WEBVTT - Episode 08 Ft Dante Nero 0:00:08.840 --> 0:00:11.520 Hey, what's up? It is Angela. Ye, I'm Stephanie Santiago, 0:00:12.520 --> 0:00:15.280 Liam McSweeney. Why do I feel like you're like vibrating 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:20.080 or echoing or something to me? What was my instro? 0:00:20.160 --> 0:00:23.439 A little much? No, you're okay? And Dante, how you doing? 0:00:23.560 --> 0:00:28.720 I'm Dante Nero, Dante Narrow, comedian, comedian actor. Uh, his 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:32.680 own podcast. Yeah, I do little acting, stand up comedy, 0:00:32.840 --> 0:00:37.000 and I have a podcast on a from a relationship, 0:00:37.040 --> 0:00:42.440 podcast from a masculine perspective? What's a masculine perspective relationship? 0:00:43.520 --> 0:00:45.240 I was, actually I was. I was a male strip 0:00:45.240 --> 0:00:49.880 before like eleven years, a male strip that from that 0:00:50.080 --> 0:00:52.640 I ended up being. I got a little bit into 0:00:52.640 --> 0:00:55.560 the pimp game for about seven but for about seven 0:00:55.640 --> 0:00:59.080 years and then I had a lot of guys who 0:00:59.120 --> 0:01:02.920 were having problems with their relationships and I started applying 0:01:03.080 --> 0:01:06.560 pimp principles to square relationships. Okay, so let me ask 0:01:06.560 --> 0:01:09.080 you something about males stipping. Now. I have a great 0:01:09.120 --> 0:01:12.200 time because I've hosted some mail review shows and it's 0:01:12.200 --> 0:01:15.960 always really fun. But I know sometimes they say, like 0:01:16.000 --> 0:01:18.000 there's certain things that you have to do because your 0:01:18.000 --> 0:01:20.640 dick has to look hard, and well, that's what you're 0:01:20.640 --> 0:01:22.640 talking about is beefing up. What a god does is 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:26.080 he jerks off and then what they usually will take 0:01:26.240 --> 0:01:30.000 is a half inch of a spandage and they tied 0:01:30.319 --> 0:01:35.880 behind the testicles, cut the circulation to keep the blood. 0:01:35.880 --> 0:01:40.640 And it's like, I mean, it used to be. It 0:01:40.760 --> 0:01:43.280 used to be, uh like they used to use cock rings. 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:46.960 But being the fact that a span because a spandage 0:01:47.000 --> 0:01:49.480 worked good on your knee even when you're running, so 0:01:49.600 --> 0:01:52.680 it works even better, is that dangerous? So I mean 0:01:52.680 --> 0:01:54.720 it's painful. It could be painful for a while, but 0:01:54.760 --> 0:01:57.000 I mean, you you release it in it, you know, 0:01:58.280 --> 0:02:01.040 let it breathe. Can you get like Gang Green or 0:02:01.080 --> 0:02:03.160 something from that? Yes, you could, but I mean you know, 0:02:03.320 --> 0:02:04.920 I mean you by that time, you're gonna be in 0:02:04.920 --> 0:02:06.880 a lot of pain. You're being a lot of pain 0:02:06.920 --> 0:02:10.120 from doing that. Now, previously, a lot of my friends 0:02:10.120 --> 0:02:11.880 had the mill stippers. A lot of them are gay. 0:02:12.000 --> 0:02:15.120 A lot of mill shippers gay. Now I think it 0:02:15.200 --> 0:02:16.799 is I think there was a time when it was 0:02:16.840 --> 0:02:21.639 a real separation between gay strippers and and straight strippers. 0:02:21.919 --> 0:02:25.320 I know when I did it, we separated the different stats. 0:02:25.360 --> 0:02:28.160 Stigma was always there. So when I was kind of 0:02:28.160 --> 0:02:30.560 in the game. I always kind of we always kept 0:02:30.600 --> 0:02:33.240 it separate because we were trying to kill that stigma. 0:02:33.800 --> 0:02:36.480 Now it's it's like it's kind of a free for 0:02:36.600 --> 0:02:39.440 all guys. I mean, you get guys who even considered 0:02:39.480 --> 0:02:43.160 themselves straight. They do they do gay shows, straight shows. 0:02:43.200 --> 0:02:45.600 It's whatever, Like I'm straight, but for the sake of 0:02:45.639 --> 0:02:47.760 this show and this money, I'm gonna be gay. But yeah, 0:02:47.800 --> 0:02:50.040 but it's it's a funny thing because it's the slope. 0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:53.360 It's a slippery slope because now you've got guys touching 0:02:53.360 --> 0:02:55.880 you and stuff, and it makes it easier to you know, 0:02:55.960 --> 0:02:59.079 I know this guy who is he claims he's completely 0:02:59.120 --> 0:03:03.040 out of role. He's straight and he does gay porn. Yeah, 0:03:03.080 --> 0:03:07.200 I don't, you know, so he gets no, he's sucking 0:03:07.320 --> 0:03:10.000 the ass people in the ass. He doesn't get fun 0:03:10.240 --> 0:03:13.440 because you're not gay. If you're the one that's getting 0:03:13.440 --> 0:03:15.280 your dick suck or you're the one sucking a girl, 0:03:15.280 --> 0:03:19.560 you're still gay. Still good, you're gay, it's still good. 0:03:19.800 --> 0:03:21.560 I think, you know, they're trying to find these little 0:03:21.560 --> 0:03:25.359 classifications of to justify I actually I slept. I used 0:03:25.400 --> 0:03:30.640 to date a call girl for a while and date 0:03:30.919 --> 0:03:34.239 call girl, and she she she kind of fell in 0:03:34.320 --> 0:03:37.200 love with me, and she had decided that because she 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:38.960 fell in love with me, that I we would only 0:03:39.000 --> 0:03:42.440 have anal sex because to her, anal sex was personal 0:03:42.920 --> 0:03:46.440 and vaginal sex was business and so but she all 0:03:46.480 --> 0:03:50.800 that was was a compartmentalization of what she thought was 0:03:51.200 --> 0:03:53.320 in her own head, like, this is personal, this is 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:57.120 not Did you enjoy having anal sex with her? Only? Um, 0:03:57.200 --> 0:03:59.160 I think you get to the point where anything you want, 0:03:59.400 --> 0:04:01.400 you want some We'll see too, you know what I mean. 0:04:01.480 --> 0:04:04.120 So it's a it's kind of a weird. Oh God, 0:04:04.160 --> 0:04:06.520 I wish I could have anal sex and just like, oh, 0:04:06.560 --> 0:04:12.400 this is sup personal right at sex? I get it 0:04:12.480 --> 0:04:16.200 because because you could get pregnant from that, I'm surprised 0:04:16.200 --> 0:04:18.719 that you I can't take it in there. I'm really 0:04:18.960 --> 0:04:24.279 I'm so disappointed myself. I love watching women take it 0:04:24.279 --> 0:04:27.760 in the ass. I think it's the sexiest. Yeah, and 0:04:27.839 --> 0:04:31.160 it's so I'm like, I'm so not into anything. I'm 0:04:31.240 --> 0:04:34.640 in my butt either neither. I don't like now they 0:04:34.640 --> 0:04:36.880 have this new thing eat the booty like groceries. I 0:04:36.920 --> 0:04:39.760 think it's the stupidest thing ever. Don't don't try to 0:04:39.800 --> 0:04:42.360 lick my asshole if you're gonna go down there suck 0:04:42.520 --> 0:04:47.800 my clips, my booty. Well, I mean, clearly, it's funny 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:50.760 thing that if you you talk to anal, do you 0:04:50.760 --> 0:04:52.440 know to get anal one of the things that you 0:04:52.560 --> 0:04:55.520 do is you you lick somebody's ass. I mean that 0:04:55.560 --> 0:04:59.880 it's what preps fell. The best anal sex was not 0:05:00.080 --> 0:05:03.599 with lubricant. The best anal sex I've ever had because 0:05:03.640 --> 0:05:08.920 I've had anal sex that I've enjoyed. Okay, get that. 0:05:10.240 --> 0:05:13.160 My son's father, I had anal sex that I enjoyed. 0:05:13.240 --> 0:05:15.080 Me and my son's father haven't been together for almost 0:05:15.080 --> 0:05:19.160 three years, but the only anal sex that I've ever 0:05:19.279 --> 0:05:22.920 enjoyed was with natural lubricant. Spit Well, yeah, I mean, 0:05:22.920 --> 0:05:26.280 you gotta makes it weird inside of my body, like 0:05:26.360 --> 0:05:29.240 in my eyes. It's like like there's a there's a 0:05:29.279 --> 0:05:31.880 few moves, there's a fused moves that and they make 0:05:31.920 --> 0:05:36.960 some loves that have kind of like a nestization. Well, 0:05:37.040 --> 0:05:39.400 there's this one loop just really good. It's called pure 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:42.919 p ju r E. And they also make an anal 0:05:43.000 --> 0:05:47.640 loupe with that has like you text me that it 0:05:47.720 --> 0:05:52.600 actually has a like uh it's uh like a novocaine, 0:05:52.680 --> 0:05:58.359 like a form of novocan. There's a couple of different 0:05:58.400 --> 0:06:00.040 You got to use a condom. You should have to 0:06:00.360 --> 0:06:02.120 if we need a numb your asks you shouldn't know 0:06:02.160 --> 0:06:06.560 because doesn't enough the man's dick. Well, ultimately the number 0:06:06.720 --> 0:06:09.880 happens initially and then it kinds of weird, kind of weird. 0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:14.920 But there's other there's like the same company she tasted 0:06:14.960 --> 0:06:16.760 in the assid She's like, girl, you gotta use this 0:06:16.800 --> 0:06:18.680 anal eat ship, but you gotta use a condom. And 0:06:18.720 --> 0:06:21.120 I'm like, I'm in a relationship. We don't use condoms. God, 0:06:21.400 --> 0:06:23.640 but don't take my advice. You should use condoms even 0:06:23.680 --> 0:06:26.160 if you're in a relationship. Use condoms all the time. 0:06:26.320 --> 0:06:29.040 Keep your soft, protective share. It's fine. Does anybody we 0:06:29.120 --> 0:06:33.800 have like go get tested with your partner? Yeah? Absolutely, Line, 0:06:33.839 --> 0:06:36.920 you did not go go tests. I did your life, Stephanie. 