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Speaker 1: I just announced all my tour dates. It's called the

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Speaker 1: Height and Mighty Tour. I'm coming to Washington, d c Norfolk, Virginia, Madison, Wisconsin, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Detroit, Michigan, Cleveland, Columbus,

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Speaker 1: and Cincinnati, Ohio, Denver, Colorado, Portland, Maine, Providence, Rhode Island, Springfield, Massachusetts, Chicago,

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Speaker 1: of Course, Indianapolis, Indiana, Louisville, Kentucky, Albuquerque, Masa, Arizona, Kansas City, Missouri,

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Speaker 1: Saint Louis, Missouri, Minneapolis, Minnesota, Nashville, Tennessee, Charlotte, North Carolina, Durham,

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Speaker 1: North of Carolina, Saratoga, California, Monterey, California, Modeesto, California, and

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Speaker 1: port Chester, New York, Boston, Massachusetts, Portland, Oregon, and Seattle, Washington.

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Speaker 1: I will be touring from February through June, So go

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Speaker 1: get your tickets now. If you want to come see

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Speaker 1: me perform, I will be on the High and Mighty Tour. Hi, Catherine,

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Speaker 1: do you hear my voice?

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Speaker 2: I can hear your voice, Miss Critics Choice Award host.

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Speaker 2: You absolutely crushed it.

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Speaker 3: Oh, thank you. I had such a good time at

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Speaker 3: the Critics Choice Awards.

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Speaker 1: I can't believe how I can't believe my dresses and

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Speaker 1: my tucks and the way I looked. I was like,

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Speaker 1: what I saw pictures of myself. I'm like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I can't believe that I'm fifty years.

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Speaker 3: Old and I look better than I did when I

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Speaker 3: was thirty five.

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Speaker 1: Every woman that is listening to this, you need to

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Speaker 1: know how much better everything keeps getting like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: my body, my face, everything looks better.

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Speaker 3: I'm so pleased.

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Speaker 2: And I have to tell you, I love the way

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Speaker 2: you look at a tuxs. You know this already, but like,

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Speaker 2: I love it.

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Speaker 3: That was my not to Diane Keaton, but I loved

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Speaker 3: it too.

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Speaker 1: I felt like I felt like a real fucking bitch

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Speaker 1: in that tux.

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Speaker 3: That's the best way.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was super fun. I'm here in New York

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Speaker 1: City getting ready to do some press. I'm doing Kelly

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Speaker 1: Clarkson and I'm doing Jimmy fallon tomorrow night to promote

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Speaker 1: my High and Mighty tour.

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Speaker 3: Tickets are on sale, people, get your tickets.

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Speaker 1: The tour jumps off in DC in February, so get

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Speaker 1: your tickets.

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Speaker 3: And we have a fun guest today.

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Speaker 1: You know her from It's always sunny in Philadelphia Hacks

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Speaker 1: and her new show High Potential.

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Speaker 3: So please welcome Caitlin Olsin.

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Speaker 4: Hi.

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Speaker 3: Oh look it's here. Hi, Kaitlin Olsin.

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Speaker 5: Oh my god. I can't believe I've never met you before.

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Speaker 5: This is crazy.

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Speaker 6: I know.

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Speaker 1: I was watching you in High Potential the other night

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Speaker 1: doing your detective work.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, have I met her or not remembered? And

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Speaker 3: I'm like, no, I would remember your energy because I

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Speaker 3: love your energy.

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Speaker 1: Every time you're in a scene, in any of the

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Speaker 1: things that you do, you light up the room and

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Speaker 1: that is just like, no, I mean it, I mean it.

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Speaker 1: You're just so light filled and I just love that

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Speaker 1: about you. So congrats on being light.

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Speaker 5: Oh my, thank you very much. I've never been congratulated

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Speaker 5: on that before and I really appreciate it.

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Speaker 1: Well, there's a lot of things that are going to

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Speaker 1: happen today that have never happened to you before.

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Speaker 5: I can't wait.

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Speaker 1: First of all, I can't believe It's Always Sunny has

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Speaker 1: been on for twenty fucking years or twenty seasons?

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Speaker 3: Is it twenty years?

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Speaker 5: It's twenty years.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So that's crazy. That's like two lifetimes of television.

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Speaker 5: It's getting weird, Like for a few years ago, it

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Speaker 5: was exciting. We're like, oh, we're breaking records, and now

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Speaker 5: it's like, well, now we're just old and weird.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's probably.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not saying it is getting weird, but

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Speaker 1: I can understand what you're saying about it getting weird.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think the main reason you have to

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Speaker 1: be always grateful to that show is because you met

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Speaker 1: your husband.

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Speaker 3: So like, if it weren't for that.

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Speaker 1: Then you can't have any mixed feelings about that.

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Speaker 5: I have zero mixed feelings about it. I met my husband,

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Speaker 5: I've got two kids. It's the best thing that ever

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Speaker 5: happened to me. But also, you don't want to overstay.

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Speaker 5: You're welcome, you know what I mean. So at what

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Speaker 5: point am I like, I should probably irish exit. Should

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Speaker 5: I just leave the show and not tell anyone.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if you're talking about your marriage or

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Speaker 1: the show, but copy that either way, either.

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Speaker 5: Way would be very exciting in a fresh start.

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Speaker 1: You guys met the first year and you obviously hooked

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Speaker 1: up right away, Is that right?

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Speaker 3: Or you tell us what happened.

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Speaker 5: I mean, in the scheme of things, it was right away,

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Speaker 5: but it felt like a lifetime I. He loves the

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Speaker 5: story that I definitely was interested in him and took

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Speaker 5: every opportunity to be at a party where there was

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Speaker 5: alcohol to find myself like touching him with some part

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Speaker 5: of my body, just getting really in his space. And

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Speaker 5: he was like, okay, this is this is unprofessional. And

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Speaker 5: I was like, excuse me, I'm flirting with you and

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Speaker 5: I didn't understand it. And then I just hammered him

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Speaker 5: with it, you know, I.

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Speaker 3: Just and then you hammered me alcohol, right.

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Speaker 5: And then I hammered him. Well, in the end, he

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Speaker 5: hammered me. Let's just be very clear. There was a

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Speaker 5: flip that switched.

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Speaker 1: My friend said that to me the other day and

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Speaker 1: I was staying with my friend Kat, and she's like,

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Speaker 1: did you ever bang that guy?

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Speaker 3: I go, what?

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Speaker 1: Who talks like that? I go, first of all, I

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Speaker 1: go bang him? And she goes, yeah, you never say bang.

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Speaker 3: I go no, I don't. I don't ever say that.

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Speaker 7: Bank.

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Speaker 1: By the way, you're the one getting banged. I'm not

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Speaker 1: ben She goes, that.

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Speaker 3: Depends how you look at it. I'm like, well, I'm

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Speaker 3: definitely not banging men. When I have sex with them,

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Speaker 3: they're banging me.

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Speaker 5: Thank you very much.

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Speaker 1: So your husband's Rob McElhenny, right, but he goes by

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Speaker 1: Rob Mac.

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Speaker 3: Now did he change his name?

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Speaker 5: He's yeah, he's made. He made a big thing about it.

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Speaker 5: He changed his name and now he's Rob Mac. And

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Speaker 5: I have two kids who are stuck with macilhenny.

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Speaker 1: So well, he was actually originally Rob McElhenny the third.

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Speaker 1: So your kids, right, isn't that his real real name?

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Speaker 5: There's a whole there's a whole thing. His name has

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Speaker 5: been a subject of great grief for him the entire our,

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Speaker 5: entire marriage, and I think his entire life. There's a

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Speaker 5: lot of misunderstanding. I think on his birth certificate it's

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Speaker 5: just Robert McElhenny, but they put a space between the

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Speaker 5: mac and the el henny, I think accidentally. And so

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Speaker 5: that's been really fun for me trying to figure out

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Speaker 5: what because I have that technically as my last name,

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Speaker 5: I don't use it, but it's like on my you know,

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Speaker 5: passport and stuff. But then his dad and his grandpa

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Speaker 5: were Robert, but they have middle names and he does,

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Speaker 5: so he's not technically a third But I don't care anymore.

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Speaker 5: I just bored myself for the last thirty seconds. China

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Speaker 5: I don't care. Rob Mack, that's his name. It's easy,

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Speaker 5: it's it's he's great again. We're stuck with mackelhoney. But

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Speaker 5: that's a subject for another time.

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Speaker 1: So how did you keep it a secret from the

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Speaker 1: other cast members until you decided to go public with

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Speaker 1: your relationship.

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Speaker 5: Well, we were just in our trailers a lot, and

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Speaker 5: we just don't I don't know. We thought for sure

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Speaker 5: that they were going to find out because we thought

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Speaker 5: it was really obvious because we were being very flirty

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Speaker 5: and we would travel for work back then, this is

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Speaker 5: before we had kids, so we would be staying in

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Speaker 5: hotels in Philadelphia and New York, and we'd always end

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Speaker 5: up in each other's hotel rooms and like getting off

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Speaker 5: on the wrong floor with two cups of coffee and

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Speaker 5: be seen by them and be like, I don't know,

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Speaker 5: I'm not great with floors. I don't know. They had

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Speaker 5: no idea though we kept it secret for a whole season.

