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Speaker 1: Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say

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Speaker 1: decisions decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty.

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Speaker 1: You definitely say to welcome, Welcome to the new podcast.

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Speaker 1: Oh you want to say together, decisions decisions. Okay, you

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Speaker 1: do a good job, dad. We ready, Oh do a

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Speaker 1: good job daddy.

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Speaker 2: Y'all heard all that I wanted to like come in

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Speaker 2: like ooo, but that's a ghost. Apparently I dress like

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Speaker 2: a bit. You don't even talk Welcome, y'all to apparently think.

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Speaker 1: About to show up and do ship like you know,

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Speaker 1: like I was fucking pea and I would have gave

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Speaker 1: tinkabella whole accent.

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Speaker 2: That ain't even a thing. But anyways, y'all, Welcome to

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Speaker 2: Decisions Decisions. Happy motherfucking Halloween. Make sure you test your

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Speaker 2: candy for drugs, because that's what apparently they're doing now

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Speaker 2: in twenty twenty five, Welcome to a new episode.

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Speaker 1: I'm tinker Bell and I'm Gabrielle Union. That is not

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Speaker 1: her name on the show the movie. Her name is

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Speaker 1: uh gabriel If you guys are listening, I'm wearing a

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Speaker 1: clover fit and also just want to tell you my

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Speaker 1: homegirl and I were looking for the fitsarea was on together.

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Speaker 1: She's like, you want to get the white girl once?

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Speaker 1: Since you like, no, I don't that is Oh she

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Speaker 1: tried it. Well, y'all are in for a special treat.

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Speaker 1: We have tricks and treats here on today's pod. Yes

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Speaker 1: we have. Y'all know her as Cash. Y'all know her

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Speaker 1: as a Nitcherrell.

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Speaker 2: Y'all know her as that girl that gives you all

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Speaker 2: of the sex tips, the looks, the tricks. We have

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Speaker 2: cashall on the goddamn podcast your Sexologists, Best fee Curious

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Speaker 2: Lives one orgasm at a time.

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Speaker 1: And if you're not familiar, they've actually heard you on

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Speaker 1: our page. Oh yes, well yeah, well you got to

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Speaker 1: know me pretty well over there. Yes there, it's a

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Speaker 1: decisions decision, so it's a little bit more chill. It's

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Speaker 1: true for.

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Speaker 2: The first seven or eight minutes, and then we're we're

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Speaker 2: also joined by Chrystalapa.

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Speaker 1: Because that's how you said it, Chrystal, it was very biggie.

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Speaker 1: I feel like that's how big he said. And why I'm.

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Speaker 2: Excited is because in talking about non traditional relationships, you

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Speaker 2: two are ethically non monogamous, and I'm really excited to

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Speaker 2: kind of just lean into what that dynamic of your

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Speaker 2: relationship looks like. And then we're gonna get into all

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Speaker 2: the tricks and treats throughout this episode.

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Speaker 1: Yes, where are you holding a vibrator? Oh?

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Speaker 3: It's my tool of choice, nigga.

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Speaker 1: What tool you need today? Am?

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Speaker 4: It's like an intimidation tactic like that he does, like

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Speaker 4: to keep me in check. It's like a threat, like

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Speaker 4: he starts doing things with it or whatever like, And

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Speaker 4: the fact that he's across from me now is gonna

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Speaker 4: make it like even easier for him to like try

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Speaker 4: to you know, but today I've dressed this Madam Scorpion

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Speaker 4: aka get over here, right, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: So oh, I'm trying to I'm trying to magnetize who

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Speaker 1: does this one? Who does this one? More back thought?

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Speaker 2: It was thank you you were over there shaking your

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Speaker 2: head being really judgy.

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Speaker 1: Mortar Combat.

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Speaker 2: While I don't like video games like that, Mortar Combat

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Speaker 2: was my ship that and Frogger judge me now across that.

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Speaker 1: I you so love making that little bit across the street.

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Speaker 1: Did you have to hop on the little logs over

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Speaker 1: the water and water? I forgot about Frogger. I love girl,

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Speaker 1: I'll meet you. I love Mario. I'm a game. I'm

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Speaker 1: a game girl like the shoot stop trying to sell

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Speaker 1: your fucking Patreon and girl, oh talk about that. I'd

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Speaker 1: be like this whole scamming this high.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, she's playing grandto I was like fly of helicopter, Honey. Okay,

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Speaker 3: can you.

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Speaker 1: Guys share what the dynamic of your relationship is, how

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Speaker 1: y'all got together, and then also just what your boundaries

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Speaker 1: are and how.

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Speaker 4: You choose to play with each other. So okay, okay

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Speaker 4: go first and daddy go ahead. I I would answer

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Speaker 4: that reverse order. I think we're still defined in our boundaries. Okay,

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Speaker 4: we've been together, well now it's almost three years, come

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Speaker 4: next to Eberar, but like we're still figuring out. I

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Speaker 4: think what we thought we'd be comfortable with as time

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Speaker 4: is progressive changed, and then the more things that we

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Speaker 4: step into, the more things that we do, we're like, oh,

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Speaker 4: I thought that would bother me, and I's I'm not

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Speaker 4: that bothered, or okay, know what, that's a little too

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Speaker 4: intimate for me or whatever. So there are things that

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Speaker 4: I thought wouldn't bother me that also came up. So

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Speaker 4: I think in our ethical nominogamy, it's more so just

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Speaker 4: a matter of being on the same page and if

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Speaker 4: you're not sure, checking in, how are we feeling about this?

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Speaker 1: Do we want to try this? Do we not? I

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Speaker 1: would say that our policy is to protect the protect.

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Speaker 4: Home first, okay, right, So we just go about it

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Speaker 4: and ask ourselves, is this something that has the ability

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Speaker 4: to like damage home?

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Speaker 1: Right?

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Speaker 4: And if it has the ability to damage home, then

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Speaker 4: we rather do it out. But if it has the

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Speaker 4: opportunity to make the home more fruitful and plentiful, then

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Speaker 4: we might saptap.

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Speaker 2: What happens if you feel like it could make it

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Speaker 2: better and he feels like it could damage the home,

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Speaker 2: like and what things could essentially damage a home in

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Speaker 2: an ethically non monogamous relationship.

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Speaker 3: Well, the way we handle it is we have these

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Speaker 3: discussions and basically it's like a lawyer presenting the case.

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Speaker 3: If you can present your case and your case makes sense,

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Speaker 3: then you proceed. If you can't prove your case, for example,

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Speaker 3: she can have a sup. She made her case.

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Speaker 1: Babe.

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Speaker 3: I want someone that can do launder. I want someone

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Speaker 3: that can, you know, take care of the kids. I

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Speaker 3: want someone that can rub my feet and I was like.

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Speaker 1: Making the kids too. Oh yeah, not a babysitter, not

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Speaker 1: a cleaner, you said, I want to sub to do

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Speaker 1: the thing.

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Speaker 4: Well, you know what it is like most of the

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Speaker 4: time for me, it's going to be I've had men

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Speaker 4: and women, but I wouldn't. I've only trusted women with

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Speaker 4: my child, my children, Okay, and then they're not introduced

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Speaker 4: to them. It's like, hey, here's mommy's little little girl's

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Speaker 4: little princess.

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Speaker 1: Whatever. No, they're just like a friend to me. You

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 4: There, there's a period of time in which that person

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Speaker 4: will be under consideration, like usually three to six months

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Speaker 4: of where I'm really assessing who they are as a person.

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Speaker 4: And once I feel like, Okay, this person's good. You

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Speaker 4: know they're in real life. These people have regular lives,

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Speaker 4: they have little trust.

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Speaker 1: You just throught a whole new way too. That's mommy's friend.

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Speaker 4: Because because think about it, how many of us have

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Speaker 4: had friends that we've introduced to our kids, but also

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Speaker 4: our friends that we do things with. Right, So you

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Speaker 4: have to protect the child's innocence, right. So if I

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Speaker 4: met this woman who by day, for example, I had

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Speaker 4: a sub. She was the director at a special needs facility.

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Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. She had a social work

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Speaker 4: background and a master's degree in child psychology. Why is

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Speaker 4: she not a potential person who could be safe for

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Speaker 4: my child when she is literally qualified in so many

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Speaker 4: ways to take care of individuals I have an autistic

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Speaker 4: child or have a child with ADHD, and she literally

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Speaker 4: had qualifications. Like let's just say if I was screening

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Speaker 4: her as a nanny, I'd.

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Speaker 1: Be like, Okay, you know, you'd be great. You'd be great.

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Speaker 2: You judge that first before you judge how sexually attracted

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Speaker 2: you are to them?

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Speaker 1: Like I think what comes first?

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Speaker 4: I think yes, because I'm a demisexual, and if I

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Speaker 4: don't establish a certain type of you could be a

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Speaker 4: bad You could be bad as hell. But if I

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Speaker 4: don't feel like you're like we connect in a way

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Speaker 4: that makes me feel like drawn to you or anything

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Speaker 4: like that, then it's not gonna go that far anyway, right,

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Speaker 4: So I think in that situation, you and me connecting

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Speaker 4: can change my eyes, like my eye when I look

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Speaker 4: at you, it can change. So I have not had

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Speaker 4: every person in my life around my because it's only

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Speaker 4: literally been about two people who've made it that far.

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Speaker 4: To be exposed to my children and my family, because

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Speaker 4: my family know me right and everything that I'm into.

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Speaker 4: So I would say, you have to take into account

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Speaker 4: who that person is outside of that lifestyle and then

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Speaker 4: see if you guys also align within the lifestyle. So

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Speaker 4: she loved cleaning the house, she loved fosing clothes off,

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Speaker 4: and she had a little bit of a little in

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Speaker 4: her so she would She's the one who's gonna watch

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Speaker 4: the Disney movies with them, and she's gonna enjoy Mulan

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Speaker 4: just like they're majoining Milan.

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Speaker 1: She likes color and books in I'm trying to my

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Speaker 1: face and I'll tell you why. I know, because I

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Speaker 1: realize sometimes when I look like I'm in shock, I

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Speaker 1: look like I'm judging, and clearly this is no, no,

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Speaker 1: not at all us. Yeah, this is probably the first

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Speaker 1: time I've ever heard of a sub not directly serving

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Speaker 1: the person. And obviously, like you know, watching children and

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Speaker 1: engaging with your children is that. But I'm just like, damn,

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Speaker 1: I never thought of it that way or also even

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Speaker 1: like in a family dynamic. Yeah, now how do you then?

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Speaker 1: Because Okay, when a sub does something, they want their reward,

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Speaker 1: and that's when we get sexual, how do you what

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Speaker 1: are her rewards?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 3: Then?

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Speaker 1: Okay, so you let hold on? You let not Christopher Wallace.

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Speaker 1: You you giggling about the rewards, Okay.

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Speaker 4: So it started off with her just being interested in

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Speaker 4: serving me.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 4: Technically, she is also identified as a lesbian right at

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Speaker 4: the time when we when we met her, because we

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Speaker 4: both met her in the same SPINTI what, you fucked her?

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Speaker 1: No, I'm just going well, she said, technically she was

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Speaker 1: a lesbian. Okay, okay, okay, she identified as a lesson

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Speaker 1: work identified and I respect a person's identity.

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Speaker 4: Okay, But what it was is that, like I met

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Speaker 4: her the first time she got together with me. Outside

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Speaker 4: of that, we went to like she came with me

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Speaker 4: to a live show to be my support, so I

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Speaker 4: can see how she assisted me in a professional capacity.

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Speaker 1: She was so she came in a little white button

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Speaker 1: down shirt and everything. I was like, oh serious. She

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Speaker 1: had my snacks and you know, my favorite drinks and

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Speaker 1: stuff in the car, and I was like me, one

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Speaker 1: of them got a little potential here. I liked it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: People, It's so funny because people went in the back,

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Speaker 1: you know, backstage area while we were getting ready for it,

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Speaker 1: and you know, she was just like feeding my food

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Speaker 1: and pulling up my boots, and everybody was just like,

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Speaker 1: I think I'm doing everything wrong in life, and all

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Speaker 1: I had to do was start fuckings.

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Speaker 4: But you got to think about it, like in BDS

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Speaker 4: and everybody looks at it from the pro side or

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Speaker 4: people who do it just for monetization. There are people

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Speaker 4: who live this right and they have living slaves, they

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Speaker 4: have people who you know, and if you think about

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Speaker 4: it from going back in time, those butlers and people

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Speaker 4: who handle the properties and all those type of things,

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Speaker 4: technically those that was like a house of service. So

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Speaker 4: for me, if you're gonna fit into my lifestyle, this

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Speaker 4: is not just a one off thing. I need to

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Speaker 4: see how you operate in each of them. So she

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Speaker 4: would do that, she would do, you know, different things.

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Speaker 4: After about three or four months, that was the first

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Speaker 4: time I introduced her to my little ones. I was like, hey,

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Speaker 4: this is much like just like I would introduce any

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Speaker 4: other female friends. And it was a good connection. Her

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Speaker 4: reward system was pretty simple. She really she responded to

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Speaker 4: She loved rough play, she loved heavy impact or whatever

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Speaker 4: the case is. And then also I was kind of

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Speaker 4: working with her on building her confidence. So a lot

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Speaker 4: of stuff that I would do sometimes would be forcing

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Speaker 4: her to affirm herself through pleasure or whatever the cases.

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Speaker 4: So sometimes it was with toys or whatever the cases,

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Speaker 4: but typically it would be that she could It could

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Speaker 4: be climbing in my bathtub with me and just like

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Speaker 4: laying there or whatever the case is, wanting.

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Speaker 1: You a little more.

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Speaker 2: By by the way, you were probably the best affirmer

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Speaker 2: I've ever not because we we.

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Speaker 1: Check that out.

