WEBVTT - The Beauty of Pride 0:00:11.800 --> 0:00:14.440 Good morning, peeps, and welcome to Okay F Daily with 0:00:14.560 --> 0:00:19.959 Meet Your Girl, Danielle Moody recording from Washington, d C. Folks. 0:00:20.079 --> 0:00:24.840 I had the extraordinary honor of attending Pride at the 0:00:24.880 --> 0:00:28.520 White House this past week, and I will tell you that, 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:32.559 as hard as I go for this administration, because of 0:00:32.640 --> 0:00:37.000 their lack of understanding urgency of this moment and the 0:00:37.040 --> 0:00:40.440 ability to actually save our democracy, I will say this, 0:00:41.280 --> 0:00:45.080 there is nothing quite like being with a group of 0:00:45.479 --> 0:00:51.600 queer Americans who have dedicated their lives to advancing LGBTQ 0:00:51.800 --> 0:00:56.400 equality and having that be recognized and not only recognized, 0:00:56.440 --> 0:01:00.560 but celebrated by the President of the United States. This 0:01:00.640 --> 0:01:04.319 is the first Pride in person that we have had 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:08.679 since the Trump administration. When the Trump administration came into 0:01:08.720 --> 0:01:17.800 office following Obama, they erased any visibility, any recognition, any honoring, 0:01:17.920 --> 0:01:22.280 celebration of LGBTQ Americans. As a matter of fact, they 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:26.640 took us off the website all together. Not only did 0:01:26.640 --> 0:01:29.319 they take us off of the website, but they then 0:01:29.520 --> 0:01:36.520 proceeded to create policies that would harm our community. We've 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:41.679 seen over the last year plus hundreds hundreds of anti 0:01:41.760 --> 0:01:44.240 trans bills that we've talked about on this show, and 0:01:44.280 --> 0:01:48.120 you've heard me talk about on other shows. And so 0:01:48.200 --> 0:01:52.240 to take a day, to take an afternoon to honor 0:01:53.200 --> 0:01:57.120 and celebrate what it means to have pride, what it 0:01:57.160 --> 0:02:02.600 means to be a proud LGBTQ American is a beautiful thing. 0:02:02.960 --> 0:02:07.080 To walk through once again the halls of the White House, 0:02:07.120 --> 0:02:10.840 to take in history and understand, by virtue of my 0:02:10.960 --> 0:02:14.920 presence there, I am a part of creating a new history, 0:02:15.240 --> 0:02:20.040 creating a new story. So to walk the halls again 0:02:20.200 --> 0:02:24.320 and to look and see the pictures and to greet 0:02:24.440 --> 0:02:29.919 old friends and new in these beautiful, beautiful halls, it 0:02:29.960 --> 0:02:33.400 was overwhelming. And I didn't realize. You all know that 0:02:33.440 --> 0:02:38.440 I was at Kabej's commemoration in the Rose Garden a 0:02:38.480 --> 0:02:42.360 couple of months ago for her being named to the 0:02:42.400 --> 0:02:46.519 Supreme Court, but I hadn't been inside the White House 0:02:46.680 --> 0:02:50.120 in quite some time, and so it was like a 0:02:50.160 --> 0:02:53.840 flood of these beautiful memories coming back of a time 0:02:53.880 --> 0:02:57.800 that has long since passed. And I was sat around 0:02:57.840 --> 0:03:01.520 with friends this week and I said, you know, there's 0:03:01.520 --> 0:03:04.919 a thing that I do regret about the Obama years. 0:03:05.880 --> 0:03:07.600 And they said, what, you know, what is it that 0:03:07.639 --> 0:03:11.760 you regret, And I say, I regret that we felt 0:03:11.880 --> 0:03:15.400 at that time that this was going to be the 0:03:15.440 --> 0:03:20.880 beginning of something new. We felt the power, we felt 0:03:20.919 --> 0:03:24.640 the community, we felt the connectivity, and we thought that 0:03:24.680 --> 0:03:28.560 the Obama years were the beginning. And frankly they should 0:03:28.560 --> 0:03:31.839 have been, but we also should have been a lot 0:03:31.919 --> 0:03:35.440 more present. And that's where I have regret is that 0:03:35.600 --> 0:03:38.520 it had become the norm to go to the White 0:03:38.520 --> 0:03:41.520 House for meetings, for events, for parties. It had become 0:03:41.560 --> 0:03:44.800 the norm to be named, to be seen and not 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:50.440 be ignored or thrown away by our administration. And so 0:03:50.560 --> 0:03:53.680 when Trump came in, it wasn't just like cold water. 