1
00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:02,840
Speaker 1: Brought to you by the reinvented two thousand twelve camera.

2
00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:09,880
Speaker 1: It's ready. Are you welcome to Stuff Mom Never told you?

3
00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:17,479
Speaker 1: From House Stuff Works dot Com. Hello, and welcome to

4
00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:21,919
Speaker 1: the podcast. I'm Kristen and I'm Caroline and Caroline. Since

5
00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:25,479
Speaker 1: we're talking about fake orgasms today, I just want to

6
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:28,040
Speaker 1: go ahead and get the one Harry met Sally reference

7
00:00:28,200 --> 00:00:32,920
Speaker 1: out of the way. In almost every article that we read,

8
00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:39,280
Speaker 1: Nora Ephron's hit about friends who can't possibly not be

9
00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:43,400
Speaker 1: lovers came up because there's that famous scene with Meg

10
00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:47,920
Speaker 1: Ryan faggy and orgasm to Billy Crystal and catsas Deli

11
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:51,040
Speaker 1: in New York City, and it's hilarious and no I'm

12
00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,840
Speaker 1: not going to reenact it because that would be very inappropriate,

13
00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:57,920
Speaker 1: but there it is, and their conversation in the movie

14
00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:00,200
Speaker 1: during that scene pretty much sums of everything that going

15
00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:04,320
Speaker 1: to talk about, and which is basically like Meg Ryan saying, oh, well,

16
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:06,600
Speaker 1: everybody every woman's faked it at one point or another,

17
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:09,240
Speaker 1: and Billy Crystals like, oh but not with me, and

18
00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,800
Speaker 1: she goes, well, you do the math. Every woman's faked

19
00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,440
Speaker 1: it and every man thinks that they haven't, so but not.

20
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:19,680
Speaker 1: It's not the entire conversation that it's not that cut

21
00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:24,119
Speaker 1: and dry. Yeah, So before we get into statistics, because

22
00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:26,760
Speaker 1: we got a lot of statistics to go over with

23
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:30,240
Speaker 1: fake orgasms, because I'm sure everybody's wanting to know what

24
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:35,280
Speaker 1: percentage of women have done it? Have men done it too? Um?

25
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:40,119
Speaker 1: But the whole female faking thing has a lot of

26
00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:43,880
Speaker 1: cultural baggage with it as well. That goes way back

27
00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:47,640
Speaker 1: beyond when Harry Melt Sally. Yeah, goes back to the Victorians,

28
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:51,080
Speaker 1: those dark Victorians. They always come up, what do they Why?

29
00:01:51,120 --> 00:01:56,400
Speaker 1: Why are we still suffering under Victorian things stuff? At

30
00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:59,040
Speaker 1: least we got Graham crackers and corn flakes out of it,

31
00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:02,080
Speaker 1: I guess, and doubt Navvy And although it's more of

32
00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:07,800
Speaker 1: an Edwardian anyway. Um. Yes, Well, during the Victorian era,

33
00:02:09,280 --> 00:02:12,600
Speaker 1: the woman's orgasm came to be seen as sort of

34
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:17,040
Speaker 1: an unnecessary part of sexual intercourse. It really was sort

35
00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:20,320
Speaker 1: of viewed as a man's thing to really enjoy sex

36
00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:22,799
Speaker 1: and have an orgasm, whereas women were supposed to lie

37
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:26,000
Speaker 1: back and think of England and if they didn't orgasm,

38
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:29,480
Speaker 1: who cares? Right? Well, there was the point made by

39
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:34,359
Speaker 1: Brian Fawz in performing sex, the making and unmaking of

40
00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:39,760
Speaker 1: women's erotic lives. That the sort of self imposed sexual

41
00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:46,560
Speaker 1: oppression became linked during that era to higher class for women. Yeah, um,

42
00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:50,440
Speaker 1: not only higher class, but it's it's funny to talk

43
00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:54,679
Speaker 1: about uh sex and gender and all this stuff in

44
00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:59,240
Speaker 1: the Victorian area era. Excuse me because um tied into

45
00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:03,320
Speaker 1: all this is his sterea, the female disease which was

46
00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:07,160
Speaker 1: caused in their minds by a wandering womb, which goes

47
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:13,720
Speaker 1: back to Hippocrates. Hippocrates Um who said that the you know,

48
00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:18,679
Speaker 1: women might go crazy because they're their uteruses are are

49
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:22,600
Speaker 1: wandering around, just wandering, wandering the womb. But if you

50
00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:29,200
Speaker 1: fast forward to the eighties, when the first vibrators were invented, Um,

51
00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:32,480
Speaker 1: they realized that they could cure hysteria, all of this

52
00:03:32,639 --> 00:03:37,160
Speaker 1: anxiety and sleeplessness and excessive sexual fantasy that these women

53
00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:41,440
Speaker 1: were experiencing by bringing women to orgasms. Right, and this