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Speaker 1: Wow, Well that's impressible, especially in Hollywood terms, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean.

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Speaker 3: I mean, those things are pretty obvious.

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Speaker 5: Stay together for a whole season is impressive.

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Speaker 1: Well, staying together for twenty seasons it is even more impressive.

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Speaker 6: I know.

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Speaker 1: I read that you went to a baseball game while

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Speaker 1: you were in labor.

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Speaker 5: Well, I was planning a home birth. That's listen, I

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Speaker 5: apologize already, and this is going to be irritating. I

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Speaker 5: was planning a home birth. So my midwife was like,

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Speaker 5: you're going to go into labor. You're going to go

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Speaker 5: for a walk, You're gonna go grocery shop, but you

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Speaker 5: gotta be in public so that you can't have a meltdown.

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Speaker 5: You're to pull your shit together and you're just going

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Speaker 5: to walk around. We're not going to lay down on

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Speaker 5: a bed. And so I started feeling like I was

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Speaker 5: having contractions and we were supposed to go this game,

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Speaker 5: and I was like, you know what, I'm supposed to

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Speaker 5: go on with my life. Let's go to the game.

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Speaker 5: So we climbed and I folded myself into his. He

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Speaker 5: had that original tesla that looked like a little toy

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Speaker 5: car that was like six inches above the ground. I

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Speaker 5: folded my body into that and we went to the game,

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Speaker 5: and I think I made it seven inning something like

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Speaker 5: I don't even remember. But at a certain point I

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Speaker 5: was like throwing up and having diary in the bathroom,

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Speaker 5: and I was like, probably time to.

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Speaker 3: Go, and then what did you have the home birth?

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Speaker 3: I did?

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Speaker 5: Eventually, Yeah, at some point the next morning.

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Speaker 3: Did you have two? Do both of your kids are

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Speaker 3: home births?

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Speaker 5: So I got pregnant the second time, and I was like, oh, no,

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Speaker 5: I should I probably have to do that again so

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Speaker 5: that they don't like find out and that turns into

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Speaker 5: a therapy thing, like well why do you have me

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Speaker 5: at home and then go straight to So I decided

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Speaker 5: to do it again, not because I wanted to. And

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Speaker 5: three days into that when I was like, I fucking

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Speaker 5: hate myself, I hate midwives, I hate babies, I hate everyone.

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Speaker 5: And I did. I had him at home.

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Speaker 1: But three days into what what do you mean? Three

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Speaker 1: days into it.

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Speaker 5: I was like, two and a half days of labor.

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Speaker 5: It was a lot. It was a long time. My

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Speaker 5: second one I thought was gonna slide right out.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. But what a nightmare two and a

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Speaker 1: half days of labor. You were laboring at home for

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Speaker 1: two and a half days before you had the baby.

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Speaker 5: Yeah. At one point we drove over the canyon behind

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Speaker 5: garbage trucks because it was garbage day in the backseat

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Speaker 5: of my midwife's prius to go to the gynecologist to

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Speaker 5: check something out, just to make sure, and everything was fine.

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Speaker 5: So then we drove back over the camp. It was

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Speaker 5: a lot happened in those two and a half days.

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Speaker 5: Not a baby coming out.

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Speaker 3: Wow wow Wow.

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Speaker 1: Tell me what playing the character you play on Hacks

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Speaker 1: has taught you about being a parent or or what

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Speaker 1: has it taught you not to do about being a parent?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 5: I don't, I don't. I don't know that i'd take

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Speaker 5: any advice from from DJ. I love her, but listen, DJ,

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Speaker 5: I think is going to end up being a real

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Speaker 5: good mom because she's just gonna look at whatever Debrah

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Speaker 5: did and do the opposite.

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Speaker 3: Which is always a good pointer.

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Speaker 1: When you have great parents, it's impossible to replicate that exactly,

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Speaker 1: but when you have bad parents, it's almost a natural

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Speaker 1: instinct to do the opposite of what they've done.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: What a blessing to have a horrific childhood, you know,

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Speaker 5: because then you know exactly what not to do.

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Speaker 3: That's a great that's a great way to look at it.

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Speaker 1: I want to know how you managed to be on

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Speaker 1: starring in two shows also on Hacks.

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Speaker 3: How do you what? Who's your agent?

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Speaker 1: How did you how are you able to negotiate these

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Speaker 1: kinds of deals.

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Speaker 5: The good thing about Sunny is that we don't have

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Speaker 5: a set time of year that we shoot it. We

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Speaker 5: kind of shoot it whenever everyone's available, so I can

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Speaker 5: we can move that around and sort of make it work.

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Speaker 5: It's only been this is my second year of kind

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Speaker 5: of working literally every day NonStop. It's starting to get

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Speaker 5: to me. I'll be honest, it's a lot of what

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Speaker 5: it is is it's a lot of work, and it's

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Speaker 5: working through now a second spring break and a second

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Speaker 5: summer break for my kids. So I kind of feel

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Speaker 5: like I should probably be going on vacation with you

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Speaker 5: guys at some point in the next couple of years.

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Speaker 1: Right, Absolutely, absolutely, especially because high Potential is essentially a procedural.

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Speaker 3: So that's a lot of hours.

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Speaker 5: It's a lot of hours.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to know about, like the most fun

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Speaker 1: memory or the most fun day of shooting that you

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Speaker 1: ever had on It's always Sunny.

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Speaker 5: People ask this, and first of all, I can't even

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Speaker 5: remember all the episodes. But anytime I'm like lit on fire,

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Speaker 5: or I'm addicted to drugs, or I've been thrown off

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Speaker 5: a building, those are always the really fun ones you

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Speaker 5: read it. I love when people are like do you

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Speaker 5: ever read anything and be like absolutely not, I'll never

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Speaker 5: do this. I was like, No, who's that asshole? If

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Speaker 5: they write me like big funny stuff, I'm so excited.

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Speaker 5: There's a lot of fun like stunt stuff that i'd

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Speaker 5: get to do on Sunny that. Oh you know there

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Speaker 5: was the one where we did drowns in a bog

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Speaker 5: that was horrible. That was at like two o'clock in

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Speaker 5: the morning. Yeah, anything like that, that's insane.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, I think that's what comes true and your when

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about your abulience, I'll use that word, my

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Speaker 1: favorite word.

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Speaker 6: Ooh.

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Speaker 5: I don't know what it means, but I just inferred

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Speaker 5: and I think.

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Speaker 1: I get Yes, that comes through and your willingness to

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Speaker 1: just kind of be silly and outrageous, you know, like

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Speaker 1: it's when people take themselves too seriously. You don't see

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Speaker 1: that kind of kind of shine, yes and effervescence.

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Speaker 3: Thank you, who You're so welcome. Who's more vain? You

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Speaker 3: or Rob me?

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Speaker 5: He's not that vain? No, there are other men on

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Speaker 5: my television show that are a little bit more vain.

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Speaker 3: Do you want to name names? Glenn what about your kids?

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Speaker 1: Do you let your kids watch any of your shows?

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Speaker 1: Are they too little?

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Speaker 7: No?

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Speaker 6: No, they're not.

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Speaker 5: They're thirty. My older one just turned fifteen, and he

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Speaker 5: has been sneaking sunny scripts since he was about seven

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Speaker 5: or eight. We'd find him in bed reading sunny scripts

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Speaker 5: and we were like, well, this is bad. And then

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Speaker 5: a few years ago he started like we would start,

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Speaker 5: we would show them different chunks of episodes and he's

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Speaker 5: just obsessed with it. And now it's off the rails.

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Speaker 5: He's like, he's seen every episode. He thinks it's amazing.

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Speaker 5: And I love that because it is a really funny show.

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Speaker 5: But when you're fifteen, you got to kind of fine

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Speaker 5: tune that. I mean, I'll pause things all the time.

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Speaker 5: He'll say stuff all the time where I'm like, whoa,

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Speaker 5: that's not funny, and then we have to have those

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Speaker 5: conversations in time. He's going to be a very very

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Speaker 5: funny young man.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, who's funnier? You were Rob in the family dynamic.

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Speaker 5: I'm funnier, you're fun And he'll tell you that. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: he's smarter. He identifies himself as more of a writer producer.

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Speaker 5: He loves acting, but he would say that I'm fune.

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Speaker 1: Okay, well that's good, that's smart. And which one of

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Speaker 1: your children is more like you? Is there one that's

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Speaker 1: more like you and one that's more like him?

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Speaker 5: Yes, the older one who's sneaking sunny episodes is more

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Speaker 5: like him, and the younger one is more like me,

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Speaker 5: and he legitimately cracks me up.

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Speaker 1: I think Rob talked about being finding out he was

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Speaker 1: neuro divergent, Like when you found that out? I always

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Speaker 1: find this to be fascinating. Did any of the aspects

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Speaker 1: of his relationship or or I mean aspects of his

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Speaker 1: personality within your relationship?

