Speaker 1: The nick. Yes, he's Nikki A. How's it going out there?
Speaker 1: Happy Thursday? It's a nickulating the podcast. I don't think
Speaker 1: I've talked yet today, So that was let me just
Speaker 1: clear my throat a little bit. I'm a little horse today.
Speaker 1: That always makes your horse uh what that is? Always?
Speaker 1: That is never not funny to say I'm a little horse.
Speaker 1: Oh that's so cute. I wish I were a little horse. Um,
Speaker 1: I'm a pony today. That's a new way of saying
Speaker 1: that you have a sore throat or like your voice
Speaker 1: sounds husky. Is to say I'm I'm I'm pony, I'm
Speaker 1: a pony because it's a little horse. I mean I
Speaker 1: technically it's probably not. Is a pony a horse? Do
Speaker 1: you know you're a horse girl? I think yeah, it's
Speaker 1: like in the equine family. Yeah, but I'm wondering if
Speaker 1: a like a well okay, yeah, I mean like we
Speaker 1: could look it up, but like, honestly, I don't even like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's fine. Um, is a sea horse or horse? No
Speaker 1: one knows? Is an eggplant an egg? Last night that
Speaker 1: was one of the things that Andrew uh wrapped about.
Speaker 1: I want to say on um, we went on we
Speaker 1: went live last night on our Instagram Nicky glazer pot Instagram.
Speaker 1: I want to shout out to everyone who saw that
Speaker 1: should show. Um I did not know, so I was
Speaker 1: like busy trying to book tickets back from Canada and
Speaker 1: figure out how to get back to St. Louis. And
Speaker 1: it's it's gonna take me like fourteen fifteen hours to
Speaker 1: get back to St. Louis. Um from Edmonton worth it.
Speaker 1: I'm going there. I'm doing twenty minutes of comedy. I'm
Speaker 1: I'm flying. So that's tomorrow night on Friday. I'm flying
Speaker 1: in Thursday day to do twenty minutes of comedy on
Speaker 1: Friday night and then get back on a plane Saturday
Speaker 1: and fly back. It's wild, Like you know sometimes I
Speaker 1: do most of the time, I do like an hour
Speaker 1: and twenty um, and even that seems ridiculous to do
Speaker 1: to work that much or little, but um anyway, I'm I'm,
Speaker 1: I'm like last night. Yesterday was the longest day of
Speaker 1: my life. I never stopped and I didn't even have
Speaker 1: a phone with me the whole day, So I don't
Speaker 1: even know how what my day would I probably would
Speaker 1: have had some sort of mental breakdown. And had my
Speaker 1: phone been working in text have been coming through consistently,
Speaker 1: and um, it's really nice to be off the grid
Speaker 1: for a day. But um, actually it's stressful. That's a
Speaker 1: whole other thing. But um, so I finally got through
Speaker 1: and on one one still on hold. No, Um, I
Speaker 1: was on my computer. This is like ten o'clock at night.
Speaker 1: We tried to watch Mr Corman, Me and Andrew. It
Speaker 1: was finally my day was over. I got a new
Speaker 1: phone the last minute, right before the AT and T
Speaker 1: store closed. Get home and I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: my day is finally over. I feel good. I got
Speaker 1: a lot of emails when I got home. I got
Speaker 1: a really exciting call that I can't wait to talk about.
Speaker 1: Um from They said, we thank you for calling. You're
Speaker 1: still an old note. Uh. I'm sitting there. I'm eating.
Speaker 1: We got some Thai food. I got a double papia salad.
Speaker 1: I'm really enjoying it. Um. We put on Mr Corman,
Speaker 1: which was suggested to us by several besties. You gotta
Speaker 1: watch Mr Corman. No you don't. I mean, if you
Speaker 1: have any anxiety this show. This show is like almost
Speaker 1: like Requiem for a Dream or what I imagine Recuam
Speaker 1: for a Dream is like in terms of I know
Speaker 1: you've seen it, No, I've never seen. It's always the
Speaker 1: movie on Reddit that everyone talks about, like what's the
Speaker 1: movie that you wish you wouldn't have seen, but you're
Speaker 1: glad you did. Kind of thing like hard to Watch,
Speaker 1: which which, by the way, I was watching thirty Rock
Speaker 1: the other day and Tracy Morgan gets a job offer
Speaker 1: for a movie he's trying to egot, which is getting
Speaker 1: Emmy Grammy Oscar Tony and he's going for the oh
Speaker 1: and his he got and he's trying to get an
Speaker 1: Oscar buzzy type movie where he plays like a disabled
Speaker 1: person or like a you know, like a war movie,
Speaker 1: and they're like, Tracy, you've got to do this movie.
Speaker 1: It's called hard to Watch. It just describes so much
Speaker 1: of the uh stuff out there, which Fboy Island you
Speaker 1: would think is ht uh W, but it's not. It's
Speaker 1: that for me is et dubs, but HT dubs. There's
Speaker 1: so many shows that I don't understand why people watch
Speaker 1: them when we are living in a world of extreme anxiety.
Speaker 1: I mean, and this is what the show is about.
Speaker 1: Mr Corman is Joseph Gordon Levitt J g L's UM
Speaker 1: new show that he directed, wrote, produced UM. Maybe one
Speaker 1: of those things he should have given to someone else,
Speaker 1: because I was overwhelmed by this uh production. Everyone's telling
Speaker 1: me to watch it. I got a bestie emphatically telling
Speaker 1: me that I would love it. And this was probably
Speaker 1: a d M I got from a Bessie who we
Speaker 1: had had some history. Like sometimes I look and I'm
Speaker 1: go oh, me and this Bessie have communicated a lot.
Speaker 1: I don't remember everyone, Like if you come out to
Speaker 1: me and say I'm Spangled Bush thirty two, I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna remember our exact I can't do that. There's maybe
Speaker 1: a couple of names that I would remember that I
Speaker 1: just talked to consistently. That are our friends and friends
Speaker 1: fans UM. But generally, like I have to remind myself, oh,
Speaker 1: do I have a history with this person? So this
Speaker 1: person was someone I like trusted their opinion. You gotta
Speaker 1: watch Mr Corman. I was like, got it, noted it?
Speaker 1: When it comes up, I will remember to watch that.
Speaker 1: Andrew last night was like, you want to watch Mr
Speaker 1: Corman because we tried to watch UM The Greatest Showman,
Speaker 1: and I was like, he puts it on. He goes,
Speaker 1: you wanna watch the gariest showman. I was like, m hm,
Speaker 1: He's like it's really good. No, he didn't say that.
Speaker 1: He goes, let's watch it. I was like, all right, fine,
Speaker 1: I'm just like eating my provisyle looking at Air Canada flights.
Speaker 1: It starts, which I do love that song. That's like,
Speaker 1: this is the greatest show because I danced to it. Uh.
Speaker 1: At the finale of Dancing with the Stars, Bobby boonenes
Speaker 1: like finale dance. He invited me back to like dancing it,
Speaker 1: and it was so much fun because I got to
Speaker 1: dance with like no pressure of being eliminated. So it's
Speaker 1: just like fun. And if you watch his finale dance
Speaker 1: on YouTube, try to find me I I dare Where's
Speaker 1: Waldo is easier to play? Then find Nikki Glazer in
Speaker 1: a on a show she was a cast member on
Speaker 1: Dancing with the Source forgot about me, by the way,
Speaker 1: completely forgot about me. Um as soon as he voted
Speaker 1: me off. You guys know my history with it still
Speaker 1: tied up, like still have a lot of resentments. Was
Speaker 1: on that show, loved it, obsessed with it, got voted off.
Speaker 1: Oh everyone so sad Nikki's leaving tears tears tears, first
Speaker 1: voted off, I didn't even like as I know him
Speaker 1: on a lot on Tangents. I'll get back to everything,
Speaker 1: I promise you. So my A D D meds are
Speaker 1: kicking in. Garrett Power. Garrett P. From f Wight Island
Speaker 1: is was one of the first voted off on the show,
Speaker 1: among a couple others, and he read a poem to
Speaker 1: Nikia on the first episode. Uh, and it was like this,
Speaker 1: like really heartfelt poem, and I remember thinking this would
Speaker 1: be good if you're you know, fourth voted off, fifth,
Speaker 1: like and on and on. First voted off, No one cares,
Speaker 1: No one remembers you. Sorry, Garrett P. It's just true. Actually,
Speaker 1: on our show they do remember you because we keep
Speaker 1: you around for at the Nice Guy Grotto or Limbro.
Speaker 1: But he didn't know that at the time. He's pulling
Speaker 1: out a poem, and I remember thinking, Garrett, now you
Speaker 1: can't you just gotta say goodbye and realize your first
Speaker 1: voted off, no one's gonna remember to you. Because when
Speaker 1: I was first voted off, I did cry. On Dancing
Speaker 1: with Stars, I cried when I was voted off last
Speaker 1: comic standing in the second time. I did it because
Speaker 1: they've asked me about UM calling my parents to tell
Speaker 1: them I didn't make it, and it made me cry
Speaker 1: because my parents were so sweet about it and UM,
Speaker 1: and I was embarrassed that I cried, but it was real.
Speaker 1: And then I cried on Dancing with the Stars because
Speaker 1: it was so embarrassing, you know, And that's why I cried.
Speaker 1: But I didn't. I remember when I started crying. I
Speaker 1: was like, NICKI don't do this. No one came, No
Speaker 1: one's emotional about you leaving, no one's invested in you
Speaker 1: get your first voted off, Like just get out of
Speaker 1: get out of the way, like no one cares, and
Speaker 1: I will, I swear to you. As soon as I left,
Speaker 1: you were there, Noah, weren't you? No one care, not
Speaker 1: like that. It was like I walked out of that
Speaker 1: room and they forgot that I was on the show.
Speaker 1: It was like, pack up your knives and go. Were
Speaker 1: you in the trailer? Was I was blacked out in anger?
Speaker 1: We were in the trailer with me? It wasn't. I
Speaker 1: hope you blacked that out too. I it was not
Speaker 1: a pretty scene. I was like throwing my leotard around
Speaker 1: and just like half naked screaming in front of my dog.
