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Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys

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Speaker 1: online at Advocates law dot com. Russell is on the

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Speaker 1: phone today for a first date follow up and he's

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Speaker 1: getting ghosted by a woman named Christy. So we're about

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Speaker 1: to call her and see if she'll tell us why

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Speaker 1: she's ghosting him and maybe get him a second date.

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Speaker 1: But first, Russell, how long has it been since you

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Speaker 1: heard from Christine?

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Speaker 2: Five days? And he said that very confidently, like you

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Speaker 2: have been counting?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's I mean, you know, you can always debate it.

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Speaker 3: Does the first day count or you know what? But

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Speaker 3: I would say five days?

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Speaker 2: Five days? Have you tried to reach out to her?

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Speaker 2: I did.

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Speaker 3: I I texted a hey, what's going on about two

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Speaker 3: days ago?

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Speaker 2: That got no response.

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Speaker 3: But but you know, I mean, I can only one

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Speaker 3: text can always be forgiven if not being responded to,

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Speaker 3: and then but I felt like if I sent a

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Speaker 3: second text, that's when it started to get creepy.

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Speaker 1: Fair well, tell us about your date, Okay, So all right,

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Speaker 1: So I liked I liked Chrissy.

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Speaker 2: Chrissy.

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Speaker 3: She she had this like calm confidence, like like this

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Speaker 3: chill like I got my life together energy like you

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Speaker 3: just spot somebody who's like got their stuff together. And

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Speaker 3: but but like she would like laugh with these like

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Speaker 3: trainy snorts, really adorable, Like you don't like like someone

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Speaker 3: just like laughs with with snorts. You can tell like

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Speaker 3: it's not like a fake laugh, because no one would

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Speaker 3: laugh that way, right. And she also would talk with

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Speaker 3: her hands, but not like being overly dramatic. She was

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Speaker 3: just like expressive. So you felt like you were really

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Speaker 3: drawn into conversation with her. And so we went on

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Speaker 3: this like simple date, like an indoor kind of date thing.

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Speaker 2: What did you do indoors?

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Speaker 3: So we met at this like paint your own mug

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Speaker 3: night at like this wine bar. It's like low key, cozy,

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Speaker 3: warm lighting, you know, lots of mismatch chairs and indie

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Speaker 3: music and stuff like that, and uh, and we sat

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Speaker 3: across from each other and painted our mugs while tearing

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Speaker 3: childhood stories, you know, sipping peanut on the water.

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Speaker 2: It's a nice spin on sipping paint. Yeah, it was.

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Speaker 2: It was nice.

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Speaker 3: And then there was a moment that I think probably

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Speaker 3: brought the ghosting along.

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Speaker 2: So while we're.

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Speaker 3: Painting, Chrissy goes up and she's chatting with a girl

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Speaker 3: the front counter because she needs to grab more glazes

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Speaker 3: like you do. And but but then she said, I

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Speaker 3: always attract the quiet ones and the front desk girl

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Speaker 3: like laughed, and and and then she responded with, well, hey,

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Speaker 3: those are usually the weird ones.

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Speaker 2: And she was like, usually the weird ones. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: And it's like it's weird when you hear you can't

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Speaker 3: unhear that. The moment you hear that, your brain just

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Speaker 3: starts spiraling, spiraling and spiraling.

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Speaker 2: Even though you're in the middle of the date.

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Speaker 3: You're just trying to like throw yourself together and despite

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Speaker 3: the fact that your brain is just going in a

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Speaker 3: hundred directions. Uh. And and I like, honestly, like I

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Speaker 3: was convinced she was she was talking about me, because

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Speaker 3: who else was she going to be talking about at

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Speaker 3: this wine bar. And like I'm thinking, like, Okay, she

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Speaker 3: thinks I'm awkward, or like I'm too introverted, or or

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Speaker 3: like I'm not like fun or anything, or like just

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Speaker 3: not like the guy she had hoped she wanted. So

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Speaker 3: I spend the entire rest of the date overthinking every

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Speaker 3: single word that comes out of my mouth, Like am

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Speaker 3: I being boring?

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Speaker 2: Am I being too serious? Too slow to joke?

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Speaker 3: Back, I like, like, should I be talking or should

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Speaker 3: I be talking less?

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Speaker 2: Did I pick the wrong mug shape?

