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Speaker 1: Dearest John, It's been a fortnight since I felt your

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Speaker 1: warm embrace.

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Speaker 2: Dear Sam, such it has since we started the Okay

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Speaker 2: storytem podcast. Yes, and I have a message for you,

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Speaker 2: a delicious story that I think you'll love.

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Speaker 1: Sincerely Sam.

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Speaker 2: But before that, thine divine two minute outbreak must happen,

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Speaker 2: I bid thee farewell.

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Speaker 1: See you in two minutes. My mother wants to join

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Speaker 1: me and my husband's romantic vacation. We refuse.

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Speaker 3: Get a room, am I right?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, one that's not ours, preferably.

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Speaker 2: My husband and I have been married for one year

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Speaker 2: and since we first met we have wanted to go

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Speaker 2: to Europe together. We plan to start a family in

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Speaker 2: twenty sixteen, so this will be one of our last

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Speaker 2: chances to.

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Speaker 1: Go on a romantic trip with just the two.

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Speaker 2: And by the way, this comes from users Siena four

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Speaker 2: or five six And if you want to submit your

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Speaker 2: own stories, go to the r slash Okay Storytime subrenden.

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Speaker 1: So we're going to France in Ispana for ten days.

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Speaker 2: My husband is working eleven hour days to make extra money.

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Speaker 2: We have a very specific savings plan in action so

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Speaker 2: that we can afford this trip while still continuing to

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Speaker 2: save up for a house. I'm handling more than my

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Speaker 2: usual share of the household chore since he's been working

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Speaker 2: long days, so we are both very much in nose

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Speaker 2: to the grindstone mode when it comes to working and saving.

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Speaker 1: My mother loves to travel.

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Speaker 2: She has multiple trips planned this year and will be

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Speaker 2: in Europe for a few months at the same time

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Speaker 2: as us, but she doesn't have a return date yet,

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Speaker 2: so she's got options on win and where to leave from.

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Speaker 2: When I told her we booked our tickets, she immediately said.

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Speaker 3: Oh, that's great, I'll be in Europe too.

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Speaker 2: I'll just meet you in Bartholona and then fly back

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Speaker 2: to the US from there. I tried to politely say

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Speaker 2: that this is a romantic couple's trip, and I don't

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Speaker 2: think that my husband is particularly keen on having her.

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Speaker 1: Or anyone join us.

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Speaker 2: Shout out to my mom doing this to me when

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Speaker 2: I went to New York with my girlfriend. Really, Oh no,

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Speaker 2: She did the same thing when we went to Maui recently.

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Speaker 2: Suddenly she was all also going to Maui at the

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Speaker 2: same time and asked if she could stay with us.

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Speaker 2: My husband said okay, but learned from that experience that

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Speaker 2: my mom makes it all about her and what she

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Speaker 2: wants to do, and our privacy went straight out the window.

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Speaker 2: My mom can be quite focused on herself and not

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Speaker 2: take others into account. As a recent example, she said

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Speaker 2: she might want to go wine tasting for Mother's Day

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Speaker 2: and that we should ask my best friend to be

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Speaker 2: our designated driver. My best friend is married with a

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Speaker 2: two year old and another baby on the way. It

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Speaker 2: hadn't occurred to my mom that she would want to

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Speaker 2: celebrate Mother's Day with her child and family rather than

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Speaker 2: shuttling us to different wineries while pregnant, so she couldn't

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Speaker 2: even indulge in the tastings. Just an example of how

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Speaker 2: everything revolves around her and why having her join us

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Speaker 2: on the trip would be in sacrificing our ability to

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Speaker 2: do what we want and focus on our plans. Anyway,

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Speaker 2: the issue with the trip came to a head yesterday.

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Speaker 2: We celebrated Mother's Day on Saturday, since she lives about

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Speaker 2: three hours away, so that allowed for her to travel

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Speaker 2: back home. On Sunday, we went sightseeing in San Francisco,

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Speaker 2: where I live, and walked across the Golden Gate Bridge.

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Speaker 2: I treated her to a nice lunch at a place

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Speaker 2: of her choice. We went to a wine bar, and

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Speaker 2: then that evening, my husband and I took her out

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Speaker 2: to dinner, and then spent that evening playing poker, which

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Speaker 2: is her favorite game. The next morning, we made French

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Speaker 2: toast for breakfast, and I gave her a gift. As

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Speaker 2: she was getting ready to leave, she said, where's my card?

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Speaker 3: What you really need a card?

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Speaker 1: Come on, after all that, where's my piece of paper?

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Speaker 3: My piece of paper that I'm not gonna keep.

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Speaker 1: My mom's also weird about cards.

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Speaker 3: Really. My brother's anti cards.

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Speaker 4: He's like, you could just tell me happy birthday, you

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Speaker 4: don't need to write it on a card that I'm

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Speaker 4: gonna throw away.

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Speaker 1: She's not weird about cards.

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Speaker 2: She just like is a big fan of them, and

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Speaker 2: I just think that's a generational difference between us and them. Anyway,

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Speaker 2: I had been running around the day before to get

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Speaker 2: ready for her, and it slipped my mind. By the

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Speaker 2: time I realized it was too late, But I figured

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Speaker 2: we were spending so much quality time together that a

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Speaker 2: card wouldn't make much of a difference. She got really

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Speaker 2: upset about how I didn't even get her a card,

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Speaker 2: and then I started to get offended. I went out

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Speaker 2: of my way to make a nice weekend for her,

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Speaker 2: and she started acting like none of it mattered because

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Speaker 2: I didn't buy her a two ninety nine card from

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Speaker 2: the corner Store. She also complained that I hadn't written

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Speaker 2: a paragraph tribute to her on Facebook for Mother's Day

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Speaker 2: like all the other girls quote unquote. It's like, no,

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Speaker 2: I'm just not a big facebooker.

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Speaker 4: Facebook's confusing. There's too much going on over there on Facebook.

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Speaker 5: In my humble opinion, I usually just scroll and look

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Speaker 5: at the funny memes on Instagram and TikTok rotten Breen.

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Speaker 5: She left in a huff and then started texting me

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Speaker 5: that I'm rude, and she's actually also really hurt that

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Speaker 5: we didn't want to see her in Europe. That is

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Speaker 5: probably what the whole thing was about, since we'd been

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Speaker 5: discussing the trip the night before. I have been trying

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Speaker 5: to be so diplomatic about the trip and am basically

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Speaker 5: just communicating my boundaries with her. My husband does I

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Speaker 5: not want his mother in law along for our romantic

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Speaker 5: couples get away. He is working his booty off for

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Speaker 5: his vacation and does not want to compromise in the

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Speaker 5: interest of just being polite. My mom gets very entitled

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Speaker 5: and says, well, I'm the mother. You should be happy

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Speaker 5: to see me, and he should be happy to do.

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Speaker 1: What I want.

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Speaker 2: So my question is how do I resolve this? How

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Speaker 2: do I communicate that she is infringing on our trip

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Speaker 2: without hurting her feelings or getting into continued arguments. I

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Speaker 2: don't want to give in and say she can come,

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Speaker 2: but I also don't want her to feel rejected like

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Speaker 2: we don't want her around even though we will be

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Speaker 2: relatively close to each other in Europe at the same time,

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Speaker 2: how do I get her to understand while still sticking

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Speaker 2: up for myself and avoiding drama? And we have an

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Speaker 2: edit here, but before we get into that, Angie, what

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Speaker 2: would you do in this scenario? Your mom is like,

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Speaker 2: I demand to see you and Riley for ten days

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Speaker 2: while you're on a romantic trip in Europe.

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Speaker 3: That's just too much.

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Speaker 4: I think just you can calmly explain to the mom

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Speaker 4: and just be like, hey, we do love you. And

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Speaker 4: you have to repeat that a lot because she'll forget

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Speaker 4: as soon as she stops hearing those words. We do

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Speaker 4: love you and we love spending time with you, but

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Speaker 4: we originally planned this out as like a romantic getaway

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Speaker 4: for like some alone time. You know, maybe we can

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Speaker 4: like meet up for lunch at one point or something,

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Speaker 4: or have dinner together, because that would be cool. You know,

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Speaker 4: you happen to be traveling together. How often you do

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Speaker 4: see other people in a different country.

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Speaker 2: It would be like a fun thing to be like,

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Speaker 2: oh my god, we're having lunch at a cafe in Spain.

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Speaker 2: Isn't that crazy? Okay, that's the moment it has happened. Goodbye.

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Speaker 2: Now you can have the rest of your trip together. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I completely agree. I don't think there's a way, though,

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Speaker 2: SOPI was like, how do I do this without hurting

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Speaker 2: her feelings?

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Speaker 1: I don't think you can.

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Speaker 2: I think there's an element of her that probably will

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Speaker 2: still be upset even when you offer, like, let's do this,

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Speaker 2: let's do the lunch, let's spend maybe an afternoon together

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Speaker 2: instead of like multiple days or like half the trip whatever.

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Speaker 1: We have an edit A.

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Speaker 2: Lot of comments on me telling her my husband doesn't

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Speaker 2: want her there, but not saying that I don't want

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Speaker 2: her there. I phrased things as we but try to

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Speaker 2: also point out my husband's take because for years she

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Speaker 2: has seen me as her travel partner and doesn't seem

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Speaker 2: to get that I'm married now and we have to

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Speaker 2: take his feelings and wants into account when discussing his

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Speaker 2: slash our vacation. It's my attempt at trying to get

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Speaker 2: her to see that my situation has changed and bunking

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Speaker 2: together on vacations isn't an option anymore. I could probably

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Speaker 2: own it more though, as she doesn't seem to get

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Speaker 2: the point anyway.

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Speaker 1: And now we have an update.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but the fun thing is is that you can leave,

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Speaker 2: don't let her into the hotel room, don't let her

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Speaker 2: stay with you at the hotel. Well, let's get into

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Speaker 2: the update. I did want to clear up one big misconception.

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Speaker 2: In the interest of brevity, I didn't include every conversation

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Speaker 2: that I had with my mom in which I told

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Speaker 2: her no, and instead wrote my most important reason, which

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Speaker 2: is that my husband should not have to compromise on

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Speaker 2: his vacation to keep someone in my family happy. A

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Speaker 2: lot of people took this to me and I was

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Speaker 2: throwing him under the bus, when in reality the.

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Speaker 1: Conversation went more like this.

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Speaker 2: Actually, this is a romantic couple's trip mom, not a

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Speaker 2: family vacation, and then we might actually be trying to

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Speaker 2: make a baby on this trip, so it's kind of

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Speaker 2: private time.

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Speaker 3: So that's a nicer way to say.

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Speaker 1: He's gonna friging even pregnate me. I'm beingpregnated on this trip.

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Speaker 3: Just stay back.

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Speaker 4: You gotta use choice words when talking to family. Saying

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Speaker 4: that you're trying for a baby is the nicest way

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Speaker 4: that you could put that, the nicest pg way that

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Speaker 4: you could put that.

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Speaker 2: You already did this when we went to Maui. This

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Speaker 2: is just for the two of us. And finally, do

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Speaker 2: you really think that husband is going to want his

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Speaker 2: mother in law along for a romantic getaway?

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Speaker 1: So Opie said all of these things.

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Speaker 2: That being said, I did find the advice to leave

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Speaker 2: him out completely really helpful. As someone pointed out that

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Speaker 2: I don't want to give her the opportunity to pinpoint

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Speaker 2: him as being the problem and place blame there, So

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Speaker 2: moving forward, I left him out completely. A couple of

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Speaker 2: days after the fight, I called my aunt, my mom's sister,

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Speaker 2: who is the reasonable version of my mother. She agreed

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Speaker 2: that I was right to tell her she's crossing a line,

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Speaker 2: but also had some insight that I hadn't yet heard.

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Speaker 2: Two of her kids have gotten married in the last

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Speaker 2: couple of years, and she said that as a mom

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Speaker 2: it's been really hard to adjust to sharing her kids

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Speaker 2: with a new spouse and in laws, that as a

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Speaker 2: mom it can be a painful process, but that it

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Speaker 2: comes along with the job, and she's had to learn

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Speaker 2: to let go and not take it personally. Since I've

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Speaker 2: always been my mom's traveling partner and I am an

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Speaker 2: only child and she doesn't have a boyfriend or spouse,

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Speaker 2: this is a change and my mom needs to learn

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Speaker 2: that even though it hurts her, we aren't doing anything

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Speaker 2: wrong or unreasonable by requesting our privacy. So after all

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Speaker 2: my helpful redditors telling me I need to lay down

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Speaker 2: the line, not to give in and not to compromise,

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Speaker 2: and then the validating conversation with my aunt, I felt

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Speaker 2: completely ready to call my mom one week later and

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Speaker 2: try to knock some sense into her. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if that's the phrasing I would use in that case,

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Speaker 2: but let's continue. I use talking points such as, this

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Speaker 2: trip is not meant to exclude you specifically, we are

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Speaker 2: not inviting anyone else. There will be a family vacation

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Speaker 2: in the future. This is just not one of them.

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Speaker 2: This relationship is a to a street. Neither of us

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Speaker 2: owes the other anything, and we are in each other's

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Speaker 2: lives by choice.

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Speaker 1: You need to respect my boundaries and I will do

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Speaker 1: the same.

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Speaker 2: Yea, guys, it was like talking to a brick wallvy.

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Speaker 2: She was still even throwing a fit about the stupid card.

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Speaker 2: I was prepared for the fact that she might not

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Speaker 2: see anything past her own nose, so I ended the

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Speaker 2: conversation by saying, I want you to talk to my

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Speaker 2: aunt to get some clarity on this for your own sake.

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Speaker 2: I am not changing my mind. Over the weekend, she

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Speaker 2: left a message and started texting me. She didn't reference

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Speaker 2: the fight or the trip. It was as if if

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Speaker 2: nothing had happened. I'm not really sure what this means

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Speaker 2: or if I should dig any deeper, but I think

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Speaker 2: it means I won the battle. I have learned a

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Speaker 2: valuable lesson in telling her more details than she needs

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Speaker 2: to know. And by the way, you can listen to

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Speaker 2: all kinds of details that I think you really need

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Speaker 2: to know in the full episodes with stories like this

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Speaker 2: that you can find on Spotify and iHeartRadio and Apple podcasts.

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Speaker 2: Wherever you listen to podcasts, all you gotta do is

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Speaker 2: search Okay story Time, and there you'll find over twelve

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Speaker 2: hundred and seventy hours worth of stories for you to

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Speaker 2: listen to.

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Speaker 1: That's crazy. Can you imagine like a twelve hundred and

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Speaker 1: seventy hour movie?

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Speaker 3: I cannot.

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Speaker 1: You've got one, but it's got no pictures and it's

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Speaker 1: just in your ears.

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Speaker 3: Longest audiobook ever.

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Speaker 1: Wherever you listen, you can listen to the movie of

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime. There's a little bit more left. I like

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Speaker 1: what we've done.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I think Ope explained it in the best way possible.

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Speaker 4: And at the very end, you, you know, acknowledge that

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Speaker 4: you simply can't explain anything to this mom and she's

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Speaker 4: not understanding anything, So just yeah, send her off to

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Speaker 4: the ant who can do better.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like she gained perspective from her sister, But let's

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Speaker 2: go finish the rest of the story. My husband and

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Speaker 2: I were actually reviewing our itinerary and realized that it

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Speaker 2: would be very easy to meet with her for one

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Speaker 2: day in Bartholona without disrupting our trip too much.

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Speaker 3: See, she didn't get perspective from the ant.

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Speaker 2: This is the realization that it's like, oh, I guess

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Speaker 2: we could just meet her for lunch.

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Speaker 1: And it's like, you've done all this. If you want

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Speaker 1: to just like realize that we could just literally meet

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Speaker 1: her for lunch.

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Speaker 2: Get bypassed all of this like turmoil. She's been like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: we'll get lunch, just lunch.

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Speaker 1: Though he said.

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Speaker 2: He's open a meeting with her, But at this point,

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Speaker 2: I feel like it's rewarding a child for bad behavior. Really,

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Speaker 2: you've just already dug your heels into far we're now.

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Speaker 2: It's kind of embarrassing to change her mind. I fought

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Speaker 2: really hard to get our space, and for that alone,

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Speaker 2: I'm not willing to budge for what it's worth. He

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Speaker 2: looked relieved when I said this. So I am sticking

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Speaker 2: my heels in the ground for both of our sakes,

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Speaker 2: and that is the end of that story. And hey,

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Speaker 2: it's fair. I would probably do the same thing. If

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Speaker 2: you go through all that and then you realize like, oh, dang,

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Speaker 2: maybe we could, it's like, no, no, no, you've already

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Speaker 2: done so much to not have it happen. You're now

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Speaker 2: committed to it not happening.

