Speaker 1: If you tuned into this thinking that you were gonna
Speaker 1: get Marie Condo tips, think again. Sorry, we should put
Speaker 1: a disclaimer at the beginning of this, like this is
Speaker 1: just us absolutely just trying to get more better at that.
Speaker 1: This is a bit just trying. We're not really doing it.
Speaker 1: We're just trying more better.
Speaker 2: More and more, a little more better more.
Speaker 1: Welcome to more Better.
Speaker 2: A podcast where we stop pretending to have it all
Speaker 2: together and embrace the journey of becoming a little more
Speaker 2: better every day.
Speaker 1: Or I mean, we're trying. Okay, we're trying. I'm trying.
Speaker 1: We are trying, We're you're trying, I'm trying. We're all
Speaker 1: trying together. That's why you're listening. That's most Famarro and
Speaker 1: that's Stephanie Beatrice and we're trying trying together. Okay, try there.
Speaker 1: That's what I should have called the podcast, trying to
Speaker 1: get together. You're trying too late to change. It's too late.
Speaker 1: People change their people change show titles, although I don't
Speaker 1: know if people have changed show titles like a TV
Speaker 1: show after it's aired. Oh yeah, I wonder that'd be crazy.
Speaker 1: What if Cheers was like called like the Big Bar
Speaker 1: or something like that they were like, cheers the big bar,
Speaker 1: you know, the big bar. Okay, how's it going, How
Speaker 1: are you doing? I'm doing pretty good in Atlanta.
Speaker 2: I'm still in Atlanta for anyone keeping tracks, still here,
Speaker 2: but my family's here this month and.
Speaker 1: It's all cute, really really amazing. How's antl treating you? Guys?
Speaker 2: So good at you know, it's just like, I'm more relaxed, David.
Speaker 1: It's more relaxed. The kids are super happy.
Speaker 2: It's just you know, a month, so I don't think
Speaker 2: it's too long or daunting for anyone, and it feels
Speaker 2: like a little break in this marathon of separation.
Speaker 1: Yes, are they are still going to school?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, We've had a really sweet school that was
Speaker 2: willing to take the little one for a month, and
Speaker 2: they've been so amazing for him, and he's made little
Speaker 2: friends and it's been great.
Speaker 1: He went on his first little field.
Speaker 2: Trip and then Enzo's been killing it with the tutor
Speaker 2: and like the homeschool situation, I think it's been kind
Speaker 2: of a nice break for him, kind of mentally, like
Speaker 2: just the little stress of school. And yeah, he's been
Speaker 2: killing it with his work and really focused. And then
Speaker 2: you know, he loves the free time too.
Speaker 1: And of course he does. How old, he's like right
Speaker 1: in that zone where he can like start to read
Speaker 1: stuff that he likes on his own, you know, he yeah,
Speaker 1: he can.
Speaker 2: Reading is a little bit of a struggle for him,
Speaker 2: but he if it is something that catches his interest,
Speaker 2: like he is into it and he's a really strong reader,
Speaker 2: like he's very good at decoding big words, and yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: and so but yeah, he's been Yeah, it's been great.
Speaker 2: It's been a nice break, I think for everyone. And
Speaker 2: even though it's like another kind of layer of exhaustion
Speaker 2: on top of everything else, it's like a good kind
Speaker 2: of exhaustion, you know. It's like it's just nice to
Speaker 2: have your family together. It's nice to come home to
Speaker 2: your family, man, and it's nice to see them in
Speaker 2: the morning, and it's nice to have a little more routine.
Speaker 2: And yeah, how are you doing.
Speaker 1: I'm good, you know, uh, just hanging out in La
Speaker 1: Just I'm very very happy that I get to spend
Speaker 1: so much time with Roz right now and Brad and like,
Speaker 1: you know, watching a lot of movies. Watched so many movies.
Speaker 1: One of the movies is not a bunch of us
Speaker 1: went and saw Captain America. It was like really fun.
Speaker 1: A bunch of us just met with opening weekend and
Speaker 1: that was really fun. Like we had our you know.
Speaker 2: I made Brad go get popcorn and he came back
Speaker 2: with like the branded giant popcorn that was like half
Speaker 2: the size of your body, with like a Captain America
Speaker 2: shields on the top, like our drinks at like tiny
Speaker 2: figurines on the top, like look at any Anthony.
Speaker 1: So it's been really like a cool highlight. I just
Speaker 1: love movies. I love Yeah.
Speaker 2: I have to say it's been really nice this season
Speaker 2: that I feel like there's been a really good mix
Speaker 2: of like big movies and like smaller, more indie feeling
Speaker 2: movies and like weird movies and movies that took big swings,
Speaker 2: and it's just been like a nice mix. It makes
Speaker 2: me hopeful for like a you know, an incoming creative
Speaker 2: renaissance that we're always hoping for.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: Well, I started watching Showgun. Have you seen I haven't
Speaker 2: seen shown?
Speaker 1: Ye? Good? It is wow. Also there's like a lot
Speaker 1: of hot people on it, so that's nice. Eye can't
Speaker 1: be really fun always helpful. Yeah, I'm I'm just you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm all, I'm pretty much caught up with all
Speaker 1: my housewives ladies doing good, just you know doing Yeah, girl,
Speaker 1: you're like living. I love it. I love this for you,
Speaker 1: just living my life over here. I mean, I'm I'm
Speaker 1: absolutely in need of uh I'm like looking around my office.
Speaker 1: You guys can't see me, but like my office is
Speaker 1: a trash right now, Like it is. Absolutely there's like
Speaker 1: a giant bag and like corner with like stuff to
Speaker 1: take to the goodwill. It's not more better?
Speaker 2: Well, how perfect for what we're discussing today is that's
Speaker 2: it will give you the push. We are talking about
Speaker 2: decluttering and spring cleaning. SOAR is gonna have an assignment
Speaker 2: after this.
