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Speaker 1: I said something, do world bad? Would you? It's not

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Speaker 1: your mind your sillion pieces? Would you? Banana batta Bana.

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Speaker 2: Guys, gals, non binary pals. Welcome to a minisod episode.

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Speaker 2: I guess you just say minisode. Welcome to a minisode

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Speaker 2: of bananas. I am Kurt Brown Owler.

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Speaker 3: I am Scotti Landis. It is a freezing cold sixty

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Speaker 3: five degrees in Los Angeles. Everybody is wearing snow coats,

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Speaker 3: including Kurt, including.

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Speaker 1: Is that a snow coat?

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Speaker 4: It is?

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Speaker 2: It is a puffy jacket, though I have a puffy

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Speaker 2: jacket because I'm in my I'm in my garage. It's

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Speaker 2: probably fifty eight degrees in my garage.

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Speaker 3: No, it is chilly for LA. And this city is

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Speaker 3: so bizarre and weird. Last night I was driving back

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Speaker 3: to my house and I was just passing so many

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Speaker 3: people walking on the sidewalk in full like jackets, like

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Speaker 3: ant rack hooded, like as if as if there aren't

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Speaker 3: people that live in thirty degrees or less year round.

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Speaker 3: But out here you're like, oh, man, this just isn't

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Speaker 3: gonna cut the mustard.

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Speaker 1: It really is.

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Speaker 2: There's that o man, that there's a there's a there's

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Speaker 2: a meme account that I don't know who runs it.

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Speaker 2: It's called Americana at Brand Meme Americana.

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Speaker 4: It's so funny.

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Speaker 2: It's a mall in Glendale and uh and it always

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Speaker 2: makes it's like uh la la when it gets seventy

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Speaker 2: degrees and then you just see a guy with a

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Speaker 2: like a full beanie on.

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Speaker 1: Like all the way down over his ears.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: People lose their marbles over it, but it's fine. And

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Speaker 3: also it makes it's like our fall. This is the

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Speaker 3: closest we get to a fall. Is just a It's

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Speaker 3: not eighty degrees every day, but it does make me.

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Speaker 3: And this morning I woke up in the bedroom was cold,

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Speaker 3: and I was like, I want to go skiing. I

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Speaker 3: want to go snowboarding, Like so I think this year

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna do it. I don't know if you guys

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Speaker 3: want to take Olive on our first time or I'd

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Speaker 3: love to, but either Big I guess Big Bear would

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Speaker 3: probably be the easiest.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so fast and close, that'd be great. I

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Speaker 1: would love to do.

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Speaker 4: That, all right. I'll let you know.

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Speaker 3: Maybe I'll get a little airbed and breakfast and we

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Speaker 3: can figure it out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, babe, Actually that'll be fun.

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Speaker 3: Because then we could just do bananas at Big Bear

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Speaker 3: and be have a little altitude sickness or whatever.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that'd be great.

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Speaker 4: It's higher up there than you think.

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Speaker 3: Every time I'm up there in like hiking or doing whatever,

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Speaker 3: I get like winded and I'm like huh, and then

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Speaker 3: it's I don't know, five thousand feet.

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Speaker 1: Wow, I had no idea was that far up?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? Man, pretty wild, pretty wild.

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Speaker 2: In case you're not familiar with many sols, we take

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Speaker 2: your confessions, your stories, tell our stories on top.

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Speaker 1: So, Scotty, what do we got today?

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Speaker 4: So I have a confession.

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Speaker 3: We have so many confessions, but I have a hunch

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Speaker 3: that we're gonna through one confession. One story. It was

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Speaker 3: like party fouls or you broke it but I didn't

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Speaker 3: buy it, something like that. Okay, here's one and it

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Speaker 3: starts off really really and these are always anonymous, so

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Speaker 3: it says, this is my favorite podcast. Here's a story. Actually,

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Speaker 3: I guess this is just a story. Here's a story.

