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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

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Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime podcast and we have.

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Speaker 2: Some foundational stories coming up for you.

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Speaker 1: But the thing is this foundation needs a little support

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Speaker 1: from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes and we'll

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Speaker 1: get into the episode.

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Speaker 3: My wife makes traveling miserable, and I accidentally told her

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Speaker 3: tell her how it is. My wife, thirty eight female,

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Speaker 3: and I thirty six male, have been together for eight years.

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Speaker 3: We live in my home state of Arkansas. She is

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Speaker 3: from San Diego. Every year she wants to visit home.

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Speaker 3: We used to fly, but since we have a kid,

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Speaker 3: now to female, she now insists on driving. By the way.

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Speaker 3: This comes from user ok cut ninety five ninety seven,

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Speaker 3: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

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Speaker 3: to the our slash Okay story. I'm subre at it.

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Speaker 3: I'm Dakota, I'm Carly. I have no problem using all

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Speaker 3: my vacation days for this since she lives here. Now

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Speaker 3: the problem is her overpacking. She used to fill my

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Speaker 3: cx seven completely, but work gave me a nine hundred

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Speaker 3: dollars car allowance and we use that to get a

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Speaker 3: full sized suburban. This time she loaded that full I

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Speaker 3: mean front passenger seat to the ceiling, so I cannot

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Speaker 3: see the mirrors fully. We didn't use hardly any of it.

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Speaker 3: Every stop I carried something into the hotel because she

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Speaker 3: was afraid it would get stolen. It's a three day

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Speaker 3: drive each way. Got through it, but I told her

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Speaker 3: she makes traveling miserable because she's also always late. I

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Speaker 3: tell her we're leaving at ten am, she might arrive

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Speaker 3: by noon. Every day we don't leave the hotel until twelve.

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Speaker 3: Then she insists we drive until midnight. It's exhausting and unfun. Anyway,

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Speaker 3: this weekend I was sent on a work conference. They

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Speaker 3: got me a sweet hotel room for a week at

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Speaker 3: a nice resort, and I was super excited. We were

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Speaker 3: originally going to leave the baby with my mom the

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Speaker 3: day before, though she cancels my mom to bring our

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Speaker 3: child instead fills the suburban full again. Mind you, it's

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Speaker 3: my work trip for five days and five nights. Most

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Speaker 3: of the stuff was just overpacking. She brought a tote

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Speaker 3: of blankets, one of towels, two tots of her clothes.

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Speaker 3: She makes it miserable because the hotel always gets cluttered,

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Speaker 3: and the night before we leave is always chaos, trying

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Speaker 3: to pack all her organizing stuff that never gets used.

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Speaker 3: She freaked out and told me, I just want to

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Speaker 3: go hook up and cheat at these things. She said

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Speaker 3: she's filing for divorce because I told her, quote, you're

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Speaker 3: overpacking and insisting we fill every vehicle and always being

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Speaker 3: late makes me miserable. We were three hours late leaving,

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Speaker 3: so I missed the networking opening night, where people in

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Speaker 3: my industry tend to connect. I missed the best vendor

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Speaker 3: events because she insisted I don't leave since she was

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Speaker 3: overwhelmed with how messy the hotel room was. Mind you,

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Speaker 3: it was all the stuff she brought she took out

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Speaker 3: of toats and never used, and then the toddler destroyed.

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Speaker 3: Am I the a hole?

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Speaker 4: I'm so confused.

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Speaker 5: They're married, Yes, okay.

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Speaker 2: They are married.

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Speaker 5: If she's always late, I don't lie to her about

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Speaker 5: the time you gotta leave or something.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there's I think at this point you need strategies

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Speaker 3: to work around your wife's behavior here, or just being like, hey,

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Speaker 3: we're gonna try doing the trip my way. We always

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Speaker 3: do the trip your way. Let's do the trip my way,

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Speaker 3: and then if she's like absolutely not, then you go okay, Well,

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Speaker 3: then have like a spa day while I go on

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Speaker 3: my work trip because we're.

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Speaker 5: Not going keep her occupied. You know your wife at

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Speaker 5: this point, you've been with her for at least two years,

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Speaker 5: because you have a two year old.

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Speaker 3: There's an edit here. Yes, I'm involved in raising our child.

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Speaker 3: I actually packed for our trip. I had one bag

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Speaker 3: for baby to go to moms with toys, diaper's, food,

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Speaker 3: et cetera. One large suitcase. I had a bag packed

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Speaker 3: for my wife and one for me. Yes, she has ADHD.

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Speaker 3: She always says she doesn't want to do this, then

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Speaker 3: when the trip comes she does it anyway. I am

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Speaker 3: not a cheater. She accused me of it last time

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Speaker 3: I went solo, and I'm exhausted. If she left me,

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Speaker 3: I think I would be done with relationships. My own

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Speaker 3: mental health is wrecked. My boss wasn't mad. He found

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Speaker 3: the whole thing hilarious when I told him my job

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Speaker 3: wasn't threatened, but to me, it felt like it was.

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Speaker 3: I've tried packing for both of us. I've tried to

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Speaker 3: just accept her issues, but it's gotten worse. When we

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Speaker 3: first got together, she needed a large checked bag for

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Speaker 3: a two day trip to Las Vegas. Now she needs

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Speaker 3: an entire suburban for a week long trip. One of

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Speaker 3: the main issues is the vehicle gets so full that

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Speaker 3: I can't even see the side mirrors. I've expressed how

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Speaker 3: unsafe that is, and she doesn't care, just yells that

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Speaker 3: I don't understand. Yes, she comes from a horder background,

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Speaker 3: and there's an update. Let's just get into it. About

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Speaker 3: a month ago, I told my wife she makes traveling

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Speaker 3: no fun. I posted before we left for our drive home,

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Speaker 3: and since then it's been a whirlwind. He got home

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Speaker 3: and I wanted to talk, but she said we were fine.

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Speaker 3: I called a counselor and got us couple's therapy and

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Speaker 3: set her up with one who specializes in trauma that

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Speaker 3: causes hoarding. She did not call a lawyer. She threatened

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Speaker 3: divorce again, so I dialed one on her phone, put

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Speaker 3: it on speaker, and walked away. Not my best moment.

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Speaker 3: It sounds like you might be ready to walk away

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Speaker 3: from this.

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Speaker 5: Soundsolt a regress.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, though, If my partner just like threatens divorce multiple times,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, here boop, oh, here's the divorce lawyer.

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Speaker 3: Do you want to talk to them?

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Speaker 5: She does sound like she's having an actual mental crisis though, well,

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Speaker 5: she's got ADHD.

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Speaker 3: She comes from a hoarding background, like.

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Speaker 5: He's specifically looking up a trauma therapist that specializes in

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Speaker 5: trauma that causes hoarding. So something has happened.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, being brought up in a hoarding house crazy.

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Speaker 3: Since then, we have attended four sessions together and she

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Speaker 3: has gone five times on her own. I spent all

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Speaker 3: my savings to hire people to come in and help

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Speaker 3: her clean. For a week. We threw away two forty

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Speaker 3: yard dumpsters fairly full of stuff. We cleaned out her car,

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Speaker 3: the one she puts my daughter in daily, and established

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Speaker 3: a routine or only her purse and diaper bag go

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Speaker 3: up front. The rest stays in the trunk only. I've

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Speaker 3: had to go through it daily and remove stuff. I

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Speaker 3: once let it go four days and it was full again.

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Speaker 3: We are going to see her family in December. I

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Speaker 3: made it very clear that if the vehicle is loaded full,

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Speaker 3: I'm going to the airport and flying with our daughter

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Speaker 3: while she can make the trip herself. We made the

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Speaker 3: packing lists already. The trunk of the suburban can be full,

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Speaker 3: but nothing above the trunk cover and nothing besides a

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Speaker 3: small cooler purse and diaper bag. Up front, I bought

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Speaker 3: refundable tickets for my daughter and me to fly to

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Speaker 3: and from San Diego. If she fills the vehicle and

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Speaker 3: throws a fit, now, how is our quality of life?

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Speaker 3: She seems happy. Her family says she's happier than ever.

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Speaker 3: She's always wanted a clean house and car, but fights

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Speaker 3: me when I clean up, even now, saying she was

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Speaker 3: about to do it. I am miserable. I'm constantly picking

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Speaker 3: up the car, the yard, in the house. I let

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Speaker 3: it go two days once and got screamed at for

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Speaker 3: sabotaging her. I talked to a lawyer myself not to

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Speaker 3: move forward, but to protect myself. My boss actually has

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Speaker 3: me in line for a promotion, which is great. The

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Speaker 3: only problem is if our marriage ends and she moves

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Speaker 3: back to California, then I would be stuck in a

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Speaker 3: two year deal at work. So I'm currently very nervous

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Speaker 3: about career advancement when I am miserable personally. And there's

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Speaker 3: an edit. I forgot to add the cheating part. She

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Speaker 3: confessed she was nervous I would cheat because I am

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Speaker 3: quote not the ugliest guy around, and you work hard,

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Speaker 3: so if you hate me, then you would have options.

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Speaker 5: Babe, babe, babe, you're not You're not ugly, per se,

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Speaker 5: you you could get out there.

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Speaker 3: It's like, this is like I don't think we've had

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Speaker 3: a story where the hoarding stuff is like so clearly

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Speaker 3: so bad. She's she's doing like hoarding behavior with her

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Speaker 3: own husband. She's like, well, it's like I have to

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Speaker 3: keep you around because like what if I need you,

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Speaker 3: like or like what if something tries to take you

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Speaker 3: away from me? And it's like I need that.

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Speaker 5: She's literally hoarding.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, people, that's horder trauma, like for sure, Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: that's your wife needs a lot of helpe with that.

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Speaker 3: But it can be a huge clearly, it can be

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Speaker 3: a huge strain on a marriage in a relationship.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, buddy, you still don't sound like you want to

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Speaker 5: be in this one.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I have no idea if she is cheating, and

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Speaker 3: I'm kind of at a point where I don't care.

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Speaker 3: I'm one hundred percent checked out and at number two,

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Speaker 3: so many responses, why haven't I cut the cord? Because

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Speaker 3: she's my wife and we said for better or worse?

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Speaker 3: How can I walk away from her when she is

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Speaker 3: not doing okay without giving it the good old college try. Plus,

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Speaker 3: I was raised that divorce is not an option. I

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Speaker 3: gave myself until Christmas twenty twenty six. If it's not

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Speaker 3: better by then, I'm pulling the plug. I'm picking up

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Speaker 3: every day because counseling said it would help, and also

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Speaker 3: because my daughter doesn't deserve this. I want a clean home,

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Speaker 3: so I do it myself. Is it defeating to come

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Speaker 3: home every day and find the kitchen table covered with

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Speaker 3: random stuff she got out because she was going to

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Speaker 3: bake but never did, and the bed covered with toats

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Speaker 3: of clothes she was going to sort. Sure? Do I

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Speaker 3: want to go through the guest room every three days

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Speaker 3: because she destroys it and I want it to be

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Speaker 3: guessed ready at all times. No, I don't, But that's

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Speaker 3: the price I pay. If I don't do it. Our

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Speaker 3: house is a mess and our kid doesn't deserve it.

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Speaker 3: If I leave, all I'm hurting is someone with mental illness.

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Speaker 3: All I am doing. If I leave, I am hurting

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Speaker 3: someone with mental illness. All I'm doing right now is

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Speaker 3: destroying myself. When I finally walk away, I can honestly

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Speaker 3: say I did my best. Yes, I am documenting her

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Speaker 3: car and the house when I get home and when

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Speaker 3: I leave. I'm probably enabling right now, but if it

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Speaker 3: goes the way it probably will, I'm going to be

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Speaker 3: fighting to keep my daughter. Part of this going above

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Speaker 3: and beyond is so that I can be the better parent,

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Speaker 3: because people were right before when they said I wasn't

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Speaker 3: protecting my kid. As for her claiming I'm sabotaging, I

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Speaker 3: must have worded it wrong. When I clean up, she

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Speaker 3: gets mad because she was going to do it in

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Speaker 3: a minute. Even though it's been days, we have a

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Speaker 3: little bit more story left.

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Speaker 5: I mean, it's like I feel like Buddy, like, yeah,

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Speaker 5: he's just gonna keep trying for I mean, from right

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Speaker 5: now over a year.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but I don't.