Speaker 1: I do want to get more better at this. I
Speaker 1: do want to get more better at this because, like
Speaker 1: you know, spring cleaning is it's I'm I'm sure. I
Speaker 1: don't know if we have notes about this, but like
Speaker 1: there's like a tradition of you know, when the seasons change,
Speaker 1: it's important to like change with the season, right and
Speaker 1: so like when spring actually comes, we're not I'm not
Speaker 1: in it yet. We're not in it yet, but it
Speaker 1: is so nice to do things like sweep your front
Speaker 1: step or like you know, do the closet clean out
Speaker 1: or like turnover, Like, okay, the sweaters are going away,
Speaker 1: the jackets are getting going in the back of the
Speaker 1: clause or whatever the fuck. But like the amount of stuff,
Speaker 1: the amount of like it's like I just get so
Speaker 1: resistant to it. I guess is like I get resistant
Speaker 1: to the start.
Speaker 2: Of it, and I don't want to do it. I
Speaker 2: don't want to do it. You got done, you'll do it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, And like no, it can be a lot.
Speaker 1: I'm just not the kind of person that's like, let
Speaker 1: me get a list out or you know, I mean,
Speaker 1: I'll make a list, but like I'm not. I remember
Speaker 1: reading did you ever read The Little House on the
Speaker 1: Prairie books? Not watch the show, but read the books. No, okay,
Speaker 1: well there's still time for you. They're very good. But
Speaker 1: there was this thing in the Little House books where
Speaker 1: like Monday they would do the wash, Tuesday they would
Speaker 1: do this, Thursday they would do that, you know, like
Speaker 1: there was a day for like whatever. I can't. I
Speaker 1: can't live that way. I can't and I know my
Speaker 1: life would be better for it if I did stuff
Speaker 1: like that, but sure, I cannot do it. I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't do it.
Speaker 2: That surprises me because I feel like, I mean, I know,
Speaker 2: obviously people tidy up before like you come over, but
Speaker 2: like every time I've been to your house or even
Speaker 2: like just how your dressing room was laid out, I
Speaker 2: feel like you are so organized.
Speaker 1: Well I am organized. I'm very organized, and like I'm
Speaker 1: ruthless when it comes to stuff like m like you
Speaker 1: don't let yourself acquire too much. Well, but the thing
Speaker 1: that I'm just about throwing away. But I'm also like
Speaker 1: a major collector, so like I collect constantly, like I'm
Speaker 1: like a magpie. If it's shiny and interesting, I'm like
Speaker 1: I need one of those and one of those and
Speaker 1: one of those and one of those, you know, and
Speaker 1: so like I just accumulate so much. But I also like,
Speaker 1: am I'm good at like getting rid of stuff. It's
Speaker 1: just the the the organizing aspect of it, or like
Speaker 1: looking at it as a big mountain then I need
Speaker 1: to climb. It's different when I'm in my closet, like
Speaker 1: if we leave clothes out of it, because clothes are
Speaker 1: like a different category. I feel like they're like right,
Speaker 1: it's more about fashion and fun and like, yeah, utilizing
Speaker 1: what you have and blah blah blah blah blah. I'm
Speaker 1: talking about like stacks of books, like stuff that needs
Speaker 1: to get to the framer note books that are empty
Speaker 1: or half filled with stuff. You know, I'm just looking them, literally,
Speaker 1: just looking around at the stuff that I need to
Speaker 1: get rid of. I'm like, oh, you know, like, what's
Speaker 1: that piece of wrapping paper that I've had for six
Speaker 1: years that I just haven't used on anything because it's
Speaker 1: so pretty? You know, I like, what do I do
Speaker 1: with this little card from this thing that I got
Speaker 1: invited to that I don't want to throw away? But
Speaker 1: I where do I? You know?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so like oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: I get it. It can be a lot, and I
Speaker 2: and you know, like.
Speaker 1: It though you like doing it, I do. I love
Speaker 1: a good declutter and purject.
Speaker 2: I literally feel myself less stressed out after I do it.
Speaker 1: I was so judgmental without why. I was like why,
Speaker 1: I really was.
Speaker 2: Like, ew didn't even clock it didn't even God, you
Speaker 2: should have.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I you know, I.
Speaker 2: Love the ritual of spring cleaning. You know, it certainly
Speaker 2: hasn't happened every single year, because you know, there have
Speaker 2: been some crazy springs and then but like when it
Speaker 2: doesn't happen, it's like in the back of my mind
Speaker 2: and I'm stressed out, and I'm like, I've got to
Speaker 2: get it done before the fall comes, like something about
Speaker 2: like before the cold weather comes, like I still got
Speaker 2: to do this. And I would say we do like
Speaker 2: a big we did a big declutter purge of the
Speaker 2: whole house. Uh maybe like a year or so ago,
Speaker 2: you know, obviously, like the the goal is always to
Speaker 2: do it every year, but yeah, sometimes you don't need that.
Speaker 2: Like sometimes it's like to do the whole house. Like
Speaker 2: we went closet by closet, Like we picked a week
Speaker 2: that we didn't have much going on, and we were
Speaker 2: just like, okay, Monday, we're tackling the coat closet, which
Speaker 2: doesn't just have coats, it also has bins in there
Speaker 2: of like bullshit, Like there's a bin in there of
Speaker 2: beach bags. Do we need five beach bags? We use
Speaker 2: the same fucking one every time we go to the beach.
Speaker 2: We don't need the other ones, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Like five umbrellas, half of them were broken like shit
Speaker 2: like that, and we just like went closet by closet
Speaker 2: and then like drawer by drawer because we have like
Speaker 2: junk drawer, like what we call junk drawers. We have
Speaker 2: like one in our bedroom and one in the kitchen
Speaker 2: that like shit just kind of gets tossed into. So
Speaker 2: you don't like a junk drawer not. I fucking hate
Speaker 2: the junk.
