WEBVTT - FLASHBACK FRIDAY: Hey Girlfriend! (Ep.3) 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:15.320 Hi, miss up. What's up? Okay, this is reasonably shay dude. 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:17.120 I am Jaseelle Bryant. What's up? 0:00:17.160 --> 0:00:20.160 What's up? I am Robin Dixon. Thank you so much 0:00:20.360 --> 0:00:23.320 for joining us for our third episode. 0:00:23.400 --> 0:00:25.840 Oh my gosh, I think we must be doing something right, Robin, 0:00:25.880 --> 0:00:27.120 it's getting scary. We are. 0:00:27.240 --> 0:00:31.159 And guess what what? We pressed record? Yes, and we 0:00:31.240 --> 0:00:36.120 are recording. Yes, everything that we're saying. So last episode. Yeah, 0:00:36.120 --> 0:00:37.920 we talked for like over ten minutes. 0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:42.000 And Robin because it's her job to press record. Okay, fine, 0:00:42.040 --> 0:00:44.040 it might be mine. Who knows if that didn't press it. 0:00:44.080 --> 0:00:46.839 This is a collaborative effort. Okay, all right, all right. 0:00:47.080 --> 0:00:51.360 It takes two Green Eye bandits to press record, all. 0:00:51.400 --> 0:00:54.120 Right now, yes it does. But guess what, we will 0:00:54.120 --> 0:00:57.120 never make that wrong a mistake again? 0:00:57.200 --> 0:00:59.000 Oh no, because I was ready to quit, like I 0:00:59.040 --> 0:01:01.200 was like, okay, my our podcast days are over. 0:01:02.600 --> 0:01:05.960 Oh gosh. All right, so we have a wonderful like 0:01:06.000 --> 0:01:09.399 we have a like explosive kind of episode tonight. 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:12.880 Yes, this is a fun topic. I think I know 0:01:12.959 --> 0:01:14.399 you and I have a lot of input on it. 0:01:14.480 --> 0:01:17.360 I know our listeners are going to be right there 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:21.520 with us. Yes, Yes, agreeing, having you know, same shared experiences, 0:01:21.560 --> 0:01:22.280 all that good stuff. 0:01:22.360 --> 0:01:24.240 Yes, And the topic tonight is or I don't know 0:01:24.280 --> 0:01:28.080 if it's tonight, but the topic for this episode is, hey, girlfriend, 0:01:28.280 --> 0:01:32.679 we're talking all things girlfriend. We're talking do we like them? 0:01:32.880 --> 0:01:37.000 Do we hate them? Do we need new friends? We're 0:01:37.040 --> 0:01:40.039 getting into it, we get into the girlfriend scenario. 0:01:39.720 --> 0:01:41.680 Yes, because you know what, it's so weird, like it 0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:43.360 doesn't matter how old we are. 0:01:43.600 --> 0:01:45.319 Yes, it's still like. 0:01:45.319 --> 0:01:48.760 Navigating the friendship world. It's still kind of awkward, you know. 0:01:49.040 --> 0:01:52.080 You find out that, like, Okay, it doesn't matter how 0:01:52.120 --> 0:01:56.400 old we are, people still have issues saying we still 0:01:56.400 --> 0:01:58.240 need to be sensitive towards them. 0:01:58.480 --> 0:02:00.880 Yes, yes, yes, But before we get into the episode, 0:02:00.880 --> 0:02:05.160 of course, we have our reasonably shady moment of the week. 0:02:11.280 --> 0:02:14.200 So I'm gonna go first, okay, And since the topic 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.840 is about girlfriends, yes, friends, this is going to be 0:02:17.880 --> 0:02:20.639 centered around that. So so my reasonably shady moment goes 0:02:20.680 --> 0:02:26.880 to myself, of course, and it's because I actually picked 0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:30.520 up the phone, okay and called two of my friends, 0:02:30.800 --> 0:02:33.480 you know, like nowadays, like you know, we just text, 0:02:33.680 --> 0:02:36.480 you know, you might say, you know, hey, g are 0:02:36.560 --> 0:02:40.200 you look cute on Instagram or something, but like you 0:02:40.240 --> 0:02:42.440 don't really pick up the phone that much and talk 0:02:42.480 --> 0:02:45.400 to your friends these days, or certain ones or certain 0:02:45.400 --> 0:02:47.240 friends with that talk all the time, like you and I, 0:02:47.360 --> 0:02:50.800 yeah we talk all the time, right right, So this 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:52.280 is where the shady part comes in now. 0:02:52.280 --> 0:02:54.200 Because I was confused. You just pick up the phone 0:02:54.240 --> 0:02:56.560 call on your girlfriends. When is the shake coming in? 0:02:57.040 --> 0:03:00.560 The shady part is it was like thirty seconds into 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:02.799 the call and I'm like, see, you know this why 0:03:02.840 --> 0:03:03.399 I don't. 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:06.880 Call because they was talking about nothing. 0:03:07.160 --> 0:03:10.480 They was just a whining and a complaining, and it's like, 0:03:10.680 --> 0:03:14.480 oh god, now I know why I don't call or 0:03:14.480 --> 0:03:18.000 why I don't pick the phone up instantly. So you know, okay, 0:03:19.320 --> 0:03:21.200 along those same lines, So you have some friends when 0:03:21.200 --> 0:03:22.720 they call, You're like, okay, let me see what she want. 0:03:22.760 --> 0:03:24.280 I'm gonnack, I'm gonna pick up because you know she's 0:03:24.320 --> 0:03:26.640 calling for a reason, right, or it's gonna be like 0:03:26.720 --> 0:03:29.399 you know, you're gonna have a good conversation. Okay, girl, 0:03:29.440 --> 0:03:31.560 let's talk about this man, bad bad man. I'm off. 0:03:31.840 --> 0:03:35.160 Then there's other friends that call and you're like, lord, 0:03:35.200 --> 0:03:37.600 what does she want? I'm gonna god, I don't got time. 0:03:37.680 --> 0:03:39.760 I can't do it right now. I'm cooking dinner. She's 0:03:39.760 --> 0:03:42.200 gonna distract me. I'm trying to like, no, this is 0:03:42.240 --> 0:03:44.520 this is that. Those are the ones that you call 0:03:44.520 --> 0:03:46.600 when you're in the car, like when you're driving long 0:03:46.680 --> 0:03:48.920 distances and you're like, okay, who can I call and 0:03:48.960 --> 0:03:50.880 you're like, let me call her from back. So I'm 0:03:50.880 --> 0:03:52.440 in the car. I call her back, okay, and I'm 0:03:52.480 --> 0:03:56.400 just like, why. 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:57.120 So did you lie to her and make it an 0:03:57.160 --> 0:03:58.839 excuse to get off the phone? 0:03:59.280 --> 0:04:01.080 No? And see that And this is the reasonable part. 0:04:01.120 --> 0:04:02.840 I am a good friend, and I know sometimes my 0:04:02.880 --> 0:04:06.080 friends just want me to listen okay, or you know, 0:04:06.080 --> 0:04:07.640 they just want to hear my voice, or they want 0:04:07.680 --> 0:04:11.000 to hear that I care, and I do care. But 0:04:11.040 --> 0:04:15.720 there's just the limit where I'm like, okay, enough enough, 0:04:15.720 --> 0:04:16.120 it's enough. 0:04:16.160 --> 0:04:18.479 Well Shady Gazelle would have been like, girl, oh my god, 0:04:18.480 --> 0:04:21.160 I gotta go. I got a flat tire, Oh my god, 0:04:21.160 --> 0:04:21.680 I gotta go. 0:04:24.080 --> 0:04:26.960 It was actually when we went to the music video 0:04:27.120 --> 0:04:30.400 that we were at Yes, that's okay, right, who okay, 0:04:30.440 --> 0:04:35.080 that was a good hour and a half. Wow, yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, all. 0:04:35.040 --> 0:04:40.040 Right, So my reasonably shady. Moment of the week is okay. 0:04:40.120 --> 0:04:45.520 So I am a huge proponent of getting rid of 0:04:45.560 --> 0:04:49.240 this thing called COVID. So I got myself a little 0:04:49.240 --> 0:04:52.320 appointment and I got my first shot. My back scene 0:04:52.600 --> 0:04:55.880 is in my arm, and I am mad at the 0:04:56.040 --> 0:05:01.640 entire world. Why because everybody said in itself, your arm 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:04.640 is gonna hurt a little bit, but you're gonna be good. No, 0:05:04.800 --> 0:05:08.960 Giselle was flat on her back, Okay, I was. I 0:05:09.000 --> 0:05:11.960 was on my death I had chills fever, I was shaking. 0:05:12.080 --> 0:05:14.640 My kids were looking over me like, MOI are you 0:05:14.760 --> 0:05:18.479 going to be okay? And I was really not prepared 0:05:18.800 --> 0:05:21.800 for what came with that first shot. Now am I 0:05:21.839 --> 0:05:22.680 getting the second shot? 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:23.800 Of course? I am right that. 0:05:24.000 --> 0:05:26.760 Do I think everybody should be vaccinated? Yes, I do. 0:05:26.800 --> 0:05:28.320 But I just want to say the world is shady 0:05:28.320 --> 0:05:30.800 because y'all lied to me about the symptoms and the 0:05:30.800 --> 0:05:31.480 side effects. 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:34.040 I mean I heard some people say they have side effects. 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:36.200 You hear it all, Oh it's not that bad, Oh 0:05:36.279 --> 0:05:40.040 my arm okay? Or I was tired, I couldn't get 0:05:40.040 --> 0:05:40.760 out of bed all day. 0:05:40.960 --> 0:05:44.200 Yes, well for me, it was bad, and I just 0:05:44.240 --> 0:05:46.200 want people to know that it can be. 0:05:46.160 --> 0:05:49.360 Bad, right, yes, because I think if they don't know that, 0:05:49.400 --> 0:05:51.360 then they think like, oh my god, this thing's going 0:05:51.400 --> 0:05:53.200 to kill me, or you know, I knew I shouldn't 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:55.680 have taken it, or you know, something's wrong. So yeah, 0:05:55.720 --> 0:05:57.320 it probably is good for them to tell you, like, 0:05:58.160 --> 0:05:59.359 this thing is not going to be easy. 0:05:59.440 --> 0:06:01.680 Now I did, after I got to shot, go out 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:03.240 and have drinks. That's a whole nother story, and we 0:06:03.240 --> 0:06:05.479 don't need to talk about that anyway. Let's move into 0:06:05.520 --> 0:06:06.080 the episode. 