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Speaker 2: Y'all could hear what I got to experience. And literally,

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Speaker 2: words of affirmations is my last love language. But oh yeah,

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Speaker 2: I don't need you to tell me I'm bitch. I

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Speaker 2: am so like I'm not someone who needs that that

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Speaker 2: kind of, like everything else comes first, words of affirmations

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Speaker 2: is last. However, receiving them from you in the capacity

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Speaker 2: that I received it in Jamaica, I know, I swear

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Speaker 2: to God. I was like, and I don't know if

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Speaker 2: you're I love that You're gonna give us some examples

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Speaker 2: of it. But when I tell you I had never

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Speaker 2: it made my pussy jump a little bit. And my

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Speaker 2: pussy had already just just done a lot. But being

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Speaker 2: affirmed by you in after care, O you when I

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Speaker 2: tell you maybe one of the best experiences in terms

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Speaker 2: of that. So would love for you to give what

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Speaker 2: that is like for her.

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Speaker 1: Well, so let's do a little role play of with

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Speaker 1: what forced affirmation looks like. Okay, so I'm gonna give

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Speaker 1: you that scenario of like, so you can understand she

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Speaker 1: had just gotten a new promotion but wasn't really feeling

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Speaker 1: like she deserved it. People were you know how it

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Speaker 1: is when you get the job that every other people wanted,

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Speaker 1: they have this way of saying she didn't deserve it

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Speaker 1: and X, Y and z. So, for example, it might

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Speaker 1: sound crazy, but like, let's just say you came to

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Speaker 1: me you had a stressle dead at work. People were

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Speaker 1: being shady, people were.

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Speaker 4: This and this and that, and I'm like, we're gonna

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Speaker 4: reset that, right, And so it could start off with

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Speaker 4: like mild touch and decompression and kind of just taking

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Speaker 4: a moment to get center. But once I start bringing

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Speaker 4: pleasure into play, right, it's like I'm gonna spank you

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Speaker 4: until you tell me you deserve that job. Oh right,

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Speaker 4: And there's a lot of like really intense connection. But

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Speaker 4: it might be just like, how are you feeling right now,

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Speaker 4: and she could say, I'm tell the truth, I'm not

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Speaker 4: feeling worthy.

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Speaker 1: Okay. What is our goal today? What are we working on.

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Speaker 1: We're working on me feeling better about myself. Okay, and

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Speaker 1: by the end of this you will feel better about yourself. Correct.

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Speaker 4: Yes, it's true, you see, and it brings the little girl.

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Speaker 4: I'm so happy you did this. Yeah, but it's a

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Speaker 4: it's a it's a response of like you just want

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Speaker 4: to at first, the day has already been kicking your ass,

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Speaker 4: and people have already been hating on you, and you're

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Speaker 4: already feeling like that.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 4: I'm not looking to punish you and make you feel

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Speaker 4: worse at this point, but technically I call it punishment, right, cute,

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Speaker 4: let's have a good time. So it could start off

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Speaker 4: with those things. It could start off with me grabbing

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Speaker 4: her face and choking and telling me are you worthy?

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Speaker 1: Do you think you deserve me choking your face right now? No? No, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie so powerful.

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Speaker 2: Oh my fucking god, no, literally, and and I think

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Speaker 2: even hearing and I guess that's the other dynamic I

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Speaker 2: do want to ask. I know y'all are switches, but

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Speaker 2: who's more If I'm watching you. If y'all are watching

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Speaker 2: on YouTube, you have a very dominant presence. What's crazy

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Speaker 2: is again, if you're watching, you see him and you

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Speaker 2: would think dominance, but he comes across so soft in

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Speaker 2: your presence. And that was something that was so dope

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Speaker 2: to witness, because when you think of a big, strong man,

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Speaker 2: you immediately think of someone who just is dominant, is powerful.

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Speaker 2: And again, if you guys listen to the Patreon episode,

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Speaker 2: one of the reasons why I wanted to have y'all

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Speaker 2: on is because you your presence gives dominance, but also

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Speaker 2: you're much shorter than you appear.

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Speaker 1: It's so funny. Yes, yeah, yes, really I disagree. Oh no, five,

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Speaker 1: But people, I'm like, because how five, I'm feel tall

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Speaker 1: of you. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: But then meeting him and thinking that he would soften you,

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Speaker 2: you softened him in a way that I hadn't seen done.

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Speaker 1: To a man who presents like physically like you.

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Speaker 3: Well, with her, you know, she's very dominant, but she

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Speaker 3: comes she is submissive with me. Okay, so I get

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Speaker 3: the soft side. Okay, people don't get you know what

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Speaker 3: I'm saying. She's over here, you know, bump of people

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Speaker 3: around giving orders. This that you know, go ahead, go now.

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Speaker 3: She be trying to boss me on. Sometimes I feel

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Speaker 3: like YO, shut off sign.

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Speaker 1: You know what you are. You are the classic example

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Speaker 1: of whenever I used to day falling. Bring a little

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Speaker 1: teddy bear right and everybody in the club be scared

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Speaker 1: of you, and I'll be like my man, right, love.

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Speaker 3: But she has this thing of taking care of a

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Speaker 3: lot of people. People relying her, People depend on her.

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Speaker 3: They calling her everything, every little thing, you know what

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Speaker 3: I'm saying. So who takes care of her? And that's

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Speaker 3: why you see whenho I take care of her, she

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Speaker 3: takes everybody. I take care of her.

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Speaker 2: And I think that that was the best thing that

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Speaker 2: I saw. And I don't know y'all's love languages, but service.

336
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Speaker 2: While you were teaching people, while you were affirming everyone,

337
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Speaker 2: while you were just being you what, It's almost like

338
00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:10,800
Speaker 2: you read her mind immediately. You were up getting her napkins,

339
00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:13,040
Speaker 2: wiping her if she was sweating, baby, do you need water?

340
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Speaker 2: And I think for a lot of men, how they

341
00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:19,760
Speaker 2: can show up with a powerful woman, you don't A

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Speaker 2: lot of times they either don't know where they sit

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Speaker 2: to the back. So it's really dope just seeing you

344
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Speaker 2: no shame showing.

345
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Speaker 3: Up to serve her in that space, this woman. You

346
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Speaker 3: know what I'm saying, It's like, if not me, then who.

347
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Speaker 1: Let's talk about someone judging on the outside and thinking like, oh,

348
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Speaker 1: she was slapping him up.

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Speaker 4: Oh you know what, you know I should say this, right, Yeah,

350
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Speaker 4: he brings the little girl out of me too. He

351
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Speaker 4: brings the teenage girl out of me too. But I

352
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,520
Speaker 4: think because I'm the eldest of not just my my

353
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Speaker 4: mother's children, but like the generation of those children, I'm

354
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Speaker 4: the first grand the first whatever.

355
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Speaker 1: So I'm I used to leadership roles.

356
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Speaker 4: I went to a military school, okay, so also was

357
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Speaker 4: a commanding officer in my school. So I'm used to

358
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Speaker 4: like being the person who has that order of control

359
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Speaker 4: or whatever the case is.

360
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Speaker 1: That's a natural role for me. Right.

361
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Speaker 4: Having somebody who you can be submissive to really means

362
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Speaker 4: having someone whose leadership you can trust.

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Speaker 1: Right.

364
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Speaker 4: And when I say that is there's a lot of

365
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Speaker 4: guys out there who think dominance looks raw raw.

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Speaker 1: Or just because you're a big dude, you gotta post up.

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Speaker 4: I said from him, like maybe three weeks into dating,

368
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Speaker 4: he has this suggestive dominance, right, And I knew, U ha,

369
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Speaker 4: I have this, I will tell you guys, And it

370
00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:42,440
Speaker 4: was like altering to me. The moment I knew I

371
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Speaker 4: could be submissive to him was actually year one. Three

372
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Speaker 4: weeks later, my birthday was coming up, right, and typically

373
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Speaker 4: I'm planning everything, I'm telling everybody way to me, and

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Speaker 4: I really didn't want those responsibilities.

375
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Speaker 1: But I have a car that can hold eight people.

376
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Speaker 4: My family is used to me being sometimes the person

377
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Speaker 4: who pick up everybody to get them there. And I

378
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:03,080
Speaker 4: was talking about that and he was like, well, honey,

379
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:05,680
Speaker 4: I was thinking, and this is the suggestion, right, I

380
00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:09,959
Speaker 4: was thinking that you could park your car or leave

381
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Speaker 4: your car with them.

382
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Speaker 1: You know, I would be with you.

383
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,639
Speaker 4: I could drive you up there, drive with you up there,

384
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Speaker 4: you leave the car and I'll bring you back. I

385
00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:19,160
Speaker 4: will drive you where we're going on your birthday, because

386
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Speaker 4: if you're driving your car, you become the designated driver

387
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Speaker 4: and then you're not having as much fun as.

388
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Speaker 1: You would want to on your birthday. All right, just

389
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Speaker 1: so thoughtful. How do you go? How do you combat that?

390
00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:32,880
Speaker 1: How do I you almost lookteriaized.

391
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Speaker 4: You know, it's like, how do I say to that person,

392
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Speaker 4: I'm doing what I want that makes no logical sense.

393
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Speaker 1: I'd be fighting my own.

394
00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,600
Speaker 4: Like, you know, you're right, Actually, I can't get fucked

395
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,479
Speaker 4: up if I gotta drive, So that night on him,

396
00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:50,080
Speaker 4: I'm facing the bottle jack and not a care in

397
00:18:50,119 --> 00:18:51,680
Speaker 4: the world. It's not a care in the world. And

398
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,680
Speaker 4: you just see him look like security like he always do,

399
00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:54,439
Speaker 4: and she's like that.

400
00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:57,080
Speaker 1: Just you know, I'm having a moment that I don't

401
00:18:57,080 --> 00:19:00,280
Speaker 1: even know with you. And I hate to say this

402
00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:03,119
Speaker 1: out loud because I've just found a great love and

403
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,960
Speaker 1: a lot of my homegirls are single. But when my

404
00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:07,760
Speaker 1: friends have been through pain, when they're the one that

405
00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:09,600
Speaker 1: everybody leans on in the family and they get a

406
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:13,440
Speaker 1: good fucking man, cause niggas ain't shit. But when you

407
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:17,280
Speaker 1: get the ones that are, yeah, you're just like and

408
00:19:17,359 --> 00:19:20,440
Speaker 1: it really can be healing a bit, not because of

409
00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:23,680
Speaker 1: the man, but just because of you get to finally

410
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,919
Speaker 1: have a caretaker a bit girl friend was a caretaker

411
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:28,960
Speaker 1: from me too. You know. It's not always male presenting,

412
00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,520
Speaker 1: but like just to have that in your life when

413
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Speaker 1: you are like the leader of a household, like I'm

414
00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:36,080
Speaker 1: my parents are my kids, you know what I'm saying.

415
00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:38,080
Speaker 4: So it's like, what do you do, They're all it's

416
00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:40,159
Speaker 4: the same. I'm in the same space when it comes

417
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:41,920
Speaker 4: to out with your own parents. You're a thousand percent

418
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Speaker 4: on it.

419
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,920
Speaker 1: And I tell people all the time, even in my relationship,

420
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Speaker 1: I've navigated a lot, depression all of that, and people

421
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:48,520
Speaker 1: are like, how how does it hit you now? And

422
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:51,159
Speaker 1: I'm like, I finally felt safe enough to fall apart. Right.

423
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Speaker 4: So, even those type of things, when you're the person

424
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:57,280
Speaker 4: who's always having to have the answers, there's no room

425
00:19:57,359 --> 00:19:59,679
Speaker 4: for you to not be you know, within your power

426
00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 4: at all times or whatever the case is. So I

427
00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:05,959
Speaker 4: became a master compartmentalizer, right. I knew how to like, oh,

428
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:07,280
Speaker 4: let me talk this here, I'll come back to it

429
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:10,640
Speaker 4: later maybe right. And then I started to realize over time,

430
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:13,360
Speaker 4: while I was going to therapy and quote unquote doing

431
00:20:13,440 --> 00:20:16,080
Speaker 4: the work or whatever, which I did at the point

432
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:19,960
Speaker 4: of what I could until I had somebody in my

433
00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:23,560
Speaker 4: life him right, who I realized that when I'm not

434
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,399
Speaker 4: at a hundred, he's at a two hundred.

435
00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:27,200
Speaker 1: Right.

436
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,159
Speaker 4: That's what made me realize, like, you don't have to

437
00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:34,120
Speaker 4: be that person all the time. You can say today's

438
00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:36,480
Speaker 4: a shitty day. I don't have it in me today.

439
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:38,720
Speaker 4: I didn't there was no room for those.

440
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 2: I think a lot of dominant independent women who again

441
00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:47,359
Speaker 2: are in those positions, find it hard to sometimes be

442
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:49,680
Speaker 2: like I ain't got it today because they always have

443
00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:52,399
Speaker 2: to have it. So to find a partner that you

444
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,240
Speaker 2: could say that too, and you could be like, it

445
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:56,359
Speaker 2: ain't in me today, and you feel like he can

446
00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:58,680
Speaker 2: pick up or they can pick up, because it could

447
00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:02,040
Speaker 2: be you know, either, or is great to experience when

448
00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:02,920
Speaker 2: you do experience.

449
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:04,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, And that's I think where the switch comes in

450
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,200
Speaker 1: because if you look at the relationship, he's the lead,

451
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,080
Speaker 1: hands down, right, he's the lead.

452
00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:12,879
Speaker 4: But we also look at it in a situation of

453
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,400
Speaker 4: based on a scenario circumstance, who's the best to lead?

454
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,920
Speaker 1: Right? I have skill sets that it's like, okay, yeah,

455
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:20,600
Speaker 1: you could be demand.

456
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,320
Speaker 4: So for the sake of pounding your chest, we're gonna

457
00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,120
Speaker 4: take the harder road, even though I'm qualified to make

458
00:21:25,160 --> 00:21:27,960
Speaker 4: this road or this trip an hour lesson time. We're

459
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 4: just gonna do that for the sake of pounding your chest.

460
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:33,240
Speaker 4: It's a lot of those dudes, y'all know what I mean.

461
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 4: And it's just kind of like how many women just

462
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:36,919
Speaker 4: sit back and be like okay, and then the end,

463
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:42,000
Speaker 4: I don't have a man who is too prideful to

464
00:21:42,160 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 4: say this is for you to lead, right, That to

465
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:47,440
Speaker 4: me is that I don't want to ask too.

466
00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:50,720
Speaker 2: Before we get to some of our segments for the

467
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,160
Speaker 2: show today, she pled her case for the sub.