Speaker 1: I love hate use. I refuse to have a junk
Speaker 1: drawer in my house. My husband is trying to turn
Speaker 1: the one. There's a drawer in the kitchen that holds
Speaker 1: like the keys, pens, no pads, and he kind only
Speaker 1: is putting it in there, and I'm just like, what
Speaker 1: is this? Get it out? I don't. But if you
Speaker 1: don't put it in there, where are you putting it?
Speaker 2: They throw away? Melissa, Well throw it away. Yes, if
Speaker 2: it isn't home, it needs to be in the trash.
Speaker 1: But does not have a home. That's and you know what,
Speaker 1: as I'm listening to you, I'm like, that's why I
Speaker 1: don't do this very often, because like everything has a home,
Speaker 1: and if it doesn't have a home, I throw it away.
Speaker 1: And Brad has gotten so annoyed with me before because
Speaker 1: he's like, Oh, I'm like where does this live? Where
Speaker 1: does this? Where's this? You? Know, like where does this live?
Speaker 1: Where's the home for this? And he's like, yeah, why
Speaker 1: do you talk about these things like it's not which
Speaker 1: is so weird because I am obsessive about it needs
Speaker 1: a little home. It needs to have a home, and
Speaker 1: it can't just go in a bin. Can't be in
Speaker 1: a bin, you know, Like I'm like, it has to
Speaker 1: have a home. But what happens if you don't have
Speaker 1: it like a home?
Speaker 2: Like like good, But there's some things that you don't
Speaker 2: random that you don't live here.
Speaker 1: You don't live here. Exe to me what a random
Speaker 1: thing would be. Tell me what a random thing would be.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you where I'll put it. Well, challenge me.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think what's in our bedroom? So our
Speaker 2: bedroom junk drawer is a bedroom a mix of girl.
Speaker 1: It's a drawer. It closes. I'll have to look at it.
Speaker 2: Okay, it has a mix of uh, notebooks, no block
Speaker 2: of ew.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 2: We have books everywhere. I literally don't have space on
Speaker 2: any shelf.
Speaker 1: You need to throw at some of those books. But
Speaker 1: half of them we use.
Speaker 2: And then maybe there's one or two in there that
Speaker 2: are probably maybe that are like maybe sentimental.
Speaker 1: Here's what I think if it's a novel and you're like,
Speaker 1: I am so proud that I read this book and
Speaker 1: I want to read it again someday, keep it. But
Speaker 1: books are trophies, essentially, their trophies their trophies to like
Speaker 1: display of like look at how smart I am, like
Speaker 1: all these books that I read, and so unless they're
Speaker 1: being used as a reference, stugy it is, unless they're
Speaker 1: be to me, Unless they're being used as a reference,
Speaker 1: or you know that you're going to lend them out
Speaker 1: to someone else after I've read it, I'm just like goodbye,
Speaker 1: oh good bye. I don't need you anymore. Like I'm
Speaker 1: never going to read My Court of Thorns and Roses again,
Speaker 1: Like I already read it, you know, right right, right right, goodbye.
Speaker 2: We have a lot of books in our bedroom book
Speaker 2: most of them are like books we plan on reading
Speaker 2: and then. But I also like I I.
Speaker 1: Have my whole life.
Speaker 2: I still don't really have this, but like you know,
Speaker 2: when you see it in fancy houses, there's like a
Speaker 2: study or like a room with a big bookshelf. I mean,
Speaker 2: I kind of have a big bookshelf, but it's like
Speaker 2: in the kid's room, and you know, the top half
Speaker 2: of it as mine. There's something aesthetically beautiful about that.
Speaker 2: And I also find it, like, I don't know, cozy
Speaker 2: and comforting. So like for me seeing books around that
Speaker 2: we've read is just there's something visually kind of cozy
Speaker 2: about it that I just joy looking at. And I
Speaker 2: just also have a dream of having a room where
Speaker 2: there's like a library, a library, yeah, where there's like
Speaker 2: all these books and it's not about like the books
Speaker 2: we've read or haven't read or you know, trophies. Let's
Speaker 2: be real, it's true not And I do like to
Speaker 2: go back and write. I do like go back to
Speaker 2: reference like reference books.
Speaker 1: But I don't know, I.
Speaker 2: Just it's just something that is like cozy and comforting
Speaker 2: to me. Like I will sit in that room sometimes
Speaker 2: and like stare at all the books and be like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 2: remember that one, or like I still have we have
Speaker 2: all the plays that we've read or like worked from.
Speaker 2: There's like one that's like full of plays and like
Speaker 2: I will thumb through that sometimes or just look at
Speaker 2: it and be like, I don't know, it's like little memories.
Speaker 1: I guess, yeah that makessonally that makes sense. I mean
Speaker 1: I think library like I'm just saying, like with the notebooks,
Speaker 1: what are the notebooks in the drunk drawer? Like what
Speaker 1: are are they like spiral notebooks? Are they? Like? Are
Speaker 1: they also to look at? Like what is the deal
Speaker 1: with these notebooks?
Speaker 2: Yeah? There is, Yeah, there's a couple spirals. They're like
Speaker 2: David and I are both list makers. Otherwise we can't
Speaker 2: remember shit, right, so we have so those sometimes are
Speaker 2: I think like the top two notebooks are like our
Speaker 2: notebooks that we grab sometimes when we have to make
Speaker 2: like bigger lists because we also have like pads of
Speaker 2: paper in the kitchen junk drawer, but that's more for
Speaker 2: like shorter lists and groceries and stuff.
Speaker 1: This is junk so far these things belong in the drawer,
Speaker 1: Like oh yeah, junk drawer is.
Speaker 2: Just like a phrase. And then there's a big notebook
Speaker 2: in there that's like a leather notebook that was given
Speaker 2: to me as a gift that I was supposed to
Speaker 2: use as a journal and I never did.