0:06:06.240 --> 0:06:07.080 Is that in the rule? 0:06:07.839 --> 0:06:11.960 Is there a rule or something? Listen, Okay, it is 0:06:12.080 --> 0:06:15.600 time to start this episode in which we're going to 0:06:15.720 --> 0:06:22.760 talk about our girlfriends. Hey girlfriend girl, how you doing? Okay? So, 0:06:23.480 --> 0:06:26.520 first and foremost, at this point in time in our lives, 0:06:26.920 --> 0:06:29.279 are we Drake? Do we need new friends? 0:06:29.400 --> 0:06:32.160 No new friends? How's it going? No new friends? No 0:06:32.200 --> 0:06:32.760 new friends? 0:06:33.000 --> 0:06:35.560 I can't remember how it goes either rhyb and sing 0:06:35.720 --> 0:06:41.360 the wrong song right now? Okay? So I do appreciate, 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:44.400 for instance, you and I, Robin we met later in life. 0:06:44.480 --> 0:06:47.960 We did, and if I had the thought in my 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:50.840 head okay, no new friends, then our friendship would not 0:06:50.880 --> 0:06:51.279 have happened. 0:06:51.320 --> 0:06:51.720 So true. 0:06:51.880 --> 0:06:54.680 Okay, So I don't want to block myself from new 0:06:54.680 --> 0:06:56.520 people that are coming into my life. You never know 0:06:56.760 --> 0:06:59.039 why God is sending somebody into your life, so I 0:06:59.080 --> 0:07:01.200 never want to do that. However, these women out here 0:07:01.240 --> 0:07:02.080 are crazy, right. 0:07:03.640 --> 0:07:07.440 I think the older we get, the more you know, 0:07:07.520 --> 0:07:11.880 well set in the ways people are, the more like 0:07:12.080 --> 0:07:14.880 and especially if they've experienced some things. It's weird. Like 0:07:14.960 --> 0:07:17.520 I keep thinking, like, oh, it's as adults, you should realize, 0:07:17.560 --> 0:07:20.120 like you know, life is like a box of chocolates, 0:07:20.160 --> 0:07:22.120 and you know, you get tougher and you just kind 0:07:22.120 --> 0:07:24.600 of roll with the punches. But some people let everything 0:07:24.640 --> 0:07:28.280 they go through like scar them, and then they become 0:07:28.400 --> 0:07:32.560 more pressed to like impress people or you know, it's 0:07:32.560 --> 0:07:35.120 like this this crazy need to keep up with the 0:07:35.200 --> 0:07:38.400 joneses and to make sure that you are like, you know, 0:07:38.600 --> 0:07:41.200 the baddest one and or you know whatever. It is 0:07:41.240 --> 0:07:44.720 like competing with people, and I think that's when we 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:47.960 have a problem. But I find and it's you know, 0:07:48.040 --> 0:07:49.720 this is crazy. I never thought I would say this, 0:07:49.800 --> 0:07:53.239 but like I'm making friends with like the sports moms 0:07:53.280 --> 0:07:55.720 that I hang out with, you know, from your kids, 0:07:56.160 --> 0:08:00.640 from your kids teams, right, football teams, Yeah, baskets and 0:08:00.640 --> 0:08:02.760 it's like, because those are women that I spend a 0:08:02.920 --> 0:08:06.480 lot of time with, right, and y'all have something in common, 0:08:06.520 --> 0:08:09.160 which is the game that your kids are playing, right, 0:08:09.200 --> 0:08:12.320 exactly our kids. Our kids might become friends, and but 0:08:12.360 --> 0:08:14.280 it's something it's like, it's funny because you're like, Okay, 0:08:15.080 --> 0:08:16.920 when I was growing up, but I've made friends with 0:08:16.960 --> 0:08:18.600 this person or of what I've been friends with this 0:08:18.640 --> 0:08:23.280 person in college. Not necessarily like you wouldn't have chosen 0:08:23.360 --> 0:08:25.600 to be that be friends with some of these people, 0:08:25.640 --> 0:08:29.120 but because you're around them all the time, you're communicating 0:08:29.120 --> 0:08:31.000 with them all the time, you end up you know, 0:08:31.960 --> 0:08:33.719 like you know, I kind of share before in a 0:08:33.800 --> 0:08:35.679 hotel room drinking all night with. 0:08:35.679 --> 0:08:38.840 People, and that was episode one. If y'all miss that 0:08:39.120 --> 0:08:41.960 Robin drinks with these women that she meets and they're 0:08:41.960 --> 0:08:43.560 in hotel rooms and they don't make it to the 0:08:43.559 --> 0:08:45.680 games the next day to see their kids play. 0:08:45.720 --> 0:08:47.000 We do, but do like with the one eye open, 0:08:47.080 --> 0:08:47.800 they're delirious. 0:08:47.840 --> 0:08:51.920 They have no idea what's happening. Okay, So another question 0:08:52.160 --> 0:08:55.520 is when you meet these new people, do you google them? 0:08:56.960 --> 0:09:01.400 Well, it depends, Okay, I feel like when you meet 0:09:01.480 --> 0:09:04.480 someone that is that comes in the room and is 0:09:04.520 --> 0:09:08.000 talking about what they do and who they are, and 0:09:08.040 --> 0:09:10.520 what they have and what their man has, and right 0:09:10.600 --> 0:09:13.760 where they live. Then yeah, I'm googling you, yes, right, 0:09:13.800 --> 0:09:19.079 and I'm googling your house address. 0:09:19.240 --> 0:09:21.800 Okay, okay, okay, I'm not going that far. But I 0:09:21.840 --> 0:09:25.679 kind of feel like if you're in my personal space 0:09:25.960 --> 0:09:30.120 and potentially in my intimate setting, right, I don't know 0:09:30.120 --> 0:09:32.280 what's gonna happen. The cops might come. I don't know 0:09:32.280 --> 0:09:34.840 if you if you're a drug dealer girlfriend, if you 0:09:34.880 --> 0:09:37.360 had a criminal background and all of a sudden the 0:09:37.360 --> 0:09:39.120 Feds caught up with you, Like, I don't want to 0:09:39.120 --> 0:09:40.199 be around when the feds come. 0:09:40.520 --> 0:09:43.320 But that's not going to be on Google. Oh, it's 0:09:43.360 --> 0:09:46.480 just not. So it's not going to be like You're 0:09:46.520 --> 0:09:49.480 going to be like Susie Jones is her boyfriend is 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:50.240 a drug dealer? 0:09:51.400 --> 0:09:54.520 About it would be on Google because this has happened. 0:09:54.600 --> 0:09:57.400 I had a friend and she had a case pending. 0:09:57.960 --> 0:09:59.680 Oh okay, and so that's a case. 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:00.000 Serch. 0:10:00.440 --> 0:10:02.520 Oh well, I didn't it just ship. It just came 0:10:02.559 --> 0:10:04.320 It was in the Washington Post. Okay, so it just 0:10:04.360 --> 0:10:07.920 came up when I googled her and so so. Then 0:10:08.000 --> 0:10:10.520 I knew. Okay, if I go out with her and 0:10:10.640 --> 0:10:14.679 just have some drinks, there's a potential that somebody might 0:10:14.720 --> 0:10:17.160 come that night lock her up. 0:10:17.840 --> 0:10:21.440 True, But are you going to be doing illegal activity 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:21.920 with that friend? 0:10:22.160 --> 0:10:24.240 No, I'm not doing any illegal activity. But I just 0:10:24.280 --> 0:10:25.360 need to know because. 0:10:25.120 --> 0:10:27.679 I'm just gonna get locked up for associations with her. 0:10:27.720 --> 0:10:29.200 I don't I don't want to be in the paper 0:10:29.240 --> 0:10:31.360 like Jaselle Bryant was there when so and so got 0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:32.760 locked up. No, I don't want that. 0:10:33.000 --> 0:10:34.920 So instead, he's just going to be like out to 0:10:35.040 --> 0:10:36.679 drinks and like your head is on a swift. 0:10:38.880 --> 0:10:42.520 I'm not going when and when she invites me for drinks, 0:10:42.520 --> 0:10:43.120 I'm not going. 0:10:43.240 --> 0:10:44.160 You're not going to be her friend? 0:10:44.400 --> 0:10:48.319 Oh right, that's mean okay, No, I'm not. No, And 0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:51.800 that's when Drake comes in now friends exactly. 0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:53.520 Okay, Okay, I mean I think right. So, if it's 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:57.120 a new friend she's got some a criminal record, yeah 0:10:57.200 --> 0:11:01.520 you might want to you know, stand back, yes, yes, 0:11:02.000 --> 0:11:03.520 But if it's a friend that you've had for a 0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:06.200 while and she got into a little bit of trouble, 0:11:06.400 --> 0:11:07.800 I say you continue to support her. 0:11:07.880 --> 0:11:12.679 Okay, all right, So you know, because I know, and 0:11:12.720 --> 0:11:15.480 it bothers the freak out of me. That a lot 0:11:15.520 --> 0:11:19.440 of times, especially when when we meet people, they feel 0:11:19.440 --> 0:11:23.559 like they have something to prove, right, Yes, for whatever reason, 0:11:23.559 --> 0:11:25.960 I don't know. Maybe it's because we on TV. I 0:11:25.960 --> 0:11:27.600 don't know what it is, but they feel like they 0:11:27.679 --> 0:11:29.480 got something to prove, so they want to come to 0:11:29.559 --> 0:11:35.400 the conversation talking about all this stuff like bragging, yes, 0:11:35.520 --> 0:11:36.400 like name dropping. 0:11:36.800 --> 0:11:40.080 That is an instant turn off for me, Like you 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:41.400 you want me to turn my ears off? 0:11:41.640 --> 0:11:42.240 Oh? 0:11:42.280 --> 0:11:46.040 Like they're like, just you know, my ears don't work 0:11:47.080 --> 0:11:49.920 as soon as you start talking about who you know 0:11:50.240 --> 0:11:52.320 and what you did and what you have, And. 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:56.440 I'm no, No. The best way to make friends, I think, 0:11:56.520 --> 0:12:00.720 is to just be normal. Just be you. Don't try 0:12:00.720 --> 0:12:03.480 to be something you're not, just be who you are. 0:12:04.000 --> 0:12:04.200 Right. 0:12:04.280 --> 0:12:04.840 And it's weird. 0:12:04.840 --> 0:12:07.720 It's like I think some people might hear that were 0:12:07.720 --> 0:12:10.440 We're like, you know, we don't want to hear people bragging, like, oh, well, 0:12:10.679 --> 0:12:12.679 maybe you're jealous of what they're what's coming out of 0:12:12.720 --> 0:12:15.240 their mouth. It's like, no, I want to have a 0:12:15.320 --> 0:12:18.760 connection with someone because I connect with them with their personality. 