WEBVTT - My Love Language Is Vasectomy with Ashley Graham 0:00:00.760 --> 0:00:04.120 Hi, Catherine, Hi Chelsea. The last time we saw each 0:00:04.160 --> 0:00:06.200 other was at the Wheel Turn at my show in 0:00:06.280 --> 0:00:09.520 Los Angeles. It was so exciting to see you actually 0:00:09.920 --> 0:00:12.080 doing your thing. Did you come to the first show 0:00:12.160 --> 0:00:14.000 or the second show? The second show okay, good? The 0:00:14.040 --> 0:00:17.800 second show was an A plus plus amazing. You were fantastic. 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:20.840 Oh that was so fun. Thank you. It was. It's 0:00:20.880 --> 0:00:22.560 always a nerve wracking in l A because I have 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:25.560 so many friends and family and industry that come that 0:00:25.640 --> 0:00:28.640 you're just like, funk funck fuck. And we did two 0:00:28.640 --> 0:00:30.000 shows in one night, and then we went to San 0:00:30.040 --> 0:00:32.680 Francisco the next night. I did two shows there. By 0:00:32.680 --> 0:00:34.320 the end of that, I was like, I can't think 0:00:34.320 --> 0:00:37.920 anymore spent. I'm sure spent, But I want to promote 0:00:37.960 --> 0:00:40.600 my Nashville show. Oh. I just announced a whole slew 0:00:40.640 --> 0:00:43.639 of news stand up. Yeah, and announced twenty five more 0:00:43.720 --> 0:00:46.600 dates to the Vaccinated and Horny tour. So if you haven't, 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:49.040 if I haven't come to your city, check my website 0:00:49.120 --> 0:00:51.559 Chelsea Handler dot com for new dates. And there are 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:54.760 tickets available for my second show in Nashville, where I 0:00:54.760 --> 0:00:57.840 will be taping my special on June tenth at the Rheman. 0:00:58.320 --> 0:01:02.120 So we also have merch for sale at Chelsea Hamler 0:01:02.160 --> 0:01:05.400 dot com. We have Dear Chelsea merch and vaccinated in 0:01:05.400 --> 0:01:09.160 a horny merch and that is all all really cute. 0:01:09.560 --> 0:01:13.000 We're not selling flip flops. Contrary to popular belief. We 0:01:13.080 --> 0:01:15.720 thought about it just to say fuck you, but we 0:01:15.880 --> 0:01:17.840 did not do it. We did not pull the trigger 0:01:17.880 --> 0:01:20.840 on that. Yes, COVID shipping delay has really made that 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:24.280 not possible. Yeah. One other thing I was going to 0:01:24.400 --> 0:01:28.240 tell you about your show is that, totally randomly, my 0:01:28.400 --> 0:01:32.440 husband accidentally bumped into a woman and then the person 0:01:32.520 --> 0:01:34.480 she was with said, in a fun jokey way, do 0:01:34.480 --> 0:01:37.400 you know who this is? This is Chelsea Handler's housekeeper. 0:01:37.800 --> 0:01:41.440 And I was like my bell and gave her a 0:01:41.520 --> 0:01:45.360 huge hug in this huge crowd of like thousands of people. 0:01:45.680 --> 0:01:49.160 I'm like, of course, he steps on my fucking my bell. 0:01:49.280 --> 0:01:51.760 I went to my bell. Is so funny. I went 0:01:51.800 --> 0:01:54.400 to a pet psychic. I'm hosting Jimmy Kimmel Show the 0:01:54.440 --> 0:01:58.040 week of June and we were doing some pre tape segments, right, 0:01:58.080 --> 0:02:00.000 So one of them was me taking Bert and Bernie 0:02:00.040 --> 0:02:02.600 to a pet psychic, and the pet psychic told me 0:02:02.720 --> 0:02:05.360 that Berniee loves me more than anyone, that she's just 0:02:05.480 --> 0:02:07.920 upset that I leave all the time, and that she 0:02:08.120 --> 0:02:10.519 loves me the most, and that she's always playing hard 0:02:10.560 --> 0:02:13.560 to get, which is has been my suspicion. I've always 0:02:13.600 --> 0:02:16.960 been suspicious because Bernice is tricky and just like a girl. 