Speaker 1: Off your your eyelashes as that I'll never forget, as
Speaker 1: you were talking about it so funny. Yeah, I ripped
Speaker 1: off those eyelashes because never seen anyone just peel eyelashes
Speaker 1: off like that. I know I'm so rough anyway, and
Speaker 1: especially when I'm just like heartbroken and have to go
Speaker 1: home and I'm not even packed. Um, but I just
Speaker 1: knew that being first voted off it like didn't matter,
Speaker 1: and so I was embarrassed that I was. So the
Speaker 1: most embarrassing thing about getting voted off first was that
Speaker 1: people had to act like they cared. I My most
Speaker 1: uncomfortable thing I think is burdening anyone with caring about
Speaker 1: my feelings. I have a really hard time crying in
Speaker 1: front of people because I feel like people feel like
Speaker 1: they have to stop everything and comfort me, and that
Speaker 1: it's I talked about it with my therapist, Like I
Speaker 1: have a real hard time I have to pay people
Speaker 1: to listen to me cry because I just feel like,
Speaker 1: even though I have a podcast where all I do
Speaker 1: is like talk, and people just have to listen for
Speaker 1: whatever reason, me crying, like I feel like people have
Speaker 1: to like hug me and touch me and they don't
Speaker 1: want to. And my therapist was like, do you not
Speaker 1: want to when people cry? And I'm like, maybe, and
Speaker 1: it's not because I don't want to. Sometimes when people
Speaker 1: start crying, I go, Okay, I gotta cancel the rest
Speaker 1: of my plans today. Like there's a part of me
Speaker 1: that goes this is priority. Everything else has to go away.
Speaker 1: And I get kind of stressed out about that that
Speaker 1: I have to be. I have to stay with this
Speaker 1: person and take care of them. Probably steps from my childhood,
Speaker 1: even though no one in my childhood cried. Maybe that's why.
Speaker 1: But I just I hate when people pity me, and
Speaker 1: it's not deserved, especially when you're verst voted off. So
Speaker 1: that's just like a whole other issue. Let's get back
Speaker 1: to Mr Corman. I don't even know how I got
Speaker 1: from that to that, but I will say that Mr
Speaker 1: corman Um was disappointing and really stressful, and it's a
Speaker 1: show about a guy who has anxiety and is dealing
Speaker 1: with panic disorder. I am so tired of shows where
Speaker 1: women are presented as batship normal women, women who you know,
Speaker 1: by all accounts, their characters are being presented as like,
Speaker 1: this is a woman this guy would date, and then
Speaker 1: the woman turns out to be just so insane and
Speaker 1: so irrational, naggy, just a bitch. And if you watch
Speaker 1: the pilot episode of Mr. Corman, you know who I'm
Speaker 1: talking about. He like goes to this bar. He's He's
Speaker 1: Joseph Gordon Lovett. He's a teacher, fifth grade teacher, lives
Speaker 1: in Los Angeles, broke teacher, lives with a roommate, approaching forties. Single.
Speaker 1: I don't really know what this show is about. Still.
Speaker 1: I saw an episode and a half, maybe two episodes, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I saw too, and um, it's just about his kind
Speaker 1: of descent into anxiety. The whole second episode has this
Speaker 1: bell chiming every I would say minute. So as soon
Speaker 1: as you forget that there's this weird clanging bell, it
Speaker 1: comes again. And I was honestly, I was like, Andrew,
Speaker 1: turned this off. It's it's causing me so much anxiety,
Speaker 1: and he goes, well, I think that's what this is about.
Speaker 1: It's like trying to give you the anxiety that this
Speaker 1: guy feels. And I was like, okay, I guess in
Speaker 1: that way, it's a cool piece of art because it's
Speaker 1: causing you to feel anxious and understand what a panic
Speaker 1: disorder is like, and like chronic anxiety is, Like does
Speaker 1: anyone need to know what that is? By the way,
Speaker 1: is anyone confused about what anxiety is? You know? At
Speaker 1: one point in the show, he opens up his phone
Speaker 1: and it says global climate crisis worse than we thought,
Speaker 1: you know, Like there's some headline which I thought was
Speaker 1: a lovely moment because that is the headline that always
Speaker 1: sends me into a panic. It like just expedites whatever
Speaker 1: panic I'm feeling is when I read a climate change
Speaker 1: news and there's no good climate change news. By the way,
Speaker 1: there's never once been an article with here's a thing
Speaker 1: about the climate that's it's going well, wait, what's that noise?
Speaker 1: Is that nature sounds? Am I going crazy? Wait? There
Speaker 1: are nature sounds coming from something? Oh it's my alarm
Speaker 1: on my Oh my god. I had to download an
Speaker 1: alarm clock on my computer because I didn't have a
Speaker 1: phone yesterday, so I picked nature sounds to wake me
Speaker 1: up instead of like, like, I think what we wake
Speaker 1: up to if you're waking up to a really annoying
Speaker 1: alarm clock sound and I know you're like, well, I
Speaker 1: won't wake up any other way. Try something else, even
Speaker 1: try the absence of noise. Like I have a white
Speaker 1: noise machine and sometimes if I get a call, it
Speaker 1: shuts off and will wake me up, just that the
Speaker 1: silence will wake me up. Anyway. It was nature sounds
Speaker 1: coming out of nowhere, but it was calming. It was
Speaker 1: almost like, and that's so funny. I was just talking
Speaker 1: about the climate crisis, and then all of a sudden
Speaker 1: there was like tree frogs and like a rainforest sound,
Speaker 1: and it was like bulldozing, you know the I always
Speaker 1: say the rainforest cafe. There was one time I saw
Speaker 1: it in a mall. It was one of the funniest
Speaker 1: pictures and I've never taken It was like a rainforest
Speaker 1: cafe was completely gutted and like under construction, and like
Speaker 1: there was just like rubble in this place. And I
Speaker 1: was like, that is the most authentic Rainforce cafe I've
Speaker 1: ever seen. Like, let's let's make all the Rainforce cafes
Speaker 1: updated to have no trees and just loggers running through, uh,
Speaker 1: just decimating species that we haven't even you know, studied
Speaker 1: yet or no exist. Let's destroy them before we know
Speaker 1: they exist, So let me wrap this up. Mr Corman
Speaker 1: is not my type of show. It is the female
Speaker 1: character that is brought in. What was the show I
Speaker 1: was watching the other day that I was just like,
Speaker 1: I am so tired of female characters being written by men.
Speaker 1: And I know that's a thing that gets said a
Speaker 1: lot of like the male gaze. Uh, there was a
Speaker 1: there's a really great video if you watch the male
Speaker 1: gaze versus the female gaze, exploring movies and how a director, writer,
Speaker 1: producer through the lens of like, the women presented through
Speaker 1: the male gaze are always either sexual jacks or like
Speaker 1: the worst people ever because there they hate their wives
Speaker 1: or whatever, and so they have to take it out
Speaker 1: in their scripts and they're the way they shoot things.
Speaker 1: But there's a really interesting video that explores Birds of
Speaker 1: Prey versus Um Suicide Squad, which is uh, you know,
Speaker 1: studying what's her name, uh, Margot Robbie's character, Um, the
Speaker 1: one with the pigtails. We all know, Harley quinns Harley Quinn. Um,
Speaker 1: it's it's this girl does a whole like. Uh. So
Speaker 1: Suicide Squad was done by a man, of course, and
Speaker 1: then Birds Prey was directed by a woman, and it
Speaker 1: shows the difference of like the shots the wardrobe, how
Speaker 1: she's sexualized in one and Birds of Prey is I
Speaker 1: guess I haven't seen either of them, but undeniably better
Speaker 1: than um then Suicide Squad, although some would say Birds
Speaker 1: of Prey wouldn't even exist. I Suicide Squad wasn't decent enough.
Speaker 1: But it's a really interesting I always gonna roll my
Speaker 1: eyes at those things of like the male gaze, like
Speaker 1: it's just almost like God, men are gonna hate us
Speaker 1: because all we do is talk about how they suck.
Speaker 1: But it's really interesting to see how. I mean, you
Speaker 1: can't you can't deny that men perceive women differently than
Speaker 1: than women do, and it's just interesting to see it
Speaker 1: through cinema. But I gotta say, Joseph Gordon love and
Speaker 1: I know he is an artist and someone who I
Speaker 1: would probably never say this to his face and deny
Speaker 1: that I ever said it, but the way that he
Speaker 1: wrote these characters, this female character, and pretty much actually
Speaker 1: he's across the board every single character in this show.
Speaker 1: Please watch it. Please, everyone watched the pilot episode of
Speaker 1: this or the first episode, and tell me what you think,
Speaker 1: because everyone on this show behaves like a character and
Speaker 1: curb your enthusiasm, and by that I mean curb your enthusiasm.
Speaker 1: Sometimes can be HD dubs, just because every character no
Speaker 1: one would say that, you know, Like Larry David will
Speaker 1: be crossing the street and someone go, are you gonna
Speaker 1: pick up that trash man? And he's like, well, I
Speaker 1: didn't throw it on that trash so they're like pick
Speaker 1: it up, and You're like, no one talks like No
Speaker 1: one confronts people as much as ever Larry Dave gets confronted,
Speaker 1: you know, But you know that's for comedic effect. This
Speaker 1: show is supposed to be like realism. Tell me one
Speaker 1: line in that show that anyone would ever say in
Speaker 1: real life. And I know it's a show, but no
Speaker 1: one talks like that. And the female character that he
Speaker 1: hooks up with is one of the worst people I
Speaker 1: have ever seen. And guess what I think it's on you.
Speaker 1: I know, Joseph Gordon Love is supposed to be the
Speaker 1: victim in that scenario. This girl is so mean to him. Well,
Speaker 1: why are you attracted her? Why did you go home
Speaker 1: with her? Why would you sign up for this abusive person?
Speaker 1: When really I think it's this is a way for
Speaker 1: men to watch TV and further bolster their hatred of
Speaker 1: women because this girl is presented as like a cool,
Speaker 1: attractive girl that you would take home from a bar,
Speaker 1: and then she turns out to be a total asshole.
Speaker 1: No one would ever talk this way. He can't get
Speaker 1: an erection. She's a forty year old woman, going, what
Speaker 1: does this happen all the time? To you? Is it me?
Speaker 1: It's like who no forty year old woman would ever
Speaker 1: yell at a guy that loses direction on a first
Speaker 1: date and make it about them. I just don't see
Speaker 1: that happening anymore. Maybe yours at home screaming phone saying yes,
Speaker 1: it would happen. But so this is all leads to
Speaker 1: the fact that me and Andrew went live last night.
