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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Jonas is Sam your og Okay Storytime

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Speaker 1: podcast hosts.

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Speaker 2: We have some great stories coming up, but before that,

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Speaker 2: we have a quick two minute break from the sponsors

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Speaker 2: that keep the show alive. A solicitor exposed my cheating husband.

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Speaker 2: I think it's time to leave him, and it's time.

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Speaker 2: I'm too bye. I have been informed by a solicitor

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Speaker 2: that my husband is having an affair. Yesterday morning, I

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Speaker 2: was contacted by a solicitor. I was confused because I

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Speaker 2: don't have any need for one for anything. She told

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Speaker 2: me that her client is seeking a divorce from his

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Speaker 2: wife due to the wife having an affair. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from user and un cheated throwaway on the

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Speaker 2: r slash Okay Storytime sabreddit. So their investigator found the

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Speaker 2: affair is with my husband, and the client asked the

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Speaker 2: solicitors to inform me. Since my husband is married, she

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Speaker 2: provided me with proof of the affair. My brother in

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Speaker 2: law is to be married on Saturday. My husband is

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Speaker 2: the best man and is already there to assist everything.

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Speaker 2: Me and my five month old daughter were supposed to

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Speaker 2: leave on Friday morning to join them. My husband is

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Speaker 2: unaware that I know I am shocked, but the proof

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Speaker 2: is right in front of my eyes. I haven't told anyone,

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Speaker 2: but I have asked my sister to come over after work.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to ask if my daughter and me can

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Speaker 2: stay with her. I don't think I can facem at

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Speaker 2: the wedding. I don't want to hear excuses. My sister's

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Speaker 2: husband is a solicitor, and while he does not do divorces,

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Speaker 2: I'll ask if he can recommend someone. I have to

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Speaker 2: talk to my sister, but I'm mostly just getting my

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Speaker 2: thoughts out on here because I feel entirely scattered. Here's

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Speaker 2: some comments. Ope on if the solicitor who contacted her

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Speaker 2: is a real and licensed person to inform her about

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Speaker 2: the affair. OHP says yes, of course, the solicitor who

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Speaker 2: contacted me is a licensed solicitor. The proof was not photographic,

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Speaker 2: but included videos, voicemails, and receipts. I would question a

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Speaker 2: singular photo, but not this. The solicitor also informed me

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Speaker 2: she is not able to advise me or take me

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Speaker 2: as a client due to conflict of interest, but will

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Speaker 2: provide the information to my solicitor should I pursue it.

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Speaker 2: Divorce Opee on exposing her husband's affair and her excuse

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Speaker 2: for not attending the brother in law's wedding. I think

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Speaker 2: I'm going to tell him that I was exposed to

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Speaker 2: COVID so I have an excuse not to go, and

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Speaker 2: then tell him I know on Sunday morning. I don't

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Speaker 2: want to tell him before the wedding because his brother

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Speaker 2: and his brother's girlfriend are lovely people, and I don't

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Speaker 2: want anything to spoil their day, including my husband being

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Speaker 2: upset while playing such a big role in their wedding.

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Speaker 2: I would feel awful if I did that to them.

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Speaker 2: He's giving a reading at the wedding, a speech at

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Speaker 2: the reception, and helping his brother prepare and doing other

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Speaker 2: duties to ensure it goes smoothly. I don't care how

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Speaker 2: he feels, but I don't want his emotions to get

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Speaker 2: in the way or spoil the day for the bride

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Speaker 2: and groom. It is for their benefit, not his. I

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Speaker 2: assume this is a reply to a comment telling her

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Speaker 2: that she needs to press the issue right now. I

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Speaker 2: respectfully disagree, and with the wedding only days away, I

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Speaker 2: will not do anything to spoil it. There would be

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Speaker 2: no time to bring someone in to do all the

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Speaker 2: things my husband is responsible for. It's hardly a sacrifice

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Speaker 2: to wait one more day. I don't even want to

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Speaker 2: tell him until I'm at my sister's. Anyway, you may disagree,

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Speaker 2: and that's fine. I'm thinking of his brother and the

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Speaker 2: bride and their day. Opie responds to multiple comments about

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Speaker 2: not leaving the house, kicking the husband out, transfer her

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Speaker 2: money from their accounts to a new bank account. Opie says,

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Speaker 2: we do not own a home. We rent a flat. Additionally,

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Speaker 2: we must be separated for two out of the next

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Speaker 2: three years in order to obtain a divorce. I will

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Speaker 2: not be remaining in our flat. I can get my

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Speaker 2: own once I'm ready. If I emptied the accounts, I

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Speaker 2: could be subject to trouble during the divorce process. That

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Speaker 2: is not allowed. Does Opie know anything about the other

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Speaker 2: woman and if she knows about the divorce in progress,

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Speaker 2: Opie says, I have no idea who this other woman is.

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Speaker 2: The solicitor who contacted me informed me that her client

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Speaker 2: will be telling his wife about the divorce next week

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Speaker 2: and told me to do what I needed so I

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Speaker 2: have time and here comes the update.

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Speaker 1: What a messy, messy situation? What again, OPI is done

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Speaker 1: it properly. Opie's thinking reasonably and with their head on straight.

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Speaker 2: My update, I told my husband I had been exposed

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Speaker 2: to COVID and couldn't attend a wedding. My sister helped

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Speaker 2: pack and she is letting me and my daughter stay

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Speaker 2: with her until I find a flat someone I work

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Speaker 2: with as a family member who has one up that

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Speaker 2: I can afford that's available in January. When my husband

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Speaker 2: returned home on Monday, there was a note telling him

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Speaker 2: I knew about the affair. The husband of the other

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Speaker 2: woman was going to be filing for divorce later that week,

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Speaker 2: and I would not be far behind. My sister's husband

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Speaker 2: is a solicitor, and he recommended a divorce solicitor to me.

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Speaker 2: My husband and I both have jobs, we don't own

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Speaker 2: a home. At the advice of my solicitor, I opened

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Speaker 2: a new bank account for myself, but I did not

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Speaker 2: touch any of our joint accounts. I'm not stopping my

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Speaker 2: husband from seeing our daughter, and my solicitors said the

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Speaker 2: law will favor sharing of custody unless it's about our daughter.

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Speaker 2: I told my husband to have his solicitor talk to mine.

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Speaker 2: I won't discuss anything else with him. Once we have

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Speaker 2: been separated for two years, we can get a divorce.

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Speaker 2: My solicitor said, there is no way to shorten the

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Speaker 2: time requirement. Thank you everyone who showed me kindness, and

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Speaker 2: there are some relevant comments, but real quick. Kind of

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Speaker 2: blows my mind that even in a case of like

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Speaker 2: infidelity cheating, you have to be separated for two years.

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Speaker 2: I think in the UK it's the law.

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Speaker 1: I guess people who are from the UK you know

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Speaker 1: better than us in this point in the story.

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Speaker 2: Yes, is there any workaround? Relevant comments op on the

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Speaker 2: country's law for divorces and if there are any strict

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Speaker 2: laws regarding infidelity. In Ireland, divorce was not made legal

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Speaker 2: until twenty five years ago. What I mean, Hey, it's

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Speaker 2: better late than never. I guess right, I'm kind of speechless.

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Speaker 2: That's kind of crazy. Well, I know, there's a lot

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Speaker 2: of other countries that have some really intensive Well I

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Speaker 2: guess to be fair, it's like just the stipulation is

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Speaker 2: that it wasn't legal in Ireland, So I guess there

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Speaker 2: was just a bunch of illegal divorces going on. I

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Speaker 2: don't know before that, divorces were not allowed at all. Oh,

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Speaker 2: never mind until twenty nineteen, a couple had to be

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Speaker 2: separated for four years, not the two years that it

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Speaker 2: is now. WHOA wow, that's that's huge. Yeah, twenty nineteen,

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Speaker 2: that's crazy. In Ireland, divorce is no fault. It would

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Speaker 2: also not make a difference anyways, as we aren't wealthy,

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Speaker 2: don't own a home or any significant assets, and are

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Speaker 2: both employed. Op on using an app to communicate with

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Speaker 2: her soon to be ex husband regarding co parenting their daughter.

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Speaker 2: That's what we are doing, at the recommendation of both

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Speaker 2: our solicitors. I have held firm on only discussing things

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Speaker 2: related to our daughter. Anything else goes to our solicitors.

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Speaker 2: Update two. This is years later. The update is that

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Speaker 2: I am now divorced. I live in Ireland. It's a

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Speaker 2: requirement that couples live apart for two years before they

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Speaker 2: can be divorced.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So we got a time a literal two year tests, two.

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Speaker 2: Year time scale. Okay. At least there are no exceptions

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Speaker 2: under the law to this used to be four years,

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Speaker 2: and up until nineteen ninety eight, divorce was not legal

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Speaker 2: in Ireland at all. My daughter and I lived with

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Speaker 2: my sister for almost three months before I moved us

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Speaker 2: into our own flat. My husband and I did not

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Speaker 2: own any property, and I legally had no authority to

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Speaker 2: ask him to leave the flat we had while we

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Speaker 2: were married, so I left instead. On the advice of

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Speaker 2: my solicitor, I opened my own bank account and left

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Speaker 2: our jointly owned accounts alone to be settled in the divorce.

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Speaker 2: While we were living apart, my husband and I used

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Speaker 2: an app to communicate at our daughter, and everything else

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Speaker 2: was through our solicitors. I haven't talked to him about

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Speaker 2: the affair. I haven't talked to his family or friends,

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Speaker 2: and I don't have social media. My husband carried on

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Speaker 2: seeing the other woman for several months after I moved out,

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Speaker 2: so I'm sure everyone knows he had an affair, but

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Speaker 2: that isn't my problem now. By the way, we have

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Speaker 2: no problem with you joining us when we go live

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Speaker 2: every single weekday at three PMPST on Facebook, YouTube and Twitch.

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Speaker 2: Just tap our profile.

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Speaker 1: Seems very just easy by not easy in two years.

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Speaker 1: But the way this like, it doesn't seem messy. The

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Speaker 1: husband is not arguing about anything now the person the affair,

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Speaker 1: the affairs husband looks like that seemed like it was

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Speaker 1: go through and it just seems like everything's like all

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Speaker 1: right after the two long, stinky years devor the divorce.

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Speaker 2: Who separated stinkers? I guess the lesson here really is,

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Speaker 2: don't get married in Ireland. It's too hard to cut

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Speaker 2: it off. She should have been able, she should have

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Speaker 2: been able to leave this man instantaneously after he cheated

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Speaker 2: on Okay, he should she should have been able to

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Speaker 2: leave and win any whatever. Why are you so good

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Speaker 2: at this?

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Speaker 1: Why are you so good at just making bad comments

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Speaker 1: about countries? The lesson here is don't get married.

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Speaker 2: Don't get legally married in Ireland. Get married in a

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Speaker 2: country that lets you leave someone if they cheat on you,

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Speaker 2: and then if you want to live in Ireland, you

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Speaker 2: can live there. It's just you're not married in Ireland.

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Speaker 2: The lesson here is what's the problem with that? The

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Speaker 2: lesson here is just don't cheat. Cheating is bad, especially

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Speaker 2: if we have a child involved. That's dumb.

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Speaker 1: Now you're having really bad just a bad environment, not

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Speaker 1: a bad environment, but it's like that's so toxic because

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Speaker 1: you want to have a healthy environment for that child.

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Speaker 2: And look at that. That's fair. I mean, if you

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Speaker 2: think the cheaters will listen, Yeah, that's fair. I don't

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Speaker 2: know if anyone's ever been successfully like changed from being

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Speaker 2: a cheater. From hearing someone be like, don't cheat, they

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Speaker 2: were like, oh my god, why didn't anyone ever tell

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Speaker 2: me that sooner? Like everybody knows it's wrong.

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Speaker 1: Don't get married if you're a cheater, unless if you're

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Speaker 1: a cheat, I guess.

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Speaker 2: Unless you're a cheater. The only thing I talk about

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Speaker 2: with him is our daughter and anything related to her.

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Speaker 2: We have joint custody, and I will pay him maintenance.

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Speaker 2: Fault is not considered in a divorce, and an affair

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Speaker 2: doesn't affect custody. I do not have to pay maintenance

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Speaker 2: to my husband for himself, since he's already living with

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Speaker 2: another woman, not the one he had an affair with,

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Speaker 2: and plans to marry her right away now that we're divorced.

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Speaker 2: If he had been living on his own and not

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Speaker 2: about to get married, I would have had to pay

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Speaker 2: him maintenance. I've never met the woman he had an

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Speaker 2: affair with, or her husband, or their children. My focus

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Speaker 2: is on my daughter, and I am civil with her

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Speaker 2: father for her sake. But I don't care about looking

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Speaker 2: on social media or talking to him about the affair.

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Speaker 2: I have never talked to him about it and never will.

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Speaker 2: I only care about my daughter. Apologies if my update

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Speaker 2: isn't exciting. I am divorced. There's no drama, and I

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Speaker 2: know that's usually not exciting, but some people have been

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Speaker 2: messaging asking for an update, and I wanted to say

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Speaker 2: thank you to all the lovely people who offered me

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Speaker 2: support during a terrible time. Glad to hear you're doing well.

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Speaker 2: May things only get better from here?

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Speaker 1: No, it looks like you cut the toxic part or

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Speaker 1: like the again, your husband was toxic and cheated, and it,

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Speaker 1: like I said at the very beginning of this, like

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Speaker 1: not very good being of the story. But earlier is

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Speaker 1: this was very civil, OPI did things in the most

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Speaker 1: civil manner and it worked out so well. And again

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Speaker 1: she's like keeping the father of their daughter in their

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Speaker 1: lives for her sake.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's good, that's really good. Good. But that's

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Speaker 2: the end of that story.

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Speaker 1: Happy for OP got out of it nice and safe

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Speaker 1: and yes, Easypsy, even though divorce sucks.

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Speaker 2: Good for Op.

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Speaker 1: My fiance cheated on me with my best friend. Our

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Speaker 1: wedding is in one week. Are you sure about that?

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Speaker 2: Hi?