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:19.720 Right she comes in. She'll come into my room, come 0:02:19.800 --> 0:02:21.800 right up to my bed, sniff around, and when I 0:02:21.800 --> 0:02:24.360 put my head down to scratch her nose or her face, 0:02:24.760 --> 0:02:28.240 she runs out in Hall's ass like like I'm accosting her. 0:02:28.280 --> 0:02:31.360 I'm like, bitch fucking came in here, and but I 0:02:31.440 --> 0:02:34.400 know that that's it's her. She's insecure and she's just 0:02:34.480 --> 0:02:36.760 trying to get my attention, and then she wants me 0:02:36.800 --> 0:02:39.320 to come out and play with her. So the psychic 0:02:39.840 --> 0:02:42.880 confirmed all of those beliefs for me, and I told 0:02:42.919 --> 0:02:45.560 my Bell and ever since then, my Bell has been 0:02:45.600 --> 0:02:48.799 treating Bernie's differently. Yeah, she's definitely. She sent me two 0:02:48.800 --> 0:02:50.840 pictures of them at the park this weekend. Bert was 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:54.720 on a blanket and Bernice was in the dirt. So 0:02:54.880 --> 0:02:57.440 is my Bell jealous? Now? Well she should? Yeah, she 0:02:57.440 --> 0:02:58.880 she was jealous when I told her that she didn't 0:02:58.880 --> 0:03:02.600 smile or laugh. She takes her ownership of pretty seriously. 0:03:02.919 --> 0:03:04.600 And when I came home from filming that bit, I 0:03:04.600 --> 0:03:06.440 said to Joe Coy, I was like, so I went 0:03:06.480 --> 0:03:08.240 to this pet psychic and she said this, And then 0:03:08.320 --> 0:03:11.079 Joe goes, well did she He goes, do you think 0:03:11.120 --> 0:03:13.600 she looked you up beforehand? I'm like, Joe, it's a 0:03:13.639 --> 0:03:15.840 pet psychic. I don't give a funk what she did. Like, 0:03:15.919 --> 0:03:19.000 I'm not going there for some real information and feedback. 0:03:19.480 --> 0:03:22.120 Even though the one piece of information I did like, 0:03:22.200 --> 0:03:25.320 I decided to take. Yeah, keep what works for you, 0:03:25.600 --> 0:03:28.919 get rid of what doesn't. Right. Yeah, it's very exciting 0:03:28.960 --> 0:03:33.280 to be in New York City together. Yes, I can't 0:03:33.320 --> 0:03:36.480 believe it. It was this weird thing where you had 0:03:36.520 --> 0:03:39.320 today available. I was randomly going to be here in 0:03:39.400 --> 0:03:41.440 New York and I'm heading to a plane in a 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:43.960 few minutes after this. But there was like a one 0:03:44.040 --> 0:03:46.520 hour and a half window where we could come and 0:03:46.600 --> 0:03:49.440 also our fabulous guest today could be here. I know, 0:03:49.520 --> 0:03:51.800 we're very excited about our guests today because we've been 0:03:51.800 --> 0:03:54.600 trying to do this but in person only. Because she's 0:03:54.640 --> 0:03:56.320 the type of person you only want to be in 0:03:56.360 --> 0:04:00.120 person with because she's that kind of girl, and we 0:04:00.160 --> 0:04:02.120 made it happen here in New York today. She is 0:04:02.120 --> 0:04:08.640 a supermodel, a body activist, an entrepreneur, global ambassador for Nicks. 0:04:09.160 --> 0:04:13.800 She just launched a new lingerie campaign with Nixt and 0:04:13.840 --> 0:04:17.080 it's called a Big Strong Woman campaign. And she just 0:04:17.200 --> 0:04:19.920 joined a skincare brand where she's an investor and partner 0:04:19.960 --> 0:04:23.200 and it's called Big One. Please welcome Ashley Graham. Thank 0:04:23.200 --> 0:04:25.760 you for having me. Oh my god, thank you for coming, 0:04:25.800 --> 0:04:28.680 because well we're in New York today and we wanted 0:04:28.720 --> 0:04:31.000 to do this in person. And I know that you 0:04:31.080 --> 0:04:35.040 have been a baby making machine for one. Seems like 0:04:35.200 --> 0:04:40.200 she's had about eight babies in the last It's what 0:04:40.240 --> 0:04:42.560 it feels like. And every time I look at them, 0:04:42.560 --> 0:04:44.520 I'm like, there's more of you, and it feels like 0:04:44.560 --> 0:04:50.840 they're just they're just they're growing and growing. Anyways, Yeah, 0:04:50.880 --> 0:04:56.600 we're good. Thanks are you leaving? He's just supervirising always. 0:04:57.760 --> 0:05:00.600 It's like, now you're like really working people that you're 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:05.279 sleeping with. I love it. Any other way to do things. 