Speaker 1: Maybe that's Lisa, and we're just two girls that want
Speaker 1: to have a conversation with you. Dear sixteen year old Andrea,
Speaker 1: Hey gorgeous, Dear younger Lauren. Each episode is stories from people.
Speaker 1: I would deprive myself by myself obsessively because I was
Speaker 1: eating healthy. I couldn't understand that I had a problem
Speaker 1: with food. Losing my period scared me the most. My
Speaker 1: story starts when I was around seven. That's when I
Speaker 1: started to hate my body. Body image is like our
Speaker 1: inner picture of our outer self. Healthy behaviors had a
Speaker 1: much bigger role at all health than the actual number
Speaker 1: on the scales. Internal dialogue could be so powerful and
Speaker 1: often it's puper negative and critical in a way that
Speaker 1: we wouldn't talk to other people that we care about.
Speaker 1: When you start to share your story, that gives other
Speaker 1: people the courage to share theirs. I know you would
Speaker 1: be proud now of how far you have come in
Speaker 1: your relationship to food, exercise, and to yourself. I felt freedom,
Speaker 1: I've gained relationships. I've found my true sense of self worth.
Speaker 1: There's one thing I need you to take away. You're
Speaker 1: going to be okay. Welcome back to Outweigh. Hello, it's Lisa.
Speaker 1: This is a bonus episode, so you're just getting me
Speaker 1: no Amy, and I am doing this episode on Thanksgiving,
Speaker 1: so hopefully it's Thanksgiving Day morning, Happy Thanksgiving, or happy Holiday.
Speaker 1: And really, I just wanted to provide something for you
Speaker 1: to kind of go into today feeling like your best self.
Speaker 1: Thanksgiving is a tough holiday. I know this year is
Speaker 1: still a little bit different, but all the ways we've
Speaker 1: kind of been trained to go about Thanksgiving can kind
Speaker 1: of just come up. And I want to give you
Speaker 1: all the tools that I possibly can to have a
Speaker 1: Thanksgiving that's really intentional and aligned with who you are now.
Speaker 1: I know that some of you this might be your
Speaker 1: first year kind of breaking free from the diet mindset
Speaker 1: and being in situations or around family or just Thanksgiving
Speaker 1: in general, it can be a very easy way to
Speaker 1: kind of fall into perhaps your older mindset, and so
Speaker 1: it's really important that we check ourselves and we don't
Speaker 1: normalize many of the things that we've normalized around food
Speaker 1: around holidays. So Thanksgiving is a special one for me
Speaker 1: because some of my strongest memories around my disordered eating
Speaker 1: days really center around Thanksgiving because I used to maybe
Speaker 1: I will again but obviously not with COVID. Used to
Speaker 1: go to my favorite aunt's house, my aunt Nancy up
Speaker 1: in New Hampshire, and I love her. She's kind of
Speaker 1: just like home for me. And I would bring all
Speaker 1: my own food for a year or two years, and
Speaker 1: it was kind of like everyone else's food and then
Speaker 1: Lisa's food. And while that could be fine in some instances,
Speaker 1: for me, there was so much involved with making sure
Speaker 1: that I only ate my food and no one touched
Speaker 1: my food, and bringing it from New York to New Hampshire,
Speaker 1: and then you know, preparing to eat it meant you know,
Speaker 1: saving my calories or working out extra and then I
Speaker 1: just remember most of all feeling like my head wasn't
Speaker 1: connected to anything besides the food, and I went from
Speaker 1: so hungry to so full. I couldn't even go on
Speaker 1: the family walk afterwards because I had eaten so much,
Speaker 1: which I know is very normalized for this holiday. But
Speaker 1: when we really begin to recognize that these foods don't
Speaker 1: have to be just Thanksgiving Day foods, We could eat
Speaker 1: stuffing or turkey if we like those foods any day
Speaker 1: of the year, or sweet potatoes with marshmallows if you
Speaker 1: guys do that you know, really try and expand out on.