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Speaker 1: Entirely.

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Speaker 3: My mother won't stop competing with my husband. But he's deceased.

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Speaker 1: I think you.

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Speaker 3: Lost that one girl. My husband, Charlie, was the love

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Speaker 3: of my life. We were together for eight years, married

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Speaker 3: for five of those years. He was the man I

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Speaker 3: was going to spend the rest of my life with.

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Speaker 3: He was one of the sweetest people I've ever known,

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Speaker 3: and he loved and supported me through everything. We had

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Speaker 3: plans to have kids and start a family. By the way,

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Speaker 3: this comes from Kuka and if you want to submit

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Speaker 3: your own stories, go to our slush okay story to

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Speaker 3: him supparate it.

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Speaker 1: So.

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Speaker 3: Two years ago he was diagnosed with a terminal illness.

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Speaker 3: He passed away last April.

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Speaker 1: That's terrible.

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Speaker 3: That was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.

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Speaker 3: I don't feel like I'll ever be able to be

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Speaker 3: with anyone again. I still love him more than anything,

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Speaker 3: and I think I always will. It's been very hard

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Speaker 3: for me, but I've been going to therapy and grief counseling,

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Speaker 3: so I'm doing okay. My mother has moved in with

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Speaker 3: me this year to help me with the bills, groceries,

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Speaker 3: et cetera. I was very hesitant to have her move

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Speaker 3: in with me, but I needed the financial help, and

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Speaker 3: I thought that having her around might be comforting and

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Speaker 3: better than being alone. The first few weeks were fine.

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Speaker 3: We talked about normal things, and Charlie didn't really come

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Speaker 3: up unless I was talking about a happy or funny memory.

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Speaker 3: Then slowly my mom started to mention him more and more.

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Speaker 3: At first she asked why I still had pictures of

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Speaker 3: him hung up around the house. What because he existed,

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Speaker 3: because that was the love of Opie's life. And also

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Speaker 3: it's not that you ever have to get rid of pictures,

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Speaker 3: but it's also been like not that long. I told

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Speaker 3: her that I liked having the pictures around because they

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Speaker 3: reminded me of him in a positive way. She started

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Speaker 3: asking if I still loved him, and I said, yes.

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Speaker 3: Your mom's crazy. Recently, she's been talking about him a lot,

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Speaker 3: and in a fairly cruel way. She'll say things like

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Speaker 3: he probably wouldn't have been able to take care of

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Speaker 3: you and your kids, or he wasn't that great of

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Speaker 3: a guy. I've called her out and asked her to

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Speaker 3: stop multiple times, and she initially apologizes, but then goes

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Speaker 3: right back to talking about him. What she was saying

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Speaker 3: really upset me and to be honest, pissed me the

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Speaker 3: f off. A few days ago, I found one of

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Speaker 3: my favorite pictures of Charlie. It was actually one of

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Speaker 3: her wedding photos, with the frame smashed and the photo

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Speaker 3: ripped up. I confronted my mom about it, and she

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Speaker 3: said she did it. I asked her why she would

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Speaker 3: do something like that, and she said, he's passed away.

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Speaker 3: What about me?

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Speaker 1: I'm here with you right now.

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Speaker 3: What if I die? I'm just trying to help you

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Speaker 3: move on, sweetheart. I was pissed off. I don't understand

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Speaker 3: how she could do something so mean and then make

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Speaker 3: my husband's death about her. I yelled at her and

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Speaker 3: said some not so nice things to her. Guess what

355
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Speaker 3: she did? Turned it right back on me and played

356
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Speaker 3: to the victim. I was just trying to help you

357
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Speaker 3: move on? How could you see such mean things to me?

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Speaker 4: Yoh?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Is me?

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Speaker 3: I think the next step is to kick her out

361
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Speaker 3: of my home, but I want some outside opinions before

362
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Speaker 3: I make any decisions. I'm angry and not thinking clearly,

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Speaker 3: so I'd like some advice on what I should do next.

364
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:20,920
Speaker 3: Am I overreacting? Should I give her another chance? What

365
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,560
Speaker 3: do you think? Because we got an update. Does the

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Speaker 3: mom live with her? It seems that Opie's mom moved

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Speaker 3: in with her post her husband passing to kind of

368
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Speaker 3: help her out with like financials and stuff, and is

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Speaker 3: now I guess using that as a way to, you know,

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Speaker 3: say like, oh, well, you owe me, like you should

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Speaker 3: have more pictures of me in your house.

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Speaker 4: I mean, I don't know if I would go to

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Speaker 4: kicking her out just yet, but definitely like I would

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Speaker 4: let myself be mad at her for a while and

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Speaker 4: like maybe not talk to her that much.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know if you have to necessarily be

377
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Speaker 3: like you have to get out of my house, but

378
00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:56,040
Speaker 3: I think you could say I don't know if us

379
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:58,920
Speaker 3: living together is working because I'm still kind of in

380
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Speaker 3: this really emotional state and trying to work through that.

381
00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:05,000
Speaker 3: And I don't think that your methods are very effective.

382
00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:08,040
Speaker 3: And I want you in my life and you're important,

383
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:11,879
Speaker 3: but there is no competition between you and my deceased husband,

384
00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:13,360
Speaker 3: and you're making one.

385
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Speaker 4: Absolutely or just like trying to explain like or set

386
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Speaker 4: some ground rules, like you are living under my roof,

387
00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:23,399
Speaker 4: so you can't control like what pictures I put up

388
00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:25,359
Speaker 4: if you want me to put up more pictures of you.

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Speaker 4: If that's what this is about, then like we chart whatever,

390
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,520
Speaker 4: but like you cannot rip up a picture of my

391
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Speaker 4: deceased husband.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: The only thing I worry about is if she stays,

394
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Speaker 3: you know, if she gott to try this again.

395
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Speaker 1: The craziest thing is she already won. Mom's alive.

396
00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:45,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, you get to spend time with your daughter. I

397
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:48,680
Speaker 3: don't understand why you're trying to, you know, one up

398
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:52,560
Speaker 3: her deceased husband exactly, but there is an update. First off,

399
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Speaker 3: I want to thank everyone for the advice and condolences.

400
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,360
Speaker 3: I think it's important to add that my mother has

401
00:17:57,480 --> 00:18:01,600
Speaker 3: always been like this, just never to this extent. This

402
00:18:01,760 --> 00:18:04,560
Speaker 3: is a new loafer. Growing up, she would often twist

403
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:07,640
Speaker 3: things around to make them about her. The neighbor's cat died,

404
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:11,000
Speaker 3: it's about art. Your father lost a job, Oh doubt

405
00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:14,560
Speaker 3: terrible for me, this isn't anything new. I'm a fairly

406
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:18,000
Speaker 3: small person five three, and she's considerably bigger than I am.

407
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,520
Speaker 3: And someone mentioned that it's possible she could get physically

408
00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 3: harmful with me in your future, which really scared me.

409
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:27,080
Speaker 3: I don't know if she'd ever resort to physical violence,

410
00:18:27,119 --> 00:18:29,679
Speaker 3: but the possibility is there, and the thought alone is

411
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:32,400
Speaker 3: causing me a lot of distress. When I think about it,

412
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:35,359
Speaker 3: it doesn't seem too far fetched, especially if I do

413
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:38,600
Speaker 3: something to make her angry. I was desperate for financial

414
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,320
Speaker 3: help and for company, so I made the mistake of

415
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,199
Speaker 3: letting her live with me. I've decided to serve her

416
00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:46,919
Speaker 3: and eviction notice and stay out of her way until

417
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Speaker 3: she's gone. I've gathered up all my possessions related to

418
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Speaker 3: Charlie and I've put them somewhere safe. I'm going to

419
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:55,119
Speaker 3: contact my wedding photographer and see if I can get

420
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Speaker 3: another copy of the photo my mother destroyed. I won't

421
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:02,520
Speaker 3: tolerate her destroying my memories of Charlie or tainting my

422
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:05,520
Speaker 3: memories of him with her crappy behavior. I don't want

423
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,439
Speaker 3: to leave my house because this is the home I

424
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 3: shared most of my memories with Charlie, and it's my

425
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:13,399
Speaker 3: effing house. I'm not going to be chased out of

426
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:16,200
Speaker 3: my own home by my mother. Instead, I've been looking

427
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,159
Speaker 3: for a new roommate to help with the bills. I

428
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,240
Speaker 3: want to thank the people that reassured me that I

429
00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:22,800
Speaker 3: should take my time and grieve in my way. It

430
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:25,840
Speaker 3: hasn't even been a year since Charlie passed away. I

431
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:28,040
Speaker 3: know now that it's okay if it takes me a

432
00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 3: long time to process the grief, it's okay that I

433
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,480
Speaker 3: still love him and will for the rest of my life.

434
00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:36,440
Speaker 3: I'm not under any obligation to forget or replace him.

435
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:40,159
Speaker 3: He was my husband, life partner, and best friend. I

436
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,439
Speaker 3: will remember him and love him until the day I

437
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:45,160
Speaker 3: pass away. Thank you for all your help. I'm going

438
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:47,159
Speaker 3: to go through some of your responses and respond to

439
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:50,639
Speaker 3: them personally. The support you've all provided is wonderful and

440
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,000
Speaker 3: it means a lot to me. And there is a

441
00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:55,840
Speaker 3: second update. Yeah, I mean, you don't ever have to

442
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:59,280
Speaker 3: stop thinking about your husband. That's not gonna be something

443
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,119
Speaker 3: that's just gonna like go away in a year. Definitely,

444
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,040
Speaker 3: not any time soon. Someone that you're going to love

445
00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 3: and miss for the rest of your life. And that's okay.

446
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:10,560
Speaker 3: That's not like a problem that should be fixed right.

447
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:13,720
Speaker 3: Moving on doesn't mean forgetting. But there is a second update.

448
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,280
Speaker 3: I officially sat my mother down and told her that

449
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,199
Speaker 3: she was no longer welcome in my home and she

450
00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 3: will have to leave within thirty days. I did this

451
00:20:23,359 --> 00:20:25,439
Speaker 3: about an hour or two ago, but didn't feel like

452
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,720
Speaker 3: writing an update or edit immediately. I replied to some

453
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:33,080
Speaker 3: other comments and messages because, as you've probably expected, the

454
00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:36,119
Speaker 3: conversation did not go well, and it left me pretty

455
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 3: emotionally bruised. She got angry and said some incredibly hurtful

456
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:41,040
Speaker 3: things to me.

457
00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:44,000
Speaker 6: She said, you should just get over Charlie already and

458
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:46,960
Speaker 6: focus on what you have. You have me, I dropped

459
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,359
Speaker 6: everything to come help you. Now you're being an honor

460
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:52,840
Speaker 6: appreciative witch and dwelling on an a hole. Blah blah

461
00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:55,800
Speaker 6: blah blah blah, hurtful crap blah blah blah, feel bad

462
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,360
Speaker 6: for me, blah blah blah blah blah, terrible things about

463
00:20:58,440 --> 00:20:59,880
Speaker 6: Charlie blah blah terrible.

464
00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:04,080
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, that was a lot of blah blah,

465
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,600
Speaker 3: too much blah blah. Getting out of there. Yeah, I

466
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,040
Speaker 3: mean kind of expected that this is how she would

467
00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:12,240
Speaker 3: react to you kicking her out right, I think that

468
00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:15,000
Speaker 3: very fair way of you doing. You know, like you

469
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,080
Speaker 3: gave her the thirty days. You didn't just say get

470
00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:20,480
Speaker 3: your crap and move. Yeah, and she just doesn't seem

471
00:21:20,520 --> 00:21:21,760
Speaker 3: like a very pleasant person.

472
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:25,240
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is not gonna change Ope's mind at all.

473
00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:28,800
Speaker 4: This is just making her more like strong in her decision.

474
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 4: So mission failed, mission failed. She's just gonna want to

475
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,679
Speaker 4: get you out there sooner, exactly. I sat there for

476
00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:38,480
Speaker 4: a minute in silence because I was just so shocked

477
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:40,840
Speaker 4: and appalled at what she was saying to me and

478
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:45,160
Speaker 4: what she was saying about Charlie. I got very, very angry.

479
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:50,479
Speaker 4: I said, you're a selfish, disgusting piece of crap. I

480
00:21:50,520 --> 00:21:54,199
Speaker 4: can't believe you're my mother. How dare you to disrespect Charlie,

481
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:57,800
Speaker 4: me and my home? How dare you? I'm not going

482
00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:00,480
Speaker 4: to get over him. I loved and still of him

483
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,360
Speaker 4: more than anything. I love him more than I love you.

484
00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:05,639
Speaker 4: If you're gonna wait around for me to forget about

485
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:09,040
Speaker 4: and stop loving Charlie, then sorry, you'll be waiting forever.

486
00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:12,000
Speaker 4: He was none of those horrible, nasty things you just said.

487
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:15,959
Speaker 4: He was the kindest, gentlest and most supportive person in

488
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,760
Speaker 4: my life. He loved me and cared about my feelings,

489
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:20,879
Speaker 4: which is more than I can say about you. I

490
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:23,639
Speaker 4: am still grieving. I will grieve as long as I want.

491
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:28,359
Speaker 4: You're awful, truly, absolutely one hundred percent awful. Get out

492
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 4: of my house boom. Good on you, OPI that was

493
00:22:31,119 --> 00:22:32,200
Speaker 4: a great response.

494
00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:35,520
Speaker 3: Good on you. Yeah, good for you for sure. But

495
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,640
Speaker 3: you know what would be good for you, guys listening

496
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 3: to full episodes of stories just like this. Just go

497
00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:43,880
Speaker 3: to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search a booking

498
00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:46,200
Speaker 3: story time you wait. It's good for you, so good

499
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 3: for you. Ten out of ten doctors recommend. Oh yeah,

500
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:50,280
Speaker 3: but there's a little bit left to the story. Do

501
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:51,560
Speaker 3: you have any final thoughts?

502
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,119
Speaker 4: I am so glad that she's stated up for herself

503
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:56,879
Speaker 4: and not just dealing with this behavior. I feel like

504
00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,320
Speaker 4: we said, you know, we probably would have gone to

505
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:01,200
Speaker 4: not kicking out right away.

506
00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:02,880
Speaker 3: But if this is.

507
00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:06,199
Speaker 4: Something that she's always been doing, obviously Op knows her

508
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,000
Speaker 4: mom more than we do, then I don't think this

509
00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:09,240
Speaker 4: is like a bad decision.

510
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:12,200
Speaker 3: No, and again, she's still given her those thirty days.

511
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,040
Speaker 3: Very polite of her. But there's a little bit more

512
00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:17,199
Speaker 3: to the story. She yelled at me more, but I

513
00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:19,720
Speaker 3: don't even remember what she was saying. She got up

514
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:22,160
Speaker 3: and left the house. I'm not sure where she went,

515
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:24,240
Speaker 3: but she'll have to come back to get her stuff,

516
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,200
Speaker 3: so I'm getting prepared for that. I'm not sure how

517
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:29,919
Speaker 3: to describe how I'm feeling right now, but it's a

518
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:33,640
Speaker 3: mixture of relief and I'm feeling upset. I went through

519
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:35,720
Speaker 3: with it, and she's finally going to be out of

520
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,840
Speaker 3: here soon. I have my friend on standby in case

521
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:41,399
Speaker 3: I need a crash at his place. And that is

522
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:45,480
Speaker 3: the end of that story, all right. I can't believe

523
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:46,359
Speaker 3: like you would say, that's.

524
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:48,119
Speaker 4: Your own daughter, but it sounds like, oh, P is

525
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:53,240
Speaker 4: dealing with it properly, taking out the trash. My mother

526
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:57,120
Speaker 4: was taking my tip money. I confronted her about it.

527
00:23:57,359 --> 00:23:59,359
Speaker 4: Did someone tip you off about that?

528
00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:02,960
Speaker 3: Oh? Oh? So I'm nineteen and I live at home

529
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:05,200
Speaker 3: with my mom, dad, and two younger sisters.

530
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:07,320
Speaker 4: I work at a restaurant as a waitress, and I

531
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,959
Speaker 4: commute from home to school. I love my parents and

532
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:13,280
Speaker 4: sisters and have a solid relationship with them. My dad

533
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:15,439
Speaker 4: is helping me pay for college, and I drive a

534
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:17,679
Speaker 4: car that he leases for cheap from his work, so

535
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,960
Speaker 4: I can focus on college, extracurriculars and saving money. I

536
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:22,919
Speaker 4: don't fight with them often, and they give me a

537
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:24,800
Speaker 4: pretty good amount of freedom when I come and go,

538
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:27,280
Speaker 4: recognizing that I am an adult.

539
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 3: That's what we like to see. Yeah, you are an adult. Yes.