0:05:05.480 --> 0:05:07.560 The guy who was just on on screen there, he's 0:05:07.600 --> 0:05:12.400 my husband sleeping with him. Now that women, now that 0:05:12.400 --> 0:05:15.120 women are allowed to. Is that your mom? Yes, that 0:05:15.279 --> 0:05:19.480 is my mom. Yeah, and my sister she looks just 0:05:19.520 --> 0:05:21.960 like you. How cute. Oh, it's a family affair today. 0:05:22.040 --> 0:05:25.160 I love it. Did you dye your hair and you 0:05:25.320 --> 0:05:29.000 have your eyeshadow in the same tone on purpose? I 0:05:29.040 --> 0:05:31.000 was telling my mom used to have to tell her 0:05:31.400 --> 0:05:35.120 not matchy matchy. It's not in anymore, like after the nineties. 0:05:35.160 --> 0:05:37.320 It's over and you know, we were just talking about it. 0:05:37.320 --> 0:05:39.840 I'm like, I'm sorry, mom, matchy matchy is back in again. 0:05:39.880 --> 0:05:42.919 She's like, I just learned to stop doing that. Like 0:05:42.960 --> 0:05:47.040 it's called monochromatic. Now. I love a monochromatic mama. I 0:05:47.400 --> 0:05:51.200 feel cute. Your mother must be stoked though. Okay, so 0:05:51.279 --> 0:05:54.080 there's you know, she's like there's grandma and then there's 0:05:54.120 --> 0:05:57.560 caretaker Grandma, and she's caretaker Grandma. So she really likes 0:05:57.560 --> 0:06:01.320 her days off. Oh it's different. It's different like being 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:03.920 granny who just comes in and sees the babies and 0:06:03.960 --> 0:06:10.200 like leaves. She's like, okay, another day for you know. 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:13.880 I had Isaac in and then I had my twins 0:06:14.200 --> 0:06:17.040 the top of this year in two and it's like, 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:19.800 right when I stopped breastfeeding, I got pregnant with the twins. 0:06:19.880 --> 0:06:22.200 It was just boom boom boom, my body. I've given 0:06:22.240 --> 0:06:24.400 it up to love. That's what Justin said, You gave 0:06:24.400 --> 0:06:26.719 your body up to love. I'm just I'm ready for 0:06:26.760 --> 0:06:29.360 it to come back, like to see myself again. But 0:06:29.520 --> 0:06:32.440 I look at my little angels and I said, I 0:06:32.520 --> 0:06:35.760 did it for you. So were you planning on getting 0:06:35.800 --> 0:06:38.800 pregnant that soon after or did you? We talked about it. Yeah, 0:06:38.800 --> 0:06:40.560 we said, okay, if we're going to do this again, 0:06:40.640 --> 0:06:43.080 let's do it. And it wasn't like a hard decision 0:06:43.120 --> 0:06:46.159 because we knew we wanted a second. But I didn't 0:06:46.160 --> 0:06:48.200 know it's going to happen that quickly. And I did 0:06:48.279 --> 0:06:50.839 not know it was going to be twins. If I 0:06:50.839 --> 0:06:52.279 would have known it was going to be twins, I 0:06:52.320 --> 0:06:56.240 probably would have waited maybe another year. I am glad 0:06:56.279 --> 0:06:58.840 I got it over with. I always wanted three kids. 0:06:59.160 --> 0:07:01.560 I didn't want a middle child. I didn't know how 0:07:01.600 --> 0:07:03.960 that was going to work. But why do you say that? 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:08.240 Are you? I'm the oldest, and I am the boss eest, 0:07:08.320 --> 0:07:11.280 I'm the loudest. I run the show and I have 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:15.000 seen how my baby sister acts and my middle sister acts, 0:07:15.040 --> 0:07:18.240 and I just never wanted a middle child, didn't want 0:07:18.280 --> 0:07:21.400 anyone like your middle sister. I'm a middle child. You are, 0:07:21.480 --> 0:07:25.160 and do you feel like you're a handful um? Maybe 0:07:25.240 --> 0:07:27.120 last than my sister who's in the other room right now. 0:07:27.240 --> 0:07:30.080 Love you, Diana. It's hard when your family is listening 0:07:30.120 --> 0:07:32.240 to the podcast in the next room, to be quite frank. 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:35.760 I love my sisters, but I have met so many 0:07:35.760 --> 0:07:38.520 middle children, and I just that was my one request. 0:07:38.560 --> 0:07:40.000 So I feel like God was on my side and 0:07:40.000 --> 0:07:42.880 he said, Boom, you get twins. And there are two 0:07:42.880 --> 0:07:45.960 hours and seven minutes apart. Two hours and seven minutes. 