WEBVTT - Episode 249: Bond with the Wand (Feat. JoJo) 0:00:02.200 --> 0:00:04.760 So let's get it started. It is time for lift service. 0:00:04.760 --> 0:00:08.799 I'm Angela E. I'm stepaning in Santiago. I'm Luria and 0:00:08.920 --> 0:00:14.159 Joe Joe. Care what's up Joe Joe? You first of all, 0:00:14.200 --> 0:00:15.960 you look amazing, So I don't know if you know 0:00:16.000 --> 0:00:18.360 how to do your own hair and make up into everything? 0:00:18.880 --> 0:00:21.160 Thank you. Yeah, I've had to learn over the years 0:00:21.200 --> 0:00:24.600 how to beat beat myself together real quick. Thank you. 0:00:25.160 --> 0:00:27.000 I need to learn that at some point because this 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:31.280 is said right, I'm a matigrade. I just put on 0:00:31.280 --> 0:00:33.120 an album, so I'm over here trying to, you know, 0:00:33.200 --> 0:00:36.600 have that glow up. I know that's right. Well, the 0:00:36.680 --> 0:00:42.120 album is fire. Good to know, thank you. So there's 0:00:42.120 --> 0:00:44.040 some fun things on here that we can talk about now. 0:00:44.120 --> 0:00:46.800 I saw that you said that you have stained from 0:00:46.800 --> 0:00:50.000 sex for a period of time, a period of time 0:00:50.560 --> 0:00:53.360 just to kind of focus on your female relationships. And 0:00:53.400 --> 0:00:55.680 we saw you at our Lennox and to Nashi and 0:00:55.760 --> 0:00:58.480 the video for Man. So how did it upstanding from 0:00:58.520 --> 0:01:02.320 sex change your mindset? Well, I realized that I had 0:01:02.400 --> 0:01:05.839 never really done that, um since I started like since 0:01:05.840 --> 0:01:07.920 I started dating. You know, I had been in relationship 0:01:07.959 --> 0:01:10.240 since I was fourteen, not in the same one, but 0:01:10.319 --> 0:01:12.520 like two years here, one year here, three years here, 0:01:12.560 --> 0:01:15.319 and I had always went from one to the next 0:01:15.360 --> 0:01:19.360 and never really given myself a moment to be like, uh, 0:01:19.400 --> 0:01:22.959 to not be stimulated or to not even have the 0:01:23.000 --> 0:01:27.199 comfort of companionship like that. So it wasn't just about sex. 0:01:27.240 --> 0:01:30.600 It was about companionship and self reliance and all that stuff. 0:01:30.600 --> 0:01:35.120 But um, I also found myself I'm really good at 0:01:35.160 --> 0:01:40.199 recycling like relationships, meaning so like if something, if something, 0:01:40.480 --> 0:01:43.759 if we're sexually compatible and we're both single, I'll be like, hey, 0:01:43.840 --> 0:01:45.520 what's up, you know, And I just didn't want to 0:01:45.520 --> 0:01:48.920 do that again. So, um, it was just about challenging 0:01:48.920 --> 0:01:51.040 myself and growing up a little bit. You know, I'm 0:01:51.080 --> 0:01:53.200 twenty nine, and I didn't want to bring that same 0:01:53.280 --> 0:01:56.560 energy into like the next decade when I step into it. 0:01:56.720 --> 0:01:59.600 So I feel like I'm guilty of a similar thing. 0:01:59.720 --> 0:02:02.200 But like, do you feel like it's because of the 0:02:02.240 --> 0:02:05.440 different situations you learned even with your relationships and business 0:02:05.840 --> 0:02:07.840 and how like maybe you kind of put your trust 0:02:07.840 --> 0:02:11.240 in those you know, situations and then next thing you know, 0:02:11.280 --> 0:02:15.000 they kind of let you down and disappointages. Absolutely, Yeah, 0:02:15.040 --> 0:02:17.720 I think when you find somebody that you can trust 0:02:17.760 --> 0:02:20.960 in your compatible way. That's hard to like, it's hard 0:02:21.000 --> 0:02:22.919 to open yourself up to new people. So I think 0:02:22.919 --> 0:02:27.200 that that's why I have been a backslider and you know, 0:02:27.240 --> 0:02:29.760 you know what I mean, because I don't open myself 0:02:29.840 --> 0:02:32.960 up to to new people very very uh, very easily, 0:02:33.120 --> 0:02:36.080 and it takes time and it's like an investment almost. 