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Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio

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Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.

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Speaker 2: We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.

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Speaker 1: What's up y'all? That your girl aj Holiday? What's up tam.

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Speaker 2: Bama, y'all. I love y'all so much, Thank you for

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Speaker 2: coming back.

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Speaker 1: Again this week. Yo.

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Speaker 2: I'm fat as hell, bro.

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Speaker 1: Like we're blaming everything on Hawaiians going, y'all, hear me

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Speaker 1: at Taco Bell. They don't close up too.

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Speaker 2: Statass niggas fit too.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, bitch, I'm fat because let me tell you,

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Speaker 1: I saw Instagram how people be making their own the

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Speaker 1: twist from Taco Bell. That's the only thing I'll eat

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Speaker 1: from Taco Bell. But you could buy like there. It's

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Speaker 1: like noodles is week noodles though, and you fry him

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Speaker 1: and they turn into those puffs and then you put

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Speaker 1: the cinnamon and sugar on.

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Speaker 2: Oh I saw that ship on.

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Speaker 1: That be throwing the sunglasses to the wall.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I saw his glass. I saw him do that ship.

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Speaker 2: I was like, that is fire. I want to try.

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Speaker 1: When I tell y'all, I went to a Whole Foods

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Speaker 1: Public's Harris Teeter. I couldn't I went to the Mexican

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Speaker 1: grocery store. They did not have the uh there. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. They call it you not your rolls, but

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Speaker 1: it's it's like a wheat noodle and you know, at

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Speaker 1: a certain heat, like it blows up like that. I cannot.

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Speaker 1: I've spent an evening looking for them ship locally, and

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Speaker 1: I just seen that.

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Speaker 2: Here.

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Speaker 1: Spend an evening looking for them ship one day when

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Speaker 1: I saw that post, because I love those things, but

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Speaker 1: I hate fast food. Like I'll be trying to make

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Speaker 1: all this ship at the house, but making Chinese at

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Speaker 1: the house now type of ship.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we gotta do better the podcast festival that we're

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Speaker 2: gonna be. We talk fat in the podcast festival right now,

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Speaker 2: y'all this big term bro for real?

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Speaker 1: Bit, why you gotta remember.

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Speaker 2: What you say? I bet I benefitted this ship a

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Speaker 2: big tail bam every week. Yeah, what'd you do over

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Speaker 2: the weekend? I ain't look for your rolls.

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Speaker 1: Ain't too much work. And the rest of my fucking

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Speaker 1: nerves bought them five hundred dollar almost six hundred dollars

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Speaker 1: pots from home Since, which is a news store like

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Speaker 1: home goods. It's like the same line. Y'all got a

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Speaker 1: home since there.

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Speaker 2: This one is Charlotte girl.

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Speaker 1: Five these parts is five hundred and eighty dollars, bitch

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Speaker 1: for two pots and he bor. Yeah, but they're one

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Speaker 1: hundred per copper and stainless steel, so they shouldn' last

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Speaker 1: meet for life. So bitch, you come here, you serving

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Speaker 1: you out them pots? The pots going on to the table.

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Speaker 2: I listen, I would if I'm supposed to come to Charleston.

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Speaker 2: If I come to Charleston on Thursday, can you make

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Speaker 2: me something to eat?

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Speaker 1: What healthy we got water? I gotta look. I made

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Speaker 1: spaghetti on Sunday. That's what I be eating the whole week.

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Speaker 1: Veggie I used beyond meat and there a bunch of

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Speaker 1: vegetables and I did put shrimp in it.

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Speaker 2: That's what I hate about spaghetti though, Well all week long. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's an all week meal. When you make that ship

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Speaker 2: that's gonna.

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Speaker 1: Be four days old. If you're coming on Thursday.

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Speaker 2: What did I do over the weekend? I feel like

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Speaker 2: I did something I don't be remembering I did it,

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Speaker 2: And that's what I'm saying. I cannot remember what I

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Speaker 2: did this weekend. Oh worked, that was it. I worked

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Speaker 2: this weekend and then I come back and I hung

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Speaker 2: out with the old baby and that was it. It

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Speaker 2: was very like Sunday. I rested back to so m h.

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Speaker 2: I was getting the sands.

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Speaker 1: Uh, we'll be high. I went out.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Keky Shepherd died.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I saw that. I played Keiki Shepherd and a

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Speaker 1: play I did it was actually dream Girls in Charleston

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Speaker 1: my last year of high school. It was a big

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Speaker 1: play though. The whole city came out. We had like

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Speaker 1: we did like four maybe maybe four or five uh

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Speaker 1: dates and times. But I played Kiki Shepherd. I would

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Speaker 1: swimming back then, bitch obviously, and the director stole my

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Speaker 1: fucking dresses. I had all a nice ass sparkly shipped

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Speaker 1: from all the thrift stores around Charleston, and he was like,

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Speaker 1: just give it to me. We're gonna clean him. Never

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Speaker 1: got my ship back. Demn, I played Kiki Shepherd. I

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Speaker 1: love her. Man.

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Speaker 2: She's definitely too.

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Speaker 1: She was definitely a staple in the black community for sure.

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Speaker 2: Yes, Shepherd Paolo coming out looking like a bad bitch

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Speaker 2: every week.

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Speaker 1: Yes, she apparently had a sudden heart attack at seventy

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Speaker 1: seven years old. Seventy four years old.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, damn, rest in peace, k Shepherd.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Man nineteen eighty seven in two thousand and two,

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Speaker 1: that's how long she graced the stage at the Polla Theater.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and that was a long time. Yep. M did

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Speaker 2: you watch the Oscars?

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Speaker 1: I did not. I have not watched any of those

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Speaker 1: award shows, you know, because my brain be working too much, right,

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Speaker 1: so I know what I'm looking at, so I can't.

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Speaker 2: Did you did you watch it? Any of the clips

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Speaker 2: like of Michael B.

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Speaker 1: Jordan And I love them. I'm so like that shit.

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Speaker 1: Every time I see Old Boy winning an award like that

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Speaker 1: should be like, bitch, start right, We'll finish writing because

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Speaker 1: I got a great movie out this motherfucker. Okay, do

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Speaker 1: it man.

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Speaker 2: I'm to tell you is do that ship Man what

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Speaker 2: you waiting on? Because I want to audition.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I'm so proud of him. I'm so proud of him.

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Speaker 1: And you know they they basically like in Hall of

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Speaker 1: Fame now at this point for movies.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, they go down in history. I love, love,

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Speaker 2: love how Ryan Coogler speaks about his wife. Oh my god,

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Speaker 2: I just love that ship down mm hmmmmm. It's so

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Speaker 2: beautiful how he you know, champions her and everything that

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Speaker 2: he does. You know m hm.

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Speaker 1: And that's how you get all your gifts from God.

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Speaker 1: They come via women. I can't say that shit enough

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Speaker 1: to find you one and lock in period. Yeah, because

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Speaker 1: he always gives things there because she was the one

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Speaker 1: who brought it, bought him Final Draft, which is the

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Speaker 1: program you used to write your scripts. He talks about that.

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Speaker 1: I saw him, not on the Breakfast Club something I

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Speaker 1: was watching. I see I saw him talk about you know,

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Speaker 1: how she purchased the program for him. So like this

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Speaker 1: Nigga had an idea and she helped him execute. Of

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Speaker 1: course you're supposed to give things.

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Speaker 2: And she was crying when he was doing his speech,

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Speaker 2: and it was just so beautiful. Oh, I got a

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Speaker 2: beautiful story to share with y'all. It's sad, but it's beautiful.

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Speaker 2: My one of my sister's best friends. He flew in

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Speaker 2: from Hawaii to go to his cousin's wedding. His cousin

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Speaker 2: was sick with cancer and he was getting married and

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Speaker 2: he was really sick, you know, like really knocking on

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Speaker 2: deaths door. But him and his wife, his girlfriend, who

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Speaker 2: they had three kids, they wanted to go ahead and

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Speaker 2: get married. They had been planning to be married and

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Speaker 2: you know, the sickness came in, it wasn't going to

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Speaker 2: stop them. So that weekend was the weekend of the wedding.

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Speaker 2: All all the family had come to town. Everybody was

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Speaker 2: ready to celebrate their nuptials, and they're in that week

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Speaker 2: before the wedding. He took very ill and ended up

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Speaker 2: in the hospital and then ended up on life support.

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Speaker 2: So the wedding was supposed to be that Sunday. By Wednesday,

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Speaker 2: he was not doing too good in the hospital. So

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Speaker 2: by Friday they were going to pull the plug on him,

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Speaker 2: and you know, see if he survived or not. They

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Speaker 2: pulled the plug and he did not pass away, so

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Speaker 2: they decided to if he was gonna, you know, still

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Speaker 2: be alive, they wanted to go ahead and have the wedding.

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Speaker 2: So they had all the bridesmaids, the bride get dressed up,

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Speaker 2: everybody come to the closest family, not all the guests,

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Speaker 2: but all the closest family I could fit in that room.

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Speaker 2: They went to the hospital. The pastor came to the

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Speaker 2: hospital and there did the vows by the bedside of

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Speaker 2: his hospital bed, and when it was his turn to

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Speaker 2: say I do he shook his head. Yes, he couldn't

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Speaker 2: speak anymore, but he shook his head yes, and then

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Speaker 2: they kissed, and an hour later he passed away. Girl,

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Speaker 2: what yes? Ain't that crazy? He said that all he

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Speaker 2: wanted to do was make it to his wedding. He

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Speaker 2: wanted to make an honest woman of his the mother

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Speaker 2: of his kids, and he died an hour after doing that. Baby,

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Speaker 2: When I tell you, I cried so hard on Sunday,

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Speaker 2: I ain't never met these people today in my life,

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Speaker 2: but when I tell you, I cried because it was

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Speaker 2: so beautiful and so sad and it sounded like something

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Speaker 2: Shonda Rhym's road, but not in real life. So that happened, y'all.

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Speaker 1: Where were they at now? In South Carolina? D c

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Speaker 1: Oh Okay, it's happened in DC. Damn it, man, But

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Speaker 1: what a beautiful he's doing?

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Speaker 2: Well? Yeah, I mean yeah, so I know that was

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Speaker 2: kind of random, but I just wanted to share that

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Speaker 2: story with y'all because I mean, how you know that's

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Speaker 2: a wild story and a beautiful story and it said

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Speaker 2: story all at once.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So, now how do we transition in now to E. J.

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Speaker 2: Johnson? Because that's what I want to talk about. Go ahead, so.

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Speaker 1: So Carlos King sat down with e J. Johnson on

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Speaker 1: his podcast, which is also on the Black Effect Podcast Network,

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Speaker 1: and e J. Johnson had a lot of choice words right.

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Speaker 1: A few that I can remember is that you know,

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Speaker 1: he looks better than women most of us in.

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Speaker 2: The skirt.

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Speaker 1: And a skirt, and also that he does not date

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Speaker 1: straight men. He he only dates street only date straight men.

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Speaker 1: Excuse me, he only dates straight men. I'm trying to

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Speaker 1: figure out what the fuck does that mean? At the

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Speaker 1: game listen, you know what?

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Speaker 2: And me and a friend of the show you know

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Speaker 2: as well, we were powowing last night through DMS and

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Speaker 2: he said he understood that sentiment about only dating straight men,

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Speaker 2: and I was I was like, can I ask a question?

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Speaker 2: Because what kind of fuck is sys?

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Speaker 1: Do that make?

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Speaker 2: Because I could, like, I just be confused, and y'all

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Speaker 2: forgive me. But if you were dating him as a man,

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Speaker 2: and both of y'all are men, he is no longer

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Speaker 2: a straight man. He is not straight, So how can

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Speaker 2: you only like straight men? Right? That's not a straight man? Right?

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Speaker 1: Am I crazy? Right? And if you are a man

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Speaker 1: of a certain age, you ain't just now randomly about

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Speaker 1: to run into e J. Johnson and Haller at him. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you have had dealings with other men before, so is

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Speaker 1: the process that this man has never been with a

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Speaker 1: man prior to you?

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Speaker 2: Is that what he means like?

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Speaker 1: Or do you mean you want a man who primarily

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Speaker 1: only dates women, but then it's also attracted to you

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Speaker 1: because you think you're a woman.

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Speaker 2: Right, either way, it's not a straight man. I don't

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Speaker 2: care how you put a cheek. It's not the same thing.

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Speaker 2: You can if you rub it down.

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Speaker 1: Everybody game, everybody under saying what we're talking about. And

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Speaker 1: the part about him, you know, looking better than a

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Speaker 1: woman in a skirt. I mean, I don't know if

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Speaker 1: it was shade, but I feel like all a lot

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Speaker 1: of gay men they try to slight women in that way.

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Speaker 1: They're always talking about how they look more of a

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Speaker 1: woman than a woman because being a woman. I say

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Speaker 1: this over and over again, it's not about aesthetic. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you can you can go to the hospital, I mean,

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Speaker 1: go to get surgery to look like a woman. Yes,

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Speaker 1: you can do that, right, but you will still not

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Speaker 1: be a woman biologically.

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Speaker 2: You're just not and you know what, and be whoever

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Speaker 2: you want to be. That's fine, but I just hate

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Speaker 2: why you gotta you know, not women in the process

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Speaker 2: of you becoming whoever you are, Like why you can

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Speaker 2: say I look better than any woman in a skirt?

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Speaker 2: Like why even do that? That's just unnecessary shade to me.

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Speaker 2: Because you can think you fine, and it's okay to

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Speaker 2: think you fine and think you a woman or whatever

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Speaker 2: you think you are. I don't care, that's your prerogative.

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Speaker 2: But when you start saying shit like that, like now,

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Speaker 2: that's shade to me, Like what I had to do

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Speaker 2: with your shit? Why are you talking about?

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Speaker 1: You know absolutely nothing, I think, and only that difference

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Speaker 1: between gay men and straight men who you know, just

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Speaker 1: publicly or outright have this disdain for women is that

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Speaker 1: one is gay and one Saitian gay. One is outright

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Speaker 1: gay because both of them behaving on women, all of

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Speaker 1: them behating on women's like they cannot stand us because

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Speaker 1: they are not us. That is what it balls down to.

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Speaker 1: And also, you dating supposed heterosexual man, that means that

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Speaker 1: man has a family, probably he has children, he has

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Speaker 1: a wife, he has a girlfriend, and it does something

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Speaker 1: for you to also have access to that man.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it makes you feel like you have more

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Speaker 2: proximity to womanhood or something. I don't know, that's what

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Speaker 2: That's what I would imagine like, but like if you

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Speaker 2: have a gay man friend, like they do be the

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Speaker 2: best friends too. Though my gay homeboy be hyping me

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Speaker 2: up even when I fat he'd be like in all

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Speaker 2: the right places.

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Speaker 1: Be No. A lot of them are sweet people, but

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Speaker 1: then they have this little this They all have a

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Speaker 1: little thing with him, right, this little competition with women.

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Speaker 1: And we're not in competition with y'all the minute. If

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Speaker 1: I'm fucking with somebody, like God forbid this, whatever happened,

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Speaker 1: let me know.

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Speaker 2: But I think that might be the fem ones, because

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Speaker 2: it's something that do you think it's the the masculine presenting, No,

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Speaker 2: it's usually the.

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Speaker 1: Feminine or the transsexuals. Usually those are the ones who

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Speaker 1: you know. I saw you know T. S. Madison. She

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Speaker 1: was online one time she was like, we are the

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Speaker 1: men who protect trans women? Like what, you're a man,

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Speaker 1: protect yourself? Then what we're talking about? You are talking

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Speaker 1: about where are the men to protect trans women? What?

