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Speaker 1: Hello, my loves, welcome back and give them all a podcast.

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Speaker 1: I am.

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Speaker 2: It's early, it's early. It's early for me, it's nine

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Speaker 2: to twenty five am.

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Speaker 1: That for me to start podcasting and using my brain

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Speaker 1: is definitely like I'm a ten o'clocker. Yeah, because you

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Speaker 1: sit and go, okay, we're gonna start the podcast at

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Speaker 1: nine thirty. Well, then I got to wake up and

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Speaker 1: get ocean ready and do that whole shtick. Yeah, my

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Speaker 1: mom took her this morning. I didn't take her. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I do this well. Good.

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Speaker 2: I saw a lot of activity again once again. You

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Speaker 2: were out and about this weekend.

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Speaker 1: I went to Palm Springs.

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Speaker 2: Tell me about it.

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Speaker 1: Well, it was much needed. Life is weird. Everyone's life

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Speaker 1: gets weird at some point, right, So when you just

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Speaker 1: like LA for my friends who don't live here, my

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Speaker 1: people who don't live here, it can become suffocating, you know, Jess. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's little things that happen where you're like, I've got

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Speaker 1: to get the fuck out of here.

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Speaker 2: People in New York City know this feeling very well too,

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Speaker 2: do they? Yes?

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Speaker 1: Okay, well, my.

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Speaker 2: Friends in New York are constantly talking about it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that is where I'm at you know when you say,

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Speaker 1: like I want to crawl out of my own skin.

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Speaker 1: I want to crawl out of Los Angeles. Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's just what I want right now. Yeah, So Shina said,

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Speaker 1: let's go to Palm Springs. I had you cancel most

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Speaker 1: of Thursday all of Friday so that I could go

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Speaker 1: and get my mind right. It was a very funky

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Speaker 1: couple of days, Like Thursday was a little fucking weird,

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Speaker 1: Friday was super fun. Saturday ocean came down with the cold.

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Speaker 1: I asked Shena, do you prefer that we leave so

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Speaker 1: we don't get summer moonsick? She was like, I think

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Speaker 1: that ship has sailed already. They've literally been kissing, sharing cups.

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Speaker 1: So it was it was great. It was easy. We

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Speaker 1: stayed in most of the time because it was raining.

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Speaker 2: But why do you think did something happen where you

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Speaker 2: felt like I have to get out of here? Do

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Speaker 2: you just think it just happens sometimes when you live

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Speaker 2: in a city like LA.

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Speaker 1: I think it just happens sometimes when you live in

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Speaker 1: a place like La. But also just everything going on

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Speaker 1: in my personal life, which I'm like sitting here like

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Speaker 1: wanting a fucking just share like I want to get

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Speaker 1: on this mic and be like, this is what I've

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Speaker 1: been fucking dealing with for fourteen fucking months. These are

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Speaker 1: the little things that I gotta fucking deal with, and

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Speaker 1: I'm sick of it. And to watch someone constantly try

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Speaker 1: to say that everyone around is lying, but he's the

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Speaker 1: keeper of the truth. Everyone else is insane and lying

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Speaker 1: trying to take him down, It's like beyond comprehension from an.

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Speaker 2: Out just an outsider, even if I didn't know you,

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Speaker 2: an outsider looking in you have been saying for a

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Speaker 2: long time, like, hey, there's stuff going on no one

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Speaker 2: knows about. I'm just trying to get through stuff going on,

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Speaker 2: stuff going on. And slowly we have started to be

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Speaker 2: we as the audience have become exposed to some of

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Speaker 2: the things, maybe just the surface.

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Speaker 1: Well, what if I always suggests from the very beginning,

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Speaker 1: what is done in the dark will always come to

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Speaker 1: the light, right and now people are somewhat somewhat seeing

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Speaker 1: why I am fighting for my child right now. Right,

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Speaker 1: So it's a day in, day out type of thing.

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Speaker 1: And I still believe what is done in the dark

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Speaker 1: will always come to the light, The truth will always

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Speaker 1: find the light. That's just how shit works. So I'm

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Speaker 1: doing whatever I can to prevent things from happening, to protect,

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Speaker 1: you know, my offspring, my little cub. But it's a lot.

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Speaker 1: And I will say this weekend I had moments of

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Speaker 1: just we talked about this week last week, where I

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Speaker 1: have moments of like, Okay, this is a moment where

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Speaker 1: I may break, And I got to sit in a

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Speaker 1: room and like regroup right and tell myself, this motherfucker

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Speaker 1: is not gonna break me, bitch, I'll be damned.

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Speaker 2: And it's incredible to watch, only because you know, you're

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Speaker 2: starting to hear and see people going, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: this is what Lala's been hinting at and talking about

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Speaker 2: and and and you know me, I'm like, oh my,

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Speaker 2: And people are like, no, wonder she's been fighting and

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Speaker 2: this and that. I'm like, oh god, you don't even no, no, no,

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Speaker 2: this is not it. This is not even we haven't

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Speaker 2: even scratched the surface. So you are going through so

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Speaker 2: much more than people know. And you don't, like, you're

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Speaker 2: not the kind of person to sit there and say that,

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Speaker 2: like if you guys only knew, like you're just not

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Speaker 2: and to watch you are going through so much and

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Speaker 2: I literally have said this honestly these past two years.

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Speaker 2: To watch you get up every day and you have

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Speaker 2: your moments, but then to soldier on is like extremely inspiring.

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Speaker 2: And we always get dms that are like, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: like Laala inspires me. She's killing it, which so true.

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Speaker 2: But I think just one day, I think people may

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Speaker 2: know the full story and it's it's incredible.

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Speaker 1: Full story will come out. Yeah yeah, and I don't

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Speaker 1: even have to be the one to say it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're you're you're killing it. You're an amazing mother,

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Speaker 2: You're an amazing just woman friend boss. So it's like amazing.

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Speaker 2: It's just like bravo to you, you know.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Jess. Yeah. In brighter news, Yes, let's hear

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Speaker 1: you had a really fun I love watching your Instagram

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Speaker 1: so much. It brings me so much joy. Okay, let's

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Speaker 1: talk about you micro needled your own.

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Speaker 2: Face, micro needled my own face, which I didn't even know.

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Speaker 2: I got a micro needling tool, which I'll link you guys.

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Speaker 2: I got all of these. You know, it's funny. I

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Speaker 2: got all of the stuff. Micro needling tool, led light mask.

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Speaker 2: When the pandemic hit in twenty twenty because I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to be home time to do all of

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Speaker 2: like the facial stuff and everything. And I probably used

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Speaker 2: them all like twice and then forgot about them until

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Speaker 2: this past weekend. I was looking in the mirror, and

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Speaker 2: you know, I'm thirty one, and I've always you know,

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Speaker 2: I look at my skin and I see the wrinkles forming,

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Speaker 2: and I've I've said it on here before. I always

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Speaker 2: go back and forth with like is it time for botox?

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Speaker 2: Is it time? So I think it is, but haven't

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Speaker 2: gotten it yet. But this past weekend I did some

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Speaker 2: micro needling, did an led light mask. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if it's going to help, because I've heard and read

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Speaker 2: and watched that you have to be consistent, but it

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Speaker 2: was just a fun little like.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. It looked the red light mask, which,

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Speaker 1: by the way, every time I go to a spaw

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Speaker 1: and have that treatment done, I fall asleep out cold.

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Speaker 1: The micro needling, I don't know if that's going to

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Speaker 1: help with wrinkle wrinkles. I know it helps with like

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Speaker 1: fine lines, but you know, just like the way we

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Speaker 1: move our faces, I don't know that it's going to

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Speaker 1: like really get it in there.

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Speaker 2: What does it do oh collagen right it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, basically like resurfaces your your healthy skin. Okay, well,

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Speaker 1: and that's why I do the micro needling with the

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Speaker 1: PRP where they put basically your own blood, not really,

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Speaker 1: they separate the platelets and then they put the plasma

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Speaker 1: on and then they micro needle that into your face.

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Speaker 2: See that it is your own blood. I would pass out,

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Speaker 2: but I would. Do you remember that?

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Speaker 1: Do you remember that video the blood blood what? Oh?

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Speaker 2: That was like one of the first YouTube viral throw

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Speaker 2: back same around the same time as the Charlie but

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Speaker 2: my Finger Charlie Charlie out and it's still hurting throw

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Speaker 2: I wonder if some people listening to this they're like,

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Speaker 2: what are they talking about?

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Speaker 1: As No, my demographic is, like I think mostly my

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Speaker 1: age and older. Okay, I definitely know what we're talking.

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Speaker 2: But because when I was talking about broad City, when

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Speaker 2: we were talking about pegging, and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 2: there's an episode on broad City, I got so many

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Speaker 2: dms like shout out hell, yes, broad City.

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Speaker 1: Can I tell you something really funny? And I hope

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Speaker 1: they keep it in this season and Bravo, please don't

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Speaker 1: email me. I don't want to live it ain't the day.

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Speaker 1: Just let me say this. We we're filming and we're

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Speaker 1: in like, we're in fight mode a group of us,

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Speaker 1: and I said, I pegged you from the beginning, and

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Speaker 1: the whole group likes to me, goes what And I

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Speaker 1: was like, like, I I called your like I knew

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Speaker 1: your card before your cars, before they were dealt. And

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Speaker 1: they were like, pegging is putting something in your asshole.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, are you serious pegging?

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Speaker 2: Yes, more specifically no, but that is Kyle says it.

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Speaker 2: He's like, well, I pegged him for a blah blah

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Speaker 2: blah guy. And I'm like, oh, did you.

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Speaker 1: Now that's what I thought.

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Speaker 2: Were you talking to a man or a woman?

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Speaker 1: Group of chicks? Oh, group of chicks.

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Speaker 2: That is so funny. I hope they keep that in.

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Speaker 1: I do too. There's my tea on vander Pump that

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Speaker 1: there are times that are like really, really fucking funny,

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Speaker 1: and I hope that some of them they keep in.

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Speaker 2: You know what I loved last season. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if this is the first season they did it, but

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Speaker 2: it seemed like they kept those moments in. It was

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Speaker 2: like the week after the episode aired, they had the

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Speaker 2: I don't know if it was extended version of totally,

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Speaker 2: well that extended.

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Speaker 1: When they do that, it's like an like unseen unseen.

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Speaker 2: Footage totally they have in the episodes. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if they'll do it this season, but that seems to

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Speaker 2: be when they put the funny stuff back in, like

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Speaker 2: what you didn't see from the scene, and it's like

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Speaker 2: a silly moment.

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Speaker 1: Yes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, But speaking of vander Pump, I'm curious because I

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Speaker 2: saw a lot of news and stuff. I saw a

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Speaker 2: lot of like tea spilled this past weekend on Bravo

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Speaker 2: account and people questioning certain relationships you have in friendships.