0:06:36.960 --> 0:06:41.240 I could tell I'm not liar. You tested with your man, 0:06:41.400 --> 0:06:43.039 like before you date a guy and then before you 0:06:43.040 --> 0:06:44.400 take the kind of off You're like, come on, let's 0:06:44.400 --> 0:06:47.760 go get tested on. No, But every time I go, 0:06:49.040 --> 0:06:50.440 I haven't done it all the time. But yeah, I 0:06:50.440 --> 0:06:52.839 have done it no, but as well every time and 0:06:52.839 --> 0:06:54.360 my man fight, I get, I go and get an 0:06:54.440 --> 0:06:57.920 STD test. That's different. That's because I'm like Nick, Nick, 0:06:58.080 --> 0:07:00.000 what you better make sure I don't got not because 0:07:00.240 --> 0:07:07.080 cut you out. It's always good. I'm you know, it's 0:07:07.120 --> 0:07:10.880 funny when you know people. The thing about anal sex 0:07:10.960 --> 0:07:13.680 is that I think it's a really personal thing and 0:07:13.720 --> 0:07:15.720 it's a it's a trust issue because the guy can 0:07:15.800 --> 0:07:18.840 hurt you. So there's a trust and a kind of 0:07:18.880 --> 0:07:21.640 an intimacy issue that needs to be necessary for you 0:07:21.680 --> 0:07:23.640 to even get that. So if a guy like I've 0:07:23.680 --> 0:07:26.120 been with girls where I've you know, where I've went 0:07:26.200 --> 0:07:29.520 down on them and i've I've I've ate their ass 0:07:29.560 --> 0:07:31.760 and played when they played with the fingers and and 0:07:31.800 --> 0:07:34.000 then it starts to open up and where they're hot, 0:07:34.040 --> 0:07:35.680 where they're going, I won't give it to me and 0:07:35.680 --> 0:07:38.200 then I will go. But you I think as a man, 0:07:38.280 --> 0:07:40.320 I mean and this is kind of what my podcast 0:07:40.360 --> 0:07:42.680 is about. It. It's the base on the show. Well 0:07:42.720 --> 0:07:47.920 it's a it's about yeah, I guess uh, it's about 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:50.040 the credibility of men. I think that a lot of 0:07:50.040 --> 0:07:51.520 times you get you get a lot of brothers who 0:07:51.520 --> 0:07:54.680 are growing up with single parents, don't have don't have fathers, 0:07:54.880 --> 0:07:56.880 and they don't have fathers that are teaching them how 0:07:56.920 --> 0:07:59.800 to be men. So the credibility of a man that 0:08:00.080 --> 0:08:03.880 the trust issue of where this woman feels as though 0:08:03.960 --> 0:08:07.240 she can let this guy, you know, take her to 0:08:07.280 --> 0:08:09.280 the point where she can have anal sex and it 0:08:09.360 --> 0:08:13.120 becomes and and even to understand maybe if she's not ready, 0:08:13.640 --> 0:08:17.240 you know, so if a guy you're not ready, to 0:08:17.280 --> 0:08:19.160 say this for all the guys out there, if I 0:08:19.320 --> 0:08:20.760 let you have anal sex and means because you have 0:08:20.760 --> 0:08:29.280 a small penis the only way I'm having anal sexy. 0:08:29.320 --> 0:08:32.079 If your penis is like pretty small, then maybe I'll 0:08:32.120 --> 0:08:35.800 try it. But I'm not doing that with everything A 0:08:35.960 --> 0:08:40.439 total opposite the biggest. No, honestly, I'm a total opposite 0:08:40.440 --> 0:08:45.040 the biggest. I want the biggest every time I want that, 0:08:45.200 --> 0:08:47.120 Like when I get a guy with a big dick. 0:08:47.200 --> 0:08:49.319 I want to fund me in my ass so bad, 0:08:49.400 --> 0:09:00.120 but it never works. It's too much I'll take. Now, 0:09:00.200 --> 0:09:02.160 let's switch directions a little bit, because I was having 0:09:02.200 --> 0:09:04.360 a conversation with one of my friends and she was 0:09:04.400 --> 0:09:07.880 saying that her boyfriend wants them to have a joint account. Okay, 0:09:07.920 --> 0:09:11.240 they're not married, they're not like that. But what do 0:09:11.280 --> 0:09:14.720 you think about being in a relationship, because finances are 0:09:14.720 --> 0:09:16.960 the number one reason that people get divorced to break up. 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:19.000 What do you think about being in a relationship and 0:09:19.040 --> 0:09:21.120 having a joint account. I think you can have a 0:09:21.160 --> 0:09:23.280 joint account as long as he has his own separate 0:09:23.320 --> 0:09:25.720 account and she has her separate account as well, Like 0:09:25.760 --> 0:09:27.920 if they're living together and they have and they've decided 0:09:27.960 --> 0:09:29.240 to do that. I mean, I think it's a great 0:09:29.280 --> 0:09:31.559 way to trust. You don't you don't have to put 0:09:31.600 --> 0:09:38.120 your whole life so, but I mean it's a good way. 0:09:38.320 --> 0:09:40.240 It's a good way to to kind of build that 0:09:40.400 --> 0:09:42.920 trust in the first place, is that, Okay, we have 0:09:43.120 --> 0:09:45.880 these funds and we're spending these funds, and we can 0:09:45.920 --> 0:09:49.600 see how somebody responds or how they don't respond to 0:09:49.760 --> 0:09:51.679 having these funds in there. So if you you know, 0:09:51.880 --> 0:09:53.360 if you got you got funds in there, you have 0:09:53.440 --> 0:09:55.400 this joint account, and then every time it's a new 0:09:55.640 --> 0:09:57.400 she got a new pair of shoes, and the bills 0:09:57.440 --> 0:09:59.839 ain't paid, I mean, then it shows you. It kind 0:09:59.840 --> 0:10:01.720 of gives you an idea of where you're at. The front. 0:10:01.720 --> 0:10:04.560 I'm more thinking, like the guy is gonna take all 0:10:04.559 --> 0:10:08.400 your money out for me. I mean, I don't want 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:10.920 to join account. Even if you can match me, I 0:10:10.960 --> 0:10:13.920 still don't want to join account. Keep your money where 0:10:13.920 --> 0:10:15.920 it's supposed to be in your bank account, and I'll 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:18.360 keep mine. What if he's worth sixty million. If he's 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:21.360 worth sixty million, aunt, I don't think a motherfucker with 0:10:21.520 --> 0:10:23.600 sixty million in the bank is gonna want to have 0:10:23.600 --> 0:10:27.679 a joint account. I mean probably not. The only men 0:10:27.760 --> 0:10:31.000 who want a joint account with their girls or guys 0:10:31.000 --> 0:10:34.079 who are in the struggle, you know what I mean. Well, 0:10:34.120 --> 0:10:36.439 I mean you're not gonna have a joint account with me. 0:10:36.640 --> 0:10:39.080 I work so hard to make this money, you can't. 0:10:39.080 --> 0:10:41.240 I'm not sharing it with you. I'm sharing want child. Yeah, 0:10:42.559 --> 0:10:45.560 that's different. Kind of the funny things, like the base 0:10:45.640 --> 0:10:49.040 for the show is about making dudes more credible so 0:10:49.080 --> 0:10:54.199 that you don't so he's not trying to spy? Are 0:10:54.200 --> 0:10:56.240 you going to have a joint account as hard as 0:10:56.240 --> 0:10:58.000 you work, are you gonna have a joint account with someone? 0:10:58.080 --> 0:11:03.800 Never have? No for what Angela, unless we're like, unless 0:11:03.800 --> 0:11:05.920 we're married, I don't I would have a journy. This 0:11:05.960 --> 0:11:08.199 is why I would have a joining account. Like if 0:11:08.240 --> 0:11:10.640 we go on vacation twice a year and oh yeah 0:11:10.720 --> 0:11:15.160 we could, we could put ours in every month. That's 0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:18.120 so cute. I didn't even think of that. That's really 0:11:18.120 --> 0:11:23.800 cute right there. That's scared. What if you break up? 0:11:23.800 --> 0:11:25.400 What if you like get sick of the guy and 0:11:25.400 --> 0:11:27.080 then you're like, funk, we have this joint you just 0:11:27.120 --> 0:11:31.160 take the money out and you break My thing is 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:33.760 if you're with a guy that you that you really 0:11:33.800 --> 0:11:36.080 don't that you really don't know to the point where 0:11:36.080 --> 0:11:38.199 you're worried about whether or I's gonna steal your money, 0:11:38.440 --> 0:11:40.440 that's probably a guy you shouldn't be with. No. But 0:11:40.480 --> 0:11:42.160 what Angela said is that you know you have a 0:11:42.240 --> 0:11:46.080 joint account because you're planning something. You know that's cute. 0:11:46.760 --> 0:11:48.880 I think that's cute, Like old babe, let's let's plan 0:11:48.960 --> 0:11:51.400 this vacation to go on. I mean, I don't want 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:53.320 to be with anybody that I have to plan for 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:56.320 a vacation six months I had, but I do have 0:11:56.360 --> 0:11:58.160 to plan for stefan advanced because I don't have off 0:11:58.160 --> 0:12:00.360 from work like that, so I know, like have this 0:12:00.400 --> 0:12:03.120 week off exactly. Girl said, you want to be able 0:12:03.160 --> 0:12:05.760 to book your flight like two days before, like, oh shit, 0:12:05.880 --> 0:12:08.760 I got three days off. I had I'm not gonna 0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:12.240 like now, Dante, you were saying that, Um, you were 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:15.840 saying that it's okay if you have a separate account, 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:17.480 and then you had this like I have my account, 0:12:17.520 --> 0:12:19.319 you have your account, and then we have a joint account, 0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:21.640 and that this way we can kind of build the 0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:25.520 trust by how we handle that account. I mean, I mean, 0:12:25.559 --> 0:12:27.600 if you're thinking about somebody, like you really trying to 0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:30.600 rock with somebody, I mean, that kind of trust is 0:12:30.640 --> 0:12:33.640 not built in a moment. It's built with time, and 0:12:33.679 --> 0:12:36.640 so just as well as sex and everything else, you 0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:39.920 build that trust with time. You get your joint account, 0:12:40.080 --> 0:12:44.240 you get your anales, you just build it up and 0:12:45.520 --> 0:12:49.240 then it's I mean, but I think it's it's the 0:12:49.280 --> 0:12:52.600 trust element of it. I think, you know. My thing 0:12:52.679 --> 0:12:55.240 is is I find dudes are so weak, Like I 0:12:55.320 --> 0:12:58.800 find dudes it's just so weak in turns. Yeah, and 0:12:58.840 --> 0:13:00.840 it's it's and I think it has a lot to 0:13:00.840 --> 0:13:03.240 do with the whole feminist movement and how and I 0:13:03.240 --> 0:13:05.480 don't mean in feminist movement in terms of equal pay 0:13:05.960 --> 0:13:08.600 and and maternity leaving stuff. But I'm saying that the 0:13:08.640 --> 0:13:12.319 images of men are weak. It's it's always some dude 0:13:12.600 --> 0:13:15.680 on TV begging to get a blow job or asking 0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:17.720 for permission or so on and so futh and I 0:13:17.760 --> 0:13:21.920 think that what's happening is you have this this I'm 0:13:21.960 --> 0:13:26.040 a strong woman because guys are so weak, right, So, 0:13:26.600 --> 0:13:33.160 I mean it's like so many of my past relationships, 0:13:33.000 --> 0:13:39.120 it's like the dude, right. And that's why now I 0:13:39.120 --> 0:13:41.840 think I don't I don't care how strong a woman is. 