468
00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 1: I would love to know what case you want.

469
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:01,879
Speaker 3: I I try to believe arcade, but she was like,

470
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:03,680
Speaker 3: I'm your sub, and I was like, all right.

471
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:06,360
Speaker 1: Cash to have another way to have another sub.

472
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:10,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like but that favored me. But she's my sub

473
00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:12,560
Speaker 3: and she said I could do all the things.

474
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,800
Speaker 1: That you now tell me. Where does to me? I'm

475
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 1: surprised at that one because it's not super intimate, which

476
00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:22,080
Speaker 1: most of us ethically nominogaus clubles like. We don't want

477
00:22:22,119 --> 00:22:25,760
Speaker 1: nobody getting too my man. Tell me what about that

478
00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:27,879
Speaker 1: made you uncomfortable? I'll tell you this.

479
00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:31,840
Speaker 4: I think it was at the time, because this is important, right,

480
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:34,879
Speaker 4: this is almost a year ago that that conversation took place.

481
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:38,720
Speaker 4: At the time, we were still fortifying us, right, I

482
00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:40,920
Speaker 4: had when we met, I was already in the life

483
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:43,120
Speaker 4: of being in these things and having subs or whatever case.

484
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,960
Speaker 4: This is more like a continuation, but more so, I

485
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:50,399
Speaker 4: needed him to understand what service he needed. So you

486
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 4: have to play the case of outside of what I

487
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:55,320
Speaker 4: do for you, what is going to be needed? And

488
00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,119
Speaker 4: at the time I didn't feel like he had that answer.

489
00:22:57,240 --> 00:22:59,840
Speaker 1: And also, what what am I not willing to do?

490
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:04,000
Speaker 2: I think that when I think of ethical non monogamy,

491
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:07,960
Speaker 2: I don't believe anyone should go without. Yeah, And so

492
00:23:08,280 --> 00:23:12,280
Speaker 2: if we're in a relationship, like I remember the conversation

493
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,240
Speaker 2: being around like I like to pay.

494
00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 1: Clearly you know what I mean.

495
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 2: A lot of my partners, probably every partner that I've

496
00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:21,879
Speaker 2: been with, was not into it. And so the conversation

497
00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:24,760
Speaker 2: became not if I could just go fuck whoever just

498
00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:27,359
Speaker 2: to fuck him. If there's a kink or thing that

499
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 2: I desire that you're not down for, can I do

500
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:34,240
Speaker 2: it with someone else? And so hearing you talk about that,

501
00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:38,120
Speaker 2: it's like, Okay, well was there something and clearly there wasn't.

502
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:40,840
Speaker 2: But did he want something that you weren't willing to do?

503
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:44,000
Speaker 2: And clearly at that point you were like I didn't

504
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 2: feel so, But I mean you, what do you feel, babe?

505
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:48,280
Speaker 3: Answer?

506
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:52,520
Speaker 1: You still don't have an answer. Maybe it's just pleasure seeking.

507
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 1: Maybe it's just the idea of or is it? Could

508
00:23:55,840 --> 00:23:59,400
Speaker 1: it be that? I think sometimes with sub and dom

509
00:23:59,520 --> 00:24:04,399
Speaker 1: rolls deep relationships or committed relationships. That's what I meant. Maybe, Kasha,

510
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 1: you can't donald way you want? You do you feel

511
00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:09,320
Speaker 1: like maybe another stub you could go harder with? Like

512
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:12,439
Speaker 1: what do you think it could be well with her?

513
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:16,680
Speaker 3: Basically it's a blank canvas. Okay, I can definitely shoot

514
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 3: in time. She's like, choke me hard. I'm like, okay,

515
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:25,960
Speaker 3: you know that's my gentle flower. So I'd be like, okay, or.

516
00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:31,560
Speaker 1: So I just told him yesterday we were we were

517
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:35,160
Speaker 1: about to have sex. I was like, he is such

518
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,639
Speaker 1: like a gentleman with his sexual requests, like not like

519
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,240
Speaker 1: I've never heard him say come just like suck or whatever.

520
00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:43,920
Speaker 4: Never ever ever have he has he ever said that

521
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,040
Speaker 4: to me? But he would like, honey, I would like

522
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 4: some head if you would be willing.

523
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 3: No, I can't do it. He's not where are you

524
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 3: from from Brooklyn?

525
00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 1: You are in Brooklyn, Flatbush? You from Flatbush?

526
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,360
Speaker 4: You'll get sucked by Okay, wait he's I mean he's

527
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,640
Speaker 4: he's grew up with a lot of respect to parent, household.

528
00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:09,520
Speaker 4: Parents married for five decades type. So his I mean,

529
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:11,320
Speaker 4: you know, he's got to I think for him it's

530
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 4: a respect thing.

531
00:25:12,160 --> 00:25:15,359
Speaker 1: Do you be wanting. Oh yeah, he's gotten he's gotten

532
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:17,119
Speaker 1: better with it. He's gotten better with But in the

533
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:20,240
Speaker 1: beginning anything, that's where the boundaries came in. In the beginning,

534
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:23,879
Speaker 1: saying like bitch to me wasn't was a boundary from

535
00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:26,480
Speaker 1: he he couldn't do it, so so I would be

536
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:29,520
Speaker 1: in bed I like, I like slut, like horror, like

537
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:31,560
Speaker 1: bitch and depending on the context, right.

538
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 4: So instead the trade off was like, while we be

539
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,040
Speaker 4: doing things, I might say I'm a message, right am

540
00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:38,840
Speaker 4: I such an I would say it and let him

541
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:42,640
Speaker 4: confirm it, so like until I felt like he's comfortable

542
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:44,680
Speaker 4: if he's never comfortable with it. I was also okay

543
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,359
Speaker 4: with me being the one to say it and him

544
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:50,320
Speaker 4: just agree, yes you are you goodness, just tell me

545
00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:51,160
Speaker 4: what I need to hear.

546
00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:53,600
Speaker 1: But I think that that's where that's where I say,

547
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:54,640
Speaker 1: you define in the boundaries.

548
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:57,760
Speaker 4: I cannot overstep the fact that he's somebody who's been

549
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,600
Speaker 4: raised his whole life to not be that dude and

550
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,800
Speaker 4: then tell him to suddenly be that dude comfortably.

551
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 1: It would not be real because that dude is the

552
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:06,159
Speaker 1: reason you fell in love. Yeah, and it wouldn't be

553
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,639
Speaker 1: authentic like that dude is the one that drove the car.

554
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:11,520
Speaker 1: That's the problem. We thinking we want some fucking rough

555
00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,680
Speaker 1: nig all the tongue. I mean, don't you know what

556
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,479
Speaker 1: I mean? You want Krystal.

557
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 3: But I.

558
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:23,840
Speaker 4: Say, though, what I will say is at the time

559
00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,600
Speaker 4: she started off with service to me, eventually she had

560
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:30,159
Speaker 4: gotten so comfortable with him, like because of just who

561
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,840
Speaker 4: he is, and she he didn't have the creepish tendencies

562
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:35,640
Speaker 4: that men had that made her uncomfortable. So over time

563
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:39,280
Speaker 4: she also didn't just serve me like she might have

564
00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:42,680
Speaker 4: been dedicated to me. But if she brought me food,

565
00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,560
Speaker 4: he was brought food if I couldn't you know he was.

566
00:26:45,560 --> 00:26:47,320
Speaker 1: In the hospital for a while one point after a

567
00:26:47,359 --> 00:26:50,120
Speaker 1: serious car accident, and when I had to like travel

568
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:51,680
Speaker 1: and she was still back, she would go to the

569
00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:53,920
Speaker 1: hospital and checking on him and take things and do

570
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,840
Speaker 1: so she he still received service from the person who

571
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,280
Speaker 1: was serving me. And now I think we're at a

572
00:26:59,359 --> 00:27:02,400
Speaker 1: point because we've co topped. We were as a pot.

573
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 1: We now we have both together tag teamed and topped

574
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 1: these words. How then am I still here public learning

575
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:12,679
Speaker 1: a new gender?

576
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:15,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, co top like co top, So like you know,

577
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:18,560
Speaker 4: in a in a in a BDS setting, you're having

578
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 4: a scene, the bottom being the democrats because not everybody

579
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,920
Speaker 4: identifies a sub or you know, different things, So the

580
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,800
Speaker 4: bottom being the person who's demonstrated, on the top being

581
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:28,320
Speaker 4: the people who are facilitating.

582
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:33,680
Speaker 1: So we have together co top kind of right, kind

583
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 1: of what you so, yeah, it would be considered top

584
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:39,560
Speaker 1: with you and marvelous. So we've both taken.

585
00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 4: Both of us have stepped into our dominant at the

586
00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:48,120
Speaker 4: same time and taken on a submissive at In fact,

587
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:52,000
Speaker 4: that's the technically when I'm when she I was, you know,

588
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:55,399
Speaker 4: and she was just looking at it whispering. I was like,

589
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:57,159
Speaker 4: because I'm trying to I'm trying to make sure you

590
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,680
Speaker 4: don't have too many bleeps to do here, but we're

591
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:02,680
Speaker 4: already oh well, I'm a sucking dick. And she was

592
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 4: looking at it with this like salivating look, and I'm like,

593
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:09,639
Speaker 4: for lesbian, you see, really interested in this, Like like

594
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:11,440
Speaker 4: I'm in a room just casually this when she was

595
00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 4: like cleaning the kitchen and stuff and she has to

596
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 4: come in the room and put something down and she

597
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:18,119
Speaker 4: just cleaned the kitchen while I am yeah, and so

598
00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:21,240
Speaker 4: she was just like again, she was like, Goddess, you

599
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:24,280
Speaker 4: just make it look so tasty, and I was like,

600
00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:27,159
Speaker 4: you want to taste it? But then but then I

601
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 4: had to talk to her like, let's be play. Let's

602
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:31,480
Speaker 4: make sure that this is what you want right because

603
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:32,600
Speaker 4: coheresion is not the thing.

604
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,720
Speaker 1: We do over here. And you told me that this

605
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:36,639
Speaker 1: was a boundary for you, and now you're looking like

606
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:38,400
Speaker 1: you want to crush your own boundaries. So we had

607
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 1: to have a long talk. But after that talk, how

608
00:28:40,040 --> 00:28:41,960
Speaker 1: long was the talk before she got on her knee

609
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 1: before he got sought? It wasn't that long. And he

610
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:46,520
Speaker 1: wasn't gonna get soft at the thought of any of this. So,

611
00:28:47,520 --> 00:28:50,400
Speaker 1: so you know, here casually, so you're sure you feel

612
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 1: like you sure you don't, you know, babe, how do

613
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,480
Speaker 1: you feel about this? And so you know, so what

614
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:02,680
Speaker 1: she said was teach me. Oh yeah, he was a

615
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:08,240
Speaker 1: good teacher. You know, hey, my middle name, What the

616
00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:10,160
Speaker 1: fuck is going through your hair? And this bitch Kobe.

617
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:13,920
Speaker 3: I was like, this is happening. Cool, that's cool. You

618
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:14,480
Speaker 3: know what I'm saying.

619
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:18,760
Speaker 6: The problem I'm with it I might of like, yeah,

620
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:25,080
Speaker 6: I love invent he was, yeah, he he be turned

621
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 6: into a little he should have showed this, you know

622
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:28,880
Speaker 6: what I'm saying.

623
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:31,600
Speaker 3: But in my mind, I was definitely wilent. I was like,

624
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 3: this is happening because you was.

625
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 1: Waiting for it in your mind. But in your mind

626
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:37,320
Speaker 1: you also knew that this was something.

627
00:29:37,160 --> 00:29:40,440
Speaker 4: That just like she said, I've experienced that and it's

628
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,160
Speaker 4: not the first time I've got it a penis into

629
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:42,760
Speaker 4: someone's mouth.

630
00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 1: So this is right up my alley here, right here here,

631
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:48,959
Speaker 1: this is the friend of them. So I'm giving her

632
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 1: teach this this that you want to put a little

633
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: bit of pressure out of me. Yeah, yeah, And then

634
00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,480
Speaker 1: I was affirming her, Oh, you're doing so good. Open

635
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:58,120
Speaker 1: your mouth a little while. I want you to breathe

636
00:29:58,120 --> 00:29:58,480
Speaker 1: down this.

637
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,640
Speaker 4: And so after a while, since you know, she got

638
00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 4: she started to get a little more comfortable, and then

639
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 4: you know, we were doing it together and I'm like, okay,

640
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:05,840
Speaker 4: just meet me at the top and kiss me each

641
00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:08,600
Speaker 4: time and whatever whatever, and she was just like okay,

642
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 4: and I'm like, you're doing good.

643
00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:10,840
Speaker 1: So but she liked her hair being pulled.

644
00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 4: At one point, I'm grabbing her hair I'm spanking her,

645
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:15,120
Speaker 4: and as I start doing those things, now she starts

646
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 4: going harder and harder, and I'm like, she do a good.

647
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:21,960
Speaker 1: Job for the first time. That was her first. Yeah,

648
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:26,400
Speaker 1: she was a lesbian, but was she identified?

649
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:30,240
Speaker 4: I feel like she's I feel like she has you know,

650
00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 4: everybody has their college days. She definitely spoke to me

651
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:35,040
Speaker 4: about her college days. But I don't think that she

652
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:36,600
Speaker 4: ever really had an attraction to.

653
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 1: Twenty years you win. I'm not gonna lie.

654
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was pretty it was pretty interesting, but in

655
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:44,680
Speaker 4: the end, and it was well what I probably should

656
00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 4: mentioned this also, my friend was there eeping because it

657
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 4: was my birthday weekend.

658
00:30:48,520 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: But oh wait, wait, wait wait, this was the whole

659
00:30:50,960 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 1: thing was filmed. It was like impromptu, my homegirl. Let

660
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 1: me tell you, gotta have the right friends you had

661
00:30:56,320 --> 00:30:58,400
Speaker 1: y'all got to have the right friends. She saw what

662
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:01,680
Speaker 1: was going down, she was like, everybody go with on. Cool.