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Speaker 2: Do you have anything to say on that?

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Speaker 1: So I did because today we don't have a guest,

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Speaker 1: and I like when we have a guest, but I

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Speaker 1: also have so much fun, just like shooting the shit

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Speaker 1: with you guys, you know. So I asked my friends

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Speaker 1: on Instagram we're recording a podcast, like what do you

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Speaker 1: want to know? And so many people asked about this

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Speaker 1: what you're referring to, So of course I was like,

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Speaker 1: why are people asking this? Well, now I know that

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Speaker 1: someone asked Katie this on her podcast and she said,

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Speaker 1: quote unquote, the vibes are definitely off. So I guess

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Speaker 1: the vibes are definitely off.

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Speaker 2: Is that news to you?

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Speaker 1: Well? After the DMS I got from her the other day,

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Speaker 1: not so much. Not so much, I would say a

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Speaker 1: little bit off. But just like I've said before, I

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Speaker 1: got a lot going on. That is the least of

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Speaker 1: my concern. And I hope she had a very happy birthday.

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Speaker 1: It slipped my mind that it was her birthday because

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Speaker 1: it was MLK Day.

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Speaker 2: Oh oh, her birthday was yesterday.

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Speaker 1: Monday, on Monday. Yeah, oh, I didn't know that. Okay, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so I completely spaced it, you know, with MLK Day happening,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I had ocean she was feeling sick.

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Speaker 1: So there's that. Okay.

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Speaker 2: Well, as someone who is a fan of your friendship,

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Speaker 2: I hope that the vibes get back on. But I

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Speaker 2: guess we'll see.

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Speaker 1: We'll see, We'll see, yeah, you know, m hm, you know,

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Speaker 1: we'll fucking see. There was another funny question that someone

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Speaker 1: asked me on the gram. Did you ever sleep with Jack?

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Speaker 2: For real?

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Speaker 1: Answer?

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Speaker 2: Tell the truth, Laala, No, I did not. I do

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Speaker 2: not have even slept with him.

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Speaker 1: I think season four, like before Brittany had come into

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Speaker 1: vander Pump Rules. There was like flirting going on.

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Speaker 2: I remember that, yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: But nothing ever happened, like not even not even a kiss,

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Speaker 1: Like nothing at all, Yeah happened. Ever.

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Speaker 2: That's so funny because you I remember that scene where

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Speaker 2: it was like, oh, she's flirting on whatever, And it

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Speaker 2: makes me laugh because I just feel like I've only

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Speaker 2: met Jackson a couple of times. You know, nice guy,

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Speaker 2: but I feel like you two are so different, and

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Speaker 2: I would be shook if I ever found out you

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Speaker 2: guys slept together.

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Speaker 1: I means, yeah, but weren't you shook when you found

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Speaker 1: out that, like I hooked double jeens. Yeah, Alcohol's one

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Speaker 1: hell of a drug, it really is. In fact, there

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Speaker 1: was a scene season four at the very beginning where

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Speaker 1: I went to have drinks with Jack's Sheena and Kristen,

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Speaker 1: and I had my hand on Jackson's leg and everyone

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Speaker 1: was like, she's doing something naughty and I wasn't. And

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Speaker 1: then I had my like the person I was so

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Speaker 1: in love with at the time pick me up from

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Speaker 1: that bar. I was wasted. I do not recommend this.

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Speaker 1: It was very fun, but I don't recommend it. I

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Speaker 1: literally was having sex with him while he was driving

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Speaker 1: like on his lap. Okay, like one wrong move, we

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Speaker 1: were through the windshield. What's this someone that we saw

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Speaker 1: on the show or no, no, okay, it wasn't someone

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Speaker 1: you saw on the show, but it was talked about.

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Speaker 1: We get to my apartment at the time, the famous

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Speaker 1: or the infamous apartment on Olympic Okay, and that's when

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Speaker 1: I ate someone's bum bum for the first time ever.

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Speaker 1: And it was this up on the show. I was like,

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Speaker 1: are you kidding me?

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Speaker 2: Wait, hold on, hold on, I'm I want to make

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Speaker 2: sure I'm understanding this correctly. You had sex with this

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Speaker 2: guy in the car who picked you up. Yes, Then

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Speaker 2: when you got home.

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Speaker 1: Who I had been seeing since I was like twenty

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Speaker 1: one and I was twenty.

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Speaker 2: Four, did you eat his ass? And James's no, jamesus,

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Speaker 2: I don't.

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Speaker 1: Man's the boys.

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Speaker 2: The guy And then you told James about.

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Speaker 1: It, and then I was like, oh my gosh, like

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Speaker 1: do I think we're getting back together? This is awesome? Yes?

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Speaker 1: What And guess what what we did get back together?

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Speaker 1: You did?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: And then I kept having dreams that he was cheating

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Speaker 1: on me, and I was like, this is called a

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Speaker 1: gut feeling. So I broke up with him again betrayal.

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Speaker 2: It took me a couple of years to stop taking

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Speaker 2: out my dreams on Kyle be like, are you fucking?

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Speaker 2: I would wake up and be like wake up.

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Speaker 1: He'd be like, the fuck is.

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Speaker 2: Wrong with you? Hear me out, Yeah, this is what

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Speaker 2: you did to me my dream because I was also crazy,

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Speaker 2: like the first two years I did him extremely insecure,

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Speaker 2: a drunk, drinking every night like.

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Speaker 1: Comic so don't picture you this way, Oh my.

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Speaker 2: God, messy going out. He was a DJ in Nashville,

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Speaker 2: so like he would DJ from nine to two and

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Speaker 2: I would get free drinks right at like the rooftop clubs,

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Speaker 2: and I would just drunk, messy, yucky, but more better now.

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Speaker 1: You know, she feel like that happened.

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Speaker 2: You know what's interesting too, I feel like if it

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Speaker 2: weren't him, any other guy would have probably not stuck

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Speaker 2: around like I think any.

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Speaker 1: Other guy would have been like patient.

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Speaker 2: Yeah he was patient. So if any men are out

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Speaker 2: there listening to this and you have a gut feeling

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Speaker 2: like this is my lady, but she's acting a fool

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Speaker 2: right now, maybe hang in there, have some talks with her.

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Speaker 2: It might be just her thing, her insecurities, you know.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but also consider her age.

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Speaker 2: Consider her age. I was twenty five, Yeah I was.

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Speaker 2: I think I feel like anything.

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Speaker 1: If she's in her early to mid twenties, Yeah, she

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Speaker 1: can be acting crazy once she starts stepping into like

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Speaker 1: the twenty seven twenty eight zone, she should really be

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Speaker 1: like kind of figuring it out. Still maybe a little

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Speaker 1: up and down, but you know we're getting a grip. Yes,

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Speaker 1: once they hit thirty, yes I should mellow out. I

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Speaker 1: don't know who the fuck am I to judge.

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Speaker 2: And also, yes, I know a lot of my friends

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Speaker 2: who didn't drink until they were like twenty five, and

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Speaker 2: then they get to be thirty and that's their wild days.

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Speaker 2: So who knows. But can we go back to you

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Speaker 2: eating ass really quick?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Always did you enjoy it?

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Speaker 2: Number one? Because I've never done it. I never will.

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Speaker 2: That is a garbage area to me.

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Speaker 1: I am like, again, I was drinking.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I would assume it's like smelly and gross and terrible.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't smelly and gross and terrible. But I literally

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Speaker 1: like I would have let this man do anything to me,

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Speaker 1: like I was like in love.

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Speaker 2: Do you still talk to this No?

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Speaker 1: Okay, No, no, No, he's like married with children, Okay,

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Speaker 1: fine as fuck. His wife's fine as fuck. Okay, taking

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Speaker 1: hot kids, love that, you know. Okay.

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Speaker 2: So it was nice. It was a good experience.

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Speaker 1: That's good. It was a great experience. It was sad

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Speaker 1: because by the time we were both like, I had

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Speaker 1: moved out here, he was ready to commit, which is

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Speaker 1: what I had been wanting since I was like twenty

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Speaker 1: one and he was younger than me, and I met

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Speaker 1: him when he was in college and I chose that

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Speaker 1: thing to be with.

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Speaker 2: Oh it was around this time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like, you know what, You've really taken

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Speaker 1: my heart on a wild fucking ride, and I just

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Speaker 1: I could go for security and knowing that I'm going

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Speaker 1: to be taken care of in my emotional areas. Right,

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Speaker 1: He's present, and I just can't take the chance on

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Speaker 1: you doing to me what you've done for the past

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Speaker 1: however many years.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you wanted what you thought was stability, which makes

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Speaker 2: sense when you get to a mature age as a woman.

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Speaker 2: I think a lot of women search for that. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: Breg mistake, BG brigm shteak.

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Speaker 1: But then I would to have Ocean Kent exactly. The Angel,

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Speaker 1: The Angel Okay, this person is asking how to be

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Speaker 1: okay with being single. I've been single for four years

350
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Speaker 1: and still on struggle street. That's such a tough one

351
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Speaker 1: because I want to say, like, I feel like you

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Speaker 1: feel comfortable being single once you feel one hundred percent

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Speaker 1: with yourself. But I also have met many men, not

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Speaker 1: many women, but a lot of men who have been

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Speaker 1: single for a really long time who seem to be very,

356
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Speaker 1: very okay with themselves. They're one hundred percent on their own,

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Speaker 1: but they're like, I want a partner, like I'm ready.

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Speaker 1: The men, the men. I've met a lot of men

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Speaker 1: who are looking for that. Yeah, no, I agree with you.

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Speaker 2: I think that, Like I said, I met I had

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Speaker 2: I've told you this before, Lalla, and I think I've

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Speaker 2: said it on here. I met Kyle literally two days after.

363
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Speaker 2: I was like my entire family, like, here's my plan.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna be single forever when I'm thirty five, I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna get a sperm donor. I had my entire life plan,

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Speaker 2: and I was like excited for it. I'm like, I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna be the baddest bitch. And then I met Kyle

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Speaker 2: and I'm still that bitch, but like it was one

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Speaker 2: of those things where I was like finally happy and

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Speaker 2: secure with myself. I mean ended up being insecure for

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Speaker 2: a couple more years after that. But I think you're right.

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Speaker 2: I think that being happy with yourself and a lot

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Speaker 2: of people say this, but it comes when you're not looking.

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Speaker 2: Do you agree with that?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I think when you start like you're on the

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Speaker 1: move searching to find a dude, it's like they're nowhere

377
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Speaker 1: to be found. It's same with when you're in a

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Speaker 1: relationship and for some reason you got all these options

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Speaker 1: and you can't even do anything about it because you're like,

380
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:47,720
Speaker 1: I found my person, but so why do you want me?

