Speaker 1: Hell I Suck At Dating with Denglert and Dared Haven,
Speaker 1: and I heard radio podcast. Hey, welcome to an all
Speaker 1: new episode of help I Suck At Dating. I'm Jared
Speaker 1: Haven joined by Dean Anglert. Sorry I missed the last
Speaker 1: couple episodes. When we were recorded last week, I was
Speaker 1: doing a catering event on a boat for Audrey's. Ironically enough,
Speaker 1: it was the same boat that Ashley and I had
Speaker 1: for our welcome party all those years ago when we
Speaker 1: got married. So it was a little bit of a
Speaker 1: full circle moment because it was the same wedding planner, Troy,
Speaker 1: the same videographers lorev on the same boat, and then
Speaker 1: here I was. I wasn't the groom anymore. I was
Speaker 1: not the center of attention. I was the sandwich guy
Speaker 1: I was handing outside welcome party. I don't know, it's
Speaker 1: just like for like, because our wedding wasn't a destination
Speaker 1: because we live in Rhode Island, but it was a
Speaker 1: destination for you guys or for you know, we know
Speaker 1: a bunch of people across the country, so we wanted
Speaker 1: them when they got to Rhode Island. That was like
Speaker 1: a part of the wedding family. That doesn't live right now,
Speaker 1: and a little bit of like, hey, this is like
Speaker 1: the kickoff weekend Friday night. You know we're gonna do
Speaker 1: the boat. Uh, Dean was supposed to be on it.
Speaker 1: But then and then all of a sudden, I got
Speaker 1: a phone call. But you know what's so funny I
Speaker 1: was thinking about this is when you called me and
Speaker 1: you're like, hey, man, like my flight got rescheduled and
Speaker 1: I can't make it tonight. Like I'm not getting into
Speaker 1: a level blah blah blah. I can't believe I fell
Speaker 1: for it. I can't believe I was like, oh, his
Speaker 1: flight was rescheduled. They're canceled or delayed, instead of being
Speaker 1: like he obviously just missed it. But anyway, but wait
Speaker 1: a second, are you sure I wasn't there for that?
Speaker 1: Because I remember there was one thing where I wore
Speaker 1: this like white and tan striped shirt and then I
Speaker 1: showed up and the venue had a white and tan
Speaker 1: striped like canvas tent thing. Okay, that wasn't on a boat.
Speaker 1: Do you not remember not being on a boat? Was
Speaker 1: that much of a blur? Well, the rehearsal didn't was
Speaker 1: like on the water, and so I thought that I
Speaker 1: might have like stepped into a boat at some point
Speaker 1: and it just felt like it was still on the ground.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? Fair point? Fair point? Um,
Speaker 1: that is one of the full circle we missed you
Speaker 1: last week. I do have a lot of questions to
Speaker 1: ask you about your life over the past uh seven days,
Speaker 1: because it seems like you've been living your best one
Speaker 1: over the past week or so. But before we get
Speaker 1: into any of that stuff, I don't think you've introduced
Speaker 1: Piper yet. Who is our co host with us this week?
Speaker 1: Piper James. You know you love her from Bachelor in
Speaker 1: Paradise Season seven. I believe, man, there's getting to be
Speaker 1: a lot of those. Um, Piper, Hello, Hello, I'm so
Speaker 1: excited to be here. Yeah. I don't know what Bachelor's
Speaker 1: season like, Bachelor in Paradise season, I don't know what
Speaker 1: year it is, but I'm happy to be here. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be crazy in like twenty years when it's like
Speaker 1: Baschel in Paradise season and you're like, wait what, Um,
Speaker 1: But welcome to the podcast. We're happy to have you.
Speaker 1: You are living in New York, right and I figured
Speaker 1: that's where you got to be right now. You got
Speaker 1: some nice art on the walls back there. But what's
Speaker 1: what's news since the last time we you? What's been
Speaker 1: going on in your life? Not much and then a
Speaker 1: little bit of everything. I mean, New York is crazy
Speaker 1: right now. So me and my roommates Serena Chew from
Speaker 1: The Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise, we've been looking for
Speaker 1: a new apartment. Let me tell you, it is impossible
Speaker 1: to find a place to live in New York. Like
Speaker 1: we will find a place put it put like our
Speaker 1: application and it's already gone by that afternoon. Like it's
Speaker 1: been wild. So pretty much trying to figure out how
Speaker 1: to live in New York, traveling a little bit, it's
Speaker 1: pretty much it. Well, let's walk through the what is
Speaker 1: it like to be a renter in New York? Because
Speaker 1: we just had to find a new place in Los
Speaker 1: Angeles and I'll tell you the same. It was not easy.
Speaker 1: Granted we found the first place we saw was the
Speaker 1: place we ended up getting, but that's just because Caitlin
Speaker 1: is super proactive about it. Um is it is it
Speaker 1: like as big of a pain in the butt as
Speaker 1: I'm sure it is, because like everyone wants to rent
Speaker 1: out there and everything gets snacked up, snatched up super quickly.
Speaker 1: Like what's like the main challenge. Yeah, I mean I've
Speaker 1: heard it's really similar to how l A is right now.
Speaker 1: It's mainly like you prices are ridiculous. Like our rent
Speaker 1: was we got it in COVID, so it was like,
Speaker 1: i'll just say it was, we have three bedroom they
Speaker 1: gave us our renewal. It was we were like, absolutely
Speaker 1: not not for this tiny little apartment. Like it's it's
Speaker 1: three bedrooms technically, but like their tiny bedrooms, Like we're like,
Speaker 1: we're out of here. So it's kind of just been
Speaker 1: a lot of that, like trying to find something that's
Speaker 1: like in our budget, but then also isn't ridiculously tiny,
Speaker 1: Like it's it's impossible and they do it. It's that
Speaker 1: it's the worst right now. It's terrible. Yeah, actually, and
Speaker 1: I are looking for new playing. Is that legal? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's well, there's like I know in New
Speaker 1: York and I think a lot of places there's laws
Speaker 1: about how much they can raise it. And I hit
Speaker 1: that that threshold. Yeah, there's only so much you can do. Uh.
Speaker 1: So you and Serena or roommates. So you guys were
Speaker 1: you guys both on the same season of The Bachelor.
Speaker 1: We were Yeah, oh okay, so I'm assuming you guys
Speaker 1: didn't know each other but became super close after the show. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: It's been so funny how like such so many friendships
Speaker 1: formed from the show, Like you're competing for the same guy.