0:02:36.120 --> 0:02:39.760 So yeah, I is that what you were talking about? Yeah, exactly, 0:02:39.960 --> 0:02:48.240 not sous Are you attached to that? Really is the vibe, 0:02:48.280 --> 0:02:50.680 isn't it? Yeah? I don't. It's it's hard for me. 0:02:50.800 --> 0:02:53.640 Like I'm nice to everybody, I'm cool for everybody, and 0:02:53.639 --> 0:02:56.560 and um, when guys meet me, they're like, oh man, 0:02:56.720 --> 0:02:59.720 that's that's a great personality. But and really like it's 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:01.640 hard to get close to me because I'm so quick 0:03:01.720 --> 0:03:05.840 to cut people off, like the first especially when she's 0:03:05.840 --> 0:03:13.240 not her period. I should tell you, step Well, let 0:03:13.240 --> 0:03:14.560 me ask you this. Did you have a lot of 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:17.080 female friends or was this something that you also felt 0:03:17.080 --> 0:03:18.880 like at the same time, you have to focus on 0:03:18.960 --> 0:03:23.799 being closer with women. No, Honestly, I've been really fortunate 0:03:23.880 --> 0:03:27.160 to have amazing female friendships. Um, I've lived in l 0:03:27.200 --> 0:03:29.000 a for ten years and and a lot of people 0:03:29.000 --> 0:03:32.440 are like l A is so fake. But I gotta say, 0:03:32.480 --> 0:03:34.920 it's like we kind of attract the energy that you 0:03:35.040 --> 0:03:37.800 put out. So if you're having a fake experience, maybe 0:03:37.800 --> 0:03:40.200 look look into that. I don't know, you know what 0:03:40.200 --> 0:03:44.640 I mean. I mean, so I have amazing friendships. Actually, 0:03:44.640 --> 0:03:46.600 my my two best friends that I grew up with 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:49.800 in matt Massachusetts moved out to l A. And one 0:03:49.840 --> 0:03:53.080 lives up the street. She just had a baby, and um, 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:55.560 we yeah, like she's been doing my hair and makeup 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.480 since we were fifteen. And then my other girl, meany 0:03:58.560 --> 0:04:00.360 who we met on the playground when we were eight 0:04:00.400 --> 0:04:03.360 years old. Um, you know she's she's a flight attendant. 0:04:03.400 --> 0:04:06.120 She's in New York right now. But I've had long standing, 0:04:07.120 --> 0:04:10.080 great female friendships and also new ones like to Nach 0:04:10.240 --> 0:04:12.880 and R. Lennox, like girls who are just carving their 0:04:12.880 --> 0:04:15.600 own path, doing their own thing. And but to be honest, 0:04:15.640 --> 0:04:17.760 most of my friends outside of music, whether they're in 0:04:17.839 --> 0:04:23.000 fashion or um you know, their lawyers or their makeup art, 0:04:23.040 --> 0:04:26.640 you know whatever. So how about Tearless with I read that, Um, 0:04:26.640 --> 0:04:29.080 when you were going through your battle, she kind of like, 0:04:29.480 --> 0:04:31.479 you know, said, oh, I feel for you. And then 0:04:31.480 --> 0:04:33.600 you know, now she's turning around and she's going through 0:04:33.880 --> 0:04:36.400 a similar situation. Are you still in touch with her 0:04:36.680 --> 0:04:39.599 or how does that? Well? I'm not I'm not still 0:04:39.640 --> 0:04:41.680 in touch with her. We we had a cool we 0:04:41.720 --> 0:04:44.400 had a cool moment where like, you know, she was 0:04:45.160 --> 0:04:48.760 she's a really talented young woman obviously, and I like, 0:04:48.800 --> 0:04:51.880 I really respect what she's done. But um, yeah, And 0:04:51.920 --> 0:04:54.520 she told me that she was sympathizing with what I 0:04:54.560 --> 0:04:56.520 was going through when I was going through it, and 0:04:57.600 --> 0:04:59.680 I don't know say other than she said she was 0:04:59.680 --> 0:05:02.560 sympath as with it. Right now, let me ask you this, 0:05:02.640 --> 0:05:05.800 during this time, right when you were abstinent, were you 0:05:05.880 --> 0:05:11.239 masturbating a lot? Yes, girl, absolutely, And I also wasn't. 