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Speaker 1: Wind Down and Podcast. All right, welcome to another podcast

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Speaker 1: of Winddown with Michael Coston and Janna Kramer. I'm sorry,

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Speaker 1: Janna Kramer and Michael Cosson. We're never going to get

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Speaker 1: a good entrance to the show. No, probably not, but

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Speaker 1: that's okay. How's Quarantine life for you? Bed, Same old,

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Speaker 1: same old, And that's our show. So we'll see you

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Speaker 1: next week. No, we've been full of just this past

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Speaker 1: week we've been crazy productive. We really have painting rooms

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Speaker 1: doing stuff, doing stuff. We painted them the office, we

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Speaker 1: painted the barroom. Speaking of the office, we have Kate

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Speaker 1: Flannery on today, who is buried in the hit sitcom

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Speaker 1: The Office, which is probably my top two, probably my

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Speaker 1: number one actually of all times to your second one

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Speaker 1: side felt that's up there. Yeah, what's number two? But

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Speaker 1: that's sitcoms. But then you have shows like you know,

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Speaker 1: what's number two, probably Signild, what What's on? What's Teetering on? Three?

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Speaker 1: Then Caribbean Enthusiasm, which is all this is all like

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Speaker 1: the same kind of stuff, yeah, which and then you

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Speaker 1: have you know, shows like The Wire yet Dexter, you

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Speaker 1: got Game of Thrones, you got all that kind of stuff.

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Speaker 1: But anyways, um, I'm I'm really excited to talk to

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Speaker 1: her because I know her from Dancing with Stars. Hey,

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Speaker 1: were you guys in the same season? No, she was

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Speaker 1: just on this last season. Yeah. Um. But you know,

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Speaker 1: I've never watched an episode of the Office, so I

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Speaker 1: feel like this podcast should just be like it's the

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Speaker 1: Mic and Cake Show featuring Jana I. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I just I love um Steve carl I feel like

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Speaker 1: I need to see I think the problem was I

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Speaker 1: would You'd be watching it and I would just come

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Speaker 1: in and see a few seconds of it, and you'd

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Speaker 1: be like laughing, and I would look at and go,

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Speaker 1: that's funny. I don't understand. You gotta understand. You gotta

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Speaker 1: understand the characters, the stories. But I but I like

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Speaker 1: love Seinfeld. I feel like you can watch Seinfeld and

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Speaker 1: laugh at anything. Well, the Office is the same way

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Speaker 1: if you have seen it before. So like Comedy Central

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Speaker 1: always has the Office in rotation like constantly, so I

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Speaker 1: could turn on that at any moment. It could be

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Speaker 1: any episode. I don't know exactly what's going on, and

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Speaker 1: I'll laugh like I would like I did the first time.

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Speaker 1: That's awesome. See. Maybe because I really love Kate, and

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Speaker 1: I'm excited to talk to her, especially because I heard

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Speaker 1: that she while she was filming The Office, she was

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Speaker 1: a waitress. Still, like, I love that. I just think

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Speaker 1: that's so cool. I wonder if was it a dream

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Speaker 1: or was I wanting to do a waitress job last year?

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Speaker 1: Did I dream that? Definitely didn't tell me that. See,

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Speaker 1: I miss waitressing, like I would still do it right now.

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Speaker 1: I would for fun. I mean, if I have kids,

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Speaker 1: I probably would. I enjoy it. I love waitressing until

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Speaker 1: you didn't and then you quit. No, I love it.

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Speaker 1: I would do it, I seriously, I think if I could.

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Speaker 1: I just I don't know. I love being able to

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Speaker 1: help people and making their experience great for sure. But

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Speaker 1: maybe it's so crazy. But maybe I had a dream

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Speaker 1: about that. But I had a dream that I was

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Speaker 1: applying somewhere for waitressing shop. I swear, what kind of

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Speaker 1: restaurant would you waitress? It's a good question because I've

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Speaker 1: done all of them. I've done Joe's Crap Chat, I've

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Speaker 1: done Fridays, I've done Applebee's, I've done Greek Island. I've

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Speaker 1: done you know, I've literally done every but the only

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Speaker 1: ones I haven't done were the real highst like the

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Speaker 1: upper like the one we went to a love in Park,

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Speaker 1: Matt whatever, Madison Park. I don't think I would want

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Speaker 1: to do that kind of restaurant. I was just gonna say,

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Speaker 1: you know, you couldn't. I couldn't. It's too stuffy. Well

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Speaker 1: and would you like you Kevin, Like I couldn't even

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Speaker 1: take it serious? You shoot from the hip too much.

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Speaker 1: Where if you went to a restaurant like that, next thing,

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Speaker 1: you know you back, don't get that because that's just

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Speaker 1: can disgusting, like that's how you'd beat I mean, I'm

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Speaker 1: just really honest, Like when people came to the wood

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Speaker 1: Ranch girl and uh what in l A when I

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Speaker 1: used to waitress there, and yes it's a one by

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Speaker 1: the grove. And funny story, I was stealing toilet paper

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Speaker 1: before COVID nineteen. Me and Diana were so poor in

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Speaker 1: our electricity went off and we were stealing paper toilet

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Speaker 1: paper from wood Ranch because we didn't I wouldn't have

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Speaker 1: enough money to buy like toilet paper. Um. But then

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Speaker 1: I booked night and then I quit, Gee what you

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Speaker 1: gotta do? Um? But yeah, no, anyways, but no, I

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Speaker 1: would have to be It would have to be a

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Speaker 1: chill place like that, and I wouldn't want to go

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Speaker 1: back to. I didn't like being a bar girl. I

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Speaker 1: hated that because I'm not the bar chick there, like

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Speaker 1: here's a shot and I'm like, yeah, babe, and then

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Speaker 1: I like throw it away. Anyways, Well, I do feel

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Speaker 1: I have a lot of empathy for those people in

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Speaker 1: that profession right now because of everything going on, and

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Speaker 1: that must that must really suck. And I hope, you know,

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Speaker 1: they're able to find some work somewhere and and everything.

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Speaker 1: And I hope people that have lost their jobs are

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Speaker 1: able to do something to take care of themselves. And

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Speaker 1: you know, I seldom do I read comments, or do

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Speaker 1: we read comments about this podcast or anything really that

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Speaker 1: we post, but I saw one recently when we were

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Speaker 1: talking about the quarantine sen and someone was kind of

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Speaker 1: going off on us about, uh, we're being insensitive or

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Speaker 1: something about giving people crap being out and about wait,

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Speaker 1: we were insensitive about what we were. You know, we

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Speaker 1: were just second being insensitive about people, you know, being

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Speaker 1: out in public, and we're like, stay at home, don't

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Speaker 1: go out. But just like anything, you have to take

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Speaker 1: it with. It's all in context. You have to take

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Speaker 1: it with a grain of salt. We're not saying everyone

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Speaker 1: should stay in their house and not leave at all.

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Speaker 1: We understand people have to make a living, you know,

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Speaker 1: we are if you're an essential worker and you have

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Speaker 1: to or you have to make a living, you have

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Speaker 1: to make the money. You know. We're not saying people

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Speaker 1: that everyone should stay home, and I'm not I'm not

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Speaker 1: trying to defend what we're saying. I'm just trying to

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Speaker 1: make it clear just so people put it in perspective that, yes,

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Speaker 1: we we appreciate the fact that we've been blessing. We're

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Speaker 1: in a fortunate situation where we can work from um

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Speaker 1: um and we're doing okay right now. But we totally

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Speaker 1: understand the grind of if you have to work, you

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Speaker 1: have to work. If you have to make money, you

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Speaker 1: have to make money. You gotta do what you gotta

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Speaker 1: do to provide for yourself and your family and stay safe.