381
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 1: And then you break up with them and you're like

382
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Speaker 1: where the dude is at?

383
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:54,480
Speaker 2: Because it's an energy, people have said, yeah, it's like

384
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:59,160
Speaker 2: an energy when you're happy and fulfilled with yourself, and yeah,

385
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 2: give or take a man or a woman, that's sort

386
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Speaker 2: of an attractive energy to a lot of people.

387
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Speaker 1: It's interesting. So I wouldn't even know how to answer

388
00:20:07,600 --> 00:20:10,480
Speaker 1: that because I've been single now for over a year,

389
00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:13,960
Speaker 1: and granted my situation is different, and we won't harp

390
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,360
Speaker 1: on my situation because we've been doing it for an eternity,

391
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:21,159
Speaker 1: it feels like. But I just think, as corny as

392
00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 1: it sounds, timing is everything.

393
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:30,480
Speaker 2: Timing is everything for everything. I feel like for everything, jobs, work, relationships,

394
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:31,760
Speaker 2: so many things are timing.

395
00:20:31,960 --> 00:20:34,600
Speaker 1: I also think you have to like really sit down

396
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:38,919
Speaker 1: and create an incredible bond with the universe. Is that

397
00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:42,040
Speaker 1: so weird? You guys can all think that I'm a

398
00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:45,719
Speaker 1: nut job, But I just find that when you have

399
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:52,159
Speaker 1: a profound relationship with the universe, it just works in

400
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:53,959
Speaker 1: your favor. And it could be just a mental thing

401
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,520
Speaker 1: where you're like, oh, it is making sense, you know,

402
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:59,040
Speaker 1: like almost like a placebo effect for the mind.

403
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:03,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's it is placebo effect, like thinking, Okay,

404
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:05,879
Speaker 2: I'm doing this, so things are gonna get better, and

405
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:08,800
Speaker 2: then things do get better. Right, No, I one hundred

406
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:12,160
Speaker 2: percent agree. It's the whole manifesting, which people, by the way,

407
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,359
Speaker 2: were like, I'm getting into it this year, tons of

408
00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:17,320
Speaker 2: people manifesting and doing gonna try your holy work.

409
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:22,320
Speaker 1: I just fucking do it. I'm not even fucking around

410
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:25,159
Speaker 1: with you right now. What are the Okay, let's just

411
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 1: put it in perspective for the one thing that okay,

412
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:30,120
Speaker 1: I've been manifesting from the time I was a child, right,

413
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:32,159
Speaker 1: I've always said I'm gonna grow up and be an

414
00:21:32,280 --> 00:21:35,280
Speaker 1: entertainment dam There was no one who could tell me otherwise.

415
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 1: There's a small percent chance la la great, I'm gonna

416
00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:43,960
Speaker 1: be a part of that. Yeah, I always told myself.

417
00:21:44,359 --> 00:21:48,320
Speaker 1: I was like, one day, I'm dreaming big. I want

418
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,360
Speaker 1: I want to be in a range Rover.

419
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:52,000
Speaker 2: You're in the nicest one I've seen.

420
00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:57,040
Speaker 1: You. Just keep manifesting. I feel like I'm going insane today.

421
00:21:57,080 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 1: So if anyone's sitting here being like, what's going on

422
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:03,720
Speaker 1: with her? Mentally, just no role with me today. I

423
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,920
Speaker 1: need y'all on my train. Please.

424
00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:10,800
Speaker 2: I'm eating this up. No, this is like you the manifesting.

425
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 2: I read something this weekend. It was like ten life tips.

426
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:17,000
Speaker 2: It was a TikTok or something, but number one was

427
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:19,720
Speaker 2: and take this as you will because some of us

428
00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 2: just need work. We need to make money, but never

429
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:25,399
Speaker 2: work for someone who you don't want to become. And

430
00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:28,600
Speaker 2: I was like, I've got that down because I look

431
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:32,200
Speaker 2: at you and I'm like, yes, that's goals, And I'm

432
00:22:32,200 --> 00:22:33,280
Speaker 2: like that's a great tip.

433
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,560
Speaker 1: And you know this isn't our forever, right, Jess. But

434
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,360
Speaker 1: there's gonna be a day where you come to work

435
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:41,160
Speaker 1: and we're free, like we've broken the chains.

436
00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 2: I love that you say that because I feel free.

437
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:45,560
Speaker 2: But I get what you're saying, Like best job I've

438
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 2: ever had, just because like it's you. I mean, I've

439
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,160
Speaker 2: said it over and over. But I love what we're doing.

440
00:22:51,359 --> 00:22:53,680
Speaker 2: We're making moves, we're taking meetings, we got things going

441
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 2: on behind the scenes, we've got schedules filled up. I

442
00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:57,160
Speaker 2: love it.

443
00:22:57,520 --> 00:22:58,160
Speaker 1: I love it too.

444
00:22:58,280 --> 00:23:02,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, but manifesting back to pie, I sat here and

445
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,600
Speaker 2: I found out a shit ton of things.

446
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:07,159
Speaker 1: I didn't have to do shit. I knew why I

447
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 1: was fighting and what I was in two weeks ago. Bam, Wow,

448
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,640
Speaker 1: I didn't have to say one thing. And here it is.

449
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:21,640
Speaker 1: Everyone knows now without me saying a word, without me confirming, denying,

450
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:24,159
Speaker 1: just sitting back and doing what I need to do

451
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:27,719
Speaker 1: behind the scenes. It's right in front of everyone. Oh oh,

452
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:30,320
Speaker 1: let's put the pieces of the puzzle together on why

453
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:33,720
Speaker 1: Lalla's been fighting for over a year now. All right,

454
00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:37,159
Speaker 1: So you sit your ass down and you call whatever

455
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,159
Speaker 1: it is you want into your life, and you know

456
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:42,520
Speaker 1: the universe has your back, and you say anything that

457
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:46,680
Speaker 1: is true, bring it to the light. And by the way,

458
00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:50,439
Speaker 1: sometimes I live like straight live right now, living on

459
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:54,000
Speaker 1: a prayer. Yeah, the only thing that keeps me going

460
00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 1: on a day to day where I can get out

461
00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:57,840
Speaker 1: of bed and function, even though I might go to

462
00:23:57,880 --> 00:23:59,960
Speaker 1: sleep and night and be like, wow, we did a lot,

463
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:04,400
Speaker 1: but I don't remember much because I'm so just occupied

464
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:08,879
Speaker 1: by what is my life. But you wake up in

465
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 1: the morning and you're straight living on trust in something

466
00:24:14,240 --> 00:24:14,840
Speaker 1: greater than you.

467
00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:17,679
Speaker 2: Well, what you just said about getting I wake up

468
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 2: in the morning and the only thing that gets me

469
00:24:19,119 --> 00:24:22,679
Speaker 2: out of bed. I read this this past weekend. A

470
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,679
Speaker 2: lot of us grew up hearing like choices have consequences,

471
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,720
Speaker 2: and we just sort of associate that with negativity. Like

472
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:30,960
Speaker 2: I always thought, like my parents told me that forever

473
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 2: and to me it always meant like if I make

474
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,200
Speaker 2: a bad choice, I'm gonna pay for it somehow, which

475
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:39,320
Speaker 2: I totally agree. But I was reading something it was

476
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 2: called like Unholy and Holy Choices this week and my

477
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,639
Speaker 2: Grandma's a doll she sent me a book, but it

478
00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:48,960
Speaker 2: was saying choices have consequences. Think of that as well

479
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:52,200
Speaker 2: as like the not negative thing. So if you make

480
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:55,480
Speaker 2: a good choice, there's gonna be a good consequence. So

481
00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:57,960
Speaker 2: just you getting out of your laying in bed and

482
00:24:58,000 --> 00:25:00,680
Speaker 2: you're like, I'm gonna choose to get out of bed

483
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:03,320
Speaker 2: this morning and you get up, there's going to be

484
00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 2: a positive consequence for that choice. Just a choice as

485
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 2: simple as I'm going to get out of bed, next thing,

486
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:14,440
Speaker 2: I'm going to journal, there's going to be a positive

487
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 2: consequence that comes from that. And I like it kind

488
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:19,840
Speaker 2: of changed my mindset because I'm like, oh, true, if

489
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,119
Speaker 2: even the smallest choices are going to have consequences, and

490
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:25,399
Speaker 2: it goes the other way too. You choose a tiny

491
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 2: choice to make a bad decision, that's gonna have a

492
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 2: consequence that you're gonna have to live with. So it's

493
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 2: kind of like it kind of has just like formed

494
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:36,320
Speaker 2: my mindset a little, Like harder things. I'm choosing to

495
00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:38,879
Speaker 2: go to the gym for twenty minutes, that's gonna have

496
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:42,920
Speaker 2: a positive consequence for me on my mental stability. So

497
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:45,280
Speaker 2: I just like you just saying something as simple as

498
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,159
Speaker 2: I'm choosing to get out of bed this morning is

499
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:51,760
Speaker 2: going to just have a positive consequence, right, Yeah.

500
00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 1: And I remember like at the very beginning of all

501
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,960
Speaker 1: of this. There was a lawyer who said to me,

502
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,240
Speaker 1: I need you to keep your head where your feet are.

503
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 1: And so many times I've noticed when I'm like laying

504
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 1: in bed, because that's really like at night when my

505
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:11,360
Speaker 1: anxiety kicks in, and in the morning, when I see

506
00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 1: the sun come up, I'm like, oh fuck, we got it.

507
00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:15,520
Speaker 1: Like I got to start the day and it starts

508
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 1: all over again, and what am I gonna have to

509
00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:22,120
Speaker 1: deal with today? But when I and I realized the disconnect,

510
00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:26,760
Speaker 1: my head is like up in the clouds going a

511
00:26:26,840 --> 00:26:30,200
Speaker 1: million miles an hour, and I have to, like, literally

512
00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:33,760
Speaker 1: it feels literally put my head back onto my body

513
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:36,200
Speaker 1: where my feet are. And I immediately when I can

514
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:41,840
Speaker 1: connect my head to my feet, calmness. Yeah, right now

515
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,760
Speaker 1: we're laying in the bed. You ain't got to think

516
00:26:43,760 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 1: about shit right now, we're podcasting. Just think about that. Yeah. Yeah,

517
00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:49,479
Speaker 1: And that's a lot.

518
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:51,560
Speaker 2: And yeah. And that's the thing we talked about last

519
00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 2: week too, is like why worry about something that hasn't

520
00:26:54,600 --> 00:26:56,919
Speaker 2: happened yet. If it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen, and

521
00:26:56,960 --> 00:26:59,760
Speaker 2: you're gonna have to feel the negative emotions when it happens,

522
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,040
Speaker 2: but you worrying about it is like you're gonna have

523
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:04,719
Speaker 2: to feel those negative emotions twice.