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Speaker 1: I made a throwaway account because my fiance knows my

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Speaker 1: Reddit account and I need advice and I'm kind of panicking.

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Speaker 1: So if things in this post don't make sense, please

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Speaker 1: bear with me. I feel like I'm being gasolt and

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Speaker 1: I just don't know what to do. Let me give

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Speaker 1: you guys some backstories so you can understand the situation.

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Speaker 1: I am in my best friend. We will call her Mary,

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Speaker 1: and my fiance will call them Kevin. Mary and Kevin

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Speaker 1: have known each other for a while now. Kevin told

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Speaker 1: me he used to like her when they were kids,

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Speaker 1: but it was just a silly childhood crush and nothing

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Speaker 1: came of it. By the way, this comes from user

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Speaker 1: cheating bf throwaway on the r slash ok storytime supered it.

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Speaker 1: So in high school I wind up meeting Mary and

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Speaker 1: we became very close bonded friends. We shared all the

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Speaker 1: same interest We would hang out all the time, and

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Speaker 1: our relationship has been great until recently. My fiance, Kevin,

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Speaker 1: and I have been together since a year after I

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Speaker 1: met Mary. She introduced us and we hit it off.

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Speaker 1: I absolutely love my fiance. He meant the world to me.

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Speaker 1: We have been together for six years and we have

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Speaker 1: a place together and we have been through so much.

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Speaker 2: That's so great. I'm sure nothing bad about to happen

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Speaker 2: happily ever after the end, that's the end of the story.

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Speaker 1: And I thought the feeling was mutual. About three years ago,

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Speaker 1: when COVID came around, I started to notice that Mary

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Speaker 1: has been staying over at my house while I'm out

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Speaker 1: for work. I'd see her car by the time I

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Speaker 1: get home, and she still would be there. This made

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Speaker 1: me feel a little uncomfortable, but I ignored it because

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Speaker 1: they have known each other basically their whole lives, and honestly,

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Speaker 1: they are friends and it shouldn't be a big deal.

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Speaker 1: Then I started noticing other things. When we would go

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Speaker 1: out to dinner as a group, he would sit next

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Speaker 1: to her instead of me, or when we would go out,

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Speaker 1: he would stick closely to her and not me. Oh

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Speaker 1: even when walking he would keep up with her instead.

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Speaker 1: Just other things that I told him was bothering me,

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Speaker 1: And he told me that I was just being paranoid

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Speaker 1: and it was nothing, And I, of course think, maybe

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Speaker 1: I am being paranoid, and maybe it's just really.

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Speaker 2: Am I paranoid? Or did you forget who your girlfriend is?

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Speaker 1: I mean, they're friends, but the fact that he's on

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Speaker 1: attached to the hip to marry twenty four to seven

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Speaker 1: and she's there twenty four to seven.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like brother sister, a little ivy.

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Speaker 1: Then other things like them maybe being a little too intimate,

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Speaker 1: or even her cuddling into him on the couch, things

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Speaker 1: I didn't see before, but he told me she was

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Speaker 1: always like that. And again, maybe I'm just being paranoid.

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Speaker 1: At this point, everything they do is starting to eat

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Speaker 1: away at me, and I feel like I'm going crazy.

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Speaker 1: It makes me feel so guilty for feeling like my

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Speaker 1: boyfriend at the time was cheating. At some point, I

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Speaker 1: let it go and try and move on. About a

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Speaker 1: month passes by and Mary starts seeing someone we will

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Speaker 1: call him Dave. Dave is a really good guy, has

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Speaker 1: a good head on his shoulders, does things, buy the book,

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Speaker 1: and he's a complete gentleman conspiracy.

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Speaker 2: Dave and Op end up together, I hope. So I

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Speaker 2: hope Dave and Op end up together. Okay.

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Speaker 1: Mary suggests we all go out to dinner together as

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Speaker 1: a couple, and of course I agree because I want

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Speaker 1: to meet Dave. We are all out and I noticed

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Speaker 1: that the behaviors I seen from them stopped all the

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Speaker 1: weird gestures, all the being close, et cetera. It stopped,

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Speaker 1: it starts making my stomach churn, and I wind up

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Speaker 1: feeling sick in the middle of the dinner and ask

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Speaker 1: to be excused to take some time outside. Dave asked

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Speaker 1: to join me, and I agreed.

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Speaker 2: Oh, here comes Dave.

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Speaker 1: Dave's asking me, am I okay that I didn't look

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Speaker 1: good since we started eating and whatnot. I just at

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Speaker 1: the point felt so lost and confused, and I had thoughts.

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Speaker 1: I just couldn't formulate into words, and everything just felt

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Speaker 1: so confusing. I asked him can he drop Kevin off

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Speaker 1: because I wasn't feeling well. He agreed, and I drive

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Speaker 1: myself home. By that time it was eight pm. I

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Speaker 1: get home to take a bath and head into my

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Speaker 1: room or turn on some YouTube on my TV, and

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Speaker 1: I fall asleep. I wake up around twelve am and

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Speaker 1: Kevin isn't home yet. I'm confused. I call his phone.

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Speaker 1: He is an answering, so I'm thinking maybe he went

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Speaker 1: to his friends to drink and maybe got wasted, fell asleep.

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Speaker 1: He does this sometimes after we all go out of

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Speaker 1: a group, so I see nothing wrong with it.

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Speaker 2: You know, you should try to call instead Dave. I

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Speaker 2: think you should try to call Mary. Now called Dave.

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Speaker 2: Mary might know where he is. Actually, I would call

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Speaker 2: Dave because.

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Speaker 1: Dave, well, we just es it probably doesn't have Dave's number,

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Speaker 1: so yeah, the next person would be go and call her.

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Speaker 1: I go back to sleep. I feel movement in the

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Speaker 1: bed and it's him. I turned to look at my

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Speaker 1: phone and it's now five am. I'm really confused, and

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Speaker 1: I asked him where he was and he told me

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Speaker 1: he was over at his friend's house, Dom, let's call

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Speaker 1: him dom Dom's house. I smell the booze, so I

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Speaker 1: think that he was over drinking and whatever.

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Speaker 2: I think nothing of it.

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Speaker 1: Fast forward three years later to yesterday night. Oh three

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Speaker 1: year time skit three years So everything's good, I guess

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Speaker 1: everyone that was like just a one night. Nothing happens

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Speaker 1: with Mary. Time goes by smoothly, everything's okay. I get

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Speaker 1: a call from Dave. It's been a while since I

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Speaker 1: heard from him, and I asked him what's up, you know,

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Speaker 1: catching up and whatnot, and he says, hey, remember that

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Speaker 1: night we first met.

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Speaker 2: And I'm like, yeah, I remember, that was.

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Speaker 1: So long ago, and he goes, this has been sitting

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Speaker 1: in the back of my mind for a bit. But

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Speaker 1: what did you and Mary do when she went over

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Speaker 1: to check up on you?

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Speaker 2: I no, Oh my god. I wanted Op and Dave

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00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:29,600
Speaker 2: because we knew that there was gonna be infidelity from

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Speaker 2: the beginning of this story. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for them

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Speaker 2: to also be the way they discover it. They discover

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Speaker 2: it together at the same moment they're like, wait, they

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Speaker 2: are meant to be. It's a trauma bond. It's a

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Speaker 2: trauma bond. Yes, whatever, I'm here for it.

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Speaker 1: I felt my whole body stiffen and I almost start

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Speaker 1: sobbing on the phone. I'll tell Dave, I'll call him back.

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Speaker 1: I go to my fiance and I ask him if

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Speaker 1: he remembered what he and Dom did day we met Dave.

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Speaker 1: He proceeded to tell me that he has no clue

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Speaker 1: what I'm talking about. He never went to Dom's place

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Speaker 1: to hang out. At this point, I feel all the

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00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:02,320
Speaker 1: signs start to align. Wow, and I'm losing it. But

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Speaker 1: you know what, you won't lose it with us by

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Speaker 1: joining us three pm PST on YouTube, Facebook, Twitch, TikTok

363
00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:11,680
Speaker 1: three pm PST. Just tap our profile dap it there's

364
00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:13,600
Speaker 1: another relevant update, but let's discuss.

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Speaker 2: Please get with Dave. That's I know that it's you know,

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Speaker 2: it's it's gonna be hard because scratching my head.

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Speaker 1: This is crazy that this was the one instant and

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Speaker 1: then three years later, just three years later, out of

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Speaker 1: the blue.

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Speaker 2: I want to know how Dave, why Dave brought this up?

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Speaker 2: How do the problem? He had his own suspicions, But

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Speaker 2: it's three years down the line. It's three years down

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Speaker 2: the line.

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Speaker 1: Everything is peachy, everything's great, everything's cool.

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Speaker 2: Now, maybe he's he's had new suspicions in these three years,

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00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:43,440
Speaker 2: and he always maybe it was they literally had identical

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00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,040
Speaker 2: experiences where it was like they both were kind of

378
00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:49,000
Speaker 2: like that's weird, but I won't it's no big deal, right,

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00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:52,600
Speaker 2: And then over time it clearly ate away at Dave.

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00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:55,200
Speaker 2: And then all it took was him saying that one

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Speaker 2: thing in OP, well he started sobbings. So it's like

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Speaker 2: it OP also until the trade.

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Speaker 1: But I just want to know how it legit came up,

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Speaker 1: because this didn't just like randomly come up.

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Speaker 2: This had something had to come up. Maybe we'll find

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Speaker 2: out in the we'll find out.

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Speaker 1: I asked Kevin. Was he cheating on me with Mary.

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Speaker 1: He says no. I tell him I don't believe him.

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Speaker 1: He tells me, I'm crazy and I have no clue

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00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:18,160
Speaker 1: what I'm talking about. We argue about it all day.

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00:17:18,240 --> 00:17:20,159
Speaker 1: Earlier today, I get a call from Dom and he

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Speaker 1: confesses to me that my fiance has been cheating on

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Speaker 1: me with Mary and he knew about sa look at that.

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Speaker 2: He just jumped to that.

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Speaker 1: It was a little argument and then Dom was like, yeah, no,

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Speaker 1: he was doing it, and he felt bad because he

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Speaker 1: thought our relationship wasn't really serious. Now that we are

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Speaker 1: planning on getting married, he decided to speak on it.

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Speaker 2: Dom, you suck. I mean, come on, you can't switch

400
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:43,680
Speaker 2: up like that. You gotta stand on that from the

401
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:45,880
Speaker 2: very beginning. I think you guys were serious. You guys

402
00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:48,640
Speaker 2: were dating for three years. Dude. If you find out

403
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Speaker 2: somebody's cheating on somebody, nine times out of ten, so bad.

404
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:56,280
Speaker 2: There are like so few situations in which you would

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Speaker 2: not tell that person in a sense that is like

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Speaker 2: because that's the best, right. This is not one of

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00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:03,480
Speaker 2: those times you just you tell that immediately, Oh he

408
00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,480
Speaker 2: was cheating on you. But you guys aren't that serious.

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Speaker 2: So I didn't tell her he's three.

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Speaker 1: There's three bad guys here, Kevin, Mary and Don all bad,

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Speaker 1: all bad.

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Speaker 2: We love Dave.

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Speaker 1: He shows me all their text messages and everything from

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Speaker 1: years ago, and honestly, even thinking about it, my heart

415
00:18:17,359 --> 00:18:19,760
Speaker 1: is breaking. I feel like I've been gas lip for

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00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:22,879
Speaker 1: years and I feel like I'm going crazy. We're getting

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Speaker 1: married in a week from now, and I feel like

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Speaker 1: I've been wasting my time. I don't know what to do.

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Speaker 1: I'm really looking for advice, anything helps ps. I'm not

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00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:33,480
Speaker 1: even sure if Dave knows about this, and honestly, I

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Speaker 1: don't know how to tell him.

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Speaker 2: And that's the end. What that is the end of it.

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00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:42,399
Speaker 1: There's nothing more one tell Dave two break up and

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Speaker 1: the relationship.

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00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,399
Speaker 2: You're not getting married. That's it.

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Speaker 1: You already know you're not get married. Call out the engagement,

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00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:47,600
Speaker 1: call off the wedding done.

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Speaker 2: That's it.

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Speaker 1: That's that's bad advice. Easy, Yeah, Mary, Dave.

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Speaker 2: You are not get married married to Kevin? What do

431
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:58,719
Speaker 2: I do? I? Well, you're you break off the engagement. Vin.

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Speaker 1: Kevin's like, hey, what's we do? That night three years

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Speaker 1: ago when we met, Dave? You were at Dom's right,

434
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:05,639
Speaker 1: you were really drunk. No, I was never at thobs.

435
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:06,399
Speaker 1: Well we eat it.

436
00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:10,160
Speaker 2: Uh, I don't know, but shut up. We're getting married

437
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:10,560
Speaker 2: in a week.

438
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:12,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, are you asking all these stupid questions?

439
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,439
Speaker 2: Three years ago? Were get married. We'll see you in

440
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:18,120
Speaker 2: the next one. Let's go. I exposed my cheating husband

441
00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:22,840
Speaker 2: and best friend at a family reunion. Now I'm leaving

442
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:26,320
Speaker 2: for good. That's for the good, that is for the gooder.

443
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:29,840
Speaker 2: For some backstory, I twenty six female, and my husband,

444
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:33,119
Speaker 2: twenty seven male, have been married for three years now

445
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,760
Speaker 2: and have known each other for five. We initially met

446
00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:38,320
Speaker 2: through our two best friends as they were dating. On

447
00:19:38,359 --> 00:19:40,639
Speaker 2: our first date, we hit it off. We had so

448
00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:44,200
Speaker 2: much in common and realized we lived in the same

449
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:48,480
Speaker 2: apartment building. By the way, this comes from user dangerouse

450
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:52,119
Speaker 2: on the r slash Okay storytime subreddit. So now, my

451
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:55,280
Speaker 2: best friend Sarah didn't want me to meet John at first,

452
00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:58,600
Speaker 2: but her boyfriend Tom forced her to agree as he

453
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,160
Speaker 2: thought it would be a good match. Sarah kept telling

454
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,480
Speaker 2: me how he wasn't a good person and I shouldn't

455
00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:06,199
Speaker 2: go out with people like that. I was confused, but

456
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,320
Speaker 2: didn't listen to her because at the time I was

457
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,200
Speaker 2: single and from the sound of it.