663
00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 1: If you actually listen to the audio of what was

664
00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:07,600
Speaker 1: going on, She's like, wait, wait, she was cleaning in

665
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:10,040
Speaker 1: the kitchen. Where was your friend in the living room.

666
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:12,560
Speaker 1: In the living room, you get content?

667
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:13,120
Speaker 3: What was going on?

668
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:16,200
Speaker 1: We weren't making content, but the minute that these things straight.

669
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,960
Speaker 1: She came into the room when she so my friend

670
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:21,680
Speaker 1: happened to leave the living room and noticed what was

671
00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 1: going on in the bedroom, and I said, I said,

672
00:31:25,720 --> 00:31:27,960
Speaker 1: She was like, this was your your birthday wish Green said,

673
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:29,560
Speaker 1: you wanted to suck on some day girls.

674
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 4: So that's all my friends talking. She got the little

675
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,640
Speaker 4: southernish kind of like soft toe. So once she realized

676
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,400
Speaker 4: what was going on, and it starts out with me

677
00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:39,480
Speaker 4: doing this, and then she comes over to my sub

678
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 4: and she was like, go please your go.

679
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 1: She was like ahead, she was like, go ahead, go

680
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:46,320
Speaker 1: please your goddess. So she starts she was like, you're

681
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 1: doing such a good job. Look she likes it. So

682
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:51,560
Speaker 1: she starts affirming her and it's soft like she sounds

683
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: like the person you find the way if y'all were

684
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 1: watching on know me mezy just saying here like anytime

685
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,280
Speaker 1: I can hear somebody have a more slutty life to me,

686
00:32:01,160 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, whoa, this is real. And I think, you know,

687
00:32:03,800 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 1: I'm trying to do a good job and not. And

688
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:08,160
Speaker 1: we're like Mandy's outlining a bit. You're you're you're actually

689
00:32:08,200 --> 00:32:10,920
Speaker 1: the problem, y'all. We are thirty five minutes, y'all niggas

690
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:12,240
Speaker 1: got too much? Do y'all live together?

691
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:12,720
Speaker 3: Yeah?

692
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:17,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, let's ask because I feel like us watching

693
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:20,320
Speaker 1: home and us on the couch, we're like, how often

694
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:23,760
Speaker 1: are y'all fucking? Because we watch couples like this on

695
00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 1: a show, like decision decisions, horrible decisions. We're like, oh,

696
00:32:26,480 --> 00:32:28,480
Speaker 1: they must have you know, it's all the time, Like,

697
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 1: is it really like this, y'all? Fuck? Every day? Ah?

698
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 1: Every day? Not every day.

699
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 3: It could be every day if time permits every day.

700
00:32:38,880 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 3: But there were me working, you know, being tired sometimes,

701
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 3: but if it's like a day off, yes, every day.

702
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 1: What supplements are you taking to get you ready to go?

703
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:49,240
Speaker 1: Every goddamn baby?

704
00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 4: It's the hormone surge that you get when you got

705
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:55,160
Speaker 4: the right person. I don't need a supplement. He drives

706
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:56,240
Speaker 4: the dopamine for sure.

707
00:32:56,640 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 1: Oh I don't think.

708
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 4: I think that that's the biggest thing with arousal that

709
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:04,080
Speaker 4: people miss. Right, your body literally is gonna respond your nerve.

710
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,480
Speaker 4: You have somebody who relaxes the nervous system. That's the

711
00:33:06,560 --> 00:33:08,640
Speaker 4: first thing because most people want to it with like

712
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,400
Speaker 4: some anxiety. I don't have that right when you have a.

713
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:14,320
Speaker 1: Person who's touch literally like sues you.

714
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:16,200
Speaker 4: He has like these super warm I call them like

715
00:33:16,280 --> 00:33:19,680
Speaker 4: natural heated warmers or whatever. Like I'm always cold as ship,

716
00:33:19,760 --> 00:33:21,680
Speaker 4: and then as soon as he touches me, everything warms up.

717
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 1: So the Kevin gate hands is curzy. They're they're they're

718
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:29,720
Speaker 1: always no, they're very always warm. It's like if you

719
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:31,640
Speaker 1: get a massage, it's like building hot stones.

720
00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 4: So so he touches me, and I'm like, you know,

721
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:39,680
Speaker 4: but also, I don't have any emotional trauma in my relationship.

722
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:41,640
Speaker 4: I don't have any argument that still comes to the

723
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 4: next argument. I don't have like every time we go

724
00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:46,200
Speaker 4: through something, it feels like the first time we went

725
00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:46,720
Speaker 4: through something.

726
00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:47,360
Speaker 1: In the past.

727
00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:49,680
Speaker 4: I've had relationships where every time they do something, I'm

728
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 4: like you that last time is Cincinnati.

729
00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 1: I think resolution is super cy like.

730
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 4: And so we can literally end a conversation and step

731
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:01,680
Speaker 4: right into it because after it's done, it's done.

732
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:02,560
Speaker 1: We don't fight each other.

733
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:05,800
Speaker 4: We fight the circumstance, right, and so it's never a

734
00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:08,160
Speaker 4: matter of where I'm feeling like he talked to me

735
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,440
Speaker 4: a certain way or I talk to him a certain way.

736
00:34:10,480 --> 00:34:12,240
Speaker 1: It's like this is my point, this is my perspective.

737
00:34:12,280 --> 00:34:13,759
Speaker 1: Here's your point, your perspective, where we.

738
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:16,359
Speaker 4: Land in, right, So, because I don't have a person

739
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:20,000
Speaker 4: who triggers me twenty four to seven or whatever the

740
00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:21,800
Speaker 4: case is, it's like my body's always available.

741
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:23,719
Speaker 2: And that's probably the problem with a lot of people

742
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:26,359
Speaker 2: and how they date. They get people that reminds them

743
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:29,319
Speaker 2: of the last nigga who did the fucked up shit.

744
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:34,080
Speaker 2: And so now you're coming in being triggered at everything

745
00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:35,760
Speaker 2: he's doing because it's reminding.

746
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:36,960
Speaker 1: You or the last one pretty much.

747
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,080
Speaker 2: So we're gonna get into truth and there, oh ya,

748
00:34:46,080 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 2: I'm gonna start off with you know, I'm gonna make

749
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:51,680
Speaker 2: it simple. It's the Halloween episode. Bitches is dressing up.

750
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:54,400
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna have both of y'all do the truth

751
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:57,040
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna have you do the dare. Okay, So

752
00:34:57,200 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 2: for the truth in the spirit of Halloween, if y'all

753
00:34:59,920 --> 00:35:05,360
Speaker 2: have had to do a fun role play, which characters

754
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 2: would you choose for each other and set the scene?

755
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,440
Speaker 2: So in terms of dressing up role playing and if

756
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,280
Speaker 2: you've done it already, would love to know the story,

757
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 2: but just bringing her costume into it, clearly you know

758
00:35:18,239 --> 00:35:20,840
Speaker 2: we was dressed up and dressed up every day. But like,

759
00:35:21,400 --> 00:35:23,799
Speaker 2: if you could turn her into a character and play

760
00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:24,120
Speaker 2: out a.

761
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:26,239
Speaker 1: Scene, what what would it be?

762
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 3: I think it will be the sexy nurse she was okay,

763
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:37,960
Speaker 3: she had the fish nets. No, but I will pretend

764
00:35:38,719 --> 00:35:42,120
Speaker 3: I'd be like, oh my god, I need to lay down. Yo.

765
00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:45,360
Speaker 3: She is great at role play and she's great at

766
00:35:45,440 --> 00:35:46,480
Speaker 3: dressing up, and so.

767
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:48,759
Speaker 1: The nurse is your favorite. He's gotten the nurse though,

768
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:51,480
Speaker 1: but just not in costume because when he was in

769
00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 1: the hospital, you was role playing in the hospital.

770
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:56,840
Speaker 3: Yes, she was Wait, wait, wait.

771
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:02,040
Speaker 1: In the hospital, wait for technically I know my way

772
00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:04,840
Speaker 1: around the body. Now your whole ass went up the

773
00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 1: mouse sign nine and then what I just like? He

774
00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:10,280
Speaker 1: was you telling baby?

775
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 3: Oh, so let me tell what happened. Right, I couldn't

776
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,719
Speaker 3: walk yet, so literally couldn't walk.

777
00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:19,080
Speaker 1: Shot at his whole femur. Can you role playing in

778
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 1: the hospital? See, let's go.

779
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,160
Speaker 3: So she comes in with the heels. She had like

780
00:36:24,239 --> 00:36:27,480
Speaker 3: a blue body suit with like the mink. She had shades.

781
00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:31,320
Speaker 6: You know what I'm saying exaggerated click clack, click clack,

782
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:32,080
Speaker 6: click clack.

783
00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:34,920
Speaker 3: She said, hey, y'all here to help my man walk.

784
00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:38,120
Speaker 3: And I was like, no, said, I have my two

785
00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:40,480
Speaker 3: homegirls there. She just basically was like, all right, can

786
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:41,719
Speaker 3: you can you bring that to him?

787
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,240
Speaker 1: So I was like damn.

788
00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 3: I was like, was my friends come on? Don't do that?

789
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 3: So that she's over there and they leave Eventually next

790
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:51,560
Speaker 3: you know, she's like, all right, close the door, it's

791
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:55,040
Speaker 3: time for nurse Kinky. And I was like, he had

792
00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:59,600
Speaker 3: a roommate too on others, So that she's over there.

793
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:01,799
Speaker 3: We had like a I had like a support thing.

794
00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 1: I had like a oh his vds and bad we're

795
00:37:04,640 --> 00:37:09,399
Speaker 1: not yes, Oh my god. The thing at the top

796
00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:11,399
Speaker 1: and it was like the little hook thing or whatever.

797
00:37:11,600 --> 00:37:14,560
Speaker 1: It looked like you put a spreader bar. And I

798
00:37:14,680 --> 00:37:17,239
Speaker 1: was like, why is there a building? No, it's it's

799
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:19,919
Speaker 1: your it's the way you view life. No one knows

800
00:37:19,960 --> 00:37:22,600
Speaker 1: in there. There are different people, you know. I did

801
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:24,960
Speaker 1: the pilate ship with the with the four poster one

802
00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:27,239
Speaker 1: yether day and it's this is like the one that

803
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 1: if y'all saw the video pilates by Raven. This is

804
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 1: the white pilates to me, I get up there and

805
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:33,319
Speaker 1: the girls told to Brady say, I said, oh, it's

806
00:37:33,360 --> 00:37:35,440
Speaker 1: kind of kinky. She said no, it's kind of a workout.

807
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 1: Oh nothing correct up here up the road, nurse Kinky.

808
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:45,160
Speaker 3: So then at that point, you know, with the medication

809
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:47,160
Speaker 3: they kept giving me, I thought I had like ed

810
00:37:47,400 --> 00:37:50,120
Speaker 3: now because you know, really close to the hip, close

811
00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:51,959
Speaker 3: to the So I was like, babe, I'm being hard

812
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:54,200
Speaker 3: at all. And she was like, oh, we're gonna fix that.

813
00:37:57,320 --> 00:38:00,680
Speaker 1: And he has like there's someone that can hear all

814
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 1: of this happening, just retrospect.

815
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:10,160
Speaker 4: But I honestly wasn't even thinking about him for me. Okay,

816
00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 4: you gotta imagine you walk into a room. You see

817
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,560
Speaker 4: the love of your life completely on a bed, can't

818
00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:18,480
Speaker 4: do anything for themselves, can't stand, can't whatever, couldn't even

819
00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:19,040
Speaker 4: pull himself up.

820
00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:20,480
Speaker 1: He's holding the phone dog with his mother and the

821
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:22,280
Speaker 1: phone is falling. He couldn't do anything.

822
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:24,680
Speaker 4: And he was on like heavy nerve suppressants right to

823
00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 4: help with the pain, but nerves are also with drive,

824
00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:28,440
Speaker 4: the nerve endings.

825
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:29,239
Speaker 1: In the lord. Yeah.

826
00:38:29,320 --> 00:38:31,640
Speaker 4: So like he's sitting here speaking to me and after

827
00:38:31,719 --> 00:38:33,600
Speaker 4: all of this now he's worried that his dick is

828
00:38:33,640 --> 00:38:35,600
Speaker 4: not going to return after all of this is over.

829
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:38,000
Speaker 4: So I am in the head space I don't care

830
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:40,040
Speaker 4: about nothing else. By the time I leave here today, he.

831
00:38:40,080 --> 00:38:42,680
Speaker 1: Gonna know that Nick is doing fine. Okay, I don't

832
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:44,120
Speaker 1: want you worried about that. We have to get you

833
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 1: on your toes, my friend, so what youre doing him?

834
00:38:47,320 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 1: So then so then I waited to my, my, my,

835
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:53,359
Speaker 1: my whole fanny because I always got a fanny pack,

836
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:57,200
Speaker 1: you know, I like to be hands free. Always got

837
00:38:57,200 --> 00:38:59,080
Speaker 1: a little lube, a little bullet, a little.

838
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:02,440
Speaker 4: Something there, and so I was just like playing with

839
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:04,719
Speaker 4: sensations to see what he would respond to. But I

840
00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:06,440
Speaker 4: was like holding on to the top of the medias

841
00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:09,560
Speaker 4: in bed and I was like hanging over him, and

842
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 4: I was like, spank me, you know, doing all these

843
00:39:11,719 --> 00:39:13,120
Speaker 4: things or whatever the case is. And I was like,

844
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:15,319
Speaker 4: spank me right now, and you know threatening if you don't,

845
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:16,719
Speaker 4: I'm gonna turn it up. Like was it a light

846
00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:19,400
Speaker 4: sank because he was injured. He was starting off with

847
00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:21,000
Speaker 4: this little small thing, but then after a while he

848
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:23,200
Speaker 4: gave me like a grab spank and I was like yeah,

849
00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:26,600
Speaker 4: oh yeah, Like so I'm talking about babe. So you know,

850
00:39:26,760 --> 00:39:29,560
Speaker 4: as I was like rubbing it through the blanket first

851
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:32,719
Speaker 4: and then next under the blanket and just talking to

852
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 4: him here. Yeah, look at my big boy, you just

853
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:39,239
Speaker 4: right there with that big fact, you know, drugging like

854
00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:42,000
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying, just check your blood pressure.