540
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,040
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Princess of Salt And

541
00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:34,399
Speaker 4: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

542
00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:34,879
Speaker 4: the Arslash.

543
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:36,199
Speaker 3: Okay, storytime is separate it.

544
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,639
Speaker 4: That being said, my family has a long history of

545
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,360
Speaker 4: mental illness. I have posted on Reddit before about how

546
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:45,000
Speaker 4: my youngest sister has neurological and psychotic disorders and my

547
00:24:45,080 --> 00:24:47,600
Speaker 4: mother has sefere By a polar disorder. One of my

548
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:49,880
Speaker 4: biggest struggles over the years is my mom has been

549
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 4: her manic episodes. She will go to stores and buy

550
00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,600
Speaker 4: thousands of dollars of clothing with my dad's money. She

551
00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:57,880
Speaker 4: doesn't have a job, she can't hold a job because

552
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 4: of her anxiety and bipolar behavior, and we'll stay in

553
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:03,280
Speaker 4: bed all day on her worst days.

554
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,680
Speaker 3: On her good days, she will be really.

555
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:08,160
Speaker 4: Happy and go buy herself a three hundred dollars designer

556
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:08,880
Speaker 4: purse or two.

557
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 3: That is a lot of money. That's a lot of

558
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,679
Speaker 3: money there, It's a lot. Yeah.

559
00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 4: My dad makes a pretty good salary, like very very good,

560
00:25:17,080 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 4: and she has a one thousand dollars budget each month

561
00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 4: for her to go shopping, pay for gas so she

562
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:24,600
Speaker 4: can go places, go out to eat, with her friends

563
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:26,600
Speaker 4: and sisters and whatever else.

564
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:27,080
Speaker 3: She wants to do.

565
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:30,360
Speaker 4: She blows through it and steals my dad's credit card

566
00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:33,080
Speaker 4: or checkbook and will rack up the debt and then

567
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 4: lie about it. Oh wow, she is very ill. But

568
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:39,520
Speaker 4: we had honestly thought that she had been getting better

569
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,600
Speaker 4: with age. My dad has stuck with her, probably partly

570
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:44,679
Speaker 4: because he knows that she will never be able to

571
00:25:44,720 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 4: live on her own, and partly because he would be

572
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:51,040
Speaker 4: lonely without her. Okay, So fast forward to now. I

573
00:25:51,119 --> 00:25:53,560
Speaker 4: work as a waitress, and where I work, we leave

574
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,399
Speaker 4: with all of our tips in cash every night, so

575
00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 4: I end up having large amounts of bills on me

576
00:25:58,600 --> 00:25:59,200
Speaker 4: at one time.

577
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:00,800
Speaker 3: It's something weird.

578
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:03,400
Speaker 4: Over the past four months, many times I would come

579
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:06,240
Speaker 4: home exhausted from work and leave my server book out

580
00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:09,000
Speaker 4: with money in it overnight, just sitting on my dresser.

581
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,880
Speaker 4: Note I have my own room, and I would wake

582
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:13,919
Speaker 4: up to go put it in a little safe I

583
00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 4: have in my room the next day, and some of

584
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 4: it would be unaccounted for. It would just be twenty

585
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,960
Speaker 4: dollars here or five dollars there that wouldn't be there.

586
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:24,920
Speaker 4: But I always made up an excuse in my head.

587
00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:27,440
Speaker 4: That I miscounted the night before at work and didn't

588
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,800
Speaker 4: make as much as I thought, or I was careless

589
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:31,720
Speaker 4: and misplaced some of it on my walk to my car.

590
00:26:32,359 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 4: A few times I said something about it to my dad,

591
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,119
Speaker 4: middle sister, and mom, but they always said that they

592
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 4: had no idea. I remember one particular instance, like five

593
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 4: months ago, where I misplaced sixty dollars from my book

594
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 4: and was crying and looking for it frantically because I

595
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:48,359
Speaker 4: was using that money to get a gift for a

596
00:26:48,359 --> 00:26:51,080
Speaker 4: friend's birthday. But my mom and dad just brushed it

597
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:54,200
Speaker 4: off as me being careless, which admittedly I am.

598
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:54,520
Speaker 2: Yeah.

599
00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:57,440
Speaker 3: The Mom's like, yeah, you were so careless you left

600
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,320
Speaker 3: it out for me to grab. Yeah, what was I

601
00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,800
Speaker 3: supposed to do? Really, be more careful next time. You

602
00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:06,200
Speaker 3: didn't put your name on your money. Yeah, I didn't

603
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:07,040
Speaker 3: see your name on there.

604
00:27:07,119 --> 00:27:08,959
Speaker 4: So I just got in the habit of every night

605
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:10,840
Speaker 4: when I get home from work, I'd immediately take my

606
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:13,640
Speaker 4: money to my room, recount it, put a rubber band

607
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:16,240
Speaker 4: around it and a sticky note with the date and amount,

608
00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:19,040
Speaker 4: and put it in my safe. Then I'd take all

609
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:20,680
Speaker 4: the money and deposit it to the bank at the

610
00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:23,520
Speaker 4: end of the week. Still, sometimes when I'd forget to

611
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 4: put my money in the safe until the next day,

612
00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:28,199
Speaker 4: there would be less money in the safe than what

613
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:30,600
Speaker 4: I left from work with, so the safe.

614
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:32,480
Speaker 3: Isn't even working. She figured out the code to that.

615
00:27:32,720 --> 00:27:34,439
Speaker 3: But the thing is like, at that point, if you

616
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 3: were like putting money in the safe and you notice

617
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:40,280
Speaker 3: there's less money in the safe, at that point, you've

618
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 3: got to be like, I'm not just losing it anymore.

619
00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 3: Someone is actively you know, yeah, she's literally being like gaslighted.

620
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 3: And then you have to go a step further and say, well,

621
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:53,800
Speaker 3: who do I know in my family that has a

622
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:56,960
Speaker 3: habit of taking money? Like deductive reasoning.

623
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:59,120
Speaker 5: Here, Yeah, it's so funny to be like opied literally

624
00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 5: did everything around, like he's tracking your money.

625
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,359
Speaker 1: And even then you're like, did I get that right? Yeah?

626
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:07,159
Speaker 3: No, That's what I'm saying, Like OPI's like maybe I

627
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 3: forgot like I did fail safe after failsafe, Maybe it's

628
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:13,359
Speaker 3: just me. Yeah, Like ifop didn't know about the mom

629
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:15,120
Speaker 3: this would make so much more sense because I would

630
00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:17,119
Speaker 3: also be like, maybe I just forgot about it or

631
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:20,000
Speaker 3: something right, feeling like you're going crazy. But because we

632
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,560
Speaker 3: know about the mom make those connections.

633
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, tonight was one of those nights where I forgot

634
00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,200
Speaker 4: to put the money in the safe right away.

635
00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:28,639
Speaker 3: I threw my book on the dresser and went to shower.

636
00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:30,720
Speaker 4: After I got out of the shower, I noticed my

637
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,880
Speaker 4: book was open and the money wasn't in the pocket anymore,

638
00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:34,679
Speaker 4: which was weird.

639
00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:36,720
Speaker 3: All of the money was gone this time.

640
00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:40,520
Speaker 4: I guess it was imagining things, Opie, but none was missing.

641
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:42,880
Speaker 3: I think it was like either like taken out or

642
00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 3: like put in a different place, you know, because I

643
00:28:45,520 --> 00:28:47,400
Speaker 3: think it was like in a wallet or something, and

644
00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,560
Speaker 3: so it was like taken out of so it wasn't

645
00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:51,160
Speaker 3: in the pocket, but it was in a different part

646
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:53,840
Speaker 3: of the wallet. Yeah, I think so. For some reason,

647
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:56,360
Speaker 3: I'm thinking of like a waiter's bill, and it's like

648
00:28:56,440 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 3: instead of that little pocket that you put the money in,

649
00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:00,160
Speaker 3: it's like on the outside of it.

650
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:03,040
Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, probably. Then I went downstairs and my dad

651
00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:05,440
Speaker 4: called me to our basement. He closed the door and

652
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:07,360
Speaker 4: said that he needed to tell me something. He told

653
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,720
Speaker 4: me that he caught my mom taking the money from

654
00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 4: my server book while I was in the shower. He

655
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:15,000
Speaker 4: asked her what she was doing as she walked out

656
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:17,480
Speaker 4: of my room with twenty five dollars, and she said

657
00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 4: nothing and tried to hide it. He took the money

658
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 4: from her, asked if she had been stealing from me,

659
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,440
Speaker 4: and when she said nothing, he went and put the

660
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 4: money back in my room. He said he didn't even

661
00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:30,560
Speaker 4: know what to say to her. I told him about

662
00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 4: my money going missing over the past few months, and

663
00:29:32,400 --> 00:29:35,240
Speaker 4: he said, I have no doubt it was her. Just

664
00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:37,200
Speaker 4: lock up your money every night.

665
00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:39,479
Speaker 3: But she's been doing it and it's still not working.

666
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:42,840
Speaker 3: It's still gone. I think that it's only gone when

667
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,320
Speaker 3: she's not putting in the safe now.

668
00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:48,080
Speaker 4: She said that even in the safe sometimes she would

669
00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 4: go back and then.

670
00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:53,000
Speaker 3: Change your password. I don't know. Yeah, and don't tell anyone. Yeah.

671
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 3: I think you just need to like operate under the

672
00:29:55,680 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 3: idea that you cannot tell your mom anything about your

673
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:58,640
Speaker 3: money for sure.

674
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:00,840
Speaker 4: Then I asked if I should confront her about it,

675
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:02,600
Speaker 4: and my dad said that he wasn't sure what to

676
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:04,920
Speaker 4: even do, but he didn't know what good would come

677
00:30:04,920 --> 00:30:07,400
Speaker 4: from confronting her. She never admits when she makes a

678
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 4: mistake and was extremely embarrassed to be caught. I am

679
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 4: so distraught and I feel like my trust has been

680
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 4: majorly violated.

681
00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:17,200
Speaker 3: So how do I go from here? Do I talk

682
00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:19,360
Speaker 3: to her or no? And we do have an updates,

683
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,680
Speaker 3: but what's our answer. It's tricky because this isn't just

684
00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 3: like a you know, neurotypical mom who's taken money for

685
00:30:28,760 --> 00:30:32,120
Speaker 3: whatever reason. This is like someone who is seemingly like

686
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 3: severely like affected by polar disorder, and you know, like

687
00:30:36,080 --> 00:30:39,000
Speaker 3: it's not just she's stealing for fun. You know. I

688
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:43,160
Speaker 3: think it's a little bit trickier in terms of confrontation.

689
00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:44,800
Speaker 4: Like how you have to go about it, because obviously

690
00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:47,080
Speaker 4: it's still bad and there should be a solution to

691
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 4: it and she should be like having consequences. But I

692
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:51,760
Speaker 4: don't know if the solution or I don't know if

693
00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 4: you will reach the solution that you want by having

694
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:57,200
Speaker 4: conversation with her, like if she might need medication or

695
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,280
Speaker 4: you know, well yeah, but I guess I feel like

696
00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:01,840
Speaker 4: that would probably still start from a conversation. Sure, so

697
00:31:01,880 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 4: you can't just like slipper miss it's on the money. Yeah,

698
00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:06,480
Speaker 4: so I think trying to have a conversation as calmly

699
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:07,040
Speaker 4: as possible.

700
00:31:07,120 --> 00:31:10,040
Speaker 3: But there is an update, just a fair warning. This

701
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 3: is a pretty.

702
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 4: Uneventful and not very positive update. I first want to

703
00:31:14,040 --> 00:31:16,200
Speaker 4: thank all the people who gave such good advice to me.

704
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 4: I was so dumbfounded at the whole situation that I

705
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,640
Speaker 4: couldn't even fathom what to do, and your comments really

706
00:31:21,640 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 4: helped me formulate a plan about how to move forward

707
00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:26,640
Speaker 4: with my relationship with my mom. After reading all your comments,

708
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:28,640
Speaker 4: I decided that I needed to confront my mom in

709
00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:31,040
Speaker 4: some way, though I honestly didn't think it would ever

710
00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:33,840
Speaker 4: make her question her behavior or want to improve herself.

711
00:31:34,360 --> 00:31:36,960
Speaker 4: Yesterday morning, the morning after my dad caught my mom

712
00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 4: stealing from me, I was leaving early for a new

713
00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:42,120
Speaker 4: internship orientation and my mom said goodbye to me as

714
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:44,200
Speaker 4: I walked at the door, as if nothing had happened

715
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:46,280
Speaker 4: the night before. As I was walking out the door,

716
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 4: I turned to her and said, Dad told me what

717
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 4: he caught you doing last night, Just straight up.

718
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:52,240
Speaker 3: I know what you've been up to.

719
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:53,640
Speaker 1: She's like, he read it out on me.

720
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,840
Speaker 4: No, She said nothing to me, but gave me a

721
00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:59,400
Speaker 4: kind of mortified look. And I walked out the door

722
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 4: just like I got my eye on you piece out bye.

723
00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:05,560
Speaker 4: She's like, no, purposely stayed out until really late that

724
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 4: night and only went home after I knew she was

725
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,120
Speaker 4: in bed. I didn't hear it all from her that day,

726
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:13,160
Speaker 4: except a text message asking about how my job orientation

727
00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 4: went and saying I'm sorry I let you down.

728
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:17,320
Speaker 3: It will never happen again.

729
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 4: I replied to her text, telling her the orientation went

730
00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:22,680
Speaker 4: fine and that we would talk later. The night I

731
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 4: got home, I wrote her a letter about how much

732
00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:27,560
Speaker 4: she had violated my trust and how hurt and anxious

733
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,160
Speaker 4: I was about her stealing from me. I also told

734
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 4: her I loved her, but she clearly needs psychological help

735
00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:36,800
Speaker 4: and that her behavior has consequences. This letter was really

736
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 4: good for helping me sort out my feelings, but I

737
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:41,080
Speaker 4: decided to just talk to her face to face about it.

738
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,920
Speaker 4: I just had a gut feeling that it would be

739
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:46,720
Speaker 4: more therapeutic for me. This evening, I asked to talk

740
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:50,120
Speaker 4: to her in a private and I told her basically

741
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:52,239
Speaker 4: everything I wrote in the letter, how much she had

742
00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:55,240
Speaker 4: hurt me, how her actions affected my anxiety over money,

743
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:57,880
Speaker 4: and how her spending and stealing over the past two

744
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:02,080
Speaker 4: decades have been negatively impacted the entire family. I told

745
00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 4: her that she needed to get help. She didn't say much.

746
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:06,320
Speaker 3: She just cried.

747
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 4: She apologized for hurting me and admitted that she has

748
00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:12,480
Speaker 4: been stealing from me for months. She promised it would

749
00:33:12,800 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 4: never happen again. She couldn't give me a reason as

750
00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 4: to why she did it, and she didn't really respond

751
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:22,000
Speaker 4: to my request that she go seek better psychological help.

752
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 3: I don't really think that I got.

753
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:25,880
Speaker 4: Through to her on a lasting level, and I feel

754
00:33:25,880 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 4: like she was more upset that she got caught than

755
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 4: that she stole in the first place. I feel better

756
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:33,640
Speaker 4: that she now knows how I feel, but this put

757
00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:36,080
Speaker 4: a dent in our relationship that will probably never be

758
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 4: fully mended. She didn't offer to pay me back from

759
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 4: her own money, and when I suggested that she paid

760
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:43,840
Speaker 4: me back, she avoided agreeing to it. It is clear

761
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 4: to me that I will never see any of that

762
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:48,240
Speaker 4: money back, and I am honestly too tired to fight

763
00:33:48,320 --> 00:33:50,120
Speaker 4: about it with her. I don't want to ask my

764
00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:52,240
Speaker 4: dad for the money because he already does so much

765
00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:55,640
Speaker 4: for me and is under such tremendous stress taking care

766
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 4: of our family single handedly. I guess this whole thing

767
00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:00,120
Speaker 4: was never really about the money anyway.

768
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:04,400
Speaker 3: It was about the violation of trust. Trust you to do.

769
00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:07,760
Speaker 4: You know, what you can always trust us to have

770
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:10,400
Speaker 4: for you is full episodes of more stories just like

771
00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:13,360
Speaker 4: this one on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeart Radio, or your

772
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,839
Speaker 4: favorite podcasts app and search. Okay, story Time will never

773
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:20,440
Speaker 4: violate your trust. I promise never, never, ever, pinky promise.

774
00:34:20,680 --> 00:34:22,040
Speaker 4: There is a little bit more to the story. But

775
00:34:22,040 --> 00:34:23,040
Speaker 4: what do we think so far?

