1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:02,760
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John. We're the ancient

2
00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:06,040
Speaker 1: two case Storytime podcast hosts, and we have some ancient

3
00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:08,160
Speaker 1: wisdom in the stories coming up. If you want to

4
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:11,080
Speaker 1: hear the wisdom from two old heads that know more

5
00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:12,639
Speaker 1: than they know what to do with, you're gonna have

6
00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:15,239
Speaker 1: to wait for a quick message from our sponsors for

7
00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:17,000
Speaker 1: the next two minutes or so.

8
00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:20,040
Speaker 2: My mother in law said I'd ruin her son's life,

9
00:00:20,079 --> 00:00:21,840
Speaker 2: so I banned her from our wedding.

10
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:24,120
Speaker 3: Ah, I'm gonna ruin his life.

11
00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:27,080
Speaker 2: My husband, thirty six male, and I thirty three female,

12
00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:30,480
Speaker 2: have known each other since we were teens, but our

13
00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:34,479
Speaker 2: lives went separate ways until about three years ago when

14
00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:37,280
Speaker 2: I met my husband again. His mother, my mother in law,

15
00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:39,440
Speaker 2: was living with him. I didn't see an issue with this,

16
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,519
Speaker 2: as it's not like he was living with her and

17
00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:46,120
Speaker 2: I could clearly tell he wasn't a mama's boy. In fact,

18
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:48,680
Speaker 2: he disagreed with his mother quite often, but was always

19
00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:50,280
Speaker 2: good about holding his tongue.

20
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:51,080
Speaker 4: And keeping the peace.

21
00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:53,840
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from Safe University eighty three

22
00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:55,640
Speaker 2: twenty three and if you want to submit your own stories,

23
00:00:55,680 --> 00:01:00,320
Speaker 2: go to the rslage Okay Storytime subreddit I'm Sophia, I'm Dakota.

24
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:00,840
Speaker 5: I'm Carly.

25
00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,440
Speaker 2: We are here to give good advice, goofy, but we

26
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:05,520
Speaker 2: don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd do,

27
00:01:05,680 --> 00:01:07,759
Speaker 2: So let us know what you would do in the comments.

28
00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:11,080
Speaker 2: About three months into us seeing each other, my husband

29
00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:14,760
Speaker 2: and his mother got into an argument. She insisted he

30
00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:17,520
Speaker 2: built a privacy fence in his front yard because the

31
00:01:17,560 --> 00:01:22,520
Speaker 2: local troublemakers across the street made her uncomfortable. He refused,

32
00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:25,120
Speaker 2: as not only is it not permitted where we lived

33
00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:28,080
Speaker 2: to do so, but because it was tacky and ridiculous.

34
00:01:28,280 --> 00:01:30,440
Speaker 2: This caused a huge fight, in which he told her

35
00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:32,959
Speaker 2: she had to go, and she promptly moved her things

36
00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:35,520
Speaker 2: out oddly enough, though they were fine the next day,

37
00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:38,320
Speaker 2: and he helped her move her belongings back in. Fast

38
00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:41,399
Speaker 2: forward about six months later, It's Easter twenty twenty four.

39
00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:43,360
Speaker 2: She had us come over to help move things she

40
00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:46,479
Speaker 2: moved again to her second place, since my husband's house.

41
00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:48,960
Speaker 2: While we were there, she asked to give my stepdaughter,

42
00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:52,080
Speaker 2: five years old at the time, her Easter basket she

43
00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:54,320
Speaker 2: had made her. She made all of her grandchildren one

44
00:01:54,320 --> 00:01:57,240
Speaker 2: that year. I myself have three children, of my own

45
00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,440
Speaker 2: thirteen male, twelve female, and eight male. All all four

46
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:02,680
Speaker 2: children were with us. While we were helping her move.

47
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:05,000
Speaker 2: My husband asked her if she had made anything for

48
00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:07,800
Speaker 2: my children, to which she responded no, she didn't think

49
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:09,919
Speaker 2: about them. I told her it was fine, they were

50
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:13,160
Speaker 2: really too old for Easter baskets anyway. She apologized and

51
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,440
Speaker 2: insisted my kids pick out an Easter basket and she'd

52
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,760
Speaker 2: just make more for the other grandchildren. So my kids

53
00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:21,360
Speaker 2: picked a basket and we went about our night. Remember

54
00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:24,600
Speaker 2: this for later. Since my mother in law couldn't afford much,

55
00:02:24,639 --> 00:02:27,400
Speaker 2: she was moving into small apartments and this last place

56
00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:30,000
Speaker 2: was a room in a mansion some guy owns and

57
00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:32,520
Speaker 2: rents the rooms out. She had asked us if she

58
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,520
Speaker 2: could store some things at our house that she just

59
00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:36,360
Speaker 2: didn't want to get rid of but didn't have the

60
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,960
Speaker 2: space for. My husband had just moved into my home

61
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,080
Speaker 2: not long before this. I owned a house in the

62
00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:44,400
Speaker 2: country on five acres. My children and I were already

63
00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:47,000
Speaker 2: trying to adjust to having him and my stepdaughter in

64
00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:50,720
Speaker 2: our space along with their belongings, but I agreed to

65
00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:53,360
Speaker 2: let her store her things until she was able to

66
00:02:53,400 --> 00:02:55,000
Speaker 2: find other storage options.

67
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,400
Speaker 4: I gave her six months.

68
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,680
Speaker 2: At this time, my husband and I had just gotten

69
00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:01,440
Speaker 2: engaged and my storage in my garage was being prepared

70
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:03,919
Speaker 2: to be used for a wedding prep and towards a

71
00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:06,799
Speaker 2: six month mark, I started asking my husband to speak

72
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:09,480
Speaker 2: with his mother about her things, as I was running

73
00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,920
Speaker 2: out of space to store wedding things. He agreed, and

74
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:15,799
Speaker 2: did message her periodically about it. She'd always say she'd

75
00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:19,280
Speaker 2: come over and wouldn't, or my favorite, she's scared of

76
00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:22,040
Speaker 2: my dog. I told her I'd keep him locked in

77
00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:24,760
Speaker 2: his kennel the entire time. So finally I reached out

78
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:26,560
Speaker 2: to my mother in law and asked if she'd like

79
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,280
Speaker 2: me to help her get the items posted on Facebook

80
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:32,120
Speaker 2: marketplace and sell them since she clearly had gone this

81
00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:35,080
Speaker 2: long without the items. She agreed, and I told her

82
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:36,920
Speaker 2: she was welcome to come out and help me price

83
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,960
Speaker 2: items and go through everything. She always had an excuse

84
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:43,040
Speaker 2: for not coming out. One day, I messaged her and

85
00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:45,480
Speaker 2: told her I'd price the items and get them placed

86
00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:46,080
Speaker 2: online for her.

87
00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:47,120
Speaker 4: She agreed.

88
00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:49,960
Speaker 2: I started going through items, and honestly, most of it

89
00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:53,280
Speaker 2: was items that required a specific buyer for Big Bucks,

90
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:57,720
Speaker 2: crystal ware, decorative plates, de core et cetera. The furniture

91
00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:01,000
Speaker 2: was pretty much junk and except for one decent chest

92
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:04,240
Speaker 2: of drawers and a decorative dessert cart. I began to

93
00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:07,040
Speaker 2: list the items to sell. Things began to sell, but

94
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,640
Speaker 2: then we got a call from my mother in law.

95
00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,960
Speaker 2: She was not happy with the pricing. She didn't have

96
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,760
Speaker 2: a Facebook, but my husband's youngest sister was telling their

97
00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:18,120
Speaker 2: mother what I was listing things for. Well, yes, I

98
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:22,000
Speaker 2: was pricing things low. It was not unreasonable for the circumstances.

99
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:24,400
Speaker 2: I had given her six months and it had been

100
00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:26,719
Speaker 2: eight months at this point. I gave her the option

101
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,880
Speaker 2: to help me price things, and I wanted this stuff

102
00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,640
Speaker 2: out of my storage. I told her things were already sold,

103
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:33,919
Speaker 2: that she wanted the prices changed on and if she

104
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,120
Speaker 2: wanted those higher price tacts, she should have come.

105
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,320
Speaker 4: Gotten her stuff or help me.

106
00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:39,520
Speaker 2: I explained to her that the majority of what she

107
00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:41,680
Speaker 2: had required the right buyer to get the money she

108
00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:43,760
Speaker 2: was asking for. I was not there to be her

109
00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,840
Speaker 2: personal eBay, and I didn't have time and needed this

110
00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:49,839
Speaker 2: space for our wedding. We found out a few days

111
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:52,200
Speaker 2: later that the place she lives has a storage shed

112
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,039
Speaker 2: in the backyard for each room and resident in the mansion.

113
00:04:55,240 --> 00:04:58,120
Speaker 2: So she had somewhere this whole time for her stuff.

114
00:04:58,360 --> 00:04:59,360
Speaker 4: Where does she live?

115
00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:01,440
Speaker 3: What is this mysterious?

116
00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:03,239
Speaker 4: What do you mean she lives in a mansion?

117
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:04,200
Speaker 3: Is it haunted?

118
00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:05,840
Speaker 6: You know? What? Does she live with?

119
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:06,679
Speaker 3: Eddie Murphy?

120
00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:10,560
Speaker 4: No, she lives with Professor X. Is that what's his name?

121
00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:11,559
Speaker 4: The X Men mansion?

122
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,120
Speaker 6: Oh, Charles Xavier?

123
00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:13,360
Speaker 7: Yeah?

124
00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:16,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, Okay, you made me think I was wrong. I

125
00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:16,760
Speaker 5: was not.

126
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:18,720
Speaker 3: I mean, I guess Professor X.

127
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,479
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, he's official.

128
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:23,000
Speaker 3: But you made me think of Chemical X from the

129
00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:26,240
Speaker 3: Powerpuff Girls, So I was like, that's not the name

130
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:27,000
Speaker 3: of the god.

131
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,360
Speaker 4: No, I was thinking she lives in the X Men mentioned,

132
00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:33,360
Speaker 4: and she's like, yeah, I have some really weird roommates.

133
00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,720
Speaker 2: Nothing else much was said, and she got what little

134
00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:38,479
Speaker 2: money was made from what would sell, and the rest

135
00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:41,200
Speaker 2: went to the dump. This was all in late August

136
00:05:41,279 --> 00:05:44,440
Speaker 2: twenty twenty four. Thanksgiving twenty twenty four rolls around and

137
00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:47,400
Speaker 2: it's mine and my kid's first Thanksgiving with my husband's

138
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:49,640
Speaker 2: whole family. My mother in law wanted a picture of

139
00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:52,359
Speaker 2: all of her grandchildren, since they were all finally in

140
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,839
Speaker 2: one place at one time. My husband asked if we

141
00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:57,400
Speaker 2: could get a second photo that included my three children

142
00:05:57,520 --> 00:06:00,120
Speaker 2: as well as for him. She scoffed, and, needless to say,

143
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:03,360
Speaker 2: no pictures were taken. Later that night, my husband received

144
00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:05,520
Speaker 2: a text from my mother in law. He wouldn't tell

145
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,560
Speaker 2: me what it said. He just said that she was

146
00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:10,360
Speaker 2: no longer invited to the wedding and that he would

147
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:10,920
Speaker 2: have no.

148
00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:11,880
Speaker 4: Contact with her.

149
00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:13,640
Speaker 3: Whoo that escalated.

150
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:16,640
Speaker 2: I was baffled, but trusted my husband. If it was

151
00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:19,800
Speaker 2: something he didn't even want to share with me, I

152
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,360
Speaker 2: knew it had to have been bad. As the days

153
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:25,320
Speaker 2: went by, I couldn't stop thinking about what that text

154
00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:29,000
Speaker 2: could have said to make my husband completely uninvited her

155
00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,240
Speaker 2: from our wedding and cut all contact.

156
00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:34,560
Speaker 3: I have an idea, I have maybe an idea. I

157
00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:36,800
Speaker 3: bet she'd had something to do with you and your kids.

158
00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:38,400
Speaker 4: I think so, and he.

159
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,359
Speaker 3: Said poof goodbye.

160
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:43,640
Speaker 2: Well, she was honestly a ball of hatred and over

161
00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:44,839
Speaker 2: stimulated nerves.

162
00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:46,559
Speaker 4: It was still his mother.

163
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:49,400
Speaker 2: I finally sat my husband down and asked to read

164
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:52,159
Speaker 2: her message. He agreed to let me, but warned me

165
00:06:52,440 --> 00:06:55,200
Speaker 2: prior to doing so that it was nasty and not

166
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:57,320
Speaker 2: to let any of it get to me. After reading

167
00:06:57,360 --> 00:07:00,800
Speaker 2: the message. I set his phone down and looked at him.

168
00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,800
Speaker 2: I told him I appreciated for sticking up for not

169
00:07:03,839 --> 00:07:06,680
Speaker 2: only me but my kids, and I fully backed him

170
00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:09,320
Speaker 2: if you chose no contact with her. In her message,

171
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,880
Speaker 2: she told him that I would ruin his life and

172
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:15,280
Speaker 2: be the biggest mistake of his life. I was horrible

173
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:18,520
Speaker 2: and he'd regret it, something along the lines of my

174
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:21,840
Speaker 2: kids being horrible children. She hardly interacted with my kids ever,

175
00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:24,920
Speaker 2: and that she'd never consider them her grandkids.