0:12:19.880 --> 0:12:23.439 I don't want it to be Okay, Well, I'm impressed 0:12:23.480 --> 0:12:25.120 by what you have and what you do, so I 0:12:25.160 --> 0:12:27.120 want to be your friends so I can benefit from 0:12:27.160 --> 0:12:28.120 what you have and what you. 0:12:28.120 --> 0:12:30.200 Do, right, you know, No, that's a no. 0:12:30.480 --> 0:12:34.200 Yeah. And there's been times I remember, like, you know, 0:12:34.559 --> 0:12:37.040 years ago, when I was, when we were young and dumb, 0:12:37.040 --> 0:12:39.199 we would buy new cars like all the time. Yes, 0:12:39.640 --> 0:12:42.679 And I remember like buying a car and I'm a 0:12:42.760 --> 0:12:44.920 type I don't like, I don't go around bragging about 0:12:44.920 --> 0:12:46.920 what I have. And and the next time my friends 0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:48.600 saw me, they were like, oh my god, why didn't 0:12:48.600 --> 0:12:50.200 you tell me you got a new car? And I'm like, 0:12:50.320 --> 0:12:52.199 why would I tell you that I got. 0:12:52.000 --> 0:12:57.200 A new car? Yes, And people who asked that I 0:12:57.240 --> 0:12:59.560 got to look at them weird because it's like, why 0:12:59.679 --> 0:13:03.040 you why? Why is that the topic of conversation? Why 0:13:03.240 --> 0:13:06.280 is materialistic things the only topic of conversation? 0:13:06.559 --> 0:13:08.840 Exactly? So that's the type of stuff like where my 0:13:08.920 --> 0:13:12.360 antennas are up when the focus is on materialistic things, 0:13:12.520 --> 0:13:14.000 or know what you have or what you do or 0:13:14.040 --> 0:13:15.439 who you know. I mean, there are some people and 0:13:15.520 --> 0:13:18.800 we we know we have mutual friends or mutual acquaintances 0:13:18.880 --> 0:13:21.400 that they come in the room and like, yeah, I 0:13:21.480 --> 0:13:24.280 was with Bobby Brown the other night, and then Al 0:13:24.360 --> 0:13:28.560 Sharpton called me, and then our shop didn't call you, yes, 0:13:29.000 --> 0:13:30.960 and they don't know you. And then I was I 0:13:31.000 --> 0:13:33.440 was at a restaurant and Hillary Clinton walked over and. 0:13:33.400 --> 0:13:36.319 Was like I think I met you before. Like it's 0:13:36.320 --> 0:13:39.720 like girls, star stop. 0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:43.760 We're not impressed, we're actually turned off. Yes, yes, if 0:13:43.760 --> 0:13:48.040 it comes up in casual conversation, right, you know, Like 0:13:48.120 --> 0:13:49.600 so I don't want people to think like, oh my god, 0:13:49.600 --> 0:13:52.319 well I can't share anything about my life, but it's 0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:53.559 a certain way to do it. 0:13:56.520 --> 0:13:59.200 I have to make an admission. I don't like talking 0:13:59.200 --> 0:14:02.079 about anything deep, okay, or anything spiritual. 0:14:02.240 --> 0:14:02.560 Okay. 0:14:02.559 --> 0:14:03.160 I just don't. 0:14:03.320 --> 0:14:05.440 I know that's real bad. That's not a surprise to me. 0:14:06.679 --> 0:14:09.000 It's not surprised to Robbing or anyone else that knows me. 0:14:09.160 --> 0:14:10.679 I don't have no deep conversation. 0:14:10.920 --> 0:14:12.920 And so people probably think you do because you were 0:14:13.000 --> 0:14:16.240 like a preacher's wife. They probably think like you sit around. 0:14:16.200 --> 0:14:19.440 And just have deep bossom. Yeah. No, I'm not sitting 0:14:19.440 --> 0:14:22.480 around reciting gospel hymns. 0:14:22.520 --> 0:14:22.800 Okay. 0:14:22.840 --> 0:14:25.080 I'm not doing that. And I'm just I don't want 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:28.880 anything that's like I have to, like really super think 0:14:28.920 --> 0:14:34.040 about it. So talk to me only if I just 0:14:34.120 --> 0:14:35.920 met you, about surface things. 0:14:36.160 --> 0:14:40.280 Okay. So I'm so so word to anyone that Meetszelle 0:14:40.320 --> 0:14:43.400 wants to be her friend. Yes, surface her about the weather, 0:14:45.080 --> 0:14:50.080 talk to her about her favorite police to vacation and restaurants, 0:14:51.120 --> 0:14:53.800 her favorite designers. 0:14:53.480 --> 0:14:57.520 My shoes, talking about my shoes, my earrings, favorite restaurant. 0:14:57.840 --> 0:15:00.480 And I don't know what the last and you watched 0:15:00.480 --> 0:15:00.960 on Netflix? 0:15:01.040 --> 0:15:02.040 Yes, the latest Netflix? 0:15:02.240 --> 0:15:04.840 Yeah, that's it. Okay, if you talk about anything outside 0:15:04.840 --> 0:15:06.320 of that, I would have had to have known you. 0:15:06.280 --> 0:15:07.560 For a very long time. 0:15:08.080 --> 0:15:11.680 Well, so there's levels to girlfriends, friendships, there's levels. 0:15:11.360 --> 0:15:14.880 Yes, But I feel like, what about business? What if 0:15:14.920 --> 0:15:18.560 there's a woman that is entrepreneur and you know you 0:15:18.600 --> 0:15:20.840 want to you all kind of just start talking about 0:15:20.840 --> 0:15:21.880 what you do and. 0:15:21.920 --> 0:15:22.440 I like that. 0:15:22.520 --> 0:15:23.280 Okay, you like that. 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:25.040 I like that. But you can't lie. 0:15:25.640 --> 0:15:27.760 No, no, no, we're not lying. We're not bragging. No lying, 0:15:27.800 --> 0:15:28.280 no bragging. 0:15:28.440 --> 0:15:30.000 Okay, all right, So I like that. So if you're 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:32.640 coming to me and we just met and we're bonding 0:15:32.680 --> 0:15:36.480 over business, the best way to you know, start up 0:15:36.480 --> 0:15:40.320 a business being an entrepreneur being the pitfalls of being 0:15:40.320 --> 0:15:42.280 a black woman in this in this world call I 0:15:42.320 --> 0:15:43.720 mean this thing called life cool. 0:15:43.760 --> 0:15:46.240 Stay tuned for that episode that's coming Yes. 0:15:46.080 --> 0:15:48.520 That's that's coming up. I love that, okay, because I 0:15:48.520 --> 0:15:50.760 always want to see black women win, right. But the 0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:53.400 minute you get deep with it and start talking about 0:15:53.520 --> 0:15:54.600 I was, I was, so. 0:15:54.600 --> 0:15:58.960 What if she's like and God told me that. 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:01.920 No, the minute you can deep with it, I'm out 0:16:01.920 --> 0:16:05.040 and tuned out. I have tuned the freak out, I am. 0:16:05.400 --> 0:16:06.080 I'm not listening. 0:16:06.080 --> 0:16:08.640 That's the reason why she's a multi millionaire, because she 0:16:08.880 --> 0:16:11.760 told her to do to open that business. 0:16:12.600 --> 0:16:15.160 Okay, fine, I'll listen then, Okay, all right, okay, but 0:16:15.560 --> 0:16:20.280 you can't. There's again, there's levels to girlfriend friendship. Level 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:25.400 number one talk about nothing, okay, level number two you 0:16:25.440 --> 0:16:26.600 can get throw some business in. 0:16:26.720 --> 0:16:27.040 Okay. 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:28.000 But you know what I do? 0:16:28.040 --> 0:16:31.120 You hate? I hate when I go to a I mean, 0:16:31.160 --> 0:16:33.360 it doesn't happen that much anymore because now we're on 0:16:33.440 --> 0:16:35.800 TV and people recognize us. But in the past, we 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:38.680 go to like the social events and you're just meeting 0:16:38.760 --> 0:16:42.280 random people and the very very very first question out 0:16:42.280 --> 0:16:44.360 of their mouth is what do you do? 0:16:45.000 --> 0:16:46.840 So what do you do for a living, I say nothing. 0:16:47.120 --> 0:16:49.400 I still on the couch me too. 0:16:49.560 --> 0:16:53.120 I'll be like, well, thank you for asking, but I 0:16:53.160 --> 0:16:54.360 am a stay at home woman. 0:16:57.440 --> 0:16:59.800 I just find it very pretentious when people come and 0:16:59.800 --> 0:17:01.240 they ask that kind of right, because. 0:17:01.000 --> 0:17:02.640 They want you to ask them what they do because 0:17:02.680 --> 0:17:05.359 they're like, you know, a high powered they're like a 0:17:05.400 --> 0:17:08.080 partner at a law firm, and they like tell you that, right, 0:17:08.160 --> 0:17:10.040 Like I just I hate that question, And maybe I 0:17:10.040 --> 0:17:12.399 hate it because like I never I didn't really have 0:17:12.480 --> 0:17:13.480 something I wanted to talk. 0:17:13.359 --> 0:17:15.760 Because Robin was actually at at home on this show. 0:17:16.160 --> 0:17:18.280 If I was like a surgeon, I'd be like, yes, 0:17:18.760 --> 0:17:20.880 I am a brain surgeon, and I'd be like, thank 0:17:20.920 --> 0:17:21.280 you for. 0:17:21.200 --> 0:17:25.439 Asking, right, right, Okay, So there's always I find like 0:17:25.480 --> 0:17:27.639 in a group of girlfriends, it's this girlfriends that you 0:17:27.720 --> 0:17:30.639 have in different categories, right for sure? So this girlfriends 0:17:30.640 --> 0:17:33.280 that you want to hang out with and have drinks with, sore? 0:17:34.040 --> 0:17:39.040 Are there friends that you like them better when they're drunk? Right? 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:43.440 Like there's some friends that they're they're non drunk self, 0:17:43.840 --> 0:17:47.639 I can't stand oh, but when they're drunk, Oh, they're amazing, 0:17:47.920 --> 0:17:48.680 right right. 0:17:48.800 --> 0:17:50.080 That's not good though. 0:17:50.200 --> 0:17:52.280 It's not good at all. But I only want to 0:17:52.320 --> 0:17:53.560 be around you when you're drunk. 0:17:53.640 --> 0:17:56.840 So then do you like push drinks to their way? 0:17:57.119 --> 0:17:59.679 And I only want to be around you if drinks 0:17:59.680 --> 0:18:01.120 are being served. 