855
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:47,759
Speaker 1: He said, that's my nurse. That's how I know. I'll

856
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 1: tell you what.

857
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:51,840
Speaker 4: He started to feel the reaction, and you know, I

858
00:39:52,040 --> 00:39:53,920
Speaker 4: was like, oh, let's see. I put my lips down

859
00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 4: there for a few seconds, you know, just to kind

860
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,520
Speaker 4: of whatever. And I was like, you're gonna walk to

861
00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 4: that bathroom soon or whatever. You know, I'm going affirmed that.

862
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 1: It worked. He was. He knew at the end of

863
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 1: that day he did that he was not going to

864
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 1: be a problem. It's gonna help every medical professional if

865
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,320
Speaker 1: listening and can't get their patient where they need to go.

866
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,520
Speaker 1: You just got to affirm him. Now, I wouldn't suggest

867
00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:17,000
Speaker 1: you go touch on people. Yeah, don't go touch don't

868
00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:17,800
Speaker 1: lose your jobs.

869
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,080
Speaker 4: But honestly, I think it's just a matter of like

870
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:23,400
Speaker 4: everything is in the mind in his head because he

871
00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:25,120
Speaker 4: was trying to get it to do whatever and it wasn't.

872
00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:27,239
Speaker 4: And now he's got this woman who he knows, the

873
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:28,719
Speaker 4: Cincinnati Like that's a big fear.

874
00:40:28,800 --> 00:40:30,839
Speaker 1: Imagine coming out of a cry accident, thinking I might

875
00:40:30,920 --> 00:40:34,040
Speaker 1: not ever be able to have upset. I am you

876
00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,400
Speaker 1: did the dare without me even reading it.

877
00:40:37,800 --> 00:40:42,399
Speaker 2: There was literally a five cents fantasy describe a thirty

878
00:40:42,440 --> 00:40:45,719
Speaker 2: second scene with touch tastes down the site.

879
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:49,000
Speaker 1: And I did. I tasted it. I touched it. You

880
00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:52,200
Speaker 1: tested and melted. Yeah, I was talking to it. I

881
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,640
Speaker 1: was talking to him. I fed him fried rice after.

882
00:40:55,040 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 1: It was great, like we had you know, it was

883
00:40:57,719 --> 00:41:00,959
Speaker 1: you know, for anyone in the thing that's not a DOM,

884
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:04,719
Speaker 1: I think a great tip for me to you. The

885
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:08,359
Speaker 1: nurse scenario is the easiest one because that nigga gonna

886
00:41:08,360 --> 00:41:11,080
Speaker 1: get sick one day, he gonna have a body ache,

887
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:13,799
Speaker 1: something's gonna happen, and it's the perfect way to turn

888
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:16,160
Speaker 1: into a DOM. You don't think when you hear sexy

889
00:41:16,280 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 1: nurse and patient that it's BDS or like dom bottoms up,

890
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:21,640
Speaker 1: but it actually is. It was my first time I

891
00:41:21,680 --> 00:41:24,040
Speaker 1: ever died my man. We were going to a wedding,

892
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:25,800
Speaker 1: but he was too tired. We hung over from the

893
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:27,600
Speaker 1: night before and he was laid out on the couch.

894
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:30,240
Speaker 1: He's like, I can't do it, and I was like, hey,

895
00:41:30,360 --> 00:41:31,759
Speaker 1: then I have to bring you back to help. But

896
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:33,239
Speaker 1: I do you have to put your dick out. I

897
00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:35,800
Speaker 1: have to help you, have to have to heal you.

898
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:39,839
Speaker 1: You need me that nigga got right, let's go. I'm

899
00:41:39,880 --> 00:41:42,360
Speaker 1: here for you. You're gonna stand. You're gonna walk that

900
00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:46,120
Speaker 1: all three legs anyway to dom all three legs. Now,

901
00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 1: I wanna I want to get into our reactionary because

902
00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,799
Speaker 1: I saw Wait, let me say this real quick.

903
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:53,400
Speaker 4: I'm gonna need you to come home and keep the

904
00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:57,319
Speaker 4: uniform on one day. That's my fantasy. Okay, wait, whoa right?

905
00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:00,879
Speaker 1: He he already works right and he has your gear.

906
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:04,160
Speaker 1: Oh those natures. But I that's what you want him to.

907
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:05,919
Speaker 4: I just want him to tell me what the next

908
00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 4: stop is. I want him to show me with the

909
00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:10,920
Speaker 4: tracks are. I want you to show me with the

910
00:42:11,080 --> 00:42:13,879
Speaker 4: with the roads lead. I want you to signal mind.

911
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:15,320
Speaker 1: You know you get what I'm saying. I want you

912
00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 1: to get in my platform. You know I want to

913
00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:21,920
Speaker 1: get on the same Yeah, I want you to. I

914
00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 1: want to get on the She wanted to do this

915
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:27,000
Speaker 1: role play? Yeah, yeah, she asked for it. You feel

916
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 1: like you gotta have a freshirt ready like Chris Brown

917
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:35,280
Speaker 1: d Express train to make it local if you want, I'm.

918
00:42:35,120 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 3: Fine with that too, be like, yeah, I want to

919
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:38,960
Speaker 3: work and not really go to work and just come

920
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:39,840
Speaker 3: back in the uniform.

921
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:41,440
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm being real, but I don't know if you

922
00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 1: drive me. But I always wanted to fuck every time

923
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:45,400
Speaker 1: because you know, they be looking good and they be

924
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:46,800
Speaker 1: looking at you. When you get off the train, you

925
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:48,960
Speaker 1: see and the niggas be pulling up, I'd be like,

926
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,120
Speaker 1: we just talked about this last night. They're not they

927
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:53,840
Speaker 1: do you know what makes you a pussy jump to

928
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:56,479
Speaker 1: when they see that you missed it? But they opened

929
00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:58,440
Speaker 1: the door and they open the door for you. That

930
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 1: is so nangy. Thank you me like me, I'm I'm

931
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:06,719
Speaker 1: gonna sit in the car right next to your little

932
00:43:06,960 --> 00:43:12,399
Speaker 1: little just show a TV because I was running so late.

933
00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:15,400
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. I want to come Roger.

934
00:43:16,080 --> 00:43:18,279
Speaker 2: It's so funny because my ex was a was a

935
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,880
Speaker 2: retire firefighter and I wanted to fuck him in the

936
00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:23,760
Speaker 2: firefighter uniform. But then do you know they're not allowed

937
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:25,640
Speaker 2: to even bring him home because there's so much like

938
00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:28,960
Speaker 2: it and they're heavy, and I was like, I want

939
00:43:29,000 --> 00:43:35,279
Speaker 2: the real I would literally go on Amazon and look

940
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,839
Speaker 2: at the goddamn firefighter like costumes. None of them hit

941
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,440
Speaker 2: like the real ship and they were like. He was like,

942
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:42,319
Speaker 2: we're not allowed to even bring them home, like there's

943
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 2: too much chemicals.

944
00:43:43,120 --> 00:43:46,759
Speaker 1: What the other one firefighters? Yeah, wait, you want and

945
00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:47,239
Speaker 1: I want you.

946
00:43:47,400 --> 00:43:49,200
Speaker 4: I want him to do it, not the little uniform

947
00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:51,319
Speaker 4: because you know they be fake their uniform sometimes they

948
00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 4: won't do it all the way.

949
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:55,680
Speaker 1: I want the conductor's hat with the little that want

950
00:43:55,719 --> 00:43:59,919
Speaker 1: to be saved. So well, the conductor ain't saving nobody,

951
00:44:00,239 --> 00:44:07,040
Speaker 1: he just riding. You gotta save one place opening doors period. Okay,

952
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:09,640
Speaker 1: look oh you like when the door open, it was

953
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:10,760
Speaker 1: like welcome.

954
00:44:12,920 --> 00:44:15,440
Speaker 3: Literally crazy.

955
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:17,719
Speaker 1: Okay, you know, I see you want to be a

956
00:44:17,760 --> 00:44:20,320
Speaker 1: little wait are you looking? No, I'm not because I

957
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:24,080
Speaker 1: saw the Dominican sex worker video.

958
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:24,520
Speaker 3: Yo.

959
00:44:24,680 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 1: That ship yo, what is that? What's y'all? You gotta

960
00:44:29,719 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 1: go and.

961
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:30,640
Speaker 3: See this video?

962
00:44:31,239 --> 00:44:34,279
Speaker 1: It says me pretending to be a Dominican processes. Wait,

963
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:40,120
Speaker 1: oh that's the road for you know, dominic you're gonna

964
00:44:40,160 --> 00:44:42,120
Speaker 1: sucking my pussy. I don't want nothing.

965
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:47,600
Speaker 3: She was awesome, he said. At all she had the

966
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:49,359
Speaker 3: voice was a little horse from the trip.

967
00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:54,719
Speaker 1: Because you because they say I don't have nothing, like

968
00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 1: I can't give him them like I I thought I

969
00:45:01,440 --> 00:45:03,920
Speaker 1: had it there, I reached down because they touch it

970
00:45:04,640 --> 00:45:06,440
Speaker 1: that they just so.

971
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:12,239
Speaker 2: When I tell you, what made you just randomly jump

972
00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:14,600
Speaker 2: into the scene of a Dominican prostitute.

973
00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:19,839
Speaker 3: I don't know she's happy, she just does ship have y'all.

974
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 1: I said to him, I couldn't figure out where I

975
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:25,120
Speaker 1: put our passports coming back from Jamaica, right, So I

976
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:26,880
Speaker 1: was like, I'm gonna have to get up there and

977
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:30,399
Speaker 1: start sex working for them. They just like I thought

978
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:33,120
Speaker 1: I had and I put it inside and I know

979
00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:43,000
Speaker 1: I tried that. I don't know. So then I just

980
00:45:43,120 --> 00:45:43,720
Speaker 1: never stopped.

981
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:47,920
Speaker 3: You don't get you out of Jamaica.

982
00:45:48,280 --> 00:45:50,279
Speaker 1: It was gonna show. It was gonna keep my ass there.

983
00:45:50,320 --> 00:45:52,799
Speaker 1: And this isn't a good episode for people that are

984
00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:57,160
Speaker 1: in a struggling relationships because y'all need happy, y'all have everything.

985
00:45:58,480 --> 00:46:00,440
Speaker 1: This is too much wealth in to happen.

986
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:03,040
Speaker 4: Well, you know, you have to be like after someone

987
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:05,960
Speaker 4: has had a one year recovery, after someone has had

988
00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:08,960
Speaker 4: a full on depression, and like you have to find

989
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:11,120
Speaker 4: a way to like laugh all the time, like our

990
00:46:11,160 --> 00:46:14,120
Speaker 4: teenage kids run the relationship right, and then the adults

991
00:46:14,200 --> 00:46:16,480
Speaker 4: like payper your kids are five and I have the

992
00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:18,359
Speaker 4: older one it's fourteen, And what about your kids?

993
00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:22,920
Speaker 3: My daughter's nine nine. But what she meant was the

994
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:25,040
Speaker 3: kids within us, the middles within us.

995
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:28,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, like our teenagers are are we break out the house.

996
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:30,360
Speaker 4: We slide down the side of the house, like we

997
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:32,799
Speaker 4: that's the that's the like break out the hell yeah

998
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:35,040
Speaker 4: kind of Like eighty percent of the time we act

999
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:38,160
Speaker 4: like wild teenagers with each other and then like when

1000
00:46:38,200 --> 00:46:40,800
Speaker 4: we have to do adult things, we step into the

1001
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:44,759
Speaker 4: adult thing sucks, it's annoying, and adulting is the part

1002
00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:48,439
Speaker 4: that in relationships makes the relationship no longer fun.

1003
00:46:48,760 --> 00:46:51,880
Speaker 1: It's the bills, it's the parenting, it's the cleaning. Exactly.

1004
00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:53,080
Speaker 1: Fuck we're in.

1005
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:57,480
Speaker 2: Now, we're living in goddamn cheetoh land, Like it is scary,

1006
00:46:58,040 --> 00:47:00,120
Speaker 2: like with what just happening in the world. So to

1007
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:03,560
Speaker 2: be able to go back to a time where politics

1008
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:06,600
Speaker 2: doesn't matter, don't matter, we just want to go out

1009
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:08,359
Speaker 2: and have fun and sneak having sex.

1010
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:09,279
Speaker 1: That makes it.

1011
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 4: That's the teenage side. Like it's not the little girl

1012
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:13,839
Speaker 4: because the little girls good, she's there. Sometimes she gets

1013
00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:16,560
Speaker 4: a little daddy whatever whatever, But most of the time

1014
00:47:16,640 --> 00:47:19,280
Speaker 4: it's like, no, I want to be a liberated teenager

1015
00:47:19,480 --> 00:47:21,239
Speaker 4: or whatever the case is, not a care in the world,

1016
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:25,480
Speaker 4: but also like old enough to be somewhat like your sign.

1017
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:37,000
Speaker 1: Pisces and Aquarius. What Auary not crying? But I also don't. Okay,

1018
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:38,960
Speaker 1: so I know you had, but I want to ask

1019
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:42,120
Speaker 1: you this because being together for three years, even everything

1020
00:47:42,200 --> 00:47:45,400
Speaker 1: you just said, I'm gonna play this clip from Shane O'Neill,

1021
00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 1: and she talks about something that I think a lot

1022
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:51,920
Speaker 1: of people deal with in terms of relationships, and this

1023
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:52,799
Speaker 1: is what she had to say.

1024
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:55,960
Speaker 5: The thing that I wish somebody had told me is

1025
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 5: that there will be different versions of me as I

1026
00:47:58,640 --> 00:48:02,960
Speaker 5: get oldered depletely different versions of me, and those different

1027
00:48:03,120 --> 00:48:10,560
Speaker 5: versions require different people, different spaces, different words, different careers sometimes.

1028
00:48:10,680 --> 00:48:14,399
Speaker 5: So I wish somebody had had told me that, Hey,

1029
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 5: the plan you have at twenty five, and you got

1030
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:20,919
Speaker 5: this whole career and everything planned. I want this many

1031
00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:23,400
Speaker 5: kids and a husband, or I don't want a husband.