176
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:31,760
Speaker 3: Well, problem, they'll never consider you their grandma because you're

177
00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:32,800
Speaker 3: not gonna be around.

178
00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:35,720
Speaker 2: She didn't want them in the Thanksgiving photo and that

179
00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,600
Speaker 2: just ruined our Thanksgiving. She also mentioned how my children

180
00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:41,400
Speaker 2: and I ruined Easter for her too, because she shouldn't

181
00:07:41,440 --> 00:07:43,640
Speaker 2: have to make things for my kids since they aren't

182
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,160
Speaker 2: her grandkids.

183
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:45,320
Speaker 4: And never would be.

184
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,240
Speaker 2: I can see maybe why she'd be upset with me

185
00:07:48,320 --> 00:07:51,800
Speaker 2: over her stuff in my storage, but my kids, they're kids.

186
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:54,200
Speaker 5: They literally have never done anything.

187
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:54,400
Speaker 4: To her though.

188
00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:56,720
Speaker 2: After I read the text message my mother in law

189
00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:59,480
Speaker 2: sent my husband after Thanksgiving, my husband and I had

190
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:03,560
Speaker 2: a conversation about his relationship with his mother. Basically, her

191
00:08:03,600 --> 00:08:07,360
Speaker 2: behavior was nothing new to him or his family. She

192
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:11,360
Speaker 2: has had issues with my sister in law's significant others

193
00:08:11,480 --> 00:08:14,200
Speaker 2: and brother in law's significant others. It's not the first

194
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,000
Speaker 2: time one of her children have cut her off due

195
00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:21,240
Speaker 2: to her behavior, uncalled for statements, wild hatred for almost

196
00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:26,880
Speaker 2: everything and everyone, unsolicited advice, and just pure lack of tact. However,

197
00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,160
Speaker 2: it hit him different this time, he said, and was

198
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,280
Speaker 2: directed towards him Specifically, I was the woman he was

199
00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:34,320
Speaker 2: in love with and going to spend the rest of

200
00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:37,240
Speaker 2: his life with. My children are his children, and he

201
00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:40,079
Speaker 2: was absolutely not going to budge on this one.

202
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:40,680
Speaker 4: This time.

203
00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:44,000
Speaker 2: I agreed and supported him, obviously, because she brought my

204
00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:47,120
Speaker 2: children into it. She kind of ignited a little mama fire.

205
00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:49,520
Speaker 2: So I did tell my husband that for me to

206
00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:52,120
Speaker 2: forgive her and us be any part of her life,

207
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:55,160
Speaker 2: she would need to apologize in person. To me, apologizing

208
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:58,360
Speaker 2: is apparently something she doesn't do often, and imn sure

209
00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:00,720
Speaker 2: not in person. Now At this point, I start thinking,

210
00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:04,680
Speaker 2: surely my children have never done anything to her, right,

211
00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:08,960
Speaker 2: I've racked my brain. They truly hardly ever spoke to her.

212
00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:12,520
Speaker 2: They're loud in the way and just regular kids, but

213
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:16,480
Speaker 2: never have visibly or to my knowledge, upset her or

214
00:09:16,520 --> 00:09:20,920
Speaker 2: done anything intentionally or even unintentionally to upset her. I

215
00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:23,040
Speaker 2: just don't get how a grown woman can be some

216
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,160
Speaker 2: type of way to kids. It truly breaks my heart

217
00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:28,720
Speaker 2: for my kids too, because while my youngest eight male,

218
00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:33,200
Speaker 2: doesn't understand anything, my two oldest thirteen male and twelve female,

219
00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:35,679
Speaker 2: are old enough to understand what's going on. Even though

220
00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:39,040
Speaker 2: it's never been discussed with them directly, they've overheard conversations.

221
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:42,640
Speaker 2: As for me, well, prior to the storage incident, I'd

222
00:09:42,679 --> 00:09:45,000
Speaker 2: never really had much to say to my mother in law.

223
00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:48,080
Speaker 2: She'd make some wild comments here or there about people, places,

224
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,640
Speaker 2: whatever ranch she had that day, and I would just smile,

225
00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:54,000
Speaker 2: not say anything validating or invalidating. I am a very

226
00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,800
Speaker 2: passive person and it takes a lot to get me upset.

227
00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,640
Speaker 2: I also hold myself to a very high moral standard.

228
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,000
Speaker 2: It's a huge part of my religion, so saying distasteful

229
00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:07,679
Speaker 2: things or berating, belittling, ranting, and fueling a clearly flaming

230
00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:11,000
Speaker 2: bonfire just isn't my thing. Other than her drama tarades.

231
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:13,600
Speaker 2: Though we did have normal conversations, which I thought were

232
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:16,640
Speaker 2: always pleasant, I never got involved when she was arguing

233
00:10:16,640 --> 00:10:19,440
Speaker 2: with the family member or disagreeing with my husband, nor

234
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:21,720
Speaker 2: did I ever offer an opinion one way or another.

235
00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:24,520
Speaker 2: One month before our wedding March twenty twenty five, I

236
00:10:24,679 --> 00:10:27,920
Speaker 2: decided that I we would not be the reason his

237
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:29,560
Speaker 2: mother didn't attend our wedding.

238
00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,000
Speaker 4: While I was still upset.

239
00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:33,120
Speaker 2: With her, I'd had months to think, and even though

240
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:35,080
Speaker 2: I wasn't at a point to forgive her, it is

241
00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:38,360
Speaker 2: still my husband's mother, and her not being there ultimately

242
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:41,600
Speaker 2: would be damaging to any possible future relationship with.

243
00:10:41,559 --> 00:10:48,120
Speaker 3: His mother until she owns up to her own bad behavior. Yeah,

244
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:52,160
Speaker 3: there's no reason to build a bridge. I agree to

245
00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:56,080
Speaker 3: restore this relationship because then nothing has fundamentally changed.

246
00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:58,760
Speaker 2: We have had zero contact with her since Thanksgiving twenty

247
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:00,719
Speaker 2: twenty four. I told my husban than to tell one

248
00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:02,960
Speaker 2: of his sisters to invite her to the wedding. So

249
00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,360
Speaker 2: he did, and to my knowledge, both his sisters and

250
00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,120
Speaker 2: his brother best man did tell her she was invited.

251
00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:11,439
Speaker 2: The big day comes and drum rolled no mother in

252
00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:14,760
Speaker 2: law's sight. She did not come. Well I could tell.

253
00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:17,400
Speaker 2: It's sort of upset my husband. It didn't ruin our day,

254
00:11:17,440 --> 00:11:20,720
Speaker 2: and we are happily married. I stand firm. I want

255
00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:23,679
Speaker 2: a formal apology in person. We have still had no

256
00:11:23,840 --> 00:11:26,680
Speaker 2: contact with his mother. What did I marry into exactly?

257
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,200
Speaker 2: I think you're fine. I think you're aokay because your

258
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:33,240
Speaker 2: husband clearly is on your side and took very immediate

259
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:34,120
Speaker 2: action against her.

260
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,720
Speaker 4: So I think I think you're okay.

261
00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:39,800
Speaker 3: My boyfriend lets his mom control his finances and thinks

262
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,800
Speaker 3: I'm the controversial ones.

263
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:44,040
Speaker 2: Dude, you gotta start ponying up.

264
00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:47,240
Speaker 3: I Female twenty five know exactly what you're thinking from

265
00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,760
Speaker 3: the title typical Obama's boy who prioritizes his mom above

266
00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:54,360
Speaker 3: everything else and his poor girlfriend gets the scraps. But no,

267
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,920
Speaker 3: it's completely separate from that. By the way, this comes

268
00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:59,160
Speaker 3: from user outrageous Claim thirty two. And if you want

269
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:01,520
Speaker 3: to submit your own storyries, go to the r slash

270
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:02,959
Speaker 3: showcase Storytime Sebreada And.

271
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:04,520
Speaker 5: We're here to give good advice. Goofully.

272
00:12:04,559 --> 00:12:07,320
Speaker 3: But we don't have all the answers. We're only mortals.

273
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:10,000
Speaker 3: We only know what we would do in any given situation.

274
00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:12,520
Speaker 3: So if you do something different, let us know in

275
00:12:12,559 --> 00:12:15,560
Speaker 3: the comments. My boyfriend Mail twenty six avoids his mother

276
00:12:15,679 --> 00:12:18,080
Speaker 3: like ninety nine percent of the time, as much as

277
00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:20,120
Speaker 3: we can when we're renting a house with her and

278
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:22,240
Speaker 3: the rest of his family. She doesn't own the home.

279
00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:24,959
Speaker 3: We aren't living in her home, but we all live

280
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,160
Speaker 3: together in a big house in a high cost of

281
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:29,719
Speaker 3: living area. That gives us some great advantages that other

282
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:33,360
Speaker 3: twenty somethings don't usually get. Lots of space in arcade room,

283
00:12:33,679 --> 00:12:35,800
Speaker 3: multiple living rooms, in a room of our own for

284
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,520
Speaker 3: each of us. The problem is that he's extremely tied

285
00:12:38,559 --> 00:12:41,760
Speaker 3: to his mother in every way other than socially. He

286
00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:44,600
Speaker 3: pays his phone bill through her, his car payment and

287
00:12:44,679 --> 00:12:48,640
Speaker 3: insurance through her, and I find it extremely annoying if

288
00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:51,360
Speaker 3: we need to find his insurance information we have to

289
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:54,800
Speaker 3: ask her. It's like she dangles the information around, deciding

290
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,200
Speaker 3: if we are worthy of getting the information we need,

291
00:12:57,600 --> 00:13:00,640
Speaker 3: and even then she wants to submit the info herself

292
00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:02,680
Speaker 3: instead of getting it to us. She holds onto his

293
00:13:02,679 --> 00:13:05,720
Speaker 3: birth certificate and has to ask for copies, despite the

294
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:09,160
Speaker 3: fact we have our own files that I keep meticulous

295
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:12,199
Speaker 3: records in. This year, for my birthday, he co signed

296
00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:14,600
Speaker 3: on my new car to get me in a lower

297
00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:17,200
Speaker 3: monthly payment, something I love, and he offered to do

298
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,000
Speaker 3: for me for my birthday in order to finalize some documents,

299
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:23,320
Speaker 3: we had to attach my car insurance information and his

300
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:26,160
Speaker 3: history of car insurance. Instead of pulling up his car insurance,

301
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:28,000
Speaker 3: he had to text his mom and ask her for

302
00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,800
Speaker 3: the information. I sat there with my documents in my hand,

303
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,360
Speaker 3: waiting for his mother to decide whether or not he

304
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,280
Speaker 3: could have the information he needed, and she ultimately decided

305
00:13:36,320 --> 00:13:39,160
Speaker 3: not to give him his insurance information because it's my

306
00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:42,920
Speaker 3: car and he shouldn't need to show anything. From my

307
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,640
Speaker 3: point of view, it shouldn't matter why he wants his

308
00:13:45,679 --> 00:13:48,200
Speaker 3: own insurance information. He should be able to access it

309
00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,959
Speaker 3: whenever he wants, for whatever he wants. You've also been

310
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,760
Speaker 3: tinkering with the idea of upgrading both of our cell

311
00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:56,880
Speaker 3: phones next year, possibly even merging our cell phone plans together.

312
00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:59,120
Speaker 3: He had to ask his the mammy how many more

313
00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:01,800
Speaker 3: payments he had on iPad, and it took her four

314
00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:04,720
Speaker 3: weeks to give him the information he needed for us

315
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:07,640
Speaker 3: to plan further. When we're budgeting, I ask him something

316
00:14:07,679 --> 00:14:10,160
Speaker 3: as simple as how much is your car payment? Again,

317
00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:12,200
Speaker 3: and he has to text his mom to ask how

318
00:14:12,280 --> 00:14:14,520
Speaker 3: much he takes out of his bank account for his

319
00:14:14,559 --> 00:14:17,200
Speaker 3: car payment every month. For me, I have all of

320
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,760
Speaker 3: that on my own. I have my own health insurance

321
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:22,720
Speaker 3: through work, my own car insurance, my own phone plans,

322
00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:25,040
Speaker 3: I pay my own car loan every month, and it

323
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:28,200
Speaker 3: absolutely drives me insane that I can't get any information

324
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:31,320
Speaker 3: about finances without having to go through his mother. At

325
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,360
Speaker 3: twenty five and twenty six, I think it's extremely normal

326
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:37,560
Speaker 3: to handle all of these things yourself. But am I wrong?

327
00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:40,520
Speaker 3: I don't know if I'm annoyed because I'm extremely independent

328
00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:43,880
Speaker 3: and have been since I was around thirteen, or if

329
00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:46,080
Speaker 3: this is something that is actually just not normal and

330
00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:49,320
Speaker 3: really annoying. There are no other signs of mama's boy.

331
00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,840
Speaker 3: He never brings her around on our dates or ever

332
00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:54,040
Speaker 3: really wants her around at all. He seems just as

333
00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:55,920
Speaker 3: annoyed about this stuff as I do. But to me,

334
00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:58,200
Speaker 3: if he were really annoyed, he'd put a stop to it,

335
00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:01,360
Speaker 3: and he hasn't. Any advice to be appreciated. First advice

336
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,640
Speaker 3: would be like, have you talked him about why he

337
00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:04,160
Speaker 3: does this?

338
00:15:04,560 --> 00:15:04,680
Speaker 7: Like?

339
00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:05,760
Speaker 6: Why why does.