458
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:13,920
Speaker 1: Ready to mingle, always ready to mingle when you're single.

459
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:17,160
Speaker 2: Here's a little bit about Sarah. She's the jealous type.

460
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:20,040
Speaker 2: Anytime anything good happens to me, she always finds a

461
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,800
Speaker 2: reason to put me down. For example, I bought a

462
00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,800
Speaker 2: dress that I had been saving for a while, and

463
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:28,240
Speaker 2: instead of being happy for me, she said, finally, I

464
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:31,720
Speaker 2: could have bought three already. I laughed them off as jokes,

465
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:35,080
Speaker 2: but now it makes sense. Now. Me and my husband

466
00:20:35,119 --> 00:20:38,040
Speaker 2: have never gotten into a huge argument over the course

467
00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:40,159
Speaker 2: of our relationship, and from the looks of it, you

468
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:43,000
Speaker 2: would think we're both happy together. Last week, we went

469
00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:46,359
Speaker 2: on vacation to a nice hotel resort, and the first

470
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:49,760
Speaker 2: night there, I feel nauseated, so I tell John to

471
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:52,359
Speaker 2: go to dinner without me. He said no at first,

472
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:55,439
Speaker 2: and then decided to go. When he left, I realized

473
00:20:55,480 --> 00:21:00,399
Speaker 2: that he had left his phone. Dun, dun, dun. The

474
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:03,480
Speaker 2: phone just wouldn't stop buzzing, so out of curiosity, I

475
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:07,159
Speaker 2: checked it. I couldn't have ever imagined my husband and

476
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:11,119
Speaker 2: best friend would ever do this. It was picture upon

477
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:16,520
Speaker 2: picture and text of them together. The texts were disgusting.

478
00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:19,199
Speaker 2: I felt sick everything he said to me he was

479
00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:22,639
Speaker 2: saying to Sarah. She kept asking him when he would

480
00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 2: leave and go to her. I felt enraged. This girl,

481
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,840
Speaker 2: who I thought to be my best friend was a

482
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:33,800
Speaker 2: backstabbing bee and my husband a cheater. Instead of getting angry,

483
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:38,040
Speaker 2: I took screenshots of all of the pictures, messages, everything.

484
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:41,200
Speaker 2: This had been going on a few weeks before our wedding,

485
00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:44,680
Speaker 2: and he got cold feet. In that moment, I felt

486
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:47,840
Speaker 2: so betrayed. I got back in bed and waited for him.

487
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:50,920
Speaker 2: He came back and I greeted him warmly. I decided

488
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,960
Speaker 2: to enjoy myself on my vacation and I barely talked

489
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:57,200
Speaker 2: to him the whole time. He kept asking what was wrong,

490
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,639
Speaker 2: and I just replied with I'm not well. I'm not

491
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:00,320
Speaker 2: feeling well.

492
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:01,959
Speaker 1: I'm a feeling well, but I'm gonna go have some

493
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:03,240
Speaker 1: drinks and have a good time.

494
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,480
Speaker 2: Just saying I don't feel well, and then just going

495
00:22:05,480 --> 00:22:07,560
Speaker 2: out and partying, and then you get home. I just

496
00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:08,600
Speaker 2: don't really feel that good.

497
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:11,160
Speaker 1: I don't feel well with you because you suck, yeah,

498
00:22:11,160 --> 00:22:11,960
Speaker 1: because you're stinky.

499
00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:14,679
Speaker 2: Once we got back, his mother hosted a reunion and

500
00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:18,040
Speaker 2: invited us both. This was my chance. I had to

501
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,480
Speaker 2: make it perfect. I put on my favorite dress, did

502
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:24,240
Speaker 2: my makeup super well, and put on my most expensive jewelry.

503
00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:27,560
Speaker 2: When we arrived, I greeted all of my in laws.

504
00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 2: It was outside, and I waited until everyone showed up.

505
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:35,320
Speaker 2: Then I asked to get everyone's attention. My husband looked pleased,

506
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:37,399
Speaker 2: but little did he know I was about to ruin

507
00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:41,040
Speaker 2: his life. I pulled out my phone and told everyone

508
00:22:41,840 --> 00:22:45,439
Speaker 2: very loudly that my husband had been cheating on me

509
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:50,159
Speaker 2: for over three years and had multiple affairs, which was

510
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 2: true as he had confessed before. Everyone looked shocked and

511
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:57,600
Speaker 2: stared at my husband as he stood there mortified. I

512
00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:01,760
Speaker 2: handed him the divorce papers and walked out. She served him,

513
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:05,920
Speaker 2: that's crazy, Served, and I'll be on my way. Served

514
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,440
Speaker 2: and served. He chased after me and kept saying it

515
00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:13,240
Speaker 2: was all mistake. Now his whole family is furious with him.

516
00:23:13,280 --> 00:23:16,360
Speaker 2: So am I the A hole? I'll keep updating. As

517
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,159
Speaker 2: of now, he won't agree to sign the papers. I

518
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:21,040
Speaker 2: don't think you're the a hole. I think the a

519
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:24,000
Speaker 2: hole would be your you know fiance who is cheating

520
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,520
Speaker 2: on you for three years. Hi, guys, to anyone reading,

521
00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,920
Speaker 2: I sincerely apologize for my bad grammar. I've tried to

522
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:30,560
Speaker 2: fix most of the mistakes that you told me about.

523
00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,840
Speaker 2: Let's get into that first update. In my initial post,

524
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:35,639
Speaker 2: I left this out, but Sarah confessed to one of

525
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:38,400
Speaker 2: our mutual friends that she had had a crush on

526
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:41,560
Speaker 2: John ever since she met him, but since she was

527
00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:45,960
Speaker 2: dating Tom, she didn't say anything. I also recently told Tom,

528
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:49,800
Speaker 2: and he broke off his engagement with Sarah. We've been

529
00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:52,560
Speaker 2: each other's support recently. I've grown fond of him, and

530
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:54,200
Speaker 2: I am surprised to say I like him a bit.

531
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:57,400
Speaker 2: I will say I'm definitely not ready to date yet

532
00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:59,800
Speaker 2: at all, but Tom and I have been close since

533
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:03,520
Speaker 2: for meeting. Still, my mental health is ready for a relationship.

534
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:07,159
Speaker 2: Update number two. John has broke up with Sarah. I

535
00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:09,480
Speaker 2: found it out from a close friend of Sarah that

536
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:13,040
Speaker 2: she is in hysterics. All John said was that he

537
00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:15,480
Speaker 2: didn't want to break off his marriage, He just wanted

538
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:18,919
Speaker 2: to fling. Unbelievably, John tried to call me demanding I

539
00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:22,440
Speaker 2: do couples therapy. When I refused, he cursed me out.

540
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 2: I hung up. He still won't sign the papers and

541
00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,359
Speaker 2: I have hired a better divorce lawyer who's helping me.

542
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:30,480
Speaker 2: Tom has been an amazing support. I feel that he's

543
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:35,960
Speaker 2: also drawn to me. We might potentially date, but as

544
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,160
Speaker 2: of now, I think we are both better off single.

545
00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:42,479
Speaker 2: Thank you for all your support. Update number three. How

546
00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,600
Speaker 2: do we feel about Ope and Tom two together? Too soon?

547
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,119
Speaker 2: Too soon? Yeah? But how do we feel about it?

548
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:51,119
Speaker 2: Like on the happiness scale? Are we like five out

549
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:51,399
Speaker 2: of ten?

550
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 1: I'm I'm happy because it's like getting back at Sarah. Yeah,

551
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 1: But also I don't like it because it's like it's

552
00:24:56,800 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 1: too just intertwined. There's just too much cross If you

553
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 1: guys can lost contamination here, if you guys can fully.

554
00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:07,160
Speaker 2: Move on and be healed from the current relationship you're

555
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,080
Speaker 2: in this fast too. No, I'm not saying I agree

556
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 2: it's too fast for them to start really dating right now.

557
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,240
Speaker 2: But if you guys, do you know when you fully

558
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,240
Speaker 2: heal from this? I think it'd be great if you

559
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,560
Speaker 2: guys dated again. I don't know anything about this guy,

560
00:25:18,840 --> 00:25:20,160
Speaker 2: just say it would be so great.

561
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:23,240
Speaker 1: It's just a haha to Sarah and to John it's

562
00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:23,920
Speaker 1: just a haha.

563
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:27,679
Speaker 2: It's sweet revenge. I will share Sarah's reaction here. I

564
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:29,840
Speaker 2: went to her house and showed her the proof and

565
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:34,400
Speaker 2: asked her how she could do something so horrible. Her response,

566
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,639
Speaker 2: what did you expect John to be married to a fat,

567
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:40,400
Speaker 2: ugly pig and be happy? So we're throwing her into

568
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 2: the sun. I was shattered when she said that. Now

569
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:45,679
Speaker 2: I'm not proud of what I did next, but I

570
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:49,080
Speaker 2: slapped her and left. Now. To be clear, I have

571
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:51,760
Speaker 2: always struggled with my weight, but I wouldn't say I

572
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 2: was fat. I have gotten therapy for my eating disorders,

573
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 2: but that just made all that time seem like a waste.

574
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:01,400
Speaker 2: I'm sorry to hear that. Don't let your don't let

575
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 2: one stupid comment a friend who's so jealous of you.

576
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 2: She's like sleeping with your fiance. That's something a jealous

577
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:08,160
Speaker 2: person does.

578
00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:09,680
Speaker 1: At the end of the day, it thinks this person

579
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:12,879
Speaker 1: just wants everything to herself and you don't need that.

580
00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:16,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, Sarah sucks. We hate Sarah. I'm done, So I've

581
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 2: booked a flight to China and I'm running away. I

582
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:19,560
Speaker 2: know what.

583
00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:21,960
Speaker 1: Hell, yeah, you deserve you deserve it. I was like,

584
00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 1: why child, But you know what, run run run to China.

585
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 1: Bring bring Tom, Tom, and bring bring Tom. It's way

586
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 1: easier to bring Tom to China, bring China to Tom.

587
00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, hah, Sarah. I know this must sound childish, but

588
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:38,080
Speaker 2: I can't handle it anymore. It's all too much. I

589
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:40,520
Speaker 2: feel like I'm gonna die. So this is for the best.

590
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:42,960
Speaker 2: I'm not telling anyone I'm leaving tonight. I will update

591
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:46,000
Speaker 2: after I land if anybody has questions. And by the way,

592
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:49,159
Speaker 2: if you have questions, let us know when we go

593
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:53,399
Speaker 2: live every weekday at three pm PST on YouTube, Facebook,

594
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 2: and Twitch. Just tap our profile. Just tap it. Spontaneous,

595
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,879
Speaker 2: Opie said, you know what, I think, She's like, you

596
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,560
Speaker 2: know what, Tom doing this thing with Tom. It's all

597
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:05,720
Speaker 2: too much. I'm getting out. I need to get out.

598
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:09,199
Speaker 2: I need to get somewhere that's so radically different from

599
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:11,399
Speaker 2: where I'm at right now in this moment. China is

600
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:12,640
Speaker 2: the place for me. That's great.

601
00:27:12,720 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 1: I love that the spontaneous, Like how spontaneous it was,

602
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:17,760
Speaker 1: and just like, you know what, like I said, push

603
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:19,240
Speaker 1: it all away. You don't need to be involved in this,

604
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 1: you don't need this.

605
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:23,159
Speaker 2: Perfect truly didn't tell anybody great. That takes a lot

606
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,080
Speaker 2: of courage, a lot of bravery. One day she's like,

607
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:27,840
Speaker 2: all right to just up and move, just be like,

608
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:29,679
Speaker 2: I'm not telling anybody. No one knows where I'm going

609
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,360
Speaker 2: except for you, guys. I'm going to China and and

610
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:35,240
Speaker 2: I'll update you, which we better be getting an update

611
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,359
Speaker 2: right here. Let's see update number five. I'm leaving my

612
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 2: life behind. I'm starting a new life. No more John,

613
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 2: no more Sarah, no more Tom, no one. I'm finally done.

614
00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,720
Speaker 2: Love that for you. My new life in China will

615
00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:50,159
Speaker 2: be easier. If anyone was wondering, I do speak Mandarin. Okay,

616
00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 2: well now we know exactly why. Okay, if he decided

617
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:55,800
Speaker 2: to go to China, Hina. Yeah, I'm half Chinese. I

618
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,200
Speaker 2: have a few friends in China to live with. John

619
00:27:58,240 --> 00:28:01,440
Speaker 2: has finally signed the papers. Over a course of six months,

620
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 2: the divorce will be finalized and settlings will be determined

621
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:07,760
Speaker 2: sometime next year. As of now, I'm on the airplane.

622
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:11,080
Speaker 2: Thank you. This is goodbye. For now. I will update

623
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 2: if I get messages from family members or friends. Goodbye,

624
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:17,639
Speaker 2: And that is the end of that story. She said.

625
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:25,800
Speaker 2: She said, no more drama, No more drama, no Tom, no,

626
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,679
Speaker 2: no Sarah. That's great.

627
00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, good for op of just like I don't need this,

628
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,000
Speaker 1: and again she did it, She did it.

629
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 2: With some like sass.

630
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 1: She's like, I put on my best gown, my best jewelry,

631
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:39,680
Speaker 1: my best dress, and you got served.

632
00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:43,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, that really is the best detailed. I love that

633
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 2: I made sure to be and look as nice as possible.

634
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:50,800
Speaker 2: Look in the little funeral. Hello everybody, Hello, Hi, can

635
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:54,280
Speaker 2: I have your attention? The consequences of John's actions are

636
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,560
Speaker 2: here now, and I'd like everyone to meet them. Thank you,

637
00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:00,440
Speaker 2: We love that. Op. Yeah, you joy your new life

638
00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 2: in China. John and Sarah could rot. Yes, send them

639
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 2: into the sun atmosphere. Maybe the moon for that. Now

640
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 2: the sun, We'll put them in the sun. Tom on

641
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 2: the moon. No, just Tom's fine. Tom's fine. Tom doesn't

642
00:29:12,400 --> 00:29:12,959
Speaker 2: have to go anywhere.