0:03:53.800 --> 0:03:56.800 It was like jumping into a pool of acid. You 0:03:56.880 --> 0:04:00.480 went from the White House being turned rainbow to signify 0:04:00.480 --> 0:04:03.920 the passing of marriage equality in twenty fifteen to it 0:04:04.120 --> 0:04:09.120 literally having lights out, lights out on our democracy, lights 0:04:09.160 --> 0:04:13.000 out on anything that was not white, cis straight and 0:04:13.120 --> 0:04:17.720 quote unquote Christian. So to be in the presence of 0:04:18.520 --> 0:04:22.520 the President, the first Lady, the Vice President was an 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:28.039 amazing experience and it reminded me of how hard fought 0:04:28.320 --> 0:04:30.960 the rights that we have gotten to this point have been, 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:34.600 but that we can no longer take things for granted, 0:04:35.480 --> 0:04:39.479 because what was one today can be taken away tomorrow. 0:04:40.680 --> 0:04:43.919 And so for us to have real progress, right, for 0:04:44.000 --> 0:04:46.680 us to understand real progress, we have to put in 0:04:46.760 --> 0:04:51.960 the consistent, real work. I posted my pictures on Instagram, 0:04:52.160 --> 0:04:54.560 So if you want to see some of the pictures 0:04:54.560 --> 0:04:57.600 from the celebration at the White House, by all means, 0:04:57.640 --> 0:05:00.320 go and check out my Instagram at D two sense 0:05:00.520 --> 0:05:03.960 d E t w oc e nts, the same as 0:05:04.000 --> 0:05:07.039 my Twitter, and you can see some of the pictures 0:05:07.080 --> 0:05:10.760 and the beautiful spread of food. And somebody had remarked 0:05:10.760 --> 0:05:13.480 and it was hilarious because I'd forgotten. They go, oh 0:05:13.520 --> 0:05:16.120 my god, you mean you got actual food at the 0:05:16.160 --> 0:05:19.600 White House and not a pile of fast food for McDonald's. 0:05:20.200 --> 0:05:24.040 If you remember what the President did welcoming basketball teams 0:05:24.080 --> 0:05:27.160 into the White House for their historic win and then 0:05:27.640 --> 0:05:31.599 them being met with cold, hard, dried out fast food. 0:05:32.480 --> 0:05:35.200 That's not how you honor people, and that is definitely 0:05:35.279 --> 0:05:38.640 not how we were greeted at the White House this week. 0:05:39.320 --> 0:05:43.520 The queer community the White House had rainbows going all 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:46.839 over the place and streamers down and the band was 0:05:46.960 --> 0:05:51.480 playing and there were rainbow roses in the banquet room, 0:05:51.560 --> 0:05:55.960 and it was just a beautiful, beautiful time and for 0:05:56.720 --> 0:06:00.120 a few hours we all got to cheer as each 0:06:00.120 --> 0:06:05.039 other and hug and congratulate one another on a wonderful 0:06:05.080 --> 0:06:11.120 Pride month. But it was also clouded, right, because what 0:06:11.200 --> 0:06:14.520 has happened over the past couple of weeks. We have 0:06:14.680 --> 0:06:19.400 seen a white supremacist terrorist group be disrupted as they 0:06:19.400 --> 0:06:22.880 were headed to a Pride event to go and cause 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:29.000 I'm certain harm right, who gets pulled over with riot 0:06:29.040 --> 0:06:32.200 gear and shields and smoke bombs and all of these 0:06:32.240 --> 0:06:36.320 things if you're not setting up to ensue some type 0:06:36.320 --> 0:06:42.640 of violence. You had the Proud Boys break into a 0:06:42.760 --> 0:06:47.159 drag story time in California and start hurling transphobic and 0:06:47.200 --> 0:06:51.400 homophobic insults. You have Marjorie Taylor Green's dumbass saying that 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:54.920 she's going to write legislation to make it a legal 0:06:54.960 --> 0:06:57.880 to have drag queens around children. You know what should 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:03.960 be fucking illegal, having