1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:13,040 Speaker 1: Nicky Glazer Podcast. Nicky, hey here, I am welcome to 2 00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:16,479 Speaker 1: the show. It's a Nick Glaser podcast. It's Monday. You 3 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:20,920 Speaker 1: know what that means. It's yeah, I guess who's here, Guys, 4 00:00:21,040 --> 00:00:23,560 Speaker 1: it's Andrew Colin. I decided to bring him in UM 5 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:27,800 Speaker 1: for the intro because well, we've just spent a lot 6 00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: of time together this morning already. I didn't wanna I 7 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:32,480 Speaker 1: didn't want to say goodbye. It took a long time 8 00:00:32,520 --> 00:00:34,599 Speaker 1: for us to get set up. We are live from 9 00:00:34,640 --> 00:00:37,720 Speaker 1: Los Angeles. UM. We are staying at a hotel. We 10 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:41,880 Speaker 1: across the hall from one another. UM. It was quite 11 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: a struggle to get this podcast up and running this morning. 12 00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 1: So many chords, so many hubs, so many uncharged computers, 13 00:00:49,159 --> 00:00:52,040 Speaker 1: and I mean it's a whole production. Thank you so 14 00:00:52,159 --> 00:00:55,720 Speaker 1: much to Noah and to Mark uh from my heart 15 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:58,560 Speaker 1: who helped aid in the process. And to the maid 16 00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:01,080 Speaker 1: who let me in my room after I sprinted out 17 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:03,400 Speaker 1: of my room to go help Andrew and then the 18 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:06,080 Speaker 1: door shut behind me. It would have been added another 19 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:08,759 Speaker 1: fifteen minutes to go down to the lobby and get 20 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,800 Speaker 1: my key. And this made she was like, I saw you, 21 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:13,480 Speaker 1: but she could you know, she could really get in 22 00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,800 Speaker 1: trouble for letting me back in my room without a 23 00:01:16,319 --> 00:01:18,480 Speaker 1: you know, a chick like checking. So I said, I 24 00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:20,360 Speaker 1: won't get you in trouble, and then I threw some 25 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 1: money at her. So shout out to everyone who helped. 26 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:26,600 Speaker 1: How are you this morning, Andrew? I'm good. I'm good. 27 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:29,600 Speaker 1: I'm staring at my curry from last night, which is 28 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:33,440 Speaker 1: holding up my curry container which you were so nice 29 00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 1: to get Thai food last night is holding is the 30 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:39,120 Speaker 1: background for my phone to keep it up? And uh, 31 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:43,160 Speaker 1: I got tripod. It was an interesting curry. You got 32 00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:47,280 Speaker 1: kind of a veg veggie VG. Yeah, well it was 33 00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:50,559 Speaker 1: veggie chicken. Did you notice that it was not real chicken? Yeah? 34 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:52,600 Speaker 1: It's good though, isn't that stuff good? Or no? You 35 00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:55,600 Speaker 1: don't like? I liked everything else in it, like I 36 00:01:55,640 --> 00:01:59,000 Speaker 1: love a veg. Just at that chicken just didn't do 37 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 1: it for me. Kind of looks like little scrotums and 38 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:05,040 Speaker 1: it's just not so it does regular chicken. But regular 39 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:11,280 Speaker 1: chicken looks so gross. But little scrow tums um. But 40 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:14,000 Speaker 1: just you still ate it though, right? Yeah, yeah, of 41 00:02:14,040 --> 00:02:17,040 Speaker 1: course I like it. It's the classic like eat the 42 00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:19,520 Speaker 1: salad without the cruetons and then eat the cruetons at 43 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,440 Speaker 1: the end of the salad like you probably ate around 44 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:28,600 Speaker 1: the chicken. Yeah, you know, I never go right in. 45 00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:32,680 Speaker 1: We were talking about scrotums this weekend, right, Oh how 46 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:36,600 Speaker 1: long a mine? Yes, preferences and you and the meal 47 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:39,920 Speaker 1: we're asking about like how we feel about um balls. 48 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,160 Speaker 1: Well it came up because my balls are the older 49 00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:47,600 Speaker 1: I get because of gravity. They just keep getting longer 50 00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:51,320 Speaker 1: and longer, and my dick doesn't get longer. So it's 51 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,760 Speaker 1: pretty funked up what God does to us, because well, 52 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:56,760 Speaker 1: your ball is way more than your dick. I know, 53 00:02:56,919 --> 00:02:58,640 Speaker 1: I need a weight, you know, and that's what's pulling 54 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:00,080 Speaker 1: it down. So if you put weights on your it, 55 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:02,720 Speaker 1: it would stretch it down. It wouldn't make your dick 56 00:03:02,760 --> 00:03:05,320 Speaker 1: actually longer. It would just be of you know, the 57 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 1: way ear lobes start to sag when you when women 58 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:13,400 Speaker 1: were like big jewelry, you know, like big earrings, heavy, 59 00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: like Leslie stall. Maybe I just need to get a 60 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,679 Speaker 1: dead guy screwed them to tie to my penis to 61 00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:23,120 Speaker 1: lengthen it. Yeah, just tie some screw them with balls 62 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:25,959 Speaker 1: to tie to the Only way to really stretch anything 63 00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:28,040 Speaker 1: down there is with a scrow them, and so you 64 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:31,120 Speaker 1: would have to well, we were we like looked up 65 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:33,520 Speaker 1: guys with like the biggest penis or the longest penis. 66 00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:37,119 Speaker 1: And this one guy, um, he was he would put 67 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,640 Speaker 1: weights on his to stretch it out because it became like, 68 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,520 Speaker 1: I bet it was already big. And then he was like, 69 00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:44,760 Speaker 1: let's just this is my thing, and then he is it. 70 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,640 Speaker 1: Do you ever like stretch it and pull on it 71 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:48,360 Speaker 1: so it can get longer? Did you ever do that 72 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,680 Speaker 1: when you were a kid? Yeah, And what guys do 73 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: is you get hard and you push on the skin 74 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:56,720 Speaker 1: around it to give it another like quarter belly button 75 00:03:56,760 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 1: almost like when you press around your belly button, it comes. Yeah, 76 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:02,600 Speaker 1: that's what you do with dicks. And and then what 77 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:05,920 Speaker 1: you learn when your kid is that there's a little 78 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 1: bit more dick inside you. That that's what the doctors 79 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:12,840 Speaker 1: do when they along your cock, they'll they'll they'll get 80 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,440 Speaker 1: there's a little bit more dick in your body. In 81 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:18,279 Speaker 1: your body, Oh, there's like you can feel that there's 82 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:21,880 Speaker 1: a little bit more like muscle in there. It's a muscle. 83 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:26,920 Speaker 1: I guess it's weird how it's how strong it gets. 84 00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:31,160 Speaker 1: It's just blood that's insane. It takes so much effort 85 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: for you guys to keep that thing hard. That's a 86 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:38,760 Speaker 1: that's a lot of energy going right towards that areas. 87 00:04:38,839 --> 00:04:42,560 Speaker 1: You guys can do anything else like us up, we can't. 88 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:47,120 Speaker 1: M M. I mean it is amazing remedial math. You 89 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:51,800 Speaker 1: wrote remedial math on a UM post this weekend, and 90 00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 1: I saw the comments and people are like, what is 91 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:55,560 Speaker 1: remedial math? And I didn't even know either, what is 92 00:04:55,640 --> 00:05:00,520 Speaker 1: remedial math? I think it's early math, okay, like you 93 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:04,160 Speaker 1: know plus and minus. Maybe. I think you're good at math. 94 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,600 Speaker 1: You're pretty fast. I'm pretty good at math. Give me 95 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 1: any times table, okay, um. I mean I feel like 96 00:05:12,040 --> 00:05:14,680 Speaker 1: everyone knows times tables. But do you want me to 97 00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:17,159 Speaker 1: give you like a higher number? Like just try me 98 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: out fourteen times twelve? Wow. I don't know if that's 99 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:27,760 Speaker 1: when you verify that. I just know the eight is 100 00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:29,440 Speaker 1: eight parts, right because I just did it in my 101 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: head like two times four. Wait said four times twelve. 102 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:38,560 Speaker 1: Yeah that's what I said. He said, whoa, Wow, No, 103 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 1: you tried to doubt me. You're like one sixty eight. 104 00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:45,760 Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, that's what I said. How did 105 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:47,520 Speaker 1: you do that, Like, what's what's going on in your 106 00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:51,000 Speaker 1: mind when you do that? Uh? So much? No, but 107 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,880 Speaker 1: I really want to know, you know when I when 108 00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,400 Speaker 1: I do, like, give me a simpler one. No, no, 109 00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:58,040 Speaker 1: this is what happened. It's got my mind. Did I 110 00:05:58,120 --> 00:05:59,919 Speaker 1: did twelve times twelve which I knew was a hundred 111 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:05,000 Speaker 1: already four added? There we go. Okay, that's that's you 112 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:09,920 Speaker 1: showed your work. Thank you. That's that's showing your work. 113 00:06:10,279 --> 00:06:16,160 Speaker 1: You didn't do it. I'll give you one. Okay. Um, 114 00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:20,800 Speaker 1: let's see nine times fifteen. Okay, so I'm gonna go 115 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,440 Speaker 1: a hundred and fifty. It is nine times fifteen times 116 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,200 Speaker 1: ten is hundred and fifties. So I'm gonna subtract nine 117 00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:30,000 Speaker 1: from that and it's gonna go one. No, hold on, 118 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:35,839 Speaker 1: I mean it's definitely that. There's like no doubt. Wait, 119 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 1: what nine times fifteen? You'rected nine instead of fifteen? Your 120 00:06:42,120 --> 00:06:48,640 Speaker 1: dumb shit? Oh I am, there's no way. It's not mad. 121 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:56,040 Speaker 1: I don't want to do it. Honestly, I don't even 122 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:58,800 Speaker 1: understand what you guys are doing with the subtractions. Okay, 123 00:06:58,839 --> 00:07:03,120 Speaker 1: So so if it's sorry to the people listening, um, 124 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:06,360 Speaker 1: if it's if it's nine times fifteen, fifteen times, you 125 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:09,159 Speaker 1: would go to which fifteen times ten, which is the 126 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,080 Speaker 1: closest thing to nine. And you know what ten times 127 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,000 Speaker 1: anything is is you just added zero, so it's gonna 128 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 1: be one, and then you subtract one of the things 129 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 1: that you multiplied, which I subtracted the wrong number nine. 130 00:07:20,360 --> 00:07:23,080 Speaker 1: And I should have known, because anything with a five 131 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,720 Speaker 1: in it is going to be a zero or five 132 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:28,840 Speaker 1: when you multiply it. So true. I never learned the 133 00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 1: one where it's like you hold up your hands and 134 00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:35,160 Speaker 1: you go like one, two three, and it's like seven, like, oh, 135 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:38,000 Speaker 1: it's nine times three, that's right, one to three, and 136 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 1: then it's two seven. Oh yeah, I never learned. You 137 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:45,320 Speaker 1: never learned that I drew the turkey that I definitely 138 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,360 Speaker 1: do left and right. I use this where you make 139 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:51,720 Speaker 1: l's with your hand, and the one that is long 140 00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:56,640 Speaker 1: is or the one that looks wait fuck, L is correct, 141 00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:59,640 Speaker 1: L is left, the one that's right is the left man, 142 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 1: and then right right sucks. You shouldn't that words should 143 00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 1: not be meaning correct And to turn to the make 144 00:08:10,520 --> 00:08:13,160 Speaker 1: a right right? How do you say make a right 145 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:19,480 Speaker 1: instead of saying right turn? Uh turn right correct no, 146 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:24,280 Speaker 1: what's half of ninety turn forty degrees to the east. 147 00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:29,800 Speaker 1: What do you how do you say? Right turn perpendicular? Oh, okay, 148 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:33,120 Speaker 1: we're really smart. I mean, Andrew, you're actually good at math. 149 00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:36,520 Speaker 1: I think I'm decent. I'm decent. I I did better 150 00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:43,840 Speaker 1: at math than verbal. In yeah, much better at verbal. 151 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:48,080 Speaker 1: I just went to the Starbucks that is by my 152 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,800 Speaker 1: So we're staying at a hotel in the valley in 153 00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:56,000 Speaker 1: um like the shallow Valley, the shally in l A. 154 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:58,439 Speaker 1: And I used to live right down the street from 155 00:08:58,440 --> 00:09:00,760 Speaker 1: where we're staying and and I used to go to 156 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:04,600 Speaker 1: the Starbucks every single day from like two thousand seven 157 00:09:04,640 --> 00:09:06,319 Speaker 1: to two thousand nine. And it was just like so 158 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:09,240 Speaker 1: trippy going back there, and like I was so just 159 00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,000 Speaker 1: I was in a worse place in my life. And 160 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: it was funny because we checked into the hotel yesterday 161 00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:18,360 Speaker 1: and I stayed at this hotel before. This is the 162 00:09:18,360 --> 00:09:20,560 Speaker 1: place I stayed where I spilled nail polish all over 163 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:24,880 Speaker 1: the bathroom, all over like a fucking crime scene. And 164 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,280 Speaker 1: I was crying because I was staying at this hotel 165 00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:31,840 Speaker 1: because I was being flown out to audition for you know, 166 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:35,520 Speaker 1: Kevin Smith, right, you know who that is. He This 167 00:09:35,600 --> 00:09:38,400 Speaker 1: was two thousand ten. How did you even get the audition? 