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Speaker 5: Know that I see it getting better unless she changes programs,

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Speaker 5: like you were saying.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I think Buddy, you also got to

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Speaker 3: like approach it with at least a little hope. You're like,

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Speaker 3: I'm one hundred percent checked out, And it's like if

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Speaker 3: that's the case, even if it does start better, you

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Speaker 3: might not even realize it because you're just like not there.

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Speaker 5: So also don't like he was like, I'm not gonna

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Speaker 5: take I might not want the promotion. If this is

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Speaker 5: gonna go bad in two years and she's gonna move home,

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Speaker 5: you're already saying that it's not going to go that

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Speaker 5: way for at least a year, So you're already a

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Speaker 5: whole year into that. It's gonna probably take another year

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Speaker 5: for the custody stuff, Like I wouldn't hold up your

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Speaker 5: career for this.

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Speaker 3: Well, let's say. I think the thing is is he's

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Speaker 3: like he's worried about the like you said, the custody.

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Speaker 3: So it's like if she leaves and then goes back home,

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Speaker 3: it's like where they're gonna be like, Okay, well she's

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Speaker 3: gonna go with her mom, and then he can't go

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Speaker 3: and try to fight that in California because he'll be

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Speaker 3: in a two year work commitment wherever he is right now.

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Speaker 5: Arket, Yeah, but I think they'd fight it in Arkansas.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, who knows. I don't know anything about that, but

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Speaker 3: I just think he's like, oh my God, like I

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Speaker 3: need to be able to maybe stick and move here.

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Speaker 3: But uh, let's just finish this story. For those wondering

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Speaker 3: about work, that's us. I am full time and she

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Speaker 3: works full time now as a teacher and started back

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Speaker 3: a few days ago. I had hoped she would stay

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Speaker 3: home full time to raise our daughter, since that's why

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Speaker 3: I took this job. I don't love it or enjoy it,

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Speaker 3: but it pays the bills and provides a good quality

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Speaker 3: of life. But it's what she says she needs. And

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Speaker 3: for the people messaging me about using the word trunk,

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Speaker 3: I'm from Arkansas, but there is this thing called a

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Speaker 3: plane and I have worked all over and have enjoyed

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Speaker 3: a TV show or two that wasn't Walker Texas Ranger.

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Speaker 3: I also call carts that stores trolley's, partly to mess

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Speaker 3: with people, partly because it entertains me, and mainly because

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Speaker 3: it's become a habit. Okay, strange way to end mad story.

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Speaker 5: My husband left me with our newborn so he could

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Speaker 5: party with his friend.

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Speaker 3: Oh god.

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Speaker 5: My husband thirty two male, and I thirty female, have

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Speaker 5: a three month old and the last few months have

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Speaker 5: been very challenging. Challenging on one end we have a

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Speaker 5: new baby, our first, and also because of his expectations.

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Speaker 5: By the way, this comes from Hearts and Wolfs And

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Speaker 5: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 5: the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

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Speaker 3: I'm Carly, I'm Dakota.

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Speaker 5: Before our daughter was born, he was very involved in

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Speaker 5: a niche sport, game nights with his friends, and going out.

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Speaker 5: Now he wants to get back to all of it

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Speaker 5: at once, without considering me or our daughter. This week,

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Speaker 5: he has spent a majority of his time going to

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Speaker 5: practices for his team and going out.

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Speaker 4: Well.

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Speaker 5: When we talked about things a few weeks ago, he

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Speaker 5: agreed we should share the responsibility. That was always the

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Speaker 5: plan we as we both work full time. So I

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Speaker 5: bring up the fact he's been going out without helping

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Speaker 5: me with the baby. We didn't have a daycare picked

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Speaker 5: out for when we go back to work, house needs

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Speaker 5: to be picked up, and our baby just doesn't sleep

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Speaker 5: well unless he's held. He got so mad at me

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Speaker 5: and said he feels unappreciated for what he does contribute

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Speaker 5: help with feedings, dishes, and laundry. Then he then told

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Speaker 5: me he will be leaving to go to his hometown

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Speaker 5: six hours away to clear his head. He left me

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Speaker 5: and our daughter. Now he's sending videos to me of

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Speaker 5: him and his friends going out and having fun together.

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Speaker 5: I have a meeting with my therapist soon, who says

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Speaker 5: he's emotionally harmful and to work on empowering myself. I

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Speaker 5: feel like he deserves to live the life he wants,

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Speaker 5: but not at the cost of my life too. I'm

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Speaker 5: looking for advice on how to process this. Am I

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Speaker 5: missing something? My husband genuinely doesn't see the problem here.

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Speaker 5: We have some comments can't wait. Comment one. Having children,

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Speaker 5: no matter how much you want and love them, pretty

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Speaker 5: much ends life as you know it. Hence the reason

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Speaker 5: I have none. You can build a different life as

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Speaker 5: a parent that is satisfying and wonder so I'm told.

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Speaker 5: But the one you had pre parenthood is gone. It

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Speaker 5: is asinine that he is pretending to be unaware of that,

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Speaker 5: and he is pretending this mother effort. Took a mental

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Speaker 5: health break to go home to his parents and play

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Speaker 5: with his buddies and sent you video to rub salt

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Speaker 5: in the wound. He did this immediately after you asked

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Speaker 5: for support. He was not providing. He's training you to

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Speaker 5: not ask, so stop asking and breathe fire. He is

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Speaker 5: a crap partner and worse parent. He shouldn't have done

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Speaker 5: it out a fear of repercussions. If he couldn't find

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Speaker 5: a decent human reason to not abandon his wife an infant.

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Speaker 5: I agree with other comments. Secure any assistance you can

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Speaker 5: from family or friends, find a good attorney, and file

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Speaker 5: for divorce. Follow the attorney's advice, advice regarding lock changes,

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Speaker 5: et cetera. Get all you can in settlement and child support.

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Speaker 5: You are going to need the financial support to supplement

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Speaker 5: the single parenting you will be doing. It's just a

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Speaker 5: matter of whether or not you will have him hanging

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Speaker 5: around to check out whether things are tough or not.

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Speaker 5: Imagine you and or the child with serious illness or heck,

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Speaker 5: a stomach virus. You can watch his videos while you

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Speaker 5: clean up puke. I guess I'm so pissed on your

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Speaker 5: behalf that I not only want to divorce him for you,

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Speaker 5: I want to move him in so I can use

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Speaker 5: my decades of a wifely experience to make him regret

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Speaker 5: his crappy behavior and possibly his own birth.

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Speaker 3: I like that. Com Yeah, that's a scary lady.

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Speaker 4: Is that you have no wrath?

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Speaker 5: I will provide it for you.

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Speaker 3: Don't know if, like right now is the time for divorce,

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Speaker 3: because it's like, yes, what we've seen in this post

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Speaker 3: is extremely bad, but like becoming a brand new parent

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Speaker 3: and not necessarily being red for it is something that

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Speaker 3: will make you go crazy sometimes. And it's been three months.

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Speaker 3: It's really I'm not trying to give this guy a pass.

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Speaker 3: It's really bad, but like, do you really not see

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Speaker 3: any path forward besides single parenting?

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Speaker 5: Like she's done three months without help.

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Speaker 3: It hasn't been three months.

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Speaker 5: The baby's three months old.

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Speaker 3: But he didn't leave. Wait, I'm confused.

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Speaker 5: He wasn't helping to begin with, though. The second the

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Speaker 5: baby was born, he was like, I'm going back to

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Speaker 5: my parties.

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Speaker 4: Guys.

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Speaker 3: He's exactly. He's like he's doing the reflex of like

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Speaker 3: that feels like a like a coping response, not like

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Speaker 3: a that feels like.

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Speaker 2: A no, I'm not ready.

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Speaker 3: And it's like maybe once he just like accepts it

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Speaker 3: and locks into fatherhood, it could be really good.

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Speaker 5: Is he gonna lock in after he drove six hours

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Speaker 5: away and it is taunting her?

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Speaker 3: That's not good. I'm saying, just maybe try to do

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Speaker 3: counseling or something to get this back on the rails,

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Speaker 3: because I don't feel like just jumping into sea parenting

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Speaker 3: is like a wirt. Like a lot of people say,

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Speaker 3: it's like, just divorce him and be a single mom.

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Speaker 3: It's like that's also not necessarily a huge win.

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Speaker 5: We have an update. Things took a major turn, and

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Speaker 5: now I'm considering filing for divorce in a few months.

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Speaker 5: When my husband returned from his hometown, we had a

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Speaker 5: big fight. He saw nothing wrong with leaving for a

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Speaker 5: few days to spend time with family and friends. I

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Speaker 5: told him it wasn't leaving that was the issue. It

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Speaker 5: was the abruptness and manner in what he left. Turns

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Speaker 5: out his parents are the ones who encouraged him to leave.

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Speaker 5: I called his parents to get a better understanding of

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Speaker 5: why they thought that was a good idea, especially since

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Speaker 5: I thought we were close. My mother in law calls

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Speaker 5: me often, but went radio silent while my husband was gone.

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Speaker 5: So when I finally talked to mother in law, she

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Speaker 5: says I shouldn't be so controlling and he is allowed

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Speaker 5: to have his own life. She went on to ask

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Speaker 5: why I didn't send her three month old with him,

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Speaker 5: and I scoff, why would I send my baby with

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Speaker 5: my angry, irrational husband. Basically, the parents think I'm too

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Speaker 5: controlling and their son needs to still have fun and

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Speaker 5: live his life. I never said he couldn't. After that,

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Speaker 5: whole ordeal. I remembered how grad how guarded he suddenly

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Speaker 5: became over his phone a while back, so I checked it.

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Speaker 5: I found text messages between my mother in law and

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Speaker 5: husband talking about me like I was nothing. Every little

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Speaker 5: thing I did he would report back to his mom,

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Speaker 5: making me look like a monster. I also found out

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Speaker 5: he's been recording me, turning the baby monitor on me

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Speaker 5: to watch me and baby at night, recording arguments and

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Speaker 5: disagreements too. I confronted him about the text and recordings,

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Speaker 5: and it got heated. He ended up pulling out his

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Speaker 5: phone and recording me again. In the middle of the argument,

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Speaker 5: I snapped and started wailing and screaming. I'm so embarrassed

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Speaker 5: and scared because I've never in my life experienced that

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Speaker 5: type of mental break. The worst part was he recorded

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Speaker 5: all of it. I hate him for that. She's actively

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Speaker 5: like crying and upset on the floor and he's just like, yeah,

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Speaker 5: just just you're fine recording it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah this guy, mmm, maybe divorced this guy. Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I packed up me and baby and left to my

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Speaker 5: family member's house. Thank you to everyone for the advice

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Speaker 5: on the original post. I actually listened and we'll start

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Speaker 5: moving in a different direction.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's time for divorce now.

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Speaker 5: Update two. I met with my attorney and she is

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Speaker 5: not concerned in the least bit about the video of

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Speaker 5: me having a meltdown. I live in a two party

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Speaker 5: state and did not consent to be filmed in my home,

400
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Speaker 5: so she said the video most likely would not be

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Speaker 5: allowed as an exhibit, and even if it was, she'll

402
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Speaker 5: handle it. I told her everything from the emotional lack

403
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Speaker 5: of help for the baby, him leaving us twice to

404
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Speaker 5: go out of state, and the constant devil's lettuce smoking.

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Speaker 5: Lawyer feels like I have nothing to worry about as

406
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Speaker 5: far as custody goes, but made sure I was informed

407
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Speaker 5: on his rights as well. Right now, I'm getting my

408
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,119
Speaker 5: financial affairs in order to pay her retainer, so it

409
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Speaker 5: will take a little time. Relationship wise, husband calmed down

410
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Speaker 5: a bit. He was so sweet for a few days

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Speaker 5: and then went back to trying to argue. I basically

412
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Speaker 5: just listened to him and leave the room. I refuse

413
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Speaker 5: to engage. I'm disappointed that he won't actually work with

414
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Speaker 5: me on a solution. Instead, he wants to just go

415
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Speaker 5: back to the way things were. Things will never be

416
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Speaker 5: the same bro, after you.

417
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Speaker 3: Record your partner having a full blown mental breakdown over

418
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Speaker 3: something you did to them.

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Speaker 5: With no comforting, just it's over forever.

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Speaker 3: The moment I find out you have a secret conspiracy

421
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Speaker 3: with your mom against me back, you're done.

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Speaker 5: He submits those two as evidence, and even if they

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Speaker 5: didn't get to dismissed, the judges like, why are you

424
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Speaker 5: recording your wife crying on the ground, dude, I'm like, no,

425
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Speaker 5: you don't understand. He was really she was really upset,

426
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Speaker 5: Like I was yelling at her, she was really upset.