Speaker 1: We're gonna get to it in a second. I want
Speaker 1: to talk more about Mr Corman. I promise you we
Speaker 1: won't talk about the Bachelorette because it's over. Uh and
Speaker 1: I'm about to get on the flight to Canada. Hey,
Speaker 1: I was just talking about Mr Corman, And by talking,
Speaker 1: I mean I was like furiously going off on how
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's shot really beautifully. I really like
Speaker 1: the way he directs. It's kind of like shot like
Speaker 1: five days of summer cool angles, Like he's cinematically like
Speaker 1: has a really good eye. Um. Even though uh, the
Speaker 1: writing though, especially for that female character and pretty much
Speaker 1: every character we realized sucks on the show. This is
Speaker 1: a guy. We don't know why we're rooting for this guy.
Speaker 1: He's an asshole. He's not that. There's nothing. No. One
Speaker 1: just looked it up while we were waiting for you
Speaker 1: to come in, and she's she read that it's a
Speaker 1: comedy drama. Do you think it's funny? Did you laugh? Ever?
Speaker 1: And because we throw that around loosely, I guess it's quirky.
Speaker 1: Ne'er once did I laugh? I do feel like it's
Speaker 1: setting it up, like I think it's slow playing it
Speaker 1: of like I don't need four episodes before I get
Speaker 1: a goddamn laugh. That is bullshit. That is show. That's two.
Speaker 1: That's no. You find a laugh within four minutes or
Speaker 1: I'm out, And that is even too long. You do
Speaker 1: not call yourself a comedy just because you once did
Speaker 1: a project with Zoey Deschanel. You know what, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: I also like realized when I was watching it that
Speaker 1: there was too much. And I never really think about
Speaker 1: editing because I don't really like see things that way.
Speaker 1: But when you're watching this show, a lot of it
Speaker 1: is the other characters in the scene. Like it's not
Speaker 1: like a point of view shot, so I was noticing.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, there was not like a lot of
Speaker 1: over the shoulder, so it's just like almost just like
Speaker 1: one continued shot, you know what. I almost felt like
Speaker 1: it felt like you were on drugs, and I think
Speaker 1: that's why it was. It was it felt like an
Speaker 1: anxiety attack the way. But I think that was cool.
Speaker 1: Wait was shot, but what were you so like I
Speaker 1: was noticing like the faces, Like so if I was
Speaker 1: talking and you have to be active listening, I was
Speaker 1: like focusing on the other person's face and it was
Speaker 1: just too much for me. Where I wasn't getting interesting.
Speaker 1: Does that make sense, you know? But because it's really
Speaker 1: hard to describe what you're trying to describe. But I
Speaker 1: I think I kind of whatever a good actor even
Speaker 1: when they're not talking. It's like paying attention in a
Speaker 1: way or like I don't know, under something about to
Speaker 1: put engine. It just it just didn't feel real. It
Speaker 1: felt like we were watching a play that's I told
Speaker 1: you that. While we're watching it, I was like, this
Speaker 1: feels too actory. The thing is, Joseph Gordon Lovett is
Speaker 1: obviously a good actor. But I just I love don Juan.
Speaker 1: We were talking about that. He it was the guy
Speaker 1: with a porn addiction with Charla Johansson. He was great
Speaker 1: in that that was written by him directed, So I
Speaker 1: love his work. I did um the roast of Rob Blow.
Speaker 1: I think he uh he m C that he was
Speaker 1: the Oh no, no, no, I feel I forget. I
Speaker 1: told I just told him. I remember on one roast
Speaker 1: he was the host, you know, like the what's the
Speaker 1: m C? And I said, Joseph Gordon Lovett, um, you're
Speaker 1: so adorable. I bet you eat pussy, but only with
Speaker 1: the crust cut off. That was Joe Kristen by h
Speaker 1: Connor mcspadden. Um. Although actually I think I wrote it.
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. No, I didn't write egg, but I
Speaker 1: just like that show really infuriated me because of that
Speaker 1: female character when he didn't get hard. I mean pretty
Speaker 1: much everyone in the show is terrible, like not not
Speaker 1: a bad actor, but like just a terrible yes, but
Speaker 1: not in this way. It was so egregiously bad. No,
Speaker 1: do you know any woman who would behave that way
Speaker 1: in her late thirties? There's only one good line that
Speaker 1: I because I wasn't really paying attention. So if J
Speaker 1: g L you're listening, I have no right to trash
Speaker 1: her show like this. I was like half eating, Like
Speaker 1: I was in my phone looking up flights on my computer.
Speaker 1: I was distracted so like, and there was a I
Speaker 1: was already anxious. There's this gong bell going off. But
Speaker 1: the thing is that, uh, there was one great line
Speaker 1: in it. He hooks up with this girl. He meets
Speaker 1: her at a bar. He's trying to like figure out
Speaker 1: what do what do people in their late thirties do?
Speaker 1: Like his life kind of sucks. His roommates always just
Speaker 1: want the same play video games. He's like, the only
Speaker 1: alternative is going to a bar, Like isn't there something
Speaker 1: in between? So he ends up at a bar by himself.
Speaker 1: He meets this girl. She's like smoking a cigarette, like
Speaker 1: why aren't you drinking? And like why don't you smoke?
Speaker 1: Like just like kind of giving him ship. She's like
Speaker 1: a bit, and then they go home together and they're
Speaker 1: hooking up on the couch and he can't. He can't.
Speaker 1: He loses his direction and she immediately gets upset with him,
Speaker 1: which I don't think that happened to me. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: has anyone gotten upset with you? No? No, no no, I'm
Speaker 1: saying that's what she said. Yeah, this is that's what
Speaker 1: she said. This has never happened to me. Uh does
Speaker 1: this send to you a lot? That's what she said
Speaker 1: to him. There's been women that I haven't been able
Speaker 1: to get hard or like, can they confront you with it?
Speaker 1: They don't confront, but they'll they'll they will blame themselves, sure,
Speaker 1: but they won't confront, but they won't blame themselves in
Speaker 1: front of you. They'll just quiet. You assume they're blaming
Speaker 1: themselves because they're a little bit quieter. And like what
Speaker 1: she say, I'm trying to remember the exactly And this
Speaker 1: isn't a girlfriend. This is a hook up, a one
Speaker 1: time hook up, one time hook up. If I would
Speaker 1: never happen, well, I've been hammered drunk, right, okay, but
Speaker 1: let me just say the one great line. So she's like, Noah,
Speaker 1: you'll like this. She's like this, like kind of she's
Speaker 1: like approaching for she's probably my age and that's why
Speaker 1: I loved this line. And she's a total count, and
Speaker 1: I guess this line kind of like really cemented that
Speaker 1: she's supposed to be a count and he's actually a
Speaker 1: count too. Because they're both single and their forties, why
Speaker 1: aren't they married? And she's just like, you know, they're
Speaker 1: they're about to part ways. She's like, you have a
Speaker 1: fucking limptic and your breath smells, and he's like, my
Speaker 1: breath smells because I smoked one of your cigarettes. I
Speaker 1: would have never gone home with you, like I was
Speaker 1: having to like I was gagging kissing you. They were
Speaker 1: being so many to each other, and then you think
Speaker 1: that there's gonna be this like detent of like they
Speaker 1: kind of agree that they're both shitty and then they'll
Speaker 1: make out, you know, like there's this moment and the
Speaker 1: and the only problem with having subtitles on our close caption,
Speaker 1: which I have all the time, because you can never
Speaker 1: hear anything. I'm like losing my um hearing, probably because
Speaker 1: I am so freaking loud, even I'm annoyed with my
Speaker 1: own voice. Today it's kind of hoarse because we were
Speaker 1: singing last night, which I'll get to. But she goes
Speaker 1: this joke with joke was roomed. Sometimes close captions ruin
Speaker 1: the joke because so many jokes are because you don't
Speaker 1: see them coming. That's what a joke is is a
Speaker 1: surprise of like, oh I didn't expect that. That surprises me, ha,
Speaker 1: and then you laugh because laughing is a response to
Speaker 1: surprise because surprise is fear because it's off the usual.
Speaker 1: So this is like evolutionary and if I'm wrong, please
Speaker 1: someone correct me. That knows better, but I think, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, scientists or anthropologists have kind of determined that
Speaker 1: laughing is a response to surprise. Surprise is fear. If
Speaker 1: you're scared of something like a saber tooth tiger back
Speaker 1: when your cavemen, baring your teeth would scare the predator
Speaker 1: away better than not, so like going like this, uh,
Speaker 1: laughter is a way for you to be is a
Speaker 1: h an involuntary response to surprise, so that you bare
Speaker 1: your teeth and maybe survive because and you scare the
Speaker 1: animal that you have canines. Does that make sense unless
Speaker 1: you're you? And I mean, you gotta show that your
Speaker 1: molders to someone and the people really get scared. They go,
Speaker 1: is this guy taking care of himself he's probably got
Speaker 1: a shower toothbrush tiger. So this girl says, So they're
Speaker 1: at this moment and he just looks at her and
Speaker 1: he goes, do you know at what? At what point?
Speaker 1: And you think they're gonna he's gonna say something sweet
Speaker 1: because they've been yelling, and then they kind of have
Speaker 1: this moment of like calm and they're both looking at
Speaker 1: each other and it's a close up on her face
Speaker 1: and she just it's not even on her face yet.
Speaker 1: As he's saying, it goes to her face and it's
Speaker 1: just a shot of her where the lighting is bad.
Speaker 1: She kind of you can see her skins a little bit.
Speaker 1: You can see how old she is, which is a
Speaker 1: great shot, and she's beautiful and it's not I'm not
Speaker 1: saying that it's bad how old she is, but it
Speaker 1: just fits with this line and I would give the
Speaker 1: show an Emmy just for the scene. Do you remember this? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What is? He say? So he looks at her and
Speaker 1: he says, do you know at what point in your
Speaker 1: life you knew like when you were a little goes,
Speaker 1: think back to when you were he goes, when you
Speaker 1: were young, when you were a young girl, and he goes,
Speaker 1: not like a child, but like a younger woman. Do
Speaker 1: you remember at what point in your life you knew
Speaker 1: that you were going to die alone? And it was
Speaker 1: just so. It's but I saw it coming because the
Speaker 1: caption was up. But if I wouldn't have, I think
Speaker 1: I might have loved this show because it would have
Speaker 1: really that that line was so And the girl's face.
Speaker 1: While he says that the girl's face, it's the right
Speaker 1: kind of bags under her eyes. She kind of has
Speaker 1: a smoker's pallor like the girl. I know this girl.
Speaker 1: I noticed girl that keeps partying throughout her thirties or
Speaker 1: even and it could be a guy chip on her shoulder.
Speaker 1: She's mad because one guy broke her heart and gave
Speaker 1: her her bees, and now she takes it out on
Speaker 1: the rest of everyone, but maybe not her bees, but
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like, but yeah, a guy
Speaker 1: has treated her shitty. She was very beautiful in college.