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:05.560 Right, So so then that's a surface friend. Okay, yes, right, yes, 0:18:05.680 --> 0:18:07.840 that's that's a surface friend, Like you have no desire 0:18:07.880 --> 0:18:09.800 to talk to that person on the phone or to 0:18:09.840 --> 0:18:12.879 hear about what they're going through or you know, to 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:16.320 talk about what your you know, right, no, yeah. 0:18:16.440 --> 0:18:19.440 So and there's a friend that we both know and 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:22.480 she doesn't want to drink anymore, right, oh yeah, and 0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:25.280 she's a dud. She I don't want to be around her. 0:18:25.560 --> 0:18:28.600 Like when she was drinking. Oh, she was the life 0:18:28.680 --> 0:18:31.840 of the party, she was the best woman in the room. Right, 0:18:31.920 --> 0:18:33.760 But now that she doesn't want to drink anymore, I 0:18:33.760 --> 0:18:34.880 don't want to see her. 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:36.720 I know. But then you have to worry about people 0:18:36.760 --> 0:18:38.760 like that, like what's going on in their real life 0:18:38.800 --> 0:18:43.159 that they can't be fun and enjoyable when they're not drinking. 0:18:43.680 --> 0:18:46.160 But see, that's not this is this is girlfriends. I'm 0:18:46.200 --> 0:18:48.200 not married to you, that's not my problem, Like I'm 0:18:48.240 --> 0:18:50.000 not you know what I'm saying. We just friends. You know, 0:18:50.000 --> 0:18:51.520 you gotta you gotta worry about your own problems on 0:18:51.560 --> 0:18:52.080 your own time. 0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:56.000 Yes, you do. Friend. Yeah, she's a surface friend. 0:18:56.359 --> 0:18:59.520 Yes, I am the worst. Now, then you have. 0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:02.240 I have some friends where I'm like, please don't get drunk. 0:19:03.200 --> 0:19:08.120 Why because it's like because then they become the one that's. 0:19:07.920 --> 0:19:13.000 Like, oh my god, I'm so upset. My life is 0:19:13.040 --> 0:19:14.320 so crazy, like like. 0:19:14.280 --> 0:19:18.520 They become emotional then and then they ruin your drunkenness, like. 0:19:18.480 --> 0:19:21.400 They ruin your you're high, yeah, you. 0:19:21.359 --> 0:19:23.920 Know, and it's like, oh my god, what are you doing? 0:19:24.080 --> 0:19:26.359 Okay that whoever that is in your life, she's not 0:19:26.400 --> 0:19:29.000 going out with us. I don't want her around, yeah, 0:19:29.000 --> 0:19:32.040 because I don't want no crying drunks at the club. 0:19:33.119 --> 0:19:36.040 That's crazy. Okay, I'm so horrible. 0:19:35.720 --> 0:19:38.879 Right So yeah, that like, but that's that can be 0:19:38.920 --> 0:19:41.479 like your real good friend in real life, and then 0:19:42.000 --> 0:19:43.840 put some drinks up in her and she's just like 0:19:44.440 --> 0:19:45.280 a DeBie downer. 0:19:45.640 --> 0:19:52.680 Right right now, do you feel like girlfriends tell you 0:19:52.760 --> 0:19:56.960 the truth as it relates to their their whole factor, right, 0:19:57.760 --> 0:20:02.880 their their whole meeter right, Because that's really important, right, 0:20:02.920 --> 0:20:05.360 And the reason why it's important is because if her 0:20:05.400 --> 0:20:08.120 home meter is off the charts, She's going to sleep 0:20:08.119 --> 0:20:12.679 with your man, no question. So it's always like when 0:20:12.760 --> 0:20:15.560 she starts talking about stuff she's doing, it's like I'm 0:20:15.600 --> 0:20:18.560 side eying her because at any given moment, she's going 0:20:18.600 --> 0:20:21.480 to try to sleep with the dude I'm right now. 0:20:21.600 --> 0:20:25.679 Especially if she said her boyfriend was married, I'm always 0:20:25.680 --> 0:20:30.840 feeling like you might try to sleep with I'm not married. 0:20:30.840 --> 0:20:33.359 But you just you have no roles, you have no boundaries. 0:20:33.760 --> 0:20:34.680 I need rolls. 0:20:35.040 --> 0:20:38.159 Well, okay, So the question is, so you meet a 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:42.080 new friend, do you ask them what their home meter is? 0:20:42.280 --> 0:20:43.479 No, you just listen. 0:20:43.480 --> 0:20:46.040 When do you Okay, you just listen to the things 0:20:46.040 --> 0:20:50.080 she starts proping questions, you ask yes. 0:20:50.200 --> 0:20:54.280 You know, hey girl, you know you married? No? Who 0:20:54.280 --> 0:20:55.879 you saying? Oh, I'm saying so and so. 0:20:56.200 --> 0:20:58.600 But then this is another question that goes along with that. So, 0:20:58.640 --> 0:21:01.080 if you are in a relationship, or if you're married 0:21:01.160 --> 0:21:04.080 or in a relationship, do you even want to invite 0:21:04.200 --> 0:21:08.399 new friends around that are single you know? Or do 0:21:08.480 --> 0:21:11.359 you want most of your new friends to be in 0:21:11.440 --> 0:21:12.280 a relationship? 0:21:12.800 --> 0:21:19.439 Hmmm, you know the plot thick. I think I think 0:21:20.000 --> 0:21:23.840 that yes, if I was married, I would want my 0:21:24.000 --> 0:21:26.879 new girlfriends to also be married or in a like 0:21:26.920 --> 0:21:32.119 significant relationship. I don't want no straggly single girls just around. 0:21:31.800 --> 0:21:33.920 Right, because then that doesn't even work. So it's like, oh, 0:21:34.600 --> 0:21:36.960 all right, honey, you're talking to your man. All right, honey, 0:21:36.960 --> 0:21:40.840 I'm about to go out with Tracy. Who's Tracy? Oh? 0:21:41.400 --> 0:21:43.680 Tracy, Tracy is my family? Can I play the part 0:21:43.680 --> 0:21:44.000 of one? 0:21:44.080 --> 0:21:44.280 Yeah? 0:21:44.320 --> 0:21:48.280 Who's Tracy? I ain't never heard nobody named Tracy. 0:21:48.400 --> 0:21:51.240 Well, I just met Tracy. We were at the mall 0:21:51.320 --> 0:21:53.679 and I bumped into her and we were shopping, and like, 0:21:53.760 --> 0:21:56.120 she just wants to hang out and where y'all going. 0:21:56.600 --> 0:22:00.760 We're just gonna get some drinks. Mmm, what time you 0:22:00.840 --> 0:22:03.400 coming back? I mean, I don't know. We'll be out 0:22:03.400 --> 0:22:04.560 like a couple of hours. 0:22:04.600 --> 0:22:05.919 Maybe it's Tracy. 0:22:05.960 --> 0:22:09.800 Well, so she married, what's up with I don't think so? 0:22:10.160 --> 0:22:13.439 Yeah. No, Now Wine is not gonna say no, but 0:22:13.520 --> 0:22:15.000 he is going to be He's going. 0:22:14.960 --> 0:22:16.920 To ask fifty questions and call me fifty times. 0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:19.800 Yeah, he's going. Okay, Just for those of y'all don't 0:22:19.800 --> 0:22:25.080 know why Dixon Wine calls Robin a thousand times a day. Okay, 0:22:25.680 --> 0:22:27.840 Like we've been sitting here doing this podcast. Now we're 0:22:27.880 --> 0:22:30.240 we're on minute twenty two. He's called four times. No, yeah, okay, 0:22:30.240 --> 0:22:34.720 she's okay, I'm lying, But Win calls Robin. Now if 0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:37.040 one thanks, Robin is out doing something she ain't supposed 0:22:37.040 --> 0:22:40.800 to be doing. That puts some calls or repeat. Okay, 0:22:41.080 --> 0:22:43.199 Wan Dixon is going. And Wan is the type of 0:22:43.200 --> 0:22:44.840 guy that, do you think something on the side of 0:22:44.840 --> 0:22:45.879 the road, and no he doesn't. 0:22:45.880 --> 0:22:46.200 Okay. 0:22:46.359 --> 0:22:48.479 Why is the type of guy that if you don't answer, 0:22:49.040 --> 0:22:52.200 he keeps calling back and keeps calling back until you 0:22:52.280 --> 0:22:55.600 ain't gonna call my friend? Yes, yes, and then he 0:22:55.640 --> 0:22:58.240 will call anybody that she said she was with. Okay, 0:22:58.280 --> 0:23:01.480 that's just Win. That's the nature of the relationship. No judgment. 0:23:01.560 --> 0:23:03.080 It's crazy, but no judgment. 0:23:03.160 --> 0:23:07.399 Okay, he's just worried. Okay, thanks. The man at the 0:23:07.440 --> 0:23:10.680 gas station kidnapped me. Okay. 0:23:10.720 --> 0:23:14.640 But I totally agree. I feel like girlfriends that are 0:23:14.720 --> 0:23:17.520 not that don't have the same demographic that you are 0:23:17.560 --> 0:23:20.959 living should not come into your circle. I mean, I 0:23:21.040 --> 0:23:24.760 just think that that's you're you're setting yourself up for problems, right. 0:23:25.080 --> 0:23:27.800 I agree, unless you have like mutual friends that can 0:23:27.880 --> 0:23:30.119 vouch for that person. You know, I just feel like, 0:23:30.320 --> 0:23:35.119 not a random that is totally living the single whole life. 0:23:35.560 --> 0:23:38.000 No, that's not going to work, Like no at all, No, 0:23:38.040 --> 0:23:41.480 not at all, and and it so so we're saying 0:23:41.520 --> 0:23:45.000 all this to say, it becomes very difficult for you 0:23:45.160 --> 0:23:47.399 to really a trust people that are going to be 0:23:47.440 --> 0:23:51.159 in your circle. I don't think that, you know, I 0:23:51.200 --> 0:23:54.600 get real nervous about what people. You know, if I 0:23:54.640 --> 0:23:56.720 have a conversation with somebody, like how they take that 0:23:56.760 --> 0:24:00.480 conversation later, like how that you know, I mean, like 0:24:01.359 --> 0:24:03.880 mm hmmm, I think it's a great conversation, but they 0:24:03.920 --> 0:24:06.399 walk away and they're like, Justelle's an asshole, And I'm like, 0:24:06.480 --> 0:24:08.680 but I thought it was good. I thought we had 0:24:08.760 --> 0:24:12.359 jokes and everything. So, you know, I always get feel 0:24:12.359 --> 0:24:16.399 weird about it sometimes. But the reality of it is 0:24:16.440 --> 0:24:18.480 you have to really have your spidy senses up with 0:24:18.560 --> 0:24:21.920 all people, not just girlfriends, but like all people, because 0:24:22.560 --> 0:24:24.480 people are crazy outide in these streets. 0:24:24.880 --> 0:24:28.439 I'm trying to remember the last time I met a 0:24:28.480 --> 0:24:32.320 new friend, not like outside of the show. Yes, not 0:24:32.320 --> 0:24:37.359 because of the show that I connected with and like 0:24:37.480 --> 0:24:44.359 really developed a friendship with Hm. You know what I 0:24:44.400 --> 0:24:51.359 would say like Vicky Vicky Irvin, who is I met 0:24:51.440 --> 0:24:56.439 her on a business matter, yes, and that kind of 0:24:57.119 --> 0:24:58.480 you know, created a friendship. 0:24:58.640 --> 0:25:03.160 Yes. And Vicky Irvin, you did your lipstick with correct. 