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:44.840 In my and my experience is that when you start 0:13:44.880 --> 0:13:48.439 to show those alpha male tendencies and you show that 0:13:48.480 --> 0:13:51.720 you are the man, a woman becomes a woman. All 0:13:51.760 --> 0:13:53.839 she really wants to be. She she wants to let 0:13:53.880 --> 0:13:57.480 us do drive. But it's it's not about taking the control. 0:13:57.720 --> 0:14:00.480 It's about showing how credible you are so that a 0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:03.959 woman relinquishes the control. It's like this dude got me. 0:14:04.240 --> 0:14:07.640 It's hard for us. I mean, I think it's easy 0:14:07.679 --> 0:14:10.960 when a guy shows you that he's capable of that 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:15.720 or that he's worthy of that control. All right, how 0:14:15.760 --> 0:14:17.760 many dates do you go on and let the guy 0:14:17.840 --> 0:14:21.640 pay before you offer, or like try to split or 0:14:21.760 --> 0:14:24.560 what like, here's the thing with that, I'm kind of 0:14:24.560 --> 0:14:27.480 a dude. I kind of always pay. I mean, it's 0:14:27.600 --> 0:14:31.200 nice for somebody to to offer, but that's it's just 0:14:31.320 --> 0:14:34.200 what I do. But it's nice to know that. Yeah, No, 0:14:34.400 --> 0:14:37.200 I don't think that there's a number of dates. I 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:40.440 feel like you go, you go and you hang out 0:14:40.480 --> 0:14:43.520 with a guy, you let him pay for everything, and 0:14:43.560 --> 0:14:46.680 then you know you hit him up that you surprise 0:14:46.760 --> 0:14:49.000 him that one night, like maybe it's on me tonight, 0:14:49.040 --> 0:14:55.640 and it's when when do you do it? That's what 0:14:55.680 --> 0:14:59.040 I'm saying. I don't want to emasculate. I don't I 0:14:59.080 --> 0:15:01.640 don't think scalating him. And I think if you if 0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:04.280 you're offering a lot of times a guy won't let 0:15:04.320 --> 0:15:07.160 you do it anyway. They never like what if you wait? 0:15:07.200 --> 0:15:08.840 What if you make way more money than he does. 0:15:10.120 --> 0:15:12.320 I think it's still a situation. If you want you 0:15:12.360 --> 0:15:14.160 want to play in the major leagues, you're gonna play 0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:16.360 in the major leagues. And if not, I mean, I 0:15:16.360 --> 0:15:18.920 think it's agree with with a lot of money you 0:15:18.920 --> 0:15:21.920 gotta pay. It's also reasonable to say, listen, I'm really 0:15:21.960 --> 0:15:23.640 dig you, But I don't really have it like that 0:15:23.880 --> 0:15:26.400 and you can do other things. And I think if 0:15:26.440 --> 0:15:30.960 she's really a down at stick, at least this dude, 0:15:30.960 --> 0:15:36.760 this is straight up dude. But if well, you probably 0:15:39.720 --> 0:15:42.280 I think I think it's cute. You know, like you 0:15:42.440 --> 0:15:44.320 just be like, are you're surprised. I'm like, oh no, 0:15:44.400 --> 0:15:46.360 I'm gonna pay it tonight. I I've just got paid, 0:15:47.000 --> 0:15:52.360 and he's gonna be like, oh, girls, I'm gonna If 0:15:52.400 --> 0:15:54.240 I like, you go out with a guy and then 0:15:54.360 --> 0:15:57.240 you offered the pain and he actually lets you see, 0:15:57.280 --> 0:15:59.440 that's another problem. What if I do that ship and 0:15:59.480 --> 0:16:07.680 then I'm like, okay, different, you know, don't ask for 0:16:07.720 --> 0:16:10.600 something if I think that's something. If you don't want it, 0:16:11.440 --> 0:16:14.120 there's a level of sincerity. If you got this guy 0:16:14.160 --> 0:16:16.440 and he's down, he's been down for you, and he's 0:16:16.440 --> 0:16:19.840 he's allowing you to relinq with you know, you're you're like, yo, 0:16:19.920 --> 0:16:23.000 this is a cool, dude, I'm relinquishing this control. And 0:16:23.040 --> 0:16:25.880 then you feel like, man, I just want to do something. 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:29.360 Then you do it from since from the sincerity, I 0:16:29.400 --> 0:16:32.520 think that wanted to like pull out my wallet and 0:16:33.960 --> 0:16:36.680 but I'm like, yeah, but did you? But I think 0:16:36.720 --> 0:16:41.920 if you feel it, I'll do it. I'm not playing. 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:44.560 I mean, it's I think it's a weird kind of thing. 0:16:44.600 --> 0:16:47.240 I think I'm a woman a lot of times becomes 0:16:47.240 --> 0:16:50.400 a reflection of the man that she's sucking. So absolutely 0:16:51.360 --> 0:16:53.600 all the time. If if if a chicken is acting 0:16:53.600 --> 0:16:55.560 like a bit just because her dude is a pussy 0:16:56.040 --> 0:16:59.160 and so if she's calling him motherfucker, you ain't ship 0:16:59.280 --> 0:17:01.760 and this is because she's allowing that. I mean, if 0:17:01.840 --> 0:17:04.400 I if I'm taking out somebody for the first day 0:17:04.400 --> 0:17:07.280 and you and you go silly asked, motherfucker, I go, 0:17:07.359 --> 0:17:10.720 wait a minute, listen, I don't really funk like that, Like, 0:17:10.800 --> 0:17:15.200 don't talk to me like that, because it's that can 0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:19.880 only escalate to something. This is a whole like that. Yeah, 0:17:19.920 --> 0:17:25.480 but men like that, but this is a whole well 0:17:25.560 --> 0:17:27.439 in general. I mean, I wouldn't care what it is. 0:17:27.480 --> 0:17:29.280 I mean, I think you have to start to set 0:17:29.320 --> 0:17:33.600 these boundaries up front, because if she's calling you that now, 0:17:33.840 --> 0:17:37.359 then she'll be calling you something else later. But you 0:17:37.400 --> 0:17:39.840 know what I'm just saying. I mean, even if it's 0:17:39.880 --> 0:17:42.720 in like, oh, you're silly asked motherfucker, even if it's playful, 0:17:43.000 --> 0:17:47.600 I go listen. Honestly, I feel like, if you're in 0:17:47.640 --> 0:17:51.320 a relationship and your man allows you to talk down 0:17:51.359 --> 0:17:56.000 on him or vice versa, right, you guys aren't in 0:17:56.160 --> 0:17:58.640 even right. My friend, one of my friends, talk so 0:17:58.760 --> 0:18:00.720 crazy to this guy that she dates, and he talks 0:18:00.720 --> 0:18:02.800 so crazy back to her, and then like, you know, 0:18:02.920 --> 0:18:05.200 you guys like you talk like that to him, and 0:18:05.240 --> 0:18:06.639 then you get man, many touch like that to you, 0:18:06.680 --> 0:18:08.680 but you talk like that to him. Super Honestly, I 0:18:08.720 --> 0:18:11.320 would never be okay with a man who lets me 0:18:11.400 --> 0:18:14.080 call him a bit chass nigga. I would never call him. 0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:16.600 I would never be okay with that. Do you. I 0:18:16.640 --> 0:18:19.760 feel like I'm a woman at the end of the day, 0:18:19.920 --> 0:18:22.480 and no matter how strong and independent I am, I 0:18:22.560 --> 0:18:26.320 do really well for myself. But a man is a man, 0:18:26.800 --> 0:18:30.159 is a man is a man, and you have to 0:18:30.240 --> 0:18:33.439 submit to your man as a woman. I mean, I 0:18:33.480 --> 0:18:36.600 don't think that a man should disrespect you, but you 0:18:36.680 --> 0:18:39.600 can't be disrespecting a man like he's a little girl. 0:18:39.920 --> 0:18:42.240 But I think they're there are guys who are acting 0:18:42.280 --> 0:18:47.080 like little girls who kind of know that's true. And 0:18:47.160 --> 0:18:49.960 I'm not saying that that's necessarily the way to handle it, 0:18:50.000 --> 0:18:51.959 but I'm saying what I'm saying no, if a man 0:18:52.080 --> 0:18:55.520 is as you're gonna get treated like. That's always the case. 0:18:55.600 --> 0:18:58.080 But I think one of the things is because in time, 0:18:58.240 --> 0:19:02.000 like with relationships and feminism and all relationship all this stuff, 0:19:02.040 --> 0:19:05.520 we look at it because we were still animals and 0:19:05.560 --> 0:19:10.600 there are still these instinctual drives underneath everything. So when 0:19:10.600 --> 0:19:12.680 a woman finds like you can say I like a 0:19:12.760 --> 0:19:14.320 dude like this, and I like to do with that, 0:19:14.359 --> 0:19:15.600 and I want this car and I want him to 0:19:15.640 --> 0:19:18.040 look like this. But you you don't know what you want. 0:19:18.040 --> 0:19:22.080 Your pussy does. Your pussy tells you I like this dude. 0:19:22.320 --> 0:19:27.440 So it's a very kind of visceral thing that happens. So, 0:19:28.880 --> 0:19:34.280 but there's a there's an there's kind of this instinctual 0:19:34.440 --> 0:19:37.520 drive that that makes you feel that and and that 0:19:37.680 --> 0:19:41.119 drive seeps through what I call the social contract. The 0:19:41.160 --> 0:19:44.600 social contract, fidelity, monogamy, marriage, all of those things that 0:19:44.640 --> 0:19:47.760 we created on a cognitive level. But if you don't 0:19:47.760 --> 0:19:52.399 take into consideration that this that these things exist, that 0:19:52.480 --> 0:19:55.479 all that thought that attraction is, it's it comes from 0:19:55.520 --> 0:19:58.880 an attraction of a guy who gives off that energy 0:19:58.920 --> 0:20:01.840 that makes you feel safe. I totally agree with you 0:20:01.880 --> 0:20:04.600 because when a guy gives me the energy that he's 0:20:04.640 --> 0:20:12.240 a sucker, I treat him like a sun. It's an 0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:14.080 interesting thing, and so I think, and a lot of 0:20:14.080 --> 0:20:18.600 times guys don't really even understand what there's. There's subtle 0:20:18.680 --> 0:20:21.879 things that tell you that this dude is really not 0:20:22.040 --> 0:20:24.639 credible that makes you shake up and go, wow, this 0:20:24.720 --> 0:20:27.120 dude is really not credible, and you go and then 0:20:27.160 --> 0:20:29.320 you don't even know. And a lot of times dudes 0:20:29.480 --> 0:20:31.680 be like you know, you get guys like they are 0:20:31.760 --> 0:20:34.040 this bitch, that this bitch, that this bitching. But the 0:20:34.080 --> 0:20:37.120 reality is that you're bringing that out, You're giving off 0:20:37.160 --> 0:20:40.840 this feminine energy, and she's rejecting it because you're not 0:20:40.920 --> 0:20:45.080 making her feel safe. Feeling safe is a super important thing. 