Speaker 1: Something that's peaceful is more still than it is moving.
Speaker 1: Have you ever seen a sunset or sunrise? It's moving,
Speaker 1: but it feels still. That's peace. Peace doesn't mean things
Speaker 1: are not moving, They're just moving at a natural pace.
Speaker 1: That's where we get peace. If we're not looking at
Speaker 1: connecting with peaceful things in nature, peaceful things in our life,
Speaker 1: how can we expect to experience peace? Hey everyone, welcome
Speaker 1: back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast in
Speaker 1: the world. Thanks to each and every single one of
Speaker 1: you that come back every week to listen, learn and grow.
Speaker 1: Now today's episode it's all about the eight ways to
Speaker 1: create more peace and balance in your life. Who doesn't
Speaker 1: want more peace? Who doesn't want more balance? I'm sure
Speaker 1: that when I ask those questions, every single one of
Speaker 1: you would raise your hands saying I want more peace
Speaker 1: in my life. I want more balance in my life.
Speaker 1: Most of us have a life that's full of drama, chaos, pain, stress, imbalance, overwhelm, anxiety.
Speaker 1: How many times have you just looked in the mirror
Speaker 1: and thought it to yourself, I just want some peace,
Speaker 1: I just want some balance. If you've ever felt this way,
Speaker 1: this episode is for you. Now. I was reading a
Speaker 1: study from the Vision of Humanity dot org, and they
Speaker 1: said that since two thousand and eight, the level of
Speaker 1: global peacefulness has deteriorated by two percent, with seventy five
Speaker 1: countries recording a deterioration while eighty six improved. The average
Speaker 1: level of global peacefulness has deteriorated for nine of the
Speaker 1: thirteen past years. The gap between the least and most
Speaker 1: peaceful countries continues to grow. Since two thousand and eight,
Speaker 1: the twenty five peaceful countries declined on ridge by twelve
Speaker 1: point one percent, while the twenty five most peaceful countries
Speaker 1: improved by four point three percent. And of course this
Speaker 1: is relating to conflict, world events, civil unrest, you know,
Speaker 1: looking at global peace on a really macro level. And
Speaker 1: one in seven people globally cite crime, violence, or terrorism
Speaker 1: as the greatest risk to their safety in their daily lives.
Speaker 1: Only road accidents are cited as a bigger risk. Now,
Speaker 1: how many of you would like to know what the
Speaker 1: twenty twenty one Global Peace Index ranks as the most
Speaker 1: peaceful countries? You might be surprised. So before I tell
Speaker 1: you the top five, let me tell you where certain
Speaker 1: countries are. So this list has ranks around one hundred
Speaker 1: and sixty three countries. The United Kingdom, which is the
Speaker 1: country I was born and raised in, is thirty third
Speaker 1: on the list. The United States of America, where I
Speaker 1: currently live, is one hundred and twenty two on the list.
Speaker 1: On this list, Afghanistan, Yemen, and Syria come in as
Speaker 1: the bottom three, and the top three are Iceland, New
Speaker 1: Zealand and Denmark. Now, of course, this study, which I
Speaker 1: highly recommend you take a look at, goes far deeper
Speaker 1: when it comes to economic, civil, societal impact. But today
Speaker 1: I want to dive in about your peace and balance,
Speaker 1: your personal piece and balance. And the reason why this
Speaker 1: is so important is because no matter what's happening around us,
Speaker 1: what's happening inside of us is so much more important.
Speaker 1: And this is wisdom that has been told and shared
Speaker 1: and tested. Now you may say, well, Jay, I feel
Speaker 1: bad trying to feel peaceful inside when there's so much
Speaker 1: pain outside. But the truth is that the pain outside
Speaker 1: is because of a result of the pain inside. The
Speaker 1: lack of peace on the inside is what creates the
Speaker 1: lack of peace on the outside. I'll give you an example.
Speaker 1: Do you argue with people more when you're peaceful or
Speaker 1: not peaceful. Do you create challenges when you're peaceful or
Speaker 1: when you're under pressure? Do you cause problems and conflict
Speaker 1: when you experience pain or when you don't feel pain. So,
Speaker 1: if we really extend that idea, we have to recognize
Speaker 1: that all the pain, the pressure, the lack of peace
Speaker 1: that exists within the world comes from the idea that
Speaker 1: it is a lack of peace, a great sense of
Speaker 1: exposure to pressure, and so much pain that we experience within.