524
00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:07,919
Speaker 1: You know, Well, this is my teachable moment. And I

525
00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:11,440
Speaker 1: think all of us go through this where we every

526
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:15,840
Speaker 1: experience in life is teaching us something. And I've never

527
00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:20,520
Speaker 1: believed in your strength is being tested. I feel I

528
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 1: feel like your strength is being shown rather than tested.

529
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:28,120
Speaker 1: But these are teachable moments, and for me, I have

530
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:31,760
Speaker 1: to remember I don't need to cross bridges that we're

531
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 1: not at yet. Yeah, I'm thinking about bridges that I

532
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:36,880
Speaker 1: may never even have to cross at all.

533
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:42,520
Speaker 2: And you're feeling the feelings probably of oh shit in yeah,

534
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 2: if you're feeling the feelings of what you would feel

535
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:48,080
Speaker 2: approaching those bridges when you may never approach them, So

536
00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 2: why put yourself through that?

537
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 1: Yeah? But I think that most people relate to that.

538
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:57,200
Speaker 1: We all live on a what if we got to

539
00:27:57,240 --> 00:28:00,359
Speaker 1: stop living on a what if? I'm all about it, B,

540
00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:04,399
Speaker 1: but let's not. Let's take the plan B, put it

541
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 1: in a box and visit it when it needs to

542
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: be visited.

543
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: Right, it's there if it needs to be right. Yeah, Wow,

544
00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 2: I love I love these episodes.

545
00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:17,439
Speaker 1: Here we go. We go from eating nast to manifestation

546
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:27,360
Speaker 1: bitch drinks you go to now being sober? Perier, where

547
00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:31,760
Speaker 1: are you at? I'm gonna need you to be like, hey, Lalla,

548
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:36,640
Speaker 1: we would love to sponsor you. I mean, I literally

549
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,520
Speaker 1: how many dress how many bitches filled to the brim?

550
00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 1: I have Perier's coming out of my ears and they're

551
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:48,040
Speaker 1: wiped out as quickly as they're put in the fridge.

552
00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 2: Some might say too many, We are all. We always

553
00:28:50,360 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 2: have them stocked at the office. We've got to have

554
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:57,160
Speaker 2: them stocked at Lala's house. Perier, the amount of ideas

555
00:28:57,240 --> 00:29:02,920
Speaker 2: Lalla has to just creatively push your brand. If you

556
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 2: sponsor her or this podcast, it's gonna when you finally

557
00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 2: we're manifesting that. And when you finally sponsor Lalla, we're

558
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,560
Speaker 2: gonna have a little Perier celebration.

559
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 1: That's my go to drink. Yeah, and it makes me

560
00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:19,640
Speaker 1: happy when I say to a waiter, do you have

561
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:24,800
Speaker 1: sparkling water, preferably Perier, and they say we do it.

562
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:28,640
Speaker 1: Like the joy that it brings me, Yeah, it makes

563
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:35,680
Speaker 1: me sad. It's almost like like you being gone on

564
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 1: a long trip and you're finally home. That's what Perry

565
00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 1: makes me feel Oh, my God, makes me feel like

566
00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 1: I'm at home. I'm not kidding. I have a profound

567
00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:52,080
Speaker 1: love for it, you really do.

568
00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,240
Speaker 2: I want to love anything as much as you love Perier,

569
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 2: to be honest.

570
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,520
Speaker 1: So people ask me what's your drink of choice when

571
00:29:57,560 --> 00:30:02,080
Speaker 1: you go out of Perier? A Perier that's it, Perier

572
00:30:02,160 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 1: in a champagne glass, periy and a short glass perio

573
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:07,320
Speaker 1: camp Perier at the bottle. I don't care, or just

574
00:30:07,320 --> 00:30:09,920
Speaker 1: get it in my body.

575
00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:12,040
Speaker 2: That's true. And when you are looking for something a

576
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 2: little sweeter you you do? Do you still go with

577
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:15,040
Speaker 2: Starla or no?

578
00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 1: Oh, Starla's we want to get real. When I'm having

579
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:24,280
Speaker 1: a rough day, starless sparkling rose done a champagne glass

580
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 1: takes all my cares away.

581
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, and these are sponsored, my friends, These are just

582
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 2: her loves Placibo effect.

583
00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:31,800
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.

584
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:36,720
Speaker 2: You know how people have the like like diamond encrusted

585
00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:39,920
Speaker 2: like McDonald's bags, and I want to get you or

586
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 2: find a could you imagine a diamond encrusted like Perier purse?

587
00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 1: Okay, so there's a a designer named Judith Lieber. If

588
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:54,320
Speaker 1: you've ever seen like the Kardashians with their super sparkly,

589
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 1: like one hundred dollar bill purses that they take around.

590
00:30:57,520 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 1: Ye've seen cupcakes. So I have the hammer Okay, a

591
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 1: hamburger purse. Oh my. I bought it for myself because

592
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 1: I was so obsessed. She does it in like hot dogs.

593
00:31:10,080 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 2: Oh my god, these are amazing aliens.

594
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: So it's sold out, but I spent just shy of

595
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:20,000
Speaker 1: six thousand dollars on it. I'm looking right here, six

596
00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:21,040
Speaker 1: grand Okay.

597
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:23,320
Speaker 2: Is it like swar Off skik Yes, okay.

598
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:27,240
Speaker 1: You can't fit shit in it. It's literally all about looks.

599
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:30,680
Speaker 1: I've taken it out all of one time, and when

600
00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 1: I take it out, there's nothing in it except maybe

601
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:36,440
Speaker 1: a chapstick, okay, and then the rest of the stuff

602
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:38,719
Speaker 1: I give to my husband. I'm like, hold my wallet,

603
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,520
Speaker 1: here's my lipliner. Actually, if I have like a little

604
00:31:42,520 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: tiny nub of a lipliner, I can put that in

605
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,880
Speaker 1: it too, like if I've shaved it down to the

606
00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 1: point where it's just like a tiny little guy. So

607
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 1: it's an accessory, total accessory. It's just meant to be like,

608
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:57,960
Speaker 1: oh that's weird. Yeah, I'm oddly fucking awesome because it's

609
00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:01,840
Speaker 1: a hamber her purse. I mean, look at this shit, Jess.

610
00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 1: We got to post this on the ground, and I

611
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:05,240
Speaker 1: really expect how you look at that? Am I lying?

612
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:07,320
Speaker 1: Five six hundred and ninety five dollars?

613
00:32:07,520 --> 00:32:09,120
Speaker 2: Oh that's beautiful though.

614
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:10,800
Speaker 1: And I was like, I deserve this. I don't know

615
00:32:10,840 --> 00:32:12,959
Speaker 1: what belt I deserved it, but I bought it. Well

616
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:13,240
Speaker 1: you do.

617
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 2: And I wonder if she makes for they the brand

618
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:20,600
Speaker 2: Judith Lieber may would make an actual.

619
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. We should reach out. I mean, look,

620
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:25,960
Speaker 1: she has a croissant, she has a Wilbur, the pig Wilbur.

621
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 2: Oh my god, these are there?

622
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:31,560
Speaker 1: I mean yeah, a hot dog, the hot dog sold out, a.

623
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:34,000
Speaker 2: Rainbow basketball French fries?

624
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 1: Are you kidding? I know how much is that one? Same? Same?

625
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:37,920
Speaker 2: Six thousand?

626
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 1: Well?

627
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:38,720
Speaker 2: Five six nine?

628
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 1: All right, let's reach out to her. Let's see if

629
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:44,240
Speaker 1: she can make me a perryer Perth. That'd be fucking awesome, right.

630
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 2: No, that'd be incredible. I've been thinking about it, and

631
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:48,040
Speaker 2: I'm like, but where would I get one made?

632
00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:51,480
Speaker 1: Judith Leber leb yours for six gees?

633
00:32:51,760 --> 00:32:52,280
Speaker 2: Oh?

634
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:56,880
Speaker 1: Easy? Good god? So there's that. Yes, I love Perry.

635
00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:59,960
Speaker 1: That's my go to when it comes to non alcoholic beverages,

636
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 1: I wish I had something more fun for you guys.

637
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,320
Speaker 1: There's also I used to love this at the very

638
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 1: beginning of sobriety, where it was like I need something

639
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: in a short glass. Have them do sparkling water and

640
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 1: then mostly pineapple juice, so like pineapple juice, splash of

641
00:33:18,240 --> 00:33:21,920
Speaker 1: the sparkling water, lime, and then if they can do

642
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:25,440
Speaker 1: it to heen rim. That's like a.

643
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 2: Skinny margarita vibe, isn't it. No, maybe not, but I mean,

644
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 2: I mean it sounds great. It sounds like.

645
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,880
Speaker 1: Take out the juice. I think of the skinny margarita

646
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:37,719
Speaker 1: is literally just tequila and like a lot of lime juice, right,

647
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,280
Speaker 1: and maybe a splash of sparkling water.

648
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:41,600
Speaker 2: I don't know there is because all the things you're

649
00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 2: saying seem like they wouldn't be a sugar overload either,

650
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 2: which I love. But if you are looking for a

651
00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:50,600
Speaker 2: sugar not a sugar overload, but like a simple syrup,

652
00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:55,280
Speaker 2: which is just sugar and water heated until the sugar dissolves.

653
00:33:55,320 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 2: A simple syrup with like grapefruit, ginger, beer, sparkling water,

654
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:07,800
Speaker 2: it's basically a mule like a moscow. Mule, but just

655
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:11,440
Speaker 2: take out the alcohol and that's really good too, Like

656
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,759
Speaker 2: Kyle and I. If I'm feeling like Cocktailey but don't

657
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:17,440
Speaker 2: want alcohol, I'll make like a sweet sugary drink like that.

658
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:22,040
Speaker 1: You know what. I like more like sour over sweet. Yeah.

659
00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 2: And you said you were never when you did drink.

660
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:26,800
Speaker 2: You were never a big sweet drink person, were you?

661
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:30,920
Speaker 2: You were just like vodka vodka soda, Yeah, with no fruit.

662
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:33,480
Speaker 1: I didn't want lime, lemon, nothing really.

663
00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:36,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, no margarita's ever, or did you?

664
00:34:36,440 --> 00:34:38,719
Speaker 1: When I went to a Mexican jokay, I would get

665
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:42,000
Speaker 1: a margarita, but it wasn't like that was my go

666
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:44,600
Speaker 1: doo too, and I would usually only have one of

667
00:34:44,640 --> 00:34:47,320
Speaker 1: a fun drink. And then it was like all vodka sodas.

