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Speaker 1: your favorite store Rooking Jewels. Second date Update. The guy

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Speaker 1: on the phone for a second date update today thinks

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Speaker 1: that his date was ruined by pirates. What. Yeah, this

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Speaker 1: is the most awesome start of any second date we've

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Speaker 1: ever had. You know, it doesn't happen often, but every

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Speaker 1: once in a while, pirates will come in and just

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Speaker 1: ruin a date. Those guys are jerks. They're always doing

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Speaker 1: things like that. His name is Paul, not the pirate,

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Speaker 1: the guy that's day. No, it wasn't some pirate name

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Speaker 1: Paul that showed up and his emails said that pirates

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Speaker 1: came up and he thinks that's what ruined his date. Paul,

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Speaker 1: what's up? Hey? How are you? Is this like something

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Speaker 1: like figure of speech? We don't understand. Um, it's right

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Speaker 1: in between, right in between. Okay, So before we find

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Speaker 1: out how pirates ruined your date, who's the girl that

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Speaker 1: you went out with what's her name, Vicky? Vicky? And

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Speaker 1: where did you meet Vicky on the high season? No?

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Speaker 1: I met her on this new app, Bumble. Have you

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Speaker 1: get heard of it? Yeah, that's not new. It's been

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Speaker 1: around for a little bit. It's kind of like the

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Speaker 1: thing right now though, really Yeah? Yeah, oh well I

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Speaker 1: thought it was like the cool new thing. It is cool.

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Speaker 1: I mean I think it is. It kind of, but

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Speaker 1: it's been around for a while. It's the one where

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Speaker 1: the ladies choose the dudes. Okay, yeah, so you guys

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Speaker 1: have heard of it? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, right, so your

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Speaker 1: friends told you to try Bumble and that's where you

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Speaker 1: met her. Yeah, so we matched on Bumble, chatted a

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Speaker 1: little bit and thought I would take her out for

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Speaker 1: some drink since she said he get Now, was this

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Speaker 1: your first ever like online dating experience. No, I've tried

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Speaker 1: tender before one on a couple unsuccessful dates. And I

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Speaker 1: tried Craig Bliss one time, and that definitely was I

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Speaker 1: don't know why you thought that would work. That's where

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Speaker 1: you could probably find a real life pirate, the pirates.

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Speaker 1: What does that mean? You said? Do you think your

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Speaker 1: date was ruined by pirates? O? Game. So here's the thing.

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Speaker 1: I took her out to get some drinks, and I

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Speaker 1: know that for me, it takes about two to three

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Speaker 1: drinks to really boosten up and get good at conversation. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So first drinks things were still kind of stiff. Second drink,

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Speaker 1: things already to get better. And then by the third drink,

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Speaker 1: I think I may have gone too far. Why because

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Speaker 1: for some reason pirates came up and conversation, or they

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Speaker 1: sensored up to your table in conversation, okay, okay, And

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Speaker 1: I thought it would be funny to talk in a

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Speaker 1: pirate voice like our Maki the Seven Seas be, you know,

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Speaker 1: stuff like that. Well, it's hard, okay, Paul the your fence,

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Speaker 1: it's hard not to do that. When anyone brings up pirates,

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Speaker 1: we all want to say something about booty and walk

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Speaker 1: in the plank and the whole day. It's true. Why

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Speaker 1: do you think that ruined your date? Well, it was

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Speaker 1: fine at first, but I got stuck in the pirate

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Speaker 1: voice or not exaggerating five to ten straight minutes a

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Speaker 1: condition where you literally just got stuck and couldn't get

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Speaker 1: out of it. Yeah, it really felt like a medical condition.

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Speaker 1: Could you tell that she was like, okay, joke over

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Speaker 1: at a certain point, or did you just keep going

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Speaker 1: and you weren't aware of that? I definitely just kept going.

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Speaker 1: And at this point she was barely even responding. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I'm sure she was just trying to think of ways

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Speaker 1: to escape the situation. God, you needn't help escaping the

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Speaker 1: pirate voice. More like it. You should have slipped her

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Speaker 1: a note that said help me. I've been captured. If

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Speaker 1: I could have, I would have. But that was that

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Speaker 1: was the problem. Was I just kept going. Yeah, So

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Speaker 1: how quickly did your date end after you got a

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Speaker 1: case of the pirates. Well, eventually I was able to

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Speaker 1: get back to my normal voice. I drug the whole

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Speaker 1: pirate thing, and since really apologized for going on for

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Speaker 1: too long. She you know, accepted my apology and we

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Speaker 1: moved on and had a pretty good conversation after that.

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Speaker 1: She didn't bolt right after the pirates, didn't bolt, maybe

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Speaker 1: just out of courtesy, so it wouldn't be very obvious.