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:14.880 I wasn't perfectly abstinent, Like let me be okay, let 0:05:15.080 --> 0:05:19.680 let me be, let me be clear. Yeah I was 0:05:19.720 --> 0:05:23.040 like once in a while. Yeah, No, honestly thought, like 0:05:23.520 --> 0:05:26.039 to be explicit, I didn't want to be penetrated. I 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:31.120 did not want to receive any any because have you 0:05:31.160 --> 0:05:33.320 heard this saying you bond with the wand I didn't 0:05:33.320 --> 0:05:37.000 want to be bonded with no one. But that's I'm 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:41.599 gonna use that. Yeah. The older woman said that to me, 0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:43.440 and I'm like, oh no, no, no, I can't take 0:05:43.520 --> 0:05:45.880 in anything other than I want all my creativity on 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:48.159 my sexuality. But that doesn't mean I didn't have a 0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:49.800 hot make out. You know what I'm saying every once 0:05:49.839 --> 0:05:59.320 in a while, a little oral, little oral girl. Oh yeah, 0:05:59.680 --> 0:06:02.279 let me tell you. I went. I went with about 0:06:02.360 --> 0:06:05.760 sex like two months, and it made me um not 0:06:05.880 --> 0:06:07.840 want to master me. I didn't want a master. I 0:06:07.880 --> 0:06:10.600 don't even want to come. But I only went two months, 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:12.919 and I'm not gonna lie, I thought while I was like, 0:06:12.960 --> 0:06:16.720 all right, all right, all right, no, who am I 0:06:16.760 --> 0:06:23.279 gonna call? All right, I gotta go dee mm hmm 0:06:24.360 --> 0:06:29.240 some kind of guys. Am I into guys who are mad? Funny? 0:06:29.560 --> 0:06:37.119 Who are caring? Who are uh good? You didn't mention 0:06:37.240 --> 0:06:41.159 dick at all? Like okay, okay, okay, I'm damn okay, 0:06:41.279 --> 0:06:45.240 I'm I'm amongst my girls here, I guess okay. Sex 0:06:45.360 --> 0:06:47.039 is very important to me at this point in my life. 0:06:47.080 --> 0:06:49.520 I don't have bad sex. I'm not staying with you. 0:06:49.560 --> 0:06:53.480 I'm not staying with you if we're not sexually compatible. 0:06:53.520 --> 0:06:57.320 I'm trying to be like about it, but it's okay. 0:06:57.560 --> 0:07:00.680 Be you. You know what I'm saying. Listen, So does 0:07:00.720 --> 0:07:07.240 size matter? Yeah? Your first yes, it does. Your first 0:07:07.240 --> 0:07:08.800 inst thing was yeah, and then you try to clean 0:07:08.800 --> 0:07:12.480 it up. I mean yeah, but do you get like 0:07:12.560 --> 0:07:17.480 sometimes business like saying, say, like the first time, you're like, uh, 0:07:17.480 --> 0:07:20.320 he's kind of a good size, but it wasn't that good. 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:24.840 Would you second chanced? Okay? The truth things, I've never 0:07:24.880 --> 0:07:27.640 had a one night stand because I've given that person 0:07:27.680 --> 0:07:29.760 the second chance. It would have been a one night 0:07:29.800 --> 0:07:33.000 stand because it was whack. It wasn't good for me. 0:07:33.120 --> 0:07:34.760 I don't know how he thought. He probably feat it 0:07:34.760 --> 0:07:37.480 wasn't good either. But like a couple of years later, 0:07:38.360 --> 0:07:41.120 I was like, you know, he had been trying. I 0:07:41.160 --> 0:07:43.320 was like, oh it, let's just let's see if it's no. 0:07:43.440 --> 0:07:49.560 And it was still whack. You're sweetheart for that. Yeah, 0:07:49.760 --> 0:07:52.440 you know, I have lost your heart I had. I 0:07:52.520 --> 0:07:54.920 was optimistic. I was like, maybe he had an off night, 0:07:54.920 --> 0:07:57.120 maybe he was too high. I don't know. You know, 0:07:57.160 --> 0:07:59.520 it's interesting. I was reading this article in Men's House 0:07:59.520 --> 0:08:02.480 and it was that when guys are in a great 0:08:02.520 --> 0:08:05.320 relationship having great sex, they're more likely to cheat when 0:08:05.360 --> 0:08:12.840 the sex is great. Wow. And I don't know why, 0:08:12.920 --> 0:08:14.960 but it was this article about it, and they were 0:08:15.000 --> 0:08:19.080 saying that when you are