racist, white supremaci homophobic pieces of 0:07:04.000 --> 0:07:07.320 shit around children. You know what should be illegal carrying 0:07:07.320 --> 0:07:11.160 in AR fifteen in this country because that causes more 0:07:11.200 --> 0:07:14.160 harm than a fucking drag queen reading a story. But 0:07:14.240 --> 0:07:16.760 those are the things that the Republican Party wants to 0:07:16.760 --> 0:07:20.600 concentrate on. You see, they want to create this culture 0:07:20.680 --> 0:07:23.840 war as if the real enemies of this state are 0:07:23.920 --> 0:07:27.920 not the ones that are occupying the title Republican, as 0:07:27.960 --> 0:07:30.480 if the real enemies are not the people who have 0:07:30.560 --> 0:07:34.000 access to their own personal arsenals, and then decide that 0:07:34.080 --> 0:07:37.559 they are going to seek revenge on communities they feel 0:07:37.560 --> 0:07:41.280 like are trying to quote unquote replace them. What should 0:07:41.320 --> 0:07:43.880 be illegal is for a member of Congress to attend 0:07:43.880 --> 0:07:46.800 a white Supremacis rally and still have a fucking job. 0:07:47.200 --> 0:07:51.280 That's what should be illegal. But we don't have those conversations. Instead, 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:54.680 we allow the right to propagate their bullshit and then 0:07:54.840 --> 0:07:58.880 us sit and couch ourselves in defense. We need to 0:07:58.960 --> 0:08:01.960 be more proactive if we need to call out who 0:08:02.000 --> 0:08:04.800 these people are and what they stand for. We need 0:08:04.840 --> 0:08:10.400 to stop allowing them to make criminals of the LGBTQ community, 0:08:10.400 --> 0:08:13.200 of the black community, of the Latin X community, of 0:08:13.280 --> 0:08:19.640 Indigenous people, of Muslim people. Right, you don't get to 0:08:19.880 --> 0:08:24.040 rewrite what you believe America should look like because other 0:08:24.080 --> 0:08:29.200 people's truth make your bullshit uncomfortable. Because that's what it 0:08:29.240 --> 0:08:34.600 comes down to. Folks fear right, fear, and the desire 0:08:34.679 --> 0:08:37.920 to control. Because, let me tell you something that is 0:08:37.960 --> 0:08:42.760 such an affront to white supremacy and patriarchy. Are people 0:08:44.080 --> 0:08:48.520 defining themselves for themselves. And that's why they see such 0:08:48.520 --> 0:08:51.760 a problem with the LGBTQ community. Why can't you just 0:08:51.960 --> 0:08:54.920 go along with the get along? Why can't you fall 0:08:55.040 --> 0:08:58.000 for the prescriptions that society has put out to you 0:08:58.080 --> 0:09:02.800 based on some story in the Bible. And it's because 0:09:02.880 --> 0:09:06.360 guess what, God made us all and he made us 0:09:06.400 --> 0:09:11.120 all different, and you don't get to tell me how 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:13.800 I should define myself. You don't get to box me. 0:09:15.480 --> 0:09:19.280 And so when we celebrate pride, this is what it 0:09:19.360 --> 0:09:21.720 is about. It is about holding our heads up high, 0:09:21.800 --> 0:09:25.440 straightening our backs, putting our shoulders back, and saying you 0:09:25.480 --> 0:09:29.600 will fucking see me, and I am no longer ashamed. 0:09:30.760 --> 0:09:34.400 That is the beauty of pride. And it felt so 0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:41.000 wonderful and always humbling to be invited to attend these 0:09:41.040 --> 0:09:45.560 events at the People's House and be reminded of our 0:09:45.600 --> 0:09:49.920 power and our purpose and our pathway towards bending the 0:09:50.120 --> 0:09:55.200 ark a little bit more towards justice. Coming up next, 0:09:55.600 --> 0:10:00.640 my conversation with a woman who came out as transgender 0:10:00.640 --> 0:10:04.480 to her employees in an email. When Noland and what 0:10:04.679 --> 0:10:08.040 the effects of that have been and what made her 0:10:08.200 --> 0:10:11.560 decide that a couple of years ago it was the 0:10:11.679 --> 0:10:16.120 time to live in her truth. Hey there, I want 0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:18.480 to tell you about another podcast I think you'll love. 0:10:18.559 --> 0:10:21.760 The Brown Girl's Guide to Politics, hosted by a Shanty Goehler, 0:10:21.880 --> 0:10:25.360 the president of Emerge BGG, is the one stop shop 0:10:25.360 --> 0:10:27.280 for women of color who want to hear and talk 0:10:27.320 --> 0:10:30.200 about the world of politics. Join a Shanty this season 0:10:30.200 --> 0:10:32.520 as she talks to incredible women of color who are 0:10:32.600 --> 0:10:34.840 changing the face of politics and tackling some of the 0:10:34.880 --> 0:10:38.720 most important issues basing the United States, from reproductive justice 0:10:38.760 --> 0:10:41.440 to voting rights, to climate change and more. Tune in 0:10:41.480 --> 0:10:46.760 every Tuesday wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm David 0:10:46.760 --> 0:10:51.840 Plots of Slaves Political Gabfest. As another election season accelerates, 0:10:52.000 --> 0:10:54.440 it can be tricky to sort through all the noise 0:10:54.480 --> 0:10:57.600 and the news. Each week on the Gabfest, John Dickerson, 0:10:57.640 --> 0:11:00.880 Emily Bathlon and I decipher the headlines, break down the races, 0:11:00.920 --> 0:11:04.360 and tell you what issues really matter. We do not 0:11:04.559 --> 0:11:07.839 always agree. We definitely do not always agree, but we 0:11:08.160 --> 0:11:11.040 always deliver thoughtful debate and we always have a good time. 0:11:11.520 --> 0:11:17.640 So subscribe to Slates Political Gapfest new episodes every Thursday, folks. 0:11:17.679 --> 0:11:21.000 I am very happy to welcome to Woka affadaily for 0:11:21.400 --> 0:11:26.520 the first time. Win Noland, who is the CEO of 0:11:26.600 --> 0:11:30.560 Bradley and Parker and at the age of fifty six, 0:11:31.000 --> 0:11:36.679 came out in an email to her employees as trans. 0:11:37.760 --> 0:11:43.520 When I want to start with what your mental, emotional, 0:11:44.120 --> 0:11:51.160 physical preparation was to make the decision to come out 0:11:51.160 --> 0:11:54.760 at fifty six. When we think about and to have 0:11:54.800 --> 0:11:58.720 conversations about people coming out, whether you're coming out as gay, 0:11:58.840 --> 0:12:03.560 as trans, as bisexual, or so on, we often think 0:12:03.600 --> 0:12:07.520 about young, younger people, right, and so what was the 0:12:07.960 --> 0:12:11.320 walk us through, what the experience was for you to 0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:16.160 be in your fifties and make this incredibly important and 0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:21.120 impactful decision. So, first of all, thanks so much for 0:12:21.160 --> 0:12:23.600 having me. It's it's a real pleasure to be with 0:12:23.640 --> 0:12:27.640 you in your audience today. Um. You know, I think 0:12:27.920 --> 0:12:33.800 that a large part of my late transition had to 0:12:33.840 --> 0:12:40.199 do with with the time period that I was born 0:12:40.240 --> 0:12:45.040 in and that I was raised in. There was really 0:12:45.320 --> 0:12:52.079 very little information out there when I was growing up 0:12:52.280 --> 0:12:57.520 about what being trans was. You know, there was a time, 0:12:58.200 --> 0:13:00.280 and I'm old enough to know this, there was a 0:13:00.360 --> 0:13:03.240 time when we had no Google, we had no Internet. 0:13:04.400 --> 0:13:07.199 You know, you had the World Book Encyclopedia and your 0:13:07.240 --> 0:13:12.800 public library, and neither of those two places were repositories 0:13:13.280 --> 0:13:19.640 for information regarding trans people. So I think a lot 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:26.040 of people in my generation knew that they didn't fit in, 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:29.800 knew that there was not and I say this, I'm 0:13:29.840 --> 0:13:32.360 saying this so so I hope that people don't get 0:13:32.400 --> 0:13:36.040 mad at me. Knew that something wasn't quite right, and 0:13:36.400 --> 0:13:38.320 I don't mean that. And you know, we have the 0:13:39.280 --> 0:13:40.720 we all have the right to be where we are. 