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Speaker 1: So how did everything end with her? Then? So? I

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Speaker 1: things were wrapping up and she said she needed to

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Speaker 1: get out of year, and she said that her friend

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Speaker 1: was coming to pick her up. So I waited, and

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Speaker 1: I didn't want to, you know, try to kiss her

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Speaker 1: in front of her friend and after everything. So that's

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Speaker 1: not a pirate move. Im pirateate have grabbed her right

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Speaker 1: in front of her friend and made out with her. Well,

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Speaker 1: the thing is, I'm not actually a pirate. If I was,

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Speaker 1: I probably would have definately gotten a second date. It

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Speaker 1: all makes more sense now that he established that, and

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Speaker 1: you've heard nothing back from her at all. No, okay,

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Speaker 1: well we'll play a song. Come back, call her and

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Speaker 1: get your second date update. If you ask for your

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Speaker 1: second date update in a pirate voice, Oh gosh, is

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Speaker 1: here Paul? Give me a second date? All right? Well, perfect,

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Speaker 1: we'll do it right after this fucking Jubilan morning. I

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Speaker 1: told myself I wouldn't do it, but fortunately I can't

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Speaker 1: help it. Welcome back to your second date update where

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Speaker 1: pirate Paul is on the phone. Will he be getting

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Speaker 1: a date or walking the plank? All right, got it

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Speaker 1: out of my system. You know that everyone in the

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Speaker 1: car right now just do the same argument. I know,

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Speaker 1: it's so hard not to. Right in the middle of

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Speaker 1: a second date update and Paul is on the phone.

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Speaker 1: The reason for the pirate theme is because Paul thinks

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Speaker 1: that his pirate impersonation killed his chances at a second date.

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Speaker 1: He went out with a girl named Vicky who he

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Speaker 1: met on Bumble. They were hanging out and then they

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Speaker 1: got on the subject of pirates, and then he started

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Speaker 1: talking like a pirate and then, to use his words,

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Speaker 1: got stuck in pirate mode and couldn't stop and went

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Speaker 1: on for like ten minutes. And he feels like that

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Speaker 1: joke just went way too far and she might think

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Speaker 1: he's kind of a weirdo. You're ready to go, Paul,

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Speaker 1: ready to call her? Yeah? Absolutely, let's go. And you're

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Speaker 1: sure you can stay away from pirate Paul, Right, I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to stay out of the pirate voice. Okay, okay, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: Well if I enter a pirate mode, who knows what

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Speaker 1: will happen. Yeah, You're not in control at that point.

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Speaker 1: All right. I'm gonna dial her phone number right now

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Speaker 1: and see if we can figure out why she's not

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Speaker 1: calling you back. Okay, okay, okay, Hello, can I speak

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Speaker 1: to Vicky please? This is Vicky. Hey, Vicky, how are you.

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Speaker 1: This is Jewil from brook and Jewil in the morning. Um, Hi, Hi,

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Speaker 1: why are you calling me? I just want to ask

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Speaker 1: you a couple of questions about some stuff. Hey, Vicky,

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Speaker 1: how did you get my number? Oh? You know from someone? Okay,

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Speaker 1: what is going on? This is Jewil from Brook and

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Speaker 1: Jewel in the Morning. It's a radio show. I know

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Speaker 1: it's a radio show. But why are you calling me?

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Speaker 1: You recently went out with a dude who liked you

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Speaker 1: a lot, and now you're not calling it back. So

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Speaker 1: he sent us an email asking if we could get

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Speaker 1: you on the phone to figure out what happened. His

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Speaker 1: name's Paul. Oh okay, Oh you remember Paul. I remember Paul. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: he told us. He told us about your day and

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Speaker 1: how he kept talking in pirate He thinks that might

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Speaker 1: have turned you off. Yeah, it was really weird. He

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Speaker 1: was really normal at first, and then like I don't

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Speaker 1: even remember how we got into the conversation about pirates,

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Speaker 1: but we started talking about pirates, and then he wouldn't

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Speaker 1: stop talking in a pirate voice, and it went on

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Speaker 1: for what seems like forever. Yeah, he didn't tell us that,

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Speaker 1: and he knows that he kind of screwed up by

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Speaker 1: doing that. Yeah. I mean, he kept making these jokes.

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Speaker 1: He kept saying like something something poop deck like he

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Speaker 1: just kept saying pop. I don't know. I guess he

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Speaker 1: thought it was funny, but it was just really weird,

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Speaker 1: Like it reached the point where it wasn't funny, and

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Speaker 1: then he kept going for a really long time after that.