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Speaker 3: Click? Yes, like what kind of stuff?

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Speaker 5: I remember going, Oh, that's why. We would be in

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Speaker 5: the car, just the two of us, like talking about something,

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Speaker 5: and then he would just go silent, like even while

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Speaker 5: we were dating, And I was like, does he no,

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Speaker 5: I'm still in the car with him, Like he could

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Speaker 5: just be completely in his own world. And I'm like,

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Speaker 5: I'm not good with silence. I'm a person who has

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Speaker 5: to like fill it or let's have a car or

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Speaker 5: turn the music on or something. But what are we

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Speaker 5: doing sitting here, like not talking? And I was like, Oh,

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Speaker 5: there's so much going on in his brain at all

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Speaker 5: at all times. Like he can easily be in a

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Speaker 5: conversation with me and then just absolutely shut me out.

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Speaker 5: And I'm like trying to pick up the pieces of

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Speaker 5: what just happened. That was one thing, but there's a

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Speaker 5: million of them though. But he's also like very prolific.

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Speaker 5: He's super super smart, and he's constantly coming up with

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Speaker 5: ideas or business ideas or show ideas or doing things

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Speaker 5: a way they've never been done before. It's pretty fascinating.

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Speaker 5: It's very impressive.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he probably misses you, doesn't he want more time

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Speaker 1: with you with all of your responsibilities.

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Speaker 3: He does.

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Speaker 5: They all miss me. It's very sweet. But it's one

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Speaker 5: of those things too where it's like he loves me

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Speaker 5: a lot these days because I'm not around. I'm like,

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Speaker 5: this totally works. I'm off doing my thing. A relationship

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Speaker 5: is great. You're missing me, yeah, but yeah, it's exciting

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Speaker 5: when we get to see each other. But I'm home

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Speaker 5: to be fair, like I only work. They have me

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Speaker 5: for eleven hours here, so plus drive time, Like I'm

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Speaker 5: home for evenings, so we spend time together at night.

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Speaker 3: Well then maybe it is the perfect schedule.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, Yeah, it's great. I just need a

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Speaker 5: vacation every once in a while and we're fine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you get to get all you your

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Speaker 1: kings out on set, like get all of your energy out,

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Speaker 1: and that way you can be like, you know, a

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Speaker 1: full complete mother. When you get home, you're not there

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Speaker 1: all day dealing with them.

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Speaker 3: I like that schedule.

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Speaker 5: I love it. Yeah, anybody can be a really excellent

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Speaker 5: parent for three hours at a time. Rob's really doing

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Speaker 5: the heavy lifting right now. I come home and I'm

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Speaker 5: just a dream. I'm like the best mom ever.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the spirit.

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Speaker 1: I always think about, like mothers and how people handle stuff,

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Speaker 1: especially in this business, because there's so much to deal with,

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Speaker 1: you know, and I could barely take care of my dog.

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Speaker 1: I don't even really take care of my dog, to

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Speaker 1: be honest. Today he had a limp and I just

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Speaker 1: was like, who do I text about this?

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Speaker 7: You know?

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Speaker 1: I'm like and then they're like, did he did anything

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Speaker 1: happen yesterday? I was like, well, I was wrestling with him,

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Speaker 1: so I'm probably the culprit. But I'm always just I

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Speaker 1: love your dog, by the way, Oh thank you, Doug.

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Speaker 1: He's so beautiful. He's so beautiful, and he's got these big,

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Speaker 1: beautiful brown eyes. It really makes me appreciate brown eyes

381
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Speaker 1: because as a blue eyed person, everyone in my family

382
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Speaker 1: has blue eyes, so I always think of it's this

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Speaker 1: weird child thing where I always look at blue My

384
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Speaker 1: parents both had blue eyes, and all my siblings have

385
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Speaker 1: blue eyes, and so I always looked at everyone with

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Speaker 1: blue eyes like that's home. And now that I have

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Speaker 1: a dog that has these beautiful brown eyes, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: that's home.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: You're like, there's some soul there, what's that?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he's definitely soulful. I feel like his voice, if

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Speaker 3: he could talk, would be like Luther.

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Speaker 5: Vandros absolutely absolutely. And that big thick tongue.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah. Then they have purple tongues. Chow chow's

395
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Speaker 1: Yeah that they have those purple tongues. So everyone always

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Speaker 1: wants to see that. And you know what's so sweet

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Speaker 1: about dog? Actually, he's so sweet with children, which is

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Speaker 1: something that like, you know, it's such a nice.

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Speaker 3: Feature for a dog.

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Speaker 1: He knows when to be gentle with small children, not

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Speaker 1: with small animals.

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Speaker 3: Unfortunately.

403
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Speaker 5: That's okay.

404
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Speaker 3: Do you guys have pets.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, we have two dogs and a cat and they're

406
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Speaker 5: all really good friends. Obsessed with animals.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I always wonder how cats get along with dogs, But

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Speaker 1: I guess it's happened. I guess I grew up and

410
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Speaker 1: they we always had our cats and dogs completely separate.

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Speaker 3: Other people seem to be able to integrate.

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Speaker 5: But well, I think it depends on the cat. Rob

413
00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:01,600
Speaker 5: didn't think he was a cat person for this reason.

414
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Speaker 5: He's like cats are all like finicky. This cat. I

415
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:07,040
Speaker 5: rescued him and brought him home, got him neutered and

416
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Speaker 5: deflet and all that, and he we had like him

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Speaker 5: in a room and he came out of the room

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Speaker 5: and saw the dogs came running towards him, and he

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Speaker 5: was like hey and flopped on his back. It was like,

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Speaker 5: smell me. So I don't know. He just decided he

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Speaker 5: was fine with it. And now they all play together.

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Speaker 5: It's the best.

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Speaker 3: And is it a fluffy cat or is it a

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Speaker 3: skinny cat?

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Speaker 5: He's a white fluffy cat with a big, fat fluffy tail.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, the hole on it? Does he likes it?

427
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Speaker 3: A fat face, a fat fluffy face.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, he's like he's all fluffed. He's like a big

429
00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:35,199
Speaker 5: giant and if you hold him like this, he just

430
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Speaker 5: like flops on either side. He's fine with whatever, which

431
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Speaker 5: I like. I need that. I need you to be

432
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Speaker 5: fine with me.

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Speaker 3: Nay, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: I like to put animals on their back and then

435
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Speaker 1: just kind of molest them, you know. Yeah, want their bodies.

436
00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:48,679
Speaker 1: I like the fur, and I like the meat. The bigger,

437
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:50,320
Speaker 1: the better, the puffier.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, all of it.

439
00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:53,320
Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, don't give me a skinny. I don't want

440
00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:55,040
Speaker 5: to have to be fragile. I got to throw you

441
00:17:55,080 --> 00:17:56,520
Speaker 5: over my shoulder and you're coming with me.

442
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,120
Speaker 3: That's how I feel about babies too.

443
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,320
Speaker 1: I prefer them to be oversized, you know, like I

444
00:18:01,359 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 1: want a big nugget if you want if you have

445
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:05,760
Speaker 1: a baby on a plane or like, you know, then

446
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:07,400
Speaker 1: like the chunkier the better.

447
00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:09,359
Speaker 3: If you see a skinny baby, it's like, I'm not

448
00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:10,119
Speaker 3: drawn to that.

449
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:12,880
Speaker 1: And I mean we already know how I feel about children,

450
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:16,119
Speaker 1: but babies obviously get a pass because they can be

451
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:20,720
Speaker 1: so luscious and just scrumptious, you know. But when they're thin,

452
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:21,640
Speaker 1: I don't like that.

453
00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 5: It's like a twig, like it's it's too fragile. I

454
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:25,760
Speaker 5: don't want to be responsible for it.

455
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:26,880
Speaker 3: Did you have big babies?

456
00:18:27,560 --> 00:18:28,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, big fat babies.

457
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:30,560
Speaker 1: I feel like thin people. I know you're very thin,

458
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:32,720
Speaker 1: because even on camera you look thin. I feel like

459
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:35,399
Speaker 1: thin people have the fattest babies. It doesn't make any sense.

460
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:37,920
Speaker 5: I don't know how it happened, but yeah, they were

461
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,399
Speaker 5: both almost nine pounds.

462
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:40,919
Speaker 3: Oh wow, a big baby.

463
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:43,359
Speaker 1: Yeah that is a big baby with your homebirth and

464
00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:46,400
Speaker 1: you're two and a half day home delivery system. Yeah.

465
00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:46,640
Speaker 6: Yeah.

466
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:49,480
Speaker 5: Let me be very clear, it was terrible, bad idea.