Speaker 1: It's like supposed to be. You know, it is reality TV,
Speaker 1: and there's drama and you argue so many people, but
Speaker 1: then it's just like one big family afterwards, and people
Speaker 1: live together, people have babies together. It's just crazy. How
Speaker 1: come you and Brendon I lived together because you are
Speaker 1: dating Brendan still right I am still dating Brendon. He's
Speaker 1: actually on his way to New York right now. He
Speaker 1: lives in Boston, like right outside of Boston, and that's
Speaker 1: where his work is is in the Boston area. Um,
Speaker 1: and I just love New York, so like I don't
Speaker 1: really want to move up there, and like I've said
Speaker 1: it like a few times before on like social media,
Speaker 1: but I kind of love long distance, especially being like
Speaker 1: fresh to New York. I love just like having that
Speaker 1: independence to do what I want in the city and
Speaker 1: then like we'll see each other traveled together so there's
Speaker 1: like so that prolonged honey neon period to our relationship,
Speaker 1: which is definitely super neat for for someone that doesn't
Speaker 1: know the area super well. How far apart are New
Speaker 1: York City and Boston, that's got to be a quick
Speaker 1: trainer at right, it's like a three and a half
Speaker 1: for our trainer, depending on the line, or it's like
Speaker 1: a forty five minute flight, so door to door, it's
Speaker 1: about the same if you take the train versus flying,
Speaker 1: but I honestly prefer flying. It's a little bit cheaper.
Speaker 1: That's not bad. And how let's talk about you and
Speaker 1: him a little bit. How are you guys doing. What's
Speaker 1: been going on with you? Guys? We're good. We're yeah,
Speaker 1: figuring it out. We're kind of like hitting our stride.
Speaker 1: Is like the distance goes, and like what we do
Speaker 1: and how often we see each other, So we're in
Speaker 1: like a good group of a good place right now.
Speaker 1: How often do you see each other? It's like every
Speaker 1: two weeks at this point. I think the longest we've
Speaker 1: gone is like three weeks, and that was when I
Speaker 1: was back home in Oregon for the holidays, and that
Speaker 1: was definitely really tough. So like so like every two weeks,
Speaker 1: you're feeling like that's a good it's a good time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's like a good and like we face I mean,
Speaker 1: like I'm so annoying. I loved face time, so I'm
Speaker 1: basediving him like every night whether like so it's not
Speaker 1: so we're talking every day, but like seeing each other
Speaker 1: every week every two weeks. How the hell did you
Speaker 1: guys get back together? Because, like I guess I remember,
Speaker 1: you guys left the show together and then broke up
Speaker 1: if I remember correctly. After the show. No, there was
Speaker 1: rumors that we woke up. We never broke up, but
Speaker 1: it was kind of just like circulating and we were like, no,
Speaker 1: we're just not like actively posting together or anything like that. Um.
Speaker 1: And I know that Brendan was trying to kind of
Speaker 1: like take the heat off of me, so he was like,
Speaker 1: you know, say, like unfollowed me and was just kind
Speaker 1: of like direct all of your hatred or whatever towards
Speaker 1: him me. Um. And so like I think there was
Speaker 1: a period where people thought we broke up because we
Speaker 1: weren't being super public about our relationship, but we we've
Speaker 1: been together ever since the show. I could have swore
Speaker 1: that I saw maybe it was just a news article.
Speaker 1: I thought one of you posted something about, like our
Speaker 1: relationship came to an end. We tried. I obviously made
Speaker 1: that up in my head. So you guys ever broke up?
Speaker 1: You guys love Paradise together, and even through all the rumors,
Speaker 1: that was all fake? Yeah, all fake? Well, Jared, do
Speaker 1: you know how reliable of sources like US Weekly and
Speaker 1: all of them are. They're always spot on or help
Speaker 1: I suck at dating? Obviously we're very spot on? Did
Speaker 1: that's it? Why did I think that? Then? Then neither
Speaker 1: one of you guys posted anything about, like, you know,
Speaker 1: we tried, it didn't work out. What the hell am
Speaker 1: I thinking of? No? I mean we're also like sorry,
Speaker 1: if you can hear the sirens, k um, yeah, we
Speaker 1: I mean I don't think either of us are even
Speaker 1: like dramatic enough to be like guys. I think that
Speaker 1: it's come to a conclusion like that's not even like
Speaker 1: in our personality type. So yeah, that's that was not us.
Speaker 1: I've got to a question for you, Piper, So coming
Speaker 1: off of your season at Bachelor in Paradise, and I
Speaker 1: can only ask this question because Calein and I had
Speaker 1: a similar Ish experience. I wouldn't say it was the
Speaker 1: exact same, but it had some similarities. Um, a lot
Speaker 1: of like the negativity you received from people. Do you
Speaker 1: feel like it might have brought you guys closer or
Speaker 1: was it a bit of a hurdle to overcome sometimes? Um,
Speaker 1: I think it definitely brought us closer. I mean it
Speaker 1: was like, I'm like a very anxious person. I've talked
Speaker 1: about that a little bit, but you know, it's something
Speaker 1: that I don't try to lead with when I'm in
Speaker 1: a relationship, a new relationship with somebody, and he got
Speaker 1: to see like all sides of my anxiety and everything,
Speaker 1: which I do think was like that vulnerability did help.
Speaker 1: And then you know, it's kind of like your one
Speaker 1: person in the world that gets the experience because you're
Speaker 1: going together, So you havebfinitely have that. I'll tell you
Speaker 1: what when when Kim and I came off batchlor in Paradise, Uh,
Speaker 1: we were met with a little bit of negativity as well,
Speaker 1: and there were some moments that were pretty challenging, at
Speaker 1: least from my perspective. And I'm sure she would say
Speaker 1: the same. I just don't want to speak for her,
Speaker 1: but I do think like after it was all said
Speaker 1: and done, it did end up bringing us closer together because,
Speaker 1: like you were saying, yeah, it's like you're going through
Speaker 1: this with one other person and then you have like
Speaker 1: that like thing to co miserate about. I don't know,
Speaker 1: there's something to be said about it, and it's it's
Speaker 1: weird to think about, but it really does like kind
Speaker 1: of bond you a little bit more than just coming
Speaker 1: off and like having everything be perfectly fine and you know,
Speaker 1: I don't know, Yeah, yeah, you don't really have that
Speaker 1: honeymoon phase. It's kind of like that trauma bond and
Speaker 1: then you kind of get to the honeymoon phase later,
Speaker 1: so that it definitely fun. Yeah, Or you could have
Speaker 1: taken the Jared and Ashley route and just messed around
Speaker 1: for four years until eventually coming to atally just be
Speaker 1: friends for like two and a half years, guys, and
Speaker 1: then everything's gonna work out the end. I want to
Speaker 1: talk about Paradise as well, obviously going into it, because
Speaker 1: you guys were accused of pretty much planning everything, which
Speaker 1: one I want to say off the bat way, more
Speaker 1: people do than than than the audience knows. Like so
Speaker 1: many people especially now talk before the show and then
Speaker 1: go into it and then they're like like, Okay, I'll
Speaker 1: give I won't say who it is, but I know
Speaker 1: for a fact there was a couple. I'm I don't
Speaker 1: think they're together anymore. But point is, I know for
Speaker 1: a fact that there are people that have talked on
Speaker 1: the show, went on the show, lied about it, and
Speaker 1: it was never it was never brought up, never brought
Speaker 1: They're not together. What you can say who it is?
Speaker 1: I got it. Uh, well I'll think about it. Let
Speaker 1: me think about it first. But Piper, I want to
Speaker 1: talk to you about, like you and Brandon Brandon before
Speaker 1: the show, what was like your whole idea going into Paradise.
