1 00:00:01,280 --> 00:00:03,960 Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if 2 00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:08,160 Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more, 3 00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:11,520 Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve RVFM and click 4 00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:15,360 Speaker 1: submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter live 5 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:17,920 Speaker 1: on the air, just like we're going to read this 6 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:20,560 Speaker 1: one right here, right now, and you never know, it 7 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:25,960 Speaker 1: could be yours. That's right, you never know. Hold on tight. 8 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:28,600 Speaker 1: We got it for you here. It is Strawberry Letter. 9 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,880 Speaker 1: Thank you nephew. Subject my husband beat up her boyfriend. 10 00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,120 Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for four years and 11 00:00:36,240 --> 00:00:38,960 Speaker 1: my husband has a bunch of friends and a female 12 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:41,760 Speaker 1: best friend. We're both in our fifties and I don't 13 00:00:41,800 --> 00:00:44,559 Speaker 1: put my friends before him because I am beyond the 14 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:47,479 Speaker 1: age of hanging with my friends all the time. But 15 00:00:47,600 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 1: he is always down to hang out with his friends 16 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:53,360 Speaker 1: or gossip on the phone with his female bestie. I've 17 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 1: caught him on the phone with her at one in 18 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:57,760 Speaker 1: the morning before and I had to give him quote 19 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,880 Speaker 1: the look to get off the phone. The lady is 20 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:03,960 Speaker 1: married and she's got a boyfriend on the side. She 21 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,560 Speaker 1: talks to my husband about her problems with her men 22 00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 1: and I warned him to stay out of her business 23 00:01:08,959 --> 00:01:12,440 Speaker 1: and stop giving her advice. Well, he didn't take any 24 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:14,800 Speaker 1: of my advice, and now he has been charged with 25 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:19,920 Speaker 1: assaulting her boyfriend. Apparently my husband advised her to leave 26 00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:23,560 Speaker 1: her boyfriend alone and focus on saving her marriage. She 27 00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:27,000 Speaker 1: told her boyfriend exactly what my husband said, and then 28 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:30,440 Speaker 1: a few days later, while my husband was pumping gas, 29 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:34,480 Speaker 1: her boyfriend walked up on him. They exchanged words and 30 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:37,440 Speaker 1: my boyfriend my husband ended up clipping the guy and 31 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:40,679 Speaker 1: he fell on the curb and got scratched up. He's 32 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:44,840 Speaker 1: short in comparison to my six three husband, so my 33 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:47,840 Speaker 1: husband tried not to hurt him. I didn't even flinch 34 00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:50,200 Speaker 1: when my husband had to give a statement to the officers, 35 00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:54,240 Speaker 1: because he got exactly what he deserves. I look like 36 00:01:54,280 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 1: a fool to my family since they found out that 37 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: my husband got into a fight over another woman. My 38 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:02,240 Speaker 1: husband argued that he was only trying to be a 39 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:05,160 Speaker 1: good friend. I told him that either she goes or 40 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:08,200 Speaker 1: I am going, and there's no other way. He said 41 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:11,160 Speaker 1: he shouldn't be punished for being a good person. Was 42 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:14,440 Speaker 1: I wrong for giving him an ultimatum? Well, you know what, 43 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:17,560 Speaker 1: there's so much in this letter, and he's definitely not 44 00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:20,640 Speaker 1: being punished for being a good person. He's being punished 45 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 1: for being in other people's business and not doing what 46 00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 1: you clearly and plainly asked him to do, so plain 47 00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:31,799 Speaker 1: and simple. You're right. Your husband is dead wrong. And 48 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,320 Speaker 1: when will these married people get it that it is 49 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:36,880 Speaker 1: not a good look to spend so much time and 50 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,360 Speaker 1: effort with the opposite sex. I mean, this is too much. 51 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,119 Speaker 1: He's not considering your feelings and your marriage at all. 52 00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 1: He has allowed her, the friend, to come between you. 53 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,720 Speaker 1: That's what he's done, and that's wrong. He created a 54 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:52,920 Speaker 1: problem where there was no problem in your marriage, and 55 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 1: he stupidly thinks that he was just being a good person. 