643
00:29:12,960 --> 00:29:14,560
Speaker 1: But that's the end of that story, guys, and the

644
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 1: end of that episode.

645
00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:17,360
Speaker 2: Hey, it's sam' your og host. Here. We're gonna get

646
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,040
Speaker 2: back to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads

647
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:23,160
Speaker 2: from our sponsors. My boyfriend refuses to attend my mother's

648
00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:27,880
Speaker 2: religious funeral. He said it's a violation of his beliefs.

649
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:31,360
Speaker 2: Believe in this you kind of, yeah, I believe that.

650
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 2: My twenty six female mom passed away a couple days ago.

651
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:39,080
Speaker 2: My boyfriend, thirty one male is refusing to go to

652
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:42,000
Speaker 2: the funeral or let my daughter go with me because

653
00:29:42,000 --> 00:29:45,040
Speaker 2: it's religious. Like the title says, I just lost my

654
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:48,680
Speaker 2: mom a couple days ago from ovarian cancer. I'm devastated

655
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,480
Speaker 2: right now, and my boyfriend we've been together for a

656
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:55,400
Speaker 2: year and a half, isn't helping me at all. Oh sorry, ophee.

657
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from user Mom's funeral on

658
00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:01,520
Speaker 2: the r slash okay story time sub reddit. So my

659
00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 2: mom and I weren't on good terms before her because

660
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,000
Speaker 2: of my boyfriend, John and my mom never got along

661
00:30:08,120 --> 00:30:10,960
Speaker 2: because he's a deep set atheist and my mom is

662
00:30:11,240 --> 00:30:15,040
Speaker 2: very religious. Major issues popped up once I got pregnant

663
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 2: and had my daughter. My mom pressed for me to

664
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:20,719
Speaker 2: have my baby baptized in the church, which I wanted

665
00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 2: to do, but John was set against it. He convinced

666
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:27,360
Speaker 2: me that baptizing her and indoctrinating her was a bad

667
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:29,480
Speaker 2: choice and that we should leave it to her to

668
00:30:29,560 --> 00:30:32,600
Speaker 2: choose when she was old enough. I agreed. My mom

669
00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:35,680
Speaker 2: didn't take this well at all, and after many angry

670
00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 2: and hurt arguments, she cut off contact with me. Not

671
00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:41,400
Speaker 2: having my mom with me during my pregnancy or my

672
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:44,200
Speaker 2: baby's birth took a big emotional toll on me, but

673
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 2: John insisted it was for the best and he didn't

674
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:49,920
Speaker 2: want my mom near my daughter at all, and that

675
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,760
Speaker 2: my mom was evil for hurting me. At the time,

676
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 2: I was angry, so I agreed. So far everyone in

677
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,440
Speaker 2: this story sixcept robe. I found out my mom was

678
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 2: sick with ovarian cancer a month go. When she called

679
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 2: me and wanted to talk, I was horrified, and all

680
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 2: of that BS kind of just fell away. I tried

681
00:31:07,680 --> 00:31:09,520
Speaker 2: to make the best of my time with her. I

682
00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:11,520
Speaker 2: brought my daughter to meet her grandma and tried to

683
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 2: build good memories with her. I'm happy to say we reconciled,

684
00:31:15,560 --> 00:31:17,640
Speaker 2: and my mom and I made peace with each other

685
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:21,560
Speaker 2: before she passed. Thank God. That's why I always advocate

686
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:24,240
Speaker 2: for not going no contact. I don't want to trash

687
00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:26,520
Speaker 2: my boyfriend, but John has been a pain in the

688
00:31:26,680 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 2: butt since I found out my mom was sick. He

689
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 2: said she deserved it, YO quickly backed down when he

690
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:37,200
Speaker 2: saw how angry that made me. He refused to go

691
00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 2: with me to visit or help care for my mom.

692
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:41,840
Speaker 2: He didn't even really want to listen to me talk

693
00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,200
Speaker 2: about how happy I was to reconnect with my mom.

694
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 2: All he did was remind me that my mom hurt

695
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:50,080
Speaker 2: me and I should have kept no contact with her,

696
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 2: and she didn't deserve for me to speak to her.

697
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 2: I told him that my mom isn't perfect, but my

698
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 2: mom also raised me by herself, and that she was

699
00:31:57,560 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 2: my rock for many years and he should respect that.

700
00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:02,959
Speaker 2: He said nothing outside telling me that there was no

701
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:05,680
Speaker 2: value in talking to her. Now we're planning the funeral,

702
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:09,240
Speaker 2: I asked John to go with me and he refused instantly.

703
00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:12,320
Speaker 2: He said he hated my mom and that she was

704
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 2: a whuhah to our family, and that he wasn't going

705
00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:20,360
Speaker 2: to church ever. And it was rude and insensitive of

706
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 2: me to even ask. When I said I was taking

707
00:32:23,120 --> 00:32:26,960
Speaker 2: my daughter, he had the nerve to actually tell me

708
00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:30,520
Speaker 2: that I was not under any circumstances taking her.

709
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,840
Speaker 1: Why is he so again on that train of like

710
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:35,760
Speaker 1: this is literally the devil.

711
00:32:35,840 --> 00:32:37,920
Speaker 2: I don't mean to generalize it, but it feels like

712
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,800
Speaker 2: this guy, well, I shouldn't generalize it. I guess I

713
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:42,680
Speaker 2: want to say it's because he's like an atheist and

714
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,320
Speaker 2: he's just like so like I refuse to let my

715
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,440
Speaker 2: daughter be exposed to like religion. But it's like that's

716
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,880
Speaker 2: doing the I think there's this whole thing that he

717
00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:52,400
Speaker 2: was doing. He was like, well, I don't want to

718
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 2: expose our daughter to this. I want her to be

719
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:57,840
Speaker 2: able to choose. But now at the same time, you're like,

720
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:01,200
Speaker 2: I don't want my daughter exposed to anything except like

721
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 2: completely secular beliefs because that's what I believe in. So

722
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:09,840
Speaker 2: he's actually actively trying to influence the daughter into being

723
00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:11,000
Speaker 2: atheists hundred percent.

724
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 1: What's really getting at me is Opie's mom just passed away,

725
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:19,680
Speaker 1: and you're just like kind of piling it on op like, oh, mom,

726
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:23,200
Speaker 1: don't go, or you don't take my daughter, don't take

727
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:23,680
Speaker 1: our daughter.

728
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:26,200
Speaker 2: You. Yeah, it's just like your mom's and now she's

729
00:33:26,280 --> 00:33:28,480
Speaker 2: and she still sicks and I don't like her. It's like, dude,

730
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,680
Speaker 2: stop a little bit of compassion. There's a little bit.

731
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 2: There's just a little bit, just a shred of compassion.

732
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:36,000
Speaker 2: Like I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That's it. He's making this

733
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 2: all about him.

734
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 1: It is very narcissistic, and I want to kick him

735
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:39,240
Speaker 1: in the face.

736
00:33:39,440 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 2: Yeah. Anyway, I have been through an emotional rollercoaster this

737
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:46,400
Speaker 2: past week. I lost my mom after we finally made up.

738
00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:50,200
Speaker 2: My boyfriend has been stupidly unsupportive, and now he's refusing

739
00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:53,000
Speaker 2: to let me take my child to her grandmother's funeral

740
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 2: and refusing to come to at least support me. My

741
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:57,960
Speaker 2: daughter is the one thing that brings me comfort and

742
00:33:58,000 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 2: I want her with me. Is that so unreasonable? It

743
00:34:01,720 --> 00:34:03,640
Speaker 2: seems like the more I push, the more he digs

744
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 2: his heels in, and I just can't take it anymore.

745
00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:09,040
Speaker 2: I don't know what to do. His attitude towards this

746
00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:12,080
Speaker 2: entire thing is breaking my heart. On top of my

747
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:14,759
Speaker 2: mom's death. And we do have an update. I think

748
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:18,080
Speaker 2: we've set our piece to literally leave this man. Thanks

749
00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:20,399
Speaker 2: to everyone that sent me condolences about my mom. It's

750
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:22,879
Speaker 2: been really hard these past several days, but I've been

751
00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:26,240
Speaker 2: hanging in there, okay. I tried being reasonable to John

752
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 2: about how he wanted to handle things. I even told him,

753
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:32,440
Speaker 2: like one poster here suggested that he didn't have to

754
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,480
Speaker 2: go to the service, but could wait in the lobby

755
00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:36,839
Speaker 2: with my daughter while the service was going on, and

756
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:39,400
Speaker 2: then she could spend time with my family after the service,

757
00:34:39,680 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 2: But he again shot it down. He would be able

758
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:45,239
Speaker 2: to hear the service, and that was a quote, violation

759
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,760
Speaker 2: of his beliefs and asking to compromise on those beliefs

760
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:52,959
Speaker 2: was unconscionable and unfair to our daughter. Who is this guy?

761
00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 2: Just a selfish, selfish guy. He's standing on business for

762
00:34:55,920 --> 00:34:59,040
Speaker 2: his beliefs, which, like you know, is not necessarily a

763
00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,960
Speaker 2: negative personality. No, but it is in the context of

764
00:35:02,239 --> 00:35:04,879
Speaker 2: standing on your beliefs, like and then shoving it down

765
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:08,640
Speaker 2: of your your spouse's mother passes. This has nothing to

766
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:08,920
Speaker 2: do me.

767
00:35:09,200 --> 00:35:11,360
Speaker 1: This is like, this is a ceremony, and it's like

768
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:12,960
Speaker 1: show some respects.

769
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what. I think the phrase that is

770
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 2: most appropriate for the situation is get up, grow up,

771
00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:20,719
Speaker 2: Get up, dude, grow up. A lot of people don't

772
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:23,279
Speaker 2: like to throw that around, but dude, get up. In

773
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 2: this situation, you shouldn't care if you're atheist, you shouldn't

774
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:28,160
Speaker 2: care if you're religious. You should just care that your

775
00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 2: wife is going through her mother passing and you need

776
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:32,120
Speaker 2: to be able to be there for it.

777
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:34,440
Speaker 1: And the fact that Opie's trying to compromise I at

778
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,240
Speaker 1: least compromise for her own mother's funeral.

779
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:40,000
Speaker 2: It's crazy. This guy's gotta go. I told him that

780
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:42,880
Speaker 2: I had had it. Yes, This is the icing on

781
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,719
Speaker 2: a very large cake. I told John that as of

782
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 2: this week, I wanted our bake accounts separated. He made

783
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 2: us joint accounts to make sure that we split everything

784
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 2: equally to be fair, despite me making more than him,

785
00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:57,000
Speaker 2: and that I'd be staying with my brother after the

786
00:35:57,040 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 2: funeral while we figured out what to do. Whether that

787
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:02,799
Speaker 2: was a total breakup or counseling, it was up to him.

788
00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:05,759
Speaker 2: He said counseling was for the weak minded, and that

789
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:09,520
Speaker 2: we were staying together despite my empty threats, and there

790
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:11,759
Speaker 2: was no way in f he was letting me take

791
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 2: his money. He became very loud and in my face

792
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,560
Speaker 2: during this conversation, so I just let him throw his

793
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:20,719
Speaker 2: tantrum until he took my silence as agreement. I took

794
00:36:20,760 --> 00:36:23,080
Speaker 2: my daughter with me to the viewing with no problems.

795
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 2: John and I barely spoke that day, which was fine

796
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:29,040
Speaker 2: by me, But it hit the fan the next day.

797
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:31,160
Speaker 2: When I got up in the morning to get myself

798
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:33,799
Speaker 2: ready and get my daughter ready, I discovered that he

799
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:38,240
Speaker 2: had the mother effing gall to park his car directly

800
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:42,040
Speaker 2: behind mine, blocking me into the driveway. I had no

801
00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:44,160
Speaker 2: way to get to the funeral in my own car.

802
00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:46,920
Speaker 2: John always drives to work, but for reasons I can

803
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:49,960
Speaker 2: only imagine, were to get back at me, decided to

804
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:53,160
Speaker 2: take the Metro and took the baby carriage in bottles

805
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:54,399
Speaker 2: and my pump with him.

806
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,960
Speaker 1: Dude, you are actually a monster.

807
00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:59,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, this guy is maybe one of the worst people

808
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:01,400
Speaker 2: I've ever heard in my life. This is a grown

809
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:04,720
Speaker 2: man child. My brother and I have our differences. Granted,

810
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:07,040
Speaker 2: in fact, we haven't talked much since my mom and

811
00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:10,040
Speaker 2: I were estranged. We started talking again after she was sick.

812
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:13,239
Speaker 2: But he'll forever be a saint to me for what

813
00:37:13,440 --> 00:37:16,640
Speaker 2: he did. I called him crying and he and my

814
00:37:16,719 --> 00:37:20,640
Speaker 2: sister in law arrived within twenty minute. W brother sister

815
00:37:20,680 --> 00:37:22,560
Speaker 2: in law calmed me down and helped me get my

816
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:25,640
Speaker 2: daughter ready, and they brought along spare bottles, a carrier,

817
00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:28,160
Speaker 2: and a breast pump. Thanks to them, I was able

818
00:37:28,160 --> 00:37:30,360
Speaker 2: to go to my mother's funeral in comfort, and my

819
00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 2: daughter was an angel during the service. They calmed me

820
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:36,480
Speaker 2: down and everything went perfectly. And even though I was

821
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:38,799
Speaker 2: a mess most of the day, having my daughter with

822
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:41,120
Speaker 2: me and my sister in law and even my brother

823
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:44,520
Speaker 2: with me to lean on gave me peace on the inside.

824
00:37:44,560 --> 00:37:46,719
Speaker 2: And by the way, you can find your piece by

825
00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 2: joining us live on YouTube, Twitch, and Facebook every weekday

826
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 2: at three pm PST. Just tap our profile, tap it,

827
00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:57,080
Speaker 2: tap it. I wish that there was like, this guy

828
00:37:57,160 --> 00:38:00,279
Speaker 2: is so just awful. I wish that they're there could

829
00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:02,359
Speaker 2: be a criminal action taken against him.