0:25:02.920 --> 0:25:05.360 Right, right, So we had so I did a lipstick 0:25:05.480 --> 0:25:10.480 lip gloss collaboration with her. So she's an entrepreneur. My 0:25:10.600 --> 0:25:13.480 real estate mentor introduced me to her because he thought 0:25:13.920 --> 0:25:16.320 that she could be helpful to me because he knew 0:25:16.359 --> 0:25:19.919 that I was just you know, getting into the entrepreneurial space. Yes, 0:25:20.119 --> 0:25:23.440 and so so that friendship developed, but it was it 0:25:23.520 --> 0:25:27.200 started more. It's I feel like nowadays at our age, 0:25:27.200 --> 0:25:29.160 when we meet people it's because of a purpose. 0:25:29.560 --> 0:25:32.359 Yeah. Yeah, it's got to be. You guys have to 0:25:32.359 --> 0:25:34.919 be aligned in some kind of way, right. So so 0:25:34.960 --> 0:25:38.160 if it's not business, it might be because, like you said, 0:25:38.200 --> 0:25:41.520 my kids, because kids or your partners might know each 0:25:41.520 --> 0:25:45.440 other and then you guys bond over that. Otherwise it 0:25:45.640 --> 0:25:47.640 just like I'm not going and get my hair done 0:25:47.680 --> 0:25:50.440 and I meet you at the salon and we become friends. Right, 0:25:50.480 --> 0:25:51.199 That's not happening. 0:25:51.280 --> 0:25:53.800 Yeah, no, no, definitely, And it's and it's like kind 0:25:53.800 --> 0:25:56.280 of weird when people are like, oh, we should exchange numbers, 0:25:56.320 --> 0:25:59.480 and You're like, no, we shouldn't. No, we should not, 0:26:00.080 --> 0:26:04.760 because first of all, I'm already not the best friend 0:26:04.840 --> 0:26:07.000 that I can be to the friends that I already have, 0:26:07.240 --> 0:26:11.760 you know, because I'm just kidding. 0:26:11.840 --> 0:26:12.639 Robin is great to me. 0:26:12.760 --> 0:26:15.760 You probably these days get most of my friend time. 0:26:15.880 --> 0:26:16.560 That is true. 0:26:17.200 --> 0:26:19.400 My other friends are probably hating on you. 0:26:19.520 --> 0:26:25.040 I know. But actually that happened to me in the gym. 0:26:25.080 --> 0:26:29.040 So a very nice lady girl she walked up to 0:26:29.080 --> 0:26:32.359 me and she started asking me. She saw that my 0:26:32.440 --> 0:26:34.919 house is being renovated, and she asked me about it, 0:26:34.960 --> 0:26:37.440 and then she talked about the fact that she's got 0:26:37.800 --> 0:26:41.400 she knows somebody who you know, has a renovation business 0:26:41.480 --> 0:26:43.359 or something. And then she was like, oh, you're so 0:26:43.440 --> 0:26:46.480 super cool. We should hang out. Let's exchange numbers. Yeah 0:26:46.480 --> 0:26:47.680 that's no, I'm not that super good. 0:26:47.720 --> 0:26:48.560 No, I'm not. 0:26:49.600 --> 0:26:52.480 And I and she made me give her my number, 0:26:52.560 --> 0:26:54.640 like it was kind of like her phone was out 0:26:54.680 --> 0:26:56.280 and I had my phone in my hand and like 0:26:56.440 --> 0:26:59.720 I didn't know what to do. I couldn't back away. Yeah, 0:26:59.880 --> 0:27:01.800 I had to give her my number. And it was 0:27:01.880 --> 0:27:03.800 just like so weird, And I thought to myself, Oh 0:27:03.840 --> 0:27:06.119 my god, I hope she doesn't call me. 0:27:06.280 --> 0:27:07.679 Did she know? Oh? 0:27:07.720 --> 0:27:09.080 Okay, thank god? 0:27:09.440 --> 0:27:10.600 Right's weird. 0:27:10.920 --> 0:27:13.720 But but when things like that happen, it just makes 0:27:13.760 --> 0:27:16.160 me feel like this is not authentic. Like I want 0:27:16.160 --> 0:27:19.800 to meet girlfriends and it's an authentic relationship, you know, 0:27:20.040 --> 0:27:21.440 it's a great feeling. 0:27:21.280 --> 0:27:25.840 Right, It's not like pushed on you exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0:27:26.160 --> 0:27:29.800 Digital interaction? What the hell is that? Social media? 0:27:30.480 --> 0:27:33.080 Okay, so I'm supposed to meet people on social media? Okay, 0:27:33.080 --> 0:27:35.240 for the record, let's just say, for the record, I 0:27:35.280 --> 0:27:36.960 feel like I have enough girlfriends in my life. 0:27:37.000 --> 0:27:40.719 Do you Oh I have tons? Yes, I have tons? 0:27:40.800 --> 0:27:44.080 Yes, okay, but so are you asking if on social 0:27:44.080 --> 0:27:45.520 media somebody reaches out? 0:27:45.920 --> 0:27:49.199 So okay, So say, on social media you have like 0:27:50.000 --> 0:27:55.520 acquaintances kind of and they're trying. It's like, does that 0:27:55.640 --> 0:28:00.199 muddy your your interaction with them in real life? So 0:28:01.240 --> 0:28:07.560 you have people who I think are more friendly on 0:28:07.600 --> 0:28:11.800 social media than they are in real life, Like they 0:28:11.880 --> 0:28:16.439 might see you come afar and like not speak, and 0:28:16.440 --> 0:28:17.800 then on social media. 0:28:17.960 --> 0:28:19.800 They're all like, hey, girl, how would you know? 0:28:23.080 --> 0:28:23.639 You just know? 0:28:23.760 --> 0:28:24.239 I don't know. 0:28:24.400 --> 0:28:28.200 I feel like that's like people not being comfortable. Oh 0:28:28.240 --> 0:28:30.719 you know, like you, like, okay, if you see someone 0:28:30.960 --> 0:28:33.920 who's commenting on your social media, but when you see 0:28:33.960 --> 0:28:35.960 them in real life, they're barely like coming up to 0:28:36.000 --> 0:28:36.720 you and saying hi. 0:28:36.880 --> 0:28:40.120 Oh okay, so they're social media friends, right, okay, right. 0:28:40.360 --> 0:28:43.120 But then but they're like almost intimidated in real life 0:28:43.120 --> 0:28:43.720 to come up to you. 0:28:43.960 --> 0:28:45.920 Yeah, that's that's weird. So it's kind of like you're 0:28:46.000 --> 0:28:49.520 hiding behind your social media handle exactly. Yeah, that's I 0:28:49.560 --> 0:28:52.000 find that to be a stalker exactly. Okay, Yeah, I. 0:28:51.960 --> 0:28:54.440 Mean it's I just think it's more of like maybe 0:28:54.440 --> 0:28:57.000 they are socially awkward or maybe they're intimidated. But I 0:28:57.040 --> 0:29:00.640 have experienced that where people will interact with me more 0:29:01.360 --> 0:29:04.680 on social media than if they were actually face to face. 0:29:04.880 --> 0:29:08.760 Right, okay, Okay, So I do have some girlfriends and 0:29:09.960 --> 0:29:13.240 unfortunately they're like sorority sisters, right. 0:29:13.560 --> 0:29:16.160 And unfortunately they're sororities. 0:29:16.240 --> 0:29:18.080 Well there was a reason. I mean, I love the 0:29:18.080 --> 0:29:20.960 fact that they're my sorority sisters, but like that's the 0:29:21.040 --> 0:29:23.000 reason why they've been in my life forever. 0:29:23.320 --> 0:29:23.440 Right. 0:29:24.160 --> 0:29:26.680 But then as time goes by, you know, as you 0:29:26.680 --> 0:29:30.360 get older, you change, you grow, and you see people 0:29:30.400 --> 0:29:33.760 who don't change and grow and then you realize they're losers, 0:29:33.880 --> 0:29:36.479 right is that terrible to say? Like they're kind of 0:29:36.520 --> 0:29:38.840 like they're stuck. They're stuck. 0:29:39.120 --> 0:29:41.080 They're stuck. They haven't grown. 0:29:40.880 --> 0:29:44.280 They haven't evolved, and you're at a totally different place. 0:29:44.400 --> 0:29:46.719 So how do you deal with do you do you 0:29:46.760 --> 0:29:48.640 cut those people out of your life? Don't listen to 0:29:48.680 --> 0:29:52.400 me because I cut people like I got a machete 0:29:52.440 --> 0:29:53.760 out here and I just be cut. 0:29:53.920 --> 0:29:55.400 No, you know why you don't cut them out? 0:29:55.760 --> 0:29:55.920 Why? 0:29:55.920 --> 0:29:58.400 I guess guess what one day you might be in 0:29:58.440 --> 0:30:01.320 a totally different place, be a loser and you yes, 0:30:02.240 --> 0:30:06.280 and you might need your friends to love you unconditionally. Right, 0:30:06.760 --> 0:30:11.280 So I have you know, my sorrowers that I love 0:30:11.320 --> 0:30:15.160 dearly that I probably would never have even have even 0:30:15.280 --> 0:30:18.040 met if I weren't in the sorority, you know, So 0:30:18.080 --> 0:30:20.520 I wouldn't would have never like really been friends with them, 0:30:21.080 --> 0:30:24.160 and we are totally different people. I mean, the sorority 0:30:24.200 --> 0:30:26.280 is a good thing because it kind of forces you 0:30:26.400 --> 0:30:30.160 to receive people where they are, to love them regardless, 0:30:30.200 --> 0:30:32.720 and to kind of be their friend regardless, like whether 0:30:32.800 --> 0:30:34.600 or not you would be their friend or not. True 0:30:34.720 --> 0:30:39.160 outside of the sorority, and so I think, okay, it's 0:30:39.240 --> 0:30:42.160 you know, you can't be like you didn't level up yet, girl, 0:30:42.720 --> 0:30:44.560 So I'm not gonna be your friend. 0:30:44.680 --> 0:30:46.800 No, not you didn't level up. But it's kind of 0:30:46.840 --> 0:30:51.480 like the the we're in a different space mentally, right. Okay, 0:30:51.520 --> 0:30:53.000 So I'm just gonna say it to the people. If 0:30:53.040 --> 0:30:54.960 you want to cut people out your life because God 0:30:55.000 --> 0:30:56.920 brings people in your life or a reason in the season, 0:30:57.320 --> 0:30:59.200 then go ahead on and do it. I'm not mad 0:30:59.240 --> 0:31:02.760 at you, but reasonable Robin will not. 0:31:03.080 --> 0:31:05.120 Just don't be mad when other people cut you out 0:31:05.280 --> 0:31:06.200 of their life. 0:31:06.680 --> 0:31:10.000 Okay, listen, I'm bem begging people to cut me out 0:31:10.040 --> 0:31:12.600 they life. I'm like, please, can I have it in writing? 0:31:13.040 --> 0:31:14.040 Cut me out right? 0:31:14.040 --> 0:31:15.160 Are you sure? Yes? 0:31:15.800 --> 0:31:19.720 Oh my God, leave me alone. But I do feel like, 0:31:20.600 --> 0:31:23.200 you know, there comes a time and place where you 0:31:23.240 --> 0:31:28.080 want people that can add value, right, and you want 0:31:27.800 --> 0:31:31.240 you want to surround yourself with people that are constantly 0:31:31.400 --> 0:31:34.480 allowing you to be your greater self. Right, And sometimes 0:31:34.480 --> 0:31:36.520 the girlfriends can't come on that journey. 