WEBVTT - Lil Fine Shyt

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio

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<v Speaker 1>and the Black Effect Network.

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<v Speaker 2>We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up, y'all? It's your girl, AJ Holiday. What's up

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<v Speaker 1>Big Tam Bam?

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<v Speaker 2>Y'all, it's Tam Bam. I love y'all so so very much.

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<v Speaker 2>I love you to AJ. How you doing.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm fine, y'all.

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<v Speaker 2>We just got finished.

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<v Speaker 1>So that's why, bitch, I'm fine. I don't think we

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<v Speaker 1>should all the things bitch. I was outside Saturday.

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<v Speaker 2>It was cute too.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm posted my dress. Yeah I bought that dress.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh So let me back up a little bit. All right,

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<v Speaker 1>So y'all, there there are some elite black people in Charleston,

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<v Speaker 1>thank god. Okay, No, people be thinking Charleston just is

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<v Speaker 1>super ratchet. But this little crowd of people like from

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<v Speaker 1>age I don't know, like thirty five to thirty eight,

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<v Speaker 1>like they really be having shit going on here. So

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<v Speaker 1>don Lucci Prosecco and Rose is your first black owned

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<v Speaker 1>uh wine brand in South Carolina. Okay, Yeah, so they

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<v Speaker 1>had their Ruby the Ruby event this weekend, and I

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<v Speaker 1>did do like a little brief interview sweating late per usual.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm never really late. I'm gonna stop saying that. I

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<v Speaker 1>think I always be on time because I might have

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<v Speaker 1>missed the accident early. No, they got there when they

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<v Speaker 1>were supposed to, and.

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<v Speaker 2>I that's full shit, that's what way to look at it.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and I got there when I was supposed to

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<v Speaker 1>because I still got things done. But man, the shit

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<v Speaker 1>was outside. It was hot as fuck. But it was beautiful. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>it was so beautiful. And these men they pay attention

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<v Speaker 1>to the very small, intricate details of everything. The girl

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<v Speaker 1>they had caveat. They had pizza with their little brand.

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<v Speaker 1>Everything was branded, the candles, the pillows on the on

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<v Speaker 1>the sofas.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh.

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<v Speaker 1>They had somebody sitting there paint because it wasn't a museum,

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<v Speaker 1>the Gibbs Museum here in Charleston, so they had their

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<v Speaker 1>there are different. They got three different wines and champagne.

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<v Speaker 1>They had it like you know how you put in

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<v Speaker 1>like the glass case like a museum. It was so nice.

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<v Speaker 1>You go in the bathroom, they got the bottle with

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<v Speaker 1>the little lampshade on it, like like, how y'all know

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<v Speaker 1>to do this stuff? Everything smallest details? Yes, I love

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<v Speaker 1>that it was so nice, and yes, I had my

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<v Speaker 1>little dress on. Chak, I saw you I had it

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<v Speaker 1>was a couple of pounds for that dress because I

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<v Speaker 1>have bought that dress for in April to wear to

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<v Speaker 1>remember that movie premiere. I went to Miami. I bought

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<v Speaker 1>it to wear there. But the ship was too fucking

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<v Speaker 1>tight because that ship is one hundred percent cotton. It

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<v Speaker 1>ain't no stretch. It's either you getting in it and

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<v Speaker 1>there you're not. Yes, And I got in there. I

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<v Speaker 1>got in there. I don't pull some pictures. And then

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<v Speaker 1>we went out Sunday. We went for brunch Sunday.

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<v Speaker 2>Sitting up so good. You haven't it didn't.

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<v Speaker 1>Look like nothing, girl, girl, I almost put a brawn.

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<v Speaker 1>I glad I didn't boy, because that would have been milking.

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<v Speaker 1>And I had ship on underneath that dress. Nothing.

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<v Speaker 2>I think like since I lost weight, I lost titties too,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I just think I need a boy.

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<v Speaker 1>So at this point, leave them titties alone, because I know,

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<v Speaker 1>you know people who have since gotten them titties removed.

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<v Speaker 2>I just up at the top, like it's all sitting up.

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<v Speaker 1>We'll get the fat transferred to the titty down't see

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<v Speaker 1>how long that last? Instead, I wonder if I get

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<v Speaker 1>my back exactly. My homegirl had got her body done

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<v Speaker 1>in Saint Louis a long time ago, very like whoever

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<v Speaker 1>she wants to. If I get some shit done, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>flying to Saint Louis because it was like very very natural.

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<v Speaker 2>Because I want something. I put my fat in my

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<v Speaker 2>titty because.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't get titties though. So what her doctor told

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<v Speaker 1>her is that all of all the women, the white women,

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<v Speaker 1>all want the fat put into their titties, and all

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<v Speaker 1>the all the black women want the fat put in

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<v Speaker 1>their ass. So she got the fat to the ass. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>so she ain't get no titties.

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<v Speaker 2>Take my back, put it in my boots.

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<v Speaker 1>And if you need some extra fat, I'll don't how

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<v Speaker 1>big you want them.

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<v Speaker 2>I just want I don't even want bigger titties because

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<v Speaker 2>I don't want big titties. I just don't want like

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<v Speaker 2>they just all my girth is at the bottom. It's

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<v Speaker 2>just like a slope, like a beginner's ice skin slope.

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<v Speaker 2>You go flat across the top and then like a

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<v Speaker 2>little cuppage at the bottom. I hate that. So I

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<v Speaker 2>can't fill out of dress. I can't like it's so

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<v Speaker 2>weird because dresses, like, because I'm so bottom heavy like

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<v Speaker 2>the top, they'll assume that you got something up top,

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<v Speaker 2>so it just be like empty in the top and

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<v Speaker 2>like real full at the bottom.

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<v Speaker 1>That little stuff it.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't it's too tight at the bottom. We'll struggle with that.

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<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm. But that was my outside. I was outside

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<v Speaker 1>all weekend, y'all. We did a Sunday fun Day brunch

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<v Speaker 1>from I was outside from one to eight on a Sunday.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh you was outside this week? Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Now I'm recuperating, bitch, I've been fasten. I'm not eating

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<v Speaker 1>until Thursday. This watering the water fast. So yeah, don't

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<v Speaker 1>be getting my nerves. That was the first thing I said.

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<v Speaker 1>It's like, girl, I'm like really like texting you back,

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<v Speaker 1>like I haven't ate. I'm gonna need you to get

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<v Speaker 1>off my nuts because don't y'all sucking hung Im about

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<v Speaker 1>to take a bite out of crime.

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<v Speaker 2>If someone saying can you send that a SAP, does

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<v Speaker 2>that mean right then or does that mean as soon

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<v Speaker 2>as possible? I thought, as yeah, let us know what

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<v Speaker 2>y'all think. Somebody say I need this a SAP versus

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<v Speaker 2>can you send that as soon as possible? Afterny for

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<v Speaker 2>as soon as possible.

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<v Speaker 1>Which one y'all prefer. Don't tell me to do shiit

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<v Speaker 1>asap because I can't.

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<v Speaker 2>I can't do nothing A sap sandwich, that's a problem.

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<v Speaker 2>You had to say what She would have just read

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<v Speaker 2>that and be like cool. But because she was hungry,

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<v Speaker 2>it was all like crazy.

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<v Speaker 1>Or because I had a lot of shit to do.

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<v Speaker 2>So listen, my weekend. It was my besties dad's seventy

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<v Speaker 2>seventy seventy. I can't seventieth birthday say that shit to

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<v Speaker 2>save my life just now. And they were supposed to

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<v Speaker 2>go to New Orleans and all the flights out of

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<v Speaker 2>Charlotte got canceled from for a storm. It was like bad,

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<v Speaker 2>Like the airport was just crazy.

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<v Speaker 1>It was raining.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it was just lightning storm.

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<v Speaker 1>That's crazy. It's been happening over the whole country. One

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<v Speaker 1>of my people in Texas was saying they had an

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<v Speaker 1>electrical storm, Like so shit was going out because of

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<v Speaker 1>the thunder and the lightning.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't raining, It wasn't. It was

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<v Speaker 2>just like the real sharp So they just couldn't fly

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<v Speaker 2>and like a couple of my clients got grounded. They

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<v Speaker 2>were going to New Orleans, my friend her and her bad.

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<v Speaker 2>So we was like, we want to still make his

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<v Speaker 2>birthday a good one. So we took him to this

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<v Speaker 2>restaurant in Charlick called Deluxe Fun Dining where the food

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<v Speaker 2>comes out on like all these crazy trays and smoke

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<v Speaker 2>and like different stuff. And we started we were drinking,

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<v Speaker 2>taking shots, and this man could drink. I like, I

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<v Speaker 2>haven't been drinking in a long time. And last week

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<v Speaker 2>when I could drink, I just had me like an

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<v Speaker 2>espresso martini. You know, I didn't really like go crazy,

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<v Speaker 2>but Saturday I had four shots of tequila. When I

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<v Speaker 2>tell you, I was down bad Sunday and Monday, like

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<v Speaker 2>so bad yesterday that my blood pressure was one one

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<v Speaker 2>ten over fifty eight.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh hell no, bitch, I was so dehydrated. That was

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<v Speaker 1>so dehydrated and need to go get some PDA.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah I did, I did. I got me. I got

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<v Speaker 2>a watermelon and I ate a whole watermelon and I

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<v Speaker 2>drank four bottles of water in Apedia, like just to

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<v Speaker 2>get myself back together. But yeah, that was my weekend.

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<v Speaker 2>We turned up for his seventy years.

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<v Speaker 1>That's fun.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was a good time. But I don't think

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<v Speaker 2>I like liquor no more. I think I'm done with liquor.

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<v Speaker 1>That's not my homegirl. She just had a baby, and

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<v Speaker 1>she was like, I don't think I'm a drink no more.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I don't even miss it, Like why I'm drinking.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, yeah, it is poison, you know. I'm always

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<v Speaker 1>consciously aware of what it is that I'm partaking in,

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<v Speaker 1>and every time I drink, I'd be like, man, I'm

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<v Speaker 1>just poisoning my body. And that's why I don't drink often.

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<v Speaker 1>I might go outside five times a year for real,

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<v Speaker 1>five six times a year, So I'm drinking five or

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<v Speaker 1>six times for real, like aside from like a vaca.

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<v Speaker 1>If I go on vacation, I'm drinking. If I go

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<v Speaker 1>like outside a Saturday, I might have one or two drinks.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't indulge that often, and when I do, I

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<v Speaker 1>be fucked up the next day. Luckily, I ain't drink

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<v Speaker 1>nothing on Sunday, but I did drink a little bit

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<v Speaker 1>on Saturday, and luckily I was all right.

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<v Speaker 2>Luckily, me, me and my best friend get together. We

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<v Speaker 2>just be fu like.

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<v Speaker 1>It's just fun. I want to be loud and cussing

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<v Speaker 1>and talking loud like I don't want to be sober.

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<v Speaker 1>Everybody else drunk because nah, I'm like.

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<v Speaker 2>Mad, irritated. Yeah, y'all are ignorant, you know, but that

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<v Speaker 2>was my weekend and now I'm finally getting back. I

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<v Speaker 2>couldn't even go to the gym yesterday, y'all. It was

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<v Speaker 2>so bad, Like my doctor was like, if you try

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<v Speaker 2>to go to the gym with this blood person right now,

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<v Speaker 2>you might faint. Just stay home, drink water and put

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<v Speaker 2>your feet up. So yeah, that's what I did. But

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going today to this evening.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's getting the sins they doe. So apparently female frogs

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<v Speaker 1>take their death to avoid meeting with males they don't

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<v Speaker 1>find attractive.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not just us, it's not us.