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Speaker 1: What are we talking about? I will not. I refuse

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Speaker 1: to play into this delusion with these grown ass men.

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Speaker 1: I refuse because again, the highest form of patriarchy is

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Speaker 1: for a man to tell you, bitch, I'm you because

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Speaker 1: I feel like it. No, sir, you're a man and

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Speaker 1: all who'll get mad about it because you don't care

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Speaker 1: about about our feelings.

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Speaker 2: They don't.

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Speaker 1: They got to respect their stances, but they they don't

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Speaker 1: give a damn what we're talking about, because it's stow patriarchy.

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Speaker 1: You do not hear from trans men. You do not

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Speaker 1: hear trans men, which are women out here ruha and

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Speaker 1: and everybody face and I'm stronger. Don't let me tell

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Speaker 1: you women, we we be the best at all the

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Speaker 1: ship because those trans men be fine as hell.

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Speaker 2: Do you hear me some of them? Some women ask

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Speaker 2: me fat like I hain't seeing the trans with their

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Speaker 2: fat asses.

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Speaker 1: Or something that you can understand why they trans into

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Speaker 1: to a man and they be pregnant?

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Speaker 2: What is that? Shrak? What is That's a lot going on?

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Speaker 2: It's a lot happening. What is happening? You got that

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Speaker 2: big old bookie.

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Speaker 1: One of my cousins. Hey, girl, boy, whatever the fuck?

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Speaker 1: She got the fattest ass in the world. She a

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Speaker 1: boy in the relationship, the fat she and she got

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Speaker 1: kinkles like the gas legs always to the ankle. That's

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Speaker 1: a fat I bitch. Okay, she's the boy, and I'll

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Speaker 1: always be like, how are you doing all that with

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Speaker 1: that fat ass?

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Speaker 2: Let's sagging girl? You pull your pants up so with

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Speaker 2: fat need a lap dance? Shame all right? So any

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Speaker 2: n L E chopper says, you ain't never been through

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Speaker 2: shit if you wear a seat belt. So he is

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Speaker 2: riding down the street with no seat belt on talking

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Speaker 2: about if you wear a seat belt, you ain't been

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Speaker 2: through shit. If you ever see him in the seat belt.

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Speaker 2: He riding with somebody who he feels like can't drive,

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Speaker 2: and that's the only time he wear a seat belt

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Speaker 2: because he done have real life experiences.

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Speaker 1: Boy, you stupid because you're not concerned about getting accidents

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Speaker 1: with other people. I can drive, I wear a seatbelt

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Speaker 1: because somebody else might hit me right driving.

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Speaker 2: Where's the sense? And these are this is the people

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Speaker 2: that like young youth are looking up to. And it's scary.

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Speaker 1: You think niggas looking up the NL E chopper.

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Speaker 2: Young maybe young niggas. So now they're thinking like now

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Speaker 2: they're riding down the street with no seatbelt because they

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Speaker 2: want to prove they've been through some ship I've been

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Speaker 2: jumped on loose.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be loose in the car, Like

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Speaker 1: when I don't got my seatput on, I feel loose,

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Speaker 1: like baked. I just feel like I'm just all over

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Speaker 1: the place in the car, like whoa, whoa.

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Speaker 2: Over the speed bulls bitch and jumping up.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, put your fucking seatput on, stupid boy. It ain't

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Speaker 1: just because it's not just for you, okay, Like even

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Speaker 1: if you are a good driver, everybody is not a

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Speaker 1: good driver. Somebody can hit you and you got no

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Speaker 1: seatput on. So now your ass going at.

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Speaker 2: The windshield because you've been through stuff?

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Speaker 1: Who sass?

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Speaker 2: You go beat through the bullshit? You go be through

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Speaker 2: a wishy.

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Speaker 1: Take me through there?

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Speaker 2: Where we going?

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Speaker 1: Twin right, y'all?

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Speaker 2: So I have an eminem messy meme.

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Speaker 1: The game the game Twitter and said, we all here

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Speaker 1: calling each other mattress sizes, twin king and queen. I

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Speaker 1: guess we ain't say foe though. I feel full right now.

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Speaker 2: That's me right now, damn.

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Speaker 1: Your full twin queen.

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Speaker 2: Book. What are we talking about this week?

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Speaker 1: All right, y'all? You know how I always say like

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Speaker 1: I feel like our podcast for me, my target market

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Speaker 1: is you know, the younger women, right, y'all can live

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Speaker 1: vicuriously through us, so you don't have to go through

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Speaker 1: the dumb ship. But I wanted to talk about some

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Speaker 1: things you wish you would have listened to at twenty

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Speaker 1: five or something. Somebody may have told your ass that

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Speaker 1: you didn't listen to that now at your current age,

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Speaker 1: you wish you had. That's one. That's what I want

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Speaker 1: to talk about today. Okay, I head make a soft ass.

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Speaker 2: Listen, let's get into it. We'll be right back. Okay.

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Speaker 2: So I have one that should resonate with everybody over

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Speaker 2: forty years old. You are not I've been doing the

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Speaker 2: whole thing. You are not fat, you are not ugly.

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Speaker 2: You don't look bad the body that you have right now.

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Speaker 2: In fifteen years from now, you're gonna look back and

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Speaker 2: be like, it wasn't that bad. I used to be

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Speaker 2: so that on my body. I used to be so

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Speaker 2: hard on my body at twenty five, so hard on

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Speaker 2: myself I'm thirty, So hard on myself at thirty five,

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Speaker 2: you know, just hard on your body and how it looks,

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Speaker 2: and always eat like I'm getting on here and I'm

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Speaker 2: saying I'm fat. But I'm more comfortable in my fatness

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Speaker 2: than I've ever been, honestly, like.

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Speaker 1: I've hold on now, but we ain't about to wait

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Speaker 1: till we ten ten more years from now, and looking

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Speaker 1: back like, oh, I wasn't that bad, because I'll be

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Speaker 1: damned if I'm any bigger than what I am right now.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I got new year up right now because

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Speaker 2: I'm waddling bitch. But I'll be damn but even in

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Speaker 2: my wattle, my skin will be tighter than it is.

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Speaker 2: Ten years from now, my ill just be more youthful.

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Speaker 2: You know, I'll just be ten years older. So we

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Speaker 2: just have to appreciate the body that we have while

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Speaker 2: were in it, while we in the moment, and stop

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Speaker 2: being hard on ourselves. So that's definitely one, because I

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Speaker 2: know we all look back on that on pictures from

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Speaker 2: like and I was like, damn, I was saying I

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Speaker 2: was fat. I looked good as fuck right there, right?

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Speaker 1: Can I get back there?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: I was looking at some pictures and when I used

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Speaker 1: to live in Saint Louis, and I feel like I

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Speaker 1: probably had the best body, I would say then. So

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Speaker 1: that would have been like twenty from twenty eleven to

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Speaker 1: twenty fifteen or twenty ten to twenty fifteen, and then

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Speaker 1: like sometime like in two thousand, I don't know, eight

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Speaker 1: something like that, Like I don't know. It was a

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Speaker 1: good it was a good little I just remember my

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Speaker 1: mind being different around that time too, right, I was

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Speaker 1: way more disciplined around that time. I was kind of

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Speaker 1: more isolated because I was living away with no family,

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Speaker 1: hardly no friends, and I went to the gym every

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Speaker 1: fucking day. But I was like, I was really focused

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Speaker 1: until I got into a relationship, a long distance one.

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Speaker 1: Then I moved back south, and then I got fat,

403
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Speaker 1: and then I almost went to prison. Just some fucking

404
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Speaker 1: domino effect. After that, I've got to another relationship.

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Speaker 2: Game are like, it's just listen life.

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Speaker 1: Yes, So I'm one of my suggestions if you are

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Speaker 1: in your or why where somebody would have told me was,

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Speaker 1: you know, keep your regrets to them. And I always

409
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:19,240
Speaker 1: say that get out of those relationships soon and early

410
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:21,760
Speaker 1: if they are not serving you. Do not stay around

411
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Speaker 1: now weight you can put on weight and happy relationships

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00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:27,600
Speaker 1: too now because y'all just eating and laying up.

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Speaker 2: That's what I'm doing with that.

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Speaker 1: That's always fun. But don't you know, don't forget right

415
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Speaker 1: because it is easier to lose weight in your twenties.

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Speaker 1: Ho do you get your metabolism slow down? Bit You

417
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Speaker 1: got to take all types of supplements and all type

418
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Speaker 1: of shit to get that. It's just something that's just

419
00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:53,400
Speaker 1: your body is changing. It's not the same and molecular

420
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,840
Speaker 1: you know, formation of all the things. It's just not

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Speaker 1: the same.

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Speaker 2: You know, one that I have. I wish somebody would

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Speaker 2: have told me at twenty five, or I would you know,

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Speaker 2: known at twenty five, y'all start putting money into an

425
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:17,680
Speaker 2: IRA now reality, because by the time you're retired, you

426
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 2: can have a million dollars waiting on you, a million

427
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:26,159
Speaker 2: dollars just by putting little, small amounts over time, you

428
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Speaker 2: can have so much money.

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Speaker 1: I mean I wish so, I mean, never mind twenty five,

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Speaker 1: like right now, like what are we doing to set

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Speaker 1: that up for now? Because I know I'm working on it.

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Speaker 1: But a lot of people, even our age right now,

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Speaker 1: aren't doing that because they still don't have the financial literacy.

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Speaker 1: So that is one part I wanted to get to

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Speaker 1: with the younger. I wish when I was younger, like

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Speaker 1: my mom never explained credit. She's always had good credit.

437
00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 1: She just she doesn't know how to make money off credit, right,

438
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:59,880
Speaker 1: she doesn't understand finance and av Yeah, she just knew

439
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,040
Speaker 1: you buy something, you got to pay for it, or

440
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:03,680
Speaker 1: you know, if you don't have the money, you can't

441
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:05,560
Speaker 1: get it. That's all she knew. But she's always had

442
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:08,120
Speaker 1: like an eight hundred sums credit score, but she never

443
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 1: passed that information down to her kids. All of us

444
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:14,200
Speaker 1: have had bad credit at some fucking point. Okay, I

445
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,719
Speaker 1: don't have credit out twice in life now.

446
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:19,680
Speaker 2: First of all, I am all kind of bills in

447
00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 2: my name. I wouldn't eight years old.

448
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 1: Oh that's another thing. Pull your credit report, depending on

449
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 1: who your mom is. Pull your credit report right now.

450
00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 1: If you've never pulled your credit report, and you're twenty

451
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:36,119
Speaker 1: five listening and we talk aback, pull your shit just

452
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:39,159
Speaker 1: in case there might be a default light built in

453
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 1: your name. Right. You don't got to get your mom arrested,

454
00:25:43,359 --> 00:25:46,120
Speaker 1: but you can dispute it today if you need help.

455
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:46,560
Speaker 1: DM me.

456
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:47,439
Speaker 2: Right.

457
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:54,119
Speaker 1: I remember my friend kid like when when I met him,

458
00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:56,320
Speaker 1: I might have been I probably was like twenty seven

459
00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 1: a time, and I've always been an adult though, you

460
00:25:58,640 --> 00:25:59,960
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, so, it's a lot of things

461
00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:03,119
Speaker 1: I feel like, ain't nobody never told me shit. My

462
00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,159
Speaker 1: mom ain't never told me nothing like anything. I know,

463
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:07,200
Speaker 1: I had to learn on my own for the most part.

464
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:12,200
Speaker 1: But I remember pulling his credit report. Now, his dad

465
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:16,879
Speaker 1: is uh African, so that would talk shit to him

466
00:26:16,880 --> 00:26:18,520
Speaker 1: about how you know, he's paying for him to go

467
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:20,399
Speaker 1: through go to school and all this shit. Man, I

468
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,360
Speaker 1: pull man that nigga has so much shit in his name,

469
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:26,200
Speaker 1: including them student loans. Your daddy't paying for nothing, boy.

470
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:30,480
Speaker 1: And I think a credit report was crazy. I mean,

471
00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:32,960
Speaker 1: like he had so much shit and had never put

472
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:36,000
Speaker 1: anything in his name. Wow, and had a whole credit profile.

473
00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:38,960
Speaker 1: So check your shit. Check your credit report today.

474
00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:45,040
Speaker 2: Oh my mama had somebody at one time using her credit,

475
00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:47,520
Speaker 2: but they was paying shit on time. It was so

476
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,080
Speaker 2: weird that her credit score was going up on shit that.

477
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:54,600
Speaker 1: She never had. Yeah, she probably just let somebody, I

478
00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:59,760
Speaker 1: mean essentially they build her credit for her basically.

479
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:00,840
Speaker 2: But she don't know who it was.

480
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 1: It was probably somebody probably sold her Social Security number

481
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:12,600
Speaker 1: as a CPN and that person was actually taking care

482
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:15,480
Speaker 1: of it, yeah, and not burning it out. You know.

483
00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:17,200
Speaker 1: All y'all about to go to jail for fraud, for

484
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:21,000
Speaker 1: burning out cpns and shit. But that might be what happened.

485
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:24,800
Speaker 1: Shit thinks it was wild. Let me open somebody uh

486
00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 1: hacked my shit? Because listen, I'm blaming everything on you.

487
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:31,320
Speaker 1: I never went to college. Whose student loans are.

488
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:33,000
Speaker 2: Those men I did college?

489
00:27:35,240 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 1: They had never been Please, I didn't. I don't know

490
00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:43,000
Speaker 1: who did that. I don't know this man. Yeah, so

491
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 1: let me think of anything else. I wish somebody would

492
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:52,320
Speaker 1: have told me at twenty five. Now, finances, I don't know.

493
00:27:52,400 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 1: Let's talk about men. Yeah, relationship relationships get out like

494
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:04,960
Speaker 1: I said, fast and soon, like don't wait for the

495
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 1: sixth flag.

496
00:28:06,800 --> 00:28:08,960
Speaker 2: Let me tell you that's one that I still ain't learned.

497
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:12,520
Speaker 2: My Listen, like I just be locked in, like I

498
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:16,080
Speaker 2: be like so in love I'll be once I get there.

499
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:19,399
Speaker 2: It's hard for me to let go. I still struggle now.

500
00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:21,560
Speaker 2: It take a lot for me to get there with somebody.

501
00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:24,080
Speaker 2: It'll take a whole lot for me to be like, oh,

502
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:25,679
Speaker 2: I love him and I really want to be with them,

503
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 2: and I'm gona claim them publicly. But once I get there,

504
00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:32,200
Speaker 2: I'm ready to go through hell and high warded with

505
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:33,600
Speaker 2: a motherfucker forever.

506
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,840
Speaker 1: I think also society makes women feel like we give

507
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:41,520
Speaker 1: up on relationships so easily, like we easily walk away,

508
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:43,680
Speaker 1: and it cannot be furthest from the truth. I think

509
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:47,720
Speaker 1: a lot of us stay in relationships hoping it gets better.

510
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:49,040
Speaker 2: You know.

511
00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:52,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, but man, I'm telling y'all, men are not gonna

512
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:54,560
Speaker 1: deal with half the shit they put you through, So

513
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:56,320
Speaker 1: just think about it. That is when you need to

514
00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:58,360
Speaker 1: think like a man. You need to think like a man.

515
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 1: When a man is doing some shit, you would he

516
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,120
Speaker 1: stay with you if you do the same thing to him,

517
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 1: because nine times out of ten, he's gonna beat your

518
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,120
Speaker 1: ass and then he out of there.