168 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:42,000 Speaker 1: I don't. Some producer that I had worked with on 169 00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:48,280 Speaker 1: something liked me and he wanted me to audition to 170 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,480 Speaker 1: be one of the people that was going to be 171 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:55,000 Speaker 1: his co host for a daily show that would be syndicated, 172 00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:57,760 Speaker 1: kind of like a Regis and Kelly type thing, and 173 00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,440 Speaker 1: it would be Kevin Smith and a girl. And they 174 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,840 Speaker 1: were auditioning girl part for it, and I was in 175 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:04,720 Speaker 1: the running. It was me and two other girls, one 176 00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:08,680 Speaker 1: of them was Christina Positski, and we auditioned at John 177 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:12,640 Speaker 1: Lovetts Comedy Club and the Universal City Walk, which is 178 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:15,520 Speaker 1: at Universal Studios right right here in the valley and 179 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:17,720 Speaker 1: um and they flew me out from New York put 180 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 1: me up. I remember. It was so much money. I 181 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:22,320 Speaker 1: didn't even have a laptop at this time in my life. 182 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,160 Speaker 1: I was so broke. I was just starting my podcast 183 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:26,719 Speaker 1: with Sarah Schaeffer. I had just moved to New York. 184 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 1: I was living in a fucking hell hole in um 185 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:34,480 Speaker 1: Storia with a girl who didn't like me, and we 186 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:36,720 Speaker 1: never spoke. It was a kind of awkward thing where 187 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: you'd walk in every single night, and like you wouldn't 188 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:40,960 Speaker 1: even talk to each other, and you just kind of 189 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:44,200 Speaker 1: like passed like ghosts in the house. And oh, it 190 00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 1: was so miserable. And I had a house sent apede 191 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 1: that was crawling across my pillow one night, and I 192 00:10:48,920 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 1: couldn't sleep there for months anyway. So then I, um, 193 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:56,240 Speaker 1: I got flown out here to audition, and I fucking 194 00:10:57,360 --> 00:11:00,240 Speaker 1: I not only did I spill nail polish all over 195 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:03,199 Speaker 1: the bathroom in here, um, and I was crying and 196 00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:06,960 Speaker 1: trying to like wash it up with nail polished remover, 197 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,160 Speaker 1: and it was all over this white tile in the grout, 198 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,120 Speaker 1: like it could come off the tile okay, but like 199 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:13,920 Speaker 1: in the grout it was not coming out. And I 200 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:16,840 Speaker 1: was just like, I'm don't have thousands of dollars like 201 00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:20,679 Speaker 1: this is gonna be. No. I wasn't drunk. It was 202 00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,360 Speaker 1: the morning. I was just like always hungover though, you know, 203 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:25,800 Speaker 1: Like it was this guy was picking me up that 204 00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:27,679 Speaker 1: I used to sleep with back when I lived here 205 00:11:27,679 --> 00:11:29,480 Speaker 1: in two thousand seven, but now it's two thousand ten, 206 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:31,520 Speaker 1: and we like saw each other at a show and 207 00:11:31,559 --> 00:11:34,280 Speaker 1: he agreed to go to lunch the next day. I 208 00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:36,120 Speaker 1: could tell he didn't even want to. I remember he 209 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 1: was texting me being like I'm downstairs and I'm like, 210 00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: I just spilled nail polish. I'm so sorry, and I'm 211 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:43,480 Speaker 1: like I can tell he doesn't even like me. He's 212 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,880 Speaker 1: waiting to pick me up, he's angry, he's even doing 213 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:49,000 Speaker 1: this again. Um. And I went went down to the 214 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 1: lobby and I was like crying, and I went up 215 00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:52,839 Speaker 1: to the front desk and just like I just I 216 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:54,800 Speaker 1: spilled it all over it everywhere and they were like, 217 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,040 Speaker 1: it's fine, we got it. I was like, it's everywhere. 218 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,280 Speaker 1: They're like, we have we can clean up anything. It's 219 00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:03,520 Speaker 1: totally cool. And I didn't get charged anything. Was amazing. 220 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:07,400 Speaker 1: But I bombed that audition so fucking hard. Why do 221 00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:10,160 Speaker 1: you think the audition and like, what was the audition? 222 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:12,680 Speaker 1: What did you sit with him? It was, Yeah, it 223 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,720 Speaker 1: was in front of a live audience, and it was 224 00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:17,920 Speaker 1: Kevin Smith's show where he just stands up, sits on 225 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:21,280 Speaker 1: stage and like tell his stories and then he would 226 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:23,959 Speaker 1: have he would ask each of the girls to get 227 00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,080 Speaker 1: up and have a conversation with him in front of 228 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,599 Speaker 1: an audience, so just like kind of do a podcast, 229 00:12:28,720 --> 00:12:32,440 Speaker 1: kind of in front of an audience and I lost. 230 00:12:32,559 --> 00:12:35,120 Speaker 1: Oh no, that was part of the audition, And then 231 00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:38,360 Speaker 1: the second part was actually to do his podcast, and 232 00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:42,560 Speaker 1: I went to his house to do his podcast. And 233 00:12:42,840 --> 00:12:45,720 Speaker 1: I had stayed up all night the night before drinking 234 00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:48,839 Speaker 1: so much with my with the guy that I liked 235 00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:51,960 Speaker 1: so much mc Mr Napkins, who was about to be 236 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 1: my boyfriend from that night I think was the first 237 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 1: time we hooked up, and I woke I shouldn't. I 238 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: had a show earlier that night. I was supposed to 239 00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:00,640 Speaker 1: go back to my hotel hell and just get a 240 00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,480 Speaker 1: good night's sleep for this early morning I had to 241 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 1: make up at like seven am to do this podcast. 242 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,480 Speaker 1: That was like and I already signed all the contracts 243 00:13:07,559 --> 00:13:09,240 Speaker 1: for like what the money would be if I got 244 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 1: this job, and it was so much money, Like it 245 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:16,560 Speaker 1: was justin ever dream of a couple of questions, did 246 00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:19,480 Speaker 1: you did you not care because you did so bad 247 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:21,840 Speaker 1: on the live show that you figured the live show 248 00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:24,440 Speaker 1: went kind of well? And then I did the show 249 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:28,520 Speaker 1: at u c B on Franklin, That's where I saw Zach. Afterwards, 250 00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:30,760 Speaker 1: we went to Birds, which is the bar next door, 251 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:32,800 Speaker 1: and I just had one beer which led to two, 252 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:35,160 Speaker 1: which and then all of a sudden, this guy that 253 00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:37,640 Speaker 1: I liked things were going well with this guy that 254 00:13:37,880 --> 00:13:40,200 Speaker 1: he's finally single. He was he was had a girlfriend 255 00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:42,240 Speaker 1: when I first met him. I come back to town 256 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:45,720 Speaker 1: and now he's single, and yeah, I just got wasted. 257 00:13:45,760 --> 00:13:50,640 Speaker 1: I was so excited about I've always prioritized like boys 258 00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:56,080 Speaker 1: over work always. Thank god, I haven't had that much 259 00:13:56,360 --> 00:14:00,520 Speaker 1: like uh excitement and that department, like it's been pretty stable. 260 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:03,560 Speaker 1: But I've always just been like, oh, this guy that 261 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:07,079 Speaker 1: I've liked, like this is happening. Okay, I'll just put this. 262 00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:09,320 Speaker 1: This is more important than everything else, you know. It's 263 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: just like I and and I showed up the next 264 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,440 Speaker 1: morning and I lost my voice. I was literally on 265 00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:18,079 Speaker 1: the podcast, like, no, I lost my voice because I 266 00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:19,960 Speaker 1: used to lose my voice every time I drank, because 267 00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:22,720 Speaker 1: I would just be screaming. It would be so dry. 268 00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:24,800 Speaker 1: It was just so what did you do? Did you 269 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:27,080 Speaker 1: try to play it off or did you apologize? Or 270 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,720 Speaker 1: like I said it, you know, like I'm sick or something. 271 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:31,960 Speaker 1: You know, like you just lie when you were hung over. 272 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,480 Speaker 1: You are sick, So I guess that's not a lie. 273 00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,720 Speaker 1: But you know that's the part I hated about drinking 274 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:40,560 Speaker 1: so much is that you're sick, but no one feels 275 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:42,680 Speaker 1: sorry for you. You've done it to yourself. You can't 276 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: get that sick. I'm I've got a cold sympathy where 277 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,920 Speaker 1: I got the flu sympathy. Like, no, when you were hungover, 278 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:52,680 Speaker 1: people are just like, oh fuck you. You know it's 279 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:55,040 Speaker 1: and it's just you on your own. And I I 280 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:58,200 Speaker 1: really crave a lot of nurturing when I'm sick. And 281 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:00,480 Speaker 1: I think that that was That was kind of the 282 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:04,400 Speaker 1: And by the way, I celebrated my tenure um of 283 00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:09,880 Speaker 1: not drinking anniversary on Saturday, I believe, Yes, I think 284 00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:14,320 Speaker 1: it was Friday night, wasn't it? It was Friday, um, 285 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,000 Speaker 1: because I went to the Taylor Swifst sing along and 286 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,920 Speaker 1: that was on Friday. Our days are almost identical. It's 287 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 1: kind of weird, really what days yours? I mean, it's right, 288 00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:24,200 Speaker 1: like literally, I don't know the exact day. I could 289 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,440 Speaker 1: look it up. It was the day after I did 290 00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:30,000 Speaker 1: a Girl's Gotta Eat live show in New York and 291 00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:32,280 Speaker 1: that was the last time I had a drink, so 292 00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:37,680 Speaker 1: three years from me. But yeah, dude, that's awesome. Yeah, 293 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:40,720 Speaker 1: it's uh, you know, a few times it by fifteen 294 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: and then you subtract fifteen, it's it's like one actually, 295 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 1: um yeah, And I didn't reluctant to ever say after 296 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:59,760 Speaker 1: you bomb this, this things to this opportunity, you know, 297 00:15:59,840 --> 00:16:01,800 Speaker 1: like this happens to me all the time. Though, Like 298 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:04,840 Speaker 1: I want to be clear, like my life has not 299 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:12,360 Speaker 1: changed in terms of shirking responsibility in favor of doing 300 00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:15,880 Speaker 1: something that is fleeting and feels good in the moment, 301 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:21,880 Speaker 1: whether that was getting high, drinking, hooking up something that 302 00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:24,280 Speaker 1: like gives me a rush, and something that I'm like 303 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:28,640 Speaker 1: honestly so scared about, so nervous about. Um, you know, 304 00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:32,040 Speaker 1: I have I have to edit my special. I must edit. 305 00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,320 Speaker 1: I'm going in from getting picked up in one hour 306 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:38,120 Speaker 1: to go into an edit bay and look at my 307 00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:41,680 Speaker 1: special that I take two weeks ago. And I am 308 00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:47,160 Speaker 1: filled with dread and anxiety over it because it's not 309 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,000 Speaker 1: going to live up to what I want for myself. 310 00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:53,960 Speaker 1: It just can't because I don't. There's no living up 311 00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:57,840 Speaker 1: to what I there's there's just no there's I can't 312 00:16:57,840 --> 00:17:01,560 Speaker 1: be perfect. And I woke up this morning to look 313 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:04,160 Speaker 1: at it, just to like see it. And I watched 314 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:07,640 Speaker 1: a little bit of it with you yesterday at the airport, 315 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 1: and I felt really good because it was funny, and 316 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:13,119 Speaker 1: then I watched I woke up this morning and I 317 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,399 Speaker 1: was doing the thing that I read in UM, that 318 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,800 Speaker 1: book that are recommended that I only read literally one 319 00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:19,160 Speaker 1: chapter of, and then I was like, oh my god, 320 00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:21,199 Speaker 1: and it helped me edit my last special because it 321 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:23,440 Speaker 1: was that was the thing I put off more than anything. 