830
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:05,239
Speaker 1: What is the mindset behind all of this? What is

831
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 1: this going to bring you? Oh, you're not gonna do

832
00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:10,040
Speaker 1: those empty threats. I don't care. I'm gonna stop you

833
00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: from going to the funeral.

834
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:13,319
Speaker 2: I don't care. I think this guy is just so.

835
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:15,799
Speaker 2: I don't know if he's a narcissist or if he's

836
00:38:15,840 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 2: just He's clearly incredibly self centered. Where did this come from? Though?

837
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 2: It feels like he's just trying to win. He's like,

838
00:38:21,719 --> 00:38:24,200
Speaker 2: I won, I figured out the universe. I understand how

839
00:38:24,280 --> 00:38:26,320
Speaker 2: the universe works, and I know I'm right. I'm winning

840
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:27,880
Speaker 2: with our daughter. I won't let her be really just

841
00:38:27,880 --> 00:38:28,920
Speaker 2: like my partner.

842
00:38:28,920 --> 00:38:30,680
Speaker 1: Also, he seems like he doesn't believe in anything. He

843
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,640
Speaker 1: doesn't believe in therapy or counseling. He was like, therapy

844
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:34,720
Speaker 1: is for the weak minded.

845
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:38,240
Speaker 2: We glazed over that one therapy for the weak minded? Dude?

846
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:41,120
Speaker 2: This guy is a brick wall, and I wanna just

847
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:45,080
Speaker 2: walk away a closed minded turd sandwich this guy. Let's

848
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:48,600
Speaker 2: finish it up. I hope to God that she leaves

849
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:51,440
Speaker 2: this guy. That's the most reasonable option. I've made up

850
00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:58,040
Speaker 2: my mind not to tolerate john insane and controlling behavior anymore. Wow, WHOA,

851
00:38:58,120 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 2: let's go ope. He had a hit of excuses for

852
00:39:01,320 --> 00:39:03,759
Speaker 2: doing what he did. He even tried to claim his

853
00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 2: car had problems, and I don't want to hear any

854
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:08,319
Speaker 2: of them. I never wanted to be a single mom.

855
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:10,880
Speaker 2: I always wanted to raise my baby within a family,

856
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 2: but I've decided that going alone is so much better

857
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:17,560
Speaker 2: than doing it with this man who thought nothing of

858
00:39:17,680 --> 00:39:20,920
Speaker 2: trying to kick me while I was down. My brothers

859
00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:22,799
Speaker 2: arranged for me to talk to a friend of his

860
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 2: that specializes in family law this week, and we're taking

861
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:29,120
Speaker 2: it from there. Let's go. Yes. I still feel so

862
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:31,960
Speaker 2: guilty for what happened with my mom. I miss her

863
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:34,520
Speaker 2: so much. I hope from here on out I can

864
00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:36,799
Speaker 2: make her proud of me despite my mistakes.

865
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,560
Speaker 1: I'm proud of you. I'm proud of OPI literally just

866
00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:41,919
Speaker 1: like not sticking with it. I'm done, I know because

867
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:44,520
Speaker 1: OPI had was not so much on their plate, but

868
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:47,400
Speaker 1: with your mother passing away, it's hard, especially in the moment.

869
00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 1: Opie did it very quickly. Usually it's like for all

870
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 1: those emotions and to really get your mind back on track.

871
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,080
Speaker 1: I'm very happy that you did it as soon as possible.

872
00:39:57,360 --> 00:39:59,440
Speaker 2: And uh, before we do finish the story, we do

873
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:02,800
Speaker 2: have some roma comments here, jan Getta. I'm so sorry

874
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:04,640
Speaker 2: that you're going through this right now, and I'm so

875
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,240
Speaker 2: glad you have the support of a family behind you.

876
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:09,799
Speaker 2: Your daughter is far better off without someone like this

877
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:12,000
Speaker 2: as a role model for what she should look for

878
00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:14,640
Speaker 2: in life, and I'm glad you're getting out of this situation.

879
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:16,719
Speaker 2: I would call the bank to see what you can

880
00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,480
Speaker 2: do about the joint account before he tries something like

881
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:22,080
Speaker 2: cleaning it out and putting it somewhere else as well.

882
00:40:22,480 --> 00:40:24,600
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry and I wish you all the best.

883
00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 2: I think we all reflect the same sentiment here. Yeah.

884
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:30,360
Speaker 2: Ohp he responds, I still have my personal account, so

885
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:32,719
Speaker 2: I called the bank and set up a meeting for tomorrow.

886
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:35,839
Speaker 2: I'm documenting that I've told John not to touch any

887
00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:38,319
Speaker 2: of the money in the account until everything has worked out.

888
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 2: I agree he's so toxic. John has good points and

889
00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:44,960
Speaker 2: I do love him, but I can't forgive the way

890
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:47,279
Speaker 2: he went out of his way to spikee me during

891
00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:49,799
Speaker 2: this whole thing. That's not love at all. He was

892
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:50,640
Speaker 2: spiting you.

893
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:54,360
Speaker 1: This was pure hatred on all accounts. Like there again,

894
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:57,319
Speaker 1: I think she said it best. Ope was he did

895
00:40:57,360 --> 00:40:58,399
Speaker 1: nothing but kick me down.

896
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, he kicked He stomped you. He lit you on

897
00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:03,839
Speaker 2: fire just so he could spit on you to put

898
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:06,440
Speaker 2: it out. Just a disgusting person, and really quick. And

899
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:09,280
Speaker 2: an update on the money situation for everyone that's worried.

900
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:11,600
Speaker 2: He didn't get his hands on my money. I went

901
00:41:11,640 --> 00:41:13,560
Speaker 2: straight to the bank and got the amount of my

902
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 2: last check out of the account. Whoo yeah, thank god.

903
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,400
Speaker 2: I don't want him touch in any of your money.

904
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:21,800
Speaker 2: And that is the end of that story. My boyfriend

905
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 2: won't establish boundaries with his female best friend, so I

906
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:31,160
Speaker 2: called off our engagement from boyfriend to just end. Yes.

907
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:35,360
Speaker 2: Me twenty seven female, and my fiance, twenty five male,

908
00:41:35,560 --> 00:41:38,239
Speaker 2: who we will call Riker, have known each other a

909
00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:41,000
Speaker 2: long time. In the long time that we've been in

910
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 2: each other's lives, my wonderful fiance has always had a

911
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:48,560
Speaker 2: single female friend. We will call her Jade twenty three female.

912
00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:51,120
Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from user thought Ty on

913
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:55,520
Speaker 2: the r slash okay storytime s about it. So as background,

914
00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:58,839
Speaker 2: Jade and Riker went to high school together, so they've

915
00:41:58,880 --> 00:42:01,840
Speaker 2: known each other longer. The problem is not that a

916
00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:04,839
Speaker 2: female has known my fiance longer. The problem is that

917
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:08,040
Speaker 2: Riiker and Jade used to date in high school. Oh,

918
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:10,680
Speaker 2: high school, for most people is old news and all

919
00:42:10,719 --> 00:42:13,560
Speaker 2: that jazz. In my opinion, people in high school are

920
00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:16,640
Speaker 2: mature enough to develop long term bonds with people. My

921
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:19,319
Speaker 2: friends from high school are a prime example of that.

922
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:23,480
Speaker 2: But whatever, Riiker and Jade dated for about a year.

923
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:26,839
Speaker 2: Riiker realized that he didn't want to date anymore and

924
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:30,480
Speaker 2: broke things off with Jade, but Jade went and dated

925
00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:35,240
Speaker 2: Riker's identical twin brother. Jade, from what I've been told,

926
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,759
Speaker 2: did not want to let Riker go, so she got

927
00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:42,080
Speaker 2: the next best thing, the mirror image the Striker. Things

928
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:45,239
Speaker 2: didn't end well between Riiker's twin and Jade, who we

929
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:48,680
Speaker 2: again are calling Striker, so they went no contact for

930
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:52,040
Speaker 2: many years until Riiker and Jade talked again during COVID.

931
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:56,480
Speaker 2: Now onto the present day, Riiker asks Jade opinion on

932
00:42:56,600 --> 00:42:59,880
Speaker 2: many things, including my engagement ring. I have never met Ja,

933
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:03,080
Speaker 2: nor have I ever talked to her. To me, Jade's

934
00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:06,000
Speaker 2: opinion doesn't matter and she shouldn't even be asked for

935
00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:09,960
Speaker 2: her opinion, right. Riiker has three older sisters who know me,

936
00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 2: so they should really be the ones that Riker asks. Anyway,

937
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:16,680
Speaker 2: Riiker and Jade talk basically every day, and most of

938
00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 2: the time it's at night. O. Wait, this is like

939
00:43:19,040 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 2: a huge red flag. Yeah, it's problematic because Riiker and

940
00:43:22,120 --> 00:43:24,120
Speaker 2: I will be spending time together, but then he'll be

941
00:43:24,239 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 2: texting back and forth with Jade to make things worse.

942
00:43:27,760 --> 00:43:30,279
Speaker 2: Jade has been single for quite some time now and

943
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:34,279
Speaker 2: only posts thirsty picks on her Instagram. Before you come

944
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 2: for me, I am all about a good thirst trap.

945
00:43:37,040 --> 00:43:40,359
Speaker 2: We can all use that confidence boost. But Jade will

946
00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:42,960
Speaker 2: tell Riker that she posted a new pick and he

947
00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:46,000
Speaker 2: will like it. Recently, we had a fight because Reiker

948
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 2: asked me in the past to stop talking to a

949
00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,279
Speaker 2: guy friend that had voiced his feelings for me. I

950
00:43:51,360 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 2: didn't hesitate. My life partner will be Riiker, so there's

951
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:58,360
Speaker 2: no point in entertaining another mail. However, when I asked

952
00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:00,680
Speaker 2: for Riiker to stop talking to Jay. He made the

953
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:03,560
Speaker 2: excuse that Jade is like a sister to him, that

954
00:44:03,680 --> 00:44:07,239
Speaker 2: you dated, Bro, you don't date your sister. Riker views

955
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:09,719
Speaker 2: Jade as a younger sister and will not give up

956
00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:13,200
Speaker 2: family to avoid continuing to argue about something I settled

957
00:44:13,239 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 2: for him talking to her. But she is banned and

958
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 2: not welcome in our house or our wedding. Am I

959
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:23,120
Speaker 2: overreacting and making something out of nothing? I need advice,

960
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:26,239
Speaker 2: and we do have an edit. I think you've already compromised.

961
00:44:26,440 --> 00:44:29,080
Speaker 2: You're free to have a relationship or a friendship with

962
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:32,439
Speaker 2: this person, but not in our house, and she will

963
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:34,640
Speaker 2: not be at the wedding. I think he's taking full

964
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:35,279
Speaker 2: advantage of that.

965
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 1: He's like, oh, you didn't specify, So I'm going to

966
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: talk to her every day, every hour as much as

967
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:42,400
Speaker 1: I can.

968
00:44:42,680 --> 00:44:46,560
Speaker 2: That's not you know, That's fine, right, Riker's pushing the envelope. Yes,

969
00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 2: you didn't say I couldn't do that. Well, let's see

970
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:51,239
Speaker 2: what's in this edit. For the people that have said

971
00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:54,840
Speaker 2: I'm being childish for not meeting Jade, I have tried

972
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:57,560
Speaker 2: to meet this friend. I've tried to follow her socials

973
00:44:57,600 --> 00:44:59,759
Speaker 2: and meet face to face. But the handful of times

974
00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:02,880
Speaker 2: that I've tried, I've been shut down. My fiance has

975
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:05,360
Speaker 2: told me that Jade is too busy to meet me. Okay,

976
00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:08,880
Speaker 2: this is really weird. Oh really, So the girl who's

977
00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:11,640
Speaker 2: so obsessed with you she dates her twin brother happens

978
00:45:11,680 --> 00:45:15,120
Speaker 2: to be too busy to meet your fiance. This is weird.

979
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:18,359
Speaker 1: We're believing that this is really weird now, but it's

980
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:19,120
Speaker 1: always been weird.

981
00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:22,920
Speaker 2: But who is this woman? Who is this mysterious one enormous,

982
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:26,960
Speaker 2: like the biggest red flag, just red red flag.

983
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:28,879
Speaker 1: You can't meet her, but I can talk to her

984
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:30,400
Speaker 1: every minute of the day.

985
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:32,319
Speaker 2: But you can't meet her. I'm sure she doesn't want

986
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:34,200
Speaker 2: to meet this girl. I'm sure, if anything, she wants

987
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 2: to fight her to the I.

988
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:38,000
Speaker 1: Think it's both a collaboration of both Riker and Jade,

989
00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:40,839
Speaker 1: of just like this is our secret thing and this

990
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:42,920
Speaker 1: girl trist she's on the picture.

991
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:46,160
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, she's probably so delusional she doesn't even admit

992
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:49,400
Speaker 2: to herself that she exists. Op, she's like, Riker's not engaged,

993
00:45:49,520 --> 00:45:51,719
Speaker 2: Riker doesn't have a fiance, she can't follow me, She's

994
00:45:51,719 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 2: not real If she doesn't follow me. She's If anyone

995
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:57,520
Speaker 2: says fiance, it's me Jade. Edit number two. Yes, I

996
00:45:57,680 --> 00:46:00,359
Speaker 2: realized that the twin brother could very well be fabricing

997
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:03,240
Speaker 2: the next best thing part. However, one of the sisters

998
00:46:03,280 --> 00:46:05,600
Speaker 2: even said that she was surprised that Jade and Riiker

999
00:46:05,600 --> 00:46:08,759
Speaker 2: were even talking at a number three. As far as

1000
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:12,120
Speaker 2: wedding planning, not much progress so far, but yes, Riker

1001
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:14,759
Speaker 2: wants to invite Jade to the wedding so she can

1002
00:46:14,800 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 2: be there for the big day. Edit four. Twin brother

1003
00:46:18,760 --> 00:46:21,479
Speaker 2: and Riker talk every day, but not nearly as much

1004
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:24,479
Speaker 2: as he talks to Jade. The twin does not talk

1005
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:29,440
Speaker 2: to Jade at all. And here is the update the marriage,

1006
00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:33,879
Speaker 2: the engagement, the relationship is aw wow. Just like that

1007
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:39,640
Speaker 2: Riiker striked, we're striking against Riiker. I was reading a

1008
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:43,280
Speaker 2: lot of comments and finally woke up to the field

1009
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:46,440
Speaker 2: of red flags in front of me. This required a

1010
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 2: lot of backstory because I was not being one hundred

1011
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:51,759
Speaker 2: percent honest when I wrote my original post. I was

1012
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:54,360
Speaker 2: very anxious because I did not want friends or family

1013
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 2: to think negatively about the person I was planning on

1014
00:46:57,239 --> 00:47:00,279
Speaker 2: spending the rest of my life with. Big mistake. My

1015
00:47:00,440 --> 00:47:03,040
Speaker 2: wonderful friend, who spent the last three hours with me

1016
00:47:03,239 --> 00:47:06,160
Speaker 2: on the phone, is my savior. My friend pointed out

1017
00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:08,720
Speaker 2: that when people truly care about you, they won't allow

1018
00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:13,040
Speaker 2: you to do stupid things like get married to a psychopath.