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Speaker 1: So you, I mean after Pirate Voice, you weren't attracted

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Speaker 1: to him anymore. I mean it was cute at first,

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Speaker 1: and then it just got really weird. And then he

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Speaker 1: started talking to me about other dates he was going

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Speaker 1: to go on later in the week, Like like he

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Speaker 1: switched up to like we were friends or something. Hold on,

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Speaker 1: rewind us a little bit. You said he was talking

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Speaker 1: about dates he was going on later in the week. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so like we matched on Bumble and he was talking

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Speaker 1: about other people that he matched with, and then was

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Speaker 1: just like casually bringing up like, oh yeah, on Wednesday,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go out with this person, Like should I

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Speaker 1: bring her flowers? Like what would you suggest that I do?

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Speaker 1: That is I mean, was it a weird attempt to

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Speaker 1: bond with you over both doing the dating app. I'm

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Speaker 1: just trying to figure out why someone would ever bring

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Speaker 1: that up. Yeah, I don't know. I mean it was

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Speaker 1: really weird and like I didn't really know him. So

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Speaker 1: it's not like I was getting like crazy jealous or

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Speaker 1: something because this was our first date. But that just

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Speaker 1: seems like such a weird, kind of really rude thing

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Speaker 1: to do if you're on a date with stuff, right, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that should usually be common sense. But we're talking, you're

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Speaker 1: also going to go and talk like a pirate for

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Speaker 1: ten minutes. You might not understand that's not exactly what

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Speaker 1: you do on a date. A good point. That's so

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Speaker 1: weird though. I mean, if someone did that to me,

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Speaker 1: I would read it as they weren't interested in me

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Speaker 1: and that they were trying to friend zone me, right,

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Speaker 1: which had he not done the pirate voice, maybe I

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Speaker 1: would have immediately gone to that assumption. But I think

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Speaker 1: I just felt like he didn't understand how dates are

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Speaker 1: supposed to go. I think you are at how did

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Speaker 1: you react, by the way, when he was telling you

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Speaker 1: about these other girls? So I told him my opinion

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Speaker 1: on whatever he brought up, like, yeah, sure, I'm sure

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Speaker 1: she'd like it if you've brought her daisies. I don't

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Speaker 1: know you gave him solidating device, Yeah I guess sure. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean now I'm like I probably should have just

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Speaker 1: told him off. Well, you know you can tell him

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Speaker 1: off because he's on the other line listening and wants

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Speaker 1: to talk to you. He's what, he's listening to this

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Speaker 1: conversation and wants to talk to you. Hey, Vicky, Oh

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Speaker 1: my god? What what is wrong with you? Why would

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Speaker 1: you do this? I just wanted to see what's up

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Speaker 1: and thought that just be a funny way to get

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Speaker 1: your attention. Funny way. Did you think that talking about

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Speaker 1: other girls on our date was gonna get my attention? Oh?

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Speaker 1: We've only been on one date, so I wanted it

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Speaker 1: a problem if I had brought up other girls? What?

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Speaker 1: No home, no matter, what doesn't matter how long you're

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Speaker 1: still going on a date with somebody, you don't bring

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Speaker 1: up other dates. Usually, I don't know. It kind of

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Speaker 1: sounds like she's a little bit jealous. Why are your dude,

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Speaker 1: it's all like weird exclusive or anything. I'm allowed to

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Speaker 1: see other people and teach you be okay with that? Yeah, Paul,

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Speaker 1: that's fine. That's what dating is. But I feel like

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Speaker 1: it's kind of an unsaid rule that you don't ask

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Speaker 1: that other people you're dating about advice for other dates. Right,

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Speaker 1: She's a question you don't need to be like scared

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Speaker 1: of a question. I'm not scared of a question. I

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Speaker 1: don't freak your care. If you're dating other people, that's fine,

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Speaker 1: But I don't want to give you advice about it

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Speaker 1: like that just makes me feel like I'm completely not important.

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Speaker 1: I don't know you know your tone and everything. You

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Speaker 1: sound a little bit jealous, Paul. I'm not jealous. I

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Speaker 1: just think it's breaking insane that you would bring up

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Speaker 1: other girls roles while you're on a date with me, Like,

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Speaker 1: why are you asking me for dating advice? Don't you

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Speaker 1: have friends to help you with that? Like? What who

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Speaker 1: would be a better person to ask for dating advice

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Speaker 1: than the person that I'm currently on a date with?

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Speaker 1: In a weird way, Paul, that's a good point, But no,

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Speaker 1: you're not supposed to do that. No, you're not supposed

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Speaker 1: to do that. Why else would you care? Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I don't care, Paul. I just don't want to go

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Speaker 1: on any more dates with you, because this is not

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Speaker 1: how I want to date somebody. I don't want to

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Speaker 1: give you advice on other people. Well, maybe if you

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Speaker 1: continue dating me, you'd be the only person I went

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Speaker 1: on dates with, and that'd be pretty cool. Really, out

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Speaker 1: of all the girls, I like you the best. Oh.