322 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 1: I also have a book proposal do like on Wednesday, 323 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:28,879 Speaker 1: for my book that I'm supposed to be selling in 324 00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:31,280 Speaker 1: the new year. And I can't do eat any of 325 00:17:31,320 --> 00:17:35,119 Speaker 1: these things. I keep playing guitar, I keep um just 326 00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:39,200 Speaker 1: texting friends, uh like listening to music, like I just 327 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:42,920 Speaker 1: find a masturbating. I find anything else to do besides 328 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,840 Speaker 1: these things. But what I did this morning because it 329 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:48,160 Speaker 1: literally is the last second, like I have to look 330 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:50,000 Speaker 1: at it today. And I was supposed to send notes 331 00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:52,000 Speaker 1: before I went to the edit, so I was gonna 332 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,760 Speaker 1: work on notes this morning. Set my alarm for six. 333 00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 1: Had to be somewhere at eight, so I was like, 334 00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:59,880 Speaker 1: I'll two hours to watch this seventy five minute cut. 335 00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 1: I got ten minutes in and I go, funk this. 336 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,240 Speaker 1: I cannot do this. I want to just sit with 337 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,280 Speaker 1: someone in an edit bay and go, no, can we 338 00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:10,399 Speaker 1: see the other guys? But like, I just think that 339 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:13,040 Speaker 1: I work better in the moment when it's the last 340 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,560 Speaker 1: minute and it's not the last minute yet. Um. But 341 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,879 Speaker 1: I did use the tools that Ari Finling had suggested. 342 00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:22,879 Speaker 1: I read this book called The Tools, and it is 343 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:27,919 Speaker 1: about um it is about the Brendan shob podcast. Now 344 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:31,520 Speaker 1: it is about I was just making people. Does he 345 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:37,840 Speaker 1: have a podcast? I think which one. He's always so 346 00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:39,479 Speaker 1: nice to me. I don't know why I picked him 347 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:42,880 Speaker 1: as a tool. He's really always he He never says 348 00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:44,720 Speaker 1: I'm like I think they say I'm funny, but he 349 00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:46,600 Speaker 1: always says I'm hot, and it makes me feel good. 350 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 1: Whenever my name comes up in a podcast, I'll just 351 00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:51,040 Speaker 1: be like, she's so hot, and like, I don't know 352 00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:53,560 Speaker 1: why it makes me feel fucking great. I mean, I 353 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:58,000 Speaker 1: do know why I'm shallow, but um, so the tools 354 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,560 Speaker 1: say you're supposed to when you were scared of something. 355 00:19:01,119 --> 00:19:02,760 Speaker 1: And I just want to share this with everyone because 356 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:04,280 Speaker 1: this really did help me this morning. Even though I 357 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:07,479 Speaker 1: didn't get through it per se, it did help me. 358 00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:09,119 Speaker 1: Just look at it and we got to go to 359 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:14,439 Speaker 1: break and what it is is you say, I love fear. 360 00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:19,480 Speaker 1: Fear sets me free. Bring it on. I love fear, 361 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,040 Speaker 1: fear sets me free. Bring it on. And I elaborate 362 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:23,879 Speaker 1: a little bit more when we come back from this 363 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:33,199 Speaker 1: quick bread and Andrew. Now I just leave, Andrew, do 364 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,120 Speaker 1: you remember this tool? This this I love fear, fear 365 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:39,920 Speaker 1: sets me free, Bring it on? Remember that Mons Because 366 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,520 Speaker 1: this book that Ari told us to read, we both 367 00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:45,879 Speaker 1: read the same chapter. Um. I can't imagine if we 368 00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:47,920 Speaker 1: read two chapters in a book. I mean we'd probably 369 00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:52,879 Speaker 1: know division long division, No, I think. Um, what I 370 00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:55,399 Speaker 1: remember is is you speak out your fear. So whatever 371 00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 1: you you're most afraid of, Let's say your special sucks. 372 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,800 Speaker 1: Everyone hates it? Yes, and then like what's the words 373 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:04,800 Speaker 1: that can happen from that? And then you speak it 374 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:08,360 Speaker 1: out to existence and so then you kind of mitigate 375 00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:11,480 Speaker 1: it by saying it closer, you get to fear. See. 376 00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,880 Speaker 1: This is what I reread this chapter because I needed 377 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:16,200 Speaker 1: just to brush up on it. So if this thing 378 00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:18,520 Speaker 1: you're dreading, or this thing a call you're about to 379 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:20,000 Speaker 1: make to your sister who you haven't talked to in 380 00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,720 Speaker 1: a while, or you're about to clean out this garage 381 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:26,200 Speaker 1: that has just been piling up this thing. The further 382 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:30,199 Speaker 1: away you push it, the more scary it is. So 383 00:20:30,440 --> 00:20:33,600 Speaker 1: imagine something, you know, the closer you get to it, 384 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:36,280 Speaker 1: the smaller it shrinks down in terms of taking over 385 00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:39,160 Speaker 1: your mental space and and being something that you are 386 00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,879 Speaker 1: scared to confront. Like once, it's almost like a monster 387 00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:44,159 Speaker 1: that in the distance looks super scary, but when you 388 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:46,080 Speaker 1: get up close, it's the size of a chipmunk. So 389 00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:50,080 Speaker 1: the closer you get to thing, it diminishes. And that's 390 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,480 Speaker 1: just true when you actually learn to confront these things. 391 00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:56,679 Speaker 1: So what you do is you actually visualize, You visualize 392 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:59,320 Speaker 1: the thing that you're fearing doing. For me, it was 393 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,920 Speaker 1: editing my ushel and I was just like you know what, 394 00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:05,719 Speaker 1: you try to convince yourself that you love fear because 395 00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,199 Speaker 1: on the and not in a masochistic way of like 396 00:21:08,320 --> 00:21:11,920 Speaker 1: I love pain, I love like the I love actually 397 00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:16,840 Speaker 1: being scared and nervous, but I love the motion of 398 00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:20,960 Speaker 1: fear tells me that I am about to conquer something 399 00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:23,320 Speaker 1: if I get closer to it. I love fear because 400 00:21:23,359 --> 00:21:26,359 Speaker 1: fear is actually this illusion. It's it tells you to 401 00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:28,320 Speaker 1: stay away and it makes you think that you should 402 00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,960 Speaker 1: be scared. But the sense of fear is actually you 403 00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:34,280 Speaker 1: about to overcome something that is going to make you 404 00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:36,040 Speaker 1: feel so good on the other side of it because 405 00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:39,840 Speaker 1: it will be over, it will have an ending to 406 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,760 Speaker 1: it once it's done, and it's something that you know 407 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:45,520 Speaker 1: you gotta do. So what you do is you say, 408 00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:48,119 Speaker 1: I love fear. You just keep saying this over to yourself. 409 00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:51,400 Speaker 1: I love fear. Fear sets me free, bring it on, 410 00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:54,680 Speaker 1: and you imagine yourself just walking into this like cloud 411 00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:57,280 Speaker 1: of the fear and just facing it down on and 412 00:21:57,280 --> 00:22:00,320 Speaker 1: really convince yourself, even if you don't that you of it, 413 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:02,239 Speaker 1: that you love fear because you know on the other 414 00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:03,960 Speaker 1: side of it that it's going to be great. So 415 00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:07,120 Speaker 1: when you start to change your relationship to fear, instead 416 00:22:07,119 --> 00:22:10,919 Speaker 1: of being scared of fear, just re restructuring how you 417 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:12,679 Speaker 1: feel about it and be like, I actually love it. 418 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,320 Speaker 1: And if you say things enough, I'm not even kidding you. 419 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:19,040 Speaker 1: I never thought positive affirmations worked or like these mantras, 420 00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:24,280 Speaker 1: but dude, they work. I was just reading about Lucid Dreaming, 421 00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:27,399 Speaker 1: which I'm getting into because I started following the subreddit 422 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:31,240 Speaker 1: about Lucid Dreaming just too as I'm you know, about 423 00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:33,080 Speaker 1: to fall asleep at night pick up little tips. It's 424 00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:37,840 Speaker 1: a very convoluted concept and there's a lot of things 425 00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:40,000 Speaker 1: about it that I don't really quite understand. And you've 426 00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 1: got to keep a dream journal, and you've got to 427 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 1: do reality checks during your day so that you start 428 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,320 Speaker 1: doing reality checks in your dream. So during the day, 429 00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:49,199 Speaker 1: every hour, you're supposed to set an alarm on your 430 00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:51,480 Speaker 1: phone to do a reality check. If you see an inception, 431 00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:53,800 Speaker 1: it's the one where you put your finger through your hand, 432 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,040 Speaker 1: and when you do this in a dream, your finger 433 00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,719 Speaker 1: will go through your hand, but in reality, so if 434 00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:01,960 Speaker 1: you do this all day. And I was just reading 435 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:04,320 Speaker 1: last night that this guy was like, for everyone who's 436 00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:06,240 Speaker 1: feeling frustrated that you're trying to lose his dream and 437 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:09,400 Speaker 1: you're doing these reality checks twenty twenty times a day, 438 00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:12,720 Speaker 1: maybe more, and you think it's not paying off. I'm 439 00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:14,640 Speaker 1: not doing them in my dream. He was like, last night, 440 00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,560 Speaker 1: it finally, after fucking months of doing reality checks, it 441 00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:21,280 Speaker 1: finally happened. Where I was, you know, he was like 442 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:26,359 Speaker 1: making pancakes with fucking you know aunt man and over 443 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,199 Speaker 1: a grill, and he just was like, I'm gonna do 444 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:31,040 Speaker 1: a reality check, and he did it and then he 445 00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:32,159 Speaker 1: was like and then all of a sudden he was 446 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:33,919 Speaker 1: able to be like, oh my god, I'm dreaming. I 447 00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:35,359 Speaker 1: can do anything I want in this dream, and then 448 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,479 Speaker 1: he can move about it. So it's these things that 449 00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:40,119 Speaker 1: you just it's trusting I guess that you don't have 450 00:23:40,160 --> 00:23:43,240 Speaker 1: it all figured out, and that even though because positive 451 00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,960 Speaker 1: affirmation seemed like the biggest bunch of hogwash to me, 452 00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:49,720 Speaker 1: of saying something over and over and then it actually happening, 453 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:52,800 Speaker 1: I would love, besties, if you have any experience with 454 00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,680 Speaker 1: that of like saying something over and over and then 455 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,720 Speaker 1: it really changing the way you look at something or 456 00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,679 Speaker 1: the way that you live your life. I would love 457 00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:02,240 Speaker 1: to hear stories of that, because my most I mean, 458 00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:06,359 Speaker 1: I have a couple of faces the things that change me. 459 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:09,880 Speaker 1: The most simplest thing that has changed my life probably 460 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:14,439 Speaker 1: the most, was like two sentences and it's instead of 461 00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:16,960 Speaker 1: saying I have to do something, you change it to 462 00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:21,280 Speaker 1: I guess to do something, and it just I mean 463 00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:23,520 Speaker 1: I remember, like, you know, you come up in New 464 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 1: York and you do stand up and you you got 465 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:28,120 Speaker 1: to do a show in like the Lower East Side 466 00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:30,879 Speaker 1: in a bar for five people that aren't listening and 467 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:33,600 Speaker 1: the TV might still be on, and you gotta be like, 468 00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:36,280 Speaker 1: I have to fucking do this. I have and you go, oh, 469 00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:38,840 Speaker 1: I get to perform, I get to practice, I get 470 00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:41,400 Speaker 1: to do this, and it just changes how you It's 471 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:45,920 Speaker 1: such a simple phrase that really changed how I look 472 00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:49,359 Speaker 1: at so much shit, especially stand up like and I 473 00:24:49,359 --> 00:24:51,680 Speaker 1: don't know, it really helped me a lot. So it's like, 474 00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:54,639 Speaker 1: if you like, you know you're a lot, you're dreading 475 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:56,840 