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Speaker 1: This is John. This is your og Okay Storytime podcast hosts,

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Speaker 1: and we have some rocking stories for you coming up.

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Speaker 2: But before you rock out with your socks out, I

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Speaker 2: got a quick tum in an ad break from a sponsors.

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Speaker 1: Keeping the show rocking and rolling.

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Speaker 3: My husband pranked me with a shady Jim outfit. Now

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Speaker 3: I wear it every time, as you should. I'm thirty

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Speaker 3: five and he's twenty nine. He bought me a sports

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Speaker 3: bra in bottoms that he saw on an instant model

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Speaker 3: and thought they'd suit me. The shorts are pretty much thongs,

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Speaker 3: but I loved the bras as it was very supportive

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Speaker 3: and I wore it to the gym. By the way,

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Speaker 3: this comes from blacked Jim Girl, and if you want

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Speaker 3: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash

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Speaker 3: Okay Storytime subreddit. I'm Carly and I'm Savannah, and we're

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Speaker 3: here to give good advice. Goofy, But we don't have

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Speaker 3: all the answers. We only know what we would do,

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Speaker 3: So let us know what you would do in the

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Speaker 3: comments and OPI says. When I got back, he asked

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Speaker 3: if anyone said anything about my sports bra or if

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Speaker 3: anyone looked. I said no, people do look in the gym,

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Speaker 3: but I always say no one. He asks, as he's

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Speaker 3: a bit jealous, and he seemed disappointed. When I asked why,

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Speaker 3: he started laughing and said the logo on the sports

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Speaker 3: bra Blacked is a corn company that specializes in interracial corn.

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Speaker 3: I didn't really get the prank, as I don't think

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Speaker 3: many people would know that, but it annoyed me that

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Speaker 3: he tried to humiliate me, and I said, bit ironic.

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Speaker 3: You sent me outside in that when you got upset

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Speaker 3: finding out I'd been with black men. This caused a

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Speaker 3: big argument, and since then, I've worn this sports bra

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Speaker 3: every time I've been to the gym or out on

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Speaker 3: runs out of spite. I even put the bottoms on

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Speaker 3: under my shorts and make sure the waistband sticks out

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Speaker 3: with Blacked wrote all around it. I've even thought about

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Speaker 3: posting a pick of myself on Instagram wearing it and

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Speaker 3: going to his friend's barbecue on Sunday wearing it. Should

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Speaker 3: I carry on this petty revenge or stop? Some relevant

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Speaker 3: comments commenter one, No, you're not the a hole. I

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Speaker 3: don't know why men think it's okay to use that

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Speaker 3: against us, like sorry, we don't see people by just

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Speaker 3: appearance shaking my head. Opie said it nearly split us

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Speaker 3: up when he first reacted to it, as I found

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Speaker 3: it discriminatory. But he told me he just watched too

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Speaker 3: much corn when he was younger and he was insecure.

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Speaker 3: Can't be that insecure if he's sending me out in

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Speaker 3: corn related sportswear. Commenter two, your boyfriend is weird, not

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Speaker 3: the A hole. I'd be annoyed and creeped out. Opie responds,

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Speaker 3: I was honestly very annoyed, and that's why I've kept

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Speaker 3: wearing it to annoy him. Commenter three, You're not the

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Speaker 3: a hole for wearing the clothes he gave you and

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Speaker 3: was hoping you'd wear.

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Speaker 4: But you're in a cold war.

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Speaker 3: And not sure this relationship has any chance of going

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Speaker 3: anywhere healthy, So you're the a hole to yourself if

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Speaker 3: you don't make a change. Opie responds, I'll be honest.

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Speaker 3: Me stooping to his level has me questioning myself and

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Speaker 3: this relationship. Commenter four, If this type of thing is

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Speaker 3: normal in your relationship, I suspect you may have bigger issues.

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Speaker 3: Have a look at this quiz and if nothing else,

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Speaker 3: then for poops and giggles. Personally, I'd be infuriated that

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Speaker 3: my partner decided to actively try to humiliate me. I'd

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Speaker 3: also be upset with them policing and restricting what I

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Speaker 3: wear and places I go. Never mind feeling alone and

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Speaker 3: sad over not being able to trust. We can talk

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Speaker 3: about it without there being a fight. Remember, it's only

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Speaker 3: a joke and a prank. If everyone's laughing, People laughing

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Speaker 3: at you while you're upset, isn't a joke or a prank.

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Speaker 3: That's just plain bullying. Hope, he responds, everything you've said

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Speaker 3: is true. Yeah, I fully agree with it. That We have

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Speaker 3: a couple more comments, but I fully agree with all

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Speaker 3: of that. I think that that's a not a funny prank.

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Speaker 3: It's definitely way too far, especially if she's not laughing

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Speaker 3: like that last commenter said it exactly right. It's only

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Speaker 3: funny if everyone's gonna find it funny. If everyone's not

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Speaker 3: gonna like and you should. I know your partner well

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Speaker 3: enough to know that that's like you're just trying to

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Speaker 3: humiliate her at the gym. I will say, no, I

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Speaker 3: don't think you should wear it to the barbecue. But

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Speaker 3: but honestly, like, go for it girl, I also kind

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Speaker 3: of support it, So yeah.

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Speaker 5: He I think like he meant for it to be

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Speaker 5: funny and like, yeah, it's funny, but then like he

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Speaker 5: got mad at like the response to it, right, It's like, well,

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Speaker 5: maybe not everyone you know finds it funny, Like maybe

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Speaker 5: you find it funny because you're weird like that, but

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Speaker 5: like to me, it just seems like you're trying to

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Speaker 5: like embarrass me or.

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Speaker 3: Something, right, you know, you're laughing at me for like

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Speaker 3: being like, why did you try to humiliate me when

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Speaker 3: you supposedly love me? Like it's just a really and

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Speaker 3: it feels like it's very much out of the place

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Speaker 3: that she was talking about about his like insecurities and

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Speaker 3: like I'm not sure why he thought putting like playing

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Speaker 3: that specific prank would make him feel better in that sense.

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Speaker 3: Like it's really weird. Yeah, you're like mad when people

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Speaker 3: s stare at her, So you put her in something

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Speaker 3: expecting her to get stared at. She doesn't. You get

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Speaker 3: mad at her because she doesn't, and then you get

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Speaker 3: mad at her for feeling really upset that you actually

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Speaker 3: tried to humiliate her.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean everything just seems completely backwards.

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Speaker 3: Commentri five, Nah but you would be be a hole

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Speaker 3: to yourself if you stayed with the man who controls

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Speaker 3: what you wear and makes you change gyms because he's insecure.

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Speaker 3: Opie says, he tried to make me change Jim. No

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Speaker 3: chance that I was changing.

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Speaker 6: Okay, that's too far. You don't need to change gems?

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Speaker 6: Why because no one care about the people. That's just

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Speaker 6: how was that your fault?

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Speaker 5: But like, and then guess what, Then she's gonna go

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Speaker 5: to a different gym and it's gonna happen again. And

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Speaker 5: it's just gonna go to a different one and happen again. Sorry,

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Speaker 5: that's what happens at a Jim.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: Uh?

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Speaker 3: OHP's location? Opie says, we aren't in America? Oh Uh?

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Speaker 3: Why is Opie's husband still upset with her? Opie says,

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Speaker 3: I've asked him all this and he keeps just saying

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Speaker 3: it was a joke. So I said, well, is the

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Speaker 3: joke not still running? If I keep wearing it? Why

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Speaker 3: is it different? Now I'm in on the joke, and

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Speaker 3: he'll just say it's not the same. Opie on the

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Speaker 3: sports bra, Opie says, I like how supportive the bra

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Speaker 3: is though, Lol, keep wearing a girl I've spent hundreds

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Speaker 3: on sports bras in the past, as I'm thirty two

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Speaker 3: double d so it's hard to find something that holds

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Speaker 3: them down and stops them hurting. And this sports bra

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Speaker 3: is the best I've ever had. We have an update

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Speaker 3: a month of one point five months later. Any other thoughts,

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Speaker 3: I mean, I don't think this is worthy of like

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Speaker 3: a breakup. I don't feel like but i'd be like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm a little hurt. Yeah, he does need to like

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Speaker 3: realize what he did was wrong, though, Like you can't

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Speaker 3: just be like, well, it's not funny anymore that you

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Speaker 3: know about it, Like you need to be like it

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Speaker 3: was ever funny to begin with, dude, Like, yeah, uh

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Speaker 3: did a update one and a half months later. I

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Speaker 3: didn't end up posting it on Instagram or wearing it

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Speaker 3: at the barbecue I mentioned where it too, because he

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Speaker 3: threw them away when I went out and left them

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Speaker 3: on the radiator to dry. I'll be honest, I wouldn't

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Speaker 3: have dared anyway, but I went to put the bra

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Speaker 3: on under my T shirt to go for a run

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Speaker 3: and couldn't find it anywhere. I asked him if he'd

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Speaker 3: seen it, and he said he bought them so he

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Speaker 3: can do what he wants with them, and he threw

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Speaker 3: them in a public bin so I wouldn't find them.

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Speaker 6: Okay, now that's a red flag.

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Speaker 3: That's he's controlling what she wears, like no, yeah, and

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Speaker 3: it was under a shirt too, come on. I was

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Speaker 3: so angry they were mine, not his end. While I

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Speaker 3: didn't care about the bottoms, the bra was very supportive.

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Speaker 3: I was just thinking about taking his PS five that

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Speaker 3: I bought him and bidding it to prove a point.

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Speaker 3: But then I took a breath, went for a walk,

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Speaker 3: returned a couple of hours later and told him I

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Speaker 3: want a divorce.

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Speaker 5: Whoa that escalated so far to be other things that

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Speaker 5: lass building.

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Speaker 3: Being the idiot he is, he said, what over a bra,

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Speaker 3: not realizing it was a build up of the way

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Speaker 3: he was acting before all that. I reeled off a

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Speaker 3: list off a list of stuff, trying to humiliate me

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Speaker 3: with the prank in the first place, calling me saggy

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Speaker 3: front airbags in front of his friends, all the time,

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Speaker 3: being jealous and possessive, belittling my hobbies and things I

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Speaker 3: do for fun, constantly talking about women like crap, and

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Speaker 3: a few other things. All he would say was, well,

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Speaker 3: why didn't you divorce me? When that happened to every point,

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Speaker 3: which was annoying. His only defense was the saggy front

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Speaker 3: airbags one when he said, they've seen your front airbags

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Speaker 3: and like them, so it's only a joke. He did

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Speaker 3: ask years ago if he could show them a.

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Speaker 4: Pick, and I said, yes, Wait, show who a pick?

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Speaker 3: His friend's a pick of her front?

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Speaker 6: Wait what it could be a guy? See picture?

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Speaker 4: Uh yeah here what du like? That's so so because

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Speaker 4: he or no?

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Speaker 6: Did he like?

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Speaker 5: I'm trying to use his logic like if he took

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Speaker 5: the picture, now it's his property. Now he can show

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Speaker 5: whoever you want.