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<v Speaker 1>The only difference is if we fake our fucking death,

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<v Speaker 1>the nigga stole might come and try to hump on

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<v Speaker 1>your ass, right.

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<v Speaker 2>They like they're talking, full body limp, floating upside down,

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<v Speaker 2>even holding their breath. It's the ultimate ghost move for

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<v Speaker 2>a frog, like I'm dead. I'm dead.

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<v Speaker 1>Now, I did that in a relationship now, pretending like

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sleep like we get in might that I'm planning

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<v Speaker 1>to have sex and all that shit I done changed

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<v Speaker 1>my my mind by the time we get home, Like

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<v Speaker 1>I'm I'm pretend sleeping hard as hell.

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<v Speaker 2>I definitely pretended to be sick to not have to

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<v Speaker 2>do it. I ain't think i'mna rock bucket.

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<v Speaker 1>When it becomes a job, I gotta get out of there.

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<v Speaker 1>When it becomes a job, I gotta get out of there.

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<v Speaker 1>Like we gotta do this.

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<v Speaker 2>Sometimes it just don't feel like it, you know.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and then you can't deprive your partner of sex.

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<v Speaker 1>But god, damn, I'm gonna just be acting like a frog.

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<v Speaker 2>Be dead.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm dead. That's our little kids be. I've then one

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<v Speaker 1>eye open. I'm dead now. They't gonna be like, OPI

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<v Speaker 1>your mouth.

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<v Speaker 2>They do not care.

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<v Speaker 1>We're dad man. They're still trying to hump on you.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm frogs.

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<v Speaker 2>Statistically, if you live in Utah, you're more likely to

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<v Speaker 2>get married than if you live anywhere else in the

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<v Speaker 2>United States. According to the CDC and Sisters dadd and

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<v Speaker 2>you Tak consistently ranks among the top states for marriage rates,

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<v Speaker 2>with over twenty one point nine marriages per one thousand women. Damn,

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<v Speaker 2>that's it, well above the national average. With culture, community values,

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<v Speaker 2>or early commitment norms. Utah makes marriage more common than

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<v Speaker 2>anywhere else. You know.

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<v Speaker 1>You sent this post to me and when I saw it,

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<v Speaker 1>I went to go google. Are people in Utah generally pretty?

0:11:58.800 --> 0:12:00.559
<v Speaker 1>And they actually? You know, because I was thinking, like,

0:12:00.600 --> 0:12:03.640
<v Speaker 1>you know, I started his post on Instagram one day

0:12:03.640 --> 0:12:05.400
<v Speaker 1>and I don't know what I can't remember what city

0:12:05.400 --> 0:12:08.920
<v Speaker 1>it was, but he was like, man, everybody in the

0:12:08.960 --> 0:12:09.640
<v Speaker 1>city ugly.

0:12:11.080 --> 0:12:12.839
<v Speaker 2>How about Columbia? So I'm Carolina.

0:12:13.080 --> 0:12:16.080
<v Speaker 1>No, Colombia is not ugly. People in Columbia are not ugly.

0:12:16.360 --> 0:12:18.240
<v Speaker 2>So but remember that man was like, yo, I'm in

0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:20.720
<v Speaker 2>Colombia and all these bitches is ugly and they ate

0:12:20.800 --> 0:12:21.240
<v Speaker 2>him up.

0:12:22.640 --> 0:12:26.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh we had him on the show, I remember. But meanwhile,

0:12:26.760 --> 0:12:31.360
<v Speaker 1>you're looking like, I don't know, doctor Umar reject, Like

0:12:31.640 --> 0:12:34.680
<v Speaker 1>you look like a doctor Umar reject, right, Like.

0:12:34.600 --> 0:12:36.600
<v Speaker 2>How do you do that? And they call it somebody ugly?

0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:40.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Columbia has very beautiful people. But I can't remember

0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:42.480
<v Speaker 1>what city this person was in, but he was just like,

0:12:42.720 --> 0:12:45.560
<v Speaker 1>I see why everybody coupled up here. Everybody ugly. So

0:12:45.640 --> 0:12:48.520
<v Speaker 1>that's what I was thinking about Utah. But apparently Utah

0:12:48.640 --> 0:12:51.160
<v Speaker 1>is like number twelve on the list for most beautiful people.

0:12:52.200 --> 0:12:53.920
<v Speaker 2>So maybe that's where I need to go. Looking from

0:12:53.960 --> 0:12:54.920
<v Speaker 2>our partner.

0:12:56.240 --> 0:13:02.400
<v Speaker 1>You gonna get your partner for sure, a partner in Utah.

0:13:02.520 --> 0:13:04.440
<v Speaker 1>I don't know who the fuck is living in Utah.

0:13:04.600 --> 0:13:06.920
<v Speaker 1>Maybe they got a good military base with some niggas

0:13:07.000 --> 0:13:15.360
<v Speaker 1>hidden over there. See about it, Yeah, Utah. So another

0:13:15.400 --> 0:13:18.720
<v Speaker 1>study shows by age thirty five, many women have stopped

0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:23.640
<v Speaker 1>chasing fairy tale expectations and instead they seek peace and

0:13:23.840 --> 0:13:27.959
<v Speaker 1>financial stability from their relationships. Study shows it says by

0:13:27.960 --> 0:13:30.880
<v Speaker 1>the time they reach their their mid thirties, a lot

0:13:30.920 --> 0:13:34.120
<v Speaker 1>of women begin to shift their focus away from intense, drama,

0:13:34.120 --> 0:13:39.920
<v Speaker 1>fhill passion passionate relationships and instead look for something more grounded, peace, stability,

0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:44.000
<v Speaker 1>and real partnership. After years of dating and going through

0:13:44.120 --> 0:13:47.880
<v Speaker 1>different phases of life, their outlook naturally matures. Instead of

0:13:47.960 --> 0:13:54.400
<v Speaker 1>chasing fleeting excitement, many now seek emotionally healthy connections, absolutely

0:13:54.920 --> 0:14:02.559
<v Speaker 1>strong compatibility, and financial dadiness. Okay, that is very important.

0:14:02.679 --> 0:14:05.000
<v Speaker 2>It's so funny because I was on the phone with

0:14:05.559 --> 0:14:10.679
<v Speaker 2>our producer Taylor yesterday and I was just talking about

0:14:11.320 --> 0:14:15.000
<v Speaker 2>this nigga ot and uh gave back to the streets

0:14:15.440 --> 0:14:18.200
<v Speaker 2>and she was like, you know, talking to me about

0:14:18.320 --> 0:14:22.120
<v Speaker 2>like the fairy don't you want the fairy tale? And

0:14:22.120 --> 0:14:24.360
<v Speaker 2>I was like, I don't believe in that no more.

0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:28.320
<v Speaker 2>And she was like I was like, girl, yes, I

0:14:28.360 --> 0:14:30.640
<v Speaker 2>don't believe in no fairy tale in it no more.

0:14:30.760 --> 0:14:33.280
<v Speaker 2>What I want is And it's so funny because the

0:14:33.320 --> 0:14:36.680
<v Speaker 2>things that are listening listen here is exactly what I said.

0:14:36.760 --> 0:14:39.040
<v Speaker 1>Let me finish up the things like. It says, things

0:14:39.080 --> 0:14:43.400
<v Speaker 1>like emotional intelligence, shared values, in common direction, and life

0:14:43.440 --> 0:14:45.360
<v Speaker 1>start to matter more than chemistry alone.

0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:47.920
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's why it's so funny you said this, because

0:14:47.960 --> 0:14:50.680
<v Speaker 2>I was just having that conversation like I don't need

0:14:50.720 --> 0:14:52.520
<v Speaker 2>all of that no more. I don't even want no

0:14:52.640 --> 0:14:56.760
<v Speaker 2>fine nigga, no more like fine, ben off the list

0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:59.440
<v Speaker 2>of what I want. I mean, don't get me wrong.

0:14:59.480 --> 0:15:02.600
<v Speaker 2>I take a but it's not on the top of.

0:15:02.880 --> 0:15:04.080
<v Speaker 1>You take a little fine shit.

0:15:04.880 --> 0:15:07.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah I was. I take a little five ship now.

0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:11.360
<v Speaker 1>But it says the change isn't about giving up or settling.

0:15:11.520 --> 0:15:15.120
<v Speaker 1>It's an intentional choice. Experts say that this shift is

0:15:15.160 --> 0:15:19.320
<v Speaker 1>influenced by everything from social excuse me, from societal pressure

0:15:19.560 --> 0:15:24.800
<v Speaker 1>and biological clocks to professional goals. So for many women,

0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:28.760
<v Speaker 1>it's about finding lasting happiness in a sense of security.

0:15:28.800 --> 0:15:32.160
<v Speaker 1>And I think that because women are, you know, putting

0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:35.400
<v Speaker 1>their happiness at the forefront. You don't a set a

0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:38.080
<v Speaker 1>lot of things, especially when you're happy with yourself like you,

0:15:38.480 --> 0:15:41.120
<v Speaker 1>then you know your self esteem is up. I say

0:15:41.120 --> 0:15:44.280
<v Speaker 1>this all the time. People date based on their self esteem. Recently,

0:15:45.800 --> 0:15:49.720
<v Speaker 1>Decisions Decisions is on the Breakfast Club, you know, and

0:15:49.760 --> 0:15:52.520
<v Speaker 1>we did one of our earlier shows with them, and

0:15:52.960 --> 0:15:55.240
<v Speaker 1>we talked about this and maybe on this episode, right,

0:15:55.640 --> 0:15:58.240
<v Speaker 1>maybe I don't know. On another episode we talked about

0:15:58.240 --> 0:16:00.960
<v Speaker 1>how that hole and don't heal like now older? Right,

0:16:01.480 --> 0:16:04.640
<v Speaker 1>we were older than them, obviously we're older than them,

0:16:04.680 --> 0:16:06.560
<v Speaker 1>but I was trying to tell them the future. Then

0:16:07.160 --> 0:16:10.640
<v Speaker 1>they didn't get it because they were still having fun outside. Right.

0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:12.960
<v Speaker 1>But you will come to a point where none of

0:16:13.000 --> 0:16:14.760
<v Speaker 1>this shit matters and you're gonna look back at your

0:16:14.760 --> 0:16:16.680
<v Speaker 1>old self, like, what the fuck was I doing? And

0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:18.440
<v Speaker 1>why the fuck was I fuck with these people? These

0:16:18.520 --> 0:16:21.920
<v Speaker 1>niggas can't now see my pussy today? Yeah, A J.

0:16:22.040 --> 0:16:24.760
<v Speaker 2>Asked me about this guy she saw at the party

0:16:25.600 --> 0:16:28.920
<v Speaker 2>that I used to date. She was like, remember that, God,

0:16:29.080 --> 0:16:31.920
<v Speaker 2>I was like who she was like describing him? And

0:16:31.960 --> 0:16:35.040
<v Speaker 2>I kept saying, who bitch, And she's like, are you serious?

0:16:35.120 --> 0:16:37.360
<v Speaker 2>Or you do you know who I'm talking about? I said, oh, bitch,

0:16:40.480 --> 0:16:40.800
<v Speaker 2>cause you.

0:16:40.880 --> 0:16:42.840
<v Speaker 1>Did that the last time I asked about that dude

0:16:42.880 --> 0:16:44.400
<v Speaker 1>because I saw him another time.

0:16:46.280 --> 0:16:47.080
<v Speaker 2>Who knows?