0:07:46.000 --> 0:07:49.800 Oh God, that sounds like what happened in those two hours, 0:07:49.840 --> 0:07:53.680 and literally laboring in a tinyess in New York City 0:07:53.680 --> 0:07:57.560 bathtub because I was having my birthpool set up and 0:07:57.600 --> 0:07:59.960 it just wasn't happening fast enough. And then boom, Roman 0:08:00.160 --> 0:08:04.120 was like I'm coming out, mom, Oh my god. So yes, 0:08:04.240 --> 0:08:07.440 I have been pregnant for two years, breastfeeding for freaking 0:08:07.440 --> 0:08:10.119 two years. I'm on their four months now, I'm looking 0:08:10.120 --> 0:08:12.160 at six months, and I'm going to check in mentally 0:08:12.920 --> 0:08:16.080 with myself, see how I'm doing, and then either stop 0:08:16.720 --> 0:08:19.680 or yeah, but I'm supplementing with formula, so it feels 0:08:19.760 --> 0:08:22.320 like there's no formula shortage. So don't worry about that. 0:08:22.760 --> 0:08:26.880 It is such a thing. But yeah, it's a tough 0:08:26.960 --> 0:08:30.880 situation right now for all those families that need formula. Yeah. Absolutely, 0:08:31.360 --> 0:08:33.920 Well tell me a little bit about what your experience 0:08:33.960 --> 0:08:36.559 has been, because it's not just like you had one baby. 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:38.280 It is kind of like you had three babies and 0:08:38.280 --> 0:08:40.720 you're done now. Because you know the statistics. If you 0:08:40.720 --> 0:08:43.120 have three boys in a row, you automatically get a girl. 0:08:43.640 --> 0:08:46.480 Because my mom. Yeah, well everybody keeps telling me, you 0:08:46.520 --> 0:08:48.280 know you're gonna have a fourth if then it's going 0:08:48.360 --> 0:08:50.400 to be a boy. Oh no, No, once you have three, 0:08:50.400 --> 0:08:53.120 if one sex, the chances are higher that you're going 0:08:53.160 --> 0:08:55.480 to have the opposite sex. My mom and all of 0:08:55.480 --> 0:08:58.920 her sisters had three boys and then girls. Yeah, my 0:08:58.960 --> 0:09:02.000 mom had three boys and three girls. Okay, so you're 0:09:02.000 --> 0:09:03.800 telling me maybe I should try it again. Well, if 0:09:03.840 --> 0:09:06.800 you want a girl, you know, I mean, unless you're 0:09:06.800 --> 0:09:08.760 counting one of the kids to transition, you know what 0:09:08.800 --> 0:09:11.720 I mean, Right, you have to hence your bets, Like, 0:09:11.760 --> 0:09:13.520 if you really want a girl, I think three is 0:09:13.559 --> 0:09:16.280 a great number. For kids in a family, but four 0:09:16.360 --> 0:09:18.240 is also a great number. I come from a big 0:09:18.280 --> 0:09:21.520 family like you company are there there six? And you 0:09:21.640 --> 0:09:23.880 come from like you either make what you had or 0:09:24.280 --> 0:09:28.400 you abstained all together. You have a sister, Yes, we're 0:09:28.480 --> 0:09:31.200 but we're two of four, so we have brothers on 0:09:31.240 --> 0:09:34.000 either side. And my brothers are actually fourteen years apart. 0:09:34.240 --> 0:09:37.520 Same parents, like same mom and dad were released spread apart. 0:09:37.559 --> 0:09:39.520 But yeah, we'll like each other. So I could just 0:09:39.559 --> 0:09:43.520 wait another ten years, maybe exactly have a caboose. How 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:45.880 does Justin feel? What is it? What are his thoughts about? 0:09:46.080 --> 0:09:49.800 He got a vasectomy? Oh, well I guess that answered, Well, 0:09:49.880 --> 0:09:51.760 then I guess you're not having another baby. You can 0:09:51.760 --> 0:09:53.720 reverse it. The doctor who gave it to him said 0:09:53.880 --> 0:09:57.239 he's done as many reversals as he's done actual vasectomies. 