0:20:45.280 --> 0:20:49.920 No I feel. I feel that. But for me, it's 0:20:50.040 --> 0:20:53.760 like like you said, we are animals and we have 0:20:53.960 --> 0:20:57.040 instincts like you. You You can't smell, you can't tell it, 0:20:57.240 --> 0:21:01.400 you don't know it, but from all are very important. 0:21:01.560 --> 0:21:05.120 You smell it on people. And when a man lets 0:21:05.119 --> 0:21:07.119 you treat him like a bit, you're gonna treat him 0:21:07.160 --> 0:21:08.960 like a bit. It's it's there's a lot of things. 0:21:08.960 --> 0:21:15.040 I mean, it's body language, this language, and a woman. 0:21:15.520 --> 0:21:18.160 As a woman, you want to be independent, you want 0:21:18.160 --> 0:21:21.720 to do things on your own and always of course, 0:21:22.240 --> 0:21:24.280 but you want to submit to you a man, you 0:21:24.320 --> 0:21:27.000 want to be safe, you want to feel protected, you 0:21:27.040 --> 0:21:29.680 know what I mean. So if you are going on 0:21:29.880 --> 0:21:37.119 disrespecting him, it's because you get that vibe. That's so 0:21:37.280 --> 0:21:38.760 what can a guy do to give you the vibe 0:21:38.760 --> 0:21:43.240 that he's a bit by acting like a bit? Like examples, 0:21:43.680 --> 0:21:48.440 I think crying in front of well, you know what, yeah, 0:21:48.520 --> 0:21:51.119 I think even that if you've got a really hard dude, 0:21:51.640 --> 0:21:54.639 does it happen to me? And then you instantly thought 0:21:54.720 --> 0:21:58.080 that this guy was a bit because he cried. Well, 0:21:58.200 --> 0:22:02.720 I just couldn't after that, Now was it? This was 0:22:02.760 --> 0:22:06.280 the crying in the content because he didn't know what 0:22:06.320 --> 0:22:07.879 to do with his life. It was like really, but 0:22:08.000 --> 0:22:12.200 see that's a different thing. See the decisiveness of man, 0:22:12.840 --> 0:22:18.080 the decisiveness of men. Yeah, it was not that long. 0:22:19.040 --> 0:22:22.040 But it's like she loves her young boy. I think 0:22:22.080 --> 0:22:26.560 the decisiveness of man is is attractive. Like if you 0:22:26.680 --> 0:22:29.159 if somebody says, if you go you want to go 0:22:29.240 --> 0:22:30.760 out to eat, and you go, yeah, well you want 0:22:30.760 --> 0:22:33.840 to go? Well, it's like listen, get your clothes on, 0:22:33.920 --> 0:22:37.639 let's go. I like somebody to take and nothing me too. 0:22:37.880 --> 0:22:41.600 I like to be submissed. Drive where a guy is taking. 0:22:43.080 --> 0:22:44.679 You know, you know what I feel like. I'm a 0:22:44.720 --> 0:22:48.640 really powerful woman. I you know, I've I've been independent 0:22:48.680 --> 0:22:52.280 for a very long time, like I have a whole story. Yes, 0:22:52.400 --> 0:22:54.600 of course I do like to get slapped and show 0:22:54.720 --> 0:23:01.120 a lot. But oh, we know, you know, as as 0:23:01.119 --> 0:23:03.640 strong as you know, as a as a woman myself. 0:23:03.760 --> 0:23:06.359 You know, at the end of the day, I'm a girl, 0:23:06.560 --> 0:23:09.120 I am a woman. I'm I'm a little baby. I'm 0:23:09.160 --> 0:23:13.639 a little woman baby. Yes, I am baby. And I 0:23:13.640 --> 0:23:16.600 want to get treated as No, I want to get 0:23:16.600 --> 0:23:19.520 treated as such. And I want I want my man 0:23:19.600 --> 0:23:21.399 to be able to protect me. I want him to 0:23:21.400 --> 0:23:24.320 be more powerful than me. If I disrespect my man, 0:23:24.480 --> 0:23:27.280 I need there to be consequences. I need to not 0:23:27.800 --> 0:23:30.520 want to disrespect my man. Somebody said I was gonna 0:23:30.560 --> 0:23:32.720 make you a man. She's saying she's speaking the truth. 0:23:32.840 --> 0:23:36.640 It's really it's it really is that kind of visceral thing. Right, 0:23:36.640 --> 0:23:39.639 I'm right. No, you're absolutely right. Ye're absolutely right. But woman, 0:23:39.720 --> 0:23:42.720 but even I think you know a lot of young dudes, Well, 0:23:42.840 --> 0:23:45.800 they don't even pick up the keys and the cues 0:23:45.920 --> 0:23:49.399 when they're having sex. Like so for Mrance, you know, 0:23:49.440 --> 0:23:52.600 I even teach teach this, like say, girl, the girl 0:23:52.680 --> 0:23:54.760 is mission every style right, if she's missing everything I 0:23:54.840 --> 0:23:57.640 like mentioned everybody way, I like that, and her her 0:23:57.720 --> 0:24:00.880 hips relaxed, Like if the the joints in her hips 0:24:00.880 --> 0:24:03.680 relax and her legs fall back, she wants you deeper. 0:24:04.000 --> 0:24:07.000 That is the signal to know she's deeper. If she's 0:24:07.040 --> 0:24:10.480 pressing those those hamstrings against the funt of your legs, 0:24:10.840 --> 0:24:13.320 you're too deep. Now, you can't be like I'm a 0:24:13.400 --> 0:24:16.240 tear this pussy up and she's she's wincing and she's 0:24:16.280 --> 0:24:19.480 pushing you away because you're too deep. That's not what 0:24:19.840 --> 0:24:22.960 having sex. You're supposed to check these cues if you 0:24:23.040 --> 0:24:24.760 go down on. One of the things that I tell 0:24:24.840 --> 0:24:28.760 dudes all the time is watch a woman's diaphragm, Watch 0:24:28.840 --> 0:24:34.199 how her diaphragm, her watch her breathing, the depth of 0:24:34.240 --> 0:24:36.680 her breathing. And so when you're doing the right thing, 0:24:37.240 --> 0:24:40.840 you'll her breathing will get deeper, She'll breathe deeper. And 0:24:42.280 --> 0:24:45.960 those little clues and studies are not even aware of that. 0:24:46.000 --> 0:24:48.560 They don't even get the fact that you should be 0:24:48.600 --> 0:24:51.239 picking up these clues and somebody's going down on me 0:24:51.280 --> 0:24:53.440 and it's going great, and then they switch it up. 0:24:53.760 --> 0:25:00.560 Oh my god, no, no, but that's because but you 0:25:00.640 --> 0:25:04.479 gotta tell him doing it and the rhythm is STAPs 0:25:05.359 --> 0:25:09.280 whom as let me, let me ask you something, but 0:25:09.400 --> 0:25:13.440 it's not about to come anymore. Like, like you said, 0:25:13.560 --> 0:25:15.520 you'd like to get choked. But the worst thing in 0:25:15.560 --> 0:25:17.840 the world is to have a dude that you got 0:25:17.840 --> 0:25:20.359 to tell him to choke you, or tell a dude 0:25:20.400 --> 0:25:24.320 that you gotta want So if he's not if he's 0:25:24.400 --> 0:25:28.000 not listening to these cues and he's not watching and 0:25:28.080 --> 0:25:30.560 paying attention, because he's really just like how can you 0:25:31.640 --> 0:25:35.800 because you can put his hands on your neck telling him. No, 0:25:36.400 --> 0:25:37.920 you don't even have to do that. I mean, look, 0:25:37.960 --> 0:25:41.320 if he's what if he really doesn't want to, you know, like, no, 0:25:41.440 --> 0:25:44.000 I'm telling have guys that I'll be like, babe, pull 0:25:44.119 --> 0:25:48.200 my hair, choke me, and I'm like, no, you should 0:25:48.240 --> 0:25:51.720 tell him, man, exactly what you went great if you're 0:25:51.760 --> 0:25:54.560 comfortable with what is better than being with a guy 0:25:54.640 --> 0:25:59.159 who anticipates what your needs are before you've even conceptualized 0:25:59.200 --> 0:26:03.760 what those needs are. Your psychic It's like he's stepping step. 0:26:04.000 --> 0:26:06.240 He's a stepping So if even if I'm may love 0:26:06.320 --> 0:26:09.199 to somebody and I will I might run, I might 0:26:09.280 --> 0:26:12.000 run my hands to your hair, and then I will 0:26:12.000 --> 0:26:15.840 cover your throat. I'll cover your throat and see where 0:26:15.840 --> 0:26:18.840 your head is out. And I might get terrified right now, 0:26:19.640 --> 0:26:26.560 but maybe it maybe it could be a gentle cover. 0:26:26.680 --> 0:26:29.200 But I'm gonna cover your throat and see where you're 0:26:29.200 --> 0:26:32.119 at with that. Now if if, if you if I 0:26:32.160 --> 0:26:34.760 cover your throat and you throw your head back, and 0:26:34.800 --> 0:26:36.639 then I might go a little if it gets a 0:26:36.640 --> 0:26:39.280 little wetter, You're like, okay, So I mean I think 0:26:39.359 --> 0:26:42.320 you have to. So the sex should be even the 0:26:42.359 --> 0:26:44.480 first few times, the sex should be this kind of 0:26:44.880 --> 0:26:48.600 as a guy, you should be exploring these things that 0:26:48.760 --> 0:26:51.240 you know if she's into this, if you go to 0:26:51.280 --> 0:26:52.959 the bat, I mean, you know, guys will pull her hair, 0:26:53.119 --> 0:26:54.760 but you don't pull her hair from the bottom of 0:26:54.800 --> 0:26:59.960 the hair. You know, you go up the bat. It's 0:27:00.080 --> 0:27:03.440 is something that man needs to learn. You don't pull 0:27:03.520 --> 0:27:07.920 the hair from the end of it. You go fucking crazy, 0:27:08.080 --> 0:27:12.480 Like what the fun you put the hand on the 0:27:12.600 --> 0:27:18.240 scalp and and a nice little tuge wrap the roots 0:27:18.280 --> 0:27:21.960 and then and then you see where is it? And 0:27:21.960 --> 0:27:23.840 then if you I think if you, when you see, 0:27:23.880 --> 0:27:27.600 then you push further and you gotta see where you 0:27:27.600 --> 0:27:30.280 gotta go from there where she's at now. I mean 0:27:30.359 --> 0:27:32.680 you you can escalate and then there comes a time 0:27:32.720 --> 0:27:36.800 where you you'll feel that if it's too much, a 0:27:36.840 --> 0:27:40.080 woman will kind of genuineflect about wow, that's and then 0:27:40.119 --> 0:27:43.480 you know the back down because I'd be like, oh no, no, no. 0:27:43.640 --> 0:27:47.000 Listen to my boyfriend, my boyfriend, my boyfriend like he 0:27:47.280 --> 0:27:50.200 listened to me that my current boyfriend, like he knows 0:27:50.280 --> 0:27:52.639 exactly how to touch me. He knows exactly how to 0:27:52.960 --> 0:27:56.919 be rough or be gentle. And I've asked him about it, 0:27:56.960 --> 0:27:58.760 like Babe, have you ever done that to other girls? 