1032
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:26,960
Speaker 5: Whatever it is that's so gonna change by thirty and

1033
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,320
Speaker 5: thirty five, Like your whole perspective, You're going to have

1034
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:35,360
Speaker 5: to reintroduce yourself to that person every single time, and

1035
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 5: the people around you are going to have to re

1036
00:48:37,680 --> 00:48:40,120
Speaker 5: meet that person, Yeah, every single time.

1037
00:48:40,640 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 2: So I brought that up because I want to talk

1038
00:48:42,920 --> 00:48:48,200
Speaker 2: about in terms of relationships. For whatever reason, there's never

1039
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 2: the conversation of who you're meeting right now and you're

1040
00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:55,799
Speaker 2: one if we want to be together for a long time,

1041
00:48:56,560 --> 00:48:58,480
Speaker 2: this isn't gonna be the person in five years from now.

1042
00:48:58,920 --> 00:49:00,360
Speaker 1: Again based on career.

1043
00:49:00,840 --> 00:49:04,759
Speaker 2: If children are born depression like, mentally, we become different people.

1044
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:08,840
Speaker 2: And I recently had the conversation with actor Bay, who's

1045
00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:12,560
Speaker 2: my ex, because we had an eight year difference and

1046
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:16,800
Speaker 2: he wanted kids. I know I didn't want kids, But

1047
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 2: the conversation literally turned into by the time you reach thirty,

1048
00:49:21,880 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 2: you're going to have a completely different mindset on who

1049
00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:26,880
Speaker 2: you are, on how life is. And it was interesting

1050
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 2: being able to have that conversation with someone that I

1051
00:49:29,440 --> 00:49:32,160
Speaker 2: was partnered with, but it's not often had. So I

1052
00:49:32,239 --> 00:49:35,680
Speaker 2: do want to know with the two of you, what

1053
00:49:35,960 --> 00:49:39,439
Speaker 2: has been the conversations around the inevitable change that will

1054
00:49:39,440 --> 00:49:43,480
Speaker 2: take place, especially because you said you're still learning your boundaries,

1055
00:49:43,600 --> 00:49:46,360
Speaker 2: you're still seeing what it is. What does that conversation

1056
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:49,279
Speaker 2: look like between you and what conversations should be had

1057
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:50,879
Speaker 2: more in terms of dating.

1058
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:52,719
Speaker 1: I love how you just was like, maybe you got

1059
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,399
Speaker 1: the floor. I love how you. Thank you. Y'all gotta

1060
00:49:55,400 --> 00:49:57,560
Speaker 1: watch on YouTube because it's okay, go ahead.

1061
00:49:57,760 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 4: You know I had a politician teach me this long time.

1062
00:50:01,080 --> 00:50:03,080
Speaker 4: We actually was a politician to consult and I actually

1063
00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 4: came from politics first and everything I know, right, all the.

1064
00:50:07,560 --> 00:50:10,600
Speaker 3: Version team and all of that business. Yeah to chess player,

1065
00:50:10,680 --> 00:50:12,200
Speaker 3: forty chests on the water, all of that.

1066
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:16,200
Speaker 1: Come over and think given you'll never leave. Well, listen,

1067
00:50:16,560 --> 00:50:20,520
Speaker 1: you know my man in the same city you in. No, No,

1068
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:26,120
Speaker 1: I don't offer to come. I don't cook. I burn.

1069
00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:30,280
Speaker 1: I put out nineteen dishes. Everything's given by myself. Nineteen dishes.

1070
00:50:30,600 --> 00:50:32,799
Speaker 1: You know. She had a country booty and that lets

1071
00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:35,120
Speaker 1: me know the food good. Well, my grandfather's from the

1072
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:38,719
Speaker 1: Caroline has this type of ass and this type of food. Yeah,

1073
00:50:39,080 --> 00:50:41,680
Speaker 1: you got a freak and ash I cook. I love you.

1074
00:50:43,920 --> 00:50:47,920
Speaker 1: Look not what's wrong with her? I got ADHD? He

1075
00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:48,960
Speaker 1: calls it four k O.

1076
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:51,279
Speaker 3: You say, babe, because he'd been like, I got I

1077
00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:53,719
Speaker 3: got ADHD, I got O c D. And I was like, yeah,

1078
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:55,160
Speaker 3: she has an led, she got the four.

1079
00:50:56,760 --> 00:50:58,719
Speaker 1: I would say this This is like the smartest I

1080
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:02,680
Speaker 1: was nineteen. I never forget he said to me. In life,

1081
00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:06,399
Speaker 1: there's no such thing as permanent relationships, only permanent agendas. Right.

1082
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:08,239
Speaker 4: And when he was speaking about it to me, he

1083
00:51:08,320 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 4: was talking about it in the context of politics, obviously, right.

1084
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:12,640
Speaker 1: And he was speaking about how the relationships and politics

1085
00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:13,080
Speaker 1: switch up.

1086
00:51:13,120 --> 00:51:16,040
Speaker 4: So don't get too comfortable with anyone because if your

1087
00:51:16,120 --> 00:51:19,239
Speaker 4: agenda shifts, we could be on the same campaign, and

1088
00:51:19,320 --> 00:51:20,960
Speaker 4: then the minute you start working for the app, now

1089
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:21,919
Speaker 4: we're on a different page.

1090
00:51:21,960 --> 00:51:22,920
Speaker 1: The relationship changes.

1091
00:51:23,520 --> 00:51:26,240
Speaker 4: I took that and I applied it to everything everywhere,

1092
00:51:26,480 --> 00:51:29,560
Speaker 4: including my intimate relationships, because I realized, and let me

1093
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:33,920
Speaker 4: be clear, this even applies to marriage because when marriages

1094
00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,279
Speaker 4: and me working with couples for so long, the number

1095
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:39,080
Speaker 4: one reasons that they separate is because they're no longer

1096
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:43,120
Speaker 4: on the same page. The agenda for one doesn't match

1097
00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:45,680
Speaker 4: the agenda of the other, so now the relationship is impacted.

1098
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:49,440
Speaker 4: So for me, it's not about making sure that you

1099
00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:52,160
Speaker 4: can't predict who you're going to be in ten years,

1100
00:51:52,239 --> 00:51:54,239
Speaker 4: but you can stay in touch and check in and

1101
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:56,160
Speaker 4: make sure we're still on the same page. Are we

1102
00:51:56,200 --> 00:51:58,000
Speaker 4: even in the same chapter. Are we in the same book,

1103
00:51:58,320 --> 00:52:01,320
Speaker 4: And when you realize that you're strained too far figuring

1104
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:03,480
Speaker 4: out how to realign your goals, like what are your

1105
00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 4: independent goals? My independent goals and our relationship goals, and

1106
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:09,400
Speaker 4: how do we make sure that that progresses and grows

1107
00:52:09,520 --> 00:52:12,120
Speaker 4: with the relationship and with the different versions of how

1108
00:52:12,200 --> 00:52:15,479
Speaker 4: we're showing exactly right, So when you notice and having

1109
00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:17,840
Speaker 4: awareness of self is so important, I cannot begin to

1110
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 4: say this like emotional intelligence starts with yourself period, Okay,

1111
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:23,040
Speaker 4: And I tell people all the time you have to

1112
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 4: know yourself, be able to regulate, and have to be

1113
00:52:24,719 --> 00:52:26,520
Speaker 4: like hold on, wait, I realize I'm a little off

1114
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:28,959
Speaker 4: or I'm a little this. Some people don't even notice

1115
00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:31,640
Speaker 4: the things within them but have high expectations of others.

1116
00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:34,680
Speaker 4: So for me, before I go at it with him,

1117
00:52:34,760 --> 00:52:36,120
Speaker 4: I ask myself, is this him?

1118
00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:37,239
Speaker 1: Or is this me?

1119
00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:40,000
Speaker 4: Right after I go through those processes, and I could

1120
00:52:40,040 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 4: come back and say, all right, let's talk about this.

1121
00:52:42,080 --> 00:52:44,320
Speaker 4: Where where I'm at right now? Or like, honey, I

1122
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:45,920
Speaker 4: don't know where your head is, but today this is

1123
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:47,600
Speaker 4: where my head is. Cause it's a day to day thing.

1124
00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:49,960
Speaker 4: This is not It could change by the hour. Actually,

1125
00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:51,840
Speaker 4: I could wake up with one agenda. I'm waking up,

1126
00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:53,719
Speaker 4: were going to breakfast, We're doing a Cincinnata. He can

1127
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:55,360
Speaker 4: get up and say I was planning on going to

1128
00:52:55,400 --> 00:52:57,839
Speaker 4: the gym and doing the Cincinnata, And then immediately I'm like, oh,

1129
00:52:58,280 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 4: I was hoping we could go to breakfast, and now

1130
00:53:00,440 --> 00:53:02,720
Speaker 4: we realize we ain't on the same damn page?

1131
00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:04,160
Speaker 1: What are we doing?

1132
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:09,080
Speaker 4: So anytime I feel that we're shifting from pages or whatever,

1133
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:10,320
Speaker 4: ask ourselves, okay, like where are you?

1134
00:53:10,440 --> 00:53:13,600
Speaker 1: Where am I? How do we are now? So as

1135
00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:15,799
Speaker 1: a couple, I would say my advice, ask yourself, where

1136
00:53:15,800 --> 00:53:17,279
Speaker 1: are we now? Where do we want to go? And

1137
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:18,120
Speaker 1: how are we getting there?

1138
00:53:18,560 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 4: Those are the three questions that I would you know,

1139
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:23,160
Speaker 4: and if you could define those repeatedly, no matter what's

1140
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:23,520
Speaker 4: going on.

1141
00:53:23,640 --> 00:53:26,080
Speaker 1: No matter how you're changing, no matter how you're changing,

1142
00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 1: Where am I now? Where do where do I want

1143
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:30,000
Speaker 1: to go? How am I getting there? Where are you now?

1144
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:33,399
Speaker 1: Where you want to go? And then we because individually

1145
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:35,160
Speaker 1: I could be like I want to be at this,

1146
00:53:35,360 --> 00:53:36,680
Speaker 1: and then ten years I could be like, I don't

1147
00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:38,360
Speaker 1: want to do that shit. I'm in a a business

1148
00:53:38,480 --> 00:53:40,880
Speaker 1: development program right now. For one of my companies and

1149
00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:44,560
Speaker 1: all well three of us business partners, we all had

1150
00:53:44,560 --> 00:53:47,680
Speaker 1: a different answer kind of mm hmm. I was like, oh,

1151
00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:51,520
Speaker 1: let's just franchise this. My goal, honestly in life is

1152
00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:54,040
Speaker 1: to like sit the fuck back. Yeah. Last two and

1153
00:53:54,040 --> 00:53:56,960
Speaker 1: a half years a dating my boyfriend. He has a job,

1154
00:53:57,000 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 1: he's a real estate investor. He has all of his

1155
00:53:59,760 --> 00:54:02,840
Speaker 1: free time, and he believes that success my different. My

1156
00:54:03,320 --> 00:54:06,640
Speaker 1: idea of success is so different until seeing the freedom

1157
00:54:07,040 --> 00:54:09,320
Speaker 1: in the time you can change in his mornings and

1158
00:54:09,400 --> 00:54:12,000
Speaker 1: what he could do. How I am like low key

1159
00:54:12,080 --> 00:54:14,640
Speaker 1: a slave to sometimes all of the different things I

1160
00:54:14,680 --> 00:54:19,080
Speaker 1: gotta do. And so figuring out through business, your colleagues,

1161
00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:20,520
Speaker 1: your friendship, where do we want to go? Like that

1162
00:54:20,680 --> 00:54:23,279
Speaker 1: is a question you'll niggas need to ask on a vacation. Yeah,

1163
00:54:23,360 --> 00:54:25,719
Speaker 1: it exists every round because that's why there are certain

1164
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:28,200
Speaker 1: friends I just don't travel with because, bitch, you want

1165
00:54:28,239 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 1: to sleep the whole time. No, it's giving excursions, babe,

1166
00:54:31,160 --> 00:54:34,080
Speaker 1: excel sheet. This is what we're doing then, And you

1167
00:54:34,160 --> 00:54:35,960
Speaker 1: can't travel with people you ain't on to say page

1168
00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:42,239
Speaker 1: because it's nothing worse excursion girl, And you know, girl,

1169
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:44,040
Speaker 1: and you know you just like to lay it and

1170
00:54:44,120 --> 00:54:46,120
Speaker 1: you want to lay on the beach and just sip cocktail.

1171
00:54:46,360 --> 00:54:50,399
Speaker 1: I am cocktail party at night. Let's sleep until brunch, girl.

1172
00:54:51,160 --> 00:54:54,000
Speaker 1: I don't want to do excursions at eight eight, bitch six.

1173
00:54:54,680 --> 00:54:57,439
Speaker 2: Get up, guys, the bus is coming at seven because

1174
00:54:57,480 --> 00:54:58,600
Speaker 2: it's a two hour ride.

1175
00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:01,200
Speaker 1: And you know what cursion it. I think I went

1176
00:55:01,280 --> 00:55:03,239
Speaker 1: on a vacation with excursion girl. I actually was dumb.

1177
00:55:03,600 --> 00:55:05,360
Speaker 1: We went to Italy together ten years ago and I

1178
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:07,520
Speaker 1: remember she had an excursion and me and Vinnie didn't

1179
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:10,080
Speaker 1: make it, and she felt so disrespected because me and

1180
00:55:10,160 --> 00:55:11,680
Speaker 1: Vinnie was like, we going to get club till five

1181
00:55:11,680 --> 00:55:14,759
Speaker 1: a halm. Fuck, We're like paid to the surgeon. Oh

1182
00:55:15,000 --> 00:55:16,839
Speaker 1: sorry girl, we met these people. They actually gonna take

1183
00:55:16,880 --> 00:55:18,239
Speaker 1: us this place to get it. Let's all go together.