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Speaker 3: When I was in college, smoking was still allowed inside

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Speaker 3: certain buildings. That's how old I am. One of the

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Speaker 3: areas was the ground floor of the main library. Halfway

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Speaker 3: through the year, the administration decided that we would no

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Speaker 3: longer be allowed to smoke inside of the building because

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Speaker 3: punk rock rebels without a cause, we were. We decided

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Speaker 3: to stay to sit in to protest the decision. We

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Speaker 3: put flyers up, I know.

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Speaker 5: Justary in the library, but also at that age, you're

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Speaker 5: just like, if we're going to take a stand, it's

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Speaker 5: now we're never guys.

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Speaker 4: That's exactly it.

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Speaker 3: And you just reminded me of one a story that'll

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Speaker 3: tell Let me just open a little thing here. Okay,

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Speaker 3: So anyways, they said, we decided to stay, just sit

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Speaker 3: in to protest the decision and put flyers up all

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Speaker 3: around campus. When the big day came, we blocked the

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Speaker 3: hallways and the floors. Very soon after, the head librarian arrived.

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Speaker 3: He was an older hippie type with a ponytail. He

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Speaker 3: sat in front of hus and said, okay, what are

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Speaker 3: your demands? And someone said, we want to smoke in

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Speaker 3: the library. It is so collegiate. It is like such

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Speaker 3: a college protest, Like everything else is taken care of,

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Speaker 3: but this little luxury that's killing you and the people

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Speaker 3: around you. We want to smoke in the library. And

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Speaker 3: he said, the ponytailed man head librarian, well, that isn't

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Speaker 3: going to happen anything else. Being unprepared for the scenario,

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Speaker 3: we just stared blankly at him and then everybody he

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Speaker 3: got up and left. Really, they didn't have any other

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Speaker 3: demands that everyone left. Slacktivism at its best. Love you guys.

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Speaker 3: Oh that is so funny.

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Speaker 1: This is a beautiful gen X story.

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Speaker 4: It really is. It so is.

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Speaker 3: When I was at UMass, we had some pretty serious

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Speaker 3: budget cuts for a couple of the years, and like

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Speaker 3: the all that I saw was that they would double

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Speaker 3: print on paper, so if you got a syllabus, it

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Speaker 3: would be double printed on both sides. Who gives a crap,

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Speaker 3: that's great, Like nobody cares. They basically were like, let's

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Speaker 3: use less waste, and in uber liberal crunchy Amherst, you

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Speaker 3: would think that that would be okay. One day I

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Speaker 3: was walking to class and I've mentioned this guy probably

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Speaker 3: two years ago on the podcast when I was a

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Speaker 3: telemarketer up there, but his name was Corey, but he

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Speaker 3: lied and said his name was Corey Charisma. When he

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Speaker 3: would call people, and he was excellent at it, and

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Speaker 3: he would when he would call people, he'd go, hey,

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Speaker 3: sorry to bother you. During dinner this is Corey charisma

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Speaker 3: for Country Insurance, and then people would talk to him

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Speaker 3: because he just sounded like shaggy and kind of a

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Speaker 3: stone dude. So one day, because we worked together, he

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Speaker 3: got around campus on like a longboard along skateboard and

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Speaker 3: then his two dogs would pull him. He had two

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Speaker 3: like asses and he would have them on the sues

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Speaker 3: and they would pull them through campus.

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Speaker 1: This is very Corey charisma.

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Speaker 3: Cory charisma to a TA if you knew this guy.

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Speaker 3: And so he's like, what's up, Scooter, And I'm like,

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Speaker 3: what's up?

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Speaker 4: Man? I was like, what's going on?

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Speaker 3: He goes, we're walking out of class, and I go

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Speaker 3: for what he goes budget cuts and I go okay,

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Speaker 3: And then what he goes we're walking out at four and.

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Speaker 4: I was like, then, what's everybody gonna do.