Speaker 1: What were your thoughts, Like, did you guys think it
Speaker 1: was gonna happen the way it happened? Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: to our dutchment need, neither one of us had seen
Speaker 1: Paradise um, so that friend like, there was no planning
Speaker 1: to be had because we didn't know really what we
Speaker 1: were walking into. I'd seen like clips of seasons because
Speaker 1: Chelsea Vaughan, who was also on the season, she's one
Speaker 1: of my best friends. She was like, Okay, this is
Speaker 1: kind of what it is, and I was like yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: and this is before I even thought I was going
Speaker 1: on at all. Um. But yeah, Brendon and I had
Speaker 1: hung out a few times, I mean, Jared to your point,
Speaker 1: like with other people that were on the show that
Speaker 1: we're on that season, Um, nobody also the other people
Speaker 1: were dating or anything like that. It was just we
Speaker 1: knew people from the show, as we all do. Um,
Speaker 1: and Brendon one on the show. He was there before
Speaker 1: I was. I left probably a week after he did
Speaker 1: to to fly to Paradise. There wasn't any planning. I
Speaker 1: think that if there was planning, things would have gone
Speaker 1: a little better for us. But I think that the
Speaker 1: whole issue was, like I was just being really honest
Speaker 1: about my feelings and maybe he wasn't being as honest
Speaker 1: on the beach, but I had no way of knowing
Speaker 1: that I walked in just as blind as everybody else. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so what was he thinking because he was the one
Speaker 1: that looked Now it's all coming back to me, poor Brendon,
Speaker 1: because uh, you know, he's a Boston guy, so I
Speaker 1: want to support the local guys. But he did not
Speaker 1: look at it, So like, yeah, what was his thoughts
Speaker 1: about why didn't he just be honest, but like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I met Piper, and I think she's coming down and
Speaker 1: I kind of want to, you know, hang out with her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I I honestly don't know what his thought
Speaker 1: process was there, And there's like I think that he thought.
Speaker 1: I think he thought he was doing what was best
Speaker 1: in terms of like, okay, because he didn't know. When
Speaker 1: he left for the show and I was still at home,
Speaker 1: he was like, I hope you come, but I had
Speaker 1: made up my mind for sure yet, So I think
Speaker 1: he was also trying to explore the relationships and having
Speaker 1: something in the back of his mind like Piper could
Speaker 1: be walking onto this beach any day now, um. And
Speaker 1: I think that there was obviously that hope that he
Speaker 1: would see me, and just as I was hopeful that
Speaker 1: I would get there, he wouldn't be like I'm leaving
Speaker 1: with somebody else and I'm engaged in whatever like that.
Speaker 1: That was obviously a fear of mine. But yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't I don't think that he was like a hundred
Speaker 1: percent sure that I was coming. Therefore, he was like,
Speaker 1: let me, let me explore what else is out there.
Speaker 1: And just to be clear for the listeners of this
Speaker 1: podcast out there. Everyone, as Jared kind of lived to,
Speaker 1: everyone kind of goes in with a plan, whether it
Speaker 1: be a plan for yourself or a plan with someone else,
Speaker 1: whatever it is. Everyone kind of goes in with like
Speaker 1: an idea of what they want to do, um, myself included.
Speaker 1: And I just I want to stress that the plans
Speaker 1: never go exactly as you drop them up in your head,
Speaker 1: whether it's for yourself, whether it's with someone else. I
Speaker 1: had so many like delusions of things that I was
Speaker 1: going to be doing and like like things I was
Speaker 1: gonna be wearing, and like literally not a single one
Speaker 1: of those things ever happened in any of the seasons
Speaker 1: of The Bachelor that I was ever on. UM. So
Speaker 1: it's like, I guess I want to like stress the
Speaker 1: point that, like even though you might have like an
Speaker 1: idea or a plan of what you're gonna do, it
Speaker 1: like never ends up coming to fruition, at least in
Speaker 1: my case, Like I never successfully pulled off one of
Speaker 1: my plans going into one of the shows, you know,
Speaker 1: for better or for worse. I guess, yeah, yeah, I
Speaker 1: think that that's such a good point. Like even like
Speaker 1: thinking back to the Bachelor, I had a plan of
Speaker 1: even the dress I wanted to night one, and that
Speaker 1: it was completely out of my control. So it's like
Speaker 1: you don't know what you're walking into at any point time. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And that's kind of what I'm saying to Like, I
Speaker 1: had outfits where I was like, well, I'm gonna wear
Speaker 1: this and it's gonna be a big statement, and then
Speaker 1: I like never end up wearing it. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: why why did I think this is such a good
Speaker 1: idea going down there? And I'm not even talking about
Speaker 1: like big plans, Like it could be any size. It
Speaker 1: could be small as like an outfre as big as
Speaker 1: you know, something, whatever it might be. I guess all
Speaker 1: I'm saying is you never really know what you're gonna
Speaker 1: do or how you're gonna act until you're down there
Speaker 1: and it's actually happening, you know. Oh, totally like I
Speaker 1: think for a Bachelor rat. For me, I didn't have plans.
Speaker 1: It was more of like I went in. I mean,
Speaker 1: I wanted to make it far obviously, I didn't want
Speaker 1: to get eliminated night won, but I set my bar
Speaker 1: like really low. I had very low expectations. I didn't
Speaker 1: bring that many clothes, like I didn't want to you
Speaker 1: know how you know, how you put things into the universe.
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't want to put bad ju
Speaker 1: ju in the universe. I just want to like not
Speaker 1: plan for anything and just go in and whatever the
Speaker 1: hell happens happens. And then obviously I look back and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I wish I just brought more clothes. I
Speaker 1: looked like a stooge, Like I wish I'd cleaned myself
Speaker 1: up more. I wish I brought more clothes, especially with
Speaker 1: a hanging around with other guys like you know, who
Speaker 1: are so well dressed and everything fits so perfectly, and
Speaker 1: they're you know, I'm like, god, damn it, I really
Speaker 1: screwed this one up. For yeah, for Bachelor, And I
Speaker 1: told one of my best girlfriends that I was going
Speaker 1: on the bachel Threat and uh, I was like, but Natalie, like,
Speaker 1: I don't have any clothes. I don't know what to wear.
Speaker 1: And she goes like, oh, just wear your regular clothes. Uh,
Speaker 1: You'll be fine. And I was like watching. I watched
Speaker 1: like two episodes before I went, and I was like, man,
Speaker 1: these guys all look so dapper and and composed, and
Speaker 1: here I am shrown up in like T shirts and sneakers,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I'm not gonna fit it at all.
Speaker 1: But then watching it back, I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I My outfits did hold they hold their own against
Speaker 1: the people that I was going on dates with Rachel,
Speaker 1: like against if you know what I'm saying. And then
Speaker 1: when I went to Paradise, I showed up and all
Speaker 1: I had was swim trunks and tank tops basically. And
Speaker 1: I get there and they're like, so you got like
Speaker 1: your Rostary money outfits and I was like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna wear trunks and you know, a T shirt.