Speaker 1: And so with that in mind, I would like to
Speaker 1: encourage each and every one of us to listen to
Speaker 1: this episode for the betterment of ourselves, and for the
Speaker 1: betterment of our families and friends, and for the betterment
Speaker 1: of everyone else that we come across. So the first one,
Speaker 1: the first way to create more peace and balance in
Speaker 1: your life. Number one is don't obsess over peace and balance.
Speaker 1: One of the biggest reasons why we don't experience peace
Speaker 1: and balance in our life is because we so desperately
Speaker 1: crave it. When you so desperately crave something, you notice
Speaker 1: the lack of it even more. Right if I think
Speaker 1: to myself right now, I wish I had cereal, but
Speaker 1: I know I don't have cyril in the house right,
Speaker 1: I wish I had Cyril. I wish I had cyril,
Speaker 1: and I obsess over cereal. It makes me really sad.
Speaker 1: It makes me lose peace and makes me lose balance.
Speaker 1: Whereas if I accept that, hey, I don't have Cyril
Speaker 1: in the house right now, but I can drive ten
Speaker 1: minutes to the grocery store to pick some up right
Speaker 1: or I can do an Amazon order and wait for
Speaker 1: it to arrive, Then I can have that Cyril if
Speaker 1: I really want to, or do I even really need cereal?
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm happier with what I have. When we obsess
Speaker 1: over peace and balance, they run further and further away
Speaker 1: from us because we're so aware of the lack of it,
Speaker 1: Whereas when we don't obsess over it, but we've realized
Speaker 1: that we're always just trying to move closer see our challenges,
Speaker 1: that we don't want to move closer. We just never
Speaker 1: want to move. We want to be in peace and
Speaker 1: balance forever always. But the truth is that it requires
Speaker 1: so much more about little steps in the right direction,
Speaker 1: small baby steps, moving a little closer to piece and
Speaker 1: balance every day. And if we move a little further,
Speaker 1: or we move a little closer again. And when we've
Speaker 1: realized that piece and balance don't actually exist, they're just ideas,
Speaker 1: and all that we have to do is move closer
Speaker 1: to our idea of peace and balance, then we feel
Speaker 1: closer to it than ever. So stop obsessing. Stop putting
Speaker 1: peace and balance on such a pedestal that all you
Speaker 1: keep saying is I wish i'd pay peace, I wish
Speaker 1: I had balance, I need peace, I need balance. But
Speaker 1: all that keeps happening is that you just notice that
Speaker 1: you don't have it. You just notice that you don't
Speaker 1: have it in the way that you want it. And
Speaker 1: that's the other challenge. We obsess about peace and balance
Speaker 1: in this very stereotypical, simplistic way, in a very binary way,
Speaker 1: that if we have stress, then we can't have peace.
Speaker 1: We think that they are polar opposites, that they are
Speaker 1: on either end of the spectrum. Well, let's then try
Speaker 1: and move closer on the spectrum. Don't obsess over peace
Speaker 1: and balance. Focus on moving one step closer to the
Speaker 1: person you want to be, to the place you want
Speaker 1: to be, to where you want to go. Okay, step
Speaker 1: number two is a big one. This statement was said
Speaker 1: by Gandhi and it has made an impact in my life.
Speaker 1: He said, when what we think, what we say, and
Speaker 1: what we do is aligned, then we expire arians peace
Speaker 1: and harmony or balance. Let me say that again, when
Speaker 1: what we think, what we say, and what we do
Speaker 1: is aligned. Now, let me ask you a very honest question.
Speaker 1: How many of you think something but say something completely different?