0:09:57.440 --> 0:10:00.720 So that's like where we're standing right now. I knew 0:10:00.760 --> 0:10:02.600 I love Justin for a reason. You know what, It 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:05.480 really takes a real man to get a sect to me. Yes, 0:10:05.720 --> 0:10:08.920 I think that it's important to have that conversation in 0:10:08.960 --> 0:10:11.480 your relationship. But he didn't have to have the conversation 0:10:11.559 --> 0:10:13.200 with me. He just told me, I'm going to do it. 0:10:13.280 --> 0:10:16.160 I don't want You've done enough. He said, you carried 0:10:16.200 --> 0:10:17.960 these children, you pushed them out, and I saw what 0:10:18.040 --> 0:10:21.000 you went through. I can get a vasectomy. I know. 0:10:21.120 --> 0:10:23.000 I didn't even have to ask him. I wish there 0:10:23.000 --> 0:10:25.680 were other straight men listening to this podcast to take 0:10:25.760 --> 0:10:28.800 this advice, you know what I mean. That's a real man, 0:10:29.520 --> 0:10:33.160 and you guys have a beautiful, beautiful relationship that anyone 0:10:33.200 --> 0:10:35.320 who's ever met and either one of you or even 0:10:35.360 --> 0:10:38.760 watched you on social media can glean. He's such a sweetheart. 0:10:38.800 --> 0:10:40.640 I feel so blessed to have him as my husband's 0:10:40.720 --> 0:10:43.400 We're about to celebrate eleven and a half years, so 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:46.360 I guess no, we're about to celebrate twelve years. Yeah, 0:10:46.520 --> 0:10:49.559 and three kids later. I mean, I don't know what 0:10:49.600 --> 0:10:53.000 we're gonna do for that twelfth year celebration, but it's 0:10:53.000 --> 0:10:55.240 going to be something fun. I mean, you're about to 0:10:55.240 --> 0:10:59.360 have one year celebration was a lot different. You have 0:10:59.480 --> 0:11:02.040 to celebrate one year. Oh, Joe will want to celebrate 0:11:02.080 --> 0:11:06.080 one year. He's all about celebrating. Is he the romantic? Yes, yeah, 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:09.840 he's the romantic. And I have a hard time. Oh well, actually, 0:11:09.880 --> 0:11:12.040 you know the first time Joe and I got together. 0:11:12.120 --> 0:11:15.000 I went to Nashville. I was performing in Nashville and 0:11:15.040 --> 0:11:16.719 I was staying at a friend's house and I got 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:19.120 there and my assistant called and she goes, walk outside, 0:11:19.120 --> 0:11:21.960 there's a delivery for you. And I went and I 0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:25.760 saw three dozen long stemmed roses, and I immediately my 0:11:25.880 --> 0:11:31.320 first instinct was like cringe, like roses. Don't send me roses. 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:33.960 And then I thought, no, Chelsea, Chelsea, that's the old 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:36.920 you you've been to. This is a man who's demonstrating love. 0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:40.080 Accept it, he loves you. I had to say it 0:11:40.120 --> 0:11:42.240 like in my head three times, like this is a 0:11:42.320 --> 0:11:44.680 nice thing you like, and I was like, okay, okay, 0:11:44.679 --> 0:11:47.360 I love this. And then I embraced them, and thankfully 0:11:47.400 --> 0:11:49.480 I did, because he kept sending them over and over again. 0:11:49.520 --> 0:11:51.280 And then we started sending them back and forth to 0:11:51.360 --> 0:11:55.040 each other before each other's shows and performances. And then 0:11:55.080 --> 0:11:56.480 finally I was like, hey, can we put a pin 0:11:56.520 --> 0:12:00.439 in this? It's getting really expensive. It's like fucking dollars 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:02.839 every time. I'm like this is some ways like we're 0:12:02.880 --> 0:12:05.080 not taking them with us, We leave them at the venue. 0:12:05.320 --> 0:12:07.600 Have you figured out what that thing is in us? 0:12:07.640 --> 0:12:10.440 Because my mom has it too, and it's like she's 0:12:10.520 --> 0:12:12.440 she's not a romantic so and then I feel like 0:12:12.440 --> 0:12:14.280 I picked it up from her, like I don't. I 0:12:14.320 --> 0:12:16.240 feel like there's a part of me that wants the 0:12:16.400 --> 0:12:18.760 romance but I don't. But I don't want to see 0:12:18.760 --> 0:12:22.600 it overtly in my face. And I'm more like acts 0:12:22.640 --> 0:12:25.760 of service. Right, we all know the five love languages? No, no, no, 0:12:25.880 --> 0:12:28.520 actually what are they? Because I always forget the fifth one? Okay, 0:12:28.520 --> 0:12:33.320 So acts of service, physical touch, time spent, gifts, and 0:12:33.559 --> 0:12:38.200 words of affirmation, and mine is