54
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:45,080
Speaker 1: was something done in doctor's offices, Like medical professionals were

55
00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:48,200
Speaker 1: leading women to orgasm as a way to be like, hey,

56
00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,800
Speaker 1: just calm down, don't don't have so much anxiety in

57
00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,560
Speaker 1: your life, lady. And it's it's I can't believe that

58
00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:56,480
Speaker 1: an orgasm went from being a normal thing that men

59
00:03:56,520 --> 00:04:01,640
Speaker 1: and women experience to something that women shouldn't experience because

60
00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:05,080
Speaker 1: they're too classy for that, to being something that happens

61
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:08,480
Speaker 1: in doctor's offices. But then after that though, I mean, like,

62
00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:12,480
Speaker 1: if we're talking about orgasm today, not only is it

63
00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:17,600
Speaker 1: considered this normalized part or expected part of the sexual experience,

64
00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:23,320
Speaker 1: but that is we conflate sex with orgasm. Yeah, good

65
00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:27,920
Speaker 1: sex equals having an orgasm. It's an expectation. It's also um,

66
00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,720
Speaker 1: I think brand Faz also frames it as a type

67
00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:33,840
Speaker 1: of gift that women give. And we're talking to at

68
00:04:33,839 --> 00:04:37,479
Speaker 1: this point about heterosexual women a gift that they give

69
00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:40,800
Speaker 1: to their male partner. Yeah, And as as far as

70
00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:43,839
Speaker 1: it's more of the history goes of of sexual intercourse

71
00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:48,880
Speaker 1: and orgasms and how they relate um, the psychoanalysts. Freud

72
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:52,159
Speaker 1: got in on the discussion and it became okay suddenly

73
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:54,719
Speaker 1: for women to have orgasms, expected for that to happen.

74
00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:58,560
Speaker 1: But you're a weirdo if you can't have an orgasm

75
00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:03,000
Speaker 1: through vaginal intercourse alone, right. Floyd Freud was very dismissive

76
00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:06,679
Speaker 1: of c literal stimulation. He said that was basically for girls.

77
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,360
Speaker 1: And if you cannot figure out how to have an

78
00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:16,160
Speaker 1: orgasm through penile vaginal intercourse, you really weren't a woman. Yeah,

79
00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:19,560
Speaker 1: not a real woman. And then so fast forward, way

80
00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:24,520
Speaker 1: forward into the dawn of the feminist movement. Feminist activism

81
00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:28,440
Speaker 1: and the female orgasm, according to Jane Gerhard, came to

82
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:33,000
Speaker 1: signify the political power of women's sexual self determination. So

83
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:36,359
Speaker 1: suddenly the discourse was more about we can have an

84
00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:38,240
Speaker 1: orgasm anyway we want, and we deserve to have an

85
00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,839
Speaker 1: orgasm any way we want, right, and it shouldn't just

86
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:45,200
Speaker 1: be some kind of gift or performance unless it is

87
00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:49,160
Speaker 1: a gift or performance, you know, for ourselves. Maybe that

88
00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:54,640
Speaker 1: just sounds like masturbation though, which was another two part podcast, right, yeah,

89
00:05:54,640 --> 00:05:58,160
Speaker 1: we've already covered that. Um yeah. The author of that

90
00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:02,240
Speaker 1: Making an Unmaking of Woman's Rotic Lives book sites research

91
00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:05,160
Speaker 1: that shows that some women tend to downplay the significance

92
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:07,800
Speaker 1: of orgasm, while other women rate it as the most

93
00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:12,039
Speaker 1: important feature of sexual satisfaction. And so now we're getting

94
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:15,440
Speaker 1: into more of the oh well it's okay, you just

95
00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:19,440
Speaker 1: go ahead kind of mentality that some women have about sex. Right,

96
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:22,200
Speaker 1: and a lot of Surveys from the Kinsey Institute have

97
00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:26,160
Speaker 1: found that if you ask men and women whether or

98
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:31,440
Speaker 1: not sex can be satisfying without an orgasm, way more

99
00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:34,680
Speaker 1: women will say yeah, that's okay, compared to men who

100
00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,720
Speaker 1: are like, oh, I gonna know, I mean sort of,

101
00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:41,760
Speaker 1: that's what that's my end goal, right, And that Fause

102
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:44,600
Speaker 1: says that by downplaying the importance of orgasms, women may

103
00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:48,000
Speaker 1: be indicating that they don't value their orgasmic pleasure, or

104
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:51,000
Speaker 1: like you were saying, it could be that they have

105
00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:54,359
Speaker 1: placed a greater importance on other aspects of relationships. So

106
00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:59,039
Speaker 1: maybe just emotional connectedness, but uh, having the connectedness of

107
00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:04,040
Speaker 1: sex is more important than actually achieving orgasm. Um. So

108
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:08,280
Speaker 1: by that, by extension of that logic, you would think

109
00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:13,160
Speaker 1: that if we're faking orgasm, it would be too foster