Speaker 1: And they're like, no, no, no, no, we have to
Speaker 1: go to the They took me to like the gift
Speaker 1: shop at the hotel and I had to buy like
Speaker 1: three pairs of pants, and so I don't know. It's
Speaker 1: like I'm saying, it's it's all a plan up here
Speaker 1: until you get there and I realize it's never gonna
Speaker 1: actually happen that way. Um, but that's not you're here
Speaker 1: nor there. Um. Back to Piper. Back to Piper, Piper
Speaker 1: coming off the show, did you guys, uh, didn't you
Speaker 1: guys go on like a trip somewhere? Did you guys,
Speaker 1: go to like Coasta, Rica or something after the show. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we went to We've been a few places. We went
Speaker 1: to a Ruba for Brendon's birthday November. How is it
Speaker 1: traveling together? Do you guys travel well together? Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: And that's like a huge thing for me because I
Speaker 1: love travel, Like if you ask me my hobby, I'm
Speaker 1: like traveling like whatever that entails. Um, So yeah, we
Speaker 1: travel super well together, especially like car rides because I
Speaker 1: hate being in the car and like living in New York,
Speaker 1: I don't drive. So we have like a good groove
Speaker 1: road tripping places and flying. So that's been good. Yeah,
Speaker 1: super important to be able to travel with your partner. Um,
Speaker 1: what is your like what is your guys biggest uh?
Speaker 1: Like argument always about you know, like some couples have
Speaker 1: like the little things that they get under each other's
Speaker 1: skin about do you guys like have that? Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: so funny because we since we started, when we came
Speaker 1: up the show started officially dating, Um, we've had the
Speaker 1: same argument probably a hundred and fifty times about going
Speaker 1: to the gym. Like we for whatever reason, we cannot
Speaker 1: get on the same page about like when one person
Speaker 1: wants to go to the gym, Like I'm a morning
Speaker 1: gym person and Brandon in like a strictly afterwork person. Um,
Speaker 1: and sometimes like all go at noon to break up
Speaker 1: my work day. And so whenever he comes to New
Speaker 1: York or whenever I go to Boston, we cannot figure
Speaker 1: it out. And for whatever reason, it is constant pickering
Speaker 1: in our relationship, and it's always like, let's figure out,
Speaker 1: Like right now, when he's driving to New York, He's like,
Speaker 1: I'm going to go to the gym before I drive,
Speaker 1: so we don't have to have the fight when I
Speaker 1: get to New York. We're going to the gym or not. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but that's good. If that's your biggest fight, that's a
Speaker 1: good good sign. I would say, yeah, that's like our
Speaker 1: our most consistent Obviously everybody has situational fight. But yeah,
Speaker 1: and for the record, I uh, well, I guess I
Speaker 1: don't know. I'm I'm I'm in different on either one.
Speaker 1: I like mornings are good if I can motivate myself
Speaker 1: to get to the gym, but I just like to
Speaker 1: go when it's not going to be busy, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like you go at like six pm
Speaker 1: and you're screwed because every machine or every place is taken,
Speaker 1: So I kind of I'm kind of on your side
Speaker 1: when it comes to that. Sorry, I was just looking
Speaker 1: up because I'm so sorry. I'm still stuck on the
Speaker 1: I can't believe that you guys didn't break up. That's
Speaker 1: because I was just looking up. I'm like, where did
Speaker 1: I see this? And there was an US Weekly article
Speaker 1: that said US confirmed that you guys broke up, but
Speaker 1: then you were on People like a month later saying
Speaker 1: that you guys are working through things and that you
Speaker 1: guys didn't break up. Yeah, that was like the whole
Speaker 1: conversation of like, and I went on one of the
Speaker 1: Bachelor podcasts and talking to Beta and she was like,
Speaker 1: did you guys break up? And I'm like, no, that
Speaker 1: was a rumor. Like you literally can't believe everything you read.
Speaker 1: Um and like one of the publications that wrote something
Speaker 1: about like us breaking up email me and I was like,
Speaker 1: we're so sorry, we got this wrong. And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: you never asked me, so that's why you got it wrong.
Speaker 1: We had a remember when Caitlin and I were just
Speaker 1: starting dating, and I think it was in Paradise was
Speaker 1: still airing or maybe like right after it just finished
Speaker 1: and uh, this girl that works at the News that
Speaker 1: I know texted me and she said, hey, I'm running
Speaker 1: this article about you and Kaylin, about how rocky your
Speaker 1: relationship is right now. And I was like sitting right
Speaker 1: next to Kalin in the car and I looked over
Speaker 1: her at Kalen. I was like, heys, our relationship rocky
Speaker 1: right now? And she goes, no, what are you talking about.
Speaker 1: Eything's perfect, and I go, yeah, that's what I thought. Um,
Speaker 1: for some reason, E News is running an article about
Speaker 1: how uh turmoil or tumultuous our relationship is right now.
Speaker 1: I was like, this is the dumbest thing in the world,
Speaker 1: right little whatever they want without confirming anything. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: people eat it up and be like. I mean, I
Speaker 1: was getting like hate messages or like mean comments or
Speaker 1: people being like I'm so sorry you guys broke up,
Speaker 1: and I was like, did we work up of a breakup? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's so weird. I mean, first of all, whoever rights
Speaker 1: hate messages needs to relax, Like there's no purpose in
Speaker 1: sending messages like that to someone that you don't know. Listen,
Speaker 1: of course, it's a TV show. You're supposed to get angry,
Speaker 1: you're supposed to get piste off. While you're watching it,
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, that person sucks with that person is great,
Speaker 1: Like I get it. You know how many times people
Speaker 1: have probably saw me on TV and be like that
Speaker 1: guy is the worst. But it's just like a part
Speaker 1: of the show. That's what happens. We put ourselves on TV.
Speaker 1: But the act of writing it, I always say, like,
Speaker 1: you can talk about people, like it's not good to
Speaker 1: talk about people behind their back, but like you would
Speaker 1: never go up to someone and be like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I hate you and like and so like, don't write it.
Speaker 1: Don't write to someone I hate you. And I wanted
Speaker 1: to ask you about that because you know, now it's
Speaker 1: all coming back to me about Paradise, and I remember
Speaker 1: two questions. One have you spoken to Natasha since the show?
Speaker 1: And then secondly, it's so weird because yes, I don't
Speaker 1: condone what Brandon did. I remember now what Brendan what
Speaker 1: was coming back to me. But it's so tough because one,
Speaker 1: I'm way like I believe in forgiveness and learning and
Speaker 1: in maturing, but I also what I don't believe in
Speaker 1: is like I feel like people go so overboard. Then
Speaker 1: that's the hate messages. You can say like, hey, like
Speaker 1: I don't agree with what he did, but like you
Speaker 1: take it to such an extreme when you message people
Speaker 1: and be like I hate you. That makes sense. Yeah, no, absolutely, Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I haven't spoken a Tuna Tosh. I've reached out several
Speaker 1: times in different forms. Um, I've seen her in person,
Speaker 1: like from a distance, but like her body language made
Speaker 1: it very clear that she didn't want to talk to me,
Speaker 1: which is absolutely fine. Um, but yeah, I've reached I've
Speaker 1: talked to her in the sense that I've reached out,
Speaker 1: but I haven't received a response. I know. Same for Brendan. Um,
Speaker 1: I have her number. Brendon doesn't remember, so he deemed her.