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Speaker 3: Says they asked him. But that's a lot of stuff

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Speaker 3: like girl, yeah, good on you for that's crazy. I

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Speaker 3: moved out that day and said I'd continue to pay

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Speaker 3: my half of the rent until the contract is up

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Speaker 3: at the end of January. I went to stay at

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Speaker 3: a hotel for a couple of nights before one of

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Speaker 3: my brother's friends said I could go stay in one

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Speaker 3: of his empty properties. And I'm still here now. I

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Speaker 3: actually really like it and think I'll stay here for good. Honestly,

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Speaker 3: it sounds like that was just the tipping point. And yeah,

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Speaker 3: that's a lot of just like especially the fact that

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Speaker 3: you're saying that he's always talked like crap about women

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Speaker 3: and just like ichy ikey, yuck, don't he literally.

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Speaker 6: Gets under well gets under my skin, like just like

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Speaker 6: little comments.

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Speaker 5: Here and there, like you don't have to say them

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Speaker 5: if that's what you lave like, but then it's one

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Speaker 5: thing to actually believe that another thing to like say

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Speaker 5: it out loud and like be like, oh, like am

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Speaker 5: I'm am I supposed to agree that I'm less than you?

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Speaker 5: Like right, that's crazy, that's a wild like, yeah that's what,

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Speaker 5: that's what kind of peas me off.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we got a little bit left. He still messages

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Speaker 3: a lot, a mix between asking me back and trying

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Speaker 3: to make me jealous, but I ignore him. I've spoke

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Speaker 3: to a lawyer and started the divorce, but she said

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Speaker 3: it'll probably take around a year. Sorry the update wasn't

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Speaker 3: much fun, but it is what it is for now.

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Speaker 3: If anyone's interested, when I start having a fun life again,

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Speaker 3: i'll let you know. Elloel, me and a friend are

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Speaker 3: going to Amsterdam next week, so that should be fun.

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Speaker 3: We have some comments. Commenter one. I find it odd

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Speaker 3: you married an idiot and put up with his borderline

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Speaker 3: for years and then all of a sudden grew a

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Speaker 3: spine after a Reddit post. I don't find that odd

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Speaker 3: at all. Commer I think a lot of people hit

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Speaker 3: their breaking point, like Opie responds, I think it was

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Speaker 3: the fact he wanted to publicly humiliate me and then

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Speaker 3: his reaction when it didn't work. That plus the fact

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Speaker 3: in the last month or so he also forced me

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Speaker 3: to change gyms, and a bit of extra confidence from

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Speaker 3: going to the gym made me realize. Comment two says,

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Speaker 3: speak to the landlord, see if you can get your

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Speaker 3: name off the lease so you don't have to pay

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Speaker 3: for somewhere you don't live, You are paying for him

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Speaker 3: to have the whole place to himself. Opie says, I've

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Speaker 3: told the landlord I've moved out, so anything that happens

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Speaker 3: is on my ex and that is the end of

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Speaker 3: that story.

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Speaker 4: Oh good for you.

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Speaker 5: I mean, yeah, you got out of it, and honestly,

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Speaker 5: it seems like I mean I'm assuming that you are

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Speaker 5: together for a little while, so I mean that stinks.

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Speaker 6: I hate like these stories that are just like, oh, I.

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Speaker 5: You know, was with this person for ten years and

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Speaker 5: then all of a sudden they're completely like different.

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Speaker 4: That gives me no hope and I'm scared.

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Speaker 6: But like, yeah, that's that's a horrible situation.

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Speaker 5: Shouldn't be in because belitterally will never get you literally anywhere.

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Speaker 5: Like it's literally belterally is negative in its truest form,

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Speaker 5: Like it's not something positive. It's not something that's gonna

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Speaker 5: make your day. It's not like none of it is

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Speaker 5: for good. So the fact that he thinks he can

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Speaker 5: get away with that and just be like oh yeah,

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Speaker 5: like it was just a joke, you know, like cool,

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Speaker 5: it was a joke until it wasn't then you made

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Speaker 5: it more serious.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't ever funny to me, So it wasn't ever

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Speaker 3: a good joke. And you definitely he knew that was

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Speaker 3: humiliation and not a funny thing for sure for her,

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Speaker 3: Like come on, dude, or you're just really that dumb.

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Speaker 3: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

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Speaker 3: to the next one.

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Speaker 4: My husband keeps leaving us on Christmas Eve just to

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Speaker 4: please his father.

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Speaker 3: No, he should stay with you for that.

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Speaker 4: I know it's only September, but we're already making plans

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Speaker 4: for the holidays, and this is on my mind. For background,

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Speaker 4: Christmas Eve has always been important to my family, more

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Speaker 4: important than the day itself. We always had a huge

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Speaker 4: get to get there with extended family, and it was

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Speaker 4: understood that that night was to be spent together as

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Speaker 4: a family. My husband knows this, as we've talked about

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Speaker 4: it many times. We also typically spend Christmas with his

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Speaker 4: parents at their home. By the way, this comes from

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Speaker 4: someone and if you want to submit your own stories,

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Speaker 4: go to the r slash Okay storytime separate it. I'm Sophia,

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Speaker 4: I'm Carly, and we're here to give good advice. Goofily,

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Speaker 4: but we don't have all the answers. We only know

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Speaker 4: what we do, so let us know what you would do.

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Speaker 3: In the comments new theory, his dad Sanna, He's.

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Speaker 4: Like, I, babe, I'm just so busy Christmas weird.

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Speaker 3: Tell me my dad just gets really busy.

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Speaker 4: He's so and he really it's the family business boom.

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Speaker 4: The issue I have is that every year he and

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Speaker 4: his family go to church there are no quotes I'd

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Speaker 4: added on Christmas Eve and spend several hours there, leaving

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Speaker 4: our child and me alone. The in law's church is

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Speaker 4: an wheelchair accessible and our son uses one. This has

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Speaker 4: happened every year we've spent Christmas with them, probably a

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Speaker 4: dozen times now. I've explained to my husband how sad

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Speaker 4: it makes me to be left alone on the most

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Speaker 4: important night of the holidays, and how frustrating it is

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Speaker 4: to be left out. He says he understands, and he

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Speaker 4: promised many times to stay with us and let his

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Speaker 4: parents go by themselves. FYI, he's an atheist and it's

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Speaker 4: not a religious issue for him. He says. He just

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Speaker 4: likes the music to be fair. Okay, music kind of

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Speaker 4: slaps on a Christmas Eve Mass.

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Speaker 3: I have no idea, but I feel like we could

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Speaker 3: play that at home.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, my music kind of Nah, it's something about being

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Speaker 4: an This is all I'll give him. I don't. I

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Speaker 4: am no longer religious after having gone through eighteen years

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Speaker 4: of Catholic school. However, I love going to a Christmas

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Speaker 4: Eve Mass. Could be it's great.

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Speaker 3: Could we not find a church that's wheelchair accessible? And

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Speaker 3: then as a family, See, I don't.

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Speaker 4: Support him in you know, his family, but I understand

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Speaker 4: the love of the music because it's kind of like

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Speaker 4: going to a concert.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, for reference, I've never been to church.

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Speaker 4: Got to go to a Christmas e mess.

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Speaker 3: I'm good.

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Speaker 4: The first year he made this promise, he renegged right

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Speaker 4: before they were supposed to leave, saying he wanted to

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Speaker 4: go in the moment, I was too upset to say

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Speaker 4: anything my fault, so he went. When we were on

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Speaker 4: our way home on Boxing Day, I tried to explain

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Speaker 4: why I was so angry about him breaking his promise,

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Speaker 4: and he seemed confused. Apparently am I not insisting he

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Speaker 4: stay and meant it wasn't actually that important to me.

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Speaker 4: We talked about it and he promised it wouldn't happen again.

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Speaker 4: Another year's father announced that he wanted everyone who could

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Speaker 4: come to come to church. Our son could not go,

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Speaker 4: and either my husband or I had to stay with him.

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Speaker 4: So it was obvious what he meant. I reminded my

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Speaker 4: husband of his promise, and he agreed to stay with us.

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Speaker 4: As his parents were getting ready to leave, his father

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Speaker 4: asked why he wasn't ready, and my husband said he'd

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Speaker 4: be staying with me. His father had a tantrum instead

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Speaker 4: of telling the truth, that it wasn't fair our son

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Speaker 4: and I were being left behind and that I asked

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Speaker 4: him to stay. My husband said we were cooking and

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Speaker 4: if they wanted dinner ready, we needed to cook. Did

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Speaker 4: I mention I always make dinner?

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Speaker 6: Well?

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Speaker 4: His father lost it, full on Toddler style, foot stamping

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Speaker 4: and saying.

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Speaker 1: But I thought I wanted that is.

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Speaker 4: Full on Toddler style. I cried, His mother cried. His

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Speaker 4: father said, my husband was corrects. This is your your grandfather.

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Speaker 4: I mean, sorry, not your grandfather. Your father in law

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Speaker 4: is being like a.

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Speaker 3: Child, right, Your child is handling this better than your father. Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, he's literally going I didn't want to bother just

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Speaker 4: Grismas Grimace, yeah, or he's Santa.

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Speaker 3: And they're actually going in the North Pole, which should

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Speaker 3: be wheelchair exist.

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Speaker 4: It should be come on, Santa, do better. I should

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Speaker 4: have put my foot down, but at that point I

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Speaker 4: was too sad to fight, so we went and yet again,

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Speaker 4: our son and I spent Christmas Eve alone. Last year,

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Speaker 4: my in laws were away and we spent the holiday

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Speaker 4: at home. It was bliss For the first time in years,

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Speaker 4: we were actually together on Christmas Eve.

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Speaker 3: He didn't miss his little Christmas song.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: But the holidays are coming again, and this year we're

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Speaker 4: spending it with them again. Now there's one major change

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Speaker 4: this year. We're celebrating at our house, not theirs. Okay,

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Speaker 4: I fully expect my father in law will insist on

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Speaker 4: attending church here and I have zero interest in going.

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Speaker 4: Even if we can find one our son can attend.

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Speaker 4: I've done some research and the local church of my

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Speaker 4: in law's denomination asks that disruptive children stay in a

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Speaker 4: separate area, meaning our son and I would still be

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Speaker 4: on our own, just in the same building as my husband.

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Speaker 4: Why I don't think that they I mean my assumption.

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Speaker 3: There is there's gonna be a little bit like maybe

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Speaker 3: something where he's like talking.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, well in that case, Yeah, What I would

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Speaker 4: like is for us to tell my in law is that,

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Speaker 4: of course they're welcome to attend church, but we, my

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Speaker 4: husband's son and I are staying home. But I know

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Speaker 4: my father in law will have a fit, and even

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Speaker 4: if my husband promises to stay with us, he'll probably

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Speaker 4: cave under his father's pressure. How would you handle this?

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Speaker 4: And there are some comments, but uh, what do you do?

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Speaker 3: I mean, is there any compromise of like, if we

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Speaker 3: do go to the church, husband also has to stay

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Speaker 3: in the other room with you.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but maybe i'd say, well, I think the

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Speaker 4: same deal of the dad, but I want to.

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Speaker 6: Sand next to you.

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Speaker 3: It's not fair, like I don't know, whole family goes

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Speaker 3: into that other room.

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Speaker 4: Then yeah, and then he's like, but I want to

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Speaker 4: listen to music because I so we have in the

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Speaker 4: church that I went to growing up, you have basically

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Speaker 4: it's like a big church, and then the altar area

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Speaker 4: and then right over here is like a little enclosed

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Speaker 4: room with a glass thing and the speakers and that's

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Speaker 4: where all like the kids, you know, kids, I've seen some. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: and so I'm assuming it's something like that, in which case,

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Speaker 4: you know, you still have a good view. But it

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Speaker 4: seems like op rightfully so doesn't want to go at all,

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Speaker 4: which is totally fair. Yeah. So I think the issue

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Speaker 4: here is how do I get my husband to listen

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Speaker 4: to me? And that is tricky because you've expressed your

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Speaker 4: feelings and he still doesn't.