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Speaker 3: He'd just be like, ah, you're indicted on eighteen counts

428
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Speaker 3: of stupid.

429
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Speaker 5: As far as the video footage goes, he allowed me

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Speaker 5: to delete everything from his phone and cloud storage. However,

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00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,600
Speaker 5: days later I discovered he sent the video to his

432
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Speaker 5: email as evidence. Of course I wiped everything, but there's

433
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Speaker 5: no telling if he sent it to friends or family.

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Speaker 5: I asked him if he's sure the footage has been

435
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Speaker 5: deleted from everywhere, and he assures me it has been,

436
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:26,960
Speaker 5: but I know he's lying.

437
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:29,720
Speaker 3: I was just like, at this point, let him send

438
00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:32,600
Speaker 3: that because you already live in a two party consent state.

439
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:34,480
Speaker 3: So if he sends that to a bunch of people.

440
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:38,879
Speaker 3: That's just crime. But he's committing and go ahead and

441
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:39,360
Speaker 3: let him.

442
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:41,800
Speaker 5: I get the like you're embarrassed about it, but you

443
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:45,600
Speaker 5: gotta just it's it's nothing to be embarrassed about, except

444
00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:49,000
Speaker 5: for him. He is also starting to delete text message

445
00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:52,480
Speaker 5: threads from his mom, so that adds to my distrust

446
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:56,159
Speaker 5: to the people that say there are two sides up

447
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:59,720
Speaker 5: to the story. Of course there is. However, you will

448
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:02,440
Speaker 5: never hear his side, so what's the point in even

449
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:06,000
Speaker 5: saying that. Just know that I'm holding myself accountable on

450
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 5: my actions. I got way too emotional and shouldn't have

451
00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:12,800
Speaker 5: reacted the way I did when he recorded me. I

452
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:16,400
Speaker 5: have zero reason, in my opinion, to come here and lie.

453
00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:19,679
Speaker 5: I need real help from people who can understand the

454
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:23,879
Speaker 5: situation I'm in. I came here for help on my side,

455
00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:27,399
Speaker 5: so I appreciate the people who offered help and didn't

456
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,440
Speaker 5: judge me. I was fearful he would try to take

457
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,359
Speaker 5: my child, but I'm confident that won't be an issue

458
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,600
Speaker 5: at all. There's a little bit more. But what are

459
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:36,800
Speaker 5: we thinking? We lined up again?

460
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,520
Speaker 3: Yeah? I think a good job divorcing this guy. I

461
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:42,359
Speaker 3: feel annoyed that I gave. I tried to be like, well,

462
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,679
Speaker 3: maybe let's see maybe, No, this guy sucks. Yeah, he

463
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:49,280
Speaker 3: wants to marry his mom. He's like, see how much

464
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:53,640
Speaker 3: worse she is than you? Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, he.

465
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:54,440
Speaker 5: Just married you.

466
00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:56,040
Speaker 4: Mom, we would have been fine.

467
00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:58,760
Speaker 3: Mommy, I don't like Louise. He talked to me and

468
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 3: she's like, it's okay, Sweeting's like uppies, uppies, I'm coming

469
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,480
Speaker 3: home for some uppies this weekend.

470
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 4: Rude.

471
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,480
Speaker 5: For now, I'm just keeping the peace until I can

472
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 5: get my lawyer money up. I'm still hopeful he will

473
00:23:13,520 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 5: start helping more and stop being so secretive, but we'll see.

474
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:21,199
Speaker 5: The truth is, we're having regular postpartum arguments that have

475
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:24,280
Speaker 5: been escalated by him going to his mother for counsel

476
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:29,200
Speaker 5: and recording me. I have always tolerated his overbearing mother

477
00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:31,840
Speaker 5: for the sake of keeping the peace, but when I

478
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,760
Speaker 5: finally stood up for myself and put boundaries in place,

479
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:37,480
Speaker 5: it feels like she went for the jugular during the

480
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 5: most vulnerable time in my life. It's awful. I've gone

481
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 5: full no contact with her. She's always been able to

482
00:23:45,040 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 5: see her grand baby, but I don't need to engage

483
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,399
Speaker 5: with her. My husband shouldn't have allowed her to be

484
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:55,879
Speaker 5: so involved, but he did. Now things are significantly worse again.

485
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:58,639
Speaker 5: Thank you so much to the people who offered hope

486
00:23:58,680 --> 00:23:59,640
Speaker 5: and kind words.

487
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:04,120
Speaker 3: My husband's brother yelled at him to treat me better.

488
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,119
Speaker 4: A plus brother.

489
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:09,160
Speaker 3: Though my husband and I have relationship issues, I've been

490
00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:12,439
Speaker 3: hesitant to leave him, mainly because we have a child together,

491
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:15,199
Speaker 3: but also because I care for him a lot. He

492
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 3: got really dark a few months ago, did and said

493
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:20,679
Speaker 3: a lot of things that hurt me. I was ready

494
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:23,200
Speaker 3: to leave him because throughout our relationship he never really

495
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,480
Speaker 3: treated me that great, and I think I was just

496
00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:27,520
Speaker 3: at my limit. And by the way, this comes from

497
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:29,199
Speaker 3: a deleted user, and if you want to submit your

498
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,680
Speaker 3: own stories, go to the r slash okay storytime subreddit.

499
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:34,879
Speaker 3: I'm Dakota, I'm Carly. When I tried to leave, he

500
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,720
Speaker 3: broke down and begged me to stay, so I did.

501
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:42,000
Speaker 3: He's changed since then. He's been treating me like an

502
00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:45,600
Speaker 3: equal being, going to therapy consistently for four months now,

503
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:48,560
Speaker 3: and opening up to me about things he didn't before.

504
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:52,280
Speaker 3: I've been noticing that overall he seems so much warmer

505
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:56,000
Speaker 3: to others, not just me, recently, we were driving and

506
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:59,280
Speaker 3: conversation about his little brother came up. He's twenty two,

507
00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 3: and I was telling my husband about some things his

508
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:05,240
Speaker 3: brother had told me about his girlfriend. My husband randomly

509
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,879
Speaker 3: admitted that his brother had told him to treat me better.

510
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:12,040
Speaker 3: I was shocked because I didn't think anyone noticed or

511
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 3: thought of our relationship like that. I never said a

512
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,800
Speaker 3: word to anyone. When I asked him what happened, he

513
00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:21,080
Speaker 3: seemed embarrassed and brushed it off, saying that his brother

514
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:23,720
Speaker 3: just kind of yelled at him that he doesn't treat

515
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:26,280
Speaker 3: me like a woman. The crazy thing is that my

516
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:30,880
Speaker 3: husband admitted to not treating me well too. I didn't

517
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 3: know what to say, so that was the end of

518
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:36,640
Speaker 3: the conversation. Since then, he's been bringing things up randomly,

519
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:38,960
Speaker 3: asking what I like and how I would like to

520
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,720
Speaker 3: be treated. My question is, how do I respond to this,

521
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:44,840
Speaker 3: or do I just let him do his thing. My

522
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,680
Speaker 3: usual response is to just brush it off or say

523
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 3: whatever you want, honey, But I've been growing a bit

524
00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,119
Speaker 3: of self confidence, so I don't want to brush it

525
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:57,920
Speaker 3: off anymore. I'm also just still shocked that someone said

526
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,479
Speaker 3: something to my husband. I guess I don't know what

527
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:02,960
Speaker 3: to think of it got nobody to talk about it.

528
00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:05,840
Speaker 3: Comments Comment one. Your child can pick up on this

529
00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:08,480
Speaker 3: behavior as early as three years of age. It does

530
00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:10,879
Speaker 3: not matter if it's happening in front of the child

531
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,800
Speaker 3: or not. There are a great many social cues your

532
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:18,800
Speaker 3: awful relationship dynamic is known to your child. Kids pick

533
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:21,360
Speaker 3: up on as little as a stress shift by the mother.

534
00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 3: When World War II was looming in the air, a

535
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:28,000
Speaker 3: significant increase of mothers brought their babies to their respective

536
00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:31,960
Speaker 3: doctor's offices all throughout Europe. The doctors were stunned. Then

537
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:34,960
Speaker 3: there was a connection made. The mothers were experiencing elevated

538
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 3: stress levels because they knew the imminent danger of war.

539
00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:40,680
Speaker 3: The children picked up on that and were also stressed out.

540
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:44,720
Speaker 3: If you are staying for your child, don't comment number two.

541
00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:47,400
Speaker 3: I think you should think more deeply about the fact

542
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,719
Speaker 3: that his brother has higher standards for you than you

543
00:26:49,760 --> 00:26:53,240
Speaker 3: do for yourself. As for your husband changing, thanks to therapy,

544
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:56,439
Speaker 3: people can change. So I'm not going to recommend disbelief,

545
00:26:56,680 --> 00:26:59,959
Speaker 3: but I do recommend caution. Sometimes therapy only teaches pe

546
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 3: people how to push boundaries more surreptitiously. My usual response

547
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 3: is to just brush it off or say whatever you want. Honey,

548
00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:09,879
Speaker 3: what a terrible response. Just give him a straight answer.

549
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:12,439
Speaker 3: He has always done what he wants. If he is

550
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:15,439
Speaker 3: actually changing, then think about how useless your response is

551
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:17,680
Speaker 3: to him. He has realized in the last four months

552
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:19,840
Speaker 3: that when he does what he wants, he is a

553
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:22,199
Speaker 3: bad partner to you. He now has to make up

554
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,399
Speaker 3: for all the time he spent not caring about your needs.

555
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:27,200
Speaker 3: The best way to figure out what someone wants is observation,

556
00:27:27,280 --> 00:27:30,440
Speaker 3: but observation takes time. The next best and quickest way

557
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 3: is to ask he asks you what your needs are,

558
00:27:33,560 --> 00:27:36,120
Speaker 3: and you tell him nothing, and if he isn't changing,

559
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:38,960
Speaker 3: just playing along, then you're just making it easier for

560
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,640
Speaker 3: him to pretend that he is trying. And there's an update.

561
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,200
Speaker 3: I think it's what the seven month mark is when

562
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 3: it's like, all right, that's like a cemented behavior. It

563
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,199
Speaker 3: goes like it goes in seven It's like seven weeks

564
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:52,000
Speaker 3: is like how long to break a habit, and seven

565
00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:55,320
Speaker 3: months is like how long to like solidify it into

566
00:27:55,359 --> 00:27:56,679
Speaker 3: your programming?

567
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,080
Speaker 5: Yeah for a new behavior? Yeah yeah, yeah. I thought

568
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:01,280
Speaker 5: you were saying, like, because everyone says like three months

569
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:03,240
Speaker 5: to find out who like they really are as a person.

570
00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:05,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I think it is. It's three months is

571
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:08,960
Speaker 3: how long someone can theoretically hide be a different person.

572
00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 3: He's already passed that threshold, so he's probably trying to

573
00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:12,359
Speaker 3: change for real.

574
00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:15,000
Speaker 5: Dude, you remember how old these people are to.

575
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:15,399
Speaker 4: Me have that.

576
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:16,879
Speaker 3: I don't think we did at the beginning.

577
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:19,000
Speaker 5: I didn't think so, but I know little brother's twenty two.

578
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 3: It's really hard. Clearly this is someone who is in

579
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 3: this relationship for a long time and kind of let

580
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:26,159
Speaker 3: go of the stuff that they wanted or what they needed.

581
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:28,200
Speaker 3: So I think that commenter might have been a little

582
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 3: harsh to be like what a terrible response. It's like

583
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:31,480
Speaker 3: that might just be the only response they know how

584
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 3: to give.

585
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:33,160
Speaker 4: I mean, I.

586
00:28:33,080 --> 00:28:35,880
Speaker 5: Think it's good to have that semi wake up call

587
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 5: of like, hey, dude, like get better standards for yourself,

588
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:42,240
Speaker 5: Like why is the brother holding you to Like almost

589
00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:44,200
Speaker 5: like I don't think she needed it. I think she

590
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:47,280
Speaker 5: knew she wasn't being treated well, but that kind of

591
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:49,720
Speaker 5: like dude, like tell him what you want, Like this

592
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:52,200
Speaker 5: is your chance, like take it, like do everything that

593
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:55,160
Speaker 5: you can to like if you want to keep this relationship.

594
00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,520
Speaker 5: This is your time to keep this relationship, or at

595
00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 5: least try to.

596
00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 3: You gotta lock in and figure out what you want.

597
00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:01,560
Speaker 2: Update.