Speaker 1: He probably over partying in college. He probably gotta. Now
Speaker 1: she has an addiction to alcohol and she can't stop partying,
Speaker 1: and her friends have fallen off and herself in a bar.
Speaker 1: She lives alone. She doesn't have roommates. She's just listen,
Speaker 1: I am that. Yeah, and you might be that girl,
Speaker 1: but you probably if you're listening to this podcast, you
Speaker 1: are not a bit like that. But does that line really?
Speaker 1: I loved it because I felt it so hard because
Speaker 1: there have been times where I'm like, I've had that
Speaker 1: realization that like I am of an age where most
Speaker 1: women my age are like married with with my level
Speaker 1: of success. My I'm not not bragging, but like I'm
Speaker 1: a good looking lady. I stay in like I am social,
Speaker 1: I meet a lot of people most there's something going
Speaker 1: on with me that I don't have a partner if
Speaker 1: I if I do want one, and I do want one,
Speaker 1: so there's something If someone said that to me, I
Speaker 1: would feel so seen. And I think that's why I
Speaker 1: loved it. I want to get to really a very
Speaker 1: long time. Yeah, until you met wee baby tomorrow baby,
Speaker 1: I love her, give her, give her a hug around
Speaker 1: that tiny little waist, her waist so fucking tiny that
Speaker 1: like I don't it's a new hot that has emerged.
Speaker 1: It's a new like I don't think girls had bodies
Speaker 1: like this in the when I was growing up, Like
Speaker 1: it is a type of body, the tiny waist, the perfect,
Speaker 1: but sorry to sexualize you. Brughtn up, but like tell
Speaker 1: your body like to stop being so hot. But she's
Speaker 1: just got like a tiny waist. It almost looks it's
Speaker 1: the kind of body that, like, I think a lot
Speaker 1: of girls have like lipos A lot of skinny women
Speaker 1: out there have liposuction. I didn't know that. Um, everyone
Speaker 1: listening that when you see I always thought lipi section
Speaker 1: was for like already kind of bigger women, to just
Speaker 1: make them a little less bigger. No judgment there, but
Speaker 1: that's what I thought it was. I didn't know skinny
Speaker 1: women like I could get LiPo section and look like
Speaker 1: way like I could kind of turn a to an
Speaker 1: Instagram thought if I sucked out, I could suck out
Speaker 1: my waist put it in my ass. Brenna looks like
Speaker 1: someone who has had that stuff done. But that's like
Speaker 1: her natural body. And I don't know where it comes.
Speaker 1: Like it's a new type of hot that has emerged,
Speaker 1: and I don't know where it came from. When he
Speaker 1: puts athletic clothes on, it's dulus. Why are you every
Speaker 1: morning other minute? Um No, we love you so much
Speaker 1: and we miss you, Branna, We miss you, and I
Speaker 1: say that like with sarcasm, but I actually do miss
Speaker 1: you and love you and I'm so excited for all
Speaker 1: the good news in your life. If you're listening, um,
Speaker 1: really quick, we gotta get to the news. But right before,
Speaker 1: I just want to give a shout out to everyone
Speaker 1: who was on our Instagram live last night. We had
Speaker 1: no we had two hundred people, which for we have
Speaker 1: like fourteen points I think two thousand followers on our Instagram,
Speaker 1: which is insane and it really speaks volumes for how
Speaker 1: popular our show is because I know podcasts and how
Speaker 1: many followers they have when they don't have a private account.
Speaker 1: We have a private out, so people have to request
Speaker 1: access and like want it right, and that means we
Speaker 1: have pressed except fourteen thousand times, which is kind of
Speaker 1: crazy too between the three of us, but I'm not
Speaker 1: doing it mostly I think it's Noah, and um, so
Speaker 1: you've pressed your phone times, and Andrew, it's you, Okay,
Speaker 1: it's really a lot as and there, Yeah, well you
Speaker 1: should you wrote the jokes and so so last night. Noah,
Speaker 1: it was so so last night. I just want to
Speaker 1: say that we uh, we did an Instagram live. I
Speaker 1: didn't know that Andrew had gone live on Nikki glazer Pod.
Speaker 1: I thought he went live on his. So I'm on
Speaker 1: my computer just like in the background, kind of being
Speaker 1: a bit, like not a bit, but like like not
Speaker 1: on you know, like but and then I realized how
Speaker 1: important the best these are to me, because as soon
Speaker 1: as I saw that it was Nicki lazer Pod, I
Speaker 1: did a double take, and I go, is that Nicky
Speaker 1: lazer Pod? I go, Andrew, why didn't you tell me?
Speaker 1: I would have been so much nicer, like I love
Speaker 1: our fans so much I was. I wouldn't have been fake.
Speaker 1: I was just like, it's not my When Andrew goes
Speaker 1: live on his it's not my. I am a a
Speaker 1: bowl in the background. I'm a part of the set.
Speaker 1: I'm not like a focal point that's my name's on that.
Speaker 1: And I want to and and if they're watching, I
Speaker 1: never want to make a bestie feel like they're not
Speaker 1: seeing because I appreciate you guys listening so much, and
Speaker 1: you know, as someone with low self esteems, some days
Speaker 1: I'm like, why are they listening? I gotta be honest,
Speaker 1: Like there's some days that I just go, like they
Speaker 1: like me, they really like me, Like Sally Field accepting
Speaker 1: an oscar. So I appreciate you. Um, but we went
Speaker 1: crazy last night. It was so fun, I really, Andrew.
Speaker 1: I just want to thank you so much for um
Speaker 1: being down to to go. First of all, I never
Speaker 1: am someone who's like, let's go live. Andrew does it,
Speaker 1: and I'm always like, I guess I'll go, but I'm
Speaker 1: dying to go live all like, I will go live
Speaker 1: any time, even if it's on his account. I love
Speaker 1: being in the background. I always never want to start
Speaker 1: it because I feel like it's so like, look at me,
Speaker 1: you know. But I'll let Andrew do that because he's
Speaker 1: not He's a man. He doesn't have a problem with
Speaker 1: like asking for attention. I'm like, I have it in
Speaker 1: like inside my bones that I don't deserve it even
Speaker 1: though I demand you guys listen to me an hour
Speaker 1: and a half every day. UM. So none of this
Speaker 1: is really checking out Nikki. Uh. But anyway, Andrew, I
Speaker 1: just want to thank you for uh like that was
Speaker 1: so fun last night. And um one of the best
Speaker 1: sis requested the guitar and I was sitting there quietly
Speaker 1: like dying for someone to request that I play guitar
Speaker 1: because I like need to perform, but I don't want
Speaker 1: to make anyone watch me. I want someone to ask
Speaker 1: to watch me, because I'm never going to ask someone
Speaker 1: to watch me. It's too embarrassing. And you were talking
Speaker 1: about it, uh, probably five or six times where you're like,
Speaker 1: I want to do a concert on zoom for like
Speaker 1: five or six or anyone that's like into Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: and maybe I'll see it. Yeah, like people whatever, And
Speaker 1: so I kind of was thinking about that in a
Speaker 1: way where I was like, this could be this is
Speaker 1: a fun moment where she can show her talents where
Speaker 1: where the stakes are lower, and I'm right by you.
Speaker 1: I'm having one. We had these microphones that are like
Speaker 1: amplified that are unbelievable. I don't know. They got these
Speaker 1: karaoke mics that got sent to me by Cosmo magazine.
Speaker 1: I did this video for them that's gonna come up
Speaker 1: pretty soon where they sent me a bunch of stuff
Speaker 1: that's one is an an expensive version and one's the
Speaker 1: expensive version. And I was supposed to do a blind
Speaker 1: like appraisal of each of these, like where I didn't
Speaker 1: know which was which, but I forgot to give you
Speaker 1: the box to organize for me. So to make it blind.
Speaker 1: They were like, is someone there so they can take
Speaker 1: all the things in the box, so you don't know
Speaker 1: which is which. So I went through the box. I
Speaker 1: already knew kind of some of the stuff, but one
Speaker 1: was these karaoke mics. And they're so cool. You guys
Speaker 1: gotta get one. Um they're called like Bonnaroo or bonham
Speaker 1: Mic or something, but um, they're amazing. And the amplification
Speaker 1: of them, it's like, there's such a fun device. We'll
Speaker 1: we'll see them a lot on our Instagram live because
Speaker 1: we'll be using it again. But we were, we were
Speaker 1: singing on them. And then Andrew went live and he
Speaker 1: started rapping about egg plants. Whether it's an egg or plant?
Speaker 1: Great question. And then I guess baby eggplants look like eggs.
Speaker 1: That's why they got their name that way, That's what
Speaker 1: someone said in our comments. And then someone asked to
Speaker 1: play guitar. I instantly picked up the guitar. You you know,
Speaker 1: I got a like an amp in the sucking room.
Speaker 1: I picked up. I had my own mike, he had
Speaker 1: his little karaoke mike, and we I got to sing
Speaker 1: all these Tailor Swift songs. I pulled up the lyrics
Speaker 1: so he could sing with me. Some of them were terrible,
Speaker 1: some of them were better than others. I didn't read
Speaker 1: any comments because I was so scared someone who's going
Speaker 1: to be like, what do I want? Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: It was so freaking fun. And that's why I'm a
Speaker 1: pony today. A pony, yeah, a little horse. Oh I
Speaker 1: call it a pony. Oh I thought a pony. I
Speaker 1: was just bringing you in on a joke. I already
Speaker 1: made a joke that I had with the with the
Speaker 1: fans that you weren't in yet. I like, I like,
Speaker 1: I thought, like you're a pony because you're like happy
Speaker 1: like a pony. I see a pony like prancing, like
Speaker 1: I'm a pony in that way. And I'm also a
Speaker 1: little horse because I was screaming, I'm of the deep bed.
Speaker 1: I mean you sounded great. Oh, thank you, Andrew. Let's
Speaker 1: get to the news. That news apparently, oh man, it's Thursday,
Speaker 1: but you know what that means. You're probably listening on
Speaker 1: Friday morning. However, I'm hope we have all the swell.
Speaker 1: Do you have a great weekend out there? Be safe,
Speaker 1: mask up, no condom. Okay, lot's have fun. All right,
Speaker 1: first story, it's a big news story. It's a doozy.