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Speaker 3: Like that he's not listening. I don't like that your

396
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Speaker 3: in laws are seemingly so inconsiderate of your son's disabilities

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Speaker 3: and like, yeah, leaving him behind with like no second thoughts.

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Speaker 4: No, absolutely, I think your husband is being very cowardly,

399
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Speaker 4: and I think you need to have a conversation about

400
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Speaker 4: his ability to stand up to his parents. Ye comments

401
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,760
Speaker 4: come in one, what the f he and his family

402
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Speaker 4: are all fine with abandoning his son and their grandson

403
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Speaker 4: on Christmas Eve? As if his son is not aware

404
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:20,720
Speaker 4: he is left out and not even an afterthought talk

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Speaker 4: about Christmas spirit. Comment two says, so your father in

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Speaker 4: law was cool with going away for Christmas last year

407
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Speaker 4: when he wanted to what expects his son to cater

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Speaker 4: to his needs when he's around. I would be like, sorry,

409
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Speaker 4: you ruined Christmas last year when you went away and

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Speaker 4: didn't consider being with your family. So this year we're

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Speaker 4: staying in since I'm hosting, feel free to go to church.

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Speaker 4: I mean, obviously you're not sorry he went away last year,

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Speaker 4: but he doesn't need to know that. Your husband really

414
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:51,360
Speaker 4: needs to step up to his dad. Comment three. He says,

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Speaker 4: go visit your family for Christmas Eve and leave him

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Speaker 4: to his own devices. Reply says, if it's so important,

417
00:20:57,200 --> 00:20:59,360
Speaker 4: why hasn't she gone to her family on her own?

418
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,159
Speaker 4: Only needs some info on that Either way, If the

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Speaker 4: in laws purposefully and continuously exclude Opie's handicapped child, Why

420
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Speaker 4: would she want to spend any time with them? Skip

421
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 4: Christmas too? What a doormat her kid is going to

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00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:16,680
Speaker 4: present that whole family, Opie says. I'm not in contact

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Speaker 4: with any of my own family. That's a whole other post.

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Speaker 4: And thankfully, as odd as this will sound, our kid

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Speaker 4: is special needs and that means they aren't aware of

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Speaker 4: being excluded. And there is an update, and let's get

427
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Speaker 4: into that. Well. I talked to my husband and it

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Speaker 4: didn't go very well. Well, it just doesn't seem like

429
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Speaker 4: it has ever gone very well.

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Speaker 3: Right.

431
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:39,800
Speaker 4: You've brought this up so many times and there's been

432
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Speaker 4: no change. Shocker, right, But as a bunch of people suggested,

433
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Speaker 4: I wanted to get in front of this before it

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Speaker 4: became a problem. I've gone back and reread the update

435
00:21:49,119 --> 00:21:51,359
Speaker 4: and it sounds like something out of a bad soap opera.

436
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:54,920
Speaker 4: I wish I was exaggerating, but I'm not so. I

437
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,199
Speaker 4: brought up the holidays and that his parents would be

438
00:21:57,280 --> 00:22:00,439
Speaker 4: here on Christmas Eve. I said that while of course

439
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,520
Speaker 4: his parents were welcome to attend church, I would like

440
00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 4: us to be here aka home together. I reminded him

441
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,200
Speaker 4: how important the night is to me and now being

442
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:14,199
Speaker 4: left behind while everyone else goes to church makes me

443
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:18,320
Speaker 4: feel pretty clear, I thought. He said that if his

444
00:22:18,359 --> 00:22:21,240
Speaker 4: parents came, apparently it's not a given, which surprised me.

445
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:23,520
Speaker 4: It would only be for a few hours, so it

446
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:27,200
Speaker 4: shouldn't be an issue. I was relieved, but then he

447
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:31,359
Speaker 4: kept talking. He said, besides, not like that happens a lot.

448
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:31,840
Speaker 3: No.

449
00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:35,280
Speaker 4: I just stared at him. Can we say shocked? He

450
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:37,639
Speaker 4: asked why I was looking at him that way, and

451
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,720
Speaker 4: I said there were many Christmas Eves where our son

452
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:44,160
Speaker 4: and I were alone, that it had happened two years ago.

453
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:48,320
Speaker 4: Last year's parents were away. The response I got, no, didn't.

454
00:22:48,680 --> 00:22:51,359
Speaker 4: I lost my crap. I thanked him so much for

455
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:55,760
Speaker 4: invalidating my feelings. Passive aggressive, yes, but I was pissed. No,

456
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:59,320
Speaker 4: I didn't. I just stared at him again, and he

457
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,800
Speaker 4: must have realized how angry I was, because he backtracked

458
00:23:03,119 --> 00:23:06,000
Speaker 4: and asked what I meant. I told him that when

459
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:10,960
Speaker 4: I tell him I feel a certain way alone, abandoned, unimportant,

460
00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:15,200
Speaker 4: and he tells me the situation didn't happen, that invalidates

461
00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 4: my feelings. His mouth got kind of tight and he

462
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:21,520
Speaker 4: didn't say anything. So I reminded him of his father's

463
00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:24,800
Speaker 4: tantrum and how he my husband had chosen to tell

464
00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 4: his father we were making dinner, and when his dad

465
00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:30,800
Speaker 4: flipped out, my husband ended up going anyway, despite having

466
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 4: promised he wouldn't. Then, I said, I wished in the moment,

467
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 4: I asked my father in law if he'd abandoned my

468
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:39,520
Speaker 4: mother in law on Christmas Eve, so that when he said,

469
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:42,080
Speaker 4: of course not, I could ask him why in that

470
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 4: case it was okay for his son to do it.

471
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:47,840
Speaker 4: To me, that was a suggestion here, and I totally

472
00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:51,080
Speaker 4: stole it. That seemed to hit my husband hard. It's

473
00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:53,400
Speaker 4: like he hadn't thought of it that way. He mumbled

474
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:56,040
Speaker 4: that in retrospect, it was easy to think of the

475
00:23:56,119 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 4: right thing to say. Ironic no, m So I said

476
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,720
Speaker 4: that this year things needed to be different and that

477
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 4: it was our house, our rules. He just sulked and

478
00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:09,520
Speaker 4: said he didn't even know if his parents were coming.

479
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:13,080
Speaker 4: It's probably a non issue soap opera, right. I feel

480
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 4: like I'm talking to an emotionally illiterate child. How could

481
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 4: he possibly be this clueless? Does he think my memory

482
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:22,480
Speaker 4: is going that he can rewrite the past because it

483
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:27,719
Speaker 4: makes him uncomfortable? It made me, very very angry, but

484
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:32,199
Speaker 4: I didn't back down. So was the situation resolved?

485
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:32,679
Speaker 3: No?

486
00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 4: Was it satisfying?

487
00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:35,440
Speaker 6: Heck?

488
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:38,920
Speaker 4: Yeah? Do I expect to have this conversation again? Yep,

489
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:42,399
Speaker 4: more than once. But I'm not gonna cave. You guys

490
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 4: have helped me with that. This feels so unhealthy, so bad,

491
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,439
Speaker 4: so bad, like oh, PE's leg sitting here being like

492
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 4: I'm not caving and I'm gonna win, and her husband's like,

493
00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:58,040
Speaker 4: I don't even remember. I'm I'm choosing to completely wipe

494
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:00,560
Speaker 4: the memory of me traying.

495
00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:02,800
Speaker 3: And I'm not even gonna listen to what you say

496
00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:05,199
Speaker 3: your feelings. I don't think they happened.

497
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:09,280
Speaker 4: This is bad. This is really bad. And also even

498
00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:13,800
Speaker 4: if your you know son has special needs, like when

499
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:15,320
Speaker 4: it gets to a certain point.

500
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:18,719
Speaker 3: I hated that comment. Yeah, like, well he really doesn't know,

501
00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 3: Like one, there's no way of knowing. If yeah, you

502
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:26,320
Speaker 3: don't know, you can't express that, and two like you

503
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:30,360
Speaker 3: know other people know, so like why are we just

504
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 3: being okay with it happening still? Because in like that

505
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:37,199
Speaker 3: that got to me. Yeah, comment, I don't know.

506
00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 4: I mean, obviously Opin knows a child more, but I

507
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 4: do think that there's a certain level of like anger,

508
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:45,760
Speaker 4: and uh, I'm sure.

509
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 3: That he at least kicks up on how mad his

510
00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,679
Speaker 3: mom is and that can rub off onto his emotions

511
00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:52,600
Speaker 3: and his feelings.

512
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:56,240
Speaker 4: And yes, I would, I would think. But either way,

513
00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:58,120
Speaker 4: this isn't healthy and I think you need a professional

514
00:25:58,200 --> 00:25:59,800
Speaker 4: step in and mediate here.

515
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,159
Speaker 3: I'm a little sad because I thought that maybe this

516
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:04,600
Speaker 3: was last Christmas and we'd have a response. But I'm

517
00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:05,840
Speaker 3: fearing that maybe it's.

518
00:26:05,680 --> 00:26:08,640
Speaker 4: For this, it's for the Yeah, I think you're right.

519
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,320
Speaker 4: If his parents come and they go to church and

520
00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:14,400
Speaker 4: he starts to waiver, I'm going to throw the biggest

521
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:15,960
Speaker 4: hissy fit they've ever seen.

522
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:16,399
Speaker 3: Good.

523
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:19,399
Speaker 4: I will call his father on his behavior. I'll remind

524
00:26:19,440 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 4: them that they had their chance to celebrate with their

525
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 4: kids the way they wanted and now it's our turn.

526
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:27,919
Speaker 4: Another suggestion from here, I'll tell my husband loudly that

527
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:29,760
Speaker 4: he promised not to do this again and that he

528
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:32,879
Speaker 4: was breaking that promise again, and I'll do it in

529
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:35,680
Speaker 4: front of his parents. I'm not gonna threaten to leave him,

530
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:38,560
Speaker 4: despite what some people suggest, because he's a good man

531
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,760
Speaker 4: and we love each other. He's just got blinders on

532
00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 4: about this. For whatever reason, Christmas Eve is just a

533
00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 4: weak point for him. But I'm not letting this go

534
00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:51,240
Speaker 4: so thanks Reddit for helping me with my spine. Ah Man,

535
00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:54,080
Speaker 4: I do think that like Op is absolutely in the

536
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 4: right for how she is feeling. I just don't think

537
00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:59,400
Speaker 4: that the way that you're going about it is going

538
00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:01,959
Speaker 4: to be the most defective. But that is the end

539
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:05,199
Speaker 4: of that story. And maybe we'll find out this Christmas.

540
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:11,119
Speaker 4: But uh, for now, that's all we've got John here.

541
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:12,920
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to this juicy story, but a

542
00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:14,879
Speaker 1: quick free even of break of ads from our sponsors.

543
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:18,760
Speaker 3: My husband left me because I couldn't keep the house

544
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 3: spotless after giving birth.

545
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:23,160
Speaker 4: Get out of her house.