776
00:34:23,320 --> 00:34:27,160
Speaker 3: It's like it was a needed conversation. Yeah. Again, when

777
00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:31,279
Speaker 3: it's has to do with a literal medical condition or

778
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:35,200
Speaker 3: like a psychological condition, it's so hard to have like

779
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:39,000
Speaker 3: any kind of actual, I don't know, stuff come out

780
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 3: of that conversation, you know, any like resolution, Yeah, exactly,

781
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 3: because she can say whatever she wants or whatever she

782
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,479
Speaker 3: thinks she wants to hear, but she's still probably gonna

783
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:50,439
Speaker 3: have those same kind of urges to spend when she's

784
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:53,960
Speaker 3: having like her highs, right, Yeah, I think you need

785
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:55,799
Speaker 3: it to say it. Yeah, I definitely needed to say that.

786
00:34:55,920 --> 00:34:57,840
Speaker 3: But there is a little bit more to the story.

787
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:00,239
Speaker 4: So I almost feel like a failure in a push

788
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 4: over for not fighting harder to get the money back.

789
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 4: But I guess I just don't have the motivation to

790
00:35:05,040 --> 00:35:06,799
Speaker 4: have a huge fight with her and I will never

791
00:35:06,880 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 4: be able to approve how much was actually taken from

792
00:35:09,239 --> 00:35:12,359
Speaker 4: me over the months. One thing is for sure, I

793
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:15,480
Speaker 4: will never forget this. My money will always either be

794
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:17,319
Speaker 4: in the safe in my room which I changed the

795
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:20,640
Speaker 4: combination to just in case good, or in the bank.

796
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,000
Speaker 4: I will never loan money to her or trust her

797
00:35:23,040 --> 00:35:26,279
Speaker 4: around my money ever. Again, I'm not super happy with

798
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 4: how everything turned out, but I'm confident no damage she

799
00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 4: will ever do to her relationships or family will ever

800
00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:36,320
Speaker 4: make her reflect on her behavior. She is selfish and childish,

801
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 4: and you can't reason with someone like that. Thanks for

802
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 4: all the support. This subreddit will always be my favorite

803
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:43,880
Speaker 4: subreddit because the people here are.

804
00:35:43,880 --> 00:35:46,440
Speaker 3: Just so great. And that's the end of that story.

805
00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:48,880
Speaker 3: And then you have it. There, you have it. I

806
00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:50,040
Speaker 3: think you gotta do what we said.

807
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, And it looks like she is and that's that

808
00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:56,680
Speaker 4: is really unfortunate and not the ideal for your mom's behavior.

809
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 4: But it seems like she's in an okay head space

810
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:02,239
Speaker 4: about just being like, you know what, at the very

811
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 4: end of it, it's out of my control, so you

812
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:06,600
Speaker 4: kind of just have to do what you can.

813
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:08,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's seeing a story.

814
00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:10,920
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam your og host. Here.

815
00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:12,520
Speaker 2: We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's three

816
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:13,880
Speaker 2: minutes of ads from our sponsors.

817
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 3: I dated my sister's best friend. She didn't take it lightly.

818
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:21,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, she was lifting like four reps of four

819
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,160
Speaker 2: hundred pounds of seriousness on that.

820
00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:26,719
Speaker 3: I have been sleeping with Carmela for about a year now.

821
00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 3: We're both female, in our early thirties and worked similar schedules.

822
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 3: Carmela has been asking if we can spend more quality

823
00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:36,239
Speaker 3: time together, so we're dating without the title of girlfriend yet.

824
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Narsukibas and if you

825
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 3: want to spend your own stories, go to our slash

826
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:44,200
Speaker 3: Okay storytime separate it. So Carmela spends about three nights

827
00:36:44,239 --> 00:36:46,320
Speaker 3: a week in my apartment. We do all the cuddly,

828
00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 3: mushy stuff people in relationships tend to do. She makes

829
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:52,360
Speaker 3: me breakfast, I make her dinner. She's been buying me

830
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:55,880
Speaker 3: small presents, and we take turns paying for movies and dinner.

831
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:59,120
Speaker 3: Someone asked if she was my girlfriend, and she just nodded,

832
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:01,279
Speaker 3: So it feels it's very natural to be with her.

833
00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 3: She enchants me every day. I am pretty much in

834
00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 3: love with her, but would like to make it official

835
00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:09,319
Speaker 3: before I start writing her love ballads. Part of my

836
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:12,800
Speaker 3: hesitation to make it official is my sister Linda twenty

837
00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:15,279
Speaker 3: six female. She found out about our relationship when she

838
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:17,760
Speaker 3: popped in one morning to borrow a shirt. She doesn't

839
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,120
Speaker 3: have a key, so Carmela opened the door for her.

840
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:22,960
Speaker 3: It ended with Linda screaming at us, saying we broke

841
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:26,319
Speaker 3: our heart and storming out. Since then, Linda has been

842
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,759
Speaker 3: acting snob. She lives with my mom, who has some

843
00:37:28,800 --> 00:37:31,840
Speaker 3: health issues, so I hear about how Linda's sobbing herself

844
00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:34,719
Speaker 3: to sleep, but she keeps asking about Carmela. My mom

845
00:37:34,760 --> 00:37:37,920
Speaker 3: thinks it's getting really intense and has stopped asking us

846
00:37:37,960 --> 00:37:40,719
Speaker 3: to make up with Linda. Mom's over it. People in

847
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:43,920
Speaker 3: my family asked if I stole Carmela from her because

848
00:37:43,960 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 3: Linda acts like Carmela broke up with her. God accused

849
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 3: of using Linda to steal Carmela away by a few cousins.

850
00:37:50,600 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 3: When we explain what happened, they seemed surprised and shocked

851
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:57,279
Speaker 3: that Linda was never with Carmela. As far as I know,

852
00:37:57,560 --> 00:37:59,800
Speaker 3: Linda is straight, so it makes me a little confused.

853
00:37:59,840 --> 00:38:01,799
Speaker 3: Why she's furious Carmela is with me.

854
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:02,640
Speaker 1: She's not strange.

855
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 2: If you didn't even know she was that, See, this

856
00:38:04,719 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 2: could all just be solved now, just talk be like

857
00:38:07,360 --> 00:38:09,200
Speaker 2: I didn't even know you weren't straight.

858
00:38:09,280 --> 00:38:11,359
Speaker 1: How can I steal this girl from you? I didn't

859
00:38:11,400 --> 00:38:12,480
Speaker 1: even know you know?

860
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:15,640
Speaker 3: And Linda's gonna be like shit have been obvious?

861
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:19,640
Speaker 1: Well then, but also it's like that's also not even.

862
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:20,600
Speaker 3: No, it's not a thing.

863
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 2: I'm not stealing her from anybody, because she's a human

864
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:25,239
Speaker 2: being exactly she wants to be.

865
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:28,960
Speaker 3: I don't believe we're doing anything wrong. I find Carmela schmixy,

866
00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 3: smart and fun. I respect her as a person, which

867
00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 3: is more than Linda can say and thinks she's allowed

868
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:37,440
Speaker 3: to make her own spicy related choices. This isn't fifth grade.

869
00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:40,240
Speaker 3: You don't get a throw a fit because your friend

870
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:42,920
Speaker 3: kissed your sibling. I am willing to cut my sister

871
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:45,400
Speaker 3: out of my life if Carmela needs me to. I

872
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:47,840
Speaker 3: plan to ask her to be my girlfriend officially this Sunday,

873
00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:50,720
Speaker 3: because I love her very much and enjoy every second

874
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:52,799
Speaker 3: together with her. I just am not sure why Linda

875
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:55,040
Speaker 3: is going crazy like this and if I should do

876
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:57,319
Speaker 3: something about it, like ill a police report, I could

877
00:38:57,440 --> 00:38:59,879
Speaker 3: use some thoughts and clarity, So help me read.

878
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 1: All right, I get the police report will be delved into.

879
00:39:04,719 --> 00:39:07,760
Speaker 3: Scon you're gonna understand why the police report is relevant,

880
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:08,839
Speaker 3: but like, just.

881
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:13,600
Speaker 1: Talk first, Yeah, have a conversation on.

882
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:16,360
Speaker 3: One queer sister to another queer sister.

883
00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:22,400
Speaker 1: And just be cool. Like even if she's like you,

884
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:25,879
Speaker 1: just gotta be like, hey, I'm not gonna do that. Edit.

885
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:28,680
Speaker 3: If she was just upset, we would not be trying

886
00:39:28,719 --> 00:39:30,640
Speaker 3: to pull away. I guess I am not writing this

887
00:39:30,719 --> 00:39:32,640
Speaker 3: out the way it should be. Carmela has been getting

888
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 3: up to thirty calls a day from her, plus tons

889
00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:39,080
Speaker 3: of text messages demanding to know why she chouts me,

890
00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:42,520
Speaker 3: et cetera. I have gotten calls where she just mindlessly

891
00:39:42,680 --> 00:39:46,480
Speaker 3: screams into my ear or texts me nasty things. I

892
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:50,520
Speaker 3: think I understand. Most people believe I should have told her,

893
00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:52,840
Speaker 3: but Linda and I are not that close. Carmela and

894
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:54,840
Speaker 3: I both made the choice to keep it to ourselves

895
00:39:54,960 --> 00:39:57,919
Speaker 3: until the time we decided if Slash went to date.

896
00:39:58,080 --> 00:40:00,439
Speaker 3: This is just how we were raised and worked the best.

897
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:03,120
Speaker 3: In general, I don't believe family is entitled to know

898
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:05,960
Speaker 3: who you are sleeping with. Carmela and I have decided

899
00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:08,720
Speaker 3: to take some steps to talk to Linda. I've decided

900
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 3: I would go over and talk with Mom first. I

901
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,000
Speaker 3: told her what I was thinking, and we decided Linda

902
00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:15,799
Speaker 3: needed to be spoken with. My mom told Linda she

903
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:18,120
Speaker 3: needed to come downstairs and talk with me or she

904
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:21,720
Speaker 3: would need to move out. Give her that ultimedum. Linda

905
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:24,480
Speaker 3: has been crying and screaming for the last few days,

906
00:40:24,560 --> 00:40:27,799
Speaker 3: and it makes my mom stress so much worse. So

907
00:40:28,040 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 3: Linda came down and began shouting at me. The moment

908
00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 3: she saw me, my mom told her, shout up it listen.

909
00:40:33,719 --> 00:40:37,120
Speaker 3: Surprisingly she did. I sat down with her mom listening

910
00:40:37,480 --> 00:40:39,719
Speaker 3: way awkward. I pretty much told her that I didn't

911
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:42,359
Speaker 3: plan to tell anyone about Carmela and I until we

912
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:45,000
Speaker 3: were officially together longer. It was never meant to be

913
00:40:45,040 --> 00:40:46,919
Speaker 3: a disc towards her. She was just not someone who

914
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:49,799
Speaker 3: needed to know about who I slept with. Carmela could

915
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:52,120
Speaker 3: have said at any time she wanted Linda to know,

916
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:54,479
Speaker 3: but we both as a unit, decided it was best

917
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:56,600
Speaker 3: to just enjoy one another. I said that I had

918
00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:58,759
Speaker 3: a lot of relationships no one knew about because I

919
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 3: kept them to myself until six months of serious dating.

920
00:41:02,560 --> 00:41:08,120
Speaker 3: That's a long time. I can't even go one conversation.

921
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 1: Without telling us about it.

922
00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:10,600
Speaker 3: Everyone in my life.

923
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:11,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know.

924
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:13,880
Speaker 2: I feel like I could relate to six months. I

925
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:16,080
Speaker 2: don't know about six months, but I just mean I

926
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:17,240
Speaker 2: can relate to like waiting.

927
00:41:17,719 --> 00:41:20,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was then that I believed it was worth

928
00:41:20,400 --> 00:41:23,320
Speaker 3: bringing someone home to the family. Linda said it was different.

929
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:26,120
Speaker 3: Carmela was our best friend and should have said something.

930
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:28,799
Speaker 3: I asked her why she felt she needed to know.

931
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 3: Why was it important she knew who Carmela was having

932
00:41:31,640 --> 00:41:34,440
Speaker 3: spicy sleep with. If Carmela wanted to keep it private,

933
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:37,239
Speaker 3: then why would Linda be offended by that? Linda said

934
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:39,560
Speaker 3: I was her sister and should have said something. My

935
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 3: mom chose to butt in at this point and tell

936
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:43,760
Speaker 3: Linda that she had to make a choice. She could

937
00:41:43,760 --> 00:41:47,560
Speaker 3: either keep screaming, move out, and become bitter, or she

938
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 3: could get some therapy and deal with her issues.

939
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:50,840
Speaker 1: W mom.

940
00:41:51,080 --> 00:41:53,359
Speaker 3: Mom said she was tired of hearing about this and

941
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 3: we needed to work it out. But she did not

942
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:58,120
Speaker 3: raise people who got mad about each other's spicy sleep lives.

943
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:00,600
Speaker 3: Mom left at this point to take her medicare, and

944
00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:03,160
Speaker 3: I told Linda I needed to be clear on some stuff.

945
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:05,480
Speaker 3: Carmela and I are now initially together.

946
00:42:06,040 --> 00:42:09,520
Speaker 2: Okay, so, and everything's exactly the same, okay, cool.

947
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 3: Carmela doesn't want to see her until this is worked out.

948
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,520
Speaker 3: I was tired of the harmful calls. I had them

949
00:42:14,600 --> 00:42:17,920
Speaker 3: saved in case Linda escalated. I needed her to be

950
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,759
Speaker 3: a sister, not a bitter ex. Then I asked if

951
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:24,000
Speaker 3: she had feelings for Carmela. Linda broke down, crying and

952
00:42:24,040 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 3: said she didn't understand why Carmela would choose me over her.

953
00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:30,880
Speaker 3: Apparently she does have feelings and thinks I stole her

954
00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:34,080
Speaker 3: best friend and crushed from her. I said she was

955
00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:37,759
Speaker 3: acting childish. If Carmela, who did tell Linda she was by,

956
00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:40,920
Speaker 3: didn't mention something in three years, how could Linda think

957
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,799
Speaker 3: I stole her. I didn't steal anyone. Weft we got

958
00:42:43,840 --> 00:42:46,200
Speaker 3: on and we would be together for as long as

959
00:42:46,239 --> 00:42:48,840
Speaker 3: we decided. I told Linda I did not intend to

960
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:51,279
Speaker 3: tell her how my relationship with Carmela was going, only

961
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 3: that she would know if we planned to get engaged

962
00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:55,600
Speaker 3: or married. But she had shown she could not be

963
00:42:55,680 --> 00:42:58,800
Speaker 3: trusted with information like this because she liked Carmela. Linda

964
00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:00,960
Speaker 3: begged me to break up with her, oh, and I

965
00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:04,440
Speaker 3: said no. I would choose Carmela because I loved her

966
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:07,320
Speaker 3: and felt Linda was being aggressive with her calls and actions.

967
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:08,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is crazy.

968
00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:11,239
Speaker 3: Linda showed up at my apartment later that night and

969
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:13,839
Speaker 3: Carmela spoke with her. I was in the same room,

970
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:16,560
Speaker 3: but I really didn't speak that much. Carmela explained she

971
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:19,720
Speaker 3: was ending the friendship and no longer wanted to speak

972
00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:22,200
Speaker 3: with Linda. She did not feel comfortable with someone feeling

973
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:25,440
Speaker 3: slighted because spicy sleep is a private thing and I

974
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:28,560
Speaker 3: never intended to tell you about Ope, She told Carmela

975
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:30,320
Speaker 3: she has never really been open about the people she

976
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:33,440
Speaker 3: slept with with anyone, even her own people. I do

977
00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 3: think that is kind of like a thing that Carmela's

978
00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 3: and Dope should kind of look into of like why

979
00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 3: they don't want to tell anyone. Yeah, like I don't know. Obviously,

980
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,800
Speaker 3: you have a right to tell to disclose that information

981
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 3: with whoever you choose, but it seems like she's like,

982
00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 3: I don't disclose up with anyone.

983
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,600
Speaker 2: I think it's the principle of like when you have

984
00:43:53,040 --> 00:43:56,160
Speaker 2: like in the context of like a dream, not like

985
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:57,680
Speaker 2: a like a I went to sleep and I had

986
00:43:57,719 --> 00:43:58,080
Speaker 2: a dream.

987
00:43:58,080 --> 00:43:59,399
Speaker 1: But it's like this is like my goal.

988
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:02,120
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, this desire, Yeah, and keep keep it

989
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:04,040
Speaker 2: close to you, keep it close to the chest until

990
00:44:04,080 --> 00:44:06,879
Speaker 2: it's like fully developed and you go, Okay, some things

991
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:08,040
Speaker 2: are going on here.

992
00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:10,680
Speaker 3: No, yeah, I mean I totally understand waiting until it

993
00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 3: seems like it's more you know, real and everything. But

994
00:44:14,080 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 3: like six months is a long time.