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Speaker 1: So if you've got to leave the house, do it.

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Speaker 1: But it's all about what we're talking about. Are there's

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Speaker 1: people that we hear about or see that are out

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Speaker 1: and goofing around or maybe they don't have to be out,

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Speaker 1: or you know, abusing the system right now because they

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Speaker 1: are naive about the situation. That's all we're saying. I

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Speaker 1: just think again, just everything's got to be taken into

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Speaker 1: the right perspective. And now I'm reading comments downloaded a

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Speaker 1: month ago and cannot get through even one episode due

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Speaker 1: to how vapid and shallow jan it was. I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: Do you think that it's like mean tweets? You know,

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Speaker 1: so toxic? Oh well, it's all, It's all good. Everyone

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Speaker 1: can have their opinions. I just I just don't want

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Speaker 1: people are actual fans listening to this if they are

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Speaker 1: in that situation. I didn't want them to be felt

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Speaker 1: like I selated from from what we're saying. I didn't

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Speaker 1: want them to take it the incorrect way. I don't

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Speaker 1: care the person that wrote the comment, who gives it,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, so people that care about the show and

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Speaker 1: that we care about So I'm sorry, I have to

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Speaker 1: say almost zanex quen Mike said, Janna thrives in chaos. Seriously,

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Speaker 1: Janna can't even function on a daily basis unless she's medicated.

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Speaker 1: What or she freaks out, wines, cries, and flat out

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Speaker 1: has panic attacks if she thinks the wind is blowing

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Speaker 1: in the wrong direction. She thrives on zanex more like it. Um,

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Speaker 1: I don't take zanex. So wow, that's kind of funny

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Speaker 1: because it's just so ridiculous. People are crazy, I know whatever,

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Speaker 1: um it is what it is. I feel like the

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Speaker 1: ones people I do listen they are getting something out

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Speaker 1: of it. Yeah, it's either the train wreck you love

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Speaker 1: to listen to or oh that's why you look at

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Speaker 1: reviews almost for anything, and it's either five stars or

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Speaker 1: one star. Like there's very seldom are people because this

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Speaker 1: is like anything right subjective. People can have their opinion.

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Speaker 1: It's I'm sure there's some episodes where people who are

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Speaker 1: even a fan of the show are kind of like,

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Speaker 1: it wasn't my favorite one, but hopefully the next week

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Speaker 1: or the week before was great for them. But most

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Speaker 1: of the time, this is just like a movie. It's

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Speaker 1: just like a you know, music genre. It's just like

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Speaker 1: anything you like, what you like, and if it's in

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Speaker 1: the middle of that, people aren't gonna or if you

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Speaker 1: just listen to one episode like someone goes, you know,

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Speaker 1: Janna left at Mike for not hustling. It's like we're

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Speaker 1: we crack on each other, you know. But anyways, um,

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Speaker 1: I feel like at the end of the day. Hopefully

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Speaker 1: we're helping people too with some of our situations. We

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Speaker 1: we air our dirty laundry to help other people. M hm.

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Speaker 1: You know, although the other day though, in therapy, it's

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Speaker 1: not great to have therapy sessions in quarantine. Yeah, it's

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Speaker 1: hard when you're on zoom and there's a way out. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're having therapy last week and I thought it was

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Speaker 1: a great therapy session. There was ten minutes and you know,

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Speaker 1: it was like a therapist was like, so, what are

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Speaker 1: ways that y'all can connect together? And how that got

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Speaker 1: us into an argument? Shocking um, But you know, within

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Speaker 1: those two minutes and Mike gets up, gets up and

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Speaker 1: storms out, and and the therapist is like, this is

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Speaker 1: why I hate doing these kind of sessions because now

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Speaker 1: you're just stuck in the house and what do you say,

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Speaker 1: Is he coming back? You're like nope, Yeah, He's like,

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Speaker 1: is he gonna come back? I was like, now he's done,

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Speaker 1: He's done, And he goes, well, how is this gonna

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Speaker 1: How is this going to resolve? I was like, well,

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Speaker 1: one or two things. He's either gonna be in a

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Speaker 1: hole the rest of the day and you know, puff

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Speaker 1: his chest out and whatever or hell, apologize for being

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Speaker 1: defensive and then we'll talk it out. And it was

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Speaker 1: the ladder. I know, it was kind of cool, super cool,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, I was like, but no, he's done and

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go now and gray, but I went for it.

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Speaker 1: Came back from a walk and I even said to

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Speaker 1: my girlfriends, I was like, up here it is. It's

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Speaker 1: either going to be good and rest of the day.

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Speaker 1: We're a bad rest of the day. Did they text

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Speaker 1: you and ask you later? Um? Now, I mean you

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Speaker 1: were like out with the kids and playing so killing

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Speaker 1: the game, riding the scooter. But yeah, all right, well

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Speaker 1: let's take a break and we'll come back and warm

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Speaker 1: things up for to have Kate Flannery on. So what

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Speaker 1: was your favorite episode of Office before we get her on?

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Speaker 1: Because I just want to get some Office knowledge. You

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Speaker 1: can't there's not one anyone will say. When season nine,

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Speaker 1: when Dwight and Angela are going to get married, it's

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Speaker 1: like the one of the last episodes of the whole series,

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Speaker 1: is she married in it? No? No, she's a train wreck, alcoholic.

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Speaker 1: It's like two kids. I think, drives a minivan. She's

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Speaker 1: an animal. She's awesome. So Anyways, this episode at the

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Speaker 1: end is when Michael Scott comes back and at the

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Speaker 1: perfect timing he pulls out of That's what she said,

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Speaker 1: with like tears in his eyes. And it's just like

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Speaker 1: that when you were crying on the plane that Yeah,

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Speaker 1: actually no, I think that was when he married Holly.

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Speaker 1: I look over, I was like, are you crying? That

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Speaker 1: the best watching the office telling you man, you get invested.

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Speaker 1: Let me ask you this because I was thinking this

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Speaker 1: before the break because someone asked Kate this as well.

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Speaker 1: But when someone's on a show, such a popular show

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Speaker 1: that has this following, that's just timeless. As you were

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Speaker 1: two on One Tree Hill and how big that still is.

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Speaker 1: Do you ever get tired talking about it? Really? Because

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Speaker 1: it's the show that made you the golf forever. Be

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Speaker 1: so grateful for One Tree Hill. And I love meeting

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Speaker 1: New Tree Hill or fans. I love it. I'll talk

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Speaker 1: to them blue in the face about One Tree Hill.

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Speaker 1: I love it. It's good to know because I feel bad,

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Speaker 1: you know now being in this kind of position we

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Speaker 1: interview people and have those discussions. It's you and I

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Speaker 1: have both know what it's like to be on the

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Speaker 1: receiving end and get the same questions about certain things

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Speaker 1: and just have to talk about it until you're blue

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Speaker 1: in the face. But it's good. It's refreshing to know

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Speaker 1: that when it comes to something like that career wise,

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Speaker 1: that you have that appreciation and respect for that. Now

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Speaker 1: here's the the other side of it. If I was

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Speaker 1: on a show that I was actually the entire like

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Speaker 1: I was only blessed, I mean not blessed, like I

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Speaker 1: only did three seasons. So if I did nine seasons

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Speaker 1: of it, or if I did, I mean, let's say

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Speaker 1: I was. I mean, for example, are our buddy Bob Sagett,

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Speaker 1: you know Danny Tanner, I mean Heenan said he's not

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Speaker 1: sick of talking about tree, I mean a full house.