110
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:19,840
Speaker 1: emotional intimacy or to trappaman depending on what you're reading,

111
00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:22,560
Speaker 1: Depending on what you're reading, because there's also the notion

112
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:26,440
Speaker 1: that you know, completely opposite to that, that faking an

113
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,240
Speaker 1: orgasm is a way for us to distance ourselves from

114
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,240
Speaker 1: male sexual partners by ourselves, I'm still talking again about

115
00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:36,000
Speaker 1: heterosexual women will talk about same sex relationships a little

116
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,600
Speaker 1: bit later on, Um, do you want to get into

117
00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:41,600
Speaker 1: some statistics. Let's do it. Hit the stats, let's set

118
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,720
Speaker 1: the stats. There have been a number of studies and

119
00:07:44,920 --> 00:07:50,800
Speaker 1: surveys on women faking it, women specifically faking it from

120
00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:55,000
Speaker 1: nineteen seventy three to the present day. A series of

121
00:07:55,000 --> 00:08:00,400
Speaker 1: studies have found that anywhere from fifty three to sixty

122
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:05,800
Speaker 1: five percent of both married and unmarried women have pretended

123
00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:10,440
Speaker 1: to climax at some point. Um. There was a study

124
00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:12,200
Speaker 1: I believe it came out in two thousand and ten

125
00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:16,800
Speaker 1: from Aaron Cooper who was a psychologist at Temple University,

126
00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:20,040
Speaker 1: and she talked to three hundred and sixty six women

127
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:23,360
Speaker 1: ages eighteen to thirty two and found that about sixty

128
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:27,440
Speaker 1: percent of these women faked it. And I thought that

129
00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:32,560
Speaker 1: this study was kind of compelling because the number one

130
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:37,199
Speaker 1: reason that she found for these mostly college females faking

131
00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:40,960
Speaker 1: it was creating distance. And then she also found for

132
00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:45,440
Speaker 1: a small subset said that it actually enhanced their own

133
00:08:45,679 --> 00:08:47,840
Speaker 1: sexual experience. Was kind of a fake it till you

134
00:08:47,880 --> 00:08:51,360
Speaker 1: make it sort of thing. Yeah, maybe the faking it

135
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,839
Speaker 1: just turned them on more and maybe they could actually

136
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:56,800
Speaker 1: achieve a real orgasm. Well yeah, by maybe by by

137
00:08:56,880 --> 00:09:00,120
Speaker 1: faking excitement that could turn the other person on or

138
00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:04,200
Speaker 1: as well, and then it's sort of snowballs. Perhaps Yeah. UM.

139
00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:07,760
Speaker 1: Some other reasons that people say in various studies that

140
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:12,280
Speaker 1: they faked orgasm. We're avoiding the blame and pressure that

141
00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:17,080
Speaker 1: comes along with with sex and avoiding conflict, doubt, guilt, shame,

142
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:20,680
Speaker 1: whether it's yours or your partners. UM and some people

143
00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:24,360
Speaker 1: that Fause talked to you in her book, Basically we're saying,

144
00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:26,240
Speaker 1: you know, well, I don't have a good reason for

145
00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:29,400
Speaker 1: not you know, orgasm NG, so maybe I should just

146
00:09:29,840 --> 00:09:33,120
Speaker 1: go ahead and fake it. I feel bad about it. Oh,

147
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:35,960
Speaker 1: these expectations. A lot of this goes back to UH,

148
00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:39,640
Speaker 1: to these sex roles and these sexual scripts that we

149
00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:45,559
Speaker 1: take into the bedroom and feel so compelled to follow. UM.

150
00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:48,320
Speaker 1: And in addition to you know, not wanting to have

151
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:52,600
Speaker 1: to explain yourself, there's also the idea of wanting to

152
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:58,760
Speaker 1: make your partner feel adequate, especially among UH opposite sex couples.

153
00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:04,760
Speaker 1: There was a study from the University of Kansas from

154
00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:10,520
Speaker 1: Charlene L. Mullenhard and Sheina K. Shippy, and she similar

155
00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:14,120
Speaker 1: to the Temple University study I just mentioned, pulled both

156
00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:17,600
Speaker 1: male and female students and asked whether they had faked orgasm,

157
00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:23,160
Speaker 1: and the number one reason why the of women said

158
00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:26,520
Speaker 1: yes they had faked an orgasm was that they didn't

159
00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:29,800
Speaker 1: want to bruise the guy's egos. This would be called

160
00:10:29,960 --> 00:10:37,240
Speaker 1: altruistic deceit. Yeah, that's uh, that's interesting because men's a

161
00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:39,960
Speaker 1: lot of men's reasons for faking it are similar to

162
00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,280
Speaker 1: women's the same, like they just wanted to be over

163
00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:44,360
Speaker 1: or they know they're not going to achieve orgasm, so

164
00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:46,360
Speaker 1: let's just go ahead and get this over with. But