0:27:58.800 --> 0:28:06.000 And he's like yeah, we oh cooking. But you know 0:28:06.040 --> 0:28:08.280 what the same thing for guys know what to do 0:28:08.680 --> 0:28:10.399 because I have friends tell me that you got to 0:28:10.400 --> 0:28:12.600 try things with guys instead of asking them about certain 0:28:12.640 --> 0:28:17.080 things like stick a finger in his asshole, want him 0:28:17.800 --> 0:28:20.040 no guys going to ask you for what men want 0:28:20.040 --> 0:28:22.439 to finger and they asked they do a little nudge. 0:28:22.640 --> 0:28:24.480 They want you to put it like you're sucking their 0:28:24.520 --> 0:28:26.200 dick and you got your hand there and they're like 0:28:26.359 --> 0:28:32.359 the next thing. Some guys like once like you no, 0:28:32.600 --> 0:28:35.400 like this one ax that I had, like like when 0:28:35.440 --> 0:28:37.920 I touched his balls a lot. So then my next 0:28:37.960 --> 0:28:41.640 boyfriend I went to touch his ball, he fucking freaked 0:28:41.640 --> 0:28:45.080 out like oh, and I was like fragile, like he 0:28:45.160 --> 0:28:52.600 acted like I just almost like you was crazy. Women. 0:28:52.800 --> 0:29:04.080 You know, some women to touch balls? How do some grabbed? 0:29:04.080 --> 0:29:08.720 I like them hold. Some guys don't want to, and 0:29:08.760 --> 0:29:11.400 that's fine, but I mean it's still a situation where 0:29:11.840 --> 0:29:15.240 you have to try. You gotta, you have to try 0:29:15.320 --> 0:29:18.720 these things, and it's kind of this exploration. I think. 0:29:19.080 --> 0:29:22.000 What another thing is it is getting lost is the 0:29:22.040 --> 0:29:25.200 intimacy of it, the intent A lot of times that 0:29:25.320 --> 0:29:28.920 you know, it's guys going through the motions. This is 0:29:28.920 --> 0:29:31.040 what I did with my last chick, this is what 0:29:31.080 --> 0:29:35.160 I'm doing with you, instead of understanding, okay, here's this 0:29:35.240 --> 0:29:37.760 is this is what I know how to do. Let 0:29:37.800 --> 0:29:39.880 me try this, let me try that, let me and 0:29:39.920 --> 0:29:43.600 then taking a sort of a mental uh note, Okay, 0:29:43.600 --> 0:29:45.720 she likes this, she doesn't like this, She likes it rough. 0:29:45.800 --> 0:29:48.600 She likes this, so you take and then every time 0:29:48.640 --> 0:29:51.080 you make love to her, you if you're picking up 0:29:51.120 --> 0:29:54.800 more and more information about her, so the sex gets better. 0:29:55.440 --> 0:29:59.040 So you're constantly and you have to have That's why 0:29:59.480 --> 0:30:04.200 every sex, not even only sex relationships, it's all about communication. 0:30:04.280 --> 0:30:06.400 You have to get to know each other. That's why 0:30:06.560 --> 0:30:09.719 people who are who are just meeting each other and 0:30:09.760 --> 0:30:13.200 then throwing their legs up or sticking their dick out. 0:30:13.360 --> 0:30:16.680 It never works. You can't have a really good experience 0:30:16.720 --> 0:30:19.840 because you guys are not communicating and it's hard, and 0:30:20.000 --> 0:30:22.400 like for one night stands or that kind of thing, 0:30:22.440 --> 0:30:24.360 It's like, how can you even have good sex when 0:30:24.360 --> 0:30:28.800 you don't even know you don't know each other. I mean, 0:30:28.840 --> 0:30:30.760 I don't think it ever happens. I mean, there's no 0:30:30.880 --> 0:30:33.240 way that if I suck you today and I suck 0:30:33.280 --> 0:30:36.080 you ten times from now, ten times, when it's gonna 0:30:36.080 --> 0:30:39.040 be ways open and it was the first time because 0:30:39.520 --> 0:30:42.320 there's a level of comfort, there's a level of intomy's intimacy, 0:30:42.360 --> 0:30:45.040 and I think the intent is something that I would 0:30:45.080 --> 0:30:48.920 I've been experimenting with myself as the intent. So I 0:30:48.960 --> 0:30:51.600 think sometimes a guy will kiss you because he wants 0:30:51.640 --> 0:30:53.200 to grab your tists. He will grab your tist because 0:30:53.200 --> 0:30:56.320 he wants to suck you, when if he just thought 0:30:56.800 --> 0:31:01.680 the kiss is the most important thing, like being present 0:31:02.320 --> 0:31:05.240 in that kiss with your lips are pressed up and 0:31:05.240 --> 0:31:09.640 there's a moisture, lips slight instead of the next being 0:31:09.680 --> 0:31:12.840 in that moment and if that kiss is the only 0:31:12.960 --> 0:31:16.240 thing that he gets this kind of sexual satisfaction from 0:31:16.240 --> 0:31:20.560 the from the intent of making this kiss, as if 0:31:20.600 --> 0:31:22.680 this is the best kiss I'm ever gonna give, this 0:31:22.720 --> 0:31:26.360 is the last kiss, So being in that moment. Are 0:31:26.400 --> 0:31:28.520 there times and people just aren't good at things though, 0:31:28.640 --> 0:31:30.800 no matter what, Like you could like somebody a lot, 0:31:30.880 --> 0:31:32.840 have been with him a long time, but for some reason, 0:31:33.360 --> 0:31:35.800 they just don't just not get get at it. No. 0:31:36.240 --> 0:31:40.480 And for me, you know, like somebody might be so 0:31:40.640 --> 0:31:44.560 good at somebody as something to someone and then to 0:31:44.680 --> 0:31:48.760 the next person. There's but I think you can practice, 0:31:48.800 --> 0:31:50.880 and I think you can communicate, and I think if 0:31:50.920 --> 0:31:53.000 you start to you under I think what you have 0:31:53.080 --> 0:31:56.720 to get good at is reading the cues. And for me, 0:31:56.920 --> 0:32:00.800 relationships are all about chemistry, you know what I mean? 0:32:00.840 --> 0:32:03.520 If if you like like you were, you were just 0:32:03.560 --> 0:32:07.200 talking about it. A kiss is so important, like if 0:32:07.280 --> 0:32:11.400 you it's it's for me, it's the most important things. 0:32:11.520 --> 0:32:14.080 Some pole than kissing is more intimate than sex, much 0:32:14.160 --> 0:32:17.880 more intimate than I don't know that. Yeah, yeah that's true. 0:32:18.800 --> 0:32:21.960 But for me, like if you don't match, if your 0:32:22.000 --> 0:32:26.400 mouth don't match, it's a waste of time. Well, you know, 0:32:26.600 --> 0:32:28.720 because you gotta be able to breathe someone in. You 0:32:28.760 --> 0:32:31.280 gotta be able to take in their breath, and you know, 0:32:31.640 --> 0:32:34.600 to kiss something and feel it. You know what I 0:32:35.280 --> 0:32:37.720 think you have. You know, it's like when you there 0:32:37.800 --> 0:32:39.600 used to be a game used to play when you're 0:32:39.640 --> 0:32:45.280 a kid, and you like, yeah, yeah, But I think 0:32:45.960 --> 0:32:48.280 what's funny is I think like I said that the 0:32:48.320 --> 0:32:50.120 first thing I said was a man, a woman is 0:32:50.120 --> 0:32:52.600 a reflection of the guy she's with, and so when 0:32:52.600 --> 0:32:55.880 he's intimate and when he's at present in the moment 0:32:55.920 --> 0:32:59.960 and he's present with every act, she will be present 0:33:00.680 --> 0:33:04.600 in every act. Right, So I think you know, I mean, 0:33:04.800 --> 0:33:06.440 guys will kill me for this, but I said, any 0:33:06.440 --> 0:33:09.840 time a relationship doesn't work, it's it's the guy's fault 0:33:10.240 --> 0:33:16.560 because a woman attaches herself of course, because he's the 0:33:18.280 --> 0:33:21.360 here's here's the thing, if if, if I you know, 0:33:21.480 --> 0:33:23.800 I have this thing called the coffee cup theory. Like 0:33:23.840 --> 0:33:25.200 you know, you go to a diner, you get a 0:33:25.200 --> 0:33:28.240 coffee cup, and then the little the little dude runs around. 0:33:28.280 --> 0:33:30.800 If your coffee cup is empty, right, the dude fills 0:33:30.880 --> 0:33:33.840 up your coffee cup. So me, as your man, I'm 0:33:33.880 --> 0:33:36.560 supposed to make sure your coffee cup is full. So 0:33:36.600 --> 0:33:39.360 when the next dude comes around, he goes, oh, oh, 0:33:39.520 --> 0:33:42.720 now you're good. Your cup is already full. So I 0:33:42.720 --> 0:33:48.120 can use a little cream. Now, well I didn't. But 0:33:48.200 --> 0:33:50.960 if it's if it's full, if it's full, you gotta 0:33:51.000 --> 0:33:52.840 pull some of the coffee. You have to put the cream. 0:33:52.880 --> 0:33:54.680 And you know what you feel what I'm saying, it's 0:33:55.720 --> 0:33:58.360 it's this is this is what guys are not doing. 0:33:58.360 --> 0:34:01.400 They're not understanding that they have to read these cues 0:34:01.440 --> 0:34:06.000 and fulfill these needs and and the same contents set boundaries. 