519
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 2: But sometimes, like if he cheating on if you cheat

520
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:14,680
Speaker 2: on him, some of these niggas be saying it just

521
00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:18,920
Speaker 2: be a secret. But then why you why did you

522
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:22,920
Speaker 2: smile like that? I just hurt. I just heard.

523
00:29:25,080 --> 00:29:27,000
Speaker 1: Like he ain't gonna never share with his homeboys that

524
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 1: you cheated on him before. Yeah, because he probably he

525
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:35,600
Speaker 1: probably subconsciously think you owe him that because he probably

526
00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:36,680
Speaker 1: not cheated on your ass.

527
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:39,960
Speaker 2: Or maybe maybe he's.

528
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:42,840
Speaker 1: Cheated worse than you ever known, you know. And I'm

529
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 1: not gonna say there's no relationships out here with women

530
00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:48,960
Speaker 1: then cheat first, third, and last. I am saying that

531
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:52,800
Speaker 1: because women be cheating for sure, we just don't get caught.

532
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 1: I feel like you really love your partner when you

533
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 1: don't get caught. Will you be leaving trash out for

534
00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:01,040
Speaker 1: people to step on and see, like dogs leave shit out?

535
00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:03,360
Speaker 1: You do not love the person you're with.

536
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:11,440
Speaker 2: You're because some people just not slick, you know. That's

537
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 2: what I said.

538
00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:14,920
Speaker 1: You need to be slick of you cheating, Yeah, you

539
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:15,400
Speaker 1: need to be.

540
00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 2: But everybody. I had one of my homegirls, she is

541
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:20,720
Speaker 2: the worst cheater in the world. Like, God, damn, you

542
00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 2: need to stop. You keep getting caught. I'm talking about

543
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,200
Speaker 2: every single time she get caught red handed. It's like

544
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:30,080
Speaker 2: she was caught with a nigga. It wouldn't be like Everdence,

545
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:34,360
Speaker 2: it'd be like with another nigga. Like every one time

546
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,800
Speaker 2: she got caught she called me. She's like, girl, my

547
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 2: man came and I had another thing at my house.

548
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:41,080
Speaker 2: I would to hit in the closet. I said, that's

549
00:30:41,120 --> 00:30:41,920
Speaker 2: your own house.

550
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 1: Bit I got a homegirl who her and the nigga

551
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 1: was under the bed. Bitch her baby daddy and I

552
00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 1: have broken the window of her apartment. He climbed up

553
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 1: to a second floor window and got inside her apartment,

554
00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 1: and her and the other nigga was underneath the bed

555
00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:07,960
Speaker 1: watching watching feet like a scary movie. They didn't get caught, no,

556
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:10,920
Speaker 1: he he naw he he never knew they were in

557
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:12,840
Speaker 1: there to this day.

558
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:15,560
Speaker 2: I mean, they ain't get to I don't play games

559
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:18,240
Speaker 2: like that because I know how I would act if

560
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:19,200
Speaker 2: I caught somebody.

561
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,720
Speaker 1: I might break out my house. You breaking my house,

562
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,760
Speaker 1: I'm flipping that shit on you with the nigga sitting

563
00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:29,160
Speaker 1: right there. How dare you breaking to my motherfucker house?

564
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 2: Can I tell you I'm a.

565
00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:34,800
Speaker 1: Gas like this ship that nigga? Why you going to jail?

566
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 2: Accountability? Fuck that.

567
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 1: I am not taking accountability for being on some motion

568
00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:45,000
Speaker 1: or you do broke in my house?

569
00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:48,760
Speaker 2: No, fuck you?

570
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 1: What are you doing here? Absolutely not? Uh? Reality versus potential. Okay,

571
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:01,760
Speaker 1: when you see this man and this is how he's presenting,

572
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,360
Speaker 1: believe him. Okay, Now I can tell you I was

573
00:32:05,560 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 1: in That's why I hate Columbia so much. I've had

574
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: some of my worst relationships in Columbia, South Carolina. Okay,

575
00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:16,080
Speaker 1: and one of my boyfriends I met him at the

576
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 1: gas station by the apartment where I lived at and

577
00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:20,680
Speaker 1: he was actually working at the gas station part time

578
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:26,680
Speaker 1: just so he can get gas money to drive to

579
00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:32,920
Speaker 1: Orangeburg for this Degel mechanics school. Right, So I saw

580
00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:36,400
Speaker 1: the potential. But this man had a whole fucking family.

581
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:38,840
Speaker 1: Dawn there stole with the family. He's still with his

582
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 1: baby mama to this day. Okay, his kid's grown his

583
00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:47,560
Speaker 1: hair now. But I was I saw. I don't know.

584
00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:49,920
Speaker 1: I think women we be so delusional, like we be

585
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:53,120
Speaker 1: seeing a future with every fucking body. He was such

586
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:56,080
Speaker 1: a hard worker, like, yes, you can see the potential

587
00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:57,440
Speaker 1: and where he's going to be at in the future

588
00:32:57,440 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 1: because he does well now, right, And I saw that

589
00:32:59,640 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaker 1: then mm hmm. But he was on some bullshit like

590
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:05,760
Speaker 1: he always gonna be a lover boy like his baby

591
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:07,560
Speaker 1: mama gonna always have to deal with him fucking other

592
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:12,800
Speaker 1: bitches like forever. And I knew that then, well no more.

593
00:33:13,880 --> 00:33:14,800
Speaker 2: I got up out of there.

594
00:33:14,880 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 1: But y'all, it was two tup pregnancies later, the baby

595
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:21,920
Speaker 1: mam was pregnant the second time I was pregnant at

596
00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:24,440
Speaker 1: the same time. It was a whole lot of bullshit,

597
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:29,200
Speaker 1: and my twenties middle finger to my old life. Don't

598
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,000
Speaker 1: go through it the minute of a bitch call you

599
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 1: a phone. I remember this girl calling my phone. I'm

600
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 1: at work. She like, who are you there? So and so?

601
00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 1: I said, who did he say? I am? I said,

602
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: you calling me? You should ask him? And furthermore, why

603
00:33:41,680 --> 00:33:43,640
Speaker 1: are you going through his phone? That's my favorite shit

604
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:47,160
Speaker 1: to tell a bitch when they call me. Why are

605
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 1: you on his phone? And if you got a check

606
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:51,920
Speaker 1: for me, you already know what time it is? Like,

607
00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 1: I'm not, but yeah, asked that man. Okay.

608
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:57,760
Speaker 2: I remember I had a girl post my picture on

609
00:33:57,880 --> 00:34:02,040
Speaker 2: social media, her nigga that I ain't even never met

610
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 2: in real life. He was just in the DMS and

611
00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 2: they were on vacation, and he was like mesicaging me

612
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 2: while they were on vacation because they were arguing about

613
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:14,320
Speaker 2: something I didn't I didn't know none of this. And

614
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:17,720
Speaker 2: then I wake up in the morning and I'm tagged.

615
00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:19,560
Speaker 2: It's some bullshit.

616
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:22,239
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm the fuck I don't even know this

617
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:27,640
Speaker 1: nigga like that, Relax? Why are you ruin a vacation girl?

618
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:31,560
Speaker 2: That's why I listen how I always tell my clients

619
00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:35,120
Speaker 2: and homegirls, like, don't ruin your own vacation on some

620
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:37,879
Speaker 2: bullshit going through Why would you go through a nigga

621
00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:40,600
Speaker 2: phone on vacation, like you want to have.

622
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:41,319
Speaker 1: A bad time?

623
00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:43,760
Speaker 2: You asked me for bullshit.

624
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:47,880
Speaker 1: Basically, I had a nigga go through my phone on Christmas, Like,

625
00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:49,800
Speaker 1: what the fuck nigga?

626
00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:52,719
Speaker 2: You want to ruin Chris Christmas.

627
00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:54,480
Speaker 1: And New Year's at this point, because fuck you, you

628
00:34:54,719 --> 00:34:56,040
Speaker 1: ain't going intobody New Years?

629
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 2: Why are you and my damn cell phone? Anytime a

630
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,919
Speaker 2: nigga through my phone, I was flabb against it because

631
00:35:01,920 --> 00:35:06,960
Speaker 2: I thought only women did that. I was lie, it's

632
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 2: not they do it.

633
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:13,480
Speaker 1: They go through I'm gonna tell y'all, men go through

634
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: women's phones. Ain't it been a time I've ever been in,

635
00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: like in a real serious relationship with a man that

636
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:20,360
Speaker 1: I don't pick my phone up in my settings and

637
00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:22,440
Speaker 1: is different in all type of shit weird in my

638
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:24,800
Speaker 1: cell phone because I know you've been in there fiddling

639
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:26,439
Speaker 1: around doing some shit.

640
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you see, I wasn't even covering my tracks

641
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:33,880
Speaker 2: because I just thought niggas just did not do that.

642
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:37,640
Speaker 2: Wrong Again, I never.

643
00:35:38,320 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 1: Even up until the point to where a man actually

644
00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:46,479
Speaker 1: did it. I still covered my tracks just in case

645
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 1: my mind, I don't want ship past nobody.

646
00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:55,280
Speaker 2: I definitely thought niggas was too thorough for that. Now absolutely,

647
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:59,040
Speaker 2: Now you know how you can lock everything? My photos

648
00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:02,719
Speaker 2: is face. I d everything you can't get in ship

649
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 2: without my face.

650
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:05,319
Speaker 1: Don't see it too hard.

651
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:09,000
Speaker 2: You can't get that, right, That would be the only

652
00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:10,720
Speaker 2: way you have to do it. In my sleep.

653
00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't set up none of that biometric shit

654
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:15,440
Speaker 1: on my cell phone. Like you got to use a pin.

655
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:16,400
Speaker 2: I'm not.

656
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:21,279
Speaker 1: It's not no face, none of that. You got to

657
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:25,160
Speaker 1: put the pin in. And my ship long too, it's

658
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:30,240
Speaker 1: nine characters. You'll never hear it out. You'll never get nine.

659
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:34,399
Speaker 1: So and then even when you do, like the little

660
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:36,600
Speaker 1: cold on the phone, people can look and see like

661
00:36:37,040 --> 00:36:40,840
Speaker 1: how your friends, Yeah, the fingerprints on your phone. So

662
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,439
Speaker 1: I don't do that either. Yeah, and I don't even

663
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:46,239
Speaker 1: I don't think. I don't have nothing to hide now,

664
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 1: got no, But I just still keep it locked. Yeah,

665
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:54,680
Speaker 1: I don't know. I guess what relationships. Yeah, just get

666
00:36:54,680 --> 00:36:57,160
Speaker 1: out of there soon and early. Your mama is right.

667
00:36:57,680 --> 00:37:00,400
Speaker 1: These niggas ain't ship. They just want to see your asshole.

668
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:03,160
Speaker 1: And once they do they out of there? Okay, there's

669
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:06,880
Speaker 1: only two men that really love you. Is it your daddy? Okay?

670
00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:09,319
Speaker 1: I mean the two No, two men that actually want

671
00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:11,680
Speaker 1: to be around you, your daddy and the man that

672
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:14,520
Speaker 1: truly loves you. The rest of these men they only

673
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,040
Speaker 1: around until they have sex with you.

674
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:17,200
Speaker 2: Just know that.

675
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:20,719
Speaker 1: They gonna chase you until they get to Kuchi and

676
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:22,120
Speaker 1: all of a sudden you chasing them.

677
00:37:23,160 --> 00:37:26,040
Speaker 2: Oh, I have one that a lot of you women

678
00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:32,400
Speaker 2: and men need to hear. Guess what, Sometimes you're wrong.

679
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:37,479
Speaker 2: Sometimes you're not right. You can't be right every single time.

680
00:37:37,680 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 2: Sometimes you are the wrong person. And if you are

681
00:37:40,840 --> 00:37:44,320
Speaker 2: listening and think every time you are right, you probably

682
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:49,439
Speaker 2: wrong more times than not. There's no way you're always right.

683
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:52,279
Speaker 2: So sometimes you have to be like, Okay, like, maybe

684
00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:56,040
Speaker 2: I should think about this more objectively instead of just

685
00:37:56,160 --> 00:37:57,320
Speaker 2: from my own perspective.

686
00:37:58,200 --> 00:37:59,839
Speaker 1: Right, try that shit.

687
00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:03,719
Speaker 2: I had to learn that one. I had to learn

688
00:38:03,800 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 2: that one. I just remember, like in my twenties, I

689
00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:09,759
Speaker 2: was definitely how I think is right and that's the

690
00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:13,800
Speaker 2: only right way, and it just felt like it was

691
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:16,640
Speaker 2: supposed to make sense what I thought to everybody else.

692
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:24,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I feel like perspective and just saying

693
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 1: the word perspective is ten years old, right, People didn't

694
00:38:31,960 --> 00:38:37,160
Speaker 1: even consider other people's perspective about something, you know, I

695
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:39,279
Speaker 1: don't know personally, I don't be talking about shit I

696
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:41,239
Speaker 1: don't know about. And then if somebody's telling me some

697
00:38:41,320 --> 00:38:43,920
Speaker 1: shit I never heard and I'm listening, I'm never just

698
00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:46,440
Speaker 1: telling them or that's not I don't that's not right.

699
00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:49,359
Speaker 1: I don't do that. I'd be like, okay, and then

700
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:51,640
Speaker 1: I'll go through my own little independent research and see

701
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:54,920
Speaker 1: what the fuck they're talking about. But yeah, you absolutely

702
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:57,839
Speaker 1: don't know everything. Nobody knows everything, and the smartest person

703
00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 1: knows they know nothing. Right, Actually, all right, she should

704
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:05,000
Speaker 1: always be a student. Yeah, listen to your damn mama.

705
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:07,320
Speaker 1: Your mom already said that, right. Listen to your mama

706
00:39:07,560 --> 00:39:10,279
Speaker 1: mom already right. The ship you think you are going through,

707
00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:13,640
Speaker 1: she's already been through it, all right, So old any anytime,

708
00:39:13,880 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: if you're twenty five, right now, anytime, anybody who's older

709
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:20,279
Speaker 1: than you tell you some ship, Okay, they are telling

710
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:22,560
Speaker 1: you it from from experience of.

711
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:29,399
Speaker 2: The bitters hell. No, you have been in the room

712
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:34,920
Speaker 2: for the old ship, beauty salon.

713
00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:38,120
Speaker 1: I've been looking for this lady who used to Missy Vaughn.

714
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:39,920
Speaker 1: I've been looking for her man to see if she

715
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:41,920
Speaker 1: could she could do my hair because I used to

716
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:45,240
Speaker 1: go to her as a kid. But yeah, that fucking

717
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:50,160
Speaker 1: beauty salon was so caddy and some of the conversations

718
00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 1: that should not have been had in front of little girls,

719
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:57,880
Speaker 1: right and had in hair salon. Everybody husband was cheating

720
00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:02,000
Speaker 1: chat so still, I mean, I guess it, hoping it, George,

721
00:40:02,120 --> 00:40:04,800
Speaker 1: you know, I'm talking about other partners where.

722
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 2: And ke Lo Low came to the beating and they

723
00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 2: was telling everybody about how their husbands was out here

724
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:19,960
Speaker 2: cheating on everybody. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yes, yeah.

725
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:29,920
Speaker 1: Another thing I think that we take for granted. It's time. Right.

726
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 1: So my oldest niece is twenty five. My youngest niece

727
00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:37,440
Speaker 1: now is she's twenty she's twenty? Is she twenty one?