more comfortable and having sex 0:08:19.080 --> 0:08:20.720 and having great sex, and then when you're having a 0:08:20.800 --> 0:08:23.280 dry spell, guys are less likely to cheat. I don't 0:08:23.280 --> 0:08:27.040 know that thing. And do you think it's true for 0:08:27.240 --> 0:08:31.880 women as well? Because to be transparent, I have cheated 0:08:31.920 --> 0:08:35.440 in a relationship where I was having great sex. It 0:08:35.520 --> 0:08:37.800 wasn't about the relationship being bad. It wasn't about the 0:08:37.800 --> 0:08:39.840 sex being bad. It was I felt hitty about myself, 0:08:39.880 --> 0:08:42.920 but I was having great sex. So maybe it's not 0:08:42.960 --> 0:08:45.360 just exclusive to men. Maybe we're all just trashed. And 0:08:45.400 --> 0:08:47.679 that's what the article was saying too. It's not about 0:08:47.760 --> 0:08:50.680 your relationship not being good. It's more about a lack 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:54.000 of something in yourself exactly. It's never about the It's 0:08:54.040 --> 0:08:58.120 like it's how you feel about yourself always now. And 0:08:58.280 --> 0:09:00.400 I was gonna say that guy you cheated on, right, 0:09:00.880 --> 0:09:03.080 was this the guy from the song reckless from back 0:09:03.080 --> 0:09:05.199 then or was it somebody else? Like? No, that was 0:09:05.240 --> 0:09:13.880 a different guy, you know, the guy that I wrote 0:09:13.880 --> 0:09:16.680 that song Reckless about on my last album. Um that 0:09:16.800 --> 0:09:19.199 was like almost like a high school sweetheart type thing, 0:09:19.320 --> 0:09:22.400 and that was like, you know, he lost his virginity 0:09:22.400 --> 0:09:24.320 to me. I had only been with one another boyfriend 0:09:24.679 --> 0:09:27.480 for him. It's not like I was the seasons, you know, 0:09:28.400 --> 0:09:30.720 and then you broke no, But yeah, it just maybe 0:09:30.720 --> 0:09:33.719 you weren't. He was a really sweet, like southern, very 0:09:34.600 --> 0:09:37.280 Christian guy, and we're just we weren't going to be 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:39.840 compatible long term. But but this person that I was 0:09:39.880 --> 0:09:44.040 talking about, um with this nah, it's it's a different person. 0:09:44.120 --> 0:09:46.800 And I really, I really fucked it up and I'll 0:09:46.840 --> 0:09:49.400 never be the same After that, I was like, I 0:09:49.440 --> 0:09:51.200 can't cope in the same way as I can't just 0:09:51.240 --> 0:09:57.440 get this external validation and distract myself with uh, you know, 0:09:57.600 --> 0:09:59.920 with the tension uh like I have in the past. 0:10:00.120 --> 0:10:01.600 That's just I don't want to I don't want to 0:10:01.600 --> 0:10:03.800 do that anymore. Did he break up with you or 0:10:03.880 --> 0:10:05.400 did he still want to be with you? After that? 0:10:06.600 --> 0:10:11.440 I told him what I did a few months later, 0:10:12.280 --> 0:10:16.959 and we we tried to make it work and it didn't. 0:10:17.080 --> 0:10:19.440 You know, it couldn't. Why did you tell him because 0:10:19.440 --> 0:10:23.200 you didn't get caught? Obviously. I told him because I 0:10:23.400 --> 0:10:27.960 thought that we could very easily end up getting married 0:10:28.000 --> 0:10:30.760 and having like really having a life together. And I 0:10:30.800 --> 0:10:34.040 couldn't live with that. I couldn't. I could not live 0:10:34.080 --> 0:10:36.200 with that. I just kept looking over at him and 0:10:36.240 --> 0:10:39.120 being like, I love you, You're such a good man. 0:10:39.280 --> 0:10:42.920 I can't. I'm gonna tell you someday, and I can't 0:10:42.920 --> 0:10:45.120 have it be too late, man. You know. They say 0:10:45.120 --> 0:10:47.360 it's selfish and to tell us about I know, and 0:10:47.400 --> 0:10:50.040 I agree. I agree. Even my therapist was like, are 0:10:50.040 --> 0:10:51.960 you gonna do it again? I was like no. She's 0:10:52.000 --> 0:10:56.959 like like, yeah, it's something I couldn't. I I couldn't. 0:10:57.080 --> 0:10:59.200 That's how I am. But Angela always called me a 0:10:59.200 --> 0:11:02.600 bad person to myself. She's what do you mean? She says, 0:11:02.600 --> 0:11:05.560 I'm being bad to myself because I'll tell I'll be like, listen, 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:08.719 I can't hold it in anymore. I felt terrible. I 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:12.680 cheated or I did whatever, I went to lunch or whatever. 