Speaker 1: But it has a very sweet inscription in it, and
Speaker 1: I have written in it a little bit. But my
Speaker 1: brain is like, rip out the inscription, get rid of
Speaker 1: the leather notebook. I can't. I refuse to buy an
Speaker 1: ugly notebook. This is like, oh yeah, that's pretty. It
Speaker 1: has to be esthetically like pleasant to be out on
Speaker 1: the counter.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, in case it's out on the counter. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I do that too.
Speaker 1: This one that I'm holding up is like covered in
Speaker 1: flowers and stuff. Like in the drawer next to me
Speaker 1: is it's my desk strawer, And there's like a compartment
Speaker 1: for everything, Like there's a it's this is the desk drawer.
Speaker 1: But if I need a lighter, I know exactly where
Speaker 1: it is. If I need the pencil sharpener, I know
Speaker 1: exactly where it is. If I need the glue, I
Speaker 1: know exactly where it is, the stikler, whatever, whatever.
Speaker 2: The junk drawer can be organizational. I wouldn't say I'm
Speaker 2: trying to think of what else is in that drawer. Oh,
Speaker 2: there's there's some eyeglass cases in there in case you
Speaker 2: need one.
Speaker 1: We both were glasses.
Speaker 2: It's like, and then there's like some travel stuff. There's
Speaker 2: like a ziplock of like charging cords and extra like
Speaker 2: squares that.
Speaker 1: Goes with the suitcases. There does not need to be
Speaker 1: like in the suitcases. It goes with the travel stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but sometimes we're putting suitcases inside suitcases in our
Speaker 2: little like storage area where the suitcases go for saving space.
Speaker 1: There's a little area needs to be near this travel
Speaker 1: stuff where like you keep your little travel bags and
Speaker 1: like your You're like, yeah, but ours is like outside
Speaker 1: and like in the garage. And then there's like, let me,
Speaker 1: here's the thing. Different things work for different families, Yeah, obviously,
Speaker 1: but like I mean, I feel like we're both saying
Speaker 1: the same thing that like isis guys. Our producer was like,
Speaker 1: this will be a fun episode, and like as she
Speaker 1: said it, I was like, a' so fucking moly, not
Speaker 1: it won't. It's gonna give me anxiety. My shoulders will
Speaker 1: like up on my ears. I hate liss, I hate it.
Speaker 2: I like I will say that things do get tossed
Speaker 2: in that drawer a lot, and so every few months
Speaker 2: I will empty the whole drawer and throw out shit
Speaker 2: and then like kind of just keep the shit that
Speaker 2: I know we still use or grab and like, and it's.
Speaker 1: Always like half of what was fucking in there.
Speaker 2: Sometimes you're just you know what it is too. Like
Speaker 2: David a little bit more than me hates like clutter
Speaker 2: on like the counter eat on our dresser or like
Speaker 2: right and so. But sometimes there's things that you're like,
Speaker 2: oh fuck, like I'm you know, I can't throw this
Speaker 2: out yet, I might need to get it later whatever,
Speaker 2: or I'm not sure, so it just goes in the drawer.
Speaker 1: It's also like just like a like a quiz can't
Speaker 1: see me, but I'm rubbing my face because you're just
Speaker 1: like trying to declutter quickly and you don't have time
Speaker 1: to like go through every fucking thing and check with
Speaker 1: your partner do we need this? Do we not?
Speaker 2: Can't throw this out, so it just gets like shoved
Speaker 2: in the drawer and then we go through the drawer
Speaker 2: when it's full.
Speaker 1: System. It's a system. Hate it. We have a kitchen peninsula,
Speaker 1: and like Brad is amazing in so many ways, he
Speaker 1: will clean the whole peninsula. Everything is like spick and span.
Speaker 1: He loves to clean. And then in the middle of
Speaker 1: the peninsul will be a giant mountain of just bullshit,
Speaker 1: like bullshit that what just put it away? And like
Speaker 1: I've realized in our partnership, I am the one. I
Speaker 1: am the one that needs to put these things away
Speaker 1: or choose whether or not they go in the trash right,
Speaker 1: and like I try so hard, like the systems that
Speaker 1: I put in place, I try to get him to
Speaker 1: understand what it is about the system that I want
Speaker 1: to have happened, Like there was there's like a bookshelf.
Speaker 1: We do have a big bookshelf in our living room
Speaker 1: that has bottom is kids books, middle is like reference materials,
Speaker 1: and you know, there's lots of pictures on the shelf.
Speaker 1: And then on the very top of the shelf to
Speaker 1: the right is where we're supposed to put the bills.
Speaker 1: Incoming bills, outgoing bills. Chargers are in a little box.
Speaker 1: And then both of the laptops are supposed to sit
Speaker 1: right on top of each other. And that's it. That's all.
Speaker 1: It's supposed to be there. Every time I pass by
Speaker 1: and I look at it, and Marie Kondo talks about this,
Speaker 1: the visual eye clutter of that is like so fucking
Speaker 1: it makes me fucking insane. I want to put my
Speaker 1: fists through a wall, like it is horrifying for me,
Speaker 1: Like I can't handle it. I can handle it visually,
Speaker 1: I just get so overwhelmed. And I think that that's
Speaker 1: why I get really overwhelmed when it's like Okay, let's
Speaker 1: do this room, you know, like and I can do it.
Speaker 1: I like I wish I, you know, could put my
Speaker 1: brain in a space where like I'm gonna do this
Speaker 1: this week with my partner, but I don't think my
Speaker 1: partner works that way, so like I often feel like
Speaker 1: I'm doing it by myself, you know, But like I
Speaker 1: just like the visual. The visual of like all the
Speaker 1: stuff everywhere is so hard for me. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, here's the other thing that really fucks everything up.
Speaker 1: Children forget it, honey.
Speaker 2: And the amount of shit that they acquire as they
Speaker 2: get older when they come home from a fucking birthday party.