Speaker 1: This is a holiday, yes, but what really makes it
Speaker 1: special is that it's a day to spend with your
Speaker 1: friends and family and be your best you. And that
Speaker 1: easily kind of gets lost in the shuffle if we
Speaker 1: don't check ourselves. So what I have planned today is
Speaker 1: a quick meditation to just prep you for today, kind
Speaker 1: of just center you, get you aligned, help you tap
Speaker 1: into anything that's beneath you, and then I'm going to
Speaker 1: provide some tips as to how you can really go
Speaker 1: about feeling your best today, not giving into diet culture,
Speaker 1: protecting your boundaries, and overall just being mindful of what
Speaker 1: you want to be and how to get there. So
Speaker 1: if you wouldn't mind finding a comfortable seated position wherever
Speaker 1: you are, give you a few moments to get there.
Speaker 1: It's just really important that your back is upright, so
Speaker 1: not laying down, and that you're just in a comfortable
Speaker 1: position for you. And when you're there, I just want
Speaker 1: you to start taking deep breaths through your nose, so
Speaker 1: inhaling through your nose and then exhaling through your nose
Speaker 1: so your lips are comfortably pressed together as you elongate
Speaker 1: those inhales and the excels, and as your breath deepens,
Speaker 1: I want you to scan your body for any tension.
Speaker 1: Maybe wiggle your jaw, jaws hold a lot of tension.
Speaker 1: Maybe even stick your tongue out, opening your mouth, loosening
Speaker 1: it up, whatever you need to do. Head on into
Speaker 1: your shoulders, lifting them up to your ears and then
Speaker 1: letting them drop far away. Breathing and scanning your body.
Speaker 1: And I want you to bring a little bit of
Speaker 1: attention to your belly and on the inhale, make it
Speaker 1: really deep and notice as your belly expands and takes
Speaker 1: up space. On the exhale it falls. Now do your
Speaker 1: best to not judge that feeling. On the inhale, your
Speaker 1: belly expands and takes up all the space, and on
Speaker 1: the exhale it relaxes. Because the belly can be a
Speaker 1: little bit triggering. And when you just go ahead and
Speaker 1: place your hands on your belly inhale, let it take
Speaker 1: up space exhale, let it relax. And then maybe bringing
Speaker 1: some attention to more neutral areas like your ankles and
Speaker 1: your wrists, feel free to roll them out a little bit,
Speaker 1: letting that synovial fluid get through our joints, nourishing your
Speaker 1: body with breath and gentle movement, and just do one
Speaker 1: final scan of your entire body to see where you're
Speaker 1: holding tension and exhale release. Hopefully, now you've gotten comfortable
Speaker 1: with stillness, you could feel the nourishing breath going into
Speaker 1: your body and out of your body. And I want
Speaker 1: you to take a moment and think about what your
Speaker 1: intention is for today. Maybe start it with I want
Speaker 1: to feel blank. And your intention should really just be
Speaker 1: what you want to feel today, what do you want
Speaker 1: to get out of today? And just give me one
Speaker 1: favor and keep it focused on for just today, so
Speaker 1: no fears getting in the way of how you're going
Speaker 1: to keep this going for the rest of your life
Speaker 1: or even to tomorrow. So just for today, I will feel.
Speaker 1: That word could be anything, really, but some ideas are RESTful, calm, peaceful, joyful, grateful,
Speaker 1: maybe connected either to yourself or to the people around you.
Speaker 1: Whatever it is, it's your intention for the day. Repeat
Speaker 1: it a few times, just for today, I'll feel Just
Speaker 1: for today, I'll feel just for today, I'll feel. Repeating
Speaker 1: it in your own head a few times, imagining what
Speaker 1: it feels like for that adjective to take up space
Speaker 1: in every single cell in every part of your body.