0:11:12.720 --> 0:11:15.040 I'll say whatever I didn't. She's I went to lunch. 0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:18.920 I mean, yeah, but I've got in the trouble for that, Angela. 0:11:18.960 --> 0:11:23.240 I agree that some information is distracting and not necessary, 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:28.040 but but you you can use your discernment and and 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:30.280 know what you you know. I guess you went to 0:11:30.600 --> 0:11:33.400 lunch with somebody, and you know if you thought about 0:11:33.440 --> 0:11:35.560 it and it was no big deal, like and you 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:38.160 know he's gonna be mad for no reason, and you 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:43.400 know you didn't do anything, and I lied. I just 0:11:43.440 --> 0:11:46.960 sawed her ball, I know exactly. So just when you 0:11:47.000 --> 0:11:49.800 were coming out, did you have like older guys I 0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:52.600 was here and you especially like in the industry, because 0:11:52.679 --> 0:11:57.440 it was yes, yeah, right, honestly, yes, is because you 0:11:57.480 --> 0:12:01.040 still see these some of these guys I'm here. Yeah, 0:12:01.080 --> 0:12:03.320 honestly now that I'm a grown woman, now, I'm like, 0:12:03.440 --> 0:12:07.440 that is fucking nasty. You are gross and you I 0:12:07.520 --> 0:12:10.320 wonder what you were doing with other I wonder if 0:12:10.360 --> 0:12:12.720 like there were other underage girls that you know you 0:12:12.720 --> 0:12:17.840 were I mean, yeah, thankfully. I never I was never 0:12:17.840 --> 0:12:20.679 taking advantage of nobody ever, like did anything wild. But 0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:23.200 my poor mother, like she was really trying to make 0:12:23.240 --> 0:12:26.679 sure that that I wasn't taken advantage of. But I 0:12:26.720 --> 0:12:28.760 would like want to like talk to these older boys 0:12:28.760 --> 0:12:32.199 and stuff, and she was like my fast through in 0:12:32.200 --> 0:12:34.040 the Hudson River. We were living in New Jersey at 0:12:34.040 --> 0:12:36.160 the time. She was like, nope, not on my watch, 0:12:36.720 --> 0:12:42.719 good mom. Yeah, yeah, Now I gotta ask you this 0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:46.840 song comeback right? Is that about what makes you come 0:12:46.880 --> 0:12:52.360 so fast all the time? Yeah? And what and what 0:12:52.600 --> 0:12:59.640 is fast? Oh? What is fast? Um? See it? I 0:12:59.760 --> 0:13:04.559 don't know exactly take me, but okay, So this was 0:13:04.600 --> 0:13:09.160 actually about me fantasizing about how how intense it would 0:13:09.160 --> 0:13:11.000 be to get back with that person that I was 0:13:11.040 --> 0:13:15.680 telling you about. Love him? I do, Yeah, he says, 0:13:17.760 --> 0:13:23.360 I can't with y'all. You do because you said you 0:13:23.480 --> 0:13:26.560 backbedal a lot, So I know you do. Oh I 0:13:26.600 --> 0:13:31.280 hate you. No, I'm just trying to figure it out. 0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:41.520 Figure it out. He's like, girl, what is the Sagittarius energy? 