Speaker 2: By the way, can we campaign to just get rid
Speaker 2: of gift bags a gift by Every time my kid
Speaker 2: comes home with a fucking plastic bag, I want to scream, okay,
Speaker 2: because then they want to keep every little fucking plastic
Speaker 2: thing that's in there, And I'm like, this is bad
Speaker 2: for the environment.
Speaker 1: No one asked you to do this. I don't understand it.
Speaker 2: Now they're expecting it.
Speaker 1: What would be a good Like do we just give
Speaker 1: them money? Like do we hand them like a five dollars,
Speaker 1: like five dollars like as we don't do anything like
Speaker 1: I don't have to treat if they want, Okay, a cookie,
Speaker 1: A cookie, I like that, an edible gift, an edible gift,
Speaker 1: that's nice.
Speaker 2: Or like times I was like, in lieu of Favors,
Speaker 2: we have made a donation to this charity Favors.
Speaker 1: Bye, thanks for coming in lou of Favors. You don't
Speaker 1: have bullshit coming into your house. Okay, you can tell
Speaker 1: us thank you you are. I am not going to
Speaker 1: send you home with some FuG and bullshit.
Speaker 2: A book so could be cute, you know, it's something
Speaker 2: that you like, actually use, but I really hate gift bags.
Speaker 2: And then they want to keep all of it. And
Speaker 2: then now my, you know, they have like their little
Speaker 2: bedside tables and in those drawers it's just all the
Speaker 2: fucking shit they want to save. And then I have
Speaker 2: to sneak in there and go through it and like
Speaker 2: see what I can throw out that they won't miss
Speaker 2: or notice, and or like the shoes, you know, they'll
Speaker 2: like rip a like a Enzo's a little bit like this,
Speaker 2: Like he has a pair of nikes that are absolutely trashed,
Speaker 2: absolutely trashed, but he loves that, he loves them, and
Speaker 2: so he still has them and we've bought him new
Speaker 2: shoes because we're like, these are really bad, you like
Speaker 2: you need like nicer. Yeah, these are about to bust open.
Speaker 2: But yeah, just like things like shoes, things like you know.
Speaker 2: And then I always call it inventory when I this
Speaker 2: is also something I do part of my uh spring cleaning,
Speaker 2: and it's very overwhelming, but I try to do it. Actually,
Speaker 2: you before summer and then before winter because that's when
Speaker 2: they need new clothes usually. But like I go through
Speaker 2: all their shit, check all the sizes. Inevitably they're shit
Speaker 2: in there that doesn't fit them anymore, right, right, that
Speaker 2: you know, just goes unnoticed or they just like don't
Speaker 2: you don't put it on them, but you keep it
Speaker 2: in the drawer because you're busy.
Speaker 1: Right, and then this suddenly it doesn't fit them.
Speaker 2: And it's like eight in the morning when you're rushing
Speaker 2: to get them to school and you're like, these pants
Speaker 2: don't fit and you just drove them back in the drawer.
Speaker 2: So I go through all the clothes, get rid of
Speaker 2: like whatever doesn't fit or that they never wear, that
Speaker 2: they don't like, whatever it is that has holes in it.
Speaker 2: And then yeah, just like all their they're junk and
Speaker 2: like they're it's.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. And then all the things that come
Speaker 1: home from school.
Speaker 2: We have two folders in the kitchen, one for Axle,
Speaker 2: one for Enzo that we kind of like, you know,
Speaker 2: accomplishments or like things they come home with that they're
Speaker 2: proud of that you have to like wait to throw
Speaker 2: out because if you throw out in front of them,
Speaker 2: you're gonna like devastate them. So I'll like stick it
Speaker 2: in their folder.
Speaker 1: It's true how many of us have like memories of
Speaker 1: being like holding back tears while you watch your parents
Speaker 1: like throw it away, right.
Speaker 2: You can't do that shit in front of you. Know
Speaker 2: how many times I've been caught you have they've caught you.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, they've caught me.
Speaker 1: They go to throw something out and they're like either
Speaker 1: what does yeah, and then I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. That must have been a mistake. Or
Speaker 1: I thought you were done with it. We celebrated and
Speaker 1: then you know, and then I thought we were done.
Speaker 2: But yeah, and then so I go through those folders
Speaker 2: once they start getting fat, Yeah, yeah, better.
Speaker 1: Better. That's a good idea to keep the little the
Speaker 1: folders in the kitchen or whatever, and like.
Speaker 2: Just like two folders in the kitchen so you can
Speaker 2: just like throw their shit in there and then you know,
Speaker 2: and then I do, like I have a in one closet.
Speaker 2: I do have like a little storage drawer with like
Speaker 2: just labeled like kid memories of like I'm sentimental, so
Speaker 2: like no I have cute drawings or like you know
Speaker 2: when they make them do like a thing for their
Speaker 2: birthday and kindergarten that says all their favorite things or whatever,
Speaker 2: Like I keep that shit and I put it like
Speaker 2: in the drawer because I look at it and sob
Speaker 2: when they go to college and totally try to give
Speaker 2: it to them and they'll be like are giving this
Speaker 2: to me? I want to make sure that you do
Speaker 2: have I mean, depending on the kind of person you are,
Speaker 2: but I think most of us are sentimental in some
Speaker 2: kind of way. So like you want to just like
Speaker 2: you don't want to inundate yourself, but you want to
Speaker 2: make sure that you have a space that's like these
Speaker 2: are the things that are sacred and like they're not
Speaker 2: going anywhere, you know. But it can be hard when
Speaker 2: you don't have a lot of space. Like my, yeah,
Speaker 2: closets in my house are kind of small, and I
Speaker 2: have to be like very strategic about where I put
Speaker 2: little storage boxes or things like that and try to
Speaker 2: think of systems that work and then be really selective.
Speaker 1: About what I save. And but saying we don't have
Speaker 1: a lot of storage, I mean, and I remember when
Speaker 1: we were buying this house, I was like, should be
Speaker 1: at a closet or something like we should be, you know.