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Speaker 1: But at the same time, if you're type cast and

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Speaker 1: they were all that is what it would that's where

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Speaker 1: it would get hard because it's like they only see

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Speaker 1: him or you know, for quite a long time as

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Speaker 1: Danny Tanner, Like that's why, um, what's his face? Uncle

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Speaker 1: Jesse wanted to do anything but Uncle Jesse, and he

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Speaker 1: started to do like these really dark dramas and murder

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Speaker 1: because he just wanted to be so out of it.

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Speaker 1: But no one believed that, you know, So I think

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Speaker 1: that is the only that's but I feel like people

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Speaker 1: like Steve Carrell don't have that issue because they're already

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Speaker 1: so yeah, but I think even someone like Steve Carrell,

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Speaker 1: who yes, we see now how first he is in

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Speaker 1: his ability to act, but at the beginning, it was

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Speaker 1: all comedic stuff. It was isn't like Michael Shannon too,

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Speaker 1: which were we just watching with Waco Who's wasn't he

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Speaker 1: comedy to not really know? Um? But you know, he

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Speaker 1: was four year old virgin and those kind of an

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Speaker 1: anchorman and all that kind of stuff. He was like

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Speaker 1: the sidekick, funny random guy, um the Office. I mean,

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Speaker 1: he took that over, but still it's mostly comedy. And

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Speaker 1: you know, but now you see him on things with

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Speaker 1: uh the Morning show him. No, I'm saying he before

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Speaker 1: he was just kind of this side part like co star,

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Speaker 1: but he was the star of the office and like

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Speaker 1: owned it, like took it over as and like delivered

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Speaker 1: every day. Um. But yeah, no, that's refreshing to know.

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Speaker 1: And I but even when we talked to Bob before,

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Speaker 1: you know, he even said he went through a transition

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Speaker 1: where he was sick of it, sick of being known

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Speaker 1: as as Danny Tanner and like always being like you said,

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Speaker 1: type casted in that and then he kind of later

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Speaker 1: on realized and appreciated it all over again, especially because

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Speaker 1: of all these streaming services and gainey new fans like

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Speaker 1: you said you are you're talking to new Tree Hillers,

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Speaker 1: and the fact that there's teenagers that are becoming true

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Speaker 1: Tree Hill fans right now because of streaming services is amazing. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: for sure, interesting, But yeah, I wonder, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I'm excited and I'm excited. Talked her too. She she's

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Speaker 1: one of seven children, which means she's a hustler um,

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Speaker 1: and yeah, I'm excited to get her on to take

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Speaker 1: one my break before we have her colin, let's do it, Okay,

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Speaker 1: all right to rive Katey, Hey good, how are you?

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I just want to can I start?

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Speaker 1: I loved watching you and dancing with the stars. Thank you?

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Speaker 1: So you're so sweet. Oh my gosh. I literally just

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Speaker 1: got a text from Pasha, my partner. He's not he's

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Speaker 1: in um Staten Island with this with his wife and family.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, I mean you did. I I was

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Speaker 1: just because Michael is like the biggest office fan that

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Speaker 1: has ever lived. Um and and I you know, I

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Speaker 1: I love you from Dancing with the Stars, and I

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Speaker 1: was just like you were not only um, you you

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Speaker 1: were just how do I say it, Like you were

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Speaker 1: beautiful but yet you were relatable and you but yet

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Speaker 1: you were funny like you were you had all of

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Speaker 1: it together and just like an amazing package. Like I

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Speaker 1: one thousand percent, I think you should have won. Like

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Speaker 1: you were amazing and you were relatable, and I just

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Speaker 1: I loved watching you like you made me happy every

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Speaker 1: time you danced. So that's so I really appreciate that

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Speaker 1: I was. It was a really unexpected process for me.

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Speaker 1: I didn't expect to enjoy it as much. I didn't

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Speaker 1: like the judging. But other than that, you know, I

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Speaker 1: didn't I didn't like that part either. Geta balls, you know, sorry,

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Speaker 1: I get a little meretith when I talk about the judges.

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Speaker 1: But like, you know, you know, I know me and

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Speaker 1: me and Julianne went at it like one time, but

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Speaker 1: you know it happens because it's just like you put

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Speaker 1: so much work into it. It's like you know, you're

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Speaker 1: not a dancer, but you sure as heck fuled me

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Speaker 1: and I thought I loved it. So I had a

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Speaker 1: great teacher. Seriously, Pasha is a great teacher, and I

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Speaker 1: thought he was a great addition to the show. And

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Speaker 1: I actually did. I did a bunch of the tour.

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Speaker 1: I just got off the road with the Dancing with

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Speaker 1: the Stars tour, which is crazy. I did um forty

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Speaker 1: three shows. I supposed to do fifty four but we

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Speaker 1: got pulled off early. But it was intense, I gotta

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Speaker 1: tell you, I literally, I mean it's a lot. We

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Speaker 1: were you know, we played Radio City and gosh, that's

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Speaker 1: so cool. You're on Rocket rollbus. I mean I got

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Speaker 1: the bedroom, so I felt a little twanky, but it

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Speaker 1: was so tough. You got the star room in the back,

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Speaker 1: and like if you call it that, yes, all the

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Speaker 1: beer cans came rolling back to my I love all right,

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Speaker 1: Michael go you know, first of all, I mean, I

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Speaker 1: have a million questions, but I'll start slow. I was

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Speaker 1: asking Janna this because Jenna was on a on a

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Speaker 1: TV show that ran for a long time, One Tree Hill,

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Speaker 1: and has this cult following and stuff, and obviously the

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Speaker 1: office does. And always wonder if people who have had

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Speaker 1: the level of success on the singular show like you have.

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Speaker 1: Do you ever get tired talking about it? I don't

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Speaker 1: you know why I had such It was such a

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Speaker 1: great experience, and I feel like the love that people

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Speaker 1: have for it is so intense and like they're so

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Speaker 1: invested that I don't. I mean, I always wondered, like,

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Speaker 1: what's I mean? And maybe it's just luck. But the

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Speaker 1: writing was so amazing that even if I didn't speak

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Speaker 1: for days when we were shooting, I didn't care. It

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Speaker 1: was hysterical, like it was so smart, and I just

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Speaker 1: felt like, you know, I'm just so proud of it.

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Speaker 1: I love that people are like consuming it, like they're

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Speaker 1: breathing it is sleeping and breathing it like they can't

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Speaker 1: turn it off. But it's crazy. I heard a rumor

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Speaker 1: you were still waitressing during the show first season. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I kept my restaurant job because I wasn't sure if

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Speaker 1: it was going to get picked up. We had all season,

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Speaker 1: just six episodes for the first season, so I literally

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Speaker 1: covered my shift store in the weekend. I worked my

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Speaker 1: said they runched, Oh my gosh, and it started air

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Speaker 1: and and one customer said to me, excuse me, did

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Speaker 1: you just get a HYS direct to me? And I

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Speaker 1: was like, what, what the hell? No, actually, no, no,

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Speaker 1: actually I messed it up. They said, aren't you lactose

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Speaker 1: intolerant and I said, uh, well, thanks, yes, and thanks

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Speaker 1: for not bringing up my hys directed me that the

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Speaker 1: Alliance it's so weird. I mean, you know, it's so crazy.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, but yeah, it was. It was so

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Speaker 1: so strong, and then like you know, and then it

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Speaker 1: clearly became clear that the show was going to move

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Speaker 1: forward and ever since, like Steve, you know, Steve came

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Speaker 1: out with forty year old Virgin. The signs were up

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Speaker 1: before we started season two and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: this could be really big, so you know, and then

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Speaker 1: when when that came out, it was like everyone just

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Speaker 1: you know, wanted more because Steve is such a He's amazing.