0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:53.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, man, So we started, like you know, you just

0:16:53.400 --> 0:16:57.880
<v Speaker 1>start prioritizing different things in life, Like you know, I

0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:00.760
<v Speaker 1>still want to find little shit because I don't have

0:17:00.840 --> 0:17:03.480
<v Speaker 1>any kids. I want to make sure I got a

0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:06.560
<v Speaker 1>super fine kid. You know, I'm not that selfish.

0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:08.199
<v Speaker 2>I don't care about fine.

0:17:08.960 --> 0:17:09.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't care.

0:17:10.359 --> 0:17:13.600
<v Speaker 2>I don't want no ugly ass nigga, but I don't

0:17:13.640 --> 0:17:15.200
<v Speaker 2>want I don't care about him.

0:17:15.280 --> 0:17:18.360
<v Speaker 1>You gotta be fine to me. Yeah, to me, that's

0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:20.800
<v Speaker 1>all that matters. I don't revamp my whole LOWD list,

0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:23.720
<v Speaker 1>right the things I'm trying to manifest in a partner.

0:17:24.920 --> 0:17:27.119
<v Speaker 2>I care more about fitness now than the.

0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:31.040
<v Speaker 1>Fine exactly exactly. I get on my ass, let's go

0:17:31.080 --> 0:17:34.160
<v Speaker 1>to the gym, let's do all the things. And then also,

0:17:34.359 --> 0:17:36.399
<v Speaker 1>you know, what's really important to me is like diet,

0:17:36.680 --> 0:17:39.560
<v Speaker 1>because I don't feel like having to cook somebody something different,

0:17:39.960 --> 0:17:42.920
<v Speaker 1>like I need people to be on my diet. I'm sorry,

0:17:43.080 --> 0:17:45.240
<v Speaker 1>and it's people out there on my same diets where

0:17:45.240 --> 0:17:48.600
<v Speaker 1>I don't got to touch chicken for them or touch

0:17:48.640 --> 0:17:50.960
<v Speaker 1>a piece of steak. They gonna eat. What the fuck

0:17:51.000 --> 0:17:53.120
<v Speaker 1>I eat? I need a little baby, ask and listen.

0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:56.280
<v Speaker 2>Because I want a piece of steak, give.

0:17:56.160 --> 0:17:58.240
<v Speaker 1>Me, Well, you go out and get it. I shouldn't

0:17:58.280 --> 0:18:01.159
<v Speaker 1>have to touch it, because it's more real spiritual for me,

0:18:01.320 --> 0:18:04.360
<v Speaker 1>like the consumption of meat. I don't want to shit.

0:18:04.440 --> 0:18:07.360
<v Speaker 1>I'm leaning towards like I'm trying to really stop eating seafood,

0:18:07.359 --> 0:18:10.560
<v Speaker 1>but it's just so hard because I'm a fishead from Charleston,

0:18:10.640 --> 0:18:12.840
<v Speaker 1>South Carolina. It's hard for me not to eat seafood,

0:18:12.880 --> 0:18:14.120
<v Speaker 1>but I'm do it one day.

0:18:14.320 --> 0:18:16.480
<v Speaker 2>You're a chickenhead. I don't know how this hample to you.

0:18:16.720 --> 0:18:19.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm a fish head. You a chicken head. I don't

0:18:19.880 --> 0:18:24.440
<v Speaker 1>know what you what y'all got in Columbia? What Columbia got?

0:18:24.640 --> 0:18:25.200
<v Speaker 2>What do you mean?

0:18:25.760 --> 0:18:29.040
<v Speaker 1>Like? What is Columbia like known for aside from being

0:18:29.080 --> 0:18:29.640
<v Speaker 1>the capital.

0:18:30.920 --> 0:18:34.320
<v Speaker 2>I was just thinking the Confederate flagshit, Like what y'all

0:18:34.400 --> 0:18:35.040
<v Speaker 2>got the flag?

0:18:37.160 --> 0:18:40.400
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck else is going on Columbia? Like esthetically

0:18:40.480 --> 0:18:43.280
<v Speaker 1>don't even look good? Like I just always was depressed.

0:18:43.960 --> 0:18:46.800
<v Speaker 1>The landscape isn't nice.

0:18:48.080 --> 0:18:52.040
<v Speaker 2>There's shining faces and beautiful places.

0:18:53.200 --> 0:18:55.240
<v Speaker 1>Like, what the fuck is the trees and the flowers?

0:18:55.240 --> 0:18:57.400
<v Speaker 1>And shit? We got palm trees and Charleston.

0:18:57.520 --> 0:18:59.960
<v Speaker 2>Okay, where is the Yeah, where is the palmtal tree

0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:03.400
<v Speaker 2>that they always talking about on the flag? Y'all?

0:19:03.480 --> 0:19:05.240
<v Speaker 1>Damn in the middle of the state. Y'all ain't got nothing.

0:19:05.280 --> 0:19:06.160
<v Speaker 1>Y'all ain't by the water.

0:19:06.600 --> 0:19:10.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, speaking a little fine shit, let's get into it.

0:19:10.600 --> 0:19:18.640
<v Speaker 2>We'll be right back. I ain't seen aj Sis April

0:19:18.760 --> 0:19:21.280
<v Speaker 2>in person, like we get together. We record every week,

0:19:21.320 --> 0:19:24.880
<v Speaker 2>but it's been audio. We're back filming. As soon as

0:19:24.880 --> 0:19:26.639
<v Speaker 2>she walks in the door, she don't even say hi

0:19:26.720 --> 0:19:27.160
<v Speaker 2>to me. Y'all.

0:19:27.200 --> 0:19:31.040
<v Speaker 1>She says, you look like a dyke. I said a

0:19:31.080 --> 0:19:33.680
<v Speaker 1>little bit more high pitched though, Like nice though.

0:19:34.400 --> 0:19:35.360
<v Speaker 2>Say how you said it?

0:19:35.440 --> 0:19:36.160
<v Speaker 1>You ain't a dyke.

0:19:39.880 --> 0:19:42.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm chilling. It's a big chilling vibes.

0:19:42.119 --> 0:19:45.040
<v Speaker 1>It's hot. We don't never coordinate. That's a problem. See,

0:19:45.040 --> 0:19:46.879
<v Speaker 1>i'd be oneing like maybe I should have this on

0:19:46.960 --> 0:19:49.280
<v Speaker 1>my wrists, right, So you want to dress alike, not

0:19:49.400 --> 0:19:53.800
<v Speaker 1>dress alike, but coordinate, like we really like two different people. Yeah,

0:19:53.880 --> 0:19:56.280
<v Speaker 1>I know, but we can still like be cohesive a

0:19:56.320 --> 0:19:57.680
<v Speaker 1>little bit. You know, that's my favorite.

0:19:57.920 --> 0:20:02.760
<v Speaker 2>We are cohesive this I only packed dress one hundred

0:20:02.840 --> 0:20:04.080
<v Speaker 2>thousand degrees outside.

0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:06.000
<v Speaker 1>You got a sweat past, So what are we talking about?

0:20:06.200 --> 0:20:08.760
<v Speaker 1>That's all I got loose. I thought you had just

0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:11.080
<v Speaker 1>off the road or something. Let's let's get in a

0:20:11.200 --> 0:20:13.240
<v Speaker 1>five shy month. It's pride month.

0:20:14.400 --> 0:20:16.840
<v Speaker 2>It is shout out the prime month. But I'm not gay.

0:20:17.720 --> 0:20:22.560
<v Speaker 2>But I love him today because it's Sunday. Other than

0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:25.720
<v Speaker 2>that that asked me, I am not those promote that,

0:20:25.880 --> 0:20:26.560
<v Speaker 2>all right, I won't.

0:20:26.600 --> 0:20:29.280
<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry anyway, y'll you know what I want to

0:20:29.320 --> 0:20:32.200
<v Speaker 1>talk about today because I am having a lot of

0:20:32.560 --> 0:20:34.679
<v Speaker 1>I feel like we both right, alright, we have a

0:20:34.680 --> 0:20:38.879
<v Speaker 1>lot of transitioning going on in life right now. And

0:20:39.000 --> 0:20:46.399
<v Speaker 1>y'all know we like real young too. But I don't know,

0:20:46.480 --> 0:20:49.680
<v Speaker 1>I feel like at this age, you still end up

0:20:49.720 --> 0:20:54.320
<v Speaker 1>in these these situationships with people. I know.

0:20:56.720 --> 0:21:00.480
<v Speaker 2>Listen, the last ten years, it's been a see all

0:21:00.520 --> 0:21:04.600
<v Speaker 2>of them. I haven't had like a solid that's my man,

0:21:04.720 --> 0:21:08.560
<v Speaker 2>my man and my man. No, it's been situationships.

0:21:08.800 --> 0:21:11.919
<v Speaker 1>I haven't had a situationship in a long time. I

0:21:12.000 --> 0:21:17.280
<v Speaker 1>always end up in relationships. But I'm like, do I

0:21:17.320 --> 0:21:18.560
<v Speaker 1>need it a situationship?

0:21:19.040 --> 0:21:22.200
<v Speaker 2>I think yeah, I think you should like calm down

0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:26.160
<v Speaker 2>on claiming a nigga so quick.

0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:28.560
<v Speaker 1>At this age, at this young age.

0:21:28.320 --> 0:21:30.840
<v Speaker 2>Because you just need to I like, just see what

0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:31.879
<v Speaker 2>it is, you know.

0:21:31.960 --> 0:21:35.399
<v Speaker 1>I don't thought that type of time but for the

0:21:35.480 --> 0:21:38.520
<v Speaker 1>younger folks. But I feel like we at this nice age,

0:21:38.560 --> 0:21:43.400
<v Speaker 1>we still end up in situationships. And what qualifies as

0:21:43.400 --> 0:21:50.119
<v Speaker 1>a situationship in today's dating whatever we got going.

0:21:49.880 --> 0:21:53.199
<v Speaker 2>On, So chat GPT did not answer the question for us,

0:21:53.400 --> 0:21:54.720
<v Speaker 2>So let me tell you what I think.

0:21:55.040 --> 0:21:55.399
<v Speaker 1>Listen.

0:21:55.960 --> 0:22:02.600
<v Speaker 2>I think a situationship is a relationship without any real

0:22:02.720 --> 0:22:07.959
<v Speaker 2>boundaries or parameters or like title. That's all the situationship is.

0:22:08.200 --> 0:22:10.480
<v Speaker 2>Y'all in a relationship, but y'all don't give it a title.

0:22:11.960 --> 0:22:15.439
<v Speaker 1>So my definition of situationship because one person is probably

0:22:15.440 --> 0:22:18.760
<v Speaker 1>in a relationship. Any other person is in a situationship.

0:22:18.880 --> 0:22:22.600
<v Speaker 1>A lot of times when people start labeling things as

0:22:23.080 --> 0:22:26.280
<v Speaker 1>a situationship, one person usually doesn't know where they are

0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:29.399
<v Speaker 1>and they want to be in a relationship, but the

0:22:29.480 --> 0:22:33.240
<v Speaker 1>other person is essentially putting them into a situationship.

0:22:34.800 --> 0:22:37.919
<v Speaker 2>No, they're not committing It depends It depends because it

0:22:37.920 --> 0:22:41.040
<v Speaker 2>could be like two single people, or it could be

0:22:41.440 --> 0:22:45.160
<v Speaker 2>one single person and want somebody that's in a relationship already,

0:22:45.880 --> 0:22:48.000
<v Speaker 2>or it could be somebody in jail, it is somebody

0:22:48.040 --> 0:22:50.159
<v Speaker 2>free like, it could be all kinds of things that

0:22:50.200 --> 0:22:53.280
<v Speaker 2>make it a situationship. And that's why they don't put

0:22:53.280 --> 0:22:56.680
<v Speaker 2>a title on it, because they can't or they don't

0:22:56.720 --> 0:22:57.120
<v Speaker 2>want to.