668
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:54,320
Speaker 1: Smart love mes vodka sodas. I love the best. Yeah.

669
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 1: Like when I watch someone order a drink and it's

670
00:34:57,120 --> 00:35:00,879
Speaker 1: a vodka soda, I'm like, the first sip you're about

671
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:02,000
Speaker 1: to have, Oh lifetime ever?

672
00:35:02,239 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 2: Really? I hate vodka.

673
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:05,560
Speaker 1: What do you like? Tequila? Yeah?

674
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 2: But even tequila, it's been like giving me rash, just

675
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 2: like I just don't really drink, you know that, Kaya,

676
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:11,279
Speaker 2: I don't either yeah, or.

677
00:35:11,239 --> 00:35:15,279
Speaker 1: Like Rose, Okay, that's nice. There was another funny part

678
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: season four where Brittany I think we're in Hawaii. We

679
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 1: are in Hawaii, and I'm like wanting to bond with

680
00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:22,600
Speaker 1: the group. I had my little black thonged bikini on

681
00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:24,799
Speaker 1: because everyone was like she went took her top off

682
00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:26,439
Speaker 1: at the waterfall. So I was like, tomorrow, I'm gonna

683
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:29,239
Speaker 1: bring my ass out. Then you guys want to call

684
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:31,880
Speaker 1: me a ho, I'm gonna show you a ho bitch.

685
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:39,239
Speaker 1: And we're sitting on these floaties and Brittany wants to

686
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:42,479
Speaker 1: play a game called baseball bat and we're like, okay,

687
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:44,279
Speaker 1: what is in She was like, you literally passed the

688
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,440
Speaker 1: bottle and drink it, and I'm like, this is not

689
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:49,760
Speaker 1: a game, this is just us passing. I'm for drinking.

690
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:52,719
Speaker 1: I take a sip and I know it's tequila. I

691
00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:54,839
Speaker 1: hate tequila, but like, I want to fit in and

692
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:57,200
Speaker 1: I want this could be a Bonnie experience. We're on

693
00:35:57,280 --> 00:36:00,680
Speaker 1: this big floaty together. I take a sip, it's warm,

694
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,960
Speaker 1: and I vomit into the water. There's a vomit floating around.

695
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 2: Is this on the show.

696
00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 1: I don't know that it made the cut, but it

697
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:12,640
Speaker 1: was definitely on the show. I don't know that they

698
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,719
Speaker 1: showed me. I do know that they showed me bending over.

699
00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:17,719
Speaker 1: I was throwing up, But I think they were like, oh,

700
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,240
Speaker 1: this is a great time to show that Lalla's ass

701
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:22,680
Speaker 1: and vagina are hanging out. They had to blur it

702
00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:26,680
Speaker 1: because I had on a skippy bikini.

703
00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,800
Speaker 2: Wait, so you threw up. There's vomit floating. Do people

704
00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:33,320
Speaker 2: all like run out or is it not even that traumatic?

705
00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:36,759
Speaker 1: No? They were gross. Just like if I hated it's

706
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:39,279
Speaker 1: some dumb bitch who took her top off in front

707
00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:41,200
Speaker 1: of my dude and then had her ass out and

708
00:36:41,239 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 1: she threw up, I'd be like, bitch, you a rookie,

709
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:45,640
Speaker 1: get off this raft.

710
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 2: It's so funny to think about if you would. Do

711
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 2: you think you would get along with a U?

712
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:54,000
Speaker 1: No, because I've met bitches like me and I can't

713
00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:56,920
Speaker 1: stand him. Really Yeah, I'm like, oh, you're annoying, And

714
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, it's because you're looking in a mirror.

715
00:36:59,120 --> 00:37:02,719
Speaker 2: Basically, that is so interesting.

716
00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:04,560
Speaker 1: I do not connect with people who are like me,

717
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:09,200
Speaker 1: not one bit. Really, No, I think I think I'd

718
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:12,799
Speaker 1: be annoyed by me back then. Yeah, well, you know

719
00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:14,680
Speaker 1: what it is what it is. I was young, I

720
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 1: was like on a television show and I was like,

721
00:37:16,719 --> 00:37:17,560
Speaker 1: bring the dogs out.

722
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,280
Speaker 2: Well, they say that the things you hate most about

723
00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:23,600
Speaker 2: people is like your deepest insecurity. So I hate I

724
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:26,640
Speaker 2: really can't connect with people who come off as desperate

725
00:37:26,719 --> 00:37:30,520
Speaker 2: to me, and so deep down I must be like desperate.

726
00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:31,640
Speaker 1: I don't know, You're not.

727
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:35,600
Speaker 2: I'm not desperate, but like when I've had a lot

728
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:39,359
Speaker 2: of women in my life who like, I love them,

729
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:42,120
Speaker 2: but they're they're just there's some sort of desperation, whether

730
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,760
Speaker 2: or not it's for a man or for like a

731
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,239
Speaker 2: a job or for and it like triggers me for

732
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 2: some reason. And we've had I've had a lot of

733
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 2: arguments with women in my life about it, and desperation

734
00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:54,759
Speaker 2: triggers me. And like I've read so many times, what

735
00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,560
Speaker 2: triggers you and other people? You have some sort of

736
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:00,160
Speaker 2: thing in yourself. I don't know who knows that you know?

737
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 1: That could be very true. I don't know.

738
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:04,120
Speaker 2: I don't feel desperate, but I'm like, well, it triggers

739
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:06,359
Speaker 2: me in other people, Like I don't know what I'm saying.

740
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:08,160
Speaker 1: Just because you don't connect with someone doesn't mean that

741
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:11,960
Speaker 1: person is you Yeah, yeah, yeah's true, Like you don't

742
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:14,840
Speaker 1: like people who are desperate, doesn't mean that I were desperate.

743
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 1: This person asked, if you could give your younger self

744
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,200
Speaker 1: any advice, what would you say? I like this because

745
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:26,239
Speaker 1: of the topic we're on. Yes, what would you say

746
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 1: to your younger self? I don't even know.

747
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 2: Honestly, I would say, like, really stick, I know we

748
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 2: just said it, but full circle, I would say, your

749
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:40,160
Speaker 2: choices and actions have consequences, because when I was younger,

750
00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:44,400
Speaker 2: I was making bad choices. Yeah, I'm talking like I

751
00:38:44,440 --> 00:38:46,319
Speaker 2: mean this is when I was, you know, twenty two,

752
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:51,040
Speaker 2: but like drinking and driving, like really terrible, terrible, nasty

753
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:54,480
Speaker 2: decisions like that. Kyle almost broke when the first year

754
00:38:54,480 --> 00:38:56,640
Speaker 2: we dated, he almost broke up with me because I

755
00:38:56,880 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 2: were drinking. Well, he found out that I drank drove

756
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:02,800
Speaker 2: and he's like I don't stand for that, Like that's

757
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:05,160
Speaker 2: like that's the one that he was like, I'm you

758
00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:06,920
Speaker 2: can go do that with someone else, but not me,

759
00:39:07,160 --> 00:39:09,560
Speaker 2: And I didn't since then, but I would basically just

760
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,680
Speaker 2: tell myself like I was like an asshole to certain

761
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 2: people I'm talking to, like men are like used people.

762
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:18,279
Speaker 2: This was before Kyle but like used men and then

763
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:20,680
Speaker 2: like when they showed some sort of emotion, I made

764
00:39:20,719 --> 00:39:23,480
Speaker 2: them feel like, Okay, no, this was just a hookup,

765
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:26,000
Speaker 2: like and like I hurt people's feelings, And I would

766
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:30,160
Speaker 2: just say, like, your actions have your actions and choices

767
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:32,000
Speaker 2: have consequences, and you need to think about that.

768
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,080
Speaker 1: That's what I would say, Okay, oh yeah that. I

769
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:36,959
Speaker 1: don't even know what I would tell my younger self

770
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:40,839
Speaker 1: because I feel like there's so much that has been

771
00:39:40,920 --> 00:39:44,000
Speaker 1: positive that's come out of my life, and I don't

772
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 1: think that i'd be where I am without every move

773
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:51,080
Speaker 1: that I made. I think I would just tell her

774
00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 1: to like give herself some grace and show yourself some

775
00:39:55,040 --> 00:40:00,319
Speaker 1: compassion and don't beat yourself up, because like I don't

776
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:02,200
Speaker 1: even need people to beat me up. Like I'll do

777
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:04,480
Speaker 1: that enough for the both of us. You know, if

778
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 1: you think I say things and like every post that

779
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 1: I do, I will sit and think about for hours,

780
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:13,760
Speaker 1: like why did I post? Like I hate social media?

781
00:40:14,239 --> 00:40:18,600
Speaker 1: Every story I post, every photo, video, whatever it may be,

782
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 1: Like I sit there and obsess over it for hours,

783
00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,400
Speaker 1: going you know, what are people going to think? What

784
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:24,919
Speaker 1: are people going to say? And I have to talk

785
00:40:25,000 --> 00:40:28,360
Speaker 1: myself through it, and then you know, so when people

786
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:31,319
Speaker 1: say like you're a badass and don't care about certain things, No,

787
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: I care a lot. I've just tried my best to

788
00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:38,719
Speaker 1: put the tools that I have to good use on

789
00:40:39,040 --> 00:40:43,399
Speaker 1: getting over it so that it doesn't it doesn't become debilitating. Yeah,

790
00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:46,359
Speaker 1: it doesn't keep me from living life and being outspoken.

791
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:47,160
Speaker 2: Yeah.

792
00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:51,120
Speaker 1: I almost feel like, am I too hyper sensitive to things?

793
00:40:51,160 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 1: Am I seeing things for what they are? Like? Is

794
00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:57,320
Speaker 1: the world really getting to a place where it's evil

795
00:40:57,320 --> 00:40:59,680
Speaker 1: and I can't understand it? Am I making this up?

796
00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:02,319
Speaker 1: In my mind? I spiral over these things. Do I

797
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 1: share my thoughts or do I just shut the fuck up?

798
00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:07,680
Speaker 2: I think a lot of people appreciate you sharing your thoughts.

799
00:41:08,280 --> 00:41:12,680
Speaker 2: Question off of that, around this time two years ago,

800
00:41:12,719 --> 00:41:16,160
Speaker 2: what would you tell yourself and what do you hope

801
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:19,680
Speaker 2: yourself a year from now will feel?

802
00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:23,400
Speaker 1: I think when this all happened, what I would have

803
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:26,719
Speaker 1: told myself? Just I don't think I would have told

804
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:27,880
Speaker 1: myself anything.

805
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:30,719
Speaker 2: Two years ago. No, you would let yourself just experience

806
00:41:30,880 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 2: what's coming.