0:13:41.600 --> 0:13:44.760 I don't know. Man, they know I'm listening to you. 0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:47.280 I'm like, they hear the story from me all the time. 0:13:48.360 --> 0:13:50.679 It is hard to break up with somebody who makes 0:13:50.720 --> 0:13:52.880 you come really fast, though, because that's not an easy 0:13:52.920 --> 0:13:55.560 thing to find. When you bond with the wand and 0:13:55.600 --> 0:13:57.760 when you have that, you know, and when it's more 0:13:57.800 --> 0:14:01.079 than sex, it's it's it's it's crazy. But especially when 0:14:01.120 --> 0:14:04.000 you have that pent up energy and you've been you know, 0:14:04.080 --> 0:14:06.640 haven't seen somebody in a long time, there is nothing 0:14:06.760 --> 0:14:09.199 like that. I love that dramatic comeback to be honest 0:14:09.200 --> 0:14:11.720 with you, Like I love when you've been thinking about 0:14:11.760 --> 0:14:13.840 having sex with the person for a long time and 0:14:13.880 --> 0:14:17.080 then you're like, oh ship, mom me unleash the cracking 0:14:17.160 --> 0:14:21.280 on your ass. You guys just happened to me like 0:14:21.560 --> 0:14:25.400 two weeks ago, bro, and I bet it was as 0:14:25.400 --> 0:14:29.600 good as fun. It was fabulous. But I feel like 0:14:29.600 --> 0:14:33.920 you're a squirter. I am not, but I do like 0:14:34.240 --> 0:14:36.440 I do. I'm into it. I like watching it, I 0:14:36.520 --> 0:14:38.760 like seeing it. I like the idea of it. But naha, 0:14:41.360 --> 0:14:43.240 all of this made me feel like, you know, you 0:14:44.320 --> 0:14:47.360 do a big explosion, So I was just curious as well. 0:14:47.720 --> 0:14:50.520 But you know, I don't believe it. You know, I 0:14:50.640 --> 0:14:53.480 really really love when you talk nasty on your songs. 0:14:53.520 --> 0:14:57.240 Those are my favorite songs from you, and especially on 0:14:57.320 --> 0:15:00.640 this new project, is when you're getting freaky. I like 0:15:00.840 --> 0:15:05.520 that from you. I like that side Okay, is that 0:15:05.640 --> 0:15:08.760 what it is? I thought? I'm sorry, we all wanted 0:15:08.800 --> 0:15:12.600 the same, but Jojo, you've been so you've been a 0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:14.720 side piece before, and I judged that from this one 0:15:14.720 --> 0:15:19.440 of your songs. UM so bad, right, yo? So actually 0:15:20.000 --> 0:15:23.400 so bad? Is that me and this guy we're both 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:25.800 lying to each other and knowing that we were lying 0:15:25.800 --> 0:15:29.040 to each other. We were both in a relationship, and 0:15:30.040 --> 0:15:32.880 so if you want to call me, I would never 0:15:32.920 --> 0:15:35.320 actually call myself a side piece. I've never knowingly been 0:15:35.360 --> 0:15:38.080 a side piece. But I but he was lying to you, 0:15:38.120 --> 0:15:40.720 but you knew it and you were lying to him. Yeah. 0:15:40.960 --> 0:15:43.000 I think we both were like, no, we're we're on 0:15:43.040 --> 0:15:46.960 breaks from our people, but we we premeditatively wanted to 0:15:47.000 --> 0:15:51.400 get involved in some fucking serious Have you ever confronted 0:15:51.440 --> 0:15:54.120 a woman like okay, um, you're mess up with my 0:15:54.160 --> 0:15:59.480 man or you're calling my man. Um. I'm trying to 0:15:59.520 --> 0:16:03.680 remember because I I'm really good at compartmentalizing and like 0:16:03.880 --> 0:16:07.000 not like anything I did before the age of twenty three, 0:16:07.000 --> 0:16:08.720 any relationships I was in, it was like they didn't 0:16:08.760 --> 0:16:13.840 even happen. I remember, Yeah, so I shouldn't have even 0:16:13.880 --> 0:16:16.000 been been able to be let out the house. Um. 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:20.280 But um, let me think I think I know actually, 0:16:20.280 --> 0:16:22.840 and let me tell you why. Because my I was 0:16:23.200 --> 0:16:26.640 dating this guy and he cheated and I cut like 0:16:26.680 --> 0:16:28.280 the rug was pulled out from under me, and I 0:16:28.320 --> 0:16:30.280 was just like, I never thought that you would do 0:16:30.320 --> 0:16:33.920 this to me. And I remember I had met this bitch, right, 0:16:34.040 --> 0:16:36.240 I had met this girl that he cheated on me with, 0:16:36.640 --> 0:16:38.680 and I remember her being like, I love you like 0:16:38.680 --> 0:16:41.360 a group your music, like like I had a poster 0:16:41.480 --> 0:16:43.920 in my locker, blah blah blah. I'm like I was like, 0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:46.720 