0:22:58.080 --> 0:23:01.040
<v Speaker 1>I think oftentimes one already wants to put a tie

0:23:01.119 --> 0:23:04.199
<v Speaker 1>on it, right. I think sometimes people are escaping like

0:23:04.320 --> 0:23:08.240
<v Speaker 1>having to be like really like intimate, you know, having

0:23:08.240 --> 0:23:11.360
<v Speaker 1>to express real intimacy with somebody, So they put them

0:23:11.359 --> 0:23:15.320
<v Speaker 1>in this situation box where they're left in limbo and

0:23:15.440 --> 0:23:17.320
<v Speaker 1>don't really know if they're in a relationship with this

0:23:17.359 --> 0:23:20.040
<v Speaker 1>person not. But y'all doing all the things. See, I

0:23:20.080 --> 0:23:25.360
<v Speaker 1>went from a city, yes bitch, you are, and I

0:23:25.440 --> 0:23:30.040
<v Speaker 1>literally went from a situationship straight into an engagement. And

0:23:30.160 --> 0:23:34.080
<v Speaker 1>this person really didn't consider us being in a relationship

0:23:34.440 --> 0:23:36.520
<v Speaker 1>until he gave me a ring. Does that make sense?

0:23:36.560 --> 0:23:40.040
<v Speaker 1>Anybody that's manipulation, right, that's retarded?

0:23:40.760 --> 0:23:42.160
<v Speaker 2>Can I say that, Yes?

0:23:42.240 --> 0:23:44.960
<v Speaker 1>You can? Trump is president, you can stay retarded. Okay,

0:23:45.560 --> 0:23:49.040
<v Speaker 1>that's just hated. But it left me feeling like, am

0:23:49.040 --> 0:23:52.359
<v Speaker 1>I tripping? Like because in his mind, I believe he

0:23:52.440 --> 0:23:55.919
<v Speaker 1>thinks because you know, he didn't have to be he

0:23:55.920 --> 0:23:58.639
<v Speaker 1>doesn't have to be accountable the things he did prior

0:23:58.760 --> 0:24:02.200
<v Speaker 1>to the engagement, right, all the fucked up things. We

0:24:02.480 --> 0:24:05.119
<v Speaker 1>really wasn't together when that happened, but we was building

0:24:05.160 --> 0:24:09.840
<v Speaker 1>businesses that we were absolutely together. So this is why

0:24:09.880 --> 0:24:14.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying. Oftentimes one person is in a relationship, they

0:24:15.359 --> 0:24:19.200
<v Speaker 1>define the thing that they have going on as a relationship,

0:24:19.760 --> 0:24:23.200
<v Speaker 1>but the other person gets to say, well, I just

0:24:23.480 --> 0:24:24.159
<v Speaker 1>real murky.

0:24:25.600 --> 0:24:29.879
<v Speaker 2>I prefer I have been known to prefer.

0:24:31.040 --> 0:24:34.560
<v Speaker 1>A situationship. No, I don't prefer. I don't like me

0:24:35.000 --> 0:24:36.000
<v Speaker 1>is just so boxed.

0:24:36.080 --> 0:24:38.400
<v Speaker 2>It has been so boxed in for me, I start

0:24:38.440 --> 0:24:41.920
<v Speaker 2>feeling like claustrophobic and like I can't breathe.

0:24:44.480 --> 0:24:46.400
<v Speaker 1>You know, maybe I'd be like that too, And that's

0:24:46.400 --> 0:24:49.840
<v Speaker 1>why it's just it's almost like at two years, I

0:24:49.880 --> 0:24:53.080
<v Speaker 1>get kind of antsy mm hmm, I get kind of like.

0:24:55.920 --> 0:24:58.680
<v Speaker 2>So you start feeling like you're ready to leave? Yes,

0:24:58.800 --> 0:25:01.280
<v Speaker 2>I start feeling stuff, That's what I'm saying. Like I

0:25:01.320 --> 0:25:06.040
<v Speaker 2>started as soon as we start talking about like being exclusive,

0:25:06.320 --> 0:25:08.880
<v Speaker 2>That's when I start feeling like and it's just just.

0:25:08.960 --> 0:25:11.439
<v Speaker 1>Way before two years at least, I'm in the relationship

0:25:11.440 --> 0:25:14.080
<v Speaker 1>and you're feeling stuffy. You like, soon then they can

0:25:14.119 --> 0:25:15.920
<v Speaker 1>start talking about a relationship about it, and.

0:25:16.440 --> 0:25:19.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, what do you think that's about?

0:25:19.240 --> 0:25:23.399
<v Speaker 1>Though we already talked about this, Timmy, you like the

0:25:23.520 --> 0:25:26.800
<v Speaker 1>unavailability of people. I think you know what I'm saying.

0:25:26.960 --> 0:25:31.440
<v Speaker 1>So I don't know, and I might also I might

0:25:31.480 --> 0:25:33.480
<v Speaker 1>be the same way, right, but I'll stay in a

0:25:33.520 --> 0:25:35.639
<v Speaker 1>thing a little bit longer than you do.

0:25:36.119 --> 0:25:38.440
<v Speaker 2>But that's not true. I just don't put a name

0:25:38.520 --> 0:25:38.840
<v Speaker 2>on it.

0:25:39.280 --> 0:25:39.880
<v Speaker 1>That's a fact.

0:25:41.000 --> 0:25:43.160
<v Speaker 2>I just don't put a title on it. I just

0:25:43.760 --> 0:25:46.440
<v Speaker 2>I struggle with that. Once we start putting titles on it,

0:25:46.440 --> 0:25:49.159
<v Speaker 2>it just starts getting that's so masculine of me. I

0:25:49.160 --> 0:25:52.159
<v Speaker 2>feel like, though, I feel like that's that's something a

0:25:52.200 --> 0:25:54.920
<v Speaker 2>man would say and not a woman. Typically a woman

0:25:55.000 --> 0:25:57.760
<v Speaker 2>is the one who's like, but this has been my

0:25:57.960 --> 0:26:01.320
<v Speaker 2>entire life, every like serious with relationship I've ever had.

0:26:01.760 --> 0:26:06.680
<v Speaker 2>I was given an ultimatum commit olie. Yeah.

0:26:07.160 --> 0:26:10.000
<v Speaker 1>Interesting the two times I always tell you you a

0:26:10.080 --> 0:26:15.120
<v Speaker 1>boy and here you are Elliott shirts.

0:26:15.119 --> 0:26:18.040
<v Speaker 2>So what sweaty is? And I feel comfortable?

0:26:19.160 --> 0:26:19.600
<v Speaker 1>Fuck that.

0:26:21.560 --> 0:26:23.440
<v Speaker 2>All right, So why are they so common now? Because

0:26:23.440 --> 0:26:23.960
<v Speaker 2>I feel like.

0:26:25.520 --> 0:26:28.159
<v Speaker 1>I think social media and dating apps, you know what

0:26:28.200 --> 0:26:30.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying, Like it's just hook up. It's just like

0:26:30.880 --> 0:26:35.679
<v Speaker 1>a hook up society essentially now, Like people are so

0:26:35.880 --> 0:26:39.679
<v Speaker 1>people think everybody's just so replaceable, Like Instagram is a

0:26:39.680 --> 0:26:42.600
<v Speaker 1>whole holo dex So the minute this one act up,

0:26:42.640 --> 0:26:45.200
<v Speaker 1>you can just go in there and scroll scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll,

0:26:46.000 --> 0:26:48.040
<v Speaker 1>throw the fishing line out there and see who catch.

0:26:48.840 --> 0:26:51.600
<v Speaker 2>I enjoyed the variety of new people, but I don't

0:26:51.640 --> 0:26:54.359
<v Speaker 2>want to have sex with them. Like if I could

0:26:54.400 --> 0:26:57.720
<v Speaker 2>have like multiple boyfriends that I didn't have to sleep with,

0:26:58.280 --> 0:27:01.399
<v Speaker 2>that would be ideal for me because I enjoy like

0:27:01.480 --> 0:27:06.119
<v Speaker 2>the company. I enjoy the perspective of new people, but

0:27:06.200 --> 0:27:08.159
<v Speaker 2>I just don't want everybody did.

0:27:09.440 --> 0:27:13.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you know, we talk about nominogamy and polygamy and

0:27:13.800 --> 0:27:15.600
<v Speaker 1>all those things. I just don't know. How do you

0:27:15.720 --> 0:27:19.439
<v Speaker 1>how do you learn? Right if you are restricted to

0:27:19.520 --> 0:27:21.919
<v Speaker 1>this same person for the rest of your life, Like,

0:27:21.960 --> 0:27:25.520
<v Speaker 1>how do you get new information and new ideas? You

0:27:25.560 --> 0:27:28.119
<v Speaker 1>know what I'm saying, Because some things have to come

0:27:28.320 --> 0:27:31.919
<v Speaker 1>with a little bit more intimacy, Like some conversations you

0:27:32.000 --> 0:27:32.919
<v Speaker 1>might have with people.

0:27:33.280 --> 0:27:36.720
<v Speaker 2>But then there's something beautiful about finding that one person.

0:27:36.920 --> 0:27:39.439
<v Speaker 1>You know nothing about that. I said, it's one of us.

0:27:42.640 --> 0:27:46.320
<v Speaker 2>I said, there's something beautiful about I've seen it, you know,

0:27:46.480 --> 0:27:51.720
<v Speaker 2>like growing finding that one person and y'all grow old together,

0:27:52.800 --> 0:27:56.440
<v Speaker 2>and then that's beautiful. Like I like my ex boyfriends.

0:27:56.520 --> 0:27:59.560
<v Speaker 2>Aren't her and her husband they're in the cutest thing.

0:27:59.640 --> 0:28:02.240
<v Speaker 2>I haven't seen him in a while, but they're still together.

0:28:02.800 --> 0:28:06.199
<v Speaker 2>He still get jealous, like he still love her so

0:28:06.280 --> 0:28:08.520
<v Speaker 2>much and she loved him, and they're so cute. You know,

0:28:09.080 --> 0:28:11.119
<v Speaker 2>that's so cute. But I just feel like it's hard

0:28:11.160 --> 0:28:12.240
<v Speaker 2>to come by that now.

0:28:13.119 --> 0:28:13.560
<v Speaker 1>They know.

0:28:13.640 --> 0:28:17.600
<v Speaker 2>Ever since listen, since Remy and past Poos broke up,

0:28:17.680 --> 0:28:20.080
<v Speaker 2>I just feel like everybody do.

0:28:21.320 --> 0:28:23.600
<v Speaker 1>Man. They definitely I thought that was.

0:28:23.600 --> 0:28:25.399
<v Speaker 2>Gonna stay again as that could stay, huh.

0:28:25.440 --> 0:28:28.040
<v Speaker 1>It was definitely never a couple, not a couple of goals,

0:28:28.080 --> 0:28:30.880
<v Speaker 1>but like out of prison, that's all he did.

0:28:32.680 --> 0:28:36.479
<v Speaker 2>I just thought they were like very like urban and

0:28:36.560 --> 0:28:40.280
<v Speaker 2>cute and like locked in with each other no matter what.

0:28:40.880 --> 0:28:43.720
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Mike like Ahs like the Hardships, my

0:28:43.880 --> 0:28:47.080
<v Speaker 1>ultimate like ghetto love story love couple. I like Gucci

0:28:47.120 --> 0:28:51.200
<v Speaker 1>Maine and Kishi Kor, Like I felt like they established like, oh,

0:28:51.280 --> 0:28:53.600
<v Speaker 1>niggas about to start getting married. Gucci don't got married.