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Speaker 3: He's like it's because of the budget cuts. And I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: but what what does this do? Like we paid for

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Speaker 3: these classes? I like, I just paid off my student

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Speaker 3: debts like five years ago, and it's like, so they

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Speaker 3: cut class. So I went to class because I was like,

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Speaker 3: you guys are dorks. So I went to class and

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Speaker 3: then I saw this group that gathered and they didn't know,

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Speaker 3: like they didn't have a purpose. So when I read

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Speaker 3: this story, I was like, I know exactly. It's like,

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Speaker 3: so what did they do? They walked to the bursar's office.

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Speaker 3: First of all, I still don't know what a bursar's

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Speaker 3: office is.

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Speaker 1: Is it's it's it's purser or burser.

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Speaker 4: It's burser with a with a B B.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, still don't know what that is.

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Speaker 2: Don't If it's a purser, I assume he owns he

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Speaker 2: holds the purse of the university.

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Speaker 1: Yes, a bursar. I have no idea he holds the

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Speaker 1: burse I know.

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Speaker 4: So these I don't know.

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Speaker 3: Let's say it's one hundred and fifty or two hundred

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Speaker 3: pissed off students who really don't have anything to worry about,

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Speaker 3: walk I don't know, half a mile probably last quarter

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Speaker 3: mile to the administration office. And then they get there

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Speaker 3: and they all go in and like, you know, the

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Speaker 3: people working reception there are students, those are like student employees,

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Speaker 3: and they're like hi, and they're like, we're sick of

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Speaker 3: these budget cuts or whatever. And then all these people

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Speaker 3: in the back are channing let us in, just because

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Speaker 3: they physically can't get through the doors, and the people

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Speaker 3: on the inside are going there's just no room. You

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Speaker 3: guys are allowed in, the doors are open, there's just

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Speaker 3: no room for anybody. And I just peeled off. And

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Speaker 3: it was like a level of activism that I think

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Speaker 3: obviously you and I we try to be as good

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Speaker 3: as citizens as possible and support as many causes as

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Speaker 3: we can, but there sometimes is a level of activism

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Speaker 3: like I don't know, we want to smoke in the library.

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Speaker 4: Just there's no win here. You've already lost. Just accept

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Speaker 4: the l and move on.

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Speaker 1: Just accept it.

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Speaker 2: I remember this was probably two thousand, probably around two

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Speaker 2: thousand ish, and for it was Rudy Giuliani was mayor

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Speaker 2: of New York City.

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Speaker 4: Oh great, and what a guy.

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Speaker 2: He Yeah, and like we knew then he was a

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Speaker 2: piece of shit, but I think he's gone even more

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Speaker 2: crazy since then.

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Speaker 1: But his deal was.

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Speaker 2: That he strictly enforced these like cool quality of life violations,

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Speaker 2: which meant like a drinking on the street or peeing

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Speaker 2: on the street, things like that, which is you know,

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Speaker 2: they they that's just a way of saying, like we

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Speaker 2: can arrest poor people for no reason. And one of

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Speaker 2: the things that he was. He did too, was like

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Speaker 2: you couldn't dance in a bar that didn't have it.

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Speaker 4: Remember this license, absolutely.

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Speaker 2: And these dancing licenses were like this racist law from

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Speaker 2: when they wanted to prevent white women from going downtown

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Speaker 2: up to Harlem during the Harlem Renaissance where they're like

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Speaker 2: dancing in jazz clubs. So they like created this fucking

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Speaker 2: what was it called. There was a license, It was

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Speaker 2: not called a dancing license.

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Speaker 4: It was called.

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Speaker 1: If you don't have a cabaret license.

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Speaker 2: So literally, if you were in a bar and it

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Speaker 2: was like three in the morning and somebody put on

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Speaker 2: a jukebox and you start dancing the bar time be like,

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Speaker 2: don't do that because we could get shut down.

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Speaker 4: It was crazy.