definitely acts of service 0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:41.240 and maybe words of affirmation, like I don't need to 0:12:41.240 --> 0:12:43.040 hear that I'm great because I know I am, but 0:12:43.400 --> 0:12:45.640 it isn't I see it from my husband like I'm 0:12:45.679 --> 0:12:47.439 really proud of you, or you did a great job. 0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:50.400 We're getting a vasectomy, right, that's an act of that. 0:12:51.160 --> 0:12:55.520 That's why I was like, Wow, you're amazing. There is 0:12:55.559 --> 0:12:57.840 like this period after you get a vasectomy, though, you 0:12:57.880 --> 0:13:00.720 have like sixteen ejaculations that you have to go through 0:13:01.440 --> 0:13:05.480 before the sperm is dead. So we're literally like we 0:13:05.559 --> 0:13:09.400 have one to show during those sixteen you can still 0:13:09.440 --> 0:13:13.800 get pregnant, yes, And did you freeze any eggs? Just 0:13:15.160 --> 0:13:17.679 he actually put some sperm in a in a bank. 0:13:17.840 --> 0:13:20.600 Oh well, there you go. He's not making me do anything. 0:13:20.640 --> 0:13:22.880 I'm telling you, it's amazing. He did all the hard 0:13:22.920 --> 0:13:25.160 he did that part. I did my part. I was 0:13:25.200 --> 0:13:26.679 gonna say he did the hard part, but his part 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:32.199 was definitely not that hard at all. That's so interesting 0:13:32.320 --> 0:13:37.560 that you get sixteen. That's what the toxic number. He said. 0:13:37.559 --> 0:13:41.400 It's like sixteen or like three months something like that. Yeah, 0:13:41.480 --> 0:13:43.360 so I guess it's like in three months, maybe people 0:13:43.400 --> 0:13:46.480 have sex sixteen times. That's what I was, like, whoa, 0:13:47.120 --> 0:13:54.199 we have three kids. That's not happening. So anyways, back 0:13:54.240 --> 0:13:57.640 through the love languages, that's where I am so confused 0:13:57.679 --> 0:14:01.439 at myself, Like Justin is like Joe, he's Mr Romantic. 0:14:01.600 --> 0:14:04.719 And now what I have noticed, and my mom has 0:14:04.760 --> 0:14:07.520 had to train herself with her boyfriend is to accept 0:14:07.720 --> 0:14:11.840 the love right except the romance. Otherwise, we train our 0:14:12.200 --> 0:14:15.920 partners to to not be romantic, and then we start 0:14:16.040 --> 0:14:17.640 looking for it and we're like, wait, you're not being 0:14:17.720 --> 0:14:21.280 romantic anymore? Why are you? Where is that? So I've 0:14:21.280 --> 0:14:24.880 actually had to reel back my like hard shell and 0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:28.080 and accept it and then try out to step outside 0:14:28.080 --> 0:14:30.400 of my comfort zone and send him flowers or like, 0:14:30.640 --> 0:14:32.760 you know, just write little cards and put them under 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:34.920 his pillow, you know, like things that you think of 0:14:35.240 --> 0:14:38.160 people in their late teens do in the early teens. Whatever. 0:14:38.480 --> 0:14:42.400 I like that I didn't really have a boyfriend in 0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:46.440 my early teens. I think that's it's it's really all 0:14:46.480 --> 0:14:49.520 about accepting, you know, like Joe has melted me. Everyone 0:14:49.560 --> 0:14:52.920 says it, everyone like sees it, and I usually I 0:14:52.920 --> 0:14:55.160 would be resistant to that. I'd be like, stop it, 0:14:55.480 --> 0:14:58.120 you know, like, but I've just given in because why not? 0:14:58.360 --> 0:15:00.720 Why fight it? And but I think it's just being 0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:02.640 a tough chick. You want to be a tough chicken, 0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.720 you don't, you know, it's a very common thing for 0:15:05.760 --> 0:15:10.240 anybody who's independent, fears and really successful. You don't show 0:15:10.240 --> 0:15:12.920 a lot of vulnerability because that's not what it took 0:15:12.960 --> 0:15:15.680 to get you where you are. So I think that 0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:18.360 bleeds over into our relationships. What once