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Speaker 1: All right, it's time for B a q A B

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Speaker 1: a q A. I can't believe I'm doing it. I

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Speaker 1: feel embarrassed. Hello a q a Q.

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Speaker 2: I'll back you up.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for that, Thank you for that. We have

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Speaker 1: Delian Vados from sleighing the stock Market and Delian the

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Speaker 1: Money Coach joining us on B, a Q and A

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Speaker 1: this week. Delian, thank you so much for sticking around

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Speaker 1: and taking some questions from our BA fam.

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Speaker 2: Yes, let's hear them all right.

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Speaker 1: And just a reminder, if you guys want to ask

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Speaker 1: us a question, you can go to our ig send

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Speaker 1: us a d M. We're at Brand Ambition Podcast on

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Speaker 1: i G or hit us up on our email Brand

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Speaker 1: Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com. All right, let's get

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Speaker 1: to We have a couple of juicy questions. The first one,

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Speaker 1: I think Delian and I both feel deep in our

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Speaker 1: our our hearts comes from an anonymous listener who says,

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Speaker 1: I really need your help. I can't seem to stop

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Speaker 1: impulse buying. I'm shopping on Amazon multiple times a week.

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Speaker 1: I'm always checking out with PayPal, which has my AMEX

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Speaker 1: linked to it, and my credit card is on food

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Speaker 1: apps like Panera and Starbucks. I feel like I always

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Speaker 1: have access to cash. Every month I'm accumulating like seven

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Speaker 1: hundred to nine hundred dollars in credit card debt and

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Speaker 1: pay it off, only to end up in more debt

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Speaker 1: the next month. I just want to save my money

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Speaker 1: and buy a house or invest. Thank you for reading

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Speaker 1: this and helping me out. Oh man, this was me

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Speaker 1: in the of the pandemic Amazon one click shopping. Are

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Speaker 1: you kidding me? There's a reason I feel like it easy.

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Speaker 1: So what do you have to say to this listener this,

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Speaker 1: dear dear impulse buying.

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Speaker 2: First of all, don't beat yourself up because the marketing

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Speaker 2: machine is very real and it's very powerful. So you

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Speaker 2: are not, like, you know, a failure or there's not

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Speaker 2: something wrong with you because you can't just seem to

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Speaker 2: resist the ads because they are powerful. And I totally

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Speaker 2: get that. I used to do this too when I

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Speaker 2: had insomnia. I had terrible insomnia, and I would wake

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Speaker 2: up in the middle of the night, and just like you,

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Speaker 2: all of my credit cards were saved to my phone,

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Speaker 2: so it was very very easy to shop while I was,

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Speaker 2: you know, unable to sleep, and then packages would arrive

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Speaker 2: in my house and I didn't even remember what I ordered.

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Speaker 2: It was, you know, a problem that was spiraling out

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Speaker 2: of control, and the only way that I was able

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Speaker 2: to solve that is by taking the credit cards off

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Speaker 2: the phone. I had to stop. And also I had

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Speaker 2: to get new card numbers because it was so bad

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Speaker 2: to the point where I had memorized my credit card numbers. Okay,

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Speaker 2: when you know your sixteen digit credit card number, that's

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Speaker 2: how you know you may have a problem. So I

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Speaker 2: had to get new cards, take the numbers off my phone.

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Speaker 2: And then also I had to ask myself what is

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Speaker 2: triggering this? It's just like anything else, like food or

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Speaker 2: anything else that you're like overdoing. What is triggering this?

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Speaker 2: What is the emotion that's happening here? What am I

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Speaker 2: feeling before and after I make these purchases? And you

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Speaker 2: really have to have that moment of truth with yourself

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Speaker 2: and be like, am I trying to fill a void?

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Speaker 2: Am I bored? Am I sad? Is this how I

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Speaker 2: celebrate happiness? Is this how I celebrate anything? And really

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Speaker 2: start understanding what's the underlying emotion that's driving this behavior.

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Speaker 2: Because I can teach you how to make a spreadsheet

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Speaker 2: all day long, I can talk to you about the

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Speaker 2: you know, the opportunity cost of like the money that

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Speaker 2: you're wasting that should be invested in the stock market.