Speaker 1: something or you're nervous about something, you just change it 476 00:24:56,880 --> 00:25:00,480 Speaker 1: to It's like calling the insurance come any how do 477 00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:02,200 Speaker 1: you how do you frame that? Like I have to 478 00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:04,520 Speaker 1: call my insurance company. I get to like, I have 479 00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:08,040 Speaker 1: money to afford assurance. That's cool, yes, yeah yeah? Or 480 00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:10,840 Speaker 1: how about this, You're just fucking alive to be able 481 00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:13,359 Speaker 1: to make the phone call and you're healthy, so you 482 00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 1: get it. The other day, when I did my Instagram 483 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:20,080 Speaker 1: live and I was playing music, I was just so 484 00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,360 Speaker 1: grateful in that moment because I had all these besties 485 00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:25,480 Speaker 1: watching and being so supportive. Noah was there, and I 486 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:27,800 Speaker 1: was just like, I was honest, I do it. I 487 00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:30,320 Speaker 1: was like, I'm so grateful for my hands. I'm so 488 00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,480 Speaker 1: like if you have hands. Maybe out there you don't 489 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:35,560 Speaker 1: have hands, or you have arthritists, even if you have 490 00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:38,320 Speaker 1: authritis in your hands, like you still have hands, Like 491 00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:43,479 Speaker 1: it's it's so simple. Gratitude lists are those kinds of 492 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:45,680 Speaker 1: things that really help you. Noah, is there anything that's 493 00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:48,280 Speaker 1: coming to mind for you that is something that you 494 00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:50,760 Speaker 1: thought wouldn't have worked in terms of this kind of 495 00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:54,760 Speaker 1: fu fu uh? Positive affirmation changing the way you look 496 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,520 Speaker 1: at things kind of thing. I used to be the 497 00:25:56,560 --> 00:26:00,200 Speaker 1: biggest pessimist and I was like, oh, this is such BS. 498 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:03,159 Speaker 1: But I just think it's um like the laws that 499 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,960 Speaker 1: you changed it to the best Ship BS stands for 500 00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:11,280 Speaker 1: best ship exactly, And I just found, like through experience 501 00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:16,800 Speaker 1: that positive energy attracts more positive energy. I've also learned 502 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:20,879 Speaker 1: to eliminate should the words should. Like for me, I 503 00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:23,120 Speaker 1: just keep saying should is a dirty word? How can 504 00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:25,640 Speaker 1: I make this phrase or statement without using the word? 505 00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:30,840 Speaker 1: Shop good word? Should is the one thing I like 506 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,480 Speaker 1: a but should. Let me just say is that I 507 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:35,560 Speaker 1: never forgot this and I think I've shared it before. 508 00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:39,359 Speaker 1: When your shoulders are like, oh oh my god, Like 509 00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:41,880 Speaker 1: when when you have like a tension in your shoulders 510 00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:45,080 Speaker 1: that's all the should's there, shoulters, because they're all the 511 00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:47,040 Speaker 1: shoulds of like I should be doing this, and I 512 00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:48,880 Speaker 1: should do that, and I need to do that, like 513 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:51,840 Speaker 1: when you're when you feel a pain in your shoulder, 514 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:56,120 Speaker 1: that's your that's that's a sign to go to drop 515 00:26:56,160 --> 00:27:01,200 Speaker 1: the shouts, because honestly, it's enough that you're a live there. 516 00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:03,919 Speaker 1: You know, I should be doing pilates, I should be 517 00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:08,080 Speaker 1: my lawn should look like that woman's my hair should 518 00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:11,560 Speaker 1: I should get my hair done? Like if you I 519 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:14,320 Speaker 1: need to say this to myself. You're doing your fucking best, Nikki. 520 00:27:14,640 --> 00:27:17,560 Speaker 1: You're doing your best. And yesterday you had all day, 521 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:20,240 Speaker 1: you had twelve hours of travel, Andrew and I had 522 00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:25,720 Speaker 1: yesterday And was my plan to tackle my special You 523 00:27:25,840 --> 00:27:28,960 Speaker 1: damn right it was? Was it too, you know, work 524 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:31,679 Speaker 1: on my book proposal? Yes? Did I tell people that 525 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:33,880 Speaker 1: those were things I was gonna do? Yes? Was there 526 00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:36,360 Speaker 1: ever a second I wanted to do them? No? Did 527 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,439 Speaker 1: I think about it constantly that I wasn't doing it? 528 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:40,720 Speaker 1: And did I kind of suffer all day? Yes? But 529 00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:43,119 Speaker 1: you know what, there was no other way for yesterday 530 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,960 Speaker 1: to happen. There was no fucking other way I was 531 00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:48,119 Speaker 1: never going to do that yesterday. It was not in 532 00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:50,600 Speaker 1: the plan. And the thing is, it's not that I 533 00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:53,800 Speaker 1: could have done those things because I literally couldn't. Yes, 534 00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:56,199 Speaker 1: I had my laptop, Yes, I had WiFi, Yes I 535 00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,840 Speaker 1: had the time, Yes, But could I do do it? No? 536 00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:03,320 Speaker 1: Because I wanted to listen to fucking say Goodbye Dave Matthews, 537 00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:07,040 Speaker 1: Tim Reynolds Life at Luther College a hundred times over 538 00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:10,600 Speaker 1: and over so that I could, you know, mentally figure 539 00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:13,960 Speaker 1: out the strumming and strum like quietly in my seat 540 00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:17,400 Speaker 1: like a lunatic on my flight. That's what I wanted 541 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:20,040 Speaker 1: to do. That's all I could do. A couple of questions, 542 00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:22,919 Speaker 1: one for Noah, when you instead of should, when you 543 00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:25,199 Speaker 1: eliminate it, do you just do the thing that you 544 00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:27,480 Speaker 1: think that you should have done? Like do you just 545 00:28:28,359 --> 00:28:30,680 Speaker 1: is what it should that you're in your head this way? 546 00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,639 Speaker 1: Like what's the example of, Like what do you do 547 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:35,160 Speaker 1: when you go, oh, I should have gone to jiu jitsu? 548 00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:37,439 Speaker 1: Do you just go like is that? Like what do 549 00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:39,440 Speaker 1: you think of it? Like a dirty word? Like don't 550 00:28:39,520 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 1: say that? Yeah, I just say okay, Well, how do 551 00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:46,960 Speaker 1: I feel today about going to jiu jitsu? And then 552 00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:51,040 Speaker 1: I weigh out the pros and cons of going Okay, yeah, 553 00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:54,360 Speaker 1: so I just don't like just having that mind frame 554 00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:57,680 Speaker 1: of I should do that or they should do this 555 00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:00,880 Speaker 1: or that. It's just I think it kind of um 556 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,320 Speaker 1: gives me like a sort of arrogance that I don't 557 00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:06,040 Speaker 1: want to have, Like I know what's best for everyone 558 00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:10,240 Speaker 1: or best for you. Thank you for hitting on that, 559 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:14,280 Speaker 1: like I feel like so often, And I know I'm 560 00:29:14,280 --> 00:29:16,640 Speaker 1: not alone here. I have it all figured out. I 561 00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:19,960 Speaker 1: know what would make me the best I could be. 562 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:22,480 Speaker 1: I know I know the right workouts, I know the 563 00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:25,959 Speaker 1: right diet, I know the right like the right clothes 564 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:30,280 Speaker 1: to where. I know all of that. But actually I 565 00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:34,479 Speaker 1: think that the choices I make might be what is 566 00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:37,360 Speaker 1: the I actually I have to surrender and go I 567 00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:41,160 Speaker 1: don't know. I I am not you know, I believe 568 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:44,640 Speaker 1: in like I say, God, but for me that is 569 00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:47,600 Speaker 1: really the universe. And that even sounds worse to some 570 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:49,600 Speaker 1: people in a lot of ways, like the universe wanted 571 00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,640 Speaker 1: me to have this. But I truly like I'm having 572 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:55,880 Speaker 1: a dilemma in my life right now, and I keep 573 00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:58,920 Speaker 1: going like I have to make a decision about this, 574 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:01,880 Speaker 1: this needs to be decided it I need to look 575 00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,040 Speaker 1: into the future because I know what's going to happen 576 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:05,440 Speaker 1: with this if I choose this lane, and I know 577 00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:08,239 Speaker 1: what's gonna happen if I choose this lane. And you know, 578 00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:11,320 Speaker 1: everyone has this in their life, whether it's small or big. 579 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,280 Speaker 1: These different lanes you can take. And yesterday I was 580 00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:16,800 Speaker 1: just I had a friend remind me and I was 581 00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:22,360 Speaker 1: reading through, um this this amazing app that I really 582 00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:25,040 Speaker 1: recommend you buying. It's probably four ninety nine, but it's 583 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:28,880 Speaker 1: an alan On type literature thing, which is alan On 584 00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:31,200 Speaker 1: is if you are an adult child of an alcoholic 585 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:34,040 Speaker 1: or you have any alcoholic family members. There's this group 586 00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,720 Speaker 1: you can go to called alan On, and there's but this. 587 00:30:36,880 --> 00:30:38,520 Speaker 1: You don't need to qualify for this. These are just 588 00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:40,800 Speaker 1: good daily it's a daily reader and you it's an 589 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:42,480 Speaker 1: app and you just open it up in whatever day 590 00:30:42,480 --> 00:30:45,959 Speaker 1: it's on. You have a lesson in there. And the 591 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:48,400 Speaker 1: other day it was like I just I looked for 592 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:50,400 Speaker 1: the one that I needed because what I needed to 593 00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:54,120 Speaker 1: hear was you don't have it all figured out. You 594 00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:56,760 Speaker 1: don't even know what's best for you. You really need 595 00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,280 Speaker 1: to trust that it is not up to you. You 596 00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:02,520 Speaker 1: didn't choose your brain. You didn't choose how your heart is. 597 00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:04,560 Speaker 1: You didn't choose the color of your skin. You didn't 598 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:09,360 Speaker 1: choose your parents. Someone did. Maybe it's fucking just nature. 599 00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,280 Speaker 1: Maybe it was, you know, just randomness, even if you 600 00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 1: don't believe in God and your total atheists and it's 601 00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,280 Speaker 1: just random, you know, like I was just a fucking 602 00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,360 Speaker 1: sperm that hit an egg and then all genetics happened. 603 00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:23,239 Speaker 1: That still wasn't up to you, And it's still not 604 00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:25,960 Speaker 1: up to you. None of it is. Your brain is 605 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:28,720 Speaker 1: making thoughts that you think you're in control of, but 606 00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:32,640 Speaker 1: you really don't, because your brain was not developed by you. 607 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:36,520 Speaker 1: It's the thoughts you have were not chosen by you. Um, 608 00:31:36,560 --> 00:31:38,640 Speaker 1: and that gets into no free will. But like I 609 00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:41,480 Speaker 1: just have to go. I said yesterday about this decision 610 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:43,520 Speaker 1: that I felt was so fraught that I need to make. 611 00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:45,800 Speaker 1: And even if you have a decision that has a deadline, 612 00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:47,800 Speaker 1: let's say this one doesn't for me. It's just like 613 00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:51,280 Speaker 1: a life thing, but one that is like a decision 614 00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,840 Speaker 1: needs to be made tomorrow. Let's say you need to 615 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,400 Speaker 1: decide if you're gonna take this job offer or you know, 616 00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:02,520 Speaker 1: quit your job truly, just try it. I know it 617 00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:05,200 Speaker 1: sounds insane. The worst that can happen is nothing happens. 618 00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:08,720 Speaker 1: But just go Universe or God or whatever you believe in, 619 00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:14,280 Speaker 1: fucking random uh spaghetti monster in this guy, help me 620 00:32:14,880 --> 00:32:17,360 Speaker 1: guide me to what I need to do. Let me 621 00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:20,160 Speaker 1: just like relax and go on this ride, and you 622 00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:22,840 Speaker 1: tell me what I need to do, and somehow somewhere 623 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:25,720 Speaker 1: you will know what's right to do, because whatever you 624 00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:28,680 Speaker 1: do is the right way. Whatever you choose, even if 625 00:32:28,680 --> 00:32:30,800 Speaker 1: it's the biggest regret you've ever made, it was always 626 00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:32,440 Speaker 1: going to go that way. So just let it happen. 