you know, somebody 0:15:18.440 --> 0:15:21.200 means what they're saying and it's not bullshit. I think 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:23.400 what irks me a lot about that is that it 0:15:23.400 --> 0:15:27.080 feels insincere many times, and when it is finally sincere, 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:29.160 then you can be like Oh, like, I had a 0:15:29.200 --> 0:15:32.640 boyfriend this he he was a real asshole, and he 0:15:32.680 --> 0:15:36.160 would send me flowers like anytime we got into a fight, 0:15:36.560 --> 0:15:39.200 but I didn't. I hated that. It's like, don't send 0:15:39.200 --> 0:15:42.400 me flowers. You say you're sorry and mean it. I'm 0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:45.280 not just like some chick on the side. We're together. 0:15:45.800 --> 0:15:48.040 So when flowers are coming from an act of love 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:50.720 and it's just saying, oh, here, I'm demonstrating more and 0:15:50.720 --> 0:15:53.520 more love to you, then it's easier to receive. I think. 0:15:53.880 --> 0:15:56.640 I agree. Yeah, I always wondered if it was a 0:15:56.720 --> 0:15:59.040 learned behavior from my mom, But I like your explanation. 0:15:59.080 --> 0:16:01.280 But I'm sure has learned from your mom, because your 0:16:01.280 --> 0:16:04.360 mom is a tough cookie. Also, yeah, and yes, yes 0:16:04.360 --> 0:16:07.960 she is. You're a gem. You're a gem, you are 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:11.440 and Joe is such a sweetheart. The two of you together. 0:16:11.480 --> 0:16:13.640 I love it, and I know everybody's expressing it on 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:15.280 social media, like, oh my god, you guys are so 0:16:15.400 --> 0:16:18.240 like it's so true though, it's so sweet. We were 0:16:18.280 --> 0:16:20.320 walking through the city last night and I mean a 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:23.120 dozen people must have run up to us. They're like, 0:16:23.360 --> 0:16:27.480 you don't understand. We love you together. We love you, 0:16:27.560 --> 0:16:29.640 and I'm like we're like, oh thanks, so like you 0:16:29.640 --> 0:16:34.280 don't understand, We're like we do, we understand we're together. 0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:38.480 But it's nice because women especially you know, like that 0:16:38.520 --> 0:16:41.120 are my age or like oh wait, if you melted 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:44.600 and you found someone I was the ice green, then 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:47.640 anybody can. You know, it can happen. And it also 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:50.680 makes me believe in that for everyone. I believe everybody. 0:16:50.680 --> 0:16:53.320 As long as you don't settle and you say like 0:16:53.440 --> 0:16:56.160 these are my standards, these are not moving regardless of 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.920 whether I'm with anyone or not, then somebody will meet 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:02.160 you right up there. And you know, standards with men 0:17:02.240 --> 0:17:05.080 the last few years have had to get lower and 0:17:05.240 --> 0:17:08.680 lower and lower. That's that's why it's so funny that 0:17:08.720 --> 0:17:10.960 I ended up with like, you know, a Filipino man, 0:17:11.040 --> 0:17:13.560 because I was just so out of gas with white guys. 0:17:13.600 --> 0:17:15.680 I was like, listen, I have no more juice left 0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:19.040 for you guys. It's too much. You know, you're to 0:17:19.080 --> 0:17:21.000 a black man. I know, did you have a non 0:17:21.000 --> 0:17:24.840 negotiable list? Like this is my non negotiables and if 0:17:24.960 --> 0:17:26.560 if he doesn't have this, like I'm not even going 0:17:26.600 --> 0:17:28.760 to see him. No. I made a list once with 0:17:28.800 --> 0:17:31.360 Sarah Silverman and She and I and my sister actually 0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:34.800 all made lists because somebody had told me that they 0:17:34.800 --> 0:17:36.520 had made a list and they had met their person. 