807
00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:37,520
Speaker 1: I had to. I experienced everything. I mean, there's going

808
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:38,960
Speaker 1: to be a day where I'm going to have to

809
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:44,080
Speaker 1: do intense therapy to like not have trust issues anymore.

810
00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 1: But as far as like just the hand that I

811
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:53,640
Speaker 1: was dealt in this situation, it was like I did everything.

812
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 1: I was in survival mode and to think about the

813
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 1: things that I and having to go through, and you

814
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:05,040
Speaker 1: have to remember this is not if it just affected me,

815
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:09,319
Speaker 1: we would be in a very different situation. I can

816
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:13,440
Speaker 1: get over things, I really can. But when you have

817
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,239
Speaker 1: a little innocent human that you brought into the world

818
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:20,319
Speaker 1: who had no say in the matter at all, and

819
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:25,520
Speaker 1: you're you giving up because it's easier for you, the

820
00:42:25,640 --> 00:42:29,240
Speaker 1: child is going to suffer those consequences. So there's nothing

821
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:33,520
Speaker 1: I could have told myself back then except for reminding

822
00:42:33,560 --> 00:42:37,760
Speaker 1: myself every day that everything is temporary, nothing is forever.

823
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:41,560
Speaker 1: You know, like this will come to an end. I

824
00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:43,719
Speaker 1: don't know what the end is going to look like,

825
00:42:44,560 --> 00:42:47,680
Speaker 1: but I have to just have faith that whoever is

826
00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 1: looking out for Ocean, her wellbeing will be protected in

827
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 1: the end period. So I have to believe that something

828
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:58,759
Speaker 1: greater than myself, something greater than Ocean, is looking out

829
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:01,480
Speaker 1: for her. I'm going to be just fine. Yeah, there's

830
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:05,000
Speaker 1: a bigger thing happening here, and it's not just about me,

831
00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:08,440
Speaker 1: and it's not just about ocean. It's about what's wrong.

832
00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 1: This is about what is broken in the system. And

833
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 1: I'm a privileged person. I can't imagine what some people

834
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:21,600
Speaker 1: go through in this system. It is beyond heartbreaking. So

835
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,600
Speaker 1: I would just tell myself that things are temporary and

836
00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:29,280
Speaker 1: then moving forward, a year from now, I'll be free.

837
00:43:29,480 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 2: Yeah you will. And not to confuse anyone, Sorry I

838
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:34,000
Speaker 2: said two years ago. It was only a year and

839
00:43:34,040 --> 00:43:35,920
Speaker 2: a few months ago. I didn't want to confuse. I

840
00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:37,440
Speaker 2: don't know why I thought it was two years ago.

841
00:43:37,680 --> 00:43:42,080
Speaker 1: You're fine. I also want to say I know that

842
00:43:42,160 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 1: it's been a year and some change of podcasts that

843
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:48,360
Speaker 1: are all over the place, and I want to thank

844
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 1: everyone for allowing me to go from like really funny

845
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:55,520
Speaker 1: talk about sex and all of these things, to going

846
00:43:55,640 --> 00:44:00,400
Speaker 1: deep and sobbing to ending on a high note. I

847
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:05,959
Speaker 1: know this podcast is very intense. I just just roll

848
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:08,960
Speaker 1: with me. Guys. I'm praying that it ends soon, but

849
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:11,920
Speaker 1: like I'm in it. This is my life.

850
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:15,919
Speaker 2: You're giving them Lalla, which when we asked a few

851
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:18,600
Speaker 2: months ago, what do you guys want? So many messages

852
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 2: said more Lalla more her life more her, this, more

853
00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:23,040
Speaker 2: her that, and this is your life.

854
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:26,480
Speaker 1: This is my teachable moment. Lala, We're gonna see if

855
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:29,200
Speaker 1: you do know how to shut the fuck up. Yeah.

856
00:44:29,239 --> 00:44:32,920
Speaker 2: It's hard though, because allala that shut the fuck shuts

857
00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 2: the fuck up. It's not a world I want to

858
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:35,239
Speaker 2: live in.

859
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:36,919
Speaker 1: I don't want to live in that world either.

860
00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:40,239
Speaker 2: It's like, that's not you. You give your opinion and

861
00:44:40,280 --> 00:44:42,560
Speaker 2: it helps people. It's not like you give your opinion

862
00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:44,960
Speaker 2: on a lot of things and people are like, this

863
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:47,920
Speaker 2: just ruined my day. Thanks a lot. We get dms

864
00:44:47,960 --> 00:44:50,520
Speaker 2: that are like, thank you so much, I've gone through

865
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,960
Speaker 2: this blah blah blah blah blah. She keeps me going,

866
00:44:53,239 --> 00:44:54,120
Speaker 2: so all.

867
00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:56,400
Speaker 1: Right, I love that. Mm hmmm. This person wants to know,

868
00:44:56,480 --> 00:45:01,680
Speaker 1: did you experience physical withdrawal when you stop drinking? Ooh ooh,

869
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: good question. Yes you did. Oh yeah, like the cold

870
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:12,480
Speaker 1: sweats and jitters and like not. I mean, luckily I

871
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 1: didn't have to go to a treatment center. I did

872
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:19,680
Speaker 1: tell my sober coach, the first person I reached out

873
00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:22,680
Speaker 1: to when I got sober. She said, with what you're

874
00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:25,040
Speaker 1: telling me because I shared my story, She said, I

875
00:45:25,120 --> 00:45:27,360
Speaker 1: would highly recommend that you go to a treatment center.

876
00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: This sounds very intense, and I said, I am so

877
00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:36,000
Speaker 1: in this that I don't feel like I need a

878
00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:38,520
Speaker 1: treatment center, which, by the way, if you need one, go,

879
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:44,520
Speaker 1: but I knew mentally I'm fucking done like it ends

880
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 1: to like it ended, We're done now. I just need

881
00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 1: you to help me stay here, I said. If I relapse,

882
00:45:51,320 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 1: then I'll check in same day, no problem. But I

883
00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:57,360
Speaker 1: did have the withdrawals.

884
00:45:57,600 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 2: You're dead, Yeah, is that like nausea, shay sweating?

885
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:03,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was just like the cold sweats and like

886
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 1: a deep depression. But it was like it was a definite,

887
00:46:07,120 --> 00:46:10,239
Speaker 1: like physical reaction to not I mean, my body had

888
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:12,600
Speaker 1: been used to it for a really long time and

889
00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 1: super heavily. After my dad died. It was like morning

890
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:17,560
Speaker 1: until I passed out. Wow.

891
00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:19,560
Speaker 2: Is there anything that you could do, just in case

892
00:46:19,600 --> 00:46:21,880
Speaker 2: anyone's going through this that helps? Is it like or

893
00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 2: is it like? No, you just gotta get through it.

894
00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: That's the thing is everyone's addiction looks different. So I

895
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:31,239
Speaker 1: don't want to see Because I'm no doctor, I just

896
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:34,280
Speaker 1: can speak from my personal experience. So if you told

897
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:36,640
Speaker 1: me that you were exactly like me, then I would say,

898
00:46:36,640 --> 00:46:39,760
Speaker 1: like you got this. But I do, like I've always said,

899
00:46:40,160 --> 00:46:44,719
Speaker 1: take advantage of people who are experts in fields, like

900
00:46:45,120 --> 00:46:47,560
Speaker 1: reach out to them. They're here for us when we

901
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:53,040
Speaker 1: need them, like take advantage of it. And but rehab

902
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:57,480
Speaker 1: is expensive. I know, it's beyond expensive. And that's why

903
00:46:57,560 --> 00:47:00,799
Speaker 1: I'm grateful for the program that I'm in, because it

904
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:05,279
Speaker 1: doesn't matter where you come from, what your financial situation is,

905
00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:09,319
Speaker 1: You're welcome at any point in time to come here

906
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:10,319
Speaker 1: for free.

907
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:14,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's amazing. It's like everything costs money nowadays, and

908
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 2: one of the most incredible programs that has helped millions

909
00:47:18,160 --> 00:47:19,320
Speaker 2: of people is free.

910
00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:22,680
Speaker 1: I know, and I always feel guilty because when I'm

911
00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:25,560
Speaker 1: in my meetings, you know, we talk about how the

912
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:30,560
Speaker 1: program should not be brought into radio television, and I

913
00:47:30,600 --> 00:47:33,080
Speaker 1: talk about the program a lot. Obviously, I would never

914
00:47:33,239 --> 00:47:37,400
Speaker 1: share anyone else's experience because it's anonymous, but I just

915
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:41,960
Speaker 1: feel this need to share that, like this program has

916
00:47:42,080 --> 00:47:47,920
Speaker 1: saved my life in not just drinking in many areas

917
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:51,200
Speaker 1: where like I'm having a rough day and I'm not

918
00:47:51,520 --> 00:47:53,600
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna drink. I don't need a meeting because

919
00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:55,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm gonna drink. I'm just having a

920
00:47:55,080 --> 00:47:57,439
Speaker 1: rough day. I step in that meeting and I leave

921
00:47:57,880 --> 00:47:59,840
Speaker 1: feeling like I could take on the world. I'm revived.

922
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 2: I think it's beautiful sharing it. I mean, I understand,

923
00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:05,640
Speaker 2: I don't understand, like I've never been in it, but

924
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:09,879
Speaker 2: normalizing being able to say, if you want to, yeah,

925
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 2: I go to aa ar. I because on another podcast

926
00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:16,000
Speaker 2: I listened to armtare Expert. He always talks about his program,

927
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,879
Speaker 2: being in the program in sobriety, you talk about it.

928
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:20,440
Speaker 2: I think it's.

929
00:48:20,280 --> 00:48:23,440
Speaker 1: Incredible, the fears you have raising a little girl in

930
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:27,880
Speaker 1: a world like we have right now. Oh well, I

931
00:48:27,960 --> 00:48:32,560
Speaker 1: watched twenty twenty on the Idaho University murders last night,

932
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 1: and I was like, that's it. Ocean's not going to

933
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:37,799
Speaker 1: college anywhere. Yeah, she can go to college where I live.

934
00:48:38,200 --> 00:48:40,759
Speaker 1: This is where she'll be staying. I will drop her

935
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:43,560
Speaker 1: off at school, I will wait for her to be done,

936
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:46,640
Speaker 1: I will walk her to her next class, and then

937
00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:51,000
Speaker 1: I'll take her home. This couple who was madly in

938
00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:53,879
Speaker 1: love and all of a sudden, you know, he's they've

939
00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 1: got children, and then they get divorced and he's put

940
00:48:56,600 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 1: a hit out on his wife. Okay, you're never getting married.

