Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.
Speaker 2: We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talks.
Speaker 1: What's up, y'all? It's your girl, AJ Holiday. What's up
Speaker 1: Big Tam Bam?
Speaker 2: Y'all, it's Tam Bam. I love y'all so so very much.
Speaker 2: I love you to AJ. How you doing.
Speaker 1: I'm fine, y'all.
Speaker 2: We just got finished.
Speaker 1: So that's why, bitch, I'm fine. I don't think we
Speaker 1: should all the things bitch. I was outside Saturday.
Speaker 2: It was cute too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm posted my dress. Yeah I bought that dress.
Speaker 1: Uh So let me back up a little bit. All right,
Speaker 1: So y'all, there there are some elite black people in Charleston,
Speaker 1: thank god. Okay, No, people be thinking Charleston just is
Speaker 1: super ratchet. But this little crowd of people like from
Speaker 1: age I don't know, like thirty five to thirty eight,
Speaker 1: like they really be having shit going on here. So
Speaker 1: don Lucci Prosecco and Rose is your first black owned
Speaker 1: uh wine brand in South Carolina. Okay, Yeah, so they
Speaker 1: had their Ruby the Ruby event this weekend, and I
Speaker 1: did do like a little brief interview sweating late per usual.
Speaker 1: I'm never really late. I'm gonna stop saying that. I
Speaker 1: think I always be on time because I might have
Speaker 1: missed the accident early. No, they got there when they
Speaker 1: were supposed to, and.
Speaker 2: I that's full shit, that's what way to look at it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I got there when I was supposed to
Speaker 1: because I still got things done. But man, the shit
Speaker 1: was outside. It was hot as fuck. But it was beautiful. Okay,
Speaker 1: it was so beautiful. And these men they pay attention
Speaker 1: to the very small, intricate details of everything. The girl
Speaker 1: they had caveat. They had pizza with their little brand.
Speaker 1: Everything was branded, the candles, the pillows on the on
Speaker 1: the sofas.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: They had somebody sitting there paint because it wasn't a museum,
Speaker 1: the Gibbs Museum here in Charleston, so they had their
Speaker 1: there are different. They got three different wines and champagne.
Speaker 1: They had it like you know how you put in
Speaker 1: like the glass case like a museum. It was so nice.
Speaker 1: You go in the bathroom, they got the bottle with
Speaker 1: the little lampshade on it, like like, how y'all know
Speaker 1: to do this stuff? Everything smallest details? Yes, I love
Speaker 1: that it was so nice, and yes, I had my
Speaker 1: little dress on. Chak, I saw you I had it
Speaker 1: was a couple of pounds for that dress because I
Speaker 1: have bought that dress for in April to wear to
Speaker 1: remember that movie premiere. I went to Miami. I bought
Speaker 1: it to wear there. But the ship was too fucking
Speaker 1: tight because that ship is one hundred percent cotton. It
Speaker 1: ain't no stretch. It's either you getting in it and
Speaker 1: there you're not. Yes, And I got in there. I
Speaker 1: got in there. I don't pull some pictures. And then
Speaker 1: we went out Sunday. We went for brunch Sunday.
Speaker 2: Sitting up so good. You haven't it didn't.
Speaker 1: Look like nothing, girl, girl, I almost put a brawn.
Speaker 1: I glad I didn't boy, because that would have been milking.
Speaker 1: And I had ship on underneath that dress. Nothing.
Speaker 2: I think like since I lost weight, I lost titties too,
Speaker 2: Like I just think I need a boy.
Speaker 1: So at this point, leave them titties alone, because I know,
Speaker 1: you know people who have since gotten them titties removed.
Speaker 2: I just up at the top, like it's all sitting up.
Speaker 1: We'll get the fat transferred to the titty down't see
Speaker 1: how long that last? Instead, I wonder if I get
Speaker 1: my back exactly. My homegirl had got her body done
Speaker 1: in Saint Louis a long time ago, very like whoever
Speaker 1: she wants to. If I get some shit done, I'm
Speaker 1: flying to Saint Louis because it was like very very natural.
Speaker 2: Because I want something. I put my fat in my
Speaker 2: titty because.
Speaker 1: I didn't get titties though. So what her doctor told
Speaker 1: her is that all of all the women, the white women,
Speaker 1: all want the fat put into their titties, and all
Speaker 1: the all the black women want the fat put in
Speaker 1: their ass. So she got the fat to the ass. Okay,
Speaker 1: so she ain't get no titties.
Speaker 2: Take my back, put it in my boots.
Speaker 1: And if you need some extra fat, I'll don't how
Speaker 1: big you want them.
Speaker 2: I just want I don't even want bigger titties because
Speaker 2: I don't want big titties. I just don't want like
Speaker 2: they just all my girth is at the bottom. It's
Speaker 2: just like a slope, like a beginner's ice skin slope.
Speaker 2: You go flat across the top and then like a
Speaker 2: little cuppage at the bottom. I hate that. So I
Speaker 2: can't fill out of dress. I can't like it's so
Speaker 2: weird because dresses, like, because I'm so bottom heavy like
Speaker 2: the top, they'll assume that you got something up top,
Speaker 2: so it just be like empty in the top and
Speaker 2: like real full at the bottom.
Speaker 1: That little stuff it.
Speaker 2: Don't it's too tight at the bottom. We'll struggle with that.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. But that was my outside. I was outside
Speaker 1: all weekend, y'all. We did a Sunday fun Day brunch
Speaker 1: from I was outside from one to eight on a Sunday.
Speaker 2: Oh you was outside this week? Yeah.
Speaker 1: Now I'm recuperating, bitch, I've been fasten. I'm not eating
Speaker 1: until Thursday. This watering the water fast. So yeah, don't
Speaker 1: be getting my nerves. That was the first thing I said.
Speaker 1: It's like, girl, I'm like really like texting you back,
Speaker 1: like I haven't ate. I'm gonna need you to get
Speaker 1: off my nuts because don't y'all sucking hung Im about
Speaker 1: to take a bite out of crime.
Speaker 2: If someone saying can you send that a SAP, does
Speaker 2: that mean right then or does that mean as soon
Speaker 2: as possible? I thought, as yeah, let us know what
Speaker 2: y'all think. Somebody say I need this a SAP versus
Speaker 2: can you send that as soon as possible? Afterny for
Speaker 2: as soon as possible.
Speaker 1: Which one y'all prefer. Don't tell me to do shiit
Speaker 1: asap because I can't.
Speaker 2: I can't do nothing A sap sandwich, that's a problem.
Speaker 2: You had to say what She would have just read
Speaker 2: that and be like cool. But because she was hungry,
Speaker 2: it was all like crazy.
Speaker 1: Or because I had a lot of shit to do.