340
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:08,400
Speaker 4: He choose this? I think he just realized.

341
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,520
Speaker 6: He probably thinks it's I'm on the same boats. I

342
00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:12,280
Speaker 6: think we're I think we're giving him too much of

343
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:12,880
Speaker 6: a hard time.

344
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,360
Speaker 4: I think he's twenty six.

345
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:15,200
Speaker 5: That's not that much.

346
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:18,960
Speaker 3: You're playing in the co sign on an insurance thing

347
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,960
Speaker 3: with your partner and your mommy says, nuh uh, you

348
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:24,760
Speaker 3: can't do that at twenty six. But I think and

349
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:27,920
Speaker 3: you're like, not immediately like oh oh, You're just like, oh, well,

350
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:28,760
Speaker 3: I guess I can't.

351
00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:30,760
Speaker 6: I think he got parentified into that. I think he

352
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:33,440
Speaker 6: just like his mom probably like that's okay, like I

353
00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:35,320
Speaker 6: can do this. I like to see your funds. Yeah.

354
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,960
Speaker 6: I think he was like, I don't see anything wrong

355
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,680
Speaker 6: with that. I guess because my mom said he was okay.

356
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,400
Speaker 3: Comment one is I don't understand how it doesn't drive

357
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,520
Speaker 3: him insane. Dude needs to figure out where all this

358
00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:48,280
Speaker 3: paperwork is and go effing get it, Opie says. From

359
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,520
Speaker 3: what I've seen, she does this to both him and

360
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,600
Speaker 3: his brother, as well as their late father. I think

361
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:54,680
Speaker 3: they all just think it's normal, and I don't know

362
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:57,160
Speaker 3: how to convince them that it's not. Toman too. Now

363
00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,600
Speaker 3: that he's twenty six, he needs to remove his mother's

364
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:01,440
Speaker 3: access to his bank account. He can write her a

365
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:03,520
Speaker 3: check for his share of the rent and utility costs.

366
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,400
Speaker 3: Get his own car insurance at twenty five, the higher

367
00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:09,120
Speaker 3: rate just because he's a male under twenty five goes away,

368
00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,760
Speaker 3: so the reason to stay with parents' insurance goes away.

369
00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:13,880
Speaker 3: If she won't give him access to his birth certificate,

370
00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:17,000
Speaker 3: just order a new copy online. Same with the social

371
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:20,360
Speaker 3: Security cards. Present it as we are talking about joining

372
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:23,240
Speaker 3: our finances, but having your mother keep the ability to

373
00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:26,560
Speaker 3: see an access bills and bank accounts is a deal breaker.

374
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:29,400
Speaker 3: He can be financially entangled with his mom or with you,

375
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:32,360
Speaker 3: but not both. Once you secure his cooperation. Since this

376
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,760
Speaker 3: seems to be more out of habit and convenience, you

377
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:38,080
Speaker 3: will probably need to help him develop a budget so

378
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,840
Speaker 3: that bills don't get missed or paid late. Because he

379
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:43,840
Speaker 3: hasn't had to do this yet. Do not commingle your

380
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:46,480
Speaker 3: money until after he has shown that he has learned

381
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:47,760
Speaker 3: to do this independently.

382
00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:48,640
Speaker 6: Come in three.

383
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:51,560
Speaker 3: He is correct, that's how she is, but he's also

384
00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:54,640
Speaker 3: allowing her to control his money. With minimal effort, he

385
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:57,720
Speaker 3: can easily get his birth certificate without his mother's consent,

386
00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:00,720
Speaker 3: open his own bank account and block her actions, get

387
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:03,360
Speaker 3: his own phone insurance, and make his own car payment.

388
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:05,000
Speaker 3: If he doesn't do that, then you are going to

389
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:06,960
Speaker 3: want to get yourself out of that situation because he

390
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:09,399
Speaker 3: hears a mummer's bory and he will not take control

391
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:11,679
Speaker 3: of his life for finances. While she is alive. He

392
00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:13,600
Speaker 3: can break away from her, he just isn't. Since you

393
00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:15,879
Speaker 3: live with him and you have combined your income with his,

394
00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:19,800
Speaker 3: you are also tied to her. This dynamic will never change. Ever.

395
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:22,080
Speaker 3: You have to decide if you want this woman controlling

396
00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:25,680
Speaker 3: your life, because right now she does, by your own admission, thankfully,

397
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:28,840
Speaker 3: everything of yours you pay for yourself, and whatever you

398
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:31,040
Speaker 3: do don't have kids with. Well, Okay, we're going a.

399
00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:31,520
Speaker 5: Little too far.

400
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:32,720
Speaker 4: See I think that's too fast.

401
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:34,720
Speaker 5: It's too far right now, he's twenty six.

402
00:17:34,880 --> 00:17:38,840
Speaker 3: I don't think your cause is addressable. Yeah, here's an update.

403
00:17:38,880 --> 00:17:39,720
Speaker 6: Eight days later.

404
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:42,280
Speaker 3: Today he told me he will be getting a new phone,

405
00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,840
Speaker 3: but that his mom handled it for him while he

406
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,960
Speaker 3: was at work. She called him during one of his

407
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:49,640
Speaker 3: busiest hours and asked him a bunch of rapid fire questions,

408
00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:52,080
Speaker 3: ones that he answered without paying much attention. His job

409
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,400
Speaker 3: is very physical, so he likely had an ear piece

410
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,600
Speaker 3: in and listened to her that way. It ended with

411
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,359
Speaker 3: him getting a new phone. Without having to trade his

412
00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:00,480
Speaker 3: phone in. When I asked how that was possible, he said,

413
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:02,320
Speaker 3: apparently it was the only way to get my new

414
00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:04,720
Speaker 3: phone without me having to open my own separate phone plan.

415
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:08,440
Speaker 2: Oh no, you are right there. You guys literally want

416
00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:09,840
Speaker 2: to have your own phone plan together.

417
00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:12,000
Speaker 3: This guy's trying to hang out in club, baby.

418
00:18:12,840 --> 00:18:14,720
Speaker 2: Very serious conversation with your board friend.

419
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 6: Now, I thought this was perfect.

420
00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:19,760
Speaker 3: What a great way to bring up this tough conversation organically,

421
00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:22,240
Speaker 3: I said, what's wrong with opening your own phone plan?

422
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:25,439
Speaker 3: And he just shrugged. So I brought the whole thing up.

423
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:27,280
Speaker 3: I can't say exactly what I said because it was

424
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,879
Speaker 3: word vomit on my part, but eventually, as I was

425
00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:32,359
Speaker 3: saying all of this, he said, Okay, I don't want

426
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:35,120
Speaker 3: to talk about this anymore. No, So I told him

427
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:37,840
Speaker 3: we can't just ignore this, and he said it wasn't

428
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:40,160
Speaker 3: a big deal. After a bit of silence, he said,

429
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:43,119
Speaker 3: I didn't know that talking to you would be so controversial.

430
00:18:43,280 --> 00:18:46,040
Speaker 3: I tried to stay on track, looking at this as

431
00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:48,840
Speaker 3: a whole. He said that either way, he'd been tied

432
00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,560
Speaker 3: to his mom's account by having to pay off his

433
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,200
Speaker 3: iPhone through her. No matter what it would have been

434
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:56,160
Speaker 3: a while before he was detached. So what's one more thing?

435
00:18:56,359 --> 00:18:58,560
Speaker 3: I asked, Okay, but when does that end? Don't you

436
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:00,399
Speaker 3: think it's weird that you can't even tell me how

437
00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:02,800
Speaker 3: much of your bills are, that everything is through her.

438
00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:05,960
Speaker 3: Everything a normal couple has tied together four years in

439
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,520
Speaker 3: you have with your mom. I never thought that when

440
00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:10,440
Speaker 3: you told me at twenty one that everything was tied

441
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,240
Speaker 3: to your mom, that you'd still be the same way

442
00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:14,720
Speaker 3: at twenty six. He asked what I wanted him to do,

443
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,560
Speaker 3: and that no matter what he did, he'd still be

444
00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:19,280
Speaker 3: ultimately financially tied to his mom until his car is

445
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:21,520
Speaker 3: paid off, so it doesn't matter. And that's when I

446
00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,960
Speaker 3: kind of snapped. I said, and don't you think it's

447
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:25,919
Speaker 3: weird she keeps calling you while you're at work and

448
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:28,640
Speaker 3: then you end up locked in long term contracts with her?

449
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:31,159
Speaker 3: Is she doing this on purpose? And he said, I

450
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:35,000
Speaker 3: mean probably yeah. So I asked him why he doesn't

451
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:37,280
Speaker 3: see a problem with it, and he said he's just

452
00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:40,520
Speaker 3: nonchalant about it. At this point, it feels like he

453
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:44,760
Speaker 3: is truly not seeing the problem. I feel incredibly frustrated

454
00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,440
Speaker 3: and angry that he just lets her do this. It's

455
00:19:47,440 --> 00:19:49,480
Speaker 3: like he likes it, which makes no sense to me.

456
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:51,840
Speaker 3: I just don't get it. I just do not understand

457
00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:55,000
Speaker 3: how grown man, which I guess he's not not quiet

458
00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:57,119
Speaker 3: because he's still a baby. He wants to be a

459
00:19:57,119 --> 00:19:59,199
Speaker 3: baby boy. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if this

460
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:02,679
Speaker 3: is like break up territory, but like it's definitely like

461
00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,600
Speaker 3: big old card assessing how much you want to be,

462
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:09,199
Speaker 3: Like it might be like pulling back territory or like

463
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:11,360
Speaker 3: moving out. I know you said that like living here

464
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,520
Speaker 3: affords you guys a lot of you know, stuff, But

465
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:15,800
Speaker 3: it's like being like, I don't want to be in

466
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,440
Speaker 3: this environment because it's it feels like I'm living with

467
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:19,320
Speaker 3: just a child.

468
00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 2: I think it's having a big conversation and saying if

469
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:23,080
Speaker 2: I don't if you don't see a change, I don't

470
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:24,800
Speaker 2: know how we can start a life together if you

471
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:26,280
Speaker 2: can't separate your life with your.

472
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:28,399
Speaker 3: Mother, truly, if you can't see that, I don't know.

473
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,960
Speaker 3: If you can't be responsible for your own stuff, how

474
00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,359
Speaker 3: are we gonna have a life together where you have

475
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,119
Speaker 3: to be responsible for your own things?

476
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:38,880
Speaker 6: Like it's just the how long when your mom's gone? Yeah,

477
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:41,400
Speaker 6: Like how long do you want to do this forever?

478
00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:46,159
Speaker 3: How do you not mind not taking personal responsibility for

479
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:49,320
Speaker 3: things like this? The car I get, but I know

480
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 3: that I had an active loan with my mom that

481
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:53,600
Speaker 3: I got transferred into my own account a few years ago,

482
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:55,760
Speaker 3: so I know he can get his phone separated from

483
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:58,520
Speaker 3: her at least in hard times. She threatens to drop

484
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,320
Speaker 3: his name from the title to raise his insurance rates.

485
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:03,800
Speaker 3: But now he's twenty six, so if we asked her

486
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,720
Speaker 3: to drop her name, his insurance rates wouldn't go up

487
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,440
Speaker 3: and she wouldn't have anything to threaten him over. Then

488
00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:12,000
Speaker 3: she'd have nothing over him anymore. But he doesn't seem

489
00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 3: to care, and I'm starting to think that it's because

490
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 3: he doesn't want to have to worry about paying anything

491
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,479
Speaker 3: on his own. It feels like a massive red flag

492
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:21,000
Speaker 3: at twenty five and twenty six. I'm not sure it's

493
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,240
Speaker 3: a red flag. I'm willing to ignore. Yeah, and that's

494
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:24,080
Speaker 3: the end of that story.

495
00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 2: I think, Yeah, if the conversations don't work, then you

496
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:30,160
Speaker 2: got to reassess. My mother in law mocked our marriage.

497
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:34,120
Speaker 2: Now I want her nowhere near our future kids. Mocked

498
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:37,840
Speaker 2: to blocked for context, I twenty seven female moved to

499
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:41,560
Speaker 2: another country completely alone last year and met my now

500
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:45,440
Speaker 2: husband twenty five mail shortly after. We were immediately inseparable,

501
00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:48,240
Speaker 2: and while I was excited to meet his mom, she

502
00:21:48,359 --> 00:21:50,280
Speaker 2: was traveling quite a bit at the time. We ended

503
00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 2: up meeting about six months into dating. By the way,

504
00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:55,919
Speaker 2: this comes from broad Initiative nine six five and if

505
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 2: you want to asmit your own stories, go to the

506
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:58,919
Speaker 2: r slash Okay storytime Subparate.

507
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:02,800
Speaker 3: I'm Sofia, I'm Dakota, and I'm Keon and we're here to.

508
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,000
Speaker 2: Give good advice scoofully, but we don't have all the answers.

509
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:06,800
Speaker 2: We only know what we'd do, so let us know

510
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:08,280
Speaker 2: what you would do in the comments.

511
00:22:08,359 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 4: We decided on dinner at hers, and it was a nightmare.