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:42.679 But you know, you just knew you didn't fit in. 0:13:42.760 --> 0:13:46.240 Something wasn't quite the same as everyone else. But it 0:13:46.320 --> 0:13:49.960 wasn't that easy to label, you know. So a lot 0:13:50.000 --> 0:13:54.280 of a lot of people from my generation who were 0:13:54.360 --> 0:13:58.360 trans kind of initially thought that they were. It wasn't 0:13:58.400 --> 0:14:00.760 so much that they were trans, but maybe that they 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:05.800 were gay, because there was more information about that. Although 0:14:05.880 --> 0:14:08.840 certainly not as prevalent as it is today, it was 0:14:09.160 --> 0:14:13.440 still light years ahead about where information about trans people was. 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:19.440 So I think for my own personal story, I think 0:14:19.480 --> 0:14:22.600 that was the case for me that I really didn't 0:14:22.640 --> 0:14:26.280 I knew something was different about me, but it was 0:14:26.360 --> 0:14:29.040 hard for me to quantify it for a long time. 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:33.920 And then when I was able to quantify it, it 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:36.320 just didn't seem that there was really anything much to 0:14:36.360 --> 0:14:40.640 do about it because I certainly didn't know anyone who transitioned. 0:14:41.640 --> 0:14:45.240 You know, there wasn't anything in really popular culture or 0:14:45.320 --> 0:14:53.720 media about it. So it really wasn't until the Internet. 0:14:53.760 --> 0:14:57.920 The Internet started to really take hold, and all of 0:14:57.920 --> 0:15:01.120 a sudden there was just it was like opening a 0:15:01.200 --> 0:15:05.960 Pandora's box of information that became available to people, and 0:15:06.360 --> 0:15:09.760 you found out about other people experiencing these same kinds 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:12.760 of things, and that, in fact, there were options to 0:15:12.800 --> 0:15:15.920 do something about it, which is, you know, ultimately what 0:15:15.960 --> 0:15:18.840 I did. So that was kind of the timeline as 0:15:18.840 --> 0:15:22.720 to why I came out so late, And there's the 0:15:22.760 --> 0:15:24.920 reasons that a lot of us who come out have. 0:15:26.120 --> 0:15:29.000 You know, you worry about acceptance at work, you worry 0:15:29.040 --> 0:15:32.720 about acceptance in your family, you worry about acceptance in 0:15:32.880 --> 0:15:38.359 romantic relationships. You know, there's a whole plethora of anxiety 0:15:38.400 --> 0:15:42.520 and angst that goes along with it. So it just 0:15:42.560 --> 0:15:45.840 took me a while to work that all out. How 0:15:45.880 --> 0:15:51.960 did you go through your process? Meaning did you build that? So? 0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:56.440 For me when I came out as as queer, it 0:15:56.600 --> 0:16:01.080 was I was quite young, had finished college, and I 0:16:01.120 --> 0:16:04.080 wanted to make sure for me that I had had 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:07.400 the support of my friends, my sister like that, I 0:16:07.440 --> 0:16:12.320 had built up my own kind of fortified community before 0:16:12.760 --> 0:16:17.160 I came out to my parents, right because I wanted 0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:20.120 to feel like I had people on my side. And 0:16:20.160 --> 0:16:23.760 so for you, how how did you go through that 0:16:23.840 --> 0:16:30.240 process before you would then tell employees, Yeah, totally totally 0:16:30.280 --> 0:16:33.000 get what you're saying there. And I did something quite 0:16:33.040 --> 0:16:38.280 similar with me. I'm an only child and don't have 0:16:38.320 --> 0:16:42.360 a you know, kind of a large nuclear family. But 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:47.920 I confided in some close friends and some closed business 0:16:48.000 --> 0:16:52.880 associates who knew for you know, they knew a good 0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:58.520 deal earlier than the rest of the people I told. 0:16:58.640 --> 0:17:03.120 And and for those exact same reasons that you discussed. 