Speaker 1: This one is actually a doozy. Um Andrew Como doesn't
Speaker 1: think he crossed the line. As he resigns, he says
Speaker 1: he's Italian. I heard this. I mean, I mean it
Speaker 1: is wild the Italian. I saw a license plate frame
Speaker 1: the other day on my run and it said I'm
Speaker 1: Italian on it. It's just and I go, we know
Speaker 1: it was a vest. But you know, some people just
Speaker 1: lean into being Italian so much, like I love family
Speaker 1: and food, I'm Italian. It's like, oh yeah, real original.
Speaker 1: Have you been to Italy? And I'm not trying to brag,
Speaker 1: but if you go to Italy, they're all like metrosexual
Speaker 1: men who were like ty like the idea that Italian
Speaker 1: the Italian, and then there's like Italy Italian. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: they would hate Italy Italians even though they wear jewelry
Speaker 1: and slicked back their hair and their metrids actually on
Speaker 1: their own way, yes, yes, but it's just so. And
Speaker 1: they like kiss and they hold hands down the street
Speaker 1: and stuff, and like did you see those two Olympians
Speaker 1: that like we're nearly making out because they were on
Speaker 1: the same team Truck and Field team, and they were
Speaker 1: all like it's they start kissing each other and like
Speaker 1: hugging each other. They're two really hot guys that are
Speaker 1: just so excited they won gold and one's being interviewed
Speaker 1: and the other comes up and it's just like jumping up.
Speaker 1: I don't know if they're Italian, but they were some
Speaker 1: kind of European where like it's okay for men to
Speaker 1: show affection and kiss each other. It was so hot.
Speaker 1: It's on a subreddit called suddenly Gay that I follow,
Speaker 1: where like things start out like not gay and then
Speaker 1: suddenly it gets really gay and it's a really great
Speaker 1: like you suddenly become gay from what you're watching. Oh,
Speaker 1: that could be too, but no, it's usually like what's
Speaker 1: happening becomes kind of gay. I mean this idea that
Speaker 1: you know whatever, you know, times have changed. Back in
Speaker 1: my day, I could, you know, finger a girl's asshole
Speaker 1: and that's just be an Italian and sixty Yeah, I know.
Speaker 1: I use that argument though with some stuff of like
Speaker 1: oh I used to say that word because back then
Speaker 1: that word wasn't taboo and I didn't know it was wrong.
Speaker 1: You know, the en we're just became bad to say,
Speaker 1: but he kept groping them today, so you can't you
Speaker 1: need to change with it. Yes, he could say back
Speaker 1: in nineteen seventy, I might have girls like blood. It's
Speaker 1: it's check and me. Yeah, I'm grabbing tents over it.
Speaker 1: And me is the name of the lawsuit filed by
Speaker 1: the tree women. Who have you had to deal with
Speaker 1: greeting him in a private hallway? Um yeah, it's it's
Speaker 1: I'm sure that Italian Americans are rolling their eyes at
Speaker 1: this and their uh, you know, Cannoli's do you roll
Speaker 1: a Cannoli? But there was a time during COVID do
Speaker 1: you remember for like two months where he was God,
Speaker 1: you know, it's just so funny when these politicians like
Speaker 1: these girls, plenty of women that I knew, were like,
Speaker 1: I want to fuck Andrew Coma. Yeah, there was a
Speaker 1: saying I forget what it was. There's something about like
Speaker 1: como sexual. L Oh. Yeah, see that's the thing we
Speaker 1: used to be able to say and now we can't anymore.
Speaker 1: Um no, that that is really interesting. He was like that.
Speaker 1: You know, he was heralded as this hero and he
Speaker 1: was going he got an Emmy, he got an admance,
Speaker 1: he put out a book before he put out a
Speaker 1: yeah during COVID saying how wonderfully he handled it, which
Speaker 1: he didn't. I'm sorry, this is a narcissist. These are
Speaker 1: all the signs of a narcissist who when these people
Speaker 1: come out and get me too. I mean literally every
Speaker 1: single man who has been me too, um has I
Speaker 1: would say maybe not Matt Lower. That was one that
Speaker 1: I really was shocked by because he just he never
Speaker 1: like came off to me like a like an asshole
Speaker 1: before that. I'm sure people that if I knew anyone
Speaker 1: who worked with them, they would have been like, oh,
Speaker 1: he's an asshole and then and they wouldn't have even
Speaker 1: shared a me too story, just like he's not fun
Speaker 1: to work with. Share me one example of someone who
Speaker 1: is disgusting with women and feels entitled to women who
Speaker 1: work beneath him or are on the same level a
Speaker 1: lot of times or above him, just feels entitled to women,
Speaker 1: and show me that man who is also nice to men.
Speaker 1: I think that there's one case in particular that I
Speaker 1: remember this all opened wide for me was a personal
Speaker 1: friend of mine who worked on a show with one
Speaker 1: of these dudes that have been me too, said that, um,
Speaker 1: he was triggered by all the stories coming out about
Speaker 1: this man doing gross things to women because he was
Speaker 1: a man who worked for this guy on a show
Speaker 1: and in the stories that of this man making women
Speaker 1: uncomfortable and degrading them. And he said, we're so similar
Speaker 1: in nature to how he felt just um, not sexually
Speaker 1: being obviously preyed upon, but just humiliated, an office bullied, um, powerless,
Speaker 1: all of those feelings. Men that generally do the gross
Speaker 1: things to women are doing gross things to everyone. And
Speaker 1: if you want to know who's doing gross things to
Speaker 1: men or to women, look, look who's just being an asshole?
Speaker 1: Look who who? Look who you work with? Who is
Speaker 1: just a despicable asshole who thinks he's above everyone else?
Speaker 1: And that's someone who probably does discussing things to men
Speaker 1: or women based on their sexual preference. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: there was I forget who wrote the tweet. But do
Speaker 1: you think that an adult, an adult can be groomed? Right,
Speaker 1: there's no age on unlike driven, But at what point
Speaker 1: do you think an adult has agency over their own
Speaker 1: like decisions where it's like, well you could have made it,
Speaker 1: you could have got it, you could have not done that.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean when you don't work for them, Uh,
Speaker 1: your your money, your financial stability, and your job doesn't
Speaker 1: depend on them. They're not in a position of power
Speaker 1: over you, dictated by how much they make or the
Speaker 1: corporate ladder. And I mean, yeah, you got to have
Speaker 1: some kind of That's why I like got managed. Just
Speaker 1: Gord Lovett, for his character, seemed to be the victim
Speaker 1: of this woman's aggression when it's really like, well, why
Speaker 1: did you go home with this girl who was nothing
Speaker 1: but mean? Do you before that? And I'm not saying
Speaker 1: he deserved that because he like asked for it, but yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean when I've been doing press about F boy
Speaker 1: and everyone's like, how did you know the difference between
Speaker 1: that boy and I'm like, if I'm attracted to them,
Speaker 1: they're probably an F boy. And that's because I need
Speaker 1: to work on myself to be attracted to something that's
Speaker 1: not like I have some agency in the fact that
Speaker 1: I've been manipulated and heartbroken by men. So both could
Speaker 1: be true. I guess I guess you could say I do.
Speaker 1: I should have had a little bit more agency. Also,
Speaker 1: they had power over me, so I couldn't do it.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, Like these women shouldn't have
Speaker 1: been wearing the highest Italian fashions. I mean, if you're
Speaker 1: gonna wear a Valentino, you're gonna get your for that.
Speaker 1: But no, I mean I never uh like in a
Speaker 1: position of power with someone like Cuomo who just like
Speaker 1: thinks he's above everything. You think they're better than everyone, doesn't.
Speaker 1: He always looks sweaty. He just looks like he's always sweaty,
Speaker 1: and he probably has a wife beater on underneath. And
Speaker 1: if that man tried to like hug me or molest me,
Speaker 1: I would be frozen in fear and allow it because
Speaker 1: he has this like intimidated like give him what he
Speaker 1: wants vibe and that, And honestly he looks sweaty and
Speaker 1: deranged like he could hurt you. That's the thing people
Speaker 1: always go, why didn't like with the Louis thing of
Speaker 1: did he block the door he was masturbating in the
Speaker 1: in front of the women. He didn't block the door.
Speaker 1: When a guy is jerking off in front of you
Speaker 1: out of nowhere, even if it's not out of nowhere,
Speaker 1: even when he goes I'm about to say about my dick,
Speaker 1: Is that cool? And it's just even that statement is
Speaker 1: out of nowhere. As a woman, you just don't know
Speaker 1: what you show your teeth and then he goes, never
Speaker 1: mind putting my dick away. Let's get to the next
Speaker 1: story too much. Uh okay, this one and I don't
Speaker 1: know if the doozy uh, it's I think the story.
Speaker 1: Second story always has to be a doozy no matter what. Okay.
Speaker 1: Many parents are saying no to sleepovers because of anxieties
Speaker 1: like sexual abuse, but child development experts say sleepovers can
Speaker 1: be important developmental step for children, helping them navigate independence, practicetibility,
Speaker 1: and gain exposure different family cultures like Italians. I would
Speaker 1: be reluctant to allow um my daughter or son who
Speaker 1: was of an age. Well, you remember sleep, I mean sleep,
Speaker 1: But when I was a kid, it was so cool
Speaker 1: to sleep like age. Did you guys start sleepovers? Well,
Speaker 1: my parents literally sent us to sleepover camp for two months.
Speaker 1: They sent my little brother to sleep away camp when
Speaker 1: he was six for two months, six years old. That
Speaker 1: the most wild thing you've ever heard. And it wasn't
Speaker 1: even our camp that we were at. It was a
Speaker 1: camp like a couple of miles down the road. But
Speaker 1: he was six. I mean it is that makes that
Speaker 1: breaks my heart for a year. I mean I was like,
Speaker 1: I think I was eight or nine when I got
Speaker 1: sent to but anyways, Sleepover wanted to go. That's different.
Speaker 1: I would just be worried about any men that live
Speaker 1: at the house, any fathers, brothers. If I had a
Speaker 1: daughter or a son um and if I think at
Speaker 1: about the age of like thirteen, I would be like
Speaker 1: we and I'm not a parent, and I have no
Speaker 1: idea what I would actually do, So just please listen
Speaker 1: to this with a grain of salt. Is someone who's
Speaker 1: not a parent, and so I don't understand what it's
Speaker 1: actually like. But I would think that I would be
Speaker 1: a little bit cautious under the age of thirteen. If
Speaker 1: I had a child that was I would I would
Speaker 1: need to prepare them that if anything ever happened. I
Speaker 1: would probably give the same dog my mom gave. Would
Speaker 1: just never be alone with a man in a room
Speaker 1: if if if he looks like someone that could hold
Speaker 1: you down and like you couldn't get away, don't be
Speaker 1: alone because and if and if you are like I
Speaker 1: don't know, hold your phone so it does that emergency thing.