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Speaker 1: Remember that.

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Speaker 2: And another thing that he did this piece of ship.

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Speaker 2: I used to always go on critical mass bike rides. Sure,

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Speaker 2: so it'd be like two thousand people on bikes would

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Speaker 2: just ride through Manhattan for like two and a half

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Speaker 2: hours that there would all be a group. So it

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Speaker 2: would be like this is this is traffic, Like bikes

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Speaker 2: are traffic, and Julie it drove Juliani crazy that they

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Speaker 2: would exist. So then like he would dedicate hundreds and

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Speaker 2: hundreds of police officers to come and then set up

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Speaker 2: like these stings where they just would try and arrest

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Speaker 2: hundreds of people for just riding their bicycle.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, totally cool.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so insane. And it was during this time we

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Speaker 2: were just riding our bikes. It was me and my

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Speaker 2: girlfriend at the time, and we saw some cops at

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Speaker 2: the end of the block and we like had peeled

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Speaker 2: off from the main pack because it was like, there's

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Speaker 2: just too many cops.

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Speaker 1: I don't like this.

224
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Speaker 2: And a cop was just standing on the corner and

225
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Speaker 2: we rode past him and the cops said hey, stop

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Speaker 2: and so then my girlfriend at the time stopped and

227
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Speaker 2: I was like, don't stop. And then she stopped and

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Speaker 2: he came over and then started arresting her, and I

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Speaker 2: was like, oh man. And so then I turned around

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Speaker 2: and like came back to her and they're like, oh,

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Speaker 2: you want to get arrested to buddy, and I was

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Speaker 2: like all right.

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Speaker 1: And so then they.

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Speaker 2: Actually physically arrest for just riding our bikes, physically arrested us, insane,

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Speaker 2: confiscated our bikes total, sent us to a jail in

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Speaker 2: the Lower East Side, where we stayed overnight in a

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Speaker 2: jail cell with all just people who had been riding

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Speaker 2: their fucking bicycle.

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Speaker 1: You're kidding, No, not kidding, And.

240
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Speaker 2: Then we don't and then they just released us in

241
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Speaker 2: the morning and we were in there for like eight hours.

242
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Speaker 2: It was insane. And then there was a class action

243
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Speaker 2: lawsuit for all of those people who got arrested for

244
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Speaker 2: riding their bike, and then we all got like one

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Speaker 2: thousand dollars.

246
00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:53,520
Speaker 4: Oh shit, yeah, that's the best thing ever.

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Speaker 2: Eight years later, I got a checked for one thousand

248
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Speaker 2: dollars because I was part of a class action lawsuit

249
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Speaker 2: against the New York City Police Department for arresting people

250
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Speaker 2: for riding their bikes.

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Speaker 1: And it finally felt.

252
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Speaker 2: Like, oh crazy, It was so awesome, and it was

253
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Speaker 2: a time that I really needed money, but it was

254
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Speaker 2: like millions, hundreds of millions of dollars that New York

255
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Speaker 2: City Police Department had to pay.

256
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Speaker 3: In two thousand and six, so I'd already been living

257
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Speaker 3: in Brooklyn for a year or two and I had

258
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Speaker 3: people would always come up. It's same thing like when

259
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Speaker 3: I first moved to LA maybe thirty people came out

260
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Speaker 3: because they had never been to LA and they just

261
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Speaker 3: crashed with me.

262
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Speaker 4: Like I still have an air mattress that I haven't

263
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Speaker 4: used in five years.

264
00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:33,440
Speaker 3: But there was a time that thing was getting like

265
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,760
Speaker 3: monthly use where people would be like, can I come

266
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Speaker 3: crash from That's.

267
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Speaker 1: So crazy a good person. Your apartment is so tiny?

268
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Speaker 3: Yes, I know, And I'm like, all right, guys, so

269
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,640
Speaker 3: you could take over this living area. I'll be in

270
00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:47,920
Speaker 3: the bedroom bathroom unit.