56 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:59,760 Speaker 1: Really though, good people don't do stuff like this. He's 57 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:01,880 Speaker 1: all up in her business, talking to her at one 58 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:04,880 Speaker 1: in the morning, getting into fights where the police have 59 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: to get involved. Nothing is worth all this mess and confusion. Dude, 60 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:12,360 Speaker 1: you're gonna lose your wife over this other woman. You 61 00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:16,800 Speaker 1: can't see that he should be concentrating on you your needs. Unfortunately, 62 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,920 Speaker 1: he did get what he deserved and deserved in this instance, 63 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:23,400 Speaker 1: and maybe it will make him slow down and listen 64 00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:25,680 Speaker 1: to and appreciate what you've been trying to tell him 65 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:29,600 Speaker 1: all along. As far as the ultimate ultimatum goes, I say, 66 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:32,120 Speaker 1: don't say stuff like that unless you truly mean it, 67 00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 1: and even if you did meet it, you can always 68 00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 1: take stuff back. But you know, you might have to 69 00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,120 Speaker 1: own this one, because if he's still arguing about him 70 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:42,480 Speaker 1: just trying to be a good person and still being 71 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 1: friends with her and still in her business, he hasn't 72 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,600 Speaker 1: really learned his lesson, and that's going to continue to 73 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:50,280 Speaker 1: be a problem in your marriage. And you're gonna, you know, 74 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:57,160 Speaker 1: have to stick to your ultimatum. Steve Man, I've not 75 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:01,920 Speaker 1: had a letter come cross here in a while with 76 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:08,560 Speaker 1: so many people in it that are wrong. Can I 77 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:16,440 Speaker 1: tell you that everybody mentioned in this letter is stupid? Now, 78 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:20,640 Speaker 1: this is a letter full of stupid people. Everybody in 79 00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:24,159 Speaker 1: this letter is stupid. I don't even understand how we 80 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:27,840 Speaker 1: got into this. This don't make no sense. This woman 81 00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:32,520 Speaker 1: the subject as my husband beat up her boyfriend. You've 82 00:04:32,560 --> 00:04:34,800 Speaker 1: been married for four years. Your husband got a bunch 83 00:04:34,839 --> 00:04:38,039 Speaker 1: of friends and a female best friend. I told you 84 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 1: I told y'all about this. I can't tell you how 85 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:47,520 Speaker 1: many times. But now y'all on this. We're both in 86 00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:50,359 Speaker 1: our fifties. I don't put my friends before him because 87 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:52,720 Speaker 1: I'm beyond age of hanging with my friends all the time. 88 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:56,080 Speaker 1: But he's always down to hang out with his friends 89 00:04:56,920 --> 00:05:01,000 Speaker 1: or gossip on the phone with his female bestie. Right there, 90 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:08,839 Speaker 1: that's crazy. I'm on the phone in my fifties gossiping 91 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:15,599 Speaker 1: with a woman who is my best friend. But I'm mad. Sorry, 92 00:05:16,279 --> 00:05:20,560 Speaker 1: you need in the world so but now I hadn't 93 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:23,000 Speaker 1: told y'all about these, right, and you're fifty on the 94 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:27,240 Speaker 1: phone gossiping with your female girlfriend who is your bestie. 95 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:32,400 Speaker 1: Here is where it gets even dumber. I caught him 96 00:05:32,440 --> 00:05:35,880 Speaker 1: on the phone with her at one o'clock in the 97 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:38,680 Speaker 1: morning before and I had to give him a look 98 00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:42,159 Speaker 1: to get off the phone. I'm not talking to a 99 00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:47,080 Speaker 1: woman at one o'clock in the morning, except but with 100 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:57,240 Speaker 1: one subject. That's it. Ain't nothing else to talk about 101 00:05:57,279 --> 00:06:00,280 Speaker 1: me here to share. Bill Bellamy had rolled the whole 102 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:04,080 Speaker 1: special about it at one am, y'all in boot call 103 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:09,520 Speaker 1: to THEO. When when you were talking with a man 104 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:11,120 Speaker 1: when you was out that day and you was talking 105 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:15,480 Speaker 1: to a man one o'clock in the subject y'all wouldn't 106 00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:27,480 Speaker 1: exchange and wait, wait, yeah, hold that thought coming up. 107 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:30,680 Speaker 1: We'll have part two of Steve's response at twenty three 108 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:34,680 Speaker 1: minutes after the hour. Today's strawberry letter. Subject is my 109 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,080 Speaker 1: husband beat up her boyfriend. All right, we'll get back 110 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:43,920 Speaker 1: into it right after this. You're listening, all right, Steve, 111 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,960 Speaker 1: Come on, let's recap today's strawberry letter. The subject is 112 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:51,080 Speaker 1: my husband beat up her boyfriend. Just don't make no sister. 