Speaker 1: And there's attic space, which is great. Attic space is
Speaker 1: lovely for extra you know, putting things in like plastic
Speaker 1: tins or plastic bags or plastic.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we have that, like next to our garage. We
Speaker 2: like a little storage room, a tiny little room.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you don't want to like stick, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Attics are also not they get really hot. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So I don't want to like say, treasured things up there,
Speaker 1: you know, yes, exactly. Do you still have your wedding dress?
Speaker 1: I do. I do too.
Speaker 2: It's in a big old box that takes up so
Speaker 2: much fucking room. It's like properly, you know, my mom
Speaker 2: got it preserved or what she did, and it's just
Speaker 2: like in the box that it came in. I just
Speaker 2: never opened it and it's just shoved up at the
Speaker 2: top of that.
Speaker 1: That storage for. I don't know what I got two boys.
Speaker 2: Maybe you never know, they marry women someday and they
Speaker 2: want to use we never know ace.
Speaker 1: Or some shit. I don't know, but I've seen tons
Speaker 1: of videos lately where girls go and like use their
Speaker 1: grandmothers or their moms and they turn it into like
Speaker 1: a cute little like after party dress or yeah.
Speaker 2: Oh, actually my wedding dress would look really cute as
Speaker 2: like a little mini actual mini.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And like I've seen the girls like put little
Speaker 1: like cute little sleeves.
Speaker 2: On it, or like, oh, I'm wearing this on my honeymoon.
Speaker 2: It was my mom's or whatever, So I think that's cute.
Speaker 1: H I. I feel like what I'm learning in this
Speaker 1: conversation is that I don't like to do the big
Speaker 1: decluttering because I want it to be I wanted to maintain.
Speaker 1: I want it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to be in a maintaince phase always.
Speaker 2: I don't ever want to.
Speaker 1: Have to do like the deep dive, because the deep
Speaker 1: dive is the thing that makes me. And here I
Speaker 1: will be very honest. When we moved into this house,
Speaker 1: we used an organizer, we used a professional organizer, and
Speaker 1: I was like I am. I don't want any birthday presents.
Speaker 1: I don't want any Christmas presents. I don't want an
Speaker 1: anniversary present. I was like, I am serious, Brad, I
Speaker 1: want this is the luxury gift that you're going to
Speaker 1: get me for my birthday? For for the I don't
Speaker 1: want to push present. I don't want any that shit.
Speaker 1: I want a fucking real organizer, you know. And I
Speaker 1: will say, I mean that's something that not everyone can do,
Speaker 1: but everybody. I feel like everybody either knows has a
Speaker 1: friend that's really good at this or is pretty darn
Speaker 1: good out of themselves, and like utilize them because if
Speaker 1: you can't do this thing on your own, like I
Speaker 1: can't do this. I can maintain the system and I'm
Speaker 1: really good at it. But you can't talk him up
Speaker 1: with this system, y'all. I can't. I did try. So.
Speaker 1: The one time that I did this was when I
Speaker 1: was moving from being a single person into we had
Speaker 1: I think we'd gotten married and we were now moving
Speaker 1: from the apartment that we shared into a house. I
Speaker 1: guess I think we're we were building, we were, it
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. We were moving, that's the real joint. And
Speaker 1: when we were moving I read that Marie Condo book,
Speaker 1: Oh The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, And she's
Speaker 1: got this like incredible system in it, and if you
Speaker 1: follow the system, you will get rid of shit, but
Speaker 1: you will also be like drowning in a mountain of
Speaker 1: your own shit. Like it is you really see how
Speaker 1: much stuff you have because she makes you go through it.
Speaker 1: She doesn't let you go like room by room. She's like,
Speaker 1: start with your books. This is probably why I'm so
Speaker 1: brutal about books. Start with your books. Then you do
Speaker 1: your clothes. Then you do I think isis had it
Speaker 1: written down, but like I can't remember where it is.
Speaker 1: It's like first you commit, yeah, then you have to
Speaker 1: like imagine, like what what do you want your ideal
Speaker 1: lifestyle to be? And then you start like discarding stuff
Speaker 1: and you the method is like does this spark joy?
Speaker 1: So you literally have to put your hands on everything
Speaker 1: that you own, and by the time that you're done,
Speaker 1: you're like why do I have so much shit? Like
Speaker 1: why do I have all this stuff? Like I don't
Speaker 1: want any of this, Like I don't want this, you know,
Speaker 1: And it's really useful. It takes forever, though it took
Speaker 1: I think it took a week to go through everything.
Speaker 1: But it was like, you know, I mean I was
Speaker 1: put in work. I was like, yeah, I was putting
Speaker 1: in work because you take everything like you take all
Speaker 1: of the books off the shelves, like you take you
Speaker 1: take all of the clothes out of the closet. You
Speaker 1: know what I mean?
Speaker 2: It's not right, Like, wait, let's talk about clothes as
Speaker 2: someone who loves fashion and has a lot of clothes.
Speaker 1: How do you get? What do you mean? How dare you?
Speaker 1: I speak truth? You do? So this is what I so? Okay,
Speaker 1: when I was in Toronto, I had like a bit
Speaker 1: of a capsule wardrobe because right, and I actually loved
Speaker 1: everything that I bought and wore in Toronto. I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, these are my colors. I love this
Speaker 1: stuff like I really felt like using less made me
Speaker 1: more aware of what I like to wear. So then
Speaker 1: when I got back, I went through my whole closet
Speaker 1: and that was hell. I went through my whole closet,
Speaker 1: got rid of a ton of shit because I bought
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff in Toronto. I think the main
Speaker 1: rules that I have for stuff is like I don't
Speaker 1: have any hard and fast rules like you know how
Speaker 1: you hear, Oh, if you don't wear it in two years,
Speaker 1: then you should get rid of it. No, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: I have a vintage Valentino dress in my closet that
Speaker 1: I've owned for five years. I've never worn it. I'm
Speaker 1: waiting for the time to wear it. I'm not getting
Speaker 1: rid of that.