941
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:03,359
Speaker 1: I had a lot of fears. My biggest one though,

942
00:49:03,360 --> 00:49:07,959
Speaker 1: was social media at a young age, because Ocean really

943
00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:11,719
Speaker 1: isn't into like electronics right now. I had this I

944
00:49:11,760 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 1: have an ancient iPad and I just cleared off last

945
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:18,680
Speaker 1: night and I'm like, and Mom's like, you need to

946
00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:20,560
Speaker 1: order a case. And I'm like, I don't even know

947
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:23,880
Speaker 1: what decade my bad is from how I was supposed to

948
00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:25,640
Speaker 1: order a case. I don't even think they make cases.

949
00:49:25,680 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to eBay that shit. But she like

950
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:31,120
Speaker 1: had no interest in it. I was showing her all

951
00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:32,760
Speaker 1: of these things that she can do on the iPad,

952
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:35,240
Speaker 1: and she was like, she had no interest. She wanted

953
00:49:35,280 --> 00:49:37,560
Speaker 1: to go and play with her, like cleaning supplies that

954
00:49:37,600 --> 00:49:40,600
Speaker 1: I got her. She loves cleaning the house and my

955
00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:43,399
Speaker 1: mom last met yesterday. She was like, Okay, now get

956
00:49:43,640 --> 00:49:48,359
Speaker 1: because my housekeeper who you know her? I love her

957
00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:51,280
Speaker 1: so much. So she says, God, bless you, La Lah,

958
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:52,920
Speaker 1: thank you so much. And I'm like, why are you

959
00:49:52,960 --> 00:49:56,800
Speaker 1: thinking me like you're you are you keep your energy,

960
00:49:56,920 --> 00:50:01,160
Speaker 1: keeps my life together. She's amazing. She's amazing. Unfortunately, she

961
00:50:01,239 --> 00:50:03,880
Speaker 1: was in a car accident so she can't work for

962
00:50:03,920 --> 00:50:05,360
Speaker 1: the next month, and she was like, I hope my

963
00:50:05,480 --> 00:50:08,359
Speaker 1: job is still there. I was like, girl, don't worry

964
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:10,640
Speaker 1: about the job, Like, I just want to make sure

965
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:14,319
Speaker 1: you're okay. Yeah, and my mother, I'm watching her and

966
00:50:14,320 --> 00:50:18,719
Speaker 1: she's telling Ocean to clean underneath this table and I

967
00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:21,360
Speaker 1: was like, yo, you really are putting her to work.

968
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:24,360
Speaker 2: She but I've seen her with like that little broom.

969
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:25,160
Speaker 2: She loves it.

970
00:50:25,480 --> 00:50:27,120
Speaker 1: She loves it.

971
00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:28,680
Speaker 2: That's really cute.

972
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:31,080
Speaker 1: So she would rather do that than like be on electronics.

973
00:50:31,120 --> 00:50:32,600
Speaker 1: I don't think that's going to be it for everything.

974
00:50:32,640 --> 00:50:37,480
Speaker 1: She's only you know, twenty two months, so the phone

975
00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:39,280
Speaker 1: scares me. I'm worried that she's gonna go to school,

976
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:41,600
Speaker 1: come home. Tell me that Elizabeth has a new iPhone

977
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:44,239
Speaker 1: and she wants it. And Elizabeth has Instagram. Why can

978
00:50:44,320 --> 00:50:46,400
Speaker 1: I have Instagram? It's like, you ain't have an Instagram.

979
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:50,160
Speaker 2: Kate Winslet, she was the one in the Titanic, right, Yeah,

980
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,040
Speaker 2: made a video the other day and she was like,

981
00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:55,560
Speaker 2: and I loved it, but she was like, yeah, my

982
00:50:55,680 --> 00:50:58,120
Speaker 2: kids don't have It's not exactly this, so don't quote me,

983
00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:00,239
Speaker 2: but she was basically saying it's okay to I tell

984
00:51:00,239 --> 00:51:02,799
Speaker 2: your kids no my kids don't have social media. My

985
00:51:02,920 --> 00:51:05,560
Speaker 2: kids don't use iPhones all the time. Like She's like,

986
00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:09,719
Speaker 2: it's okay, Like they're gonna be pissed at you, and

987
00:51:09,880 --> 00:51:12,279
Speaker 2: that's okay. You're just gonna have to tell them like

988
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:15,760
Speaker 2: this is why, this is how I feel, and life

989
00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:17,680
Speaker 2: goes on. And I was like, yeah, that's a great,

990
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:20,319
Speaker 2: that's a good thing. I mean, I'm gonna be a

991
00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:22,839
Speaker 2: helicopter parent. I don't like all the things you just said,

992
00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:25,200
Speaker 2: like I'm gonna walk you to school. You're not going

993
00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:28,920
Speaker 2: to college. I'm like, yes, that's but like they gotta live.

994
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 1: They do have to bill rebellry. Yeah, no, they will rebel.

995
00:51:33,360 --> 00:51:36,239
Speaker 1: I watched friends in high school rebel like the strict

996
00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:40,719
Speaker 1: Mormon kids giving blowies behind the bleachers and me I

997
00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:42,960
Speaker 1: was like, no, that is naughty.

998
00:51:43,719 --> 00:51:45,920
Speaker 2: And you had a very open family. I was a

999
00:51:45,960 --> 00:51:49,160
Speaker 2: rebeller because I had a very drink you know, drinking

1000
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:51,600
Speaker 2: at fifteen. Like let's because I had a family who

1001
00:51:51,640 --> 00:51:54,279
Speaker 2: was like no alcohol, no sex, know this.

1002
00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:56,839
Speaker 1: But then again, I didn't have my first drink until

1003
00:51:56,840 --> 00:51:59,799
Speaker 1: I had graduated from high school. And I'm in a

1004
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:03,120
Speaker 1: so I don't know. Yeah, we just come how we

1005
00:52:03,160 --> 00:52:08,000
Speaker 1: are like Ocean. Because there's a group of moms, it's

1006
00:52:08,120 --> 00:52:10,399
Speaker 1: natural for us to be like, oh, so and so

1007
00:52:10,560 --> 00:52:13,000
Speaker 1: is doing this that Ocean's not doing, or Ocean's doing

1008
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:14,880
Speaker 1: something that so and so is not doing. Like we

1009
00:52:14,960 --> 00:52:19,680
Speaker 1: have these conversations and I tell people they come exactly

1010
00:52:19,680 --> 00:52:22,400
Speaker 1: how they are. I haven't done anything specific with Ocean

1011
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:25,200
Speaker 1: that has made her into.

1012
00:52:26,080 --> 00:52:32,080
Speaker 2: A genius, perfect child that she is. No, she's so sweet,

1013
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:36,560
Speaker 2: like the video we posted on the podcast Instagram last

1014
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:39,440
Speaker 2: week of her holding Summer Moon's hand.

1015
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:42,200
Speaker 1: She's sweet. She's very sweet.

1016
00:52:42,239 --> 00:52:44,959
Speaker 2: And I think they're like good friends now, aren't they

1017
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:48,960
Speaker 2: Ocean's Summer Moon. Oh yeah, that is so cute that

1018
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:50,200
Speaker 2: it's so cute, and.

1019
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 1: Says someer Moon Moon, and so goes.

1020
00:52:55,000 --> 00:52:58,359
Speaker 2: Oh Sin, Ohsin, and they give each other hugs and

1021
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:01,080
Speaker 2: they like sit on the couch and watch TV together.

1022
00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:02,319
Speaker 1: And then we have to teach them how to share.

1023
00:53:02,360 --> 00:53:05,200
Speaker 1: There were many meltdowns in Palm Springs this weekend over

1024
00:53:05,239 --> 00:53:09,520
Speaker 1: this fucking like block thing, and Sena sees so she

1025
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:12,160
Speaker 1: is the type where she goes, I have another one.

1026
00:53:12,880 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 1: I'm the type where if you can't share, ain't no

1027
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:20,160
Speaker 1: one playing with it? Right? So pick either sit down

1028
00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:22,200
Speaker 1: and share it or it's being taken away.

1029
00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:25,920
Speaker 2: That's a great question. And I know we're like running

1030
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:29,120
Speaker 2: low on time, but as two mothers who are friends

1031
00:53:29,200 --> 00:53:32,680
Speaker 2: who parent differently, every mother parents differently, does that get harder?

1032
00:53:32,719 --> 00:53:34,560
Speaker 2: Do you guys kind of figure out ways around it?

1033
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:37,799
Speaker 2: Like the sharing, Like you kind of like, okay, well

1034
00:53:37,840 --> 00:53:39,560
Speaker 2: I would take the toy away, but if you have

1035
00:53:39,600 --> 00:53:40,240
Speaker 2: another one.

1036
00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:43,680
Speaker 1: You know, I'm kind of laid back if she wants

1037
00:53:43,719 --> 00:53:46,719
Speaker 1: to give summer. If they has another one, she wants

1038
00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:49,239
Speaker 1: to give it, great. Yeah it I'm more of like,

1039
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 1: you know, take the toy. I don't care if you

1040
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,160
Speaker 1: have a meltdown. Yeah, you're not playing with it. You

1041
00:53:55,640 --> 00:53:58,440
Speaker 1: either share or no one gets it. Like they were

1042
00:53:58,480 --> 00:54:01,359
Speaker 1: also fighting over this drawn and my mom goes, well,

1043
00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:03,480
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna order one on Amazon so the

1044
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:04,960
Speaker 1: next time we come they both have the same one

1045
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:06,600
Speaker 1: and they don't have to fight over it. I said, no,

1046
00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:12,279
Speaker 1: I'm not teaching Ocean that if she has a meltdown

1047
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:14,600
Speaker 1: that means that we just go buy her one of

1048
00:54:14,640 --> 00:54:18,040
Speaker 1: her own. No, it's I said, she has a drawing pad,

1049
00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:21,479
Speaker 1: but it's not like that. My mom says, I don't

1050
00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:22,160
Speaker 1: give a damn.

1051
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:25,400
Speaker 2: Do you realize this is so funny what you just

1052
00:54:25,440 --> 00:54:27,600
Speaker 2: did because you said, Ocean comes how she is, it's

1053
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:29,640
Speaker 2: nothing I've done to make her so sweet, And then

1054
00:54:29,680 --> 00:54:32,000
Speaker 2: you literally proceeded to say all the things that would

1055
00:54:32,040 --> 00:54:35,600
Speaker 2: make a child sweet and so it is your parenting.

1056
00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:37,600
Speaker 1: Okay, I guess it is. I don't know.

1057
00:54:38,360 --> 00:54:40,759
Speaker 2: Those are like, yes, those are the things that would

1058
00:54:40,800 --> 00:54:43,319
Speaker 2: make a child sweet and share and not you know.