Speaker 1: But it was also kind of like in the midst
Speaker 1: of everything going on, so who knows, it could have
Speaker 1: got lost in the DMS. You never know, So we
Speaker 1: both tried to reach out. I haven't got a response,
Speaker 1: but yeah, no. I I also don't condone friend and did.
Speaker 1: Brandan's not proud of what he did. That's that's kind
Speaker 1: of is what it is. And I think that he's
Speaker 1: established his peace on that and I've established my peace.
Speaker 1: We both apologized. UM. I talked about how I wanted
Speaker 1: to apologize to Natasha personally, but if she wasn't open
Speaker 1: to hearing that, then I'm not going to push the subject.
Speaker 1: And if she doesn't want to talk about it, that's
Speaker 1: absolutely fine. UM. Yeah, I don't think that there's any
Speaker 1: situation in which anybody's feeling should be hurt. And I
Speaker 1: understand it watching something on TV, for for anybody, for
Speaker 1: any viewer, could bring up feelings of something that's happened
Speaker 1: to you. UM, and I apologize for that if my
Speaker 1: behavior led to anyone feeling any type of way after
Speaker 1: watching on TV. But I yeah, I never think that
Speaker 1: I hate comment is warranted. I don't think that a
Speaker 1: death threat is ever warranted. I don't think that that's ever.
Speaker 1: There's never an appropriate time, no matter how hurt you're feeling,
Speaker 1: to use your words to mentally harm somebody else, because
Speaker 1: you're never you never know how they're going to take it. UM.
Speaker 1: If you have an issue with me with brendon the situation,
Speaker 1: that is absolutely fine, But I would either free keep
Speaker 1: it to yourself or address it in a way that
Speaker 1: is open to conversation rather than being like I hate
Speaker 1: you're the worst, kill yourself whatever, because that's that's not okay,
Speaker 1: and that's not a conversation, and you're just trying to
Speaker 1: harm somebody, and you're just a jerk. You're the jerk
Speaker 1: if you say yes, you know I am. I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't understand well, and and maybe it's just my
Speaker 1: ignorance speaking, but well, first, I guess I wanted to
Speaker 1: say that all this happened almost exactly a year ago,
Speaker 1: which is crazy to think about because it's a long
Speaker 1: time and uh, you know, in my opinion, I think
Speaker 1: people should eventually be able to move on. But I
Speaker 1: don't remember. I don't remember why Natasha would have any
Speaker 1: real reason to be upset, Like I guess she was
Speaker 1: the one talking to Brendan before you had gotten there.
Speaker 1: But other than that, like, that's basically what paradise is is, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, dating someone until they find a better connection,
Speaker 1: or if they don't find a better connection, then you
Speaker 1: continue to date them yourself. It's not like I mean,
Speaker 1: I sure, maybe it wasn't the most ideal scenario, but
Speaker 1: I don't think it's anything to really like dwell on
Speaker 1: and be super upset about into into perpetuity. You know,
Speaker 1: in my opinion, at least from what I remember at least, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I would agree with that, but I don't
Speaker 1: want to devalue her feelings in any way. I think
Speaker 1: that from what from my understanding, you know, and this
Speaker 1: was a year ago, so like trying to remember back,
Speaker 1: I think that she felt lied to and led on
Speaker 1: because I was she think. I think in her eyes,
Speaker 1: she thought that Brendan always knew that I was coming,
Speaker 1: and that was not the case. I didn't even know
Speaker 1: that I was coming. So I think that she was
Speaker 1: she felt like she was used from week to week
Speaker 1: until I got there for Brendan and I to be together,
Speaker 1: which I understand how the optics of that could could
Speaker 1: be very hurtful, that you felt like you were being
Speaker 1: led on that wasn't the case. But if that's her feelings,
Speaker 1: and I absolutely I don't want to take that away
Speaker 1: from her. But you're absolutely right, Dean, like Paradise is
Speaker 1: about dating anybody that you want to date, to find
Speaker 1: that connection for your person, and that's that's like what
Speaker 1: real life is too. Yeah, yeah, I mean, come on, no,
Speaker 1: I think that's well said, Piper. I think that's really
Speaker 1: well said, and so you guys have moved on, and
Speaker 1: we're very happy for you. I'm glad that you guys
Speaker 1: are still together, because you guys did leave in such
Speaker 1: a timurtious way, and and I like, I'm sure, um,
Speaker 1: I'm sure. It just was hard, and so it's good
Speaker 1: to see that you guys have made it work, and
Speaker 1: especially like in New York Boston. You know, I feel
Speaker 1: like this country just really needs to come together. And
Speaker 1: I think that's good symbolism right there, New York and Boston.
Speaker 1: It's like I I was in New York earlier this week.
Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta admit, I'm just not in New York.
Speaker 1: I never have been, never will be. I mean, like
Speaker 1: sports also has generated that, like my hate for the Yankees, Giants,
Speaker 1: all that good stuff. But uh yeah, just like the city. Damn,
Speaker 1: I don't know how you do it, dude. We were
Speaker 1: pushing Dawson because so we had to go for this
Speaker 1: event with our formula company, which is really great. Their
Speaker 1: name is Bobby. They're the best. And uh, we're pushing
Speaker 1: Dawson and a stroller down the streets of New York
Speaker 1: City and just that city is not made for babies
Speaker 1: or kids. Holy hell. It feels like we're just in intruding,
Speaker 1: you know, with a baby. It just feels that way.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh God, everybody hates us. We're in everybody's way.
Speaker 1: Everybody is flying past us, We're in their way, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, God, get me out of here. Like I'm
Speaker 1: just raise kids, and people raise kids in the city
Speaker 1: though right, like it's it's probably not super common, but
Speaker 1: I don't see it. I see no babies. I mean
Speaker 1: you don't see them. They're at home or you'll see
Speaker 1: like during the day, like the nanny's with the kids.
Speaker 1: But don't take it personally because in New York, everybody's
Speaker 1: in everybody else's way. Like if you're not speed walking
Speaker 1: down the sidewalk, then you were in somebody's way. So
Speaker 1: it wasn't a personal attack on having a baby. It's
Speaker 1: just the reality of being New York. It sounds like
Speaker 1: a Seinfeld episode, but if they didn't make one, maybe
Speaker 1: they would make any one. Um. All right, well, Piper,
Speaker 1: thanks for thanks for bearing all with us on that
Speaker 1: a little bit. We're thank you for being open. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're gonna take a quick break. We're gonna get right
Speaker 1: back into this episode with hopefully not any dating topics,
Speaker 1: but I do know that there's a couple that Jared
Speaker 1: has died to get into, including Andy Cohen's dating site usage.