I'm going to confront this bitch. No, she's not going 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:50.640 to get a call from me, nothing like that, because yeah, 0:16:50.640 --> 0:16:52.760 so I was just like, no, she's a fan nub. 0:16:52.800 --> 0:16:56.000 I don't think so she's not gonna she'll be like, 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.920 get you call me. That's a great story. So I 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:02.360 didn't tell when I catch when I catch my man 0:17:02.440 --> 0:17:04.520 with another girl, I'm not gonna give her the satisfaction 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:07.120 of knowing she got me that I'm gonna write them, 0:17:07.640 --> 0:17:11.840 but I'm not. I'm and it's never about the woman either. 0:17:11.960 --> 0:17:14.440 It's like that the issues between me and my man, 0:17:14.520 --> 0:17:17.080 I'm really not upset. I mean, she's gonna do what 0:17:17.080 --> 0:17:21.000 she's gonna do, but he's his commitments to me right now. 0:17:21.040 --> 0:17:24.879 That's definitely it is happening to you because you guys 0:17:24.920 --> 0:17:27.960 know my situation I've been with. I thought for a 0:17:28.040 --> 0:17:32.439 long time, what am I gonna do? And I'm not 0:17:32.480 --> 0:17:34.359 gonna lie. I've caught this guy who I've been in 0:17:34.400 --> 0:17:36.760 love with for a few years now, and I've called 0:17:36.840 --> 0:17:39.360 one a lot of different women over the years, and 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:43.320 I've never confronted one of them. I'm not not even white. 0:17:44.200 --> 0:17:46.560 He heard it. I'm broken up with him a lot 0:17:46.600 --> 0:17:50.119 of times. We'll be on and off or whatever, you know, 0:17:50.200 --> 0:17:53.320 but I end up forgiving for him anyway. And but regardless, 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:55.760 the only anyway back to the subject, the reason why, 0:17:55.840 --> 0:17:58.160 it's because I'm not gonna give another woman the satisfaction 0:17:58.320 --> 0:18:01.000 of feeling like she got under my skin, like right, 0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:03.399 But when makes you take them back? Though? Like, how 0:18:03.440 --> 0:18:09.000 do you get over that? Cheating? Said? Is that after 0:18:09.080 --> 0:18:12.280 you get over it? Though? What do you get over it? 0:18:12.320 --> 0:18:14.840 Are you able to? Like I never get over it? Yeah, 0:18:15.280 --> 0:18:18.000 you just stay in fight the whole time. I don't know. No, 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:19.960 I don't mention it either. I don't know. I don't 0:18:19.960 --> 0:18:22.960 bring up no women to him at all. Ever, it's 0:18:23.000 --> 0:18:26.600 just like, okay, I'm back at the moment, I'll argue 0:18:26.640 --> 0:18:29.160 about it, I'll break up with him, blah blah blah, 0:18:29.440 --> 0:18:34.040 and between time in the meantime, I'm suffering. I miss him, 0:18:34.040 --> 0:18:44.840 messing with nobody else, Like I'm thinking, what you mean that? Finally? 0:18:44.920 --> 0:18:47.800 Either he gives in or I give in, And look, 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:51.520 I mean, stuff already already knows this. Every everybody's growing obviously, 0:18:51.560 --> 0:18:53.600 and it's gonna work until it doesn't work for you 0:18:53.640 --> 0:18:55.880 anymore and then and then that's it. But it's gonna 0:18:57.400 --> 0:19:00.320 do what feel good until it feels not good anymore. 