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Speaker 1: He's really I mean, I feel like we wrote on

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Speaker 1: his coattails in such a great way for such a

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Speaker 1: long time. Yes and no, at the same as a fan,

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Speaker 1: I just yeah, I mean Steve was amazing. I mean,

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Speaker 1: he carried such a heavy load on that show and

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Speaker 1: just delivered every time. But I think to your point,

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Speaker 1: the writing was so great where I felt like they

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Speaker 1: equally included everyone in that cast from you to Kevin too.

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Speaker 1: I mean, everybody like had their storylines. You knew so

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Speaker 1: much about every character where they wrote it in. It

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Speaker 1: was just like, and you know, Jane was making fun

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Speaker 1: of me. Were later in the seasons, I'm like, we're traveling,

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Speaker 1: I'm like crying to the office. She's like, what in

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Speaker 1: this a comedy? While you cry? I was like, you

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Speaker 1: don't know the whole backstory and it's just everywhere else.

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Speaker 1: So there's so much hard I thought. The Jim Pan

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Speaker 1: thing was always like, especially in the beginning, was so heartbreaking.

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Speaker 1: It would make me upset. As we were in the

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Speaker 1: writer's room, like just reading, like you know, reading each episode,

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Speaker 1: doing the table read. I'll be like, no, I'd be

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Speaker 1: so bummed when they'd almost get together. They're like, you know,

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Speaker 1: it was just so painful. Do you have I mean,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure you have a million any specific memory from

395
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Speaker 1: that show that you're like, this was just that special

396
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Speaker 1: day or that special episode for you personally. Well, you know,

397
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Speaker 1: it's funny. I feel like Michael's last Dundees were amazing

398
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Speaker 1: for a number of reasons because that was the Walk

399
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Speaker 1: of Shame when Diego and Michael Scott come to Meredith's house.

400
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Speaker 1: She's coming in for the night before. That was the

401
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Speaker 1: first and the only time we got to see nervous House.

402
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Speaker 1: So I just love the whole exchange. I thought it

403
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Speaker 1: was just I just like the whole less is more thing.

404
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Speaker 1: And I love that they never gave up on that,

405
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Speaker 1: because sometimes when seasons continue with shows, characters sort of

406
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Speaker 1: morph and they kind of start talking too much and

407
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Speaker 1: they get some of the exposition and they sort of

408
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Speaker 1: lose what was funny about them. I love that the

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Speaker 1: writers never ruined Meredith. They didn't, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, even if I had like a lot

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Speaker 1: to do in one episode, like Lis or something, I

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Speaker 1: still felt like, Okay, that's okay, that's enough, Okay, we

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Speaker 1: can we can go back. You know, I never because

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Speaker 1: I know a lot of actors, like they like to

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Speaker 1: count lines and they get a little insecure. And I

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Speaker 1: was nervous at first, but only because I thought I

417
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Speaker 1: was going to get fired when when like if my

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Speaker 1: storyline got cut. But then I realized, like I realized

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Speaker 1: there was this great chess game going on, and just

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Speaker 1: let them, you know, let the writers, let the producers

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Speaker 1: play this game like they're doing a great job. Don't

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Speaker 1: mess it up by being an actor with a complaint,

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Speaker 1: for sure. But when I appreciate your performance is because

424
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:18,680
Speaker 1: the yeah, the writers can write all this good stuff.

425
00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:21,600
Speaker 1: I feel like you're The physical comedy you brought to

426
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:25,159
Speaker 1: your character was very underrated. And you know in scenes

427
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:28,399
Speaker 1: like when you're being dragged into rehab from Dwight, putting

428
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:31,000
Speaker 1: the back of your head with the bat like everything,

429
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:35,119
Speaker 1: it's just like your mannerisms. That was why the writing

430
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,160
Speaker 1: was funny, is because you made it funny through your

431
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:40,720
Speaker 1: delivery and the physical nature of your Because sometimes my

432
00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:43,160
Speaker 1: lines will get cut because basically they would say, like, well,

433
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:45,119
Speaker 1: your face sort of said what your line was, And

434
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,840
Speaker 1: I was like, I get that. You know, we don't

435
00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:49,840
Speaker 1: need the words. If you sort of see my expression,

436
00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:51,960
Speaker 1: you kind of get it right. You know, it's funny.

437
00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:54,679
Speaker 1: Um There's the other scenes that I really really loved

438
00:23:54,720 --> 00:24:01,440
Speaker 1: were um uh when when um uh Michael Scott proposed

439
00:24:01,480 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 1: to Holly and then the sprinklers went off because he

440
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,679
Speaker 1: lived too many It was so great to be a

441
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:08,760
Speaker 1: part of, Like I just felt like, oh my gosh,

442
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,119
Speaker 1: that whole like the departure of Michael Scott was so

443
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:13,439
Speaker 1: emotional for all of us, and me in particular, and

444
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:15,359
Speaker 1: my boyfriend. I met my boyfriend on the show of

445
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:19,240
Speaker 1: the Office, and he because he's the still photographer for NBC,

446
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,199
Speaker 1: so he was working time to time, so like he

447
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,120
Speaker 1: would be in the fake men's room a lot. That's

448
00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 1: where I'd meet him. Like, yeah, so he was in

449
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,560
Speaker 1: the fake men's room the whole time when Holly's coming

450
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,919
Speaker 1: through and we have the can't like we're lined up

451
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:36,359
Speaker 1: before she goes like my head and hit sees. So

452
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:39,840
Speaker 1: it was just something great to share. It was really awesome. Absolutely,

453
00:24:39,920 --> 00:24:41,719
Speaker 1: what are your parents saying now, because I know they

454
00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:44,080
Speaker 1: didn't want you to be an actress, so are they?

455
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:47,840
Speaker 1: My mom wasn't a real big honest, this is the thing.

456
00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:50,040
Speaker 1: I wanted to be a child stars. They were like, Um,

457
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 1: that's not gonna happen. My dad on a bar is

458
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 1: like okay, whatever. Um, but you know, I think at

459
00:24:57,359 --> 00:24:59,320
Speaker 1: one point, I think about a year before because I

460
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 1: was forty years when I got the Office, so I

461
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:03,440
Speaker 1: had been guest starring. I've done a lot of Broadway.

462
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,520
Speaker 1: I was a second city. I mean, I had some

463
00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:08,480
Speaker 1: minor successes that like told me I was doing the

464
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 1: right thing, but um, I felt like a year before,

465
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 1: maybe six months before I got the office. My dad

466
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:16,440
Speaker 1: actually said to me, because he was the most importive,

467
00:25:16,880 --> 00:25:18,440
Speaker 1: he was sort of like, are you sure you don't

468
00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:20,400
Speaker 1: want to do something else. I was like, oh my god.