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Speaker 2: I can talk your head off about that all day long,

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Speaker 2: but that's not going to get down to like the

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Speaker 2: emotional trigger that's causing this behavior.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's all about the mindset too, and it's exactly

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Speaker 1: that trigger, and it's about what is your So for me,

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Speaker 1: being an I suffer from impulse control when it comes

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Speaker 1: to eating. I have my whole life, and for me

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Speaker 1: it's about, you know, am I setting myself up to

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Speaker 1: be successful? Or am I setting myself up to make

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Speaker 1: choices that I just beat myself up for later, you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean? And for me, it looks like

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Speaker 1: maybe don't purchase the foods that you know will trigger,

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Speaker 1: or maybe make sure that you're getting good night's sleep

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Speaker 1: so that you're not tired, cranky and upset later and

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Speaker 1: taking care. Have a nap, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: Have a nap so that you're not we talked about

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Speaker 1: naps in last week, But have a nap so you're

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Speaker 1: not so haggard and tired that you you know, you

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Speaker 1: try to cure yourself with like iced coffee with tons

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Speaker 1: of sugar in it. I love your tip to remove

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Speaker 1: your credit cards. And I want to address the part

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Speaker 1: of this question where they're asking about, you know, I

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Speaker 1: just want to save my money and buy a house

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Speaker 1: or invest So here's my trick for that. I don't look.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't I personally, because I struggle with this too.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't focus so much on the things that you're

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Speaker 1: buying that are taking you away from those goals. What I

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Speaker 1: think you should do is treat your investing and your

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Speaker 1: saving almost like a credit card bill. So make it

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Speaker 1: a bill that you pay to yourself and automate that

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Speaker 1: ish Like that is the way that I have, you know,

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Speaker 1: gotten to where I have financially by by not worrying

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Speaker 1: so much about how much I'm spending on groceries each

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Speaker 1: month or eating out on you know, door Dash or

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Speaker 1: Uber eats or whatever. But how just making sure that

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Speaker 1: I automatically I'm saving and investing each month, so that

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Speaker 1: even if I have a slip up, a slip up

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Speaker 1: quote unquote here and there, I can still rest easy

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Speaker 1: knowing I'm still in the market, like I'm still investing

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Speaker 1: automatically because I know myself enough to know if I

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Speaker 1: have to manually do it, I may not make the

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Speaker 1: wisest choice if it comes between me or you know,

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Speaker 1: that special the new wardrobe that I'm looking for, the

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Speaker 1: new gadget or whatnot. So can you get to a

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Speaker 1: place where you have paid off your credit card debt? Okay,

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Speaker 1: keep it, delete your credit cards from Amazon and all

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Speaker 1: these apps, keep it, you know, get all your plastic off,

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Speaker 1: like Delian has said, and then let a month go

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Speaker 1: by where you actually don't have credit cards, and then

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Speaker 1: set up some automatic payments and start paying yourself automatically,

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Speaker 1: and maybe with the knowledge that the money ain't going

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Speaker 1: to be there for your credit card, that will help

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Speaker 1: you think twice before you actually, you know, make those

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Speaker 1: impulse purchases.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I want people to think about credit cards. It's

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Speaker 2: not anything evil. First of all, it's there's no morality

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Speaker 2: tied to credit cards. It's a tool, just like Yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's just a tool, just like anything else. But it's

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Speaker 2: also a privilege to be able to use a credit card.

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Speaker 2: And if you're abusing the privilege, then let's take it

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Speaker 2: away for a minute, let's reassess the system, and then

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Speaker 2: we can always reintroduce credit cards down the line. It

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Speaker 2: doesn't mean that you can never ever use a credit

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Speaker 2: card again. I'm a huge fan of using credit cards,

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Speaker 2: but I also pay it off one hundred percent and

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Speaker 2: I don't let my credit cards derail me from my

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Speaker 2: other goals.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Absolutely, And also, are you guilty I have? I

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Speaker 1: don't know if I shouldn't say guilty, but I am.