Speaker 2: So listen, my weekend. It was my besties dad's seventy
Speaker 2: seventy seventy. I can't seventieth birthday say that shit to
Speaker 2: save my life just now. And they were supposed to
Speaker 2: go to New Orleans and all the flights out of
Speaker 2: Charlotte got canceled from for a storm. It was like bad,
Speaker 2: Like the airport was just crazy.
Speaker 1: It was raining.
Speaker 2: No, it was just lightning storm.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. It's been happening over the whole country. One
Speaker 1: of my people in Texas was saying they had an
Speaker 1: electrical storm, Like so shit was going out because of
Speaker 1: the thunder and the lightning.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't raining, It wasn't. It was
Speaker 2: just like the real sharp So they just couldn't fly
Speaker 2: and like a couple of my clients got grounded. They
Speaker 2: were going to New Orleans, my friend her and her bad.
Speaker 2: So we was like, we want to still make his
Speaker 2: birthday a good one. So we took him to this
Speaker 2: restaurant in Charlick called Deluxe Fun Dining where the food
Speaker 2: comes out on like all these crazy trays and smoke
Speaker 2: and like different stuff. And we started we were drinking,
Speaker 2: taking shots, and this man could drink. I like, I
Speaker 2: haven't been drinking in a long time. And last week
Speaker 2: when I could drink, I just had me like an
Speaker 2: espresso martini. You know, I didn't really like go crazy,
Speaker 2: but Saturday I had four shots of tequila. When I
Speaker 2: tell you, I was down bad Sunday and Monday, like
Speaker 2: so bad yesterday that my blood pressure was one one
Speaker 2: ten over fifty eight.
Speaker 1: Oh hell no, bitch, I was so dehydrated. That was
Speaker 1: so dehydrated and need to go get some PDA.
Speaker 2: Yeah I did, I did. I got me. I got
Speaker 2: a watermelon and I ate a whole watermelon and I
Speaker 2: drank four bottles of water in Apedia, like just to
Speaker 2: get myself back together. But yeah, that was my weekend.
Speaker 2: We turned up for his seventy years.
Speaker 1: That's fun.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a good time. But I don't think
Speaker 2: I like liquor no more. I think I'm done with liquor.
Speaker 1: That's not my homegirl. She just had a baby, and
Speaker 1: she was like, I don't think I'm a drink no more.
Speaker 1: Like I don't even miss it, Like why I'm drinking.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, it is poison, you know. I'm always
Speaker 1: consciously aware of what it is that I'm partaking in,
Speaker 1: and every time I drink, I'd be like, man, I'm
Speaker 1: just poisoning my body. And that's why I don't drink often.
Speaker 1: I might go outside five times a year for real,
Speaker 1: five six times a year, So I'm drinking five or
Speaker 1: six times for real, like aside from like a vaca.
Speaker 1: If I go on vacation, I'm drinking. If I go
Speaker 1: like outside a Saturday, I might have one or two drinks.
Speaker 1: I don't indulge that often, and when I do, I
Speaker 1: be fucked up the next day. Luckily, I ain't drink
Speaker 1: nothing on Sunday, but I did drink a little bit
Speaker 1: on Saturday, and luckily I was all right.
Speaker 2: Luckily, me, me and my best friend get together. We
Speaker 2: just be fu like.
Speaker 1: It's just fun. I want to be loud and cussing
Speaker 1: and talking loud like I don't want to be sober.
Speaker 1: Everybody else drunk because nah, I'm like.
Speaker 2: Mad, irritated. Yeah, y'all are ignorant, you know, but that
Speaker 2: was my weekend and now I'm finally getting back. I
Speaker 2: couldn't even go to the gym yesterday, y'all. It was
Speaker 2: so bad, Like my doctor was like, if you try
Speaker 2: to go to the gym with this blood person right now,
Speaker 2: you might faint. Just stay home, drink water and put
Speaker 2: your feet up. So yeah, that's what I did. But
Speaker 2: I'm going today to this evening.
Speaker 1: Let's getting the sins they doe. So apparently female frogs
Speaker 1: take their death to avoid meeting with males they don't
Speaker 1: find attractive.
Speaker 2: It's not just us, it's not us.
Speaker 1: The only difference is if we fake our fucking death,
Speaker 1: the nigga stole might come and try to hump on
Speaker 1: your ass, right.
Speaker 2: They like they're talking, full body limp, floating upside down,
Speaker 2: even holding their breath. It's the ultimate ghost move for
Speaker 2: a frog, like I'm dead. I'm dead.
Speaker 1: Now, I did that in a relationship now, pretending like
Speaker 1: I'm sleep like we get in might that I'm planning
Speaker 1: to have sex and all that shit I done changed
Speaker 1: my my mind by the time we get home, Like
Speaker 1: I'm I'm pretend sleeping hard as hell.
Speaker 2: I definitely pretended to be sick to not have to
Speaker 2: do it. I ain't think i'mna rock bucket.
Speaker 1: When it becomes a job, I gotta get out of there.
Speaker 1: Like we gotta do this.
Speaker 2: Sometimes it just don't feel like it, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you can't deprive your partner of sex.
Speaker 1: But god, damn, I'm gonna just be acting like a frog.
Speaker 2: Be dead.
Speaker 1: I'm dead. That's our little kids be. I've then one
Speaker 1: eye open. I'm dead now. They't gonna be like, OPI
Speaker 1: your mouth.
Speaker 2: They do not care.
Speaker 1: We're dad man. They're still trying to hump on you.
Speaker 1: So I'm frogs.
Speaker 2: Statistically, if you live in Utah, you're more likely to
Speaker 2: get married than if you live anywhere else in the
Speaker 2: United States. According to the CDC and Sisters dadd and
Speaker 2: you Tak consistently ranks among the top states for marriage rates,
Speaker 2: with over twenty one point nine marriages per one thousand women. Damn,
Speaker 2: that's it, well above the national average. With culture, community values,
Speaker 2: or early commitment norms. Utah makes marriage more common than
Speaker 2: anywhere else. You know.
Speaker 1: You sent this post to me and when I saw it,
Speaker 1: I went to go google. Are people in Utah generally pretty?
Speaker 1: And they actually? You know, because I was thinking, like,
Speaker 1: you know, I started his post on Instagram one day
Speaker 1: and I don't know what I can't remember what city
Speaker 1: it was, but he was like, man, everybody in the
Speaker 1: city ugly.
Speaker 2: How about Columbia? So I'm Carolina.
Speaker 1: No, Colombia is not ugly. People in Columbia are not ugly.
Speaker 2: So but remember that man was like, yo, I'm in
Speaker 2: Colombia and all these bitches is ugly and they ate
Speaker 2: him up.
Speaker 1: Oh we had him on the show, I remember. But meanwhile,
Speaker 1: you're looking like, I don't know, doctor Umar reject, Like
Speaker 1: you look like a doctor Umar reject, right, Like.