995
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:20,160
Speaker 2: That I mean, it's not really none of the context

996
00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:23,080
Speaker 2: of a relationship, in the context of like a long

997
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:27,319
Speaker 2: term relationship that's like one eightieth of what like we

998
00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:29,200
Speaker 2: have been married for forty years.

999
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:32,200
Speaker 3: Like maybe we just have different relationship timelines right now.

1000
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:35,080
Speaker 3: The only people who she talked to about Spice to

1001
00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:37,959
Speaker 3: Sleep was though she slept with. Even then, she never

1002
00:44:38,040 --> 00:44:40,719
Speaker 3: mentioned a past partner to someone she did not think.

1003
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:43,560
Speaker 3: She owed Linda a play by play. Our relationship is

1004
00:44:43,560 --> 00:44:46,800
Speaker 3: not spicy related. It was emotional. You were my best friend.

1005
00:44:46,880 --> 00:44:49,560
Speaker 3: But even my own family doesn't know about nar. We

1006
00:44:49,640 --> 00:44:51,400
Speaker 3: will talk about it to them when it gets serious.

1007
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:53,440
Speaker 3: But you really showed me what you are truly like

1008
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:56,000
Speaker 3: Linda was crying the whole time and said we deserved

1009
00:44:56,040 --> 00:44:58,680
Speaker 3: one another. I agreed, as I love Carmela very much.

1010
00:44:58,719 --> 00:45:01,280
Speaker 3: Linda told me she hated she planned to tell everyone

1011
00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:03,240
Speaker 3: about us. I told her she should if she wanted,

1012
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 3: but that it wouldn't make her happier. We were going

1013
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:07,919
Speaker 3: to be together. Even if we broke up. Carmela would

1014
00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:10,080
Speaker 3: not be with her. She had the choice to either

1015
00:45:10,160 --> 00:45:12,520
Speaker 3: accept she would never be involved in our Spicy sleep

1016
00:45:12,560 --> 00:45:14,960
Speaker 3: Life in the future or the present. She needed to

1017
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 3: either respect it or get out of our lives until

1018
00:45:17,680 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 3: she could. She said I was a witch and left.

1019
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:22,239
Speaker 3: So not sure how it will turn out, but that

1020
00:45:22,400 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 3: is the update. Carmela and I are saddened by what happened,

1021
00:45:25,600 --> 00:45:28,600
Speaker 3: hold firm to the notion we owe no one else

1022
00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:31,600
Speaker 3: are Spicy sleep Life and comments. Opie says, if she

1023
00:45:31,640 --> 00:45:33,480
Speaker 3: didn't tell me about her crush, then she felt it

1024
00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:35,640
Speaker 3: was not of my business. It goes both ways. My

1025
00:45:35,760 --> 00:45:38,480
Speaker 3: crush my Spicy sleep life, and my partner is none

1026
00:45:38,560 --> 00:45:41,360
Speaker 3: of her business. I do think a crush and a

1027
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:45,040
Speaker 3: relationship are different, though, comment one, well, this is one

1028
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:47,720
Speaker 3: aft up situation. You all probably could have handled it better,

1029
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:48,799
Speaker 3: but it is what it is.

1030
00:45:49,960 --> 00:45:52,200
Speaker 2: I love that comment, says that they could have done

1031
00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 2: things better, refuses to elaborate, leaves.

1032
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:58,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, gotta fix that. Yeah, I think, well, I think

1033
00:45:58,239 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 3: what they're saying is, like, you guys probably could have

1034
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 3: talked to Carmela's best friend about the relationship with your like,

1035
00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:06,960
Speaker 3: you know, with her sister.

1036
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:11,920
Speaker 2: I don't. I guess, well, okay, I think they did, so,

1037
00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:13,240
Speaker 2: I guess we're best friends.

1038
00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:17,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, like carl she's said, I mean everyone, according to

1039
00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 3: the story, Carmela and Linda were best friends. Slyly Toe says,

1040
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 3: I'm also really confused why everyone is so fixated on

1041
00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:25,160
Speaker 3: the spicy sleep part of it when it's quite clear

1042
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:27,160
Speaker 3: there are emotions involved in this. There is a love

1043
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 3: and a relationship involved in this. I agree. I feel

1044
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:31,480
Speaker 3: like they keep emphasizing no one has a right to

1045
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:34,239
Speaker 3: know any of our spicy sleep information. It's like, well that,

1046
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 3: I don't think that's really what Linda is hung up on.

1047
00:46:37,120 --> 00:46:38,520
Speaker 3: I think she's hung up on the fact that you

1048
00:46:38,560 --> 00:46:40,439
Speaker 3: guys kept like a relationship secret from her.

1049
00:46:40,760 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, but again, none of your business.

1050
00:46:43,239 --> 00:46:45,879
Speaker 3: I mean again, like, Linda is definitely in the wrong here.

1051
00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:46,640
Speaker 3: But I think that.

1052
00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:49,320
Speaker 1: If if Linda was an ex.

1053
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:53,440
Speaker 2: If Linda was an ex, your business partially your business

1054
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:56,880
Speaker 2: should be a discussion before anything happened to you, say hey, sister,

1055
00:46:57,280 --> 00:46:58,560
Speaker 2: I be dating your ex?

1056
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:00,360
Speaker 1: Is that going to ruin your life?

1057
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:02,640
Speaker 3: But they're more comments. Comment two says, I'm just sort

1058
00:47:02,640 --> 00:47:05,160
Speaker 3: of amazed by your complete lack of empathy towards your sister.

1059
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:07,399
Speaker 3: I would say, try to see where she's coming from,

1060
00:47:07,480 --> 00:47:09,680
Speaker 3: but you don't seem to have any interest in doing so.

1061
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 3: Common three says have you ever had thirty calls a

1062
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:13,800
Speaker 3: day screaming tamp terms on your phone for both you

1063
00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:16,680
Speaker 3: and your girlfriend and petty slanders spread around to your

1064
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:17,319
Speaker 3: family about you?

1065
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:17,600
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1066
00:47:18,040 --> 00:47:21,200
Speaker 2: In a reply to the previous comment, which I was like, what, buddy,

1067
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:22,879
Speaker 2: did you not read the whole thing?

1068
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:26,040
Speaker 3: The thing is that if we had not learned about

1069
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:30,120
Speaker 3: Linda harassing everyone in this story, I would like kind

1070
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:31,920
Speaker 3: of agree, I'd be like, yeah, I mean, you didn't

1071
00:47:31,920 --> 00:47:34,360
Speaker 3: tell her about your relationship with her best friend. But

1072
00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:37,040
Speaker 3: because we have all of the harassment and stuff, it's

1073
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:40,400
Speaker 3: pretty clear that there is maybe not the best relationship

1074
00:47:40,440 --> 00:47:42,920
Speaker 3: going into this story with Linda and Ope. She was

1075
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,439
Speaker 3: pestering the crap out of both of them. Empathy drives

1076
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:48,480
Speaker 3: up when people start talking crap about you and pestering

1077
00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:51,000
Speaker 3: you relentlessly. It'd be one thing if she was merely

1078
00:47:51,080 --> 00:47:53,359
Speaker 3: hurt or upset, but she was actively effing with op

1079
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:56,640
Speaker 3: Her response is rational and reasonable for dealing with this

1080
00:47:56,719 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 3: behavior from anyone over the age of eleven. And that

1081
00:47:59,040 --> 00:48:00,719
Speaker 3: is the end of that story.

1082
00:48:00,800 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 1: Wow.

1083
00:48:01,280 --> 00:48:05,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I think I would have a poll of, uh,

1084
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:08,439
Speaker 3: would you be I don't know, like hurt if you're

1085
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:10,480
Speaker 3: something along the list of like, how would you feel

1086
00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:13,880
Speaker 3: if your best friend kept the information they were secretly

1087
00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:14,800
Speaker 3: dating or something from me?

1088
00:48:14,880 --> 00:48:17,239
Speaker 1: Yeah? And how would you feel if I told you that?

1089
00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:19,520
Speaker 1: By the way, you can listen.

1090
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:23,440
Speaker 2: To full episodes with stories like this one on Spotify,

1091
00:48:23,760 --> 00:48:27,360
Speaker 2: on iHeartRadio, on Apple podcasts wherever you listen to podcasts,

1092
00:48:27,360 --> 00:48:30,239
Speaker 2: just search Okay story time and then you can listen

1093
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:34,279
Speaker 2: to what is now because it's Monday. Yeah, fifty three

1094
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,040
Speaker 2: consecutive days week stories.

1095
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,200
Speaker 3: Zooey, Mama's what they say.

1096
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:39,640
Speaker 1: Hmm.

1097
00:48:41,320 --> 00:48:45,200
Speaker 2: My sister is furious that I'm proposing to my boyfriend

1098
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:47,520
Speaker 2: without considering her feelings.

1099
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe you should have done it first, sister, So

1100
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 3: I twenty six female am Planning to propose to my

1101
00:48:54,120 --> 00:48:55,399
Speaker 3: boyfriend twenty seven male.

1102
00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:57,480
Speaker 2: We've been dating for four years now and he's the

1103
00:48:57,520 --> 00:48:59,200
Speaker 2: most important person in my life.

1104
00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:00,320
Speaker 1: You've discussed me marriage.

1105
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 2: He was always very eager to propose and has been

1106
00:49:02,760 --> 00:49:05,360
Speaker 2: saving money for some time. I think he's an artist

1107
00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:08,080
Speaker 2: and doesn't really make that much, but he's way too

1108
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:09,920
Speaker 2: proud to let me pitch in. By the way, this

1109
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,840
Speaker 2: comes from user throw Away a Ring nine four seven,

1110
00:49:12,880 --> 00:49:14,279
Speaker 2: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

1111
00:49:14,280 --> 00:49:17,080
Speaker 2: to the r slash Okay storytime suburn it so well.

1112
00:49:17,160 --> 00:49:20,520
Speaker 2: Around last month, his mom had a surgery. I won't

1113
00:49:20,520 --> 00:49:23,080
Speaker 2: go into details, but it cost his parents quite a lot.

1114
00:49:23,160 --> 00:49:25,800
Speaker 2: She doesn't have insurance. I don't know why. He transferred

1115
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:28,040
Speaker 2: them money from his own savings as well, but didn't

1116
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:29,879
Speaker 2: tell me that. I even offered to help. That day,

1117
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 2: I found him crying in our room. He told me

1118
00:49:32,120 --> 00:49:34,640
Speaker 2: all of this and kept on apologizing that the money

1119
00:49:34,640 --> 00:49:36,719
Speaker 2: he was saving for the ring had to go into

1120
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:39,040
Speaker 2: helping his mom, and now he can't propose on our

1121
00:49:39,080 --> 00:49:42,359
Speaker 2: anniversary like he was planning to. It was so heartbreaking

1122
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:44,280
Speaker 2: for me to see him like that. To be honest,

1123
00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:46,680
Speaker 2: I don't give a dang about that. Ring. I want

1124
00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:48,640
Speaker 2: to marry this guy, and I'd have done that in

1125
00:49:48,680 --> 00:49:50,960
Speaker 2: a courthouse if he'd agree. I told him all of that,

1126
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 2: but for him, things like these are important. I actually

1127
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:57,240
Speaker 2: kind of yelled at him as well for worrying about

1128
00:49:57,280 --> 00:49:58,120
Speaker 2: the wrong reason.

1129
00:49:58,280 --> 00:49:58,560
Speaker 1: Hello.

1130
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:00,920
Speaker 2: He told me to give him some time, as he

1131
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:03,640
Speaker 2: wants to get me the best he can. Well, I've

1132
00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:06,160
Speaker 2: decided to propose on our anniversary.

1133
00:50:06,280 --> 00:50:07,440
Speaker 1: I'm doing it on a beach.

1134
00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:09,719
Speaker 2: We used to visit a lot of kids back in

1135
00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:11,919
Speaker 2: our hometown, and I'm picking up the ring next week.

1136
00:50:11,960 --> 00:50:15,120
Speaker 2: Here comes my sister, twenty eight female. She's had multiple

1137
00:50:15,120 --> 00:50:17,759
Speaker 2: failed relationships and still lives with our parents. She saw

1138
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 2: me looking at a ring photo when she was visiting

1139
00:50:20,080 --> 00:50:22,240
Speaker 2: me this Christmas, so I told her I was planning

1140
00:50:22,239 --> 00:50:24,640
Speaker 2: to propose at the beach. She went silent for a

1141
00:50:24,680 --> 00:50:26,839
Speaker 2: minute and asked me if I was kidding her.

1142
00:50:27,040 --> 00:50:32,040
Speaker 3: Stop but he's proposing. Yeah, cute, I miss that. That's

1143
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:32,760
Speaker 3: really cute.

1144
00:50:32,800 --> 00:50:36,200
Speaker 2: Apparently she caught her boyfriend of two years with someone

1145
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:38,880
Speaker 2: else on that same beach and hates that place.

1146
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:39,160
Speaker 1: Now.

1147
00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:42,080
Speaker 2: I wasn't aware of this. I also wasn't aware that

1148
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:43,799
Speaker 2: it was your sister who's getting.

1149
00:50:43,520 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 3: There yeah, why does that matter? I'm sorry. Does she

1150
00:50:46,120 --> 00:50:48,040
Speaker 3: have claim over every beach now?

1151
00:50:48,239 --> 00:50:48,479
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1152
00:50:48,680 --> 00:50:51,360
Speaker 3: Think? Oh no, sorry, you can't. You can't get married

1153
00:50:51,400 --> 00:50:54,520
Speaker 3: in the church because one time I went to church

1154
00:50:54,800 --> 00:50:57,800
Speaker 3: and it wasn't fun. It was really boring.

1155
00:50:58,080 --> 00:51:01,120
Speaker 2: This breakup she had was in September, and back then

1156
00:51:01,160 --> 00:51:03,719
Speaker 2: she told me he was cheating and she left him,

1157
00:51:03,840 --> 00:51:06,479
Speaker 2: And now she wants me to cancel this whole thing

1158
00:51:06,600 --> 00:51:09,640
Speaker 2: and do it somewhere else. I admit, when her relationship ended,

1159
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:11,799
Speaker 2: she did take it pretty hard. We all liked him

1160
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 2: and my sister was convinced he was the one, so

1161
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:16,560
Speaker 2: the breakup was really bad for her. Yes, it sucks

1162
00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 2: what happened to her, but I don't know why that

1163
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:21,840
Speaker 2: should affect my plans. Me and my boyfriend visit that

1164
00:51:21,920 --> 00:51:24,520
Speaker 2: place every time we're there, and it holds some importance

1165
00:51:24,560 --> 00:51:27,000
Speaker 2: for both of us. She's now calling me selfish and

1166
00:51:27,040 --> 00:51:29,719
Speaker 2: saying I only want to hurt her by reminding her

1167
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:32,719
Speaker 2: of that trauma. She then proceeds to talk about my

1168
00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:35,840
Speaker 2: boyfriend and how he can't propose and should be ashamed.

1169
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:38,200
Speaker 2: I shut that down quickly and told her to drop

1170
00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:40,360
Speaker 2: that topic. The rest of the day, she was moody

1171
00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:43,440
Speaker 2: and when she left, she was crying and called me heartless.

1172
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:47,200
Speaker 2: She's now texting me and saying getting engaged isn't important enough,

1173
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:50,480
Speaker 2: and I need to change the destination. I need advice

1174
00:51:50,560 --> 00:51:52,759
Speaker 2: on how to deal with her. Am I really in

1175
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:54,960
Speaker 2: the wrong here? All I know is I'm not changing

1176
00:51:54,960 --> 00:51:58,000
Speaker 2: the location. Whether I'm wrong or not, I'm kind of guilty,

1177
00:51:58,040 --> 00:52:00,760
Speaker 2: but that's just because we've been close we were kids,

1178
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:02,719
Speaker 2: and I don't really want to hurt her. Should I

1179
00:52:02,760 --> 00:52:05,600
Speaker 2: comfort her or something? Or is she being unreasonable? Also,

1180
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:07,880
Speaker 2: she lives with our parents and we're close too, so

1181
00:52:07,960 --> 00:52:09,720
Speaker 2: cutting her off isn't an option.

1182
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:10,640
Speaker 1: There's an edit.

1183
00:52:10,719 --> 00:52:13,360
Speaker 2: As some have mentioned in the comments that this proposal

1184
00:52:13,440 --> 00:52:16,560
Speaker 2: might be emasculating to my boyfriend. I know him, and

1185
00:52:16,600 --> 00:52:19,440
Speaker 2: if it was actually something i'd be quote taking away

1186
00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:22,560
Speaker 2: from him, I'd obviously never do it. We wanted to

1187
00:52:22,560 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 2: be engaged on our five year anniversary, and I think

1188
00:52:25,239 --> 00:52:28,080
Speaker 2: that's what he was guilty about, plus some stress about

1189
00:52:28,120 --> 00:52:30,239
Speaker 2: his mom's health. Thanks for the concern, but I know

1190
00:52:30,360 --> 00:52:33,279
Speaker 2: he'll love it. In another edit, thank you for the response.