546
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:26,960
Speaker 3: I, twenty four female, need some outside perspective here. I

547
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 3: have never been much of a cleaner. My mother in

548
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:32,560
Speaker 3: law is in neat freak to the point she makes

549
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 3: herself miserable. She declutters things she actually loves, and her

550
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:40,360
Speaker 3: home looks like no one lives in it. She has

551
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:43,520
Speaker 3: complained to me multiple times about how tired she is

552
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:46,200
Speaker 3: and wishes she could just take a nap every once

553
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 3: in a while. My husband, twenty four male, is her

554
00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:53,800
Speaker 3: youngest and claims to not remember his childhood, but says

555
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 3: he remembers his house always being as spotless as his

556
00:27:56,920 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 3: mother's home is now. By the way, this comes from

557
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 3: Throwaway fifty seven sixty seven thirty nine four and if

558
00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:06,280
Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, go to the

559
00:28:06,359 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 3: r slash okay storytime subreddit. I'm Carly, I'm Sophia, and

560
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 3: we're here to give good advice goofully, But we don't

561
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,479
Speaker 3: have all the answers. We only know what we would do,

562
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,280
Speaker 3: So let us know what you would do in the comments.

563
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:21,080
Speaker 3: As Opie says in an argument where he told me

564
00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 3: I am not doing enough, I told him, you try

565
00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:27,480
Speaker 3: keeping the house clean with a toddler, and he told

566
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 3: me that plenty of women do it. So I told

567
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,399
Speaker 3: him that if he wants that, he should go be

568
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,919
Speaker 3: with one of those other women. Yes, I am not

569
00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 3: wasting time making myself miserable. I'm already stretched too thin.

570
00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:43,240
Speaker 3: He claimed in that argument that he didn't realize how

571
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:47,000
Speaker 3: overworked I was and that he was sorry, but more

572
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:50,200
Speaker 3: recently brought it up again that I just don't do

573
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:53,840
Speaker 3: as much as every other woman. I am his first

574
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 3: real relationship.

575
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, yep, I can see that.

576
00:28:58,160 --> 00:28:58,400
Speaker 3: Yep.

577
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,200
Speaker 4: He's like all of the women on the TV screen

578
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:06,960
Speaker 4: spots I've been watching I dream of Genie and uh Bewitched,

579
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:09,840
Speaker 4: and they're all able to They're like clean the house.

580
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 3: It's almost like they're magical or something.

581
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 4: I do it.

582
00:29:13,760 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 3: He has no idea that there's actual magic in the show.

583
00:29:16,320 --> 00:29:18,600
Speaker 4: He keeps walking out of the room every time they do. Imagine.

584
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 3: Before me, he had a month long affair with a

585
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:25,760
Speaker 3: married woman who apparently did all the cooking and cleaning.

586
00:29:26,040 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 4: That you know what impressive that she did all that

587
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:31,640
Speaker 4: and made time for an affair. She's a terrible person

588
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:32,160
Speaker 4: for that, but.

589
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:34,920
Speaker 3: You know, and he's terrible if he knew about the

590
00:29:35,000 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 3: offs of that about the husband.

591
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:38,920
Speaker 4: But time management impressive.

592
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:41,920
Speaker 3: When we got together, I showed him my messy room.

593
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:44,120
Speaker 3: I told him I had no desire to spend my

594
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 3: time making sure everything was spotless. That lived in was

595
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 3: much more of my style. And I already had a

596
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:55,120
Speaker 3: toddler who made continuous messes daily. My priority was playing

597
00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:58,760
Speaker 3: with her, not cleaning up after her. While I still

598
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 3: did clean every day. Toddlers are a lot faster than

599
00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 3: they look. He said that was fine. We discussed that

600
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:08,280
Speaker 3: if the house ever gets unmanageable. We would hire a

601
00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 3: service as my husband could afford it.

602
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,120
Speaker 4: That's what I was thinking. If he really truly wants

603
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:15,320
Speaker 4: the house to look a certain way and his wife

604
00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:18,480
Speaker 4: is overwhelmed, then let's hire someone if we can afford. Like,

605
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 4: if we can afford it, let's just, you know, get

606
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 4: rid of the argument entirely.

607
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:28,200
Speaker 3: Here's where the conflict arose. I am eleven weeks postpartum.

608
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 3: My pregnancies are pretty debilitating. My first one was claimed

609
00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:36,160
Speaker 3: high risk, and I have extreme nausea all day long,

610
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,160
Speaker 3: all the way to the third trimester when it finally

611
00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:42,920
Speaker 3: slows down. Although my husband often told me I get it,

612
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 3: I don't want you lifting a thing, he never stood

613
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 3: by it. Anytime he picked up our room about once

614
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 3: a month, he would sigh and groan and give me

615
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 3: a lecture, asking are you ever going to start picking

616
00:30:55,040 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 3: up after yourself. This was a man who had promised

617
00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:00,920
Speaker 3: to give me a soft life. He swore up and

618
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,160
Speaker 3: down he didn't want me to go to work and

619
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:05,880
Speaker 3: that he wanted me to take it easy so that

620
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,640
Speaker 3: his baby and I would be okay. One that claimed

621
00:31:09,640 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 3: to appreciate how good of a mother I was When

622
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:14,200
Speaker 3: I would bring that up to him.

623
00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 4: He would backtrack. He would say, Oh.

624
00:31:17,040 --> 00:31:20,360
Speaker 3: I didn't mean now, of course, not you're pregnant, growing up.

625
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:22,600
Speaker 4: Not now, just ever.

626
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,600
Speaker 3: I would tell him that I did pick up while

627
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:28,160
Speaker 3: he was at work, but he wouldn't believe me because

628
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:32,080
Speaker 3: there were still messes. Unfortunately, kids don't stop playing work

629
00:31:32,360 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 3: just because dad is on his way home from work

630
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,800
Speaker 3: and wants a clean house when he gets home. Flash

631
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:41,880
Speaker 3: forward to being a few weeks postpartum. Unfortunately, I wound

632
00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 3: up having an emergency C section and the recovery was brutal.

633
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:49,280
Speaker 3: I thought I had experienced the most painful thing in

634
00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:53,080
Speaker 3: the world, having contractions before giving birth to my first

635
00:31:53,480 --> 00:31:56,600
Speaker 3: but the contractions and recovery this time have been so

636
00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:00,479
Speaker 3: awful that I will never have kids again. I've been

637
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:03,800
Speaker 3: through so many hard things, but this era by far

638
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:06,800
Speaker 3: has got to be the worst time of my life.

639
00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:09,440
Speaker 3: On top of the physical agony, I have also become

640
00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:13,200
Speaker 3: incredibly depressed, to the point where even if moving didn't

641
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:16,840
Speaker 3: physically hurt me so much, I mentally and emotionally have

642
00:32:17,040 --> 00:32:20,840
Speaker 3: no drive. I got an infection in my incision around

643
00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:25,000
Speaker 3: week three and went on antibiotics in week four because

644
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 3: it was hard to get to the doctors. I pushed

645
00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 3: myself physically around week six to get some stuff done

646
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 3: around the house he wouldn't help with and I pulled

647
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:38,320
Speaker 3: a muscle and experienced some hematomas, so my healing reverted.

648
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,240
Speaker 3: My husband took a pay cut right before the baby

649
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 3: was born so he could have a job that would

650
00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 3: keep him home more and that would pay for his

651
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:49,120
Speaker 3: education so he can get an even better paying job

652
00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 3: in the future. He didn't actually make as much as

653
00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 3: he claimed he did, hence why he wasn't hiring cleaning

654
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:57,720
Speaker 3: services like he said he would. I was so grateful.

655
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:00,479
Speaker 3: Money is truly the last thing on my mind when

656
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,920
Speaker 3: it comes to our family, as I have parents who

657
00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 3: can support us when times get rough. I just need

658
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 3: help raising our babies into becoming good humans. But about

659
00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:13,520
Speaker 3: five weeks after the baby was born, he got a

660
00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:17,040
Speaker 3: second job without asking me. He just told me he

661
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 3: was doing it despite my protests. So now I have

662
00:33:20,920 --> 00:33:24,240
Speaker 3: almost no help and he won't admit to that. He's

663
00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,880
Speaker 3: always too tired to do anything around the house and

664
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,080
Speaker 3: always mad if he has to go to the grocery

665
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:32,280
Speaker 3: store with us, etc. We don't live in a safe

666
00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 3: enough area for me to go by myself, although I

667
00:33:35,440 --> 00:33:38,960
Speaker 3: do out of necessity sometimes, despite having been hurt by

668
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:42,520
Speaker 3: strangers multiple times at the grocery store near me.

669
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:47,640
Speaker 4: And he's not coming with you. He's protesting going with you.

670
00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:49,880
Speaker 4: Girl knows this is not a person you want to

671
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 4: be raising a child with.

672
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:54,040
Speaker 3: We have Wick, and in our state, they don't do

673
00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 3: grocery pickup or delivery for Wick items. About two weeks ago,

674
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:01,360
Speaker 3: I discovered something about my husband, and ever since we

675
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:04,800
Speaker 3: have been separated, he is staying with his parents and

676
00:34:04,880 --> 00:34:08,520
Speaker 3: stops by for a visit every few days. I claimed

677
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:11,160
Speaker 3: I wanted a divorce at first, but it's not what

678
00:34:11,239 --> 00:34:14,240
Speaker 3: I want. I just want him to change and grow

679
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:17,560
Speaker 3: and become more loyal to me in our marriage. It

680
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:21,240
Speaker 3: wasn't cheating. All I do all day is nurse, play

681
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 3: dolls with my toddler, and feed us and change their diapers.

682
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:27,240
Speaker 3: Every time I get up to do one of those things,

683
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:30,280
Speaker 3: I've started to incorporate the habit of bringing my dishes

684
00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:32,760
Speaker 3: to the sink while I am up, or bringing toys

685
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 3: to their toy box but I am drowning. It's hard

686
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 3: to play with my daughter when I'm bursting into tears

687
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:42,080
Speaker 3: randomly throughout the day. She deserves so much more than this,

688
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,959
Speaker 3: but I am pushing myself so hard. This is all

689
00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:49,200
Speaker 3: I can give her. What do I do here? He

690
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:51,439
Speaker 3: says that I need to be working on something too,

691
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:54,440
Speaker 3: if we are going to save our marriage. So I

692
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 3: am supposed to be working on cleaning more and speaking

693
00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:02,439
Speaker 3: to him gentler, But I genuinely don't feel like that's

694
00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:03,759
Speaker 3: in my wheelhouse right now.

695
00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:08,360
Speaker 4: I hate that. The only thing that's changed, it seems,

696
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:12,160
Speaker 4: is what you need to do, right. It's like, okay, well,

697
00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:15,440
Speaker 4: so I'm supposed to be working on doing what caused

698
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 4: the fight in the first place that I don't have

699
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:19,920
Speaker 4: the bandwidth to do. And also now I have to

700
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:24,719
Speaker 4: not even I'm not even allowed to express my emotions. Yeah,

701
00:35:24,760 --> 00:35:27,600
Speaker 4: Like obviously, you know you shouldn't be yelling or anything

702
00:35:27,640 --> 00:35:30,399
Speaker 4: like that at your partner. But it seems like what

703
00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:32,239
Speaker 4: he wants you to do is shut up and do

704
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:32,840
Speaker 4: the chores.

705
00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, or he's not even having conversations with you, He's

706
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:36,560
Speaker 3: just doing things.

707
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:37,520
Speaker 4: I hate him.