Speaker 2: How do you do that? And they call it somebody ugly?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Columbia has very beautiful people. But I can't remember
Speaker 1: what city this person was in, but he was just like,
Speaker 1: I see why everybody coupled up here. Everybody ugly. So
Speaker 1: that's what I was thinking about Utah. But apparently Utah
Speaker 1: is like number twelve on the list for most beautiful people.
Speaker 2: So maybe that's where I need to go. Looking from
Speaker 2: our partner.
Speaker 1: You gonna get your partner for sure, a partner in Utah.
Speaker 1: I don't know who the fuck is living in Utah.
Speaker 1: Maybe they got a good military base with some niggas
Speaker 1: hidden over there. See about it, Yeah, Utah. So another
Speaker 1: study shows by age thirty five, many women have stopped
Speaker 1: chasing fairy tale expectations and instead they seek peace and
Speaker 1: financial stability from their relationships. Study shows it says by
Speaker 1: the time they reach their their mid thirties, a lot
Speaker 1: of women begin to shift their focus away from intense, drama,
Speaker 1: fhill passion passionate relationships and instead look for something more grounded, peace, stability,
Speaker 1: and real partnership. After years of dating and going through
Speaker 1: different phases of life, their outlook naturally matures. Instead of
Speaker 1: chasing fleeting excitement, many now seek emotionally healthy connections, absolutely
Speaker 1: strong compatibility, and financial dadiness. Okay, that is very important.
Speaker 2: It's so funny because I was on the phone with
Speaker 2: our producer Taylor yesterday and I was just talking about
Speaker 2: this nigga ot and uh gave back to the streets
Speaker 2: and she was like, you know, talking to me about
Speaker 2: like the fairy don't you want the fairy tale? And
Speaker 2: I was like, I don't believe in that no more.
Speaker 2: And she was like I was like, girl, yes, I
Speaker 2: don't believe in no fairy tale in it no more.
Speaker 2: What I want is And it's so funny because the
Speaker 2: things that are listening listen here is exactly what I said.
Speaker 1: Let me finish up the things like. It says, things
Speaker 1: like emotional intelligence, shared values, in common direction, and life
Speaker 1: start to matter more than chemistry alone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's why it's so funny you said this, because
Speaker 2: I was just having that conversation like I don't need
Speaker 2: all of that no more. I don't even want no
Speaker 2: fine nigga, no more like fine, ben off the list
Speaker 2: of what I want. I mean, don't get me wrong.
Speaker 2: I take a but it's not on the top of.
Speaker 1: You take a little fine shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah I was. I take a little five ship now.
Speaker 1: But it says the change isn't about giving up or settling.
Speaker 1: It's an intentional choice. Experts say that this shift is
Speaker 1: influenced by everything from social excuse me, from societal pressure
Speaker 1: and biological clocks to professional goals. So for many women,
Speaker 1: it's about finding lasting happiness in a sense of security.
Speaker 1: And I think that because women are, you know, putting
Speaker 1: their happiness at the forefront. You don't a set a
Speaker 1: lot of things, especially when you're happy with yourself like you,
Speaker 1: then you know your self esteem is up. I say
Speaker 1: this all the time. People date based on their self esteem. Recently,
Speaker 1: Decisions Decisions is on the Breakfast Club, you know, and
Speaker 1: we did one of our earlier shows with them, and
Speaker 1: we talked about this and maybe on this episode, right,
Speaker 1: maybe I don't know. On another episode we talked about
Speaker 1: how that hole and don't heal like now older? Right,
Speaker 1: we were older than them, obviously we're older than them,
Speaker 1: but I was trying to tell them the future. Then
Speaker 1: they didn't get it because they were still having fun outside. Right.
Speaker 1: But you will come to a point where none of
Speaker 1: this shit matters and you're gonna look back at your
Speaker 1: old self, like, what the fuck was I doing? And
Speaker 1: why the fuck was I fuck with these people? These
Speaker 1: niggas can't now see my pussy today? Yeah, A J.
Speaker 2: Asked me about this guy she saw at the party
Speaker 2: that I used to date. She was like, remember that, God,
Speaker 2: I was like who she was like describing him? And
Speaker 2: I kept saying, who bitch, And she's like, are you serious?
Speaker 2: Or you do you know who I'm talking about? I said, oh, bitch,
Speaker 2: cause you.
Speaker 1: Did that the last time I asked about that dude
Speaker 1: because I saw him another time.
Speaker 2: Who knows?
Speaker 1: Yeah, man, So we started, like you know, you just
Speaker 1: start prioritizing different things in life, Like you know, I
Speaker 1: still want to find little shit because I don't have
Speaker 1: any kids. I want to make sure I got a
Speaker 1: super fine kid. You know, I'm not that selfish.
Speaker 2: I don't care about fine.
Speaker 1: I don't care.
Speaker 2: I don't want no ugly ass nigga, but I don't
Speaker 2: want I don't care about him.
Speaker 1: You gotta be fine to me. Yeah, to me, that's
Speaker 1: all that matters. I don't revamp my whole LOWD list,
Speaker 1: right the things I'm trying to manifest in a partner.
Speaker 2: I care more about fitness now than the.
Speaker 1: Fine exactly exactly. I get on my ass, let's go
Speaker 1: to the gym, let's do all the things. And then also,
Speaker 1: you know, what's really important to me is like diet,
Speaker 1: because I don't feel like having to cook somebody something different,
Speaker 1: like I need people to be on my diet. I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: and it's people out there on my same diets where
Speaker 1: I don't got to touch chicken for them or touch
Speaker 1: a piece of steak. They gonna eat. What the fuck
Speaker 1: I eat? I need a little baby, ask and listen.
Speaker 2: Because I want a piece of steak, give.
Speaker 1: Me, Well, you go out and get it. I shouldn't
Speaker 1: have to touch it, because it's more real spiritual for me,
Speaker 1: like the consumption of meat. I don't want to shit.
Speaker 1: I'm leaning towards like I'm trying to really stop eating seafood,
Speaker 1: but it's just so hard because I'm a fishead from Charleston,
Speaker 1: South Carolina. It's hard for me not to eat seafood,
Speaker 1: but I'm do it one day.
Speaker 2: You're a chickenhead. I don't know how this hample to you.
Speaker 1: I'm a fish head. You a chicken head. I don't
Speaker 1: know what you what y'all got in Columbia? What Columbia got?
Speaker 2: What do you mean?
Speaker 1: Like? What is Columbia like known for aside from being
Speaker 1: the capital.
Speaker 2: I was just thinking the Confederate flagshit, Like what y'all
Speaker 2: got the flag?
Speaker 1: What the fuck else is going on Columbia? Like esthetically
Speaker 1: don't even look good? Like I just always was depressed.