165
00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:50,360
Speaker 1: I wonder if men have the same the same reasoning

166
00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:52,760
Speaker 1: as far as not wanting to hurt someone's feelings. There

167
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:56,839
Speaker 1: is a gender difference um that Dr Mullenhard at the

168
00:10:56,880 --> 00:11:02,200
Speaker 1: University of Kansas uncovered between ends and women's rationale for

169
00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:06,640
Speaker 1: faking and orgasm. More women said that they wanted to

170
00:11:07,280 --> 00:11:11,800
Speaker 1: either avoid the negative consequence of having to explain why

171
00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:15,480
Speaker 1: they weren't able to finish um, or they wanted to

172
00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:18,439
Speaker 1: please their partners, So kind of from both angles, it's

173
00:11:18,440 --> 00:11:21,040
Speaker 1: a way of it's sort of a subservience to the

174
00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:23,880
Speaker 1: other person. Yeah, and going back to Aaron Cooper, who

175
00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:27,560
Speaker 1: you mentioned earlier, and altruistic deceit, you know, saving the

176
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:32,160
Speaker 1: person's feelings. UM. Aaron Cooper called it a relationship maintenance

177
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:37,079
Speaker 1: strategy and basically said that this leads into another study

178
00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:41,080
Speaker 1: called do women pretend orgasm to retain a mate? I

179
00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:43,959
Speaker 1: was not on board with a study from Todd Shackelford

180
00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:48,520
Speaker 1: and Dr Shackleford. If you're listening, no, nothing personal, but

181
00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:52,160
Speaker 1: I question your methodology. It felt like one of those

182
00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:55,800
Speaker 1: kind of self fulfilling prophecies that's set up like these

183
00:11:55,880 --> 00:12:03,000
Speaker 1: researchers basically went into this study assuming that via evolutionary biology,

184
00:12:03,120 --> 00:12:06,880
Speaker 1: that women who suspected their partner of cheating were more

185
00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:08,800
Speaker 1: likely to fake because it was it was a way

186
00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:13,400
Speaker 1: to manipulate a partner's commitment by signaling a mate selection.

187
00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:16,600
Speaker 1: Because it also goes back to this theory of female

188
00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:22,400
Speaker 1: orgasm existing as a way for um women to retain

189
00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:26,400
Speaker 1: sperm of fitter mates, so that you know, it's a

190
00:12:26,440 --> 00:12:28,360
Speaker 1: signal to guys that were like, hey, you know what

191
00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:31,559
Speaker 1: my body is into your body? That means you're amazing.

192
00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:35,080
Speaker 1: I'm boosting your ego right now. And uh so, so

193
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:39,559
Speaker 1: they pulled these women for how often they faked orgasms

194
00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:43,000
Speaker 1: and then they also asked about certain behaviors such as

195
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,520
Speaker 1: intentionally flirting in front of other guys to make their

196
00:12:45,559 --> 00:12:50,280
Speaker 1: partner jealous, or displaying jealous tendencies toward other women that

197
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:55,439
Speaker 1: there uh, their mates might interact with. And so they said, yes,

198
00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:59,599
Speaker 1: there is a correlation, and women be faking just to

199
00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:04,520
Speaker 1: keep their men around. Exactly. That's actually a quote from

200
00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,960
Speaker 1: the study. And really, I mean, if you think about it,

201
00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:10,280
Speaker 1: we have like listed out so many different reasons why

202
00:13:10,360 --> 00:13:12,480
Speaker 1: women might fake. It might be to keep a man.

203
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:14,440
Speaker 1: It might be to drive him away, it might be

204
00:13:14,679 --> 00:13:17,120
Speaker 1: to go to bed, it might be to stay awake

205
00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:19,440
Speaker 1: and cuddle. And I would just like to state my

206
00:13:19,559 --> 00:13:24,080
Speaker 1: favorite quote from this this Retain a mate study. Uh.

207
00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,000
Speaker 1: You know, we talked about how women are are faking

208
00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:30,720
Speaker 1: orgasms to to retain their mate and being like, you're sexy,

209
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:32,400
Speaker 1: so I'm going to fake it and look at how

210
00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:34,640
Speaker 1: sexy I am by making all these noises, So let's

211
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:40,360
Speaker 1: be sexy together. Um. Another reason is to prevent defection

212
00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:43,640
Speaker 1: from the relationship, which I think is a great way

213
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:47,360
Speaker 1: a great of course a scientist person would write that,

214
00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:51,880
Speaker 1: so instead of saying we broke up, just start saying, well, Uh,

215
00:13:54,080 --> 00:13:56,680
Speaker 1: she defected. Yeah. I think the next time that anything

216
00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:58,840
Speaker 1: like this happens to me, like a breakup or something,

217
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:02,120
Speaker 1: I think I'm going to say it's I'm not breaking

218
00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:05,920
Speaker 1: up with you, I am defecting. Defect from this relationship.