598
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 3: So I left him. Ah, everyone was right about him.

599
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 3: I'm safe with my daughter and my little brother. It's

600
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,960
Speaker 3: been a few weeks since I left. Even after I

601
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,800
Speaker 3: posted last time, I won't lie, I still had hope

602
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 3: for this man. What made me decide to leave was

603
00:29:16,280 --> 00:29:19,200
Speaker 3: the fact that, despite him verbally me and later threatening

604
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 3: to fix me, he acted like I was the one

605
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:24,360
Speaker 3: who needed to bend over backwhards and apologize to him.

606
00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 3: It wasn't that he treated me badly that was the

607
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:28,560
Speaker 3: final reason I left. It was the fact that he

608
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 3: was stomping around and acting like a child, yelling at

609
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 3: me and my daughter and making her feel anxious. I

610
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,880
Speaker 3: still tried to be nice. I tried to talk to him.

611
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 3: I asked him what was wrong, and he just gave

612
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 3: me that look he always does. I don't know how

613
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:42,680
Speaker 3: to explain it, but it makes me feel so small.

614
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 3: He doesn't break his gaze or say anything. He just

615
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:47,640
Speaker 3: stares until I have to look away. It felt like

616
00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:50,280
Speaker 3: a switch flipped in me, and Okay, let's let's let

617
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:52,880
Speaker 3: me just take it back b yeah, bit bit uh b.

618
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:55,120
Speaker 3: But but he just stares until I have to look away.

619
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 3: It felt like a switch flipped in me, and mentally

620
00:29:57,880 --> 00:30:00,680
Speaker 3: I was gone that night. I put my urgency planned

621
00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:03,440
Speaker 3: in place, because I already had one from a time

622
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:06,040
Speaker 3: he threatened me months ago. A few days later, I

623
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:08,440
Speaker 3: was physically gone while he was at work. I'm not

624
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 3: going to give details because of the possibility he can

625
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 3: see this. But I have a new job, new apartment

626
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:16,920
Speaker 3: in a new city, however, and wherever I want. It's

627
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,560
Speaker 3: so freeing. My daughter couldn't care less, and somehow that

628
00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:23,480
Speaker 3: makes me happy, but also deeply sad. I should have

629
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 3: done this a month ago, six months ago, a year ago.

630
00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:28,160
Speaker 3: She's just happy that she gets to go to a

631
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 3: park more often now with her uncle. My brother confided

632
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 3: that he's happy he doesn't have to hear him yell anymore.

633
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 3: My family keeps calling me. My mom's telling me I'm

634
00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:38,320
Speaker 3: making a big mistake and embarrassing myself.

635
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:39,320
Speaker 4: Cry about it.

636
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:39,600
Speaker 5: Mom.

637
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 3: Does mom know everything? If mom knows everything and is

638
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 3: still saying that, no contact with mom. If she knows

639
00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 3: what you went through or we're going through, and she's

640
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 3: still saying that so bye bye, goodbye, not talking to you.

641
00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,640
Speaker 3: I'm not even going to bother explaining myself or my

642
00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 3: side of the story. His family keeps calling me too.

643
00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,760
Speaker 3: His mother is apparently in the hospital because of a

644
00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:02,600
Speaker 3: st induced attack from this. My sisters in law sent

645
00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:05,200
Speaker 3: me nasty texts and called me until I blocked them.

646
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:08,200
Speaker 3: My ex keeps calling me too. I hate it makes

647
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 3: me feel sick to my stomach. My brother in law

648
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:12,880
Speaker 3: only sent me one text and it says, good for you.

649
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,880
Speaker 3: I hope you find a better life. That makes me

650
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 3: feel somewhat comforted with this whole situation. And I hope

651
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,240
Speaker 3: he's alright. There's a little bit more story.

652
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,480
Speaker 5: Like, yeah, good for you, girl, you got out.

653
00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:26,120
Speaker 4: I get that.

654
00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:28,880
Speaker 5: Sometimes it takes a minute to like fully realize the

655
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:33,040
Speaker 5: situation that you're in. And once once reality slapped you

656
00:31:33,080 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 5: in the face a little bit more, hopefully not actually

657
00:31:36,280 --> 00:31:39,000
Speaker 5: can I say that? I don't know that's reality through

658
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 5: cold water in your face a little bit more. U.

659
00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 3: Once reality gave you the people's elbow.

660
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:51,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, take out my other one. I thinky's gonna yell

661
00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 5: at me and shitting to monetize.

662
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,560
Speaker 3: You're just too much of a pistol. I feel like

663
00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:57,160
Speaker 3: I gottamonetize yesterday.

664
00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:59,360
Speaker 5: I didn't, actually, I just said something. He's like, are

665
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:01,240
Speaker 5: you trying to He was kidding.

666
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:04,480
Speaker 2: Joel, No, we did. We were.

667
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:07,920
Speaker 3: We were on the tic tac Oh. It was the

668
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:12,240
Speaker 3: Tictac Patiyak yesterday. This story, I think maybe I don't know.

669
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:14,360
Speaker 3: I feel like I might have anyway. Yeah, it's crazy.

670
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:17,840
Speaker 3: Document everything that these people are saying to you so

671
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 3: that if this ahole tries to like do custody battle

672
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:24,360
Speaker 3: or something, then you can just be like, hello, mister

673
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 3: or missus judge. Look. So that's my update. This will

674
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 3: be my last time posting on here. I am completely

675
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 3: done with relationships and we'll probably never get into one again.

676
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:39,120
Speaker 3: But thanks to you everyone who took time to comment

677
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:41,960
Speaker 3: and message me. I seriously feel like each one slowly

678
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:45,360
Speaker 3: built my confidence bit by bit. I know I'm a

679
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 3: bad person for not doing it on my own no,

680
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 3: so I thank all of you sincerely for helping me.

681
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:53,840
Speaker 3: I owe everyone my new life. I wasn't going to

682
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:55,680
Speaker 3: post it first, but it feels nice to get this

683
00:32:55,760 --> 00:32:57,840
Speaker 3: all off my chest. I feel like I'm going to

684
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:01,480
Speaker 3: explode with pent up emotions and there are some more

685
00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:05,040
Speaker 3: comments here. Number one, I call BS on his mom

686
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,040
Speaker 3: in the hospital because of the stress. If it isn't

687
00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:09,720
Speaker 3: a lie, then that kind of over dramatic reaction is

688
00:33:09,800 --> 00:33:13,360
Speaker 3: reason enough to GTFO proud of you. I hope he

689
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 3: says no. She actually has been at the hospital very

690
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:19,520
Speaker 3: frequently because of dress. Her husband is the original. My

691
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:23,320
Speaker 3: husband acts exactly like his father, except his father is worse.

692
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:26,400
Speaker 3: She works, does all of the parenting in housework while

693
00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:29,680
Speaker 3: her husband and all the kids watch TV and play games.

694
00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:32,200
Speaker 3: Nobody ever tries to help her, and so she ends

695
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 3: up in the hospital from exhaustion and stress. I feel

696
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:37,800
Speaker 3: bad for her because I already know my ex probably

697
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:40,520
Speaker 3: ran back to her crying, But I also don't feel

698
00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 3: bad for it because she also left me nasty messages

699
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,000
Speaker 3: that I ruined him and his life.

700
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 2: So whatever.

701
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:49,000
Speaker 3: Well, man two, I know that you don't want to

702
00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:51,280
Speaker 3: bother explaining yourself, but I think you might feel better

703
00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:53,760
Speaker 3: if you send a certain email explaining the situation to

704
00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:56,840
Speaker 3: the people bothering you, like your mom. I'm not saying

705
00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 3: you have to engage in a conversation after that. You

706
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:02,000
Speaker 3: can even the after sending the email if you want.

707
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:05,480
Speaker 3: Maybe it won't have any effect, but I think later

708
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 3: on in life you can feel good that you didn't

709
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,880
Speaker 3: allow him to have complete control of the narrative. If

710
00:34:10,920 --> 00:34:13,720
Speaker 3: people don't believe you, that's on them. You will also

711
00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,319
Speaker 3: know that they have no excuse if they treat you

712
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:17,040
Speaker 3: badly later.

713
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories.

714
00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:21,240
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes bads from our sponsors.

715
00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:25,080
Speaker 4: My sister accused me of stealing her dream guy, but

716
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:26,719
Speaker 4: nobody even knows.

717
00:34:27,160 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 3: Maybe she's still in her dream.

718
00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:31,359
Speaker 4: Okay, so this is what's going on in my oh

719
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 4: so lovely life. I twenty four female recently started dating

720
00:34:35,560 --> 00:34:39,840
Speaker 4: my childhood friend Mark twenty six mail. Congrats, that's exciting.

721
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 4: We've been dating for about four months now, but only

722
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:46,480
Speaker 4: recently told her families about our relationship. Oh so cute.

723
00:34:47,120 --> 00:34:50,280
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Puzzled Within. Sorry Puzzled

724
00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,160
Speaker 4: Win thirty twenty and if you would to spend your

725
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 4: own stories, go to the r slash Okay, storytime, separate it.

726
00:34:54,880 --> 00:34:56,759
Speaker 3: I'm Sophia, I'm Riley.

727
00:34:56,440 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 5: And Keon Oh wow, thanks more.

728
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:02,719
Speaker 4: I've been upstairs with Angie and whenever I like we're

729
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 4: doing that.

730
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:04,440
Speaker 3: It's just one to go.

731
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 4: I see here and a valued member of.

732
00:35:09,040 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 2: That, I can leave than you.

733
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 3: Please don't lave a kid.

734
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:14,320
Speaker 2: I can leave right.

735
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:18,439
Speaker 4: Now and oh p says Amy, Mark's mother and my mom.

736
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:22,160
Speaker 4: We're also childhood friends and have remained very close Due

737
00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:24,960
Speaker 4: to their close friendship, Me and my siblings also became

738
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:27,960
Speaker 4: close to Mark and his twin sister when we moved

739
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 4: close to them when I was eight. My sister, Mia,

740
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:34,320
Speaker 4: twenty six female, was also close to Jess, Mark's twin sister.

741
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:36,839
Speaker 4: Growing up. They ended up having a lot more in

742
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:39,840
Speaker 4: common while me and Mark bonded over our shared passion

743
00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 4: for Mario Kart and books. Not to brag, but I'm

744
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:46,279
Speaker 4: better than he is at Rainbow Road. When he got

745
00:35:46,280 --> 00:35:48,359
Speaker 4: to high school, things did change a bit and we

746
00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 4: weren't constantly hanging out with each other since we were

747
00:35:50,920 --> 00:35:53,240
Speaker 4: in different schools. But we still went to see movies

748
00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 4: occasionally or if the fair was in town. I join

749
00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:59,000
Speaker 4: him and his high school friends Mia and Jess would

750
00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:01,799
Speaker 4: sometimes join us, but they weren't all that interested in

751
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:04,040
Speaker 4: most of the things we did, like a few times

752
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,760
Speaker 4: we went camping. Both of them went with us once

753
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 4: and never joined us again, deciding it wasn't for them,

754
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:14,240
Speaker 4: which perfectly fine. Camping isn't for everyone. When Mark turn eighteen,

755
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,840
Speaker 4: he decided he wanted to join the Coast Guard. We wrote, called,

756
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:21,680
Speaker 4: and messaged each other constantly while he was serving. He

757
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:24,440
Speaker 4: just finished his eight year contract and is thinking about

758
00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:27,520
Speaker 4: going another four years. Wow. When he came home, he

759
00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:29,759
Speaker 4: invited me to check out a new bakery that his

760
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:32,400
Speaker 4: mom mentioned to him. I have a huge sweet tooth

761
00:36:32,440 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 4: and couldn't say no to spending time with him or

762
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:38,680
Speaker 4: missed the chance to stuff my face with pastries, So

763
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:42,000
Speaker 4: of course I said yes. As I'm stuffing my face

764
00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:44,520
Speaker 4: with said pastries, he blurts out that he likes me

765
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:46,320
Speaker 4: and wants to know if I was interested in a

766
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 4: relationship with him. I like you. Yeah, that feels like

767
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:54,960
Speaker 4: an anime moment. I said yes after choking on my

768
00:36:55,040 --> 00:37:04,919
Speaker 4: pastry and him apologized exactly, Yeah, for sure, I would

769
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:06,719
Speaker 4: love that. I said.

770
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:11,520
Speaker 3: What, Oh, sorry, Sorry, you were reacting.

771
00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:12,200
Speaker 4: I thought.