0:34:06.280 --> 0:34:08.880 Be strong enough so that you're credible enough, dude, that 0:34:08.920 --> 0:34:11.920 a woman could relinquish the control and give you that 0:34:12.040 --> 0:34:16.040 control and still but still be able to cultivate her 0:34:16.080 --> 0:34:19.400 in her own kind of artistic endeavors, and and so 0:34:19.480 --> 0:34:22.560 that she can grow as a woman. But she's still 0:34:22.640 --> 0:34:24.960 because she has that foundation and everything is good at 0:34:25.000 --> 0:34:27.960 home and this dude's got her back. And when it's 0:34:28.000 --> 0:34:30.200 all crazy and she feels crazy, like oh, I don't 0:34:30.200 --> 0:34:31.920 know what to do, this is crazy, he's gonna be 0:34:31.960 --> 0:34:37.560 able to you know, lay down, let me rub your ass. 0:34:35.520 --> 0:34:41.440 That good at home. That's when women cheat, right, Absolutely, 0:34:43.320 --> 0:34:47.799 women what happened. But I think that I think what 0:34:47.920 --> 0:34:51.359 happens is a lot of times. Um, it's a lot 0:34:51.360 --> 0:34:54.759 of times women are selling guys what they want to 0:34:54.800 --> 0:34:57.040 sell them instead of what they want. You know what 0:34:57.080 --> 0:35:00.120 I'm saying, like the I'm sucking you when I'm this 0:35:00.200 --> 0:35:03.319 and I'm not and I'm I'm that's not necessarily what 0:35:03.400 --> 0:35:06.280 he wants. So I think you have to tap into 0:35:06.360 --> 0:35:09.080 what he wants to keep it. But I mean, I 0:35:08.719 --> 0:35:13.720 I I personally believe that when the guy is on point, 0:35:14.680 --> 0:35:17.759 I've never seen a woman, no matter how crazy she is. 0:35:17.800 --> 0:35:20.719 But what do you mean what I'm saying is this 0:35:20.800 --> 0:35:24.200 dude like I you know, there's been even times when 0:35:24.200 --> 0:35:29.120 I've had multiple partners, right, well, I've had you know, 0:35:29.719 --> 0:35:32.280 but I know your bra siyes, I know your panty size, 0:35:32.440 --> 0:35:36.279 I know your shoes size, I know I know what 0:35:36.320 --> 0:35:38.839 food you like. I know that you know. I mean, 0:35:38.960 --> 0:35:43.200 you have to be this dude who's an extraordinary dude 0:35:43.719 --> 0:35:47.040 that where you're you're tuned into into the moment of 0:35:47.080 --> 0:35:49.680 who this woman is and what her needs are, not 0:35:49.719 --> 0:35:52.279 necessarily what her wants are, but what her needs is, 0:35:52.440 --> 0:35:54.759 what her needs, what her weaknesses are, what or not? 0:35:54.840 --> 0:35:58.040 And you gotta be listening because women talk, y'all talk 0:35:59.239 --> 0:36:06.280 everything talk, so fud problem is that dudes are not listening. 0:36:06.680 --> 0:36:09.760 They're not listening to what you're saying, and not necessary 0:36:09.840 --> 0:36:12.680 specifically what you're saying. But but you have to look 0:36:12.719 --> 0:36:15.280 at what the undertone of what a woman is talking. 0:36:16.280 --> 0:36:19.880 Does every man cheat? I think a lot of guys do, 0:36:19.920 --> 0:36:21.719 but I don't think you have to. I don't get 0:36:21.920 --> 0:36:28.279 every man. If you if you're aware of that? No, no, no, no, 0:36:28.280 --> 0:36:36.239 no nine eight percent eight Do you know why I say? 0:36:37.320 --> 0:36:39.160 I feel like no, you know what, I don't know 0:36:39.239 --> 0:36:41.880 the percent. I don't know that she made it up, 0:36:41.920 --> 0:36:44.759 but I made it up. I just breathed out it. 0:36:45.200 --> 0:36:48.640 But listen to me. Let no wait. I think that 0:36:48.680 --> 0:36:54.480 a man will cheat according to his opportunities. If if you, 0:36:54.640 --> 0:36:56.279 if you, if you take it care of your man. 0:36:56.320 --> 0:37:03.839 You're keeping him at home everything truck him in sad. Now, 0:37:04.680 --> 0:37:08.320 if your man is in the strip club all the tom, hey, girlfriend, 0:37:08.360 --> 0:37:12.759 he might be cheating. Great, well you don't like you're 0:37:12.840 --> 0:37:15.879 right there. You'll see guys do different things in terms 0:37:15.920 --> 0:37:23.080 of this opportunities opportunities excuse me if if you know, 0:37:23.400 --> 0:37:26.320 but I mean, yeah, like that's the problem with dating 0:37:26.320 --> 0:37:31.560 men and entertainment. Men and entertainment. It's entertainment. You know 0:37:31.600 --> 0:37:37.120 what those doctors they say, doctors are high on the list. Okay, 0:37:37.160 --> 0:37:41.080 let's say in the airport. Then at the airport, men 0:37:41.080 --> 0:37:45.759 in the airport cheat percent of the time. Men we're 0:37:45.800 --> 0:37:48.239 going to cheat. Okay, Well, man who works in the 0:37:48.840 --> 0:37:53.239 cheat with a girl who needs the milk. Lu's right here. 0:37:55.400 --> 0:37:58.000 I mean I think it's both ways. I think one 0:37:58.000 --> 0:38:01.040 of the things about women is is they're attraction to 0:38:01.160 --> 0:38:04.799 men is such an emotional thing. Like the minute she 0:38:04.880 --> 0:38:08.200 don't minute a woman When a minute you've shown yourself 0:38:08.239 --> 0:38:11.480 to be this bitch and she decided that you're a bit. 0:38:11.680 --> 0:38:14.879 It's it's a wrap. There's no loyalty, does nothing that Look, 0:38:14.960 --> 0:38:17.280 I don't feel you like that's like what you said. 0:38:17.600 --> 0:38:19.800 I saw this dude cry and then I don't know, 0:38:20.880 --> 0:38:23.360 it depends on what he cries about. This was just 0:38:23.400 --> 0:38:28.600 like an unnecessary like cry, like you're just tearious and 0:38:29.000 --> 0:38:34.399 it's like one slow might be like I love one 0:38:34.960 --> 0:38:39.319 like I love, not like a couple of tears and 0:38:39.360 --> 0:38:43.120 like whining and like crying. I'm like watching the news 0:38:43.160 --> 0:38:48.320 and something. Listen to me. I'm a woman. I cry. 0:38:48.680 --> 0:38:52.759 I cry for the commercial with the cats and the 0:38:52.840 --> 0:38:56.600 dogs over there. It's like, what if he does if 0:38:56.719 --> 0:38:59.239 my man cries over the cats and the dogs are 0:38:59.320 --> 0:39:01.399 breaking up with, you gotta get out of my house. 0:39:01.560 --> 0:39:05.120 I don't want to, you know more. I hate my cats. 0:39:06.120 --> 0:39:08.360 I can't. When she said that, when she said the 0:39:08.440 --> 0:39:11.760 dude that cried, it's not that he cried. He cried 0:39:11.920 --> 0:39:16.920 about his life. So he has no direction and you 0:39:17.000 --> 0:39:20.680 don't feel safe with him because he doesn't have any direction. 0:39:20.800 --> 0:39:23.960 And that's what makes that's what it matters. It's too 0:39:24.080 --> 0:39:27.480 bossy to be with a crying ass man. Do you 0:39:27.560 --> 0:39:32.440 think if a guy isn't like coming up with plans, 0:39:32.440 --> 0:39:34.440 like he's just like, we'll do whatever you want, is 0:39:34.480 --> 0:39:37.600 that like not cool? Yeah? I think it's not. I 0:39:37.640 --> 0:39:42.880 don't think that's cool. I think I d back, you know, yeah, 0:39:42.920 --> 0:39:47.320 I mean I think a guy would direction, but he's awesome. 0:39:48.480 --> 0:39:51.160 I mean, but he just wants to do whatever I 0:39:51.200 --> 0:39:56.000 want to do, you know. I think that's the dates 0:39:56.000 --> 0:39:57.680 I've ever been on with guys and guys that I 0:39:57.800 --> 0:40:00.640 dated at people that come up with like, let's try this, rest, 0:40:01.800 --> 0:40:04.160 let's do that. That's the best. I hate when I 0:40:04.200 --> 0:40:07.480 have to come up with everything I ever figure out 0:40:07.480 --> 0:40:12.160 what I want to eat. But you you get tired 0:40:12.640 --> 0:40:14.440 if you've got a guy that's not that has no 0:40:14.520 --> 0:40:19.319 direction and he's not decisive. Eventually that you're you're like, well, 0:40:19.440 --> 0:40:22.120 what the you know what? And then you start to 0:40:22.200 --> 0:40:25.879 feel unsafe. It's it's almost it's almost a visceral kind 0:40:25.880 --> 0:40:28.480 of feeling. It's like an instinctual feeling like why is 0:40:28.520 --> 0:40:30.799 he not he don't have nothing, he don't want to 0:40:30.800 --> 0:40:36.000 do nothing, like what my main thing is that you 0:40:36.040 --> 0:40:41.880 find him less attractive and now it starts to fall apart. Right, 0:40:41.880 --> 0:40:45.480 I agree with that direction and making that It's a 0:40:45.480 --> 0:40:48.640 funny thing. Like I remember, like I was watching Oprah 0:40:48.640 --> 0:40:51.000 one time, right, and Oprah was why she was buying 0:40:51.040 --> 0:40:55.600 a uh like a Labordor retriever right, and Stepman was 0:40:55.640 --> 0:40:58.160 with her right, and so now this is Oprah, fifty 0:40:58.160 --> 0:41:01.200 billion dollar Oprah. So she's looking at them. She's like, 0:41:01.200 --> 0:41:03.399 oh my god, the puppy is so cute. I'm want 0:41:03.400 --> 0:41:07.680 to buy them all right, And Stepman goes, no, you 0:41:07.680 --> 0:41:16.879 can have one, and I'm like, oh, right, you you 0:41:16.920 --> 0:41:19.200 pick one and I'll pick one. But that's it. And 0:41:19.239 --> 0:41:24.319 I was like, this is why she's this dude, you 0:41:24.320 --> 0:41:29.440 can have them all. Oprah could buy all the labornor retrievers, 0:41:29.440 --> 0:41:34.640 put him on an island and call it. And but 0:41:34.880 --> 0:41:37.439 the fact that even in the context of this woman 0:41:37.480 --> 0:41:40.680 who is is mega rich, has a guy who she 0:41:40.840 --> 0:41:43.359 counts on and who she she feels that she can 0:41:43.400 --> 0:41:46.359 go to and confide in and that he's got her back, 0:41:46.920 --> 0:41:51.600 is why she's with you. Nothing. He won't actually he 0:41:51.600 --> 0:41:54.239 won't marry her. And if you think about if you 0:41:54.280 --> 0:41:56.960 really think that, you show me, you show me a 0:41:57.080 --> 0:41:59.719 black woman, you show me an older black woman who 0:41:59.800 --> 0:42:03.520 was telling the world that she doesn't really believe in marriage. 0:42:03.560 --> 0:42:07.640 That's bullshit, like this is an overweight Why stem not 0:42:07.760 --> 0:42:11.200 married because you don't want to? Why I don't know 0:42:11.239 --> 0:42:17.000 about my god? How do we know he doesn't want 0:42:17.000 --> 0:42:20.240 to marry you don't tell me, you tell me over 0:42:21.640 --> 0:42:26.200 me too, don't want that. You tell me a black 0:42:26.239 --> 0:42:29.120 man that don't want to marry the richest woman, a 0:42:29.160 --> 0:42:33.040 black man I don't want you don't want to marry 0:42:33.640 --> 0:42:36.640 forever though exactly. But what I'm saying is that's how 0:42:36.719 --> 0:42:39.359 pimp he is. He's actually got this black woman saying 0:42:39.360 --> 0:42:42.080 I don't really believe in marriage. That's that's when we 0:42:42.120 --> 0:42:48.040 get into I don't about she say, that's a whole absolutely, 0:42:48.440 --> 0:42:51.960 you see, I think you want to believe that. I'm 0:42:52.000 --> 0:42:57.080 not Listen, here's here's you can here's what you cause. 