0:17:03.160 --> 0:17:05.520 You know, you need someone to kind of be a 0:17:05.600 --> 0:17:09.800 safe harbor. You need someone to kind of bounce things 0:17:09.880 --> 0:17:13.520 off of, you know, once you get them, once you 0:17:13.560 --> 0:17:15.480 get them kind of on your side, to use you 0:17:15.760 --> 0:17:19.320 to use your phase. You can then bounce things off them. Well, 0:17:19.359 --> 0:17:20.840 you know, what do you think if I do it 0:17:20.880 --> 0:17:22.919 this way? Or how do you think this is going 0:17:22.960 --> 0:17:26.040 to be perceived? And it just listen to anything we 0:17:26.080 --> 0:17:28.800 do in life, whether it's what we're talking about or 0:17:28.840 --> 0:17:35.880 any other pursuit. Having valuable friends and allies is you know, 0:17:36.200 --> 0:17:40.359 it is just always a game changer. So when do 0:17:40.480 --> 0:17:44.200 you make the decision? Now? How long was it until 0:17:44.359 --> 0:17:49.200 you drafted the email to your employees? Had you told 0:17:49.320 --> 0:17:52.200 other people? Had you told the board? Had you told 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:54.680 you know, other people that were kind of stakeholders and 0:17:54.840 --> 0:17:58.800 at your executive C suite level? Before then you would 0:17:58.840 --> 0:18:03.200 tell everyone else. So I kind of made the decision 0:18:03.359 --> 0:18:08.080 to do this in I think it. I'm hoping I'm 0:18:08.080 --> 0:18:10.160 getting my own year, right. I think it was January 0:18:10.200 --> 0:18:16.119 of twenty and seventeen, and the email announcement you're talking 0:18:16.160 --> 0:18:20.119 about was sent out in May of that same year, 0:18:20.160 --> 0:18:23.800 after the long Memorial Day weekend. It was the Tuesday 0:18:23.840 --> 0:18:31.280 that we came back. Particularly because of my position and 0:18:31.520 --> 0:18:34.480 legal responsibilities and things of that nature that I have, 0:18:34.760 --> 0:18:38.240 I wanted to make sure that I did everything as 0:18:38.400 --> 0:18:42.880 correctly as I could from a legal standpoint. So earlier 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:46.560 in that year. Once I had made the decision, I 0:18:46.720 --> 0:18:50.680 retained an attorney who was an expert does a lot 0:18:50.680 --> 0:18:55.720 of pro bono work. Actually, he's an expert in trans 0:18:55.880 --> 0:19:00.159 issues and getting all your documents right, getting your end 0:19:00.200 --> 0:19:03.560 of markers changed, getting your birth certificate changed. You know, 0:19:03.720 --> 0:19:06.800 here in New York. Here in New York, we're lucky 0:19:07.880 --> 0:19:10.159 because we're able to do all those things. You know, 0:19:10.200 --> 0:19:14.200 in other states people find it much more challenging. Here 0:19:14.200 --> 0:19:17.040 in New York. It's effort, and it should be effort. 0:19:17.040 --> 0:19:18.359 I mean, you know, you should be able to do 0:19:18.400 --> 0:19:20.920 these things, you know, with a wave of a hand. 0:19:21.000 --> 0:19:28.159 But it's it's the effort is is extremely justified and 0:19:28.320 --> 0:19:31.800 not over It's not a burden. So I was able 0:19:31.880 --> 0:19:36.320 to get all those things done prior to making the 0:19:36.359 --> 0:19:41.359 announcement that I did in after that Memorial Day. So 0:19:41.400 --> 0:19:43.040 it was about it, I guess, like a four or 0:19:43.080 --> 0:19:48.040 five month process of kind of getting ready and getting 0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:50.600 kind of all because you know, as you might expect, 0:19:50.680 --> 0:19:54.280 I'm a pretty organized person. I'm goal oriented. Uh So 0:19:54.440 --> 0:19:56.120 you know I had kind of a I had kind 0:19:56.119 --> 0:19:58.439 of my own pathway this is what I need to 0:19:58.440 --> 0:20:00.040 get done by then, this is what I need to 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:03.480 get done by this date. Um So I was able 0:20:03.520 --> 0:20:09.639 to accomplish all those things. And during that time, excuse me, 0:20:09.760 --> 0:20:14.520 I did have a couple of conversations, several conversations with 0:20:14.600 --> 0:20:18.800 exactly those types of people you're talking about, um, fellow 