0:28:54.400 --> 0:28:56.120
<v Speaker 1>May are about this black men are about to start

0:28:56.120 --> 0:29:00.080
<v Speaker 1>guessing an example more because Gucci main got married and

0:29:00.120 --> 0:29:01.760
<v Speaker 1>to glow up, you know what I'm saying, Like he

0:29:01.840 --> 0:29:04.920
<v Speaker 1>came home a whole nother person. Some people think literally.

0:29:04.680 --> 0:29:09.200
<v Speaker 2>He was not himself, but yeah, okay, that's a good example.

0:29:10.760 --> 0:29:15.719
<v Speaker 2>But they were similar, maybe not as glamorous as Keisha

0:29:15.800 --> 0:29:21.160
<v Speaker 2>Kor and Gucci, but like just a beautiful urban couple.

0:29:21.440 --> 0:29:26.480
<v Speaker 1>That was locked in. No, I don't like that word urban.

0:29:27.720 --> 0:29:33.840
<v Speaker 2>I'm just trying to be like carrag so niggas, so

0:29:33.920 --> 0:29:35.920
<v Speaker 2>niggas that was locked in with each other, and I

0:29:36.000 --> 0:29:39.680
<v Speaker 2>just I enjoyed the seeing that. And it wasn't the

0:29:39.680 --> 0:29:41.600
<v Speaker 2>man that went to jail. It was the woman. That's

0:29:41.640 --> 0:29:44.680
<v Speaker 2>what made it different. You know, like he held her

0:29:44.760 --> 0:29:46.160
<v Speaker 2>down while she was in jail.

0:29:46.440 --> 0:29:47.960
<v Speaker 1>And that's why I feel like a lot of men

0:29:48.000 --> 0:29:50.200
<v Speaker 1>probably don't have respect for Pappus. You see all the

0:29:50.320 --> 0:29:53.640
<v Speaker 1>jokes online. It's like he like he's the woman and

0:29:53.680 --> 0:29:57.240
<v Speaker 1>he likes these tough He likes tough women, you know

0:29:57.240 --> 0:30:00.320
<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying. So do he like tough women for

0:30:00.400 --> 0:30:02.680
<v Speaker 1>a man to be just your woman is in prison

0:30:02.720 --> 0:30:05.400
<v Speaker 1>for shooting somebody, like you didn't do that type of time.

0:30:05.440 --> 0:30:08.360
<v Speaker 1>Your girl didn't and you waited for her like that

0:30:08.520 --> 0:30:08.880
<v Speaker 1>is what.

0:30:10.600 --> 0:30:13.400
<v Speaker 2>You waited for her, Like you said it like very

0:30:13.560 --> 0:30:15.440
<v Speaker 2>like that's condescending of him.

0:30:15.600 --> 0:30:18.960
<v Speaker 1>Gender roll flop flip flu fuck.

0:30:20.280 --> 0:30:22.760
<v Speaker 2>It is because his new cheek kill whoop ass? When

0:30:22.760 --> 0:30:25.680
<v Speaker 2>ain't gonna talk about her too much? She can fight,

0:30:26.560 --> 0:30:30.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm not skinned. It also, Remy obviously has guns. She

0:30:31.200 --> 0:30:31.680
<v Speaker 2>can fight.

0:30:32.880 --> 0:30:35.360
<v Speaker 1>Who's trying to fight? So have you ever been in

0:30:35.360 --> 0:30:39.120
<v Speaker 1>a situationship and like couldn't leave it because of emotions?

0:30:39.880 --> 0:30:44.920
<v Speaker 2>Yes, I just got out of a situationship that I

0:30:45.040 --> 0:30:48.360
<v Speaker 2>was in for a long long time. And I still

0:30:48.360 --> 0:30:51.120
<v Speaker 2>think about him all the time. But I had to

0:30:51.120 --> 0:30:53.280
<v Speaker 2>get up out of her. I broke my foot behind

0:30:53.280 --> 0:30:57.360
<v Speaker 2>that ship, y'all. I broke my foot behind that ship.

0:30:57.800 --> 0:30:59.240
<v Speaker 2>And that's when I was like, all right, you know what,

0:30:59.440 --> 0:31:04.160
<v Speaker 2>girls start, go go and get your life together. So

0:31:05.520 --> 0:31:08.480
<v Speaker 2>but it's like, it's a what's the word I'm looking for.

0:31:08.560 --> 0:31:12.320
<v Speaker 2>It's a soul tar. Sometimes you have a soul tar

0:31:12.440 --> 0:31:15.160
<v Speaker 2>with someone and you just gotta untether and that shit

0:31:15.320 --> 0:31:18.160
<v Speaker 2>be hard, and that ain't nothing but the devil, you know.

0:31:18.960 --> 0:31:22.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I feel like anything confusing is the devil. If

0:31:22.720 --> 0:31:27.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm in any any situation and I don't know exactly

0:31:27.880 --> 0:31:30.400
<v Speaker 1>what's going on, it got it like only the devil

0:31:30.400 --> 0:31:32.120
<v Speaker 1>will be trying to confuse you like that. So why

0:31:32.120 --> 0:31:36.120
<v Speaker 1>would anybody want to be engaging with anyone and not

0:31:36.200 --> 0:31:39.760
<v Speaker 1>just tell them what's up? Hey, I want to fuck sometimes?

0:31:40.480 --> 0:31:44.840
<v Speaker 1>You know, I was dating somebody who was too honest, right,

0:31:46.440 --> 0:31:47.360
<v Speaker 1>See that's the problem.

0:31:47.600 --> 0:31:49.840
<v Speaker 2>You wanted to get ass honest. But then you're talking

0:31:49.840 --> 0:31:50.840
<v Speaker 2>about he too honest?

0:31:51.040 --> 0:31:52.560
<v Speaker 1>Like I would call him like you want to do

0:31:52.640 --> 0:31:54.840
<v Speaker 1>something like I want to come over and he and

0:31:54.880 --> 0:31:57.920
<v Speaker 1>he would say shit like I kind of want to,

0:31:58.040 --> 0:32:00.920
<v Speaker 1>but then I don't.

0:32:02.520 --> 0:32:05.080
<v Speaker 2>And how would you receive that? Because what does that mean?

0:32:05.320 --> 0:32:08.520
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck does that mean? You know what I'm saying.

0:32:08.600 --> 0:32:11.200
<v Speaker 1>So when he started liking me more, right.

0:32:11.760 --> 0:32:14.440
<v Speaker 2>When the tables turned, I always.

0:32:13.920 --> 0:32:16.280
<v Speaker 1>Kind of like at I was at the tail end

0:32:16.320 --> 0:32:18.880
<v Speaker 1>of the bullshit at that point. I was tired of

0:32:19.440 --> 0:32:22.640
<v Speaker 1>being in a being in a situation with somebody like

0:32:23.800 --> 0:32:25.760
<v Speaker 1>that's not even courting at that point, because we like

0:32:26.480 --> 0:32:28.200
<v Speaker 1>a year and a half locked in you don't have

0:32:28.200 --> 0:32:30.560
<v Speaker 1>been to my mama house. We'd be chilling. You know

0:32:30.560 --> 0:32:32.120
<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying. We're doing the nasty.

0:32:32.520 --> 0:32:33.680
<v Speaker 2>Oh, I know who you're talking about.

0:32:34.360 --> 0:32:37.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm taking your places, pulling out with your ass and

0:32:37.640 --> 0:32:43.160
<v Speaker 1>Chelsea boots. Oh, Chelsea, don't.

0:32:43.280 --> 0:32:46.120
<v Speaker 2>Don't fuck with no niggas who wear Chelsea boots. Okay,

0:32:47.080 --> 0:32:49.440
<v Speaker 2>niggas sent me a picture this weekend with Chelsea boots

0:32:49.440 --> 0:32:52.760
<v Speaker 2>on the boots on the ground. Because he was.

0:32:55.240 --> 0:33:00.800
<v Speaker 1>Get so, I was always feeling confused and I couldn't

0:33:00.840 --> 0:33:04.080
<v Speaker 1>really check him on stuff because you left.

0:33:04.000 --> 0:33:07.080
<v Speaker 2>The door open and he was honest and you were

0:33:07.120 --> 0:33:07.719
<v Speaker 2>he was honest.

0:33:07.720 --> 0:33:11.600
<v Speaker 1>He's single, and so am I essentially. But when I

0:33:11.640 --> 0:33:14.760
<v Speaker 1>started like just hanging out a little bit extra or

0:33:14.880 --> 0:33:18.360
<v Speaker 1>not being as available, he actually told me like he

0:33:18.400 --> 0:33:20.800
<v Speaker 1>don't like how he feels. Well, I have been feeling

0:33:20.880 --> 0:33:22.600
<v Speaker 1>like that for a year and a half and we

0:33:22.680 --> 0:33:26.880
<v Speaker 1>could have been together building a whole life. But obviously

0:33:27.200 --> 0:33:30.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. It's not too late, child, Lease it

0:33:30.320 --> 0:33:35.080
<v Speaker 1>is too late. Okay, it is too fucking late. I'll

0:33:35.080 --> 0:33:36.200
<v Speaker 1>play around a little bit.

0:33:36.040 --> 0:33:38.600
<v Speaker 2>But I'm just scared I'm gonna choose the wrong person

0:33:39.200 --> 0:33:42.719
<v Speaker 2>and end up by like I feel like if I

0:33:42.760 --> 0:33:45.960
<v Speaker 2>don't like start going to therapy and like working through.

0:33:46.160 --> 0:33:50.320
<v Speaker 1>I let you go to therapy. I stopped why.

0:33:50.720 --> 0:33:53.600
<v Speaker 2>Because my therapist became my homeboy, and it just was

0:33:53.680 --> 0:33:59.760
<v Speaker 2>like our relationship changed, our dynamic change, so I can't

0:34:00.080 --> 0:34:07.200
<v Speaker 2>can't be my therapist became my homeboy, you know, and

0:34:07.200 --> 0:34:10.120
<v Speaker 2>we started talking outside of therapy, and it just no

0:34:10.160 --> 0:34:18.200
<v Speaker 2>longer became uh a safe space. And that's why that's

0:34:18.239 --> 0:34:22.279
<v Speaker 2>why he was giving me free therapy. No, he was

0:34:22.280 --> 0:34:25.320
<v Speaker 2>giving me excellent therapy. But and he still does a

0:34:25.360 --> 0:34:29.680
<v Speaker 2>little bit, but it's not like you know, ongoing therapy

0:34:29.719 --> 0:34:33.040
<v Speaker 2>and like working through things. And I need that because

0:34:33.080 --> 0:34:35.120
<v Speaker 2>I know I'm a commitment fold and I know that

0:34:35.360 --> 0:34:39.640
<v Speaker 2>I have like like even I love my hair in locks,

0:34:39.640 --> 0:34:41.800
<v Speaker 2>but I will not put my hair in locks because

0:34:41.800 --> 0:34:45.799
<v Speaker 2>I can't commit. Yeah, it's just too like start hyperventilating.