0:42:57.360 --> 0:42:58.760 All you have to do is look at the pictures. 0:42:58.960 --> 0:43:01.000 You look about the picture. When you look at the 0:43:01.000 --> 0:43:05.279 pictures and you see Oprah open, Stepman looks like the man, 0:43:05.360 --> 0:43:08.800 and Oprah looks like the girl. You watch watch Brad 0:43:08.800 --> 0:43:15.400 Pitt got bags, he's too feet behind, he's carrying, she's 0:43:15.400 --> 0:43:23.040 got a bunch of kids, she's he's dragging. I mean, 0:43:23.120 --> 0:43:27.400 Angelina is definitely the Boss's angeline. You can see this. 0:43:27.719 --> 0:43:30.680 You can see that. Yeah, she's open until you put 0:43:30.680 --> 0:43:39.920 a dick in her. Then she's so she is to 0:43:40.080 --> 0:43:43.719 you put a second her I think you and I 0:43:43.800 --> 0:43:49.560 act to get along really well. Jesus. I mean, but 0:43:49.640 --> 0:43:52.080 the credibility of it. I think the credibility of men 0:43:52.160 --> 0:43:54.440 is an important thing, and I think we're losing now. Honestly, 0:43:54.640 --> 0:43:57.719 I agree with you as a woman. As a woman, 0:43:57.800 --> 0:44:00.320 let me tell you something. I do really well for myself. 0:44:00.400 --> 0:44:04.600 I'm very grateful and blessed that I have had opportunities 0:44:04.640 --> 0:44:07.040 to be able to take care of myself and live well. 0:44:08.480 --> 0:44:14.160 But I still feel like my man should be over 0:44:14.280 --> 0:44:16.480 and above me. I should be able to listen to 0:44:16.520 --> 0:44:22.120 my man. And who cares about financially money is green paper? 0:44:22.160 --> 0:44:24.879 Who cares? Nobody cares about money at least I don't. 0:44:24.920 --> 0:44:27.880 I'm sorry at all. No. I mean I want to 0:44:27.880 --> 0:44:31.360 make money, of course everybody. But I do well for myself, 0:44:31.360 --> 0:44:36.160 and I like, no, no, pretty broke, he's got. If 0:44:36.200 --> 0:44:38.640 my man is good to me and he's that's the 0:44:38.640 --> 0:44:40.759 whole thing I'm talking about. If my man is good 0:44:40.800 --> 0:44:43.560 to me and he's broke or he's rich, it doesn't matter. 0:44:44.160 --> 0:44:47.279 I am. I should be as a woman, as a 0:44:47.320 --> 0:44:51.120 girl submissive to my man. But here's you can have 0:44:51.160 --> 0:44:58.239 a rich dude and he's a bit, don't that's a bit. Now. 0:44:58.280 --> 0:45:00.680 If you got a guy who we don't have it 0:45:00.719 --> 0:45:03.040 popping right now, but you believe in him, and this 0:45:03.120 --> 0:45:05.719 kid is working and he's moving and shaking it trying 0:45:05.760 --> 0:45:10.520 to make it happen, because it's that's the safety you 0:45:10.560 --> 0:45:13.680 feel as a woman. Dude, you want to look as 0:45:13.719 --> 0:45:16.320 a woman. Listen, I'm sorry, I don't mean to interrupt 0:45:16.360 --> 0:45:23.359 you as a woman, but as a woman, I want 0:45:23.400 --> 0:45:25.960 my man to be able to protect me. I want 0:45:26.040 --> 0:45:28.480 my man to be able to talk over me, to 0:45:28.600 --> 0:45:31.600 put me in my mother fucking place. But if you're 0:45:31.600 --> 0:45:32.960 in her place, that you can finish saying what you 0:45:33.040 --> 0:45:39.520 were saying. What she's saying is what she's saying is 0:45:39.520 --> 0:45:43.200 the truth. It's it's like, you know, it's that thing 0:45:43.560 --> 0:45:48.480 when you you look, get dressed. It's get dressed, getting 0:45:48.480 --> 0:45:50.959 the car, we're gonna go somewhere. Where are we going, 0:45:51.120 --> 0:45:56.520 and just getting just life. Absolutely So it's not even 0:45:56.560 --> 0:45:59.880 about pimping, because pimping is something you go out and 0:46:00.000 --> 0:46:02.080 the street and you bust it and then you bring 0:46:02.120 --> 0:46:04.440 the money home. It's the same. But that's not what 0:46:04.520 --> 0:46:09.239 I'm doing. I don't get your man money because no 0:46:09.280 --> 0:46:11.880 matter how rich or how broke. My man is, I 0:46:11.920 --> 0:46:13.920 don't need to support him because he's a man and 0:46:13.960 --> 0:46:15.799 he could take care of himself. And if he's not 0:46:15.880 --> 0:46:19.960 supporting himself, then he doesn't have the credibility anywhere. So 0:46:20.360 --> 0:46:22.680 you you want a guy to drive, but you want 0:46:22.680 --> 0:46:26.480 to make sure that he's capable of driving, you know, 0:46:26.560 --> 0:46:29.879 you see, and this is any time I've ever taken 0:46:29.880 --> 0:46:32.960 a check out and we go someplace, go drive, She'll 0:46:33.280 --> 0:46:35.800 get up in the chair folder, you know, like folder 0:46:35.880 --> 0:46:38.480 legs in the chair. It's kind of like it's almost 0:46:38.480 --> 0:46:40.520 this little girl thing that comes where they just sit 0:46:40.600 --> 0:46:42.440 on there like where we going, where we go? And 0:46:43.080 --> 0:46:45.279 but you gotta, as a dude, you gotta be able 0:46:45.320 --> 0:46:47.880 to bring that little girl out of her, like you 0:46:48.000 --> 0:46:52.600 gotta feelsoofy. All right, I'm just gonna chill. My man 0:46:52.800 --> 0:46:57.960 is he's driving, and that the credibility of it's important. 0:46:57.960 --> 0:47:01.400 And how does a guy. I gotta talk to Leah, right, 0:47:02.040 --> 0:47:04.759 what's going on in your head? What do you think? 0:47:04.920 --> 0:47:08.400 Because is like no, I mean, it's just it's different. 0:47:08.600 --> 0:47:11.040 I guess it's like I've just dated such different kinds 0:47:11.080 --> 0:47:14.360 of guys, like maybe because my energy is masculine or something, Right, 0:47:14.440 --> 0:47:17.520 so like too, I always kind of like have taken 0:47:17.600 --> 0:47:20.960 the Marines and like say, what's going down? Is that? 0:47:21.440 --> 0:47:25.920 I feel like we watched the child want I don't know. 0:47:27.120 --> 0:47:29.439 I think like that sounds cool, but like it also 0:47:29.520 --> 0:47:33.400 sounds bossy, like we're going how do I have? Like 0:47:34.640 --> 0:47:40.640 are we gonna be okay? Are we are dying? Like okay, 0:47:40.680 --> 0:47:44.319 we're gonna go get ready? That would be that'd be cool. 0:47:44.560 --> 0:47:46.560 Like there was one instance, like there was this guy 0:47:46.680 --> 0:47:48.880 and he and me and him had kind of had 0:47:48.920 --> 0:47:51.320 similar personalities and it's just like whoa Like it was 0:47:51.640 --> 0:47:53.680 like I need like a yang to my wait wait 0:47:53.719 --> 0:47:58.120 wait wait, I think what I think? It's sometimes a 0:47:58.239 --> 0:48:00.920 good guys who are aggressive, and usually a lot of 0:48:00.960 --> 0:48:04.920 guys who are aggressive are become abusive, and that's the problem. 0:48:05.040 --> 0:48:07.879 That's what the fear is of having an aggressive dude, 0:48:07.880 --> 0:48:10.920 because because he's aggressive, he's abusive, and if he's soft, 0:48:11.200 --> 0:48:14.120 then he's a bit. The real thing is walking the 0:48:14.239 --> 0:48:18.839 tight rope between a guy who is aggressive but he's 0:48:18.840 --> 0:48:25.279 still considerate context of what and somebody has to be 0:48:25.320 --> 0:48:26.759 able to check me when I step out of line 0:48:26.760 --> 0:48:31.520 because you have to do as a woman, you make 0:48:31.600 --> 0:48:37.320 your own money. You do own the house, she owns 0:48:37.360 --> 0:48:40.440 her own car, owns the house, she's not backed up 0:48:40.480 --> 0:48:43.680 on her bills, and Julie is very successful. But I'm 0:48:43.760 --> 0:48:47.479 sure that you want a man to be like, hey, chill, 0:48:48.719 --> 0:48:52.360 don't don't flip out on me because I'm a man, Like, 0:48:53.080 --> 0:48:55.320 don't get too crazy because I also can't let you 0:48:55.560 --> 0:48:58.560 let me talk crazy to you, because after that it's over, 0:48:58.800 --> 0:49:02.320 it's over. I know Angela. Angela was on radio. This 0:49:02.480 --> 0:49:05.520 is what she does. She could cut somebody up all 0:49:05.760 --> 0:49:08.200 probably you know what I'm saying. I mean, you know, 0:49:09.080 --> 0:49:10.799 there's a lot to it. I mean, I think if 0:49:10.880 --> 0:49:12.920 you're if you're if you're intelligent, you want a man 0:49:12.960 --> 0:49:17.640 who's intelligent. Yet radio you're articulate, so you want a 0:49:17.680 --> 0:49:20.000 man who's articulate. But you also want to feel safe. 0:49:20.239 --> 0:49:21.880 You want a guy who can teach you things and 0:49:21.960 --> 0:49:23.719 show you things that you didn't maybe even give you 0:49:23.840 --> 0:49:27.000 a perspective on something that you didn't have before. And 0:49:27.080 --> 0:49:29.799 if you you're going to this well and he's got 0:49:29.960 --> 0:49:33.080 nothing to give you, then and you're better than him. 0:49:33.120 --> 0:49:37.360 A woman never dates a guy who she's better than that. 0:49:37.920 --> 0:49:43.960 Better is not better, it is not. But but that's 0:49:44.000 --> 0:49:50.520 what that's exactly. But that's why they don't last always 0:49:50.600 --> 0:49:58.360 because the ones you said, your relationship relationships last. The 0:49:58.440 --> 0:50:02.239 thing with Leah is that Lena, it is so bossed up. 0:50:02.719 --> 0:50:07.080 Leah is like she she's the man. She is that 0:50:07.440 --> 0:50:10.479 a day, Leah, you do, you do date down Leah 0:50:10.560 --> 0:50:13.320 sometimes know, And that's the thing with Leah is that, 0:50:14.040 --> 0:50:17.759 you know, she she's like looking at these like it's like, yeah, 0:50:17.760 --> 0:50:21.200 all right, you can't beat me. That's sometimes that's that's 0:50:21.320 --> 0:50:25.000 in the context of her and there's nothing wrong with that. 0:50:25.160 --> 0:50:27.719 There's nothing wrong with that. She likes the big dicks. 