1191
00:52:33,440 --> 00:52:35,719
Speaker 2: But I've seen some comments accusing my boyfriend and his

1192
00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:38,120
Speaker 2: parents of being immature and selfish.

1193
00:52:38,280 --> 00:52:44,000
Speaker 3: What your boyfriend's mom having a medical surgery is selfish?

1194
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:46,160
Speaker 1: Yeah? How dare you have an ailment?

1195
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:48,839
Speaker 3: Okay? Okay, yeah, okay.

1196
00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 2: So let's see something that is how Ope he addresses

1197
00:52:51,520 --> 00:52:55,800
Speaker 2: these charlatans. This is completely false. Be kind here, please.

1198
00:52:55,880 --> 00:52:59,000
Speaker 2: His parents are lovely people. Yes, they're struggling financially, and

1199
00:52:59,040 --> 00:53:01,480
Speaker 2: my boyfriend decided to help his parent. I would have

1200
00:53:01,520 --> 00:53:03,719
Speaker 2: been mad if my boyfriend decided to spend his money

1201
00:53:03,760 --> 00:53:05,720
Speaker 2: on a ring instead of helping his mom.

1202
00:53:05,880 --> 00:53:07,040
Speaker 1: And about the insurance thing.

1203
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:10,040
Speaker 2: I only know half of the story, and it's not

1204
00:53:10,160 --> 00:53:12,680
Speaker 2: because his parents are immature. I'll be talking to him

1205
00:53:12,719 --> 00:53:15,400
Speaker 2: about this later on. And he didn't spend all his savings.

1206
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:17,480
Speaker 2: His actual savings are separate from the money he was

1207
00:53:17,520 --> 00:53:18,239
Speaker 2: saving for the ring.

1208
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:19,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sure he doesn't want to spend all of

1209
00:53:19,920 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 3: his savings on a ring in general, but doubt he.

1210
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:24,440
Speaker 3: You know, you don't want to go through all of

1211
00:53:24,440 --> 00:53:28,200
Speaker 3: your savings to buy a ring. There are many other

1212
00:53:28,239 --> 00:53:30,920
Speaker 3: important things to do when you're you know, getting this

1213
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:33,279
Speaker 3: this is true, like about to get married.

1214
00:53:33,040 --> 00:53:35,120
Speaker 1: Son, This is true by appliances.

1215
00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:37,960
Speaker 3: If you're breaking the bank to get a ring right

1216
00:53:38,000 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 3: before you get married, maybe you guys are not, you know,

1217
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 3: ready to get married.

1218
00:53:42,000 --> 00:53:44,920
Speaker 1: Okay, another edit, y'all, I'm proposing tomorrow.

1219
00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:46,719
Speaker 2: I did talk to his mom about it, just to

1220
00:53:46,719 --> 00:53:49,720
Speaker 2: make sure I'm doing the righting by proposing, and she agrees.

1221
00:53:49,800 --> 00:53:50,520
Speaker 1: Wish me luck.

1222
00:53:50,719 --> 00:53:54,319
Speaker 2: Update After that incident, my sister called me two days

1223
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:58,319
Speaker 2: later asking if i'd finally realized how insensitive I've been

1224
00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:00,760
Speaker 2: to her, and said she wants me to apologize.

1225
00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:01,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.

1226
00:54:01,920 --> 00:54:04,359
Speaker 2: I told her, yes, she's my family and I love her,

1227
00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:08,280
Speaker 2: but she can't expect everyone to work according to her feelings.

1228
00:54:08,360 --> 00:54:10,520
Speaker 2: I didn't tell her if I was still going ahead

1229
00:54:10,520 --> 00:54:12,919
Speaker 2: with the plan because honestly, I was afraid she would

1230
00:54:12,920 --> 00:54:16,120
Speaker 2: try to ruin it or something. Probably a good instinct there, opie.

1231
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:19,239
Speaker 2: I hung up and refused to answer. When she called back,

1232
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:22,360
Speaker 2: I took the advice and refused to share any details

1233
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:25,399
Speaker 2: with my parents or her. They called the same day

1234
00:54:25,560 --> 00:54:28,000
Speaker 2: asking me to care for my sister's feelings as well.

1235
00:54:28,120 --> 00:54:31,120
Speaker 2: I wasn't expecting much from my parents anyway. They just

1236
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:34,240
Speaker 2: want us at peace and don't really care. Now onto

1237
00:54:34,280 --> 00:54:36,840
Speaker 2: the proposal, we were visiting a friend in our hometown

1238
00:54:36,920 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 2: who just had a baby and stayed there overnight. We

1239
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:43,080
Speaker 2: went to the beach and well, I propose, it went

1240
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:45,719
Speaker 2: exactly how I wanted it to be.

1241
00:54:46,280 --> 00:54:47,400
Speaker 1: We were walking.

1242
00:54:48,239 --> 00:54:52,360
Speaker 2: I then got on one knees and started my speech

1243
00:54:52,719 --> 00:54:56,400
Speaker 2: about how I'm in love and stuff.

1244
00:54:56,520 --> 00:54:57,120
Speaker 1: I kid you not.

1245
00:54:57,239 --> 00:54:59,799
Speaker 2: I wasn't even thirty seconds in when he hugged me

1246
00:55:00,120 --> 00:55:01,080
Speaker 2: and got emotional.

1247
00:55:01,200 --> 00:55:05,640
Speaker 1: It was so be beautiful. I couldn't stop smiling.

1248
00:55:05,960 --> 00:55:08,120
Speaker 2: He was so happy with the ring that I selected,

1249
00:55:08,239 --> 00:55:10,920
Speaker 2: and we said some sweet words and got all emotional.

1250
00:55:11,239 --> 00:55:12,080
Speaker 1: It was perfect.

1251
00:55:12,200 --> 00:55:14,440
Speaker 2: He also said how he loved that it happened at

1252
00:55:14,480 --> 00:55:17,400
Speaker 2: the beach, So yes, my sister can go screw yourself.

1253
00:55:17,480 --> 00:55:19,960
Speaker 2: And wouldn't it have been hilarious if he was like,

1254
00:55:20,040 --> 00:55:22,279
Speaker 2: I love that you chose this beach where your sister

1255
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:23,160
Speaker 2: got broken up at.

1256
00:55:23,280 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 3: Okay, this is my favorite beach. One time I was

1257
00:55:25,719 --> 00:55:26,200
Speaker 3: here and your.

1258
00:55:26,160 --> 00:55:28,719
Speaker 2: Sister got broken up, and I feel like I feel

1259
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:32,640
Speaker 2: like us getting you know, engaged here like really resets the.

1260
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:35,480
Speaker 3: Energy on exactly. It's kind of like saging the beach.

1261
00:55:35,560 --> 00:55:39,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've saved the beach with our proposal. We've saved

1262
00:55:39,280 --> 00:55:39,760
Speaker 1: the beach.

1263
00:55:40,280 --> 00:55:43,759
Speaker 2: We then went out to dinner and he couldn't stop smiling.

1264
00:55:44,080 --> 00:55:47,160
Speaker 1: He even told the Wagers, my girlfriend just proposed to me.

1265
00:55:47,680 --> 00:55:48,640
Speaker 1: I'm engaged.

1266
00:55:48,880 --> 00:55:52,200
Speaker 2: So yeah, whatever doubt I had about him not liking

1267
00:55:52,320 --> 00:55:54,040
Speaker 2: being proposed vanished.

1268
00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:55,000
Speaker 1: We had a great night.

1269
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:57,120
Speaker 2: Later, when we were about to go to sleep, I

1270
00:55:57,280 --> 00:56:00,520
Speaker 2: did ask him if he really was okay with me

1271
00:56:00,640 --> 00:56:03,319
Speaker 2: proposing because of how upset he was about the ring.

1272
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:05,000
Speaker 2: He told me he was upset because he felt like

1273
00:56:05,080 --> 00:56:07,239
Speaker 2: he was letting me down by not getting a ring

1274
00:56:07,360 --> 00:56:10,160
Speaker 2: and instead helping his mom. She's doing good, by the way,

1275
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:13,160
Speaker 2: and he still says he wants a ring on my finger.

1276
00:56:13,280 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 2: Soon we talked stuff out and we're good. I couldn't

1277
00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:19,120
Speaker 2: have asked for a better day now. The original plan

1278
00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:21,560
Speaker 2: was to go visit my parents after we were done

1279
00:56:21,640 --> 00:56:24,000
Speaker 2: visiting our friends, but I wasn't sure because of the

1280
00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:26,320
Speaker 2: whole thing going on with my sister. So I called

1281
00:56:26,320 --> 00:56:29,880
Speaker 2: my parents and told them I'm engaged. They did congratulate us,

1282
00:56:29,920 --> 00:56:33,280
Speaker 2: but we're not happy because I haven't been answering their calls.

1283
00:56:33,520 --> 00:56:35,400
Speaker 2: I asked them if those were calls to make me

1284
00:56:35,480 --> 00:56:38,400
Speaker 2: change my mind about the proposal, and they said yes.

1285
00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:41,800
Speaker 1: I told them, obviously that wasn't happening.

1286
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:45,480
Speaker 2: What they're like, you know, we're all happy that you're engaged,

1287
00:56:45,640 --> 00:56:47,560
Speaker 2: except why didn't you answer our calls?

1288
00:56:47,640 --> 00:56:49,759
Speaker 3: And I was like, I was busy getting engaged, and

1289
00:56:49,760 --> 00:56:52,279
Speaker 3: they're like, well, the calls were about you, how you

1290
00:56:52,280 --> 00:56:53,360
Speaker 3: shouldn't get engaged.

1291
00:56:53,480 --> 00:56:55,680
Speaker 2: Yes, the calls were about how we hate the way

1292
00:56:55,680 --> 00:56:57,040
Speaker 2: that you got engaged.

1293
00:56:56,640 --> 00:57:00,440
Speaker 3: So maybe you should have listened to them. Yeah, pikes

1294
00:57:01,040 --> 00:57:03,840
Speaker 3: ikey icky, ikey, sticky, sticky sticky.

1295
00:57:04,000 --> 00:57:06,520
Speaker 2: I asked them if they still wanted me to visit them,

1296
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:09,600
Speaker 2: and they said yes. My sister then called, saying she

1297
00:57:09,800 --> 00:57:12,839
Speaker 2: can't believe how petty and immature I'm being, and how

1298
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:15,719
Speaker 2: I just had to go ahead and ruin her day.

1299
00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:19,200
Speaker 2: I didn't even mention the engagement to her my mom did.

1300
00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:22,560
Speaker 2: Wasn't my problem and I won't be changing my plans

1301
00:57:22,560 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 2: because of her inability to deal with her emotions. She

1302
00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:30,520
Speaker 2: then said, congratulations on your engagement. Don't worry it won't last.

1303
00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:36,400
Speaker 3: Oh my god, why it's being so mean? What the heck?

1304
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:37,720
Speaker 1: I just hung up the phone.

1305
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:39,840
Speaker 2: So it's safe to say we won't be talking for

1306
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:42,800
Speaker 2: the foreseeable future. But by the way, you can listen

1307
00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:46,120
Speaker 2: for the foreseeable future to full episodes.

1308
00:57:45,640 --> 00:57:46,800
Speaker 1: With stories like this.

1309
00:57:47,400 --> 00:57:50,760
Speaker 2: You can listen for a fifty three consecutive days on

1310
00:57:50,840 --> 00:57:55,160
Speaker 2: Spotify and iHeartRadio and Apple podcasts wherever you listen to podcasts,

1311
00:57:55,240 --> 00:57:58,600
Speaker 2: just search. Okay, story time so true and you've got

1312
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:01,320
Speaker 2: it all in the Paul your hand, the power.

1313
00:58:01,040 --> 00:58:03,280
Speaker 1: Of the sun. There is a little bit of story

1314
00:58:03,600 --> 00:58:04,320
Speaker 1: left here.

1315
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:07,960
Speaker 3: My final my final thing is, I think you gotta

1316
00:58:08,160 --> 00:58:11,760
Speaker 3: I think you could have maybe one more conversation with

1317
00:58:11,760 --> 00:58:13,920
Speaker 3: with either sister or parents, or maybe I'd get them

1318
00:58:13,960 --> 00:58:18,360
Speaker 3: all there and say just like, hey, I mean I

1319
00:58:18,440 --> 00:58:22,880
Speaker 3: understand that you guys didn't want this engagement to happen here. Yeah,

1320
00:58:22,920 --> 00:58:25,840
Speaker 3: but it really is no bearing on our relationship. It's

1321
00:58:25,920 --> 00:58:29,000
Speaker 3: it's a place that's exactly like, do you guys have

1322
00:58:29,080 --> 00:58:30,880
Speaker 3: anything to say about my relationship?

1323
00:58:30,920 --> 00:58:31,160
Speaker 1: Is that?

1324
00:58:31,280 --> 00:58:33,880
Speaker 3: Is there anything there that you're worried about? Because if not,

1325
00:58:34,040 --> 00:58:36,520
Speaker 3: then you know, is this really a problem that you

1326
00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:38,280
Speaker 3: want to kind of blow up our family over?

1327
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:42,040
Speaker 2: It's true, Okay, but let's finish the as to this story.

1328
00:58:42,080 --> 00:58:44,439
Speaker 2: We didn't visit our parents, and we spent the next

1329
00:58:44,520 --> 00:58:47,200
Speaker 2: day with our friends as well, and then left.

1330
00:58:47,360 --> 00:58:48,040
Speaker 3: My parents.

1331
00:58:48,120 --> 00:58:51,160
Speaker 2: Don't blame me, but want me to fix this because

1332
00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:52,840
Speaker 2: you know how your sister is.

1333
00:58:53,080 --> 00:58:54,080
Speaker 1: I'm done with her though.

1334
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:57,280
Speaker 2: I was guilty only because I actually felt like I

1335
00:58:57,360 --> 00:59:00,360
Speaker 2: was hurting her. But she had no problem talking crap

1336
00:59:00,360 --> 00:59:04,080
Speaker 2: about my boyfriend and my engagement. But well, I have

1337
00:59:04,240 --> 00:59:07,560
Speaker 2: a fiance. Have a good day. Oh there's a super

1338
00:59:07,600 --> 00:59:09,560
Speaker 2: super quick little micro update here.

1339
00:59:09,680 --> 00:59:10,400
Speaker 3: We're married.

1340
00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:14,160
Speaker 1: He got me a ring as well. It's eff and gorgeous.

1341
00:59:14,920 --> 00:59:18,320
Speaker 2: We got married at a beach, not the same one though,

1342
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:19,560
Speaker 2: and it was beautiful.

1343
00:59:19,640 --> 00:59:22,200
Speaker 1: Ah, that is the es so sweet.

1344
00:59:22,560 --> 00:59:24,760
Speaker 3: I mean, I do hope that at one point your

1345
00:59:24,760 --> 00:59:27,600
Speaker 3: sister can get over her kind of just just thinking

1346
00:59:27,640 --> 00:59:30,560
Speaker 3: about life so negatively and she's worrying about the minutia

1347
00:59:30,960 --> 00:59:33,640
Speaker 3: that has no bearing on the bearing on the happiness

1348
00:59:33,680 --> 00:59:35,000
Speaker 3: of your relationship currently.

1349
00:59:35,480 --> 00:59:37,800
Speaker 2: It just feels like she like clearly picked up like

1350
00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:42,200
Speaker 2: a really negative I don't know if it's like a

1351
00:59:42,240 --> 00:59:45,400
Speaker 2: coping mechanism or what, but just like and then the

1352
00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:47,360
Speaker 2: parents being like, you know how your sister is.

1353
00:59:47,400 --> 00:59:48,840
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, you made her that way.

1354
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:52,040
Speaker 3: Well, the thing is like, also just you the parents

1355
00:59:52,080 --> 00:59:54,520
Speaker 3: not calling her out on her behavior is not going

1356
00:59:54,560 --> 00:59:55,680
Speaker 3: to help anyone.

1357
00:59:55,520 --> 00:59:58,520
Speaker 1: Right, It's like you can't just be like, ah know

1358
00:59:58,640 --> 00:59:59,240
Speaker 1: how she is.

1359
01:00:00,000 --> 01:00:01,800
Speaker 3: I don't know how you guys are because you're just

1360
01:00:01,840 --> 01:00:02,840
Speaker 3: letting her get away.