219
00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:11,520
Speaker 1: It sounds much more revolutionary like rod from the anyway.

220
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:15,160
Speaker 1: Moving on, Um, well, a lot of this research is

221
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:20,520
Speaker 1: focused on women, but we have not gotten to one

222
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:25,680
Speaker 1: of the most groundbreaking points of all this research, which

223
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:32,680
Speaker 1: is that guys, guess what, you're doing it too. Guys

224
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:35,720
Speaker 1: are doing it too, and not just a couple of

225
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:39,840
Speaker 1: fellas here and there no no going back to that

226
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:45,680
Speaker 1: University of Kansas study which was done specifically because Charlene L.

227
00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:51,800
Speaker 1: Mollenhard wanted to know whether or not men pretended orgasm,

228
00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:57,000
Speaker 1: and of the men surveyed said that yes, they had pretended,

229
00:14:57,280 --> 00:15:00,800
Speaker 1: and another in addition to that, another six teen percent

230
00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:06,000
Speaker 1: said that they had kenna sort of pretended, done something

231
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:10,160
Speaker 1: along the lines to to deceive their partner in terms

232
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:15,760
Speaker 1: of how much they were really enjoying the sexual activity. Um.

233
00:15:15,800 --> 00:15:18,520
Speaker 1: And there was one interesting difference that she found in

234
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:23,720
Speaker 1: the ways that men and women faked it. Uh, Carolin,

235
00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:26,560
Speaker 1: you mentioned, uh, you know, looking sexy and being all like,

236
00:15:26,680 --> 00:15:29,520
Speaker 1: oh wow, you know, going back to the when Harry

237
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:35,560
Speaker 1: met Sally, Oh wow. Women tend to fake by becoming

238
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:40,200
Speaker 1: a lot more vocal, whereas men tend to fake by

239
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:46,080
Speaker 1: clenching their muscles more and thrusting harder and then being like, Okay,

240
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:49,360
Speaker 1: I did it. I'm done, or just stopping. Some of

241
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:54,479
Speaker 1: the guys were like, well, I just I just stopped. Yeah,

242
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:57,680
Speaker 1: it's over now. And and some of the studies talked

243
00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:01,880
Speaker 1: about scripts for this kind of thing, relationship and sexual

244
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:05,120
Speaker 1: scripts for this kind of thing, and how, um, when

245
00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:07,840
Speaker 1: a man fakes it, or when a man orgasms real

246
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:12,320
Speaker 1: or fake, uh, that signifies that sex is over, whereas

247
00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:15,880
Speaker 1: if a woman fakes it, that signifies like okay, honey,

248
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:19,640
Speaker 1: you can go now, so that we can stop right um.

249
00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:22,840
Speaker 1: And I think it's also worth pointing out that a

250
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:30,120
Speaker 1: vast majority of this fakeery takes place during penile vaginal intercourse.

251
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:35,480
Speaker 1: Oral sex came in a quote distant second, So there's

252
00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:41,520
Speaker 1: something about intercourse that that that sets these crazy scripts

253
00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:46,720
Speaker 1: into play. And the script, the established script is that, uh,

254
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:50,320
Speaker 1: that the woman should orgasm first and then the man

255
00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:55,080
Speaker 1: should orgasm, because the male orgasm signals the end of

256
00:16:55,280 --> 00:17:00,160
Speaker 1: sex because in the physiological process of sexual intercourse some

257
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:04,840
Speaker 1: climax men go through a latency period after sex, whereas

258
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:08,199
Speaker 1: women can have multiple orgasms. And playing off of some

259
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:10,879
Speaker 1: of those differences you were talking about, UM, a study

260
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:14,919
Speaker 1: bisexual research team William Masters and Virginia Johnson found in

261
00:17:14,960 --> 00:17:18,080
Speaker 1: the lab. I wonder what kind of experiments these were

262
00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:21,359
Speaker 1: found in the lab that men took about four minutes

263
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,560
Speaker 1: to orgasm with their partner, while women took ten to

264
00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:28,640
Speaker 1: twenty minutes to orgasm with a partner. But when masturbating

265
00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:33,120
Speaker 1: women took about you guessed it four minutes. So there,

266
00:17:33,160 --> 00:17:39,040
Speaker 1: you're right, there is something about partnered sexual uh, penile

267
00:17:39,119 --> 00:17:42,320
Speaker 1: vaginal intercourse right because UM, and I don't have the

268
00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:47,320
Speaker 1: statistics in front of me, but women will report far

269
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:52,159
Speaker 1: higher prevalence of achieving an orgasm through clitoral stimulation versus

270
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:58,240
Speaker 1: achieving orgasm through vaginal stimulation exclusively a lot of women.