Speaker 1: Imagine joy, gratitude, feelings of deep connection, peacefulness or calm,
Speaker 1: and every cell of your body returning to your breath
Speaker 1: for a few deep breaths, in through the nose and
Speaker 1: out through the nose, long inhales, long exhals, and just
Speaker 1: one more time here inhale that intention. Just for today,
Speaker 1: I will feel and exhale any boundaries that might get
Speaker 1: in the way, or tension that you're already expecting. Just
Speaker 1: for today, I will feel, I let go of anything
Speaker 1: that could get in the way, and just let your
Speaker 1: breath return to its natural rhythm, feeling relaxed, safe, self supported,
Speaker 1: empowered from within to take yourself into living a life
Speaker 1: in line with your intentions. One deep breath to just
Speaker 1: close this out, maybe in through the nose and this
Speaker 1: time out through the mouth, as if you are fogging
Speaker 1: up the window, so your mouth opens for this one
Speaker 1: in through the nose, mouth opens, Feel free to use
Speaker 1: that hot noise, so one more time together, in through
Speaker 1: the nose, out through the mouth. And now either open
Speaker 1: a journal or your notes page of your phone and
Speaker 1: write down what your intention is. Just for today, I
Speaker 1: will feel some things that can or will get in
Speaker 1: the way are It could be people, could be situations,
Speaker 1: it could be your own self limiting thoughts. Write them down.
Speaker 1: We are prepared for what can get in our way
Speaker 1: of our intention. We expect a wrench to be thrown
Speaker 1: at us only so we can be tested to see
Speaker 1: if we can make our way back to our intention.
Speaker 1: And now we're gonna come up with your own game plan.
Speaker 1: If you feel yourself moving away from this intention, how
Speaker 1: will you return to the state that you want to
Speaker 1: be in. How will you return, just for today to
Speaker 1: that intention. Maybe come up with a word. Maybe your
Speaker 1: intention is the word or a gesture that can help
Speaker 1: you tap back in. So maybe just repeating that word
Speaker 1: that you want peaceful, peaceful, peaceful, We're tapping into that
Speaker 1: deep inhale and exhale that we practiced just through the nose.
Speaker 1: That's a great way to kind of okay, I'm being triggered.
Speaker 1: Let me just take a breath here and recenter. Or
Speaker 1: maybe it's just taking a moment to place your hand
Speaker 1: over your heart and just recentering yourself, choosing yourself, Choose
Speaker 1: how you will be guided into today, and remember to
Speaker 1: choose yourself over and over and over again. Great job.
Speaker 1: So now I just want to take a few minutes
Speaker 1: to give you a few tips for the day. I
Speaker 1: used to lead these webinars on mindful eating over the
Speaker 1: last few years, and I didn't do one for this
Speaker 1: year because I figured could bring it here, uh in
Speaker 1: a format that you can listen on your own time,
Speaker 1: and you can take notes, and you can do it
Speaker 1: however you please. So the first tip that I have
Speaker 1: for you, you've already done, and that's to set an
Speaker 1: intention way ago. You've already set your intention, you know
Speaker 1: what you want to get out of today, and you
Speaker 1: can really be on the lookout for anything that could
Speaker 1: get in the way of that second piece of information
Speaker 1: I want to give you or remind you. Talked about
Speaker 1: a little bit in the beginning, but I want to
Speaker 1: remind you that we have this idea that foods should
Speaker 1: be exclusive to when they should be eaten, whether that's
Speaker 1: you know, pancakes are only for breakfast on Sunday or
Speaker 1: breakfast Monday through Friday should be oats and eggs, and
Speaker 1: dinner should be a vegetable and a protein. I want
Speaker 1: you to really shake that up in general, but for
Speaker 1: this holiday, I want to be a little bit more
Speaker 1: specific and remind you that you could have those candied
Speaker 1: yams any day. You could have the apple pie or
Speaker 1: the pumpkin pie any day, and we have this idea
Speaker 1: that we only have this one chance to have it.