Speaker 1: So uh, stick around through the break. We'll be right
Speaker 1: back right everybody, welcome back to help I suck at dating.
Speaker 1: We're gonna get to some emails real quick. But before
Speaker 1: we do that, I want to, well, Jared and I
Speaker 1: both want to, I guess, talk about real quick. Becat
Speaker 1: Tilly Hard launching her relationship with Haley on Instagram. Um, Jared,
Speaker 1: what are your thoughts about this? Oh my god, I'm
Speaker 1: so happy Becca are a good friend and our fellow
Speaker 1: podcaster with I heard radio checker out scrubbing in. Not
Speaker 1: that she needs more listeners because they're like a three
Speaker 1: times People's Choice Award winner. If anything, they should be
Speaker 1: putting listeners over this way. Anyway, that's beside the point
Speaker 1: where we're congratulating Becca for her relationship hard launch with
Speaker 1: Hailey Kiyoko. I think is how you say your last name?
Speaker 1: Becca just posted on Instagram with caption hard to say
Speaker 1: if this is a Harder self launch, but it is
Speaker 1: a launch hashtag, Um, Jared, what do you think? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I mean, first I just want to say that we're
Speaker 1: only doing this to try to steal some listeners from
Speaker 1: scrubbing in, because like, who else really cares? Obviously, we
Speaker 1: just care about the listeners over here. Uh, listen, this
Speaker 1: is great, I Becca. You know a lot of people
Speaker 1: come up to me, and I'm sure they come up
Speaker 1: to you and they ask about our fellow Bachelor alum
Speaker 1: and they're like, what are they like in real life? Like?
Speaker 1: What are they like in real life? And a lot
Speaker 1: of times I say, they're exactly what you think they
Speaker 1: are or there you know there because if you follow
Speaker 1: them on Instagram, they are who you know they're They're
Speaker 1: very raw and real. And with Becca, you know, I
Speaker 1: double down on that because everybody, you know, she puts
Speaker 1: out this. Yeah, everybody thinks she's so sweet and so
Speaker 1: endearing and honest, and the truth is she is. She
Speaker 1: is that sweet and she is that good of a
Speaker 1: person and a of Becca, she's Ashley is very good
Speaker 1: friends with her, and I've become close with her as
Speaker 1: well through really podcasting, you know, being able to see
Speaker 1: her in a weekly basis at the Our Heart studio
Speaker 1: and then you know, being able to take these trips.
Speaker 1: That's something we used to be able to take before
Speaker 1: the pandemic, you know, for I heart events, and we'd
Speaker 1: always hang out together, all of us, like all the podcasts,
Speaker 1: and uh, you know, she's been with Hailey for a
Speaker 1: while now, and uh, it just they're so happy together,
Speaker 1: and uh, bec is such a great person and I
Speaker 1: couldn't be happy for honestly, it's just a it's a
Speaker 1: it's a great day. Uh yeah, I would. I would
Speaker 1: echo all of that stuff too. I love to talk
Speaker 1: as much crap as I can about former contestants, included
Speaker 1: any chance I get. Whenever anyone asked me like, oh,
Speaker 1: what's this person like, I'm always like, oh, they suck
Speaker 1: her the worst. I don't even don't even waste your time.
Speaker 1: But whenever Becky gets brought up, yeah she's great. I've
Speaker 1: never met anyone that's ever had any single thing bad
Speaker 1: thing to say about Becca. She is, Uh, she's awesome,
Speaker 1: and I'm just super happy for her. It's you know,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm sure it's never easy for someone to uh
Speaker 1: put themselves out there the way that she just did,
Speaker 1: even just through this Instagram post, and so, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: a lot of props to her for doing that, and
Speaker 1: you know, I know she she's she knows what she's
Speaker 1: doing for herself. She's taken, she took her time, and
Speaker 1: I'm really happy for them, and I'm excited to get
Speaker 1: to finally watch some nice, lovey dovey content out of
Speaker 1: her because she has been she ever since going on
Speaker 1: The Bachelor Ben's season. It seems like she's never really
Speaker 1: been in a relationship with anyone. So it'll be fun
Speaker 1: to see like this new side of Becca, you know,
Speaker 1: like the the girlfriend's side where she gets to post
Speaker 1: like the cute stuff and uh not have to worry
Speaker 1: about any one or anything and just kind of do
Speaker 1: what she wants to do. So UM, happy for her.
Speaker 1: I can't wait to see what what continues to unfold
Speaker 1: for them. So that's that's said. Let's get to some emails.
Speaker 1: We have East in here with his in and out shirt,
Speaker 1: which is uh, I don't know. I'm more of a
Speaker 1: shake shock guy. But continuing, it's what a hammering is
Speaker 1: all about. Let's see some emails. This first one's from Macy.
Speaker 1: I hope it's Macy Gray. I've been dating my boyfriend
Speaker 1: since college, so going on seven years now. He used
Speaker 1: to bring me flowers once a week, planned date nights,
Speaker 1: pick up coffee for me on Sunday morning, etcetera. He
Speaker 1: doesn't do any of those things anymore, and I don't
Speaker 1: want to have expectations, but I miss it. I don't
Speaker 1: ask for much, but I want him to make an
Speaker 1: effort like he used to. Am I being unrealistic? Do
Speaker 1: I tell him how I feel and how I missed
Speaker 1: those little moments of him making me feel special? Rob listen, Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't know if anybody else, uh. I don't want
Speaker 1: to sound like a dick, but as a guy who
Speaker 1: has done things like this in the past and maybe
Speaker 1: doesn't do them as much anymore because we're further in
Speaker 1: the relationship and I put aing on it. I gotta admit, Macie,
Speaker 1: he just like it's just like he's not gonna do that,
Speaker 1: and he'll do it sometimes hopefully doesn't sometimes, but come on,
Speaker 1: it's seven years of the relationship, like get your own coffee.
Speaker 1: Not so much. I didn't mean it that way. I
Speaker 1: just meant, you know, it's tough because I guess I
Speaker 1: get frustrated at it because Ashley presents the same thing
Speaker 1: to me where she's like, we're not romantic anymore. We
Speaker 1: don't do anything anymore, like you used to do little
Speaker 1: things for me, and I'm like, I'm trying, but like,
Speaker 1: we have a kid, we have the business. We've been
Speaker 1: dating for so long. Our relationship has changed, our love
Speaker 1: has changed for better. I would like to think it's
Speaker 1: not in that like, oh, we you know, do dishes
Speaker 1: together and it's the cutest thing. It's like someone's gonna
Speaker 1: do the dishes right now and someone else is gonna
Speaker 1: get time for themselves. Like that's our relationship and it's
Speaker 1: not a bad thing. It's just changed. So I guess
Speaker 1: that's why I have like personal investment in this question,
Speaker 1: because I'm like, like, that is Ashley incognito here and
Speaker 1: writing this in as may see. Did you guys ever
Speaker 1: watch Scrubs? The TV show from like the late nineties?