627 00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:35,880 Speaker 1: It just it, just I just I That was a 628 00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:40,160 Speaker 1: tool that I got from my eating disorder recovery that 629 00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:41,760 Speaker 1: has helped me in so many things in life that 630 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:44,240 Speaker 1: I have to remember it is I keep thinking I'm 631 00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:47,440 Speaker 1: in control of everything, what I wear, what I eat, 632 00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,480 Speaker 1: and sometimes even what I wear. I go, this is 633 00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:52,479 Speaker 1: a thing in recovery. A lot when you're looking at socks, 634 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,480 Speaker 1: you go, God, what socks should I wear today? And 635 00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:58,680 Speaker 1: somehow something pops into your head of like these are 636 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:02,200 Speaker 1: the ones, and you just know it's weird. If you 637 00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:05,800 Speaker 1: just surrender, like you have control the answer will present 638 00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:10,280 Speaker 1: itself a lot of times. I think also, like, you know, 639 00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:14,719 Speaker 1: did twelve hours? You know you go. It's funny when 640 00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:17,000 Speaker 1: you say, like I had twelve hours yesterday to do 641 00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:21,560 Speaker 1: to special You know, yeah I did. But if you 642 00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:25,360 Speaker 1: really like think about it. One, it was the night 643 00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:29,080 Speaker 1: before we finished, you know, thirty eight cities of doing 644 00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:33,880 Speaker 1: a tour, right, you did three hours of stand up 645 00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:39,320 Speaker 1: this past weekend. We traveled over ten hours over two 646 00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:42,800 Speaker 1: different states before all this twelve hours. Right then, you're 647 00:33:42,800 --> 00:33:44,920 Speaker 1: trying to do a hotel that smelled like cigarette smoke. 648 00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:46,800 Speaker 1: I had to check, I had to repack and pack 649 00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,960 Speaker 1: and leave it. I was crying before a show because 650 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:55,200 Speaker 1: I was so depressed this weekend. Twelve hours, it doesn't matter. 651 00:33:55,240 --> 00:33:57,640 Speaker 1: And seeing about me that when the alarm goes off 652 00:33:57,640 --> 00:33:59,400 Speaker 1: in the morning, it's a new day. It doesn't matter 653 00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:01,720 Speaker 1: what you did this a can. You gotta work today 654 00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:03,959 Speaker 1: and I gotta let myself off the fucking hook for it. 655 00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:07,200 Speaker 1: And you're right. So that's what I'm saying, Like all 656 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:13,279 Speaker 1: the all these things accumulated to twelve hours, isn't I Yeah, 657 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:16,840 Speaker 1: I watched Succession twelve times, and uh, I think I 658 00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:19,640 Speaker 1: finally understood it. You know. It took no I didn't 659 00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:23,120 Speaker 1: watch the twelve times, but the finale was fucking awesome. 660 00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:26,160 Speaker 1: I mean I saw Andrew he was watching, and he goes, 661 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:29,840 Speaker 1: what the fuck it's like? He was watching? It was 662 00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:35,040 Speaker 1: crazy a slow play like shows nowadays, you know, they 663 00:34:35,120 --> 00:34:38,120 Speaker 1: all come out all ten at the same time. You 664 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:41,719 Speaker 1: watch maybe seven in a row. You know, you're just 665 00:34:41,760 --> 00:34:45,560 Speaker 1: like whatever, it's kind of background. Succession is just slow moving. 666 00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:50,320 Speaker 1: One a week, it builds and it builds, and fucking 667 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:54,040 Speaker 1: the finale was last night, and it just all accumulated 668 00:34:54,280 --> 00:34:59,560 Speaker 1: to so much drama and hilarity and just fucking backstabbing, 669 00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:06,080 Speaker 1: and it was awes rich. Like I I really like God, 670 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,200 Speaker 1: I wish I could share it with you, but I 671 00:35:08,239 --> 00:35:11,879 Speaker 1: really I'm gonna watch it. I want you to watch 672 00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,279 Speaker 1: The Morning Show. If anyone out there's watched season two 673 00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:17,640 Speaker 1: of The Morning Show, what the fuck? I can't even 674 00:35:17,719 --> 00:35:21,640 Speaker 1: believe that what happened happened on The Morning Show. And 675 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:24,400 Speaker 1: I'm talking about episode seven or eight, you know what happened. 676 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:29,719 Speaker 1: And I was truly profoundly affected by it. I'm not okay. 677 00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:33,120 Speaker 1: I'm still not okay. And I watched it five days 678 00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:35,919 Speaker 1: ago and to meet everyone watched. I mean The Morning 679 00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:39,200 Speaker 1: Show Season two came out a while ago, like months ago. 680 00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:43,000 Speaker 1: People I can't believe I didn't see like people just 681 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,200 Speaker 1: in the streets screaming about it. Like sometimes you watch 682 00:35:45,239 --> 00:35:46,480 Speaker 1: the show. I mean, I bet you feel the same 683 00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:49,440 Speaker 1: way about succession of Like people talking to me about 684 00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:51,719 Speaker 1: this today, people are like, if you go onto, I mean, 685 00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:57,160 Speaker 1: it's the finality lived up because it's all about fucking 686 00:35:57,160 --> 00:36:01,560 Speaker 1: greed out there these fucking children who are so underappreciative 687 00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:04,520 Speaker 1: of their father, but the father is a piece of ship, 688 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,279 Speaker 1: Like yeah, and then this is the guy that you 689 00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:13,200 Speaker 1: don't expect the fucking Okay, no spoilers, and you know what, 690 00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:17,000 Speaker 1: fucking someone spoiled Sex in the City for me right away, 691 00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:22,279 Speaker 1: Remy Casimir. You know what. She on her on her Instagram. 692 00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:24,920 Speaker 1: She instantly spoils a big plot point of Sex in 693 00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:27,120 Speaker 1: the City that I think happens fairly early in it. 694 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,120 Speaker 1: I watched the first episode of Sex in the City, 695 00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:32,000 Speaker 1: the new one, and and it's called um and just 696 00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:35,120 Speaker 1: like that, because that's what you know. Sarahdisko Berke says 697 00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:38,319 Speaker 1: a lot it is filled with kut, you guys, I 698 00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:40,960 Speaker 1: mean that show is already as fun because Samantha would 699 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:44,000 Speaker 1: always be like, I'll take white sauce on my pasta 700 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:46,680 Speaker 1: and on my face. You know, it's always like a kilne. 701 00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:50,239 Speaker 1: But man, there are so many kid things like I 702 00:36:51,080 --> 00:36:55,720 Speaker 1: was deeply uncomfortable for a lot of that showed Meno 703 00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:59,360 Speaker 1: Pause in the Suburbs at this point, they look great 704 00:36:59,680 --> 00:37:03,239 Speaker 1: and they're cute, but just carry is on a podcast 705 00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,880 Speaker 1: and it's it's like a podcast with us assist male 706 00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:10,960 Speaker 1: played by Bobby Lee, assist female played by Saraghis Parker, 707 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,400 Speaker 1: and like someone who represents like a queer non binary 708 00:37:13,480 --> 00:37:16,600 Speaker 1: woman who and they're both comics, Bobby and the woman 709 00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:19,200 Speaker 1: they're not playing. I forget the woman's um name. I 710 00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:21,640 Speaker 1: feel like i've met her before. She's they're both great, 711 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:25,279 Speaker 1: but it's just like watching a podcast on TV is 712 00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:28,719 Speaker 1: weird and they're asking Carrie about masturbating. They're like, oh, 713 00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:31,000 Speaker 1: have you ever masked? Where? Where would you masturbate in public? 714 00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:33,160 Speaker 1: Because they're talking about public transit people master reading, and 715 00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:39,040 Speaker 1: Carrious like, um, I mean, I just I don't think 716 00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:40,799 Speaker 1: I want to talk about that, and it's like this 717 00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:44,520 Speaker 1: is this is not Carrie Bradshaw that we know, but 718 00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:47,120 Speaker 1: maybe they're trying to prove that she's changed and she's 719 00:37:47,120 --> 00:37:49,560 Speaker 1: gonna find herself now and she's gonna become brashin It's 720 00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:52,319 Speaker 1: kind of a cool message that like, it's okay to be, 721 00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,839 Speaker 1: to be, to not have secrets anymore, to not have 722 00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:58,719 Speaker 1: these taboos that you won't talk about. So maybe, um, 723 00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:00,520 Speaker 1: maybe able to get better. I'm gonna stay with it. 724 00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:02,680 Speaker 1: But um, do we have time for the news or 725 00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:05,000 Speaker 1: do we just blow past it? Oh? Yeah, let's get 726 00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:14,239 Speaker 1: to the news. Oh boy, it's Monday, folks. You know 727 00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:16,879 Speaker 1: what that means. It is Monday. We've already talked about that. 728 00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:19,839 Speaker 1: But hey, I hope you're having all the swells, all 729 00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:26,720 Speaker 1: of them, even you, uh, Steve. We've covered Dave, Steve 730 00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:30,040 Speaker 1: and what was the last name you did? Generic names 731 00:38:30,080 --> 00:38:32,839 Speaker 1: potentially Jeff, but I'd have to go over my notes. 732 00:38:33,600 --> 00:38:35,719 Speaker 1: I have all the names written down, and I'm sure 733 00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:42,680 Speaker 1: you do. Yeah, they're labeled under random names that, uh 734 00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:46,439 Speaker 1: that are boring as fuck. Okay. A woman who makes 735 00:38:46,440 --> 00:38:49,680 Speaker 1: a fortune on only fans for her unique look says 736 00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:54,480 Speaker 1: that people call her a demon after getting her eyeballs tattooed. 737 00:38:55,000 --> 00:39:00,600 Speaker 1: That seems like a logical response from people, she shouldn't 738 00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:03,479 Speaker 1: be surprised. Okay, So she got her eyes tattooed. There's 739 00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:06,040 Speaker 1: black and that literally looks exactly like my eyes looked 740 00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:08,399 Speaker 1: like this weekend when I got liquid eyeliner in my 741 00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:12,279 Speaker 1: waterline and it just made my whole eye black. That's 742 00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:15,560 Speaker 1: what it looks like. Yeah, like liquid eyeliner. I do 743 00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:18,240 Speaker 1: it in the waterline. It changes everything. But you're supposed 744 00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:21,080 Speaker 1: to because I didn't have, um a pencil to use 745 00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:25,000 Speaker 1: a pencil for eyeliner, you know, doesn't like bleed. It 746 00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:27,160 Speaker 1: just is more like a pencil. But this was like 747 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,960 Speaker 1: a marker, and the marker just bled into my eye 748 00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:32,000 Speaker 1: because my eyes wet, and then it made my eye 749 00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:33,480 Speaker 1: black and I had to put in a cute tip 750 00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:37,120 Speaker 1: and clean up my eye. That girl, um, I guess 751 00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:40,600 Speaker 1: she's going to grow old with that, you know, with 752 00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:43,919 Speaker 1: all those I mean, he says that she's never felt 753 00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:50,360 Speaker 1: more comfortable in her own skin from Travis Barker because 754 00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:53,000 Speaker 1: someone said something similar like, oh, you're gonna be sixty 755 00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:55,160 Speaker 1: five with all that. He goes, Yeah, I'm gonna be 756 00:39:56,640 --> 00:40:01,680 Speaker 1: with There's gonna be thousands of six year olds with tattoos, 757 00:40:02,440 --> 00:40:04,839 Speaker 1: And was there a thing back in the day where 758 00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:06,960 Speaker 1: they were like, you're gonna be sixty five with that 759 00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:10,160 Speaker 1: like that, you know, permanent decisions that people were making 760 00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,880 Speaker 1: back in like the forties and fifties, sixties seven, you 761 00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,600 Speaker 1: know that are older. Now we're just starting to see 762 00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:20,840 Speaker 1: tattoos age, like real, like a lot of tattoos. Yes, yes, 763 00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:24,040 Speaker 1: we're just seeing those people reaching into the ages where 764 00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:30,239 Speaker 1: it's like gravity. I mean long hairs, having long hair tattoos. 765 00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:34,560 Speaker 1: But that's not it's not permanent. No, I know even though, 766 00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:37,040 Speaker 1: but that it doesn't age well because guys who make 767 00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:40,680 Speaker 1: their thing long hair, when they start losing their hair, oh, 768 00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:44,359 Speaker 1: there's nothing worse than a little wispy ponytail. Like when 769 00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:46,400 Speaker 1: it's this much hair in a ponytail, I want to 770 00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:50,160 Speaker 1: I want to scream. It's the best because the ponytail 771 00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:53,080 Speaker 1: just keeps you started like here and then just keeps 772 00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:58,160 Speaker 1: going farther farther back. Um, I mean your mom got 773 00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:03,759 Speaker 1: permanent makeup, right, she got tattoos. Yeah, and I bet 774 00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:06,800 Speaker 1: that still looks good. Eyeliner is one thing that um 775 00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:08,839 Speaker 1: on a on a lady never really, I don't think 776 00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:13,880 Speaker 1: goes out of style. Um. I think, uh yeah, I 777 00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:17,160 Speaker 1: think she just got so tired of fucking the tediousness 778 00:41:17,280 --> 00:41:20,040 Speaker 1: of it. She was fucking like whatever. And and Jews 779 00:41:20,080 --> 00:41:22,160 Speaker 1: aren't supposed to get tattoos, is what we were told 780 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,960 Speaker 1: our whole life. And I used to work for a 781 00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:28,440 Speaker 1: permanent makeup artist, and um, we had a lot of 782 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:32,320 Speaker 1: Orthodox women who would come and do permanent makeup because 783 00:41:32,400 --> 00:41:35,600 Speaker 1: you can't do your makeup on like schabbis or whatever, 784 00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:39,719 Speaker 1: and eyebrows and all of that, and um, the Rabbis 785 00:41:39,760 --> 00:41:42,000 Speaker 1: approved it because it was like a certain amount of 786 00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:48,040 Speaker 1: layers of skin from what I remember. Whatever, it's all nonsense, no, 787 00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:50,960 Speaker 1: but my mom said that like she could get tattoos 788 00:41:50,960 --> 00:41:54,600 Speaker 1: because it was what's the word It starts with cosmetic 789 00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:58,520 Speaker 1: or it starts with an a umsthetic And I go, 790 00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:03,000 Speaker 1: I go, yeah, that's what. And that's what every tattoo is. 791 00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:08,560 Speaker 1: Every tattoo is aesthetic. Like that's some and yeah, a 792 00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:13,080 Speaker 1: lot of people with alopecia do permanent makeup too, right 793 00:42:13,200 --> 00:42:16,080 Speaker 1: for to make eyebrows and and and you know women 794 00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:18,400 Speaker 1: who have had their nipples removed from uh, you know, 795 00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:22,960 Speaker 1: missectic mastectic missect messectomies. I had a couple of letters 796 00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:25,560 Speaker 1: removed from that word just now. Yeah, my mom goes, 797 00:42:25,640 --> 00:42:28,359 Speaker 1: you know, you can't be buried in a Jewish cemetery. 