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Speaker 1: I'll have to step over you to get coffee in

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Speaker 1: the morning.

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Speaker 4: Exactly, And I did, and they did.

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Speaker 3: But oh, so I was living in Brooklyn and a

275
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Speaker 3: bunch of people are coming up from Maryland and they

276
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:02,200
Speaker 3: I would them around different things, and one friend came

277
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Speaker 3: up and he's like, do you like living here?

278
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:06,080
Speaker 4: I was like, yeah, that's great, and he's like, what

279
00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:06,880
Speaker 4: do you like about New York?

280
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Speaker 3: I don't get why everybody loves it so much, you know,

281
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,600
Speaker 3: like some people just have that taste in their mouth.

282
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Speaker 3: I was like, well, just anything can happen. It's super fun.

283
00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:15,360
Speaker 3: And he's like, I guess. And so we walk over

284
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Speaker 3: the Brooklyn Bridge, which is beautiful, and we're walking near

285
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:22,720
Speaker 3: J Street Burrough Hall, and I hear like bass and

286
00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:26,240
Speaker 3: music and then on this empty street, I would say

287
00:13:26,720 --> 00:13:33,040
Speaker 3: one hundred motorcycles, probably fifty four wheelers, a bunch of

288
00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:37,760
Speaker 3: SUVs with spinners, and it's all black folks. Every single

289
00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:40,880
Speaker 3: person on every vehicle is a black woman or a

290
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:45,040
Speaker 3: black dude, and standing out of an open moon roof

291
00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:50,160
Speaker 3: is the rapper. Little Kim, Lil Kim had gotten she

292
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:52,520
Speaker 3: was going to go to jail for perjury for a

293
00:13:52,559 --> 00:13:54,640
Speaker 3: case that had happened like five years earlier, but it

294
00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:58,040
Speaker 3: finally came up, and so that's how they drove that

295
00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:01,320
Speaker 3: group of people drove her to prison and like a

296
00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:05,240
Speaker 3: parade of motorcycles doing wheelies, four wheelers, and.

297
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Speaker 4: She was just something little Yeah, it was the best.

298
00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,320
Speaker 4: She's just dancing. You could spot her.

299
00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:13,960
Speaker 3: She had like she looked amazing, or she had like

300
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,800
Speaker 3: this beautiful like wig on and she just was like oh,

301
00:14:16,840 --> 00:14:18,880
Speaker 3: and like that's how they took her to jail to

302
00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:20,360
Speaker 3: do a year and a day. I looked it up

303
00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:23,280
Speaker 3: later and my friend's like, no shit, like anything does

304
00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:23,920
Speaker 3: happen here.

305
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:25,640
Speaker 4: But we're like it's a little gim. It's a little

306
00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:28,560
Speaker 4: gim just blasting biggie smalls going by.

307
00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:31,720
Speaker 3: It was like if you had to go to jail

308
00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:33,600
Speaker 3: for a year and a hundred of your friends are

309
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,120
Speaker 3: like now throwing you a parade.

310
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Speaker 1: That's It's the best.

311
00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:40,720
Speaker 4: It was so really shit, it was so great. Love

312
00:14:40,760 --> 00:14:41,280
Speaker 4: her all right.

313
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:44,520
Speaker 3: This one is a confession that had nothing to do

314
00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,360
Speaker 3: with either one of the topics. And you guys have

315
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,240
Speaker 3: been animals. You're welcome to send confessions anytime we need

316
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:54,960
Speaker 3: some anonymous just nothing murder, no assaults. But I think

317
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,200
Speaker 3: you will love this one. Kurt something about this one

318
00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,040
Speaker 3: spoke to me and said, Curtie B will love this.

319
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,000
Speaker 3: When I was a kid, maybe around six years old,

320
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,400
Speaker 3: my mom took me with her to the grocery store.