113 00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:54,480 Speaker 1: This woman been married for four years. Her husband got 114 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 1: a lot of friends and one of them is the 115 00:06:56,320 --> 00:07:02,000 Speaker 1: best friend is a woman. Uh, and they always hanging 116 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 1: out and she's tired of it. And she caught her 117 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:09,680 Speaker 1: husband on the phone at one am in the morning, 118 00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:12,040 Speaker 1: and then she gave him a look to get off 119 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:15,559 Speaker 1: the phone. So she allows him to have this best 120 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:17,840 Speaker 1: friend who is a woman and talk on the phone. 121 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:20,440 Speaker 1: So he's so comfortable he up in one o'clock in 122 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:24,360 Speaker 1: the morning with his girlfriend talking on the phone, because 123 00:07:24,360 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 1: that's where she is. She's a girl and she's a friend. 124 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,000 Speaker 1: And when at this age that puts you in a 125 00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: girlfriend in category. Now the lady that he's talking to 126 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:37,680 Speaker 1: his way get crazy. She married and got a boyfriend. 127 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,560 Speaker 1: So now that should sending a signal to you that 128 00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:47,160 Speaker 1: she has no problem passing it around. None. She got 129 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:51,680 Speaker 1: a husband and a boyfriend, and your husband know it. Now, 130 00:07:51,760 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 1: she talks to your husband about her problems with her men, 131 00:07:55,680 --> 00:07:57,960 Speaker 1: and you've warned him to stay out of her business 132 00:07:57,960 --> 00:08:00,800 Speaker 1: and stop giving her advice. He didn't take the advice, 133 00:08:01,040 --> 00:08:06,720 Speaker 1: and now he's been charged with assaulting her boyfriend. How 134 00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:10,400 Speaker 1: did this happen? Well, I'll tell you what your husband 135 00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:13,520 Speaker 1: told her. Your husband advised her to leave the boyfriend 136 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:18,560 Speaker 1: alone focus on saving her marriage. She told her boyfriend 137 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:22,400 Speaker 1: exactly what my husband said, what you ain't supposed to do, 138 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:26,200 Speaker 1: and a few days later, your husband was pumping gas 139 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,120 Speaker 1: her boyfriend walked up on him. Now this is what 140 00:08:30,280 --> 00:08:35,520 Speaker 1: this one let us do. Come on, What made the 141 00:08:35,720 --> 00:08:42,040 Speaker 1: boyfriend thinks he could walk up on this man and say, hey, man, 142 00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 1: I don't appreciate you telling my married girlfriend to stop 143 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:52,240 Speaker 1: messing with me and focus on my marriage. How dare you? 144 00:08:53,679 --> 00:08:58,760 Speaker 1: They exchange words and your husband ended up clipping the 145 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 1: guy and he fell on the curb and got stretched up. 146 00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:05,840 Speaker 1: Now his real problem right here, this is why Tommy 147 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:08,840 Speaker 1: wants to make it just to push. He is shot 148 00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:13,800 Speaker 1: in comparison to my sixty three husband. So my husband tried. 149 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:16,080 Speaker 1: Tommy tried to defend a little man. Did you hear 150 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:19,840 Speaker 1: right there? He pushed it, knock, he slapped the sugar, 151 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:22,920 Speaker 1: he dripped. Tommy jumped in and tried to defend a 152 00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:25,320 Speaker 1: little shot ass man. But he shouldn't have ran his 153 00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:27,439 Speaker 1: little ass up on his big ass man. Now he's 154 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:32,880 Speaker 1: sixty three. He clipped knocked his ass down six three. 155 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:36,280 Speaker 1: So my husband tried not to hurt it. Now he 156 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:40,440 Speaker 1: got charges on it. I didn't flinch when my husband 157 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,840 Speaker 1: had to give a statement to the officer because he 158 00:09:43,920 --> 00:09:47,880 Speaker 1: got exactly what he deserved. So obviously you were there. 