Speaker 1: The landscape isn't nice.
Speaker 2: There's shining faces and beautiful places.
Speaker 1: Like, what the fuck is the trees and the flowers?
Speaker 1: And shit? We got palm trees and Charleston.
Speaker 2: Okay, where is the Yeah, where is the palmtal tree
Speaker 2: that they always talking about on the flag? Y'all?
Speaker 1: Damn in the middle of the state. Y'all ain't got nothing.
Speaker 1: Y'all ain't by the water.
Speaker 2: Yeah, speaking a little fine shit, let's get into it.
Speaker 2: We'll be right back. I ain't seen aj Sis April
Speaker 2: in person, like we get together. We record every week,
Speaker 2: but it's been audio. We're back filming. As soon as
Speaker 2: she walks in the door, she don't even say hi
Speaker 2: to me. Y'all.
Speaker 1: She says, you look like a dyke. I said a
Speaker 1: little bit more high pitched though, Like nice though.
Speaker 2: Say how you said it?
Speaker 1: You ain't a dyke.
Speaker 2: I'm chilling. It's a big chilling vibes.
Speaker 1: It's hot. We don't never coordinate. That's a problem. See,
Speaker 1: i'd be oneing like maybe I should have this on
Speaker 1: my wrists, right, So you want to dress alike, not
Speaker 1: dress alike, but coordinate, like we really like two different people. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, but we can still like be cohesive a
Speaker 1: little bit. You know, that's my favorite.
Speaker 2: We are cohesive this I only packed dress one hundred
Speaker 2: thousand degrees outside.
Speaker 1: You got a sweat past, So what are we talking about?
Speaker 1: That's all I got loose. I thought you had just
Speaker 1: off the road or something. Let's let's get in a
Speaker 1: five shy month. It's pride month.
Speaker 2: It is shout out the prime month. But I'm not gay.
Speaker 2: But I love him today because it's Sunday. Other than
Speaker 2: that that asked me, I am not those promote that,
Speaker 2: all right, I won't.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry anyway, y'll you know what I want to
Speaker 1: talk about today because I am having a lot of
Speaker 1: I feel like we both right, alright, we have a
Speaker 1: lot of transitioning going on in life right now. And
Speaker 1: y'all know we like real young too. But I don't know,
Speaker 1: I feel like at this age, you still end up
Speaker 1: in these these situationships with people. I know.
Speaker 2: Listen, the last ten years, it's been a see all
Speaker 2: of them. I haven't had like a solid that's my man,
Speaker 2: my man and my man. No, it's been situationships.
Speaker 1: I haven't had a situationship in a long time. I
Speaker 1: always end up in relationships. But I'm like, do I
Speaker 1: need it a situationship?
Speaker 2: I think yeah, I think you should like calm down
Speaker 2: on claiming a nigga so quick.
Speaker 1: At this age, at this young age.
Speaker 2: Because you just need to I like, just see what
Speaker 2: it is, you know.
Speaker 1: I don't thought that type of time but for the
Speaker 1: younger folks. But I feel like we at this nice age,
Speaker 1: we still end up in situationships. And what qualifies as
Speaker 1: a situationship in today's dating whatever we got going.
Speaker 2: On, So chat GPT did not answer the question for us,
Speaker 2: So let me tell you what I think.
Speaker 1: Listen.
Speaker 2: I think a situationship is a relationship without any real
Speaker 2: boundaries or parameters or like title. That's all the situationship is.
Speaker 2: Y'all in a relationship, but y'all don't give it a title.
Speaker 1: So my definition of situationship because one person is probably
Speaker 1: in a relationship. Any other person is in a situationship.
Speaker 1: A lot of times when people start labeling things as
Speaker 1: a situationship, one person usually doesn't know where they are
Speaker 1: and they want to be in a relationship, but the
Speaker 1: other person is essentially putting them into a situationship.
Speaker 2: No, they're not committing It depends It depends because it
Speaker 2: could be like two single people, or it could be
Speaker 2: one single person and want somebody that's in a relationship already,
Speaker 2: or it could be somebody in jail, it is somebody
Speaker 2: free like, it could be all kinds of things that
Speaker 2: make it a situationship. And that's why they don't put
Speaker 2: a title on it, because they can't or they don't
Speaker 2: want to.
Speaker 1: I think oftentimes one already wants to put a tie
Speaker 1: on it, right. I think sometimes people are escaping like
Speaker 1: having to be like really like intimate, you know, having
Speaker 1: to express real intimacy with somebody, So they put them
Speaker 1: in this situation box where they're left in limbo and
Speaker 1: don't really know if they're in a relationship with this
Speaker 1: person not. But y'all doing all the things. See, I
Speaker 1: went from a city, yes bitch, you are, and I
Speaker 1: literally went from a situationship straight into an engagement. And
Speaker 1: this person really didn't consider us being in a relationship
Speaker 1: until he gave me a ring. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: Anybody that's manipulation, right, that's retarded?
Speaker 2: Can I say that, Yes?
Speaker 1: You can? Trump is president, you can stay retarded. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's just hated. But it left me feeling like, am
Speaker 1: I tripping? Like because in his mind, I believe he
Speaker 1: thinks because you know, he didn't have to be he
Speaker 1: doesn't have to be accountable the things he did prior
Speaker 1: to the engagement, right, all the fucked up things. We
Speaker 1: really wasn't together when that happened, but we was building
Speaker 1: businesses that we were absolutely together. So this is why
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Oftentimes one person is in a relationship, they
Speaker 1: define the thing that they have going on as a relationship,
Speaker 1: but the other person gets to say, well, I just
Speaker 1: real murky.
Speaker 2: I prefer I have been known to prefer.
Speaker 1: A situationship. No, I don't prefer. I don't like me
Speaker 1: is just so boxed.
Speaker 2: It has been so boxed in for me, I start
Speaker 2: feeling like claustrophobic and like I can't breathe.
Speaker 1: You know, maybe I'd be like that too, And that's
Speaker 1: why it's just it's almost like at two years, I
Speaker 1: get kind of antsy mm hmm, I get kind of like.
Speaker 2: So you start feeling like you're ready to leave? Yes,
Speaker 2: I start feeling stuff, That's what I'm saying. Like I
Speaker 2: started as soon as we start talking about like being exclusive,
Speaker 2: That's when I start feeling like and it's just just.
Speaker 1: Way before two years at least, I'm in the relationship
Speaker 1: and you're feeling stuffy. You like, soon then they can
Speaker 1: start talking about a relationship about it, and.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what do you think that's about?
Speaker 1: Though we already talked about this, Timmy, you like the
Speaker 1: unavailability of people. I think you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So I don't know, and I might also I might
Speaker 1: be the same way, right, but I'll stay in a
Speaker 1: thing a little bit longer than you do.