467
00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:50,720
Speaker 1: We're going to take a break and we're going to

468
00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:53,600
Speaker 1: be right back with Caitlyn Olsin to get some take

469
00:18:53,640 --> 00:19:00,760
Speaker 1: some callers, and we're back with Caitlyn all sid who

470
00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:03,800
Speaker 1: is She's on hacks, She's the star of High Potential

471
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,000
Speaker 1: and she's on It's Always Study in Philadelphia, so you

472
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,800
Speaker 1: really can't miss her. Caitlin, what was the best before

473
00:19:09,840 --> 00:19:12,280
Speaker 1: we take a caller, can you think of the best

474
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:14,280
Speaker 1: career advice that you've ever been given?

475
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 5: You know what, the best audition advice, which is basically

476
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,440
Speaker 5: career advice for me, was to make it your own

477
00:19:21,480 --> 00:19:24,680
Speaker 5: and stop reading all of the character descriptions so perfectly

478
00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:26,880
Speaker 5: and trying to be exactly what you think they want,

479
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:29,360
Speaker 5: because they don't even know what they want. Just read

480
00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:33,040
Speaker 5: the material. Make the material as good as you can

481
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:36,320
Speaker 5: in your own voice and switch it up. Just make

482
00:19:36,359 --> 00:19:37,720
Speaker 5: it your own and then go in and have fun.

483
00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:40,679
Speaker 5: And that was, honestly, that was very freeing once you

484
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:42,840
Speaker 5: stop caring about like, oh, I wonder if they're gonna

485
00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:45,040
Speaker 5: want this. They don't know what they want. They just

486
00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:46,600
Speaker 5: want you to come in and be good. That was

487
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,719
Speaker 5: the best audition advice I got, and I still do it.

488
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:50,320
Speaker 3: Yeah.

489
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:52,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to own what you're doing, right, You

490
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:53,840
Speaker 1: have to make it your own and you have to

491
00:19:53,840 --> 00:19:56,240
Speaker 1: make it personal to you. And that's kind of the

492
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:58,600
Speaker 1: only way to set yourself apart in any sort of

493
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,760
Speaker 1: creative I feel like any sort of creative medium.

494
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,439
Speaker 5: I think it absolutely it. You can use that across

495
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:08,119
Speaker 5: the board. Just just do what you want to do,

496
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:11,080
Speaker 5: be the best version. If people like it, great, If

497
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:13,080
Speaker 5: they don't, great, it wasn't for you anyway. You can't

498
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:14,359
Speaker 5: cram yourself into a box.

499
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:16,400
Speaker 3: Okay, great, all.

500
00:20:16,359 --> 00:20:18,560
Speaker 2: Right, Well are you ready to give some advice?

501
00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:19,399
Speaker 4: Yes?

502
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:24,639
Speaker 1: Excellent, excellent, always always me too, Me too, sister.

503
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,159
Speaker 2: So our first question, this one's just an email, but

504
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:31,600
Speaker 2: this comes from Nicole. She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm writing

505
00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:33,720
Speaker 2: in with a bit of a unique circumstance and would

506
00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,800
Speaker 2: love some guidance on this. I'm recently divorced and it's

507
00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:39,520
Speaker 2: as amicable as it could have been. We share tween

508
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:42,760
Speaker 2: twins and co parent great I kept my married last

509
00:20:42,840 --> 00:20:46,080
Speaker 2: name because I hated my maiden name. I'm a veterinarian

510
00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:48,679
Speaker 2: and everyone in town knows me as doctor X husband's

511
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:51,400
Speaker 2: last name. That name is my kid's last name too.

512
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,560
Speaker 2: My ex was totally fine with me keeping the name

513
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,320
Speaker 2: and using it how I wanted, even in our separation agreement.

514
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:59,840
Speaker 2: Now comes the tricky part. My ex never wanted more kids,

515
00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:02,600
Speaker 2: but I do. I'm in the process of freezing eggs

516
00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:04,320
Speaker 2: and hope to use a sperm donor before I'm all

517
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:04,840
Speaker 2: dried up.

518
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:07,000
Speaker 3: And my clock is ticking. I just turned forty one.

519
00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:10,040
Speaker 2: My ex is supportive of this, but do I give

520
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:12,760
Speaker 2: the potential new baby from donor sperm the last name

521
00:21:12,760 --> 00:21:15,240
Speaker 2: of me and my kids? I feel weird, not that

522
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:17,359
Speaker 2: my ex will mind too much, but I'm also thinking

523
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,240
Speaker 2: of his very traditional family, who may find it offensive

524
00:21:20,240 --> 00:21:22,119
Speaker 2: that I'm giving their name to a child that's not

525
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:25,200
Speaker 2: biologically theirs. That said, I want this child to share

526
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,280
Speaker 2: my current last name and the name my kids all

527
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,360
Speaker 2: have any advice, Nicole.

528
00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:32,600
Speaker 1: I mean, that is your last name. When people divorce,

529
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:35,239
Speaker 1: does the husband have to give it back? Permission to

530
00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:36,960
Speaker 1: give your name, to keep your name?

531
00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:40,280
Speaker 5: That's not an engagement ring. Ye, that's your last name.

532
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:42,480
Speaker 5: And also who cares about the ex in laws?

533
00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:43,560
Speaker 3: Keep the name exactly?

534
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:45,199
Speaker 1: Who cares about the ex in laws? I was going

535
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,080
Speaker 1: to say you could ask them, but then I thought, no, wait,

536
00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:48,399
Speaker 1: why do you even bother asking them?

537
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 5: Who can We're never talking to them again.

538
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you also want your kids to all have

539
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:53,880
Speaker 3: the same last name.

540
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,399
Speaker 5: Yeah, yes, they're siblings.

541
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:58,440
Speaker 1: That's your argument for that. If anyone comes to you

542
00:21:58,880 --> 00:21:59,640
Speaker 1: or comes for.

543
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:04,080
Speaker 3: You, say about passing that name along.

544
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,920
Speaker 5: Yeah, especially if the ex husband is okay with it.

545
00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:07,560
Speaker 6: Yeah.

546
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:08,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, that's easy.

547
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:09,480
Speaker 5: All good problem.

548
00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:11,040
Speaker 3: It's an easy one problem solve.

549
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:11,359
Speaker 6: Guys.

550
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:12,680
Speaker 5: That was You're welcome, all.

551
00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:16,399
Speaker 2: Right, Nicole, Good luck, baby Dust. Our next question comes

552
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:20,679
Speaker 2: from Redneck Kitty. She says, Dear Chelsea, my name is Rachel,

553
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:24,320
Speaker 2: but my DJ producer entertainer name is Redneck Kitty. I'm

554
00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:26,760
Speaker 2: thirty one and I started DJing when I was living

555
00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:28,399
Speaker 2: in Australia at the start of COVID.

556
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:30,760
Speaker 3: I was a COVID DJ. It's a thing.

557
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,920
Speaker 2: I'm single with no kids. Nine years ago I lost

558
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:36,399
Speaker 2: my brother and partner and that cracked me open in

559
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:39,439
Speaker 2: a very yolow way of living. I traveled the world

560
00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:42,359
Speaker 2: stripped to fund my dive trips and went on skiing

561
00:22:42,359 --> 00:22:45,359
Speaker 2: and climbing adventures, went from mansions to dumpster diving, and

562
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 2: had all sorts of wild adventures in between. Wow therapy

563
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 2: eventually reminded me that I might live longer than tomorrow,

564
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:54,119
Speaker 2: so maybe I should plan a future. After being at

565
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 2: my soul's end with stripping last year, I was messaging

566
00:22:56,840 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 2: chat GPT about switching careers, but decided first to consul

567
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:03,800
Speaker 2: mother Aya, and she was very clear music is my path.

568
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:06,960
Speaker 2: So I gave up stripping after nine years to pursue music.

569
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:08,760
Speaker 3: Luckily, I've saved.

570
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,600
Speaker 2: Smartly, and along the way, I met a couple sugar

571
00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:12,600
Speaker 2: daddies who believed in me enough to give me some

572
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 2: cushion to focus on my art. Now I've moved across

573
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:17,840
Speaker 2: the country to study under a legend in the electronic

574
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:20,639
Speaker 2: music industry. I'm in school and I love what I'm learning.

575
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,480
Speaker 2: But here's the problem. There's still this gremlin in my

576
00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 2: head screaming, Who are you at thirty one to suddenly

577
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:28,639
Speaker 2: decide you want to be a DJ? You're too old.

578
00:23:28,680 --> 00:23:30,800
Speaker 2: It's a stupid choice. You'll never make it. You'll be

579
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:33,639
Speaker 2: a broke, struggling artist forever. I should have started ten

580
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,919
Speaker 2: years ago. Pursuing art feels scarier than free climbing a

581
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:40,199
Speaker 2: cliff without ropes, and I'm terrified. So here's my question.

582
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,639
Speaker 2: How do you draw from that deep well of self

583
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:45,440
Speaker 2: belief and confidence? How do you drown out the gremlins

584
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 2: when your heart knows what it wants but your head

585
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 2: just wants certainty? Is this a stupid idea? How do

586
00:23:50,119 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 2: you trust yourself when your path isn't normal? Any advice

587
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,480
Speaker 2: on pushing past the fear and owning my space would

588
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 2: mean the world.