1361
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:06,280
Speaker 1: With everything exactly. Hey, it's John here. We're gonna get

1362
01:00:06,280 --> 01:00:07,919
Speaker 1: back to the stories. Put a quick three minute ad

1363
01:00:07,920 --> 01:00:09,680
Speaker 1: break from our sponsors that keep the show going.

1364
01:00:10,800 --> 01:00:14,480
Speaker 3: My sisters stole my credit card and keeps lying about it.

1365
01:00:14,800 --> 01:00:18,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about, Chief Swipe.

1366
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:20,840
Speaker 3: She has an issue of keeping up with the Joneses.

1367
01:00:21,200 --> 01:00:25,000
Speaker 3: Her friends have lots of cool stuff, and she idolizes

1368
01:00:25,080 --> 01:00:28,400
Speaker 3: those beauty bloggers and YouTubers and wats the things they had.

1369
01:00:28,560 --> 01:00:31,920
Speaker 3: My parents are extremely wealthy but strict. They would reward

1370
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:33,960
Speaker 3: us with things when we did well in school. She

1371
01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:36,400
Speaker 3: pulled sees this year and asked for an iPhone and

1372
01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:39,680
Speaker 3: was obviously refused. By the way, this comes from twelve

1373
01:00:39,960 --> 01:00:42,560
Speaker 3: Yokuleupdo and if you want to submit your own stories,

1374
01:00:42,600 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 3: go to our slash Okay storytime separate it. So early

1375
01:00:45,120 --> 01:00:48,000
Speaker 3: this year, in September slash October, I noticed a lot

1376
01:00:48,040 --> 01:00:50,160
Speaker 3: of my makeup and shoes were going missing. We have

1377
01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:52,680
Speaker 3: the same sized feet, and the makeup items were popular

1378
01:00:52,760 --> 01:00:54,920
Speaker 3: cult classics. I put up a camera when I went

1379
01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:57,360
Speaker 3: to work one evening and came back to check lo

1380
01:00:57,560 --> 01:01:00,360
Speaker 3: and Bold. She was taking stuff from my drawers and

1381
01:01:00,440 --> 01:01:03,880
Speaker 3: sitting down at my vanity to use it. Whatever. She's twelve,

1382
01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:07,360
Speaker 3: she wants to use makeup. I destashed some items I

1383
01:01:07,440 --> 01:01:09,240
Speaker 3: never used, and I gave her a fair amount for

1384
01:01:09,280 --> 01:01:12,000
Speaker 3: her birthday. My other sister and I other siss does

1385
01:01:12,040 --> 01:01:14,280
Speaker 3: not live with us, chipped in for a Sephora gift card.

1386
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:17,160
Speaker 3: We thought maybe then she'd stop taking my stuff. It

1387
01:01:17,240 --> 01:01:20,120
Speaker 3: did stop. It looks like because nothing has gone missing,

1388
01:01:20,160 --> 01:01:22,160
Speaker 3: and I recorded for about a month and only saw

1389
01:01:22,200 --> 01:01:24,080
Speaker 3: her in my room when she went to fetch the dog,

1390
01:01:24,200 --> 01:01:28,440
Speaker 3: so nothing suspicious. However, lately, she's been getting packages from Amazon,

1391
01:01:28,640 --> 01:01:31,880
Speaker 3: she's buying SIMS games, and she's using a Netflix account.

1392
01:01:32,000 --> 01:01:34,560
Speaker 3: She stated she's been winning all of these things, and

1393
01:01:34,560 --> 01:01:37,280
Speaker 3: despite questioning her, she refused to really admit where she

1394
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:39,480
Speaker 3: got all of this stuff from. So I dropped it.

1395
01:01:39,880 --> 01:01:40,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, I won Netflix.

1396
01:01:41,440 --> 01:01:45,760
Speaker 3: M Yeah, and OPI's like, what competition did you win? Netflix?

1397
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:47,880
Speaker 3: And she's like, nah, I don't know. They were about

1398
01:01:47,920 --> 01:01:51,160
Speaker 3: two weeks ago everything on our desk, stop Pewter went missing.

1399
01:01:51,240 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 3: Looking into the system recovery files, it said that there

1400
01:01:53,720 --> 01:01:56,800
Speaker 3: was a system file reset something along those lines. At

1401
01:01:56,800 --> 01:01:59,800
Speaker 3: eleven thirty am on a Thursday, Mom and I discovered

1402
01:01:59,800 --> 01:02:02,440
Speaker 3: the computer was wiped. That evening, I saw my sister

1403
01:02:02,520 --> 01:02:04,600
Speaker 3: on the computer when I left for work. We know

1404
01:02:04,760 --> 01:02:08,040
Speaker 3: she did something, but again she refused to answer. Then

1405
01:02:08,080 --> 01:02:12,120
Speaker 3: today I got my master card bill. It was absurdly high.

1406
01:02:12,200 --> 01:02:14,560
Speaker 3: I paid seventy eight dollars for Yoga pass and then

1407
01:02:14,640 --> 01:02:17,280
Speaker 3: ten dollars for something from eBay. At first I thought

1408
01:02:17,280 --> 01:02:20,120
Speaker 3: my card info had been stolen, but the purchases all

1409
01:02:20,160 --> 01:02:24,400
Speaker 3: match up with stuff she has Origin Canada, Netflix, Amazon, Amazon,

1410
01:02:24,480 --> 01:02:29,000
Speaker 3: Amazon One, eBay purchase, all online purchases seven hundred dollars worth.

1411
01:02:29,160 --> 01:02:32,400
Speaker 1: You, girl, my sister's almost felonying you right now.

1412
01:02:32,480 --> 01:02:35,240
Speaker 3: It what she is. She stole your credit card and

1413
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:37,920
Speaker 3: is spending seven hundred dollars on things. I have no

1414
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:40,200
Speaker 3: idea what the f to do. My parents are again

1415
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:43,040
Speaker 3: super strict. Obviously I have to tell them, but they're

1416
01:02:43,040 --> 01:02:45,040
Speaker 3: gonna lose it on her. But I'm beginning to think

1417
01:02:45,080 --> 01:02:47,320
Speaker 3: she has a serious effing problem. I have the money

1418
01:02:47,360 --> 01:02:49,200
Speaker 3: to pay down this card, but I don't want to.

1419
01:02:49,400 --> 01:02:51,400
Speaker 3: I want to recoup the losses, but how can I

1420
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:53,720
Speaker 3: get a refund on something like Netflix? I can't. I've

1421
01:02:53,720 --> 01:02:55,880
Speaker 3: already called to cancel the card. I don't know what

1422
01:02:55,960 --> 01:02:59,120
Speaker 3: steps to take next. There is an update. I'm wondering

1423
01:02:59,160 --> 01:03:01,160
Speaker 3: do we know how old he is, because it seems

1424
01:03:01,200 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 3: like maybe she's seventeen or something like that, so old

1425
01:03:04,640 --> 01:03:06,320
Speaker 3: enough to have a credit card, to have a job

1426
01:03:06,360 --> 01:03:09,400
Speaker 3: and everything, but still young enough that she's still living

1427
01:03:09,400 --> 01:03:11,840
Speaker 3: with her parents. Is maybe a bit hesitant to rat

1428
01:03:11,880 --> 01:03:15,480
Speaker 3: her sister out. But I think your sister doesn't necessarily

1429
01:03:15,560 --> 01:03:19,080
Speaker 3: have a like problem. But she's twelve, and she thinks

1430
01:03:19,120 --> 01:03:21,840
Speaker 3: that she can get away with spending whatever she wants.

1431
01:03:21,960 --> 01:03:24,360
Speaker 3: She doesn't understand, she doesn't seem to understand how money works,

1432
01:03:24,360 --> 01:03:26,000
Speaker 3: and you need to get your parents involved so they

1433
01:03:26,320 --> 01:03:27,000
Speaker 3: can parent.

1434
01:03:26,800 --> 01:03:28,760
Speaker 1: Her, like low key, like I don't know.

1435
01:03:28,840 --> 01:03:31,400
Speaker 2: It feels like you kind of mighta set this up

1436
01:03:31,440 --> 01:03:34,680
Speaker 2: accidentally by like catching her stealing from you and then

1437
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:37,360
Speaker 2: letting it, and then instead of telling her about it,

1438
01:03:37,480 --> 01:03:40,040
Speaker 2: you gave her the thing that she was stealing from exactly,

1439
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:40,880
Speaker 2: and then she just.

1440
01:03:40,880 --> 01:03:42,640
Speaker 3: Got awarded her. You rewarded her.

1441
01:03:42,800 --> 01:03:45,000
Speaker 1: She was like, I am a master criminal.

1442
01:03:45,160 --> 01:03:47,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, And if you don't tell your parents, like you're like, oh,

1443
01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:49,080
Speaker 3: I don't want to get in trouble. She's done a

1444
01:03:49,400 --> 01:03:52,680
Speaker 3: bad thing. She stole seven hundred dollars. She needs to

1445
01:03:52,720 --> 01:03:55,959
Speaker 3: be parented, she needs a form of punishment in some way.

1446
01:03:56,120 --> 01:03:57,800
Speaker 3: But there is an update. I just want to add

1447
01:03:57,840 --> 01:04:00,000
Speaker 3: in some points that came up in comments I did.

1448
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:01,640
Speaker 3: I'd get mad at her when she stole from me

1449
01:04:01,680 --> 01:04:04,000
Speaker 3: the last time. I thought that being proactive by helping

1450
01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:06,000
Speaker 3: her get what she wants in a proper way would help,

1451
01:04:06,200 --> 01:04:08,080
Speaker 3: but we did have a nasty fight about it. I

1452
01:04:08,120 --> 01:04:10,960
Speaker 3: didn't just shrug it off. I now realize I totally

1453
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:13,240
Speaker 3: eft that up. My parents were strict when I was younger,

1454
01:04:13,360 --> 01:04:15,600
Speaker 3: so to me, strict is just the word for them,

1455
01:04:15,600 --> 01:04:18,480
Speaker 3: but for her, they have completely checked out. I am

1456
01:04:18,600 --> 01:04:21,400
Speaker 3: basically her parent. My older sister not as much, but

1457
01:04:21,480 --> 01:04:23,920
Speaker 3: she still is involved a fair amount more than my

1458
01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:24,920
Speaker 3: actual parents are.

1459
01:04:25,240 --> 01:04:25,560
Speaker 1: Yikes.

1460
01:04:25,800 --> 01:04:27,720
Speaker 3: I do want to lock my door, but it's where

1461
01:04:27,760 --> 01:04:30,040
Speaker 3: the dog hangs out and he needs to leave to

1462
01:04:30,120 --> 01:04:33,120
Speaker 3: pea sometimes, so I'm hesitant. I did, however, decide to

1463
01:04:33,240 --> 01:04:36,440
Speaker 3: order a nannycam for my bedroom. I am still considering

1464
01:04:36,480 --> 01:04:38,400
Speaker 3: the law. Last night, I came home from work and

1465
01:04:38,440 --> 01:04:40,480
Speaker 3: my parents had gone to bed, as well as my sister,

1466
01:04:40,720 --> 01:04:43,240
Speaker 3: so I decided to leave it until the morning. But

1467
01:04:43,360 --> 01:04:46,080
Speaker 3: I heard giggling coming from my sister's room, so I

1468
01:04:46,120 --> 01:04:48,560
Speaker 3: approached her and I decided to ask her about it

1469
01:04:48,560 --> 01:04:51,360
Speaker 3: before I talked to my parents. Well, she full and

1470
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:54,440
Speaker 3: denied it. I had printed my credit card statement and

1471
01:04:54,480 --> 01:04:56,160
Speaker 3: I showed it her and she just said it wasn't

1472
01:04:56,200 --> 01:04:57,840
Speaker 3: her and she didn't do it. I am the person

1473
01:04:57,880 --> 01:05:00,200
Speaker 3: with a mail key. We have a community mailbox, so

1474
01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:02,520
Speaker 3: I was taking in her Amazon packages. They were from

1475
01:05:02,560 --> 01:05:04,680
Speaker 3: the marketplace and a few of them had prices on

1476
01:05:04,720 --> 01:05:07,160
Speaker 3: them so they could go through the customs, and those

1477
01:05:07,200 --> 01:05:09,840
Speaker 3: prices matched what was on my statement. My dad is

1478
01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:11,640
Speaker 3: a key to so he probably took in the ones

1479
01:05:11,640 --> 01:05:13,960
Speaker 3: I didn't see, which is why I didn't really realize

1480
01:05:13,960 --> 01:05:16,600
Speaker 3: it was such a big problem. I also pointed out

1481
01:05:16,600 --> 01:05:18,600
Speaker 3: that Netflix charge. She said that she was using my

1482
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:21,520
Speaker 3: other sister's Netflix. Our other sister lives in an area

1483
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:25,000
Speaker 3: about two hours behind our time, so I texted her

1484
01:05:25,040 --> 01:05:27,440
Speaker 3: right then and she said she doesn't even have Netflix

1485
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:30,520
Speaker 3: anymore as it interfered too much with her doctorate work.

1486
01:05:30,560 --> 01:05:32,960
Speaker 3: My younger sister lied and she said she was still

1487
01:05:33,040 --> 01:05:35,040
Speaker 3: using it. I told her I'm giving her one chance

1488
01:05:35,080 --> 01:05:37,480
Speaker 3: to admit it to me. Otherwise, I'll be talking to

1489
01:05:37,480 --> 01:05:40,520
Speaker 3: the parents, and I will also be calling the cops. Still,

1490
01:05:40,640 --> 01:05:43,120
Speaker 3: she refused to admit. I even started to doubt myself.

1491
01:05:43,440 --> 01:05:46,480
Speaker 3: Maybe she didn't actually do it. Girl, Stop believing a

1492
01:05:46,560 --> 01:05:47,720
Speaker 3: twelve year old's lies.

1493
01:05:48,440 --> 01:05:51,320
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, that's so funny. Did she just hit the

1494
01:05:51,480 --> 01:05:54,640
Speaker 1: numb I didn't do that? Do it so well? She's like,

1495
01:05:54,760 --> 01:05:57,480
Speaker 1: did she did she do that? Did I do this?

1496
01:05:57,600 --> 01:06:02,080
Speaker 3: She's like, maybe someone else was buying the freaking squish mellows.

1497
01:06:02,400 --> 01:06:04,640
Speaker 1: Apparently that works so well it can even make you president.

1498
01:06:04,800 --> 01:06:07,680
Speaker 3: I was going over all the charges and realized she'd

1499
01:06:07,720 --> 01:06:10,360
Speaker 3: have to have an Amazon account. I was the one

1500
01:06:10,360 --> 01:06:12,720
Speaker 3: who set up her email address so many years ago.

1501
01:06:13,040 --> 01:06:15,920
Speaker 3: If she forgot her password, my email was the recovery.

1502
01:06:16,120 --> 01:06:18,640
Speaker 3: I reset her password through my email. Not only had

1503
01:06:18,680 --> 01:06:21,320
Speaker 3: she charged seven hundred dollars in the last billing cycle,

1504
01:06:21,440 --> 01:06:24,560
Speaker 3: but yesterday she bought two more things off of Amazon

1505
01:06:24,640 --> 01:06:27,320
Speaker 3: and iTunes receipt, got a receipt from a site called

1506
01:06:27,320 --> 01:06:30,000
Speaker 3: the SIMS Resource and a Club Penguin membership.

1507
01:06:30,040 --> 01:06:32,480
Speaker 2: She's really using your credit card to buy resources for

1508
01:06:32,520 --> 01:06:33,640
Speaker 2: the SIMS video game.

1509
01:06:33,760 --> 01:06:35,960
Speaker 3: Girl, what do we know? What date? This was supposted?

1510
01:06:36,120 --> 01:06:38,960
Speaker 3: Because well, no if it was recently, and then why

1511
01:06:39,040 --> 01:06:40,800
Speaker 3: is she paying for the membership because you can get

1512
01:06:40,800 --> 01:06:41,400
Speaker 3: it for free now.

1513
01:06:41,520 --> 01:06:45,440
Speaker 1: They totally like, why is she paying for a membership? Coool?

1514
01:06:45,680 --> 01:06:47,600
Speaker 2: She got the paid membership, Well, it's not like she's

1515
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:49,200
Speaker 2: paying for it is ten years ago.

1516
01:06:49,360 --> 01:06:49,600
Speaker 1: Dang.

1517
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:53,720
Speaker 2: Wait, so this girl's twenty two. Now, this could be

1518
01:06:53,760 --> 01:06:56,480
Speaker 2: one of your friends and you wouldn't even know.