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:24.520 board members, the executives, excuse me, people that I'm just 0:20:24.640 --> 0:20:28.400 friendly with here, um that I wanted to give them 0:20:28.400 --> 0:20:29.840 a little bit more of a heads up because I 0:20:29.840 --> 0:20:33.960 thought they deserved it. So what was the response when? 0:20:34.520 --> 0:20:37.480 What was what was the overall response, and what is 0:20:37.520 --> 0:20:43.360 the response been, Because now it's been roughly five years, right, yeah, 0:20:43.440 --> 0:20:47.000 four yeah, so it's been it's yeah to tell us, 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:51.199 I'm so sorry. I'm feeling a coughing episode coming on. 0:20:51.600 --> 0:20:59.119 Bad timing. UM So, I think the most, um, the 0:20:59.200 --> 0:21:04.119 most appropriate way to discuss with you how everyone's reaction 0:21:04.359 --> 0:21:13.600 was is to say there was an initial element of surprise, 0:21:15.560 --> 0:21:19.600 which I personally believe and I know some trance people 0:21:19.680 --> 0:21:23.840 don't agree with me on this, I personally believe that 0:21:23.840 --> 0:21:28.320 that is to be expected, and that's okay. You know, 0:21:28.359 --> 0:21:33.160 in my case, I had years and years and years 0:21:33.160 --> 0:21:35.680 of figuring out what the heck was going on with 0:21:35.720 --> 0:21:40.120 me and making this decision. In the case of these 0:21:40.160 --> 0:21:44.920 other people, I was presenting, I mean, so much differently 0:21:44.960 --> 0:21:47.480 than I am today on this goal with you. This 0:21:47.560 --> 0:21:49.760 is how they knew me for ten or fifteen years. 0:21:50.160 --> 0:21:53.320 I'd be surprised if they weren't surprised. So, you know, 0:21:53.359 --> 0:21:57.560 I think you have to give people that initial you know, 0:21:58.720 --> 0:22:02.040 that initial breath for them to take it all in 0:22:02.160 --> 0:22:08.760 and process it. So there was definitely that, but that 0:22:08.880 --> 0:22:17.880 was very quickly replaced almost universally, with a really tremendous 0:22:17.960 --> 0:22:21.840 level of support. So I have really and truly been 0:22:22.359 --> 0:22:29.600 very blessed in how my transition you know, progressed, and 0:22:29.640 --> 0:22:34.120 how my transition was seen by others. And and I 0:22:34.240 --> 0:22:37.960 know that I am blessed and fortunate because I know 0:22:38.800 --> 0:22:42.359 that a lot of other people have a much more 0:22:42.560 --> 0:22:48.400 difficult time, much more Yeah. And one of the reasons why, 0:22:48.760 --> 0:22:51.920 one of the reasons why, you know, a few years 0:22:51.920 --> 0:22:56.240 ago I agreed to to be more public about this, 0:22:56.320 --> 0:22:58.760 and you know, had some really top tier media attention 0:22:58.760 --> 0:23:02.120 in the Wall Street Journal and Fox News, etc. One 0:23:02.160 --> 0:23:04.919 of the reasons I did that was because I wanted 0:23:04.960 --> 0:23:07.960 to show people that there are success stories here, that 0:23:08.119 --> 0:23:13.720 not everything is a horror show, But that doesn't change 0:23:13.760 --> 0:23:17.439 the fact that some people go through those really, really 0:23:17.520 --> 0:23:23.760 tough time. What do you make when now, you know, 0:23:23.880 --> 0:23:27.639 a couple of years are removed from you coming out, 0:23:28.200 --> 0:23:32.880 and the attacks that you're seeing around the country, particularly 0:23:32.960 --> 0:23:36.840 on trans youth, directed at trans youth, or the parents 0:23:38.080 --> 0:23:42.280 of trans children, particularly in Texas for instance, where they're 0:23:42.320 --> 0:23:46.920 being criminalized for providing the care that their children need 0:23:47.000 --> 0:23:50.520 in order to live full and complete lives. So how 0:23:50.560 --> 0:23:56.600 has that been landing on you? So, you know, I 0:23:56.680 --> 0:24:00.679 mentioned before we were talking about the steps in my transition, 0:24:00.840 --> 0:24:04.439 how living in New York things were considerably easier than 0:24:04.480 --> 0:24:06.840 they would be if I lived, for instance, in Texas, 0:24:07.160 --> 0:24:12.200 right And this is really to me, this is such 0:24:12.640 --> 