469
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:22,119
Speaker 1: Like if he's saying like, oh no, I like this

470
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,720
Speaker 1: is getting bad. Um. But yeah, I think at first

471
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,000
Speaker 1: they were sort of like we watched the whole thing

472
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:30,439
Speaker 1: and you barely talked, you know, me talk, you know.

473
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:32,920
Speaker 1: And then after a while they kind of bought on.

474
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 1: But that was okay. So I would just not to

475
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:37,840
Speaker 1: take the call from Philadelphia which was three hours earlier,

476
00:25:37,880 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 1: because sometimes I wouldn't know what God edited out or

477
00:25:40,560 --> 00:25:42,240
Speaker 1: and so I'm like, Okay, I don't want to get

478
00:25:42,280 --> 00:25:44,520
Speaker 1: upset about what's in around. I know, I know there's

479
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:46,320
Speaker 1: something bigger here, so you just have to sort of

480
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:49,360
Speaker 1: trust the process. I had to trust the process, like

481
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 1: I don't know a lot of what was it for

482
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:53,800
Speaker 1: you that's kind of stayed in it too, because I know,

483
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:55,600
Speaker 1: I mean I sometimes I think about your aunt too,

484
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:57,399
Speaker 1: you know, And I mean for me, I'm like, who

485
00:25:57,480 --> 00:25:59,800
Speaker 1: knows if I'll ever book anything ever again. So it's

486
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:01,920
Speaker 1: and you kind of like well maybe, okay, what else

487
00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 1: can I do? So what what was it for you?

488
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:05,840
Speaker 1: They were like, no, like this is this is it?

489
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:09,840
Speaker 1: And well, I think I remember like nine eleven, I

490
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:12,160
Speaker 1: was waiting tables in Beverly Hills at the same restaurant

491
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:14,640
Speaker 1: was um And we started the office in two thousand four,

492
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,480
Speaker 1: so it was three years before that, and I was

493
00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,680
Speaker 1: doing my comedy act, The Lampshades, was doing it every

494
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:21,640
Speaker 1: week and and auditioning and sometimes getting some you know

495
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 1: parts here and there. I thought, you know, if this

496
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: is it, this is all this is. I think I'm

497
00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:29,640
Speaker 1: okay with this, Like if I could go with that,

498
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:33,000
Speaker 1: because nine eleven was like very reflective, you know, for

499
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:35,359
Speaker 1: I don't know, I just feel like a lot of

500
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,680
Speaker 1: people made really interesting decisions at that time. I feel

501
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 1: like a lot of people got divorced that time or whatever,

502
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 1: change jobs. But I was like, okay, I could live

503
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:46,960
Speaker 1: with that. I could really live with that. So I

504
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 1: think that was just like I just got more and

505
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:52,399
Speaker 1: more tenacious and just kind of did everything I could.

506
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:54,479
Speaker 1: I love that, and you almost didn't. You're like, okay,

507
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:56,439
Speaker 1: like this is this is good, Like I'm able to

508
00:26:56,440 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: do things here, and you didn't put that pressure like

509
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,679
Speaker 1: I'm a failure because I feel like that's where I know,

510
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 1: that's where I go a lot where I'm like, it's

511
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,720
Speaker 1: just Hallmark or whatever, and I'm constantly saying that, and

512
00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:08,200
Speaker 1: it's like, but it's still work, and it's still you're

513
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:10,919
Speaker 1: still acting. It's still you're still doing but it's like

514
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:14,080
Speaker 1: it's not that like dream job that you think it is.

515
00:27:14,119 --> 00:27:16,159
Speaker 1: But I love kind of that outlook to say, no,

516
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:20,440
Speaker 1: that's that's still great and you're doing anything Hallmark because

517
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:23,920
Speaker 1: I did a Hallmark Christmas movie probably like was it

518
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:27,159
Speaker 1: two thousand ten or something like ten years ago, And

519
00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:29,520
Speaker 1: I remember there was this great actor that was in

520
00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:33,600
Speaker 1: UM in the cast. He had like he had one

521
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 1: uh he did movies and stuff. His name is Edward Herman.

522
00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:39,400
Speaker 1: He played like FDR and a TV movie in the seventies.

523
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 1: It was like a big deal. But anyway, he was

524
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:42,960
Speaker 1: like a legit dude, like he did. I think he

525
00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:46,040
Speaker 1: was in UM Oh my god, Oh what is it?

526
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:48,520
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I'm thinking that. I'm trying to think

527
00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 1: of the movie that was about the water Gate. Anyway,

528
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:52,560
Speaker 1: he's been He was in a lot of like very

529
00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:56,120
Speaker 1: early seventies movies, like really legit, dude. And I said

530
00:27:56,160 --> 00:27:57,840
Speaker 1: to him, Oh my god, I'm having such a hard

531
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,680
Speaker 1: time because I feel like I don't believe myself. This is,

532
00:28:00,840 --> 00:28:02,960
Speaker 1: you know, not the way I talked. And he said, listen,

533
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:07,760
Speaker 1: he goes, you wanna you're you're if we're presenting cheese,

534
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 1: you want to make the cheese delicious something like, you

535
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 1: want to make it really appetizing. It's sort of like

536
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 1: get out of your own way. Like basically what he

537
00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:17,879
Speaker 1: said to me was like stopping so full of whatever

538
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,040
Speaker 1: you think that you're supposed to be doing. And just

539
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 1: because I'll be honest with you, there's so many people

540
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:26,480
Speaker 1: I know that live on the Hallmark movies. They live

541
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:28,440
Speaker 1: on that channel, and I feel like, who am I

542
00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:33,119
Speaker 1: to think that. I mean, I'm lucky to be in

543
00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:36,680
Speaker 1: their homes, you know, on their TVs. I mean, I

544
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 1: just really feel like there's a humility factor that kicks

545
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 1: in and and you know, everybody has to listen to

546
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,600
Speaker 1: their own voice. But it's also like good over yourself. Yeah,

547
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:48,640
Speaker 1: very true. I mean that's hard with any kind of

548
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 1: entertainment profession, whether it's acting, music, professional athletics. It's like

549
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 1: we all have experienced that where you reach a certain

550
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:59,280
Speaker 1: level and it still feels like it's not enough, right,

551
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,840
Speaker 1: Like you think about how many young actresses would die

552
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: to be in a Hallmark movie or die to being

553
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,200
Speaker 1: a commercial, or how many college kids would love to

554
00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,480
Speaker 1: be on the team when I was on and it's

555
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 1: but it's any award winning or that Netflix show, and

556
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:16,040
Speaker 1: you're like, I'm still not good enough to get there, right.

557
00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:20,040
Speaker 1: It's just finding finding that balance between being you know,

558
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 1: happy with where you're at, but not but not complacent.

559
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:26,960
Speaker 1: You know it's well, And I think the secret to

560
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 1: is like, you know, everybody uh wants to get what

561
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,280
Speaker 1: they want, but do you really want what you get?

562
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 1: You have to really make peace with that. What is it?