1184
00:55:18,800 --> 00:55:21,319
Speaker 1: And the disappointment, Oh yeah. And you know, the thing

1185
00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:23,719
Speaker 1: that you have to realize is the way someone wants

1186
00:55:23,760 --> 00:55:27,000
Speaker 1: to live their life in relationships too, isn't necessarily hurting

1187
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:29,439
Speaker 1: you because they want a different bad Figuring out where

1188
00:55:29,480 --> 00:55:31,239
Speaker 1: you're going to be is so important. It taught me

1189
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:33,160
Speaker 1: a lot. I was maybe twenty two on that trip,

1190
00:55:33,480 --> 00:55:35,480
Speaker 1: and I remember the way it made her feel. She

1191
00:55:35,719 --> 00:55:38,480
Speaker 1: was like fuck y'all didn't consider me at all. We

1192
00:55:38,640 --> 00:55:40,560
Speaker 1: planned this trip. We're in Europe for the first time.

1193
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:42,239
Speaker 1: Bit y'all niggas couldn't have done it.

1194
00:55:42,400 --> 00:55:45,120
Speaker 4: Used the word though, consideration right, Like, I don't think

1195
00:55:45,160 --> 00:55:47,279
Speaker 4: this is is just matters of understanding yourself. But as

1196
00:55:47,320 --> 00:55:49,319
Speaker 4: you guys are growning, you're gonna see things in each other.

1197
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:51,800
Speaker 4: I feel like, and Honey, I think you could speak

1198
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,759
Speaker 4: probably to this way. When I met him, he always said,

1199
00:55:54,760 --> 00:55:55,840
Speaker 4: you know, he just I just want to go to

1200
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:58,880
Speaker 4: work and come home, right, That's why I feel like

1201
00:55:58,960 --> 00:56:00,880
Speaker 4: the answer was. I don't think that's the answer today,

1202
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:02,960
Speaker 4: but it's always how COS changed.

1203
00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:09,320
Speaker 3: No, when I met her, I was a Soca junkie.

1204
00:56:09,640 --> 00:56:10,640
Speaker 3: I used to go to the parties.

1205
00:56:10,680 --> 00:56:12,480
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love Carnival.

1206
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:15,280
Speaker 3: I'm a carnival chaser, fling ways, crazy.

1207
00:56:17,719 --> 00:56:19,520
Speaker 1: Brooklyn, finally giving Brooklyn.

1208
00:56:19,920 --> 00:56:22,880
Speaker 3: And then I met her and I was like, damn,

1209
00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:25,680
Speaker 3: I don't want to give with my Soka yo. I

1210
00:56:25,719 --> 00:56:27,320
Speaker 3: don't want to give with my parties and my carnival

1211
00:56:27,360 --> 00:56:31,080
Speaker 3: because my vacation was carnivals. It wasn't no mouth Eves,

1212
00:56:31,120 --> 00:56:34,239
Speaker 3: it wasn't Jamaica for it was Jamaica. Carnival. Okay, then

1213
00:56:34,400 --> 00:56:36,200
Speaker 3: you know that's what it was. And then when I

1214
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:38,480
Speaker 3: met her now it's like everything started coming to focus

1215
00:56:38,520 --> 00:56:41,080
Speaker 3: and it's like, Okay, we'll try a different way.

1216
00:56:41,200 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 1: You know.

1217
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:43,880
Speaker 3: Now we did a different lifestyle. I meant to Soca

1218
00:56:43,960 --> 00:56:46,080
Speaker 3: parties like that, Like I used to come home with

1219
00:56:46,120 --> 00:56:47,759
Speaker 3: different colors, all of that, you know what I'm saying.

1220
00:56:48,360 --> 00:56:53,080
Speaker 3: So with her now the focus shifted and h Another

1221
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:55,759
Speaker 3: thing that also happened was being with a woman like her.

1222
00:56:56,440 --> 00:57:00,440
Speaker 3: You see her Instagram. It's crazy. Usually before for her,

1223
00:57:00,640 --> 00:57:03,200
Speaker 3: that wasn't my thing. You two out there, I ain't

1224
00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:06,040
Speaker 3: with that, you know what I'm saying. It's like not signing.

1225
00:57:06,040 --> 00:57:07,879
Speaker 3: And then it's like you start to realize, like who

1226
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:09,560
Speaker 3: are you doing this for? Who are you living for?

1227
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:15,840
Speaker 3: You living for yourself or approval of others? Oh no, no, no, no.

1228
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:19,919
Speaker 1: It's funny because I have exs that literally have said

1229
00:57:19,920 --> 00:57:23,240
Speaker 1: the same thing, like I thought you were a lot.

1230
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:26,840
Speaker 2: I normally would not be with a woman who super

1231
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:30,560
Speaker 2: But then when you get to know the person, and

1232
00:57:30,680 --> 00:57:32,600
Speaker 2: this is why I be saying, bro, this is why

1233
00:57:32,600 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 2: the niggas be liking the host, because they at one

1234
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:37,720
Speaker 2: point think about how all the friends are going to perceive,

1235
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:40,000
Speaker 2: how the family's gonna perceive. It's a big deal your

1236
00:57:40,080 --> 00:57:43,360
Speaker 2: online persition because the person oh.

1237
00:57:43,280 --> 00:57:46,200
Speaker 1: Man, and so I love that you just because.

1238
00:57:45,960 --> 00:57:47,800
Speaker 3: It's like, because you deal with a woman and you

1239
00:57:47,920 --> 00:57:51,400
Speaker 3: always judging them. You're like, yo, let's actually shaking some

1240
00:57:51,560 --> 00:57:53,720
Speaker 3: get out of there, can't I can't tell you mom

1241
00:57:53,840 --> 00:57:56,720
Speaker 3: see that? Oh you you're talking about what how much sex?

1242
00:57:56,720 --> 00:57:58,600
Speaker 3: Are you gonna talk about? All the fox son And

1243
00:57:58,680 --> 00:58:04,600
Speaker 3: then it's like you sit down. Yeah, Panama So got

1244
00:58:04,680 --> 00:58:09,160
Speaker 3: to know her and none of that mattered. None of

1245
00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:14,000
Speaker 3: that mattered. And I was like, yo, she no, because

1246
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:14,920
Speaker 3: the conversations we.

1247
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:17,880
Speaker 1: Had and on the first day first first me, yeah,

1248
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:21,000
Speaker 1: I was like yo, time we did.

1249
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:22,919
Speaker 3: But that was that was all on her.

1250
00:58:24,360 --> 00:58:25,320
Speaker 1: Said you wanted it.

1251
00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:26,360
Speaker 3: I'm respectful.

1252
00:58:26,440 --> 00:58:27,200
Speaker 1: You know what's crazy?

1253
00:58:27,280 --> 00:58:29,600
Speaker 2: I do just want to add to this because we

1254
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:34,120
Speaker 2: had a similar conversation in Jamaic based on how she

1255
00:58:34,360 --> 00:58:37,240
Speaker 2: comes across online and all these things and just who

1256
00:58:37,400 --> 00:58:39,760
Speaker 2: she's even friends with and all that, I had a

1257
00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 2: misconception of her and literally just after being around her

1258
00:58:44,320 --> 00:58:44,800
Speaker 2: her energy.

1259
00:58:44,840 --> 00:58:46,520
Speaker 1: This is even before she affirmed me and we had

1260
00:58:46,520 --> 00:58:50,160
Speaker 1: a little you know sure, I even bought them for her.

1261
00:58:50,680 --> 00:58:52,240
Speaker 1: I literally came up to her and I was like,

1262
00:58:52,480 --> 00:58:57,280
Speaker 1: I completely misjudged you. Yes, you are so like But

1263
00:58:57,480 --> 00:58:57,920
Speaker 1: I think.

1264
00:58:57,800 --> 00:58:59,640
Speaker 2: That that's the thing too, right, A lot of us

1265
00:58:59,720 --> 00:59:02,400
Speaker 2: do books by their cover, and when you actually get

1266
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:05,560
Speaker 2: to meet a person, it's energy, it's how they speak,

1267
00:59:05,720 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 2: it's what they can even bring out of you.

1268
00:59:08,560 --> 00:59:12,840
Speaker 3: Are they trustworthy, are they resourceful? What's there? What's their best?

1269
00:59:14,160 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 1: What do they bring out of you?

1270
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:17,920
Speaker 2: And I was gonna say, when we're dating, we're checking boxes,

1271
00:59:17,960 --> 00:59:20,840
Speaker 2: We're looking at the at the cover first, not even

1272
00:59:20,920 --> 00:59:22,920
Speaker 2: wanting to flip through the pages of who this person is.

1273
00:59:22,960 --> 00:59:25,600
Speaker 2: Because if I'm not interested in the cover, if I'm

1274
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:27,920
Speaker 2: not interested in what other people might think of this cover,

1275
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:30,480
Speaker 2: then I don't even take the time to get to

1276
00:59:30,560 --> 00:59:31,800
Speaker 2: know open the book.

1277
00:59:32,120 --> 00:59:38,080
Speaker 1: And to be honest, go ahead, I'm sorry, bab I

1278
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:44,160
Speaker 1: love being in a Crossfire Slapper.

1279
00:59:46,160 --> 00:59:49,280
Speaker 4: It's like when I met him, I met the guy

1280
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:51,560
Speaker 4: who he was, but I asked myself, who is he

1281
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:54,920
Speaker 4: trying to become? Because like we're all at some stage

1282
00:59:54,960 --> 00:59:58,360
Speaker 4: of becoming something else, right, And I don't necessarily I

1283
00:59:58,440 --> 01:00:00,320
Speaker 4: want to get to know the person and everything about

1284
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:02,080
Speaker 4: the past and the history, but those days are never

1285
01:00:02,160 --> 01:00:04,320
Speaker 4: coming back. Those are important to know, so I could

1286
01:00:04,320 --> 01:00:06,640
Speaker 4: be aware of any potential traumas and things you might

1287
01:00:06,680 --> 01:00:08,000
Speaker 4: have been through and how they might have shaped your

1288
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:09,040
Speaker 4: mindset and your beliefs.

1289
01:00:09,160 --> 01:00:09,400
Speaker 1: Cool.

1290
01:00:09,960 --> 01:00:12,000
Speaker 4: But when I met him and he said that to

1291
01:00:12,120 --> 01:00:13,600
Speaker 4: me and then I would talk to him, he had

1292
01:00:13,640 --> 01:00:16,320
Speaker 4: this personality. He was funny, he was charismatic, he was

1293
01:00:16,360 --> 01:00:17,840
Speaker 4: this and that, and I might just go home and

1294
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 4: go to work and come home. It didn't feel right,

1295
01:00:20,280 --> 01:00:22,640
Speaker 4: but I couldn't tell him that I needed him to

1296
01:00:22,760 --> 01:00:26,000
Speaker 4: arrive there. So for me, my role felt like I

1297
01:00:26,160 --> 01:00:28,200
Speaker 4: just want to introduce you to things, and if you

1298
01:00:28,360 --> 01:00:29,000
Speaker 4: like it, you like it.

1299
01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:29,959
Speaker 1: If you don't, you don't.

1300
01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:34,080
Speaker 4: And I think that discovery has kept us open right

1301
01:00:34,280 --> 01:00:36,480
Speaker 4: to possibilities for what things can look like. Yes, if

1302
01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:38,400
Speaker 4: a person see me and he seen me shaking assets

1303
01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:40,720
Speaker 4: in that, they might get the same misconceptions.

1304
01:00:41,840 --> 01:00:43,320
Speaker 1: They might get the same misconceptions.

1305
01:00:43,520 --> 01:00:48,600
Speaker 4: Cool, and honestly, I've used that in business to my

1306
01:00:48,640 --> 01:00:51,360
Speaker 4: advantage because what that makes me is someone you're gonna

1307
01:00:51,360 --> 01:00:51,640
Speaker 4: sleep on.

1308
01:00:52,120 --> 01:00:54,400
Speaker 1: Right. You're gonna think that I'm not a threat.

1309
01:00:54,440 --> 01:00:56,000
Speaker 4: You're gonna think that I'm not a person who can

1310
01:00:56,080 --> 01:00:57,560
Speaker 4: do this and do that, and I'm gonna surprise you

1311
01:00:58,040 --> 01:01:01,200
Speaker 4: and I'm okay with that, all right, Yeah, I love

1312
01:01:01,240 --> 01:01:03,640
Speaker 4: that all So to me, it was like I would

1313
01:01:03,680 --> 01:01:05,600
Speaker 4: pull people in with those things, but then like, oh,

1314
01:01:05,800 --> 01:01:07,560
Speaker 4: let me teach you this thing. Oh but let me

1315
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:09,320
Speaker 4: tell you this thing. Oh well, let me give you

1316
01:01:09,400 --> 01:01:11,440
Speaker 4: this thing. And then before you know it, you're in

1317
01:01:11,560 --> 01:01:15,360
Speaker 4: a conflict because I'm everything that your parents told you

1318
01:01:16,040 --> 01:01:16,760
Speaker 4: you shouldn't want.

1319
01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:21,840
Speaker 1: Yes you are and not yes you are. But I'm

1320
01:01:23,440 --> 01:01:25,400
Speaker 1: has she changed the minds of your parents?

1321
01:01:25,920 --> 01:01:29,040
Speaker 3: No, they they when they met her. It was my

1322
01:01:29,160 --> 01:01:32,560
Speaker 3: birthday and I couldn't walk that great. I struggled up

1323
01:01:32,560 --> 01:01:32,880
Speaker 3: the steps.

1324
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:34,680
Speaker 4: So it was three o'clock in the morning. We should

1325
01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:36,800
Speaker 4: say that that's when you met the pair. At three

1326
01:01:36,840 --> 01:01:38,040
Speaker 4: o'clock in the met an accident.

1327
01:01:38,240 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, it wasn't. It was like, this is what happened.

1328
01:01:40,960 --> 01:01:42,800
Speaker 1: First of all, I broke him out of rehab, right

1329
01:01:44,560 --> 01:01:46,880
Speaker 1: jail break. I broke him out of rehab. He was

1330
01:01:46,920 --> 01:01:48,040
Speaker 1: in rehab and.

1331
01:01:48,120 --> 01:01:50,360
Speaker 4: They told me that technically he could leave for twenty

1332
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:52,200
Speaker 4: four hours, and I was like, well after twelve, we.

1333
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:52,800
Speaker 1: Had a new day.