1059
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:46,040
Speaker 1: That's true because Ocean now counts to ten and we

1060
00:54:46,160 --> 00:54:49,640
Speaker 1: like put on that Miss Rachel, which has like, well

1061
00:54:49,680 --> 00:54:52,719
Speaker 1: you're gonna know, you're gonna know. My mom and I

1062
00:54:52,760 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 1: look at each other and go like, I fucking hate this?

1063
00:54:56,840 --> 00:54:58,279
Speaker 1: Is it a YouTube all moms do?

1064
00:54:58,480 --> 00:54:58,680
Speaker 2: Yes?

1065
00:54:58,680 --> 00:55:02,399
Speaker 1: And it has like fifty minutes views just this woman who,

1066
00:55:02,600 --> 00:55:04,960
Speaker 1: by the way, you can just tell she's just her

1067
00:55:05,400 --> 00:55:08,839
Speaker 1: life calling was to teach children because Ocean's in her,

1068
00:55:09,520 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 1: in her covered in food, in her high chair with

1069
00:55:12,239 --> 00:55:19,600
Speaker 1: her arms in the air. One do three. That's so cute,

1070
00:55:19,800 --> 00:55:23,200
Speaker 1: loving every second of it, which is like, Okay, this

1071
00:55:23,280 --> 00:55:24,839
Speaker 1: is totally worth it just watching you.

1072
00:55:24,880 --> 00:55:30,000
Speaker 2: But this is some you're gonna know, Miss Rachel.

1073
00:55:30,600 --> 00:55:33,239
Speaker 1: Miss Rachel on YouTube.

1074
00:55:34,120 --> 00:55:36,120
Speaker 2: See now, maybe if I could go back in life,

1075
00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:38,839
Speaker 2: I would make YouTube kids videos because.

1076
00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:45,440
Speaker 1: My god, I mean in the YouTube with Miss Rachel. Yeah,

1077
00:55:45,560 --> 00:55:47,479
Speaker 1: someone plays the guitar and teaches them how to crawl

1078
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:48,040
Speaker 1: like a crab.

1079
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:52,400
Speaker 2: That's so cute. Are they is this like good production

1080
00:55:52,680 --> 00:55:54,280
Speaker 2: or are they just like in their living.

1081
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:56,640
Speaker 1: Room not at all? Not good? Like a green screen

1082
00:55:57,680 --> 00:55:59,360
Speaker 1: that's awesome and with horrible lighting.

1083
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:01,479
Speaker 2: Good because the kids don't care.

1084
00:56:01,680 --> 00:56:04,279
Speaker 1: No, the kids don't care. And ocean yeah is a

1085
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:06,400
Speaker 1: learning from miss Rachel. I will tell you what.

1086
00:56:07,800 --> 00:56:12,520
Speaker 2: Yes, counting colors. She's so smart. Yeah, I was like,

1087
00:56:12,640 --> 00:56:14,960
Speaker 2: this is I like, picked up a marker the other

1088
00:56:15,040 --> 00:56:16,839
Speaker 2: day and went to tell Oshan it was a blue

1089
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:19,279
Speaker 2: marker and went to say, this is blue. And before

1090
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 2: I could get anything out, she goes blue. I was like, well, okay,

1091
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:25,759
Speaker 2: I can't teach you any I can't teach you nothing she.

1092
00:56:25,719 --> 00:56:31,600
Speaker 1: Got Miss Rachel. So you're right, there are things. But

1093
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:34,480
Speaker 1: what's interesting is Brock and I kind of parent the

1094
00:56:34,480 --> 00:56:34,919
Speaker 1: same way.

1095
00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:39,520
Speaker 2: I could see that. I could see that, yeah, from.

1096
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:42,359
Speaker 1: Marion will go down for a nap and Sina will

1097
00:56:43,160 --> 00:56:46,560
Speaker 1: you know Summer's crying? Yeah, and she is so cute.

1098
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:48,560
Speaker 1: She's like, I don't want her to be traumatized. And

1099
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:52,360
Speaker 1: I'm like, Sina, she's in a beautiful home in Palm Springs,

1100
00:56:52,400 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 1: in a fabulous she is not going to be traumatized

1101
00:56:55,480 --> 00:56:59,080
Speaker 1: by this, Okay, She's gonna be just fine. Where Like

1102
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:03,120
Speaker 1: Ocean was down for a nap, she wakes up literally

1103
00:57:03,160 --> 00:57:05,760
Speaker 1: cries for two seconds, and she was like, Ocean's crying,

1104
00:57:06,280 --> 00:57:09,160
Speaker 1: and I was like, I hear her. She's fine, she'll

1105
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:13,879
Speaker 1: figure it out. She's still going. Ifive ten minutes past,

1106
00:57:14,040 --> 00:57:16,480
Speaker 1: she's still going, I'll go in there. But right now

1107
00:57:16,960 --> 00:57:19,520
Speaker 1: she's just maybe searching for her bottle. Yeah, I know

1108
00:57:19,600 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 1: the cry.

1109
00:57:20,760 --> 00:57:23,440
Speaker 2: You know the cry if there was something wrong, you

1110
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:26,040
Speaker 2: would know. That's the kind of mom I want to be.

1111
00:57:26,360 --> 00:57:27,760
Speaker 2: And I don't think I'm gonna be that way. And

1112
00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:29,600
Speaker 2: that's okay. It's gonna take work. But even now, I

1113
00:57:29,640 --> 00:57:33,680
Speaker 2: could tell I'm helicopter, and like even when you're I'm

1114
00:57:33,720 --> 00:57:36,440
Speaker 2: sitting in the office with like you and Lisa, and

1115
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:38,920
Speaker 2: we'll be eating lunch, and like I'll walk to the

1116
00:57:39,000 --> 00:57:41,000
Speaker 2: kitchen and bring Ocean with me and get a snack

1117
00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:44,280
Speaker 2: for myself. Yeah, like trail mix and I'll pour it

1118
00:57:44,480 --> 00:57:47,560
Speaker 2: like little pieces or whatever, get whatever for myself and

1119
00:57:47,600 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 2: I'll pour it in my hand. And I know Ocean

1120
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:51,840
Speaker 2: has to eat lunch. And I know that you and

1121
00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:54,439
Speaker 2: Lisa are like Ocean has to eat lunch. But if

1122
00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:57,800
Speaker 2: she like points to an eminem, I can't not give

1123
00:57:57,840 --> 00:58:00,240
Speaker 2: it to her. And like the other day I brought

1124
00:58:00,240 --> 00:58:02,040
Speaker 2: her back in here and she like pointed to an

1125
00:58:02,080 --> 00:58:04,400
Speaker 2: eminem I was eating, and I was like, okay, you

1126
00:58:04,400 --> 00:58:05,919
Speaker 2: could have it, and I like broke it and gave

1127
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:08,640
Speaker 2: her a piece. And then I heard Lisa go like, no, Ocean,

1128
00:58:08,680 --> 00:58:10,160
Speaker 2: you have to eat your lunch. And I'm like, damn it.

1129
00:58:10,200 --> 00:58:11,960
Speaker 2: I know, but it's so hard for me, Like I

1130
00:58:12,000 --> 00:58:14,880
Speaker 2: want to give them everything they want, I know, and

1131
00:58:14,920 --> 00:58:16,919
Speaker 2: that's like not the way you mother. I just want

1132
00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:20,120
Speaker 2: to like you want it, you got it totally. It's hard,

1133
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:21,680
Speaker 2: and I think I'm not I'm just gonna have to

1134
00:58:21,680 --> 00:58:23,920
Speaker 2: be thank god I have Kyle because I'm just gonna

1135
00:58:23,960 --> 00:58:26,200
Speaker 2: like have to work because even with Margot, he's like

1136
00:58:27,320 --> 00:58:29,920
Speaker 2: you let her. When I met Kyle, Margot was a

1137
00:58:29,960 --> 00:58:32,320
Speaker 2: perfect dog. And now she like begs and does all

1138
00:58:32,360 --> 00:58:32,760
Speaker 2: the things.

1139
00:58:32,880 --> 00:58:34,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, but isn't she getting older?

1140
00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:35,040
Speaker 2: She's getting older.

1141
00:58:35,080 --> 00:58:39,480
Speaker 1: She's just's Yeah, Lily begs eats things off the table now,

1142
00:58:39,560 --> 00:58:41,400
Speaker 1: and I'm like, you know what, you deserve it.

1143
00:58:41,480 --> 00:58:43,440
Speaker 2: And they have short lives. They don't live to fifty.

1144
00:58:43,560 --> 00:58:46,680
Speaker 1: Eat off the table, eat off the table again. I

1145
00:58:46,760 --> 00:58:49,720
Speaker 1: got much bigger things to worry about than Lily eating

1146
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:52,720
Speaker 1: all of Ocean's lunch off the table when she's finished

1147
00:58:52,720 --> 00:58:53,000
Speaker 1: with it.

1148
00:58:53,160 --> 00:58:54,760
Speaker 2: But it's good to see you as a mom because

1149
00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:57,120
Speaker 2: I'm like clocking it and like, Okay, you can be

1150
00:58:57,280 --> 00:58:59,880
Speaker 2: chill and your child can cry and it's not going

1151
00:59:00,120 --> 00:59:01,360
Speaker 2: to like be traumatized.

1152
00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:03,680
Speaker 1: She's not gonna shouldn't live the dream.

1153
00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:05,880
Speaker 2: I know that what I'm saying. She's like the most

1154
00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:08,960
Speaker 2: sweet the sweetest child. And I'm like, okay, I need

1155
00:59:08,960 --> 00:59:09,360
Speaker 2: to learn.

1156
00:59:09,480 --> 00:59:12,840
Speaker 1: I will tell you something. Even when you put your

1157
00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:16,280
Speaker 1: kid in check, they're still running. Shit. Imagine if you don't, oh,

1158
00:59:16,280 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 1: they're running. I've never I'm like, how am I in

1159
00:59:19,000 --> 00:59:22,240
Speaker 1: negotiation with a chick who can't even put a full

1160
00:59:22,280 --> 00:59:23,360
Speaker 1: sentence together.

1161
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:29,600
Speaker 2: In negotiatation? That's so true, that's so funny.

1162
00:59:29,480 --> 00:59:34,200
Speaker 1: It's awesome. It really is awesome wild, you know. So

1163
00:59:34,520 --> 00:59:38,360
Speaker 1: that's what parent is like. There's my concerns, my life story.

1164
00:59:38,600 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 1: I love you guys so much thank you for tuning

1165
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:44,600
Speaker 1: into another chaotic episode of To Give Them La La Podcast,

1166
00:59:44,880 --> 00:59:48,040
Speaker 1: and I can't wait to talk to you guys next

1167
00:59:48,080 --> 00:59:48,320
Speaker 1: week