708
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,200
Speaker 3: I don't like them, but I want us to stay

709
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:43,120
Speaker 3: together so bad. I just want all of our problems

710
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:46,400
Speaker 3: to go away. He's claiming other things, like I have

711
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:50,319
Speaker 3: emotionally drained him, but with no context. So I have

712
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:52,839
Speaker 3: no idea how to fix it do. I just see

713
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,319
Speaker 3: if I can push myself more and risk injury so

714
00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 3: I can get him back. No no comments comment or

715
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,839
Speaker 3: one didn't even read past the first paragraph. If other

716
00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:04,600
Speaker 3: women can do it, so can a man.

717
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:05,280
Speaker 4: Yep.

718
00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 3: If extreme cleanliness is important to him, surely you won't

719
00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:13,000
Speaker 3: stop him from cleaning. But it's not your job to

720
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:16,799
Speaker 3: satisfy his inner neat freak. You aren't his employee, and

721
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 3: he lives there too, so he's just as responsible. My

722
00:36:21,239 --> 00:36:23,600
Speaker 3: ex boyfriend was more of a neat freak than me too.

723
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:26,919
Speaker 3: He never treated me like that, though, he just used

724
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:30,480
Speaker 3: to clean more often than me. Your husband's behavior isn't

725
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:33,960
Speaker 3: okay Comment or two. If you are putting in a

726
00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:36,520
Speaker 3: good effort to clean, he can be as well. If

727
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:39,799
Speaker 3: his standards are higher, he cleans more. How do you

728
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:43,280
Speaker 3: organize chores as a family. I make a list weekly

729
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,480
Speaker 3: and he chooses some and I take the others I

730
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:49,279
Speaker 3: need done to my standards. Ope, he responds, honestly, he

731
00:36:49,400 --> 00:36:52,120
Speaker 3: is right that I don't do a lot. I probably

732
00:36:52,160 --> 00:36:54,960
Speaker 3: only cleaned for an hour a day altogether, as the

733
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:57,920
Speaker 3: stay at home spouse while I was pregnant. We were

734
00:36:57,920 --> 00:37:00,759
Speaker 3: only married three months before I got pregnant, and he

735
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 3: keeps claiming that his main issue is that I didn't

736
00:37:03,080 --> 00:37:06,080
Speaker 3: clean enough during that time, but if he wasn't home,

737
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:09,200
Speaker 3: I probably spent on average four hours of the day cleaning.

738
00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 4: Geez.

739
00:37:10,040 --> 00:37:12,080
Speaker 3: It is true that when he is home, I spend

740
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:15,000
Speaker 3: very little time cleaning, as I am focused on spending

741
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:18,920
Speaker 3: time with the family altogether, or finally getting a break

742
00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:22,040
Speaker 3: and putting my feet up, also recovering since I had

743
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:26,680
Speaker 3: major surgery eleven weeks ago aka the baby. Yeah, we

744
00:37:26,719 --> 00:37:29,360
Speaker 3: don't have a chort chart. We agreed like four weeks

745
00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:31,359
Speaker 3: ago to make one, and now has it happened yet?

746
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 4: Okay, well let's get that. Let's do it tonight. Do

747
00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 4: you go to your husband you say, we're doing this tonight.

748
00:37:37,239 --> 00:37:39,960
Speaker 3: Several months ago I made a list of everything that

749
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:42,760
Speaker 3: needed to get done in a day, week, and month

750
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:46,000
Speaker 3: so that we could evenly distribute the labor, and all

751
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,320
Speaker 3: he did was laugh and tell me he didn't believe

752
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:50,760
Speaker 3: i'd do those things because our house is still a mess.

753
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:53,959
Speaker 3: My standards are lived in, but our house was still

754
00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:54,640
Speaker 3: messier than that.

755
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:59,680
Speaker 4: I I think op is so focused on not losing

756
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:03,520
Speaker 4: this relationship that she is kind of trying to look

757
00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:08,799
Speaker 4: past all of these flaws, these many many flaws. And yes,

758
00:38:09,320 --> 00:38:12,000
Speaker 4: you know you should try and make it work if

759
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:14,799
Speaker 4: you can, because there are kids involved. Yeah, but that

760
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:19,000
Speaker 4: doesn't mean at all costs, including your own sanity and

761
00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:23,440
Speaker 4: you know, well being and just just happiness.

762
00:38:24,080 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, I fully agree. I also read the first line

763
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,560
Speaker 3: of the updates. I can't really give my yeah, but right.

764
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:34,120
Speaker 4: Now, well, let's get into the updates then. Update he

765
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:38,560
Speaker 4: asked for a divorce. WHOA, Well, uh, I guess you

766
00:38:38,560 --> 00:38:40,400
Speaker 4: guys were on your same on the same page.

767
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 3: Papers are filled out, we are filing and sending them

768
00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 3: in on his day off this week. We had a

769
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:48,919
Speaker 3: lot of other problems too, but I wanted to share

770
00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:52,319
Speaker 3: this one because it felt unfair. I honestly thought I

771
00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:55,440
Speaker 3: was going to be verbally obliterated because I know how

772
00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:58,480
Speaker 3: harsh people who like things clean can be. Thanks for

773
00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:01,560
Speaker 3: validating my feelings. I wish we could have used your advice,

774
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,400
Speaker 3: but I think it was such a big deal to

775
00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:06,040
Speaker 3: him because he just didn't love me that much. Maybe

776
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 3: I'm wrong, but it's how I feel. That's the end

777
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:09,800
Speaker 3: of that story.

778
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:12,560
Speaker 4: No, I it just feels like this was there was

779
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:13,360
Speaker 4: no effort.

780
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:18,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it just feels like he wanted a mom. Yeah,

781
00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,400
Speaker 3: and he's not listening to you. You you have a baby.

782
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 3: You tell him that you're having postpartum depression from it,

783
00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:26,959
Speaker 3: that you're really struggling, you're bursting out through tears during

784
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:28,680
Speaker 3: the day, and he's like, you need a clean more.

785
00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:31,520
Speaker 3: And he's not even cleaning.

786
00:39:31,239 --> 00:39:34,799
Speaker 4: He's not even helping. He's just he's well, first he

787
00:39:34,880 --> 00:39:38,280
Speaker 4: was working less or like or not making the money

788
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:40,560
Speaker 4: that he said he was making the clean and then

789
00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:45,080
Speaker 4: he started working more without talking to you. Yeah, so

790
00:39:45,120 --> 00:39:49,399
Speaker 4: now he can't clean you there exactly. Uh, it just yeah,

791
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:53,600
Speaker 4: I wasn't wasn't going to work out. So you know,

792
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:57,239
Speaker 4: take this as it probably sucks right now. But you

793
00:39:57,239 --> 00:39:58,960
Speaker 4: have your parents that you said you could rely on,

794
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 4: which is really good. So rely on that support system

795
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:01,680
Speaker 4: around you.

796
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:03,920
Speaker 3: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

797
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:04,680
Speaker 3: to the next one.

798
00:40:05,640 --> 00:40:08,239
Speaker 2: My best friend slept with my husband, so I got

799
00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:10,000
Speaker 2: revenge with his boss.

800
00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:14,440
Speaker 4: And I for an eye that husband for a husband healthy.

801
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:19,239
Speaker 2: My husband had a thrisome with my best friend and

802
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:22,360
Speaker 2: his girl. Best friend and I got so angry I

803
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 2: hooked up with his boss and now I regret it.

804
00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:27,439
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Excellent Wedding eight twelve,

805
00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:29,080
Speaker 2: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

806
00:40:29,120 --> 00:40:31,200
Speaker 2: to the r slash okay storytime subreddit.

807
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:34,279
Speaker 3: I'm John, I'm Sophia, I'm Carly.

808
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:37,360
Speaker 2: And we're here to give good advice gofully, but we

809
00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:39,879
Speaker 2: don't have all the answers. We only know what we do,

810
00:40:40,040 --> 00:40:41,759
Speaker 2: so let us know what you would do. In the comments, hope,

811
00:40:41,760 --> 00:40:44,279
Speaker 2: he says, my brother had to have surgery and I

812
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:46,560
Speaker 2: wanted to be there for him, so I ended up

813
00:40:46,600 --> 00:40:49,440
Speaker 2: staying about two weeks. I always knew my best friend

814
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:52,040
Speaker 2: had a thing for my husband. Oh she admitted it

815
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:55,760
Speaker 2: multiple times, YI, but I would laugh it off because

816
00:40:55,840 --> 00:41:00,600
Speaker 2: surely my married best friend wouldn't f my huden right,

817
00:41:00,800 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 2: I didn't even catch them. My husband's girl best friend

818
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:07,560
Speaker 2: is just that insane that she casually admitted it to

819
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:09,480
Speaker 2: me as I was cleaning the kitchen.

820
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 1: When I got back. I thought she was kidding. She wasn't.

821
00:41:12,520 --> 00:41:14,720
Speaker 2: I called my best friend and she denied it at first,

822
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 2: then broke down, sobbing and effing admitted to it. I

823
00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:21,360
Speaker 2: was so angry, I threw all of my husband's crap

824
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 2: into a big suitcase and tossed it on the front lawn.

825
00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:26,840
Speaker 2: I locked the doors and piled a bunch of furniture

826
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:29,320
Speaker 2: in front of them so the dumb butt could not

827
00:41:29,400 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 2: get in. When he got home, he couldn't get in,

828
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:33,840
Speaker 2: and he started panicking. He banged on the door and

829
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:36,120
Speaker 2: shouted for me to let him in I just stayed

830
00:41:36,160 --> 00:41:38,719
Speaker 2: upstairs with our dog and let him tire himself out.

831
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,359
Speaker 2: Eventually he left and stayed the night at his girl

832
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:45,640
Speaker 2: best friend's crappy apartment. They probably f'd two all the while.

833
00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:48,399
Speaker 2: He was crying over me, dumb butt. After a few

834
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:50,560
Speaker 2: weeks of him blowing up my phone and pleading with me,

835
00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:53,520
Speaker 2: I finally let him come home and we talked. He

836
00:41:53,640 --> 00:41:57,320
Speaker 2: was sobbing and apologized. Said he was a spicy sleep

837
00:41:57,680 --> 00:42:00,799
Speaker 2: regular user if you know what I mean, and needed help.

838
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:03,000
Speaker 2: I told him I wanted him to go to therapy

839
00:42:03,040 --> 00:42:05,360
Speaker 2: and us to go to couples counseling. He agreed without

840
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 2: any fight. He slept on the couch while I slept

841
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:10,400
Speaker 2: in our bedroom. My best friend hadn't even tried to

842
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:13,200
Speaker 2: contact me or apologize for being the homewrecker she is.

843
00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:15,440
Speaker 2: My husband had some sort of work dinner party a

844
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:17,680
Speaker 2: week or so later that he needed to attend, and

845
00:42:17,719 --> 00:42:20,239
Speaker 2: he invited me. This was the first time he'd ever

846
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:22,040
Speaker 2: invited me to anything like it.

847
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:23,440
Speaker 1: M We're just gonna keep going.

848
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:26,839
Speaker 2: Pretty sure it's because none of his female coworkers knew

849
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 2: he was married, or that's at least what I'm assuming

850
00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:33,080
Speaker 2: based on how shocked all of the women were to

851
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:33,520
Speaker 2: meet me.

852
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:34,800
Speaker 1: At the dinner.