321
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:09,240
Speaker 3: While at the store, I was extremely hungry and complained.

322
00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:11,479
Speaker 4: About it a lot. When after what felt.

323
00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:13,640
Speaker 3: Like an excruciating amount of time, we were finally in

324
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:16,960
Speaker 3: line to check out, but the line was very long

325
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:20,320
Speaker 3: and moving very slowly. As I stood there waiting with her,

326
00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:23,400
Speaker 3: I realized that at eye height to me was a

327
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:33,240
Speaker 3: container of baguettes bag at stand at Yes, the baguettes

328
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:37,520
Speaker 3: little and butt pieces were completely sticking out, and the

329
00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:41,280
Speaker 3: packaging didn't fully encompass them. You could guess what my

330
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:48,200
Speaker 3: hungry mind tempted me to do so, regardless of knowing

331
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:51,040
Speaker 3: I absolutely should not bite the top off the bread.

332
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:56,040
Speaker 3: I did, and it was so good until I looked

333
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,360
Speaker 3: up and locked eyes with the man who had seen

334
00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:01,840
Speaker 3: the whole thing. Was laughing so hard, and I was

335
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,680
Speaker 3: instantly mortified and red in the face. After that, I

336
00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:07,280
Speaker 3: quickly looked away and tried hard to be invisible, which

337
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:08,680
Speaker 3: is such a little kid thing to do, like just

338
00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:09,920
Speaker 3: tuck behind your parents' leg.

339
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:11,280
Speaker 4: Yeah.

340
00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:14,120
Speaker 3: After that, I quickly looked away and tried very hard

341
00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:17,680
Speaker 3: to be invisible. I had almost forgotten about the intense embarrassment.

342
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,160
Speaker 3: After my mom checked out and we made her way

343
00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:24,760
Speaker 3: back to the car when I saw the same man again.

344
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,400
Speaker 3: This time he was sitting in his car with a

345
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:31,000
Speaker 3: buddy and seemed to be very animatedly telling him something.

346
00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:34,120
Speaker 3: I think he was talking about the baguette fighting. I

347
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:36,440
Speaker 3: began to look away when he looked over, we locked

348
00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:40,280
Speaker 3: eyes for a second time. He quickly nudged his friend

349
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:42,680
Speaker 3: and pointed at me, and they both erupted and laughter.

350
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:47,320
Speaker 3: A six year old, needless to say, this moment has

351
00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:50,040
Speaker 3: haunted me my entire life.

352
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:53,400
Speaker 2: You are absolved, Oh my god, you don't have anything

353
00:16:53,440 --> 00:16:56,520
Speaker 2: to be absolved for. That's the funniest God, that's the

354
00:16:57,200 --> 00:17:01,400
Speaker 2: solution to I'm a kid and I'm Hungrydo grocery stores

355
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,360
Speaker 2: just to bite the.

356
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:05,080
Speaker 1: Top off of a bag head? Because yeah, why those

357
00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 1: bagette butts get out? Put the top on, folks.

358
00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:09,920
Speaker 4: You can't pump up the.

359
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,600
Speaker 2: End of that goddamn bag at Yeah, you ran out

360
00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:13,600
Speaker 2: of paper halfway through.

361
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:16,440
Speaker 4: Maybe bake the baget a little shorter. Has anybody thought

362
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:16,679
Speaker 4: of that?

363
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:21,040
Speaker 2: I feel like they make bags of all sizes, not

364
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,280
Speaker 2: just one and a half inches shorter than the fucking

365
00:17:24,359 --> 00:17:25,560
Speaker 2: baguette size.

366
00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:27,960
Speaker 4: It's there's an old there's an old comedian.

367
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:29,879
Speaker 3: I can't remember who it was, but they had the

368
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:33,160
Speaker 3: joke about light bulbs come in like the most flimsy

369
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:36,080
Speaker 3: packaging of anything, but then you buy like batteries and

370
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:39,040
Speaker 3: Amazon and it's packed in like six inches of styrofoam.