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Speaker 3: You know, It's like did I go for the ta

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Speaker 3: mug when I should have gone for like the gigantic

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Speaker 3: black coffee mug. And I'm just you know, and it

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Speaker 3: just it just felt like like emotional and insecure, and

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Speaker 3: I felt like I was everything I'm not for the

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Speaker 3: rest of the date. And even though and I mean,

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Speaker 3: Christy seemed totally normal and she even laughed a few times,

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Speaker 3: but like I felt like I was like closing off

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Speaker 3: and I was trying way too hard to not seem weird,

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Speaker 3: which is like the best way to seem weird.

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Speaker 2: But so at the end, like we took a picture

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Speaker 2: of holding our mud.

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Speaker 3: Ruggs, but in my head, like I would, I just

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Speaker 3: thought like she she was stiff and like she's uncomfortable,

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Speaker 3: and like stiff and uncomfortable because of me.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but I felt chemistry. So that's the thing.

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Speaker 3: It's like I felt like chemistry, but like embarrassment, Like

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Speaker 3: she seemed totally through me.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like you had a really emotional night.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, And so after five days of silence, I'm convinced

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Speaker 4: she probably told her friends, I'm the weird, quiet guy

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Speaker 4: at the wine bar, and I just I feel like

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Speaker 4: I just want to explain, maybe try again, because I

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Speaker 4: think there's.

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Speaker 2: Potential if, like we could just get off on the

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Speaker 2: right foot.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Russell is on the phone and he's getting ghosted

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Speaker 1: by a woman named Chrissy. So in a second, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna call her see if she'll tell us why she's

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Speaker 1: ghosting him and maybe get him a second date. But

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Speaker 1: before we do that, Russell, why don't you break down

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Speaker 1: your date again for us real quick.

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Speaker 3: Five days ago, I had a great what started off

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Speaker 3: as a great date with Chrissy at this wine bar

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Speaker 3: where we were painting mugs, and then all of a sudden,

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Speaker 3: I overhear her talking about the weird and creepy quiet

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Speaker 3: once and I just it sent me the rest of

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Speaker 3: the date. I was like, not stand offish, but I

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Speaker 3: definitely was overthinking everything.

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Speaker 2: And now she hasn't sent me a text or anything

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Speaker 2: in five days.

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Speaker 1: And you're pretty sure when she was talking to the

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Speaker 1: person at the place you went about the quiet, weird,

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Speaker 1: creepy people.

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Speaker 3: Anybody else she would have been talking about unless she

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Speaker 3: had a full history with the person working at.

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Speaker 2: The wine bar. All right, well here we go. Are

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Speaker 2: you ready for us to call her? I think so? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Okay, Hi, man, I speak to Chrissy. Please, Hey Chrissy,

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Speaker 1: how are you? This is a radio show. It's called

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Speaker 1: The Jubil Show.

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Speaker 2: Hi, Chrissy. I'm Nina, I'm Victoria, I'm Freezing producer, and

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Speaker 2: my name is Jubil. How are you.

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Speaker 5: I'm good and I'm not prepared for this.

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Speaker 2: Have you ever listened to the show before?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Well, if you've ever heard of or state follow up before,

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Speaker 1: that's the segment where if you end up ghosting somebody,

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Speaker 1: they can call us to get you on the phone

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Speaker 1: and ask why you're ghosting them. We got an email

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Speaker 1: about you, Chrissy.

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Speaker 5: Oh okay, any idea who you're ghosting that would be

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Speaker 5: wanting to figure out why? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: I kind of know who is it? This guy Russell Russell.

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Speaker 1: No, it's a guy named Jim you know Jim Ball. Yes,

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Speaker 1: it is Russell. Russell emailed us and said that he

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Speaker 1: went on date with you. He thought it was great,

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Speaker 1: he thought you were awesome, but now you're ghosting him

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Speaker 1: and he's wondering if you'll tell us why.

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Speaker 5: I mean it's kind of embarrassing for him, baby, both

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Speaker 5: of us.

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Speaker 1: Okay, would you mind just telling us a little bit

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Speaker 1: about it? He's really curious.

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Speaker 5: Okay. So it was the way he's sat sat Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Okay, what does that mean?

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Speaker 5: I mean, I know this sounds insane, but we were

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Speaker 5: at this like paint your own mug place, huh, and

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Speaker 5: he he just sat there for twenty minutes without moving

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Speaker 5: that flanking a totally statue esque.

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Speaker 2: So he just sat there like a statue. Yeah. Was

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Speaker 2: he talking at all? Or he was just quiet least

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Speaker 2: sitting there.

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Speaker 5: No, like totally in the zone, not speaking nothing, like

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Speaker 5: he was freaking me out?