Speaker 1: Great show? Anyway, I was randomly watching it the other
Speaker 1: day because it was on TV and I used to
Speaker 1: love it. So I was watching it, and for the
Speaker 1: five or ten minutes I was watching it, this exact
Speaker 1: topic was brought up. It was Turk's girlfriend and him.
Speaker 1: I can't remember Turk's girlfriend's name, but she goes, hey,
Speaker 1: you're not romantic with me anymore. I used to come
Speaker 1: home from working be so romantic and turkos yeah, baby,
Speaker 1: because that's when I was still trying to get into
Speaker 1: your delicates. And it's like it's true, like, honestly, as
Speaker 1: bad as it is to say, guys at the beginning
Speaker 1: of the relationship are trying to put their best foot
Speaker 1: forward behavior. It's not that it's not that they love
Speaker 1: you any less. It's just that the romance changes and
Speaker 1: the love evolves, and sometimes uh, some things like those
Speaker 1: gestures like getting flowers and stuff. Uh you know, not
Speaker 1: that they take a back seat, but that just transforms
Speaker 1: into another way of expressing your affection. And I think
Speaker 1: that it's important to take note of those things when
Speaker 1: they happen, you know, Like I mean, does he have
Speaker 1: to get you coffee every Sunday? Like one Sunday every month?
Speaker 1: Is that Okay? That's pretty good, right? Adjust the expectations. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that it's like definitely, like have a conversation
Speaker 1: about it, Like if that's something you expect to vocalize that,
Speaker 1: say something, but yeah, maybe change the expectation and then
Speaker 1: like do a do a really strong date night one
Speaker 1: night and be like this is our night to like
Speaker 1: fully go out on romance and then have that be it. Also,
Speaker 1: I want to play double's advocate here. I think, um
Speaker 1: that this don't I don't like the whole Like you've
Speaker 1: been in a relationship for so long, the relationship changes,
Speaker 1: you don't do don't do as many nice things for
Speaker 1: people anymore. Uh. I live in constant fear that my
Speaker 1: wife's gonna leave me. I don't think that it's I'm
Speaker 1: trying to think of like a healthy way to like
Speaker 1: to vocalize this, but it's unhealthy. I'm secure. I'm secure
Speaker 1: in our relationship because if she wants to leave me,
Speaker 1: she has to find a judge in a turn me.
Speaker 1: That's difficult, but I do. I do live in fear
Speaker 1: that she like that she's not going to love me anymore.
Speaker 1: And I know she's not going to. But I think
Speaker 1: that fear keeps me from becoming a big fat slob.
Speaker 1: It keeps me from not tweeting her the way I
Speaker 1: always have, UM and so. And that being said, like
Speaker 1: I don't like bring her like I you know, I
Speaker 1: brought her coffee in bed right before we started the podcast.
Speaker 1: I don't do that because I'm like, oh, if I
Speaker 1: don't do this, You're going to leave me. I just
Speaker 1: like I like that feeling from the early part of
Speaker 1: the relationship and I don't want to lose that, and
Speaker 1: so uh, and she does a lot of really nice
Speaker 1: stuff for me all the time. Um, So I don't know.
Speaker 1: That's just something like I'm not saying you should have
Speaker 1: like fear in your long term, secure relationship, but I
Speaker 1: think a little bit of it is good. I also,
Speaker 1: I want to say one thing to that, which Eastern
Speaker 1: that's so sweet and endearing and I love it, and
Speaker 1: you're such an amazing human being. Having said that, I
Speaker 1: do see that she is always going to movies that
Speaker 1: you love or watching shows that you love to watch,
Speaker 1: and like going to Cheesecake Factory or Disneyland. And I'm
Speaker 1: sure she enjoys these things as well. But I feel
Speaker 1: like there's a little compromise there where she does so
Speaker 1: much for you and you do so much for her.
Speaker 1: Would I be wrong in saying that, You're not wrong
Speaker 1: in saying that. So my point with Macy would be, like,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm sure he could probably do a better
Speaker 1: job of planning date nights and getting you coffee more often,
Speaker 1: and like just showing those little moments like hey, babe,
Speaker 1: I love you, I appreciate you. Um. But Macie, maybe
Speaker 1: maybe you could do something like that for him as well.
Speaker 1: Maybe you already do. I'm not sure it wasn't in
Speaker 1: this email. You could easily have done that. I would
Speaker 1: have a conversation let him know, like, Hey, those moments
Speaker 1: meant a lot to me. But maybe you could also
Speaker 1: show by example and be like, I love you so much.
Speaker 1: Here is something that I wanted to give to you
Speaker 1: or show you my appreciation. I want to hear what
Speaker 1: Easton has to say about what you just said, Jared,
Speaker 1: in regards to bringing her to She's kick factoring all
Speaker 1: those things. Easton, what's your what's your opinion on that? Well?
Speaker 1: She uh is very very patient. She's a very patient woman.
Speaker 1: And she uh she does indulge. She indulges me a lot.
Speaker 1: And and I mean, Jared has a point. It's a
Speaker 1: two way street. I think, Um, I think Macy. If
Speaker 1: Macy isn't doing anything to make this man feel special,
Speaker 1: then that then that's a problem. Um. But uh, I
Speaker 1: mean Allison does. It's it's uneven. D Allison does much
Speaker 1: more for me than I do for her. I have
Speaker 1: to I have to agree with that. Um. But but yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's that's what marriage, that's what relationship is.
Speaker 1: It's uh it's And let me say, I think Ashley
Speaker 1: does way more for me than I do for her,
Speaker 1: and I need to start doing war as well. But
Speaker 1: like she goes, she like, like, we went to go
Speaker 1: see Top Gun earlier this week, and she planned it
Speaker 1: like she was the one who like planned everything, invited
Speaker 1: all our friends, like did the whole thing, and as
Speaker 1: much as she wanted to see top Gun, like, she
Speaker 1: really did it for me, you know so well, And
Speaker 1: that's what I wanted to get into as well, because
Speaker 1: Caitlin and I, uh, I don't want to say we
Speaker 1: argue about this, but it has been a point of
Speaker 1: conversation for us a couple of times where even just yesterday,
Speaker 1: on our way to dinner together, we like stopped by
Speaker 1: Lowe's to pick up some stuff for the backyard, and
Speaker 1: she goes, why don't you ever run errands with me?
Speaker 1: And I always run errands with you, or like she'll
Speaker 1: get invited to like a influencer party where she's like, hey,
Speaker 1: why don't you come to these influencer parties with me,
Speaker 1: and I always come to things like I always I'll
Speaker 1: like rock climb with you or I'll go hiking with you.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, and this is my logic, this is
Speaker 1: just how my brain works, messed up as it might be.