371
00:17:39,280 --> 00:17:43,080
Speaker 1: Oh, I want to know who that comes so so funny.

372
00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:45,800
Speaker 3: It's like twenty year old I remember from like martinage Eers.

373
00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:47,679
Speaker 3: But it's so true, Like you buy two light bulbs

374
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:51,560
Speaker 3: at Low's and it's just like the thinnest, like somewhere

375
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:55,560
Speaker 3: between typing paper and cardboard, holding them together without straps,

376
00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:57,320
Speaker 3: just loosely holding it loose.

377
00:17:57,359 --> 00:17:59,520
Speaker 1: If you just push it just falls right out.

378
00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:01,160
Speaker 4: Oh good.

379
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:04,600
Speaker 3: I remember trying, like when you were young, you know,

380
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:07,000
Speaker 3: when we were middle school or whatever, and you're trying

381
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:10,639
Speaker 3: to be badass, and you'd like open a Snapple in

382
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:12,840
Speaker 3: the grocery store and drink it while you were walking

383
00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:15,399
Speaker 3: around and then hide it back on the shelves. And

384
00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:17,480
Speaker 3: I can remember getting busted once where the person's like,

385
00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:18,640
Speaker 3: are you gonna pay for that Snapple?

386
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,600
Speaker 4: And you're like, uh, yes, and.

387
00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:24,399
Speaker 3: Then you kind of realize, like surveillance cameras exist, and

388
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:26,960
Speaker 3: also you're just being a jerk. And back then Snapple

389
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:30,600
Speaker 3: was probably ninety nine cents, but you felt like a

390
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:32,760
Speaker 3: little rebel, you felt, so I kind of get what

391
00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:33,640
Speaker 3: she was going for.

392
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:38,600
Speaker 2: Also, we got a message on our DMS because we

393
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,600
Speaker 2: were talking about Snapple facts. I guess yes, And we

394
00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:44,240
Speaker 2: were wondering if the Snapple facts were real. And this

395
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:49,760
Speaker 2: person was a copywriter and had to verify They worked

396
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:52,760
Speaker 2: for the company that Snapple used to make the Snapple facts.

397
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:55,679
Speaker 2: They had to verify over five hundred facts and all

398
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:56,480
Speaker 2: of them are true.

399
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:58,119
Speaker 4: Yeah, isn't that interesting?

400
00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:02,920
Speaker 3: I at my leanest, I had worked on like two

401
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,080
Speaker 3: or three jobs in a row in New York and TV,

402
00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:07,640
Speaker 3: including two that you were on Mega Drive and Money

403
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 3: from Strangers, and I worked on one other pilot, and

404
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:14,480
Speaker 3: then after that year, I was told that there was

405
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:17,080
Speaker 3: another job lined up, and then there was another MTV

406
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,040
Speaker 3: job in Las Vegas, and I ended up they both

407
00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:22,080
Speaker 3: fell apart, not because of me, because of other people.

408
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:26,119
Speaker 3: So suddenly I was watching my bank account go down again,

409
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,199
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh man, I'm gonna have to

410
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:31,760
Speaker 3: wait tables again or Valet again or do something like that.

411
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:36,119
Speaker 3: And then I got two interviews. One was for The

412
00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:39,879
Speaker 3: Love Connection. They were bringing back the Love Connection, and

413
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:41,439
Speaker 3: then the other one was for who wants to be

414
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,920
Speaker 3: a Millionaire, And at the time who wants to be

415
00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:47,800
Speaker 3: a Millionaire? I think Regis had just stopped. And then

416
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,879
Speaker 3: I think it was Meredith Vieira, or maybe it was

417
00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,440
Speaker 3: like Jimmy Kimmel. Somebody was guest hosting. But they wanted

418
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:56,760
Speaker 3: to hire new question writers and that process was so