728
00:40:37,560 --> 00:40:41,160
Speaker 1: Yet she's twenty at twenty one? Anyway, second year of college,

729
00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:45,799
Speaker 1: and I remember for my youngest niece, I remember having

730
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,799
Speaker 1: a conversation with her maybe when she was in her

731
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:50,720
Speaker 1: eleventh grade year, just trying to talk about the future,

732
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:54,720
Speaker 1: because nobody did that for me, right, Nobody like helped

733
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,879
Speaker 1: me think about what I'm gonna do when I finish

734
00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:01,879
Speaker 1: high school, because shit gets real. Once she finished high school, right,

735
00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:03,719
Speaker 1: you can go to college, you can go straight to

736
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 1: the workforce. You start getting making money and acquiring bills

737
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 1: and credit fucked, all types of things start happening. She

738
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:15,840
Speaker 1: gets real really fast. When you are becoming an adult

739
00:41:16,120 --> 00:41:19,480
Speaker 1: in twenty five, you are still a child. Okay, So

740
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:22,719
Speaker 1: a lot of the shit I was telling both of

741
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:26,600
Speaker 1: my nieces they are now having to experience. I would

742
00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:28,479
Speaker 1: have my oldest niece, I have been telling her since

743
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:32,279
Speaker 1: she was a kid, all these niggas gay, and she

744
00:41:32,400 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 1: did not believe me until now when she's twenty eight

745
00:41:35,239 --> 00:41:37,759
Speaker 1: years old. And then my youngest niece, like, yeah, I

746
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:40,120
Speaker 1: remember sitting the call with her trying to everybody, trying

747
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: to tell you what to do with my life. This

748
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:44,680
Speaker 1: is what she told me, like in eleventh grade. And

749
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:47,680
Speaker 1: now she is trying to figure it out. You know,

750
00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:50,359
Speaker 1: the first two years of school didn't work out as

751
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:53,040
Speaker 1: she plans. She now she has to come back home

752
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:55,520
Speaker 1: and do tech for a little while to get her

753
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 1: grades back up. Because you have to have a different

754
00:41:58,200 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 1: level of discipline right now once you get into the

755
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:03,080
Speaker 1: real world, because there's nobody there to wake you up

756
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:05,440
Speaker 1: and make sure you're on your shit. You have to

757
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 1: be self motivating, right, so.

758
00:42:09,880 --> 00:42:10,400
Speaker 2: Work on that.

759
00:42:10,640 --> 00:42:13,480
Speaker 1: Work on your mind, like listen, read something like now

760
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:16,400
Speaker 1: we're getting more into like the self help books and

761
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:20,320
Speaker 1: meditation and all that stuff at this age. But imagine

762
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 1: if we was on this type of time at twenty

763
00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:25,360
Speaker 1: twenty five, like your mind would be really really super

764
00:42:25,480 --> 00:42:30,600
Speaker 1: duper fortified, like it wasn't until age thirty three. For me,

765
00:42:30,800 --> 00:42:33,640
Speaker 1: that's like thirty two is when shit started getting bad

766
00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:38,400
Speaker 1: and going downhill, and thirty three, I feel like, and

767
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 1: then just the time and not like in the rat

768
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:42,440
Speaker 1: race of having to work with somebody else. I was

769
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:44,399
Speaker 1: able to do a lot of research. I was able

770
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:47,319
Speaker 1: to read, I had time to think. I had time

771
00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:50,920
Speaker 1: to actually figure out what is actually going on in

772
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,759
Speaker 1: the world. But the old, the younger you can do that,

773
00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 1: the more advanced you will be. You know, thirty five, Yeah,

774
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:02,920
Speaker 1: so read, nigga, figure out what is going on in

775
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:06,759
Speaker 1: the world for real. I don't know, start therapy now,

776
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:08,680
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like it's a lot of

777
00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:13,240
Speaker 1: stuff that we probably blame on childhood that we probably

778
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 1: could have you know, had somebody help us resolve by

779
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:22,279
Speaker 1: there on. Yeah, because it comes out and dating, Okay, it.

780
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 2: Comes out, and how you present yourself to the world every.

781
00:43:24,960 --> 00:43:31,319
Speaker 1: Day, friendship, all that shit, and you don't have as

782
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 1: much time as you think. That is the whole gist

783
00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:36,400
Speaker 1: of what I was trying to say. Yes, you're twenty

784
00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:40,080
Speaker 1: five right now, but ten years goes by so fast.

785
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 1: I was just telling the nigga the other day, like,

786
00:43:43,640 --> 00:43:46,279
Speaker 1: we're gonna be fifty soon. You know, you around here

787
00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:50,279
Speaker 1: bum fumbling and bullshitting. You want to be fifty doing

788
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:52,560
Speaker 1: the same thing you're doing today if you do not

789
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,799
Speaker 1: make a change today. So, if you're twenty five right now,

790
00:43:55,840 --> 00:43:58,800
Speaker 1: I think you got time because you're young and lit. Babe.

791
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 1: Everything you look up right now is add a baby

792
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:07,239
Speaker 1: to your bullshit, right Okay? So yeah, if you single, young,

793
00:44:07,360 --> 00:44:08,480
Speaker 1: let no kids, you good.

794
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:13,840
Speaker 2: Mm hmm as soon as you become a mama. But

795
00:44:14,000 --> 00:44:16,960
Speaker 2: let me tell you them, mamas be turning into superheroes though.

796
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 2: Sometimes so mm hmm.

797
00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel like I don't have as much hustle

798
00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:24,359
Speaker 1: as I should because I don't have no kids.

799
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:27,399
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, me too. Sometimes I lay in the bed

800
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:29,360
Speaker 2: and people be going to pick their kids up from daycare.

801
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:37,719
Speaker 2: I'd be like, damn, that's crazy. I got another good

802
00:44:37,760 --> 00:44:41,960
Speaker 2: one pertaining to finances. Don't spend your money trying to

803
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:46,000
Speaker 2: keep up with a lifestyle or a look that is

804
00:44:46,120 --> 00:44:50,080
Speaker 2: really outside your means. Stop wasting money on dumb ass

805
00:44:50,080 --> 00:44:53,279
Speaker 2: shit like that, like you buying a Chanelle bag but

806
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:56,040
Speaker 2: it ain't got no real mattress on your bed, you know, like,

807
00:44:57,239 --> 00:44:59,160
Speaker 2: or you don't have the means to pay your rent

808
00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 2: by yourself, but the money you're getting you spending on

809
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:05,239
Speaker 2: clothes and shoes and bags and can't put no money

810
00:45:05,320 --> 00:45:08,000
Speaker 2: in the bag. And if this person is taking care

811
00:45:08,040 --> 00:45:11,200
Speaker 2: of you decides to stop, now, you're gonna get evicted.

812
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:13,919
Speaker 2: Don't do dummit. I've seen that shit happen before.

813
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:17,359
Speaker 1: I mean, we got grown ass women that's still doing

814
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:21,359
Speaker 1: stuff like that. But yeah, like definitely. I mean there's

815
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:26,320
Speaker 1: so much like financial literacy, like help shit on YouTube.

816
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 1: Check out some of those videos. Learn about the stock

817
00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:34,000
Speaker 1: market right now, like Tammy mentioned earlier about you know,

818
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 1: doing a IRA stuff like that, annuities.

819
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:39,400
Speaker 2: Put a couple of dollars, you.

820
00:45:39,560 --> 00:45:43,279
Speaker 1: Have the money, Okay, I can assure you I had

821
00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:47,280
Speaker 1: way more money in my twenties than I do do now, okay.

822
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:52,200
Speaker 1: And I did not save save your money. But I

823
00:45:52,239 --> 00:45:54,959
Speaker 1: don't even think a whole bunch of bullshit, bitch.

824
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:58,479
Speaker 2: When I was living in Europe, I was balling hand

825
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:04,960
Speaker 2: like ball okay, And I was just blowing money like you.

826
00:46:05,120 --> 00:46:07,040
Speaker 2: I was blowing money like I was a drug dealer,

827
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:11,280
Speaker 2: straight up. Like oh, we just were flying the Amsterdam

828
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 2: is we can we going crazy? And I just spent

829
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:18,759
Speaker 2: thousands and thousands of dollars on bullshit. I can't. I

830
00:46:18,840 --> 00:46:21,000
Speaker 2: can't show food none of that shit, now, you know.

831
00:46:21,640 --> 00:46:24,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you will. That is another thing. You're looking

832
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:26,600
Speaker 1: back on skinny pictures. You're gonna be looking back on

833
00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:30,520
Speaker 1: the money you had your hands on that you don't

834
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:34,120
Speaker 1: have now. You did absolutely nothing with You're not by

835
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:36,600
Speaker 1: that money. You just all this money going out and

836
00:46:36,719 --> 00:46:39,840
Speaker 1: nothing coming in, nothing extra coming in.

837
00:46:40,160 --> 00:46:43,520
Speaker 2: Now. What I'm not saying, don't make memories and experiences,

838
00:46:44,120 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 2: but just balance, you know, absolutely.

839
00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:51,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, have fun, you know what I'm saying. If you

840
00:46:51,840 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 1: can find a man who was sponsored, that's your fun.

841
00:46:57,280 --> 00:46:57,920
Speaker 1: Do that too.

842
00:46:58,440 --> 00:47:01,879
Speaker 2: Let applies age. Yeah.

843
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:04,399
Speaker 1: I also don't spend too much time trying to look

844
00:47:04,440 --> 00:47:07,239
Speaker 1: for somebody to find it to finance your fucking life.

845
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:09,759
Speaker 1: Make sure you're the nigga with the money, right, okay,

846
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:12,840
Speaker 1: because I'm unfortunately learning realizing that I'm gonna just have

847
00:47:12,920 --> 00:47:14,479
Speaker 1: to be the nigga with the money of my life.

848
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:18,080
Speaker 1: Shouldn't you that I don't, not that I don't, not

849
00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:21,000
Speaker 1: that it's not any men out here with the money, man,

850
00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:22,800
Speaker 1: but it's really not a whole bunch of them to

851
00:47:22,880 --> 00:47:23,280
Speaker 1: go around.

852
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:27,520
Speaker 2: Remember that nigga that side said I was gonna marry

853
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:29,920
Speaker 2: rich bitch, you lie?

854
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:32,640
Speaker 1: Well, he ain't lie to me because he told me

855
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:34,440
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to work hard. I'm gonna get everything

856
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,480
Speaker 1: I want. I'm gonna just have to work hard, and

857
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:38,680
Speaker 1: that is and I already knew that, right. So it's

858
00:47:38,719 --> 00:47:42,160
Speaker 1: just confirmation for me for real, because that is the

859
00:47:42,239 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 1: story of my fucking life. So I just got to

860
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:49,000
Speaker 1: get out of my my own way. Basically, he told

861
00:47:49,080 --> 00:47:51,200
Speaker 1: you you was gonna marry a basketball player, bitch, because

862
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:54,560
Speaker 1: but you're probably looking for Drea and Michael Age nigga,

863
00:47:54,640 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 1: like your niggas retired, I want I don't want.

864
00:47:57,360 --> 00:48:00,560
Speaker 2: To know young niggas no more. I'm doing with y'all.

865
00:48:00,600 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 2: Got me fat lions got me fat this episode, The

866
00:48:11,719 --> 00:48:13,240
Speaker 2: Lions got me fat.

867
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:19,799
Speaker 1: Let's talk about friendships right quick, right, because I am

868
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:22,360
Speaker 1: no longer friends with a few people who who I

869
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:24,600
Speaker 1: was friends with, like in my twenties.

870
00:48:25,080 --> 00:48:28,080
Speaker 2: Absolutely, and I thought that it would never I was.

871
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: I thought that these people would be my friends forever life, right, Yeah,

872
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:34,279
Speaker 1: And it's just it doesn't work that way.

873
00:48:34,320 --> 00:48:34,440
Speaker 2: Now.

874
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 1: What I don't believe in is people growing apart. I'm

875
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:41,719
Speaker 1: not my relationships. It wasn't about people growing apart. It's

876
00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:45,279
Speaker 1: just somebody starting like a bitch. Okay, it ain't no

877
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:48,319
Speaker 1: growing apart. Once you get a certain age, you.

878
00:48:48,400 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 2: Don't feel like that. No, I feel like you can

879
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 2: because I have some friends that are still very good

880
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:57,760
Speaker 2: friends of mine, but we don't talk as often because

881
00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:59,080
Speaker 2: just distance in life.

882
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:01,520
Speaker 1: You know, like those are your those probably your best

883
00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:03,480
Speaker 1: friends though you know what I'm saying, Like those probably

884
00:49:03,960 --> 00:49:06,520
Speaker 1: when y'all do talk, y'all probably talked for a long time, Yeah,

885
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:11,520
Speaker 1: about relationships that ended, Like you no longer talk to

886
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:12,040
Speaker 1: this person.

887
00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 2: I you know what, I used to think that I

888
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 2: had to hold on too friendships that I've had for

889
00:49:19,080 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 2: a long time. That's another one, like you just because

890
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:26,560
Speaker 2: you've been friends with someone for a long time, don't

891
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:29,560
Speaker 2: mean y'all have to be friends forever. Sometimes that chapter

892
00:49:29,719 --> 00:49:32,520
Speaker 2: is done and that's okay. You know you're holding onto

893
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:36,120
Speaker 2: unhealthy relationships because y'all known each other since y'all was fourteen.

894
00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:39,920
Speaker 2: Fuck that. Let that shit go. It don't matter. Sometimes

895
00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:43,160
Speaker 2: it's just okay. Your piece is more important if you

896
00:49:43,280 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 2: got girlfriends that y'all always arguing every time y'all talk

897
00:49:47,320 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 2: is discourse, Like, just let that shit go. It's okay,

898
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:55,200
Speaker 2: and you can still love them and wish them well.

899
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:58,759
Speaker 2: And I have nothing to do with them. Yeah.

900
00:49:58,920 --> 00:50:01,600
Speaker 1: My mom asked me about one of my ex best

901
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:06,560
Speaker 1: friends over the weekend, and I get so annoyed when

902
00:50:06,600 --> 00:50:06,960
Speaker 1: she does.

903
00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:09,400
Speaker 2: I I.

904
00:50:11,480 --> 00:50:13,920
Speaker 1: Get so annoyed when she does, because it's almost like,

905
00:50:14,120 --> 00:50:15,840
Speaker 1: did you forget what these people did to me?

906
00:50:16,680 --> 00:50:19,520
Speaker 3: And it's almost like ever with my daughter and my

907
00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:22,600
Speaker 3: kids said such and such, such and such, bitch, I

908
00:50:22,640 --> 00:50:25,479
Speaker 3: ain't your friend no more either. Yeah, but I guess

909
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:27,880
Speaker 3: she and I mean this, this particular person, she's like

910
00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:29,800
Speaker 3: a family member who I just don't fuck with, Like

911
00:50:29,880 --> 00:50:31,560
Speaker 3: she's a family member who I don't talk to no

912
00:50:31,640 --> 00:50:37,600
Speaker 3: more so, And we were friends from middle school basically

913
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,759
Speaker 3: a very very long time. And you know, I feel

914
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:44,239
Speaker 3: like I was in some abusive friendships the same, Like

915
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 3: it's just a different type of abuse, because like she

916
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:49,239
Speaker 3: would be mad at a mad at a boyfriend and

917
00:50:49,280 --> 00:50:51,080
Speaker 3: then all of a sudden, like you got an attitude,

918
00:50:51,120 --> 00:50:54,239
Speaker 3: I mean, the nastiest attitude towards me, Like why I

919
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:54,880
Speaker 3: gotta deal with it.

920
00:50:54,920 --> 00:50:57,760
Speaker 1: Anytime I'm pissed at somebody, that energy goes towards that person.