0:50:27.840 --> 0:50:34.120 That's with the you know, she's her big money bank. 0:50:34.400 --> 0:50:38.360 And you know, you know, Leah is just like, you know, 0:50:38.600 --> 0:50:40.640 like I might date, I'm young, i might date, I'm old. 0:50:40.800 --> 0:50:43.120 At the end of the day, nobody's talking with me. No, 0:50:43.400 --> 0:50:48.879 you gotta do that. Felt I feel a great dick 0:50:48.960 --> 0:50:54.120 pick and I'm just never I mean, well, I mean 0:50:54.200 --> 0:50:58.840 that's the starting point. Good, But you talk with me. 0:50:59.200 --> 0:51:02.080 Is that that's a problem Lia is that the guys 0:51:02.160 --> 0:51:04.839 that she is meeting, they can't really funk with her. 0:51:05.239 --> 0:51:07.600 That's what it is. Well, you know, she treats them 0:51:07.680 --> 0:51:12.080 like the bitch as niggas. But when she does meet, 0:51:12.960 --> 0:51:16.080 when she does meet somebody, when she ultimately does meet 0:51:16.160 --> 0:51:19.080 somebody who can't funk with her, that's when she'll fall 0:51:19.120 --> 0:51:23.440 in love. I'm naughty, She's look really ready because it's 0:51:23.960 --> 0:51:27.279 maybe you aren't really even really aren't trying to find 0:51:27.320 --> 0:51:29.520 the right person by dating all these people that you 0:51:29.600 --> 0:51:33.279 know are the right people. Know, But that's why she 0:51:33.640 --> 0:51:36.520 she I could tell just from her whole demeanor that 0:51:36.640 --> 0:51:41.120 she's not playing no games. She's like, whatever, I might 0:51:41.200 --> 0:51:44.200 get this sex, but you can leave. You know, it's 0:51:44.280 --> 0:51:47.840 weird because you know, like if you ask anybody, do 0:51:47.960 --> 0:51:50.720 you if I as, if I say are you perfect? 0:51:50.800 --> 0:51:55.560 You go, of course not right. But although we understand 0:51:55.600 --> 0:51:58.160 on a cognitive level that nobody's perfect, a lot of 0:51:58.200 --> 0:52:03.800 times we hold ourselves to the standards of perfection. But 0:52:05.719 --> 0:52:08.799 but we hold ourselves to those standards of perfection even 0:52:08.840 --> 0:52:14.239 though we cognitively know that perfection doesn't exist. And if 0:52:14.320 --> 0:52:17.239 we we admit that we're not we're not perfect. What 0:52:17.320 --> 0:52:19.480 does that mean? It means that we make mistakes. And 0:52:19.560 --> 0:52:22.600 if we make mistakes, then we need forgiveness. And if 0:52:22.640 --> 0:52:25.400 we need forgiveness, then you have to give forgiveness. So 0:52:25.520 --> 0:52:27.880 I mean there's always has to be a leeway in 0:52:28.160 --> 0:52:31.560 terms of what you that these are human beings and 0:52:31.640 --> 0:52:34.360 that you're trying to fit together and you you you 0:52:34.520 --> 0:52:38.400 make mistakes, and so that doesn't mean dating out of 0:52:39.000 --> 0:52:41.200 what your needs are. You still have to put your 0:52:41.320 --> 0:52:45.520 needs first. But I'm a firm believer that it is 0:52:45.640 --> 0:52:49.919 the man's job to figure out and anticipate what those 0:52:50.000 --> 0:52:53.440 needs are and to filth fulfill them even before you 0:52:53.640 --> 0:52:57.640 conceptualize what they are in your own head, by listening 0:52:57.680 --> 0:53:00.960 to you. Because in a like, a woman will be 0:53:01.080 --> 0:53:03.560 in an emotional situation where she's this is crazy and 0:53:03.600 --> 0:53:05.719 this is going crazy and and he should be able 0:53:05.719 --> 0:53:08.480 to see through that and and and say, well, this 0:53:08.680 --> 0:53:10.440 is this is what's going on, and this is what 0:53:10.560 --> 0:53:13.400 you need. You know. What's great with guys do if 0:53:13.400 --> 0:53:15.239 you get into an argument or a fight with them 0:53:15.880 --> 0:53:19.400 and instead of them keeping it going, they ended. I 0:53:19.520 --> 0:53:22.880 think that's a great Like, okay, whatever. When somebody stubborn 0:53:22.960 --> 0:53:26.000 with me, me too, I hate that. I like for 0:53:26.080 --> 0:53:28.520 you know, like want to I want you to give 0:53:28.560 --> 0:53:31.239 me your argument. I want to listen, I want to 0:53:31.280 --> 0:53:32.840 hear how you feel. I want to I want to 0:53:32.880 --> 0:53:39.480 get up in your mind. But he's very don't judge me. 0:53:40.800 --> 0:53:44.120 Love it's very funny. But this I know Dator has 0:53:44.160 --> 0:53:46.120 to go because he does stand up comedy. He has 0:53:46.160 --> 0:53:48.600 to go to stand up. Oh my god, that's so cool. Yeah, 0:53:49.080 --> 0:53:52.799 oh my god, I love you. Guys can come out 0:53:52.880 --> 0:53:54.600 and invite you. Guys can come to the show whenever 0:53:54.640 --> 0:53:57.799 you want to come show. Yeah, I enjoyed this conversation 0:53:57.920 --> 0:54:03.680 with you. I'm glad you did. Yeah, ma'ma have. The 0:54:03.719 --> 0:54:06.000 Beige Philip podcast is on Beige Philip dot com. You 0:54:06.040 --> 0:54:10.839 can follow me on Dante twitter at at Dante Narrow 0:54:10.920 --> 0:54:12.920 d A N T E N E r oh. And 0:54:13.040 --> 0:54:16.279 I also do one on one consultations. I do phone consultations. 0:54:16.320 --> 0:54:18.400 That saved me Dante at gmail dot com. If you 0:54:18.560 --> 0:54:23.920 gave me for what what you do? You do consultations 0:54:23.960 --> 0:54:29.040 for a manage? Yeah, definitely help if you have. I 0:54:29.120 --> 0:54:33.520 don't need help. Very It's really interesting too. I find 0:54:33.560 --> 0:54:36.239 that very interesting. I've been doing it for quite a time. 0:54:36.280 --> 0:54:38.399 I used I was doing it for for years. I've 0:54:38.400 --> 0:54:40.360 been doing the podcast for three years, and I was 0:54:40.480 --> 0:54:42.400 the emails that I would get into questions that I 0:54:42.480 --> 0:54:44.960 was getting it just got a little crazy that we 0:54:45.080 --> 0:54:47.080 just started a business. But let me ask you one 0:54:47.160 --> 0:54:49.320 question because a lot of people send me in questions 0:54:50.080 --> 0:54:52.399 and I got to ask you one of them from 0:54:52.480 --> 0:54:55.880 I ask ye because people always want to know the 0:54:55.960 --> 0:55:00.160 one let me get it. Oh no, but I've really 0:55:00.320 --> 0:55:04.239 enjoyed our conversation. I want to I'm gonna subscribe to 0:55:04.320 --> 0:55:06.560 your podcast. I'm gonna listen to it because I like 0:55:06.719 --> 0:55:10.680 to listen to things on a male perspective. Okay, here's when. Okay, 0:55:10.760 --> 0:55:13.560 I'm twenty three. I haven't had too many experiences dating, 0:55:13.560 --> 0:55:15.480 although I've had a couple of friends and benefits and 0:55:15.520 --> 0:55:17.480 realize it's not my thing. Could you give me some 0:55:17.600 --> 0:55:19.920 tips about that? First few weeks are months of getting 0:55:19.960 --> 0:55:22.200 to know someone during the dating process. How often should 0:55:22.200 --> 0:55:24.080 we talk? What are the boundaries? And how do you 0:55:24.160 --> 0:55:26.040 keep them interested in? How do you find out their 0:55:26.080 --> 0:55:28.920 true intentions? Is is what I say to a lot? 0:55:29.040 --> 0:55:33.440 Is this a guy a female? Okay? I think what 0:55:33.640 --> 0:55:35.440 you have to do first and foremost as be the 0:55:35.480 --> 0:55:38.200 best version of yourself. I think a lot of times 0:55:38.280 --> 0:55:41.080 when you have younger women and they're still trying to 0:55:41.160 --> 0:55:43.000 find themselves and trying to they don't really have the 0:55:43.040 --> 0:55:46.120 direction of when you're the best version of yourself, then 0:55:46.200 --> 0:55:48.360 you can be confident about how you put yourself and 0:55:48.640 --> 0:55:51.280 what your needs are. So I think that is first 0:55:51.400 --> 0:55:55.040 and form and foremost when it comes to dating. I think, um, 0:55:56.040 --> 0:55:58.200 I think you have to be a woman can be 0:55:58.280 --> 0:56:00.719 as honest as she wants and and I think she 0:56:00.800 --> 0:56:02.720 has to be as strong as she wants. You can't 0:56:03.200 --> 0:56:06.200 ask a woman to be less strong or less of 0:56:06.360 --> 0:56:10.800 what she is. It's a guy's job to manage that 0:56:11.440 --> 0:56:13.360 and to find out where he fits into that. But 0:56:13.480 --> 0:56:15.400 you know what that said, what I think the biggest 0:56:15.480 --> 0:56:18.960 problem when you're first dating someone in the beginning is 0:56:19.040 --> 0:56:22.200 that you're never your real self. Well, I think that's 0:56:22.200 --> 0:56:28.480 the important I think that my best my for me. 0:56:28.800 --> 0:56:31.400 I don't know if anybody wants advice for me, but 0:56:31.600 --> 0:56:36.320 for me, my best advice is it's just you. You know. 0:56:37.600 --> 0:56:40.560 But if you think yourself, if you're eventually you is 0:56:40.600 --> 0:56:43.359 gonna come at you're the best version of yourself if 0:56:43.400 --> 0:56:45.680 you feel it's the reason why people lie about who 0:56:45.680 --> 0:56:47.560 they are is because they're not really comfortable with who 0:56:47.600 --> 0:56:49.440 they are in the first place. And so if they 0:56:49.560 --> 0:56:52.080 feel that they need to perpetrate as somebody else because 0:56:52.280 --> 0:56:54.560 they're not really comfortable. So when you are the best 0:56:54.680 --> 0:56:58.040 version of yourself, then you can be you because you're 0:56:58.080 --> 0:57:01.439 comfortable with it. So one of the that says, whatever's broke, 0:57:01.520 --> 0:57:05.840 fix it. Whatever you're uncomfortable about, fix that first, you know. 0:57:05.960 --> 0:57:08.040 I mean, I'm not saying you can't date, but even 0:57:08.080 --> 0:57:10.440 if you're in the process of fixing it, if it's 0:57:10.480 --> 0:57:13.839 your weight, if it's your education, if it's your job, 0:57:14.280 --> 0:57:19.880 fix it. Because that's uncomfortable. That will seep into your 0:57:20.040 --> 0:57:23.800 into your brain while you're with somebody else and not uncomfidable. 0:57:23.800 --> 0:57:27.160 That lack of confidence will cause you to lie and 0:57:27.280 --> 0:57:29.960 misrepresent who you are. And I also cause you to 0:57:30.080 --> 0:57:32.880 put up with ship that you wouldn't normally put fix 0:57:33.600 --> 0:57:40.240 Fix it Baby, Thank you so podcast and you can 0:57:40.280 --> 0:57:46.160 also follow him Dante Narrow Back