Speaker 1: But that's just something that we made up, especially during
Speaker 1: the fall seasons when these flavors are abundant. Just remember
Speaker 1: you can have them any day. And that's not to
Speaker 1: say that you shouldn't have them today, because you could
Speaker 1: have them any day. But I want to remove that
Speaker 1: scarcity mindset that we sometimes bring into holiday as this
Speaker 1: is my one chance, because that is going to again
Speaker 1: kind of take you away from that intention of how
Speaker 1: you want to feel today. Of course, if you're just
Speaker 1: you know, I gotta get all this food, and I
Speaker 1: gotta get it in before Thanksgivings up, and I don't
Speaker 1: get to have it for another year, your focus is
Speaker 1: then being shifted a lot onto the food where it
Speaker 1: doesn't have to be. So one of the ways to
Speaker 1: stay calm is to remember I can have this cake
Speaker 1: today and I can also have it tomorrow. So see
Speaker 1: if that mindset helps you a little bit, all right,
Speaker 1: next tip is to remember two things. A you don't
Speaker 1: need to save your calories for the meal, and you
Speaker 1: also don't need to earn them by working out either
Speaker 1: before or after. Right, you need food and nourishment every
Speaker 1: single day, and the worst thing we could actually do
Speaker 1: is save our calories because then we go in absolutely starving. Again,
Speaker 1: that's going to interrupt your intention. If you, for example,
Speaker 1: chose that you wanted to be calm or connected, this
Speaker 1: can help you shift back into that knowing that if
Speaker 1: you show up to this meal or you enter Thanksgiving
Speaker 1: dinner absolutely starving, you're gonna be so focused on the
Speaker 1: food and getting it to your belly that you're not
Speaker 1: going to be calm or connected. So chances are if
Speaker 1: you chose any of those words, that's going to be
Speaker 1: an easy one to return to to interrupt. I want
Speaker 1: to feel calm and connected today. Therefore, maybe I should
Speaker 1: have my normal meals or at least have a snack
Speaker 1: before I make it to this meal. Super important to
Speaker 1: you know, have your normal breakfast if you're a breakfast person,
Speaker 1: or your lunch if you're a lunch person. H everyone's
Speaker 1: a lunch person. Breakfast is a little bit more controversial,
Speaker 1: but you know, make sure that you are eating regularly,
Speaker 1: and i'd say within the last two hours before your dinner,
Speaker 1: make sure that you have something in your stomach so
Speaker 1: that you are walking into this meal as your highest
Speaker 1: self connected to that intention. Okay, next tip is don't
Speaker 1: beat around the bush. I think I talked about this
Speaker 1: on Amy's podcast for Things a while ago, but it's
Speaker 1: an important one. Nonetheless. I see it all the time.
Speaker 1: People want food, whether that's dessert or stuffing, right, and
Speaker 1: instead of having that, they'll say, oh, I won't have that,
Speaker 1: I'll just have this instead, or I'll have extra of this.
Speaker 1: But usually truth is, when we do that, we try
Speaker 1: to distract ourselves from what we really want. We end
Speaker 1: up having the distraction food and then still thinking about
Speaker 1: the original food that we wanted, so that we're having
Speaker 1: all of it, which is fine, except if you're getting
Speaker 1: uncomfortably full. Wouldn't it be more enjoyable to satisfy yourself
Speaker 1: with what the food is that you want, So no
Speaker 1: beating around the bush. I want you to say what
Speaker 1: do I want and have that. It's really a kind
Speaker 1: of as simple as that, going for what you want,
Speaker 1: not making yourself run around and have a headache over it.
Speaker 1: Just having what you want a holiday like this is
Speaker 1: a really empowering one to kind of step into that
Speaker 1: power and recognize, I want this food. I'm going to
Speaker 1: have this food and see what happens. Reminder to always
Speaker 1: bring curiosity to these things. That is how we explore
Speaker 1: and get to know ourselves. And that's also how we
Speaker 1: displace judgment and shame and guilt. Curiosity is the cure
Speaker 1: for just about everything. All right. This is a building
Speaker 1: a plate tip, and I want you to take a
Speaker 1: moment when you arrive, or when you go up to
Speaker 1: the buffet line, or before you build your plate in general,
Speaker 1: to really take a good look around. Use your senses
Speaker 1: like your eyes to look at the delicious food, your
Speaker 1: senses of smell, to take in the aromas, and ask
Speaker 1: yourself what do I want. Usually we come in starving, right,
Speaker 1: we're like just anything we can get on our plate,
Speaker 1: We're piling it on. We have that mindset of I
Speaker 1: can only eat these foods once. But with all of
Speaker 1: that out of the way, we could actually evaluate what's
Speaker 1: in front of us, ask ourselves what looks good, and
Speaker 1: then build the plate around that. So we've slowed the
Speaker 1: process down a lot, and I want to really urge
Speaker 1: you to not make that decision right now. So I
Speaker 1: don't want you to decide what you're having before you
Speaker 1: get there. I want you to use your eyes and
Speaker 1: your nose to help you learn from your body what
Speaker 1: it wants. And the key here is again not to
Speaker 1: have that plan, because I want your body to be
Speaker 1: the guide. And it's very possible that when you do this,
Speaker 1: you bring again curiosity to it. So maybe you're not
Speaker 1: a sweet potato person, but today those sweet potatoes smell
Speaker 1: really good and you want to give them a I.