921
00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:00,600
Speaker 1: Only I'm not taking it out on somebody else, especially

922
00:51:00,680 --> 00:51:02,640
Speaker 1: my homegirl. Like your friends are there to make you

923
00:51:02,840 --> 00:51:05,360
Speaker 1: happy when these niggas make you mad, right, but you

924
00:51:05,640 --> 00:51:08,279
Speaker 1: mad at me when you mad at you know, it's

925
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:11,200
Speaker 1: just it's weird. And some of those relationships you realize

926
00:51:11,239 --> 00:51:14,480
Speaker 1: once they do end, y'all probably were never really friends.

927
00:51:14,960 --> 00:51:18,680
Speaker 1: You know. Sometimes it's really really one sided. Also, like

928
00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:21,799
Speaker 1: somebody is benefiting more off that friendship than the other.

929
00:51:22,120 --> 00:51:25,759
Speaker 2: One of my friends got mad at me because I

930
00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:30,520
Speaker 2: was going through another filled situationship that didn't turn into

931
00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:33,000
Speaker 2: a relationship and I was really upset about it, and

932
00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:35,480
Speaker 2: she was like, you know, just trying to be encouraging.

933
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:38,360
Speaker 2: The right person is going to come along. You just

934
00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:41,560
Speaker 2: gotta not whatever bitch you say to always make each

935
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 2: other feel better. And I was like, you know what,

936
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:46,960
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but I really don't want to hear that

937
00:51:47,080 --> 00:51:50,719
Speaker 2: motherfucking shit right now, right And she was upset that

938
00:51:50,800 --> 00:51:52,880
Speaker 2: I said that to her, because she said that she

939
00:51:53,040 --> 00:51:58,239
Speaker 2: was just trying to encourage me and make me feel better.

940
00:51:59,239 --> 00:52:03,719
Speaker 2: But sometimes it's okay to say, you know what, I

941
00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:06,480
Speaker 2: don't want to hear that shit right now? Do you

942
00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:07,200
Speaker 2: think I was wrong?

943
00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:12,240
Speaker 1: I mean, were you venting to her? And so sometimes

944
00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:13,879
Speaker 1: you got to tell people you just want to air

945
00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:16,960
Speaker 1: you really don't want anything from them, right You just

946
00:52:17,040 --> 00:52:20,000
Speaker 1: want them to listen. Because if you are calling her

947
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:22,480
Speaker 1: and you just you know, telling them all these all

948
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:24,239
Speaker 1: the bad shit that's been happening with you in the

949
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:27,799
Speaker 1: relationship and all that shit, and they offer words of encouragement,

950
00:52:28,080 --> 00:52:31,760
Speaker 1: why would you ever get upset about words of encouragement?

951
00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:35,040
Speaker 2: Well I did. I wasn't upset with her about the

952
00:52:35,600 --> 00:52:36,840
Speaker 2: encouragement I wouldn't like.

953
00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:39,920
Speaker 1: But the way it came off, she took it personally.

954
00:52:40,239 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 1: She took it I don't want to hear that shit

955
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:42,400
Speaker 1: right now?

956
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:45,919
Speaker 2: Like why the energy for me? Yeah? But it wasn't

957
00:52:46,560 --> 00:52:48,879
Speaker 2: shit this friend would do to me. But it wasn't

958
00:52:49,040 --> 00:52:52,319
Speaker 2: energy for her, that's the thing. It wasn't energy for her.

959
00:52:52,800 --> 00:52:55,399
Speaker 2: But it's like, after twenty years, a bitch just saying

960
00:52:55,920 --> 00:52:59,279
Speaker 2: the right person coming Like girls, don't nobody want to

961
00:52:59,320 --> 00:52:59,520
Speaker 2: hear that?

962
00:53:00,320 --> 00:53:00,560
Speaker 1: Ship?

963
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:05,360
Speaker 2: Yeah I heard it before.

964
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 1: You're gonna get mad at her because you keep going

965
00:53:09,360 --> 00:53:10,440
Speaker 1: through the niggas.

966
00:53:13,360 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 2: With that, but you stop about the right person to

967
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,000
Speaker 2: cover the long girl fuck up.

968
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 1: Oh you would have felt better. She would have said, bitch,

969
00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:24,000
Speaker 1: steady yourself for a little while, stop dating bitch. That

970
00:53:24,360 --> 00:53:31,279
Speaker 1: made me feel better anyway, you know, get with the plan. Okay,

971
00:53:31,400 --> 00:53:33,400
Speaker 1: So if you if you are in your twenties and

972
00:53:33,440 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 1: you got a friend like betting you about her relationships,

973
00:53:36,719 --> 00:53:37,120
Speaker 1: just listen.

974
00:53:37,560 --> 00:53:37,799
Speaker 2: Okay.

975
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:41,880
Speaker 1: You always have to give your opinion about stuff, right listen.

976
00:53:42,040 --> 00:53:44,200
Speaker 1: And I don't even think I used to be giving

977
00:53:44,239 --> 00:53:47,120
Speaker 1: this bitch my opinion about ship. Like literally, she would

978
00:53:47,120 --> 00:53:49,880
Speaker 1: be giving her opinion to me about my niggas and

979
00:53:50,000 --> 00:53:52,400
Speaker 1: one of my niggas she enough, fucking I think I

980
00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:55,839
Speaker 1: don't know about it today. Okay, Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

981
00:53:56,000 --> 00:53:59,480
Speaker 1: So just listen. Not all you will not be friends

982
00:53:59,520 --> 00:54:02,920
Speaker 1: with all your friends forever right and will feel like

983
00:54:02,960 --> 00:54:07,319
Speaker 1: a real breakup. It will hurt, and you gonna live

984
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 1: and you're gonna make more friends. Okay, I don't. I've

985
00:54:10,160 --> 00:54:11,760
Speaker 1: never had a problem making friends.

986
00:54:12,280 --> 00:54:15,200
Speaker 2: I always I try to always, especially in the you know,

987
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:19,399
Speaker 2: last decade, anytime I unpack on friends, I always ask

988
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:24,600
Speaker 2: them first, do if they have the bandwidth for you know,

989
00:54:24,840 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 2: I always ask, hey, can you handle you know, me

990
00:54:28,320 --> 00:54:30,360
Speaker 2: venting to you right now. I try to do that

991
00:54:30,440 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 2: because some people would just come dump on you without

992
00:54:32,719 --> 00:54:35,319
Speaker 2: even asking if it's okay to do that. I think

993
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:38,719
Speaker 2: that's something that we should start, you know, putting into

994
00:54:38,800 --> 00:54:42,440
Speaker 2: our repertoire when we're talking to our friends, like ask first,

995
00:54:42,680 --> 00:54:45,680
Speaker 2: don't just come drop. And you know your friends are

996
00:54:46,000 --> 00:54:47,800
Speaker 2: I mean, what are friends for? They're there for that,

997
00:54:48,080 --> 00:54:50,960
Speaker 2: but you gotta also consider that it might be more

998
00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:53,560
Speaker 2: than they can handle at that time, you know. And

999
00:54:53,640 --> 00:54:58,799
Speaker 2: then also tell your friends I just want you to listen.

1000
00:54:59,600 --> 00:55:03,080
Speaker 2: I don't advice, and that's okay too.

1001
00:55:03,920 --> 00:55:07,759
Speaker 1: You know. Also tell your friends good things about your relationship.

1002
00:55:07,880 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 1: You don't want to just be like dumping all the

1003
00:55:09,600 --> 00:55:11,719
Speaker 1: trauma and all the bad shit on them, Like there

1004
00:55:11,800 --> 00:55:13,560
Speaker 1: are some good times. I think you can think of.

1005
00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:15,920
Speaker 1: If you can't think of any good good times in

1006
00:55:16,000 --> 00:55:18,320
Speaker 1: that relationship, get out of there. But you know, you

1007
00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:20,239
Speaker 1: don't always want to just come to your friends with

1008
00:55:20,280 --> 00:55:22,440
Speaker 1: the bad shit, because your friends are not going to

1009
00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:26,360
Speaker 1: fuck with your person anymore. I just gonna thank you

1010
00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:28,920
Speaker 1: making bad decisions and eventually they ain't gonna want to

1011
00:55:28,920 --> 00:55:30,880
Speaker 1: hear that shit. I rembvi used to be venting so

1012
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:32,680
Speaker 1: much to one of my homegirls who I'm no longer

1013
00:55:32,719 --> 00:55:37,240
Speaker 1: friends with. I used to be venting her about about

1014
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:42,279
Speaker 1: my ex what am my exes? And then I stopped, right,

1015
00:55:42,400 --> 00:55:44,200
Speaker 1: I stopped vitting her because I'm like, you know what,

1016
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:46,919
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just stop bending everybody ears about this nigga

1017
00:55:46,960 --> 00:55:49,040
Speaker 1: and Tom I'm ready to leave for real. But that

1018
00:55:49,239 --> 00:55:51,880
Speaker 1: was my way of, you know, talking myself out of

1019
00:55:51,920 --> 00:55:55,319
Speaker 1: the relationship anyway, right, But then when I would talk

1020
00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:58,520
Speaker 1: to her, she would be asking me about what's going

1021
00:55:58,719 --> 00:56:01,560
Speaker 1: like when I stop mentioning, she would then be asking.

1022
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:06,080
Speaker 1: But then the reason why I stopped even mentioning is

1023
00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:09,400
Speaker 1: because she was like getting short with me during conversation

1024
00:56:09,560 --> 00:56:12,120
Speaker 1: about it, like she was tired of hearing about it, right,

1025
00:56:12,200 --> 00:56:14,600
Speaker 1: So I stopped talking about it. And now you're asking

1026
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:17,000
Speaker 1: me about the nigga. Like, I'm not even mentioning this nigga.

1027
00:56:17,040 --> 00:56:19,239
Speaker 1: Don't ask me about him right now?

1028
00:56:19,480 --> 00:56:21,319
Speaker 2: Like which one is it? Because when I am talking

1029
00:56:21,320 --> 00:56:22,960
Speaker 2: about it, you don't want to hear it. And when

1030
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:25,239
Speaker 2: I stopped, now you're wondering why I stop?

1031
00:56:26,400 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, like what is happening?

1032
00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:31,320
Speaker 2: Well, we know, women, we can get with our friends

1033
00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:35,399
Speaker 2: and been our niggas our friends ear back about a nigga. Yeah,

1034
00:56:35,560 --> 00:56:38,120
Speaker 2: and then the same shit over and over and over again,

1035
00:56:38,920 --> 00:56:41,040
Speaker 2: and it can be annoying. And we've all done it.

1036
00:56:41,800 --> 00:56:44,440
Speaker 2: We've all been that friend. And then you got to

1037
00:56:44,480 --> 00:56:47,160
Speaker 2: find new bitches to talk to it, talk to about

1038
00:56:47,200 --> 00:56:50,400
Speaker 2: this because everybody's so say.

1039
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:55,920
Speaker 1: Everybody, Now you got to find new people to hear delusion,

1040
00:56:56,520 --> 00:56:59,880
Speaker 1: get out of there. But yeah, like as far as friendship,

1041
00:57:00,239 --> 00:57:02,920
Speaker 1: like best friends usually be the ones you don't talk

1042
00:57:03,000 --> 00:57:05,400
Speaker 1: to every day for real mm hmm, It's okay to

1043
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:08,719
Speaker 1: break up with friends if the relationship is no longer

1044
00:57:08,840 --> 00:57:11,320
Speaker 1: serving you. I kind of hate that term, you know,

1045
00:57:11,520 --> 00:57:14,040
Speaker 1: no longer serving you. I understand what it means, but like,

1046
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:17,200
Speaker 1: what does it mean? You know? This is if it's

1047
00:57:17,360 --> 00:57:20,840
Speaker 1: if it doesn't feel good right, I get happy when

1048
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,440
Speaker 1: I talk to my friends me too. Right, I know

1049
00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:27,080
Speaker 1: the people who caused me like a little mental anguish,

1050
00:57:27,160 --> 00:57:28,880
Speaker 1: and I'm not friends with them no more, like you

1051
00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:31,520
Speaker 1: see them break up with other people and stop being

1052
00:57:31,600 --> 00:57:35,000
Speaker 1: other people friends for trivial bullshit like your turn, Your

1053
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,920
Speaker 1: turn is coming, right, It's definitely coming. Because one of

1054
00:57:37,960 --> 00:57:39,680
Speaker 1: my friends, I would see her fall out with all

1055
00:57:39,720 --> 00:57:43,200
Speaker 1: these different people and like me, and her stayed thick

1056
00:57:43,280 --> 00:57:46,720
Speaker 1: stieves for many years afterwards. But my time came eventually.

1057
00:57:47,160 --> 00:57:47,400
Speaker 2: Yep.

1058
00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:53,800
Speaker 1: So you are not exempt from the bullshit, sweetie. So

1059
00:57:53,840 --> 00:57:56,680
Speaker 1: if you have a friend who always got different friends,

1060
00:57:56,760 --> 00:57:57,760
Speaker 1: danger friends.

1061
00:57:57,480 --> 00:58:02,320
Speaker 2: Either another one is you have to be the friend

1062
00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:06,600
Speaker 2: you want. A lot of people have these hot, such

1063
00:58:06,760 --> 00:58:10,800
Speaker 2: huge expectations of friendship, but then aren't that type of

1064
00:58:10,840 --> 00:58:14,360
Speaker 2: friend in return? So you have to be the type

1065
00:58:14,400 --> 00:58:18,040
Speaker 2: of friend that you want, you.

1066
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:22,120
Speaker 1: Know absolutely, and that that goes with relationships. Right. So

1067
00:58:22,200 --> 00:58:26,320
Speaker 1: we have all these demands for our significant others, right,

1068
00:58:26,840 --> 00:58:28,480
Speaker 1: But a lot of times in order to attract what

1069
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:31,400
Speaker 1: you want, you you gotta change because the current you.

1070
00:58:31,920 --> 00:58:33,880
Speaker 1: It's the same way as like you look back at

1071
00:58:34,080 --> 00:58:36,880
Speaker 1: somebody you don't like anymore, right, and you probably don't

1072
00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:38,680
Speaker 1: even like who you were when you were dating him.

1073
00:58:39,640 --> 00:58:42,880
Speaker 1: It's the same thing. So if you want better, you

1074
00:58:43,160 --> 00:58:46,880
Speaker 1: have to also then become better. Gad you're prepared, girl.

1075
00:58:47,240 --> 00:58:51,160
Speaker 2: Listen. I was going through my text messages deleting the

1076
00:58:51,200 --> 00:58:54,400
Speaker 2: old shit, and it was one of my old hoes

1077
00:58:54,520 --> 00:58:58,160
Speaker 2: that I was like crazy about, and I was reading

1078
00:58:58,240 --> 00:59:00,760
Speaker 2: my messages. Oh, I was like, oh, you're weak in

1079
00:59:00,840 --> 00:59:03,919
Speaker 2: the knees, stand up, bitch, Like I was so mad

1080
00:59:03,960 --> 00:59:08,240
Speaker 2: at myself reading some of those messages. Fucking pussy stand up?

1081
00:59:09,360 --> 00:59:11,680
Speaker 1: What if he was showing those pussy ass hold messages?

1082
00:59:11,840 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 2: Look at this bitch man, right, she love but she

1083
00:59:15,200 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 2: loved me, stupid.

1084
00:59:18,040 --> 00:59:20,480
Speaker 1: Barrel twenty five year old girl. Just know he's showing

1085
00:59:20,520 --> 00:59:22,720
Speaker 1: them text messages and you being weak in the knees

1086
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:29,960
Speaker 1: or to the bitchy cheating with right that part? Just

1087
00:59:30,120 --> 00:59:32,640
Speaker 1: know then that's that that might be happening.