Speaker 2: But that's not true. I just don't put a name
Speaker 2: on it.
Speaker 1: That's a fact.
Speaker 2: I just don't put a title on it. I just
Speaker 2: I struggle with that. Once we start putting titles on it,
Speaker 2: it just starts getting that's so masculine of me. I
Speaker 2: feel like, though, I feel like that's that's something a
Speaker 2: man would say and not a woman. Typically a woman
Speaker 2: is the one who's like, but this has been my
Speaker 2: entire life, every like serious with relationship I've ever had.
Speaker 2: I was given an ultimatum commit olie. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Interesting the two times I always tell you you a
Speaker 1: boy and here you are Elliott shirts.
Speaker 2: So what sweaty is? And I feel comfortable?
Speaker 1: Fuck that.
Speaker 2: All right, So why are they so common now? Because
Speaker 2: I feel like.
Speaker 1: I think social media and dating apps, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, Like it's just hook up. It's just like
Speaker 1: a hook up society essentially now, Like people are so
Speaker 1: people think everybody's just so replaceable, Like Instagram is a
Speaker 1: whole holo dex So the minute this one act up,
Speaker 1: you can just go in there and scroll scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll,
Speaker 1: throw the fishing line out there and see who catch.
Speaker 2: I enjoyed the variety of new people, but I don't
Speaker 2: want to have sex with them. Like if I could
Speaker 2: have like multiple boyfriends that I didn't have to sleep with,
Speaker 2: that would be ideal for me because I enjoy like
Speaker 2: the company. I enjoy the perspective of new people, but
Speaker 2: I just don't want everybody did.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, we talk about nominogamy and polygamy and
Speaker 1: all those things. I just don't know. How do you
Speaker 1: how do you learn? Right if you are restricted to
Speaker 1: this same person for the rest of your life, Like,
Speaker 1: how do you get new information and new ideas? You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Because some things have to come
Speaker 1: with a little bit more intimacy, Like some conversations you
Speaker 1: might have with people.
Speaker 2: But then there's something beautiful about finding that one person.
Speaker 1: You know nothing about that. I said, it's one of us.
Speaker 2: I said, there's something beautiful about I've seen it, you know,
Speaker 2: like growing finding that one person and y'all grow old together,
Speaker 2: and then that's beautiful. Like I like my ex boyfriends.
Speaker 2: Aren't her and her husband they're in the cutest thing.
Speaker 2: I haven't seen him in a while, but they're still together.
Speaker 2: He still get jealous, like he still love her so
Speaker 2: much and she loved him, and they're so cute. You know,
Speaker 2: that's so cute. But I just feel like it's hard
Speaker 2: to come by that now.
Speaker 1: They know.
Speaker 2: Ever since listen, since Remy and past Poos broke up,
Speaker 2: I just feel like everybody do.
Speaker 1: Man. They definitely I thought that was.
Speaker 2: Gonna stay again as that could stay, huh.
Speaker 1: It was definitely never a couple, not a couple of goals,
Speaker 1: but like out of prison, that's all he did.
Speaker 2: I just thought they were like very like urban and
Speaker 2: cute and like locked in with each other no matter what.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Mike like Ahs like the Hardships, my
Speaker 1: ultimate like ghetto love story love couple. I like Gucci
Speaker 1: Maine and Kishi Kor, Like I felt like they established like, oh,
Speaker 1: niggas about to start getting married. Gucci don't got married.
Speaker 1: May are about this black men are about to start
Speaker 1: guessing an example more because Gucci main got married and
Speaker 1: to glow up, you know what I'm saying, Like he
Speaker 1: came home a whole nother person. Some people think literally.
Speaker 2: He was not himself, but yeah, okay, that's a good example.
Speaker 2: But they were similar, maybe not as glamorous as Keisha
Speaker 2: Kor and Gucci, but like just a beautiful urban couple.
Speaker 1: That was locked in. No, I don't like that word urban.
Speaker 2: I'm just trying to be like carrag so niggas, so
Speaker 2: niggas that was locked in with each other, and I
Speaker 2: just I enjoyed the seeing that. And it wasn't the
Speaker 2: man that went to jail. It was the woman. That's
Speaker 2: what made it different. You know, like he held her
Speaker 2: down while she was in jail.
Speaker 1: And that's why I feel like a lot of men
Speaker 1: probably don't have respect for Pappus. You see all the
Speaker 1: jokes online. It's like he like he's the woman and
Speaker 1: he likes these tough He likes tough women, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So do he like tough women for
Speaker 1: a man to be just your woman is in prison
Speaker 1: for shooting somebody, like you didn't do that type of time.
Speaker 1: Your girl didn't and you waited for her like that
Speaker 1: is what.
Speaker 2: You waited for her, Like you said it like very
Speaker 2: like that's condescending of him.
Speaker 1: Gender roll flop flip flu fuck.
Speaker 2: It is because his new cheek kill whoop ass? When
Speaker 2: ain't gonna talk about her too much? She can fight,
Speaker 2: I'm not skinned. It also, Remy obviously has guns. She
Speaker 2: can fight.
Speaker 1: Who's trying to fight? So have you ever been in
Speaker 1: a situationship and like couldn't leave it because of emotions?
Speaker 2: Yes, I just got out of a situationship that I
Speaker 2: was in for a long long time. And I still
Speaker 2: think about him all the time. But I had to
Speaker 2: get up out of her. I broke my foot behind
Speaker 2: that ship, y'all. I broke my foot behind that ship.
Speaker 2: And that's when I was like, all right, you know what,
Speaker 2: girls start, go go and get your life together. So
Speaker 2: but it's like, it's a what's the word I'm looking for.
Speaker 2: It's a soul tar. Sometimes you have a soul tar
Speaker 2: with someone and you just gotta untether and that shit
Speaker 2: be hard, and that ain't nothing but the devil, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like anything confusing is the devil. If
Speaker 1: I'm in any any situation and I don't know exactly
Speaker 1: what's going on, it got it like only the devil
Speaker 1: will be trying to confuse you like that. So why
Speaker 1: would anybody want to be engaging with anyone and not
Speaker 1: just tell them what's up? Hey, I want to fuck sometimes?
Speaker 1: You know, I was dating somebody who was too honest, right,
Speaker 1: See that's the problem.
Speaker 2: You wanted to get ass honest. But then you're talking
Speaker 2: about he too honest?
Speaker 1: Like I would call him like you want to do
Speaker 1: something like I want to come over and he and
Speaker 1: he would say shit like I kind of want to,
Speaker 1: but then I don't.
Speaker 2: And how would you receive that? Because what does that mean?
Speaker 1: What the fuck does that mean? You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So when he started liking me more, right.
Speaker 2: When the tables turned, I always.