Speaker 1: How many times if you have experienced that you're thinking
Speaker 1: something in your head but you don't say that, what
Speaker 1: does that cause? Cause it's a lack of peace because
Speaker 1: you're thinking something but you don't say it, and you're thinking,
Speaker 1: oh gosh, I wish I said it. I should have
Speaker 1: said it. They deserve it, they need to know. Now
Speaker 1: you've created a lack of peace. Now I'm not saying
Speaker 1: you should say how you think it, but you still
Speaker 1: need to communicate what you're thinking. Right, we think that
Speaker 1: we don't say what we think because it may hurt somebody,
Speaker 1: may upset someone, and that will also lose us peace.
Speaker 1: So if you keep quiet and don't say what you want,
Speaker 1: or if you say exactly what you're thinking, both of
Speaker 1: those push peace away. Therefore, peace is when you think
Speaker 1: something and you say it in a way that can
Speaker 1: be digested. That is peaceful for you and peaceful for
Speaker 1: someone else, because when you can digest it and they
Speaker 1: can digest it, it it creates peace. We don't have peace
Speaker 1: when we have indigestion. And indigestion exists when what we
Speaker 1: think and what we say is different. Now, how many
Speaker 1: of us say something but we do something completely different.
Speaker 1: We say we're going to do it, but we do
Speaker 1: something totally different. That creates dysfunction, that creates a lack
Speaker 1: of peace and balance. So what I want you to
Speaker 1: start doing is thinking about ways that you can say
Speaker 1: and do and think in an aligned way. Right, don't
Speaker 1: say anything that you don't want to do, and don't
Speaker 1: think anything and not put it into words in an
Speaker 1: effective way. Start asking yourself all the time, is what
Speaker 1: I'm doing aligned with how I'm thinking and how I'm speaking?
Speaker 1: And also, am I doing it in a way that
Speaker 1: creates peace? Are my words used to create peace? Is
Speaker 1: the language I use creating peace? Is what I'm thinking
Speaker 1: creating peace for myself? If my thoughts don't create peace
Speaker 1: for myself, how will they create peace anywhere else? Start
Speaker 1: by focusing on creating peace through your thoughts? How do
Speaker 1: you create peace through your thoughts? By wanting that, by
Speaker 1: believing that that is so much more important than any
Speaker 1: other thought you could have. I know that for myself,
Speaker 1: I am constantly seeking more and more thoughts that I
Speaker 1: know bring me peace, that I know are going to
Speaker 1: give me peace because I want to live in a
Speaker 1: peaceful place. That is more important to me than criticizing someone,
Speaker 1: than thinking someone's wrong, than putting someone down, because I
Speaker 1: know none of that creates peace in my life. The
Speaker 1: third step is we need to start our days with
Speaker 1: peace because chances are there will be guaranteed pressure. It
Speaker 1: is natural for our lives to be full of pressure,
Speaker 1: and therefore it is so important for our day to
Speaker 1: begin with peace. It is so important for our day
Speaker 1: to begin with peace. What is the habit that will
Speaker 1: bring you peace? For me? Often it's saying a prayer.
Speaker 1: For me, it's reading a beautiful quote or a thought
Speaker 1: or an idea that brings me peace. For me, peace
Speaker 1: is looking at my favorite piece of artwork that gives
Speaker 1: me peace. For me, peace is practicing breathwork. What are
Speaker 1: you doing every day for peace? Piece is a muscle
Speaker 1: that we have to build. It's something we have to practice.
Speaker 1: It's something that we can do day after day after day.
Speaker 1: That strengthens our ability to find peace even in chaos.
Speaker 1: Look for that piece. Step number four is something that
Speaker 1: is actually very underrated. When you do something good for
Speaker 1: yourself even when it feels bad, that creates peace. When
Speaker 1: I eat healthy, I don't feel great in the moment,
Speaker 1: but it creates peace. My body reacts better, my mind
Speaker 1: reacts better. I sleep better, I work better, I focus better.
Speaker 1: But it feels bad for me in the moment, but
Speaker 1: it's actually good for me. Right. Let me give you
Speaker 1: another example. The other day, I woke up I really
Speaker 1: did not want to work out. I even texted Rather
Speaker 1: and I said, Hey, I'm feeling tired. Should I work out?
Speaker 1: What do you think? And rather being Rather, she said,
Speaker 1: you should definitely work out. You'll probably feel better. I
Speaker 1: was feeling sluggish, I was feeling lazy, and I pushed
Speaker 1: myself and guess what, I felt much better. Guess what
Speaker 1: else happened this weekend. I was avoiding doing my cold plunge.