589
00:23:56,080 --> 00:24:00,560
Speaker 1: Redneck Kitty, Hi, red Neck Kitty, how are you Hi?

590
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:04,440
Speaker 4: I'm good. I'm actually just like so excited right now.

591
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:07,640
Speaker 3: This is our special guest today, Kate lin Olsen is here.

592
00:24:08,119 --> 00:24:09,280
Speaker 6: Hi, hiking Lyn.

593
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:11,400
Speaker 5: Nice to you.

594
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:13,640
Speaker 3: You too, Oh. I love your story.

595
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:16,840
Speaker 1: What a nice, adventurous life you've lived and you're only thirty.

596
00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:19,280
Speaker 1: You have a whole You have two thirds of your

597
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 1: life left to go, and by the way, maybe more

598
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,239
Speaker 1: than that, because they say, if we make it through

599
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,359
Speaker 1: the next ten to fifteen years, you can extend your

600
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 1: life until you're one hundred and fifty.

601
00:24:28,119 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 3: I don't know who the fuck wants to do that.

602
00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 5: But you don't hop out before then?

603
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:33,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, I mean, who could afford to do that?

604
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:37,840
Speaker 1: I think listen, we all have those voices in our head, right, Caitlyn.

605
00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:40,640
Speaker 1: I mean we all kind of yes, don't know what

606
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:43,080
Speaker 1: we're doing or not certain of what we're doing. The

607
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 1: proof that you have is that you're here, and you've

608
00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:47,639
Speaker 1: got the choice to do what you wanted to do,

609
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:50,720
Speaker 1: and you got yourself all this way so far. You're

610
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:53,520
Speaker 1: thirty one years old. You're not too old for anything.

611
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:56,240
Speaker 1: This is the beginning of a new adventure. You've got

612
00:24:56,280 --> 00:24:59,120
Speaker 1: yourself in a situation where you can actually choose what

613
00:24:59,160 --> 00:24:59,880
Speaker 1: you want to do.

614
00:25:00,320 --> 00:25:01,560
Speaker 3: That is so powerful.

615
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:04,360
Speaker 4: I think it's just like I don't know, I kind

616
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:07,760
Speaker 4: of get in like the comparison space, which I know

617
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,040
Speaker 4: is like comparison is a thief of joy, But like

618
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:13,160
Speaker 4: I compare myself to all these like musical prodigies who

619
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:15,600
Speaker 4: like started when they're eighteen, and I'm or even you,

620
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 4: like you know, you kind of like knew since you

621
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,360
Speaker 4: came out of the womb that you were like destined

622
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:21,439
Speaker 4: for greatness. Like you were like, I'm above all of

623
00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:23,240
Speaker 4: you guys, you know, and I was like I kind

624
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:25,879
Speaker 4: of like a late Blumer in this of like I

625
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:29,040
Speaker 4: don't know, realizing my path, and so I kind of

626
00:25:29,040 --> 00:25:31,600
Speaker 4: like get in my head about it because I didn't

627
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:34,600
Speaker 4: know sooner that it's not right, and I I don't know,

628
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:36,159
Speaker 4: that's just kind of like what I get in my

629
00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:39,160
Speaker 4: head about. And like you talk a lot about wanting

630
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:41,520
Speaker 4: women to know they have like this deep well of

631
00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:44,959
Speaker 4: resilience and strength and confidence that they can call on,

632
00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 4: and I'm just like curious maybe like more practical tips

633
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:49,959
Speaker 4: on how you actually do that.

634
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 5: But don't you when you look back on your life, go,

635
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:56,080
Speaker 5: oh my god, look at everything that I have accomplished

636
00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:59,320
Speaker 5: and lived through and here I am, And everything took

637
00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:01,560
Speaker 5: you one step closer to where you are right now.

638
00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:04,800
Speaker 5: And I think that I get that feeling. Thirty one

639
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,679
Speaker 5: felt really old to me too. I started doing Sonny

640
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,800
Speaker 5: when I was twenty nine, and then I always say

641
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:13,480
Speaker 5: my thirties were way better than my twenties, which I

642
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,679
Speaker 5: thought was going to be impossible, and then my forties

643
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:18,600
Speaker 5: were way better than my thirties. You're just getting started.

644
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:20,960
Speaker 5: And I think practically, when you look back and you

645
00:26:21,000 --> 00:26:22,959
Speaker 5: go look at everything I've survived, I'm sure you've been

646
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:26,160
Speaker 5: through a lot more than what you have written out

647
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:28,600
Speaker 5: in your email. So you rely on that stuff and

648
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:30,440
Speaker 5: you go look at me now, and you also, you're

649
00:26:30,480 --> 00:26:34,320
Speaker 5: so charismatic and beautiful, and what do you have to lose?

650
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:38,000
Speaker 4: You know? Yeah, thank you, that's really nice.

651
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:38,560
Speaker 3: Yeah.

652
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 1: And also, you know, off of what Caitlyn just said,

653
00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:44,399
Speaker 1: a great exercise, and this is in that book, David

654
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:47,119
Speaker 1: Hawkins wrote that I always talk about letting go is

655
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:50,120
Speaker 1: writing down all of the things that you have accomplished,

656
00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:52,560
Speaker 1: writing down where you came from.

657
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:53,600
Speaker 3: What you went through.

658
00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 1: How you know all of the things you listed in

659
00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:59,399
Speaker 1: that letter alone, I'm sure there's a zillion other things,

660
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,679
Speaker 1: but down as a reminder, and every once in a while,

661
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 1: like when I read that book, I'm reminded to do that,

662
00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:10,359
Speaker 1: like all of the milestones I've reached, all of the accomplishments.

663
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:09,840
Speaker 3: That I've had.

664
00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:12,600
Speaker 1: Even if you just go back a year and think

665
00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:14,840
Speaker 1: about the biggest moments that you've had in the last

666
00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:19,119
Speaker 1: year as a reminder of your tenacity and as a

667
00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:22,120
Speaker 1: reminder to yourself of how powerful you are. You're choosing

668
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:24,879
Speaker 1: to make a decision. You're not letting life happen to you.

669
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:27,600
Speaker 1: You're happening you know what I mean. You're making your

670
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 1: life happen for you. And there's a lot of power

671
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,200
Speaker 1: in that. And there's so many people who call into

672
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:35,040
Speaker 1: this podcast who don't have half of the confidence that

673
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:38,120
Speaker 1: you have and who haven't made those choices or haven't

674
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:40,640
Speaker 1: had the strength of mind to make determinations about where

675
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:41,959
Speaker 1: they want to do in their future.

676
00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:43,640
Speaker 3: And you're already doing that.

677
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 1: So, like I would say, when you get off of

678
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:49,600
Speaker 1: this call to literally just write down everything you've accomplished

679
00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:51,960
Speaker 1: in the past year, and then you're going to see

680
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 1: it in writing and you're going to understand how far

681
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:58,920
Speaker 1: you've come. And if you do that every few months

682
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,120
Speaker 1: and as a reminder and like set it in your

683
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:04,080
Speaker 1: calendar and your phone as a reminder to really reflect,

684
00:28:04,320 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: because this is the problem that I find is that

685
00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:10,800
Speaker 1: we go so fast sometimes and Caitlin's life is just

686
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:14,919
Speaker 1: as busy as anybody's. Like you forget, you know, you

687
00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,520
Speaker 1: forget to sit there and actually take a moment and

688
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,639
Speaker 1: be like, Wow, you just got through all of this

689
00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:21,960
Speaker 1: stuff and you just did this, and you did this,

690
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,159
Speaker 1: and you did you know, I made this decision, and

691
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:25,000
Speaker 1: I made this decision.

692
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,159
Speaker 3: I got out of that relationship.

693
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:28,640
Speaker 1: I'm into this, Like all of the things that make

694
00:28:28,720 --> 00:28:32,240
Speaker 1: you a person are really important to constantly think about

695
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:35,879
Speaker 1: instead of just zipping through life with no time to

696
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,040
Speaker 1: enjoy the what you've done.

697
00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 4: No, you're so right, Like even just hearing you talk

698
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,920
Speaker 4: about it, Like when I moved to Australia, I had

699
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:46,280
Speaker 4: like five hundred dollars in my pocket and now here

700
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:49,600
Speaker 4: I am even just saying that, I'm like, yeah, damn, yeah,

701
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:50,840
Speaker 4: I have done it.

702
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 5: Yeah that's cool.

703
00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:54,160
Speaker 3: So hang up from here and do that, will you?

704
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:54,760
Speaker 4: I will.

705
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:56,160
Speaker 5: I'm gonna make my lists.

706
00:28:56,040 --> 00:28:59,040
Speaker 1: Okay, great, great, and then put it on your refrigerator

707
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:00,160
Speaker 1: and kiss it every morning.

708
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:04,120
Speaker 5: Yes and color lipsicks, Yeah.

709
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:07,160
Speaker 3: Exactly, that's that's the morning. That's the spirit.