0:34:45.840 --> 0:34:48.160
<v Speaker 2>I'm stuck into something, you know. And that's just how

0:34:48.200 --> 0:34:51.120
<v Speaker 2>my relationships have been my entire life. And I don't

0:34:51.160 --> 0:34:56.120
<v Speaker 2>know with men. I will commit to females, not in

0:34:56.160 --> 0:35:00.000
<v Speaker 2>a lesbian way, happy prima, not in a lesbian way,

0:35:00.040 --> 0:35:02.640
<v Speaker 2>but like in friendships for life, I'll be like we

0:35:02.880 --> 0:35:06.840
<v Speaker 2>locked in for life Ashley we aj we locked in

0:35:06.920 --> 0:35:10.000
<v Speaker 2>for life. I can say that, I can say that,

0:35:10.960 --> 0:35:15.439
<v Speaker 2>you know, in perpetuity, but with these men, I'd be like, shit,

0:35:15.680 --> 0:35:19.040
<v Speaker 2>you cool, you know, and I don't know what that

0:35:19.480 --> 0:35:22.200
<v Speaker 2>might be, like a daddy issue or I don't know

0:35:22.200 --> 0:35:22.719
<v Speaker 2>what that is.

0:35:22.760 --> 0:35:24.600
<v Speaker 1>Why is today? I think it's just you know, you

0:35:25.239 --> 0:35:28.280
<v Speaker 1>you're in relationships with people and you start learning things

0:35:28.320 --> 0:35:31.600
<v Speaker 1>like every relationship. Like the other night, I sat down,

0:35:31.719 --> 0:35:34.719
<v Speaker 1>Remember we have our list of the kind of I'm

0:35:34.760 --> 0:35:36.960
<v Speaker 1>going through a breakup right now, y'all. Okay, it's been

0:35:37.000 --> 0:35:42.320
<v Speaker 1>going on for months, and I revamped my thing based

0:35:42.400 --> 0:35:46.440
<v Speaker 1>because I have new data now, new information. I know

0:35:47.440 --> 0:35:49.640
<v Speaker 1>more things I don't like now, I know more things

0:35:49.640 --> 0:35:52.000
<v Speaker 1>I would like now, you know, out of a partner.

0:35:52.040 --> 0:35:53.960
<v Speaker 1>And I don't think these look like y'all can make

0:35:53.960 --> 0:35:57.080
<v Speaker 1>a list. I don't think it's outlandish, like to have real,

0:35:57.920 --> 0:36:02.560
<v Speaker 1>like specific characteristics of the type of person you want,

0:36:02.640 --> 0:36:04.839
<v Speaker 1>even if people may call it shallow, I don't know,

0:36:04.880 --> 0:36:07.920
<v Speaker 1>put it down, write the shit down, you know. But

0:36:08.200 --> 0:36:10.920
<v Speaker 1>there's like new things now that I've discovered over the

0:36:11.000 --> 0:36:13.080
<v Speaker 1>last year and a half that I need out of

0:36:13.120 --> 0:36:15.839
<v Speaker 1>a partner. Like it's I got super non negotiable.

0:36:21.200 --> 0:36:24.200
<v Speaker 2>Have you discovered things that you need to be as

0:36:24.239 --> 0:36:24.800
<v Speaker 2>a partner?

0:36:25.520 --> 0:36:28.719
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely, And I also discover things I'm just not as

0:36:28.760 --> 0:36:31.160
<v Speaker 1>a partner. You know what I'm saying. I'm not the

0:36:31.200 --> 0:36:33.400
<v Speaker 1>most thoughtful person, and I've.

0:36:34.080 --> 0:36:36.040
<v Speaker 2>Really that it's so crazy.

0:36:36.080 --> 0:36:39.120
<v Speaker 1>But I definitely show up for people in a million

0:36:39.160 --> 0:36:42.319
<v Speaker 1>other ways. So like, I know, I'm not the like

0:36:42.880 --> 0:36:45.520
<v Speaker 1>the friend who going to see some shit and be like, oh,

0:36:45.920 --> 0:36:47.840
<v Speaker 1>actually might like that, or telling you might like that

0:36:47.880 --> 0:36:50.719
<v Speaker 1>and I would buy it. It depends maybe sometimes right

0:36:51.040 --> 0:36:54.200
<v Speaker 1>or shut up, I probably watch you some shit. I

0:36:54.280 --> 0:36:56.919
<v Speaker 1>not bought a bit some shit before. I've never bought

0:36:56.960 --> 0:36:59.359
<v Speaker 1>you nothing. Okay, I'm gonna sene you the Costal Canna

0:36:59.320 --> 0:37:01.600
<v Speaker 1>because y'all I would sa Costco like last week and

0:37:01.680 --> 0:37:04.839
<v Speaker 1>they do still have them candos I've been see but

0:37:05.560 --> 0:37:07.600
<v Speaker 1>my mama took me on the shopping spirit of Costco

0:37:07.640 --> 0:37:08.360
<v Speaker 1>for my birthday.

0:37:08.440 --> 0:37:12.960
<v Speaker 2>Although you saw my candle, you just kept on walking.

0:37:13.239 --> 0:37:15.319
<v Speaker 1>You know why, because I couldn't leave that big ass

0:37:15.320 --> 0:37:17.400
<v Speaker 1>candle in the car because Melt and I live on

0:37:17.440 --> 0:37:19.600
<v Speaker 1>the third floor. So like, I had a bunch of shit,

0:37:20.360 --> 0:37:22.000
<v Speaker 1>you know what I'm saying. And now add on this

0:37:22.080 --> 0:37:25.040
<v Speaker 1>fucking thirty pound candle. Yeah, but they are in there,

0:37:25.400 --> 0:37:28.279
<v Speaker 1>and I'm buy you a candle. Okay, I'm gonna buy it.

0:37:28.400 --> 0:37:29.600
<v Speaker 2>My birthday is in two weeks.

0:37:29.600 --> 0:37:31.359
<v Speaker 1>Oh, I'm gonna send that candle. Got it?

0:37:31.400 --> 0:37:31.719
<v Speaker 2>All right?

0:37:31.760 --> 0:37:34.040
<v Speaker 1>We're so yeah, I'm not we cooked back, y'all.

0:37:34.160 --> 0:37:36.440
<v Speaker 2>We're gonna see if I got that fucking candle.

0:37:37.200 --> 0:37:39.960
<v Speaker 1>I'm not that thoughtful in a relationship. You know. I

0:37:40.040 --> 0:37:42.239
<v Speaker 1>like flowers. I like flesh flowers, like my dude he

0:37:42.239 --> 0:37:43.959
<v Speaker 1>would bring me. I would have fresh flower.

0:37:43.960 --> 0:37:46.759
<v Speaker 2>Oh, let me interjet. Have you used any other ship

0:37:46.840 --> 0:37:49.160
<v Speaker 2>that I haven't bought? You like them books in them

0:37:49.239 --> 0:37:50.440
<v Speaker 2>journals and you.

0:37:50.960 --> 0:37:53.920
<v Speaker 1>Bought me two journals. You bought me a Gratitude journal,

0:37:54.400 --> 0:37:57.399
<v Speaker 1>which I probably have like six entries from that.

0:37:57.440 --> 0:37:59.919
<v Speaker 2>Year, and so toy twenty one.

0:38:00.120 --> 0:38:01.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and it's it right.

0:38:01.960 --> 0:38:05.920
<v Speaker 2>No, I bought you another another journal. It was like

0:38:06.000 --> 0:38:08.120
<v Speaker 2>a daily planner.

0:38:08.280 --> 0:38:10.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, oh yeah you did. It's a little black one.

0:38:10.840 --> 0:38:12.840
<v Speaker 1>So it's on the side of my bed next to

0:38:13.160 --> 0:38:17.879
<v Speaker 1>all the other ship that I don't be using. Yeah,

0:38:17.920 --> 0:38:19.799
<v Speaker 1>but I do have a spell book I write and

0:38:19.800 --> 0:38:22.200
<v Speaker 1>that ship all the time. That's it. I know what

0:38:22.239 --> 0:38:25.160
<v Speaker 1>to get you mixed and it's leather bound.

0:38:28.080 --> 0:38:31.719
<v Speaker 2>Go on contibity bubbity boot bitch. Listen y'all when I

0:38:31.719 --> 0:38:35.680
<v Speaker 2>walked in. Also, she gonna say bibbity bobbity pebbage. Take

0:38:35.680 --> 0:38:38.239
<v Speaker 2>that shit off.

0:38:38.880 --> 0:38:40.000
<v Speaker 1>Because what is happening?

0:38:40.080 --> 0:38:42.360
<v Speaker 2>No, I'm chilling today.

0:38:42.920 --> 0:38:46.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so I don't know. I learned, Uh, I do

0:38:46.640 --> 0:38:49.400
<v Speaker 1>have Everybody comes with bullshit. I definitely don't want a

0:38:49.440 --> 0:38:53.960
<v Speaker 1>situationship for any next anything. And I'm really not even uh.

0:38:53.680 --> 0:38:54.560
<v Speaker 2>It's hot outside.

0:38:55.440 --> 0:38:58.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I don't really feel like men right now. I

0:38:58.239 --> 0:38:58.800
<v Speaker 1>really don't.

0:38:59.040 --> 0:39:00.560
<v Speaker 2>So you don't want no man for the summer?

0:39:00.600 --> 0:39:03.120
<v Speaker 1>No, I don't no not to need a man for

0:39:03.160 --> 0:39:04.759
<v Speaker 1>the summer because I want to be pregnant by the

0:39:04.840 --> 0:39:07.080
<v Speaker 1>end of the year. I don't know how that's supposed

0:39:07.120 --> 0:39:10.640
<v Speaker 1>to work. So you don't want to go on a vacations, Oh,

0:39:10.640 --> 0:39:12.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm going on some type of something.

0:39:12.440 --> 0:39:14.800
<v Speaker 2>So you gotta have you, You gotta have somebody to do.

0:39:15.120 --> 0:39:17.000
<v Speaker 1>It would have to be a situationship. It could be

0:39:17.040 --> 0:39:19.239
<v Speaker 1>a friend. I feel like situationships come with a lot

0:39:19.239 --> 0:39:20.000
<v Speaker 1>of emotions.

0:39:20.040 --> 0:39:22.240
<v Speaker 2>So hold on, wait, wait when you say a friend,

0:39:22.600 --> 0:39:24.920
<v Speaker 2>what's the difference are you gonna if you go on

0:39:24.920 --> 0:39:25.480
<v Speaker 2>a vacation.

0:39:26.160 --> 0:39:31.000
<v Speaker 1>Typically vacations clue a male friend that you're having sex with.

0:39:31.480 --> 0:39:35.320
<v Speaker 2>So that's the situationship. No, I don't mean, what's the difference.

0:39:35.320 --> 0:39:37.759
<v Speaker 1>That's why I think that situationships this is a totally

0:39:37.800 --> 0:39:42.919
<v Speaker 1>different thing. Situationships come with emotion and it's usually one person.

0:39:44.120 --> 0:39:46.160
<v Speaker 2>You can have a like, it could be a situation.

0:39:46.320 --> 0:39:49.279
<v Speaker 2>It depends on what the situation is. So you can

0:39:49.360 --> 0:39:51.239
<v Speaker 2>have a guy like I know a girl like one

0:39:51.280 --> 0:39:54.320
<v Speaker 2>of my hair clients, she got a guy who she

0:39:54.440 --> 0:39:57.360
<v Speaker 2>deal with. She got a man, he got a girlfriend.

0:39:58.000 --> 0:40:00.440
<v Speaker 2>They see each other out in the club and they together,

0:40:00.600 --> 0:40:03.319
<v Speaker 2>they hook up, and then they go they separate ways,

0:40:04.239 --> 0:40:05.600
<v Speaker 2>and they do that all the time.