0:17:36.800 --> 0:17:40.400 That's what I did. You did before you met justin. Yeah, 0:17:41.040 --> 0:17:43.240 it was important. I had just broken up with a guy, 0:17:43.440 --> 0:17:45.760 and then I realized that if I didn't make a list, 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:47.960 I wasn't going to meet the person that I wanted 0:17:48.000 --> 0:17:50.879 to And then I also wanted to be single. And 0:17:51.080 --> 0:17:54.120 I got basically everything on that list. I don't remember 0:17:54.160 --> 0:17:56.480 the list because it was over twelve years ago, but 0:17:56.880 --> 0:17:59.760 I wish I still had that list. Oh yeah, now 0:17:59.840 --> 0:18:01.720 you probably wrote yours in your phone minds in my 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:05.040 notes section on my phone. So my list everything I 0:18:05.119 --> 0:18:07.800 put skiing, and it's like you have to be a skier. 0:18:07.960 --> 0:18:09.600 But I made it. It was a really long list, 0:18:09.640 --> 0:18:11.840 but it wasn't shallow at all, Like it was deep 0:18:11.840 --> 0:18:14.760 stuff like values, morals, la la la. You have to 0:18:14.800 --> 0:18:17.080 be willing to stick your neck out for people. Don't 0:18:17.080 --> 0:18:19.600 be an idiot, you know, the interest in traveling and 0:18:19.640 --> 0:18:22.240 the ability to make it happen and the desire to 0:18:22.280 --> 0:18:23.840 make it happen. But the one thing I put on 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:26.320 my list, said a man with a full head of 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:30.880 hair that was that was the one, the one shallow 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:34.480 thing that I vote, and so I fucking circle that 0:18:35.080 --> 0:18:37.320 and I was just like, I sent it to Joe. 0:18:37.560 --> 0:18:39.760 I'm like, that is so funny that I sent a 0:18:39.840 --> 0:18:42.920 full head of hair, Like I don't even think that 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:45.720 that was important to me. And then obviously it's not, 0:18:46.119 --> 0:18:49.360 which is why we're making Joe a hairpiece. We're not. 0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:57.800 We're not. I would never I only date bald Filipino 0:18:57.880 --> 0:19:00.600 men from now on. That's my that's I think. But 0:19:00.680 --> 0:19:06.159 he looks good, yeah, exactly, Well you'd have to. And 0:19:06.200 --> 0:19:08.280 he has some hair that grows in, but it's he 0:19:08.359 --> 0:19:10.159 just shaves it, which is exactly what I would want 0:19:10.160 --> 0:19:12.200 a man to do, you know, just once things start 0:19:12.200 --> 0:19:16.680 getting dicey, just shave it off. Yes, agreed. Okay, So Catherine, 0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:18.800 tell us what we have in store today. Actually, you know, 0:19:18.880 --> 0:19:21.560 we take callers some of our lives, some right in 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:24.720 and then we just give them life advice. It's really good. 0:19:24.800 --> 0:19:26.280 I think you guys are really good at this. By 0:19:26.320 --> 0:19:32.480 the way, Well we all try, right, yeah, right, Well, 0:19:32.480 --> 0:19:39.320 we have some extremely exciting cheating questions. We have two 0:19:39.320 --> 0:19:43.440 people from the Midwest calling in, Uh, some moms stuff 0:19:43.440 --> 0:19:47.560 dealing with friendship. Oh god, we have some weight loss 0:19:47.600 --> 0:19:51.399 stuff and some booty stuff, all kinds of questions. But 0:19:51.520 --> 0:19:53.560 we'll take a quick break and we'll come back with 0:19:53.640 --> 0:20:01.840 some callers. Okay, sounds good, and we're back. Actually, let's 0:20:01.880 --> 0:20:03.840 talk a little bit about Nicks before we go in, 0:20:03.920 --> 0:20:06.600 because I know you have a partnership with Nicks and 0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:09.800 you're promoting your new lingerie line with them. Tell us 0:20:09.800 --> 0:20:11.879 a little bit about that. First of all your boxes 0:20:11.920 --> 0:20:15.080 in the mail. I cannot wait to shoot that lingerie. 0:20:17.400 --> 0:20:21.480