512
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:13,879
Speaker 2: I was ecstatic to meet her, but she spent the

513
00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:19,400
Speaker 2: entire dinner GRILLINGAM for choosing this over its possible career

514
00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:23,040
Speaker 2: in boxing, and saying he would get shot during our

515
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,480
Speaker 2: plan trip to my home country. We ended up cutting

516
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:28,239
Speaker 2: the dinner short after sitting through almost an hour of

517
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:31,680
Speaker 2: comments like these. Fast forward to our trip. We decided

518
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,119
Speaker 2: to Elope, since neither side of our family was in

519
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:36,720
Speaker 2: a financial position to travel for a wedding and his

520
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:39,520
Speaker 2: mother literally refuses to get on a plane. We figured

521
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:42,879
Speaker 2: eloping would reduce any possible drama. The ceremony was just

522
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 2: my husband, myself, and the efficient. We avoided making any

523
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:50,240
Speaker 2: posts until all immediate family was informed. My family welcomed

524
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:52,960
Speaker 2: my husband with open arms, and his family handled it

525
00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 2: well too. I felt loved and welcomed by everyone except

526
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 2: his mother. Upon returning home, she asked if we could

527
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,480
Speaker 2: come over to spend time with the family. I wasn't

528
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:05,600
Speaker 2: a fan of this idea, considering how the dinner had gone,

529
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:08,879
Speaker 2: but I pushed myself to go, hoping for the best.

530
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:10,119
Speaker 4: It was horrible.

531
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:12,920
Speaker 2: While everyone else was excited to hear about the trip

532
00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 2: and ceremony, she had something else in mind, so I

533
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:20,840
Speaker 2: must ask. She goes, are you pregnant? Uh no, I

534
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:24,200
Speaker 2: respond with a confused look. Oh okay, Well, I'll let

535
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:27,359
Speaker 2: the family know that you guys married because you actually

536
00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 2: love each other. She then asked if she could be

537
00:23:29,560 --> 00:23:31,919
Speaker 2: the one to announce our marriage on social media, to

538
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:35,800
Speaker 2: which my sister in law immediately stepped in, saying, uh no,

539
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,399
Speaker 2: let them announce it themselves.

540
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:38,680
Speaker 4: I was speechless.

541
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:44,159
Speaker 3: One hundred trillion dollars on her announcing your wedding yea

542
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:45,680
Speaker 3: on her own.

543
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 2: We left shortly after, and I told my husband about it,

544
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,480
Speaker 2: since he had been talking to his sister and completely

545
00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:53,680
Speaker 2: missed what his mother had said. Once I told him,

546
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:57,400
Speaker 2: he apologized profusely. We temporarily moved in with her about

547
00:23:57,400 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 2: a month later due to unforeseen circumstances, and it has

548
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:03,680
Speaker 2: been like living in a heck. She made comments about

549
00:24:03,720 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 2: someone like him choosing someone like me and got wasted

550
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:09,359
Speaker 2: one night to express her feelings about us being together.

551
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:11,639
Speaker 2: His sister had to step in to tell her she

552
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,119
Speaker 2: was being rude. I went back to therapy to avoid

553
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:16,400
Speaker 2: reaching the point where I want nothing to do with her.

554
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:19,199
Speaker 2: My therapist advised we set boundaries so if we go

555
00:24:19,359 --> 00:24:21,639
Speaker 2: no contact, she can't say she doesn't know why we

556
00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 2: attempted this, and she spent the entire conversation saying things like,

557
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,400
Speaker 2: so I'm just supposed to not say anything or not

558
00:24:28,480 --> 00:24:29,360
Speaker 2: be involved.

559
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:32,000
Speaker 4: When I made it clear our marriage decisions were none

560
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,240
Speaker 4: of her concern.

561
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,439
Speaker 2: She responded, if you're this upset about my behavior, then

562
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: I'm worried about how it's gonna be when you meet

563
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:40,879
Speaker 2: the rest of the family. Everyone else has been great,

564
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,920
Speaker 2: it's literally just her. I also asked if she could

565
00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:46,320
Speaker 2: not stick her hands in our food, which she has

566
00:24:46,359 --> 00:24:48,520
Speaker 2: a habit of doing, and I find it disgusting.

567
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:49,480
Speaker 6: Why are we doing that?

568
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,880
Speaker 2: A few days after our chat with her, I had

569
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,520
Speaker 2: just finished cooking and was getting ready to put together

570
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,160
Speaker 2: plates for my husband myself, and as I'm doing so,

571
00:24:57,280 --> 00:24:59,760
Speaker 2: she walked over to the food and in a mocking tone,

572
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 2: can I gabs? I'm with my hands or do I

573
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:06,480
Speaker 2: need to use a fork? I responded, please use the fork,

574
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 2: which happened to be sitting next to the food. She

575
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:12,520
Speaker 2: proceeds to stick her unwashed hands into our food. She

576
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:15,320
Speaker 2: let out a giggle and said she only grabbed one.

577
00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:17,440
Speaker 4: That was it. That was the last straw.

578
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:20,439
Speaker 2: It was clearly done to get a reaction out of me,

579
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:22,159
Speaker 2: and I made it clear to my husband that I

580
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,000
Speaker 2: want nothing more to do with her. She's been rude

581
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 2: since day one, despite my efforts to have a good

582
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:29,840
Speaker 2: relationship with her. I told my husband that once we

583
00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:32,639
Speaker 2: have kids, there will be a no kissing rule to

584
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:35,199
Speaker 2: keep baby safe, and I don't feel she would respect

585
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:36,200
Speaker 2: this given her behavior.

586
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:39,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, she'd probably jammer unwashed hands all over the baby.

587
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:42,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, she'd be like, ah, well, I'm not supposed to touch

588
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 2: the baby.

589
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:46,000
Speaker 3: She'd be like, I'm gonna go into the septic tank

590
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,520
Speaker 3: and then I'll take the baby in there and kiss it.

591
00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:50,439
Speaker 2: I don't want her to have anything to do with

592
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:53,320
Speaker 2: our future kids. Given her lack of respect for boundaries,

593
00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:56,000
Speaker 2: we decided to look for another place to stay rather

594
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:57,520
Speaker 2: than see her every day.

595
00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:00,320
Speaker 5: Smart, get out of there. Yup, you hate her? It's

596
00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:00,920
Speaker 5: a time.

597
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:03,639
Speaker 4: There is an update, but uh, literally just get out

598
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:03,920
Speaker 4: of there.

599
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:05,040
Speaker 5: Got contact.

600
00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:08,040
Speaker 3: And to be clear, if your hands are washed and clean,

601
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:09,320
Speaker 3: they can touch food.

602
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:11,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, but if you just got your.

603
00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 3: Filthy unwashed Mitch shoved into the food. Gross, what is

604
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:16,320
Speaker 3: wrong with you?

605
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:19,760
Speaker 2: Well, crap finally hit the fan yesterday and my husband

606
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:23,159
Speaker 2: was finally able to see her true colors. Since meeting her,

607
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:26,399
Speaker 2: she's always made nasty comments or given me dirty looks

608
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 2: when my husband wasn't around. Then she tried to hug

609
00:26:29,080 --> 00:26:31,119
Speaker 2: me and tell him how how lucky he is to

610
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 2: have someone as amazing as me. Whenever he entered the room.

611
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:36,440
Speaker 2: It was like something out of a movie. When I'd

612
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,400
Speaker 2: tell my husband about this, he'd say, what, mom.

613
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:40,480
Speaker 4: Literally loves you?

614
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,720
Speaker 2: Do you see how much he brags about you. I

615
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:44,800
Speaker 2: don't blame him because she could have won an Oscar

616
00:26:44,880 --> 00:26:48,159
Speaker 2: for playing the world's fakest witch. It's been months of

617
00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 2: me mentioning these things. While he'd catch glimpses here and there,

618
00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:55,400
Speaker 2: he hadn't witnessed the extremes I'd been dealing with. Until yesterday.

619
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:57,720
Speaker 2: I'd been praying everything would come to light so he

620
00:26:57,720 --> 00:27:00,600
Speaker 2: could see how monstrous his mother truly is. I felt

621
00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 2: like I was starting to sound insane. I knew my

622
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:05,680
Speaker 2: husband believed me, but maybe thought I was exaggerating from

623
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:08,399
Speaker 2: being uncomfortable. But I'm no stranger to being out of

624
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 2: my comfort zone. I've solo traveled the world, so being

625
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 2: in a house with a fifty something year old woman

626
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:15,719
Speaker 2: would be a walk in the park if she were normal.

627
00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:18,400
Speaker 2: My husband and she had a chat yesterday, mostly her

628
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:20,960
Speaker 2: eventing about wanting to focus on herself and her artwork

629
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:23,800
Speaker 2: now that her kids are adults. Her hobbies are watching

630
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,680
Speaker 2: TikTok videos and making artwork out of garbage.

631
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:29,600
Speaker 3: Well, that could be cool, but sure, I don't know

632
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:33,280
Speaker 3: recyclingse I think that turning garbage into art is a

633
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:34,360
Speaker 3: good way to recycle.

634
00:27:34,560 --> 00:27:37,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, she lives on government assistance and sits at home

635
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:39,560
Speaker 2: twenty four seven, which is why she has time to

636
00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:42,440
Speaker 2: worry about everyone else's lives. My husband said he thought

637
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:45,119
Speaker 2: it was a great idea for her to focus on herself.

638
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,959
Speaker 2: They talked about how everyone is getting married or engaged,

639
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:50,639
Speaker 2: and during this my husband said how I am his

640
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 2: priority and how he's looking forward to building a family

641
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,119
Speaker 2: with me. Any sane person would have taken this as

642
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:58,560
Speaker 2: a newly married man looking forward to having kids with

643
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:03,040
Speaker 2: his wife. But she's far from saying, she responds defensively, Yeah,

644
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:05,160
Speaker 2: but don't forget that you have an actual family.

645
00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:10,400
Speaker 8: Oh shut up, woman, leave us alone, which he responds, yeah,

646
00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 8: of course that's never gonna change.

647
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:14,120
Speaker 2: But I also have a wife who is a part

648
00:28:14,160 --> 00:28:16,200
Speaker 2: of that family now as well. We left the house

649
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:18,480
Speaker 2: shortly after, as we had a few errands to run

650
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:21,359
Speaker 2: and needed to grab lunch. Once we return, my husband

651
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:24,359
Speaker 2: started taking things inside. Before I had a chance to

652
00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 2: get out of the car, I received a rapid thread

653
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:29,879
Speaker 2: of messages from him asking me to stay in the

654
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:32,680
Speaker 2: car because he was talking with his mom. This alone

655
00:28:32,760 --> 00:28:35,199
Speaker 2: was enough to let me know that something was wrong.

656
00:28:35,440 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 2: About fifteen to twenty minutes later, he comes out of

657
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:40,800
Speaker 2: the house. I could tell he was furious, and given

658
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:42,640
Speaker 2: that he is a hands down one of the hardest

659
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:46,040
Speaker 2: people to upset, I knew things had gotten bad. He

660
00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:48,800
Speaker 2: gets into the car and says, we're moving today. This

661
00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 2: is ridiculous.

662
00:28:50,040 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 4: His mom told him, we've.

663
00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 2: Been extremely disrespectful, especially your wife. He asked what she

664
00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:58,440
Speaker 2: was talking about, since neither of us have ever said

665
00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,680
Speaker 2: anything rude to her. Your wife doesn't bothered to have

666
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:03,480
Speaker 2: conversations with me, to which he explained that I've decided

667
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 2: to limit socializing with her since she purposely over steps

668
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,680
Speaker 2: boundaries After she mocked me and put her dirty hands

669
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:11,720
Speaker 2: in our food. After being told no, I told my

670
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 2: husband that for my own sanity, I felt it was

671
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:16,440
Speaker 2: best not to socialize with her because her actions were

672
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:19,760
Speaker 2: clearly intentional. My husband was very supportive since he was

673
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,320
Speaker 2: starting to see what I'd been bringing up for months.

674
00:29:22,440 --> 00:29:23,480
Speaker 4: She found it.

675
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 2: Very disrespectful that his new wife wasn't attempting to get

676
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:30,400
Speaker 2: to know her, when in reality, I've exhausted every attempt

677
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:32,720
Speaker 2: at bonding with her, only to be met with rude

678
00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:36,320
Speaker 2: comments each time. I pushed myself beyond my limits. Because

679
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 2: I knew my husband would love for us to have

680
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:41,360
Speaker 2: a good relationship, but he was seeing she's the source.

681
00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:41,920
Speaker 4: Of all the drama.

682
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:45,960
Speaker 2: She became increasingly irate, yelling and insisting he'd tell me

683
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,120
Speaker 2: to come inside to talk to her. He said no,

684
00:29:48,560 --> 00:29:51,440
Speaker 2: letting her know we wouldn't have a conversation unless she

685
00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 2: calmed down, and that I've made my decision to keep

686
00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:57,440
Speaker 2: my distance until we found a place. By the grace

687
00:29:57,480 --> 00:30:01,280
Speaker 2: of God, we made some calls and into place within minutes.

688
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 2: We went into the house without speaking to her, just

689
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 2: packing our things. We dropped our first load at the

690
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 2: new house and went back for a second. We walked

691
00:30:09,640 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 2: in to find her calling any family willing to listen,

692
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:15,120
Speaker 2: telling them that she doesn't welcome me into the family

693
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:18,960
Speaker 2: because we didn't ask for her blat thanks full offense.

694
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:23,200
Speaker 2: I don't need approval from someone who has multiple kids,

695
00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:26,480
Speaker 2: no record of any stable relationship, and who happens to

696
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 2: be a self absorbed, heavy drinker, judgmental witch. She spewed

697
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:34,400
Speaker 2: lies about me, my husband, and our marriage right in

698
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 2: front of us. We're both huming, but we know she's

699
00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 2: hoping for reaction and we're not giving her the satisfaction.