1088
00:59:33,200 --> 00:59:34,840
Speaker 2: Okay, it's possible. For sure.

1089
00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:38,600
Speaker 1: We kind of talked about you know, health and all

1090
00:59:38,680 --> 00:59:42,200
Speaker 1: that stuff, and you know, not taking this current body.

1091
00:59:43,440 --> 00:59:43,600
Speaker 2: Right.

1092
00:59:44,080 --> 00:59:45,760
Speaker 1: Make sure you're taking care of it. Make sure you

1093
00:59:45,920 --> 00:59:49,360
Speaker 1: drink water. We know y'all outside drinking Hennessy is about

1094
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:52,080
Speaker 1: to be warm again. Okay, drinkson water.

1095
00:59:52,520 --> 00:59:54,160
Speaker 2: You know, nobody see no more.

1096
00:59:54,240 --> 00:59:58,600
Speaker 1: That's how I know you ain't no stas girl who

1097
00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:01,360
Speaker 1: drinking have y' I don't know because I don't be

1098
01:00:01,400 --> 01:00:04,600
Speaker 1: outside with the Hawaiians everybody drinking.

1099
01:00:04,640 --> 01:00:10,760
Speaker 2: They waiting tequila Right now, y'all water, especially for years?

1100
01:00:10,880 --> 01:00:13,360
Speaker 2: Enough water? What is wrong with y'all? Some of y'all

1101
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:16,479
Speaker 2: looking like very old And that's because you're not taking

1102
01:00:16,560 --> 01:00:20,680
Speaker 2: care of your body. Every liquor, shot of liquor, you

1103
01:00:20,720 --> 01:00:23,000
Speaker 2: need to drink a cup of water. Damn.

1104
01:00:24,200 --> 01:00:26,440
Speaker 1: So our generation, I think we went through like the

1105
01:00:26,480 --> 01:00:30,040
Speaker 1: BBL era, right. I don't know what's going to be

1106
01:00:30,160 --> 01:00:33,960
Speaker 1: coming up for the gen zs. What y'all gonna be.

1107
01:00:34,000 --> 01:00:39,720
Speaker 2: Doing every every peptide injecting peptide skin.

1108
01:00:40,720 --> 01:00:46,720
Speaker 1: So you want to do consistency versus quick fixes. And

1109
01:00:46,880 --> 01:00:48,360
Speaker 1: you don't want to have to be dealing with some

1110
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:54,000
Speaker 1: ship years later. You know, put your body added and

1111
01:00:54,040 --> 01:00:58,280
Speaker 1: removed all this weird ship right, just just work out.

1112
01:00:58,320 --> 01:01:00,360
Speaker 2: Because a lot of y'all girls who got the blessed

1113
01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:02,920
Speaker 2: plants in the last ten years. Now, y'all got to

1114
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:05,440
Speaker 2: go have another surgery right now, and I know y'all

1115
01:01:05,480 --> 01:01:06,080
Speaker 2: hate that shit.

1116
01:01:06,160 --> 01:01:09,560
Speaker 1: In your forties or something, right, And I hope you

1117
01:01:09,640 --> 01:01:12,600
Speaker 1: got the money right to go get another another breast

1118
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:13,760
Speaker 1: and plant surgery.

1119
01:01:19,840 --> 01:01:20,760
Speaker 2: I don't know how to.

1120
01:01:21,400 --> 01:01:24,880
Speaker 1: I don't know how. I've always been pretty confident. I

1121
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 1: know there are some older, younger women who lack confidence,

1122
01:01:30,280 --> 01:01:33,600
Speaker 1: and I don't know how to help you get more confidence.

1123
01:01:34,920 --> 01:01:36,400
Speaker 2: Look in the mirror and talk to yourself.

1124
01:01:37,120 --> 01:01:39,800
Speaker 1: That's it. That's exactly what the fuck I was about

1125
01:01:39,800 --> 01:01:43,640
Speaker 1: to say. Like people, y'all think that's crazy. Somebody said

1126
01:01:43,680 --> 01:01:45,880
Speaker 1: something to me the other day about looking in the mirror,

1127
01:01:46,520 --> 01:01:50,400
Speaker 1: But I mean it's literally a portal. Okay, So whatever

1128
01:01:50,520 --> 01:01:53,080
Speaker 1: you want to be, you look in the mirror, and

1129
01:01:53,160 --> 01:01:57,320
Speaker 1: that's where you merge those two realities. Okay, you bring

1130
01:01:58,120 --> 01:02:01,680
Speaker 1: bring that other reality through the mirror, right.

1131
01:02:03,600 --> 01:02:05,840
Speaker 2: And you know what, as a young woman I struggle

1132
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:10,320
Speaker 2: with I always gave off confidence, but deep down inside,

1133
01:02:10,400 --> 01:02:17,360
Speaker 2: I struggle with my insecurities and I struggled with imposter

1134
01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:21,920
Speaker 2: syndrome and things like that. But on the outside, I

1135
01:02:22,160 --> 01:02:25,640
Speaker 2: just be putting on a good face. But deep beneath

1136
01:02:25,680 --> 01:02:28,680
Speaker 2: the surface, there were all these things that really lied

1137
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 2: there that you know, I wasn't as confident as I thought,

1138
01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:35,880
Speaker 2: Like I projected, and I wasn't as secure as I projected,

1139
01:02:36,400 --> 01:02:39,680
Speaker 2: and those things I still battle with sometimes, you know,

1140
01:02:39,880 --> 01:02:42,720
Speaker 2: like I'm not perfect. You know, I do know who

1141
01:02:42,840 --> 01:02:45,400
Speaker 2: I am at this age, I know exactly who I am,

1142
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:49,440
Speaker 2: but sometimes I still struggle with insecurities. I mean, and

1143
01:02:49,560 --> 01:02:52,320
Speaker 2: point out one woman who don't have no insecurities, and

1144
01:02:53,040 --> 01:02:54,800
Speaker 2: I call you a liar. I call you a liar.

1145
01:02:54,880 --> 01:03:00,040
Speaker 2: There's something, Yeah, you know there's something there that you might.

1146
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:01,960
Speaker 1: I think we I think you get a certain age

1147
01:03:01,960 --> 01:03:04,320
Speaker 1: you like, fucking this is this is how I'm showing

1148
01:03:04,440 --> 01:03:07,560
Speaker 1: up whatever body, whatever, face like, this is this, it

1149
01:03:07,680 --> 01:03:10,560
Speaker 1: is what it is. I think it's just a little

1150
01:03:10,600 --> 01:03:13,560
Speaker 1: bit more pressure for the younger people, right right.

1151
01:03:17,280 --> 01:03:19,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, you gotta you just have to really.

1152
01:03:19,000 --> 01:03:21,120
Speaker 1: Try to find self love. That is what it all

1153
01:03:21,200 --> 01:03:24,240
Speaker 1: balls down to, and everything else will work itself out.

1154
01:03:24,760 --> 01:03:27,320
Speaker 1: You gotta, like you today, work.

1155
01:03:27,200 --> 01:03:28,360
Speaker 2: On that mm hmm.

1156
01:03:28,640 --> 01:03:32,520
Speaker 1: Everybody, and I don't think like you're like you. Everybody

1157
01:03:33,160 --> 01:03:41,280
Speaker 1: definitely has insecurities. Everybody. I think everybody puts a mask on. Yeah,

1158
01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:43,320
Speaker 1: and then you gotta go home and actually deal with

1159
01:03:43,400 --> 01:03:47,640
Speaker 1: yourself mm hm when you get in that mirror, Yeah,

1160
01:03:47,800 --> 01:03:50,440
Speaker 1: make sure you can deal with you. That's all that matters.

1161
01:03:50,640 --> 01:03:51,480
Speaker 1: Fuck everybody else.

1162
01:03:52,080 --> 01:03:54,520
Speaker 2: If you love you. That's why I could never be

1163
01:03:54,640 --> 01:03:57,600
Speaker 2: a strip of a prostitute. No shade to y'all, but

1164
01:03:57,720 --> 01:04:02,840
Speaker 2: I just would be scared in the mirror. Like like outside,

1165
01:04:02,880 --> 01:04:05,080
Speaker 2: it's like okay, okay, but when you're in that house

1166
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:09,560
Speaker 2: by yourself, you have to really be with yourself. And

1167
01:04:09,640 --> 01:04:11,440
Speaker 2: you know what, And that's why a lot of people

1168
01:04:12,000 --> 01:04:15,280
Speaker 2: don't be at home by theyself because they.

1169
01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:17,800
Speaker 1: Or they're not their real self, and at home by themselves,

1170
01:04:17,800 --> 01:04:21,600
Speaker 1: they're probably drinking on drugs, you know, so they.

1171
01:04:21,360 --> 01:04:24,560
Speaker 2: Face in the phone, keep your face in the phone

1172
01:04:24,640 --> 01:04:28,080
Speaker 2: and things like that, and don't really sit with themself.

1173
01:04:28,800 --> 01:04:30,560
Speaker 1: And I'll say you also, it's okay to fake it

1174
01:04:30,640 --> 01:04:34,400
Speaker 1: till you make it also, right, so you might feel like, yeah,

1175
01:04:34,400 --> 01:04:37,240
Speaker 1: you were showing up this way. You're showing up this way,

1176
01:04:37,280 --> 01:04:39,880
Speaker 1: but deep down inside this is how you feel. Eventually

1177
01:04:40,000 --> 01:04:42,520
Speaker 1: you will trick your subconscious mind and you will become

1178
01:04:42,680 --> 01:04:45,920
Speaker 1: that thing you've been acting like you work okay, so

1179
01:04:46,040 --> 01:04:50,320
Speaker 1: you will become that much more confident. Right, just sometimes

1180
01:04:50,360 --> 01:04:52,600
Speaker 1: you some certain situation you just got fake it till

1181
01:04:52,600 --> 01:04:54,640
Speaker 1: you make it for real.

1182
01:04:58,440 --> 01:05:00,479
Speaker 2: That was wild, That I just said that the reason

1183
01:05:00,520 --> 01:05:09,160
Speaker 2: why I was never a stripper prostitute, just saying.

1184
01:05:09,760 --> 01:05:12,760
Speaker 1: I think it's true. Though, I can only imagine like

1185
01:05:12,920 --> 01:05:15,919
Speaker 1: some of the things that strippers and prostitutes actually go through,

1186
01:05:16,360 --> 01:05:20,760
Speaker 1: and they don't. You don't. I didn't never watch What's

1187
01:05:20,800 --> 01:05:24,000
Speaker 1: the Girl Janice? I know she does, like only fans

1188
01:05:24,040 --> 01:05:29,680
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. Yeah, she was on she was

1189
01:05:29,720 --> 01:05:35,600
Speaker 1: on Joe Button's recently. Isn't her name Denise? I don't

1190
01:05:35,640 --> 01:05:39,320
Speaker 1: know anyway, but I remember she was on Poor Minds

1191
01:05:39,360 --> 01:05:41,080
Speaker 1: and she, you know, she was crying. She did talk

1192
01:05:41,120 --> 01:05:43,920
Speaker 1: about how she was on Joe Button Joe Joe Button

1193
01:05:44,040 --> 01:05:46,000
Speaker 1: talking about how she you know, something did happen to

1194
01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:47,560
Speaker 1: her when she was a child and things like that.

1195
01:05:48,040 --> 01:05:50,280
Speaker 1: So a lot of people who end up in those industries,

1196
01:05:51,000 --> 01:05:54,120
Speaker 1: they have dealt with a lot of trauma, right, and

1197
01:05:54,280 --> 01:05:58,160
Speaker 1: maybe this particular thing is this is how they're expressing.

1198
01:05:58,800 --> 01:06:03,360
Speaker 1: That's how that that trauma is being expressed through this lifestyle.

1199
01:06:03,800 --> 01:06:05,560
Speaker 1: But that's not really what they want to do. But

1200
01:06:05,720 --> 01:06:10,000
Speaker 1: maybe they think that's all they are good for, you know.

1201
01:06:10,560 --> 01:06:15,360
Speaker 1: I can imagine, Yeah, I can imagine how they feel

1202
01:06:15,480 --> 01:06:18,080
Speaker 1: when when when when about itself? So it's not like

1203
01:06:18,240 --> 01:06:21,440
Speaker 1: crazy for you to say you you would be more

1204
01:06:21,520 --> 01:06:26,320
Speaker 1: concerned about the mirror, like for real, right, for real,

1205
01:06:28,240 --> 01:06:31,240
Speaker 1: I am more concerned about how I see me versus

1206
01:06:31,320 --> 01:06:34,040
Speaker 1: how other people see me because I know me right,

1207
01:06:34,160 --> 01:06:35,840
Speaker 1: So as long as I fuck with me, I don't

1208
01:06:35,840 --> 01:06:40,520
Speaker 1: care who doesn't fuck with me. That prayer don't be

1209
01:06:40,600 --> 01:06:47,480
Speaker 1: no people pleaser okay mm hmmm, for men, for for friends,

1210
01:06:48,080 --> 01:06:51,120
Speaker 1: for family. You regret that, and you're gonna be learning

1211
01:06:51,160 --> 01:06:52,200
Speaker 1: at forty how to say.

1212
01:06:52,160 --> 01:06:54,840
Speaker 2: No and you never and you're not going to get

1213
01:06:54,840 --> 01:06:57,880
Speaker 2: a reward for that ship. Nope, you're not going to

1214
01:06:57,960 --> 01:07:02,320
Speaker 2: get a reward for being available and over extending yourself

1215
01:07:02,400 --> 01:07:06,880
Speaker 2: to everybody and everything but yourself. Yeah, I think.

1216
01:07:06,880 --> 01:07:09,320
Speaker 1: Earlier on maybe people. I don't know if I ever

1217
01:07:09,440 --> 01:07:12,400
Speaker 1: cared about being liked I promised. I don't know if

1218
01:07:12,440 --> 01:07:16,560
Speaker 1: I've ever cared about just like making sure everybody likes me.

1219
01:07:16,680 --> 01:07:20,240
Speaker 1: I feel like I like more organic relationships anyway, So

1220
01:07:20,520 --> 01:07:22,880
Speaker 1: me and a person kick it off like that is

1221
01:07:22,960 --> 01:07:27,080
Speaker 1: who I'm supposed to be friends with, Like I'm never

1222
01:07:28,240 --> 01:07:32,200
Speaker 1: I don't know. I definitely get wrapped up and just

1223
01:07:32,360 --> 01:07:36,480
Speaker 1: wanting everybody to to like them, And you want to

1224
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:38,800
Speaker 1: learn that everybody ain't gonna like you either, no matter what.

1225
01:07:39,840 --> 01:07:41,880
Speaker 2: Let me tell you. When I was, especially when I

1226
01:07:42,000 --> 01:07:46,000
Speaker 2: was like very young and college, my college age, I

1227
01:07:46,280 --> 01:07:49,280
Speaker 2: was concerned with that, like why they don't like me?

1228
01:07:49,680 --> 01:07:52,880
Speaker 2: You know, like and I will want people to like me.

1229
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:56,720
Speaker 2: And but then I had to realize, like, some of

1230
01:07:56,760 --> 01:07:59,760
Speaker 2: these bitches are committed to not liking you for no reason.

1231
01:07:59,840 --> 01:08:02,280
Speaker 1: So it's point they don't even like theyselves, so you

1232
01:08:02,320 --> 01:08:02,760
Speaker 1: don't like you.