563
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:38,920
Speaker 1: What do they say comparison is the thief of joy

564
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 1: for sure and a fortune cookie, but it's so truly

565
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:47,320
Speaker 1: it's all your joy. And I just feel like, oh

566
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:49,240
Speaker 1: my god, if you can just shut like put the

567
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:52,280
Speaker 1: blinders on, like she asked. That was something I actually

568
00:29:52,360 --> 00:29:53,920
Speaker 1: learned on you have to go the stars, like, don't

569
00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:57,280
Speaker 1: compare yourself to other people person in that competition. For

570
00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:00,160
Speaker 1: most of the competition, I was all the other been

571
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:02,280
Speaker 1: one of their twenties and I'm like, I remember getting

572
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:04,040
Speaker 1: like two high scores two weeks in a row, and

573
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:05,560
Speaker 1: like they kind of give me a little shade in

574
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 1: the ladieshop, and I'm like, what, like, just work harder,

575
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 1: what's wrong with you? You know, that's amazing, but it's

576
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 1: also just like again, like you just gotta keep your

577
00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:22,160
Speaker 1: eyes on your own paper, and it's hard. It's hard,

578
00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 1: and you know, and whatever whatever you know. I mean,

579
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:26,560
Speaker 1: if if it means you need to get off your

580
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,240
Speaker 1: butt and stop waiting for other people to get your work,

581
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 1: and maybe you need to create your own stuff, you know,

582
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:33,880
Speaker 1: I mean whatever that means, because I feel like I

583
00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:36,560
Speaker 1: do a lot of stage stuff just because I hate

584
00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:39,120
Speaker 1: waiting for the phone to ring, right, Yeah, for sure.

585
00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 1: And it's just about hustling too. Was there any with

586
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,400
Speaker 1: with a cast in the office, with that many kind

587
00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:47,480
Speaker 1: of people who all impacted the show so greatly, was

588
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:50,680
Speaker 1: there any kind of natural contention of like, man, you know,

589
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:52,560
Speaker 1: there's been a few weeks in the row, Angela has

590
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 1: gotten a little bit more, Meredith has gotten a little

591
00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 1: bit more. You know, I feel like we were because

592
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 1: we all start to kind of us on, you know,

593
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,560
Speaker 1: kind of unknowns, all of the unknowns pretty much. That

594
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,840
Speaker 1: really wasn't I feel like we were pretty much rooting

595
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:09,800
Speaker 1: for people, you know. I also feel like Steve said

596
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 1: us such a great tone because things were happening for him.

597
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:15,200
Speaker 1: I mean, he had not started movies before this, and

598
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: I feel like if he's not acting like a jerk

599
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:19,320
Speaker 1: like then no one else really, So I feel like

600
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 1: he set the tone. That's cool. The douchebag factor really

601
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:26,320
Speaker 1: low on the show, which was great. Did you have

602
00:31:26,480 --> 00:31:29,560
Speaker 1: to take do a lot of takes with a lot

603
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: of these scenes, because I mean, I watch again as

604
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:33,920
Speaker 1: a fan, I'm like, there's no way in hell I

605
00:31:33,960 --> 00:31:36,600
Speaker 1: could keep it straight faced, Like how the hell do

606
00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:40,560
Speaker 1: you do that? But in that kind of show, are

607
00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: you me? But you also ruin up for other people

608
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:46,200
Speaker 1: like you were on the take laughing, and also like

609
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:49,440
Speaker 1: you have to you guys are like let's go. I

610
00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:53,600
Speaker 1: want to get home. Stop laughing. It's so true. And

611
00:31:53,640 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 1: I also feel like, also you're part of the funny

612
00:31:55,840 --> 00:31:58,360
Speaker 1: if you can keep it together for sure, like like

613
00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:00,440
Speaker 1: you know, then you're then you're in it it. So

614
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:02,440
Speaker 1: you just have to, you know, do And sometimes I'm

615
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:04,600
Speaker 1: like I'm gonna drama, I'm gonna drama. I'm gonna drama,

616
00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:09,160
Speaker 1: Like I kind of things to myself, like what I

617
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:11,360
Speaker 1: can't even imagine. Um, Kate, can you tell us about,

618
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:15,040
Speaker 1: um what you're doing right now, because um, you're helping

619
00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:19,760
Speaker 1: COVID nineteen raising some money right yes, Amaze is this

620
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,920
Speaker 1: amazing organization that, um they're connected to the variety of

621
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 1: Boys and Girls clubs of Los Angeles and they you know,

622
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:30,960
Speaker 1: they're basically trying to keep the kids that go to

623
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:33,720
Speaker 1: the boys and girls clubs like they are. They go

624
00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:36,440
Speaker 1: for exercise, but they also go for food. They get

625
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:39,320
Speaker 1: fed there, and you know, all those things are closed

626
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 1: right now, so we need to figure out how to

627
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,600
Speaker 1: feed these kids. So what we're doing is we're asking

628
00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:47,840
Speaker 1: people to donate, and um, we're uh gonna pick some

629
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:51,040
Speaker 1: people from the people who donate, um to have a

630
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 1: virtual coffee date with creed Oscar plays jan and mea

631
00:32:58,040 --> 00:33:02,320
Speaker 1: plays Manredeth. So it's gonna be that's awesome. So I

632
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,480
Speaker 1: feel like if that's not incentive, I mean, um, yeah,

633
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:07,920
Speaker 1: what is I mean? But also just the incidive of

634
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,920
Speaker 1: the kids, like come on, like we're I know, everybody's

635
00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:14,680
Speaker 1: having a lot of weird issues right now. Financially actually

636
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,160
Speaker 1: all that stuff. But I'll bet you have food in

637
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:21,160
Speaker 1: your stomach. You know, I bet you've got a roof

638
00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:22,680
Speaker 1: over your head and you're not you know. I mean,

639
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:25,400
Speaker 1: it's just I don't know, it's just a little perspective,

640
00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:31,120
Speaker 1: perspective and people can go to Amy's dot com dot

641
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 1: com slash the office. Um yeah, and it's uh, you know,

642
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 1: it's easy. You don't have to give a lot. Really,

643
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:39,720
Speaker 1: I mean a little bit. I said, if everyone just

644
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 1: gives a dollar, like, imagine how much money can be raised.

645
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:48,400
Speaker 1: That's that's actually that's right. I mean it's crazy. So yeah,

646
00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:50,080
Speaker 1: I mean maybe that one thing you're going to buy

647
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:53,640
Speaker 1: on Amazon that you don't really need, right, Okay, thank

648
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:55,280
Speaker 1: you so so much for taking time out of your

649
00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: day to be with us. Go call your boyfriend back

650
00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:00,960
Speaker 1: and we appreciate your time. Appreciate so much, Kate. You

651
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:04,400
Speaker 1: guys are awesome. Take care of Kate. Oh, I forgot

652
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:11,399
Speaker 1: to show my dundee. Oh that's so great. I don't

653
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:13,080
Speaker 1: know what this is, but I'm sure he'll fill me in.

654
00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:17,719
Speaker 1: I'll feel you in. This makes my heart warm a dundee. Yeah,

655
00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:21,000
Speaker 1: I'll tell you. I'll feel you in don't mind my

656
00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:28,920
Speaker 1: pretty wife. Okay, we're awesome. Thank you, thank you. Oh

657
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 1: my goodness, I love her. You have to, I think,

658
00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 1: sorry like you, but you didn't say something like she

659
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:42,640
Speaker 1: was she's Oh my goodness, she was awesome. I just

660
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 1: have to make a little asterix though, too. I love Hallmark, Okay.

661
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:50,120
Speaker 1: I would like to be the new Laurie Loughlin for sure.