0:40:06.200 --> 0:40:09.279
<v Speaker 1>I don't think that's the situationship. I just think that

0:40:09.360 --> 0:40:13.200
<v Speaker 1>they're they're too adults who enjoy having sex with each other,

0:40:14.160 --> 0:40:17.440
<v Speaker 1>Like that's the situation. No, I think yeah, and then

0:40:17.520 --> 0:40:22.600
<v Speaker 1>and they like link that's they that's their situationship. You

0:40:22.680 --> 0:40:25.080
<v Speaker 1>said it's deeper, it gotta be deeper. I think it is.

0:40:25.600 --> 0:40:28.160
<v Speaker 2>No, it don't, it really don't. It just depends on

0:40:28.200 --> 0:40:29.359
<v Speaker 2>what the situation is.

0:40:29.440 --> 0:40:31.279
<v Speaker 1>A lot of times people be in situations I.

0:40:31.200 --> 0:40:33.960
<v Speaker 2>Feel like you gotta the only the only thing you

0:40:34.040 --> 0:40:36.960
<v Speaker 2>gotta be doing to be included in the situationship. It

0:40:36.960 --> 0:40:39.840
<v Speaker 2>has to happen frequent, and you gotta be having sex.

0:40:41.160 --> 0:40:46.000
<v Speaker 2>And that's the situationship. And it's just different situations. What's

0:40:46.000 --> 0:40:51.919
<v Speaker 2>the situation y'all not together, y'all having sex frequently? What's

0:40:51.960 --> 0:40:52.600
<v Speaker 2>the situation?

0:40:53.160 --> 0:40:55.359
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. I don't think. I just I think

0:40:55.400 --> 0:40:57.480
<v Speaker 1>I have a different idea in my mind about what

0:40:58.480 --> 0:41:00.839
<v Speaker 1>that thing is. So you got to be I think

0:41:00.920 --> 0:41:05.040
<v Speaker 1>men benefit more from situationships women be wanting. I feel

0:41:05.040 --> 0:41:08.160
<v Speaker 1>like it's limbo. You're stuck in a live and and

0:41:08.160 --> 0:41:14.280
<v Speaker 1>and uh, you're stuck in like purgatory relationship. Purgatory essentially.

0:41:14.680 --> 0:41:16.640
<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm saying, you want, But not every

0:41:16.680 --> 0:41:18.640
<v Speaker 2>woman wants to be with that nigga they're in a

0:41:18.719 --> 0:41:21.719
<v Speaker 2>situationship or man that they're in a situationship with.

0:41:21.840 --> 0:41:23.959
<v Speaker 1>You don't really want to have at this big age,

0:41:24.000 --> 0:41:25.680
<v Speaker 1>I do not want to have sex with somebody that

0:41:25.760 --> 0:41:29.640
<v Speaker 1>I don't like or I don't see the futureship with

0:41:29.840 --> 0:41:32.160
<v Speaker 1>you're saying. That's why I said, I like variety, but

0:41:32.640 --> 0:41:34.239
<v Speaker 1>I don't want to sleep with all these people. I

0:41:34.239 --> 0:41:36.600
<v Speaker 1>don't want to sleep with none of I just want

0:41:36.600 --> 0:41:41.880
<v Speaker 1>their energy. Oh, I mean energy suck. Yeah, I want to,

0:41:41.920 --> 0:41:43.960
<v Speaker 1>like I want to. I want to be in there,

0:41:44.080 --> 0:41:45.160
<v Speaker 1>like I want the vibes.

0:41:45.239 --> 0:41:48.120
<v Speaker 2>I create vibes. Though I create vibes, I bring good energy,

0:41:48.320 --> 0:41:50.360
<v Speaker 2>and I be wanting to be around good energy. But

0:41:50.440 --> 0:41:53.520
<v Speaker 2>I enjoy variety, you know, in different perspectives.

0:41:53.920 --> 0:41:57.600
<v Speaker 1>Mmmm, I don't know what. I guess that that would

0:41:57.640 --> 0:42:01.239
<v Speaker 1>be just be dating. I wouldn't I enjoy dating. Yeah,

0:42:01.760 --> 0:42:06.120
<v Speaker 1>that's dating, you know, like, and you should date, right,

0:42:06.280 --> 0:42:08.600
<v Speaker 1>And I think more women should date and not be

0:42:08.680 --> 0:42:11.160
<v Speaker 1>having sex. You don't have to have sex with everybody

0:42:11.200 --> 0:42:12.120
<v Speaker 1>you hanging out with.

0:42:12.280 --> 0:42:15.040
<v Speaker 2>Listen, I don't have sex with nobody. It was so funny.

0:42:17.040 --> 0:42:19.160
<v Speaker 2>I was with my you know, I'm not even gonna

0:42:19.160 --> 0:42:22.319
<v Speaker 2>tell that story, no telling, No, I'm not, because that's

0:42:22.320 --> 0:42:24.640
<v Speaker 2>what I really enjoy their company. I don'tant to even

0:42:25.040 --> 0:42:26.279
<v Speaker 2>share that business on here.

0:42:27.040 --> 0:42:29.200
<v Speaker 1>Do you think a situationship could ever become like a

0:42:29.239 --> 0:42:31.240
<v Speaker 1>healthy relationship? Yeah?

0:42:31.239 --> 0:42:35.560
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely. Sometimes it's just like two people having fun and

0:42:35.600 --> 0:42:38.640
<v Speaker 2>then it turns into something else, it turns into more.

0:42:38.920 --> 0:42:41.240
<v Speaker 1>You don't think it could happen. It does happen.

0:42:42.880 --> 0:42:47.880
<v Speaker 2>One of my friends right now, she's with it, locked

0:42:47.920 --> 0:42:51.160
<v Speaker 2>in and they got two kids. It was a situationship.

0:42:51.200 --> 0:42:54.400
<v Speaker 2>They would like just be like travel buddies. They meet

0:42:54.520 --> 0:42:58.600
<v Speaker 2>different places around the world, you know, vacation they were

0:42:58.640 --> 0:43:01.640
<v Speaker 2>like vacation friends. That's what they would do. And then

0:43:01.920 --> 0:43:04.880
<v Speaker 2>she got pregnant and then she had a baby, and

0:43:04.920 --> 0:43:07.600
<v Speaker 2>they still wasn't like when she got pregnant, I don't

0:43:07.600 --> 0:43:09.640
<v Speaker 2>feel like they was like really locked in like that.

0:43:10.160 --> 0:43:13.200
<v Speaker 2>You know, they fucked with each other hard, but and

0:43:13.239 --> 0:43:15.560
<v Speaker 2>then all of it just turned into something more. And

0:43:15.600 --> 0:43:18.000
<v Speaker 2>now they're a family and they have a beautiful family

0:43:18.080 --> 0:43:19.160
<v Speaker 2>and they're happy together.

0:43:20.280 --> 0:43:24.960
<v Speaker 1>And that was a situation ship. Was she talking to

0:43:24.960 --> 0:43:26.640
<v Speaker 1>other people? Was he talking to other people?

0:43:26.960 --> 0:43:29.840
<v Speaker 2>We don't know, We don't Yeah, she was talking to

0:43:29.880 --> 0:43:33.520
<v Speaker 2>other people, Like, yeah, she was dating and I think

0:43:33.560 --> 0:43:36.680
<v Speaker 2>he was too, you know, but they were just like

0:43:36.920 --> 0:43:39.279
<v Speaker 2>they had enjoyed it. And that thing went on for

0:43:39.320 --> 0:43:41.880
<v Speaker 2>like eight years before she got pregnant him, before she

0:43:41.920 --> 0:43:44.600
<v Speaker 2>got pregnant by him, I know. And now they got

0:43:44.600 --> 0:43:48.720
<v Speaker 2>a beautiful family. So it can happen. It has happened,

0:43:48.719 --> 0:43:49.480
<v Speaker 2>It does happen.

0:43:52.000 --> 0:43:53.880
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. I don't think I can be in

0:43:54.040 --> 0:43:57.239
<v Speaker 1>limbo too long with somebody, Like I've definitely done it.

0:43:58.080 --> 0:44:01.840
<v Speaker 1>And when you when you want more, you want stability.

0:44:02.360 --> 0:44:04.440
<v Speaker 1>I don't. I'd be wanting to, Like I always say,

0:44:04.480 --> 0:44:08.080
<v Speaker 1>I like to feel single in relationships, but I don't

0:44:08.120 --> 0:44:11.520
<v Speaker 1>really like to be single.

0:44:12.320 --> 0:44:14.720
<v Speaker 2>So you think it I'm the reader hearing it says

0:44:14.840 --> 0:44:18.600
<v Speaker 2>the emotional burnout of being almost loved. So you think,

0:44:18.680 --> 0:44:21.000
<v Speaker 2>like situationships is almost low.

0:44:21.160 --> 0:44:24.680
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I do, I think, And that's why I said.

0:44:24.680 --> 0:44:29.680
<v Speaker 1>I think men and men benefit more from situationships because

0:44:29.719 --> 0:44:32.120
<v Speaker 1>they don't have that. They don't have to deal with

0:44:32.280 --> 0:44:35.479
<v Speaker 1>the emotions of a woman, right, they can just say, hey,

0:44:35.600 --> 0:44:37.840
<v Speaker 1>excuse me, sweetie, we not together like that, Yeah, we

0:44:37.960 --> 0:44:39.279
<v Speaker 1>smashing raw.

0:44:40.320 --> 0:44:45.360
<v Speaker 2>But that's you say that, Like the situationships are always

0:44:45.360 --> 0:44:48.080
<v Speaker 2>because there's a woman who wants to be with this

0:44:48.160 --> 0:44:49.480
<v Speaker 2>man and it's not the case.

0:44:50.320 --> 0:44:53.000
<v Speaker 1>What's the percentage? What is the percentage? It's so many

0:44:53.000 --> 0:44:56.160
<v Speaker 1>fucking flute fries fruit flies flying around in the here.

0:44:56.360 --> 0:44:57.480
<v Speaker 2>I know, what is it?

0:44:58.640 --> 0:45:01.200
<v Speaker 1>What is the percentage? Then? Because I think like it's

0:45:01.239 --> 0:45:05.399
<v Speaker 1>a high percentage of women who are stuck in relationship

0:45:05.880 --> 0:45:10.839
<v Speaker 1>situationship purgatory. Then men, I don't know.

0:45:11.200 --> 0:45:16.359
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I think especially these young girls, these

0:45:16.400 --> 0:45:20.399
<v Speaker 2>young girls is out here not caring. They really don't care.

0:45:22.400 --> 0:45:25.440
<v Speaker 2>I care too, That's why I do. That's why, and

0:45:25.480 --> 0:45:28.640
<v Speaker 2>that's why I don't. I don't be fucking like that

0:45:28.760 --> 0:45:31.400
<v Speaker 2>because I like we fucking I'm in love, like we

0:45:31.520 --> 0:45:33.279
<v Speaker 2>go together. I don't want to be I want to

0:45:33.320 --> 0:45:35.839
<v Speaker 2>be with you. So that's why I don't do it

0:45:35.840 --> 0:45:36.200
<v Speaker 2>no more.

0:45:37.719 --> 0:45:38.800
<v Speaker 1>I stopped.

0:45:39.960 --> 0:45:48.200
<v Speaker 2>Like once I turned thirty two years ago. It's shit whatever,

0:45:49.400 --> 0:45:53.320
<v Speaker 2>Just stop doing that because it's just something about sleeping

0:45:53.360 --> 0:45:56.319
<v Speaker 2>with someone and sharing your body for me. It just

0:45:56.840 --> 0:45:57.759
<v Speaker 2>I feel connected.

0:45:59.239 --> 0:45:59.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I don't.

0:46:00.400 --> 0:46:02.360
<v Speaker 2>No, you don't feel that connectional.