Speaker 1: Kind of like at I was at the tail end
Speaker 1: of the bullshit at that point. I was tired of
Speaker 1: being in a being in a situation with somebody like
Speaker 1: that's not even courting at that point, because we like
Speaker 1: a year and a half locked in you don't have
Speaker 1: been to my mama house. We'd be chilling. You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. We're doing the nasty.
Speaker 2: Oh, I know who you're talking about.
Speaker 1: I'm taking your places, pulling out with your ass and
Speaker 1: Chelsea boots. Oh, Chelsea, don't.
Speaker 2: Don't fuck with no niggas who wear Chelsea boots. Okay,
Speaker 2: niggas sent me a picture this weekend with Chelsea boots
Speaker 2: on the boots on the ground. Because he was.
Speaker 1: Get so, I was always feeling confused and I couldn't
Speaker 1: really check him on stuff because you left.
Speaker 2: The door open and he was honest and you were
Speaker 2: he was honest.
Speaker 1: He's single, and so am I essentially. But when I
Speaker 1: started like just hanging out a little bit extra or
Speaker 1: not being as available, he actually told me like he
Speaker 1: don't like how he feels. Well, I have been feeling
Speaker 1: like that for a year and a half and we
Speaker 1: could have been together building a whole life. But obviously
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's not too late, child, Lease it
Speaker 1: is too late. Okay, it is too fucking late. I'll
Speaker 1: play around a little bit.
Speaker 2: But I'm just scared I'm gonna choose the wrong person
Speaker 2: and end up by like I feel like if I
Speaker 2: don't like start going to therapy and like working through.
Speaker 1: I let you go to therapy. I stopped why.
Speaker 2: Because my therapist became my homeboy, and it just was
Speaker 2: like our relationship changed, our dynamic change, so I can't
Speaker 2: can't be my therapist became my homeboy, you know, and
Speaker 2: we started talking outside of therapy, and it just no
Speaker 2: longer became uh a safe space. And that's why that's
Speaker 2: why he was giving me free therapy. No, he was
Speaker 2: giving me excellent therapy. But and he still does a
Speaker 2: little bit, but it's not like you know, ongoing therapy
Speaker 2: and like working through things. And I need that because
Speaker 2: I know I'm a commitment fold and I know that
Speaker 2: I have like like even I love my hair in locks,
Speaker 2: but I will not put my hair in locks because
Speaker 2: I can't commit. Yeah, it's just too like start hyperventilating.
Speaker 2: I'm stuck into something, you know. And that's just how
Speaker 2: my relationships have been my entire life. And I don't
Speaker 2: know with men. I will commit to females, not in
Speaker 2: a lesbian way, happy prima, not in a lesbian way,
Speaker 2: but like in friendships for life, I'll be like we
Speaker 2: locked in for life Ashley we aj we locked in
Speaker 2: for life. I can say that, I can say that,
Speaker 2: you know, in perpetuity, but with these men, I'd be like, shit,
Speaker 2: you cool, you know, and I don't know what that
Speaker 2: might be, like a daddy issue or I don't know
Speaker 2: what that is.
Speaker 1: Why is today? I think it's just you know, you
Speaker 1: you're in relationships with people and you start learning things
Speaker 1: like every relationship. Like the other night, I sat down,
Speaker 1: Remember we have our list of the kind of I'm
Speaker 1: going through a breakup right now, y'all. Okay, it's been
Speaker 1: going on for months, and I revamped my thing based
Speaker 1: because I have new data now, new information. I know
Speaker 1: more things I don't like now, I know more things
Speaker 1: I would like now, you know, out of a partner.
Speaker 1: And I don't think these look like y'all can make
Speaker 1: a list. I don't think it's outlandish, like to have real,
Speaker 1: like specific characteristics of the type of person you want,
Speaker 1: even if people may call it shallow, I don't know,
Speaker 1: put it down, write the shit down, you know. But
Speaker 1: there's like new things now that I've discovered over the
Speaker 1: last year and a half that I need out of
Speaker 1: a partner. Like it's I got super non negotiable.
Speaker 2: Have you discovered things that you need to be as
Speaker 2: a partner?
Speaker 1: Absolutely, And I also discover things I'm just not as
Speaker 1: a partner. You know what I'm saying. I'm not the
Speaker 1: most thoughtful person, and I've.
Speaker 2: Really that it's so crazy.
Speaker 1: But I definitely show up for people in a million
Speaker 1: other ways. So like, I know, I'm not the like
Speaker 1: the friend who going to see some shit and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: actually might like that, or telling you might like that
Speaker 1: and I would buy it. It depends maybe sometimes right
Speaker 1: or shut up, I probably watch you some shit. I
Speaker 1: not bought a bit some shit before. I've never bought
Speaker 1: you nothing. Okay, I'm gonna sene you the Costal Canna
Speaker 1: because y'all I would sa Costco like last week and
Speaker 1: they do still have them candos I've been see but
Speaker 1: my mama took me on the shopping spirit of Costco
Speaker 1: for my birthday.
Speaker 2: Although you saw my candle, you just kept on walking.
Speaker 1: You know why, because I couldn't leave that big ass
Speaker 1: candle in the car because Melt and I live on
Speaker 1: the third floor. So like, I had a bunch of shit,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. And now add on this
Speaker 1: fucking thirty pound candle. Yeah, but they are in there,
Speaker 1: and I'm buy you a candle. Okay, I'm gonna buy it.
Speaker 2: My birthday is in two weeks.
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm gonna send that candle. Got it?
Speaker 2: All right?
Speaker 1: We're so yeah, I'm not we cooked back, y'all.
Speaker 2: We're gonna see if I got that fucking candle.
Speaker 1: I'm not that thoughtful in a relationship. You know. I
Speaker 1: like flowers. I like flesh flowers, like my dude he
Speaker 1: would bring me. I would have fresh flower.
Speaker 2: Oh, let me interjet. Have you used any other ship
Speaker 2: that I haven't bought? You like them books in them
Speaker 2: journals and you.
Speaker 1: Bought me two journals. You bought me a Gratitude journal,
Speaker 1: which I probably have like six entries from that.
Speaker 2: Year, and so toy twenty one.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's it right.
Speaker 2: No, I bought you another another journal. It was like
Speaker 2: a daily planner.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah you did. It's a little black one.
Speaker 1: So it's on the side of my bed next to
Speaker 1: all the other ship that I don't be using. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I do have a spell book I write and
Speaker 1: that ship all the time. That's it. I know what
Speaker 1: to get you mixed and it's leather bound.
Speaker 2: Go on contibity bubbity boot bitch. Listen y'all when I
Speaker 2: walked in. Also, she gonna say bibbity bobbity pebbage. Take
Speaker 2: that shit off.
Speaker 1: Because what is happening?
Speaker 2: No, I'm chilling today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I don't know. I learned, Uh, I do
Speaker 1: have Everybody comes with bullshit. I definitely don't want a
Speaker 1: situationship for any next anything. And I'm really not even uh.