710
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:10,400
Speaker 2: And then also, if you have like a SoundCloud or something,

711
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:11,959
Speaker 2: send me the link and we'll put it in the

712
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:13,400
Speaker 2: description so people can check you out.

713
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:15,920
Speaker 4: Oh nice, Yes, I have a new EP coming out,

714
00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:19,640
Speaker 4: Booty delicious bootlegs. It's basically a bunch of remixes to

715
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,680
Speaker 4: like the crunk, dirty South hip hop. I was raised

716
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:24,960
Speaker 4: on made into like tech house, so if you're into that.

717
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:25,520
Speaker 3: Kind of stuff.

718
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm excited.

719
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,240
Speaker 4: It's my first songs I've made.

720
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 5: I've made a song. I'm so excited.

721
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:34,200
Speaker 3: There you go, you made a song. That's number song.

722
00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:35,120
Speaker 3: I can't believe it.

723
00:29:36,840 --> 00:29:39,360
Speaker 4: This podcast is amazing. I feel like I'm having a moment.

724
00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 4: Like my best friend she saw you in Vegas and

725
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,880
Speaker 4: she had like a moment where she like touched her

726
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:47,800
Speaker 4: hand and had a full anxiety spiral for three days

727
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:49,240
Speaker 4: that I had to talk her out of because she

728
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:49,600
Speaker 4: was like.

729
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:50,920
Speaker 5: I felt like I met God.

730
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 3: Oh my god, poor thing.

731
00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:56,800
Speaker 1: Let's tell her I said hello, and she has not

732
00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: met God, and none of us ever will, as far

733
00:29:58,840 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 1: as I serve.

734
00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:02,560
Speaker 4: She's the one who put me on this podcast, and

735
00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,240
Speaker 4: I haven't even told her that I was going on,

736
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:08,440
Speaker 4: Oh my God, and hear it and so shout out.

737
00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:08,920
Speaker 3: You know who you are.

738
00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:09,719
Speaker 5: I'm not gonna say your name.

739
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 3: She'll get pissed, but yeah, she loves.

740
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 6: You so much.

741
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 2: All right, thanks so much.

742
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:16,720
Speaker 3: We'll talk to you soon. Okay, you guys have a

743
00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:18,600
Speaker 3: great day. Bye bye.

744
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:22,720
Speaker 1: Look at how healing you are, Caitlin with this is two.

745
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:24,520
Speaker 3: Home runs back to bad. I mean that's that good

746
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:28,120
Speaker 3: light energy. That's right, Aulus, we're really doing it.

747
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:31,400
Speaker 1: I love this way to hop on the train and

748
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:32,480
Speaker 1: get the party started.

749
00:30:33,320 --> 00:30:37,760
Speaker 2: So our next question comes from Jen. She says, Dear Chelsea,

750
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 2: I have a seven year old daughter who's a spitfire.

751
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:43,960
Speaker 2: She's wonderful and loving and kind, but also she's exhausting.

752
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 2: She challenges every single thing. When she doesn't get her

753
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 2: way with her negotiation skills, she'll be an amazing lawyer

754
00:30:50,040 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 2: or hostage negotiator someday. I don't spoil her, and she's

755
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:57,040
Speaker 2: very upset about that. She feels that each day after school,

756
00:30:57,160 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 2: if it was a good day, we should go to

757
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 2: Starbucks or Target or somewhere and get a treat. I

758
00:31:02,080 --> 00:31:04,560
Speaker 2: tell her no, and that we're going home. She throws

759
00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:06,440
Speaker 2: a fit and wines and cries that she had a

760
00:31:06,440 --> 00:31:08,960
Speaker 2: good day and she just wants a treat. I get it, girl,

761
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:11,080
Speaker 2: but we can't support a Starbucks habit for the both

762
00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:13,560
Speaker 2: of us. How do I help guide her to be

763
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 2: a respectful person who listens to me and trusts me,

764
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 2: especially as she gets into her teenage years, yet not

765
00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:21,680
Speaker 2: extinguish her fire that I know will someday change the world.

766
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 3: Jen Well, I read somebody said to me the other day.

767
00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 1: I always love to ask people about their kids, like

768
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 1: if they have favorites. I love to ask this question

769
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 1: to men because men always have a favorite and it

770
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:36,080
Speaker 1: changes and it moves around. But somebody said, you know,

771
00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 1: the kid that gives you the most trouble is going

772
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 1: to be the most successful. So that's something to hang

773
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 1: on to. A way for your to teach your child

774
00:31:45,080 --> 00:31:49,600
Speaker 1: about responsibilities and money like is to actually break go

775
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:52,280
Speaker 1: to Starbucks one day, go get those treats and then

776
00:31:52,440 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 1: break down the receipt with her when you get home

777
00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:57,400
Speaker 1: and show her exactly how much everything costs. I mean,

778
00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 1: I got something at Starbucks the other day that was

779
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:02,440
Speaker 1: seventeen It was one thing. I don't remember what it was,

780
00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 1: but it's absolutely ridiculous. So I think just kind of

781
00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:08,600
Speaker 1: getting in there early and teaching them the value of money,

782
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:10,640
Speaker 1: and maybe she can do little things around the house.

783
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:13,480
Speaker 1: You have to kind of reprogram her. It sounds like

784
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,760
Speaker 1: just because she had a good day, that's a reward

785
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:16,880
Speaker 1: in it of itself.

786
00:32:17,320 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 3: You don't get a reward for a reward.

787
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 1: You know, her having a great day is great, but

788
00:32:22,680 --> 00:32:25,360
Speaker 1: that's not something to be But I also, I'm not

789
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:26,120
Speaker 1: a parent, Caitlyn.

790
00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:27,800
Speaker 3: Do you want to chime in here with any parential

791
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:28,680
Speaker 3: advice you might have?

792
00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 5: Well you should be because that was perfect. And this

793
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:35,040
Speaker 5: just happened the other day. Rob took one of our

794
00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 5: kids to adoptor appointment, and so he was like, if

795
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:40,120
Speaker 5: you get U early enough, we'll go to McDonald's. I'm like,

796
00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 5: why why it's a doctor appointment? You're you're a teenager.

797
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,520
Speaker 5: You go to a goddamn doctor and then you go

798
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 5: to the dentist sometimes and then you go to the

799
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 5: Like that's just that's part of life. You don't get

800
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,760
Speaker 5: McDonald's every time you have to do something out of

801
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:56,560
Speaker 5: the ordinary. But because I think it's like there's no

802
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 5: like reward for having to just deal with like life stuff.

803
00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:01,520
Speaker 5: But I love what you said about come up with

804
00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:04,520
Speaker 5: not basic cleanup after yourselves. I don't think you should

805
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:06,719
Speaker 5: pay children for cleaning up after themselves. We all live here,

806
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:08,640
Speaker 5: we're all cleaning up after ourselves. But come up with

807
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:10,640
Speaker 5: little jobs for her where she can save money, and

808
00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 5: then when she saves up enough money, she can go

809
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 5: to Starbucks and spend it on something. I think that's great.

810
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:18,600
Speaker 5: But I totally agree with like it was a good day,

811
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:23,160
Speaker 5: so everybody fun all over me for not your what

812
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 5: in second grade? Like it should be a good day.

813
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:29,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, And also there's other ways to reward that, you know, like, oh,

814
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 1: like non monetary ways to go home and play. Okay, well,

815
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 1: you know, on special days, on special occasions, we'll go

816
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:37,080
Speaker 1: home and we'll play a board game together for an hour.

817
00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:39,200
Speaker 1: I'm going to give you my sole attention and we'll

818
00:33:39,200 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 1: do something like that together. Or we'll plan something this

819
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 1: weekend just you and me and we'll do something like

820
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 1: there's other ways to make it special other than you know,

821
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:50,400
Speaker 1: going to Starbucks or go to any of those places

822
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 1: after school. And also I just think, like I remember

823
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 1: my parents financially struggling growing up, and I understood about

824
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:01,480
Speaker 1: money very early that if I wanted it, I was

825
00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 1: going to have to go get it like I you know,

826
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,120
Speaker 1: and I was resourceful enough. And this girl sounds like

827
00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:09,520
Speaker 1: she's going to get to that point. I know she's

828
00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 1: only seven, right, is that what she said, she's seven,

829
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:15,720
Speaker 1: but you really just want to impress upon her how

830
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:18,080
Speaker 1: how much things cost to the world we live in

831
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,920
Speaker 1: and the reality like that's something you do once a

832
00:34:20,960 --> 00:34:23,480
Speaker 1: week on a Friday, you know, to celebrate the weekend. Okay,

833
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 1: we'll go to Starbucks, you know, and there's no reason

834
00:34:26,000 --> 00:34:27,760
Speaker 1: to do that all the time. So that's my parenting

835
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,920
Speaker 1: advice for today's episode.