0:46:03.560 --> 0:46:05.759
<v Speaker 1>So we put a little poll. I'm trying to see

0:46:05.760 --> 0:46:09.200
<v Speaker 1>if we got any any responses. I wanted to hear

0:46:09.200 --> 0:46:13.200
<v Speaker 1>about other people's situationships, y'all, I would love we like

0:46:13.280 --> 0:46:17.840
<v Speaker 1>to hear other people's business. Okay, so call us. You

0:46:17.840 --> 0:46:21.239
<v Speaker 1>don't like you don't like being nosy. I like it.

0:46:21.280 --> 0:46:22.000
<v Speaker 2>I get tired.

0:46:22.440 --> 0:46:24.920
<v Speaker 1>I like it. I get tired, y'all call it, call it,

0:46:25.000 --> 0:46:28.239
<v Speaker 1>call us and tell us about your situationships called nine one, nine, four, ten,

0:46:28.360 --> 0:46:31.240
<v Speaker 1>seventy seven, thirty five, and tell me all your motherfucking business.

0:46:32.040 --> 0:46:34.960
<v Speaker 2>Listen, you got three minutes before it's gonna hang up

0:46:35.000 --> 0:46:37.040
<v Speaker 2>on you, and you got a call back, so put

0:46:37.040 --> 0:46:38.160
<v Speaker 2>your timer on or something.

0:46:38.360 --> 0:46:40.919
<v Speaker 1>I think situationships are dangerous. I feel like everybody should

0:46:40.920 --> 0:46:45.040
<v Speaker 1>stay the fuck up out of them. Children come through situationships.

0:46:45.200 --> 0:46:49.600
<v Speaker 1>We need you don't You need children with both family,

0:46:49.920 --> 0:46:53.000
<v Speaker 1>both people in the household. When children are born out

0:46:53.000 --> 0:46:58.120
<v Speaker 1>of side situations and situationships, it is a strenuous relationship

0:46:58.160 --> 0:47:01.920
<v Speaker 1>at that point between these two adult It's not Nothing

0:47:02.120 --> 0:47:03.960
<v Speaker 1>good comes out of situationships.

0:47:04.719 --> 0:47:07.040
<v Speaker 2>I mean, I get what you're saying, but I mean,

0:47:07.120 --> 0:47:08.359
<v Speaker 2>in twenty twenty.

0:47:08.040 --> 0:47:11.239
<v Speaker 1>Five, get off the damn dating apps. Go out.

0:47:11.400 --> 0:47:14.880
<v Speaker 2>There is a lot of I mean there, let's be honest.

0:47:15.400 --> 0:47:20.600
<v Speaker 2>The black family unit has changed. The dynamic is different.

0:47:20.840 --> 0:47:25.560
<v Speaker 2>You know, a lot of black families are in different homes,

0:47:25.640 --> 0:47:28.560
<v Speaker 2>They're not in the same household.

0:47:28.680 --> 0:47:32.799
<v Speaker 1>And where is that getting us? We are fucked up?

0:47:33.520 --> 0:47:36.600
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, yeah, but that's the reality of things.

0:47:36.280 --> 0:47:38.600
<v Speaker 1>Though, you know, it doesn't have to be the reality

0:47:38.640 --> 0:47:41.920
<v Speaker 1>of things. I'm for people not being in situationships, like

0:47:42.000 --> 0:47:45.560
<v Speaker 1>actually date people you know, and actually get into actual

0:47:45.640 --> 0:47:49.480
<v Speaker 1>real relationships. Start your families, do things the right way.

0:47:49.520 --> 0:47:51.919
<v Speaker 1>Like you know, I'm not no super religious person, right,

0:47:52.520 --> 0:47:56.719
<v Speaker 1>but the Bible basic instructions before leaving earth right. The

0:47:56.760 --> 0:47:59.719
<v Speaker 1>Bible does give you a pretty nice instruction guide on

0:47:59.800 --> 0:48:02.360
<v Speaker 1>high to live so you don't get fucked up, you

0:48:02.360 --> 0:48:06.319
<v Speaker 1>know what I'm saying. Like it's still got some botion,

0:48:06.480 --> 0:48:08.080
<v Speaker 1>and they're like, you know, you're not supposed to fortunicate

0:48:08.160 --> 0:48:09.800
<v Speaker 1>with your neighbor's wife, but don't say nothing about the

0:48:09.800 --> 0:48:12.080
<v Speaker 1>bitch around the corner, so you will still do.

0:48:12.560 --> 0:48:16.200
<v Speaker 2>It says don't fornicate period until you're married. I mean,

0:48:16.200 --> 0:48:18.040
<v Speaker 2>we're going if we're going biblical.

0:48:17.640 --> 0:48:20.000
<v Speaker 1>And it says nothing about Mary for love either. It

0:48:20.040 --> 0:48:23.520
<v Speaker 1>says if you can't sustain from not having sex anymore thing,

0:48:23.520 --> 0:48:27.759
<v Speaker 1>you should find a wife. So I don't know, I

0:48:27.800 --> 0:48:32.560
<v Speaker 1>just feel like people are I'm I'm stressed out about

0:48:32.560 --> 0:48:35.319
<v Speaker 1>the black community right now. I'm not black, nom more, y'all.

0:48:35.320 --> 0:48:37.440
<v Speaker 1>I forgot to tell y'all, I'm gold with a little degreen.

0:48:37.640 --> 0:48:41.000
<v Speaker 2>So listen, how you stressed out about a community you

0:48:41.000 --> 0:48:42.440
<v Speaker 2>don't even belong to it anymore?

0:48:42.640 --> 0:48:49.440
<v Speaker 1>The word uh not expatriate. I have uh not excommunicated.

0:48:48.600 --> 0:48:50.440
<v Speaker 2>Your expet from the black community.

0:48:50.560 --> 0:48:55.360
<v Speaker 1>Not expat I'm looking for h I have divested. No,

0:48:55.400 --> 0:48:56.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm not divested.

0:48:56.320 --> 0:48:58.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna say now you divested from the black community.

0:48:58.880 --> 0:48:59.400
<v Speaker 2>It's crazy.

0:48:59.560 --> 0:49:03.080
<v Speaker 1>No, I'm not I divested, but I just it's a

0:49:03.080 --> 0:49:04.759
<v Speaker 1>lot of things that we got going on. I just

0:49:04.760 --> 0:49:08.000
<v Speaker 1>don't agree with you, know what I'm saying. So listen,

0:49:08.000 --> 0:49:08.359
<v Speaker 1>if you.

0:49:08.360 --> 0:49:11.239
<v Speaker 2>Are so situationships are one of them. You think that

0:49:11.360 --> 0:49:14.799
<v Speaker 2>relationship or the hooked up culture gotta stop. It's so

0:49:14.880 --> 0:49:17.360
<v Speaker 2>crazy that you your age now, you know what that

0:49:17.400 --> 0:49:21.000
<v Speaker 2>reminds me of, Like my grandma telling me these are

0:49:21.120 --> 0:49:24.319
<v Speaker 2>last days. And I'm like, Grandma, You're seventy years old

0:49:24.440 --> 0:49:26.400
<v Speaker 2>and now you're talking about it's our last days and

0:49:26.480 --> 0:49:27.600
<v Speaker 2>I'm just a young bud.

0:49:28.080 --> 0:49:29.799
<v Speaker 1>You know why is that you feel with me talking

0:49:29.800 --> 0:49:30.359
<v Speaker 1>to you right now?

0:49:30.520 --> 0:49:32.840
<v Speaker 2>No, I'm saying you talking to the people, not me

0:49:33.360 --> 0:49:36.279
<v Speaker 2>talking to the audience, like saying, you're not being in

0:49:36.360 --> 0:49:39.080
<v Speaker 2>hellas situationships in your life, and now you're telling.

0:49:38.840 --> 0:49:42.480
<v Speaker 1>Hella, I have been in one. I have been Excuse me,

0:49:42.480 --> 0:49:48.799
<v Speaker 1>I've been in two situationships in life. Okay too, Compee girl, Well,

0:49:48.840 --> 0:49:52.520
<v Speaker 1>if if it turns into a relationship, wasn't really a situationship.

0:49:54.360 --> 0:49:59.520
<v Speaker 1>I mean, like I begetting to the end, it was

0:49:59.640 --> 0:50:04.800
<v Speaker 1>never nothing else going on. I'm tired of saying situationship anyway,

0:50:05.320 --> 0:50:07.960
<v Speaker 1>don't uh, y'all.

0:50:08.000 --> 0:50:09.799
<v Speaker 2>When y'all watch this, I want you to watch it

0:50:09.800 --> 0:50:13.080
<v Speaker 2>with your homegirls and take a sip of your drink.

0:50:13.200 --> 0:50:16.600
<v Speaker 2>Every time we say situationship. It shouldn't go out to

0:50:16.640 --> 0:50:18.000
<v Speaker 2>the day party or stuff like that.

0:50:19.680 --> 0:50:21.319
<v Speaker 1>Anyway. What's your last last time?

0:50:23.680 --> 0:50:27.799
<v Speaker 2>Listen? Life is short. Do what makes you happy, you know,

0:50:27.920 --> 0:50:30.319
<v Speaker 2>do it feels good, but just be prepared for the

0:50:30.360 --> 0:50:33.960
<v Speaker 2>consequences of all your choices. That's my last last.

0:50:35.719 --> 0:50:41.840
<v Speaker 1>Y'all. I choose clarity over confusion, because that's all my

0:50:42.040 --> 0:50:46.560
<v Speaker 1>situationships is offering. If you don't know where you stand

0:50:46.600 --> 0:50:49.680
<v Speaker 1>in someone else's life, if you're having a call another

0:50:49.719 --> 0:50:54.120
<v Speaker 1>bitch to ask her if she's fucking with him, fucking

0:50:54.160 --> 0:50:57.760
<v Speaker 1>with this man, you you gotta check in with somebody

0:50:57.760 --> 0:50:59.560
<v Speaker 1>else to see where you stand in this man's life.

0:50:59.600 --> 0:51:02.160
<v Speaker 1>You are and that's super duper situation ship. Get out

0:51:02.160 --> 0:51:07.160
<v Speaker 1>of there, save your life. But all situation girls, shut

0:51:07.239 --> 0:51:13.160
<v Speaker 1>up you a boy anyway, There can be clarity within

0:51:13.200 --> 0:51:13.840
<v Speaker 1>your situation.

0:51:13.920 --> 0:51:14.960
<v Speaker 2>This is what it is.

0:51:15.480 --> 0:51:17.799
<v Speaker 1>I guess anyway, y'all. If you enjoy this episode, y'all

0:51:17.800 --> 0:51:19.960
<v Speaker 1>tune in every Thursday on The Black Effect. iHeart radio app.

0:51:19.960 --> 0:51:22.440
<v Speaker 1>Where the fuck you get your podcast at? This your.

0:51:25.320 --> 0:51:28.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah it's Sam Mam. I got on T shirt and sweatpants.

0:51:28.000 --> 0:51:31.920
<v Speaker 2>Maybe that's the energy I'm giving today. Maybe I am

0:51:32.000 --> 0:51:32.600
<v Speaker 2>a dyke today.

0:51:32.680 --> 0:51:33.400
<v Speaker 1>Fuck you bitch.

0:51:34.800 --> 0:51:39.759
<v Speaker 2>Remember to speak now and never hold your nuts.

0:51:41.080 --> 0:51:44.520
<v Speaker 1>We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeart Radio.

0:51:44.719 --> 0:51:48.760
<v Speaker 1>Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen

0:51:48.800 --> 0:51:49.800
<v Speaker 1>to your favorite shows.