1019
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:16,000
Speaker 2: W friend, I don't know if Riker's a psychopath, but

1020
00:47:16,080 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 2: he certainly is a level seven weenie.

1021
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,040
Speaker 1: This guy, this guy is well. I want to see

1022
00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:23,880
Speaker 1: the reasoning what led up to this. I mean, we

1023
00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:26,200
Speaker 1: obviously know what it is, but there had to be

1024
00:47:26,320 --> 00:47:29,520
Speaker 1: a catalyst, like something exploded.

1025
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:32,480
Speaker 2: Riker and I had arguments, like all couples do, but

1026
00:47:32,840 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 2: every time we would disagree, Riker would accuse me of

1027
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 2: not loving him or caring about him. Classic guilt move.

1028
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:43,560
Speaker 2: I would sit there and wait until Riker was finished

1029
00:47:43,560 --> 00:47:46,879
Speaker 2: accusing me of lying, being toxic, and gaslighting me into

1030
00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:50,200
Speaker 2: believing that everything wrong in the relationship was my fault

1031
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:53,279
Speaker 2: without fail. When we had a disagreement, this would be

1032
00:47:53,360 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 2: Riker's default response. I would argue that I did love him,

1033
00:47:57,280 --> 00:47:59,440
Speaker 2: and I did care for him, and I wanted a

1034
00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:02,440
Speaker 2: life together, but he would tell me I was lying

1035
00:48:02,560 --> 00:48:05,440
Speaker 2: and to shut up. Eventually, I learned to go with

1036
00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 2: the flow and just respond with okay. There was literally

1037
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:10,840
Speaker 2: no point in me arguing because he would turn it

1038
00:48:10,920 --> 00:48:11,960
Speaker 2: back on me anyway.

1039
00:48:12,280 --> 00:48:15,560
Speaker 1: This is nasty. This is like emotional abuse, a mental abuse.

1040
00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:18,319
Speaker 2: Like you're wrong, I'm right. You want to stand up

1041
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:20,279
Speaker 2: for yourself? Shut up? You don't agree with me? Is

1042
00:48:20,320 --> 00:48:21,920
Speaker 2: that because you hate me? Is that because you don't

1043
00:48:21,960 --> 00:48:25,080
Speaker 2: love me anymore? And you hate me? Yeah? Note I

1044
00:48:25,160 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 2: never accused Riker of anything remotely the same, which, in

1045
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:31,640
Speaker 2: hindsight tells me that no matter what I chose to

1046
00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:34,399
Speaker 2: do in those moments, he would always believe that I

1047
00:48:34,560 --> 00:48:37,200
Speaker 2: was not enough for him. Now, besties, I know that

1048
00:48:37,280 --> 00:48:40,279
Speaker 2: it was a toxic relationship because eventually I reached a

1049
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:42,920
Speaker 2: point in the mind game where I would believe Riker

1050
00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:45,480
Speaker 2: and believe. I would tell him I was done and

1051
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 2: that I hoped he found someone better than me. Every

1052
00:48:48,120 --> 00:48:50,839
Speaker 2: time I would run for the hills, Riker always found

1053
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:53,560
Speaker 2: a way to sound genuinely sorry and tell me that

1054
00:48:53,719 --> 00:48:57,120
Speaker 2: everything would be fine if I truly loved him. I

1055
00:48:57,160 --> 00:49:00,440
Speaker 2: am not perfect, and my crap certainly does not smell

1056
00:49:00,520 --> 00:49:05,360
Speaker 2: like roses. But Reiker doesn't smell like roses either. Riiker

1057
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,319
Speaker 2: did leave me a number of times too, because I

1058
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:10,600
Speaker 2: would bring an issue to his attention, and rather than

1059
00:49:10,640 --> 00:49:13,440
Speaker 2: talk things through, I would get the we are moving

1060
00:49:13,440 --> 00:49:17,200
Speaker 2: on from this topic, talk about something else. What I

1061
00:49:17,239 --> 00:49:21,080
Speaker 2: am embarrassed. I was truly living with rose colored contact

1062
00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:25,080
Speaker 2: lenses because I'm thinking back to all of this and cringing.

1063
00:49:25,719 --> 00:49:29,040
Speaker 2: Riiker loved to take my okay responses and turn them

1064
00:49:29,040 --> 00:49:31,759
Speaker 2: into ammunition as proof that I didn't love him and

1065
00:49:31,840 --> 00:49:35,480
Speaker 2: I was lying. Quote, you don't love me, You're always

1066
00:49:35,560 --> 00:49:38,160
Speaker 2: leaving and never fighting for this to work. You always

1067
00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:39,680
Speaker 2: run away. You're alive.

1068
00:49:39,840 --> 00:49:42,759
Speaker 1: Just from hearing that sentence, I am exhausted, and that's

1069
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:44,759
Speaker 1: the I'm not in this relationship, and that's the first

1070
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:46,280
Speaker 1: time I'm hearing this, and I'm exhausted.

1071
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 2: Furthermore, Riiker would frequently call me on the phone if

1072
00:49:49,960 --> 00:49:53,480
Speaker 2: we were not together and say nasty things all the time,

1073
00:49:54,040 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 2: always accusing me of being a liar and telling me

1074
00:49:56,600 --> 00:49:59,759
Speaker 2: that everything was my fault. Yes, besties. This meant that

1075
00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:02,600
Speaker 2: I I had no proof that he would say disgusting

1076
00:50:02,640 --> 00:50:05,759
Speaker 2: and disrespectful things to me. In later arguments, I would

1077
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:07,880
Speaker 2: tell him that he was always so mean to me,

1078
00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:11,760
Speaker 2: and he would demand proof. No proof, Well, then I'm lying.

1079
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:15,000
Speaker 2: I got smarter and started recording our phone arguments on

1080
00:50:15,040 --> 00:50:17,640
Speaker 2: my iPad. I agree that it was toxic to do that.

1081
00:50:17,960 --> 00:50:21,840
Speaker 2: I disagree that's not toxic. Re with Riker the following days,

1082
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:25,000
Speaker 2: always apologizing for being so toxic and being in the wrong.

1083
00:50:25,200 --> 00:50:28,280
Speaker 2: If anyone knows how these people work. Once I admitted fault,

1084
00:50:28,320 --> 00:50:31,000
Speaker 2: even though it really was not my fault, it suddenly

1085
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:33,520
Speaker 2: was always my fault. Anytime crap hit the fan, it

1086
00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:35,920
Speaker 2: was always my fault, right, Riker would not feel loved

1087
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 2: why Riker was leaving my fault for the relationship failing,

1088
00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:41,000
Speaker 2: And it went on and on and on. It was

1089
00:50:41,040 --> 00:50:45,560
Speaker 2: a mess. Riker would always block my accounts like Instagram, Discord, Steam, etc.

1090
00:50:45,920 --> 00:50:49,200
Speaker 2: And then eventually add me back. When Riker's brother asked

1091
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:52,040
Speaker 2: why we were always doing that, Riker told his brother

1092
00:50:52,080 --> 00:50:54,000
Speaker 2: that I have a lot of problems, but he was

1093
00:50:54,040 --> 00:50:56,200
Speaker 2: willing to forgive me. Lol.

1094
00:50:56,560 --> 00:50:59,640
Speaker 1: Okay, this guy is a psychopath. This is psychopathic behavior.

1095
00:50:59,719 --> 00:51:00,759
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1096
00:51:01,040 --> 00:51:03,879
Speaker 1: I'm flabbergasted is the word of the day right now.

1097
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:07,359
Speaker 1: I am flabbergasted and just all this behavior, and I

1098
00:51:07,400 --> 00:51:09,919
Speaker 1: know it kind of got to that state of oh

1099
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:11,960
Speaker 1: and this is fine, everything is fine, This is all normal.

1100
00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, none of this is normal.

1101
00:51:13,480 --> 00:51:16,319
Speaker 1: I'm very happy. Your friend was like, no, that's right,

1102
00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:20,080
Speaker 1: so far from normal. This is like the ultimate deflex shield. Yeah,

1103
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:22,600
Speaker 1: like this guy's the ultimate deflex shield, ultimate shield.

1104
00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:27,840
Speaker 2: Riker the Riker song. You're bad, you hate me, I'm perfect,

1105
00:51:28,120 --> 00:51:30,160
Speaker 2: you don't love me. You gotta work on it. I

1106
00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:32,760
Speaker 2: think a Riker needs to spend some time in Rikers

1107
00:51:33,200 --> 00:51:34,720
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying.

1108
00:51:34,920 --> 00:51:38,399
Speaker 2: Ship Riker off to Rikers prison. Anyway, there are many

1109
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,960
Speaker 2: more concerning behaviors. But all the above was just to

1110
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:44,040
Speaker 2: bring you to my breakup earlier. Tonight, I went to

1111
00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:46,960
Speaker 2: bring up the Jade conversation again because I was truly

1112
00:51:47,080 --> 00:51:51,760
Speaker 2: still uncomfortable about Riker's friendship with her. Riker kept brushing

1113
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:55,239
Speaker 2: me off and called me unreasonable because he is not

1114
00:51:55,400 --> 00:51:58,480
Speaker 2: a cheater. Note I have a mental illness diagnosis where

1115
00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:02,040
Speaker 2: I am usually at some level of paranoid. Riker said

1116
00:52:02,120 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 2: I was just letting my paranoia get the best of me,

1117
00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:06,919
Speaker 2: and to stop talking about Jade. He was never going

1118
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:09,399
Speaker 2: to drop her as a friend. Then, because I had

1119
00:52:09,440 --> 00:52:11,960
Speaker 2: not had dinner yet, Riker switched to telling me that

1120
00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:14,839
Speaker 2: I was just angry and taking out my anger on him.

1121
00:52:15,440 --> 00:52:18,320
Speaker 2: Riker said, I was always emotionally abusing him and treating

1122
00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:21,120
Speaker 2: him like he was a punching bag, and then thinking

1123
00:52:21,160 --> 00:52:23,239
Speaker 2: I would get away with it because I'm bipolar. It

1124
00:52:23,280 --> 00:52:26,920
Speaker 2: really feels like this guy identified Ope as someone he

1125
00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:29,640
Speaker 2: could be like in a relationship with and have control

1126
00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:32,799
Speaker 2: over every element that we've read so far, as him

1127
00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:36,880
Speaker 2: flipping everything around so that it's Ope's fault, so that

1128
00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:40,719
Speaker 2: it's actually the root cause of everything is Ope's feelings,

1129
00:52:40,760 --> 00:52:44,200
Speaker 2: Ope's actions. You are the problem. You are the issue. No,

1130
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:47,040
Speaker 2: my mental health is not an excuse or a scapegoat.

1131
00:52:47,120 --> 00:52:49,400
Speaker 2: I wish I knew of a way to include audio

1132
00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 2: from the phone call, because when I had my friend listen,

1133
00:52:51,800 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 2: she was horrified. So I told Riker I was truly

1134
00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:58,160
Speaker 2: done for real this time. I didn't want to do

1135
00:52:58,200 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 2: this toxic back and forth for the rest of my life,

1136
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:03,120
Speaker 2: and I definitely did not want to have a third

1137
00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:06,279
Speaker 2: wheel in our marriage. Reiker laughed at me and just

1138
00:53:06,360 --> 00:53:09,880
Speaker 2: told me I was effing ridiculous, so he hung up

1139
00:53:09,920 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 2: on me and went to play video games with his brother.

1140
00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:16,160
Speaker 2: Shortly after, Reiker turned off his location and read receipts

1141
00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:19,760
Speaker 2: before removing me from his social profiles. I just figured

1142
00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:21,919
Speaker 2: that this was a blessing in disguise, because I thought

1143
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:25,319
Speaker 2: this would be as clean of a breakup as possible. No,

1144
00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:28,840
Speaker 2: Reiker finished whatever game he was playing online and started

1145
00:53:29,120 --> 00:53:32,000
Speaker 2: blowing up my phone. At this point, I had also

1146
00:53:32,080 --> 00:53:34,279
Speaker 2: turned off my location because there was no reason for

1147
00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:36,839
Speaker 2: him to know anymore. Riker was telling me that I

1148
00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 2: turned off my location and read receipts first, and that's

1149
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:43,000
Speaker 2: why he did. First of all, Riiker wanted my location

1150
00:53:43,120 --> 00:53:45,360
Speaker 2: for safety, and he was sharing his to be fair.

1151
00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:48,319
Speaker 2: Looking back, it definitely was not for that purpose. This

1152
00:53:48,400 --> 00:53:51,120
Speaker 2: is like him realizing this is he's losing control. He's

1153
00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:54,040
Speaker 2: freaking out, deletes are off of all his profiles, and

1154
00:53:54,080 --> 00:53:56,480
Speaker 2: then it sinks in. He's like, no, no, no, no no,

1155
00:53:56,600 --> 00:53:58,080
Speaker 2: I don't know, no no, I don't have anyone to

1156
00:53:58,120 --> 00:54:02,840
Speaker 2: control anymore. Wait wait, I can't control my oh calling

1157
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:06,560
Speaker 2: me non stop and texting me to pick up or answer.