700
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 2: We finished packing the car with our things, and he

701
00:30:44,560 --> 00:30:47,680
Speaker 2: apologizes to me, letting me know that he finally sees

702
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:50,040
Speaker 2: her true colors. He hands me his phone as we're

703
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,520
Speaker 2: driving off and asks me to block her on everything

704
00:30:52,760 --> 00:30:55,000
Speaker 2: and to remove him from all of the family group

705
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,680
Speaker 2: chats that she's in. I do so, which puts his

706
00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 2: siblings and family in the chat on alert. Messages start

707
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 2: flooding in right away, with everyone calling to see if

708
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 2: we're okay. We fill them in on the situation and

709
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 2: they apologize profusely, letting me know that they not only

710
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:12,360
Speaker 2: completely welcome me into the family, but also love having

711
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:14,080
Speaker 2: me as a new part of the family. They were

712
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:17,000
Speaker 2: devastated to hear what we had experienced, but even more

713
00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 2: upset that I had been subjected to it for months.

714
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,480
Speaker 2: We returned today to grab the remainder of our things,

715
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,280
Speaker 2: as we were both too mentally and physically exhausted to

716
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,920
Speaker 2: finish yesterday. We didn't speak a word to her. She

717
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:30,920
Speaker 2: apparently made a comment to my husband what a disappointing

718
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 2: outcome that was, to which she ignored her and continued

719
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:34,160
Speaker 2: to pack the car.

720
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:36,040
Speaker 8: I would like I would do like the what's like

721
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:40,800
Speaker 8: the soccer chamir where they clapp and go oh oh,

722
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 8: I would just like just be aggressively strange.

723
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:45,080
Speaker 3: Strange.

724
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:47,520
Speaker 2: She also stood in the doorway watching me as I

725
00:31:47,600 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 2: packed the car. I guess as a way to try

726
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,480
Speaker 2: to intimidate me, but it really just gave off I

727
00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:56,040
Speaker 2: belong in a psych word vibes. We pretty much settled

728
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:59,280
Speaker 2: into the new place and we both completely cut contact

729
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:00,960
Speaker 2: with her. I've made made it very clear to my

730
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 2: husband that even if he decides to forgive her in

731
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:06,600
Speaker 2: the future, I want nothing else to do with her,

732
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:09,360
Speaker 2: and she will never meet our future kids. He guy

733
00:32:09,520 --> 00:32:11,360
Speaker 2: was worried about our plants being in the same house

734
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:13,720
Speaker 2: with her. There's no way I'd ever trust her around

735
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:15,960
Speaker 2: my kids. I also want to mention that we're only

736
00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 2: three months into being married, and I don't feel like

737
00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 2: we ever really got a chance to honeymoon because we've

738
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:24,360
Speaker 2: spent almost every day since then playing peacekeepers. I also

739
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:26,160
Speaker 2: found out that she had a falling out with her

740
00:32:26,240 --> 00:32:28,440
Speaker 2: daughter because of similar reasons, and that she and her

741
00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 2: partner have also cut contact due to mother in law

742
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 2: being extremely disrespectful to them. She apparently feels that she

743
00:32:33,840 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 2: should be their first and main priority, which I assume

744
00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,600
Speaker 2: is what triggered her when she was speaking with my husband.

745
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:42,640
Speaker 2: We're over there, bs and are really just looking forward

746
00:32:42,640 --> 00:32:45,800
Speaker 2: to enjoying our time together without a gremlin witch heckling

747
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:48,440
Speaker 2: down our next twenty four seven. And that's the end

748
00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:49,480
Speaker 2: of that story, folks.

749
00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 3: So grembling Witch is gone.

750
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:55,440
Speaker 5: She has been sent back to a whole John here

751
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 5: og host.

752
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:57,600
Speaker 1: We're going to get back to these stories, but a

753
00:32:57,640 --> 00:32:59,560
Speaker 1: quick free minute break from hous from our sponsors.

754
00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 7: My friend ruined mine my girlfriend's name. Now I want

755
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,040
Speaker 7: to expose him.

756
00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:06,719
Speaker 6: Do it.

757
00:33:07,120 --> 00:33:11,000
Speaker 7: I'llow it and trigger warning here there are mentions of use.

758
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:14,480
Speaker 7: So let me start with how me and my ex

759
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:19,480
Speaker 7: best friend thirty one mail met. For anonymity purposes, we

760
00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 7: will call him Kevin. In April of this year, before

761
00:33:22,560 --> 00:33:24,760
Speaker 7: I met my girlfriend, I went to a camping music

762
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:27,760
Speaker 7: festival with my close friend group. My friend group introduced

763
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 7: me to Kevin and his friend group. Kevin was an

764
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 7: incredible person at the time. He had a lot of attitude,

765
00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,680
Speaker 7: but he never directed it at me or our friend group.

766
00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,640
Speaker 7: We connected heavily at the festival. We both shared some

767
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:43,120
Speaker 7: of our traumas and became really close friends in a

768
00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 7: short amount of time. By the way, this comes from

769
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:49,120
Speaker 7: away to concentrate five seven three five And if you

770
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:50,719
Speaker 7: want to submit your own stories, go to the our

771
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:53,760
Speaker 7: slash Okay storytime Supreddit. And I'm Angie and I'm Keon,

772
00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:56,680
Speaker 7: and we don't have all the answers. We're just gonna

773
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:58,400
Speaker 7: guess what we would do in this situation. But if

774
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:01,480
Speaker 7: you would do anything differently, let us know in the comments.

775
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:02,840
Speaker 5: So Op says.

776
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 7: After the festival, we would play video games regularly as

777
00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:08,320
Speaker 7: he lived two hours away from me. Our friendship was

778
00:34:08,360 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 7: solidified at another music festival where three of us in

779
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:14,759
Speaker 7: that group really became close. Everything started to change when

780
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:17,520
Speaker 7: I met my girlfriend at a music event in June.

781
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 5: We hit it off incredibly well.

782
00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:22,319
Speaker 7: We would finish each other's sentences and everything felt like

783
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:24,399
Speaker 7: home with her. I haven't felt like this in over

784
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:27,560
Speaker 7: two years. And for context, I had tried to date

785
00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:29,320
Speaker 7: it quite a bit in those two years, but always

786
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 7: ended up in very toxic relationships that left me broken

787
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:34,799
Speaker 7: and hurt. So much so that Kevin and others from

788
00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:38,080
Speaker 7: the friend group Janet included, started a group chat so

789
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,240
Speaker 7: that I could vet the people that I was talking

790
00:34:40,239 --> 00:34:42,800
Speaker 7: to because I was not good at picking good partners

791
00:34:43,400 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 7: with my girlfriend. Everything seemed just right, and I immediately

792
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:49,520
Speaker 7: started to put a lot of energy into her. We

793
00:34:49,560 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 7: would spend a lot of time together, and I became

794
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,239
Speaker 7: a little distant to my other friends because I felt

795
00:34:54,280 --> 00:34:57,640
Speaker 7: like I found the one. The communication between Kevin, Janet,

796
00:34:57,640 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 7: and I started to dwindle, but Kevin and Janet stayed

797
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 7: in touch regularly.

798
00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:02,600
Speaker 5: We were still good friends.

799
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 7: But there was a change in the dynamic, and I

800
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 7: own that Kevin had expressed concerns about how quickly my

801
00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:11,080
Speaker 7: relationship was progressing and how he missed our communication. In July,

802
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:15,279
Speaker 7: the entire friend group went to another music festival. Unfortunately,

803
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 7: there were some moments that caused a rift between my

804
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:21,080
Speaker 7: girlfriend and Janet. A lot of miscommunication occurred, but both

805
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:23,520
Speaker 7: of them felt slighted by the other, and Kevin was

806
00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:25,640
Speaker 7: in the middle of it. Janet started to talk to

807
00:35:25,719 --> 00:35:27,560
Speaker 7: everyone in the group about how she was feeling and

808
00:35:27,600 --> 00:35:30,719
Speaker 7: basically made the group feel extremely weird about my girlfriend.

809
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:34,040
Speaker 7: My girlfriend tried to have conversations with Janet, but she

810
00:35:34,120 --> 00:35:36,960
Speaker 7: ghosted us for a month and a half. Kevin said

811
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 7: that he was trying to help foster a better relationship

812
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:42,759
Speaker 7: between them. However, Kevin was now getting mad at all

813
00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:45,040
Speaker 7: the drama and was starting to make me feel like

814
00:35:45,120 --> 00:35:47,640
Speaker 7: he was mad at me as well. A couple of

815
00:35:47,719 --> 00:35:50,279
Speaker 7: weeks later, my girlfriend went to a festival that she

816
00:35:50,320 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 7: had planned before we started talking, and because of my trauma,

817
00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:57,120
Speaker 7: I got incredibly insecure. I was asking for assistance from Kevin,

818
00:35:57,160 --> 00:35:59,200
Speaker 7: so I didn't go off the deep end. I leaned

819
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:01,719
Speaker 7: on him pretty heavily, so much so he stated that

820
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 7: he did not have the bandwidth to help me through

821
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:06,720
Speaker 7: this situation as he had just started a new job.

822
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:10,400
Speaker 7: I apologized for leaning on him so heavily, but explained

823
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:12,600
Speaker 7: that he was someone that I fell close to and trusted,

824
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:15,840
Speaker 7: something that he previously had told me would never be

825
00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:18,839
Speaker 7: a problem if I ever needed assistance. At the end

826
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:22,040
Speaker 7: of August, we all decided to go to another music festival,

827
00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:25,279
Speaker 7: and this one went really well. On the last day,

828
00:36:25,400 --> 00:36:29,120
Speaker 7: I decided to do some spicy flower for context. I

829
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:31,399
Speaker 7: had a major problem with this about five years back

830
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:33,719
Speaker 7: that I had communicated with my friends and told them

831
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:37,360
Speaker 7: that I stay away from it. My girlfriend occasionally indulges

832
00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,560
Speaker 7: with this and dated At this particular festival, I wanted

833
00:36:40,560 --> 00:36:42,400
Speaker 7: to give it a shot and see if it still

834
00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:43,000
Speaker 7: had a.

835
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 5: Vice grip over me.

836
00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:46,560
Speaker 7: After the festival was over, Kevin asked if he could

837
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:48,440
Speaker 7: get a ride with us to a little after party

838
00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:51,520
Speaker 7: at one of our friend's house. The Spicy Flower continued

839
00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:54,280
Speaker 7: and I got into a pretty anxious headspace and wanted

840
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:56,320
Speaker 7: to leave. Around five to six am. He got in

841
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:58,600
Speaker 7: the car and started to drive home. We also had

842
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:01,080
Speaker 7: my girlfriend's best friend in the car. I was completely

843
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:03,840
Speaker 7: exhausted and the drive home was well over an hour.

844
00:37:04,360 --> 00:37:06,640
Speaker 7: As we got closer, my girlfriend started to get tired

845
00:37:06,680 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 7: and asked if we could drive back to her house

846
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,920
Speaker 7: and if everyone could get an uber back home. Her

847
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:14,880
Speaker 7: best friend understood and said that was fine. Kevin seemed

848
00:37:14,920 --> 00:37:17,360
Speaker 7: a little annoyed, but agreed that that was fine. I

849
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:19,840
Speaker 7: noticed how annoyed he was and tried to mitigate the

850
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:23,160
Speaker 7: problem by offering to buy his uber home. He thanks

851
00:37:23,239 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 7: me for that, and I bought his uber home and

852
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:27,400
Speaker 7: went inside to go to bed without waiting for the

853
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:29,560
Speaker 7: uber because I was basically falling.

854
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:30,239
Speaker 5: Asleep standing up.

855
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:32,839
Speaker 7: Fast forward a couple of days and I find out

856
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:35,799
Speaker 7: that Kevin had called every single person in our friend

857
00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:38,560
Speaker 7: group and told them that I left him alone to

858
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:42,040
Speaker 7: deal with his phobia of off right of ride shares,

859
00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:45,360
Speaker 7: which he had never told me about. He told everyone

860
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,400
Speaker 7: that he thought that I was a regular user and

861
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:50,840
Speaker 7: had no care for how his friends felt.

862
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 5: He said.

863
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:54,080
Speaker 7: He said that I was spending all my money on

864
00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 7: substances and my girlfriend was a bad influence on me.

865
00:37:57,719 --> 00:37:59,120
Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, mind you.

866
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 7: I tried it the one time, decided I didn't like

867
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 7: the way I felt, and swore it off again. I

868
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:06,440
Speaker 7: didn't find this out from him. I found this out

869
00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:09,280
Speaker 7: from a couple of close friends inside the group, which

870
00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:11,920
Speaker 7: hurt because previously we had spoken about being upfront with

871
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:14,960
Speaker 7: each other. Finally, we go to a camping music festival

872
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:18,000
Speaker 7: that we had been planning for months. Kevin Janet, another

873
00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:20,880
Speaker 7: one of our friends, and I had pitched in together

874
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,720
Speaker 7: to get a camping spot. But just but I decided

875
00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:25,920
Speaker 7: to back out because I wanted to stay with my girlfriend.

876
00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:27,920
Speaker 6: I'm sorry, aren't you guys tired?

877
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:28,400
Speaker 5: I know?