853
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:39,680
Speaker 2: His boss, fifties male, was chatting with me newly divorced. Okay,

854
00:42:40,560 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 2: I asked him how that was, and made sure to

855
00:42:42,920 --> 00:42:45,319
Speaker 2: ask loud enough for my husband to hear if. We

856
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:47,719
Speaker 2: ended up chatting all night, and my husband scurried off

857
00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:49,360
Speaker 2: from the dinner table and told me that he was

858
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:52,800
Speaker 2: going home and said I should get an uber clearly.

859
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 1: Pissed off at me. Needless to say, his boss was.

860
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 2: Shocked and how he treated me, and I couldn't help

861
00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:01,239
Speaker 2: but play up the sad, lonely wife bitch. It ended

862
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:04,040
Speaker 2: with us going back to his house and hooking up.

863
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:07,239
Speaker 2: When I woke up that morning, i ubered home. Since then,

864
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,320
Speaker 2: his boss has sent flowers to our home and called

865
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:15,600
Speaker 2: me see my husband is completely aware of this, and

866
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:18,400
Speaker 2: now the regret is starting to sink in. The guilt

867
00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:20,759
Speaker 2: and worry has started to eat away at me. The

868
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:23,920
Speaker 2: revenge felt nice, but now it's clear it's eating at

869
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:25,960
Speaker 2: the both of us. I'm going to find a lawyer

870
00:43:25,960 --> 00:43:28,800
Speaker 2: and start the process soon, I assumed the divorce process.

871
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:30,640
Speaker 2: I just needed to tell all of this to someone

872
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:33,440
Speaker 2: that isn't my family because I don't even know the.

873
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:34,560
Speaker 1: First detail about this.

874
00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:37,359
Speaker 2: Quick edit forgot to add that when we had our

875
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:40,360
Speaker 2: first therapy appointment, he never showed. He was supposed to

876
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:42,400
Speaker 2: head there after visiting his sister, who lives just a

877
00:43:42,400 --> 00:43:44,640
Speaker 2: few miles from us. I sat and waited in that

878
00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:47,600
Speaker 2: office for over an hour before I just went home

879
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:51,040
Speaker 2: and saw his butt sitting on the couch texting on

880
00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:53,360
Speaker 2: his phone. He knew we had that appointment because I

881
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:55,600
Speaker 2: had texted him multiple times about it. He had no

882
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:59,120
Speaker 2: intention whatsoever to fix this, give me closure, or work

883
00:43:59,160 --> 00:44:03,320
Speaker 2: on his spice sleep habits. Comment number one, Yeah, that marriage.

884
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:04,960
Speaker 2: I hope businesses existing.

885
00:44:05,640 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 4: Yup.

886
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,040
Speaker 1: Comment number two, they certainly match.

887
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 2: Girl best friend alone might have an excuse, as a

888
00:44:12,640 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 2: husband may have been able to convince her that they

889
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:19,680
Speaker 2: had permission that could explain the casualness of the admission.

890
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:22,839
Speaker 2: Lack of guilty mind shows up that way. Everybody else

891
00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 2: acted with make of forethought or at least reckless disregard.

892
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,000
Speaker 2: If they like this kind of drama, it's fine as

893
00:44:29,040 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 2: long as no children come into the picture. If OPI

894
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,200
Speaker 2: and a husband have kids, this becomes serious. Comment number

895
00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:37,959
Speaker 2: THREESA is I hope your former best friend's husband knows

896
00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:40,120
Speaker 2: about this before he catches something from her.

897
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:41,280
Speaker 1: Ooh true.

898
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:43,919
Speaker 2: Come to number four. It's hard to find a story

899
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:47,160
Speaker 2: where every single person mentioned in it is the a hole.

900
00:44:47,440 --> 00:44:51,719
Speaker 2: But this story checks every box. We caught them all,

901
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:52,520
Speaker 2: ladies and gentlemen.

902
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,320
Speaker 1: Gotta catch them all, not just talking about checkboxes.

903
00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:59,760
Speaker 2: But someone replied to that comment literally every person mentioned

904
00:44:59,840 --> 00:45:02,600
Speaker 2: the there's not even a there's not even a coworker

905
00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:04,759
Speaker 2: in this story that isn't at least a little bit

906
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:07,720
Speaker 2: of an a hole, and a reply to that brother

907
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 2: didn't do anything except have surgery.

908
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:14,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, the brother just had surgery, and he probably stole

909
00:45:14,239 --> 00:45:15,359
Speaker 4: someone's kidney for it.

910
00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:17,040
Speaker 1: Yep, exactly.

911
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:18,760
Speaker 4: He probably a little kidney thief.

912
00:45:18,920 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 1: He wanted to just get a new kidney just for

913
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:23,160
Speaker 1: the thrill. Of it. So he just didn't even need

914
00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:23,960
Speaker 1: that kidney, just.

915
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 2: Scooped one up, you know, for a a hole dude.

916
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:30,280
Speaker 2: And someone replies to that her brother is the biggest

917
00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 2: a hole in this whole story.

918
00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:34,279
Speaker 1: If he didn't have to have his surgery, none of this.

919
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:36,600
Speaker 4: Would have happened exactly.

920
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:39,800
Speaker 2: Wait, so it was did the threesome go down during

921
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:41,200
Speaker 2: the surgery?

922
00:45:41,239 --> 00:45:41,680
Speaker 1: Is that right?

923
00:45:41,719 --> 00:45:43,840
Speaker 6: I don't know that's I think she was away for

924
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:44,440
Speaker 6: it or something.

925
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:47,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, that I feel like that's what it was. That detail.

926
00:45:47,880 --> 00:45:49,560
Speaker 4: Just a update.

927
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 2: It's been a wild few weeks. I can imagine. We

928
00:45:52,360 --> 00:45:56,080
Speaker 2: started the divorce process soon to be X moved out reluctantly,

929
00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:59,440
Speaker 2: my ad. He moved in with his girl best friend

930
00:45:59,840 --> 00:46:05,080
Speaker 2: now fiance actually, and they're expecting the baby.

931
00:46:06,120 --> 00:46:09,759
Speaker 4: I don't know how he expects to marry her if

932
00:46:09,840 --> 00:46:11,720
Speaker 4: y'all aren't even divorced legally.

933
00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:14,479
Speaker 1: I am. I've heard a lot of stories on this show.

934
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:18,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, that one sentence, he moved out, reluctantly, moved in

935
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:22,600
Speaker 2: with the new girl, best friend, they're now fiances, and

936
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:23,800
Speaker 2: they're having a baby.

937
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,359
Speaker 4: Domino's man I one after the other.

938
00:46:26,719 --> 00:46:32,280
Speaker 2: Wow, it's his I think on the who's the freaking

939
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:37,239
Speaker 2: say DNA test. Now girl best friend's parents found out

940
00:46:37,280 --> 00:46:40,200
Speaker 2: what she did, and let's just say it's not going well.

941
00:46:40,760 --> 00:46:44,520
Speaker 2: I told best friend's husband everything. He didn't believe me

942
00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:46,840
Speaker 2: at first, but after I started showing him all the

943
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:50,520
Speaker 2: texts and photos, he just broke down. He picked her out,

944
00:46:50,680 --> 00:46:53,879
Speaker 2: and she showed up with her crap, thinking I'd let

945
00:46:53,920 --> 00:46:56,479
Speaker 2: her move. In long story shorts, I had to call

946
00:46:56,560 --> 00:46:59,960
Speaker 2: the cops to get her off my property. I haven't

947
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,400
Speaker 2: kept in contact with the boss, honestly. He bought me

948
00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:05,279
Speaker 2: a few gifts, but I politely told him no. He

949
00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:07,840
Speaker 2: was pretty nice about being rejected and told me it

950
00:47:07,920 --> 00:47:11,400
Speaker 2: was worth a shot lmao. At least he took the rejection.

951
00:47:12,560 --> 00:47:15,200
Speaker 2: My family found out shortly after I made the post.

952
00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:18,440
Speaker 2: My Reddit post was blasted all over TikTok, and my

953
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:21,040
Speaker 2: sister actually send it to me talking about how wild

954
00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:22,680
Speaker 2: it was, and I had to come clean with her

955
00:47:22,719 --> 00:47:25,800
Speaker 2: a little. I have found out many things since the

956
00:47:25,840 --> 00:47:31,160
Speaker 2: process began. My husband was the butt of the office,

957
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:35,920
Speaker 2: being passed around by all of his female coworkers. Do

958
00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:40,000
Speaker 2: you know how many apologies I've received? I'll be set

959
00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:43,880
Speaker 2: for on a lifetime apologies. Oh my God, but seriously,

960
00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:46,880
Speaker 2: why does an office have that much spicy sleep? Now,

961
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,239
Speaker 2: once the divorce is finalized, I'm selling the house and

962
00:47:49,239 --> 00:47:51,920
Speaker 2: moving into something smaller. I hate big houses. I always

963
00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:54,560
Speaker 2: liked small spaces. I found a cute apartment that's a

964
00:47:54,560 --> 00:47:56,799
Speaker 2: one bed, one bath it it'd be perfect for me

965
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,080
Speaker 2: and my dog. I know the divorce is going to

966
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:02,640
Speaker 2: become nasty actually, with the girl best friend being his fiance.

967
00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:06,120
Speaker 2: Now we've already had to get a forensic accountant involved

968
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 2: since he's accusing me of stealing his money and wiring

969
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:10,360
Speaker 2: most of it into my bank account.

970
00:48:10,719 --> 00:48:11,320
Speaker 1: That was weird.

971
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:14,000
Speaker 2: Other than that, I'm doing good. I actually feel relieved,

972
00:48:14,040 --> 00:48:15,760
Speaker 2: and I'm going to start doing things that I loved.

973
00:48:15,800 --> 00:48:17,759
Speaker 2: I'm getting back into my book club. I'm going to

974
00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:20,600
Speaker 2: start exercising how I used to. I still exercise, but

975
00:48:20,600 --> 00:48:23,640
Speaker 2: stop doing it so much because he hated girls with

976
00:48:23,719 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 2: as well.

977
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:25,000
Speaker 4: I hate him.

978
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:26,840
Speaker 1: We hate you, Buster Brown.

979
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:29,880
Speaker 2: I'm going to be me again. Yes, exactly what you

980
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:33,279
Speaker 2: should do. I hope he becomes him again and finds happiness.

981
00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:36,239
Speaker 4: Truly, that is awfully nice of you.

982
00:48:37,400 --> 00:48:41,600
Speaker 1: It really has gone Yeah over the circle. This is

983
00:48:41,600 --> 00:48:41,960
Speaker 1: a got her.

984
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:45,080
Speaker 4: She had her eat prey love journey. Yeah she's good now,

985
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:49,799
Speaker 4: isn't that Reese Witherspoon movie Wild where she has a

986
00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:52,879
Speaker 4: divorce and then goes on a really long backpacking trip.

987
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:54,640
Speaker 2: We got a couple quick comments to close it out,

988
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 2: comme number one. So he moved in with a girl

989
00:48:56,560 --> 00:48:58,719
Speaker 2: best friend, yet he's getting pastor on the office like

990
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:03,240
Speaker 2: a dude. Oh, she's in for a wild ride, LAO

991
00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:05,799
Speaker 2: and OPI replied, I feel terrible for her. Actually she

992
00:49:05,920 --> 00:49:08,239
Speaker 2: doesn't know what she's getting herself into. But oh well,

993
00:49:08,600 --> 00:49:11,959
Speaker 2: hope they enjoy their little family. Comment number two says,

994
00:49:11,960 --> 00:49:14,200
Speaker 2: I haven't read your earlier posts, but it's wild how

995
00:49:14,239 --> 00:49:16,319
Speaker 2: some people are trying to make you the bad guy here.