Speaker 2: It's hot outside.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't really feel like men right now. I
Speaker 1: really don't.
Speaker 2: So you don't want no man for the summer?
Speaker 1: No, I don't no not to need a man for
Speaker 1: the summer because I want to be pregnant by the
Speaker 1: end of the year. I don't know how that's supposed
Speaker 1: to work. So you don't want to go on a vacations, Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm going on some type of something.
Speaker 2: So you gotta have you, You gotta have somebody to do.
Speaker 1: It would have to be a situationship. It could be
Speaker 1: a friend. I feel like situationships come with a lot
Speaker 1: of emotions.
Speaker 2: So hold on, wait, wait when you say a friend,
Speaker 2: what's the difference are you gonna if you go on
Speaker 2: a vacation.
Speaker 1: Typically vacations clue a male friend that you're having sex with.
Speaker 2: So that's the situationship. No, I don't mean, what's the difference.
Speaker 1: That's why I think that situationships this is a totally
Speaker 1: different thing. Situationships come with emotion and it's usually one person.
Speaker 2: You can have a like, it could be a situation.
Speaker 2: It depends on what the situation is. So you can
Speaker 2: have a guy like I know a girl like one
Speaker 2: of my hair clients, she got a guy who she
Speaker 2: deal with. She got a man, he got a girlfriend.
Speaker 2: They see each other out in the club and they together,
Speaker 2: they hook up, and then they go they separate ways,
Speaker 2: and they do that all the time.
Speaker 1: I don't think that's the situationship. I just think that
Speaker 1: they're they're too adults who enjoy having sex with each other,
Speaker 1: Like that's the situation. No, I think yeah, and then
Speaker 1: and they like link that's they that's their situationship. You
Speaker 1: said it's deeper, it gotta be deeper. I think it is.
Speaker 2: No, it don't, it really don't. It just depends on
Speaker 2: what the situation is.
Speaker 1: A lot of times people be in situations I.
Speaker 2: Feel like you gotta the only the only thing you
Speaker 2: gotta be doing to be included in the situationship. It
Speaker 2: has to happen frequent, and you gotta be having sex.
Speaker 2: And that's the situationship. And it's just different situations. What's
Speaker 2: the situation y'all not together, y'all having sex frequently? What's
Speaker 2: the situation?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't think. I just I think
Speaker 1: I have a different idea in my mind about what
Speaker 1: that thing is. So you got to be I think
Speaker 1: men benefit more from situationships women be wanting. I feel
Speaker 1: like it's limbo. You're stuck in a live and and
Speaker 1: and uh, you're stuck in like purgatory relationship. Purgatory essentially.
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, you want, But not every
Speaker 2: woman wants to be with that nigga they're in a
Speaker 2: situationship or man that they're in a situationship with.
Speaker 1: You don't really want to have at this big age,
Speaker 1: I do not want to have sex with somebody that
Speaker 1: I don't like or I don't see the futureship with
Speaker 1: you're saying. That's why I said, I like variety, but
Speaker 1: I don't want to sleep with all these people. I
Speaker 1: don't want to sleep with none of I just want
Speaker 1: their energy. Oh, I mean energy suck. Yeah, I want to,
Speaker 1: like I want to. I want to be in there,
Speaker 1: like I want the vibes.
Speaker 2: I create vibes. Though I create vibes, I bring good energy,
Speaker 2: and I be wanting to be around good energy. But
Speaker 2: I enjoy variety, you know, in different perspectives.
Speaker 1: Mmmm, I don't know what. I guess that that would
Speaker 1: be just be dating. I wouldn't I enjoy dating. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's dating, you know, like, and you should date, right,
Speaker 1: And I think more women should date and not be
Speaker 1: having sex. You don't have to have sex with everybody
Speaker 1: you hanging out with.
Speaker 2: Listen, I don't have sex with nobody. It was so funny.
Speaker 2: I was with my you know, I'm not even gonna
Speaker 2: tell that story, no telling, No, I'm not, because that's
Speaker 2: what I really enjoy their company. I don'tant to even
Speaker 2: share that business on here.
Speaker 1: Do you think a situationship could ever become like a
Speaker 1: healthy relationship? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Absolutely. Sometimes it's just like two people having fun and
Speaker 2: then it turns into something else, it turns into more.
Speaker 1: You don't think it could happen. It does happen.
Speaker 2: One of my friends right now, she's with it, locked
Speaker 2: in and they got two kids. It was a situationship.
Speaker 2: They would like just be like travel buddies. They meet
Speaker 2: different places around the world, you know, vacation they were
Speaker 2: like vacation friends. That's what they would do. And then
Speaker 2: she got pregnant and then she had a baby, and
Speaker 2: they still wasn't like when she got pregnant, I don't
Speaker 2: feel like they was like really locked in like that.
Speaker 2: You know, they fucked with each other hard, but and
Speaker 2: then all of it just turned into something more. And
Speaker 2: now they're a family and they have a beautiful family
Speaker 2: and they're happy together.
Speaker 1: And that was a situation ship. Was she talking to
Speaker 1: other people? Was he talking to other people?
Speaker 2: We don't know, We don't Yeah, she was talking to
Speaker 2: other people, Like, yeah, she was dating and I think
Speaker 2: he was too, you know, but they were just like
Speaker 2: they had enjoyed it. And that thing went on for
Speaker 2: like eight years before she got pregnant him, before she
Speaker 2: got pregnant by him, I know. And now they got
Speaker 2: a beautiful family. So it can happen. It has happened,
Speaker 2: It does happen.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't think I can be in
Speaker 1: limbo too long with somebody, Like I've definitely done it.
Speaker 1: And when you when you want more, you want stability.
Speaker 1: I don't. I'd be wanting to, Like I always say,
Speaker 1: I like to feel single in relationships, but I don't
Speaker 1: really like to be single.
Speaker 2: So you think it I'm the reader hearing it says
Speaker 2: the emotional burnout of being almost loved. So you think,
Speaker 2: like situationships is almost low.
Speaker 1: Yes, I do, I think, And that's why I said.
Speaker 1: I think men and men benefit more from situationships because
Speaker 1: they don't have that. They don't have to deal with
Speaker 1: the emotions of a woman, right, they can just say, hey,
Speaker 1: excuse me, sweetie, we not together like that, Yeah, we
Speaker 1: smashing raw.
Speaker 2: But that's you say that, Like the situationships are always
Speaker 2: because there's a woman who wants to be with this
Speaker 2: man and it's not the case.
Speaker 1: What's the percentage? What is the percentage? It's so many
Speaker 1: fucking flute fries fruit flies flying around in the here.
Speaker 2: I know, what is it?