Speaker 2: You know, we've all heard my regret story about the
Speaker 2: DVF dress that I when I was in my twenties
Speaker 2: because I didn't think I was gonna wear it again,
Speaker 2: And now forty year only is like, why don't I
Speaker 2: have a dress?
Speaker 1: Yeah. So there's some things that like I hold onto
Speaker 1: that are important. But at the same time, I think
Speaker 1: it's very, very very You've got to ask yourself periodically,
Speaker 1: do you am I wearing this or am I holding
Speaker 1: onto it? Because like, like, okay, So something that I
Speaker 1: learned to do recently is I if I have like
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes or whatever, I'll go in my closet and
Speaker 1: I'll like try stuff on and take pictures and make
Speaker 1: new outfits or whatever. And yesterday I tried on a
Speaker 1: sweater that I was like, oh, this is such a
Speaker 1: pretty sweater, and I put it on. I like tried
Speaker 1: it on with jeans, and I tried it on with
Speaker 1: the different pair of pants, and I tried it on
Speaker 1: with something else. I was like, I don't like this.
Speaker 1: This is really pretty on the hangar. I don't like this.
Speaker 1: This is something for me, and I never reach for it.
Speaker 1: And that's why, because I don't know how to wear
Speaker 1: it in a way that makes me feel like me. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna get rid of it.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: That's a good stuff like that. It's like if I
Speaker 1: don't know how to absolutely like grab it and put
Speaker 1: it on and wear it in a way that feels
Speaker 1: like me, Yeah, I gotta let it go. Yeah, even
Speaker 1: if I paid a lot for it, even if it
Speaker 1: was a gift, even if like whatever, whatever, you know,
Speaker 1: Like that's how I am with books too. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I already read it. I did it. I already did it.
Speaker 1: I don't want it, I don't need it, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, I did do the the hangar trick for
Speaker 2: a while where because I again small closet, so I
Speaker 2: need to like every spring, like all the winter shit
Speaker 2: goes away and I bring out my summer stuff and
Speaker 2: vice versa, and so and my friend.
Speaker 1: Chazz shout out Chaz.
Speaker 2: He told me about it. He was like, when you
Speaker 2: put all that spring stuff, he was like, put every
Speaker 2: hanger like backwards, and then when you wear the thing,
Speaker 2: like put it back the normal way. And at the
Speaker 2: end of the summer you'll see all everything that you
Speaker 2: didn't wear that summer.
Speaker 1: And I kind of liked it. It was kind of
Speaker 1: a neat trick.
Speaker 2: Like at the end of the summer or when I
Speaker 2: was whenever I was getting ready to like do the switch,
Speaker 2: I saw all these, you know, and some of them
Speaker 2: I kept. I was like, oh, I don't wear that,
Speaker 2: but I still really love it, and like, you know,
Speaker 2: I'm going to keep it.
Speaker 1: And then there.
Speaker 2: Were like a lot of things and I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: this makes sense why I did not wear this all summer.
Speaker 1: I don't think I actually like it. I'm going to
Speaker 1: get rid of it.
Speaker 2: It was just like a very easy visual thing. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it helped me get rid of stuff. Now we see
Speaker 2: you when you shop when you buy, do you get
Speaker 2: rid of stuff? Like do you get rid of stuff?
Speaker 2: Because I do that one for one yeah, one for
Speaker 2: one ish. I mean I try, I really do try.
Speaker 2: There is That's why there's.
Speaker 1: Like a bag in the corner of my office right now,
Speaker 1: I has stuff in it because there is stuff that
Speaker 1: needs to go to the donation center. I really try,
Speaker 1: but I also don't. I don't always subscribe to that
Speaker 1: because I think there are like not holes in my closet,
Speaker 1: but there's like things that I'm like what wish I had,
Speaker 1: like a you know, yeah, yeah, And if I don't
Speaker 1: have it, then I'm not going to get rid of
Speaker 1: something that I already wear or like love or have
Speaker 1: sentimental value to whatever. You know, I'm not going to
Speaker 1: get rid of it just because I brought something new in. However,
Speaker 1: I do think I'm not always that way with clothes,
Speaker 1: but I am that way with stuff, like yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't want You know, a kid's stuff is really a
Speaker 1: hard one because they get so attached to toys, and
Speaker 1: you know, everybody says, like cycle the toys up, like
Speaker 1: with what time? Like when are you guys cycling toys?
Speaker 1: Like I don't know, I don't have the time. But
Speaker 1: I think that that we did do when we were
Speaker 1: cleaning up for Christmas, we stuck a bunch of her
Speaker 1: I have to be quiet because she's in the other room.
Speaker 1: We stuck a bunch of her stuffies downstairs, and then
Speaker 1: before we brought all the stuff he's back upstairs. I did,
Speaker 1: like I was like throw like into a bag for
Speaker 1: a donation because I was like, oh, she doesn't play
Speaker 1: with this, she doesn't play with them for a month.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: When my kids were smaller, I would if I noticed
Speaker 2: there were some toys they weren't really playing with, I
Speaker 2: would just put them in a closet and wait. And
Speaker 2: if they didn't ask for that toy or they didn't
Speaker 2: notice that it was gone out of here here in
Speaker 2: the garbage or to the donation center, I think, you know,
Speaker 2: one of the things that I think I learned from
Speaker 2: the Maricondo thing was like that question of like when
Speaker 2: you hold something and it does it spark joy? Part
Speaker 2: of that is like it's okay.
Speaker 1: As somebody who grew up with not very much money
Speaker 1: at all, it is so hard for me to let
Speaker 1: things go when I know I spent money on them.