772
00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:15,880
Speaker 6: You were like, this is how I would like to

773
00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:18,840
Speaker 6: be asked.

774
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:21,759
Speaker 4: I was just being ope, Okay, I understand I was

775
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:24,440
Speaker 4: reenacting the scene. I don't want to be asked out

776
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 4: while I'm choking down pastries. Wait until laughter, sorry.

777
00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:30,920
Speaker 2: Before I don't know.

778
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:33,160
Speaker 4: Or before yeah, and then I get the pastries as

779
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 4: a treat. I said yes after choking down choking on

780
00:37:37,680 --> 00:37:40,239
Speaker 4: my pastry and him apologizing for not waiting for me

781
00:37:40,320 --> 00:37:45,200
Speaker 4: to swallow first. Lol. Anyways, here's where things get interesting.

782
00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:48,720
Speaker 4: Amy had invited me and my family for a Sunday

783
00:37:48,719 --> 00:37:51,640
Speaker 4: dinner at her house, and me and Mark both decided

784
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 4: that it was the perfect time to announce our relationship

785
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:57,240
Speaker 4: to our families since everyone would be in one place.

786
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:00,640
Speaker 4: We did it after everyone was done eating but still

787
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:03,319
Speaker 4: sitting at the table talking. My mom and Amy were

788
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:06,720
Speaker 4: thrilled by the news. Amy gave me a big hug

789
00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:09,320
Speaker 4: and asked when it started, before saying she was happy

790
00:38:09,320 --> 00:38:12,400
Speaker 4: for us. Later on, Mia corded me in the kitchen.

791
00:38:12,880 --> 00:38:15,600
Speaker 4: When I went to get a drink, she started berating

792
00:38:15,640 --> 00:38:19,279
Speaker 4: me for taking the guy she liked. I was incredibly

793
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 4: confused because she never mentioned liking anyone to me, let

794
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 4: alone Mark. I didn't even know she had talked to him.

795
00:38:25,960 --> 00:38:28,279
Speaker 4: I told her this, but she was adamant that I

796
00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 4: knew and I did it on purpose. We ended up

797
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:34,720
Speaker 4: getting into a heated argument and she stormed out. After

798
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:37,960
Speaker 4: she stormed out, my mom asked what happened, and when

799
00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 4: I told her, she asked if I knew me I

800
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:42,640
Speaker 4: liked Mark. I said no, and my mom didn't either.

801
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:46,120
Speaker 4: I asked Jess if she knew since she's MEA's best friend,

802
00:38:46,160 --> 00:38:48,880
Speaker 4: and Jess said she had no clue. And Mark was

803
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 4: confused because he hasn't really talked to her since he

804
00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:53,239
Speaker 4: left for the Coast Guard. He said she sends him

805
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:56,200
Speaker 4: holiday texts like Happy New Year's and Christmas, but that's it.

806
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 4: Mia is now refusing to talk to me, and a

807
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:01,520
Speaker 4: few of our mutual friends say that I'm an a

808
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 4: hole for not knowing when I'm her sister. She's not

809
00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 4: a mind reader. You can't expect oh P to know

810
00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 4: what her sister hasn't said.

811
00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, agreed, Now, it would be different if every sleepover

812
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:20,920
Speaker 6: you guys would like have fantasies about and I love Mark.

813
00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 3: And then Mark came and gave me a flower and

814
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:26,640
Speaker 3: put it behind my ear. You guys didn't do that.

815
00:39:26,880 --> 00:39:29,520
Speaker 4: Whole different story. I don't think I'm the a hole,

816
00:39:29,560 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 4: but now I'm just wondering if I might be. So

817
00:39:32,880 --> 00:39:33,759
Speaker 4: Am I the a hole?

818
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:36,960
Speaker 2: Shooters got to shoot? So say, did she have DIBs.

819
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:39,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, did she say Dibbs, then you're good.

820
00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:40,879
Speaker 2: Dibbs is a real thing.

821
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 6: I did called Dibbs the Nini saul Angie to who himself?

822
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:46,520
Speaker 2: You know who?

823
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:47,680
Speaker 3: Who was not there?

824
00:39:47,680 --> 00:39:48,680
Speaker 2: Who was wing manning me?

825
00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 4: Why would you have was that?

826
00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:51,000
Speaker 5: After?

827
00:39:51,719 --> 00:39:53,600
Speaker 4: No? But during.

828
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:58,239
Speaker 3: I wouldn't tis mentally I did?

829
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:00,160
Speaker 6: Sorry?

830
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:02,720
Speaker 4: Why would you know about to call DIBs at that point? Weird?

831
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:07,400
Speaker 4: Commenter one, I haven't read your post. The details aren't important.

832
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:10,799
Speaker 4: You didn't steal the guy from your sister. He liked you,

833
00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:14,560
Speaker 4: not her. He was never hers for you to steal.

834
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:18,440
Speaker 4: Commentator two, not the a hole. She didn't call Dibbs.

835
00:40:19,040 --> 00:40:21,840
Speaker 4: Whoa she didn't call.

836
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:23,239
Speaker 2: Dig brought up?

837
00:40:23,239 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 4: That's amazing, and she had over a decade to do so,

838
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:28,800
Speaker 4: even if she wasn't going to make a move herself

839
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:29,160
Speaker 4: on him.

840
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:29,879
Speaker 5: Now.

841
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:32,719
Speaker 4: Whether or not Dibbs is valid is another discussion. But

842
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:35,480
Speaker 4: you have to at least indicate interest or house anyone

843
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:39,440
Speaker 4: to know. Commenter three says, not the a hole. Sis

844
00:40:39,480 --> 00:40:41,920
Speaker 4: never made her interest known, and your relationship was grown

845
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:45,360
Speaker 4: with him while she never bothered to start one. Commoner

846
00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:48,520
Speaker 4: four says, if your sister has said that she liked him,

847
00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:51,319
Speaker 4: then it would give her cause to be salty about it.

848
00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:53,640
Speaker 4: She didn't say anything. You and Mike have had a

849
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:57,400
Speaker 4: close friendship for many years, which didn't include either of

850
00:40:57,440 --> 00:40:59,800
Speaker 4: your sisters, and it was kind of a natural progression,

851
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:01,399
Speaker 4: not the a hole real quick.

852
00:41:01,640 --> 00:41:04,040
Speaker 6: Gen Thompson says, Yes, DIBs is real. My hubby and

853
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:06,520
Speaker 6: I called DIBs on each other and then came together

854
00:41:07,120 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 6: after we grew up.

855
00:41:08,360 --> 00:41:12,840
Speaker 4: Yeah. I've never had to dibbs anyone because my friends

856
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:15,839
Speaker 4: and I don't have the same taste. Except once at

857
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:19,399
Speaker 4: a party, my friend and I got the same guy

858
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:24,000
Speaker 4: was cute and we're like, we're I was like yeah, yeah,

859
00:41:24,040 --> 00:41:26,719
Speaker 4: and I was, and we were both like trying to,

860
00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:28,879
Speaker 4: you know, figure out how to talk to him. Neither

861
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:30,640
Speaker 4: of us ended up talking to him. She talked to

862
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:34,759
Speaker 4: him later in the night and then much late. I

863
00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:36,759
Speaker 4: never talked to him much later. He was like saying

864
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,279
Speaker 4: goodbye to this girl and he was so boring. I

865
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:40,400
Speaker 4: was like, Oh, they got.

866
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,319
Speaker 2: It, and we talked to that guy. Yeah, she does

867
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:45,920
Speaker 2: not like boring. Have you guys ever been called like

868
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:48,320
Speaker 2: a Dibink.

869
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:49,759
Speaker 3: Said, I've ever been called Oh, hear me out, hear

870
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:49,960
Speaker 3: me out.

871
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:53,279
Speaker 6: Okay, my birthday night when I turned twenty three, this

872
00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:56,040
Speaker 6: my friend was with me and it was my birthday

873
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:58,200
Speaker 6: and we were shooting pool and this girl calls He

874
00:41:58,239 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 6: calls DIBs on this girl. Well, that girl starts chatting

875
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:06,960
Speaker 6: with me, and then I was like, man, I'm gonna

876
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:09,440
Speaker 6: have to go for it, and he's all right, yeah.

877
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:10,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, but then you, yeah, you have a conversation. I

878
00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:12,920
Speaker 4: don't think I've ever He was like, you know, if

879
00:42:12,960 --> 00:42:15,359
Speaker 4: anyone's ever called DIBs on me, presumably not.

880
00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:15,960
Speaker 5: I don't know.

881
00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:18,239
Speaker 6: I mean I have I called DIBs on Angie. I'm

882
00:42:18,239 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 6: gonna have DIBs on her.

883
00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:20,759
Speaker 4: What does that have to do with it?

884
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:23,960
Speaker 2: I've been, I've been, he has DIBs on Carly.

885
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:25,600
Speaker 4: That's different.

886
00:42:26,239 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 2: I didn't tell anyone. Yeah, well, I mean like it's

887
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:32,279
Speaker 2: kind of a no. That was That was she kind

888
00:42:32,280 --> 00:42:35,440
Speaker 2: of honestly, she was in shocked that I called DIBs

889
00:42:35,440 --> 00:42:37,919
Speaker 2: on her. Oh wow, you are pretty hot? Thank you?

890
00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:38,359
Speaker 3: So are you?

891
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:43,880
Speaker 4: Yeah? Well anyway, update, Oh my god, I might just

892
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:51,040
Speaker 4: strangle my sister if it was legal. I definitely would.

893
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:55,719
Speaker 4: Whoa Okay, oh pe com My mom just called me

894
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 4: sobbing about how Mia is now refusing to talk to

895
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:01,760
Speaker 4: her or her stepfather, and is also no longer coming

896
00:43:01,760 --> 00:43:05,640
Speaker 4: to our younger brother's birthday party because she feels betrayed

897
00:43:05,680 --> 00:43:08,600
Speaker 4: that they're siding with me. I'm incredibly pissed off at

898
00:43:08,600 --> 00:43:11,040
Speaker 4: her at the moment. But here's what my mother said happened.

899
00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 4: Mia had called to ask about her younger brother, Mike's

900
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:17,960
Speaker 4: birthday party next weekend. He's turning eleven and is super

901
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:20,960
Speaker 4: excited for his birthday party because my parents and I

902
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,200
Speaker 4: told him if he got at least to be average

903
00:43:23,239 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 4: for a whole year, we'd take him and five of

904
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:29,239
Speaker 4: his closest friends to David Buster's for his birthday. We

905
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:35,000
Speaker 4: gotta go back. That was so fun. I'm only been once,

906
00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:37,560
Speaker 4: but we went last year and Riley and I went

907
00:43:37,760 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 4: hard on the dance Revolution. I'm so I'm moderately good

908
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:48,160
Speaker 4: at that. Needless to say, he kept his end of

909
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 4: the deal, so we're keeping our end. Apparently Mia was

910
00:43:51,200 --> 00:43:53,120
Speaker 4: wondering if me and Mark would be there as well,

911
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:56,080
Speaker 4: which is a stupid question. Seems I'm helping to pay

912
00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:59,759
Speaker 4: for it in Mike Adore's Mark. Yes, she already knows this.

913
00:44:00,040 --> 00:44:02,839
Speaker 4: Our mom said, yes, of course we'd be there. Mia

914
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,240
Speaker 4: then began pleading with her to ask me to stay

915
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:08,600
Speaker 4: home because she didn't feel comfortable being around me because

916
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:12,399
Speaker 4: she still felt betrayed or whatever. Oh my gosh, there

917
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:13,920
Speaker 4: is a little bit left to the story.

918
00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:17,359
Speaker 3: Thought sort of sibling kind of thing.

919
00:44:17,640 --> 00:44:19,839
Speaker 4: She's gonna get Oh, she better get over it. I'd

920
00:44:19,880 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 4: be like, girl, I literally would just say, like, get

921
00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:22,200
Speaker 4: over it.

922
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 2: How old is his sister Againna?

923
00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:26,000
Speaker 4: She they're in their mid twenties. An, they're both in

924
00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 4: their mid twenties.

925
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:28,319
Speaker 3: Are you sure she's not eighteen or six?

926
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:30,919
Speaker 4: She sounds it, she sounds it.

927
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:33,279
Speaker 6: It just sounds like, Okay, here is here. You had

928
00:44:33,320 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 6: your childhood crush that you've had your now heartbroken inside,

929
00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:38,799
Speaker 6: and that's kind of how you're acting is because like

930
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:40,440
Speaker 6: that's whenever you found them and you're like, I don't

931
00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:40,680
Speaker 6: know what.