0:19:00.400 --> 0:19:02.480 You know what I'm saying, Like, that's really all all. 0:19:02.840 --> 0:19:05.800 That's the advice I would give my girlfriends, Like, yes, 0:19:05.840 --> 0:19:08.560 you deserve more, of course, but if something, if you're 0:19:08.560 --> 0:19:11.200 getting something from this, then get what you get from 0:19:11.200 --> 0:19:14.760 it and then look for something else. You know, sometimes 0:19:14.800 --> 0:19:16.720 you think about it at the worst time to like 0:19:16.720 --> 0:19:22.879 you'll be sucking his dick like dick, Angela. You know 0:19:23.000 --> 0:19:26.040 it's awful. That's because like you'll be having sex and 0:19:26.080 --> 0:19:28.320 you'll be thinking, oh my, don't have something if I 0:19:28.400 --> 0:19:31.399 think a bottle. Hell no, Angela, you need to be 0:19:31.440 --> 0:19:33.080 more in the moment than that. I want to be 0:19:33.160 --> 0:19:36.840 so focused cut down that moment my head. You'll be 0:19:36.960 --> 0:19:39.280 so mad and you'd be like I get with you. 0:19:39.440 --> 0:19:42.120 I get where you're coming from, Angela, because it's like 0:19:42.720 --> 0:19:47.359 little things could trigger memories and you're like, oh wait, 0:19:47.480 --> 0:19:50.320 someone else was just doing this. Yeah, your dick off, 0:19:52.480 --> 0:19:56.360 no idea you'd be liked. I taste listen you on here, 0:19:56.400 --> 0:20:01.080 that's not come on you all and you're just might 0:20:01.359 --> 0:20:04.320 and you're now you know you take it too. Five. 0:20:04.320 --> 0:20:07.120 Have you ever smelled somebody's underwear or smell their dick 0:20:07.119 --> 0:20:09.399 when they come home and been like, what have you 0:20:09.400 --> 0:20:15.080 been up to? You're crazy? You know is crazy. But 0:20:15.160 --> 0:20:18.520 I have smelled like, um my nigga, like ya, you 0:20:18.560 --> 0:20:20.800 smell a little bit different, you know what I mean? 0:20:20.920 --> 0:20:24.520 Like did you take a shower like you can? You 0:20:24.560 --> 0:20:26.760 can smell when someone takes a shower and ain't soak 0:20:26.840 --> 0:20:31.480 y'all use at home. It's a different so hotel. So damn, 0:20:33.080 --> 0:20:37.560 it's scandalous out here. Yeah. You know. One time, one 0:20:37.560 --> 0:20:39.879 time I caught my man with a girl in his 0:20:39.960 --> 0:20:42.360 house and she had on a pair of his sweatpants. Right, 0:20:42.800 --> 0:20:45.040 that's so upset it, that's so upsetting the same being 0:20:45.160 --> 0:20:47.880 you like the word too. I was like, oh really okay, 0:20:48.080 --> 0:20:50.479 So I screenshot it and I'm like, oh, so this 0:20:50.520 --> 0:20:54.200 is what we're doing. Okay. So I ended up going 0:20:54.240 --> 0:20:57.800 to his house for five days, made when my period 0:20:57.920 --> 0:20:59.640 was not because that's the only time I ever catch 0:20:59.680 --> 0:21:02.640 some one of they you can't even wait a couple 0:21:02.640 --> 0:21:04.720 of days. I swear to God I can't. But anyway, 0:21:04.760 --> 0:21:07.080 you can't do it. I mean lately, I have to 0:21:07.119 --> 0:21:11.480 admit right now, like I'm in a good place when 0:21:11.480 --> 0:21:14.119 it comes to my love life. I feel like, you know, 0:21:14.200 --> 0:21:17.280 I'm seeing effort and I'm really proud of this person. 0:21:17.480 --> 0:21:20.360 But anyway, let's go back to the story. So when 0:21:20.400 --> 0:21:25.320 I got to his house, sweatpants and I found sweatpants 0:21:25.720 --> 0:21:28.760 and I smelled them, and they smell like a dirty 0:21:28.880 --> 0:21:33.000 ass no stuff. I swear this is a true story. Okay, 0:21:33.000 --> 0:21:36.639 See that would bring me some petty joy, be like, 0:21:36.960 --> 0:21:39.040 I mean joy because I took out. I was like, 0:21:39.080 --> 0:21:40.600 you really fucking but just who don't know how to 0:21:40.640 --> 0:21:44.760 clean and pussy really smell? It's like that smelling And 0:21:44.800 --> 0:21:47.479 he's like, what are you talking about? He's like, what 0:21:47.520 --> 0:21:50.040 are you talking about? He's like, that just wasn't she 0:21:50.119 --> 0:21:51.879 wasn't where I'm like, so this is how you smell. 0:21:52.240 --> 0:21:57.240 And I'm sorry, yeah, that's discussing, Stephanie. I'm not swelling. 0:21:57.600 --> 0:22:03.119 I'm not smelling nobody. Not only did he cheat on you, 0:22:03.160 --> 0:22:08.840 but you also smelled division ass, Like Alrett, you could 0:22:08.840 --> 0:22:11.120 smell my sluts. I promise you girls, you could smell 0:22:11.160 --> 0:22:14.560 my sweats and they smell good. Kapanie, we are not 0:22:14.640 --> 0:22:18.240 smelling your ass. You're good and it's not like nothing. 0:22:18.320 --> 0:22:21.320