419
00:19:57,240 --> 00:20:01,359
Speaker 3: difficult to get the job as it's still the hardest job. Yeah,

420
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,480
Speaker 3: but they would be like, come in with ten trivia

421
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:07,000
Speaker 3: questions and then so you're like, oh, that's easy, and

422
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,280
Speaker 3: you look stuff up and then you had to write

423
00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:12,560
Speaker 3: for each one three, three to five different ways you

424
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:17,040
Speaker 3: would verify each question and then you couldn't like repeat yourself,

425
00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:20,800
Speaker 3: so you couldn't say, like the date the Titanic sunk,

426
00:20:20,840 --> 00:20:25,159
Speaker 3: and you go. I would check Encyclopedia Britannica. I would

427
00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:29,000
Speaker 3: call the natural at the American History Museum.

428
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:32,560
Speaker 1: And I was something else, text James Cameron, yes, yes.

429
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:38,360
Speaker 3: Exactly, and phone call Leonardo DiCaprio and ask him will

430
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:41,480
Speaker 3: he paint me like a French girl? It was, but

431
00:20:41,520 --> 00:20:44,880
Speaker 3: I didn't get the job, and I was like crestfallen.

432
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,320
Speaker 3: I was like, oh shit, back to the salt mines

433
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:50,000
Speaker 3: here we go. And I remember as soon as they

434
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,879
Speaker 3: started grilling me, I thought about Jeopardy. I thought about

435
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,880
Speaker 3: all the trivia games that are on television, and that

436
00:20:55,880 --> 00:21:00,399
Speaker 3: there are these nameless, faceless writers just having to reove

437
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:01,560
Speaker 3: all of these.

438
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:04,080
Speaker 2: Things because it's money, because it's money, and people will sue.

439
00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:04,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

440
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,320
Speaker 3: And then on the Newlywed Game, I went in Cherry

441
00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:10,439
Speaker 3: Shepherd or somebody was rebooting the Newlywed Game, and the

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00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:12,800
Speaker 3: only question they asked me in the interview they were like, oh,

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Speaker 3: you've done some game show stuff.

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Speaker 4: I'm like, yeah, pretty much.

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Speaker 3: And they were like, can you just write down ten

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Speaker 3: different terms for making whoopee? And I was like yeah,

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Speaker 3: And so I just sat there on the fly and

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Speaker 3: you were like, you know, like.

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Speaker 4: Bumping bagels.

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Speaker 3: You would just say like any dumb thing to be

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Speaker 3: like and then.

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Speaker 4: That was it.

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Speaker 3: That was a whole job interview. I had to write

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Speaker 3: ten or fifteen different terms for that were TV safe

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Speaker 3: for saying when you're making whoopie, Oh I love it.

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Speaker 3: I was bummed. I didn't get that too. They were like, guys,

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Speaker 3: it's writers guild. It pays really well. And I was like, yes, anyway,

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Speaker 3: I still enjoy those shows.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, sadly, no more, no more, and this is

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Speaker 2: no more to this episode, this minisode of Banana.

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Speaker 1: Thank you all for listening. Thank you exactly right.

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Speaker 2: Thank you Katie Levine, Lisa Maggot, our human intern. Thank

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Speaker 2: you to you, Scotty, Thank you to you, Kurtie B.

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Speaker 3: And keep those confessions and stories coming The Bananas Podcast

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Speaker 3: at gmail dot com or the Bananas Podcast on Instagram.

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Speaker 4: We'd love to hear from you. Bananas. Bananas is an

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Speaker 4: exactly right media production.

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Speaker 1: Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine.

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Speaker 3: The catchy Bananas theme song was composed and performed by Kahan.

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Speaker 1: Artwork for Bananas was designed by Travis Millard.

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Speaker 3: And our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and

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Speaker 3: Georgia Hartstart

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Speaker 2: And Lisa Maggott is our full human, not a robot

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Speaker 2: intern Banas