1158
00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:08,920
Speaker 2: I picked up and reached from my iPad so we

1159
00:54:08,960 --> 00:54:11,640
Speaker 2: could have the normal argument. Riker told me that I

1160
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:15,239
Speaker 2: was a efing psycho and he deserved better than some

1161
00:54:15,400 --> 00:54:19,040
Speaker 2: emotionally abusive bipolar, self victimizing woman like me, and then

1162
00:54:19,080 --> 00:54:21,239
Speaker 2: I better get my crap together or he would leave me.

1163
00:54:21,640 --> 00:54:24,480
Speaker 2: In short, the call ended like it normally does, where

1164
00:54:24,520 --> 00:54:26,759
Speaker 2: I said I was done, and Riker went on to

1165
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:29,640
Speaker 2: tell me, don't even bother blocking me because I never

1166
00:54:29,719 --> 00:54:32,160
Speaker 2: speak to you again. Why is that a normal conversation?

1167
00:54:33,320 --> 00:54:36,520
Speaker 2: Why is that a normal conversation? Okay, God, well, I

1168
00:54:36,600 --> 00:54:39,560
Speaker 2: did follow through this time with moral support with my friend,

1169
00:54:39,600 --> 00:54:42,880
Speaker 2: and I blocked all of his profiles, not before noticing

1170
00:54:42,920 --> 00:54:45,640
Speaker 2: that he had already unadded me but not blocked me.

1171
00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,479
Speaker 2: I guess that really pissed Riker off, because I got

1172
00:54:48,719 --> 00:54:52,360
Speaker 2: emails from Riker telling me that the relationship ending was

1173
00:54:52,440 --> 00:54:54,319
Speaker 2: all my fault and he deserved better than me, and

1174
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:57,120
Speaker 2: he's gonna be so much happier without me. Throw everything

1175
00:54:57,160 --> 00:54:59,399
Speaker 2: he ever got me away because I don't deserve them.

1176
00:54:59,760 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 2: I'm I'm not ready for a relationship, because I'm a

1177
00:55:01,719 --> 00:55:04,719
Speaker 2: terrible person. I don't deserve Riker. Why don't you go

1178
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:07,160
Speaker 2: ahead and look in the mirror and say all this stuff, Riker,

1179
00:55:07,200 --> 00:55:09,840
Speaker 2: because it's the only person you're gonna have to talk

1180
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:14,560
Speaker 2: to real Soon I am free of that toxic relationship

1181
00:55:14,560 --> 00:55:17,800
Speaker 2: and honestly haven't even cried yet. How does one process

1182
00:55:17,800 --> 00:55:20,920
Speaker 2: a roller coaster of this size in one evening? I

1183
00:55:20,920 --> 00:55:23,600
Speaker 2: don't feel like I'm respecting myself by feeling numb, But

1184
00:55:23,640 --> 00:55:26,799
Speaker 2: I also don't think crying is appropriate either. I did

1185
00:55:26,880 --> 00:55:29,720
Speaker 2: get asked if I'm faking it all for clickbait, But really,

1186
00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:33,840
Speaker 2: people like Riker exist and they don't get talked about enough.

1187
00:55:34,120 --> 00:55:37,960
Speaker 2: But we can talk about people like this guy all

1188
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:41,359
Speaker 2: day long, and you can watch us while we do it. Yeah,

1189
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:45,600
Speaker 2: when you join us live on Facebook, YouTube and Twitch

1190
00:55:45,920 --> 00:55:49,600
Speaker 2: at three pm PST every weekday, just tap our profile.

1191
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:53,480
Speaker 2: Tap it. Wow. Yeah, Like Op says, there are people

1192
00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:56,719
Speaker 2: that like exist that are like Riker. Yeah, I think

1193
00:55:56,920 --> 00:55:59,640
Speaker 2: stay strong, Op, you've left this guy. That was really

1194
00:55:59,840 --> 00:56:03,160
Speaker 2: the only possible solution to this is.

1195
00:56:03,719 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 1: I just love when again he's losing control, any sense

1196
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 1: of control.

1197
00:56:07,920 --> 00:56:09,000
Speaker 2: He's freaking out.

1198
00:56:09,080 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 1: He'll jump to one thing like oh yeah, we're done,

1199
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,360
Speaker 1: and then minutes later, no.

1200
00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:18,959
Speaker 2: No, though, this is your fault. This is your fault

1201
00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:22,799
Speaker 2: sending emails, dude emails. Since the original breakup, I have

1202
00:56:22,880 --> 00:56:26,600
Speaker 2: been nothing but nice in my correspondence with Riker, which, Wow,

1203
00:56:26,760 --> 00:56:28,799
Speaker 2: you didn't need to do that. But I mean, what

1204
00:56:28,840 --> 00:56:31,840
Speaker 2: an angel move on op wishing him the best and

1205
00:56:32,080 --> 00:56:36,200
Speaker 2: all that good stuff, but he has sent me vile emails,

1206
00:56:36,320 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 2: which is pretty on brand for him. I'm still confused

1207
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:42,280
Speaker 2: on my true feelings because I feel like I truly

1208
00:56:42,320 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 2: did love Riker, but his voice in my head continues

1209
00:56:45,200 --> 00:56:47,880
Speaker 2: to tell my brain that I'm lying. Maybe this post

1210
00:56:47,920 --> 00:56:50,399
Speaker 2: won't do my experience justice, but I know I'm going

1211
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:53,120
Speaker 2: to be fine. Riker got what he wanted in the end,

1212
00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:56,640
Speaker 2: a relationship with Jade, and I got my freedom. Wow.

1213
00:56:57,080 --> 00:57:01,400
Speaker 2: That shocking, shocking that he's dating the girl he claimed

1214
00:57:01,600 --> 00:57:06,200
Speaker 2: was his little sister. You'll do just another psycho thing

1215
00:57:06,280 --> 00:57:08,200
Speaker 2: to do. I'm not even gonna give him the cop out.

1216
00:57:08,200 --> 00:57:10,600
Speaker 2: He knew exactly what he felt about Jade, and he

1217
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:13,520
Speaker 2: was just trying to gaslight Ope into being okay with it.

1218
00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:15,319
Speaker 2: That's the end of that story. Yeah, Hey, it's John

1219
00:57:15,360 --> 00:57:17,120
Speaker 2: you og host here. We're gonna get back to the stories.

1220
00:57:17,120 --> 00:57:18,720
Speaker 2: But here's a quick three minute break of ass from

1221
00:57:18,720 --> 00:57:22,520
Speaker 2: our sponsors. My boyfriend's ex won't respect me in my

1222
00:57:22,680 --> 00:57:26,280
Speaker 2: own home, so I threatened to leave him. I hope

1223
00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:28,320
Speaker 2: you take your home with you. Does it have wheels?

1224
00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:31,200
Speaker 2: Let's find out out. I thirty five female, have been

1225
00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:34,640
Speaker 2: dating my boyfriend, forty five male for roughly eight months now.

1226
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,520
Speaker 2: In the initial stage of our relationship, he mentioned that

1227
00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:40,200
Speaker 2: he had an X who was also his best friend.

1228
00:57:40,320 --> 00:57:42,880
Speaker 2: He said it had been many years between them dating

1229
00:57:42,960 --> 00:57:46,080
Speaker 2: and that it lacked physical intimacy and was more platonic.

1230
00:57:46,480 --> 00:57:49,880
Speaker 2: I had no concerns, as I understand adult relationships can

1231
00:57:49,920 --> 00:57:52,880
Speaker 2: tend to turn into friendships. By the way, this comes

1232
00:57:52,920 --> 00:57:57,280
Speaker 2: from user midnight Express on the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

1233
00:57:57,600 --> 00:58:00,840
Speaker 2: So he mentioned his last relationships offered due to this

1234
00:58:00,880 --> 00:58:03,920
Speaker 2: friendship with his ex and said the last girlfriend tried

1235
00:58:03,920 --> 00:58:07,560
Speaker 2: to aggressively befriend his ex and that it wasn't organic

1236
00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:10,320
Speaker 2: and made things weird. About a month and a half

1237
00:58:10,400 --> 00:58:13,120
Speaker 2: into dating, he adopted a new cat and asked me

1238
00:58:13,200 --> 00:58:16,040
Speaker 2: to be there when the foster dropped him off. He

1239
00:58:16,160 --> 00:58:19,280
Speaker 2: mentioned that his ex best friend would also be there,

1240
00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:22,360
Speaker 2: which I was fine with. Upon arriving, the friend had

1241
00:58:22,400 --> 00:58:26,160
Speaker 2: recently been crying, made no eye contact, did not respond

1242
00:58:26,240 --> 00:58:29,320
Speaker 2: to any of my questions such as what show are

1243
00:58:29,360 --> 00:58:32,200
Speaker 2: you guys watching? Are you excited to meet the new cat?

1244
00:58:32,600 --> 00:58:35,880
Speaker 2: My partner texted me saying She's not trying to be rude,

1245
00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:38,640
Speaker 2: She's emotional. The foster dropped off the cat and I

1246
00:58:38,720 --> 00:58:41,760
Speaker 2: continued to make small attempts to get anything out of her.

1247
00:58:42,160 --> 00:58:44,520
Speaker 2: I heard, you also have cats, did you get them

1248
00:58:44,560 --> 00:58:47,800
Speaker 2: from when they were babies, where she replied yes and

1249
00:58:48,000 --> 00:58:51,560
Speaker 2: nothing more. The energy grew increasingly awkward, and my boyfriend

1250
00:58:51,640 --> 00:58:55,040
Speaker 2: suggested that we order food. I excused myself to run

1251
00:58:55,160 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 2: Errand's as it was not comfortable. The next day, I

1252
00:58:57,920 --> 00:58:59,960
Speaker 2: spoke with my partner and informed him that I was

1253
00:59:00,080 --> 00:59:02,600
Speaker 2: concerned with the fact she was emotional before meeting me

1254
00:59:03,080 --> 00:59:06,760
Speaker 2: and that the energy was toxic. Oh, she was just emotional.

1255
00:59:06,800 --> 00:59:10,480
Speaker 2: That ope exists. She pulled up and was like, I

1256
00:59:10,560 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 2: hate this person. I expressed that I didn't see healthy

1257
00:59:13,640 --> 00:59:16,920
Speaker 2: boundaries as he appeared to be coddling her behavior. I

1258
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:19,160
Speaker 2: informed him that it was a red flag for me

1259
00:59:19,480 --> 00:59:21,960
Speaker 2: and that I do my best to not entertain toxic

1260
00:59:22,080 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 2: energy in my personal life and definitely not in my relationships.

1261
00:59:25,760 --> 00:59:28,120
Speaker 2: In between this time, I find out that they had

1262
00:59:28,160 --> 00:59:31,200
Speaker 2: tickets to see a comedy show and also a hotel

1263
00:59:31,400 --> 00:59:35,400
Speaker 2: room in town for the duration of the comedy weekend.

1264
00:59:35,720 --> 00:59:38,280
Speaker 2: When I was made aware, I informed my partner that

1265
00:59:38,440 --> 00:59:42,480
Speaker 2: it felt completely inappropriate to be spending the night in

1266
00:59:42,560 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 2: a hotel with this friend slash X. He stated that

1267
00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:48,880
Speaker 2: he bought the tickets slash room well before we dated,

1268
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:52,200
Speaker 2: and he just hadn't changed the arrangements. There had been

1269
00:59:52,200 --> 00:59:55,200
Speaker 2: some back and forth on my comfort level, but ultimately

1270
00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 2: I forgave the situation as I knew that friendship was

1271
00:59:57,760 --> 01:00:01,560
Speaker 2: important to him. They continued to out as usual, watching

1272
01:00:01,640 --> 01:00:05,080
Speaker 2: shows at his place and ordering door Dash Fast forward,

1273
01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:07,680
Speaker 2: I move in with him. I was having issues with

1274
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:11,520
Speaker 2: my previous living situations and I was here every day anyway.

1275
01:00:11,800 --> 01:00:15,040
Speaker 2: She continues to come over and I make other plans.

1276
01:00:15,120 --> 01:00:18,520
Speaker 2: He suggests I stay and be around. I decided Friday

1277
01:00:18,560 --> 01:00:20,960
Speaker 2: to run some errands and come back home where they

1278
01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:24,680
Speaker 2: were already hanging out. I text him twenty minutes before

1279
01:00:24,760 --> 01:00:27,600
Speaker 2: heading home asked to pick up food for them, and

1280
01:00:27,640 --> 01:00:29,919
Speaker 2: then again when I parked in the driveway. I walk

1281
01:00:30,080 --> 01:00:33,120
Speaker 2: in the door and am immediately vocal. I ask them

1282
01:00:33,160 --> 01:00:36,280
Speaker 2: where they ordered food and what show they're watching. All

1283
01:00:36,320 --> 01:00:39,080
Speaker 2: I see is the back of her head on the couch.

1284
01:00:39,520 --> 01:00:42,880
Speaker 2: She does not turn around. My partner then hovers over

1285
01:00:42,920 --> 01:00:46,920
Speaker 2: the couch near her until she turns around. She half smirks,

1286
01:00:47,120 --> 01:00:50,720
Speaker 2: and I say, hey, Sarah, how's it going? No answer.

1287
01:00:51,040 --> 01:00:55,080
Speaker 2: She turns back around. What is this a ghost? Dude? Like? Sea?

1288
01:00:55,320 --> 01:00:56,520
Speaker 2: Is this the sixth sense?

1289
01:00:56,600 --> 01:00:56,680
Speaker 1: Like?

1290
01:00:56,760 --> 01:00:59,080
Speaker 2: Are you not even a real person? What is this?

1291
01:00:59,200 --> 01:01:03,240
Speaker 2: What's going on? Oh my god? Their food arrives and

1292
01:01:03,280 --> 01:01:06,000
Speaker 2: she gets up to eat, doesn't speak to meat or

1293
01:01:06,040 --> 01:01:09,480
Speaker 2: make eye contact. I had already eaten, so I stated

1294
01:01:09,520 --> 01:01:12,280
Speaker 2: I would be going upstairs to watch some true crime.