996
00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:20,800
Speaker 2: That guy analogy was spot on. Either your ex thought

997
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:23,240
Speaker 2: he was some kind of ladies man, or that office

998
00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:26,480
Speaker 2: has seriously has boundary issues when you're finalizing divorce. Just

999
00:49:26,560 --> 00:49:30,280
Speaker 2: remind his new fiance that she's got a history of cheating,

1000
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 2: so chances are she is not special in that department.

1001
00:49:33,840 --> 00:49:36,680
Speaker 2: In final comment, date the boss, God, dang, he must

1002
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:37,359
Speaker 2: be a nice man.

1003
00:49:37,600 --> 00:49:40,560
Speaker 4: Idea. No, no, let's not listen to that comment. Don't

1004
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:42,000
Speaker 4: do that, terrible idea.

1005
00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 1: Don't do it, man. But that's it. Wow, what a frickin'.

1006
00:49:46,640 --> 00:49:48,280
Speaker 4: What a story. What a story.

1007
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam og host. We're going get back to

1008
00:49:51,239 --> 00:49:52,360
Speaker 1: these delectable stories.

1009
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:54,440
Speaker 2: But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors to

1010
00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:55,279
Speaker 2: help support the show.

1011
00:49:55,880 --> 00:49:59,319
Speaker 4: My husband cheated with my college friend and now he's

1012
00:49:59,440 --> 00:50:04,200
Speaker 4: cheating on her too. No no, yesterday, I twenty six female,

1013
00:50:04,239 --> 00:50:09,240
Speaker 4: got a haggarly DM from an old college friend Grace

1014
00:50:09,440 --> 00:50:13,640
Speaker 4: twenty seven female about my husband Roy twenty eight male.

1015
00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:15,719
Speaker 4: As far as I knew, she was living in a

1016
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:19,879
Speaker 4: different city, but apparently she's moved here about eight months ago.

1017
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:24,680
Speaker 4: She sent me screenshots of their messages and spicy texts,

1018
00:50:24,680 --> 00:50:27,719
Speaker 4: plus selfies of them after they hooked up. By the way,

1019
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:30,399
Speaker 4: this comes from Perfect Swim eighty nine to eighty one,

1020
00:50:30,480 --> 00:50:32,040
Speaker 4: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

1021
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:34,720
Speaker 4: to the r slash Okay storytime suburt it. I'm Sophia,

1022
00:50:34,840 --> 00:50:37,920
Speaker 4: I'm John, I'm Carly, and we're here to give good advice. Goofley,

1023
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,200
Speaker 4: but we don't have all the answers. We only know

1024
00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:42,359
Speaker 4: what we'd do, So let us know what you would

1025
00:50:42,400 --> 00:50:45,520
Speaker 4: do in the comments, and Op says, I've been busy

1026
00:50:45,560 --> 00:50:48,560
Speaker 4: at work and admittedly not spending as much time at home.

1027
00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:51,680
Speaker 4: But he's the love of my life and I never

1028
00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:55,080
Speaker 4: thought he could do something like this. I confronted Roy,

1029
00:50:55,239 --> 00:50:57,840
Speaker 4: and he admitted it right away. He said it was

1030
00:50:57,840 --> 00:51:01,080
Speaker 4: supposed to be one time thing. They met up for dinner.

1031
00:51:01,200 --> 00:51:05,799
Speaker 4: When she moved, things progressed and they started dating. He

1032
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:10,080
Speaker 4: was double dating. You could say, oh God, yes dating.

1033
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 4: Grace had no idea about me. He doesn't post me

1034
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:17,160
Speaker 4: on his socials because his online presence is dedicated to

1035
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:20,520
Speaker 4: his personal fitness business, so she just assumed he was

1036
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:24,360
Speaker 4: a fit, handsome, single guy. He never mentioned me once.

1037
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,600
Speaker 4: It was only when Grace started mentioning marriage and kids

1038
00:51:27,640 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 4: that Roy got nervous and dodgy, mentioning trouble with his

1039
00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:34,560
Speaker 4: ex wife if they were to get married, the ex

1040
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:38,040
Speaker 4: wife being me, his wife of four years. She brought

1041
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:41,000
Speaker 4: this up because, drum roll, I only on one hand,

1042
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:46,520
Speaker 4: she's three months pregnant. Oh god, thinking they were exclusive,

1043
00:51:46,600 --> 00:51:49,240
Speaker 4: she hadn't slept with anyone else, which means the baby

1044
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:50,200
Speaker 4: is his.

1045
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:50,840
Speaker 1: Oh no.

1046
00:51:51,280 --> 00:51:53,800
Speaker 4: She googled my name and found out that not only

1047
00:51:54,040 --> 00:51:58,040
Speaker 4: we were together, we were married four years of marriage

1048
00:51:58,040 --> 00:52:01,280
Speaker 4: and three more years of dating. Down the I told

1049
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:04,040
Speaker 4: Roy to get the f outs, and he tried to argue,

1050
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:06,719
Speaker 4: but knew he had no chance. He's staying at a

1051
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:09,520
Speaker 4: friend's house, and after lurking on Reddit for so long,

1052
00:52:10,200 --> 00:52:13,719
Speaker 4: I texted him my entire reason for out. He sent

1053
00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:16,960
Speaker 4: an apology reply, admitting to everything, so I have it

1054
00:52:17,000 --> 00:52:20,200
Speaker 4: all in writing. I'm still messaging Grace. She feels totally

1055
00:52:20,280 --> 00:52:23,480
Speaker 4: awful about the whole situation, and I really feel for her.

1056
00:52:23,760 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 4: We've actually become close in the last day or two,

1057
00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:28,600
Speaker 4: as weird as that sounds. We're both in the middle

1058
00:52:28,640 --> 00:52:31,120
Speaker 4: of some trauma and leaning on each other has helped.

1059
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 4: I'm leaving him good. That wasn't clear A Yep, it

1060
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:37,320
Speaker 4: was pretty clear.

1061
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 1: Thank God, Good job, Thank frecking God.

1062
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:42,560
Speaker 4: Grace has also said she wants nothing to do with

1063
00:52:42,680 --> 00:52:45,839
Speaker 4: Roy except child support. I texted him to come over

1064
00:52:45,920 --> 00:52:48,680
Speaker 4: tomorrow to talk, and he said he would. I contacted

1065
00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:51,319
Speaker 4: a lawyer this morning and sent her everything I have.

1066
00:52:51,640 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 4: She replied after about two hours and said this case

1067
00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:58,560
Speaker 4: wouldn't be a problem, basically a slam dunk. She also

1068
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:01,200
Speaker 4: offered to mention the case to allege in family court,

1069
00:53:01,400 --> 00:53:03,840
Speaker 4: but Grace hasn't made her mind up about that, yet

1070
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 4: she's just as overwhelmed as I am. I'm grateful I

1071
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:09,080
Speaker 4: didn't have kids with this son of a witch, and

1072
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 4: I'm still young and hot. While Roy's a gross, cheating cheater, Yeah,

1073
00:53:16,840 --> 00:53:19,719
Speaker 4: gross cheater, No one wants the gross cheater. Last night,

1074
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 4: I got into a huge argument with Roy over the phone.

1075
00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:25,120
Speaker 4: He called me a witch for breaking up with him,

1076
00:53:25,480 --> 00:53:28,319
Speaker 4: and plenty of other nasty things. Through the night, I

1077
00:53:28,440 --> 00:53:32,320
Speaker 4: was anxious and couldn't sleep. I started distancing myself from Grace.

1078
00:53:32,640 --> 00:53:36,120
Speaker 4: She sensed this, and things blew up. She went into

1079
00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:39,080
Speaker 4: a rage and told me she had known about me.

1080
00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:41,160
Speaker 1: Whose what she knew?

1081
00:53:41,160 --> 00:53:44,520
Speaker 4: I got married through mutual friends on Instagram. My profile

1082
00:53:44,680 --> 00:53:47,240
Speaker 4: is private, but friends and family posted about the wedding,

1083
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:50,960
Speaker 4: so Grace saw our wedding photos. Grace texted me this

1084
00:53:51,040 --> 00:53:54,560
Speaker 4: morning after waking up to so many texts. She called

1085
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,360
Speaker 4: me a fake witch who makes up circumstances and lies

1086
00:53:57,400 --> 00:54:00,719
Speaker 4: about details. I blocked her after that, yet I was

1087
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:03,440
Speaker 4: feeling petty from lack of sleep, so I tagged Roy

1088
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:06,520
Speaker 4: in an Instagram story, telling everyone he was a cheater,

1089
00:54:06,880 --> 00:54:10,000
Speaker 4: and a few people responded saying they unfollowed or blocked him.

1090
00:54:10,239 --> 00:54:12,680
Speaker 4: I deleted it after three hours, but I know there

1091
00:54:12,680 --> 00:54:16,160
Speaker 4: were screenshots taken and the damage has been done. He

1092
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:18,799
Speaker 4: called early this morning asking to talk, but I said

1093
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:22,120
Speaker 4: everything was better said over text, so I had receipts

1094
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 4: and he obliged. He basically said he'd accept the divorce

1095
00:54:26,080 --> 00:54:29,520
Speaker 4: and give me almost everything I asked for, namely our

1096
00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 4: TV and my car, since he contributed to some payments.

1097
00:54:33,120 --> 00:54:36,320
Speaker 4: We don't have many flashy things other than our gaming consoles,

1098
00:54:36,600 --> 00:54:39,279
Speaker 4: and neither of us are interested in the others. This

1099
00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:42,480
Speaker 4: obviously wasn't legally binding, but I imagine it's good Ammo.

1100
00:54:42,560 --> 00:54:45,359
Speaker 4: In the divorce. Roy came by before work to get

1101
00:54:45,360 --> 00:54:47,040
Speaker 4: a bunch of his things and we were able to

1102
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:51,320
Speaker 4: talk face to face. He apologized and asked, almost begged

1103
00:54:51,400 --> 00:54:55,440
Speaker 4: for my forgiveness. I politely but firmly declined. He actually

1104
00:54:55,520 --> 00:54:58,960
Speaker 4: took this pretty well. Great good on you, Roy.

1105
00:54:59,440 --> 00:55:02,280
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess there's always a time to start

1106
00:55:02,320 --> 00:55:05,040
Speaker 2: being less of a freaking dirt bag, and.

1107
00:55:05,040 --> 00:55:08,120
Speaker 4: Asked me if I had any questions. I asked him

1108
00:55:09,080 --> 00:55:12,440
Speaker 4: what they have happened? According to Roy, Grace contacted him

1109
00:55:12,480 --> 00:55:15,800
Speaker 4: before she even moved, as many suspected she knew about

1110
00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:19,160
Speaker 4: me from the beginning, but simply didn't care. And she's

1111
00:55:19,160 --> 00:55:26,319
Speaker 4: saying that you're lying about circumstances, pot meat kettle. Ooh.

1112
00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:29,080
Speaker 4: She didn't say outright that she was trying to get pregnant,

1113
00:55:29,120 --> 00:55:32,600
Speaker 4: but she gloated to her friends about having unprotected, spicy

1114
00:55:32,680 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 4: sleep with Roy many times. So it's definitely suspicious as heck.