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Speaker 2: Was he painting his mug yessed to be doing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, Like I'm picturing him stop painting his mug

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Speaker 1: and just staring off in his face very stiffly.

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Speaker 2: So he was, he was doing his mug.

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Speaker 1: But the way that he was sitting in like his demeanor,

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Speaker 1: what it creep you out or something?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? Yeah, definitely?

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Speaker 2: Was it like I'm sitting up super straight and frozen

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Speaker 2: or like kind of hunched over and frozen, Like did

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Speaker 2: he at least feel like he was frozen in a

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Speaker 2: comfortable position? What? I don't know because then it would

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Speaker 2: make you have like different you know, it.

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Speaker 5: Very uncomfortable, and that also freaked me out. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 5: she wasn't moving like at all. It was giving me

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Speaker 5: like low key serial killer vibe.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, well, i'd be curious to know if he

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Speaker 1: is one of those. We could just ask him, Chrissy,

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Speaker 1: Russell is on the phone and wants to talk to you.

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Speaker 1: Wait he is, Yes, he is Russell.

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Speaker 2: Hey, Chrissy. Yeah, Hey, are you moving Russell?

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Speaker 5: Now?

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Speaker 3: Sorry, I'm just I'm a little taken aback here. I'm

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Speaker 3: just like I'm finding it. It's a little weird. I'd

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Speaker 3: be ghosted over the fact that I put effort into

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Speaker 3: painting a mug.

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Speaker 2: I didn't even pick the mug place.

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Speaker 3: I just sort of thought like, okay, she cares about mugs,

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Speaker 3: and so I'm sitting.

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Speaker 2: There like making it not seem like I'm.

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Speaker 3: Making fun of the fact that we're painting these that

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Speaker 3: you wanted to paint.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, but we were on a date, like Harry schooted

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Speaker 5: to get.

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Speaker 3: To know me.

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Speaker 5: If you're just sitting there frozen painting a mug.

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Speaker 3: The whole time I was concentrating, It's it's called being

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Speaker 3: focused it was, you know, I was trying to make

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Speaker 3: this mug look like it was worthy of the date.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, but you look like you were buffering.

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Speaker 3: You went silent in there as well. I mean you

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Speaker 3: were trying to paint the perfect mug. On your side,

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Speaker 3: it seemed like, like, honestly, it seemed like you were

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Speaker 3: like writing your resignation letter to the universe.

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Speaker 2: Like we were in activity. I mean you weren't talking either.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, because I was sitting across from you, so I

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Speaker 5: figured I might as well just sit here and paint

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Speaker 5: my mug.

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Speaker 2: Due it sounds like a couple of kids in their

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Speaker 2: first date.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I mean I get that you were focusing on

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Speaker 3: the mug, but honestly, like I overheard you talking to

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Speaker 3: the lady from the wine bar and you were kind

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Speaker 3: of talking about me.

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Speaker 5: What no, my weapon.

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Speaker 3: You were talking about attracting the quiet guys and like

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Speaker 3: how they're the weird ones.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I was talking about you. I'm telling her

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Speaker 5: how you were quiet weirdo.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so that feels pretty aggressive.

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Speaker 3: We've just met and we were in the middle of

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Speaker 3: like making these mugs.

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Speaker 5: You know what, I'm really busy, So I'm going to

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Speaker 5: go now.

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Speaker 1: Oh, okay, Russell, Chrissy, now I have a good day.

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Speaker 2: I see why you liked her. I you know, I

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Speaker 2: gotta be honest.

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Speaker 3: I I thought doing an activity on a first date

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Speaker 3: was going to like bring about conversation. I did not

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Speaker 3: think it was going to create a level of uh,

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Speaker 3: you know, just like intensity from her.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't sound like this was a you thing, though, Russell.

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Speaker 1: It just sounds like, yeah, maybe something else is going

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Speaker 1: on there. She definitely didn't like your vibe when you

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Speaker 1: were paying the mug, that's for sure.

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Speaker 2: Maybe she was like painting.

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: You know what. The worst part is, I forgot the

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Speaker 2: mug at the wine bar, and you focus so hard.

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Speaker 2: It is the first thing.

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Speaker 1: So I have to ask, no matter what, Christy, would

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Speaker 1: you like to go on another date with Russell?

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Speaker 2: We'll pay for it. Oh no, thank you.

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Speaker 1: I'm not interested in another date with you wrestle, even

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Speaker 1: though I thought you were super sexy with the stubble

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Speaker 1: and all.

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Speaker 2: So she said no, sorry, Russell, How did you know

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Speaker 2: I hadn't shaved