662
00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,040
Speaker 1: So that was just like back in the day. I

663
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 1: used to be like, oh, because you know, I see

664
00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:57,600
Speaker 1: people on things that I'm like, well, I mean, anybody

665
00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:00,440
Speaker 1: wants to be you on the billboard going down sunset

666
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 1: and you know, but I'm I'm happy to be a

667
00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 1: Hallmark girl. You love the Hallmark. I love the Hallmark Channel.

668
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:09,719
Speaker 1: I love life. Great to you, they love you, love them.

669
00:35:10,120 --> 00:35:12,840
Speaker 1: But she's amazing, so much fun. I just want to

670
00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:14,840
Speaker 1: sit down and have coffee with her, for sure. But

671
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:16,960
Speaker 1: she reminds me of your aunt a little bit. Yeah,

672
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:19,120
Speaker 1: because your aunts in the Second City. It's just like that,

673
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 1: like you know, and she worked her butt off and

674
00:35:22,280 --> 00:35:24,000
Speaker 1: she got her you know, she got her break. I love.

675
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:26,279
Speaker 1: I just love that so much. All right, um, let's

676
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:40,160
Speaker 1: take a break and then let's read some email. Do

677
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:42,319
Speaker 1: you want to read an email? Bib did you really

678
00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:43,840
Speaker 1: want me to read the email? Which one do you

679
00:35:43,880 --> 00:35:48,239
Speaker 1: want me to read? Do you? Uh? Carly? Carly? Okay? No, no, Anonymous,

680
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:51,760
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Anonymous. I mean Carly needs to be heard too, Okay.

681
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:55,080
Speaker 1: Quarantined and no therapy. I've been with my husband for

682
00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 1: thirteen years, married for seven. We have three kids together.

683
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:00,799
Speaker 1: Are two boys are twelve, up in six, and our

684
00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:04,000
Speaker 1: girl is eighteen months. Just three weeks ago, my husband

685
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:08,160
Speaker 1: confessed to me that he was shoot um. Just three

686
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 1: weeks ago, my husband confessed to me that he was

687
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:14,520
Speaker 1: unfaithful to me twice over ten years ago. He says

688
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:16,560
Speaker 1: it was just a one time thing, and he's a

689
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:18,719
Speaker 1: great man who I know made very poor choices. So

690
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:20,520
Speaker 1: I gave him one condition, we have to go to

691
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:23,359
Speaker 1: couples therapy. Now with the quarantine, we've not been able

692
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:25,480
Speaker 1: to go to therapy or speak to anyone. Now that

693
00:36:25,560 --> 00:36:28,520
Speaker 1: the kids are home and my husband is working from home.

694
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,080
Speaker 1: He sleeps in the guest bedroom when I asked him

695
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:33,719
Speaker 1: um to. But sometimes that is not enough. Some days

696
00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:36,799
Speaker 1: are good, others not so much. I have hoped for us,

697
00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 1: but we need help and it's hard to get it. Now,

698
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:41,719
Speaker 1: what are some other ways we can work on our

699
00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,759
Speaker 1: marriage without therapy? Right now? You know it's so hard

700
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:48,880
Speaker 1: about that. It's like it's twofold. First is like I

701
00:36:49,200 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 1: love that he told her, Like what a gift that

702
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 1: like he gave her because she doesn't have to find out,

703
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 1: Like she didn't have to find out. She didn't have,

704
00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:00,719
Speaker 1: you know, to discover it. So like at shows right

705
00:37:00,760 --> 00:37:03,960
Speaker 1: there that he must have just been guilt ridden with

706
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,560
Speaker 1: all this guilt and that you know, he just couldn't

707
00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:09,239
Speaker 1: live with that anymore. So you want to tell her.

708
00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:12,360
Speaker 1: And I think that's great that he did that. However,

709
00:37:15,480 --> 00:37:19,800
Speaker 1: now she's in that place where it's all been a lie. Mhm.

710
00:37:21,000 --> 00:37:22,839
Speaker 1: How could he have said these things to me? How

711
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:27,000
Speaker 1: could he have done these things? Oh? I bet? Okay,

712
00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:29,040
Speaker 1: So ten years ago when we were having our one

713
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:33,000
Speaker 1: kid and you know, when we went to this or

714
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 1: we went to this birthday party, that was a lie,

715
00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:39,080
Speaker 1: and like this was a lie because of one incident

716
00:37:41,000 --> 00:37:43,000
Speaker 1: makes it all a lie for us. And that's what's

717
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:45,960
Speaker 1: just so like devastating because it's almost like in my

718
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:49,600
Speaker 1: mind and I this is probably the worst thing ever

719
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:51,560
Speaker 1: I could ever say. But if it was one time.

720
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:52,840
Speaker 1: I want to be like, I don't even want to

721
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:56,160
Speaker 1: know because I don't want my past to feel like

722
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:58,879
Speaker 1: a lie. But then like, but then it is a lie,

723
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:01,520
Speaker 1: because that's a lie that you're like keeping from me.

724
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:04,919
Speaker 1: So it's such a weird. Yeah, I was just gonna

725
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:07,920
Speaker 1: ask you. And this isn't me believing that this is

726
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:10,839
Speaker 1: the what should have happened, or this isn't me saying

727
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:13,480
Speaker 1: this is what I do. This is just me kind

728
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:16,839
Speaker 1: of playing devil's advocate just for the topic of conversation.

729
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:22,480
Speaker 1: And when it's something that happened that long ago, like

730
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:25,000
Speaker 1: you said, he must have been just eaten away by

731
00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 1: this um over time. I still want to know. No, no, no,

732
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:32,239
Speaker 1: for sure, But if you look at it from a

733
00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:35,560
Speaker 1: big picture, like stand away from it, you're like, okay,

734
00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:40,279
Speaker 1: say he hasn't done anything in over ten years and

735
00:38:40,520 --> 00:38:45,040
Speaker 1: they have these three kids in its great life. It's

736
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 1: also I can see how difficult it is to get

737
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:53,239
Speaker 1: to the point to say something when you're like, man,

738
00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:58,880
Speaker 1: I don't want to hurt this person's it's it's so tough. Ultimately,

739
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,479
Speaker 1: you can never go wrong telling the truth, bottom line,

740
00:39:01,560 --> 00:39:03,080
Speaker 1: And I can never go wrong, and I think at

741
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 1: the end of the day, that is always the right

742
00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:06,759
Speaker 1: thing to do, is to tell the truth because no

743
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:09,319
Speaker 1: matter what, if that person, like that person is living

744
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:11,600
Speaker 1: with that lie in that shame and for them, that's

745
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:16,480
Speaker 1: so important to tell and to like let that go. Now,

746
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:20,560
Speaker 1: obviously the it's going to end up hurting the spouse

747
00:39:20,920 --> 00:39:23,719
Speaker 1: or the partner, and that's unfortunate, but this, you know,

748
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,320
Speaker 1: it's very unfair, and it's it's all those things. But

749
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:28,399
Speaker 1: that is, at the end of the day, the right

750
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:30,680
Speaker 1: thing to do. And even though I say I don't

751
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:34,359
Speaker 1: want to, like even if it's one time, I do. Yeah,

752
00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 1: it's a it's a do, but don't. And I think

753
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:39,320
Speaker 1: of it like insects in the city, when Steve cheated

754
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:41,880
Speaker 1: on Miranda, Um, it was just that and like in

755
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:44,239
Speaker 1: Carrious like it was just that one time, you know,

756
00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:49,319
Speaker 1: and I feel like, yes, it was just that one time.