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Speaker 1: I am. I like to when I was a kid,

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Speaker 1: we would go window shopping, like literally, we'd just like

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Speaker 1: go to some major you know, downtown Atlanta or whatever,

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Speaker 1: to the mall and just look in stores, try things on,

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Speaker 1: not buy anything. And for me, I still get kind

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Speaker 1: of like the endorphin release when I go on to

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Speaker 1: you know, when my favorite brand's websites and just fill

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Speaker 1: up a cart. I fill up a cart and I'm like, wow,

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Speaker 1: that's two thousand dollars. I'll come back to it. If

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Speaker 1: I really want it, I'll come back to it. I

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Speaker 1: have so many abandoned online shopping carts, and that's that's

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Speaker 1: as far as I let it go. Late night when

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Speaker 1: I wake up at like two and Instagram serves me

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Speaker 1: an ad for some like sleep, some loungewear that I've

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Speaker 1: been wanting to try. Damn those ads, so you said it.

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Speaker 1: The marketing. They are so powerful, They're so good and terrible.

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Speaker 1: But that's what I like to do. I put like

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Speaker 1: a seventy two hour time on it. If I put

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Speaker 1: it in my cart, and in seventy two hours, I

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Speaker 1: still care and I go back to it. Most of

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Speaker 1: the time I forget. I can't even tell you what

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Speaker 1: I was shopping on at two am this year, I

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Speaker 1: would say twenty four hours.

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Speaker 2: Honestly, yeah, your hours, you're going to completely forget.

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Speaker 1: It exactly, and that I think I need it, And

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Speaker 1: that has helped me a lot to just not just

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Speaker 1: put it in your cart and come back to it later.

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Speaker 1: But I love you for asking this question, for admitting it,

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Speaker 1: because I know, I know for a fact you are

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Speaker 1: not alone at all. Okay, thank you for your question.

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Speaker 1: Let's go to number two, And just as a reminder,

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Speaker 1: me and Delianne, we're your financial girlfriends today. We are

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Speaker 1: not your financial advisors or financial advisors in general. So

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Speaker 1: take what we're saying with a huge handful of salt,

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Speaker 1: as I like to say, not just a grain, a

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Speaker 1: hole handful, and just know that it's hard for us

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Speaker 1: to give specific advice because we don't know every little

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Speaker 1: detail about you. So with that caveat, and as Delian says, like,

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Speaker 1: don't sue us, or if you do, direct those to Delian,

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Speaker 1: she's the attorneyer like not me, not me, all right?

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Speaker 1: Number two This is from a listener named Laura, who says,

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Speaker 1: I've worked in nonprofits for years and recently started a

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Speaker 1: government job with the pension. I opted into the full

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Speaker 1: pension plan, and I have plans to stay in government

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Speaker 1: work until I retire at fifty five, which is in

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Speaker 1: twenty seven years, assuming the world doesn't catch fire by then.

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Speaker 1: I mean, isn't it literally catching fire right now? Though

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Speaker 1: I should have about seventy to one hundred K a

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Speaker 1: year from my pension, I'm currently contributing fifty dollars a

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Speaker 1: month to hoard my wroth IRA, but I plan to

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Speaker 1: start maxing it out for twenty twenty two and beyond.

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Speaker 1: I also plan to contribute to my deferred compensation plan

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Speaker 1: in twenty twenty two, which is like my government's four

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Speaker 1: to one K. I should be out of credit card

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Speaker 1: debt by December twenty twenty one, thank god, and have

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Speaker 1: my car set to be paid off by twenty twenty three.

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Speaker 1: My question is am I doing too much with the

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Speaker 1: retirement money? I want to lean into enjoying my money now,

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Speaker 1: but I want to be mindful about my future as well.

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Speaker 1: I would love your thoughts. So this was a beefy one.

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Speaker 1: Let me back up and reread a couple things. So

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Speaker 1: what she's asking is, she's got fifty dollars a month

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Speaker 1: going into a wroth. She's gonna start maxing that out.

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Speaker 1: She's also putting money into her four oh one k

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Speaker 1: through her government job. She's going to pay off for

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Speaker 1: credit card debt and have her car paid off by

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Speaker 1: bite in two years from now.

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Speaker 2: But is she a pension?

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Speaker 1: She's a pension coming her way? Is she over saving

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Speaker 1: for retirement? Is there such a thing? Delianne? Like, what

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Speaker 1: do you think there.