878
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:28,840
Speaker 3: How do you?

879
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:29,000
Speaker 6: Guys?

880
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:30,759
Speaker 5: I'm tired from like doing this.

881
00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 6: Like I get it, people do it, but like are

882
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:33,360
Speaker 6: you go?

883
00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 5: Where are you?

884
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:35,800
Speaker 6: Where are you located? Where you're going to have a

885
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 6: music festival to stay every other week?

886
00:38:37,960 --> 00:38:40,959
Speaker 5: How much? Where do you work to have these music.

887
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:42,840
Speaker 6: Where do you get the days off to do this?

888
00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:46,640
Speaker 7: Yeah, exactly before the festival, I asked if my girlfriend

889
00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:48,799
Speaker 7: would be able to stay at the same campsite with us,

890
00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 7: and that decided and that end up. Before the festival,

891
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:54,359
Speaker 7: I asked if my girlfriend would be able to stay

892
00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:57,480
Speaker 7: at the same campsite with us, and that ended up

893
00:38:57,520 --> 00:38:59,960
Speaker 7: being a no. He told me that I would have

894
00:39:00,280 --> 00:39:03,720
Speaker 7: space at a friends campsite near our whole group. Before

895
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:05,920
Speaker 7: the festival, I found out that the space that they

896
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:09,520
Speaker 7: were offering was completely separated from my group by a

897
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,239
Speaker 7: thirty minute walk, so I got a car camping pass

898
00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:15,360
Speaker 7: with my girlfriend, which cost us about six hundred dollars

899
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:19,040
Speaker 7: after I had already paid one fifty dollars to stay at.

900
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:19,880
Speaker 5: The previous spot.

901
00:39:19,960 --> 00:39:21,759
Speaker 7: We get to the festival and the whole group is

902
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:23,719
Speaker 7: acting weird with my girlfriend and I, so we asked

903
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:25,600
Speaker 7: Kevin what was going on, and he told me that

904
00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:27,640
Speaker 7: he didn't know and that he was staying out of

905
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:30,200
Speaker 7: the drama. Everyone continued to act weird around us, but

906
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:31,799
Speaker 7: we ignored it and tried to make the best of

907
00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 7: the situation. On the last day of the festival, I

908
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:37,320
Speaker 7: decided to do some substances again. One of our friends

909
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:39,160
Speaker 7: had a sister pass away that day, and we all

910
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 7: decided that we were going to hold off on any

911
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 7: type of heavy conversation so we could be there to

912
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:43,880
Speaker 7: support her.

913
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:47,160
Speaker 6: Was this very night? Was this before you did substances

914
00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:50,719
Speaker 6: or after you did substances? Because right, I don't that's

915
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:51,600
Speaker 6: not a I don't know.

916
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:55,600
Speaker 5: I worry where this is going. Yeah, I have a feeling.

917
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:59,279
Speaker 7: As the substances were starting to hit, Kevin decided to

918
00:39:59,280 --> 00:40:01,480
Speaker 7: spend an hour and a half telling me about how

919
00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:03,840
Speaker 7: hurt he was and how terrible of a person I

920
00:40:04,080 --> 00:40:06,680
Speaker 7: was for making him take an uber home. He laid

921
00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:09,080
Speaker 7: into me so much that it made me break down

922
00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:11,359
Speaker 7: and almost put me in the med tent halfway through

923
00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:14,319
Speaker 7: the conversation because of how distraught I became. Luckily, my

924
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:16,600
Speaker 7: girlfriend pulled me away, sat with me, and calmed me

925
00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:21,120
Speaker 7: down before we continued talking at Kevin's insistence. Near the

926
00:40:21,239 --> 00:40:23,520
Speaker 7: end of our conversation and my girlfriend asked if he

927
00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:26,320
Speaker 7: could stop with the heavy conversations, and he got irritated

928
00:40:26,400 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 7: and walked away, so I followed him, and he continued

929
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:31,560
Speaker 7: to lay into me and tell me how I was

930
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:33,040
Speaker 7: a bad person and how he.

931
00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 5: Had told everyone in the group about how he was hurt.

932
00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 7: He said, that's what caused everyone in the group to

933
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:40,760
Speaker 7: have such a skewed perspective of my girlfriend, and I.

934
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:41,920
Speaker 6: What did the girlfriend do?

935
00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:43,120
Speaker 5: He's admitting to all of it.

936
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:46,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, hey man, what's wrong nothing.

937
00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's literally like monologuing his evil scheme.

938
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 7: He's like, yes, and I told everyone, and that's why

939
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:54,759
Speaker 7: they all think of you this way.

940
00:40:55,120 --> 00:41:00,879
Speaker 6: Yeah. Like my gosh, I oh man. One I would

941
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:04,400
Speaker 6: have been like, hey man, I'm on a substance right now. Yeah,

942
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,880
Speaker 6: let's have this talk later. I'm a I'm just not

943
00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:08,759
Speaker 6: in a good I'm not in a good mental state

944
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 6: right now. Yeah. Sure, my vibe is not being vibed

945
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 6: out right, and you're you are you are verbally attacking

946
00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:18,200
Speaker 6: me right now, exactly at a music festival out of

947
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:18,800
Speaker 6: all places.

948
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:21,720
Speaker 7: Right, It's like those trips in her videos where it's

949
00:41:21,840 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 7: just like nightmare.

950
00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:24,200
Speaker 6: N this is literally nightmare.

951
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:27,640
Speaker 5: Yeah. So he basically lied the entire time.

952
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:30,200
Speaker 7: He forced me into a bad trip and then laid

953
00:41:30,320 --> 00:41:32,759
Speaker 7: into me even though he could see the damage that

954
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 7: it was causing me. His whole situation made my girlfriend

955
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:39,200
Speaker 7: very uncomfortable and she started to feel ostracized, so we

956
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:40,759
Speaker 7: ended up leaving the group for the rest of the

957
00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:43,399
Speaker 7: night so we could actually have a decent time, even

958
00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:45,480
Speaker 7: though we wanted to be there for our friend who

959
00:41:45,520 --> 00:41:49,360
Speaker 7: was going through a difficult situation. After the festival had ended,

960
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 7: Janet and I sat down and talked about everything. Then

961
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:55,160
Speaker 7: my girlfriend and Janet sat down and talked about their

962
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:56,960
Speaker 7: animosity and had a good conversation.

963
00:41:57,480 --> 00:41:58,480
Speaker 5: We all connected and.

964
00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:01,560
Speaker 7: Talked about how Kevin had acted during this week. Kevin

965
00:42:01,560 --> 00:42:03,680
Speaker 7: had forced Janet and the other girl in the tent

966
00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:07,040
Speaker 7: to set up their campsite alone because quote I have

967
00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:09,400
Speaker 7: no idea how to pitch a tent, and Janet and

968
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,320
Speaker 7: I talked. She confirmed that Kevin had been going around

969
00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 7: smearing my girlfriend's name because he had become emotionally attached

970
00:42:16,040 --> 00:42:18,239
Speaker 7: to me and was jealous that I was spending so

971
00:42:18,320 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 7: much time with her and not with him.

972
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 5: He had heavily implied.

973
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 7: That I was a regular user to the group and

974
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:27,319
Speaker 7: told everyone he spent all his money on substances and

975
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:30,200
Speaker 7: his girlfriend is turning him into a terrible person. I

976
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,759
Speaker 7: had learned all of this and was already upset, but

977
00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:35,319
Speaker 7: I let my emotions calm down and used Chat to

978
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:37,880
Speaker 7: be t to craft an amicable response to convey my

979
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:39,040
Speaker 7: feelings without attacking him.

980
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,759
Speaker 5: That's crazy, the fact that.

981
00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:43,920
Speaker 6: You need to rely on that to Okay, I mean,

982
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:45,680
Speaker 6: I get it, do what she gotta do.

983
00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:48,680
Speaker 5: But also, maybe let's like, let's let's talk about that.

984
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:52,960
Speaker 6: Let's talk about that's another situation, Like you shouldn't need

985
00:42:53,080 --> 00:42:55,400
Speaker 6: that to talk about how you feel.

986
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:58,520
Speaker 7: Yeah, at least let's maybe learn from this and how

987
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 7: Chat to be te did it and then not use

988
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:01,440
Speaker 7: it in the future.

989
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:02,280
Speaker 5: But I digress.

990
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:04,439
Speaker 7: A couple of days later, my girlfriend went to get

991
00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:05,799
Speaker 7: her hair done by one of the girls in our

992
00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:08,800
Speaker 7: friend group who is a hairdresser. My girlfriend was informed

993
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:11,920
Speaker 7: that the entire weekend, Kevin was telling everyone that she

994
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,120
Speaker 7: told him that she wanted to be single for a

995
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 7: nocturnal and implying that she was trying.

996
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 4: To cheat on me.

997
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 7: Oh my gosh. And there is a little bit more

998
00:43:22,040 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 7: to the story. But that's such a wild rumor to start.

999
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:28,120
Speaker 6: Kevin likes his spread rumors by iget. But remember at

1000
00:43:28,160 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 6: the beginning of the story, Yes, the attitude problem Kevin has.

1001
00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:37,920
Speaker 9: Dude, see that really does happen, Like I've had, I've literally,

1002
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:40,080
Speaker 9: I've had friends where it's just like, well, I mean

1003
00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:41,800
Speaker 9: I don't really like how they talk to that person,

1004
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:43,799
Speaker 9: but like they have to figure that out.

1005
00:43:43,920 --> 00:43:46,200
Speaker 7: I feel like I can't really say something and it's

1006
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:47,400
Speaker 7: also not directed at me.

1007
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:50,200
Speaker 5: But then guess what happens a little bit later.

1008
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,000
Speaker 6: It's got to come to you. Sooner or later. You

1009
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 6: have a friend that treats waiters or like hostesses or

1010
00:43:57,360 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 6: or anybody relationships, anybody just negatively where like it's just

1011
00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:04,200
Speaker 6: like that doesn't make any sense, or you shouldn't talk

1012
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,279
Speaker 6: to that person like that. Yeah, if they can do

1013
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:08,480
Speaker 6: that to them, they can do that to you.

1014
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 7: Yeah, you probably it probably would be a good idea

1015
00:44:11,239 --> 00:44:13,120
Speaker 7: to like call it out in the moment so that

1016
00:44:13,719 --> 00:44:15,480
Speaker 7: they know that you're not gonna put up with it.

1017
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:20,080
Speaker 6: Yeah, boy oh boy. But not a fan of Kevin,

1018
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:22,120
Speaker 6: but I will say I think the moral of the

1019
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,360
Speaker 6: story is just I mean, yes, you were trying to

1020
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:27,440
Speaker 6: communicate Ope. I feel like when he started spreading rumors

1021
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:29,799
Speaker 6: about the ride share stuff like his trauma, I would

1022
00:44:29,840 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 6: have reached out to him and be like, hey, man,

1023
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:33,280
Speaker 6: can we have a conversation because I've been hearing stuff

1024
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 6: from people. What's what's going on? Like I feel like

1025
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:39,520
Speaker 6: there's so much tension between us and between my girlfriend.

1026
00:44:40,120 --> 00:44:44,920
Speaker 6: What is happening? Like, let's let's squash the beef, Like what,

1027
00:44:44,719 --> 00:44:46,319
Speaker 6: what's what's going on? Right?

1028
00:44:46,360 --> 00:44:48,920
Speaker 5: Like if you're not going to communicate first, I will.

1029
00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:51,759
Speaker 6: Yeah, exactly, Like it's like the Ali branch, Like I'm

1030
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 6: hearing things from you and I care about you in

1031
00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:58,839
Speaker 6: our friendship. What's going on? And I know, like it's

1032
00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:01,000
Speaker 6: like I have to be the bigger many. It's like, yeah,

1033
00:45:01,080 --> 00:45:03,360
Speaker 6: we're adults, we can do that exactly.

1034
00:45:03,360 --> 00:45:04,719
Speaker 5: I mean that is being the bigger man.

1035
00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:06,879
Speaker 7: I feel like it is not just like oh, I'm

1036
00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 7: gonna like let them talk about it.

1037
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:09,400
Speaker 5: I'm not gonna say it.

1038
00:45:09,520 --> 00:45:11,359
Speaker 6: I was like, oh, it's okay. It's like at this point,

1039
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:15,000
Speaker 6: it's like this is what's the point of this? And

1040
00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 6: I mean you are understand what the point is, but

1041
00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:19,799
Speaker 6: now it's gone to a point of it just time.

1042
00:45:19,840 --> 00:45:21,759
Speaker 6: There's a time and place for everything, and you like

1043
00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 6: obviously arguing at a music festival, and on top of

1044
00:45:25,560 --> 00:45:27,719
Speaker 6: that all these other things, and on top of that,

1045
00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:30,920
Speaker 6: you're on substances, right, not the time and place.

1046
00:45:31,120 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 7: Not the time and place, he most likely did this

1047
00:45:33,680 --> 00:45:35,160
Speaker 7: knowing that if it got back to me, it would

1048
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:38,880
Speaker 7: absolutely destroy me mentally and emotionally and damage my relationship.

1049
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:41,440
Speaker 7: Before my girlfriend told me this, I had tried to

1050
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:44,520
Speaker 7: call Kevin and was immediately sent to voicemail multiple times.