932
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, you revert back to when you the age that

933
00:44:45,280 --> 00:44:47,080
Speaker 4: you had a crush on them, because like, if you had.

934
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:48,960
Speaker 6: A crush if OPI, you had a crush on him

935
00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:50,760
Speaker 6: and you had all these feelings and stuff, your.

936
00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:52,400
Speaker 2: Sister probably did too because.

937
00:44:52,200 --> 00:44:54,799
Speaker 6: You guys were around each other, and it makes sense

938
00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:56,000
Speaker 6: she's probably felt that way.

939
00:44:56,040 --> 00:44:58,320
Speaker 2: Towards him. Nah, double down, going.

940
00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:01,920
Speaker 4: Like yeah, like loser. I got a.

941
00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:06,200
Speaker 6: Meaning, dude, there was you seen the Materialist?

942
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:10,279
Speaker 3: No, I refuse to Is it materialist or the materialist?

943
00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:11,280
Speaker 4: Out of principle?

944
00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:14,400
Speaker 6: What do you mean with the Pedro and I love Petro?

945
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 5: Yeah?

946
00:45:14,960 --> 00:45:15,120
Speaker 3: Wait?

947
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:16,000
Speaker 2: But why apparently?

948
00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:19,800
Speaker 3: Is it like I have I don't like other there's.

949
00:45:19,680 --> 00:45:21,919
Speaker 2: One person in that movie that I love Petro, though

950
00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:25,800
Speaker 2: she also likes Christ. What you don't like Dakota?

951
00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:28,600
Speaker 4: I did not say that. I said nothing.

952
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 3: Was it because of the Spider Woman movie?

953
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 4: I've said nothing? She doesn't like I is this a

954
00:45:34,160 --> 00:45:35,799
Speaker 4: political thing? This is a political thing?

955
00:45:35,880 --> 00:45:36,600
Speaker 2: Okay.

956
00:45:36,840 --> 00:45:38,880
Speaker 6: Anyways, in the movie, since you're not gonna.

957
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:40,160
Speaker 2: Watch it, no't toilet, I want to watch you?

958
00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 3: What he come saying? Oh my god, it was early.

959
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:44,280
Speaker 2: In the movie.

960
00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:47,840
Speaker 3: Sorry, WHOA.

961
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:51,560
Speaker 6: One of the reason why this one woman didn't want

962
00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:54,799
Speaker 6: to marry her husband is because she was like, my

963
00:45:54,880 --> 00:45:58,360
Speaker 6: sister would be so jealous because he's way more attractive

964
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 6: than her husband and he makes more money and I know,

965
00:46:02,680 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 6: I know, And I was like.

966
00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:05,960
Speaker 3: That's probably like a real that's definitely like one of

967
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:06,800
Speaker 3: the stories we've read.

968
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:07,920
Speaker 4: That's so annoying.

969
00:46:08,080 --> 00:46:11,160
Speaker 6: I was like, okay, but this is what Opie's been

970
00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:13,560
Speaker 6: doing with ah. My sister's gonna be so jealous because

971
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:14,400
Speaker 6: I have a hot husband.

972
00:46:14,840 --> 00:46:18,239
Speaker 4: AnyWho. Our mom said no, she wouldn't be asking me

973
00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:20,919
Speaker 4: to stay home because not only did I help pay

974
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,759
Speaker 4: for the party, but this is Mike's party and he

975
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:27,200
Speaker 4: wanted both of us there. Mia that apparently begins screaming

976
00:46:27,239 --> 00:46:31,240
Speaker 4: at her over the phone for choosing me over even

977
00:46:31,320 --> 00:46:36,040
Speaker 4: though I heard her and that she felt betrayed cry

978
00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 4: about it. Our stepfather tried to intervene because our mother

979
00:46:39,640 --> 00:46:43,319
Speaker 4: had started crying, but Mia just began screaming at him,

980
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,920
Speaker 4: before saying she was no longer coming to the party

981
00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:49,000
Speaker 4: and hanging up. Mia is now refusing to answer either

982
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:51,640
Speaker 4: of them. So am I the a hole common one?

983
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:54,200
Speaker 4: This is a whole twenty six year old adult throwing

984
00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:59,000
Speaker 4: a tantrum. Just remind her reply I'm envisioning teenager saying

985
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:01,880
Speaker 4: to the bathroom mirror, Oh, I'm gee, he's so dreamy

986
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:05,520
Speaker 4: and I love him, and I'm Colin dibbed right here

987
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:08,800
Speaker 4: and then spending a decade collecting hair for a build

988
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:11,240
Speaker 4: of Mark and somehow thinking that counts.

989
00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:12,400
Speaker 6: Oh.

990
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 4: Another reply says, since nobody noticed her crash. She rarely

991
00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:18,160
Speaker 4: communicated with him, and she never spoke about it to anyone.

992
00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:21,520
Speaker 4: I'm having serious doubts she really was that in love

993
00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:24,000
Speaker 4: with him. I'm wondering more if she's the type to

994
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:26,919
Speaker 4: think that all guys should pick her first. I've known

995
00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:29,480
Speaker 4: people like that, and they tend to be really delusional

996
00:47:29,520 --> 00:47:32,080
Speaker 4: in their belief that everyone should be like them or

997
00:47:32,120 --> 00:47:35,319
Speaker 4: should like them, along with becoming jealous and trying to

998
00:47:35,360 --> 00:47:38,560
Speaker 4: sabotage their friends for dating. But it sounds like everyone

999
00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:41,160
Speaker 4: is just totally gobsmacked by the way she's acting. So

1000
00:47:41,200 --> 00:47:44,200
Speaker 4: it's hard to tell. And yeah, these are just kind

1001
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:45,120
Speaker 4: of about that.

1002
00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:47,959
Speaker 6: I would love to see a picture of Mark because

1003
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,279
Speaker 6: there might be a fine this guy. There might be

1004
00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:53,759
Speaker 6: a fine fellow out there to have this kind of.

1005
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:58,239
Speaker 4: He might be super fine. Ye, But I don't know.

1006
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:02,400
Speaker 4: I think that she's being a little drama queen. Oh yeah,

1007
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:04,560
Speaker 4: and uh you pirana mind.

1008
00:48:04,840 --> 00:48:06,880
Speaker 2: She's just a little upsetty spaghetti that she was.

1009
00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:11,480
Speaker 3: Come on, come on, you got the rose, you got

1010
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:11,960
Speaker 3: the rose.

1011
00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 2: John Here, We're gonna get back to this juicy story.

1012
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 3: But a quick three minute break of ads from our sponsors.

1013
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:21,239
Speaker 6: My sister had an affair with my ex. I'll never

1014
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:22,080
Speaker 6: trust her again.

1015
00:48:22,160 --> 00:48:23,759
Speaker 4: See now this is betrayal.

1016
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:26,880
Speaker 6: Fourteen years ago, when I was in my early thirties,

1017
00:48:27,000 --> 00:48:29,680
Speaker 6: I did it a guy we'll call Rod for around

1018
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:30,920
Speaker 6: six or seven months.

1019
00:48:30,960 --> 00:48:32,440
Speaker 4: Why are we calling him Rod?

1020
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:36,200
Speaker 2: Maybe he's got not never mind long Rod.

1021
00:48:36,520 --> 00:48:39,920
Speaker 6: After only two months, he started visiting my parents and

1022
00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:43,400
Speaker 6: sister on his way from way home from work, claiming

1023
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:44,520
Speaker 6: he wanted.

1024
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:46,640
Speaker 3: To get to know my parents. After two months.

1025
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:49,719
Speaker 6: During this time, my sister we'll call her Sherry, was

1026
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:52,840
Speaker 6: going through a rough patch and making questionable choices with

1027
00:48:52,920 --> 00:48:56,160
Speaker 6: men and substances. By the way, this comes from gasted

1028
00:48:56,280 --> 00:48:59,920
Speaker 6: flabbers sixty six on the r slash Charlotte Dobray you

1029
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:02,320
Speaker 6: tube subreddit and if you want to see your own stories,

1030
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,719
Speaker 6: what are the Okay storytime Subreddit.

1031
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 3: I'm Riley, I'm Sophia, and I'm Keon and Op says.

1032
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,480
Speaker 6: When I was dating Rod, I asked if he knew

1033
00:49:12,600 --> 00:49:15,960
Speaker 6: any way I could help her as she was falling

1034
00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:19,319
Speaker 6: into a dangerous situation. He was a police officer at

1035
00:49:19,360 --> 00:49:22,560
Speaker 6: the time, so I hope he knows something that might help.

1036
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:25,480
Speaker 6: He wasn't overly helpful and said I was being too

1037
00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:30,120
Speaker 6: judgmental of her choices, but then she got deeper into trouble.

1038
00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:33,200
Speaker 6: I reached out to her, saying I was there if

1039
00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:36,560
Speaker 6: she needed to talk. Around this time, Rod was visiting

1040
00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:39,920
Speaker 6: her every day after work. I informed Rod of my

1041
00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:43,200
Speaker 6: concerns about her situation and told him I was really

1042
00:49:43,239 --> 00:49:47,279
Speaker 6: worried about her because she had changed dramatically overnight. He

1043
00:49:47,400 --> 00:49:50,200
Speaker 6: yelled at me, saying that I obviously hated my sister

1044
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:52,359
Speaker 6: and shut up about talking to her.

1045
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:56,120
Speaker 4: Why are you so defensive of Opie's sister?

1046
00:49:56,880 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 6: He wouldn't weird, Yeah, this is weird. He wouldn't listen

1047
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:01,680
Speaker 6: to me.

1048
00:50:01,719 --> 00:50:02,200
Speaker 2: At the time.

1049
00:50:02,520 --> 00:50:05,040
Speaker 6: I was worried sick for my sister, but he was

1050
00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:07,879
Speaker 6: adamant that I just hated her. He continued to visit

1051
00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:10,520
Speaker 6: her under the pretense of spending time with my parents.

1052
00:50:10,920 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 6: If I offered to join them, he'd say no and

1053
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:17,480
Speaker 6: make excuses. I started getting suspicious and spoke to my

1054
00:50:17,520 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 6: best friend, Dude.

1055
00:50:18,719 --> 00:50:21,799
Speaker 4: If my partner was hanging out with my parents. After

1056
00:50:21,880 --> 00:50:24,319
Speaker 4: two months of my us dating, I was like, you

1057
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:28,239
Speaker 4: actually can't come over. I would be pretty suspicious.

1058
00:50:28,400 --> 00:50:29,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, what uh, what are we doing here?

1059
00:50:30,320 --> 00:50:32,240
Speaker 4: Well, why do you like my parents so much.

1060
00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:36,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, and I don't know. I would start thinking, ohp

1061
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:40,920
Speaker 6: seems like a very trusting person. Yeah, if my brother

1062
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:44,960
Speaker 6: was seeing the girl, you know, okay, if my girlfriend

1063
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:48,200
Speaker 6: was seeing my brother who was always doing substances, I

1064
00:50:48,200 --> 00:50:50,879
Speaker 6: would be like, you're probably doing substance too, no matter

1065
00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 6: if you're a judge, magistrate, cop, whatever.

1066
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, and he seems like he's pretty okay with everything,

1067
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:58,719
Speaker 4: and stop judging her stop.

1068
00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:01,560
Speaker 6: I started getting suspicious and spoke to my best friend.

1069
00:51:01,920 --> 00:51:05,560
Speaker 6: They agreed it was suspicious and we knew something was

1070
00:51:05,600 --> 00:51:09,000
Speaker 6: going on. I knew Rod was cheating with Sherry. I

1071
00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:11,400
Speaker 6: got a call from Rod saying he'd pick up Sherry

1072
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:15,080
Speaker 6: so we could all hang out together instead. I confronted

1073
00:51:15,120 --> 00:51:17,919
Speaker 6: them over my suspicion with both of them there.

1074
00:51:18,040 --> 00:51:18,320
Speaker 2: Dang.

1075
00:51:19,400 --> 00:51:22,360
Speaker 6: They denied it and yelled at me, saying I was

1076
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:24,920
Speaker 6: out of order or even thinking such things, that I

1077
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:26,279
Speaker 6: was paranoid.

1078
00:51:25,880 --> 00:51:27,040
Speaker 4: Out of order.

1079
00:51:29,360 --> 00:51:31,760
Speaker 6: He's a judge, he just had his back pocket.

1080
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, he goes, I'm a judge too, and a cop.

1081
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:39,040
Speaker 4: You're too judgmental, and then he winks.