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Speaker 2: Is such a thing. I'm not gonna say there isn't

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Speaker 2: such a thing. But I when people ask this question,

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Speaker 2: it usually means that they don't have a goal in mind.

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Speaker 2: Am I doing too much? Am I doing enough? If

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Speaker 2: you don't know if you're on track, that means that

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Speaker 2: you don't you haven't decided what the track is, like,

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Speaker 2: where are you heading? And so This is where people

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Speaker 2: tend to spend more money than they should because they

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Speaker 2: don't have any direction for where their money should be going. Right,

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Speaker 2: So if you think you're investing enough, they're like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I can spend more. But if you're not investing enough,

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Speaker 2: then you're going to fall short at the end. Now,

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Speaker 2: I understand this person has a pension, which is a

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Speaker 2: unique situation. Not most people don't have access to a pension.

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Speaker 2: So should you still be investing, you know, quote unquote

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Speaker 2: aggressively and if you have a pension, yes, because like you,

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Speaker 2: she said, she's twenty seven years away from collecting on

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Speaker 2: that pension. A lot can change in twenty seven years, right,

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Speaker 2: you could change jobs, the pension. Something could happen. Pensions

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Speaker 2: are not one hundred percent guaranteed. I know a lot

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Speaker 2: of people think they are, but some of them sometimes

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Speaker 2: are mismanaged and you don't get the payout that you

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Speaker 2: thought you were going to get, So you cannot count

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Speaker 2: on it a thousand hundred percent. You know, you have

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Speaker 2: to have a backup plan. So I'm happy to hear

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Speaker 2: that you're investing in other vehicles as well. And also,

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Speaker 2: what if you decide that you want to retire early, right,

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Speaker 2: then the pension is not going to be an option

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Speaker 2: for you because you have to stay. So I'm glad

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Speaker 2: to hear that you're investing in these other accounts. Like

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Speaker 2: I said, if you don't know if you're investing enough,

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Speaker 2: then it means that you don't know what your financial

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Speaker 2: independence number is. So that's the first thing you need

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Speaker 2: to do. The formula for financial independence is your annual

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Speaker 2: expenses times twenty five. That is a guideline. It is

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Speaker 2: not like live and die by it, but is a

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Speaker 2: guideline for you to start. It's like a back of

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Speaker 2: the napkin type of number. But start with that number

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Speaker 2: and then work your way backwards. Okay, well, let's say

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Speaker 2: you know it was your annual expenses are forty thousand

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Speaker 2: dollars a year. Forty times twenty five is going to

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Speaker 2: be a million, So you need a million dollars invested.

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Speaker 2: Now you want to work backwards, well, how much I

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Speaker 2: need to invest per month to reach a million dollars

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Speaker 2: by x age? Because it's also about how fast you

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Speaker 2: want to hit that number. Some people don't care. They're like, oh,

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Speaker 2: I can wait twenty twenty five years to get to it,

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Speaker 2: and some people are like, no, I want to hit

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Speaker 2: it in like ten years. Obviously those are gonna that's

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Speaker 2: gonna look very different, right, depending on what you want.

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Speaker 2: So I would say, find out what your financial independence

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Speaker 2: number is, work your way backwards, and then you'll have

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Speaker 2: a better sense of you know, how fast do I

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Speaker 2: need to be moving here with my investing? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I think that's really wise. And I have also found

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Speaker 1: myself in the exact position you're in, Laura, and I've

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Speaker 1: got about a decade on you. So don't feel bad

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Speaker 1: at all. You're about if I'm doing my own math.

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Speaker 1: She says she's going to retire at fifty five, which

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Speaker 1: is in twenty seven years. So she's in her early

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Speaker 1: twenty wait, early thirty.

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Speaker 2: I think she's like my age.

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Speaker 1: She's like, yeah, yeah, forty five.

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Speaker 2: No, she's thirty five, she's like thirties, early thirties.

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Speaker 1: We're both so bad at I know this.

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Speaker 2: Is why I went to law school.

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Speaker 1: No, she's twenty eight. She's twenty Eight's.

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Speaker 2: Exactly when I started at twenty eight.

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Speaker 1: Yeah you so you yeah, amazing. Now listen, here's my thought.