Speaker 1: I don't I would be just like cautious of the
Speaker 1: adult men at sleepover as more so than the bullying
Speaker 1: that might happen from the children. But don't you, like
Speaker 1: I remember sleepovers? I I don't. I mean, I know,
Speaker 1: obviously this happens, but I just don't remember to parents
Speaker 1: ever really being it be like me and Jeff are
Speaker 1: gonna go play Sega for six hours and then sleep
Speaker 1: and you know, yeah, I just don't remember hanging out
Speaker 1: with the parents that at all. And I'm not saying
Speaker 1: that that. I just wonder, like how close do you
Speaker 1: have to be with the other parents to feel comfortable
Speaker 1: sending your kid that, Like could it just be another
Speaker 1: kid on the team and you don't really even never
Speaker 1: met the father? Or like how how well should the
Speaker 1: parents don't know? I would want to just like know
Speaker 1: what kind of house they're going to. I would want to.
Speaker 1: I would just want to meet the parents because I
Speaker 1: feel like I could not that you can always get
Speaker 1: a vibe of who's gonna molest your child or not.
Speaker 1: Certainly that's not the case. These people are great at
Speaker 1: grooming and convincing everyone in a child's life that they're
Speaker 1: in good hands. Um, But no, I would I would
Speaker 1: be uh, I would just make sure my child knows
Speaker 1: that uh they or I would do my best because
Speaker 1: you can never know for sure, to make sure that
Speaker 1: my child is comfortable telling me anything weird that happens.
Speaker 1: And it's okay to make a huge scene if you
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable at all, and that you will never be
Speaker 1: I will never or be mad at you for um,
Speaker 1: like being scared of something that isn't actually there or something,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. And yeah, and I also
Speaker 1: think that like there is in the article it talks
Speaker 1: about how like you should give your kid the ability
Speaker 1: to have freedom to then make choices even if they
Speaker 1: are uncomfortable, not like molestation, but like something you know,
Speaker 1: just going somewhere else. If you shelter them too much,
Speaker 1: essentially you're they're not going to become good adults. So
Speaker 1: there is a line there. Do you remember any like
Speaker 1: sleepovers for yourself, like that we're weird or or not weird,
Speaker 1: like sexually weird, but like that we're funny or anything.
Speaker 1: Would you have a lot of sleep over? You know? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's all my friends and I did was
Speaker 1: sleep over at each other's houses. And it was like
Speaker 1: the most fun thing. I would never deny my children
Speaker 1: that experience because it was just it created such one
Speaker 1: of my first ever sleepovers, I called I had to
Speaker 1: leave because I was crying in the middle of night
Speaker 1: because because I always working to Freddy Krueger. You know,
Speaker 1: have they sent me to a boot camp and crying
Speaker 1: about Freddy Krueger. Yeah, I was like I was like
Speaker 1: eight or something. I was like crying and my mom
Speaker 1: had to come get me at like two in the morning.
Speaker 1: I couldn't sleep through the night. She had a drunk
Speaker 1: drive over there. Yeah, well she yeah, she she picked
Speaker 1: me up on her bike, a bicycle and dragged me
Speaker 1: home on pegs. But yeah, one time I got I
Speaker 1: was a sleepover. Did you face conferences for that at school?
Speaker 1: Did people make fun of you? Do you remember anyone
Speaker 1: making fun of you for that? I don't think the
Speaker 1: kid went to my school. I think he was on
Speaker 1: my team. And no, I never faced concert not that
Speaker 1: I know of. I'm sure they probably talk you. Parents
Speaker 1: probably changed schools for you. They're like, we don't want
Speaker 1: you to have to do with the fallout from this.
Speaker 1: We're going to switch school, send you away to a
Speaker 1: Remember one time we were billow fighting me and my friends,
Speaker 1: and I fell back. I hit my head on the
Speaker 1: corner of the fire h like a fire pit or
Speaker 1: like whatever what is it called fireplace? Fireplace, and I
Speaker 1: cracked my head open, gushing blood and I'm just running
Speaker 1: around with blood coming down, going you did it? Now?
Speaker 1: You didn't. Now, that's a hilarious thing that we saying.
Speaker 1: I don't even know what it means. It sounds like
Speaker 1: something your mom was sometimes something you got from a mom.
Speaker 1: Oh well you did it now, Like you know how
Speaker 1: like kids to kind of pick up things that they're
Speaker 1: at saying, like there's that one little girl that goes, well,
Speaker 1: if the monster shows up, I'm gonna I'm gonna be like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing to here? Rassle? But there's a
Speaker 1: little girl that's like my rogue asshole and it's like,
Speaker 1: oh you know that girl, here's her dad dog like that.
Speaker 1: Um No, I I went the bed. Uh And I
Speaker 1: just pretended like I blacked it out because it was
Speaker 1: so traumatic. I went the bed in. Um. I was
Speaker 1: a bedwinter until fourth grade. But third grade I went
Speaker 1: to bed at Molly Colier's and Ellie Bog and Molly
Speaker 1: were there and m Monday morning at school there was
Speaker 1: show and tell, and Molly didn't have anything to show,
Speaker 1: so she raised her hand and told the whole I'm
Speaker 1: not joking, you raised her hand. And this was at
Speaker 1: a point in my life where I would go to
Speaker 1: the nurse every day because I was just so scared
Speaker 1: of I was like a dork and no one liked me,
Speaker 1: and so I'd go to the nurse every day and
Speaker 1: just be sick so I could go home. And I
Speaker 1: thought about running away from school multiple times. Like I
Speaker 1: just like hated be I hate. I was just like
Speaker 1: had no friends and like with such a dork and like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I just hated it. And Molly was like my first friend.
Speaker 1: And then Ellie became her friend. And Ellie was like, uh,
Speaker 1: supreme bully and uh. And I went the bed and
Speaker 1: either Molly or Ellie shared with the class that Nikki
Speaker 1: Glazer Nikki what the bed at um? I think it
Speaker 1: was Ellie. She was like Nicky with the bed at
Speaker 1: Molly's house. On went on Friday night, and I'm not joking,
Speaker 1: you would We had a substitute teacher that day. I
Speaker 1: went over to his desk and said, I have to go.
Speaker 1: I was like after Show and Tell. I think she
Speaker 1: got yelled at for sharing it everyone. Like I think
Speaker 1: I blacked out because I don't remember the response because
Speaker 1: it must have been terrible. And I walked over to
Speaker 1: the desk and I remember saying, um, you know, I
Speaker 1: waited long enough that it didn't seem connected, but I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't feel good. Can I go to
Speaker 1: the nurse? And I remember the substitut teacher was like
Speaker 1: a like a boy, he was probably in his twenties,
Speaker 1: and he just goes he I remember him knowing that
Speaker 1: he knew I was lying, but that he was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: get out of here, kid, and like it was just
Speaker 1: like I know what you're running from right now. And
Speaker 1: I remember being so embarrassed that he knew and like
Speaker 1: almost literally had almost written it already for me and
Speaker 1: was like I was just waiting for you to come
Speaker 1: up here and get out of here. And I went
Speaker 1: to the nurse and just like you know, cried and
Speaker 1: then my mom got a call from the counselor. In
Speaker 1: fourth grade, Um, I had suffered with like the embarrassment
Speaker 1: of that all through third grade into fourth grade and
Speaker 1: Molly and I had no friends. I almost going to
Speaker 1: cry because it was like the worst time. That's when
Speaker 1: I met Kristen was fourth grade, thank god, because I
Speaker 1: had no friends. But I remember Mrs Pole was our
Speaker 1: counselor at our school. She would always come in with
Speaker 1: like a puppet dragon to talk about about the dangers
Speaker 1: of smoking or whatever. I don't know, like that's probably
Speaker 1: too young for that on your hand, what I just
Speaker 1: feel like that might be a thing from what keep going.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't even know what. I just wonder
Speaker 1: what you were doing just that and who wrote that
Speaker 1: for you? So so then so she walked in. I
Speaker 1: don't even know what you said, division, I'm not getting
Speaker 1: your train of thought at all. So she walked in.
Speaker 1: I remember my fourth grade class. This is months and months,
Speaker 1: I mean it's the whole school year after that incident.
Speaker 1: She walks into my class, and I all I want
Speaker 1: is to be invisible. I don't ever want anyone to
Speaker 1: single me out, you know, being in trouble or being
Speaker 1: singled as like the worst um thing I could imagine
Speaker 1: are being on the show singled out and so um,
Speaker 1: she walked in my class like disrupted Mrs Heatherington's lesson.
Speaker 1: You know, she popped in you know, when the door opens,
Speaker 1: everyone the class turns is like Someone's at the door,
Speaker 1: and Miss Heatherington's like, yes, Mrs Bowl and she was like, hey,
Speaker 1: can I see Nicky Glazer? And I remember just being
Speaker 1: like what the fund could this be? I've never been
Speaker 1: like singled at. She was like, can I see Nicky Glazer?
Speaker 1: Only Miss bull only grabbed kids that were like come
Speaker 1: from divorced families and those kids get to like come
Speaker 1: and go to this special class. She called called me
Speaker 1: to her office and she was like, is anything going
Speaker 1: on in your life that you want to talk about?
Speaker 1: And I was just like no, and she was like
Speaker 1: are you sure. I was just like no, and I
Speaker 1: was just freaked out. I felt like I was I
Speaker 1: don't know what I did. And she was like, maybe
Speaker 1: something that happened at Molly's house and I was just
Speaker 1: like what. This was a year later, like the next
Speaker 1: school year, and I was just like no, and she
Speaker 1: was like, maybe you wet the bet And I was
Speaker 1: just like, how does this woman know? This woman? I mean,
Speaker 1: at the time, I think she was cold. I thought
Speaker 1: she was cold calling parents, trying to drudge up business,
Speaker 1: being like does your kid have any developmental issues that
Speaker 1: they that I can maybe talk to them about. But
Speaker 1: what I now think is that I was just so
Speaker 1: fucked up and I was obviously something was happening with
Speaker 1: me that Mrs Heatherington had told Mrs Pole like like,
Speaker 1: call Nikki's mom and figure out what's going on. And
Speaker 1: my mom ratted me out and said, Nikki, what the
Speaker 1: bet at Molly Colliers and is being bullied for it?