271
00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:02,840
Speaker 1: I think it's something around of women rarely will have

272
00:18:02,880 --> 00:18:08,640
Speaker 1: an orgasm just from vaginal intercourse. But there was all

273
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:11,359
Speaker 1: this brought up a question in my mind of whether

274
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 1: or not this is just an issue for heterosexual couples. UM,

275
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:19,920
Speaker 1: and while a majority of the research is done on

276
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:22,679
Speaker 1: on street women, there was a study that we found

277
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:26,720
Speaker 1: from the Journal of Sex Research in a little bit dated,

278
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:32,720
Speaker 1: and the researchers were investigating the differences in self reported

279
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:38,440
Speaker 1: sexual satisfaction among lesbians compared to straight women, and they

280
00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:42,720
Speaker 1: found that lo and behold, lesbian's report having sex more often,

281
00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:48,320
Speaker 1: feeling more sexually satisfied, and having orgasms uh more often

282
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:53,920
Speaker 1: than their straight counterparts. And so the researchers wondered if

283
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:57,400
Speaker 1: maybe this had to do with the type of sexual

284
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 1: simulation that is going on now. At the same time, UM,

285
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,440
Speaker 1: I also was doing a little little poken around on

286
00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:09,320
Speaker 1: the interwebs and landed on a column on AlterNet basically

287
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:13,920
Speaker 1: urging people to dispel the myth of the perfect lesbian

288
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,720
Speaker 1: sex because that only perpetuates this idea that all women

289
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:21,919
Speaker 1: function sexually the exact same way and that's not true.

290
00:19:22,359 --> 00:19:28,119
Speaker 1: Um But statistically lesbians do seem to have seem to

291
00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:30,080
Speaker 1: have a better, better time of it. But I wonder

292
00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:33,200
Speaker 1: if it's because they're breaking there, they're not operating within

293
00:19:33,359 --> 00:19:38,560
Speaker 1: that rigid heterosexual script. Could be they feel more free

294
00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:42,159
Speaker 1: to um do whatever feels good instead of just what

295
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,800
Speaker 1: they think their partner wants or what they think sex

296
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:48,040
Speaker 1: is supposed to be like. Um, Going back to Masters

297
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:51,480
Speaker 1: and Johnson, who you referenced, their research showed that same

298
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:55,480
Speaker 1: sex couples of both genders were more likely to take

299
00:19:55,560 --> 00:20:00,719
Speaker 1: their time, maybe because there's not some order in their head. Okay,

300
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:04,359
Speaker 1: well you go first, and then I'll go, and then

301
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:10,640
Speaker 1: we'll then we'll fall asleep. Yeah. Maybe So going back

302
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:14,240
Speaker 1: to the Journal of Sex Research from three uh, they

303
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:19,600
Speaker 1: cited some stats that of heterosexual women reported difficulty reaching

304
00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:23,720
Speaker 1: orgasm and fifteen percent reported inability to reach orgasm. And

305
00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:28,680
Speaker 1: this compares with percent of lesbians who reported difficulty reaching

306
00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:32,560
Speaker 1: orgasms and only seven percent of lesbians who reported inability

307
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:37,160
Speaker 1: to reach orgasm. So a big difference there, right, which

308
00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:40,399
Speaker 1: just makes me think of that the statistic of how

309
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:47,720
Speaker 1: piano vagual intercourse is usually far more correlated to fake

310
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 1: orgasms where both men and women compared to other forms

311
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:55,560
Speaker 1: of sexual contact. But the whole faking thing, I mean,

312
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:58,399
Speaker 1: it's it's a it's it's pretty fascinating that we that

313
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,800
Speaker 1: we would a lot of time when you read in

314
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:05,320
Speaker 1: women's publications about faking orgasms, it's urging us not to

315
00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:09,320
Speaker 1: because the bottom line is you might not need to

316
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:12,399
Speaker 1: fake it if your sexual communication is open and honest

317
00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:15,160
Speaker 1: and you're telling your partner you know what feels good

318
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:18,879
Speaker 1: and what you like, and hopefully that will help things.

319
00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 1: I mean the fact though, that people in that Masters

320
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 1: in Johnson study were able in a laboratory setting to

321
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:28,760
Speaker 1: the orgasm within ten minutes, it's pretty astounding to me.

322
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:31,480
Speaker 1: I wonder how they set the lab up, Like, did

323
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 1: they did they make it look like the Playboy Bunny?

324
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:38,960
Speaker 1: A lot of tea candles in sense, lots of pillows.