Speaker 1: Or maybe you want to challenge yourself because sweet potatoes
Speaker 1: were a fear food of yours, but today this is
Speaker 1: a beautiful time to challenge that. Or maybe you normally
Speaker 1: love Brussels sprouts, but this year, I don't know. They're
Speaker 1: just not calling your name. Something about the way they're cooked.
Speaker 1: They don't smell as good as they usually smell, or
Speaker 1: they don't look as good as they usually look. Just
Speaker 1: too random examples. But remember that only you can be
Speaker 1: your own guide, and the best way to do that
Speaker 1: is to not show up absolutely starving on empty saving
Speaker 1: and earning your calories, and instead just show up having
Speaker 1: eaten something in the near ish future, calm, collected, intentional
Speaker 1: honoring what your body wants, knowing that you could always
Speaker 1: have whatever you didn't get, maybe on the second run
Speaker 1: up too, if you have the opportunity. So those are
Speaker 1: some of my food tips, and they have been super
Speaker 1: helpful to me in the past to just kind of
Speaker 1: calm down. There can be a lot of energy around family,
Speaker 1: even if it's not a big party this year, it's
Speaker 1: still you know, family can bring big energy, So it's
Speaker 1: a good way to kind of scale it back, stay
Speaker 1: connected to my inten chin, and feel comfortable in my body,
Speaker 1: all while enjoying delicious food. I like to always establish
Speaker 1: a safe spot, so this was such a big part
Speaker 1: of my quote unquote recovery. Showing up to meals noticing
Speaker 1: when I was getting triggered or tense around certain conversations
Speaker 1: or people and instead of reacting or continuing to shove
Speaker 1: food down my face but not really being connected to
Speaker 1: how it feels or how it tastes. I don't know
Speaker 1: if anybody else gets nervous energy like that, but I
Speaker 1: used to get nervous energy and then just eat really
Speaker 1: quickly and just not notice anything from the eating except
Speaker 1: for just feeling really full, kind of like emotional eating
Speaker 1: in some instances. But this really robs us from being
Speaker 1: connected to our bodies and our intentions. So when I
Speaker 1: start to feel overwhelmed, where I call it itchy sometimes
Speaker 1: like oh, this conversation is making me itchy and reactive
Speaker 1: and angry, I'll go to my safe spot. Typically in
Speaker 1: the past it's just been the bathroom, and it's one
Speaker 1: minute to just either look at myself in the mirror,
Speaker 1: give myself a pep talk. Lisa, you got this. Your
Speaker 1: intention is this. You can do this. You know it
Speaker 1: sounds funny, but it works. I'll just take a few
Speaker 1: deep breaths there. I love square breathing, and if you're
Speaker 1: not familiar, square breathing is done like this. You inhale
Speaker 1: for four seconds, hold it for four seconds. Exhale for
Speaker 1: four seconds, hold it for four seconds. So take a moment. Actually,
Speaker 1: let's just do that together. Inhale for four seconds one,
Speaker 1: two three four. Now hold your breath for four seconds
Speaker 1: one two three four. Exhale for four three two one,
Speaker 1: Now hold for four three two one and repeat that
Speaker 1: with the holds with the inhales a few times. And
Speaker 1: just a few times completely shifts our bodies out of
Speaker 1: what the state it gets to when it is triggered,
Speaker 1: which is usually fight or flight response, and that's the
Speaker 1: opposite for rest and digest. So when we take a
Speaker 1: few breaths to get back to baseline, we're really preparing
Speaker 1: our bodies to eat because we are bringing the blood
Speaker 1: flow back to where it needs to be, where it
Speaker 1: moves away from when we are emotionally triggered, believe it
Speaker 1: or not. Next tip, but that's kind of a newer one.