757
00:39:49,480 --> 00:39:52,720
Speaker 1: But Steve, look how upset he was, like he couldn't

758
00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:57,520
Speaker 1: have that lie and obviously like he had to let

759
00:39:57,640 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 1: that go. So I don't know. I I would say,

760
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 1: like it ways to help them. I mean, it's it's

761
00:40:05,680 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 1: so hard not kind of being in that space. What

762
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:11,359
Speaker 1: I would say and what I've learned is that even

763
00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:13,440
Speaker 1: though maybe to you and I'm not saying that you're

764
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:15,960
Speaker 1: doing this, I'm just making this up, saying that you

765
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:19,360
Speaker 1: might be thinking those memories are alive, but those memories

766
00:40:19,440 --> 00:40:22,720
Speaker 1: are still your memories, so whatever. So like, for example,

767
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:24,320
Speaker 1: I used to say to Mike, all the time, you

768
00:40:24,440 --> 00:40:28,080
Speaker 1: took away my first year of marriage, my first yeah,

769
00:40:28,120 --> 00:40:30,400
Speaker 1: first year of marriage and are walking down the aisle,

770
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:32,160
Speaker 1: so that must have not been real. So the marriage

771
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:35,560
Speaker 1: wasn't real, you know, Jolie's birth, all that stuff, being pregnant.

772
00:40:35,640 --> 00:40:38,160
Speaker 1: So I let him take those memories from me. And

773
00:40:38,239 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 1: my therapist kept saying to me, no, you were present there,

774
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:46,759
Speaker 1: that doesn't that's not for him. He can't take those

775
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:50,800
Speaker 1: memories from you. But I held I let him have

776
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:53,160
Speaker 1: that power to take that memory because I'm like, well

777
00:40:53,239 --> 00:40:55,759
Speaker 1: he wasn't present, and she's like, but were you? Were

778
00:40:55,840 --> 00:40:59,760
Speaker 1: you present? Those memories are still real. Your relationship memory

779
00:41:00,800 --> 00:41:05,239
Speaker 1: might be taken, but your memory of those things can

780
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:08,440
Speaker 1: still be real. And also to you know guys, and

781
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:10,719
Speaker 1: I'm not saying just guys, but like women too, when

782
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 1: when you're in that relationship, I knew I've done this too.

783
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:16,840
Speaker 1: I can like you guys said, um, you can, and I,

784
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:18,680
Speaker 1: like I said, I've done this too where I have

785
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:24,920
Speaker 1: um compartmentalized it. So maybe he was present, but like,

786
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 1: how do you how do you say that? Because I'm

787
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 1: like you, you you were and you weren't. Really You're

788
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:34,040
Speaker 1: a version of your one version was present. Yeah, I mean,

789
00:41:34,080 --> 00:41:39,000
Speaker 1: I can see how one lie can go over, can

790
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:43,520
Speaker 1: bleed over into other memories. But ultimately, you know, I

791
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:45,560
Speaker 1: was still present at our wedding and still there and

792
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,440
Speaker 1: the same thing with our daughter. And I know it's

793
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:50,160
Speaker 1: hard to believe that because of things that had gone

794
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:54,120
Speaker 1: on or we're going on, but I'll still there in present. Um,

795
00:41:55,760 --> 00:42:00,839
Speaker 1: you know my thing, I guess for any kind of uh,

796
00:42:01,480 --> 00:42:04,720
Speaker 1: I don't know advice. Again, we're not professionals, but early

797
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 1: on what did help us once we discovered it was

798
00:42:07,040 --> 00:42:10,279
Speaker 1: the fantos check in and just to have for when

799
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:12,719
Speaker 1: you're in this kind of environment around each other so

800
00:42:12,960 --> 00:42:17,880
Speaker 1: much where passiveness could be so easy, and getting angry

801
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,160
Speaker 1: with each other and getting short and defensive with each other,

802
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 1: having it the nightly check in, especially at this vulnerable time,

803
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:28,319
Speaker 1: just to speak on your feelings, affirm each other, express needs,

804
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:30,080
Speaker 1: and own anything you need to own for that day

805
00:42:31,080 --> 00:42:33,239
Speaker 1: and just do you want to go through that again

806
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:35,319
Speaker 1: just in case if someone has missed that, Yeah, if

807
00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:37,840
Speaker 1: if if anyone out there has missed that. And for anonymous,

808
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:40,040
Speaker 1: you express your feelings to each other. You can just

809
00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:42,960
Speaker 1: state your feelings and you can do a brief description

810
00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:45,359
Speaker 1: why you're feeling that way. I'm feeling angry, I'm feeling hurt,

811
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:48,440
Speaker 1: I'm feeling sad, I'm feeling happy, I'm feeling whatever it

812
00:42:48,520 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 1: may be, you affirm your partner affirmed them. It could

813
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: be something as simple as, hey, I appreciate you cooking dinner,

814
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:56,560
Speaker 1: clean up the kitchen, to hey, I appreciate you not

815
00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 1: getting defensive when I expressed my feelings earlier today or

816
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 1: when I was kind of acting mean towards you. You didn't,

817
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:06,719
Speaker 1: you know, retaliate um needs you express your needs of

818
00:43:07,160 --> 00:43:09,040
Speaker 1: you know, around things coming up or in that day

819
00:43:09,120 --> 00:43:10,880
Speaker 1: or in that moment, or say hey, I really need

820
00:43:10,920 --> 00:43:14,000
Speaker 1: you to be more empathetic and you know, and maybe

821
00:43:14,040 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 1: apologize again or and then you know, own own anything

822
00:43:20,239 --> 00:43:25,480
Speaker 1: any anything that you did, and just being on the

823
00:43:25,520 --> 00:43:29,160
Speaker 1: receiving end of things to hear, you know, especially early

824
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:31,640
Speaker 1: on when Janna would sit there and do these check

825
00:43:31,719 --> 00:43:37,400
Speaker 1: ins and own something from that day or recently of Hey, ultimately,

826
00:43:37,480 --> 00:43:39,359
Speaker 1: I am sorry for being mean towards you, or being

827
00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:43,680
Speaker 1: past ever being aggressive and reacting in a negative place

828
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:48,279
Speaker 1: around being hurt. Like just receiving her owning that motivated

829
00:43:48,360 --> 00:43:53,120
Speaker 1: me more to be empathetic. So that's the only thing

830
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:55,400
Speaker 1: I could really say in this time, with no therapy

831
00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:59,000
Speaker 1: and around each other so much, just over communicate those

832
00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:02,560
Speaker 1: feelings so it becomes a more natural thing. Yeah, I

833
00:44:02,680 --> 00:44:04,480
Speaker 1: love it, and I'm sorry that y'all are in that space.

834
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:06,920
Speaker 1: But I love the fact that you guys are willing

835
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:08,959
Speaker 1: to fight through it because I think if two people

836
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 1: can well, we believe that if two people um work together,

837
00:44:12,880 --> 00:44:17,520
Speaker 1: you can get through it. All Right, Babe, I think

838
00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:20,560
Speaker 1: that's it. I think that's it. Um, you're ready to

839
00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:23,920
Speaker 1: go kill the parent game. By the way, can we

840
00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:27,320
Speaker 1: talk about can we do like the next episode? Do

841
00:44:27,640 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 1: um like a mommy dad episode? Just talk like all kids.

842
00:44:32,320 --> 00:44:34,880
Speaker 1: Let's do it, Okay, alright, bye guys,