Speaker 1: I'm like, the things that I'm doing and inviting you
Speaker 1: too are significantly more enjoyable and better for your soul
Speaker 1: than going to like an influencer party and having to
Speaker 1: mingle around these little parties and stuff like that. So
Speaker 1: that's how I justify to my head where I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to go to these party because I
Speaker 1: don't want to, you know what, hang out with Cameron
Speaker 1: Diaz and I don't enjoy them. I honestly do not
Speaker 1: care like a supposed would be like see her from
Speaker 1: a distance, Cameron Das, Hey, cool, how are you? Um,
Speaker 1: it's just it's not enough of a of a draw
Speaker 1: for me to be interested in it. And and it's
Speaker 1: just it's it's hearing you guys say these things. It
Speaker 1: makes me not sad, but helps helps put things in
Speaker 1: a perspective for me, because I do think that things
Speaker 1: that I bring drag Kalin along with me too are
Speaker 1: are good and I don't think that, uh, some of
Speaker 1: those influencer parties are good for me personally just because
Speaker 1: then I get in a bad mood and no one
Speaker 1: wants me to be in a bad mood. Um. So
Speaker 1: that's where that's that's where I was coming from with
Speaker 1: all that kind of stuff paper. Between you and Brendan,
Speaker 1: who do you think, uh gives more in the relationship
Speaker 1: in that sense? That's actually such a good question because
Speaker 1: I think we both give in different ways because our
Speaker 1: love languages are super different. Like I am very much
Speaker 1: abouts of service and gifts. I love giving like physical
Speaker 1: things or like doing cool things, where Brendon's more about
Speaker 1: words of affirmation, which I suck at. Um. So I
Speaker 1: think that like we have a good system. Also, like
Speaker 1: the distance helps because like when we're doing stuff together,
Speaker 1: like we have to do things together because we're in
Speaker 1: each other's cities. But Frendon would agree with you, Deine.
Speaker 1: He hates going to parties, he hates like doing influencer events,
Speaker 1: and I love that stuff, but it's usually in New
Speaker 1: York where it's like my friends and the people that
Speaker 1: I know. Um, But we'll kind of do a thing
Speaker 1: like if we're in the same city for like, let's
Speaker 1: say like five days, we'll do each of us plans
Speaker 1: a date night, so we get to kind of like
Speaker 1: do something that we want to do and bring the
Speaker 1: other person to um. But it's like both of us
Speaker 1: get to experience together. So like I took him to it.
Speaker 1: We went to raman super casual than ice cream, and
Speaker 1: then went to a comedy show because I knew he
Speaker 1: would like the comedy show and I know he doesn't
Speaker 1: like big fancy dinners. And then for his date night,
Speaker 1: he took me to like a big fancy dinner with
Speaker 1: like a skyline view of New York, which is like,
Speaker 1: I'm boudjie, so I love that stuff. So it's like
Speaker 1: we have that that give and take where we both
Speaker 1: get to kind of benefit to see the other person's
Speaker 1: point of view, and then we get to separate for
Speaker 1: two weeks. And I'll tell you what, I think that's
Speaker 1: a good thing. You know. I think it's good that
Speaker 1: both people have their things and sometimes you don't want
Speaker 1: to do it, and then sometimes you can surprise them
Speaker 1: and treat them to it. I think it's a it's
Speaker 1: a healthy dynamic to have if you want. It's all
Speaker 1: about the given the take and and just knowing your partner,
Speaker 1: like knowing what they like, because I would never if
Speaker 1: I was planning a day night for friend and then
Speaker 1: never be like, let's go to the super busy social
Speaker 1: gathering where you have to be around a ton of
Speaker 1: people because he's just a little more introvert than that.
Speaker 1: And that's totally fine. Yeah, it's true. Uh yeah, I've
Speaker 1: been planning some things for Kalen, like a proposal perhaps,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, well, maybe I want to take her
Speaker 1: to where I want to go, but no, I should
Speaker 1: probably take her to where she wants to get. You
Speaker 1: get right over that. What do you mean you're planning
Speaker 1: a proposal. I'm just sitting right next door. Sorry, I'm
Speaker 1: trying to figure out a little bit. Well for this
Speaker 1: the purposes of this podcast, that will be the headline
Speaker 1: that we're sending to every single US weekly, and I'm
Speaker 1: speaking directly to US Weekly. Don't need to confirm that
Speaker 1: headline can say plans on proposing you guys on this podcast,
Speaker 1: that it's going to happen before the end of this year.
Speaker 1: So it's nothing new to you, guys. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying is you're actively planning it. Well, how yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess how active can someone really How active could
Speaker 1: I really be? You know, let's be honest. Well, I
Speaker 1: think it's like let me let me, let me make
Speaker 1: an analogy to a film like you were in the
Speaker 1: pre production stage of of like filming. Now you're in production.
Speaker 1: You are in production. It's happening. And the release date
Speaker 1: at late at the latest is December thirty one. Sure
Speaker 1: I would say it's still pre production, but you know,
Speaker 1: I'm not as a kin to the movies seen as
Speaker 1: you are. Um, I did want to talk to you,
Speaker 1: Jared about I don't maybe we shouldn't talk about it
Speaker 1: because you can go on and on forever, but I
Speaker 1: did want to dedicate at least a few minutes of
Speaker 1: this podcast for you to talk about top gun. I
Speaker 1: don't want to allow to if if we have time,
Speaker 1: well I don't know if we do. I doubt we
Speaker 1: we do. But well, let me let me end the
Speaker 1: podcast in this way too. Things is one Macie, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for your email. We really appreciate it.
Speaker 1: We wishing nothing but the best in your relationship. So
Speaker 1: please talk to your boyfriend. But let's, you know, think
Speaker 1: about what we all said. Uh, to Piper, thank you
Speaker 1: so much for joining us. You're the best Piper. You're
Speaker 1: sticking around because you're gonna do this Thursday's podcast with us,
Speaker 1: which is very exciting. And then thirdly before we go, yes,
Speaker 1: of course, Top Gun Maverick got to see it on Tuesday.
Speaker 1: It was incredible. It was such a great experience to
Speaker 1: see it in theaters. It's like it's Tom Cruise had
Speaker 1: a quote, uh in one of the interviews and they said,
Speaker 1: did you ever think about releasing this to streaming because
Speaker 1: we're supposed to come out And he said, no, I
Speaker 1: make movies for the big screen, and this is a
Speaker 1: movie for the big screen. And I love that so
Speaker 1: much because I love movies. I love going to movie theaters,
Speaker 1: and this is a movie that you should really see
Speaker 1: in theaters. And it's just a great movie. Uh. Tom
Speaker 1: Cruise is at the peak of he's just incredible. It's
Speaker 1: like watching Brady throw for four yards like nowadays, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, where it's just like you're watching
Speaker 1: greatness happen and you just forget how great of an
Speaker 1: actor Tom Cruise is and how much of a superstar
Speaker 1: he really is. The visuals of this movie are incredible,
Speaker 1: it's emotional, it's a really great story. It was a
Speaker 1: lot of fun to watch, so I couldn't recommend it enough.
Speaker 1: Go see Top Gun Maverick, and that's going to do
Speaker 1: it For this week's episode of Help I Suck At Dating,
Speaker 1: make sure you tune in next week, where hopefully we
Speaker 1: all suck just a little less. Follow help by Suck
Speaker 1: At Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen
Speaker 1: to podcast