0:24:16.959 such an unfortunate reflection of a lot that's going on 0:24:17.040 --> 0:24:20.240 in our country right now, where we have just become 0:24:21.320 --> 0:24:27.600 ultra polarized and and everything is now seen in this scene, 0:24:27.640 --> 0:24:33.560 in this red and blue split um and it's just 0:24:33.680 --> 0:24:38.160 I find it. I find it so disturbing that you know, 0:24:38.240 --> 0:24:43.760 we made, we made a lot of strides as a 0:24:43.920 --> 0:24:53.240 country in embracing diversity and being inclusive, and now we're seeing, 0:24:53.320 --> 0:24:55.440 you know, on the part of a lot of these 0:24:55.560 --> 0:24:58.199 kinds of states like Texas of course is in the 0:24:58.240 --> 0:25:01.440 farmat but you know, tennis See has some nasty laws 0:25:01.480 --> 0:25:05.119 on the books, and there's some stuff going on in Florida. 0:25:05.280 --> 0:25:08.760 And you know, I don't know the statistics, but you 0:25:08.760 --> 0:25:11.199 know it's more than three or four states. This is 0:25:11.240 --> 0:25:16.280 going on a lot of states. It's just so troubling 0:25:16.359 --> 0:25:22.080 because these people, we just want to live our lives. 0:25:22.160 --> 0:25:30.320 We're not trying to inflict my lifestyle and my gender identification. 0:25:30.440 --> 0:25:33.040 I'm not trying to inflict that on anybody else. This 0:25:33.160 --> 0:25:35.880 is what's right for me, And you know, I just 0:25:35.960 --> 0:25:39.880 want to live my life the way that I think 0:25:39.960 --> 0:25:42.520 you should be able to live yours, and everybody should 0:25:42.520 --> 0:25:45.480 be able to live theres and the fact that this 0:25:45.560 --> 0:25:48.399 seems to be I think the thing that bothers me 0:25:48.480 --> 0:25:52.840 the most is that it's like being demonized. That you know, 0:25:53.000 --> 0:25:56.919 being trans or different in some respect is being demonized. 0:25:57.280 --> 0:26:01.440 And in reality, you know, the great thing about this 0:26:01.480 --> 0:26:04.560 country to me has always been that it's a melting 0:26:04.600 --> 0:26:10.160 pot of so many different nationalities and cultures and sexual 0:26:10.280 --> 0:26:14.400 identities and everything else. And that's where we get our 0:26:14.440 --> 0:26:18.199 strength from that diversity. And I just I find it 0:26:18.440 --> 0:26:22.840 very very, very troubling. You know, we're both in New York, 0:26:23.000 --> 0:26:26.560 and so to some extent there's like a sheltering right 0:26:26.640 --> 0:26:31.640 that happens. We absolutely, but I think that my concern 0:26:31.680 --> 0:26:34.720 and the concern that I raise on woke f you know, 0:26:34.800 --> 0:26:36.960 have been raising the alarm on for the past couple 0:26:36.960 --> 0:26:40.000 of years, is that I don't believe that we will 0:26:40.040 --> 0:26:42.679 all be safe for long just because we happen to 0:26:42.720 --> 0:26:47.000 be in blue states, particularly if we have those that 0:26:47.040 --> 0:26:51.720 are forcing these anti LGBTQ policies make it to the 0:26:51.760 --> 0:26:56.120 federal level. So you know, that's the depth of fear, right, 0:26:56.200 --> 0:26:59.439 that's definitely the fear. I don't know about you, but 0:26:59.480 --> 0:27:03.520 I guess it's I guess it's two years ago. It is. 0:27:03.560 --> 0:27:06.680 It's two years ago now. I'm sure you were like me, 0:27:07.119 --> 0:27:09.600 and when that big Title nine case was in the 0:27:09.640 --> 0:27:12.600 Supreme Court, I was fully prepared for that to go 0:27:12.720 --> 0:27:18.840 the other way and was really pleasantly surprised, and you know, 0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:22.080 in a way affirmed a little bit that says, Okay, well, 0:27:22.119 --> 0:27:24.640 maybe these people aren't all as crazy as we think 0:27:24.680 --> 0:27:28.880 they are, because you know, they upheld that, and I 0:27:28.920 --> 0:27:31.600 think a lot of us in our community thought that 0:27:31.760 --> 0:27:36.320 was going the wrong way. Yeah, so you know, one 0:27:36.400 --> 0:27:40.159 of the one of the things. So I absolutely agree 0:27:40.200 --> 0:27:42.639 with what you're saying, because if these things reach the 0:27:42.640 --> 0:27:45.680