Speaker 1: And so my mom. I remember never trusting my mom
Speaker 1: again because she had told Mrs Poel my secret that
Speaker 1: she wouldn't have known, and it was humiliating and became
Speaker 1: the issue. It was just awful. So you have to
Speaker 1: go into class though like you were, you would think
Speaker 1: you would think about what I remember wedding I was.
Speaker 1: It was the first time I thought I have to
Speaker 1: kill me. I don't want to cry. It was like
Speaker 1: the like to be in fourth grade and think you
Speaker 1: want to kill yourself. Um. I did not expect to cry,
Speaker 1: just out because I just realized, like that was like,
Speaker 1: that's so sad for like an eight year old, Like
Speaker 1: I think that they're gonna have Like I just remember
Speaker 1: being like, I'm gonna have to kill myself one day
Speaker 1: because if if anyone ever, like if anyone else, if
Speaker 1: this keeps following me, or like I just actually I
Speaker 1: just knew that I would have to like that that
Speaker 1: it was. I'm so glad more people didn't find out,
Speaker 1: because I would, like I was that you to, But
Speaker 1: I just remember, for some reason, I remember the moment
Speaker 1: I realized I was gonna have to kill myself when
Speaker 1: I was in fourth grade. I was like I was
Speaker 1: staring at a blinking VCR for some reason, it was
Speaker 1: probably like the spot at least staring at a blinking
Speaker 1: I just remember a blinking twelve o'clock, you know, when
Speaker 1: it's like reaset. It was like late at night at
Speaker 1: my cousin's house, and I was like, I can't believe
Speaker 1: I have to kill myself, Like I don't I want
Speaker 1: to like keep living, but I can't if this. And
Speaker 1: it was like, um, I think I was like scared
Speaker 1: it was gonna get out a little bit more or
Speaker 1: something like there was something that was happening like on Monday,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna find out if everyone knows or no one knows,
Speaker 1: And it was like and and then it just became
Speaker 1: so beautifully ironic that like now I make my living
Speaker 1: off of saying like the most embarrassing things, like I
Speaker 1: remember thinking like if anyone finds out, I'll die, I will.
Speaker 1: I didn't really know how I was going to do it,
Speaker 1: but I just remember being like, I don't want to die,
Speaker 1: but I like have to. And that just made me
Speaker 1: cry because I just realized how fucking set like if
Speaker 1: if I have read an eight year old who wanted
Speaker 1: to kill themselves, Like how awful like for a child
Speaker 1: to feel that way? Like I don't think until this moment,
Speaker 1: I realized that that thought had crossed my mind at
Speaker 1: such a young age, and it just makes me very
Speaker 1: sad for like my young self. So I'm sorry crying.
Speaker 1: Let's get to why do I care? Oh, we're gonna
Speaker 1: go to break break quick. That's gonna do it? A
Speaker 1: chair gears Andrew's weekly sports moment. All right, pants you ready?
Speaker 1: It's peep bad? I didn't pants on? Why that a sleepover?
Speaker 1: Probably Italian dad there. I probably had a little like, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, ninety downing. Okay, we have to go, come on, okay.
Speaker 1: Becky Hammon, who will be entering the A season as
Speaker 1: an assistant coach in the NBA, is considered to be
Speaker 1: one of the top coaching candidates, and she doesn't want
Speaker 1: an NBA team to check a box and hiring her
Speaker 1: as a head coach, so she might be up or
Speaker 1: she is up for a head coaching role, first woman
Speaker 1: head coach ever in the NBA. Yeah, And she just
Speaker 1: made a big statement about like, I don't want to
Speaker 1: be hired because I'm a woman I wanted. I don't
Speaker 1: want it to be that be the headline for the
Speaker 1: rest of my life. I just want to be a
Speaker 1: person that gets a job because I'm qualified for it,
Speaker 1: which is so annoying that she even has to make
Speaker 1: a statement like that. But I mean, I think it's
Speaker 1: important to make a statement like that. But I I
Speaker 1: really care about this because I relate to this as
Speaker 1: like someone who constantly gets a question of being a
Speaker 1: female in comedy, being a male dominated profession. What's it
Speaker 1: like to be a woman? There's your next Comedians of lady.
Speaker 1: You know, I don't get any more because I'm famous
Speaker 1: enough that I have a name for myself, But so
Speaker 1: often you your whole identity as being a woman in
Speaker 1: stand up and I just never thought of myself as
Speaker 1: a woman, and I just didn't think I was different
Speaker 1: than the guys I compared myself to men um so
Speaker 1: I kind of get that of being like, wait, why
Speaker 1: do I so? I'm I'm like held to a less
Speaker 1: a small like the bar isn't as high for me,
Speaker 1: and like if I'm even as good as men, people
Speaker 1: are like, whoa, she's really good, Like I want to
Speaker 1: be as good as Chappelle, not like whatever. But the
Speaker 1: thing is, there's not really like any women. Chapelle's all
Speaker 1: the best of all, the one all the men who
Speaker 1: are the kings of stand up and the ones that
Speaker 1: we go are like the legends. Uh. Joan Rivers is
Speaker 1: the only female stand up that like even gets close
Speaker 1: to that. I mean, you could say Ellen, but she's
Speaker 1: more of a talk show host now and and no
Speaker 1: one's really like they don't put her up there with
Speaker 1: Carlin prior Chappelle, Rock Seinfeld. I mean, the list goes
Speaker 1: on and on. For male stand ups, there's not we
Speaker 1: will give credit to female stand ups for sure, and
Speaker 1: there's some that you know, have big names, but not
Speaker 1: like that. Yeah, I mean I think like she isn't
Speaker 1: a sport too. I think there's certain sports, like if
Speaker 1: a head coach was in the NFL was a woman,
Speaker 1: it would be uh, even more surprising because most women,
Speaker 1: you know, don't actually play football, women play basketball, Women
Speaker 1: understand basketball could demand men man game. The men game
Speaker 1: be a little different because you know, they dunk more
Speaker 1: and ship like that. But she has a great understanding
Speaker 1: of it. And there's plenty of male coaches in the
Speaker 1: NBA that never played in the NBA that probably did.
Speaker 1: You haven't play as much as her. Okay, let me
Speaker 1: just this is the end of discussion. It's it's just
Speaker 1: reiterating your point. I used to watch female gymnastics, and
Speaker 1: I used to think Bella Caroli, What a funk is
Speaker 1: this old fat Russian man screaming at this little girl
Speaker 1: about how she didn't land it right? You couldn't walk
Speaker 1: a straight line if your life depended on it, you
Speaker 1: old booze bag? How dare you tell a woman how
Speaker 1: to flip and and and admonish her for not He
Speaker 1: couldn't Did he ever flip? Though? That's only as a kid,
Speaker 1: Like he wasn't a gymnast. That would be my argument
Speaker 1: is that at one point he was a gym My
Speaker 1: point is is like at one point she you know,
Speaker 1: these people never even played football. But I see what
Speaker 1: you're saying. I see what you're saying. Did this woman
Speaker 1: play basketball? Yes? Yes, I don't know her like history,
Speaker 1: but I'm almost a thousand percent she played a ton
Speaker 1: of basketball. Coaching does not require you to be a man,
Speaker 1: but for some reason we we think it does. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: when you think coach, I mean unless it's of a
Speaker 1: female league, you you would never hear coach and think, well,
Speaker 1: and how are these big men listening to a little
Speaker 1: girl like that's like good? I would never be able
Speaker 1: to listen to her. I mean, it's just misogyny and
Speaker 1: runs so fucking deep, and I know it's not most
Speaker 1: men um and I don't like and they can't help it.
Speaker 1: They can't help it. It's just the way she gets
Speaker 1: the job. And even a woman can be lasting. Let's
Speaker 1: get the fan trax fan Trax Mega. Yes, alright, fan Trax,
Speaker 1: Let's do it. This is uh the listener mail messages
Speaker 1: voice mail from from our besties? Uh what what? Who
Speaker 1: are we starting with? Noah? Let's go with Emily. All right,
Speaker 1: Emily voice memo, Hi, no Jerkie. I'm Emily from Sacramento.
Speaker 1: I'm a longtime listener and fan of you guys. Um, So,
Speaker 1: I just finished listening to the podcast called A Kangaroo
Speaker 1: Stampede of Emotions. I've been traveling for the last full
Speaker 1: of weeks, so I wasn't able to listen to the
Speaker 1: podcast very much, and I'm so glad I tuned back
Speaker 1: and for this one, I laughed a lot and then
Speaker 1: I cried and it was really beautiful. Like you, NICKI,
Speaker 1: I struggle with perfection and feeling like I'm not good enough,
Speaker 1: so I just appreciate you in the message you shared
Speaker 1: on the pod. I can't wait to see you guys
Speaker 1: in San Francisco in December. I promise you could never
Speaker 1: disappoint me. Also a quick story I wanted to share.
Speaker 1: My boyfriend was picking something on his back yesterday and
Speaker 1: asked me to take a look at it. It was
Speaker 1: a war and the first thing I said when I
Speaker 1: saw it was, you know who would love to pick
Speaker 1: up that nicky glazer? Alright, all the swells guys. Love
Speaker 1: you guys so much. I I love you so much.
Speaker 1: Thank you concise beautiful message. You know you can tell
Speaker 1: she wrote out the first part and was like reading it,
Speaker 1: I appreciate the effort that goes into like being like
Speaker 1: I don't want to just like I don't want to ramble,
Speaker 1: I might perfection And yeah, it's so sweet that little cuty.
Speaker 1: I wonder what she wrote it on, like her notes
Speaker 1: and her phone or like if she wrote it by hand.