Speaker 1: But on my podcast, The Truth is Life, I had
Speaker 1: Kelsey Patel on Kelsey is a racky Master and Raky
Speaker 1: is just basically transferring energy and which she gave us
Speaker 1: great tips on how to be our own healers. But
Speaker 1: one of the things Kelsey Patel always does I've had
Speaker 1: meals with her, is she Raky's her food. Now, if
Speaker 1: this isn't for you, that's fine, but anyone can do it,
Speaker 1: by the way, you don't have to be a racky Master.
Speaker 1: And it's just one of those ways to bring intention
Speaker 1: and gratitude into your life. And it's a practice that
Speaker 1: if I'm ever having a meal alone and I remember
Speaker 1: to do it, I will do it, and you just
Speaker 1: basically hover your hands over your plate and you say
Speaker 1: a little prayer, and you can even imagine energy coming
Speaker 1: from your hands into the food and your food into
Speaker 1: your hands, and it's just a moment to really find
Speaker 1: gratitude for all that's in your life. I like to
Speaker 1: think about how fortunate I am to have a warm
Speaker 1: meal during this time, and all the people that it
Speaker 1: took to even get this meal to me, from the
Speaker 1: growers to the shippers, to the you know, the supermarket workers,
Speaker 1: to all the love that kind of went into it
Speaker 1: that really gets displaced by diet fear. And so gratitude really,
Speaker 1: as you guys know from Amy's podcast and Amy so
Speaker 1: big on gratitude, you know, can really really really change
Speaker 1: our mindset and shift us from that scarcity mindset to
Speaker 1: an abundant one. So hands over your plate, say a
Speaker 1: little prayer to whoever you pray for it or not,
Speaker 1: but either just way, just a great way to just
Speaker 1: connect to your food and slow down. And then the
Speaker 1: last tip I have for today is to not engage,
Speaker 1: perhaps today just for today in disagreements. So we had
Speaker 1: registered dietitian Sam Private on Saturday's episode of Outweigh hopefully
Speaker 1: you heard it. If not, head on back and she
Speaker 1: talked about Uncle Larry, and she reminded us that before
Speaker 1: engaging in divisive conversation, whether it's about diet culture, or
Speaker 1: politics or something else in your family, really ask yourself,
Speaker 1: is this person reachable or teachable? And if you are
Speaker 1: brand new to your journey of disordered eating and leaving diet,
Speaker 1: you may find that you're very eager to share with
Speaker 1: the world how toxic this is. Right, we're waking up
Speaker 1: to how awful this is. We want to change it.
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful thing that we want to be part
Speaker 1: of our change. But I have found that oftentimes, when
Speaker 1: we're new to the process, it could really be discouraging
Speaker 1: to enter these conversations and not walk out with somebody
Speaker 1: seeing it our way. So, again, going back to that
Speaker 1: first thing that we talked about with our intention of
Speaker 1: just for today, I want to remind you that that
Speaker 1: doesn't mean that you can't be the change in the
Speaker 1: world any other day. But this is just just for
Speaker 1: today intention. Maybe it's not the time to have these conversations, right. So,
Speaker 1: if you are in a place where Uncle Larry, for example,
Speaker 1: is reachable or teachable, and there's an opportunity to have
Speaker 1: a conversation and you feel ready to have it, by
Speaker 1: all means, go for it. But if you're not there,
Speaker 1: you're not doing anything wrong by staying silent. The best
Speaker 1: thing that we can do this holiday, or really every
Speaker 1: day is to protect our own energy and evaluate when
Speaker 1: it's appropriate to teach somebody the quote unquote better way,
Speaker 1: and when it's more appropriate it for us to stay
Speaker 1: protected and just take care of ourselves. Okay, that was
Speaker 1: a lot, and I want to make sure that you
Speaker 1: have the day to unplug and recharge. I hope you
Speaker 1: have a safe and wonderful day or weekend off. You
Speaker 1: certainly deserve it, and we'll see you back on our
Speaker 1: way this Saturday, so in just two days for our
Speaker 1: next episode. Have a great holiday, everyone,