1233
01:08:03,080 --> 01:08:05,800
Speaker 2: It's pointless to try to even figure it out, you know, like,

1234
01:08:06,880 --> 01:08:08,480
Speaker 2: you know, you get to a place where you can't

1235
01:08:08,480 --> 01:08:10,520
Speaker 2: worry about shit like that, you'd be worried all day.

1236
01:08:11,080 --> 01:08:16,479
Speaker 1: Well, I don't like you, shame. So let's do like

1237
01:08:16,520 --> 01:08:19,920
Speaker 1: a little quick, little rapid fire game right quick for

1238
01:08:20,040 --> 01:08:21,160
Speaker 1: twenty five year old you.

1239
01:08:21,760 --> 01:08:24,880
Speaker 2: Okay, let's see so hold, let me put my hair

1240
01:08:24,960 --> 01:08:26,000
Speaker 2: in a hump in the top.

1241
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:29,400
Speaker 1: Little finger wave.

1242
01:08:30,280 --> 01:08:33,040
Speaker 2: You remember the little homp that was popular, Like you

1243
01:08:33,160 --> 01:08:35,800
Speaker 2: just grabbed that little piece right across the front and

1244
01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:36,200
Speaker 2: put it.

1245
01:08:36,400 --> 01:08:39,960
Speaker 1: Was that that twenty five push it up. I feel

1246
01:08:40,000 --> 01:08:43,200
Speaker 1: like that was younger than twenty five. Really, I don't know,

1247
01:08:43,680 --> 01:08:45,000
Speaker 1: I feel like that was sixteen.

1248
01:08:48,640 --> 01:08:49,000
Speaker 2: What was.

1249
01:08:50,720 --> 01:08:53,880
Speaker 1: Was having someone at twenty five girl, what are you talking?

1250
01:08:54,000 --> 01:08:55,160
Speaker 2: You had a hump in the sewing.

1251
01:08:56,280 --> 01:08:58,679
Speaker 1: You was doing hair at twenty five. You was doing

1252
01:08:58,760 --> 01:09:00,040
Speaker 1: bitch of sewing that twenty.

1253
01:09:00,560 --> 01:09:01,960
Speaker 2: And definitely putting a hump in it.

1254
01:09:02,720 --> 01:09:05,560
Speaker 1: What you need a hump, the little hump that we

1255
01:09:05,680 --> 01:09:06,320
Speaker 1: had right there.

1256
01:09:07,760 --> 01:09:10,320
Speaker 2: I'm find the future, all right.

1257
01:09:10,400 --> 01:09:14,360
Speaker 1: So A I would have listened, B I would have

1258
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:20,320
Speaker 1: ignored it. And C is I would have done the opposite. Okay, okay,

1259
01:09:20,840 --> 01:09:22,559
Speaker 1: save at least twenty percent of your income?

1260
01:09:24,200 --> 01:09:28,880
Speaker 2: Oh what's the A I would have listened with C

1261
01:09:31,479 --> 01:09:35,200
Speaker 2: you would have done the opposite at at twenty five,

1262
01:09:36,280 --> 01:09:40,880
Speaker 2: spend that ship gas on e drink. Game is if

1263
01:09:41,360 --> 01:09:41,680
Speaker 2: if you.

1264
01:09:43,240 --> 01:09:45,680
Speaker 1: If somebody would have told you, then would you have

1265
01:09:45,880 --> 01:09:48,200
Speaker 1: done it? Like now, if your parent mind was not

1266
01:09:48,320 --> 01:09:55,479
Speaker 1: doing this time, you still ain't paying attention at this age. AS.

1267
01:09:55,640 --> 01:09:59,120
Speaker 1: I would have listened had somebody told me, B as

1268
01:09:59,200 --> 01:10:02,200
Speaker 1: I would have ignored had somebody told me. See, I

1269
01:10:02,280 --> 01:10:05,200
Speaker 1: would have done the opposite had someone told me so.

1270
01:10:05,600 --> 01:10:09,200
Speaker 1: First question is save at least twenty percent of your income?

1271
01:10:09,280 --> 01:10:11,280
Speaker 1: If someone had told you to save at least twenty

1272
01:10:11,320 --> 01:10:12,680
Speaker 1: percent of your income.

1273
01:10:13,680 --> 01:10:15,800
Speaker 2: Somebody did tell me, shit that shit, But I was

1274
01:10:15,880 --> 01:10:17,519
Speaker 2: still right.

1275
01:10:17,920 --> 01:10:18,679
Speaker 1: You know somebody.

1276
01:10:19,120 --> 01:10:21,320
Speaker 2: I did have somebody telling me that shit. You know,

1277
01:10:21,600 --> 01:10:23,640
Speaker 2: I just didn't give a fuck. At the time, I

1278
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:26,640
Speaker 2: was young, wild and free and making money for the

1279
01:10:26,720 --> 01:10:29,600
Speaker 2: first time. So it was just like and I just

1280
01:10:29,880 --> 01:10:32,519
Speaker 2: assumed that that money was going to be consistent forever

1281
01:10:32,640 --> 01:10:33,320
Speaker 2: in my head, like.

1282
01:10:35,200 --> 01:10:39,639
Speaker 1: So, yeah, that's it, I'm already arrived. Yeah, and it's

1283
01:10:39,720 --> 01:10:42,000
Speaker 1: just up from here life, It's just up from here,

1284
01:10:42,000 --> 01:10:45,639
Speaker 1: a bitch. Yeah, no, yeah, sometimes you up and sometimes

1285
01:10:45,680 --> 01:10:49,200
Speaker 1: you down right. You gonna learn that ye leave him

1286
01:10:49,280 --> 01:10:50,280
Speaker 1: the first time he lies.

1287
01:10:50,400 --> 01:10:51,519
Speaker 2: Oh wait, you need to answer it.

1288
01:10:52,800 --> 01:10:55,599
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, of course, Like, yeah, I would have saved,

1289
01:10:55,720 --> 01:10:58,519
Speaker 1: like I spent so much money in my mother fucking twenties, bitch,

1290
01:10:58,960 --> 01:11:01,000
Speaker 1: I remember, like I had, I had had a couple accidents,

1291
01:11:01,080 --> 01:11:06,639
Speaker 1: like I had like stacks at different times in life

1292
01:11:06,760 --> 01:11:10,920
Speaker 1: on top of income, and I just I don't know

1293
01:11:10,920 --> 01:11:13,920
Speaker 1: where the money went at I don't know where it

1294
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:15,000
Speaker 1: went bullshit.

1295
01:11:15,920 --> 01:11:19,559
Speaker 2: No, BB got BB got a lot of my motherfucking money. BB.

1296
01:11:21,240 --> 01:11:21,559
Speaker 1: Oh my.

1297
01:11:23,080 --> 01:11:25,519
Speaker 2: Cache, I used to be in Cache running it up.

1298
01:11:25,840 --> 01:11:29,360
Speaker 2: Just wind out that dumb ass ship.

1299
01:11:33,800 --> 01:11:36,040
Speaker 1: So leave him the first time he lies. The first

1300
01:11:36,160 --> 01:11:38,559
Speaker 1: time he lies. You know, I could be a little

1301
01:11:38,760 --> 01:11:42,120
Speaker 1: you know the first time he lied, maybe the second time.

1302
01:11:42,800 --> 01:11:47,479
Speaker 2: Be I would have ignored it, yeah, because I probably

1303
01:11:47,840 --> 01:11:49,120
Speaker 2: lied to the fuck.

1304
01:11:52,280 --> 01:11:53,920
Speaker 1: Start therapy early.

1305
01:11:54,200 --> 01:11:56,559
Speaker 2: Hey, Nope. I just feel like when I was twenty

1306
01:11:56,600 --> 01:12:05,160
Speaker 2: five thirty, therapy was for crazy people, you know you Yeah,

1307
01:12:05,240 --> 01:12:07,479
Speaker 2: but I didn't, you know, I didn't realize that I

1308
01:12:07,600 --> 01:12:11,960
Speaker 2: was crazy back then, so I would have. I wish

1309
01:12:12,040 --> 01:12:14,680
Speaker 2: somebody would have been like, yeah, go to therapy. That's

1310
01:12:14,680 --> 01:12:17,320
Speaker 2: a real thing that can help you, because maybe I

1311
01:12:17,479 --> 01:12:18,240
Speaker 2: was listen.

1312
01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:21,680
Speaker 1: I said, my mam, and this meme last week that

1313
01:12:21,840 --> 01:12:24,360
Speaker 1: said the only difference between me and my mom is

1314
01:12:24,439 --> 01:12:26,200
Speaker 1: that I know I have a mental illness.

1315
01:12:26,600 --> 01:12:28,160
Speaker 2: I sent that to my mom and she did not

1316
01:12:28,320 --> 01:12:30,519
Speaker 2: think that shit was funny. We talked about it on Sunday.

1317
01:12:31,000 --> 01:12:33,639
Speaker 1: She was like, you sent me that, I see you anything.

1318
01:12:33,680 --> 01:12:36,080
Speaker 1: It was funny. I thought it was hilarious. She did

1319
01:12:36,240 --> 01:12:39,479
Speaker 1: not think she was mad by that shit, Like, still

1320
01:12:39,560 --> 01:12:40,000
Speaker 1: don't know she.

1321
01:12:40,040 --> 01:12:40,880
Speaker 2: Got mental illness.

1322
01:12:41,040 --> 01:12:44,760
Speaker 1: That's the mental illness right there. You know, I got one.

1323
01:12:46,280 --> 01:12:48,360
Speaker 2: The first step is acknowledging the problem.

1324
01:12:49,040 --> 01:12:54,360
Speaker 1: Yes, imagine like that was me admitting okay, like, yes, me,

1325
01:12:54,600 --> 01:12:57,479
Speaker 1: you are very much alike a lot. The only difference

1326
01:12:57,600 --> 01:13:01,880
Speaker 1: is I got self awareness of my boat. That's it.

1327
01:13:03,080 --> 01:13:03,680
Speaker 2: She didn't like it.

1328
01:13:04,360 --> 01:13:07,559
Speaker 1: Your your friends will.

1329
01:13:07,640 --> 01:13:10,920
Speaker 2: Change and it was already changing.

1330
01:13:12,760 --> 01:13:18,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's see. Don't post everything online.

1331
01:13:18,640 --> 01:13:19,160
Speaker 2: That is that.

1332
01:13:19,600 --> 01:13:23,520
Speaker 1: That's a big one, because I got some pictures online.

1333
01:13:23,920 --> 01:13:25,880
Speaker 1: If they ever come out of it, I won't even

1334
01:13:25,920 --> 01:13:29,240
Speaker 1: say what the handle was back in nineteen nine, in

1335
01:13:29,320 --> 01:13:32,960
Speaker 1: the two thousands, like young as fuck. Yes, I got

1336
01:13:33,040 --> 01:13:36,439
Speaker 1: some shit out there that I hope never turns up.

1337
01:13:36,920 --> 01:13:40,240
Speaker 1: I feel like I scrabbed the internet pretty well. But

1338
01:13:40,360 --> 01:13:42,640
Speaker 1: what I did learn, even about a place like MySpace,

1339
01:13:42,760 --> 01:13:45,600
Speaker 1: like you can't even log in no more, like you

1340
01:13:45,920 --> 01:13:47,920
Speaker 1: don't own none of that shit, none of your image

1341
01:13:48,000 --> 01:13:48,400
Speaker 1: is nothing.

1342
01:13:49,880 --> 01:13:51,760
Speaker 2: I don't really think I was. I think I was

1343
01:13:52,000 --> 01:13:55,439
Speaker 2: pretty conscious about that. Might be some shit I said

1344
01:13:55,880 --> 01:13:58,280
Speaker 2: that I might not wouldn't pop up. I don't remember,

1345
01:13:59,040 --> 01:14:02,040
Speaker 2: but like pictures and stuff like that. Nah, I was

1346
01:14:02,240 --> 01:14:05,680
Speaker 2: very Now there might be some home videos that have

1347
01:14:05,760 --> 01:14:07,439
Speaker 2: made with a nigga I don't want to show up.

1348
01:14:10,640 --> 01:14:12,120
Speaker 1: Well, I mean that would have been ship you sent

1349
01:14:12,200 --> 01:14:17,080
Speaker 1: to somebody and they sharing it. I made some home videos,

1350
01:14:18,320 --> 01:14:21,680
Speaker 1: but you put them online. Oh no, that's not saying Yeah,

1351
01:14:21,720 --> 01:14:24,639
Speaker 1: this is like don't post so yeah, along with don't

1352
01:14:24,640 --> 01:14:28,719
Speaker 1: post everything online. Don't be sending these niggas your body, right, Okay,

1353
01:14:30,280 --> 01:14:32,080
Speaker 1: get the cock shot though, because that shit is that

1354
01:14:32,320 --> 01:14:33,599
Speaker 1: that will save you a lot.

1355
01:14:33,560 --> 01:14:36,639
Speaker 2: Of time or at least crop your head out.

1356
01:14:37,960 --> 01:14:44,360
Speaker 1: Right, uh, invest instead of splurging. That's kind of along

1357
01:14:44,400 --> 01:14:50,799
Speaker 1: the line as saving some income. You are not behind, okay,

1358
01:14:51,200 --> 01:14:53,320
Speaker 1: definitely not at twenty five, but you also don't have

1359
01:14:53,479 --> 01:14:57,280
Speaker 1: as much time as you think. I wish somebody would have.

1360
01:14:57,640 --> 01:15:01,519
Speaker 1: I feel like I might have hustle backwards, right, I

1361
01:15:01,680 --> 01:15:04,000
Speaker 1: was so eager to like get a job and start

1362
01:15:04,040 --> 01:15:08,439
Speaker 1: making money like I didn't do. I didn't want to

1363
01:15:08,439 --> 01:15:10,280
Speaker 1: be the broke college student. Like that is just something

1364
01:15:10,280 --> 01:15:12,800
Speaker 1: you had to go through. Yeah, because what's gonna happen

1365
01:15:12,880 --> 01:15:17,599
Speaker 1: is you're gonna end up thirty, not finish the fucking degree, right,

1366
01:15:17,680 --> 01:15:20,120
Speaker 1: and be trying to go back and do ship all

1367
01:15:20,160 --> 01:15:24,599
Speaker 1: over again. So just go through, go through the thing.

1368
01:15:26,000 --> 01:15:31,400
Speaker 2: Stop dating. Yeah, b I would have ignored it. Yeah,

1369
01:15:31,600 --> 01:15:31,880
Speaker 2: me too.

1370
01:15:32,600 --> 01:15:36,640
Speaker 1: Absolutely, you don't know anything. You're just this is the

1371
01:15:36,800 --> 01:15:50,040
Speaker 1: whole bitch, the old bitch. He'll, he'll, he'll before your

1372
01:15:50,160 --> 01:15:51,000
Speaker 1: next relationship.

1373
01:15:52,320 --> 01:15:55,519
Speaker 2: Now, I'm still a little a little hopper now, because

1374
01:15:55,560 --> 01:15:59,600
Speaker 2: why I would have ignored it. I ignore it now because.