Speaker 1: That is so nice. Um, thank you for thank you
Speaker 1: for relating to that perfectionism and um that episode in
Speaker 1: which I had a lot of emotions and um and
Speaker 1: and and today you've heard them too. They're they're coming
Speaker 1: out a little uh like fits. I like I I
Speaker 1: told you yesterday, I feel like a clenched fist, Like
Speaker 1: I feel so much anxiety recently, not anxiety, but just
Speaker 1: like I just am so print up and I think
Speaker 1: it's just getting Sometimes it just sneaks out and I
Speaker 1: can't help it. It's like, uh like P when well,
Speaker 1: when you're sleeping in third grade or when you're like
Speaker 1: a yeah, when you're like a you know, an older
Speaker 1: woman and you like laugh and you pee and you
Speaker 1: start wearing like diapers. I think maybe it's not a
Speaker 1: woman thing, but I just know that most of people
Speaker 1: I talked to our women that like start leaking P
Speaker 1: when they laugh. I don't know. That's how I feel
Speaker 1: about crying now, it's just like God, why it's like
Speaker 1: it's out of nowhere, like it's the sun is shining,
Speaker 1: and like you're like, is it raining? And then it's
Speaker 1: bird ship. Yeah. So thank you. That was a that
Speaker 1: was a lovely note and it really made me feel
Speaker 1: great when you said there's no way you could be
Speaker 1: disappointed me. That like really puts the pressure off. Thank you, Jack, Hey, besties,
Speaker 1: Jack from Kansas City here. I just listened to the
Speaker 1: episode that came out today, it's like the fourth of
Speaker 1: August or something where we got into the little spiraling
Speaker 1: Reddit post situation UM, and just felt compelled to leave
Speaker 1: this voice memo. I just wanted to say that I
Speaker 1: feel like for every person that has like those thoughts
Speaker 1: or makes those posts, there's even more people who just
Speaker 1: find it relatable. Myself included. Sometimes I find myself questioning
Speaker 1: myself that didn't sound right. Why I relate to this
Speaker 1: podcast and much being at twenty three year old white
Speaker 1: straight man. I don't really know why all of that
Speaker 1: makes a difference, but either way, I find it very
Speaker 1: relatable and enjoyable. UM, and I loved what you said
Speaker 1: a couple I don't know if it was weeks or
Speaker 1: episodes ago about how this is what you want to
Speaker 1: do forever, so buckle up for the long haul. I
Speaker 1: just love that. I'm excited for that. And then I
Speaker 1: also figured, while I'm here, I would give you probably
Speaker 1: my worst mispronunciation of all time. Uh. In college, I
Speaker 1: got invited to a scholarship banquet and I was reading
Speaker 1: out the agenda to a group of friends and the
Speaker 1: first thing on the agenda was at whatever time, um,
Speaker 1: I said that they were starting with horrors divorce, which
Speaker 1: was which was just orders. Why is that whores do divorce?
Speaker 1: You know, because they're just horrors and they can't stop fucking,
Speaker 1: I can't keep a relationship. Um. So funny. Every time
Speaker 1: I think of Mors, I just think of those eggs
Speaker 1: with the dogs. Yeah, those are white trash. I feel
Speaker 1: like they could be a white trash order. But they're
Speaker 1: also in like like really nice functions. Or maybe I'm
Speaker 1: white trash, and I think that makes function classies. You know,
Speaker 1: when it's classy. They put a little that red pepper
Speaker 1: I think, or paprika that might be described things and
Speaker 1: you get you're like, oh, yes, but that's funnier to say.
Speaker 1: It's like red, red colored dust or whatever you said. Um,
Speaker 1: thank you so much. That is uh. First of all,
Speaker 1: you should have written it down first before, I mean
Speaker 1: a little little ram. I'm just kidding. No, I loved it.
Speaker 1: I don't require anyone. Please do not think that you
Speaker 1: have to. I like, I like both versions. Whatever works
Speaker 1: for you. Jack Um. Thank you so much for relating
Speaker 1: to the show and for also saying that, UM, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, I I guess I don't know, you know,
Speaker 1: like you read one bad comment and you forget all
Speaker 1: the good things and um and yeah, and I assume
Speaker 1: that people I like when my U, the people that
Speaker 1: I enjoyed enjoy watching our show me their flaws and
Speaker 1: show me there the worst side of their character, because
Speaker 1: I think that so much of me growing up and
Speaker 1: looking at people like that, I would idolize Jennifer Aniston's
Speaker 1: and Jennifer love Hewitts and like, you know, just like anyone,
Speaker 1: all the Jennifers, Jennifer Coolidge, Jennifer um Gray, um, everyone.
Speaker 1: You know, celebrities didn't have flaws until the past couple
Speaker 1: of years, Like it just became kind of in to
Speaker 1: show your flaws and like that's like a really an
Speaker 1: admirable thing when I grew up, like they all seemed perfect.
Speaker 1: There was never anything wrong with any of these people,
Speaker 1: and so I just I'm just doing I'm showing those
Speaker 1: sides of myself because I it makes me feel free.
Speaker 1: And it also I know that, um, someone out there
Speaker 1: that might put me on a pedestal, it's nice to
Speaker 1: knock me off it. So you just know that, Like
Speaker 1: the stars are just like yeah, just like but yeah,
Speaker 1: I uh, that's why tabloids were so big back in
Speaker 1: the day. It's like Jennifer Aniston eats a donut, you know.
Speaker 1: It's like that's why that ship was so big back then,
Speaker 1: the worst beach bodies. I fucking loved looking at people's
Speaker 1: cell like Celebrity Cellulite. Yeah, I would buy a magazine
Speaker 1: called Celebrity Cellulite back and like I would have bought that,
Speaker 1: like just to see their flaws. I was so hungry
Speaker 1: for these people to show me that they were like me,
Speaker 1: or that I could be them, or you know, it's
Speaker 1: just so nice when you hear people have flaws, they say, oh,
Speaker 1: we don't show our flaws or our personal life because
Speaker 1: you can't then separate that from the when you're watching
Speaker 1: a show or whatever. It's like I can know Jennifer
Speaker 1: Aniston has cellulite and still think she's great in the
Speaker 1: morning show, like, or I can know that she you know,
Speaker 1: fucking takes ships on Wednesdays on top of you know,
Speaker 1: dresser whatever. It is something that it wouldn't like I
Speaker 1: couldn't not separate it. We want them to be perfect
Speaker 1: even though they're playing roles, like we know they're being fake,
Speaker 1: like they're doing They're not themselves in the role they're playing,
Speaker 1: so why do we need to think that they're It's
Speaker 1: it is interesting, but there are sometimes though that you
Speaker 1: see a celebrity that you have put on a pestle
Speaker 1: and they are they do have like a human moment,
Speaker 1: like when Taylor Swift does something that like quote unquote
Speaker 1: disappoints me where I'm like, oh, I wish she was
Speaker 1: cooler about that. It's like I get mad because it's
Speaker 1: like I want her to be perfect. I want more.
Speaker 1: I expect more perfectionism from her than I would expect
Speaker 1: for myself. And it's just even though I love her,
Speaker 1: because she writes songs about not being perfect and having
Speaker 1: complex feelings, So I get caught on both sides of it.
Speaker 1: Still to this day, do we have any Do we
Speaker 1: have one more to take us into our final though?
Speaker 1: This one's from Nicole. Yeah, good name, Hey Niki, Andrew
Speaker 1: and Noah. For one second, this is the hottest voice
Speaker 1: I think we ever got. It's not hot, it's like
Speaker 1: it's it's a smr dude, it's soothing and shit. Wait,
Speaker 1: let's start it again. Everyone, Just like, get cozy with
Speaker 1: a cup of tea, mask on, don't hit your head
Speaker 1: on the back of the fireplace and scream oh now
Speaker 1: didn't now, um, but yeah, just get cozy next to fireplace,
Speaker 1: and let's take in Nicole's uh, soothing, soft spoken voice. Hey, Niki,
Speaker 1: Andrew and Noah. I know that you asked for more
Speaker 1: hay babe moment, so here is mine. Um. A couple
Speaker 1: of years ago, when I was at the hairdresser one time,
Speaker 1: I had to answer a phone call for some reason,
Speaker 1: and after I hung up, my hairdresser goes, you know,
Speaker 1: you would have a great phone sex voice, and I
Speaker 1: never went to him again. Thank oh my god, Well
Speaker 1: she'st I am so sorry to I am so we
Speaker 1: did not though we had no idea. And by the way,
Speaker 1: I want to I want to say, if you replay
Speaker 1: the tape, I did not say sexy. I said that
Speaker 1: to me. There was nothing sexy about voice. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: you could make so much money if you did, UM
Speaker 1: phone sex now SMR you you really could, I mean, girl,
Speaker 1: look into it. I would. I mean they do it. Yea.
Speaker 1: It definitely has been done. And some people think SMR
Speaker 1: sexual and it's not. I guess for some people do is.
Speaker 1: But yeah, no, that's a really inappropriate comment for um,
Speaker 1: you know, your favorite podcast co host or a hairdresser
Speaker 1: to make about your voice when you're just trying to
Speaker 1: answer your phone or be a good fan and leave
Speaker 1: a voice memo. You know, that was so funny, Nicole.
Speaker 1: I hope you laughed at that. And I love that
Speaker 1: there's only two people in the world listening to this,
Speaker 1: Noah and Nicole, who knew how I how ironic it
Speaker 1: was that we said that about her voice. But Nicole,
Speaker 1: I mean that voice is so good. It's so good.
Speaker 1: How do you walk around with a voice like that?
Speaker 1: I mean, like I would be putting myself to sleep
Speaker 1: all the time, like it's beautiful. It's I mean, I
Speaker 1: really got tingles in the back of my head in
Speaker 1: a way that I needed that after I cried before,
Speaker 1: Like I, that just felt so soothing, like a hug
Speaker 1: from my mom. Um. That not the mom that I have,
Speaker 1: because that feels weird. That would feel out of out
Speaker 1: of character for her to give me a comforting hug
Speaker 1: because she doesn't love me, but because it's just not
Speaker 1: in her nature. But um, that felt really good. That
Speaker 1: felt so Nicky. And hey, hey Nicki, wait, I wanted
Speaker 1: to even dry to Wait, Hey, hey new drinky, I
Speaker 1: can't even do it. It's like it's I don't have
Speaker 1: the capabilities to be that soothing. We have to go,
Speaker 1: I have to go catch up. Wait, let's do it again, Hey, Nicki,
Speaker 1: Andrew and Noah, I know that you asked for more
Speaker 1: bathe moment. Oh my god, Nicole, Okay, I am horny
Speaker 1: now you know. I take it. I take it back.
Speaker 1: I I actually I'm on board. I think, Um, I
Speaker 1: want to go to your hair styles because he has uh,
Speaker 1: he's he's got a good year. Yeah, nick let's end
Speaker 1: it with a SMR. Ready I'll go first, and then
Speaker 1: you ended. I don't go. You guys, thank you so
Speaker 1: much for listening to this weekend you have all the swells.
Speaker 1: Oh good, Hi guys, thank you for listening. That was
Speaker 1: me crumbling up a note from one of our besties
Speaker 1: that I was going to read but I forgot to,
Speaker 1: so shout out to Will Jones. Um, he said, give
Speaker 1: me a shout out on the pod. I read your
Speaker 1: note and thank you so much for sending it to
Speaker 1: me and writing it on the back of a random
Speaker 1: piece of paper. And um, I love you and thank
Speaker 1: you so much. We'll see you on Monday. Have a
Speaker 1: great weekend. Don't be Cat and shar