325
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:44,120
Speaker 1: It was the early sixties, so you know, beaded curtains, yeah,

326
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:47,040
Speaker 1: a lot of shag carpeting. And one more thing, just

327
00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:50,040
Speaker 1: bring it back to men, because we've talked about how yes,

328
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:53,760
Speaker 1: men do it, but we've spent a lot more time

329
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:56,480
Speaker 1: talking about women. And it reminds me of an article

330
00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:58,199
Speaker 1: that came out a couple of years ago in New

331
00:21:58,280 --> 00:22:03,560
Speaker 1: York Magazine talk about this phenomenon of men faking it

332
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:09,680
Speaker 1: and especially men using condoms as a tool of subversive

333
00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:14,680
Speaker 1: uh fakery. And one of the guys said, one of

334
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:17,399
Speaker 1: the men who was who was interviewed for the article says,

335
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:19,600
Speaker 1: as a guy your biggest fear is that you'll come

336
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:23,840
Speaker 1: too soon. And another man who has interviewed said that

337
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:27,000
Speaker 1: there was a double standard because men are expected to

338
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:30,520
Speaker 1: be the sex craze beast who can yes, achieve an

339
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:34,120
Speaker 1: orgasm within four minutes and even a laboratory of a setting,

340
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:41,840
Speaker 1: whereas women are almost assumed to take longer and maybe

341
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,880
Speaker 1: not even be able to reach orgasm at all. And

342
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 1: if we are, we might be faking it. So I

343
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:51,600
Speaker 1: can see how how some some fellows might might see

344
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:55,119
Speaker 1: a double standard there. But to all of this, I say,

345
00:22:56,720 --> 00:23:00,600
Speaker 1: maybe we should just use this as a lesson in

346
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:05,120
Speaker 1: why communication is so important. Yeah, I feel I mean,

347
00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:07,600
Speaker 1: tell your partner what's what works for you and what doesn't.

348
00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:09,639
Speaker 1: But also, if it's not going to happen, it's not

349
00:23:09,640 --> 00:23:13,119
Speaker 1: going to happen. And yes, there is the fear that

350
00:23:13,119 --> 00:23:15,760
Speaker 1: you might hurt someone's feelings or someone might feel guilty

351
00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,760
Speaker 1: or insulted or whatever. But yeah, I think opening those

352
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:24,320
Speaker 1: channels of communication my lesson the need to fake it right,

353
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:28,480
Speaker 1: Because if you look at psychological studies of couples who

354
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 1: are complaining of having disappointing sex lives, a lot of

355
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:38,120
Speaker 1: times it traces back to their level of sexual communication

356
00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:42,200
Speaker 1: if there's a dip in the activity. A lot of

357
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:47,080
Speaker 1: times there's been a dip in or non existence of communication.

358
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:50,840
Speaker 1: And I mean, communication is not an easy thing, but

359
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,560
Speaker 1: it's something to keep in mind. And can I can

360
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:57,479
Speaker 1: I toss that one last fun finding it's only if

361
00:23:57,520 --> 00:24:00,959
Speaker 1: it's fun, it's pretty fun, um and I have tweeted

362
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:04,280
Speaker 1: about this, so Twitter followers, you're already in the know.

363
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,000
Speaker 1: But there was a two thousand and ten study from

364
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:11,560
Speaker 1: Emory University looking at the economics of faking it, and

365
00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:16,679
Speaker 1: they found that a funny correlation between education levels and

366
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:20,120
Speaker 1: uh faking orgasm and found that people who are more

367
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:24,399
Speaker 1: highly educated tend to fake it because quote, love making

368
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:28,640
Speaker 1: takes time and people and people with more education may

369
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:32,040
Speaker 1: have a higher opportunity cost of time and may therefore

370
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,640
Speaker 1: be more likely to fake just to get it over with.

371
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,159
Speaker 1: Perhaps this is a quote, perhaps so they can return

372
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 1: to writing papers. So doctoral students out there, we are

373
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:48,120
Speaker 1: onto you interesting now. I mean the study really had

374
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:52,960
Speaker 1: like whole giant formulas with symbols and things division signs.

375
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 1: I don't know. Uh So now that we have bombard

376
00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 1: you with statistics and theories about who is faking it

377
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:05,399
Speaker 1: and why you know what we're gonna ask for your stories.

378
00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:08,960
Speaker 1: Don't be ashamed. Yeah, Also, don't be too dirty. We

379
00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 1: can't read them on the air if they're too dirty,

380
00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:13,480
Speaker 1: right And uh, you know, or if someone out there

381
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:17,480
Speaker 1: who has never faked it before, let us let us know.

382
00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 1: Or you just said in an incredible communicator yeah, oh,

383
00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:23,960
Speaker 1: another group of people I would like to hear from.

384
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:25,960
Speaker 1: Some of these studies talked about people who fake it

385
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:31,399
Speaker 1: intersect with women who have report never having had an orgasm.

386
00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:35,200
Speaker 1: And so if we have any people out there who

387
00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:38,680
Speaker 1: have never had an orgasm, they've they've tried, but maybe

388
00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:41,520
Speaker 1: just have never gotten there. Do you fake it? Yea.

389
00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:45,520
Speaker 1: For that reason, let us know mom stuff at Discovery

390
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:49,159
Speaker 1: dot com. And you can also head over to Facebook.

391
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:52,560
Speaker 1: But again, please keep our Facebook walk clean. Uh. And

392
00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:56,280
Speaker 1: in the meantime, we've got a couple of emails here.