1115
00:55:37,320 --> 00:55:40,240
Speaker 4: He said he just couldn't resist her. To be quite frank,

1116
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:43,840
Speaker 4: I'm hotter than her, there's no question. Yeah, so Pete,

1117
00:55:44,360 --> 00:55:48,759
Speaker 4: that's the energy. Hello, yay, that's the one thing about

1118
00:55:48,800 --> 00:55:50,879
Speaker 4: this whole situation that brings me a bit of fight.

1119
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:54,799
Speaker 4: Grace and Roy are apparently still in a relationship. I

1120
00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:57,880
Speaker 4: mean they're both dirt bags, so they can be in

1121
00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:00,319
Speaker 4: a little communal dirt bag together, can.

1122
00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:03,440
Speaker 1: Go to dirt bag Island. Yeah, shrounded by dirt and bag.

1123
00:56:03,280 --> 00:56:05,520
Speaker 4: Dirt bag city population too. Mm.

1124
00:56:06,040 --> 00:56:06,520
Speaker 1: Got him.

1125
00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:09,360
Speaker 4: They're planning on keeping the baby, and get this, he

1126
00:56:09,480 --> 00:56:12,960
Speaker 4: posted the gender reveal on his public instagram, like I

1127
00:56:13,040 --> 00:56:15,680
Speaker 4: never existed. He's trying to get rent money from me,

1128
00:56:15,800 --> 00:56:17,840
Speaker 4: But there's not a chance in heck I'll be given

1129
00:56:17,880 --> 00:56:20,520
Speaker 4: a cent to him. Yeah, in fact, I'll be taking

1130
00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:23,440
Speaker 4: nearly everything. He knows he doesn't stand a chance at

1131
00:56:23,440 --> 00:56:25,759
Speaker 4: getting any of the furniture I paid for or the

1132
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:29,600
Speaker 4: vinyls I bought fam I've officially cut off Grace and

1133
00:56:29,760 --> 00:56:32,600
Speaker 4: am in the process of cutting off Roy. Outside the divorce,

1134
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:35,880
Speaker 4: I'm living comfortably by myself in our apartment since I

1135
00:56:35,880 --> 00:56:38,680
Speaker 4: have a decent salary, but I let our landlord know

1136
00:56:38,760 --> 00:56:41,040
Speaker 4: I'll be ending the lease in two months. He has

1137
00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:43,440
Speaker 4: a studio available, but I'm not sure i'll take it.

1138
00:56:43,760 --> 00:56:46,240
Speaker 4: For now, I'm in contact with my lawyer who says

1139
00:56:46,280 --> 00:56:49,279
Speaker 4: this whole process can be done in six months if

1140
00:56:49,320 --> 00:56:53,520
Speaker 4: everything goes well. And there is a second updates uh heho.

1141
00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:58,960
Speaker 4: Divorce is in the works, Grace is still pregnant, and

1142
00:56:59,080 --> 00:57:03,080
Speaker 4: Roy's things are out of my house. Nice to say

1143
00:57:03,120 --> 00:57:07,160
Speaker 4: my landlord understood would be an understatement. And I'm able

1144
00:57:07,200 --> 00:57:09,759
Speaker 4: to stay in my current place. And before we get

1145
00:57:09,760 --> 00:57:13,879
Speaker 4: into this third update, any other thoughts that have hit

1146
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:14,920
Speaker 4: you, You know.

1147
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:19,400
Speaker 2: It sounds like op is doing what she should be doing,

1148
00:57:19,440 --> 00:57:22,880
Speaker 2: which is like, all right, Cyinara, freakin' see you later.

1149
00:57:23,520 --> 00:57:27,560
Speaker 1: Let me live my life, get that bag, whatever.

1150
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:30,560
Speaker 4: Trip, take the money. Yeah, go on a long trip

1151
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:35,280
Speaker 4: backpack just like Reese Witherspoon. But there is a third update,

1152
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,960
Speaker 4: let's dive in. Honestly, it was pretty painless divorce. He

1153
00:57:39,000 --> 00:57:41,400
Speaker 4: didn't fight for much, since I bought most of our stuff.

1154
00:57:41,560 --> 00:57:43,600
Speaker 4: I left our place after my lease was up and

1155
00:57:43,640 --> 00:57:46,680
Speaker 4: moved about four hours away. My work is remote now,

1156
00:57:46,720 --> 00:57:49,120
Speaker 4: so it wasn't a hard transition, and I got a

1157
00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:51,600
Speaker 4: move closer to a lot of loved ones. Roy and

1158
00:57:51,600 --> 00:57:53,880
Speaker 4: Grace are still together and they had their baby not

1159
00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:56,520
Speaker 4: too long ago. I don't keep up with their lives anymore.

1160
00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:59,040
Speaker 4: For my own piece, I've been dating around a bit,

1161
00:57:59,120 --> 00:58:01,880
Speaker 4: but not much. I've been going to therapy and working

1162
00:58:01,920 --> 00:58:04,160
Speaker 4: through a lot of the trust issues that came from this,

1163
00:58:04,720 --> 00:58:07,600
Speaker 4: but it's a slow process, so I'm not in any

1164
00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:10,080
Speaker 4: kind of place to be in a serious relationship. I

1165
00:58:10,120 --> 00:58:12,520
Speaker 4: am happy though, I don't worry about things as much.

1166
00:58:12,640 --> 00:58:15,160
Speaker 4: I'm able to get more work done and I'm able

1167
00:58:15,240 --> 00:58:17,479
Speaker 4: to have more meaningful fun with the people I love.

1168
00:58:17,720 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 4: And I'm sure you all saw that for that, So

1169
00:58:22,960 --> 00:58:25,360
Speaker 4: I'm just gonna I'm just gonna go for it.

1170
00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:26,160
Speaker 1: Give it to us.

1171
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:29,880
Speaker 4: Roy cheated on Grace. Who expected that?

1172
00:58:30,360 --> 00:58:34,440
Speaker 1: What did you think? What happened? We either gonna cheat

1173
00:58:34,960 --> 00:58:35,800
Speaker 1: and she's.

1174
00:58:35,720 --> 00:58:37,440
Speaker 4: Pregnant and she's pregnant.

1175
00:58:37,800 --> 00:58:39,600
Speaker 1: And she's pregnant.

1176
00:58:39,880 --> 00:58:42,400
Speaker 4: I found out through a friend who still follows Grace

1177
00:58:42,440 --> 00:58:45,680
Speaker 4: on socials because she made a post blasting him in

1178
00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:49,120
Speaker 4: all of his actions. Girl, get off your high horse.

1179
00:58:49,280 --> 00:58:51,880
Speaker 4: You literally knew he was married the first time around,

1180
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:53,400
Speaker 4: and then you're like, oh.

1181
00:58:53,240 --> 00:58:54,080
Speaker 3: He cheated on me.

1182
00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:58,160
Speaker 4: I never expected this, and O man, what a blast.

1183
00:58:58,760 --> 00:59:00,880
Speaker 4: This was the kind of post that once in a

1184
00:59:00,920 --> 00:59:04,760
Speaker 4: lifetime Grace aired all of their dirty laundry, and it

1185
00:59:04,960 --> 00:59:07,720
Speaker 4: was just a hell of a boast. Grace found out

1186
00:59:07,800 --> 00:59:12,280
Speaker 4: Roy had given her some STI mmmm, well, girl, you

1187
00:59:12,320 --> 00:59:14,720
Speaker 4: were having a lot of unprotected spicy sleep.

1188
00:59:14,680 --> 00:59:16,960
Speaker 1: So yeah, that can happen.

1189
00:59:17,160 --> 00:59:20,680
Speaker 4: She didn't specify which, but implied it was treatable, and

1190
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 4: for some reason she stayed with him, likely because of

1191
00:59:24,040 --> 00:59:26,880
Speaker 4: the baby they just had, but later she found out

1192
00:59:26,960 --> 00:59:31,120
Speaker 4: he'd been cheating since before she even had that baby. Anyway,

1193
00:59:31,200 --> 00:59:33,840
Speaker 4: Grace found out she was pregnant with their second baby,

1194
00:59:34,080 --> 00:59:37,600
Speaker 4: old Roy and he was excited and they went out

1195
00:59:37,640 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 4: to celebrate. Roy got a little two wasted and made

1196
00:59:40,640 --> 00:59:44,080
Speaker 4: some weird comments that made Grace think something was very wrong.

1197
00:59:44,360 --> 00:59:47,880
Speaker 4: He'd given Grace's phone passcode bold as heck, in my opinion,

1198
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:52,120
Speaker 4: And after he passed out, she checked his texts. He

1199
00:59:52,280 --> 00:59:56,160
Speaker 4: had and I quote two efing bees he was texting

1200
00:59:56,640 --> 01:00:02,600
Speaker 4: in his recent messages. Wow, I'm glad so Pee. I

1201
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:05,280
Speaker 4: won't say Grace ruined my life because she didn't. But

1202
01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:07,960
Speaker 4: she planned to separate me and Roy, and she succeeded,

1203
01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:10,360
Speaker 4: and she's getting her just desserts. She's going to be

1204
01:00:10,400 --> 01:00:13,080
Speaker 4: a single mother to two young children. And it's because

1205
01:00:13,120 --> 01:00:16,560
Speaker 4: she was so adamant about being with my ex, even

1206
01:00:16,600 --> 01:00:18,920
Speaker 4: though he was a cheater. He got a taste of

1207
01:00:18,920 --> 01:00:24,480
Speaker 4: infidelity and couldn't stop. And now she's suffering. Any final thoughts.

1208
01:00:24,400 --> 01:00:29,360
Speaker 1: I'm afraid. I'm afraid, afraid of whatever morsel is left here.

1209
01:00:29,520 --> 01:00:34,320
Speaker 4: I'm scared, terrified. I'm scared. This isn't good.

1210
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:36,880
Speaker 1: But I think, oh, Pee's fine.

1211
01:00:36,360 --> 01:00:38,480
Speaker 3: I think, oh He's gonna be just fine.

1212
01:00:38,600 --> 01:00:41,040
Speaker 4: I hated for Grace's kids. We'll grow up with a

1213
01:00:41,040 --> 01:00:43,720
Speaker 4: mom who craves chaos, and they won't get the life

1214
01:00:43,760 --> 01:00:46,840
Speaker 4: they deserve. I fear her second baby will inherit whatever

1215
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:50,240
Speaker 4: STI Roy gave Grace. I hope not. I ope and

1216
01:00:50,280 --> 01:00:53,720
Speaker 4: pray Roy will take responsibility for his children because we

1217
01:00:53,800 --> 01:00:56,440
Speaker 4: wanted kids at some point, and he's great with kids,

1218
01:00:56,960 --> 01:00:59,920
Speaker 4: but oh man, I dodge so many bullets. I feel

1219
01:01:00,160 --> 01:01:02,840
Speaker 4: kind of bad that I'm happy, but karma came for them,

1220
01:01:02,920 --> 01:01:05,120
Speaker 4: and I'm not one to doubt the universe's way of

1221
01:01:05,200 --> 01:01:08,800
Speaker 4: balancing itself. I'll just keep going to therapy, doing my thing,

1222
01:01:09,200 --> 01:01:11,480
Speaker 4: and keeping my peace as always.

1223
01:01:12,200 --> 01:01:13,040
Speaker 3: I'll be just fine.

1224
01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:14,320
Speaker 4: And that's the end of that story.