0:31:37.000 --> 0:31:41.720 But but why is it just because so you're saying, mentally, 0:31:41.760 --> 0:31:45.560 they're like they're negative or they are because just because 0:31:45.560 --> 0:31:48.400 they might not be on your level, they might still 0:31:48.440 --> 0:31:50.800 be able to provide some sort of support to you 0:31:50.960 --> 0:31:55.400 or some sort of you know, encouragement or you know friendship. 0:31:55.800 --> 0:31:57.920 Right, Yes, yes, it's true, and. 0:31:57.920 --> 0:32:00.440 Sometimes you want to keep that friend who was there 0:32:00.800 --> 0:32:04.320 with you before you are you were the person you 0:32:04.360 --> 0:32:04.800 are today. 0:32:04.840 --> 0:32:07.080 Okay, But if we've known each other for like twenty 0:32:07.080 --> 0:32:09.040 five years and you're still talking about the same shit 0:32:09.080 --> 0:32:11.080 that you were talking about when I met you twenty 0:32:11.080 --> 0:32:12.760 five years ago, then there's a problem. 0:32:12.760 --> 0:32:14.000 Oh yeah, well that's a big problem. 0:32:14.080 --> 0:32:16.440 Right, Like if I feel like and it's not that 0:32:16.560 --> 0:32:19.160 I've leveled up and you stayed the same, it's like, 0:32:19.560 --> 0:32:21.040 mentally we're just not there. 0:32:21.280 --> 0:32:23.720 Right, So have you said that to them? No? 0:32:23.920 --> 0:32:25.520 I thought all that. I think that's rude if I 0:32:25.560 --> 0:32:28.920 tell people you are a loser. 0:32:29.120 --> 0:32:31.320 Well, see, that's a conversation like what is okay to 0:32:31.360 --> 0:32:33.760 say to your friends and what's not okay to say 0:32:33.760 --> 0:32:36.320 to your friends, because sometimes your friends need to hear 0:32:36.360 --> 0:32:39.400 the hard truth and okay, if they don't receive it 0:32:40.280 --> 0:32:43.000 the way you intended, then that's on them. 0:32:43.120 --> 0:32:44.800 That is very true. And to be honest with you, 0:32:44.840 --> 0:32:46.240 I am very honest with my friends. 0:32:46.280 --> 0:32:49.960 Really, okay, I think, And do they appreciate your honesty? Hell? 0:32:50.040 --> 0:32:55.160 No, hate me, No, I'm kidding. I think they do. 0:32:55.200 --> 0:32:57.040 And you want to know why, because I have so 0:32:57.160 --> 0:33:00.800 many friends that I've had forever, and they tell me 0:33:00.960 --> 0:33:04.480 things that I've said to them ten fifteen years later 0:33:04.840 --> 0:33:07.720 that helped them in that moment that I didn't know 0:33:07.800 --> 0:33:10.000 help them. But they tell me, hey, Giselle, I remember 0:33:10.120 --> 0:33:12.040 you said this to me a long time ago, and 0:33:12.120 --> 0:33:14.479 then I broke up with that loser dude and I 0:33:14.480 --> 0:33:17.160 found this other guy or whatever, whatever the scenario is. 0:33:17.760 --> 0:33:20.640 They repeat to me verbat in what I said to them, 0:33:21.240 --> 0:33:24.040 and so, oh, I tell you. 0:33:24.080 --> 0:33:24.800 I was an oracle. 0:33:25.360 --> 0:33:28.640 This is what I know. I'm going off the deep end. Okay, fine, 0:33:28.760 --> 0:33:31.360 but I do. I'm getting deep in y'all know I 0:33:31.360 --> 0:33:34.840 don't get deep but I need to get back to that. 0:33:34.880 --> 0:33:36.840 I need to get back to just like being brutally 0:33:36.880 --> 0:33:40.080 honest with people when I know you can do better 0:33:40.080 --> 0:33:41.080 and be a better person. 0:33:41.360 --> 0:33:44.800 Right. Oh, for sure, I think, especially as you get older, 0:33:46.680 --> 0:33:48.520 you're not helping your friend at off. You can't be 0:33:48.560 --> 0:33:52.200 honest with your friend, Yes, if you can't encourage them to, 0:33:52.600 --> 0:33:56.080 you drop the negativity the toxicity and to do better. Yes, 0:33:56.160 --> 0:33:59.520 and if your friend does not want to receive those messages, 0:34:00.120 --> 0:34:02.560 then yeah, maybe it's time to drop them as a 0:34:02.600 --> 0:34:06.040 friend because you can't. You don't know how to be 0:34:06.080 --> 0:34:08.640 a good friend to someone that doesn't want to receive 0:34:08.680 --> 0:34:10.560 your friendship, right right, you know? 0:34:10.960 --> 0:34:12.040 And I think this is good. 0:34:12.160 --> 0:34:14.400 And friendship is not always about being a yes person. 0:34:14.480 --> 0:34:17.600 It's not about always agreeing with your friend liking what 0:34:17.640 --> 0:34:20.360 they do. You know. Of course we want to celebrate 0:34:20.360 --> 0:34:22.600 our friends and support our friends. But if there's something 0:34:22.640 --> 0:34:26.160 that we can you know, what is it constructive criticism? Yes, 0:34:26.280 --> 0:34:29.920 if we can constructively criticize our friends. I know I 0:34:29.960 --> 0:34:34.160 want to be constructively criticized. You know, I don't. I 0:34:34.160 --> 0:34:36.640 don't receive it very often because I am quite perfect. 0:34:37.800 --> 0:34:43.200 Okay, okay, So and this is this is actually for 0:34:43.360 --> 0:34:47.239 me and you because you know, we've been friends, and 0:34:47.280 --> 0:34:51.520 we we have we're in this group, this circle. You know, 0:34:51.600 --> 0:34:54.080 we'll just refer to the show and a lot of 0:34:54.120 --> 0:34:59.479 times they think that we know things about each other 0:35:00.400 --> 0:35:04.600 that therefore that the world doesn't know. Therefore, that's why 0:35:04.600 --> 0:35:06.839 we're friends, because we got dirt on each other, right, 0:35:07.480 --> 0:35:12.680 which is true. But that's not why we're friends. Meaning 0:35:12.800 --> 0:35:15.319 I know stuff about Robin that I'll never say, and 0:35:15.400 --> 0:35:19.400 vice versa. But that's what friendship is. But the question 0:35:19.600 --> 0:35:22.120 is when you meet somebody new, like how quickly do 0:35:22.239 --> 0:35:26.640 you tell them like your business, your bi business, your 0:35:26.640 --> 0:35:30.359 personal biousness, because that's a trust thing, right You got 0:35:30.360 --> 0:35:32.560 to trust that person because you got to know you're 0:35:32.560 --> 0:35:35.040 telling them and they might tell one other person, but 0:35:35.080 --> 0:35:36.640 they can't tell the world. 0:35:36.600 --> 0:35:39.520 Right, I don't. That is so hard because I feel like, 0:35:39.600 --> 0:35:43.080 for me, I'm not going to tell you anything until 0:35:43.080 --> 0:35:47.719 you tell me something, and so then it becomes like 0:35:47.800 --> 0:35:49.040 what comes first. 0:35:48.760 --> 0:35:49.680 The chicken or the egg? 0:35:49.800 --> 0:35:51.520 Yes, and I know you ain't telling me that, Like 0:35:51.560 --> 0:35:54.239 I don't even know how, Like I think it takes 0:35:54.239 --> 0:35:57.200 a minute, but like a very long time for people 0:35:57.239 --> 0:36:01.000 to really start sharing unless you're a really open person 0:36:01.040 --> 0:36:01.880 and you don't care. 0:36:02.080 --> 0:36:06.440 Right, But I don't know. I mean, I'm not. I 0:36:06.680 --> 0:36:09.880 I always find that people spill their guts to me. 0:36:10.000 --> 0:36:13.640 I do not know why, but they do. 0:36:13.719 --> 0:36:15.120 And then she tells me everyone. 0:36:15.280 --> 0:36:17.080 And I did tell Robin. But I mean, they spill 0:36:17.120 --> 0:36:19.719 their guts and I think maybe they feel like that 0:36:19.840 --> 0:36:23.279 is their way to build a trust and then maybe 0:36:23.320 --> 0:36:25.120 they're thinking, I'm gonna spell my guts, but I'm done 0:36:25.160 --> 0:36:26.600 you right now. I don't care when I meet you, 0:36:26.760 --> 0:36:30.480 how I meet you. I'm never spelling my guts. But 0:36:30.560 --> 0:36:36.960 I feel like it's it's very difficult for women to 0:36:37.120 --> 0:36:39.160 feel a sense of comfort, so because you do want 0:36:39.160 --> 0:36:41.040 to have somebody that you can share a bunch of 0:36:41.080 --> 0:36:43.759 stuff with and that is going to support you and 0:36:43.840 --> 0:36:46.439 not judge you, and that's in your corner. So it's 0:36:46.480 --> 0:36:49.400 just a it's just a very fine line, and I 0:36:49.440 --> 0:36:52.040 have I haven't been able to balance it or figure 0:36:52.080 --> 0:36:52.799 it out right. 0:36:52.880 --> 0:36:56.160 I don't think there's a real right time. You know, 0:36:56.200 --> 0:36:59.399 it's not like, oh well exactly on the twenty eighth 0:36:59.560 --> 0:37:03.160 day after meeting the friend. No, it's okay to share, 0:37:03.400 --> 0:37:05.279 you know. I think it's more of an intuition thing. 0:37:05.480 --> 0:37:08.600 I think it's more of just, you know, the vibe 0:37:08.600 --> 0:37:13.560 between the two people where you feel, okay, this person 0:37:15.160 --> 0:37:18.560 knows me or cares about me differently or more than 0:37:18.960 --> 0:37:21.560 someone else. Like it's so weird, like you can't really 0:37:21.600 --> 0:37:25.880 explain why certain people are closer friends than others. You know, 0:37:26.200 --> 0:37:29.640 you can have a friend circle of eight or ten 0:37:29.680 --> 0:37:32.320 people and there might be that one or two people 0:37:32.360 --> 0:37:34.480 that you just vibe better with. 0:37:34.440 --> 0:37:38.040 Yes, for whatever reason, for whatever reason, maybe it's it's 0:37:38.080 --> 0:37:42.200 it's pheromones, it's just you know, chemistry, it's whatever. But 0:37:42.280 --> 0:37:43.160 like what it is? 0:37:43.280 --> 0:37:45.400 We write what is it? What is it? 0:37:45.600 --> 0:37:48.560 I don't know. I don't know, but I just want 0:37:48.600 --> 0:37:50.040 to put out there because you know, I'm thinking about 0:37:50.080 --> 0:37:53.640 my girlfriends and just relationships. And I'm the girl that 0:37:53.719 --> 0:37:57.120 if I see a man cheating, I'm gonna tell you okay, okay, 0:37:57.360 --> 0:37:59.600 and I'm going to get my phone and take a 0:37:59.640 --> 0:38:00.919 picture video. 0:38:00.880 --> 0:38:03.719 But see and pictures. I feel like you have to 0:38:03.920 --> 0:38:05.799 if you're going to tell her, you got to have 0:38:05.840 --> 0:38:06.880 the pictures in the video. 