798 00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:32,719 Speaker 1: And it's like I've okay, Like I don't really know 799 00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:36,399 Speaker 1: what the fear of, Like, oh, how do I want 800 00:42:36,400 --> 00:42:37,719 Speaker 1: to be? What do you want to do with your 801 00:42:37,719 --> 00:42:43,080 Speaker 1: body after it's over? Whatever you want? Honestly, I dedicate 802 00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:45,080 Speaker 1: my body to guys who would wipe the funk dead 803 00:42:45,080 --> 00:42:48,240 Speaker 1: people because I'm dead. I don't. I mean I literally 804 00:42:48,719 --> 00:42:52,920 Speaker 1: if that was a thing that you could do, donate 805 00:42:52,960 --> 00:42:57,279 Speaker 1: your body to necrophiliacs, go, I just don't. I know 806 00:42:57,360 --> 00:43:00,920 Speaker 1: that's like you do it when you're alive. You played 807 00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:06,880 Speaker 1: the dead. Yes, I mean I love Coffin style, just 808 00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:11,520 Speaker 1: sitting with like chalky makeup on. Wait? Should I do 809 00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:14,040 Speaker 1: an open casket? If I die? Like open caskets? How 810 00:43:14,040 --> 00:43:15,799 Speaker 1: do you feel about that? I kind of like them. 811 00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:17,839 Speaker 1: I like to see the person one last time, even 812 00:43:17,840 --> 00:43:20,280 Speaker 1: though it's just never what they look like. Everyone always 813 00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:22,200 Speaker 1: looks like Abraham Lincoln. I'm gonna do an open casket, 814 00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:24,160 Speaker 1: but I'll just be a little door for my penis 815 00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:28,040 Speaker 1: so everyone could come and just be like I want 816 00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:31,239 Speaker 1: to I want to see that assholet I want a 817 00:43:31,239 --> 00:43:34,960 Speaker 1: corner's report on that thing. They're gonna be like, you're 818 00:43:35,160 --> 00:43:36,759 Speaker 1: no matter what you die of, they're gonna be like 819 00:43:36,800 --> 00:43:39,440 Speaker 1: it was this what he had a gunshot wound back 820 00:43:39,480 --> 00:43:41,400 Speaker 1: and get stabbed in the neck and people be like 821 00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:45,959 Speaker 1: it was his asshole, It was his asshole. No he died, 822 00:43:46,000 --> 00:43:50,240 Speaker 1: he led out in like two minutes. No, No, we've 823 00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:55,520 Speaker 1: got a canyon back here. Um My, my assholes. The 824 00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:58,439 Speaker 1: black hole of like like it could just suck things 825 00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:01,759 Speaker 1: in at any moment, you know, like when people like 826 00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:04,560 Speaker 1: tap a spoon on a dessert and then it like 827 00:44:04,680 --> 00:44:07,920 Speaker 1: cracks open a crumb brulet. Maybe is that what your 828 00:44:07,920 --> 00:44:11,000 Speaker 1: asshole looks like? That that hole? That a spoon cracking 829 00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,840 Speaker 1: on it a crumb brulet. You don't know what it 830 00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,480 Speaker 1: looks like you because how does Steve you want to 831 00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:20,480 Speaker 1: play the piano? Look, that's how you're able to like 832 00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:23,760 Speaker 1: sense what it is. Look, it's the same way freaking 833 00:44:23,800 --> 00:44:26,879 Speaker 1: Beethoven can still hear music. I I but assholes look 834 00:44:26,960 --> 00:44:30,440 Speaker 1: bad anyway. Like I mean, they look fine, I guess, 835 00:44:30,640 --> 00:44:34,200 Speaker 1: but they're not like this beautiful. You know. It's the 836 00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:37,840 Speaker 1: same way I feel about vaginas, like aesthetically vaginas aren't 837 00:44:37,880 --> 00:44:40,080 Speaker 1: just like they look like flowers. I guess you could 838 00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:41,759 Speaker 1: be like, oh, that's beautiful. But that's a good point. 839 00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,000 Speaker 1: You know, that's a good point because your asshole to 840 00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:48,799 Speaker 1: be that that's of anything to be really hideous on 841 00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:51,279 Speaker 1: you and assholes the best thing to be. That's a 842 00:44:51,360 --> 00:44:54,840 Speaker 1: question about Andrew's asshole. Go ahead, no, please do. I 843 00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:56,759 Speaker 1: was wondering, so you won't look at it with a mayor, 844 00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:58,759 Speaker 1: but have you ever touched it to kind of get 845 00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:03,240 Speaker 1: like the landscape? Yeah, that's the Stevie wonder aspect. Yeah. Yeah, 846 00:45:03,320 --> 00:45:06,000 Speaker 1: he's Helen colored it. Yeah, so I could draw it 847 00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:10,399 Speaker 1: because he rubs he rubs stuff on it. Okay, got it? 848 00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:13,319 Speaker 1: So is it like a star shape? Like? Is it 849 00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:16,680 Speaker 1: does it have like edges? No, there's like, um, there's 850 00:45:16,719 --> 00:45:22,000 Speaker 1: like a what's it called, like a like a tonsil 851 00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:27,880 Speaker 1: thing that like the hemorrhoid if you, oh, the little 852 00:45:27,880 --> 00:45:29,879 Speaker 1: tab on the outside of it. But it's pretty long. 853 00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:33,839 Speaker 1: At this point, I could probably get it removed. Wait, 854 00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:37,399 Speaker 1: does it does your like when you poop, does that 855 00:45:37,560 --> 00:45:40,920 Speaker 1: little tab lift like? Does it and scrape along? Like? 856 00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:42,840 Speaker 1: Is it like coming out of a doggie door? Like? 857 00:45:42,880 --> 00:45:45,400 Speaker 1: Does it have a does your asshole have a flap 858 00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:48,839 Speaker 1: over it? Like a, yeah, I have a flap hoole 859 00:45:49,640 --> 00:45:52,400 Speaker 1: mud flap. Yeah, I do have a mud flap, But 860 00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:55,319 Speaker 1: I'm serious. Does it Does it overhang your asshole or 861 00:45:55,360 --> 00:46:06,000 Speaker 1: is it beneath it? Have you done that before? Maybe? Yes? Okay, 862 00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:10,560 Speaker 1: next news story? What if that is breaking news? Andrew 863 00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:14,719 Speaker 1: Colin admits tucking his hemorrhoid into his asshole. My asshole 864 00:46:14,880 --> 00:46:27,640 Speaker 1: has a drawbridge, That's what I'm picturing, dude, And it's 865 00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:30,560 Speaker 1: just a piece of ship going I make cross and 866 00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:33,200 Speaker 1: then my asshole just opens up and he goes, you 867 00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:35,440 Speaker 1: make cross? God? Why do I want to see it 868 00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,839 Speaker 1: so bad? I know, I think the more about it, 869 00:46:38,920 --> 00:46:42,000 Speaker 1: the more she wants. She wants to get in there, 870 00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:46,920 Speaker 1: just because it's just like, yeah, just curiosity killed my asshole. 871 00:46:47,560 --> 00:46:51,960 Speaker 1: Um yeah, it's it's it is. Um you know it's something. 872 00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:54,600 Speaker 1: It will definitely kill me. I mean I joke about it, 873 00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:57,239 Speaker 1: but like I do have to get a colonoscopy again soon, 874 00:46:57,360 --> 00:47:01,240 Speaker 1: like I had polyps that were cancers. It will probably 875 00:47:01,239 --> 00:47:06,279 Speaker 1: be the thing that kills me. Like, no, would you 876 00:47:06,360 --> 00:47:10,160 Speaker 1: rather be stabbed in the Yeah? I want you to 877 00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:14,839 Speaker 1: get stabbed in the neck. That's so sad at your 878 00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:17,880 Speaker 1: funeral though, What do I want some dips? Yeah, Like, 879 00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:19,560 Speaker 1: would you want it to be a you want you 880 00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:21,279 Speaker 1: want a little door for your dick so we can 881 00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,040 Speaker 1: all see that in your casket and open. Yeah, And 882 00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:26,600 Speaker 1: if it's if you guys are worried about it being open, 883 00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:30,160 Speaker 1: we could just do a little like glass, little visual 884 00:47:30,320 --> 00:47:33,360 Speaker 1: kind of thing, like you know, like a skyglass for 885 00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:36,680 Speaker 1: my dick. And I want my dick to be fluffed 886 00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:39,640 Speaker 1: a little bit because the last thing I want is 887 00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:43,680 Speaker 1: from people to go wow, yeah, and let's stuff it. Yeah, 888 00:47:43,680 --> 00:47:46,400 Speaker 1: So before I die, just make sure i'm hard somewhat 889 00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:50,040 Speaker 1: not fully though, because i'd be embarrassing too. So I 890 00:47:50,080 --> 00:47:56,080 Speaker 1: want to be half hard when you die, and I 891 00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:58,040 Speaker 1: want people to go was he a shower or a 892 00:47:58,160 --> 00:48:01,160 Speaker 1: grower or neither? Would you like to die having sex? 893 00:48:01,280 --> 00:48:02,720 Speaker 1: You know a lot of men die of heart attacks 894 00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:06,200 Speaker 1: while they're like having sex. Would that be would that 895 00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:08,719 Speaker 1: feel good? Do you have that be your story? I 896 00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:10,719 Speaker 1: think it'd be hilarious to die jerking off. I just 897 00:48:10,719 --> 00:48:12,480 Speaker 1: don't know if i'd want to do that to the 898 00:48:12,560 --> 00:48:15,400 Speaker 1: other person, like they'd never be able to have sex again. 899 00:48:17,040 --> 00:48:19,560 Speaker 1: If you Oh you want them to go on and 900 00:48:19,640 --> 00:48:22,680 Speaker 1: have more partners after you. Yeah, I would like that. 901 00:48:22,760 --> 00:48:25,160 Speaker 1: I mean I would like to at least once before 902 00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:35,719 Speaker 1: they die. Okay, next story. UM, let's see here. Um. Sorry, 903 00:48:35,719 --> 00:48:38,120 Speaker 1: I'm reading off the computer because my phone is all right. 904 00:48:38,400 --> 00:48:40,000 Speaker 1: Do you want me to share screen? I got you. 905 00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:44,040 Speaker 1: A CNN producer is charged with attempting to entice miners 906 00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:46,840 Speaker 1: for sex. He was able to convince the mothers of 907 00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:50,560 Speaker 1: young daughters to allow the girls to be sexually submissive 908 00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:55,560 Speaker 1: to him. Oh God, who is this? John Griffin conveyed thoughts, 909 00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,600 Speaker 1: including one that a woman is a woman regardless of age, 910 00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:02,799 Speaker 1: and that women should be sexually subservient and inferior to men. 911 00:49:03,160 --> 00:49:05,719 Speaker 1: On occasion, he gave three thousand dollar playing tickets to 912 00:49:05,760 --> 00:49:07,880 Speaker 1: a mom and a nine year old to fly to 913 00:49:07,920 --> 00:49:11,240 Speaker 1: his home in Boston re engage a daughter in unlawful 914 00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:17,799 Speaker 1: sexual activity. Awful, Ah, that is how. I don't even Also, 915 00:49:17,920 --> 00:49:21,160 Speaker 1: Chris Cuomo's producer. From what I understand it was, who 916 00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:26,560 Speaker 1: Chris Cuomo's producer? Oh my god, Oh, this guy's a producer. Okay, 917 00:49:26,680 --> 00:49:31,839 Speaker 1: Jesus Christ, Oh man, come on, if you're into this ship, 918 00:49:32,120 --> 00:49:34,560 Speaker 1: I know you don't choose it, but you got it, 919 00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:37,880 Speaker 1: Like you've gotta make sure you protect people from yourself. 920 00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:41,719 Speaker 1: Don't indulge in these things. Go get help Jesus Christ. 921 00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:47,640 Speaker 1: Everyone's going after CNN like like, oh now, well, accuse 922 00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:50,120 Speaker 1: the predator, and like that's where we've gotten to is 923 00:49:50,160 --> 00:49:53,759 Speaker 1: like who's the bigger predator? They get excited where Fox 924 00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:56,799 Speaker 1: News gets the right gets excited because we have a 925 00:49:56,800 --> 00:50:02,040 Speaker 1: pedophile in the excitedly people die that aren't vaxed, Like 926 00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:05,879 Speaker 1: we're pretty fucked up people like we are fucking fucked up, 927 00:50:06,320 --> 00:50:09,000 Speaker 1: and this guy's obviously fucked up. The moms. I wonder 928 00:50:09,040 --> 00:50:12,600 Speaker 1: how this guy got caught. Um oh, because he was 929 00:50:12,719 --> 00:50:17,360 Speaker 1: using a kick and Google hangouts to solicit these people, 930 00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:22,240 Speaker 1: and I guess somehow the FBI got tip or something. 931 00:50:22,560 --> 00:50:27,200 Speaker 1: Oh god, these guys are so thank god. Horny men 932 00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:31,279 Speaker 1: are stupid, I mean, thank god. It's how so many 933 00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:34,879 Speaker 1: of them get caught because they just can't help themselves. 934 00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:38,560 Speaker 1: But it's just it's so tragic and that poor child 935 00:50:38,800 --> 00:50:41,240 Speaker 1: who has to deal with the fact that their parents. 936 00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:45,960 Speaker 1: You know, sometimes when you're molested, like it's your parents, 937 00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:48,719 Speaker 1: it was like negligence possibly on your parents part, but 938 00:50:48,760 --> 00:50:51,160 Speaker 1: they didn't facilitate it a lot of times, and at 939 00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:53,160 Speaker 1: least you can have peace of mind knowing that maybe 940 00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:54,719 Speaker 1: they didn't protect you in the way they needed to. 941 00:50:54,880 --> 00:50:57,520 Speaker 1: But um, and a lot of times they do everything 942 00:50:57,560 --> 00:50:59,560 Speaker 1: they can and it still happens. I don't part of 943 00:50:59,560 --> 00:51:02,120 Speaker 1: me is are really wildly as fun and they'll get 944 00:51:02,160 --> 00:51:04,200 Speaker 1: you they want to. So it wasn't your fault. No 945 00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:06,120 Speaker 1: matter what happened to you, it was not your fault. 946 00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:09,560 Speaker 1: But to have your mom fucking well, here's the thing. 