1051
00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:47,080
Speaker 7: I figured out that he had blocked my number, blocked

1052
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 7: me in all social media, and basically was trying to

1053
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:53,680
Speaker 7: wash his hands of me and my girlfriend. Now back

1054
00:45:53,719 --> 00:45:57,319
Speaker 7: to the original question, Would I be the a hole

1055
00:45:57,400 --> 00:45:59,840
Speaker 7: for wanting to expose all of this and clear this

1056
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:03,840
Speaker 7: and give everyone a perspective of the conniving and downright

1057
00:46:03,880 --> 00:46:07,439
Speaker 7: disrespectful way he treated both of us and the manipulative

1058
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:10,040
Speaker 7: way that he went about painting both of us as

1059
00:46:10,160 --> 00:46:13,600
Speaker 7: terrible people that don't care about our friends. Or do

1060
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:15,800
Speaker 7: I have every right to clear the air and show

1061
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:18,799
Speaker 7: everyone how manipulative this entire situation is.

1062
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:22,480
Speaker 5: That's the end of the story. What do we say

1063
00:46:22,520 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 5: to those questions?

1064
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:26,760
Speaker 6: Oh, I definitely say clear the air for sure, Like, hey,

1065
00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:30,560
Speaker 6: these are these are false rumors? And you know what

1066
00:46:30,840 --> 00:46:33,200
Speaker 6: if if it is going around friend groups that you

1067
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:36,200
Speaker 6: do hang out with, I mean, yeah, you do you

1068
00:46:36,239 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 6: do what you like? If people like we're like, oh,

1069
00:46:39,040 --> 00:46:41,480
Speaker 6: I heard rumors about Angie. I heard rumors about Keon right,

1070
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:45,399
Speaker 6: and I'm like, uh, no, those aren't true. Uh who

1071
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:47,240
Speaker 6: do you get that from? You're oh, from that person,

1072
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:51,719
Speaker 6: So that's a lie. I would definitely kill clear that,

1073
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,120
Speaker 6: especially if it's because of not just you but also

1074
00:46:54,160 --> 00:46:54,720
Speaker 6: your girlfriend.

1075
00:46:54,840 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1076
00:46:55,120 --> 00:46:58,280
Speaker 6: People were literally ostracizing you guys at a music festival

1077
00:46:58,320 --> 00:47:01,759
Speaker 6: because an acting weird around her and you Yeah, because

1078
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:02,840
Speaker 6: of this, you don't like that.

1079
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:05,320
Speaker 1: Hey, it's Sam. We're going to get back to these stories.

1080
00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:07,360
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1081
00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:10,600
Speaker 6: I cut off my friend without an explanation because he

1082
00:47:10,680 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 6: exploited my kindness.

1083
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:13,680
Speaker 5: Snip snip witch.

1084
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:17,479
Speaker 6: My former friend thirty male and I, thirty female, met

1085
00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:20,160
Speaker 6: the first day of college. Dorms were set up as

1086
00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:23,399
Speaker 6: townhouses with five rooms and they were co ed. We

1087
00:47:23,400 --> 00:47:25,839
Speaker 6: were in the same dormhouse. By the way, this comes

1088
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:29,000
Speaker 6: from user apprehensive count five ninety seven. And if you

1089
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:30,560
Speaker 6: want to submit your own stories, go to the r

1090
00:47:30,640 --> 00:47:34,200
Speaker 6: slash Okay storytime sub breddits. I'm Keon and I'm Manjie,

1091
00:47:34,440 --> 00:47:37,000
Speaker 6: and we're here to give good advice. Goofily, but we

1092
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:39,279
Speaker 6: don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd

1093
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:41,480
Speaker 6: do in these situations, so let us know what you

1094
00:47:41,520 --> 00:47:44,680
Speaker 6: would do in the comments, and Opie says. Orientation was

1095
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:47,200
Speaker 6: three weeks set up as backpacking trips for most, but

1096
00:47:47,239 --> 00:47:49,279
Speaker 6: we both had joint issues that made us unable to

1097
00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:52,960
Speaker 6: do that, so our orientation was just doing various volunteer

1098
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:55,880
Speaker 6: work around town. We grew to be close friends pretty

1099
00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:58,760
Speaker 6: quickly after moving out of the dorms. We stayed close

1100
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:01,600
Speaker 6: friends this can for ten years.

1101
00:48:02,239 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 5: Nice.

1102
00:48:03,120 --> 00:48:05,680
Speaker 6: We both considered each other our closest friend, and our

1103
00:48:05,719 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 6: parents and siblings considered each other family. Nice. He always

1104
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:12,640
Speaker 6: had challenges with finances. I didn't until the past year.

1105
00:48:12,800 --> 00:48:16,520
Speaker 6: My current financial struggles are unrelated. Though he fairly regularly

1106
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:19,320
Speaker 6: asked to borrow money to help cover rent, groceries, et cetera.

1107
00:48:20,200 --> 00:48:23,399
Speaker 6: I had the ability to help, so I did. One day,

1108
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,320
Speaker 6: he texted me to tell his partner thirty five non binary,

1109
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:29,520
Speaker 6: had their car totaled, asking if I could drive them

1110
00:48:29,520 --> 00:48:31,400
Speaker 6: to work the next day while they figured out what

1111
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:33,800
Speaker 6: to do. I was with my dad at the time.

1112
00:48:33,960 --> 00:48:37,080
Speaker 6: He saw my face, questioned and I told him. He

1113
00:48:37,160 --> 00:48:39,239
Speaker 6: offered his car up he had two at the time,

1114
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:42,680
Speaker 6: for a temporary solution, no charge. Expecting it to be

1115
00:48:42,719 --> 00:48:45,200
Speaker 6: a few weeks. I towed the car to his house

1116
00:48:45,239 --> 00:48:47,160
Speaker 6: to drop it off and told them the three rules.

1117
00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 6: One run it through a wash every once in a

1118
00:48:49,640 --> 00:48:52,759
Speaker 6: while to preserve the paint and trim. Two keep the

1119
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:55,839
Speaker 6: tank above one quarter to preserve the fuel pump. And

1120
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 6: three let me know what it's due for maintenance when,

1121
00:48:58,080 --> 00:49:00,440
Speaker 6: including which mile to do that at or if any

1122
00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:02,120
Speaker 6: repairs were needed, and I would take care of it.

1123
00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:05,640
Speaker 6: Twoish weeks turned into tewish months. Oh boy. I kept

1124
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:08,360
Speaker 6: asking for updates because my dad wanted to sell the car.

1125
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:10,439
Speaker 6: He kept hulling me they were still going to court

1126
00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:12,600
Speaker 6: to try to get the wasted driver that hit their

1127
00:49:12,640 --> 00:49:15,640
Speaker 6: car to pay for the damages. Ten months after bringing

1128
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:17,360
Speaker 6: the car to him, my dad needed to sell the

1129
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:20,080
Speaker 6: car due to financial strain. He was paying insurance and

1130
00:49:20,160 --> 00:49:23,120
Speaker 6: registration on a car he hadn't seen in almost a

1131
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:26,440
Speaker 6: year and he couldn't afford it anymore. I gave my

1132
00:49:26,480 --> 00:49:28,520
Speaker 6: friend an ample warning that I'd be taking my dad's

1133
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:31,360
Speaker 6: car back when the insurance and registration were up for

1134
00:49:31,440 --> 00:49:35,640
Speaker 6: renewal and told him the date. Due to work and whatnot,

1135
00:49:35,719 --> 00:49:39,480
Speaker 6: I hadn't visited. I lived two hours away in six months.

1136
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:41,560
Speaker 6: When I got there to pick up the car, the

1137
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:46,200
Speaker 6: clear coat was peeling, the trim was all dry rotted,

1138
00:49:46,719 --> 00:49:52,600
Speaker 6: the gas tank was completely empty. It started sputtered and

1139
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:57,520
Speaker 6: passed away the car and the check engine light was flashing.

1140
00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:00,799
Speaker 6: I asked, and he said he didn't not wash it

1141
00:50:00,840 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 6: in the entire ten months. He said, the check engine

1142
00:50:03,760 --> 00:50:07,440
Speaker 6: light had been flashing for three months. Guys, but the

1143
00:50:07,480 --> 00:50:10,680
Speaker 6: gas is really what got me, he said. We drove

1144
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 6: it around a bit to run it to empty. That's

1145
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:16,719
Speaker 6: what he gets for effing us over by taking our

1146
00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:20,600
Speaker 6: car away. They already had another vehicle, his partner's dad

1147
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 6: get to them a car. I had no energy. I

1148
00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:26,600
Speaker 6: spent the night before in the er, worked all day,

1149
00:50:27,040 --> 00:50:29,359
Speaker 6: and still had to tow a car two hours down

1150
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:33,680
Speaker 6: a winding mountain. So I got it loaded up and left.

1151
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:37,319
Speaker 6: I fixed the car, filled the tank, replaced the fuel pump,

1152
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:40,239
Speaker 6: and replaced the trim. The check engine light was for

1153
00:50:40,280 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 6: the transmission. It was badly dented and had a puncture.

1154
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:47,360
Speaker 6: It had been running with no fluid for months. I

1155
00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:50,200
Speaker 6: got a new pan and some other transmission parts, fixed

1156
00:50:50,200 --> 00:50:53,000
Speaker 6: it and got it running again. My dad was out

1157
00:50:53,040 --> 00:50:55,439
Speaker 6: of town visiting family that week, so he never knew

1158
00:50:55,440 --> 00:50:57,320
Speaker 6: about the damage. He gave me a power of attorney

1159
00:50:57,400 --> 00:50:59,759
Speaker 6: to sell it for him. It got eight k less

1160
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:02,400
Speaker 6: than the offer before loaning to them because of the paint.

1161
00:51:03,040 --> 00:51:06,000
Speaker 6: I cashed the check and added ak of my own money,

1162
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,839
Speaker 6: just so my dad wouldn't have the nicest thing he'd

1163
00:51:08,880 --> 00:51:11,480
Speaker 6: done for someone in a long time come back to

1164
00:51:11,520 --> 00:51:14,000
Speaker 6: bite him in the butt. About a week after picking

1165
00:51:14,040 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 6: up the car, he needed help moving. He was being

1166
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:20,799
Speaker 6: wrongfully evicted. His partner had been arrested for false accusation

1167
00:51:21,080 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 6: unreleased on bails. Crazy They had to be out of

1168
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 6: the house by the end of the day. I figured,

1169
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 6: e fitt whatever, I have nothing better to do, and

1170
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:31,400
Speaker 6: I have a few things at his house that I

1171
00:51:31,480 --> 00:51:34,279
Speaker 6: loaned him that I wanted back, so I drove up

1172
00:51:34,320 --> 00:51:41,239
Speaker 6: to help. Their apartment was absolutely disgusting Florida ceiling trash.

1173
00:51:41,280 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 6: Twenty seven cats and two dogs had been living in

1174
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:46,920
Speaker 6: a tiny apartment. They were all fed, but the litter box,

1175
00:51:47,120 --> 00:51:51,080
Speaker 6: one small one, was overflowing. There was cat urine and

1176
00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:55,239
Speaker 6: feces everywhere. The animals were already removed and were at

1177
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:58,520
Speaker 6: his partner's dad's house while moving, but they fully intended

1178
00:51:58,600 --> 00:52:00,840
Speaker 6: to keep the cats in dogs living with them in

1179
00:52:00,880 --> 00:52:03,720
Speaker 6: the tiny car given to them by the partner's dad.

1180
00:52:04,719 --> 00:52:08,040
Speaker 6: I still helped again to try to find things I'd

1181
00:52:08,040 --> 00:52:12,239
Speaker 6: loaned him they could be cleaned. Okay, I found out

1182
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:16,080
Speaker 6: that his partner had thrown the things away knowing they

1183
00:52:16,080 --> 00:52:19,759
Speaker 6: were mine because they bought their own stuff. They bought

1184
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,120
Speaker 6: their own things that I had let them have on them.

1185
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:25,120
Speaker 5: Gonna steal those things honestly, Like, oh.

1186
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:27,800
Speaker 6: That's cool, I'm gonna take that. Yeah, I'm gonna take that. Yeah,

1187
00:52:27,840 --> 00:52:29,560
Speaker 6: oh I have one of those. I take one of

1188
00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:29,919
Speaker 6: those two.

1189
00:52:30,080 --> 00:52:33,200
Speaker 7: Yeah exactly, I'm fully just like taking those. Oh you

1190
00:52:33,320 --> 00:52:36,080
Speaker 7: threw away my stuff. So thanks for buying it from

1191
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:37,520
Speaker 7: me again, thanks for buying me a new one.

1192
00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:38,279
Speaker 5: Appreciate it.

1193
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:40,480
Speaker 6: I don't think these people understand when people give you

1194
00:52:40,520 --> 00:52:45,040
Speaker 6: stuff when you're when you're getting alone, that doesn't mean

1195
00:52:45,040 --> 00:52:47,279
Speaker 6: it's yours outright. It means it's like, hey, I'm just

1196
00:52:47,280 --> 00:52:48,359
Speaker 6: gonna let you borrow it.

1197
00:52:48,400 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 7: And also like even if you if you thought that,

1198
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:55,960
Speaker 7: like clearly they're acting like that's the case. But if

1199
00:52:56,080 --> 00:52:58,440
Speaker 7: you think that that's the case, and something that is

1200
00:52:58,480 --> 00:53:01,560
Speaker 7: being loaned to you is actually given, why would you

1201
00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:03,319
Speaker 7: buy a new one because you have one?