Speaker 1: What is the percentage? Then? Because I think like it's
Speaker 1: a high percentage of women who are stuck in relationship
Speaker 1: situationship purgatory. Then men, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think especially these young girls, these
Speaker 2: young girls is out here not caring. They really don't care.
Speaker 2: I care too, That's why I do. That's why, and
Speaker 2: that's why I don't. I don't be fucking like that
Speaker 2: because I like we fucking I'm in love, like we
Speaker 2: go together. I don't want to be I want to
Speaker 2: be with you. So that's why I don't do it
Speaker 2: no more.
Speaker 1: I stopped.
Speaker 2: Like once I turned thirty two years ago. It's shit whatever,
Speaker 2: Just stop doing that because it's just something about sleeping
Speaker 2: with someone and sharing your body for me. It just
Speaker 2: I feel connected.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: No, you don't feel that connectional.
Speaker 1: So we put a little poll. I'm trying to see
Speaker 1: if we got any any responses. I wanted to hear
Speaker 1: about other people's situationships, y'all, I would love we like
Speaker 1: to hear other people's business. Okay, so call us. You
Speaker 1: don't like you don't like being nosy. I like it.
Speaker 2: I get tired.
Speaker 1: I like it. I get tired, y'all call it, call it,
Speaker 1: call us and tell us about your situationships called nine one, nine, four, ten,
Speaker 1: seventy seven, thirty five, and tell me all your motherfucking business.
Speaker 2: Listen, you got three minutes before it's gonna hang up
Speaker 2: on you, and you got a call back, so put
Speaker 2: your timer on or something.
Speaker 1: I think situationships are dangerous. I feel like everybody should
Speaker 1: stay the fuck up out of them. Children come through situationships.
Speaker 1: We need you don't You need children with both family,
Speaker 1: both people in the household. When children are born out
Speaker 1: of side situations and situationships, it is a strenuous relationship
Speaker 1: at that point between these two adult It's not Nothing
Speaker 1: good comes out of situationships.
Speaker 2: I mean, I get what you're saying, but I mean,
Speaker 2: in twenty twenty.
Speaker 1: Five, get off the damn dating apps. Go out.
Speaker 2: There is a lot of I mean there, let's be honest.
Speaker 2: The black family unit has changed. The dynamic is different.
Speaker 2: You know, a lot of black families are in different homes,
Speaker 2: They're not in the same household.
Speaker 1: And where is that getting us? We are fucked up?
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, but that's the reality of things.
Speaker 1: Though, you know, it doesn't have to be the reality
Speaker 1: of things. I'm for people not being in situationships, like
Speaker 1: actually date people you know, and actually get into actual
Speaker 1: real relationships. Start your families, do things the right way.
Speaker 1: Like you know, I'm not no super religious person, right,
Speaker 1: but the Bible basic instructions before leaving earth right. The
Speaker 1: Bible does give you a pretty nice instruction guide on
Speaker 1: high to live so you don't get fucked up, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. Like it's still got some botion,
Speaker 1: and they're like, you know, you're not supposed to fortunicate
Speaker 1: with your neighbor's wife, but don't say nothing about the
Speaker 1: bitch around the corner, so you will still do.
Speaker 2: It says don't fornicate period until you're married. I mean,
Speaker 2: we're going if we're going biblical.
Speaker 1: And it says nothing about Mary for love either. It
Speaker 1: says if you can't sustain from not having sex anymore thing,
Speaker 1: you should find a wife. So I don't know, I
Speaker 1: just feel like people are I'm I'm stressed out about
Speaker 1: the black community right now. I'm not black, nom more, y'all.
Speaker 1: I forgot to tell y'all, I'm gold with a little degreen.
Speaker 2: So listen, how you stressed out about a community you
Speaker 2: don't even belong to it anymore?
Speaker 1: The word uh not expatriate. I have uh not excommunicated.
Speaker 2: Your expet from the black community.
Speaker 1: Not expat I'm looking for h I have divested. No,
Speaker 1: I'm not divested.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say now you divested from the black community.
Speaker 2: It's crazy.
Speaker 1: No, I'm not I divested, but I just it's a
Speaker 1: lot of things that we got going on. I just
Speaker 1: don't agree with you, know what I'm saying. So listen,
Speaker 1: if you.
Speaker 2: Are so situationships are one of them. You think that
Speaker 2: relationship or the hooked up culture gotta stop. It's so
Speaker 2: crazy that you your age now, you know what that
Speaker 2: reminds me of, Like my grandma telling me these are
Speaker 2: last days. And I'm like, Grandma, You're seventy years old
Speaker 2: and now you're talking about it's our last days and
Speaker 2: I'm just a young bud.
Speaker 1: You know why is that you feel with me talking
Speaker 1: to you right now?
Speaker 2: No, I'm saying you talking to the people, not me
Speaker 2: talking to the audience, like saying, you're not being in
Speaker 2: hellas situationships in your life, and now you're telling.
Speaker 1: Hella, I have been in one. I have been Excuse me,
Speaker 1: I've been in two situationships in life. Okay too, Compee girl, Well,
Speaker 1: if if it turns into a relationship, wasn't really a situationship.
Speaker 1: I mean, like I begetting to the end, it was
Speaker 1: never nothing else going on. I'm tired of saying situationship anyway,
Speaker 1: don't uh, y'all.
Speaker 2: When y'all watch this, I want you to watch it
Speaker 2: with your homegirls and take a sip of your drink.
Speaker 2: Every time we say situationship. It shouldn't go out to
Speaker 2: the day party or stuff like that.
Speaker 1: Anyway. What's your last last time?
Speaker 2: Listen? Life is short. Do what makes you happy, you know,
Speaker 2: do it feels good, but just be prepared for the
Speaker 2: consequences of all your choices. That's my last last.
Speaker 1: Y'all. I choose clarity over confusion, because that's all my
Speaker 1: situationships is offering. If you don't know where you stand
Speaker 1: in someone else's life, if you're having a call another
Speaker 1: bitch to ask her if she's fucking with him, fucking
Speaker 1: with this man, you you gotta check in with somebody
Speaker 1: else to see where you stand in this man's life.
Speaker 1: You are and that's super duper situation ship. Get out
Speaker 1: of there, save your life. But all situation girls, shut
Speaker 1: up you a boy anyway, There can be clarity within
Speaker 1: your situation.
Speaker 2: This is what it is.
Speaker 1: I guess anyway, y'all. If you enjoy this episode, y'all
Speaker 1: tune in every Thursday on The Black Effect. iHeart radio app.
Speaker 1: Where the fuck you get your podcast at? This your.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's Sam Mam. I got on T shirt and sweatpants.
Speaker 2: Maybe that's the energy I'm giving today. Maybe I am
Speaker 2: a dyke today.
Speaker 1: Fuck you bitch.
Speaker 2: Remember to speak now and never hold your nuts.
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