0:38:07.080 --> 0:38:08.840 Yes, And I'm going to like let you know, and 0:38:09.120 --> 0:38:10.040 I don't want to discuss it. 0:38:10.120 --> 0:38:13.560 Yeah, yeah, yes, because there's there. There have been many, many, 0:38:13.560 --> 0:38:17.560 many situations where a girlfriend sees something or hears something 0:38:17.640 --> 0:38:21.360 and then she tells the friend and the man lies 0:38:21.440 --> 0:38:25.319 and oh no, that didn't happen, she lies, ring you 0:38:25.320 --> 0:38:27.400 don't need to be friends with her anymore, and then 0:38:27.719 --> 0:38:30.839 you're the one that's true, the messenger, the one that's 0:38:30.880 --> 0:38:31.359 on the out. 0:38:31.680 --> 0:38:31.960 Okay. 0:38:32.040 --> 0:38:35.600 Yes, So I feel like it's hard. I think it's 0:38:35.680 --> 0:38:36.960 strict on the relationship. 0:38:36.960 --> 0:38:39.840 It depends on the relationship. But if that's your good girlfriend, 0:38:39.880 --> 0:38:42.279 I think it's your right to let her know what's 0:38:42.280 --> 0:38:42.600 going on. 0:38:42.640 --> 0:38:46.879 So then do you think friends should when they kind 0:38:46.920 --> 0:38:48.960 of start their friendship or at some point in the 0:38:49.000 --> 0:38:52.000 friendship say look, girl, I'm just telling you, if you 0:38:52.080 --> 0:38:54.600 hear something or see something about my man, then tell me, like, 0:38:54.640 --> 0:38:57.040 do you think that should be a spoken Should that 0:38:57.120 --> 0:39:00.239 be spoken? Do you think it should be? Like, all right, 0:39:00.320 --> 0:39:03.920 let's everybody sit down in circle and okay, Robin, do 0:39:03.960 --> 0:39:06.680 you want to know? Okay, Jeselle, do you want to know? Okay, 0:39:06.719 --> 0:39:07.799 Susie do you want to know? 0:39:08.600 --> 0:39:10.600 You know what I mean? And it's like some people 0:39:10.640 --> 0:39:11.239 don't want to know. 0:39:11.360 --> 0:39:13.880 Let's write it down. We're gonna take notes so that 0:39:13.960 --> 0:39:16.320 we know. And so then when so when something happens, 0:39:16.600 --> 0:39:18.480 all the you know, ten girls in the group and 0:39:18.480 --> 0:39:20.400 the nine girls get on a conference call. All right, y'all. 0:39:20.760 --> 0:39:25.400 So Stephanie says she wants to know, So who's going 0:39:25.480 --> 0:39:29.439 to tell her? You know what I'm saying, like, yeah, 0:39:29.440 --> 0:39:33.840 I was I'm almost considering like texting my girlfriends and saying, hey, guys, 0:39:33.840 --> 0:39:35.280 we need to like sit down. 0:39:35.239 --> 0:39:36.960 Because they're gonna be like, who you talking about my man? 0:39:37.040 --> 0:39:40.200 You talking about my man? Ain't my man? They call 0:39:40.280 --> 0:39:43.080 him home every night. I know he ain't doing it, 0:39:43.400 --> 0:39:44.960 but I think that should be disclosed. 0:39:45.040 --> 0:39:47.759 I actually think that should be like, okay, a girlfriend rule, 0:39:47.840 --> 0:39:50.600 because I have had and I'll stay. Like in college, 0:39:52.120 --> 0:39:54.239 Wan I was, I was pledging delt and I was 0:39:54.239 --> 0:39:58.600 never around and Jan cheated on me, oh with a 0:39:58.640 --> 0:39:59.960 girl at Maryland. 0:40:01.040 --> 0:40:04.000 Right break, I can't. 0:40:03.520 --> 0:40:05.359 Breaking news one chid. You don't mean when when we 0:40:05.360 --> 0:40:09.280 were in college and one of so after I crossed, 0:40:09.680 --> 0:40:13.080 one of my line sisters found out and it was 0:40:13.160 --> 0:40:16.960 a whole like, you know, I didn't know that my 0:40:17.800 --> 0:40:20.600 out of the ten of us, nine of my line 0:40:20.640 --> 0:40:23.000 sisters are having these power owls about what do we do? 0:40:23.080 --> 0:40:25.880 What do we say? You know what I mean? And 0:40:25.920 --> 0:40:28.960 then it and it turned into a whole mess because 0:40:29.800 --> 0:40:32.000 I just needed my one line sister to come to 0:40:32.040 --> 0:40:34.720 me and tell me. But then it just turned into 0:40:35.280 --> 0:40:37.359 it was a mess in my relationship with that one 0:40:37.360 --> 0:40:39.200 line sister was kind of messed up for a little 0:40:39.200 --> 0:40:40.880 bit and blah blah blah blah blah. 0:40:40.880 --> 0:40:44.040 All that I held that's why he put you pledged delta. 0:40:44.080 --> 0:40:46.960 That's a whole other story. But anyway, I mean no, 0:40:47.280 --> 0:40:49.359 like that's a mess. And then the reason why it's 0:40:49.400 --> 0:40:51.279 some messes because you know they're sitting around talking about 0:40:51.320 --> 0:40:52.480 you for days. 0:40:52.560 --> 0:40:54.400 But so I feel like if you just if everyone 0:40:54.440 --> 0:40:56.399 just puts it out there in the air, you know, 0:40:56.480 --> 0:40:58.600 to your girlfriends, to your friends circle, and say, look, 0:40:58.640 --> 0:41:00.359 this is what it is, so we don't have to 0:41:00.360 --> 0:41:03.000 we can skip that part, you know, so tell me 0:41:03.320 --> 0:41:04.440 or don't tell me. 0:41:04.520 --> 0:41:05.799 Let's talk about it. That's true. 0:41:05.840 --> 0:41:07.680 Act like you ain't never seen it. Yes, I don't 0:41:07.680 --> 0:41:08.080 need to know. 0:41:08.200 --> 0:41:10.040 Okay, well I'm telling you now, Robin, you need to 0:41:10.040 --> 0:41:10.359 tell me. 0:41:10.400 --> 0:41:11.480 So I'm sending text messages. 0:41:11.520 --> 0:41:15.440 Okay, So text mess text message your girlfriend group tonight, 0:41:15.520 --> 0:41:17.799 y'all and make that decision. Do you want to know? 0:41:18.320 --> 0:41:19.600 Check the box? Yes, all right? 0:41:19.640 --> 0:41:21.920 And I think that's a good takeaway for everyone listening, 0:41:21.960 --> 0:41:24.360 Like I think that's a good that's actually like a 0:41:24.400 --> 0:41:27.480 good conversation to have, like when you have your girls 0:41:27.600 --> 0:41:29.960 night and you're drinking wine and so that's put that 0:41:30.040 --> 0:41:30.719 topic out there. 0:41:30.800 --> 0:41:34.160 Yes, do you want to know? All right? So, typically 0:41:34.239 --> 0:41:36.840 at the end of our episode. We have our reasonably 0:41:37.040 --> 0:41:40.680 shady people other week for that episode, but today we 0:41:40.800 --> 0:41:43.560 have some changes. Okay. So we have put out to 0:41:43.600 --> 0:41:48.239 the universe some friendship pet Peeves. We put out there 0:41:48.280 --> 0:41:51.800 on our social media, and you all have answered yes 0:41:52.040 --> 0:41:55.680 in a very big way. Okay, So friendship pet Peeves 0:41:56.080 --> 0:41:59.240 is what we're going to be discussing on, yes, right. 0:41:59.120 --> 0:42:02.560 Now, So we are going to go into let's see, 0:42:02.600 --> 0:42:06.279 I'm going to tell you the number of people that 0:42:06.640 --> 0:42:09.799 said one uppers. 0:42:09.480 --> 0:42:11.759 Okay, So okay, let's let's talk about bunkers. Okay, what 0:42:11.920 --> 0:42:15.399 one opers is? Hey, girl, I just bought a new 0:42:15.440 --> 0:42:17.600 car and then you say. 0:42:17.640 --> 0:42:20.640 Oh my god, well I'm getting a new car tomorrow 0:42:21.200 --> 0:42:22.440 and it's going to have. 0:42:23.640 --> 0:42:25.920 I'll get a new car tomorrow and it is like 0:42:26.040 --> 0:42:27.200 the Bentley of the Bentleys. 0:42:27.320 --> 0:42:28.880 Yes, I'm the only one that hasn't. 0:42:29.040 --> 0:42:31.279 Yes, they only made two in the United States and 0:42:31.360 --> 0:42:33.200 I have one and Oprah has the other one, right, 0:42:34.080 --> 0:42:35.000 like crazy right? 0:42:35.320 --> 0:42:37.200 Or like you buy a house and then your friend's like, well. 0:42:37.160 --> 0:42:39.120 I'm going to go buy a house, and yes, how 0:42:39.160 --> 0:42:41.480 many square feed is your house? Minus four thousand, oh 0:42:41.560 --> 0:42:45.480 minus five thousand? Girls like that, like that's some bullshit 0:42:45.520 --> 0:42:47.239 and stop it right, like save it. 0:42:47.480 --> 0:42:49.960 The thing is like your friend, whenever your friend has 0:42:50.000 --> 0:42:53.160 some news, like celebrate your friend in that moment it 0:42:53.239 --> 0:42:56.239 about your friend, yeah, glets them have their moment, and 0:42:56.280 --> 0:42:59.759 then okay, a week later, if the conversation arises on 0:42:59.800 --> 0:43:02.160 this topic, then you can share your news, but like, 0:43:02.760 --> 0:43:05.799 let your friend have their moment. 0:43:05.800 --> 0:43:10.640 Yes, and stop talking about yourself yes, yes, okay. 0:43:10.200 --> 0:43:15.879 Which you know leads to a lot of people said selfishness. Okay, 0:43:15.920 --> 0:43:19.600 so what does that mean and not reciprocating support. So 0:43:20.360 --> 0:43:25.440 some friends call you when they have something going on 0:43:25.680 --> 0:43:27.560 that they either want to you know, talk about or 0:43:27.600 --> 0:43:31.239 tell you about. And then when the conversation, when that 0:43:31.239 --> 0:43:34.400 conversation about themselves ends, what a conversation is over. And 0:43:34.440 --> 0:43:37.040 it's like, right, they don't they don't care about what's 0:43:37.040 --> 0:43:39.200 going on in your world. They don't hear about. 0:43:39.160 --> 0:43:41.840 You know, I might be a victim of this, and 0:43:41.880 --> 0:43:44.920 I'm gonna tell you why. So everybody knows I have 0:43:44.920 --> 0:43:48.600 a friend named Cal, and every night me and Cal 0:43:48.680 --> 0:43:51.719 talk and he says, okay, Zoul, start talking about you. 0:43:52.760 --> 0:43:55.600 That's how he starts the conversation. And I'm like, it's 0:43:55.600 --> 0:43:57.840 like hello, hey, hey, all right, start talking about you, 0:43:57.920 --> 0:44:00.799 jizou just and I'm like cow noh, stop, Like I 0:44:00.800 --> 0:44:02.759 want to know about your day. He's like, the day 0:44:02.880 --> 0:44:07.120 was good, Okay, go oh my god, it's it's actually 0:44:07.200 --> 0:44:10.719 funny now. But it made me think, like, Okay, do 0:44:10.800 --> 0:44:14.440 I just give him like my side of my world? 0:44:14.880 --> 0:44:17.759 And do I never check in with his? And probably? 0:44:17.960 --> 0:44:20.319 So I am happy that he made me aware so 0:44:20.360 --> 0:44:21.400 that I don't do that anymore. 