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Speaker 1: It is now that we've got the really difficult question,

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Speaker 1: how old are you out of the way. My thing is,

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Speaker 1: it sounds like you're like you're not enjoying your money,

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Speaker 1: or maybe you don't have enough left over after all

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Speaker 1: these goals are met to feel like you're enjoying it.

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Speaker 1: So I would always carve out some of your budget.

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Speaker 1: And it sounds like you're doing really well financially. You're

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Speaker 1: going to pay off your car, and you have some

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Speaker 1: credit card debt, You're going to pay that off. You know,

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Speaker 1: how are you spending money on things that you enjoy

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Speaker 1: and pouring into yourself and do it really mindfully? You

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Speaker 1: can't do all the things because you still have your

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Speaker 1: goals in mind, right, But is there one thing a

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Speaker 1: month or a week that will bring you joy that

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Speaker 1: makes you feel like I am enjoying the fruits of

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Speaker 1: my labor now because yo, lo, like you only live once, right.

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Speaker 1: My next thing is, you're only twenty eight, and I

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Speaker 1: like to be really aggressive younger. You have time on

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Speaker 1: your side now if you just double down and remember that,

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Speaker 1: like like you, I don't know anything else, like do

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Speaker 1: you have a family, you have kids? You know, your

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Speaker 1: relationship whatever, what your future is going to be like?

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Speaker 1: But I was never it's so much easier when you

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Speaker 1: can only think about yourself. I cannot tell you, Like,

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Speaker 1: delian look how look at the glow she has, look

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Speaker 1: at that she got a dog. You're single, you know,

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Speaker 1: just like it's a it's a choice, Delianne, that you

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Speaker 1: made and I did not, and you know say I

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Speaker 1: regret it, but like you know what I mean, like

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Speaker 1: you look really well rested, like but listen, like there

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Speaker 1: is oh and who's calling me?

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Speaker 2: Now?

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Speaker 1: It's my speaking of my husband? No, but when you

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Speaker 1: were just making decisions for yourself, it is that is

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Speaker 1: the time. I feel like you really want to double

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Speaker 1: down and be excited to be able to pour so

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Speaker 1: much money into your into your investments, and you're doing

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Speaker 1: so many amazing things and you're so far ahead. I

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Speaker 1: feel like of a lot of people your age that

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Speaker 1: why not you know, capitalize on this on this time now? Wow?

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Speaker 1: And who knows? I know you seem pretty dead set

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Speaker 1: on working for the government and another twenty seven years,

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Speaker 1: But that's a long time, Laura. You don't know what

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Speaker 1: could happen. Maybe if you start investing now, you may

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Speaker 1: not have to go the full like forget the pension.

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Speaker 1: Can I say that? Like, maybe you could make more

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Speaker 1: than the pension happening to my husband right now because

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Speaker 1: he works for the government and he loves to say

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Speaker 1: he has a pension, And I'm like, maybe you could

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Speaker 1: quit and then you would have even more than a pension.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, that's for our financial therapist, a couple therapists

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Speaker 1: to work through. But I would just say that, you know,

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Speaker 1: I think when you're young, in your twenties, you know,

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Speaker 1: living for yourself and only yourself, that is when you

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Speaker 1: really would double down. So I think you're doing, you know,

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Speaker 1: totally the right thing, but just you know, whatever, find

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Speaker 1: the thing that you value that brings you joy and

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Speaker 1: invest in that and consider that investment in your own

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Speaker 1: mental health and your happiness because that matters too.

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Speaker 2: One hundred percent. I mean, I think investing is about

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Speaker 2: extending a life that you already love so much, building

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Speaker 2: the life that you love, And the whole point of

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Speaker 2: investing is like, I want to maintain this lifestyle for

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Speaker 2: as long as possible. That's what people don't realize. They're like, oh,

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Speaker 2: why do I want to save and invest so that

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Speaker 2: I can enjoy my life when I'm sixtied? No, no, no,

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Speaker 2: you're thinking about it the wrong way. It's build the

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Speaker 2: life that you love right now today, and then you

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Speaker 2: want to continue that so you don't have to downgrade

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Speaker 2: when you hit your sixties and seventies, right, That is

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Speaker 2: not a cute look to have to budget and cut

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Speaker 2: coupons when you're that old, when you're really going to

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Speaker 2: need all the comforts in life. Right, Like in your

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Speaker 2: twenties and your thirties, you can rough some things, but

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Speaker 2: when you're in your sixties, you don't want to be

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Speaker 2: roughing it in your sixties and seventies. That is not cute.