1519
01:06:56,640 --> 01:06:59,520
Speaker 3: I reset her Amazon password and I canceled the order

1520
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:02,000
Speaker 3: she plays. I emailed Club Penguin and Netflix and told

1521
01:07:02,040 --> 01:07:04,120
Speaker 3: them she was a minor and was not authorized to

1522
01:07:04,120 --> 01:07:07,720
Speaker 3: purchase the membership. Club Penguin was awesome, and they reverse

1523
01:07:07,760 --> 01:07:10,400
Speaker 3: the charges for me. Nice. I guess they deal with

1524
01:07:10,400 --> 01:07:13,520
Speaker 3: this a lot. Netflix hasn't responded yet. This morning, I

1525
01:07:13,560 --> 01:07:15,560
Speaker 3: talked to my parents. They offer to pay it for me,

1526
01:07:15,680 --> 01:07:17,800
Speaker 3: and I told them that's not the point. I wanted

1527
01:07:17,840 --> 01:07:20,880
Speaker 3: to learn what she did was wrong. They just dismissed it.

1528
01:07:20,920 --> 01:07:22,920
Speaker 3: So I told them, if they don't do something, then

1529
01:07:22,920 --> 01:07:24,920
Speaker 3: I will not be doing their job for them anymore.

1530
01:07:25,040 --> 01:07:28,200
Speaker 3: I will disengage totally from my sister's life. I told

1531
01:07:28,240 --> 01:07:31,000
Speaker 3: them that by ignoring this, my grad school applications are

1532
01:07:31,040 --> 01:07:34,520
Speaker 3: immediately moved out of province. This did upset them because

1533
01:07:34,520 --> 01:07:36,520
Speaker 3: my older sister has gone the same route due to

1534
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,440
Speaker 3: their crazy behavior, so they decided to talk to her.

1535
01:07:39,560 --> 01:07:41,080
Speaker 3: I don't know what they said as I had to

1536
01:07:41,080 --> 01:07:43,600
Speaker 3: go walk my dog, but looks like there's been zero

1537
01:07:43,720 --> 01:07:47,160
Speaker 3: consequences because she looks fine and is still hold up

1538
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:49,560
Speaker 3: in her room. My dad just transferred the amount to

1539
01:07:49,600 --> 01:07:52,520
Speaker 3: my bank account, so I'm assuming they still don't give

1540
01:07:52,520 --> 01:07:55,000
Speaker 3: a crap. I haven't yet paid the card. It is

1541
01:07:55,080 --> 01:07:57,560
Speaker 3: due August twenty seventh, so I have time. This is

1542
01:07:57,760 --> 01:07:58,640
Speaker 3: so frustrated.

1543
01:07:58,640 --> 01:07:59,560
Speaker 1: There's no one caring.

1544
01:08:00,120 --> 01:08:02,240
Speaker 3: They're rich. I feel like these parents are just super

1545
01:08:02,320 --> 01:08:04,440
Speaker 3: rich and they're like whatever, it's just a couple. Like

1546
01:08:04,480 --> 01:08:05,840
Speaker 3: you know, it's Cobo one hundred dollars.

1547
01:08:05,880 --> 01:08:08,280
Speaker 1: Who cares either rich or not have principles.

1548
01:08:08,560 --> 01:08:11,760
Speaker 2: Sometimes now we're like just like generally like being like, hey,

1549
01:08:11,840 --> 01:08:14,920
Speaker 2: don't be a don't thief. Bad person who's a thief

1550
01:08:14,960 --> 01:08:16,080
Speaker 2: and steals from your sister.

1551
01:08:16,200 --> 01:08:17,960
Speaker 3: The thing is like when I think sometimes when you

1552
01:08:18,040 --> 01:08:20,960
Speaker 3: have the money to just make problems go away, it's like, well,

1553
01:08:20,960 --> 01:08:23,360
Speaker 3: they're not even problems. The thing is I think with

1554
01:08:23,560 --> 01:08:26,799
Speaker 3: because she's twelve years old, like she's not a monster,

1555
01:08:27,000 --> 01:08:31,559
Speaker 3: she's not, you know, a serial thief or whatever. She's

1556
01:08:31,600 --> 01:08:34,840
Speaker 3: a twelve year old who doesn't understand how money works.

1557
01:08:34,920 --> 01:08:37,439
Speaker 2: You're really up well. I think she might understand a

1558
01:08:37,479 --> 01:08:39,920
Speaker 2: little bit. I think she understands money gets you think.

1559
01:08:40,080 --> 01:08:42,840
Speaker 3: Yes, she understands that. Kids understand that money. Yet you

1560
01:08:42,880 --> 01:08:45,080
Speaker 3: take money and you get the things that you want,

1561
01:08:45,160 --> 01:08:47,280
Speaker 3: and that's it. That's what they understand. And it's up

1562
01:08:47,320 --> 01:08:49,000
Speaker 3: to the parents and the people in their life and

1563
01:08:49,000 --> 01:08:52,000
Speaker 3: the adults in their life to teach them that spending

1564
01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:55,880
Speaker 3: that money has consequences and money is not an infinite resource,

1565
01:08:56,160 --> 01:08:58,479
Speaker 3: this finite. I talked to my boyfriend and he has

1566
01:08:58,479 --> 01:09:00,840
Speaker 3: some friends on the police force as well, some paramedic

1567
01:09:00,840 --> 01:09:03,200
Speaker 3: friends who know the cops who do the DARE circuits,

1568
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:05,120
Speaker 3: so he's going to try and contact one of them.

1569
01:09:05,120 --> 01:09:07,639
Speaker 3: My older sister actually has a planned visit for next Tuesday,

1570
01:09:07,760 --> 01:09:10,400
Speaker 3: so we are trying to coordinate the potential police visit

1571
01:09:10,439 --> 01:09:13,559
Speaker 3: with that. My older sister was shocked to hear what happened,

1572
01:09:13,600 --> 01:09:15,080
Speaker 3: and when I told her that I might do my

1573
01:09:15,200 --> 01:09:18,240
Speaker 3: master's out of province, she said she and her husband

1574
01:09:18,320 --> 01:09:20,280
Speaker 3: have room for me at their place. I could even

1575
01:09:20,280 --> 01:09:22,320
Speaker 3: bring my dog if I wanted. To so maybe that

1576
01:09:22,439 --> 01:09:25,080
Speaker 3: is something to consider and there is a second update.

1577
01:09:25,280 --> 01:09:28,120
Speaker 3: Siana Te says, sounds like the parents just really suck.

1578
01:09:28,200 --> 01:09:30,280
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, they're not parenting at all. Opie is

1579
01:09:30,320 --> 01:09:32,759
Speaker 3: doing everything to try and get her sister back on track,

1580
01:09:32,800 --> 01:09:36,080
Speaker 3: which is props to Ope, because you know, this is

1581
01:09:36,720 --> 01:09:38,640
Speaker 3: a lot of work to do for a child, but

1582
01:09:38,760 --> 01:09:41,120
Speaker 3: is not your child, and it's also actually stealing from.

1583
01:09:40,960 --> 01:09:42,360
Speaker 1: You, actively stealing from me.

1584
01:09:42,439 --> 01:09:44,479
Speaker 3: Actively stealing from you, and you're still like going the

1585
01:09:44,520 --> 01:09:47,000
Speaker 3: extra mile and being like, hey, let's get a freaking

1586
01:09:47,320 --> 01:09:49,559
Speaker 3: cop into this. I don't want you to go down

1587
01:09:49,600 --> 01:09:51,160
Speaker 3: this path because it's a dangerous path.

1588
01:09:51,280 --> 01:09:53,519
Speaker 2: I we I mean, is it all coming from it

1589
01:09:53,760 --> 01:09:56,080
Speaker 2: or partially coming from like let's get the police in

1590
01:09:56,200 --> 01:09:58,479
Speaker 2: buff Also could be that I would probably be a

1591
01:09:58,479 --> 01:10:00,960
Speaker 2: little bit of that side if I The thing.

1592
01:10:00,880 --> 01:10:04,320
Speaker 3: Is that I don't think that o'pe necessarily is a case.

1593
01:10:04,600 --> 01:10:06,439
Speaker 3: You know, it's a twelve year old. I don't think

1594
01:10:06,439 --> 01:10:08,000
Speaker 3: she's a case, but I think, yeah, I think it's

1595
01:10:08,280 --> 01:10:10,280
Speaker 3: it seems to me like Opie's try to.

1596
01:10:10,240 --> 01:10:12,639
Speaker 2: Teach her sister, but she's got a case, a case

1597
01:10:12,680 --> 01:10:14,840
Speaker 2: of twelve year old Thievery sure, Yeah, but.

1598
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:17,080
Speaker 3: There is a second update, my boyfriend reached out to

1599
01:10:17,120 --> 01:10:19,719
Speaker 3: a copy knows who actually referred him to another person.

1600
01:10:19,840 --> 01:10:22,400
Speaker 3: He will be coming over Tuesday afternoon after my sister

1601
01:10:22,439 --> 01:10:24,880
Speaker 3: and brother in law arrive. After the cop talks to

1602
01:10:24,920 --> 01:10:26,760
Speaker 3: my sister and my boyfriend is going to take her

1603
01:10:26,760 --> 01:10:29,800
Speaker 3: to the army offices, which are stationed near the police headquarters.

1604
01:10:29,840 --> 01:10:32,080
Speaker 3: She's going to get a tour of both. We decided

1605
01:10:32,120 --> 01:10:34,320
Speaker 3: to do that part second because she might be more

1606
01:10:34,320 --> 01:10:36,840
Speaker 3: cooperative after the cops shows up. My sister and I

1607
01:10:36,840 --> 01:10:38,760
Speaker 3: are going to talk to our parents after finding her

1608
01:10:38,800 --> 01:10:42,360
Speaker 3: a volunteer placement ooh. My older sister suggested that she

1609
01:10:42,439 --> 01:10:46,920
Speaker 3: might need some perspective AKAA, not owning that game is

1610
01:10:46,960 --> 01:10:48,840
Speaker 3: not the end of the world, and some hard hitting

1611
01:10:48,880 --> 01:10:51,120
Speaker 3: scenarios might be the best way to get that through.

1612
01:10:51,240 --> 01:10:53,719
Speaker 3: I called one of my cousins, who my younger sister

1613
01:10:53,760 --> 01:10:56,320
Speaker 3: really admires, and she's going to come talk to my

1614
01:10:56,360 --> 01:10:59,759
Speaker 3: younger sister too. When the cops got intervention style, I suppose.

1615
01:11:00,160 --> 01:11:01,680
Speaker 3: Cop and I talked on the phone just a few

1616
01:11:01,680 --> 01:11:04,000
Speaker 3: minutes ago, and he said that this is not the

1617
01:11:04,040 --> 01:11:06,160
Speaker 3: first time he's done this. He has a lot of

1618
01:11:06,160 --> 01:11:08,320
Speaker 3: stuff he can say, so I trust he will do

1619
01:11:08,360 --> 01:11:10,080
Speaker 3: that on his own. He told me that he often

1620
01:11:10,120 --> 01:11:12,200
Speaker 3: refers these kids to a counselor, and that if my

1621
01:11:12,240 --> 01:11:14,960
Speaker 3: sister seems willing, he can refer us too. Everyone is

1622
01:11:15,000 --> 01:11:17,759
Speaker 3: being really helpful. I have decided not to press charges.

1623
01:11:17,840 --> 01:11:19,920
Speaker 3: Yet a lot of you are coming down hard on

1624
01:11:19,960 --> 01:11:22,120
Speaker 3: my sister, and she deserves it. I might show her

1625
01:11:22,160 --> 01:11:26,280
Speaker 3: these threads. However, she is still my sister. She's twelve,

1626
01:11:26,520 --> 01:11:28,479
Speaker 3: my oldest sister, and I basically raised her. You do

1627
01:11:28,560 --> 01:11:30,719
Speaker 3: not want to turn her into someone with a criminal record,

1628
01:11:30,760 --> 01:11:32,680
Speaker 3: even though yes, she deserves it. But you know what,

1629
01:11:32,720 --> 01:11:35,439
Speaker 3: you guys deserve to listen to full episodes of stories

1630
01:11:35,600 --> 01:11:38,120
Speaker 3: just like this. Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or

1631
01:11:38,160 --> 01:11:39,880
Speaker 3: iHeartRadio and search a book a stret time.

1632
01:11:39,960 --> 01:11:43,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, I sentence you to fifty three days of consecutive story.

1633
01:11:43,760 --> 01:11:46,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's your punishment, Opie's sister. But I think there

1634
01:11:46,880 --> 01:11:48,479
Speaker 3: is a little bit more to the story. But I

1635
01:11:48,479 --> 01:11:50,559
Speaker 3: think that OPI kind of knows. It seems like you

1636
01:11:50,600 --> 01:11:52,760
Speaker 3: know what you're doing. It seems like you're approaching this

1637
01:11:53,120 --> 01:11:56,040
Speaker 3: in a good way. I think the origin, the only,

1638
01:11:56,120 --> 01:11:58,880
Speaker 3: you know, only mistake that you made was originally just

1639
01:11:58,880 --> 01:11:59,960
Speaker 3: giving her what she wanted.

1640
01:12:00,160 --> 01:12:02,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, you should have confronted her about like, hey, so

1641
01:12:02,800 --> 01:12:05,479
Speaker 2: I noticed that you were sneaking into my room and

1642
01:12:05,680 --> 01:12:09,479
Speaker 2: stealing my makeup from me, Yeah, which you know is

1643
01:12:09,640 --> 01:12:13,960
Speaker 2: not a good thing. Yeah, but here's my old makeup

1644
01:12:13,960 --> 01:12:16,160
Speaker 2: I don't use exactly, which if you want to come

1645
01:12:16,240 --> 01:12:16,559
Speaker 2: to me.

1646
01:12:16,560 --> 01:12:18,720
Speaker 1: And asked, I would have given it to you.

1647
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:21,479
Speaker 2: So but instead you just kind of silently gave her

1648
01:12:21,479 --> 01:12:23,879
Speaker 2: exactly what she wanted without saying anything. So she probably

1649
01:12:23,960 --> 01:12:25,479
Speaker 2: was like, I can get away with that doing that.

1650
01:12:25,880 --> 01:12:27,600
Speaker 2: So maybe if I rob a bank, they'll give me

1651
01:12:27,680 --> 01:12:28,960
Speaker 2: one hundred thousand dollars.

1652
01:12:29,160 --> 01:12:30,880
Speaker 1: But there's a little bit left to the story.

1653
01:12:31,080 --> 01:12:33,759
Speaker 3: Right now, we have a chance to rehabilitate her versus

1654
01:12:33,760 --> 01:12:36,160
Speaker 3: deciding she's not worth it and dumping her. If I leave,

1655
01:12:36,240 --> 01:12:39,120
Speaker 3: she has no chance. In heck. With my parents, I

1656
01:12:39,200 --> 01:12:41,880
Speaker 3: still will be partly responsible. If she goes the wrong

1657
01:12:41,920 --> 01:12:44,759
Speaker 3: way and I didn't just try, it might be our house,

1658
01:12:45,040 --> 01:12:47,519
Speaker 3: not just her. We have extremely left up parents, as

1659
01:12:47,520 --> 01:12:50,120
Speaker 3: you guys have noted. I cannot change their ways, but

1660
01:12:50,240 --> 01:12:51,880
Speaker 3: if I can get her out of here, I will

1661
01:12:51,880 --> 01:12:53,439
Speaker 3: do so. But I can only do that if she

1662
01:12:53,520 --> 01:12:56,760
Speaker 3: agrees to change things. If she doesn't, then the best

1663
01:12:56,800 --> 01:12:58,920
Speaker 3: idea is for me to leave because I want to

1664
01:12:58,920 --> 01:13:01,800
Speaker 3: have a life too, and that is the end of

1665
01:13:01,920 --> 01:13:02,599
Speaker 3: that story.

1666
01:13:02,840 --> 01:13:06,360
Speaker 1: Yaoza, Well, yeah, I don't know how fed up your parents.

1667
01:13:06,040 --> 01:13:09,200
Speaker 2: Are, but probably would be a good idea to move

1668
01:13:09,240 --> 01:13:10,639
Speaker 2: away from home.

1669
01:13:11,040 --> 01:13:13,639
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I understand that kind of like older sibling

1670
01:13:13,760 --> 01:13:17,320
Speaker 3: guilt of wanting to help out your sibling, even even

1671
01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:20,200
Speaker 3: if the right decision for you, Maybe getting out of

1672
01:13:20,240 --> 01:13:21,320
Speaker 3: that situation.

1673
01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:21,960
Speaker 1: Seems like you're doing it.

1674
01:13:22,000 --> 01:13:24,120
Speaker 2: And yeah, I think earlier you said something about this

1675
01:13:24,200 --> 01:13:25,759
Speaker 2: is like this is like they want attention.

1676
01:13:25,920 --> 01:13:28,679
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, sounds like that could be the case. Yeah,