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Speaker 1: I am so flattered. Thank you, it's so really special.

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Speaker 1: You're welcome. Oh my god. Honestly, Paul, just go have

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Speaker 1: fun with the billion other dates you have this week.

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Speaker 1: I really don't care, not a billion three. Hey, Vicky,

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Speaker 1: would you like to be date number four this week

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Speaker 1: and go out with Paul one more time? We'll pay

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Speaker 1: for it. No, one thousand percent. No, I don't want

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Speaker 1: to date with myself. Yes, it's really shocking. Come on, Vicky,

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Speaker 1: we had so much fun, maybe the first three minutes,

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Speaker 1: and not even to mention the freaking talking like a

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Speaker 1: pirate for ten minutes, like you were. I couldn't help myself.

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Speaker 1: He was stuck in pirate, Vicky, come on, one more date? No?

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Speaker 1: Are you sure you will go out with me? Yes? No, Paul,

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna go out with you. Maybe to be

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Speaker 1: weird in the morning. Text in at seven eight, five

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Speaker 1: nine two, it says it sounds like the guy in

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Speaker 1: today's second date update has never been out with anybody

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Speaker 1: in his life, And yeah, it did kind of sound

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Speaker 1: like that. If you missed today's second date update, this

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Speaker 1: dude named Paul wanted to call Vicky. He wasn't sure

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Speaker 1: why he wasn't getting a call back. He thought maybe

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Speaker 1: it was because he slipped into pirate and couldn't get

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Speaker 1: out of it. Apparently during their first date he wouldn't

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Speaker 1: stop talking like a pirate and joking around like a

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Speaker 1: pirate the whole time, and we're like, dude, why didn't

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Speaker 1: you just drop it after the first couple times, Like,

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Speaker 1: I couldn't get out of it. I was stuck in pirate.

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Speaker 1: I've never been stuck in pirate before, but he was.

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Speaker 1: And when we got her on the phone and found

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Speaker 1: out the reason it's one is because of the pirate,

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Speaker 1: for sure, that was weird to her. But then also

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Speaker 1: he kept talking about all these other dates that he

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Speaker 1: was going on, clearly trying to be like, you know,

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Speaker 1: I got a lot of options, and that's not very

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Speaker 1: impressive to go out on a date with somebody and

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Speaker 1: then talk about all the other dates you have lined up.

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Speaker 1: Wanted advice from her, Yeah, but it is kind of

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Speaker 1: sad that he can get lots of date options and

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Speaker 1: there's people, normal people who can't even find one is

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Speaker 1: going on in this world, say he's out on the day,

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Speaker 1: being like, oh, I got this hot date line up

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Speaker 1: for Thursday. She says that she likes to hike and stuff.

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Speaker 1: Should I go hiking? What do you think I should

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Speaker 1: do with her? Just asking advice? Text in at seven

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Speaker 1: eight five nights, he says, I just hated the guy

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Speaker 1: because he had the worst pirate voice ever it did.

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Speaker 1: I agree. It wasn't convincing or good at all. That's fun.

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Speaker 1: That's a fun part about accents and doing impressions. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you say that because you're not good at those. You

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Speaker 1: don't have to be good to do an impression. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you can. Just it's fun. So they decided to not

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Speaker 1: go out again. But I'm guessing for Paul it's okay

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Speaker 1: because apparently he's got options just lined up. He's got

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Speaker 1: he's got dates for days. That's what it sounds like

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Speaker 1: to me. I honestly think though, that he was making

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Speaker 1: up these other dates like some guys try to impress

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Speaker 1: girls and do something like that. I don't think he

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Speaker 1: has a bunch of dates. No. I think that that's

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Speaker 1: what internet dating has done to everybody. It's made people

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Speaker 1: have options that probably shouldn't always have that many options. Really,

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Speaker 1: all you have to do is have no k picture

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Speaker 1: and some interests, and you can find dates online, so

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Speaker 1: he probably did have a lot of dates up. He's

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Speaker 1: probably also not going to be getting a lot of

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Speaker 1: calls back from those dates. They're all first dates. I mean,

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Speaker 1: let's be honest, we're not like talking. He's got a

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Speaker 1: lot of relationships on the line right now. I'm assuming

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Speaker 1: Paul will be back for more second date updates. Actually

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Speaker 1: it's only going to be Paul now in second day updates.

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Speaker 1: It's like another one didn't call me back. I don't

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Speaker 1: know why. Yeah,