1082
00:51:39,080 --> 00:51:40,800
Speaker 6: Dang, thank you, sheriff.

1083
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 4: Hey, guys, they called me Rodzi.

1084
00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:51,360
Speaker 6: My sister started crying and yelling. Why would you say that?

1085
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:54,719
Speaker 6: I couldn't do that to his sister. When he got

1086
00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:57,880
Speaker 6: back from taking her home, Rod gasol at me, saying

1087
00:51:57,920 --> 00:52:00,960
Speaker 6: that I was paranoid and then I'd hurt my sister's

1088
00:52:00,960 --> 00:52:04,640
Speaker 6: feelings and I should apologize. The argument settled and we

1089
00:52:04,680 --> 00:52:06,880
Speaker 6: went to bed. I didn't sleep with them, as I

1090
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:09,680
Speaker 6: didn't believe a word he said. After a week, I

1091
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:12,960
Speaker 6: couldn't shake it. I ended the relationship. He called me

1092
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:16,520
Speaker 6: names and said he deserved better anyway, and that I'd

1093
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:20,400
Speaker 6: end up old and loan. So only a week after that,

1094
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:22,920
Speaker 6: he and Sherry's announced they.

1095
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:27,360
Speaker 4: Were a couple. We're all surprised. We're all shocked.

1096
00:52:27,960 --> 00:52:30,080
Speaker 6: Yeah, Like if you're cheating on someone.

1097
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:33,840
Speaker 4: At least a little bit. Yeah, literally, why are we

1098
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:35,879
Speaker 4: cheating on people? Just break up?

1099
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:36,319
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1100
00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:39,680
Speaker 6: Also, even if you did sheat, just break up that

1101
00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:41,040
Speaker 6: after it and go with someone.

1102
00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:43,520
Speaker 4: I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it.

1103
00:52:43,680 --> 00:52:46,720
Speaker 6: We got to stop this, stop it. Cut it out,

1104
00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:51,120
Speaker 6: still strongly denying anything had happened whilst Rod and I

1105
00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:54,400
Speaker 6: were together. They both continue to call me paranoid, insecure,

1106
00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:57,399
Speaker 6: and jealous while they were parading their relationship in front

1107
00:52:57,440 --> 00:52:57,640
Speaker 6: of me.

1108
00:52:58,280 --> 00:53:01,600
Speaker 4: To call you paranoid when they're actively dating a week

1109
00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:05,080
Speaker 4: after you guys got broke, you know, broke up, crazy.

1110
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:11,760
Speaker 6: Bad cup, crazy bet. He has a pair of handcuffs. Okay,

1111
00:53:12,320 --> 00:53:14,279
Speaker 6: I just smiled and let him get on with it.

1112
00:53:14,480 --> 00:53:16,480
Speaker 3: I split up only after two months.

1113
00:53:17,719 --> 00:53:20,319
Speaker 4: Wow. Yeah that no one called that.

1114
00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:22,800
Speaker 3: You know why because it was so healthy.

1115
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:25,480
Speaker 4: It was so healthy that they had to split up.

1116
00:53:25,760 --> 00:53:25,880
Speaker 5: Oh.

1117
00:53:25,920 --> 00:53:27,680
Speaker 6: I thought it was because they can't hide any Yeah.

1118
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:29,920
Speaker 5: They was like this is not exciting, Like this is

1119
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:30,800
Speaker 5: actually kind of boring.

1120
00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:31,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, Rush is gone.

1121
00:53:32,280 --> 00:53:34,600
Speaker 4: My sister no longer cares about a relationship. I actually

1122
00:53:34,640 --> 00:53:35,960
Speaker 4: don't want to be sneaky.

1123
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:39,440
Speaker 6: I then called her and said Rod told me the truth.

1124
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:46,160
Speaker 6: He hadn't, but she didn't know that. She didn't confess

1125
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:49,720
Speaker 6: that had been going on for four months and happened

1126
00:53:49,760 --> 00:53:52,600
Speaker 6: in my childhood bedroom.

1127
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 4: You that part out, dude, You stay out of my bedroom.

1128
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:01,719
Speaker 3: Plus my mom knew the whole time.

1129
00:54:03,080 --> 00:54:06,080
Speaker 4: No contact. I'm out, I'm out.

1130
00:54:06,400 --> 00:54:09,560
Speaker 6: Oh my gosh. She also said he had cheated with

1131
00:54:09,640 --> 00:54:12,799
Speaker 6: four or five other women and showed me messages she

1132
00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:15,960
Speaker 6: found on his phone. She claims she only cheated with

1133
00:54:16,040 --> 00:54:18,800
Speaker 6: him because he told her I was calling her names

1134
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 6: and saying bad things behind her back, and that she

1135
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:22,680
Speaker 6: was in a dark place.

1136
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:27,680
Speaker 4: I don't care what you betrayed me. That's insane.

1137
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:30,759
Speaker 3: How does I turn someone on? Hey, your sister's calling

1138
00:54:30,760 --> 00:54:31,319
Speaker 3: you bad names?

1139
00:54:31,400 --> 00:54:32,799
Speaker 4: I think it was just like, oh, well, then it

1140
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:35,080
Speaker 4: doesn't matter what I do to her. Oh I can

1141
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:36,960
Speaker 4: hurt her. I can take her boyfriend.

1142
00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:40,160
Speaker 3: Oh like, yeah, all the bad names it's gonna get

1143
00:54:40,200 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 3: back to her.

1144
00:54:40,680 --> 00:54:47,560
Speaker 6: Yeah so much, Boloney, agreed, Boloney. I told her we

1145
00:54:47,560 --> 00:54:50,600
Speaker 6: were done and walked away. Then I called her Od

1146
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:54,640
Speaker 6: and told him Sherry confessed and I knew everything. He

1147
00:54:54,719 --> 00:54:57,920
Speaker 6: called her names, me names, yelled, and I hung up

1148
00:54:57,920 --> 00:55:00,680
Speaker 6: on him. I'm gonna speak to my sister for long time.

1149
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,280
Speaker 6: But Dad said he wanted us all there two Christmases

1150
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:06,200
Speaker 6: later and didn't want to riff in the family. I

1151
00:55:06,320 --> 00:55:09,839
Speaker 6: buckled and agreed to be civil. By then, I had

1152
00:55:09,840 --> 00:55:13,240
Speaker 6: a new partner. We'll call Rick with a large Oh,

1153
00:55:13,400 --> 00:55:16,440
Speaker 6: come on, she picks the names that rhyme.

1154
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:18,920
Speaker 2: He should have been Rick with a large rod.

1155
00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:23,000
Speaker 4: Or we could just call him Rick or Richard.

1156
00:55:23,200 --> 00:55:24,759
Speaker 2: Yeah right, you know what Richard stands for?

1157
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:30,880
Speaker 6: Yeah, we do know what's.

1158
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:29,480
Speaker 2: Richard's nick name.

1159
00:55:33,440 --> 00:55:36,840
Speaker 6: My little brother name is Richard, and my grandfather, well,

1160
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:38,480
Speaker 6: my uncle's name is Richard.

1161
00:55:38,840 --> 00:55:40,839
Speaker 2: Good for him Rod with a tiny Rick.

1162
00:55:42,760 --> 00:55:45,600
Speaker 3: Sherry flirted with him constantly at family events.

1163
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:49,760
Speaker 4: Leave Rick alone, Sherry, leave him alone.

1164
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:54,720
Speaker 6: We lasted eleven years, but that harmful relationship is mentioned

1165
00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:58,640
Speaker 6: in another post. My now partner we'll call Shane, came

1166
00:55:58,680 --> 00:56:01,080
Speaker 6: into my life as a friend or years later. Oh,

1167
00:56:01,719 --> 00:56:04,680
Speaker 6: Shane doesn't rhyme with anything. She knew what she was doing.

1168
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:08,040
Speaker 2: She knew what she was doing with Shane with pain vain.

1169
00:56:08,760 --> 00:56:11,840
Speaker 6: He met Sherry a few times when he was taken

1170
00:56:12,080 --> 00:56:15,120
Speaker 6: and I was just his friend. Cherry flirted with him

1171
00:56:15,120 --> 00:56:18,000
Speaker 6: in front of his girlfriend, sat on his lap and

1172
00:56:18,120 --> 00:56:18,600
Speaker 6: grind it.

1173
00:56:18,719 --> 00:56:20,520
Speaker 4: I would literally push her off.

1174
00:56:20,960 --> 00:56:22,719
Speaker 6: He looked at me for help, so I pulled her

1175
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:26,200
Speaker 6: off and reminded her that he was taken. She laughed

1176
00:56:26,239 --> 00:56:27,960
Speaker 6: and said she was just being friendly.

1177
00:56:28,480 --> 00:56:29,080
Speaker 4: Excuse me.

1178
00:56:29,360 --> 00:56:33,200
Speaker 6: She also flirted with him at her uncle's funeral and

1179
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:36,600
Speaker 6: another event. Shane was very uncomfortable around her.

1180
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:38,640
Speaker 4: Embarrassing girl.

1181
00:56:38,920 --> 00:56:40,760
Speaker 3: So he sister has a type.

1182
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:43,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's whoever is around you.

1183
00:56:44,040 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 2: It's the taken men.

1184
00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:49,040
Speaker 6: Yeah, and if they're married, it's better apparently two years ago,

1185
00:56:49,280 --> 00:56:52,000
Speaker 6: Shane and I got together, and I pulled her aside

1186
00:56:52,239 --> 00:56:54,480
Speaker 6: and made it clear that if she flirted with Shane

1187
00:56:54,719 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 6: there would be consequences.

1188
00:56:57,040 --> 00:56:59,040
Speaker 4: Don't you do it. Don't do it.

1189
00:57:00,160 --> 00:57:03,080
Speaker 3: Next family gathering, she flirted with them visually.

1190
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 2: She flirted.

1191
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:06,640
Speaker 4: And that's when I go over there and I say

1192
00:57:07,239 --> 00:57:09,719
Speaker 4: bop bope, and then I walk out the door.

1193
00:57:09,880 --> 00:57:11,400
Speaker 6: That's when I got to shovel and just hit her

1194
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 6: with it.

1195
00:57:11,760 --> 00:57:12,399
Speaker 4: Oh dang.

1196
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:16,280
Speaker 6: So she flirted with them visually, waving her assets in

1197
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:19,480
Speaker 6: his direction and bending seductively in front of them.

1198
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:19,960
Speaker 2: She did the.

1199
00:57:20,280 --> 00:57:23,360
Speaker 4: Bended stuff, the ben snap, ben and snap.

1200
00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:26,280
Speaker 6: I love the waving her assets in his direction and

1201
00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:27,720
Speaker 6: bending so definetly in front of him.

1202
00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:28,400
Speaker 2: I love that part.

1203
00:57:28,840 --> 00:57:32,200
Speaker 6: I warned her again, reminding her of she's not interested,

1204
00:57:32,200 --> 00:57:34,920
Speaker 6: that he's not interested and never will be, and if

1205
00:57:34,960 --> 00:57:39,160
Speaker 6: she kept flirting with him, I'd respond unkindly. Shane now

1206
00:57:39,280 --> 00:57:42,880
Speaker 6: dreads family get togethers if Sherry's attending, and I'd dread

1207
00:57:42,920 --> 00:57:43,240
Speaker 6: him too.

1208
00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:44,919
Speaker 2: I hate being near her.

1209
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,600
Speaker 6: I don't trust her, and I don't want to keep

1210
00:57:47,600 --> 00:57:50,800
Speaker 6: playing happy families when she and my parents cause me

1211
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:54,000
Speaker 6: more stress than I can deal with. I've now decided

1212
00:57:54,000 --> 00:57:56,040
Speaker 6: that I'm not doing Christmas at my parents this year.

1213
00:57:56,360 --> 00:57:59,400
Speaker 6: I've gone low contact with Sherry and my mom, and

1214
00:57:59,640 --> 00:58:02,280
Speaker 6: I only see my dad when he comes here to

1215
00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:05,200
Speaker 6: visit my son. So am I the a hole for

1216
00:58:05,240 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 6: not trusting my sister and for not wanting to be

1217
00:58:08,240 --> 00:58:11,120
Speaker 6: near her even though the cheating was fourteen years ago?

1218
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:14,360
Speaker 6: Should I let it go or should I stay low contact?

1219
00:58:14,680 --> 00:58:17,439
Speaker 6: I would go no contact, but I have family members

1220
00:58:17,480 --> 00:58:19,640
Speaker 6: who actually loved me dearly, who are good to me

1221
00:58:19,880 --> 00:58:24,120
Speaker 6: and don't know if the rift between Sherry and myself exists.