1334
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:55,560
Speaker 4: So after I argue with the people there, which those

1335
01:01:55,600 --> 01:01:57,200
Speaker 4: are my people. Let me get shouts to them. Now

1336
01:01:57,400 --> 01:01:59,040
Speaker 4: we all love each other now. But in the beginning,

1337
01:01:59,080 --> 01:02:01,520
Speaker 4: I was like, I'm out, were going somewhere. It's his birthday.

1338
01:02:01,520 --> 01:02:02,320
Speaker 4: We're not staying here.

1339
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:05,200
Speaker 1: So I you know, packed the wheelchair in the back

1340
01:02:05,240 --> 01:02:07,520
Speaker 1: of the the back of the car. He in there.

1341
01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:10,439
Speaker 4: But it was his birthday and his parents hadn't seen

1342
01:02:10,480 --> 01:02:13,080
Speaker 4: him since like the day of accident, really right, So

1343
01:02:13,560 --> 01:02:14,320
Speaker 4: I'm like, let's go.

1344
01:02:14,440 --> 01:02:16,480
Speaker 1: I'm taking your mom and dad or whatever cases. The

1345
01:02:16,480 --> 01:02:17,959
Speaker 1: ain't gonna care to the two o'clock in the morning.

1346
01:02:18,000 --> 01:02:20,600
Speaker 1: They're seeing their son and he's on his feet, right

1347
01:02:20,760 --> 01:02:22,160
Speaker 1: when the last time they saw you, you were in

1348
01:02:22,200 --> 01:02:25,320
Speaker 1: a bed like that, right, So they get in there.

1349
01:02:25,360 --> 01:02:27,080
Speaker 4: But the only thing that drove me crazy about it

1350
01:02:27,200 --> 01:02:28,760
Speaker 4: is that I was wearing this like tank top that

1351
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:31,840
Speaker 4: says exercise and like basketball his basketball short.

1352
01:02:34,400 --> 01:02:37,280
Speaker 1: I promised you nothing about this name. Your hair was

1353
01:02:37,320 --> 01:02:40,120
Speaker 1: long covering it. It was it was not I had on.

1354
01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:43,760
Speaker 1: I literally had on his basketball shorts looking like y'all

1355
01:02:43,920 --> 01:02:46,760
Speaker 1: just fun. I swear to God. I swear to God.

1356
01:02:47,360 --> 01:02:49,480
Speaker 1: So now I'm over here, like I'm walking in the house.

1357
01:02:49,520 --> 01:02:51,680
Speaker 4: I'm coming, We're coming in, and you know, sitting down

1358
01:02:51,720 --> 01:02:53,600
Speaker 4: and I'm just like casually trying to keep myself this

1359
01:02:53,680 --> 01:02:55,720
Speaker 4: way so you can't be reading a tank top because

1360
01:02:55,720 --> 01:03:00,800
Speaker 4: the Caribbean parents been talking about you know, yeah, very conservative.

1361
01:03:01,160 --> 01:03:02,959
Speaker 4: I don't feel like that day. And I don't know, baby,

1362
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:05,240
Speaker 4: if you agree, I don't. I don't think his parents

1363
01:03:05,320 --> 01:03:08,560
Speaker 4: cared about anything else right then.

1364
01:03:09,400 --> 01:03:10,560
Speaker 1: That that's what I like.

1365
01:03:10,680 --> 01:03:13,880
Speaker 4: His mom and dad was watching everything, his every movement

1366
01:03:13,880 --> 01:03:15,720
Speaker 4: and all this kind of stuff, and like I'm like

1367
01:03:15,920 --> 01:03:18,240
Speaker 4: carrying his ass with step damn there and whatever, and

1368
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:19,720
Speaker 4: I don't think they saw anything else.

1369
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:23,640
Speaker 1: But I mean, you know your parents better. But that

1370
01:03:23,880 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 1: day we were talking.

1371
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,520
Speaker 4: It was just like how's your progress and this and that,

1372
01:03:27,640 --> 01:03:29,200
Speaker 4: and he's like, oh, Mom, you know, she's been taking

1373
01:03:29,280 --> 01:03:31,600
Speaker 4: care of me and the Cincinnati So like, I feel

1374
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:33,360
Speaker 4: like we met in an environment that I was like

1375
01:03:33,480 --> 01:03:35,400
Speaker 4: Jesus Christ, I met his parents at three o'clock in

1376
01:03:35,440 --> 01:03:35,840
Speaker 4: the morning.

1377
01:03:36,040 --> 01:03:37,560
Speaker 1: Everything about our life is crazy.

1378
01:03:38,120 --> 01:03:40,840
Speaker 3: That was like the best first impression because it was honest,

1379
01:03:40,920 --> 01:03:43,080
Speaker 3: it was genuine, it was spontaneous, it was real, it

1380
01:03:43,200 --> 01:03:46,160
Speaker 3: wasn't scripted, and he was just supposed to meet them.

1381
01:03:46,200 --> 01:03:47,600
Speaker 3: You supposed to help me up the stairs and open

1382
01:03:47,640 --> 01:03:50,880
Speaker 3: the door, like, but then I couldn't stand enough. She

1383
01:03:50,960 --> 01:03:53,080
Speaker 3: had helped me up the stairs because up the stairs

1384
01:03:53,120 --> 01:03:55,480
Speaker 3: was a problem, these little four steps messing me up.

1385
01:03:55,640 --> 01:03:58,080
Speaker 3: So she helped me up the steps. And then she's

1386
01:03:58,120 --> 01:03:59,880
Speaker 3: just like, oh, I can't get.

1387
01:03:59,800 --> 01:04:02,440
Speaker 1: Back in the car. Come inside, come inside.

1388
01:04:02,840 --> 01:04:05,640
Speaker 3: And then she came inside and next she knows she's dead.

1389
01:04:05,720 --> 01:04:07,920
Speaker 3: Trying to hold her, you know, trying to hide the shirt,

1390
01:04:08,040 --> 01:04:11,080
Speaker 3: and Pops was watching, and I took it in edible on,

1391
01:04:12,720 --> 01:04:15,360
Speaker 3: so she was. I was not prepared to meet his parents.

1392
01:04:15,440 --> 01:04:17,480
Speaker 3: The edible hadn't kicked in yet. It kicked in in

1393
01:04:17,560 --> 01:04:19,920
Speaker 3: his parents' living room. But she knows how I am.

1394
01:04:20,120 --> 01:04:23,240
Speaker 3: She knows I'm very you know, drop her shoulder, charged through,

1395
01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:25,640
Speaker 3: tight and tighten with it. You know what I'm saying.

1396
01:04:26,040 --> 01:04:26,560
Speaker 3: I don't care.

1397
01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:28,920
Speaker 1: He's just as proud as that of his little crowd.

1398
01:04:29,080 --> 01:04:34,160
Speaker 1: High a bit poorly dressed girl, hold in my hand,

1399
01:04:34,440 --> 01:04:36,120
Speaker 1: and he's like, this is the girl, mom.

1400
01:04:36,080 --> 01:04:36,360
Speaker 3: This is.

1401
01:04:38,040 --> 01:04:39,840
Speaker 1: I was like, behave is kicking him real strong. We

1402
01:04:39,880 --> 01:04:42,880
Speaker 1: gotta go, like we got to get up town strong.

1403
01:04:42,920 --> 01:04:44,720
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry everybody. I don't want to have a

1404
01:04:44,760 --> 01:04:48,440
Speaker 1: white crowd situation. Attle go baby, go go well, I

1405
01:04:48,840 --> 01:04:51,200
Speaker 1: was actually about to wrap up this episode. We didn't

1406
01:04:51,200 --> 01:04:53,720
Speaker 1: even go to the outline. She's we didn't even do

1407
01:04:53,960 --> 01:04:59,600
Speaker 1: the outline. But this was this was so good thing.

1408
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:02,280
Speaker 1: I am so glad that I met y'all. Y'all are

1409
01:05:03,000 --> 01:05:06,560
Speaker 1: this is I feel like the example is like black love.

1410
01:05:06,880 --> 01:05:09,360
Speaker 1: I love the little shit y'll be seeing. This is

1411
01:05:09,440 --> 01:05:12,000
Speaker 1: black love. Right. We left them with so many stories,

1412
01:05:12,080 --> 01:05:13,880
Speaker 1: Cliff Tanger, we might have to give that back to

1413
01:05:14,000 --> 01:05:16,520
Speaker 1: the later right, Listen, they're like, wait, finish to think

1414
01:05:16,520 --> 01:05:18,520
Speaker 1: about the sub wait, come back to them. Let me

1415
01:05:18,640 --> 01:05:21,640
Speaker 1: tell y'all if you want to hear more of our stories.

1416
01:05:21,720 --> 01:05:26,360
Speaker 1: Though we shared our entire pretty much our entire I

1417
01:05:26,400 --> 01:05:28,400
Speaker 1: think I left out one or two stories. Yeah, but

1418
01:05:28,640 --> 01:05:33,160
Speaker 1: we did two episodes of stories from Hedonism. Yeah, you

1419
01:05:33,240 --> 01:05:34,120
Speaker 1: know what's crazy though.

1420
01:05:34,200 --> 01:05:36,680
Speaker 2: The only story I don't think we fully got was

1421
01:05:36,680 --> 01:05:38,320
Speaker 2: the last night I saw y'all in the dungeon.

1422
01:05:38,920 --> 01:05:41,600
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that was. We didn't get to that. We

1423
01:05:41,680 --> 01:05:43,480
Speaker 1: didn't even get to that. We didn't get We gotta

1424
01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:45,800
Speaker 1: just we'll set up. We're gonna have to get together.

1425
01:05:46,200 --> 01:05:48,919
Speaker 2: We are are, We're gonna get the car. Yeah, amer

1426
01:05:49,040 --> 01:05:53,960
Speaker 2: can people listen to you? Support you hire you all.

1427
01:05:53,880 --> 01:05:56,440
Speaker 1: Of that well, So we have a page together.

1428
01:05:56,680 --> 01:05:58,960
Speaker 4: One one I'll say that is soft and the Strong

1429
01:05:59,320 --> 01:06:02,200
Speaker 4: I love on Instagram and we just kind of started

1430
01:06:02,240 --> 01:06:04,880
Speaker 4: that recently, so we're putting up more couples focused content

1431
01:06:05,040 --> 01:06:08,040
Speaker 4: and things like that. But outside of that, if you

1432
01:06:08,120 --> 01:06:10,880
Speaker 4: search your sexologists bestie cash you'll find me or your

1433
01:06:10,880 --> 01:06:11,720
Speaker 4: sexalogist bestie.

1434
01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:15,440
Speaker 1: I'm googleable. You worked hard sexologist bestie.

1435
01:06:15,080 --> 01:06:18,080
Speaker 4: Yep, your sexalogiest bestie is my my brand entity for

1436
01:06:18,160 --> 01:06:20,720
Speaker 4: that side of the work. But you can find me

1437
01:06:20,760 --> 01:06:23,040
Speaker 4: at Casha Johnson dot com. That's k A s h

1438
01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:27,400
Speaker 4: A like cash check Johnson dot com and that leads

1439
01:06:27,440 --> 01:06:33,960
Speaker 4: you to all ropes. Yeah, but that's the best way

1440
01:06:34,000 --> 01:06:35,600
Speaker 4: to connect with me because I have so many different

1441
01:06:35,720 --> 01:06:38,160
Speaker 4: things going on and I think head over, figure out

1442
01:06:38,160 --> 01:06:40,480
Speaker 4: what's there, and doll in to whatever feels like it

1443
01:06:40,560 --> 01:06:41,000
Speaker 4: connects to you.

1444
01:06:41,560 --> 01:06:44,520
Speaker 1: I love it, I love I love it, and Daddy.

1445
01:06:44,760 --> 01:06:49,120
Speaker 3: I go by Big Black Supervillain or Sir Panama if

1446
01:06:49,160 --> 01:06:52,000
Speaker 3: you're nasty, but Big Black Supervillain is our main name.

1447
01:06:53,160 --> 01:06:56,240
Speaker 3: It's a persona, it's a thing that a runway and

1448
01:06:56,320 --> 01:06:57,520
Speaker 3: it's been me ever since.

1449
01:06:58,920 --> 01:07:01,480
Speaker 2: I mean, in your dress like a super villain yes,

1450
01:07:01,880 --> 01:07:04,919
Speaker 2: yes you are yes, but guys, thank y'all so much.

1451
01:07:05,320 --> 01:07:08,040
Speaker 1: Hopefully this gave horrible decisions bitch. I think y'all have

1452
01:07:08,040 --> 01:07:13,640
Speaker 1: been missing a little bit and we gave it today. Y'all.

1453
01:07:13,680 --> 01:07:16,720
Speaker 2: Make sure that you're safe, that you dress up, that

1454
01:07:16,840 --> 01:07:22,440
Speaker 2: you watch your surroundings this holiday weekend have fun. But also,

1455
01:07:22,600 --> 01:07:24,480
Speaker 2: if you haven't yet, make sure you purchase our book

1456
01:07:24,560 --> 01:07:28,160
Speaker 2: No Holds Barred Doing Manifesto, Sexual Exploration and Power. And again,

1457
01:07:28,560 --> 01:07:31,360
Speaker 2: if you want to hear all the stories from our

1458
01:07:31,440 --> 01:07:34,480
Speaker 2: trip at Hedonism with Chacko Bliss, make sure you join

1459
01:07:34,560 --> 01:07:38,480
Speaker 2: us on Patreon. That's patreon dot com. Backslash Horrible Decisions.

1460
01:07:38,680 --> 01:07:42,800
Speaker 2: If y'all thought this was nasty, boy, was that even nastier?

1461
01:07:42,920 --> 01:07:46,479
Speaker 2: And she gives a whole demonstration on all the things.

1462
01:07:48,640 --> 01:07:51,160
Speaker 1: I'm just doing the motion, y'all know what it is.

1463
01:07:51,800 --> 01:07:54,320
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much. This has been another episode

1464
01:07:54,440 --> 01:08:03,880
Speaker 1: of Decisions. Decisions. Is the t condu the doing between

1465
01:08:03,960 --> 01:08:04,400
Speaker 1: the people