0:44:21.520 --> 0:44:26.040 Okay, yes, that's good. Another one in this. I am 0:44:26.239 --> 0:44:29.760 so a lot of these. I'm starting to reevaluate myself 0:44:29.800 --> 0:44:32.600 as a friend because I'm starting to think I'm a horrible. 0:44:32.280 --> 0:44:36.360 Friend because people said friends that are late. 0:44:36.360 --> 0:44:40.000 Friends that are late, friends that are flaky Robin Robin 0:44:40.320 --> 0:44:43.080 can I can I tell you? Like my flake meter 0:44:43.280 --> 0:44:46.960 is off off the charts, blake off the chart. I literally. 0:44:47.920 --> 0:44:48.680 One time. 0:44:50.360 --> 0:44:53.320 It was going to Las Vegas to celebrate a friend's birthday. 0:44:53.440 --> 0:44:56.759 Uh huh, like New Year's Eve, Las Vegas. I didn't 0:44:56.760 --> 0:44:58.080 feel like packing, so I didn't go. 0:44:58.600 --> 0:44:59.440 Did you have a ticket? 0:44:59.640 --> 0:45:02.840 Yes, the ticket a hotel room I pay. Here's here's 0:45:02.880 --> 0:45:05.640 my portion for the hotel room. I'll get you know 0:45:05.800 --> 0:45:08.080 all that. I'm like I don't feel like packing. I'm 0:45:08.080 --> 0:45:08.399 not going. 0:45:08.480 --> 0:45:13.319 Robin is the worst, the worst, the worse. You have 0:45:13.400 --> 0:45:15.160 to do better. You have to do better, to do better, 0:45:15.160 --> 0:45:17.160 but at least you pay. Because my pet peeve is 0:45:17.560 --> 0:45:21.000 my friends that don't want to pay for nothing, right y'all. 0:45:21.080 --> 0:45:25.080 Bitches are broke, okay, and I'm mad at it, and 0:45:25.400 --> 0:45:27.080 Gizelle ain't gonna continue to pay. 0:45:27.200 --> 0:45:30.040 See that's the thing. I will pay, just so we 0:45:30.040 --> 0:45:33.320 can eliminate that gripe. Like, okay, you know what I'm saying, Like, 0:45:33.360 --> 0:45:34.920 I don't need you to be mad because I flaked 0:45:35.000 --> 0:45:37.160 and I didn't pay, you know, so let me just 0:45:38.600 --> 0:45:41.000 h yeah, let me let me pay for your love. 0:45:42.719 --> 0:45:45.240 Yeah no, I'm not that. I'm sick of it. Okay, 0:45:45.680 --> 0:45:49.359 I'm sick of it. So guess what. Anybody who does 0:45:49.360 --> 0:45:51.600 not contribute from here on out, y'all not my friends 0:45:51.680 --> 0:45:53.160 no more? The relationship is. 0:45:53.120 --> 0:45:58.719 Over, Oh yeah for sure. Okay. Another one guilty Ennis 0:45:59.200 --> 0:46:01.520 not texting like what you. 0:46:01.560 --> 0:46:04.080 Mean you don't give a thumbs up or a smiley face, 0:46:04.400 --> 0:46:06.000 or you don't text back at. 0:46:05.840 --> 0:46:10.879 All sometimes because you know why, that's horrible. I need 0:46:10.960 --> 0:46:15.480 iPhone to hear me, listen to me iPhone I, Apple, 0:46:16.160 --> 0:46:19.359 I need you to please give us the feature of 0:46:19.760 --> 0:46:24.960 marking our text messages as unread because sometimes I'm driving 0:46:25.760 --> 0:46:28.959 or I'm doing something and I can't respond right away 0:46:29.480 --> 0:46:31.600 and I just want to mark my text message unread, 0:46:32.080 --> 0:46:34.960 but because I don't have the ability to do that. 0:46:35.280 --> 0:46:37.480 Yes, there's a dot. 0:46:37.800 --> 0:46:39.200 No you can't mark it. Oh no. 0:46:39.480 --> 0:46:41.719 At the top it says how many you Okay, all right, 0:46:41.760 --> 0:46:42.120 go ahead. 0:46:42.200 --> 0:46:44.839 Yeah. So it's like once you look at it, it's 0:46:44.880 --> 0:46:47.520 like either respond now or forever hold your peace. 0:46:47.719 --> 0:46:49.000 Oh okay, okay. 0:46:49.120 --> 0:46:53.560 And I have a problem with I'm a little scatter brained, 0:46:54.280 --> 0:46:57.160 a little little yeah, a little I'm a little scatter 0:46:57.200 --> 0:47:00.040 brained and distracted. I get distracted very easily, and so 0:47:00.120 --> 0:47:02.279 like you know, I might open my phone and then 0:47:02.400 --> 0:47:07.359 like be like, oh let me let me text Nicole back, 0:47:07.640 --> 0:47:13.360 and then I open Instagram and I just start and 0:47:13.440 --> 0:47:15.960 then I start scrolling, and then I forget why I 0:47:16.000 --> 0:47:16.560 open my phone. 0:47:16.719 --> 0:47:18.680 Yes, okay, I do do that too, but then you 0:47:18.719 --> 0:47:21.560 have to lie. I do try to, like, yeah, robbing, 0:47:21.560 --> 0:47:22.080 you're the worst. 0:47:22.080 --> 0:47:25.080 So do you go back to your text messages and 0:47:25.320 --> 0:47:26.759 like go through them and say, okay, who do I 0:47:26.760 --> 0:47:29.000 need to reply to. Yeah, am I am? I all 0:47:29.040 --> 0:47:30.440 good on my text messages. 0:47:30.640 --> 0:47:32.839 At some point in the day, I try to go 0:47:32.880 --> 0:47:35.440 through and make sure, like the top text messages I've 0:47:35.440 --> 0:47:39.360 either responded to or I've checked to make sure that 0:47:39.400 --> 0:47:41.120 I've responded to, or whatever the case means. 0:47:41.120 --> 0:47:43.000 So, how many unread text messages do you have? 0:47:43.080 --> 0:47:45.120 So so right now I have none because that drives 0:47:45.160 --> 0:47:48.680 me insane. So I have and we're gonna look, okay, okay, 0:47:48.719 --> 0:47:50.400 I'm gonna pull my little phone. I have three. 0:47:51.080 --> 0:47:55.880 Okay, so I have twenty five, and what yes, I 0:47:55.920 --> 0:47:57.799 have twenty five, and I'm gonna delete this song because 0:47:57.800 --> 0:48:01.080 that's like a alert and you you can actually you 0:48:01.120 --> 0:48:04.480 can only see three on my screen, so that means 0:48:04.640 --> 0:48:08.280 the rest are like so Robin, okay, see this this 0:48:08.280 --> 0:48:10.760 this one, Oh my god, April third. 0:48:11.600 --> 0:48:15.080 Okay, So for the record, okay, so sometimes I'll text 0:48:15.120 --> 0:48:18.279 you right and you won't respond. And so I'm assuming 0:48:19.320 --> 0:48:22.760 you are on the phone or something like you're doing 0:48:22.800 --> 0:48:26.200 something else, like you're talking on the phone pssibly or whatever. 0:48:26.360 --> 0:48:28.720 But I thought you were really doing something. I didn't 0:48:28.719 --> 0:48:33.080 know you were just ignoring me. This is a new 0:48:33.160 --> 0:48:33.839 level to our friends. 0:48:36.280 --> 0:48:40.759 I wouldn't call it ignoring sometimes. Okay, some some of 0:48:40.800 --> 0:48:41.839 these people I ignored. 0:48:42.040 --> 0:48:47.480 You saw that, do better, Robin, just do better, Just 0:48:47.600 --> 0:48:48.360 do better. 0:48:48.800 --> 0:48:51.000 But it's not that I didn't ignore them. On I 0:48:51.000 --> 0:48:54.319 don't know what it is like. I literally might sit 0:48:54.400 --> 0:48:56.960 on the couch and be like, oh, I need to respond, 0:48:57.560 --> 0:48:57.879 and then. 0:48:58.239 --> 0:49:01.879 She starts watching the view the end. 0:49:02.080 --> 0:49:06.799 Okay, someone out there relates. I know that, And then 0:49:06.800 --> 0:49:09.080 you know why I know someone out there relates because 0:49:09.120 --> 0:49:11.919 I had so many people on Instagram respond that their 0:49:11.920 --> 0:49:14.080 pet peeves when their friend does not text them back. 0:49:14.280 --> 0:49:17.960 Yes, okay, yes, okay, So friends. 0:49:17.560 --> 0:49:19.920 Oh can I tell you the story? Can I tell 0:49:19.920 --> 0:49:20.799 you another story? Tell me? 0:49:21.080 --> 0:49:21.880 And then we have to wrap it up. 0:49:21.880 --> 0:49:24.040 I had a friend that texted me and I didn't respond, 0:49:24.080 --> 0:49:26.040 and then she texted me again and I didn't respond. 0:49:26.040 --> 0:49:28.400 She text me It wasn't that I wasn't like I 0:49:28.440 --> 0:49:31.680 wasn't ignoring her. I was just busy, right, and then 0:49:31.719 --> 0:49:34.040 she started like going crazy like calling, calling, calling and 0:49:34.040 --> 0:49:37.360 calling one and so then it turns into like, okay, 0:49:37.400 --> 0:49:39.640 I'm now I'm purposely not responding. 0:49:43.239 --> 0:49:47.600 Robit is a four year old child and she's rebelling. Okay, 0:49:47.840 --> 0:49:50.320 she's rebelling against her friend that just wants to talk to, 0:49:50.600 --> 0:49:54.080 wants to Oh my gosh. So yeah. 0:49:54.160 --> 0:49:55.919 One of the things is adults. One of the pet 0:49:55.920 --> 0:49:58.040 peeves adults acting like petty teens. 0:49:58.160 --> 0:50:00.960 Yes, and that would be Robin Dixon. But she's good. 0:50:01.040 --> 0:50:03.319 I'm so happy that we had this episode today because 0:50:03.320 --> 0:50:05.680 we've been able to pick apart. While Robin needs to. 0:50:05.640 --> 0:50:08.200 Do better, what about you? 0:50:08.400 --> 0:50:09.399 I need to do better too. 0:50:10.360 --> 0:50:12.759 I don't get deep, I don't, I just I just 0:50:12.800 --> 0:50:14.040 want to know what the weather is. 0:50:14.160 --> 0:50:16.640 Your list is a little longer than mine, Okay. 0:50:16.680 --> 0:50:20.200 I mean mine are like fixable. Okay. 0:50:20.440 --> 0:50:25.640 Anyway, I believe that is our episode for today. We 0:50:25.680 --> 0:50:30.520 are reasonably shady, and I think I think today you 0:50:30.640 --> 0:50:31.400 might be shady. 0:50:31.480 --> 0:50:33.799 Robin. I might be told a little bit too much, 0:50:33.840 --> 0:50:34.680 oh my friends. 0:50:35.280 --> 0:50:39.080 Yes, and I think Jiselle might be reasonable. Oh no, 0:50:40.000 --> 0:50:44.040 oh my gosh, probably right. But we so appreciate you 0:50:44.120 --> 0:50:46.840 all listening. I think that in our next episode. We 0:50:46.880 --> 0:50:48.480 don't know what our next episode is going to be, 0:50:48.680 --> 0:50:51.000 but I do believe we might have a guest. Yes, 0:50:51.400 --> 0:50:53.840 so you guys have to stay tuned. Thank you so 0:50:53.920 --> 0:50:56.040 much for listening to us. This is Reasonably Shady. I 0:50:56.080 --> 0:51:00.560 am Jaselle Bryant and I Am Robin Dixon D. Hey, 0:51:00.600 --> 0:51:09.320 We're out. We love y'all. Reasonably Shady is a production 0:51:09.520 --> 0:51:12.000 of the Black Effect podcast Network. 0:51:12.200 --> 0:51:17.160 For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 0:51:17.280 --> 0:51:19.240 or wherever you listen to your favorite shows 0:51:19.560 --> 0:51:22.520 And you can connect with us on social media at 0:51:22.719 --> 0:51:30.160 Robin Dixon ten, Giselle Bryant, and Reasonably Shady.