1222
00:58:24,520 --> 00:58:27,880
Speaker 4: We have comments, Oh, pee, a farmer doesn't trust a

1223
00:58:27,960 --> 00:58:32,200
Speaker 4: fox in a henhouse, therefore you are not the a hole.

1224
00:58:32,480 --> 00:58:32,720
Speaker 2: Yep.

1225
00:58:33,120 --> 00:58:33,800
Speaker 3: Protect her?

1226
00:58:34,440 --> 00:58:38,560
Speaker 5: Yeahprecied a lot of that in this episode.

1227
00:58:39,240 --> 00:58:42,080
Speaker 4: Okay, Well, anyway, I give him an in and she

1228
00:58:42,200 --> 00:58:42,720
Speaker 4: thanks him mile.

1229
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:46,160
Speaker 6: Yeah, protect her, Richard, Come number one, Your sister keeps

1230
00:58:46,160 --> 00:58:48,440
Speaker 6: doing this crap to you because you let her get

1231
00:58:48,480 --> 00:58:51,400
Speaker 6: away with it every time. Cause the scene. Make her

1232
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:53,520
Speaker 6: explain to you in front of everyone in your family

1233
00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:56,560
Speaker 6: why she insists on flirting and grinding on every partner

1234
00:58:56,560 --> 00:58:59,480
Speaker 6: you've ever brought around to her. Let them all know

1235
00:58:59,720 --> 00:59:02,440
Speaker 6: about the pattern, And that began when she cheated on

1236
00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:04,600
Speaker 6: you with your ex and your mom knew about it.

1237
00:59:05,080 --> 00:59:08,520
Speaker 6: Bring her shame to light. Quit carrying it for her,

1238
00:59:08,880 --> 00:59:12,400
Speaker 6: get scorched earth, and live your life. Obie says she

1239
00:59:12,560 --> 00:59:15,480
Speaker 6: stopped when I threatened her the second time. I told

1240
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:18,680
Speaker 6: her that I would make everyone aware of her behavior

1241
00:59:19,000 --> 00:59:22,160
Speaker 6: and wouldn't hold back throwing hands next time. She hasn't

1242
00:59:22,200 --> 00:59:24,400
Speaker 6: come near Shane for two family events.

1243
00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:24,640
Speaker 3: Now.

1244
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:27,440
Speaker 6: I blocked her years ago, and now my youngest sister

1245
00:59:27,800 --> 00:59:30,840
Speaker 6: has done the same. My mom's family, well, the decent

1246
00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:33,720
Speaker 6: ones have blocked her. Her friends has sown her after

1247
00:59:33,800 --> 00:59:36,080
Speaker 6: I told them about her. I never let her get

1248
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:40,160
Speaker 6: away with it. She always got consequences, but she just

1249
00:59:40,440 --> 00:59:43,000
Speaker 6: never stopped until a year ago when I lost it

1250
00:59:43,080 --> 00:59:45,520
Speaker 6: and threatened her. Even Dad stopped standing up for her

1251
00:59:45,560 --> 00:59:48,400
Speaker 6: at that point. He knew she'd pushed me too far

1252
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:49,920
Speaker 6: and knew I was done.

1253
00:59:50,080 --> 00:59:50,720
Speaker 2: She knew too.

1254
00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:51,760
Speaker 3: It scared her.

1255
00:59:52,080 --> 00:59:55,280
Speaker 6: She's been very sheep as this last year, and no

1256
00:59:55,320 --> 00:59:59,160
Speaker 6: one has sided with her this time. The consequences are happening,

1257
00:59:59,520 --> 01:00:03,280
Speaker 6: and have always happened. It just was always only me

1258
01:00:03,480 --> 01:00:06,360
Speaker 6: dealing with the punishment back then. Everyone until a year

1259
01:00:06,400 --> 01:00:10,120
Speaker 6: ago had her back and That's why my threats meant little,

1260
01:00:10,200 --> 01:00:13,920
Speaker 6: because she knew Dad would step in. Now she knows

1261
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:16,800
Speaker 6: he won't. Plus, my kids have grown up, and my

1262
01:00:16,920 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 6: daughter in particular has made it very clear that she

1263
01:00:20,400 --> 01:00:24,720
Speaker 6: also won't tolerate her behavior. I guess I asked the

1264
01:00:24,760 --> 01:00:27,920
Speaker 6: wrong question. Really, I probably should have asked. Am I

1265
01:00:27,960 --> 01:00:30,400
Speaker 6: wrong to not trust her? Am I the a hole

1266
01:00:30,480 --> 01:00:33,040
Speaker 6: for threatening her to the point she's now scared of me?

1267
01:00:33,640 --> 01:00:34,240
Speaker 2: We have an edit?

1268
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:39,120
Speaker 6: I think, no, no, no, no no no.

1269
01:00:39,240 --> 01:00:42,080
Speaker 4: She saw she kept doing it because she knew she

1270
01:00:42,080 --> 01:00:44,720
Speaker 4: could a reaction at it. And then you reacted, and

1271
01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:45,520
Speaker 4: here we are.

1272
01:00:45,680 --> 01:00:48,920
Speaker 6: And whenever you and whenever your sister Rod were dating.

1273
01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:51,520
Speaker 6: The reason it only lasted two months because she was like, oh,

1274
01:00:51,600 --> 01:00:55,120
Speaker 6: this isn't fun anymore, because my sister isn't reacting exactly.

1275
01:00:55,200 --> 01:00:56,360
Speaker 4: She's searching for a reaction.

1276
01:00:56,960 --> 01:00:58,280
Speaker 2: She loves poking the bear.

1277
01:01:00,040 --> 01:01:03,280
Speaker 6: We haven't edit since Shane and I got together. Cherry

1278
01:01:03,400 --> 01:01:07,600
Speaker 6: hasn't touched him. It's been visual flirting and it happened twice.

1279
01:01:07,880 --> 01:01:10,920
Speaker 6: The first time I told her stop. Second time I

1280
01:01:11,040 --> 01:01:11,920
Speaker 6: wasn't so polite.

1281
01:01:12,560 --> 01:01:18,680
Speaker 4: Wopped her. Walloped her is what I meant to say. Wolloped.

1282
01:01:19,160 --> 01:01:21,400
Speaker 6: We only attended one family event a year. Mom was

1283
01:01:21,400 --> 01:01:25,320
Speaker 6: a recluse, so she doesn't attend. I also don't talk

1284
01:01:25,360 --> 01:01:29,120
Speaker 6: to her. Cherry's blocked on all my media and devices.

1285
01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:33,040
Speaker 6: My last threat to her was quite verbally aggressive, and

1286
01:01:33,080 --> 01:01:35,240
Speaker 6: I lost it with her. That was a year ago.

1287
01:01:35,640 --> 01:01:37,920
Speaker 6: Dad didn't set up for her this time, and she

1288
01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:41,680
Speaker 6: got scared. He finally saw her for who she was,

1289
01:01:42,200 --> 01:01:44,240
Speaker 6: and my dad and I have been trying to work

1290
01:01:44,280 --> 01:01:48,360
Speaker 6: things out. Both events we've attended since I lost it

1291
01:01:48,400 --> 01:01:51,480
Speaker 6: at her, she has stayed away from Shane, so I

1292
01:01:51,480 --> 01:01:54,440
Speaker 6: think I actually scared her this time. Shane has me,

1293
01:01:54,720 --> 01:01:58,400
Speaker 6: my daughter, and her girlfriend around him at these events

1294
01:01:58,480 --> 01:02:00,960
Speaker 6: all the times. Wait, what who's her girlfriend?

1295
01:02:01,320 --> 01:02:01,640
Speaker 4: Daughter?

1296
01:02:02,000 --> 01:02:03,640
Speaker 3: Does the daughter have her children? Mmm?

1297
01:02:04,280 --> 01:02:06,960
Speaker 6: Okay, someone has a girlfriend. I have always let him

1298
01:02:06,960 --> 01:02:09,560
Speaker 6: know that he doesn't have to be there at any

1299
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:12,520
Speaker 6: of these events, but due to my family history and

1300
01:02:12,640 --> 01:02:17,400
Speaker 6: the resulting PTSD, he insists on being with me. We

1301
01:02:17,480 --> 01:02:20,560
Speaker 6: no longer do Christmas at my parents, and the one

1302
01:02:20,600 --> 01:02:23,680
Speaker 6: event we do attend is a birthday reunion at my uncle's.

1303
01:02:23,920 --> 01:02:26,280
Speaker 6: We attend it because it's the only time we get

1304
01:02:26,320 --> 01:02:30,520
Speaker 6: to see the elderly members of the family. All live

1305
01:02:30,760 --> 01:02:34,840
Speaker 6: quite a distance away in different directions. My uncle's house

1306
01:02:34,880 --> 01:02:38,880
Speaker 6: is in the middle ground and used to be my grandparents' house.

1307
01:02:39,440 --> 01:02:42,480
Speaker 6: These relatives are all in their eighties and love Shane,

1308
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:46,080
Speaker 6: and he also loves them. They've always have been good

1309
01:02:46,080 --> 01:02:48,760
Speaker 6: to me and don't and don't know the family pass

1310
01:02:48,840 --> 01:02:51,640
Speaker 6: with us as children, nor do they know about Sherry's

1311
01:02:51,680 --> 01:02:54,680
Speaker 6: behavior due to the age and ailments. I'm not involving

1312
01:02:54,720 --> 01:02:55,120
Speaker 6: them now.

1313
01:02:55,360 --> 01:02:56,240
Speaker 2: A little bit left here.

1314
01:02:56,760 --> 01:02:57,440
Speaker 3: It's cute.

1315
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:00,680
Speaker 4: I just think you gotta cut you know, Sherry off

1316
01:03:00,680 --> 01:03:03,320
Speaker 4: as much as you can see the family members you

1317
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:07,640
Speaker 4: do like and there you go, and I wallop her

1318
01:03:07,760 --> 01:03:11,720
Speaker 4: every time she tries to get near Shane. Every time.

1319
01:03:11,800 --> 01:03:14,000
Speaker 4: Every time she like goes towards Shane, you just go.

1320
01:03:14,800 --> 01:03:19,360
Speaker 6: Yep, five like five yards away, distance more maybe ten yards.

1321
01:03:20,000 --> 01:03:23,280
Speaker 4: You go ah ah ah.

1322
01:03:25,720 --> 01:03:25,840
Speaker 5: Uh.

1323
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:30,400
Speaker 6: Rod w says justice for Rod's feel better to go

1324
01:03:30,440 --> 01:03:31,000
Speaker 6: to Rod.

1325
01:03:31,080 --> 01:03:35,479
Speaker 2: You're in a bad place. You're like, you're in bad mode.

1326
01:03:35,640 --> 01:03:38,920
Speaker 3: Rod.

1327
01:03:38,960 --> 01:03:43,160
Speaker 4: Does that stand for Rodney Roderick? Roderick.

1328
01:03:43,640 --> 01:03:46,960
Speaker 3: That's not my Roderick, Roderick, think about Rock.

1329
01:03:47,160 --> 01:03:48,280
Speaker 2: We got a little bit left here.

1330
01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:51,919
Speaker 6: I am in therapy for c PTSD, and I'm being

1331
01:03:51,960 --> 01:03:54,920
Speaker 6: guided by Shane and friends to pull away from toxic

1332
01:03:55,040 --> 01:03:58,280
Speaker 6: family members. Thanks to some comments on this post, I

1333
01:03:58,320 --> 01:04:02,560
Speaker 6: am looking into sorting meetups with the elderly family members

1334
01:04:02,600 --> 01:04:06,160
Speaker 6: away from my sister. On the plus side, these meetups

1335
01:04:06,240 --> 01:04:10,000
Speaker 6: will involve overnight or we can stays so that means

1336
01:04:10,040 --> 01:04:13,920
Speaker 6: more time with each relative. Shane is very up for

1337
01:04:14,000 --> 01:04:17,800
Speaker 6: it because it means no Sherry, a mini holiday, quality

1338
01:04:17,880 --> 01:04:20,880
Speaker 6: time with family that he and I love, and they

1339
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:25,160
Speaker 6: all live near somewhere related to our mutual hobby. If

1340
01:04:25,160 --> 01:04:28,720
Speaker 6: we can sort this out mean we don't have to

1341
01:04:28,760 --> 01:04:30,919
Speaker 6: it's end the birthday reunion each year.