947 00:51:09,600 --> 00:51:12,600 Speaker 1: Though he paid three thousand dollars in playing tickets, maybe 948 00:51:12,640 --> 00:51:15,640 Speaker 1: the mom was just sick of flying. Like spirit it 949 00:51:15,680 --> 00:51:17,840 Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, I could fly first class 950 00:51:18,080 --> 00:51:22,640 Speaker 1: on American you know. That's like I'll give up my 951 00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:24,920 Speaker 1: kid to have that seat, you know what I mean. Like, 952 00:51:25,520 --> 00:51:27,920 Speaker 1: that's how bad can you imagine sitting next to like 953 00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:30,200 Speaker 1: we could have been sitting next to these well, like 954 00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:32,319 Speaker 1: you would watch a mom with her daughter and you 955 00:51:32,440 --> 00:51:37,640 Speaker 1: just have no idea, you like, if you see, it'd 956 00:51:37,680 --> 00:51:41,520 Speaker 1: be weird. Notice signs have been up there, up everywhere. Now, 957 00:51:41,560 --> 00:51:45,480 Speaker 1: I mean, I love it because obviously it's they're tackling 958 00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:48,279 Speaker 1: human trafficking and trying to get these girls out and 959 00:51:48,719 --> 00:51:51,960 Speaker 1: boys too, But I mean, I really don't think that. 960 00:51:52,200 --> 00:51:55,080 Speaker 1: Do you see those signs as like in the stalls 961 00:51:55,160 --> 00:52:00,480 Speaker 1: in the airport too, on the wall in uh Okay, Yeah, 962 00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:02,840 Speaker 1: where women for sure, you know the ones that are 963 00:52:02,840 --> 00:52:04,919 Speaker 1: saying like if you're in distress or if you are 964 00:52:05,200 --> 00:52:10,000 Speaker 1: being held against your will, there's help, text this number. 965 00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:11,799 Speaker 1: It's like, well, they don't have a phone or tell 966 00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:14,400 Speaker 1: a flight attendant. That's in the bathroom on planes is 967 00:52:14,480 --> 00:52:19,040 Speaker 1: tell a flight attendant and there's you know, but these people, 968 00:52:19,120 --> 00:52:21,520 Speaker 1: these kids, no no, no, nothing else. They and they 969 00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:25,840 Speaker 1: think they're gonna be you know what, who's easier to 970 00:52:25,840 --> 00:52:28,319 Speaker 1: trick than a child? You know, these these guys are 971 00:52:28,320 --> 00:52:34,319 Speaker 1: going after the most no, honestly not. They're going after 972 00:52:34,680 --> 00:52:38,680 Speaker 1: the most vulnerable. Prayer to get a kid to believe 973 00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:42,200 Speaker 1: fucking anything, and they just you know, instill this fear 974 00:52:42,239 --> 00:52:44,680 Speaker 1: in them that they're gonna their parents will be taken away, 975 00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:47,840 Speaker 1: they're gonna get they'll die. You know, kid can be 976 00:52:47,880 --> 00:52:50,080 Speaker 1: tricked into so many things. It's just we have to 977 00:52:50,120 --> 00:52:53,600 Speaker 1: protect them. And you got to look out for suspicious 978 00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:57,880 Speaker 1: activity and rely on your gut, even if you end 979 00:52:57,960 --> 00:53:00,480 Speaker 1: up embarrassing yourself because you're worried about something else. Like, 980 00:53:01,080 --> 00:53:03,239 Speaker 1: I gotta start looking at things a little differently too, 981 00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:06,880 Speaker 1: because it is human trafficking is happening all the fucking time. 982 00:53:07,520 --> 00:53:09,560 Speaker 1: And you just see a young girl with a guy 983 00:53:09,719 --> 00:53:12,799 Speaker 1: and you think, oh, that's just Andrew and his girlfriend. 984 00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:17,799 Speaker 1: But it's it's it could be a relationship, a consensual relationship, 985 00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:21,040 Speaker 1: but it could maybe be something else. Or that's a 986 00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:24,759 Speaker 1: guy with his kids. Look her mom, I paid her 987 00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:29,600 Speaker 1: seven thousand dollars. Okay, no, But here's the thing, like 988 00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:32,480 Speaker 1: with the CNN thing, I love when people go, well, 989 00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:35,800 Speaker 1: you know, if you act, it's kind of the approach 990 00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:38,120 Speaker 1: of like if you act better than or if you 991 00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:40,840 Speaker 1: act or if you say you're great, really you're a 992 00:53:40,880 --> 00:53:44,440 Speaker 1: piece of shit, you know. There. They love that, like 993 00:53:44,440 --> 00:53:47,960 Speaker 1: like people love when people like funk up that act 994 00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:51,080 Speaker 1: better than the other person, you know what I mean, 995 00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:54,080 Speaker 1: Like they fucking love that. Well, usually that is what 996 00:53:54,239 --> 00:53:56,960 Speaker 1: happens because these people the monsters, and they have or 997 00:53:57,000 --> 00:53:59,480 Speaker 1: they're sociopathic and they actually do think they're better and 998 00:53:59,520 --> 00:54:04,399 Speaker 1: they walk round with a false sense of superiority. But um, yeah, 999 00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:07,440 Speaker 1: I mean, but who doesn't like to see that anything? 1000 00:54:07,440 --> 00:54:09,399 Speaker 1: All I want to see is people who think they're 1001 00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:14,359 Speaker 1: the ship. That's that's the most soothing balm to my 1002 00:54:14,760 --> 00:54:19,360 Speaker 1: insecure soulder I can imagine is watching people fail miserably. 1003 00:54:19,400 --> 00:54:22,080 Speaker 1: I love nothing better than someone with an insane amount 1004 00:54:22,080 --> 00:54:27,880 Speaker 1: of confidence eating dick. It's the best. One. Last story 1005 00:54:27,880 --> 00:54:31,080 Speaker 1: before we go. A thief was a little I think 1006 00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:33,840 Speaker 1: too cocky because he got crushed. He got crushed to 1007 00:54:33,920 --> 00:54:42,680 Speaker 1: death by a prius well, the catalytic catalytic, so he 1008 00:54:42,719 --> 00:54:45,200 Speaker 1: propped it up and then the thing fell on him. Yeah. 1009 00:54:45,360 --> 00:54:47,879 Speaker 1: The findings on the scene indicated that at some point 1010 00:54:47,960 --> 00:54:50,200 Speaker 1: during the cutting of the exhaust pipe, the vehicle fell 1011 00:54:50,239 --> 00:54:53,480 Speaker 1: off the automated jack and on top of the male subject. 1012 00:54:53,560 --> 00:54:56,920 Speaker 1: You would think of prea wouldn't be heavy enough, but 1013 00:54:56,960 --> 00:54:59,960 Speaker 1: I guess it was. It would be like a styrophone 1014 00:55:00,360 --> 00:55:02,239 Speaker 1: that you could just like kick off yourself like a 1015 00:55:02,239 --> 00:55:09,960 Speaker 1: big He died from just being embarrassed. It wasn't the way. Yeah, well, 1016 00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:15,080 Speaker 1: I mean that's sad. It's sad, you know, Like I know, 1017 00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:18,120 Speaker 1: he was a criminal and he was doing nefarious ship, 1018 00:55:18,200 --> 00:55:21,600 Speaker 1: but no one wants to be stealing catalytic converters to 1019 00:55:21,680 --> 00:55:25,239 Speaker 1: make a living. It's you know, no one would, no 1020 00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:28,080 Speaker 1: one would that's not no one wants to be. I mean, 1021 00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:30,560 Speaker 1: maybe some people do love being a criminal, but that 1022 00:55:30,640 --> 00:55:33,080 Speaker 1: poor guy, like that wasn't the end. That's not what 1023 00:55:33,120 --> 00:55:35,000 Speaker 1: he was wanting to do. I feel I feel sad 1024 00:55:35,040 --> 00:55:38,759 Speaker 1: for him. Um, I'm sure I was like, that's like 1025 00:55:38,800 --> 00:55:41,560 Speaker 1: a fucking mouse trap though, you know, I mean it's 1026 00:55:41,640 --> 00:55:46,200 Speaker 1: a I think he probably thought, even if his vally'd 1027 00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:51,800 Speaker 1: be fine, but you know, shout out to him and everything, yeah, 1028 00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:55,760 Speaker 1: and his family and shout out and the guy who's 1029 00:55:55,920 --> 00:56:00,560 Speaker 1: press has to be washed now, oh man and crushed 1030 00:56:00,560 --> 00:56:05,560 Speaker 1: to death would fucking suck. Dude. I can't even That's 1031 00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:07,799 Speaker 1: got to be up there in worst ways to die. 1032 00:56:07,920 --> 00:56:10,920 Speaker 1: Drowning is a is a top that's a top one, 1033 00:56:11,000 --> 00:56:13,960 Speaker 1: but being just slowly crushed to death by something heavy 1034 00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:16,080 Speaker 1: when you feel it and then it just keeps on going, 1035 00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:19,840 Speaker 1: and it's it's got to be slow. I mean, like 1036 00:56:19,920 --> 00:56:24,360 Speaker 1: drowning in like a baby pool, Like it's just pathetic. 1037 00:56:25,080 --> 00:56:29,840 Speaker 1: You know, that isn't the car that you want to 1038 00:56:30,200 --> 00:56:34,040 Speaker 1: you want to get, you know, a Honda Leaf or 1039 00:56:34,120 --> 00:56:39,640 Speaker 1: Nissan Leaf. At least it wasn't that vea. It's just like, yeah, 1040 00:56:39,680 --> 00:56:41,640 Speaker 1: you wanted to be a semi truck. You know, you 1041 00:56:41,640 --> 00:56:44,799 Speaker 1: want to get smashed by a math truck, that's what 1042 00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:47,960 Speaker 1: you want, or a sprinter van like you want to be. 1043 00:56:48,400 --> 00:56:52,920 Speaker 1: It's got to be something big, but not a you know, uh, 1044 00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:59,160 Speaker 1: what are those cubes with the hamsters that dance sion? Yeah, 1045 00:56:59,400 --> 00:57:02,520 Speaker 1: that would suck. I just rather than not say the 1046 00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:05,200 Speaker 1: make of the model of the car if something happens 1047 00:57:05,200 --> 00:57:07,719 Speaker 1: to me and just say that four wheels don't man, 1048 00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:10,239 Speaker 1: it would suck to Diana. Goddamn uber. You know, that 1049 00:57:10,280 --> 00:57:13,279 Speaker 1: would be the fucking worst being in an uber and 1050 00:57:13,320 --> 00:57:15,680 Speaker 1: being like I didn't need to even I could have 1051 00:57:15,760 --> 00:57:18,080 Speaker 1: gone with a different car if that guy would have 1052 00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:22,840 Speaker 1: been running. Like, there's so many what ifs in New York. 1053 00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:26,200 Speaker 1: Capt I got a wreck and I just got out. 1054 00:57:26,240 --> 00:57:27,720 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not dealing with this ship I 1055 00:57:27,760 --> 00:57:30,400 Speaker 1: got in. I've gotten pulled over before and just gotten 1056 00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:32,560 Speaker 1: out and been like to the cop like I'm not 1057 00:57:32,880 --> 00:57:34,720 Speaker 1: part of this. I'm going to just go. But that's 1058 00:57:34,720 --> 00:57:36,600 Speaker 1: when I was drinking. I was like, it's not a 1059 00:57:36,600 --> 00:57:38,919 Speaker 1: big deal. I'll just leave to see. I just laughed. 1060 00:57:38,920 --> 00:57:42,720 Speaker 1: I got another cab. When you're drinking, all you do 1061 00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:46,080 Speaker 1: is care about yourself. It's just the weirdest place, even 1062 00:57:46,080 --> 00:57:48,120 Speaker 1: when you're sober. That's I just like did it. I 1063 00:57:48,200 --> 00:57:50,800 Speaker 1: wasn't making good decisions. But last night when we were 1064 00:57:50,800 --> 00:57:52,160 Speaker 1: taking the hotel, and I was like, man, the last 1065 00:57:52,200 --> 00:57:54,240 Speaker 1: time I was here, I was drinking so much, and 1066 00:57:54,240 --> 00:57:57,040 Speaker 1: I was like, I don't know, Like and Andrew's like, god, 1067 00:57:57,080 --> 00:57:59,000 Speaker 1: I we I wish I would have known you back then. 1068 00:57:59,080 --> 00:58:00,720 Speaker 1: I'm like you kind of you. I feel like I'm 1069 00:58:00,800 --> 00:58:04,680 Speaker 1: the same. I don't really remember being that much diff 1070 00:58:04,800 --> 00:58:06,160 Speaker 1: I was like, I might have been a little bit 1071 00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:11,960 Speaker 1: happier I was dying. But now I don't have, um, 1072 00:58:12,080 --> 00:58:14,200 Speaker 1: you know, I don't have immense guilt all the time, 1073 00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:19,439 Speaker 1: and that that that equals something that was very last. 1074 00:58:19,840 --> 00:58:23,240 Speaker 1: Let's take a break and come back. But why do 1075 00:58:23,280 --> 00:58:30,680 Speaker 1: I care? All right? Why do I care? Why do 1076 00:58:30,760 --> 00:58:35,240 Speaker 1: I care? Why do you care? Nick Michael Strahan goes 1077 00:58:35,560 --> 00:58:40,800 Speaker 1: into space? How do we feel about it? Um? He does? 1078 00:58:40,920 --> 00:58:42,960 Speaker 1: He went? Yeah, he went to space. He became the 1079 00:58:43,000 --> 00:58:47,080 Speaker 1: first American news anchor to fly to space. Following saturdays 1080 00:58:47,800 --> 00:58:56,720 Speaker 1: that the flight by platform the Blue Origin. The eleven 1081 00:58:56,760 --> 00:59:00,480 Speaker 1: minute flight let's ticket holders travel over three times a 1082 00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:03,200 Speaker 1: speed of sound. Float wait list for several minutes and 1083 00:59:03,240 --> 00:59:06,600 Speaker 1: witness life change. It's eleven minute flight. You're not floating 1084 00:59:06,640 --> 00:59:12,959 Speaker 1: for several minutes? Um, wait, he was up there several 1085 00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:15,480 Speaker 1: minutes to Sorry, it's eleven minute flight. And then it 1086 00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:17,920 Speaker 1: says you float wait list for several minutes. Now you 1087 00:59:17,960 --> 00:59:23,680 Speaker 1: don't eleven minutes? Isn't several? Yoh yeah it is? I 1088 00:59:23,720 --> 00:59:29,720 Speaker 1: think several is four more. If I'm saying it's gonna 1089 00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:32,440 Speaker 1: be several hours, what do you think of the taping 1090 00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:34,120 Speaker 1: is gonna take several hours? What do you think several 1091 00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:37,760 Speaker 1: is gonna be? I would say more than from the 1092 00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:40,920 Speaker 1: chunk of time. If it's minutes, I think several minutes 1093 00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:47,120 Speaker 1: is two fifty minutes. Andrew, if I say that our 1094 00:59:47,240 --> 00:59:49,640 Speaker 1: uber is arriving in several minutes, how many minutes is that? 1095 00:59:50,160 --> 00:59:55,840 Speaker 1: Si minutes? No way, does anyone think several minutes is 1096 00:59:55,840 --> 00:59:59,880 Speaker 1: fifty to sixty minutes? You would say about an hour? Then? Yeah, dude, 1097 01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:02,480 Speaker 1: It depends on the chunk of time, Nikki. So several 1098 01:00:02,640 --> 01:00:05,920 Speaker 1: seconds would be thousands of seconds, several minutes would be 1099 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:10,160 Speaker 1: hundreds of minutes. Several hours would be of seven or 1100 01:00:10,200 --> 01:00:14,280 Speaker 1: eight hours. No, no, no one agrees with you on this. 1101 01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:17,360 Speaker 1: I'm already speaking for every bustie. If I say the 1102 01:00:17,400 --> 01:00:19,720 Speaker 1: Uber's arriving in a couple of minutes, that's two minutes. 1103 01:00:20,640 --> 01:00:26,439 Speaker 1: If I say several minutes, it's around four. A few 1104 01:00:26,480 --> 01:00:30,200 Speaker 1: minutes three Uber driver was floating in air in an 1105 01:00:30,360 --> 01:00:34,360 Speaker 1: air shut in a shuttle for several minutes. I would 1106 01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:36,520 Speaker 1: think it was about seven minutes. I would guests several 1107 01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:42,080 Speaker 1: of seven. I mean, call someone asked them, what you 1108 01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:46,400 Speaker 1: think seven minutes. I'll call my parents right now and 1109 01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:48,959 Speaker 1: I'll get them. I'm going to call in the Uber 1110 01:00:49,040 --> 01:00:52,600 Speaker 1: setting because Uber is only that doesn't work. I'm not 1111 01:00:52,640 --> 01:00:55,080 Speaker 1: I'm gonna say they floated in space for several minutes. 1112 01:00:55,080 --> 01:00:57,040 Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask what I think it was. Don't tell 1113 01:00:57,080 --> 01:00:59,960 Speaker 1: them eleven minutes. I'm not. I'm not gonna not say 1114 01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:12,360 Speaker 1: anything else talking about several of the Hey, mom, you're 1115 01:01:12,400 --> 01:01:15,439 Speaker 1: on my podcast. Can I ask you a question? Yes, 1116 01:01:15,640 --> 01:01:23,040 Speaker 1: I'm with Puppy right now. Oh? Is dad there too? By? Hi? 1117 01:01:23,160 --> 01:01:30,840 Speaker 1: Hi Nikki, Hi Poppy, I miss you and I love you. Hey, 1118 01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:40,480 Speaker 1: what's your question? Poppy? Poppy? Are there monsters where? Oh? 1119 01:01:42,400 --> 01:01:46,680 Speaker 1: Right there? Oh? No? Will you protect me from the 1120 01:01:50,080 --> 01:01:53,080 Speaker 1: shaking her head? Yes? Okay, good. Thank you, Poppy. I 1121 01:01:53,120 --> 01:01:56,360 Speaker 1: have a quick question. Mom. If I told you that 1122 01:01:57,280 --> 01:02:01,360 Speaker 1: someone floated in space for several minutes, how many approximately 1123 01:02:01,360 --> 01:02:08,000 Speaker 1: how many minutes would you think that is? For several minutes? Three? Good? 1124 01:02:08,080 --> 01:02:16,440 Speaker 1: Guess there are I know, Poppy. I'm so scared. Okay, 1125 01:02:16,520 --> 01:02:21,680 Speaker 1: several minutes is three? Okay, thank you for that. I'm 1126 01:02:21,680 --> 01:02:23,840 Speaker 1: going to call dad and get his response. Um, Poppy, 1127 01:02:23,880 --> 01:02:29,280 Speaker 1: I love you, Bye bye, Poppy. This family nice meetie. 