1295
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:15,960
Speaker 2: They hung out for several hours and then she left.

1296
01:01:16,360 --> 01:01:18,920
Speaker 2: My partner let me know she left, and we watched

1297
01:01:18,960 --> 01:01:22,120
Speaker 2: some TV before bed. I lost sleep that night, wrapping

1298
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:25,800
Speaker 2: my head around the situation and how disrespectful I found

1299
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:29,640
Speaker 2: it to be. For now the second time meeting this person,

1300
01:01:29,920 --> 01:01:33,200
Speaker 2: this friendship had created so much turmoil for months due

1301
01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:36,640
Speaker 2: to the disrespect, except now this time it happened in

1302
01:01:36,920 --> 01:01:40,160
Speaker 2: our home. I asked how he thought the interaction went,

1303
01:01:40,280 --> 01:01:43,640
Speaker 2: and he broke down and said, I'm very disappointed by

1304
01:01:43,640 --> 01:01:46,600
Speaker 2: my friend. She couldn't even pretend to be nice to

1305
01:01:46,680 --> 01:01:49,960
Speaker 2: you when you were as sweet as can be. Well, okay,

1306
01:01:50,120 --> 01:01:51,240
Speaker 2: then why didn't you say that?

1307
01:01:51,360 --> 01:01:54,000
Speaker 1: Thank God he's at least aware of it, right, Why

1308
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:56,400
Speaker 1: were you with her for seven hours, it didn't come back.

1309
01:01:56,480 --> 01:02:00,560
Speaker 2: Hey, buddy, get a backbone. Press your friend on this stuff.

1310
01:02:00,600 --> 01:02:05,560
Speaker 2: When she's outwardly disrespectful of your girlfriend, I think again,

1311
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:08,919
Speaker 2: is OPI a ghost? Yeah? The fact there's like, hey,

1312
01:02:09,240 --> 01:02:11,640
Speaker 2: what's you watching? No, what you're doing, what's you eating?

1313
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:14,600
Speaker 2: I don't think OPI's a ghost. I think her boyfriend's

1314
01:02:14,920 --> 01:02:18,560
Speaker 2: little ex bestie is a charlatan.

1315
01:02:18,800 --> 01:02:22,120
Speaker 1: Second time you're meeting someone and they don't respond to

1316
01:02:22,160 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 1: you with not even a turnaround.

1317
01:02:23,880 --> 01:02:26,560
Speaker 2: I expressed why I was so upset with the situation,

1318
01:02:26,640 --> 01:02:29,760
Speaker 2: and he agreed that she was disrespectful. The weekend passed

1319
01:02:29,760 --> 01:02:32,520
Speaker 2: and we continued to talk on the situation, and more

1320
01:02:32,640 --> 01:02:35,400
Speaker 2: hurt came up, where now I felt my partner did

1321
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:38,560
Speaker 2: not have my back immediately when she did not interact

1322
01:02:38,600 --> 01:02:41,120
Speaker 2: with me in our home. He continued to hang out

1323
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:44,640
Speaker 2: with her versus speaking up on her behavior. Additionally, I

1324
01:02:44,760 --> 01:02:47,440
Speaker 2: expressed that I was disappointed that I had to approach

1325
01:02:47,480 --> 01:02:50,440
Speaker 2: my partner on the topic versus him taking charge of

1326
01:02:50,440 --> 01:02:53,919
Speaker 2: the situation. The situation caused a lot of friction as

1327
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:56,800
Speaker 2: she mentioned seeing things in the house and being jealous

1328
01:02:57,240 --> 01:03:00,840
Speaker 2: of the life that he and I were building. Upon

1329
01:03:00,960 --> 01:03:04,880
Speaker 2: learning that information. I ultimately stated, quote, I am not

1330
01:03:05,040 --> 01:03:07,160
Speaker 2: willing to be in a relationship where this type of

1331
01:03:07,200 --> 01:03:11,439
Speaker 2: behavior is acceptable boundaries. Hey, I don't like you hanging

1332
01:03:11,440 --> 01:03:14,120
Speaker 2: out with this woman who clearly wishes that she could

1333
01:03:14,160 --> 01:03:16,360
Speaker 2: be me. He just wants it to be normal, and

1334
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:21,520
Speaker 2: she clearly is fantasizing about being ope in this situation.

1335
01:03:21,680 --> 01:03:24,440
Speaker 1: If my friend was like that, I might in that friendship,

1336
01:03:24,520 --> 01:03:25,640
Speaker 1: especially if I talk to them.

1337
01:03:25,880 --> 01:03:28,760
Speaker 2: But dude, that's it. Well, I think at this point

1338
01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:31,680
Speaker 2: now that he's like, yeah, that was unacceptable of her.

1339
01:03:31,720 --> 01:03:33,960
Speaker 2: It's like, you have to sit this friend down and

1340
01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:35,840
Speaker 2: have a talk with her, be like, do you want

1341
01:03:35,840 --> 01:03:36,280
Speaker 2: to date me?

1342
01:03:36,400 --> 01:03:38,160
Speaker 1: If you want to date your beef with oh? Yeah, Like,

1343
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:39,760
Speaker 1: why are you so weird?

1344
01:03:40,080 --> 01:03:42,240
Speaker 2: He still has the feelings for me, then we can't

1345
01:03:42,280 --> 01:03:44,360
Speaker 2: continue that. Yeah, and he shouldn't say that because then

1346
01:03:44,360 --> 01:03:46,959
Speaker 2: that gives her the opportunity to manipulate and lie. Yeah.

1347
01:03:47,000 --> 01:03:49,120
Speaker 1: This shouldn't be petty. We shouldn't be in high school.

1348
01:03:49,240 --> 01:03:51,120
Speaker 1: This is adulthood. Let's be adults.

1349
01:03:51,320 --> 01:03:53,720
Speaker 2: He asked me to clarify my statement, and I stated,

1350
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:57,600
Speaker 2: this friendship has caused many issues in our relationship. I

1351
01:03:57,680 --> 01:04:00,600
Speaker 2: am not willing to continue this if this friendship is

1352
01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:04,120
Speaker 2: still on the table. He agreed and informed her that

1353
01:04:04,160 --> 01:04:07,160
Speaker 2: they will no longer be continuing to be friends. There

1354
01:04:07,200 --> 01:04:10,520
Speaker 2: you go, there you go. I don't think it's that easy.

1355
01:04:10,600 --> 01:04:13,360
Speaker 2: OPI wins. I want op to win, but I don't

1356
01:04:13,360 --> 01:04:14,800
Speaker 2: think that's gonna be that easy. I think it is.

1357
01:04:14,840 --> 01:04:16,680
Speaker 2: I think he said it's over, it's done. I'm cutting

1358
01:04:16,680 --> 01:04:18,880
Speaker 2: her off. You're right, it's over. But you know what,

1359
01:04:18,880 --> 01:04:20,600
Speaker 2: it'll never be over you joining us when we go

1360
01:04:20,680 --> 01:04:24,760
Speaker 2: live every weekday on YouTube, Facebook and Twitch at three PMPSD.

1361
01:04:24,800 --> 01:04:26,520
Speaker 2: All you gotta do is tap our profile. Got it?

1362
01:04:26,600 --> 01:04:29,600
Speaker 1: And we won't ignore you like that weird friend.

1363
01:04:29,840 --> 01:04:32,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, we will not ignore you. Yeah. So I'm fully

1364
01:04:32,960 --> 01:04:36,640
Speaker 2: in the camp of I mean, OPI is one situation.

1365
01:04:36,920 --> 01:04:40,400
Speaker 2: OPI is winning, Okay, I mean maybe because Opie's boyfriend

1366
01:04:40,440 --> 01:04:42,800
Speaker 2: is like forty five, maybe he's at a point where

1367
01:04:42,840 --> 01:04:44,920
Speaker 2: it's like it took him so long to realize that

1368
01:04:44,920 --> 01:04:47,480
Speaker 2: that was toxic, because even he was like, there's no

1369
01:04:47,520 --> 01:04:49,240
Speaker 2: way that she's actually acting like that, right.

1370
01:04:49,480 --> 01:04:53,120
Speaker 1: The relationship is still pretty new. Eight months is fairly

1371
01:04:53,160 --> 01:04:55,680
Speaker 1: new for our relationship, and maybe he just wasn't used

1372
01:04:55,680 --> 01:04:59,200
Speaker 1: to it and didn't see that context before and see

1373
01:04:59,200 --> 01:05:02,360
Speaker 1: how they acted the friend and seeing with OP, he

1374
01:05:02,440 --> 01:05:04,360
Speaker 1: was like, that is very odd behavior.

1375
01:05:04,560 --> 01:05:06,880
Speaker 2: Now there is a little bit left, let's finish this off. Ohp,

1376
01:05:06,880 --> 01:05:11,000
Speaker 2: he's winning. I believe others' actions speak for themselves, and

1377
01:05:11,040 --> 01:05:14,240
Speaker 2: I traditionally do not believe in ultimatums. I don't think

1378
01:05:14,320 --> 01:05:17,680
Speaker 2: it's healthy. Outside of this issue with the friend, we've

1379
01:05:17,720 --> 01:05:23,160
Speaker 2: had zero other red flags. He's respectful, considerate, loyal, he

1380
01:05:23,200 --> 01:05:27,000
Speaker 2: communicates well, and is emotionally intelligent. That's a lot of

1381
01:05:27,000 --> 01:05:30,160
Speaker 2: green flags. I love this person and feel he is

1382
01:05:30,240 --> 01:05:33,960
Speaker 2: my life partner based on our mutual connection. I understand

1383
01:05:34,000 --> 01:05:36,880
Speaker 2: the post may paint him poorly, but he is truly

1384
01:05:37,000 --> 01:05:39,640
Speaker 2: a good guy. So am I the a hole for

1385
01:05:39,680 --> 01:05:42,720
Speaker 2: giving an ultimatum? And there isn't edit really quick, I

1386
01:05:42,720 --> 01:05:45,560
Speaker 2: should add. After the first meeting went sour, he offered

1387
01:05:45,600 --> 01:05:49,200
Speaker 2: to set boundaries to eliminate in person hanging out and

1388
01:05:49,280 --> 01:05:51,800
Speaker 2: agreed she was a mess due to the outside anxious

1389
01:05:51,800 --> 01:05:54,400
Speaker 2: factors that caused her to be weird that day. Upon

1390
01:05:54,440 --> 01:05:57,480
Speaker 2: forgiving the original situation, I gave her a second chance

1391
01:05:57,520 --> 01:06:00,520
Speaker 2: to try again, where she exhibited the same behavior he

1392
01:06:00,560 --> 01:06:02,880
Speaker 2: did try to rectify the first time. I was the

1393
01:06:02,920 --> 01:06:06,280
Speaker 2: decider for giving her the second chance again. Boyfriend good

1394
01:06:06,680 --> 01:06:08,360
Speaker 2: Op good friend?

1395
01:06:08,440 --> 01:06:11,400
Speaker 1: The friends weird, Well, I'm happy. Wow, I was proven wrong. Usually,

1396
01:06:11,440 --> 01:06:14,160
Speaker 1: like with these stories, it's like, uh, but there was more.

1397
01:06:14,360 --> 01:06:17,000
Speaker 2: The partner was like W. He's like, you didn't know

1398
01:06:17,040 --> 01:06:19,800
Speaker 2: what you're right, W partner. And it sounds like even

1399
01:06:19,840 --> 01:06:22,400
Speaker 2: the partner was like she had other stuff going on

1400
01:06:22,440 --> 01:06:24,800
Speaker 2: that first time that was making her upset and anxious.

1401
01:06:24,840 --> 01:06:27,920
Speaker 2: But I doubt it. I bet you it was that

1402
01:06:27,920 --> 01:06:29,880
Speaker 2: that you're with another girl.

1403
01:06:30,560 --> 01:06:32,960
Speaker 1: Do you think there should have been one more chance

1404
01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:36,000
Speaker 1: for the friend with him talking to the friend like, Okay, no,

1405
01:06:36,760 --> 01:06:37,680
Speaker 1: you're a two chance guy.

1406
01:06:37,720 --> 01:06:39,600
Speaker 2: I just think based on the fact that there was

1407
01:06:39,680 --> 01:06:42,720
Speaker 2: already like a second chance given and it was exactly

1408
01:06:42,760 --> 01:06:45,120
Speaker 2: the same the second time, there's no reason for his

1409
01:06:45,200 --> 01:06:46,960
Speaker 2: friend to treat Op like that.

1410
01:06:47,080 --> 01:06:48,600
Speaker 1: I don't know if he actually had like a full

1411
01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:51,160
Speaker 1: on conversation with the friend like, oh, this is it,

1412
01:06:51,240 --> 01:06:53,160
Speaker 1: Like if you act like this one more time, our

1413
01:06:53,160 --> 01:06:53,760
Speaker 1: friendship was over.

1414
01:06:54,040 --> 01:06:56,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, but then it's like, you know, then she'll just

1415
01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:59,400
Speaker 2: like alter her behavior and it'll still be underneath it.

1416
01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:01,400
Speaker 1: And I want to see comments like would you guys

1417
01:07:01,520 --> 01:07:06,240
Speaker 1: if you were in not Ope's position, but Opie's partner's position.

1418
01:07:06,720 --> 01:07:08,320
Speaker 1: This is a friend that you care about and you've

1419
01:07:08,400 --> 01:07:10,640
Speaker 1: known for a while. Would you like just end the

1420
01:07:10,640 --> 01:07:13,280
Speaker 1: friendship now after two times it was weird, or like

1421
01:07:13,320 --> 01:07:15,760
Speaker 1: you have one more conversation, see where it goes, and

1422
01:07:15,800 --> 01:07:16,440
Speaker 1: then go from there.

1423
01:07:16,480 --> 01:07:18,400
Speaker 2: Would you do that? Let us know in the comments

1424
01:07:18,440 --> 01:07:20,280
Speaker 2: what you would do. But that is the end of

1425
01:07:20,280 --> 01:07:26,000
Speaker 2: that story.