Speaker 1: I was avoiding doing my infrared sauna, my sensory deprivation tank.
Speaker 1: This is my Saturday morning routine, and I was thinking
Speaker 1: about avoiding it. I talked to myself I don't need
Speaker 1: to do it this week. I'm tired about a long weekend.
Speaker 1: Let me just relax and guess what. I pushed myself
Speaker 1: to go and I felt so much better. Now what
Speaker 1: am I learning there? I'm learning that doing what is
Speaker 1: good for me, even if it feels bad in the moment,
Speaker 1: creates peace. Why because our mind is trying to choose pleasure.
Speaker 1: But really we keep saying we want peace, But what
Speaker 1: we're doing is we're creating a life of pleasure. By saying, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm going to sit in bed, that's not peace, that's pleasure.
Speaker 1: By saying I'm not going to work out, that's not peace,
Speaker 1: that's pleasure. I'm looking for pleasure. But then in my head,
Speaker 1: I'm going, well, why don't I feel peace? Why don't
Speaker 1: I feel calm? Why don't I feel stillness? Because I'm
Speaker 1: prioritizing pleasure. When you do something that's bad for you
Speaker 1: because it feels good in the moment, that's pleasure. When
Speaker 1: you do something that is good for you but it
Speaker 1: feels bad in the moment, that's peace. Right. Notice how
Speaker 1: different they are. The formula for pleasure is do what
Speaker 1: feels good in the moment but bad for you. And
Speaker 1: the equation for peace is do what is good for you,
Speaker 1: even if it feels bad in the moment. Take a
Speaker 1: look at that next time. Are you creating peace or pleasure? Now?
Speaker 1: Pleasure is temporary, it's short lived, it's ephemeral, it does
Speaker 1: not last. Peace is everlasting because it's actually transforming the
Speaker 1: way you live, the way your body works, the way
Speaker 1: your mind is. This is a huge one. I hope
Speaker 1: you practice this now. The fifth one is actually very simple.
Speaker 1: If you want to create more peace and balance in
Speaker 1: your life, tell the truth. Always, Tell the truth always,
Speaker 1: if you not lie. But if you don't tell the truth,
Speaker 1: you create a lack of peace because now you have
Speaker 1: to remember what you said last time. You have to
Speaker 1: now remember how you felt before. If you don't say
Speaker 1: the truth, then and if someone finds out, then they say, well,
Speaker 1: why didn't you tell me the truth. If you don't
Speaker 1: tell the truth and you say something else, then you
Speaker 1: end up regretting it because you're carrying around that lie. Right.
Speaker 1: The truth is always better, and it's harder. It's hard
Speaker 1: to live by the truth. It's more difficult and challenging
Speaker 1: to live by the truth. Because we want to people please,
Speaker 1: We don't want to let anyone down. We don't want
Speaker 1: anyone to judge us. We don't want to be perceived
Speaker 1: in a certain way. But the point is when you
Speaker 1: act in a certain way because you don't want to
Speaker 1: be perceived in a certain way. Now you're worrying when
Speaker 1: will that person figure out what's really the truth? When
Speaker 1: you don't tell the truth, you'll always be concerned and
Speaker 1: worried about when will people discover it. I remember watching
Speaker 1: suits during the pandemic and Mike Ross, if you've ever
Speaker 1: watched suits, I'm going to ruin it for you. Spoiler.
Speaker 1: He pretends that he's going to Harvard Law, and so
Speaker 1: for him, even though he's a phenomenal lawyer, he's so talented,
Speaker 1: he's always always, always worried about what if he gets caught?
Speaker 1: Right now, you may not be lying about going to
Speaker 1: Harvard Law, or you may not be lying. He maybe
Speaker 1: a cover up, He maybe a white light. But then
Speaker 1: you're always guessing, guessing against yourself, and that creates internal
Speaker 1: lack of peace and imbalance. Number six is create an
Speaker 1: environment of peace through sites, sense and sounds. What you
Speaker 1: see can create peace. How often do you look at nature?
