some point in the day, I try to go
Speaker 1: through and make sure, like the top text messages I've
Speaker 1: either responded to or I've checked to make sure that
Speaker 1: I've responded to, or whatever the case means.
Speaker 2: So, how many unread text messages do you have?
Speaker 1: So so right now I have none because that drives
Speaker 1: me insane. So I have and we're gonna look, okay, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna pull my little phone. I have three.
Speaker 2: Okay, so I have twenty five, and what yes, I
Speaker 2: have twenty five, and I'm gonna delete this song because
Speaker 2: that's like a alert and you you can actually you
Speaker 2: can only see three on my screen, so that means
Speaker 2: the rest are like so Robin, okay, see this this
Speaker 2: this one, Oh my god, April third.
Speaker 1: Okay, So for the record, okay, so sometimes I'll text
Speaker 1: you right and you won't respond. And so I'm assuming
Speaker 1: you are on the phone or something like you're doing
Speaker 1: something else, like you're talking on the phone pssibly or whatever.
Speaker 1: But I thought you were really doing something. I didn't
Speaker 1: know you were just ignoring me. This is a new
Speaker 1: level to our friends.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't call it ignoring sometimes. Okay, some some of
Speaker 2: these people I ignored.
Speaker 1: You saw that, do better, Robin, just do better, Just
Speaker 1: do better.
Speaker 2: But it's not that I didn't ignore them. On I
Speaker 2: don't know what it is like. I literally might sit
Speaker 2: on the couch and be like, oh, I need to respond,
Speaker 2: and then.
Speaker 1: She starts watching the view the end.
Speaker 2: Okay, someone out there relates. I know that, And then
Speaker 2: you know why I know someone out there relates because
Speaker 2: I had so many people on Instagram respond that their
Speaker 2: pet peeves when their friend does not text them back.
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, yes, okay, So friends.
Speaker 2: Oh can I tell you the story? Can I tell
Speaker 2: you another story? Tell me?
Speaker 1: And then we have to wrap it up.
Speaker 2: I had a friend that texted me and I didn't respond,
Speaker 2: and then she texted me again and I didn't respond.
Speaker 2: She text me It wasn't that I wasn't like I
Speaker 2: wasn't ignoring her. I was just busy, right, and then
Speaker 2: she started like going crazy like calling, calling, calling and
Speaker 2: calling one and so then it turns into like, okay,
Speaker 2: I'm now I'm purposely not responding.
Speaker 1: Robit is a four year old child and she's rebelling. Okay,
Speaker 1: she's rebelling against her friend that just wants to talk to,
Speaker 1: wants to Oh my gosh. So yeah.
Speaker 2: One of the things is adults. One of the pet
Speaker 2: peeves adults acting like petty teens.
Speaker 1: Yes, and that would be Robin Dixon. But she's good.
Speaker 1: I'm so happy that we had this episode today because
Speaker 1: we've been able to pick apart. While Robin needs to.
Speaker 2: Do better, what about you?
Speaker 1: I need to do better too.
Speaker 2: I don't get deep, I don't, I just I just
Speaker 2: want to know what the weather is.
Speaker 1: Your list is a little longer than mine, Okay.
Speaker 2: I mean mine are like fixable. Okay.
Speaker 1: Anyway, I believe that is our episode for today. We
Speaker 1: are reasonably shady, and I think I think today you
Speaker 1: might be shady.
Speaker 2: Robin. I might be told a little bit too much,
Speaker 2: oh my friends.
Speaker 1: Yes, and I think Jiselle might be reasonable. Oh no,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, probably right. But we so appreciate you
Speaker 1: all listening. I think that in our next episode. We
Speaker 1: don't know what our next episode is going to be,
Speaker 1: but I do believe we might have a guest. Yes,
Speaker 1: so you guys have to stay tuned. Thank you so
Speaker 1: much for listening to us. This is Reasonably Shady. I
Speaker 1: am Jaselle Bryant and I Am Robin Dixon D. Hey,
Speaker 1: We're out. We love y'all. Reasonably Shady is a production
Speaker 1: of the Black Effect podcast Network.
Speaker 2: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Speaker 2: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows
Speaker 1: And you can connect with us on social media at
Speaker 1: Robin Dixon ten, Giselle Bryant, and Reasonably Shady.