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Speaker 1: You want the most expensive mattress, they say, yes, you

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Speaker 1: want the most comfiest shoes, Like you want first class

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Speaker 1: baby on the flight they tell you. I'm like, what

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Speaker 1: are the you've mentioned on If you haven't listened to

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Speaker 1: Wednesday show where I talked to Delian more in depth

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Speaker 1: about her story. I think on that show you talk

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Speaker 1: about how you you know, you do spend time on

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Speaker 1: yourself and doing things that you love, like traveling, But

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Speaker 1: what are some things that you know really bring you

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Speaker 1: joy that you say that you know have the most

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Speaker 1: value for you. As far as when you're gonna spend

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Speaker 1: money on yourself, what is that going toward.

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Speaker 2: Oh I love, I love you know. My love language

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Speaker 2: is like quality time, so anything having to do with

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Speaker 2: like live events, making new memories in person. So obviously

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Speaker 2: traveling is part of that. But I love listening to music, live,

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Speaker 2: comedy shows live. When I lived in New York City,

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Speaker 2: I was going to a Broadway show like at least

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Speaker 2: once a month. So I like to take advantage of

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Speaker 2: the activities in my I am a tourist in my

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Speaker 2: own city, right, so I will do like the dorky

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Speaker 2: little sailboat tours like around the Harbor. I will do

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Speaker 2: all those things, you know, because I've I like to

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Speaker 2: enjoy my city as a tourist. Would I'm like, I

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Speaker 2: pay a lot of money to live here. I want

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Speaker 2: to I want to enjoy it. So that and then

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Speaker 2: on a smaller scale, is I love leggings. I'm sorry,

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Speaker 2: I do.

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Speaker 1: I love mentioned that as if it was an entire

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Speaker 1: category earlier. Bringing that up again, You're like, I buy leggings.

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Speaker 2: It's a whole thing. It is something that is just

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Speaker 2: dear to my heart. I used to have a fitness

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Speaker 2: account on Instagram, so I used to be a spinning instructor.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if you knew that, but.

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Speaker 1: So wow, Okay, that's peloton. Yes, all right, so you

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Speaker 1: should get on me for how my peloton right now

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Speaker 1: if you can just see it it is.

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Speaker 2: It is called dust.

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Speaker 1: It's home to my moon pod, which is my We

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Speaker 1: had no wedding because of Hurricane Ida Delian. I don't

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Speaker 1: know what to tell you, Okay, that's why. Then, okay,

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Speaker 1: I had to save her, so she was she had

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Speaker 1: to reach higher ground.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: I go on a lot of walks in the summer.

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Speaker 1: I don't peloton as much in the basement because I

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Speaker 1: just want to be outdoors. But let me give me

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Speaker 1: a month. When it gets really you know how New

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Speaker 1: York is, when it gets like nasty, then I very

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Speaker 1: on the peloton.

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Speaker 2: Yes, it's almost embarrassing that I have one in San

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Speaker 2: Diego because it's so stunning here to be outside. But

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Speaker 2: I love having it right here in my house.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, all right, Well, thank you Laura for your question,

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Speaker 1: and listen, I think you have You're on such a

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Speaker 1: good right track. I think you maybe just needed us

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Speaker 1: to tell you how fabulous you are and to treat

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Speaker 1: yourself once again, and.

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Speaker 2: We're happy to do that.

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Speaker 1: That's so happy, Thank y'all for your questions. Again, hit

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Speaker 1: us up Brand Ambition Podcast on ig or Brand Ambition

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Speaker 1: Podcast at gmail dot com. And once again go check

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Speaker 1: out our girl, Delian Delian the Money Coach on ig

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Speaker 1: I Believe. Check the show notes for all of her

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Speaker 1: social handles and you find out how you can enroll

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Speaker 1: in her Sley the stock Market Course. And thank you

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Speaker 1: again Delian for joining us.

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Speaker 2: Thank you so much, this was so fun.