1375
01:15:59,360 --> 01:16:03,960
Speaker 1: Why why what fu could we waiting for? Especially the

1376
01:16:04,080 --> 01:16:08,760
Speaker 1: older I get the last time I'm waiting Shit, who's next? Yeah,

1377
01:16:09,360 --> 01:16:11,800
Speaker 1: not not now anyway, because I am in a relationship,

1378
01:16:11,840 --> 01:16:16,760
Speaker 1: but for sure, Like but even this relationship versus the

1379
01:16:16,840 --> 01:16:19,800
Speaker 1: last one, it was a weekend. Okay, it was a

1380
01:16:19,960 --> 01:16:24,320
Speaker 1: weekend apart nobody got on time to be playing around,

1381
01:16:24,400 --> 01:16:26,120
Speaker 1: Like I remember my homeboy was like, oh you you

1382
01:16:26,320 --> 01:16:30,760
Speaker 1: move on fast? Like why wouldn't I? Men always got

1383
01:16:30,800 --> 01:16:32,960
Speaker 1: a nigga, a bitch in the pocket somewhere. Maybe a

1384
01:16:33,040 --> 01:16:41,840
Speaker 1: nigga too, okay, but men always exactly definitely in take

1385
01:16:41,880 --> 01:16:48,479
Speaker 1: your health serious now, I'm gay. I got my mom

1386
01:16:48,640 --> 01:16:50,880
Speaker 1: is like trying to do all this holistic stuff. She's seventy.

1387
01:16:51,960 --> 01:16:53,599
Speaker 1: She's trying to do all this holistic shit that I've

1388
01:16:53,600 --> 01:16:56,120
Speaker 1: been trying to get her do for years. She trying

1389
01:16:56,160 --> 01:16:58,559
Speaker 1: to do it now at seventy. So if you started

1390
01:16:58,640 --> 01:17:01,880
Speaker 1: twenty five, you won't have to be consciously struggling even

1391
01:17:01,960 --> 01:17:06,160
Speaker 1: at thirty forty, right to unlearn a lot of the

1392
01:17:06,280 --> 01:17:10,679
Speaker 1: eating habits, all that shit, Like take your health serious today,

1393
01:17:10,800 --> 01:17:15,559
Speaker 1: because you only got one body for real, right, one body?

1394
01:17:16,400 --> 01:17:17,040
Speaker 2: Use a condom.

1395
01:17:17,120 --> 01:17:19,200
Speaker 1: I know, i'd be around here talk about smashing raw

1396
01:17:19,320 --> 01:17:21,080
Speaker 1: ship if we know, y'all ask, don't be going to

1397
01:17:21,200 --> 01:17:23,280
Speaker 1: the doctor. So use a condom, bitch.

1398
01:17:23,479 --> 01:17:25,240
Speaker 2: Oh, that's the first time she said that.

1399
01:17:27,600 --> 01:17:30,320
Speaker 1: You use a condom because I don't know.

1400
01:17:30,960 --> 01:17:34,120
Speaker 2: I don't conto. It feels good, like I don't understand

1401
01:17:34,120 --> 01:17:35,400
Speaker 2: why people don't want to use it.

1402
01:17:35,560 --> 01:17:39,439
Speaker 1: No skin, the skin condoms those feel pretty nice. Yeah,

1403
01:17:39,720 --> 01:17:42,080
Speaker 1: like that's ky and skin and.

1404
01:17:42,240 --> 01:17:46,800
Speaker 2: You can sleep peacefully at night after you use a condom, like, yes,

1405
01:17:47,240 --> 01:17:49,760
Speaker 2: you don't have to worry about the next period. You're

1406
01:17:49,800 --> 01:17:53,599
Speaker 2: not worried about like what connects tests right, coming back

1407
01:17:54,680 --> 01:17:56,840
Speaker 2: more peacefully. I don't see why people don't do it.

1408
01:17:57,600 --> 01:18:01,200
Speaker 1: Look, I had, I got tested just last week, and

1409
01:18:01,520 --> 01:18:05,759
Speaker 1: still it is like nerve wrecking waiting for these test results.

1410
01:18:06,640 --> 01:18:10,680
Speaker 1: Even when you in a monogamous relationship, like shit just

1411
01:18:10,760 --> 01:18:12,920
Speaker 1: be going down. You don't know who got what, land,

1412
01:18:12,960 --> 01:18:16,360
Speaker 1: dormant where, So you have to be responsible for your

1413
01:18:16,400 --> 01:18:18,120
Speaker 1: body dode. I'll let these niggas put your life in

1414
01:18:18,160 --> 01:18:25,680
Speaker 1: their hands, because not everybody deserves access to you. That's friends, family, men,

1415
01:18:26,160 --> 01:18:33,479
Speaker 1: a right, start a business now. I always would say,

1416
01:18:33,560 --> 01:18:35,880
Speaker 1: like get a business loan instead of a suitent loan.

1417
01:18:35,960 --> 01:18:37,240
Speaker 1: But you know they're gonna make it hard for you

1418
01:18:37,280 --> 01:18:40,000
Speaker 1: to get a business loan anyway. But if you got

1419
01:18:40,120 --> 01:18:43,519
Speaker 1: decent credit, like right now, if you like twenty, go

1420
01:18:43,560 --> 01:18:45,280
Speaker 1: ahead and fuck it up and get all the shit

1421
01:18:45,400 --> 01:18:47,759
Speaker 1: you want so you can have everything and your credit

1422
01:18:47,840 --> 01:18:52,760
Speaker 1: be good by thirty again. Yeah. Like, if somebody would

1423
01:18:52,800 --> 01:18:55,599
Speaker 1: have told me that, I would have really strategically fucked

1424
01:18:55,640 --> 01:18:58,200
Speaker 1: my credit up at twenty instead of doing like frivolous

1425
01:18:58,240 --> 01:19:01,800
Speaker 1: little bullshit like buying ring from Kate Jewelry, just dumb

1426
01:19:01,880 --> 01:19:04,640
Speaker 1: shit with my credit and not paying for it. I

1427
01:19:04,720 --> 01:19:10,160
Speaker 1: would have strategically fucked my credit up, had a house, car,

1428
01:19:10,520 --> 01:19:13,880
Speaker 1: all that shit, early twins and would have been good.

1429
01:19:13,960 --> 01:19:15,840
Speaker 1: Would have been good by you know, seven years.

1430
01:19:17,960 --> 01:19:19,560
Speaker 2: Your job is not your identity.

1431
01:19:20,640 --> 01:19:22,880
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I think some women need to hear that now.

1432
01:19:23,200 --> 01:19:24,760
Speaker 2: I was about to say a lot of women need

1433
01:19:24,840 --> 01:19:26,360
Speaker 2: to hear that now a lot of people need to

1434
01:19:26,400 --> 01:19:27,080
Speaker 2: hear that right now.

1435
01:19:28,400 --> 01:19:30,640
Speaker 1: Because that's why I can't stand with somebody asking me

1436
01:19:30,800 --> 01:19:33,000
Speaker 1: what you do. I breathe for a living.

1437
01:19:33,520 --> 01:19:34,000
Speaker 2: That's what I do.

1438
01:19:34,920 --> 01:19:36,800
Speaker 1: Don't be trying to get is.

1439
01:19:36,840 --> 01:19:38,479
Speaker 2: The worst about that. That's the first thing I want

1440
01:19:38,520 --> 01:19:41,360
Speaker 2: to know about you. They don't even want to know

1441
01:19:41,479 --> 01:19:44,000
Speaker 2: your name. But I feel like in la is like

1442
01:19:44,880 --> 01:19:47,160
Speaker 2: they will need to know what part of town you

1443
01:19:47,280 --> 01:19:48,880
Speaker 2: live in and what you do so they can know

1444
01:19:49,000 --> 01:19:50,200
Speaker 2: how they should treat.

1445
01:19:50,080 --> 01:19:53,280
Speaker 1: You and how to finesse you if they need you

1446
01:19:53,439 --> 01:19:56,439
Speaker 1: or not. They need trying to determine if they need

1447
01:19:56,560 --> 01:19:59,360
Speaker 1: you or should you even be around them type shit right.

1448
01:20:01,280 --> 01:20:03,559
Speaker 2: To dances. No, you don't need me and I don't

1449
01:20:03,600 --> 01:20:04,240
Speaker 2: need to be around you.

1450
01:20:04,400 --> 01:20:05,080
Speaker 1: Just go with that.

1451
01:20:05,439 --> 01:20:08,559
Speaker 2: When you're fucking with me, travel, but don't go broke

1452
01:20:08,680 --> 01:20:12,200
Speaker 2: doing it. I ain't need nobody to tell me that

1453
01:20:12,320 --> 01:20:17,920
Speaker 2: shit fucking bills go nobody tell me that ship.

1454
01:20:19,000 --> 01:20:22,760
Speaker 1: Wow? Yeah, so that was fun.

1455
01:20:23,240 --> 01:20:25,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wish well.

1456
01:20:25,880 --> 01:20:30,519
Speaker 1: My my goddaughter's mom when she was graduate from high school,

1457
01:20:30,600 --> 01:20:33,280
Speaker 1: she had text me and asked me, like what would

1458
01:20:33,280 --> 01:20:37,479
Speaker 1: I tell my daughter? You know, and if my goddaughter

1459
01:20:37,600 --> 01:20:39,320
Speaker 1: was my kid, Like what would I be telling her?

1460
01:20:39,400 --> 01:20:39,639
Speaker 2: Whatever?

1461
01:20:39,680 --> 01:20:41,320
Speaker 1: So I gave her a lot of a lot of

1462
01:20:41,360 --> 01:20:42,880
Speaker 1: good things and some of the ship is on here,

1463
01:20:43,000 --> 01:20:45,720
Speaker 1: like get the fucking student loan, get the business own

1464
01:20:45,760 --> 01:20:46,679
Speaker 1: instead of the suit alone.

1465
01:20:46,960 --> 01:20:48,200
Speaker 2: All this ship we said today.

1466
01:20:48,880 --> 01:20:51,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, keep your aggressed to some minimum a lot of

1467
01:20:51,040 --> 01:20:54,400
Speaker 1: this stuff. I actually rode to my goddaughter when she

1468
01:20:54,520 --> 01:20:55,519
Speaker 1: graduate from high school.

1469
01:20:55,600 --> 01:20:56,599
Speaker 2: She has a baby now.

1470
01:21:00,040 --> 01:21:03,800
Speaker 1: She eyes to her rare though, so she's a she's

1471
01:21:03,840 --> 01:21:06,160
Speaker 1: a nail tex so she got her own little business going.

1472
01:21:06,720 --> 01:21:07,280
Speaker 1: So that's good.

1473
01:21:07,800 --> 01:21:11,000
Speaker 2: But you know that saying youth is wasted on the young,

1474
01:21:12,479 --> 01:21:15,680
Speaker 2: It's so true because they don't know what to do

1475
01:21:15,880 --> 01:21:18,400
Speaker 2: with it. And the knowledge that you get as you

1476
01:21:18,520 --> 01:21:21,200
Speaker 2: grow old, if you had it when you was young,

1477
01:21:21,320 --> 01:21:24,080
Speaker 2: you would be more responsible with your youth. And I

1478
01:21:24,160 --> 01:21:27,200
Speaker 2: think that's what this episode. If you are listening and

1479
01:21:27,360 --> 01:21:31,000
Speaker 2: you are much younger, take heed of the things that

1480
01:21:31,080 --> 01:21:33,439
Speaker 2: we're saying, and please apply them to your life. It's

1481
01:21:33,439 --> 01:21:35,439
Speaker 2: it's gonna make it much better when you grow old

1482
01:21:35,479 --> 01:21:38,200
Speaker 2: if you get to you know, and most of us

1483
01:21:38,280 --> 01:21:40,679
Speaker 2: will get to. So you don't want to be like, damn,

1484
01:21:40,720 --> 01:21:42,800
Speaker 2: I should have listened to them. We talked back, bitch,

1485
01:21:42,880 --> 01:21:43,639
Speaker 2: just ten years ago.

1486
01:21:48,600 --> 01:21:50,639
Speaker 1: And you are not supposed to know everything.

1487
01:21:52,760 --> 01:21:54,960
Speaker 2: Okay, you're supposed to make mistakes.

1488
01:21:54,720 --> 01:21:58,439
Speaker 1: You know, but know enough to know you don't know shit,

1489
01:21:58,920 --> 01:22:02,000
Speaker 1: and try to get some of the knowledge right so

1490
01:22:02,080 --> 01:22:04,640
Speaker 1: you can just put yourself in a better position and

1491
01:22:04,760 --> 01:22:09,439
Speaker 1: all aspects of life, from love, finances, all this shit.

1492
01:22:09,640 --> 01:22:12,479
Speaker 1: Just get as much information as you can. Surround yourself

1493
01:22:12,520 --> 01:22:14,519
Speaker 1: by smart people. If you're the smartest person, you know,

1494
01:22:14,600 --> 01:22:19,679
Speaker 1: bit you dumb, right, okay, surround yourself with some smart people.

1495
01:22:19,760 --> 01:22:22,200
Speaker 1: That is my last list, and.

1496
01:22:22,880 --> 01:22:25,360
Speaker 2: Just keep doing your best. If you are here doing

1497
01:22:25,439 --> 01:22:30,559
Speaker 2: your best, that's enough, honestly. And sometimes your best ain't shit.

1498
01:22:31,880 --> 01:22:36,639
Speaker 2: But what I'm saying, it's enough. Like some days your

1499
01:22:36,720 --> 01:22:40,920
Speaker 2: best is just existing and that's okay, you know, That's

1500
01:22:40,960 --> 01:22:44,880
Speaker 2: what I mean. Like for real life, some days we

1501
01:22:44,960 --> 01:22:47,840
Speaker 2: can get like our day, we don't get nothing done.

1502
01:22:48,600 --> 01:22:50,320
Speaker 2: We could have a laundry list of shit to do

1503
01:22:50,439 --> 01:22:53,400
Speaker 2: and nothing happens, and it's still okay because sometimes you

1504
01:22:53,600 --> 01:22:57,040
Speaker 2: just can't, you know, don't beat yourself up about it.

1505
01:22:57,600 --> 01:23:00,719
Speaker 2: The next day, start over and take that list again.

1506
01:23:02,360 --> 01:23:07,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, man, that's my last All right, y'all. Hye hs.

1507
01:23:11,400 --> 01:23:14,240
Speaker 1: If you enjoyed this episode, y'all, tune in every Thursday

1508
01:23:14,320 --> 01:23:16,960
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect iHeart Radio app or wherever the

1509
01:23:17,000 --> 01:23:18,800
Speaker 1: fuck you get your podcasts at. This is your co

1510
01:23:19,000 --> 01:23:23,320
Speaker 1: host A J Holiday two point zero on Instagrams. This

1511
01:23:23,400 --> 01:23:24,479
Speaker 1: is a long ass episode.

1512
01:23:25,080 --> 01:23:28,280
Speaker 2: Damn you can marek this too and cut it in half, right,

1513
01:23:29,680 --> 01:23:32,720
Speaker 2: but you know what, not to forget the o ns

1514
01:23:32,800 --> 01:23:36,439
Speaker 2: and the old hes. We love y'all too, to this

1515
01:23:36,640 --> 01:23:41,400
Speaker 2: information that you probably already do and we're still struggling with.

1516
01:23:41,880 --> 01:23:46,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, just got that same man, still got that same friend.

1517
01:23:47,160 --> 01:23:58,160
Speaker 2: Still got the same insecurities. It's still fat so just

1518
01:23:58,320 --> 01:24:02,439
Speaker 2: still we love you anyway. Thank you for tuning in.

1519
01:24:03,120 --> 01:24:06,439
Speaker 2: It's official Tampa on Instagram. Y'all follow me there. Remember

1520
01:24:06,560 --> 01:24:13,479
Speaker 2: speak now ah and never hold your youth period. That

1521
01:24:13,640 --> 01:24:16,960
Speaker 2: makes sense. Bye bye.

1522
01:24:19,560 --> 01:24:23,439
Speaker 1: We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeartRadio. Visit

1523
01:24:23,520 --> 01:24:27,280
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to

1524
01:24:27,360 --> 01:24:28,240
Speaker 1: your favorite shows.