836
00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:33,279
Speaker 2: All right, Our next question comes from Kristin. She says,

837
00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:35,640
Speaker 2: Dear Chelsea, my name is Kristin and I'm twenty three

838
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:38,759
Speaker 2: years old. I'm currently a male carrier for USPS, and

839
00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 2: I'm fully independent. I live by myself and fully support

840
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 2: myself and my animals. I'm finding it hard to relate

841
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 2: to people my age and connect with them. I live

842
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:49,239
Speaker 2: in a college town at the moment, so most of

843
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:51,440
Speaker 2: my friends are in college or fresh out, and I'm

844
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 2: having a hard time keeping friends. I feel like I

845
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 2: don't really relate to people my age, and they're all immature,

846
00:34:56,640 --> 00:34:59,719
Speaker 2: and I quite frankly can't stand them. They're very self centered.

847
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:00,239
Speaker 6: And weirdly mean.

848
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:02,800
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if it's me or why am struggling

849
00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:06,400
Speaker 2: to keep female friendships. Please help Kristen and she'll be

850
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:08,799
Speaker 2: joining us here in a moment. How old is she

851
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:09,720
Speaker 2: twenty three?

852
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:13,440
Speaker 1: Twenty three hanging out with college kids that are what

853
00:35:13,520 --> 00:35:14,600
Speaker 1: eighteen to twenty one.

854
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 5: Or like, just out of college?

855
00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:19,400
Speaker 3: Did you go to college, Caitlin.

856
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:21,320
Speaker 5: I went to the University of Oregon.

857
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:24,600
Speaker 3: Oh, that's fun. I love Oregon so pretty.

858
00:35:24,480 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 5: D Yeah, I wanted to be I wanted to be

859
00:35:25,920 --> 00:35:28,560
Speaker 5: close to my parents. I really I didn't want to

860
00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:30,839
Speaker 5: leave them. I was a very late bloomer. I went

861
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 5: home on the weekends, Caitlyn.

862
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 3: Were you a late bloomer in other ways or in

863
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:35,200
Speaker 3: every way?

864
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:37,680
Speaker 5: In every I was a late bloomer in every way.

865
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 5: I never snuck out of my house. I was like,

866
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:41,240
Speaker 5: why would you do that? My mom would be upset

867
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:44,400
Speaker 5: if she, like if I was missing. All I wanted

868
00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:46,360
Speaker 5: was boobs. I still kind of do, but not as

869
00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 5: much as before. Didn't have a boyfriend all through high school.

870
00:35:50,040 --> 00:35:52,279
Speaker 5: Very very late bloomer. I was like a little kid

871
00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:53,279
Speaker 5: for a very long time.

872
00:35:53,560 --> 00:35:53,880
Speaker 3: Got it?

873
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 4: Hi?

874
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 3: How are you cutie pie?

875
00:35:56,840 --> 00:35:57,719
Speaker 6: How are you?

876
00:35:57,719 --> 00:35:59,799
Speaker 3: You're so cute? Look at you on your show?

877
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 1: Ye, I was sitting on Oh that's okay, honey, we're

878
00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:03,520
Speaker 1: all sweaty.

879
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:05,680
Speaker 3: I'm going through bene pause. So I'm sweating too.

880
00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:11,040
Speaker 1: So you're hanging out with younger people or people your age?

881
00:36:11,239 --> 00:36:13,080
Speaker 6: Yeah, I hang out with a lot of older people.

882
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:15,880
Speaker 7: I just turned twenty four, okay, and I can't seem

883
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:17,320
Speaker 7: to keep friends my age.

884
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:18,120
Speaker 3: What happens?

885
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:20,440
Speaker 6: I don't know? They ghost me.

886
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:23,080
Speaker 7: I just had a friend recently. She just unadded me

887
00:36:23,120 --> 00:36:26,040
Speaker 7: on everything, and I don't know why, and I don't

888
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:29,160
Speaker 7: want to reach out because she clearly doesn't want to

889
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 7: be talking to me.

890
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:31,800
Speaker 6: So I'm just not sure why.

891
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:35,280
Speaker 7: I connect with older women a lot better, like fifties sixties.

892
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:37,439
Speaker 7: I just get along with them better, and it's easy

893
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:40,920
Speaker 7: to maintain relationships. But I want friends my age to

894
00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:43,600
Speaker 7: like hang out because I'm the same age as their kids.

895
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:46,719
Speaker 6: And that's just who get what I'm looking for?

896
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 1: Well, okay, it's not what you're looking for, but go

897
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:52,440
Speaker 1: where the light is. Like, if you're having relationships that

898
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:55,560
Speaker 1: are respectful and like and you're getting like something out

899
00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:57,680
Speaker 1: of it, it doesn't matter how old those women are.

900
00:36:57,719 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 1: I have tons of older I just went to dinner

901
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:02,279
Speaker 1: last night like three seventy year old women. They're way

902
00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 1: older than me. But like, I have friends that are

903
00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:05,719
Speaker 1: twenty years younger than me. I have friends that are

904
00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:08,400
Speaker 1: twenty years older than me. Wherever the light is, wherever

905
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:11,640
Speaker 1: those friendships, Like, you're gonna make other friends in your life.

906
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 1: This woman obviously, or this young woman that ghosted you,

907
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,680
Speaker 1: don't worry about her, Like I understand that hurts your feelings.

908
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:19,800
Speaker 1: It hurts all of our feelings when we get ghosted.

909
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:23,920
Speaker 1: But just move on with like the intention of being

910
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 1: open to friendships whatever shape or age or size they

911
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:30,319
Speaker 1: come in. You know what I mean, Because when you

912
00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:34,839
Speaker 1: have that attitude, I feel like that that has more

913
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:37,680
Speaker 1: of like a magnetic attraction and it brings people who

914
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:40,520
Speaker 1: are more like minded into your kind of sphere.

915
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,640
Speaker 3: And in the meantime, hang out with these older women.

916
00:37:43,800 --> 00:37:46,000
Speaker 1: That's fine. That's not going to be the rest of

917
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,440
Speaker 1: your life. You're going to make other friends. You're so young,

918
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:51,040
Speaker 1: you're twenty four years old, Like, you're going to meet

919
00:37:51,080 --> 00:37:53,840
Speaker 1: other people and you're going to figure out how to

920
00:37:53,920 --> 00:37:56,759
Speaker 1: maintain friendships for longer periods of time. It might not

921
00:37:56,840 --> 00:37:59,200
Speaker 1: have anything to do with you, quite honestly, is there

922
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 1: anything you can think of that you would have done

923
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:03,040
Speaker 1: to end any of these friendships?

924
00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 7: Or well, the last one she asked for money and

925
00:38:06,400 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 7: I said, I can't give you money, so bye. Like

926
00:38:10,640 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 7: she added me on everything and I thought it was

927
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:14,160
Speaker 7: because of money, but I'm like, there's no way she

928
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:15,920
Speaker 7: wanted to add me just because of money.

929
00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 5: Well cares listen, bye bye. Chelsea's so right. Also, I

930
00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:23,799
Speaker 5: think you need to just focus on what it is

931
00:38:23,800 --> 00:38:25,759
Speaker 5: that you want in a friendship, and then you're going

932
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:29,319
Speaker 5: to find that in good friends. It doesn't matter how

933
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 5: old they are. And like she said that, it's this

934
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 5: is all temporary. Who listen, girls can be really awful

935
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 5: to each other, and I like to think it's typically

936
00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:41,160
Speaker 5: around like six seventh eighth grade, but it's truthfully, sadly,

937
00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 5: can be much longer than that. And that's just not

938
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:45,480
Speaker 5: something you need to be around. The second you get

939
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:49,000
Speaker 5: a weird energy or you get ghosted, then happily let

940
00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 5: that go. Just figure out what is friendship mean to you,

941
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:52,799
Speaker 5: what is it that you're looking for, and if you're

942
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:55,239
Speaker 5: finding that an older woman for this small period of time,

943
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,160
Speaker 5: then enjoy it.

944
00:38:57,840 --> 00:39:00,280
Speaker 7: I'm worried that it is something I'm doing because because

945
00:39:00,320 --> 00:39:02,960
Speaker 7: I continuously have these like friends that I'll be with

946
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:05,200
Speaker 7: for like one to two years and then randomly they

947
00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:07,160
Speaker 7: just like ghost me. So I'm worried I am doing

948
00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:09,680
Speaker 7: something and I've been trying to note that, but I'm not.

949
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,160
Speaker 6: Sure how to like keep track of it.

950
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:15,400
Speaker 1: I hear what you're saying, but also, like a friend

951
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,440
Speaker 1: isn't just going to ghost you after one to two years.

952
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:21,479
Speaker 1: For I hate when you know, when I was growing

953
00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:23,760
Speaker 1: up and I had problems with like socially or whatever,

954
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,480
Speaker 1: those things don't go away. There's always people in your

955
00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:29,319
Speaker 1: life that are going to not be there permanently. But like,

956
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:33,000
Speaker 1: sometimes it really doesn't have anything to do with you.