1202
00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:05,480
Speaker 6: It's insane. There were a lot of items they'd never

1203
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:07,760
Speaker 6: even taken out of the packaging, a lot of various

1204
00:53:07,840 --> 00:53:11,400
Speaker 6: kitchen appliances and household items. They kept offering them to me,

1205
00:53:11,760 --> 00:53:14,719
Speaker 6: but I had no need for those items. Then they

1206
00:53:14,719 --> 00:53:17,880
Speaker 6: offered me a blender, a really nice and expensive Ninjab.

1207
00:53:18,600 --> 00:53:20,880
Speaker 6: I have a nicer, fancy blender and didn't need it,

1208
00:53:20,920 --> 00:53:24,080
Speaker 6: but said I don't, but my dad's blender broke and

1209
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:26,560
Speaker 6: he needs a new one. Him and his partner looked

1210
00:53:26,560 --> 00:53:29,200
Speaker 6: at each other, and his partner said, well, actually we

1211
00:53:29,640 --> 00:53:31,759
Speaker 6: need that. I thought nothing of it until I saw

1212
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:35,680
Speaker 6: them walk the brand new, still in the box, never opened,

1213
00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:40,120
Speaker 6: expensive blender right past their moving truck, straight to the

1214
00:53:40,239 --> 00:53:46,120
Speaker 6: dumpster outside. What the f dude? My friend said, well,

1215
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:48,799
Speaker 6: we'd rather throw it out than let that piece of

1216
00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:51,640
Speaker 6: crap have it. I said goodbye and left. I had

1217
00:53:51,680 --> 00:53:55,520
Speaker 6: an itch, so I looked at public records. The crash

1218
00:53:56,000 --> 00:53:59,600
Speaker 6: never happened. His partner didn't have insurance and was three

1219
00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:04,160
Speaker 6: months before on payments. Their car was repossessed. The eviction

1220
00:54:04,480 --> 00:54:07,160
Speaker 6: was because the partner and him were smoking devils let

1221
00:54:07,239 --> 00:54:10,960
Speaker 6: us in their apartment, which maintenance had on video because

1222
00:54:10,960 --> 00:54:15,200
Speaker 6: they were smoking while he was fixing their sync, and

1223
00:54:15,280 --> 00:54:18,440
Speaker 6: the partner's arrest was for assaulting the maintenance guy when

1224
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:21,520
Speaker 6: they got the eviction notice. They were caught on camera

1225
00:54:21,560 --> 00:54:25,400
Speaker 6: as well and had multiple witnesses who also took video.

1226
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 6: About a month later of not responding to his countless

1227
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 6: text and calls, I blocked him on everything. It was

1228
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:34,160
Speaker 6: between that or absolutely tearing into him. But that wasn't

1229
00:54:34,160 --> 00:54:36,359
Speaker 6: worth my time or energy. There is a little bit

1230
00:54:36,520 --> 00:54:42,120
Speaker 6: left to discuss, Angie. If you if you were I again,

1231
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:45,040
Speaker 6: I already said my piece. I would tear into my

1232
00:54:45,120 --> 00:54:48,279
Speaker 6: friend and block him. Then I would block them like

1233
00:54:48,480 --> 00:54:50,720
Speaker 6: you suck. I don't want you in my life anymore. Bye,

1234
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:53,360
Speaker 6: I get it. You're you're doing the better the bigger

1235
00:54:53,400 --> 00:54:56,320
Speaker 6: man thing where you're just walking away like just complete

1236
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:59,640
Speaker 6: clothes and block. That's great. You can do that. I am.

1237
00:55:00,040 --> 00:55:01,160
Speaker 6: I would be so upset.

1238
00:55:01,800 --> 00:55:06,359
Speaker 7: I would be very upset, and I would want to

1239
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:08,279
Speaker 7: do that. I would want to tear into them. I

1240
00:55:08,280 --> 00:55:09,799
Speaker 7: would want them to give them money back. I would

1241
00:55:09,840 --> 00:55:12,839
Speaker 7: want to take that that blender just right in front

1242
00:55:12,880 --> 00:55:13,160
Speaker 7: of them.

1243
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:14,919
Speaker 5: I would want to steal other things.

1244
00:55:15,280 --> 00:55:19,319
Speaker 7: But I worry about that information that after they got

1245
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:21,120
Speaker 7: the eviction notice they attacked them.

1246
00:55:21,200 --> 00:55:25,160
Speaker 6: All that stuff is insane.

1247
00:55:24,719 --> 00:55:27,480
Speaker 7: Because now, I mean, what if he attacks you, and

1248
00:55:27,520 --> 00:55:29,480
Speaker 7: then I think, like, if you just ask for the

1249
00:55:29,520 --> 00:55:31,360
Speaker 7: money back, I feel like he's just going to attack you.

1250
00:55:31,640 --> 00:55:36,200
Speaker 7: I feel like if uh, yeah or she actually well

1251
00:55:36,239 --> 00:55:36,920
Speaker 7: it's both of them.

1252
00:55:37,239 --> 00:55:43,520
Speaker 6: Well, I think Pie is a she. I'm pretty sure.

1253
00:55:43,480 --> 00:55:47,720
Speaker 7: I think Opie's male, and then the friend is female,

1254
00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:49,880
Speaker 7: friend's partner non binary.

1255
00:55:50,160 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 6: Sometimes.

1256
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:55,759
Speaker 7: Anyway, these two scumbags, I think they're I feel like

1257
00:55:55,760 --> 00:55:57,359
Speaker 7: they're going to well I guess no, he said he

1258
00:55:57,440 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 7: attacked I forget. But anyway, these two scumbags, they are dangerous.

1259
00:56:04,520 --> 00:56:08,040
Speaker 7: I would worry about talking to them alone. I feel like,

1260
00:56:08,120 --> 00:56:10,279
Speaker 7: if you really want the money back and you want

1261
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:13,760
Speaker 7: this stuff like for the car, then you know, gather

1262
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:17,960
Speaker 7: your screenshots of conversations and take them to court. Honestly,

1263
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:19,600
Speaker 7: I feel like that's the only way you're actually gonna

1264
00:56:19,600 --> 00:56:22,799
Speaker 7: get your money back. But obviously, you know, it is

1265
00:56:22,880 --> 00:56:27,080
Speaker 7: still a worry of your your physical safety if if

1266
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:29,840
Speaker 7: that was part of it, Like so, I don't know,

1267
00:56:29,920 --> 00:56:32,279
Speaker 7: for your safety, it's probably best to just leave it.

1268
00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:35,880
Speaker 7: But at the same time, I mean, that's just so,

1269
00:56:36,520 --> 00:56:37,359
Speaker 7: that's so effed up.

1270
00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:40,480
Speaker 6: Yeah, no, I'm I'm upset for you, O pie, this

1271
00:56:40,560 --> 00:56:43,719
Speaker 6: is crazy, But let's finish up the story. Now. Two

1272
00:56:43,760 --> 00:56:46,359
Speaker 6: years later, I've started feeling guilty for not explaining the

1273
00:56:46,480 --> 00:56:49,880
Speaker 6: end of a decade long friendship. Not because I know

1274
00:56:49,920 --> 00:56:51,840
Speaker 6: how it feels to lose a friend with no explanation,

1275
00:56:52,360 --> 00:56:54,359
Speaker 6: but because I feel like he deserves to have it

1276
00:56:54,400 --> 00:56:56,640
Speaker 6: thoroughly explained to him. How much of a piece of

1277
00:56:56,760 --> 00:56:59,840
Speaker 6: crap he is. I also want an answer for what,

1278
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,640
Speaker 6: but in ten years of friendship, did I ever do

1279
00:57:02,880 --> 00:57:05,440
Speaker 6: to make him think that one hundred percent of the

1280
00:57:05,520 --> 00:57:08,359
Speaker 6: damages to the car wouldn't fall on me instead of

1281
00:57:08,360 --> 00:57:11,719
Speaker 6: my dad? Because if I give off that image of

1282
00:57:11,760 --> 00:57:14,920
Speaker 6: someone who would let someone f over my family, I

1283
00:57:15,040 --> 00:57:18,040
Speaker 6: want to know so I could be better. I still

1284
00:57:18,040 --> 00:57:21,120
Speaker 6: have one platform I can message him on. I've already unblocked,

1285
00:57:21,120 --> 00:57:24,640
Speaker 6: and I'm drafting what I want to say. So would

1286
00:57:24,680 --> 00:57:26,360
Speaker 6: I be the a hole if I follow through in

1287
00:57:26,440 --> 00:57:30,160
Speaker 6: explaining the end of that friendship? We have some comments here,

1288
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:34,080
Speaker 6: I don't think so before we end the comments, I think, yeah,

1289
00:57:34,120 --> 00:57:36,200
Speaker 6: I would have done it before, like before you blocked him.

1290
00:57:36,200 --> 00:57:38,400
Speaker 6: I'm like, so, I'm ending this friendship and he's gonna

1291
00:57:38,440 --> 00:57:42,040
Speaker 6: be like, why am I Do you really need to do?

1292
00:57:42,080 --> 00:57:44,440
Speaker 6: You really need to be just spelled off for you? Yeah,

1293
00:57:44,640 --> 00:57:47,120
Speaker 6: Come at number one, you would not be the a hole.

1294
00:57:47,440 --> 00:57:49,160
Speaker 6: If you think it makes you feel better, then by

1295
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:52,040
Speaker 6: all means right to him. But you need to be

1296
00:57:52,080 --> 00:57:56,120
Speaker 6: prepared for possible scenarios. Best outcome you never hear from

1297
00:57:56,120 --> 00:57:58,720
Speaker 6: this a hole again. Another possibility. He becomes all worked

1298
00:57:58,760 --> 00:58:01,960
Speaker 6: up thinking about a magic in slights and starts pestering you,

1299
00:58:02,440 --> 00:58:06,400
Speaker 6: scratching your car, ordering crap to your address, et cetera,

1300
00:58:06,560 --> 00:58:11,200
Speaker 6: et cetera. Another possibility. He contacts you all remorseful, tells

1301
00:58:11,240 --> 00:58:14,000
Speaker 6: you how sorry he is. It was his partner and

1302
00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:16,960
Speaker 6: the substances that made him do it, et cetera, et cetera.

1303
00:58:17,440 --> 00:58:19,760
Speaker 6: Your heart softens and you let him back into your life.

1304
00:58:19,840 --> 00:58:23,320
Speaker 6: He reverts to being an a hole. Heartache follows. You

1305
00:58:23,360 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 6: block him, but only after he costs you lots of

1306
00:58:26,560 --> 00:58:29,920
Speaker 6: money once more. Come a number two. To be honest,

1307
00:58:29,960 --> 00:58:31,720
Speaker 6: if you think you are doing this just for the

1308
00:58:31,760 --> 00:58:34,560
Speaker 6: sake of him, to know, do it, get over it?

1309
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:37,640
Speaker 6: But I like, but like, I hope he doesn't get

1310
00:58:37,680 --> 00:58:40,360
Speaker 6: back at you for something and you should also save

1311
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:42,840
Speaker 6: yourself from that f up of your mental piece if

1312
00:58:42,880 --> 00:58:45,160
Speaker 6: he does so, if you can handle that, tell him

1313
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:48,720
Speaker 6: otherwise don't because if you can't handle it, it's not

1314
00:58:49,080 --> 00:58:51,320
Speaker 6: worth it. It's not worth your f and piece when

1315
00:58:51,360 --> 00:58:55,040
Speaker 6: it's been two years already. Oh, PE's propries, there's nothing

1316
00:58:55,080 --> 00:58:57,880
Speaker 6: he can say that would disturb my piece. Smiley face reply.

1317
00:58:58,480 --> 00:59:00,760
Speaker 6: That is not convincing, since it has been two years

1318
00:59:00,760 --> 00:59:03,760
Speaker 6: of no contact, and yet you are still fantasizing about talking,

1319
00:59:04,040 --> 00:59:08,280
Speaker 6: explaining and getting back at him and then that story. Yeah,

1320
00:59:08,280 --> 00:59:10,720
Speaker 6: it's like you've been in the shower thoughts of like

1321
00:59:10,760 --> 00:59:13,120
Speaker 6: having that argument with him, Like yeah, so I'm gonna

1322
00:59:13,120 --> 00:59:14,360
Speaker 6: tell him this and this is how it's gonna go.

1323
00:59:14,480 --> 00:59:16,600
Speaker 6: The scenarios gonna play like this, and I mean the

1324
00:59:16,680 --> 00:59:18,520
Speaker 6: shower listening to like cool music.

1325
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:20,360
Speaker 5: But yeah, yeah, I don't know.

1326
00:59:20,440 --> 00:59:23,360
Speaker 7: I mean, I think, write it out for sure what

1327
00:59:23,440 --> 00:59:26,160
Speaker 7: you want to say, but then give us some thought

1328
00:59:26,280 --> 00:59:28,640
Speaker 7: and then see if you still want to actually send it,

1329
00:59:28,680 --> 00:59:30,120
Speaker 7: because I've done that before.

1330
00:59:30,200 --> 00:59:32,920
Speaker 5: But then it's like, ah, yeah, you shouldn't actually say that.

1331
00:59:33,000 --> 00:59:34,600
Speaker 6: At the end of the day, what is it going

1332
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:37,040
Speaker 6: to do for you? What is it going to do

1333
00:59:37,080 --> 00:59:37,400
Speaker 6: for them,