Speaker 1: Check this out? Spending at least one hundred and twenty
Speaker 1: minutes a week in nature is associated with good health
Speaker 1: and wellbeing. Now, I'm going to break that down for you,
Speaker 1: just to make it simple. Hundred and twenty right, divided
Speaker 1: by seven. That seventeen minutes a day. Seventeen minutes a day.
Speaker 1: That's all it takes. And the research study goes on
Speaker 1: to say, spending time in natural environments can benefit health
Speaker 1: and well being. Are we looking at things that create peace?
Speaker 1: When was the last time you patiently observed a leaf
Speaker 1: or a bird? When was the last time you watched
Speaker 1: a sunset or a sunrise? When was the last time
Speaker 1: you actually did something with your eyes that was peaceful?
Speaker 1: Scrolling on TikTok is not peaceful. Scrolling on Instagram is
Speaker 1: not peaceful. But peace comes from doing things that are peaceful.
Speaker 1: What is something that's peaceful? Something that's peaceful is patient.
Speaker 1: Something that's peaceful is more still than it is moving.
Speaker 1: Have you ever seen a sunset or a sunrise. It's moving,
Speaker 1: but it feels still. That's peace. Peace doesn't mean things
Speaker 1: are not moving, They're just moving at a natural pace.
Speaker 1: That's where we get peace. If we're not looking at
Speaker 1: connecting with peaceful things in nature, peaceful things in our life?
Speaker 1: How can we expect to experience peace? Another way is
Speaker 1: through sense. Smell has the ability to create more stillness.
Speaker 1: Why is it that when you go to a spa
Speaker 1: you feel more relaxed? Why is it that when you
Speaker 1: go for a massage you feel more chilled because the
Speaker 1: scent that they use allows you to relax, whether it's
Speaker 1: lavender or eucalyptus, whatever it may be. How many of
Speaker 1: you want to make space for more sense in your life?
Speaker 1: It can be simply by lighting a candle can make
Speaker 1: all the difference. And finally, cite sense and sounds. Is
Speaker 1: the music you're listening to creating peace? Listening to certain
Speaker 1: types of music can create peace. So often we're listening
Speaker 1: to music that is highly evocative, highly emotional, and all
Speaker 1: that doesn't create peace. When was the last time that
Speaker 1: you turned on a sound that brought joy to you? And?
Speaker 1: For me, listening to birds honestly just walking outside, finding
Speaker 1: a tree and just taking a second to walk past it.
Speaker 1: I don't have time to sit around under a tree,
Speaker 1: but when I do, Wow, the birds are beautiful. Just
Speaker 1: taking a moment to listen to a stream of water,
Speaker 1: taking a moment to even put something on in the house.
Speaker 1: Site sense and sounds are so powerful. The seventh way
Speaker 1: of creating more peace and balance in your life is
Speaker 1: stop assuming and over communicate. Peace and balance are lost
Speaker 1: when we assume, we assume why people do what they do.
Speaker 1: We assume that this is what's happened. We assume and
Speaker 1: we don't give people the benefit of the debt. We
Speaker 1: assume and think the worst of people, or we under communicate.
Speaker 1: We never ask questions, we never talk to someone about it,
Speaker 1: we never reflect. Communication leads to peace and balance, not
Speaker 1: huming or expecting. And the eighth and final one, which
Speaker 1: may surprise you, is you create more peace and balance
Speaker 1: when you work for something that you're happy to stress for.
Speaker 1: When you're happy experiencing stress, it doesn't feel like stress
Speaker 1: or pressure. It feels like peace. When you feel the
Speaker 1: joy of having gone out of your way for someone
Speaker 1: or something that you love, that feels like peace, even
Speaker 1: if it felt like imbalance. Create more memories and opportunities
Speaker 1: like that. I hope this list of eight will be
Speaker 1: something you practice this week. I'm so grateful you chose
Speaker 1: to listen to me on on purpose I am loving
Speaker 1: the energy. We just had our best two months ever.
Speaker 1: I am so grateful. It has been incredible. We just
Speaker 1: had our best two months ever all time listens, and
Speaker 1: it's only just getting better. Thank you so much for listening.
Speaker 1: Sending you so much love, m