957
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,920
Speaker 1: I'm not saying you're completely absolved of anything. You know,

958
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:39,520
Speaker 1: maybe you are doing something. But also people when as

959
00:39:39,520 --> 00:39:42,480
Speaker 1: you get older and more mature, people know that you're

960
00:39:42,480 --> 00:39:45,200
Speaker 1: not going to get one hundred percent of everything you

961
00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:47,920
Speaker 1: want out of every friendship. You kind of have to

962
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:52,040
Speaker 1: be willing to make mistakes or have people see all

963
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:54,279
Speaker 1: of you and still want to be friends with you.

964
00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:56,520
Speaker 3: Like that's the sign of a strong friendship.

965
00:39:56,800 --> 00:39:59,440
Speaker 1: So if somebody is fickle enough to kind of ditch

966
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:02,880
Speaker 1: you after something, like, you know it is important to

967
00:40:02,920 --> 00:40:05,360
Speaker 1: have self awareness and be aware of the kind of

968
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:06,760
Speaker 1: friend you are and not.

969
00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:08,720
Speaker 3: Maybe you know, not be too needy.

970
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 1: I don't know if these are any of the qualities

971
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:12,800
Speaker 1: that you might recognize in yourself. Not be too needy,

972
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,960
Speaker 1: not be too demanding, you know, not be putting so

973
00:40:16,120 --> 00:40:18,560
Speaker 1: much weight on every friendship, and just kind of go

974
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:21,360
Speaker 1: at it with a more ease, Like just think of

975
00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:24,719
Speaker 1: it as more of like it's an audition. It's not permanent,

976
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:26,680
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, And just to kind of

977
00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:29,680
Speaker 1: think of it in that way, like building blocks. It

978
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:32,360
Speaker 1: takes a long time to build a really solid friendship.

979
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:34,719
Speaker 1: It doesn't happen over six months. You know. That's kind

980
00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:38,280
Speaker 1: of like a almost like love bombing, but with friendships.

981
00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:42,360
Speaker 1: So just give yourself a little grace and the women

982
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:45,360
Speaker 1: that you are friends with, ask them if there's anything

983
00:40:45,440 --> 00:40:47,839
Speaker 1: odd about you or weird about you that they might

984
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:50,920
Speaker 1: recognize because they sound like real friends. Maybe they have

985
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:53,440
Speaker 1: some feedback because they know you better. But I wouldn't

986
00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:56,719
Speaker 1: focus on your shortcomings. I would really focus on just

987
00:40:56,760 --> 00:40:58,280
Speaker 1: your attitude towards friendship.

988
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:01,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, and even like this friend who ask for money, like,

989
00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:03,799
Speaker 2: it's likely not that she's mad at you for not

990
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:06,359
Speaker 2: giving her the money. She might be let's say, embarrassed

991
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,440
Speaker 2: that she asked, and you know, those sorts of things

992
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,680
Speaker 2: that she doesn't want the reminder. And I also just

993
00:41:10,719 --> 00:41:14,160
Speaker 2: think this like twenty two to twenty seven, friendships are

994
00:41:14,200 --> 00:41:16,360
Speaker 2: going to be changing. You know, it's not an easy

995
00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 2: thing to go through. But some of my best friends

996
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:21,320
Speaker 2: they didn't meet until I was like in my late twenties,

997
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:23,920
Speaker 2: and they're some of my closest people. But sometimes the

998
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:25,839
Speaker 2: people you meet in your twenties, like they're they're kind

999
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 2: of in and out for a couple of years. It's

1000
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:30,560
Speaker 2: just sort of a transient time friendship wise.

1001
00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:33,520
Speaker 7: Okay, yeah, yeah, that's just what I get told. I'm

1002
00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:36,080
Speaker 7: weird and off putting a lot. I am very blunt

1003
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 7: and I say what I mean, and I don't know

1004
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,359
Speaker 7: I'm not always unkind in the way I say things,

1005
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:44,839
Speaker 7: So I'm worried that could be it too. I just

1006
00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:46,799
Speaker 7: I feel like that's why older women get me, because

1007
00:41:46,840 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 7: it's like they say what they want, they say what

1008
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:50,240
Speaker 7: they mean, they don't take anyone's bullshit.

1009
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:52,520
Speaker 6: And that's how I am, That's how my mom raised

1010
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:52,880
Speaker 6: me to be.

1011
00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:55,760
Speaker 7: And so I feel like those friendships don't last because

1012
00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:58,439
Speaker 7: I can be too like this is what I want,

1013
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:00,319
Speaker 7: this is what I don't want right.

1014
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:01,840
Speaker 5: Well, do you like that about yourself?

1015
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:05,400
Speaker 6: I do. I get people think I'm way older than

1016
00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:07,000
Speaker 6: I am because of how I am.

1017
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:10,319
Speaker 5: Listen that there's nothing wrong with being upfront about what

1018
00:42:10,360 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 5: you want and blunt about what you think you would

1019
00:42:13,680 --> 00:42:16,200
Speaker 5: recognize if you were being unkind, I think, don't.

1020
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:20,799
Speaker 6: You Yeah, I don't I would I think I think so.

1021
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:22,800
Speaker 5: Too, And listen, don't be sorry. I think it's a

1022
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:26,239
Speaker 5: dangerous game to start micromanaging and really putting such a

1023
00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 5: microscope on every single thing that you're doing and trying

1024
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:30,200
Speaker 5: to figure out what you're doing wrong. I think you

1025
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,759
Speaker 5: need to just know what kind of person you want

1026
00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 5: to be, And seems like you're a pretty kind person

1027
00:42:35,920 --> 00:42:38,440
Speaker 5: who knows that you want friendships and knows that you're

1028
00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 5: going to be honest about how you feel about things.

1029
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:42,480
Speaker 5: There's nothing wrong with that, So I don't know. I

1030
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:45,920
Speaker 5: don't think you should be scouring every move to be like,

1031
00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:47,399
Speaker 5: did I do something wrong? Did I do something wrong?

1032
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:50,160
Speaker 5: Because that's not a way to live. Just be figure

1033
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:53,120
Speaker 5: out what your intentions are and focus on what it

1034
00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 5: is that you do want, and then enjoy the friendships

1035
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:57,280
Speaker 5: that you have, and then they'll just kind of keep coming.

1036
00:42:57,880 --> 00:42:59,040
Speaker 6: Okay, yeah, thank you.

1037
00:42:59,480 --> 00:43:02,400
Speaker 1: Don't edit your personality being blunt and being director. You're

1038
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:05,840
Speaker 1: going to find your people. I promise you will.

1039
00:43:06,239 --> 00:43:07,400
Speaker 2: And we like your energy.

1040
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:08,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm into it.

1041
00:43:09,719 --> 00:43:10,680
Speaker 6: Maybe we'd be friends.

1042
00:43:10,920 --> 00:43:13,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, your Chelsea Handler approved exactly.

1043
00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 6: All right, Kristin.

1044
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:17,360
Speaker 5: Thank Kristy check in with us.

1045
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:19,360
Speaker 6: All right, okay, thank you. Bye.

1046
00:43:19,520 --> 00:43:20,920
Speaker 1: We're going to take a break and we'll be right

1047
00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:27,319
Speaker 1: back to wrap up with Kitlyn Olsen and we're back

1048
00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:30,920
Speaker 1: with the magical Caitlyn Olson, who was so good at

1049
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:33,600
Speaker 1: dishing out confidence to young girls today.

1050
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 3: I love it. Health these young ladies, we have to

1051
00:43:37,680 --> 00:43:38,439
Speaker 3: build them up.

1052
00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:39,319
Speaker 5: I needed this.

1053
00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:40,839
Speaker 3: I know I needed it too.

1054
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:43,040
Speaker 5: I know I needed this when I was that age.

1055
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:45,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you so much for coming on. Congrats on

1056
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: all of your success. I wish you the best. I

1057
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:50,480
Speaker 1: can't wait to meet you in person one day.

1058
00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:53,279
Speaker 5: I can't believe we haven't met. I love you so much.

1059
00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 5: I can't wait to meet you too. Thank you for

1060
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:57,000
Speaker 5: everything you do. Very inspirational.

1061
00:43:57,160 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 3: Thank you, Take care, Thank you guys.

1062
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:03,920
Speaker 1: I just announced all my tour dates. It's called the

1063
00:44:04,080 --> 00:44:05,319
Speaker 1: High and Mighty Tour.

1064
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:09,759
Speaker 3: I will be touring from February through June, So go

1065
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:10,799
Speaker 3: get your tickets now.

1066
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:12,920
Speaker 1: If you want good seats and you want to come

1067
00:44:13,000 --> 00:44:15,400
Speaker 1: see me perform, I will be on the High and

1068
00:44:15,640 --> 00:44:16,200
Speaker 1: Mighty tour.

1069
00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:19,440
Speaker 2: Do you want advice from Chelsea? Right into Dear Chelsea

1070
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:23,080
Speaker 2: Podcast at gmail dot com. Find full video episodes of

1071
00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:26,280
Speaker 2: Dear Chelsea on YouTube by searching at Dear Chelsea Pod.

1072
00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 2: Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert executive

1073
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:33,239
Speaker 2: producer Catherine law And be sure to check out our

1074
00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:39,640
Speaker 2: merch at Chelseahandler dot com