159 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:52,920 Speaker 1: She was in the car while her husband was pumping gas. 160 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:56,680 Speaker 1: That's how she knows the details. So now you watched 161 00:09:56,720 --> 00:09:58,960 Speaker 1: him and you didn't flinch because he got exactly what 162 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:02,120 Speaker 1: he does. Then I didn't flinch when my husband had 163 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 1: to give a statement to the officer because he got 164 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 1: exactly what he deserves. That means she was there and 165 00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:09,400 Speaker 1: saw the incident. Because the police came there and gave 166 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:12,400 Speaker 1: a statement. I looked like a food to my family 167 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:14,760 Speaker 1: since they found out that my husband got into a 168 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:17,640 Speaker 1: fight over another woman, and how they find that out 169 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:21,280 Speaker 1: because you told him. My husband argued that he was 170 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:24,400 Speaker 1: only trying to be a good friend. I told him 171 00:10:24,440 --> 00:10:26,480 Speaker 1: that either she goes or I'm going in. There's no 172 00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:28,520 Speaker 1: other way. He said, he shouldn't be punished for being 173 00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:30,679 Speaker 1: a good person. Was I wrong for giving him ultimate 174 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:34,840 Speaker 1: Absolutely not, Absolutely not. You're not wrong for giving him 175 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:38,280 Speaker 1: an ultimatorm. But you shouldn't allow this female friendship into 176 00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: your marriage because it's in your marriage. If your husband 177 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:43,839 Speaker 1: is sitting up on the phone with another woman at 178 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:46,840 Speaker 1: one o'clock in the morning, somebody's in your marriage. You 179 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 1: allowed this, You said it was okay. You should have 180 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:52,120 Speaker 1: been put your foot down. I hadn't told y'all this 181 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:56,240 Speaker 1: a hundred times about these female friends. Now she tricked 182 00:10:56,280 --> 00:10:59,000 Speaker 1: to begin with because she married and got a boyfriend, 183 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:07,640 Speaker 1: husband counseling this dysfunctional health. True, and he friends and 184 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:11,120 Speaker 1: won't hug and she won't him. What they're talking at 185 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,800 Speaker 1: one o'clock in the morn Oh they want each other? 186 00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:18,359 Speaker 1: Oh hell yeah, one o'clock in the morning. Are you crazy? 187 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:21,719 Speaker 1: And if she will see a husband and a man 188 00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:25,480 Speaker 1: on the side, why wouldn't she see nobody else, and yeah, 189 00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:28,600 Speaker 1: you should give him the ultimatum. And I can't believe 190 00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:32,160 Speaker 1: how stupid the husband is that he would jeopardize all 191 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:37,679 Speaker 1: he has right for her and she already got a 192 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 1: boyfriend and a husband. How can you risk what you 193 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:45,040 Speaker 1: have for someone that don't give a damn about what 194 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,960 Speaker 1: they have? So it doesn't make any sense. Everybody in 195 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:53,600 Speaker 1: the letter is stupid. The husband is dumb as a doughnut. 196 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,040 Speaker 1: Now I'm gonna get me a police rack and I'm 197 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,640 Speaker 1: gonna get some assault charges over this little shows dude 198 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:03,120 Speaker 1: that won't to sleep with my friend. I don't give 199 00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:06,720 Speaker 1: a damn who she's sleep with. I'm not gonna get 200 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,360 Speaker 1: no criminal record being court. Gotta get a lawyer in 201 00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:13,239 Speaker 1: all this. I'm facing the salt charger because the boyfriend 202 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:16,200 Speaker 1: you the boyfriend tries to jump on you. How you 203 00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:19,720 Speaker 1: the boyfriend You're gonna jump on this other man for telling? 204 00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:26,400 Speaker 1: And this on a letter full of stupid you sind 205 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:28,560 Speaker 1: A been trying to help somebody that's got a husband 206 00:12:28,559 --> 00:12:30,680 Speaker 1: and a boyfriend, and now I got you on the 207 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:34,160 Speaker 1: side causing troubling your marriage and now you got charged. 208 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:39,199 Speaker 1: You stupid? All right? Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter. 209 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:41,959 Speaker 1: It's Steve Barb the Little Man won't run upon nobody 210 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:45,560 Speaker 1: else now and face Man and Facebook comment said face Man, 211 00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:50,040 Speaker 1: And check out the Strawberry Letter podcast Hunting Man. We 212 00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:53,960 Speaker 1: have six minutes after the hours blah blah bluh Man. 213 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:58,680 Speaker 1: We'll have sports stuff with Junior right after that. You're 214 00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:01,200 Speaker 1: listening Harday Morning Show.