Speaker 1: Yeah it's pretty. And that's something that I've learned as
Speaker 1: an adult that's like okay, though, Like yeah, and it
Speaker 1: might be easy for me to say, but if if
Speaker 1: I'm holding on to something because I spend money on it,
Speaker 1: but it is like weighing me down, Like it's in
Speaker 1: my house and it's like taking up space. It's causing
Speaker 1: me stress, and like you know, it's like I don't
Speaker 1: have any room in my closet because I have all
Speaker 1: these pairs of gens because you know, I bought them,
Speaker 1: but I don't wear them because they don't fit. It's like,
Speaker 1: so who am I? How am I winning here? You know,
Speaker 1: like this is not a win for me in any way,
Speaker 1: shape or form. Right, So that's something that I think
Speaker 1: is a way to get more better at This is
Speaker 1: like accepting that like you already, like that money's gone,
Speaker 1: you already spent it. You done spend it already, you know,
Speaker 1: unless this is like a vintage investment piece that we're
Speaker 1: talking about, Like let's set that aside. It's like a
Speaker 1: shirt or a toy or a book or like something.
Speaker 1: It's like the money was already spent. Now do you
Speaker 1: still like this thing? Do you still want to have
Speaker 1: it around? Or are you keeping it around because you
Speaker 1: spent money on it and you've assigned a dollar amount
Speaker 1: to it and that's the value of it, Like is
Speaker 1: it you know? Or could you get rid of it
Speaker 1: or could you get rid of it, could you say
Speaker 1: by start it out? Yeah, start it away.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is always very liberating and like.
Speaker 1: When once you do it, Yeah, I want to feel that.
Speaker 1: I want to feel that way all the time. I
Speaker 1: want I want constant. I say this, I'm like, God, like,
Speaker 1: it's not that much. It's it's like five things, but
Speaker 1: it's making me crazy because it just make a.
Speaker 2: Schedule girl be like I'm gonna do this this day, this, this, this,
Speaker 2: like well I have to.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I just take schedule letters up and then like
Speaker 1: toss these things in the fucking yeah. But also like
Speaker 1: put in the schedule put I can't throw these away.
Speaker 1: You can't throw those away. Those cutey little handprints like
Speaker 1: tulip my kid made a Valentine for me, and they're
Speaker 1: like from school and they're little, the little red hand prints.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: See that's what the special kid memory memory were. Yeah.
Speaker 1: More better. I don't know, I mean, do you feel
Speaker 1: like we like, did we just tell everyone what we
Speaker 1: think about those? Like? What?
Speaker 2: What?
Speaker 1: How did we I don't know if I got more
Speaker 1: better at this.
Speaker 2: I don't know that we actually gave any tips or
Speaker 2: I feel like we just vented.
Speaker 1: Oh we did anything today? Today, we just bullshitted. You
Speaker 1: know what, if you too thinking that you were going
Speaker 1: to get Marie condo tips, think again. Sorry, we should
Speaker 1: put a disclaimer at the beginning of this, like this
Speaker 1: is just us absolutely just trying to get more better
Speaker 1: at that. This is just trying, We're not really doing it.
Speaker 1: I do feel inspired for when I go home.
Speaker 2: Do you I'm going to get rid of some books, Stephanie,
Speaker 2: I'm going.
Speaker 1: To get rid of some books. Text me a little
Speaker 1: pile of book I will. I will.
Speaker 2: A little bit of that did creep in because we do.
Speaker 2: You know, we have too many piles of books. I
Speaker 2: try to make them look cute, like they're like like
Speaker 2: on purpose. But it's time to It's time like those
Speaker 2: trophies like okay, all right, relax.
Speaker 1: Do you feel more better? I do. I feel a
Speaker 1: little more better. I feel I feel like I need
Speaker 1: to clean out our quote unquote junk drawer. Yuck. Why
Speaker 1: do we have all these keys? What do these keys
Speaker 1: go to?
Speaker 2: Maybe you just have to like rebrand it. Maybe it
Speaker 2: just needs a different name.
Speaker 1: It's not a it's.
Speaker 2: It is not I refuse, it's a it's an extra drawer.
Speaker 2: It's the brad doesn't know what to do with this.
Speaker 2: So it's the it's the yeah, the husband drawer, the
Speaker 2: miscellaneous drawer.
Speaker 1: You know, everything has a place, and everything in its
Speaker 1: place or whatever however that's saying goes, where's its home?
Speaker 1: Oh god, I would at home. That would drive you
Speaker 1: would hate it. I would do where does this live? Where?
Speaker 1: I would absolutely I'd love to say it. And it's
Speaker 1: my favorite thing. This doesn't live in here, This doesn't
Speaker 1: live in here? Where does this live? Oh? Shit?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Yeah she is, Yeah, she is. Anyway to hear it
Speaker 1: in her brain? In her brain. Yeah, when she's an adult,
Speaker 1: she moves out. How does this live? She'll like it.
Speaker 1: It's fine. Thanks for joining us on today's session of
Speaker 1: Bitch About Cleaning. See you next week. Let's see you
Speaker 1: next week. Do you have something you'd like to be
Speaker 1: more better at that you want us to talk about
Speaker 1: in a future episode.
Speaker 2: Can you relate to our struggles or have you tried
Speaker 2: one of our tips and tricks?
Speaker 1: Shoot us your thoughts and ideas at Morebetter pod at
Speaker 1: gmail dot com and include a voice note if you
Speaker 1: want to be featured on the pod. Ooh More Better
Speaker 1: with Stephanie Melissa is a production from WV Sound and
Speaker 1: iHeartMedia's Mike Utura podcast network, hosted by me, Steffie Beatrice,
Speaker 1: and Melissa more Better is produced by Isis Madrid and
Speaker 1: Sophie Spencer Zagos. Our executive producers are Wilmer Valderrama and
Speaker 1: Leo Clem at w V Sound. This episode was edited
Speaker 1: by Isis Madrid and engineered by Sean Tracy and features
Speaker 1: original music by Madison Davenport and Halo Boy. Our cover
Speaker 1: art is by vincent Remy's and photography by David Avalos.
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,
Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. See you
Speaker 1: next week's Suga Bye