1128 01:02:30,880 --> 01:02:35,880 Speaker 1: You would call your dumb family, but I can't. Oh, 1129 01:02:36,360 --> 01:02:38,000 Speaker 1: you know my family is not dumb. Okay, I'm gonna 1130 01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:47,920 Speaker 1: I'm gonna not blood. I'll call Matt. I'm calling my 1131 01:02:48,000 --> 01:02:51,480 Speaker 1: dad right now, but i'll call that too. I'll call Anya, 1132 01:02:51,680 --> 01:02:58,040 Speaker 1: I'll call you pick up. And my dad knows what's 1133 01:02:58,080 --> 01:03:03,120 Speaker 1: capable in space. He's very educated about space travel. On 1134 01:03:03,280 --> 01:03:09,280 Speaker 1: pick up glaze dog. Come on, baby, come on, cutie, 1135 01:03:10,280 --> 01:03:16,320 Speaker 1: I'm gonna call Matt. Here's the thing. You gotta say. 1136 01:03:16,360 --> 01:03:19,600 Speaker 1: They were in a space shuttle floating, not just floating, 1137 01:03:21,560 --> 01:03:25,880 Speaker 1: because I'm wanting a guy just they won't be able 1138 01:03:25,920 --> 01:03:27,960 Speaker 1: to hear him floating in a space shuttle. When we 1139 01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:30,520 Speaker 1: say that you're in a space shuttle in space and 1140 01:03:30,520 --> 01:03:34,560 Speaker 1: they floated in space for several minutes? Is that? I mean, 1141 01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:38,160 Speaker 1: this is a non starter, dude, no one you could 1142 01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:41,280 Speaker 1: pull everyone in. People are going to say less than ten. 1143 01:03:42,640 --> 01:03:47,400 Speaker 1: Less than ten don't even make sense. I'm gonna ask 1144 01:03:47,400 --> 01:03:51,680 Speaker 1: my very smart sister too. If you said said to me, hey, 1145 01:03:51,720 --> 01:03:54,640 Speaker 1: I gotta drive several miles to get to you, is 1146 01:03:54,640 --> 01:04:01,520 Speaker 1: that four or five? Yes? Dude? What hey, Lauren, you're 1147 01:04:01,560 --> 01:04:06,439 Speaker 1: on my podcast. I have a quick question. It's nothing personal. Okay, Hey, 1148 01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:08,120 Speaker 1: if I told you that someone went up in a 1149 01:04:08,160 --> 01:04:11,720 Speaker 1: space shuttle and that they floated in space for several minutes, 1150 01:04:12,440 --> 01:04:15,320 Speaker 1: how many minutes approximately do you think that would be? 1151 01:04:16,320 --> 01:04:21,240 Speaker 1: Several minutes? Yes? Um, I don't know, like at least 1152 01:04:22,240 --> 01:04:26,680 Speaker 1: six six minutes. Okay, Okay, thank you for your answer. 1153 01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:28,800 Speaker 1: Is anyone else with you that could answer this question? 1154 01:04:28,840 --> 01:04:34,200 Speaker 1: Any adults? Um? No, there's just a baby. Okay. Well, 1155 01:04:34,440 --> 01:04:36,880 Speaker 1: I just spoke to Poppy and she also said that 1156 01:04:36,960 --> 01:04:44,240 Speaker 1: it was several monsters that were at mom and Dad's. Wait, 1157 01:04:44,360 --> 01:04:47,600 Speaker 1: Andrew wants me to ask something else. If someone said 1158 01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:52,080 Speaker 1: you gotta drive several minutes several miles, how many miles 1159 01:04:52,120 --> 01:04:54,120 Speaker 1: do you think that would be? It's several miles to 1160 01:04:54,200 --> 01:04:57,640 Speaker 1: get to me. Several. I mean it's got to be 1161 01:04:57,720 --> 01:05:04,280 Speaker 1: over five, but under how many? Answer? Um, severn, I 1162 01:05:04,320 --> 01:05:08,080 Speaker 1: would say ten and below five to ten? Think that 1163 01:05:08,240 --> 01:05:11,560 Speaker 1: is what several means? And that is that what you think, 1164 01:05:12,040 --> 01:05:15,400 Speaker 1: of course, because it's what everyone thinks it means. Andrew 1165 01:05:15,560 --> 01:05:17,960 Speaker 1: thinks that if someone floats in space for several minutes, 1166 01:05:18,280 --> 01:05:23,920 Speaker 1: it should be like thousands of minutes. Sever several is not. 1167 01:05:24,160 --> 01:05:26,120 Speaker 1: Then you would just say Andrew thinks several is a 1168 01:05:26,120 --> 01:05:28,680 Speaker 1: lot ton of like a lot yes, or you would 1169 01:05:28,680 --> 01:05:30,680 Speaker 1: say up to an like an hour like then you 1170 01:05:30,680 --> 01:05:33,480 Speaker 1: would just go to hours. Okay, thank you for your input, Lauren, 1171 01:05:33,640 --> 01:05:38,280 Speaker 1: We're gonna keep going all right, by all right, um, 1172 01:05:38,480 --> 01:05:49,480 Speaker 1: let's try my friend cat. Do we google several? Can 1173 01:05:49,520 --> 01:05:54,000 Speaker 1: you google it? No? Yeah, let's google it. Maybe then 1174 01:05:54,040 --> 01:05:57,640 Speaker 1: we could just figure this out because in my mind, oh, here, 1175 01:05:59,000 --> 01:06:02,800 Speaker 1: several more more than two but not many is the definition. 1176 01:06:03,840 --> 01:06:05,640 Speaker 1: Hi on you, you're on my podcast? Can I ask 1177 01:06:05,680 --> 01:06:09,680 Speaker 1: you a quick question? Are you with any other adults 1178 01:06:09,840 --> 01:06:14,120 Speaker 1: right now? Yeah? Okay? Um, independently, I want to ask, 1179 01:06:14,440 --> 01:06:16,240 Speaker 1: will you pose this question to both you and the 1180 01:06:16,400 --> 01:06:19,680 Speaker 1: Are you with Matt? Yeah? Okay? If I told you 1181 01:06:19,720 --> 01:06:22,280 Speaker 1: that a space shuttle took off and was they were 1182 01:06:22,320 --> 01:06:27,680 Speaker 1: in space, and that the astronaut floated several minutes in space? 1183 01:06:28,240 --> 01:06:37,480 Speaker 1: How approximately? How many minutes would several minutes be? Several minutes? Yeah? Approximately? 1184 01:06:37,560 --> 01:06:43,240 Speaker 1: How many minutes is several? Thank you? And Matt would 1185 01:06:43,560 --> 01:06:47,040 Speaker 1: would Matt agree with that or disagree? I always agree 1186 01:06:47,040 --> 01:06:49,680 Speaker 1: with on you? Okay? But if if any weren't there, 1187 01:06:49,680 --> 01:06:54,000 Speaker 1: how many is several? Probably? Okay? Now, if I told 1188 01:06:54,040 --> 01:06:57,080 Speaker 1: you I was several miles away from you, how many 1189 01:06:57,120 --> 01:07:02,080 Speaker 1: miles would that be? Definitely over five and less than ten? 1190 01:07:02,840 --> 01:07:09,120 Speaker 1: Thank you? Finally answer, um, thanks guys, I'll call you later. Um, alright, 1191 01:07:09,160 --> 01:07:11,439 Speaker 1: so I rest my case. Andrew? Are you? Are you done? 1192 01:07:11,520 --> 01:07:19,160 Speaker 1: I gotta wait? Noah? Definition? Can you? I will not 1193 01:07:19,240 --> 01:07:22,880 Speaker 1: use it in a sentence. But the definition is small 1194 01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:27,120 Speaker 1: number for years? A small number more than two, but 1195 01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:33,520 Speaker 1: not many. Why do I in my mind think a 1196 01:07:33,640 --> 01:07:37,160 Speaker 1: several years is a long jail sentence? Well, a several 1197 01:07:37,320 --> 01:07:41,120 Speaker 1: isn't a thing. It's just several several is I don't 1198 01:07:41,120 --> 01:07:44,800 Speaker 1: know what that is, dude. I feel like I'm in 1199 01:07:44,840 --> 01:07:47,840 Speaker 1: a weird matrix right now. I think this is um 1200 01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:51,200 Speaker 1: that what's that thing called the Gelin effect or the 1201 01:07:51,360 --> 01:07:55,800 Speaker 1: Mandela effects. Yeah, where you think the baronste bears, you 1202 01:07:55,840 --> 01:07:59,520 Speaker 1: think it's but it's burnt it's always been burned, or 1203 01:07:59,560 --> 01:08:03,520 Speaker 1: that you. Mr Peanut has a monocle, but he does 1204 01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:09,000 Speaker 1: not have a monocle? Is their word? Really? Whoa? Yeah, Doc, 1205 01:08:09,600 --> 01:08:18,080 Speaker 1: isn't that wild? He never asked, dud dude, he is 1206 01:08:18,120 --> 01:08:20,120 Speaker 1: a peanut, but he has never had a monocle. Look 1207 01:08:20,160 --> 01:08:26,360 Speaker 1: it up. It's wild that several years in jail, Yes, 1208 01:08:26,920 --> 01:08:32,160 Speaker 1: Mandela was that makes it very more several? No, it's 1209 01:08:32,200 --> 01:08:37,720 Speaker 1: several is not thirty? Andrew, Andrew, I'm gonna find so 1210 01:08:37,760 --> 01:08:43,680 Speaker 1: funny Mandela. Alright, let's go to did we get to um? Oh, 1211 01:08:43,760 --> 01:08:45,920 Speaker 1: yeah we did. Why do I care? That's Michael Strahan. 1212 01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:47,720 Speaker 1: I mean I care because you don't know what the 1213 01:08:47,720 --> 01:08:53,559 Speaker 1: definition of several is. Final thought, Let's go through quicktop one, 1214 01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:55,400 Speaker 1: bottom one. Because this is a quick one, We're going 1215 01:08:55,439 --> 01:08:58,759 Speaker 1: to do condiments. Let's start with bottom. Your least favorite condiment. 1216 01:08:59,479 --> 01:09:04,400 Speaker 1: All right, who's going are we doing least favorite first? 1217 01:09:04,920 --> 01:09:13,880 Speaker 1: I'm gonna go ah, this is tough, uh spicy mustard? Whoa, 1218 01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:18,160 Speaker 1: because your asshole? No, but taste? But yes, that too 1219 01:09:18,720 --> 01:09:24,240 Speaker 1: taste okay, like a dijon even like if you an 1220 01:09:24,600 --> 01:09:28,520 Speaker 1: your boys digging in. But oh god, that's a little foreshadowing. 1221 01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:33,839 Speaker 1: But yeah, that's my bottom. That's my bottom. One mayonnaise, mayonnaise, 1222 01:09:33,880 --> 01:09:36,320 Speaker 1: anything with mayonnaise in it, I'm out. Don't like it, 1223 01:09:36,439 --> 01:09:37,960 Speaker 1: don't want to smell it, don't want to touch it, 1224 01:09:38,000 --> 01:09:40,439 Speaker 1: don't want to hear about it. I would rather eat calm. 1225 01:09:40,479 --> 01:09:43,599 Speaker 1: I would rather eat a strange man's calm than mayonnaise. 1226 01:09:43,640 --> 01:09:46,040 Speaker 1: I'm not even joking you. It's this. It's gross. Well 1227 01:09:46,120 --> 01:09:47,959 Speaker 1: that's not true, because I don't want to get diseases. 1228 01:09:48,000 --> 01:10:04,000 Speaker 1: But mayonnaise is foul um? Um does pesto? You don't 1229 01:10:04,040 --> 01:10:09,400 Speaker 1: like pesto? I didn't know we could go intos. Oh, 1230 01:10:09,479 --> 01:10:12,839 Speaker 1: you can go into any anything that you can rub, bread, spread, 1231 01:10:12,920 --> 01:10:15,120 Speaker 1: pesto spread. What's the what about the pesto that you 1232 01:10:15,120 --> 01:10:17,639 Speaker 1: don't like? You don't like pine nuts? Oh, it's it's 1233 01:10:17,640 --> 01:10:19,680 Speaker 1: not the pine nuts, it's whatever the green stuff is 1234 01:10:21,000 --> 01:10:23,680 Speaker 1: like to you're not a fan of green cilantro and 1235 01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:27,240 Speaker 1: I don't think it's cilantro um. So okay, pesto it's 1236 01:10:27,240 --> 01:10:30,800 Speaker 1: like interesting to to Herby, and I like Herbie. But 1237 01:10:31,040 --> 01:10:33,639 Speaker 1: it's too herby. I thought you were gonna say urban 1238 01:10:33,680 --> 01:10:36,920 Speaker 1: and I was like easy, they're um Andrew. Number one 1239 01:10:36,960 --> 01:10:40,120 Speaker 1: condom blow your mine? Wait wait wait wait, I don't 1240 01:10:41,360 --> 01:10:45,080 Speaker 1: know my bottom and spicy mustard, my top, spicy mayonnaise. 1241 01:10:47,400 --> 01:10:55,240 Speaker 1: There's a spicy man. Yeah, Japanese restaurants. Oh that's the ship, 1242 01:10:55,880 --> 01:10:58,840 Speaker 1: but it makes me ship before I leave the Oh 1243 01:10:58,880 --> 01:11:02,120 Speaker 1: that's a sus stomach cup. But god, it's good. Okay, 1244 01:11:02,120 --> 01:11:06,160 Speaker 1: what's that? What did about you? Okay, I'm gonna go. Um. 1245 01:11:06,200 --> 01:11:08,400 Speaker 1: You know, we did salad dressings last, so I can't 1246 01:11:08,479 --> 01:11:10,439 Speaker 1: count salad dressings, but I would go with that characteriner 1247 01:11:10,520 --> 01:11:13,160 Speaker 1: salad dressing. I would dip anything in that. But Catchup 1248 01:11:13,240 --> 01:11:15,559 Speaker 1: is my O is number one. I love Catchup and 1249 01:11:15,560 --> 01:11:17,560 Speaker 1: I love um and I'm just gonna throw one in 1250 01:11:17,600 --> 01:11:21,639 Speaker 1: there for fun. Sweet onion dressing at um at Subway 1251 01:11:21,720 --> 01:11:24,160 Speaker 1: as a condiment to put on your sandwich. It's so 1252 01:11:24,400 --> 01:11:27,800 Speaker 1: fucking good it changes everything. Andrew can co sign on that. 1253 01:11:28,640 --> 01:11:36,000 Speaker 1: I put several fucking pumps off of it on No. 1254 01:11:36,560 --> 01:11:40,519 Speaker 1: Number one condiment. Number one has to be barbecue sauce, 1255 01:11:40,760 --> 01:11:47,280 Speaker 1: and my favorite is Stubs barbecue sauce because it even 1256 01:11:47,320 --> 01:11:53,200 Speaker 1: comes in manly containers, like it's like a boot. I 1257 01:11:53,280 --> 01:11:56,840 Speaker 1: hit my wife before I make it, like, shut up, 1258 01:11:58,320 --> 01:12:02,960 Speaker 1: and I love it. Warmed up, little tip. What's the 1259 01:12:02,960 --> 01:12:06,360 Speaker 1: weirdest thing you put your favorite condiment on that? You've 1260 01:12:06,360 --> 01:12:08,839 Speaker 1: been known to put your favorite condiment on mac and cheese, 1261 01:12:09,560 --> 01:12:14,320 Speaker 1: Mac and cheese. Oh that barbecue on there? Yeah? Smart? Smart? 1262 01:12:14,800 --> 01:12:16,519 Speaker 1: Would you put it on a stuff? Would you put 1263 01:12:16,520 --> 01:12:19,160 Speaker 1: stubbs on a stub and lick it off the stuff? Yes, 1264 01:12:19,320 --> 01:12:23,479 Speaker 1: if it's warmed up, okay, warmed up? That stuff had 1265 01:12:23,520 --> 01:12:27,559 Speaker 1: been plotting something and rubbing its stubs together, going thankful 1266 01:12:27,600 --> 01:12:32,519 Speaker 1: for your hands, Be thankful for your stubs, anything you have. 1267 01:12:32,840 --> 01:12:37,080 Speaker 1: I had a friend in college named Dylan McCracken, and 1268 01:12:37,160 --> 01:12:40,960 Speaker 1: he would put mayonnaise. I'm not lying. He'd put mayonnaise 1269 01:12:41,000 --> 01:12:44,320 Speaker 1: on Checkboy r D in the can. He wouldn't even 1270 01:12:44,400 --> 01:12:46,799 Speaker 1: heat it up. He put the mannaise in the can. 1271 01:12:47,280 --> 01:12:51,920 Speaker 1: Eat the can with the mayonnaise. He he dropped out 1272 01:12:52,520 --> 01:12:56,280 Speaker 1: of college, failed out. I mean, I will put catch 1273 01:12:56,360 --> 01:12:59,519 Speaker 1: up on any fucking thing anything. But you know the 1274 01:12:59,560 --> 01:13:02,160 Speaker 1: weirdest thing I eat with ketchup, Like I I use 1275 01:13:02,240 --> 01:13:05,120 Speaker 1: the sugar free catchup that is um I get it 1276 01:13:05,200 --> 01:13:07,760 Speaker 1: whole foods. I don't know the exact it. I just 1277 01:13:07,800 --> 01:13:16,960 Speaker 1: love it. It's very good, it's very rich. Um my 1278 01:13:17,040 --> 01:13:19,840 Speaker 1: favorite snack I eat and this sometimes I just crave it. 1279 01:13:19,920 --> 01:13:23,599 Speaker 1: I haven't been lately. Seaweed snack. And I've told this before. 1280 01:13:23,920 --> 01:13:26,080 Speaker 1: You take a sewed snack, You take a little piece 1281 01:13:26,080 --> 01:13:29,439 Speaker 1: of just cold fucking tofu firm, you slice it, you 1282 01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:31,479 Speaker 1: make a little slice, you put it in the seawed 1283 01:13:31,479 --> 01:13:33,960 Speaker 1: snack on one half of it. Then you put a 1284 01:13:34,080 --> 01:13:36,200 Speaker 1: dollop of hummus or baby ganooche on top of the 1285 01:13:37,320 --> 01:13:40,479 Speaker 1: um tofu and then you fold over the seawed snack 1286 01:13:40,520 --> 01:13:42,280 Speaker 1: and you dip it and catch up. That is my 1287 01:13:42,600 --> 01:13:49,360 Speaker 1: favorite meal. I'm so weird. We love it. I love ketchup, 1288 01:13:49,400 --> 01:13:52,240 Speaker 1: but I don't like I like a thicker ketchup. I 1289 01:13:52,240 --> 01:13:55,120 Speaker 1: don't like running ketchup, of course. Yeah, I mean it's 1290 01:13:56,280 --> 01:13:58,920 Speaker 1: and that ketchup water. I mean I'd rather drink trash 1291 01:13:59,240 --> 01:14:01,680 Speaker 1: like the water at the b It isn't interesting catch 1292 01:14:01,720 --> 01:14:04,519 Speaker 1: up water. You don't want to bring condiments into the 1293 01:14:04,560 --> 01:14:05,960 Speaker 1: bed like you want to want to put catch up 1294 01:14:06,000 --> 01:14:10,800 Speaker 1: on a penis no no, But you want us to 1295 01:14:10,800 --> 01:14:21,559 Speaker 1: put something Oh yeah, alright, guys, that's the show for today. UM. 1296 01:14:21,680 --> 01:14:23,720 Speaker 1: I hope you got something out of it. I sure did. 1297 01:14:24,040 --> 01:14:27,880 Speaker 1: Um the several thing is blowing my mind. Dude, we 1298 01:14:27,960 --> 01:14:30,880 Speaker 1: did that was final thought? Yeah we did top one 1299 01:14:30,880 --> 01:14:35,559 Speaker 1: about it one final I meant it. But yeah, we'll 1300 01:14:35,600 --> 01:14:37,799 Speaker 1: be back this week. We're gonna be in Los Angeles 1301 01:14:37,800 --> 01:14:39,599 Speaker 1: for this uh this week, so we'll have some good 1302 01:14:39,800 --> 01:14:43,720 Speaker 1: l A stories. Um gon on Wednesday, we'll be off. 1303 01:14:44,560 --> 01:14:48,240 Speaker 1: So we're gonna beat off on Wednesday and be off. UM, 1304 01:14:48,400 --> 01:14:49,760 Speaker 1: I just want to give you a heads up for that. 1305 01:14:49,800 --> 01:14:51,920 Speaker 1: We're taking the day off. Our schedules just do not 1306 01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:54,880 Speaker 1: align to make it work. But we will be here 1307 01:14:54,920 --> 01:14:57,360 Speaker 1: tomorrow and on Thursday, so don't worry about that and 1308 01:14:57,479 --> 01:15:02,200 Speaker 1: don't be cut out there. And ver canton off, I 1309 01:15:02,200 --> 01:15:04,439 Speaker 1: think those are both beats. But we're doing the best 1310 01:15:04,439 --> 01:15:04,720 Speaker 1: we can