393
00:25:56,320 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: I have one in response to our long ago episode

394
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:04,199
Speaker 1: about female scientists, and I really wanted to share this

395
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,480
Speaker 1: one because it is from Chloe, who is a PhD

396
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:10,040
Speaker 1: student in chemistry at one of the top research institutions

397
00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:12,919
Speaker 1: in the US, and she writes, first of all, I

398
00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:16,200
Speaker 1: think people should understand that STEM females may make a

399
00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,679
Speaker 1: little more money, but it's also the result of an

400
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:22,040
Speaker 1: additional five to ten years, ten to fourteen hour days

401
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:26,280
Speaker 1: six days a week of additional experience post post bachelor degree.

402
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:28,400
Speaker 1: I think this is something important that should be considered

403
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:33,199
Speaker 1: before convincing people to pursue careers in STEM. Secondly, I

404
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:36,119
Speaker 1: think your lack of role models explains explains the gender

405
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 1: gap very well, but it's not because there aren't lack

406
00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 1: of successful female scientists. There are plenty of these very successful,

407
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 1: intelligent scientists, but that doesn't translate to an individual we

408
00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,919
Speaker 1: can look up to. I have a female advisor, and

409
00:26:48,920 --> 00:26:51,760
Speaker 1: while she is a successful scientist, she has to nanny's

410
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,480
Speaker 1: on rotation, travels at least a week out of the month,

411
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 1: and makes it clear that family is not high on

412
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,280
Speaker 1: our list of priorities. The sad part is this is

413
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 1: an uncommon Many women my age and their late twenties

414
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:06,040
Speaker 1: scientists or not want a family. However, it's very difficult

415
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 1: to find a role model who can show us how

416
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:11,400
Speaker 1: to balance family life, their love for science, their careers,

417
00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 1: and also show compassion toward others. I think this is

418
00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: often the case that successful scientists might lack the more

419
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:20,880
Speaker 1: quote unquote human side of things that many women consider

420
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 1: to be important. This is why I and many of

421
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,679
Speaker 1: my friends are not pursuing This is why I and

422
00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:30,280
Speaker 1: many of my friends are not continuing to pursue traditional

423
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:34,080
Speaker 1: academic careers. So some great insight from Chloe, Thank you.

424
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:37,359
Speaker 1: We have some more insight from Jessica. This is about

425
00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:42,240
Speaker 1: our friendship podcasts plural. She says that she's in somewhat

426
00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 1: unique of a position of being best friends with a

427
00:27:44,600 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 1: male and female romantic couple. Through an odd but not

428
00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,000
Speaker 1: uncomfortable set of circumstances. We have ended up sharing a

429
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: two bedroom apartment here in Korea along with their two cats,

430
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 1: also a male and a female. The difference in our

431
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 1: friendship pretty clearly exemplifies the differences you mentioned between male

432
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 1: and female roommate. With my female best friend, I share

433
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:04,960
Speaker 1: a very caring, warm bond. I call her when I'm

434
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:07,400
Speaker 1: upset about something, and she is the one who keeps

435
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,359
Speaker 1: up with me when I'm out of town. We know

436
00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 1: just about all of the intimate details of each other's lives,

437
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:15,040
Speaker 1: from my dating foibles to her relationship with her parents,

438
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:18,000
Speaker 1: her boyfriend, my male best friend loves and cares about me,

439
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:21,199
Speaker 1: but expresses this through wanting to spend time with me

440
00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:24,080
Speaker 1: and watching funny movies are making jokes together. We rarely

441
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:25,920
Speaker 1: talk about our emotions, and when I gave him a

442
00:28:25,960 --> 00:28:28,560
Speaker 1: hug the other day at his receiving some bad news,

443
00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:31,479
Speaker 1: it was probably the first time we touched affectionately in months.

444
00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:34,119
Speaker 1: They're very different friendships, and having them both is a

445
00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:36,359
Speaker 1: complimentary force that needs I don't have to search for

446
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 1: someone to share brunch or a movie. And thanks to

447
00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:43,320
Speaker 1: everybody who's written in again. Our email addressed is mom

448
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:46,200
Speaker 1: Stuff at Discovery dot com, but of course you can

449
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,320
Speaker 1: also head over to our Facebook page and send us

450
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 1: a tweet. We're at Mom's Stuff podcast. And if you

451
00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 1: want to know more about orgasms, both fake and not,

452
00:28:56,200 --> 00:29:00,000
Speaker 1: you can read How Orgasms Work by me written by

453
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 1: me How Stuff Works dot com. Be sure to check

454
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 1: out our new video podcast, Stuff from the Future. Join

455
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 1: how Stuff Work staff as we explore the most promising

456
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 1: and perplexing possibilities of tomorrow. The How stepp Works iPhone

457
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:24,600
Speaker 1: app has a arrivee dewlmoad it today on iTunes, Brought

458
00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 1: to you by the reinvented two thousand, twelve camera. It's ready.

459
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 1: Are you